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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:08,592 --> 00:00:11,380 ♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time ♪ 2 00:00:11,553 --> 00:00:13,169 ♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪ 3 00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:15,134 ♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪ 4 00:00:15,307 --> 00:00:18,345 ♪ Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪ 5 00:00:18,519 --> 00:00:20,055 ♪ Ample parking day or night ♪ 6 00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:22,016 ♪ People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor!" ♪ 7 00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,431 ♪ Heading on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind ♪ 8 00:00:24,608 --> 00:00:28,352 ♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪ 9 00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:32,148 ♪ Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine ♪ 10 00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:38,285 All right, everyone. Listen up. 11 00:00:38,455 --> 00:00:40,162 Today we're going to have a performance 12 00:00:40,332 --> 00:00:41,868 by one of our students who has written a song. 13 00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:43,704 The song is about his feelings 14 00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:46,540 towards the current political climate with North Korea. 15 00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:48,670 Put your hands together for Tweek. 16 00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:51,628 [Applause ] 17 00:00:55,514 --> 00:00:56,379 [ Piano keys clanging ] 18 00:00:56,557 --> 00:01:01,177 [ Screaming ] 19 00:01:01,353 --> 00:01:03,094 We're all gonna die! 20 00:01:03,272 --> 00:01:07,232 They have nuclear missiles! Aah! Aah! 21 00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:10,109 Why are you just sitting there doing nothing?! 22 00:01:10,279 --> 00:01:11,520 we have to get out of here! 23 00:01:11,697 --> 00:01:13,188 North Korea wants to kill us all 24 00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:15,231 and our president keeps making it worse! 25 00:01:15,409 --> 00:01:18,152 Why are you all just sitting there?! 26 00:01:18,328 --> 00:01:21,537 Why are you all acting like nothing's wrong?! 27 00:01:21,707 --> 00:01:25,576 North Korea is going to bomb us! We are all dead! 28 00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:30,042 We have to do something! Do something! Do something! 29 00:01:30,215 --> 00:01:32,958 [ Screams ] 30 00:01:33,135 --> 00:01:34,967 All right, neXt up we have Hannah Williams 31 00:01:35,137 --> 00:01:36,878 with her rendition of "Wheels on the Bus." 32 00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:42,884 [ Crying ] ♪ The wheels on the bus go round and round ♪ 33 00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:47,688 Dude, Craig, you've got to get Tweek to get ahold of himself. 34 00:01:47,858 --> 00:01:49,440 He's freaking everybody out at school. 35 00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:52,353 - What am I supposed to do? - He's your boyfriend, dude. 36 00:01:52,529 --> 00:01:54,191 He's not gonna listen to me. 37 00:01:54,364 --> 00:01:56,196 He never does when he's emotional. 38 00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:57,982 Craig, let me tell you about relationships, okay? 39 00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:00,277 If you don't have some fuckin' balls, 40 00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:01,069 you're not going to get anywhere. 41 00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:02,703 Doesn't matter if they're gay balls or straight balls, 42 00:02:02,873 --> 00:02:04,830 if you don't take control of your side of a relationship, 43 00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:06,957 - you'll get walked all over... - Hey, babe. How you doing? 44 00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:08,493 Oh, hey, baby. What's going on? 45 00:02:11,548 --> 00:02:13,790 - We still on for recess? - Yup, I'll be there. 46 00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:14,957 'Kay, babe. Love you. 47 00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:19,178 I thought you said you broke up with Heidi. 48 00:02:19,348 --> 00:02:20,964 I decided to give her one more chance. 49 00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:22,757 But you said she was mentally abusive. 50 00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:24,095 She is mentally abusive. 51 00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:25,851 So then why did you take her back? 52 00:02:26,021 --> 00:02:27,512 Because she said she was gonna kill herself. 53 00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:29,430 All right, guys? There. 54 00:02:29,608 --> 00:02:30,644 I broke up with her, and she called me, being all like, 55 00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:32,308 "I can't live without you. 56 00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:33,943 I'm scared what I'm gonna do to myself. Oh, God." 57 00:02:34,112 --> 00:02:36,695 The bitch is crazy. What am I supposed to do? 58 00:02:36,865 --> 00:02:39,608 [ Nervously muttering ] 59 00:02:39,785 --> 00:02:40,901 [ Locker door slams ] Aah! 60 00:02:41,078 --> 00:02:43,115 Tweek. Aah! 61 00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:44,904 Dude, come on. You got to settle down. 62 00:02:45,082 --> 00:02:46,914 I can't settle down! We're all gonna die! 63 00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:49,167 We're not all gonna die. You're overreacting. 64 00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:51,453 Everything's fine, okay? [ Cellphone pings ] 65 00:02:51,630 --> 00:02:53,371 Oh, God! The president just tweeted 66 00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:55,665 that North Korea doesn't have the guts to attack us! 67 00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,549 Why would he say that?! He's making everything worse! 