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00:00:08,592 --> 00:00:11,505
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time ♪
2
00:00:11,678 --> 00:00:13,419
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
3
00:00:13,597 --> 00:00:15,259
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
4
00:00:15,432 --> 00:00:18,220
♪ Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪
5
00:00:18,393 --> 00:00:19,804
♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
6
00:00:19,978 --> 00:00:22,015
♪ People spouting,
"howdy, neighbor!" ♪
7
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,806
♪ Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
8
00:00:24,983 --> 00:00:28,351
♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
9
00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:32,148
♪ Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ♪
10
00:00:34,409 --> 00:00:39,655
♪♪
11
00:00:39,831 --> 00:00:41,788
Welcome to Netflix.
12
00:00:41,959 --> 00:00:45,248
Last year, we approved
16 original shows and movies,
13
00:00:45,420 --> 00:00:50,211
and this year, it is our goal
to make that number 1,087.
14
00:00:50,384 --> 00:00:53,218
That's why we here at Netflix
are thrilled to be working
15
00:00:53,387 --> 00:00:56,505
with you two comedy geniuses,
Terrance and Phillip.
16
00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:02,222
[ Farts ]
17
00:01:02,396 --> 00:01:03,853
[ Laughs ]
18
00:01:04,022 --> 00:01:05,433
Classic stuff.
19
00:01:05,607 --> 00:01:06,848
Now go ahead
and pitch what you're thinking
20
00:01:07,025 --> 00:01:08,732
for your Netflix
original series.
21
00:01:08,902 --> 00:01:12,020
Well, we were thinking
that we'd do a show
22
00:01:12,197 --> 00:01:14,109
where Phillip and I
are on a farm.
23
00:01:14,283 --> 00:01:15,990
With a cow.
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00:01:16,159 --> 00:01:18,446
[ Chuckling ] Okay,
I love it so far.
25
00:01:18,620 --> 00:01:21,237
The sun is just starting
to come up, and then...
26
00:01:21,415 --> 00:01:23,532
I fart on Phillip.
27
00:01:23,709 --> 00:01:28,374
And I say, "Terrance!
You farted!"
28
00:01:28,547 --> 00:01:30,038
And I...
29
00:01:30,215 --> 00:01:34,459
fart on Terrance.
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00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,343
And then it's like a back and forth
kind of thing? It's sort of like a...
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00:01:36,513 --> 00:01:40,427
It's like a back and forth
kind of thing.
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00:01:40,601 --> 00:01:44,140
I fart on him.
33
00:01:44,313 --> 00:01:45,645
He...
34
00:01:45,814 --> 00:01:47,180
farts...
35
00:01:47,357 --> 00:01:48,518
on...
36
00:01:48,692 --> 00:01:49,728
On you. Got it.
37
00:01:49,901 --> 00:01:51,267
No!
38
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:53,152
On the cow.
39
00:01:53,322 --> 00:01:54,984
- [ Laughs ]
- [ Laughs ]
40
00:01:55,157 --> 00:01:58,366
Welcome to Netflix,
you sons a bitches! Yeah!
41
00:01:58,535 --> 00:02:00,492
- Hooray.
- Hooray.
42
00:02:01,622 --> 00:02:04,660
[ School bell rings ]
43
00:02:04,833 --> 00:02:08,167
[ Children shouting excitedly ]
44
00:02:08,337 --> 00:02:09,498
Come on, Tweek!
Hurry!
45
00:02:09,671 --> 00:02:11,458
What's going on?
46
00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:14,591
Cartman and his girlfriend
are fighting again!
47
00:02:14,760 --> 00:02:18,253
[ Cartman grunting ]
48
00:02:18,430 --> 00:02:19,762
God damn it.
49
00:02:19,931 --> 00:02:21,047
- Sweetheart!
- Piece of shit!
50
00:02:21,224 --> 00:02:23,887
[ Cartman grunting ]
51
00:02:24,061 --> 00:02:25,518
Honey! I wanna watch
"Terrance and Phillip"
52
00:02:25,687 --> 00:02:27,098
tonight with my friends!
53
00:02:27,272 --> 00:02:28,729
You promised we'd have
a date night!
54
00:02:28,899 --> 00:02:30,686
Ugh!
55
00:02:30,859 --> 00:02:32,270
It's just one night, babe!
56
00:02:32,444 --> 00:02:33,480
Stan is having
a viewing party, honey!
57
00:02:33,654 --> 00:02:34,690
[ Grunts ]
58
00:02:34,863 --> 00:02:36,195
So then why can't I come?!
59
00:02:36,365 --> 00:02:38,106
"Terrance and Phillip"
is guys' night thing baby!
60
00:02:38,283 --> 00:02:39,524
Hey, hey, hey, hey!
61
00:02:39,701 --> 00:02:41,192
What the hell
are you all doing?!
62
00:02:41,370 --> 00:02:42,736
Watching Heidi
get her bitch-ass kicked!
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00:02:42,913 --> 00:02:43,949
Fuck you,
Wendy!
64
00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:45,329
Don't take that crap,
Heidi!
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00:02:45,499 --> 00:02:46,910
Let Cartman have it!
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00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:49,747
Guys! Guys, this has gone on
way too long!
67
00:02:49,920 --> 00:02:52,754
Can't we all stop being
so mean to each other?
68
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:56,962
Shut up, Kyle.
You sound like your mom.
69
00:02:57,135 --> 00:03:00,048
[ Laughter ]
70
00:03:00,222 --> 00:03:01,758
That was awesome, baby.
I love you.
71
00:03:01,932 --> 00:03:03,423
I love you, too,
babe.
72
00:03:03,600 --> 00:03:05,216
- Aww...
- Damn it.
73
00:03:05,394 --> 00:03:07,556
Fights over.
Kyle ruined it!
