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1
00:00:08,592 --> 00:00:11,380
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time ♪
2
00:00:11,553 --> 00:00:13,169
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
3
00:00:13,347 --> 00:00:15,134
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
4
00:00:15,307 --> 00:00:18,345
♪ Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪
5
00:00:18,519 --> 00:00:20,055
♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
6
00:00:20,229 --> 00:00:22,016
♪ People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪
7
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,431
♪ Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
8
00:00:24,608 --> 00:00:28,352
♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
9
00:00:28,529 --> 00:00:32,148
♪ Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ♪
10
00:00:36,703 --> 00:00:38,285
All right, everyone.
Listen up.
11
00:00:38,455 --> 00:00:40,162
Today we're going to have
a performance
12
00:00:40,332 --> 00:00:41,868
by one of our students
who has written a song.
13
00:00:42,042 --> 00:00:43,704
The song is about his feelings
14
00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:46,540
towards the current political
climate with North Korea.
15
00:00:46,713 --> 00:00:48,670
Put your hands together
for Tweek.
16
00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:51,628
[Applause ]
17
00:00:55,514 --> 00:00:56,379
[ Piano keys clanging ]
18
00:00:56,557 --> 00:01:01,177
[ Screaming ]
19
00:01:01,353 --> 00:01:03,094
We're all gonna die!
20
00:01:03,272 --> 00:01:07,232
They have nuclear missiles!
Aah! Aah!
21
00:01:07,401 --> 00:01:10,109
Why are you just sitting there
doing nothing?!
22
00:01:10,279 --> 00:01:11,520
we have to get out of here!
23
00:01:11,697 --> 00:01:13,188
North Korea
wants to kill us all
24
00:01:13,365 --> 00:01:15,231
and our president
keeps making it worse!
25
00:01:15,409 --> 00:01:18,152
Why are you all
just sitting there?!
26
00:01:18,328 --> 00:01:21,537
Why are you all acting
like nothing's wrong?!
27
00:01:21,707 --> 00:01:25,576
North Korea is going to bomb us!
We are all dead!
28
00:01:25,752 --> 00:01:30,042
We have to do something!
Do something! Do something!
29
00:01:30,215 --> 00:01:32,958
[ Screams ]
30
00:01:33,135 --> 00:01:34,967
All right, neXt up
we have Hannah Williams
31
00:01:35,137 --> 00:01:36,878
with her rendition
of "Wheels on the Bus."
32
00:01:39,766 --> 00:01:42,884
[ Crying ] ♪ The wheels on
the bus go round and round ♪
33
00:01:45,355 --> 00:01:47,688
Dude, Craig, you've got to get
Tweek to get ahold of himself.
34
00:01:47,858 --> 00:01:49,440
He's freaking everybody out
at school.
35
00:01:49,610 --> 00:01:52,353
- What am I supposed to do?
- He's your boyfriend, dude.
36
00:01:52,529 --> 00:01:54,191
He's not
gonna listen to me.
37
00:01:54,364 --> 00:01:56,196
He never does
when he's emotional.
38
00:01:56,366 --> 00:01:57,982
Craig, let me tell you
about relationships, okay?
39
00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:00,277
If you don't have
some fuckin' balls,
40
00:02:00,454 --> 00:02:01,069
you're not going to
get anywhere.
41
00:02:01,246 --> 00:02:02,703
Doesn't matter if they're
gay balls or straight balls,
42
00:02:02,873 --> 00:02:04,830
if you don't take control
of your side of a relationship,
43
00:02:05,000 --> 00:02:06,957
- you'll get walked all over...
- Hey, babe. How you doing?
44
00:02:07,127 --> 00:02:08,493
Oh, hey, baby.
What's going on?
45
00:02:11,548 --> 00:02:13,790
- We still on for recess?
- Yup, I'll be there.
46
00:02:13,967 --> 00:02:14,957
'Kay, babe.
Love you.
47
00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:19,178
I thought you said
you broke up with Heidi.
48
00:02:19,348 --> 00:02:20,964
I decided to give her
one more chance.
49
00:02:21,141 --> 00:02:22,757
But you said
she was mentally abusive.
50
00:02:22,934 --> 00:02:24,095
She is mentally abusive.
51
00:02:24,269 --> 00:02:25,851
So then why did you
take her back?
52
00:02:26,021 --> 00:02:27,512
Because she said
she was gonna kill herself.
53
00:02:27,689 --> 00:02:29,430
All right, guys? There.
54
00:02:29,608 --> 00:02:30,644
I broke up with her, and she
called me, being all like,
55
00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:32,308
"I can't live without you.
56
00:02:32,486 --> 00:02:33,943
I'm scared what I'm gonna do to
myself. Oh, God."
57
00:02:34,112 --> 00:02:36,695
The bitch is crazy.
What am I supposed to do?
58
00:02:36,865 --> 00:02:39,608
[ Nervously muttering ]
59
00:02:39,785 --> 00:02:40,901
[ Locker door slams ]
Aah!
60
00:02:41,078 --> 00:02:43,115
Tweek.
Aah!