68 00:02:57,719 --> 00:02:59,085 - Tweek... - But North Koreans are gonna think 69 00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:00,503 we all agree with the president! 70 00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,765 Okay, so how about you write your congressman a letter. 71 00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:06,267 That won't help anything! North Korea wants us dead! 72 00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:08,143 Okay, so write a letter to the North Koreans. 73 00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:09,645 I can't write in Korean 74 00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:11,522 and they all think we're war-hungry anyway! 75 00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:13,900 Okay, well, then why don't you just send something nice 76 00:03:14,069 --> 00:03:15,355 to the North Koreans. [ Groans ] 77 00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,361 It'll make you feel better, babe. 78 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:19,739 - Send something like what?! - I dunno, like, 79 00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:21,274 make them some croissants or something. 80 00:03:21,451 --> 00:03:23,067 I don't know how to make croissants! 81 00:03:23,245 --> 00:03:25,032 Well, what do you know how to make? 82 00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:28,323 Mm... cupcakes! 83 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,492 All right, go home and make some cupcakes, honey. 84 00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:32,001 Okay! 85 00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:35,872 - Hey, Stan? - Yeah? 86 00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,631 Can I talk to you about Eric? 87 00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:39,337 Cartman? Okay... 88 00:03:39,511 --> 00:03:40,752 I just wanna make sure he's all right. 89 00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:42,420 What do you mean? 90 00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:44,884 I don't even know if I should be saying this but... 91 00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,721 - Eric said he was thinking about killing himself. - What? 92 00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:51,137 We broke up, and he called saying he was about to do it. 93 00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:53,306 I'm still really scared for him. 94 00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:55,770 Wait, Cartman said he was gonna kill himself? 95 00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:57,936 I'll send you the voicemail if you promise to keep it private. 96 00:03:58,113 --> 00:03:59,354 Totally. 97 00:03:59,531 --> 00:04:02,865 [ Laughter ] Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh. 98 00:04:03,034 --> 00:04:04,696 Cartman: You have to take me back! You have to! 99 00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:06,532 I'm gonna kill myself, Heidi! 100 00:04:06,705 --> 00:04:08,617 [ Laughter ] 101 00:04:08,790 --> 00:04:10,622 I'll kill myself, and then you'll be sorry! 102 00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:13,079 You'll wish you could have me back, but I'll be dead! 103 00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,836 [ Laughter ] 104 00:04:16,006 --> 00:04:18,339 Please, Heidi! Please! 105 00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:20,215 Okay, okay. 106 00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:21,796 Really cool listening to people's private voicemails. 107 00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:23,336 You sound like a dying pig. 108 00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:25,345 [ Laughter ] 109 00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:28,178 That's great! I'm glad you guys think suicide is so funny! 110 00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:31,264 [ Laughter ] 111 00:04:34,483 --> 00:04:42,607 ♪♪ 112 00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:50,702 ♪♪ 113 00:04:50,874 --> 00:04:57,121 ♪♪ 114 00:04:57,506 --> 00:04:58,667 [ Knocking ] 115 00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:01,257 Entrée. 116 00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:06,387 Yes, Eric. How can I help you? 117 00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:08,218 I don't think kids at this school 118 00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:10,633 take suicide seriously enough and we need to raise awareness. 119 00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,393 Well, unfortunately this week 120 00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:14,144 is Distracted Driving Awareness Week at school, 121 00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:15,771 so you might have a hard time. 122 00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:18,274 Distracted driving? Who gives a shit about that? 123 00:05:18,443 --> 00:05:19,775 A lot of people. 124 00:05:19,945 --> 00:05:21,402 There's more deaths now because of people 125 00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:22,812 on their phones while driving than ever before. 126 00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:25,026 PC Principal, someone's life is at stake. 127 00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,613 If I have to compete with distracted driving, 128 00:05:27,786 --> 00:05:28,993 then that's what I'll do. 129 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,278 ♪♪ 130 00:05:31,331 --> 00:05:33,493 [ Nervous jittering ] 131 00:05:38,630 --> 00:05:40,838 Huh? Oh! 132 00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:43,294 A young homosexual boy known only as Tweek 133 00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:45,505 has touched the hearts of many 134 00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:48,422 by sending cupcakes to the North Korean government. 