74
00:03:11,942 --> 00:03:13,103
All right, everyone.
Listen up.
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00:03:13,276 --> 00:03:15,393
As you know, there has been
a lot of bullying
76
00:03:15,570 --> 00:03:17,607
and insensitivity
at our school.
77
00:03:17,781 --> 00:03:19,693
To counteract this,
it is my firm belief
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00:03:19,866 --> 00:03:21,357
that South Park Elementary
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00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:24,198
is in desperate need
of a strong woman.
80
00:03:24,371 --> 00:03:25,987
So in looking for
a new vice principal,
81
00:03:26,164 --> 00:03:28,076
we wanted to find
a powerful, intelligent,
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00:03:28,250 --> 00:03:31,163
and independent female
to be a role model for us all.
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00:03:31,336 --> 00:03:32,543
And with that said,
I'd like to introduce
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00:03:32,713 --> 00:03:34,375
our new vice principal...
Strong Woman.
85
00:03:34,548 --> 00:03:36,881
[ Claps ]
86
00:03:37,843 --> 00:03:39,050
Thank you,
PC Principal.
87
00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:40,755
All right, everyone.
Listen up.
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00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:42,545
I'm the new vice principal
of the school.
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00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:44,589
My name is Strong Woman.
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00:03:44,766 --> 00:03:46,382
I've already spent a few days
here at the school
91
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:48,222
watching and observing,
92
00:03:48,395 --> 00:03:50,387
and we definitely have things
we can all be working on.
93
00:03:50,564 --> 00:03:51,600
Hey!
Stotch!
94
00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:53,105
You do not disrespect
Strong Woman
95
00:03:53,275 --> 00:03:55,392
by talking
when she's talking.
96
00:03:55,569 --> 00:03:57,356
You really think I couldn't have
handled that myself?
97
00:03:57,529 --> 00:03:59,441
Oh! Uh, I was just
making sure everything was...
98
00:03:59,614 --> 00:04:01,697
You really had to grab the mic
out of my hand like that?
99
00:04:01,867 --> 00:04:03,199
Shit. I mean... No, sorry.
Sorry, I'm not...
100
00:04:03,368 --> 00:04:04,859
Uh, here you go.
101
00:04:05,036 --> 00:04:06,243
I want the girls
here at this school
102
00:04:06,413 --> 00:04:07,870
to know that they can talk to me
about anything.
103
00:04:08,039 --> 00:04:09,405
But I also want
the boys to know
104
00:04:09,583 --> 00:04:11,745
that what I'm looking for
is a better place for everybody.
105
00:04:11,918 --> 00:04:13,159
Turning this school around
106
00:04:13,336 --> 00:04:14,452
is going to take work
from everyone.
107
00:04:14,629 --> 00:04:17,212
From everyone.
108
00:04:17,382 --> 00:04:19,840
I'm sorry. Am I not
doing this correctly?
109
00:04:20,010 --> 00:04:23,424
No. No. Sorry! I thought I'd add...
Just add for emphasis.
110
00:04:23,597 --> 00:04:26,886
You felt it wasn't
strong enough, me just saying it?
111
00:04:27,058 --> 00:04:30,722
No, I'm...
Uh, I'm sorry.
112
00:04:30,896 --> 00:04:32,808
I'm looking forward to being
your vice principal.
113
00:04:32,981 --> 00:04:35,473
And I'm looking forward to
turning this school around.
114
00:04:35,650 --> 00:04:36,606
All right. Now,
if we have any que...
115
00:04:36,777 --> 00:04:38,268
I'm not finished.
116
00:04:38,445 --> 00:04:39,652
Right!
Oh, I'm sorry.
117
00:04:39,821 --> 00:04:41,608
Pay attention, everybody!
118
00:04:41,782 --> 00:04:45,071
♪♪
119
00:04:45,243 --> 00:04:48,236
It's "The Terrance
& Phillip Show!"
120
00:04:48,413 --> 00:04:49,654
On Netflix.
121
00:04:49,831 --> 00:04:52,665
♪♪
122
00:04:52,834 --> 00:04:54,496
Hey, Terrance!
123
00:04:54,669 --> 00:04:59,130
What did the black lawyer
say to the Muslim priest?
124
00:04:59,299 --> 00:05:02,258
I don't know, Phillip.
What?
125
00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:10,053
[ Farts ]
126
00:05:10,227 --> 00:05:11,388
[ Laughs ]
127
00:05:11,561 --> 00:05:13,803
[ Laughs ]
128
00:05:13,980 --> 00:05:15,061
[ Laughter ]
129
00:05:15,232 --> 00:05:16,063
[ Doorbell rings ]
130
00:05:16,233 --> 00:05:18,976
Come in!
[ Door opens ]
131
00:05:19,152 --> 00:05:21,144
- Did we miss it?
- It's just starting.
132
00:05:21,321 --> 00:05:22,903
Oh, look, honey...
Kyle's mom is here!
133
00:05:23,073 --> 00:05:24,530
Shouldn't you be at Temple,
Ms. Broflovski?
134
00:05:24,699 --> 00:05:26,861
[ Laughter ]
135
00:05:27,035 --> 00:05:28,367
Hola.
136
00:05:28,537 --> 00:05:30,574
Would you like to buy
some chimichangas?
137
00:05:30,747 --> 00:05:32,488
Sí, mi amigo!
138
00:05:32,666 --> 00:05:35,283
Here. I'll give you
two pesos.
139
00:05:35,460 --> 00:05:36,667
[ Farts ]
[ Farts ]
140
00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:38,499
[ Laughing and farting ]
141
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:40,083
[ Laughter ]
142
00:05:40,257 --> 00:05:41,839
Dude,
that's awesome!
143
00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:44,876
[ Laughter ]
144
00:05:45,053 --> 00:05:46,589
Wha-What's wrong,
dude?