61
00:02:43,288 --> 00:02:44,904
Dude, come on.
You got to settle down.
62
00:02:45,082 --> 00:02:46,914
I can't settle down!
We're all gonna die!
63
00:02:47,084 --> 00:02:49,167
We're not all gonna die.
You're overreacting.
64
00:02:49,336 --> 00:02:51,453
Everything's fine, okay?
[ Cellphone pings ]
65
00:02:51,630 --> 00:02:53,371
Oh, God!
The president just tweeted
66
00:02:53,548 --> 00:02:55,665
that North Korea doesn't have
the guts to attack us!
67
00:02:55,842 --> 00:02:57,549
Why would he say that?!
He's making everything worse!
68
00:02:57,719 --> 00:02:59,085
- Tweek...
- But North Koreans are gonna think
69
00:02:59,262 --> 00:03:00,503
we all agree
with the president!
70
00:03:00,681 --> 00:03:03,765
Okay, so how about you write
your congressman a letter.
71
00:03:03,934 --> 00:03:06,267
That won't help anything!
North Korea wants us dead!
72
00:03:06,436 --> 00:03:08,143
Okay, so write a letter
to the North Koreans.
73
00:03:08,313 --> 00:03:09,645
I can't write in Korean
74
00:03:09,815 --> 00:03:11,522
and they all think
we're war-hungry anyway!
75
00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:13,900
Okay, well, then why don't you
just send something nice
76
00:03:14,069 --> 00:03:15,355
to the North Koreans.
[ Groans ]
77
00:03:15,529 --> 00:03:17,361
It'll make you feel better,
babe.
78
00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:19,739
- Send something like what?!
- I dunno, like,
79
00:03:19,908 --> 00:03:21,274
make them some
croissants or something.
80
00:03:21,451 --> 00:03:23,067
I don't know
how to make croissants!
81
00:03:23,245 --> 00:03:25,032
Well,
what do you know how to make?
82
00:03:25,205 --> 00:03:28,323
Mm... cupcakes!
83
00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,492
All right, go home
and make some cupcakes, honey.
84
00:03:30,669 --> 00:03:32,001
Okay!
85
00:03:33,880 --> 00:03:35,872
- Hey, Stan?
- Yeah?
86
00:03:36,049 --> 00:03:37,631
Can I talk to you
about Eric?
87
00:03:37,801 --> 00:03:39,337
Cartman? Okay...
88
00:03:39,511 --> 00:03:40,752
I just wanna make sure
he's all right.
89
00:03:40,929 --> 00:03:42,420
What do you mean?
90
00:03:42,597 --> 00:03:44,884
I don't even know if
I should be saying this but...
91
00:03:45,058 --> 00:03:47,721
- Eric said he was thinking about killing himself.
- What?
92
00:03:47,894 --> 00:03:51,137
We broke up, and he called
saying he was about to do it.
93
00:03:51,314 --> 00:03:53,306
I'm still
really scared for him.
94
00:03:53,483 --> 00:03:55,770
Wait, Cartman said
he was gonna kill himself?
95
00:03:55,944 --> 00:03:57,936
I'll send you the voicemail if
you promise to keep it private.
96
00:03:58,113 --> 00:03:59,354
Totally.
97
00:03:59,531 --> 00:04:02,865
[ Laughter ]
Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
98
00:04:03,034 --> 00:04:04,696
Cartman: You have to take me
back! You have to!
99
00:04:04,870 --> 00:04:06,532
I'm gonna kill myself,
Heidi!
100
00:04:06,705 --> 00:04:08,617
[ Laughter ]
101
00:04:08,790 --> 00:04:10,622
I'll kill myself,
and then you'll be sorry!
102
00:04:10,792 --> 00:04:13,079
You'll wish you could have me
back, but I'll be dead!
103
00:04:13,253 --> 00:04:15,836
[ Laughter ]
104
00:04:16,006 --> 00:04:18,339
Please, Heidi! Please!
105
00:04:18,508 --> 00:04:20,215
Okay, okay.
106
00:04:20,385 --> 00:04:21,796
Really cool listening
to people's private voicemails.
107
00:04:21,970 --> 00:04:23,336
You sound like
a dying pig.
108
00:04:23,513 --> 00:04:25,345
[ Laughter ]
109
00:04:25,515 --> 00:04:28,178
That's great! I'm glad you guys
think suicide is so funny!
110
00:04:28,351 --> 00:04:31,264
[ Laughter ]
111
00:04:34,483 --> 00:04:42,607
♪♪
112
00:04:42,783 --> 00:04:50,702
♪♪
113
00:04:50,874 --> 00:04:57,121
♪♪
114
00:04:57,506 --> 00:04:58,667
[ Knocking ]
115
00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:01,257
Entrée.
116
00:05:04,805 --> 00:05:06,387
Yes, Eric.
How can I help you?
117
00:05:06,556 --> 00:05:08,218
I don't think
kids at this school
118
00:05:08,391 --> 00:05:10,633
take suicide seriously enough
and we need to raise awareness.