135 00:05:48,598 --> 00:05:50,260 The little rascal apparently made a dent 136 00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:51,924 with the North Korean dictator, 137 00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:54,344 who is said to have loved the cupcakes so much 138 00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:56,683 that he is started to make his own... 139 00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:58,598 Oh! Ahh. [ Cellphone pings ] 140 00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:00,016 Huh?! 141 00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:02,856 "U.S. President responds to cupcakes..." 142 00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,645 The human interest cupcake story 143 00:06:04,823 --> 00:06:06,940 has apparently been heard by the president. 144 00:06:07,117 --> 00:06:09,074 Just moments ago, the president tweeted, 145 00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:10,405 "I know that kid Tweek. 146 00:06:10,579 --> 00:06:13,117 He's fucking with you, North Korea. Get a clue. 147 00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:15,577 I'll bet he took a dump in the batter." 148 00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:19,039 [ Screams ] What?! Why would he say that?! 149 00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:20,419 Tweek, calm down. 150 00:06:20,589 --> 00:06:22,922 The president! He tweeted about me! 151 00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,627 Why would he do that?! Did you see that?! 152 00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:26,793 Yes, I did see that. 153 00:06:26,970 --> 00:06:28,927 So I went and got you something to make things better. 154 00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:31,180 - What?! - It's a fidget spinner. 155 00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:34,558 It's supposed to help with anxiety. See? 156 00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:37,721 A fidget spinner?! Did you read what the president tweeted?! 157 00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:40,561 [ Cellphone pings ] Woman: The president of the United States 158 00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,396 just tweeted again, this time saying... 159 00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:46,153 "I hope all children ofAmerica will stand with Tweek in saying, 160 00:06:46,323 --> 00:06:48,485 'Go ahead and bomb us, Kim Jong Dong, 161 00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:49,774 we fucking dare you!"' 162 00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:51,613 [ Screams ] 163 00:06:55,165 --> 00:06:57,373 Hey, guys. Take a minute to read about distracted driving? 164 00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:58,749 Talk to all the grownups you know 165 00:06:58,919 --> 00:06:59,909 about staying off their mobile devices 166 00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:00,997 when they get behind the wheel. 167 00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:02,287 Hey, guys... got a second to help 168 00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:03,329 stop distracted driving? 169 00:07:03,506 --> 00:07:04,872 - Thanks. - Hey, guys... 170 00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:06,962 [ Music playing over intercom ] 171 00:07:07,135 --> 00:07:08,922 Cartman: Hey, guys, let's a take a minute 172 00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,802 and talk about suicide prevention. 173 00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:13,009 There's probably someone right now at this school 174 00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:15,550 thinking about killing himself, and it's not funny. 175 00:07:15,727 --> 00:07:18,595 You better take it serious or he might actually do it. 176 00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:21,185 ♪ I've been feelin' sad, I've been bein' sad ♪ 177 00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:23,520 ♪ Can't talk to my mom, don't even have a dad ♪ 178 00:07:23,693 --> 00:07:25,980 ♪ I can't go on, what is living for? ♪ 179 00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:27,941 ♪ My heart screams "I don't wanna live no more" ♪ 180 00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:30,197 ♪ Eric, we don't want you to die ♪ 181 00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:32,359 ♪ Eric, give life a try ♪ 182 00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:34,618 ♪ Eric, we don't want you to die ♪ 183 00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:36,700 ♪ Eric, oh, God, no, Eric ♪ 184 00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:40,662 [ Echoing ] I don't wanna live no more! 185 00:07:40,835 --> 00:07:43,623 ♪ But Eric, we don't want you die ♪ 186 00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:45,754 ♪ You're so cool, we'd be sad at school ♪ 187 00:07:45,924 --> 00:07:48,132 ♪ Yeah, but you guys, you don't understand ♪ 188 00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:50,668 ♪ With my girlfriend, it's like I'm living in quicksand ♪ 189 00:07:50,845 --> 00:07:52,962 ♪ Conflicting thoughts, I need a battered wives' shelter ♪ 190 00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:55,347 ♪ my girlfriend is messed up, but all I wanna do is help her ♪ 191 00:07:55,517 --> 00:07:57,349 ♪ I'm suffocating, I'm drowning in sorrow ♪ 192 00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,761 ♪ Gonna kill myself prob'ly around 2:30 tomorrow ♪ 193 00:07:59,938 --> 00:08:02,430 ♪ But, Eric, we don't want you to die ♪ 194 00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:05,691 ♪ Eric, give life a try ♪ Everybody! 195 00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:07,271 ♪ Eric, we don't want you to die ♪ 196 00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,732 ♪ Eric, oh, God, no, Eric ♪ But it's so hard! 197 00:08:09,906 --> 00:08:12,193 ♪ Eric, we don't want you to die ♪ 198 00:08:12,367 --> 00:08:14,450 Only you guys can make a difference. 199 00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:17,157 I don't care if you're black, white, gay, straight or trans, 200 00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:18,662 I am going to kill myself 201 00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,824 unless you all start taking it seriously. 