145
00:05:46,763 --> 00:05:48,095
For the first time,
I feel kinda bad
146
00:05:48,265 --> 00:05:50,427
for the person
being farted on.
147
00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:52,307
Ohp. Kyle's mom doesn't like
the cartoon, guys.
148
00:05:52,477 --> 00:05:55,470
Better shut it off.
[ Laughter ]
149
00:05:55,647 --> 00:05:58,185
Baby, I fuckin' love you
so much.
150
00:06:01,486 --> 00:06:03,193
All right, everyone.
Listen up.
151
00:06:03,363 --> 00:06:05,195
As you all know, we've been
looking for a strong woman
152
00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,652
to take on the roll of
vice principal at this school.
153
00:06:07,826 --> 00:06:09,613
We couldn't be happier
with the selection we've made,
154
00:06:09,786 --> 00:06:12,153
and we're sure she'll be making
our school a better place.
155
00:06:12,330 --> 00:06:14,322
So with that,
let me turn over the floor
156
00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:16,536
to our new vice principal...
Strong Woman.
157
00:06:16,710 --> 00:06:19,043
[Applause ]
158
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:21,204
Thanks, everyone.
All right. Listen up.
159
00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:22,588
I fully appreciate
that some of you
160
00:06:22,757 --> 00:06:24,623
might be uncomfortable
with me being here.
161
00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:26,793
Earlier today, I noticed that
some faculty
162
00:06:26,970 --> 00:06:30,213
weren't sure whether to call me
Miss Woman or just Strong.
163
00:06:30,390 --> 00:06:31,801
If I were a man,
you'd probably address me
164
00:06:31,975 --> 00:06:33,557
as Vice Principal Woman,
165
00:06:33,727 --> 00:06:34,934
so why would it should it be
any different, huh?
166
00:06:35,103 --> 00:06:38,062
- We good?
- M'kay.
167
00:06:38,231 --> 00:06:39,972
So I've been getting to know
some of the students here,
168
00:06:40,150 --> 00:06:41,357
and I'm definitely hearing
169
00:06:41,526 --> 00:06:43,062
a lot of frustration
and confusion
170
00:06:43,236 --> 00:06:45,273
over issues that all the schools
are facing right now.
171
00:06:45,447 --> 00:06:47,780
I also spent some time
observing in the cafeteria
172
00:06:47,949 --> 00:06:49,406
and was pretty shocked by the
abusive and intolerant language.
173
00:06:49,576 --> 00:06:50,657
[ Hootie and the Blowfish's
"Hold My Hand" plays ]
174
00:06:50,827 --> 00:06:53,194
Not sure if any of you
have noticed,
175
00:06:53,371 --> 00:06:55,579
♪ With a little love ♪
but a lot of the girls are eating their lunches
176
00:06:55,749 --> 00:06:56,865
♪ And some tenderness ♪
out on the playground to avoid being around
177
00:06:57,042 --> 00:06:59,159
the toxic environment
that's been created.
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00:06:59,336 --> 00:07:01,999
♪ We'll walk upon the water ♪
It's my intention to make the cafeteria...
179
00:07:02,172 --> 00:07:04,880
♪ We'll rise above the mess ♪
180
00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:07,633
♪ With a little peace ♪
P.E. class is another huge problem at this school.
181
00:07:07,802 --> 00:07:11,261
♪ And some harmony ♪
The girls' gym outfits...
182
00:07:11,431 --> 00:07:13,013
♪ We'll take the world together ♪
...seem not to have been updated since the '60s.
183
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:14,970
We have a lot of work to do
here, I intend to do it quickly.
184
00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:16,634
Excuse me.
I-I'm sorry,
185
00:07:16,811 --> 00:07:19,679
but, uh, is anyone else
hearing Hootie and the Blowfish
186
00:07:19,856 --> 00:07:21,563
like very, very softly?
187
00:07:21,733 --> 00:07:23,645
♪ 'Cause I wanna run with you ♪
188
00:07:23,818 --> 00:07:25,184
Yeah, yeah.
I hear it.
189
00:07:25,362 --> 00:07:28,275
It's - It's coming
from over here somewhere.
190
00:07:28,448 --> 00:07:30,405
Excuse me, everyone. I, um... I need to get
to the restroom.
191
00:07:30,575 --> 00:07:31,611
Sorry.
I'll be right back.
192
00:07:31,785 --> 00:07:39,454
[ Children shouting, laughing ]
193
00:07:39,626 --> 00:07:41,413
[ Farts, laughs ]
194
00:07:41,586 --> 00:07:43,828
[ Farts ]
[ Laughter ]
195
00:07:44,005 --> 00:07:44,836
Hold on, hold on.
Over here. Over here.
196
00:07:45,006 --> 00:07:48,044
[ Farting ]
197
00:07:48,218 --> 00:07:50,301
[ Farts ]
[ Laughs ]
198
00:07:50,470 --> 00:07:52,006
[ Farting, laughing ]
199
00:07:52,180 --> 00:07:56,299
♪♪
200
00:07:56,476 --> 00:07:57,637
Join together, let no man...
[ Farts ]
201
00:07:57,811 --> 00:07:59,052
Ugh!
202
00:07:59,229 --> 00:08:07,023
♪♪
203
00:08:07,195 --> 00:08:15,240
♪♪
204
00:08:15,412 --> 00:08:19,326
Man: That's it.
That's it, Kyle.
205
00:08:19,499 --> 00:08:29,498
♪♪
206
00:08:31,761 --> 00:08:33,923
No more.
207
00:08:34,097 --> 00:08:38,262
No more of them doody jokes.
208
00:08:38,435 --> 00:08:40,722
No more watching cartoons
of people...
209
00:08:40,895 --> 00:08:44,479
people having to go doody,
210
00:08:44,649 --> 00:08:47,858
and poo-pooing
on each other's heads.