202 00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:24,210 ♪ Eric, please don't die... ♪ 203 00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,297 Distracted driving my asshole. 204 00:08:31,803 --> 00:08:34,170 ♪♪ 205 00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:37,840 [ Nervous jittering ] 206 00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,475 - Hey, Tweek. - Aah! 207 00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:41,055 How's it going with the fidget spinner? 208 00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:44,347 - Great! - You seem a lot less anxious. 209 00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,231 Things are finally turning around 210 00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:47,642 for my little homosexual son. 211 00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:49,401 [ Loud blast in distance ] 212 00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:51,938 - What is that?! - I'm not sure. 213 00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:58,448 Aah! Aah! 214 00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,373 [ Screams ] 215 00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:06,501 Man: Yet no agreement has been reached 216 00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,253 between the parties involved. 217 00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:10,881 Breaking news now out of Colorado, 218 00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:13,464 where the North Koreans appear to have fired a missile 219 00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:15,047 over Tweek's house. - [ Screams ] 220 00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:16,837 Tweek, of course, the young boy 221 00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:18,881 who got the attention of Kim Jong Un last week. 222 00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:20,675 The news media in North Korea 223 00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:23,185 is calling the missile test a victory for its people. 224 00:09:23,354 --> 00:09:24,936 [ Speaking in Korean ] 225 00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:27,814 Translator: Today the great country of North Korea... 226 00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:30,818 has proven its determination and fortitude... 227 00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:34,446 by successfully firing a missile over Tweek's house. 228 00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:36,198 - Perhaps now Tweek... - Oh, my God. Oh, my God. 229 00:09:36,367 --> 00:09:37,528 Why's this happening to me?! 230 00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:39,443 They have to know this isn't my fault! 231 00:09:39,621 --> 00:09:41,658 In response to the North Korean test, 232 00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:43,493 the president of the United States 233 00:09:43,666 --> 00:09:45,282 has just tweeted this statement... 234 00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:47,497 "You really think Tweek is scared? 235 00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:50,037 Tweek will single handedly go to North Korea 236 00:09:50,215 --> 00:09:52,878 and fuck all you slanty eyed bitches doggy style. 237 00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:55,839 What?! Why would he say that?! 238 00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:57,628 Man: The president also tweeted... 239 00:09:57,806 --> 00:10:00,014 "If you even think Tweek is worried about 240 00:10:00,183 --> 00:10:02,345 a bunch of dipshit poor ass third world rice pickers, 241 00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:03,726 think again." 242 00:10:03,895 --> 00:10:06,103 Oh, my God! What is he doing?! 243 00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,889 - Tweek, Tweek. Calm down! - Why won't he just stop?! Why? 244 00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,933 Tweek! Tweek, h-here's your fidget spinner! 245 00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:12,352 Why does he keep making it worse?! 246 00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:13,770 Your fidget spinner, Tweek! Come on, son! 247 00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,438 Aah! 248 00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:17,277 Focus on the fidget spinner. 249 00:10:19,702 --> 00:10:24,322 ♪♪ 250 00:10:24,499 --> 00:10:27,162 Oh, geez, looks like North Korea launched another missile. 251 00:10:27,335 --> 00:10:29,873 Oh, really, like another test? Where are you looking? 252 00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:31,503 I'm on Drudge. 253 00:10:31,673 --> 00:10:33,084 You see what the president tweeted about it? 254 00:10:33,258 --> 00:10:35,170 - No, what'd he say? - The president tweeted 255 00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:36,550 "North Korea is the butthole ofAsia and... 256 00:10:36,719 --> 00:10:38,255 Innocent child! 257 00:10:38,429 --> 00:10:39,169 Aah! [ Tires screech ] 258 00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:41,009 Aah! 259 00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:44,391 [ Glass shatters, body thuds in slow motion ] 260 00:10:44,561 --> 00:10:46,644 [ Splattering ] 261 00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:07,831 [ Crying ] I know. I know, it's so sad. 262 00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:13,541 Well, how nice. That's a little more like it. 263 00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:16,048 Well, guys, what happened? Change of heart? 264 00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:17,048 Yeah, you didn't hear? 265 00:11:17,218 --> 00:11:20,086 Gary Borkovec got ran over by a distracted driver. 266 00:11:20,263 --> 00:11:22,505 What?! Gary Borkovec? Is he dead? 267 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,093 Yeah, dude, he's dead. 268 00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:25,428 Oh, that son of a bitch. 269 00:11:25,602 --> 00:11:27,013 I'm gonna talk to the principal! 270 00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:28,644 Put down the candle, Kenny! 271 00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:30,679 Like you ever gave a shit about Gary Borkovec! 272 00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,894 [ Knocking ] 273 00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:35,684 Entrée vous. 274 00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:37,899 PC Principal, I'm trying to raise suicide awareness, 275 00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:39,563 but everyone's preoccupied 276 00:11:39,741 --> 00:11:41,653 with this "don't be on your phone when driving" crap. 277 00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:43,658 Gary Borkovec was a good student. 278 00:11:43,828 --> 00:11:45,160 He didn't deserve to be taken away 279 00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:46,662 by someone not paying attention to the road. 280 00:11:46,831 --> 00:11:49,073 Yes, but Gary Borkovec is already dead. 281 00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:50,912 There's nothing we can do for him. 282 00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:53,077 Students need to focus on people thinking about dying. 283 00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,337 I don't know what more you want from me, bro. 284 00:11:55,506 --> 00:11:57,964 I can't just get people to care with a stupid rap song. 285 00:11:58,134 --> 00:12:00,046 I need a full orchestra... woodwinds, strings... 286 00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:01,677 I need black people in white robes, 287 00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,087 white people in black robes, 288 00:12:03,264 --> 00:12:05,472 and a thousand doves to release into the air. 289 00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:10,262 I can give you two student volunteers and one pigeon. 290 00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:12,896 Do you have any idea how serious this is? 291 00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,807 As someone who deals with suicidal thoughts, 292 00:12:14,984 --> 00:12:17,146 I cannot believe the lack of concern at this school! 293 00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:19,186 Maybe I should just take the awareness of my suicide 294 00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:20,650 out to the public on the streets! 295 00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:21,984 Maybe you should. 296 00:12:22,158 --> 00:12:23,820 Maybe I will! 297 00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:26,701 - Maybe you should. - Maybe I will! 298 00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:32,453 [ Screams ] 299 00:12:32,627 --> 00:12:34,789 Ugh. [ Sighs ] 300 00:12:34,963 --> 00:12:36,079 Hey, Tweek. 301 00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:37,997 Look at what the president tweeted now! 302 00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:39,381 What time is it, dude? 303 00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:41,507 Just read it! 304 00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:44,716 "North Korea doesn't have the balls to attack Tweek. 305 00:12:44,889 --> 00:12:46,926 They have little tiny rice balls." 306 00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:50,059 They're gonna get me, Craig! Look at what's on CNN! 307 00:12:50,228 --> 00:12:51,810 And the President's tweets have certainly caught 308 00:12:51,980 --> 00:12:53,812 the attention of North Korea, 309 00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,598 who have been spending the past several days 310 00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:58,392 viewing possible targets for a nuclear strike 311 00:12:58,569 --> 00:13:00,231 if war were to break out... 312 00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:02,522 [ Screams ] What am I gonna do?! 313 00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:04,315 You gotta calm down. 314 00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:05,778 How am I supposed to calm down?! 315 00:13:05,952 --> 00:13:07,363 North Korea is gonna get me! 316 00:13:07,537 --> 00:13:08,994 - They're gonna get me! - Tweek. Tweek. Tweek. 317 00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:10,574 Let's think this through logically. 318 00:13:10,748 --> 00:13:13,286 North Korea isn't going to attack anyone, okay? 319 00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:14,700 They're not going to start a war they can't win. 320 00:13:14,877 --> 00:13:15,742 Okay? 321 00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:17,252 - But, Craig, I... - Tweek. 322 00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:19,254 You have to stop thinking about it. 323 00:13:19,424 --> 00:13:21,586 Tell you what, we're gonna go somewhere fun 324 00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:22,840 and make you feel better. 325 00:13:23,011 --> 00:13:24,377 [ Bell dings ] 326 00:13:24,554 --> 00:13:26,591 Give a minute of your time for suicide awareness? 327 00:13:26,764 --> 00:13:28,050 Suicide is serious. 328 00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:30,136 Help tell people like Kyle it's not a joke. 329 00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:32,142 Hey, good for you guys, trying to help. 330 00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:33,803 Yeah, make sure everyone you know gets involved 331 00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,346 or else I'm gonna do it. 332 00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:37,059 We're getting a lot of attention, Eric. 333 00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:38,815 Our website's already full of kids 334 00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:39,941 saying they feel the same way as you 335 00:13:40,111 --> 00:13:41,352 and want to get help. 336 00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:43,065 They want to get help? For what? 337 00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:46,073 For wanting to take their own lives. 338 00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:48,450 No, this is about me killing myself. 