211
00:08:48,028 --> 00:08:50,145
It's not funny anymore,
is it, Kyle?
212
00:08:50,321 --> 00:08:53,689
♪♪
213
00:08:53,867 --> 00:08:59,204
[ Hootie and the Blowfish's
"Hold My Hand" plays ]
214
00:08:59,372 --> 00:09:00,237
♪ With a little love ♪
215
00:09:00,415 --> 00:09:02,077
[ Music plays muffled ]
216
00:09:02,250 --> 00:09:03,786
♪ And some tenderness ♪
217
00:09:03,960 --> 00:09:05,576
[ Music plays normally ]
218
00:09:05,754 --> 00:09:08,588
[ Muffled ]
♪ We'll walk upon the water ♪
219
00:09:08,757 --> 00:09:10,965
[ Music stops ]
220
00:09:11,134 --> 00:09:12,375
Hello there, Mister...
221
00:09:12,552 --> 00:09:13,588
Principal, is it?
222
00:09:13,762 --> 00:09:15,378
That's right.
I'm PC Principal.
223
00:09:15,555 --> 00:09:16,921
What's bringing you
in today?
224
00:09:17,098 --> 00:09:19,590
I'm, uh, having this problem
with my ears.
225
00:09:19,768 --> 00:09:22,385
There's like a persistent kind
of a... ringing going on.
226
00:09:22,562 --> 00:09:25,305
Okay.
Can you describe the ringing?
227
00:09:25,482 --> 00:09:27,690
It's, uh,
Hootie and the Blowfish.
228
00:09:27,859 --> 00:09:29,566
You're hearing a song?
229
00:09:29,736 --> 00:09:32,319
Yeah, um, [clears throat]
there's a new woman
230
00:09:32,489 --> 00:09:34,902
that has joined our faculty.
Her name is Strong Woman.
231
00:09:35,075 --> 00:09:36,441
And, uh, she seems
to have set off
232
00:09:36,618 --> 00:09:38,234
some kind of device
in my ears.
233
00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:41,245
So, maybe you're having
some feelings for her.
234
00:09:41,414 --> 00:09:43,155
No, that couldn't be it.
We work in the same place,
235
00:09:43,333 --> 00:09:44,915
so it'd be impossible
for me to like her.
236
00:09:45,085 --> 00:09:47,202
I'm thinking there must be
some kind of device in my ears.
237
00:09:47,378 --> 00:09:48,994
Well, I looked,
238
00:09:49,172 --> 00:09:51,755
and Hootie and the Blowfish
aren't in your ears.
239
00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:55,384
I believe your hearing them
in your mind and your heart.
240
00:09:55,553 --> 00:09:57,545
Oh, dude.
241
00:09:57,722 --> 00:09:59,133
Bro.
242
00:10:05,480 --> 00:10:07,437
[ Knock on door]
243
00:10:07,607 --> 00:10:09,348
You may enter.
244
00:10:12,403 --> 00:10:13,644
Vice Principal Woman?
245
00:10:13,822 --> 00:10:16,280
Yes?
What can I do for you?
246
00:10:16,449 --> 00:10:17,860
My name's Kyle,
247
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:19,866
and I've been doing
a lot of changing lately.
248
00:10:20,036 --> 00:10:22,198
I came because I might
be able to offer some...
249
00:10:22,372 --> 00:10:23,783
insight into
our problems here.
250
00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:25,869
Please.
By all means.
251
00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:28,329
You see, there's a culture
at this school
252
00:10:28,503 --> 00:10:30,119
that embraces meanness,
253
00:10:30,296 --> 00:10:32,788
and I believe now it comes
from a Canadian TV show.
254
00:10:32,966 --> 00:10:35,003
All the boys watch it.
I did, too.
255
00:10:35,176 --> 00:10:36,792
We all laughed
while they...
256
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:38,962
farted
on innocent people's heads.
257
00:10:39,139 --> 00:10:40,505
The thing is...
258
00:10:40,682 --> 00:10:42,594
I never felt for the person
being farted on...
259
00:10:42,767 --> 00:10:45,100
until now.
260
00:10:45,270 --> 00:10:47,182
I want to work with you
to try open people's eyes.
261
00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:49,768
Because I get it now.
262
00:10:49,941 --> 00:10:52,979
You want to blame farts?
263
00:10:53,153 --> 00:10:54,940
That seems kind of ridiculous,
doesn't it?
264
00:10:56,030 --> 00:10:57,237
What?
265
00:10:57,407 --> 00:10:58,648
I mean, it's a slippery slope
266
00:10:58,825 --> 00:10:59,565
when we start
pointing the finger
267
00:10:59,742 --> 00:11:01,529
for our own short comings.
268
00:11:01,703 --> 00:11:03,740
But... But I thought for sure
you would be on my side.
269
00:11:03,913 --> 00:11:06,246
Kind of sounds like something my
mother would say, actually.
270
00:11:06,416 --> 00:11:08,829
What?!
Oh, forget it!
271
00:11:11,629 --> 00:11:13,837
Cartman: May I have
your attention please?
272
00:11:14,007 --> 00:11:15,623
Mrs. Broflovski,
your tampons
273
00:11:15,800 --> 00:11:16,916
are available
at the front desk.
274
00:11:17,093 --> 00:11:19,085
Mrs. Broflovski,
your tampons
275
00:11:19,262 --> 00:11:20,048
are available
at the front desk.
276
00:11:20,221 --> 00:11:21,712
Thank you.
[Laughs]
277
00:11:21,890 --> 00:11:23,677
[ Laughter ]
278
00:11:23,850 --> 00:11:26,467
Heidi: [Laughs] Come on.
We gotta get outta here!
279
00:11:26,644 --> 00:11:28,806
[ Growls ]
280
00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:32,348
♪ Hold my hand ♪
281
00:11:32,525 --> 00:11:34,437
♪ Want you to hold my hand ♪
282
00:11:34,611 --> 00:11:36,568
♪ Hold my hand ♪
283
00:11:36,738 --> 00:11:37,899
You wanted to see me,
PC Principal?
284
00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:39,313
♪ I'll take you to... ♪
Oh, yes!
285
00:11:39,490 --> 00:11:40,731
Yes, Mackey, uh...
286
00:11:40,909 --> 00:11:42,366
I just wanted to see
how you thought
287
00:11:42,535 --> 00:11:43,867
it was going with
Strong Woman.
288
00:11:44,037 --> 00:11:46,154
Well, she seems to be
acclimating fine, m'kay.
289
00:11:46,331 --> 00:11:47,412
The kids really respect her.
290
00:11:47,582 --> 00:11:49,164
Do you know, um...
291
00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:51,872
Do you know if Strong Woman
has a boyfriend?
292
00:11:52,045 --> 00:11:52,956
What?!
293
00:11:53,129 --> 00:11:54,336
Nothing.
Just forget it.
294
00:11:54,505 --> 00:11:56,087
Are you out of your
fuckin' mind?!
295
00:11:56,257 --> 00:11:58,874
Askin' if a co-worker is
available in today's times?!
296
00:11:59,052 --> 00:12:01,294
I just wanted to know
because if she's unavailable,
297
00:12:01,471 --> 00:12:03,463
then maybe I can get my head
off of her, all right?!
298
00:12:03,640 --> 00:12:05,597
Oh, boy, this is bad.
299
00:12:05,767 --> 00:12:07,759
This is real bad.
300
00:12:07,936 --> 00:12:08,767
I don't know
how it happened.
301
00:12:08,937 --> 00:12:10,178
I know it's inappropriate,
302
00:12:10,355 --> 00:12:11,596
and yet I can't stop
thinking about her.
303
00:12:11,773 --> 00:12:13,264
I think I'm sick.
304
00:12:13,441 --> 00:12:17,230
Look, this is real fuckin' fire
you're playin' with, m'kay?
305
00:12:17,403 --> 00:12:19,360
I'm gonna get someone
down here from HR!
306
00:12:19,530 --> 00:12:22,364
HR? Is that, like,
Hootie removal?
307
00:12:22,533 --> 00:12:24,195
No, Human Resources!
308
00:12:24,369 --> 00:12:25,780
The people that come in
to make sure everything's
309
00:12:25,954 --> 00:12:27,070
kept on the level.
310
00:12:27,247 --> 00:12:30,331
We gotta get you
back on track!
311
00:12:33,378 --> 00:12:36,587
Is Canada a bad influence
on the United States?
312
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:40,170
A group of young people called
"Millennials Against Canada"
313
00:12:40,343 --> 00:12:43,336
think so, and we are joined by
their leader, Kyle Broflovski.
314
00:12:43,513 --> 00:12:45,254
Thanks for having me, Tom.
315
00:12:45,431 --> 00:12:48,424
Young man, you say Canada is to
blame for most of our problems.
316
00:12:48,601 --> 00:12:51,059
All I'm saying is that there's
a culture that originates
317
00:12:51,229 --> 00:12:53,095
from Canada which is at least
partly to blame for the state
318
00:12:53,273 --> 00:12:54,514
of our country now.
319
00:12:54,691 --> 00:12:56,102
To respond to this,
we're now joined
320
00:12:56,276 --> 00:12:57,938
by the Canadian Minister
of Streaming.
321
00:12:58,111 --> 00:13:00,068
Thanks for having me, buddy.
322
00:13:00,238 --> 00:13:02,776
Minister, how do you answer
to these angry millennials?
323
00:13:02,949 --> 00:13:04,656
Well, they're pissed off
because their country sucks,
324
00:13:04,826 --> 00:13:06,067
so they wanna point
the finger at us.
325
00:13:06,244 --> 00:13:07,860
I'm saying we're
all guilty, too.
326
00:13:08,037 --> 00:13:10,654
I grew up watching Terrance and Phillip,
and I though it was funny.
327
00:13:10,832 --> 00:13:13,199
So, you thought it was funny,
but now it's not funny?
328
00:13:13,418 --> 00:13:14,784
No. It was never funny,
I see it differently now.
329
00:13:14,961 --> 00:13:16,122
Oh, so you want to censor it?
330
00:13:16,296 --> 00:13:17,582
We don't want to censor it,
331
00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:19,417
we just want to
get rid of it!
332
00:13:19,590 --> 00:13:21,547
Uh-huh.
You sound like a Jewish Mother.
333
00:13:21,718 --> 00:13:24,381
Oh, see?! That's what I'm
talking about right there!
334
00:13:24,554 --> 00:13:27,171
That kind of mean, degrading,
Canadian trash.
335
00:13:27,348 --> 00:13:29,260
Now, I resent that!
I find that racist.
336
00:13:29,434 --> 00:13:30,800
Canadians should care about
the rest of the world!
337
00:13:30,977 --> 00:13:32,218
You are a racist, fwiend!
338
00:13:32,395 --> 00:13:33,761
And if you have a problem
with Canada,
339
00:13:33,938 --> 00:13:35,019
maybe you should talk to
your backward president!
340
00:13:35,189 --> 00:13:36,680
- Maybe I will!
- 'Kay, go ahead!
341
00:13:36,858 --> 00:13:38,065
Maybe I know
the president.
342
00:13:38,234 --> 00:13:39,441
Oh, sure you do,
just like all Jewish moms
343
00:13:39,610 --> 00:13:40,851
because you don't understand
how...
344
00:13:41,029 --> 00:13:42,486
- Stop calling me that!
- Can I finish?!