339 00:13:48,619 --> 00:13:51,236 But, babe, there's a lot of kids who feel the same way you do. 340 00:13:51,414 --> 00:13:53,201 They're full of shit, Heidi. 341 00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:54,910 They're just trying to get attention. 342 00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:57,542 What, are you actually talking online to these asswipes?! 343 00:13:57,712 --> 00:13:59,999 I thought this was about raising awareness and helping people. 344 00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:01,630 So you're just gonna e-mail 345 00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:02,880 with every every guy who has a dick and a deathwish? 346 00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:04,292 Are we just your type? 347 00:14:04,469 --> 00:14:06,586 - Eric, come on. - No, look, Heidi. 348 00:14:06,763 --> 00:14:08,504 I'm sorry, but you're the one who started all this 349 00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:10,047 by telling everybody that I was suicidal. 350 00:14:10,224 --> 00:14:11,431 Okay? 351 00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:13,183 Now I'm under a lot of pressure to do it. 352 00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,140 So the only option I have is to make sure 353 00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:17,305 that suicide prevention becomes this entire town's 354 00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:18,848 number-one priority! 355 00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:20,232 Oh, God, did you see 356 00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:21,391 what the President said about Asians now? 357 00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:22,685 Look out! 358 00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:25,104 [ Screams ] 359 00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:28,820 Oh, are you freakin' serious? 360 00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:32,862 [ Riders scream in distance ] 361 00:14:33,039 --> 00:14:36,532 Okay, babe, what do you wanna ride first? 362 00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:38,917 Ugh! What are we doing here, Craig? 363 00:14:39,087 --> 00:14:41,500 We're gonna get your mind off politics and have some fun. 364 00:14:41,672 --> 00:14:43,755 Now, what's your favorite ride? 365 00:14:43,925 --> 00:14:45,791 The Ferris wheel! 366 00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:51,630 [ Laughs ] 367 00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:54,767 Isn't this lovely, Tweek? Just look at that view. 368 00:14:54,936 --> 00:14:55,926 [ Cellphone chimes ] 369 00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:57,094 [ Gasps ] Oh, God! 370 00:14:57,271 --> 00:14:58,387 Another tweet from the president! 371 00:14:58,564 --> 00:15:00,305 Oh, come on. 372 00:15:00,483 --> 00:15:03,476 "Why would the U.S. be scared of North Korea? 373 00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:05,770 Tweek is so not scared he's at an amusement park 374 00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:06,858 in Denver right now." 375 00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:08,272 [ Gasps ] Jesus Christ! 376 00:15:08,449 --> 00:15:09,781 We gotta get outta here! 377 00:15:09,951 --> 00:15:11,943 Tweek! Tweek, use your brain. 378 00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:14,533 North Korea isn't going to attack an amusement park. 379 00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,162 You're safer here than anywhere. 380 00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,208 Oh, geez. 381 00:15:20,378 --> 00:15:22,870 The president just called Kim Jong-un a fat midget. 382 00:15:23,047 --> 00:15:24,504 Oh, and now North Korea is saying that they're gonna... 383 00:15:24,674 --> 00:15:25,505 Dad, look out! 384 00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:26,506 Oh, shit! 385 00:15:26,676 --> 00:15:27,541 [ Woman screams ] 386 00:15:27,718 --> 00:15:28,299 [ Screams ] 387 00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:30,715 Ride attendant: All right, everyone, 388 00:15:30,888 --> 00:15:32,254 please wait for your bumper cars 389 00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:33,798 to come to a complete stop. 390 00:15:33,975 --> 00:15:35,182 We hope you enjoyed Crazy Cars... 391 00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:38,059 Mommy, look out! [ Screams ] 392 00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:45,059 Oh, my God, what is that?! 393 00:15:45,236 --> 00:15:46,568 What is that?! 394 00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:48,979 It's probably nothing. Everything's fine. 395 00:15:49,157 --> 00:15:50,739 Will you please stop saying that?! 396 00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:51,989 I can't take it! 397 00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:53,492 I'm trying to make you feel better. 398 00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:56,278 Well, maybe I don't wanna feel better right now! 399 00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:57,992 Okay, but think about that. 400 00:15:58,166 --> 00:15:59,532 That actually doesn't make any sense. 401 00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,416 Why do you have to be so logical?! 402 00:16:01,586 --> 00:16:03,327 I don't need you to problem-solve all the time, 403 00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:06,121 I need you to... Agh! I don't know! 404 00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:08,632 Tweek, honey, all week, you've been freaking out, 405 00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,417 and I've been the one forced to deal with it. 406 00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:11,961 You haven't been dealing with it, 407 00:16:12,138 --> 00:16:13,629 you've been trying to make it go away 408 00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:15,172 because my emotions are freaking you out! 409 00:16:15,349 --> 00:16:17,511 [ People scream ] 410 00:16:17,685 --> 00:16:19,927 Tweek, North Korea isn't bombing anyone. 