345
00:13:42,655 --> 00:13:43,486
That's all you know
is how to be mean and...
346
00:13:43,656 --> 00:13:44,988
There's not a...
Can I finish please?!
347
00:13:45,158 --> 00:13:46,615
Because you were all
raised on it yourselves!
348
00:13:46,784 --> 00:13:48,491
Please, can I finish?!
349
00:13:50,538 --> 00:13:51,870
All right, I'm finished.
350
00:13:52,040 --> 00:13:54,202
All right, everyone, listen up.
351
00:13:54,375 --> 00:13:56,583
As you know we want to provide
a safe work environment
352
00:13:56,753 --> 00:13:58,085
for all our employees.
353
00:13:58,254 --> 00:13:59,916
Sometimes feelings do arise
354
00:14:00,089 --> 00:14:02,797
and we are tempted by the devil
to act upon them.
355
00:14:02,967 --> 00:14:04,924
So we've been reaching out
to Human Resources Division
356
00:14:05,094 --> 00:14:06,630
as I think we can all
use someone to tell us
357
00:14:06,804 --> 00:14:09,421
about what is and isn't
considered misconduct.
358
00:14:09,599 --> 00:14:11,135
She has some great advice
for us,
359
00:14:11,309 --> 00:14:13,392
so now please welcome
Heather Conduct.
360
00:14:13,561 --> 00:14:14,927
Go ahead, Miss Conduct.
361
00:14:15,104 --> 00:14:17,016
Hello, everyone,
my name is Miss Conduct.
362
00:14:17,190 --> 00:14:18,852
I'm here to talk about
making sure we avoid
363
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:21,813
any trouble at this school,
m'all right?
364
00:14:21,986 --> 00:14:23,773
M'kay.
365
00:14:23,946 --> 00:14:24,561
M'all right.
366
00:14:24,739 --> 00:14:26,480
Now, by a show of hands,
367
00:14:26,657 --> 00:14:29,991
who's ever had inappropriate
feelings for a co-worker?
368
00:14:38,586 --> 00:14:41,624
Well, hello there,
little girl.
369
00:14:41,798 --> 00:14:44,916
Are you selling
girl scout cookies?
370
00:14:45,093 --> 00:14:47,506
Why, yes I am.
How about a snickerdoodle?
371
00:14:47,678 --> 00:14:52,798
All right.
You asked for it.
372
00:14:52,975 --> 00:14:55,342
[ Farts ]
373
00:14:55,520 --> 00:14:56,931
[ Laughs ]
374
00:14:57,105 --> 00:14:58,266
[ Laughs ]
375
00:14:58,439 --> 00:15:01,728
Oh! Oh, I think
I shit my pants.
376
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,688
[ Whistle blows ]
377
00:15:03,861 --> 00:15:05,727
All right! That's it!
Everyone stop!
378
00:15:05,905 --> 00:15:08,192
We're shutting it down!
379
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,787
We are
Millennials Against Canada!
380
00:15:15,957 --> 00:15:17,539
We demand this kind of bullying
381
00:15:17,708 --> 00:15:19,495
Canadian entertainment
be stopped!
382
00:15:19,669 --> 00:15:21,706
Didn't think I'd live
long enough to see
383
00:15:21,879 --> 00:15:23,871
this all happen again.
384
00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:29,593
More and more millennials
are turning into Jewish mothers
385
00:15:29,762 --> 00:15:32,971
today as they demand
the censorship of entertainment.
386
00:15:33,141 --> 00:15:35,975
The protesters say they're
not giving up and are demanding
387
00:15:36,144 --> 00:15:38,807
to speak with the president
of the United States.
388
00:15:38,980 --> 00:15:40,221
[ Cellphone ringing ]
389
00:15:40,398 --> 00:15:42,014
Here you go! Call is
coming in on your phone!
390
00:15:42,191 --> 00:15:43,682
Good give it here!
Yes, hello?
391
00:15:43,860 --> 00:15:46,603
This is the leader of
the Millennials Against Canada.
392
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:48,896
Kyle, what the fuck
are you doing?
393
00:15:49,073 --> 00:15:51,565
Oh, I'm sorry I'm taking
a stand and doing something.
394
00:15:51,742 --> 00:15:54,530
I realize this doesn't gel
with your nihilism!
395
00:15:54,704 --> 00:15:56,946
Okay, dude. I didn't
want to have say this,
396
00:15:57,123 --> 00:15:59,206
but you're really starting
to sound like your mom.
397
00:15:59,375 --> 00:16:00,411
I'm not like my mom!
398
00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:01,826
I'm gonna make a difference!
399
00:16:02,003 --> 00:16:02,914
It's gonna feel real good!
400
00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:04,623
Kyle? Kyle!
401
00:16:04,797 --> 00:16:06,129
Don't do this man!
402
00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:07,289
You can't mess
with this shit
403
00:16:07,467 --> 00:16:08,708
while You Know Who
is in office!
404
00:16:08,885 --> 00:16:10,672
We're all gonna die!!
405
00:16:12,930 --> 00:16:14,512
♪♪
406
00:16:14,682 --> 00:16:16,674
M'all right,
so now everyone,
407
00:16:16,851 --> 00:16:18,888
we're gonna do some
role playing, m'all right,
408
00:16:19,061 --> 00:16:22,350
talk about appropriate ways
we can talk in the workplace.
409
00:16:22,523 --> 00:16:24,765
Can I... Can I get a volunteer
to role play with me?
410
00:16:24,942 --> 00:16:27,150
M'all right?
How about you Mister, uh...
411
00:16:27,320 --> 00:16:28,936
Mr. Mackey.
412
00:16:29,113 --> 00:16:31,480
M'all right, come on up here.
413
00:16:31,657 --> 00:16:33,569
M'all right now,
we're just gonna pretend
414
00:16:33,743 --> 00:16:34,824
it's a normal morning
before work
415
00:16:34,994 --> 00:16:36,530
and we're startin' the day.
M'all right?
416
00:16:36,704 --> 00:16:39,242
Oh, Mr. Mackey,
good morning.
417
00:16:39,415 --> 00:16:42,032
Good morning, uh,
Miss Conduct.
418
00:16:42,210 --> 00:16:43,371
Now did you have
a nice night?
419
00:16:43,544 --> 00:16:45,752
Yeah, yeah, it was good.
420
00:16:45,922 --> 00:16:48,084
M'all right, okay, well,
good luck today,
421
00:16:48,257 --> 00:16:49,589
and I hope that
our working relationship
422
00:16:49,759 --> 00:16:51,876
can continue be honest
and straightforward.
423
00:16:52,053 --> 00:16:54,887
Oh, I'm very open and honest,
I promise you that.
424
00:16:55,056 --> 00:16:57,799
I can see that, you've got
very honest eyes, m'all right.
425
00:16:57,975 --> 00:16:59,432
M'all right, I probably
shouldn't have said
426
00:16:59,602 --> 00:17:00,763
"You have honest eyes,"
m'all right.
427
00:17:00,937 --> 00:17:02,473
That's a bit crossin'
the line commenting
428
00:17:02,647 --> 00:17:04,639
on his physical attributes,
m'all right? That's bad.
429
00:17:04,815 --> 00:17:07,228
I'm gonna stick to just talking
about work only, m'all right?
430
00:17:07,401 --> 00:17:09,358
So, uh, Mr. Mackey,
what methods do you use
431
00:17:09,529 --> 00:17:11,020
for counseling the students?
432
00:17:11,197 --> 00:17:13,280
Oh, I mostly use
a semi-cognitive approach
433
00:17:13,449 --> 00:17:14,860
adapted
by Kiezrick Solomon.
434
00:17:15,034 --> 00:17:16,400
Wow, you studied Solomon?
435
00:17:16,577 --> 00:17:18,409
He was actually my thesis
in college.
436
00:17:18,579 --> 00:17:21,117
Are you serious? Nobody I talk
to has ever even heard of him!
437
00:17:21,290 --> 00:17:22,622
No! Same here!
438
00:17:22,792 --> 00:17:24,658
What made you attracted
to his work?
439
00:17:24,835 --> 00:17:26,667
Well, it's just such
a natural approach, m'kay.
440
00:17:26,837 --> 00:17:28,453
M'all right.
M'all right.
441
00:17:28,631 --> 00:17:29,587
When I read it, you know,
first, I was like,
442
00:17:29,757 --> 00:17:31,623
- "Whoa, okay."
- M'all right.
443
00:17:31,801 --> 00:17:33,258
"This just really makes
sense," you know?
444
00:17:33,427 --> 00:17:35,089
[ Chuckles ]
Well, m'all right.
445
00:17:35,263 --> 00:17:36,845
Mmm'kay.
446
00:17:37,014 --> 00:17:38,255
M'all right.
447
00:17:46,190 --> 00:17:48,307
Mister President, you need
to do something
448
00:17:48,484 --> 00:17:50,441
about your millennials!
449
00:17:50,611 --> 00:17:53,854
What do you want me to do?
450
00:17:54,031 --> 00:17:56,273
Terrance and Phillip
are Canada's largest export!
451
00:17:56,450 --> 00:17:59,158
They account for 80%
of our gross national product!
452
00:17:59,328 --> 00:18:01,911
If your citizens mess with them,
they mess with all of us.
453
00:18:02,081 --> 00:18:05,495
Look, I'm president
of the United States.
454
00:18:05,668 --> 00:18:08,081
I can't get involved
in every petty little protest
455
00:18:08,254 --> 00:18:09,870
against a third world country.
456
00:18:10,047 --> 00:18:12,084
Third world country?!
How dare you!
457
00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:13,794
Canada is second world at least!
458
00:18:13,968 --> 00:18:16,335
Now, you listen here,
Mr. Buddy!
459
00:18:16,512 --> 00:18:19,346
Either you stop the embargo on
the "Terrance and Phillip show,"
460
00:18:19,515 --> 00:18:22,098
or we'll bring in our own troops
to stop it ourselves!
461
00:18:22,268 --> 00:18:25,261
Are you threatening us,
you beady-eyed Canuck?
462
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:27,680
I'm simply telling you
that Canada will do
463
00:18:27,857 --> 00:18:29,519
what it must
to protect itself!
464
00:18:29,692 --> 00:18:32,685
Then I guess both our countries
better be prepared.
465
00:18:32,862 --> 00:18:36,151
[ Dramatic music plays ]
466
00:18:36,324 --> 00:18:37,690
And then, you know,
I was looking for
467
00:18:37,867 --> 00:18:38,778
something to get away
from the city.
468
00:18:38,951 --> 00:18:40,192
I've never really been
a city person.
469
00:18:40,369 --> 00:18:41,485
M'all right. M'all right.
470
00:18:41,662 --> 00:18:43,119
I definitely get that.
M'all right.
471
00:18:43,289 --> 00:18:44,200
I like hiking around,
being around in nature, m'kay.
472
00:18:44,373 --> 00:18:46,114
I agree, I agree,
the city's bad.
473
00:18:46,292 --> 00:18:48,909
I love hiking, too. What are
some of your favorite places?
474
00:18:49,086 --> 00:18:50,918
Well you know Mount Evans
is always nice.
475
00:18:51,088 --> 00:18:52,124
[ Chuckles ] M'all right.
M'all right.
476
00:18:52,298 --> 00:18:53,960
[ Siren wailing ]
477
00:18:54,133 --> 00:18:56,295
[Alarm bell rings ]
478
00:18:56,469 --> 00:18:57,459
What the hell is that?