411 00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:21,436 They would lose the support of China, 412 00:16:21,606 --> 00:16:22,596 - and that would be... - There you go again! 413 00:16:22,773 --> 00:16:23,934 Stop preaching facts to me! 414 00:16:24,108 --> 00:16:25,189 It's not what I need! 415 00:16:25,359 --> 00:16:27,316 Well, I'm sorry that I'm actually in control 416 00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:29,274 of my goddamn emotions, ya baby! 417 00:16:30,948 --> 00:16:32,735 Oh, see, now you made me lose control of my emotions. 418 00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:34,070 God damn it. 419 00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:37,452 [ Grumbling ] 420 00:16:37,622 --> 00:16:38,954 [ Screams ] 421 00:16:40,917 --> 00:16:43,000 [bell rings] 422 00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:47,333 Hey Craig, how come Tweek's not at school? 423 00:16:47,507 --> 00:16:48,543 How should I know? 424 00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:50,673 Uh-oh. Trouble in paradise? 425 00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:53,301 Look guys, Tweek doesn't want help, okay? 426 00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:55,588 He just wants to overreact. 427 00:16:55,765 --> 00:16:57,506 Henry: Hey, guys, could we have your attention? 428 00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,470 Tomorrow night, we'll be having a memorial service 429 00:16:59,644 --> 00:17:01,636 for all the students we've lost to distracted driving. 430 00:17:01,812 --> 00:17:03,303 We hope you can all bring your families. 431 00:17:03,481 --> 00:17:04,722 Cool, yeah. Hey, guys, and there's also 432 00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:06,390 gonna be a suicide awareness pot luck 433 00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:08,308 at 7:30 tomorrow night in the school gymnasium. 434 00:17:08,486 --> 00:17:09,852 We're gonna have lots of games and face painting, 435 00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,066 and what are you guys gonna have? 436 00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:13,947 We're gonna have some guest speakers 437 00:17:14,116 --> 00:17:14,947 and also provide grievance counselors 438 00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:16,779 for those who need it. 439 00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:18,535 Yeah, grievance counseling... that sounds super fun. 440 00:17:18,704 --> 00:17:19,694 Listen, guys, there's a very real chance 441 00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,534 I might actually do it right in front 442 00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:22,788 of everyone tomorrow, so you don't want to miss it. 443 00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:24,996 Suicide prevention pot luck, everybody. 444 00:17:25,169 --> 00:17:26,205 Eric, you need to stop. 445 00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:28,120 What they're doing is important. 446 00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:29,913 They're doing a memorial service with speeches and crying. 447 00:17:30,091 --> 00:17:31,332 What's that gonna solve? 448 00:17:31,509 --> 00:17:32,875 it's not about problem solving, Eric. 449 00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,338 It's about people getting together 450 00:17:34,512 --> 00:17:36,629 and feeling what they need to feel! 451 00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:39,014 People need help sorting out their emotions sometimes. 452 00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:41,140 And the best thing isn't always quick answers, 453 00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,097 But just being there, supporting each other 454 00:17:43,271 --> 00:17:45,103 And talking through those feelings. 455 00:17:45,273 --> 00:17:46,639 You are so up and down. 456 00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:48,398 I don't know what you want from me, Heidi! 457 00:17:48,568 --> 00:17:49,558 Come on. There has to be a way 458 00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,397 We can all work together, here. 459 00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:52,903 So, now you're on their side! 460 00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:55,314 Oh, my God, I'm seriously gonna do it right now! 461 00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:56,857 Eric! 462 00:17:59,161 --> 00:18:00,572 [ Door opens ] 463 00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:02,863 Tweek! What's going on? 464 00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:05,202 What? What do you mean what's going on?! 465 00:18:05,376 --> 00:18:07,208 The same shit that's been going on! 466 00:18:07,378 --> 00:18:08,789 Nothing's gotten any better?! 467 00:18:08,963 --> 00:18:10,920 Oh, my God, how does that make you feel? 468 00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:13,377 I feel scared! I feel alone! 469 00:18:13,551 --> 00:18:14,917 That must be horrible to feel that way! 470 00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,835 It must be hard for you to even think! 471 00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:18,970 It is! It's terrible! 472 00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:22,850 I bet it's terrible! What else are you feeling? 473 00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:24,726 Like I have no control over my life. 474 00:18:24,895 --> 00:18:26,807 Like I'm just a pawn in a big game. 475 00:18:26,981 --> 00:18:28,347 Oh, that's a terrifying thought. 476 00:18:28,524 --> 00:18:29,810 You must feel trapped. 477 00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:31,191 Yeah, like, trapped, 478 00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:32,851 But, like, completely unable to even move. 479 00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:34,565 Jesus! 480 00:18:34,739 --> 00:18:35,980 It's like there's no solution to any of this! 481 00:18:36,157 --> 00:18:37,739 What are you gonna do? What can you do? 482 00:18:37,908 --> 00:18:40,867 I don't know. It's... It's like maybe... 