479
00:18:57,637 --> 00:18:59,424
There's some kind of...
480
00:18:59,597 --> 00:19:01,509
military alert going out.
481
00:19:01,682 --> 00:19:03,514
All right,
military alert everyone.
482
00:19:03,684 --> 00:19:04,845
Let's get to the hallways
483
00:19:05,019 --> 00:19:05,600
and get the students
to the gymnasium.
484
00:19:05,770 --> 00:19:07,557
Come on. Let's move!
485
00:19:07,730 --> 00:19:10,222
[ Helicopter blades whirring ]
486
00:19:10,399 --> 00:19:12,686
[ Sirens wailing ]
487
00:19:12,860 --> 00:19:14,692
It's the National Guard!
488
00:19:14,862 --> 00:19:16,194
The National Guard?!
489
00:19:16,364 --> 00:19:18,572
It's the president!
He wants to talk to you.
490
00:19:18,741 --> 00:19:20,528
Yes, this is
Millennials Against Canada.
491
00:19:20,701 --> 00:19:22,738
Yeah, listen this thing
is kind of escalating.
492
00:19:22,912 --> 00:19:24,778
You people need to
call it quits.
493
00:19:24,955 --> 00:19:26,446
We can't do that,
Mr. President.
494
00:19:26,624 --> 00:19:28,115
Someone has to do
what's right!
495
00:19:28,292 --> 00:19:30,955
What exactly do you want?
496
00:19:31,128 --> 00:19:32,835
What do I want?!
497
00:19:33,005 --> 00:19:34,746
I want a world...
498
00:19:34,924 --> 00:19:37,667
where laughter doesn't come
at someone else's expense,
499
00:19:37,843 --> 00:19:42,053
where people can live freely
without fear of being farted on.
500
00:19:42,223 --> 00:19:46,809
I want a world where you aren't
ridiculed for trying to help!
501
00:19:46,977 --> 00:19:49,765
A world where a nice girl
that I liked
502
00:19:49,939 --> 00:19:52,056
isn't turned into
another Eric Cartman!
503
00:19:52,233 --> 00:19:54,691
These Canadians are
in the way of that world
504
00:19:54,860 --> 00:19:57,273
and everything they do
and everything they have done
505
00:19:57,446 --> 00:19:59,608
needs to be erased
from the Earth!
506
00:20:00,825 --> 00:20:03,033
Geez, I got a little chub.
507
00:20:03,202 --> 00:20:05,694
[ Children screaming ]
508
00:20:05,871 --> 00:20:08,659
Let's go!
Everyone to the gymnasium now!
509
00:20:08,833 --> 00:20:10,620
You heard her!
Move it people!
510
00:20:10,793 --> 00:20:13,581
[ Screaming continues ]
511
00:20:13,754 --> 00:20:15,211
I have to make sure all
the classrooms are empty.
512
00:20:15,381 --> 00:20:16,997
You go take cover
with the kids!
513
00:20:17,174 --> 00:20:18,335
I'm coming, too!
514
00:20:18,509 --> 00:20:20,501
I'm your Vice Principal!
515
00:20:20,678 --> 00:20:22,294
All right, come on!
516
00:20:24,223 --> 00:20:26,055
- Oh, no.
- What's wrong?
517
00:20:26,308 --> 00:20:28,140
Vice Principal Woman,
I need to ask you something.
518
00:20:28,310 --> 00:20:30,267
- Okay.
- This is very difficult, but, uh...
519
00:20:30,438 --> 00:20:31,895
What? What?!
520
00:20:32,064 --> 00:20:32,975
[ Clears throat]
Well, as you can see,
521
00:20:33,149 --> 00:20:34,435
there is a door
in front of us.
522
00:20:34,608 --> 00:20:35,815
Yes, there is.
523
00:20:35,985 --> 00:20:36,975
I would like to open
this door for you,
524
00:20:37,153 --> 00:20:39,361
however I understand
the gender-based biases
525
00:20:39,530 --> 00:20:41,192
that this could imply.
- Why do you need to open the door?
526
00:20:41,365 --> 00:20:42,731
I don't need to open
the door.
527
00:20:42,908 --> 00:20:44,240
I'd just be opening it
and holding it the same way
528
00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:46,072
I would for Counselor Mackey,
a student, or anyone else.
529
00:20:46,245 --> 00:20:47,486
Somebody's going to have
to open the door,
530
00:20:47,663 --> 00:20:52,328
or we could die out here.
531
00:20:52,501 --> 00:20:57,963
♪♪
532
00:20:58,132 --> 00:21:03,719
♪ With a little love
and some tenderness ♪
533
00:21:03,888 --> 00:21:09,725
♪ We'll walk upon the water
We'll rise above the mess ♪
534
00:21:09,894 --> 00:21:12,728
♪ We'll take the world together ♪
535
00:21:12,897 --> 00:21:15,935
♪ We'll take them by the hand ♪
[ Missile whistling ]
536
00:21:16,108 --> 00:21:21,570
♪ 'Cause I've got
a hand for you ♪
537
00:21:21,739 --> 00:21:26,530
♪ 'Cause I wanna run with you ♪
538
00:21:26,702 --> 00:21:29,160
♪ Yesterday ♪
539
00:21:29,330 --> 00:21:32,914
♪ I saw you standing there ♪
540
00:21:33,083 --> 00:21:35,700
♪ Your head was down,
your eyes were red ♪
541
00:21:35,878 --> 00:21:37,790
♪ No comb had touched
your hair ♪
542
00:21:37,963 --> 00:21:43,630
♪ I said get up,
and let me see you smile ♪
543
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:46,637
♪ We'll take a walk together ♪
544
00:21:46,806 --> 00:21:49,389
♪ Walk the road a while ♪
545
00:21:49,439 --> 00:21:53,989
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