483 00:18:41,037 --> 00:18:42,403 Maybe I have to find a way 484 00:18:42,580 --> 00:18:44,572 to feel a little in charge of me again. 485 00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,285 That sounds so insurmountable, though. 486 00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:48,166 How would you even start? 487 00:18:48,336 --> 00:18:51,420 I don't know, but I-I gotta do something about this. 488 00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:53,546 There's gotta be a way I can... 489 00:19:01,724 --> 00:19:03,511 Thank you, Craig. 490 00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:06,847 I've got it. 491 00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:08,887 People aren't focused on the right thing. 492 00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:11,603 I know what I should do. 493 00:19:11,776 --> 00:19:15,065 All right, everyone, listen up. 494 00:19:15,237 --> 00:19:17,229 Tonight, one of our students has put together a song 495 00:19:17,406 --> 00:19:18,897 about a very important issue. 496 00:19:19,075 --> 00:19:20,862 It's a song about how there are certain times 497 00:19:21,035 --> 00:19:22,446 to not be on your phone. 498 00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:24,953 I hope you all listen carefully. 499 00:19:30,294 --> 00:19:35,210 [ Somber piano music plays ] 500 00:19:35,383 --> 00:19:37,796 ♪ People are dying ♪ 501 00:19:37,968 --> 00:19:40,585 ♪ The fault is our own ♪ 502 00:19:40,763 --> 00:19:43,255 ♪ You can do lots of damage ♪ 503 00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:45,719 ♪ When you're on your phone ♪ 504 00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:48,476 ♪ We all have to agree ♪ 505 00:19:48,646 --> 00:19:51,309 ♪ To change it somehow ♪ 506 00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:57,444 ♪ Let's all make a pledge to end it right now ♪ 507 00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:58,854 ♪ Put it down ♪ 508 00:19:59,031 --> 00:20:00,522 ♪ Don't be on your phone ♪ 509 00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,692 ♪ While being president ♪ 510 00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:04,154 ♪ Put it down ♪ 511 00:20:04,328 --> 00:20:05,864 ♪ You might do something dumb ♪ 512 00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:08,030 ♪ And cause an accident ♪ 513 00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:10,950 ♪ Let's all agree here today ♪ 514 00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:13,369 ♪ That if we're leader of the USA ♪ 515 00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,253 ♪ We'll put it down ♪ 516 00:20:15,423 --> 00:20:17,540 If at any point today, you're being a president, 517 00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:18,753 put down your mobile device. 518 00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:20,337 ♪ Put it down ♪ 519 00:20:20,511 --> 00:20:22,343 If I'm on the phone, I will not get behind 520 00:20:22,513 --> 00:20:24,129 the desk of an oval office. 521 00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:25,296 ♪ Put it down ♪ 522 00:20:25,474 --> 00:20:26,715 I'll take the pledge! 523 00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:27,973 I'll take the pledge! 524 00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:29,225 And I'll take the pledge. 525 00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:31,808 ♪ No one cares ♪ 526 00:20:31,981 --> 00:20:33,222 What's that? I was just elected president? 527 00:20:33,399 --> 00:20:35,140 Well, then, goodbye! 528 00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:38,936 ♪ Put it down if you're president today ♪ 529 00:20:39,113 --> 00:20:41,571 ♪ If you find yourself being president today ♪ 530 00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:44,700 Hey Brian, look! I was just elected president. 531 00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:46,701 That's great, Nancy. Now, put down your phone. 532 00:20:46,871 --> 00:20:48,282 Right! 533 00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:51,449 ♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah-ah-ah, put it down ♪ 534 00:20:51,625 --> 00:20:53,833 [ Rapping ] ♪ Give a standing ovation for suicide in our nation ♪ 535 00:20:54,003 --> 00:20:56,495 ♪ Or I will rip my own guts out without one hesitation ♪ 536 00:20:56,672 --> 00:20:57,628 ♪ Dedication, that's what it's taken ♪ 537 00:20:57,798 --> 00:20:58,754 ♪ To waken people to care ♪ 538 00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,085 ♪ And still my future's so hazy ♪ 539 00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,545 ♪ My girlfriend's making me crazy ♪ 540 00:21:01,719 --> 00:21:03,005 ♪ But still I'm working so hard ♪ 541 00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:04,920 ♪ You know, just trying to hold on ♪ 542 00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:06,963 ♪ Cuz I know that you don't miss me so much if I was gone ♪ 543 00:21:07,141 --> 00:21:08,427 ♪ And all the voices start solo ♪ 544 00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:09,762 ♪ But every day, I hear them grow ♪ 545 00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:10,971 ♪ Saying, Eric, don't do it ♪ 546 00:21:11,145 --> 00:21:12,932 ♪ Don't do it, nooooo ♪ 547 00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:15,062 ♪ Put it down ♪ 548 00:21:15,232 --> 00:21:18,475 ♪ Don't be on your phone while being president ♪ 549 00:21:18,652 --> 00:21:20,439 ♪ Put it down ♪ 550 00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:24,027 ♪ You might do something dumb and cause an accident ♪ 551 00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,817 ♪ We all agree here today ♪ 552 00:21:26,994 --> 00:21:29,361 ♪ That if we're leader of the USA ♪ 553 00:21:29,538 --> 00:21:32,030 ♪ We'll put it down ♪ 554 00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,668 ♪ Put it down ♪ 555 00:21:41,926 --> 00:21:43,588 I'm not gonna do it, you guys! 556 00:21:43,761 --> 00:21:45,172 It worked! I'm not gonna do it! 557 00:21:45,222 --> 00:21:49,772 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 42294

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