119
00:05:10,811 --> 00:05:12,393
Well,
unfortunately this week
120
00:05:12,562 --> 00:05:14,144
is Distracted Driving
Awareness Week at school,
121
00:05:14,314 --> 00:05:15,771
so you might have
a hard time.
122
00:05:15,941 --> 00:05:18,274
Distracted driving?
Who gives a shit about that?
123
00:05:18,443 --> 00:05:19,775
A lot of people.
124
00:05:19,945 --> 00:05:21,402
There's more deaths now
because of people
125
00:05:21,571 --> 00:05:22,812
on their phones while driving
than ever before.
126
00:05:22,989 --> 00:05:25,026
PC Principal,
someone's life is at stake.
127
00:05:25,200 --> 00:05:27,613
If I have to compete
with distracted driving,
128
00:05:27,786 --> 00:05:28,993
then that's what I'll do.
129
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:30,278
♪♪
130
00:05:31,331 --> 00:05:33,493
[ Nervous jittering ]
131
00:05:38,630 --> 00:05:40,838
Huh? Oh!
132
00:05:41,007 --> 00:05:43,294
A young homosexual boy
known only as Tweek
133
00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:45,505
has touched
the hearts of many
134
00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:48,422
by sending cupcakes
to the North Korean government.
135
00:05:48,598 --> 00:05:50,260
The little rascal
apparently made a dent
136
00:05:50,433 --> 00:05:51,924
with the North Korean dictator,
137
00:05:52,102 --> 00:05:54,344
who is said to have loved
the cupcakes so much
138
00:05:54,521 --> 00:05:56,683
that he is started
to make his own...
139
00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:58,598
Oh! Ahh.
[ Cellphone pings ]
140
00:05:58,775 --> 00:06:00,016
Huh?!
141
00:06:00,193 --> 00:06:02,856
"U.S. President
responds to cupcakes..."
142
00:06:03,029 --> 00:06:04,645
The human interest
cupcake story
143
00:06:04,823 --> 00:06:06,940
has apparently been heard
by the president.
144
00:06:07,117 --> 00:06:09,074
Just moments ago,
the president tweeted,
145
00:06:09,244 --> 00:06:10,405
"I know that kid Tweek.
146
00:06:10,579 --> 00:06:13,117
He's fucking with you,
North Korea. Get a clue.
147
00:06:13,290 --> 00:06:15,577
I'll bet he took a dump
in the batter."
148
00:06:15,750 --> 00:06:19,039
[ Screams ]
What?! Why would he say that?!
149
00:06:19,212 --> 00:06:20,419
Tweek, calm down.
150
00:06:20,589 --> 00:06:22,922
The president!
He tweeted about me!
151
00:06:23,091 --> 00:06:24,627
Why would he do that?!
Did you see that?!
152
00:06:24,801 --> 00:06:26,793
Yes, I did see that.
153
00:06:26,970 --> 00:06:28,927
So I went and got you something
to make things better.
154
00:06:29,097 --> 00:06:31,180
- What?!
- It's a fidget spinner.
155
00:06:31,349 --> 00:06:34,558
It's supposed to help
with anxiety. See?
156
00:06:34,728 --> 00:06:37,721
A fidget spinner?! Did you read
what the president tweeted?!
157
00:06:37,898 --> 00:06:40,561
[ Cellphone pings ]
Woman: The president of the United States
158
00:06:40,734 --> 00:06:42,396
just tweeted again,
this time saying...
159
00:06:42,569 --> 00:06:46,153
"I hope all children ofAmerica
will stand with Tweek in saying,
160
00:06:46,323 --> 00:06:48,485
'Go ahead and bomb us,
Kim Jong Dong,
161
00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:49,774
we fucking dare you!"'
162
00:06:49,951 --> 00:06:51,613
[ Screams ]
163
00:06:55,165 --> 00:06:57,373
Hey, guys. Take a minute to read
about distracted driving?
164
00:06:57,542 --> 00:06:58,749
Talk to
all the grownups you know
165
00:06:58,919 --> 00:06:59,909
about staying off their
mobile devices
166
00:07:00,086 --> 00:07:00,997
when they get behind
the wheel.
167
00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:02,287
Hey, guys...
got a second to help
168
00:07:02,464 --> 00:07:03,329
stop distracted driving?
169
00:07:03,506 --> 00:07:04,872
- Thanks.
- Hey, guys...
170
00:07:05,050 --> 00:07:06,962
[ Music playing
over intercom ]
171
00:07:07,135 --> 00:07:08,922
Cartman: Hey, guys,
let's a take a minute
172
00:07:09,095 --> 00:07:10,802
and talk about
suicide prevention.
173
00:07:10,972 --> 00:07:13,009
There's probably someone
right now at this school
174
00:07:13,183 --> 00:07:15,550
thinking about killing himself,
and it's not funny.
175
00:07:15,727 --> 00:07:18,595
You better take it serious
or he might actually do it.
176
00:07:18,772 --> 00:07:21,185
♪ I've been feelin' sad,
I've been bein' sad ♪
177
00:07:21,358 --> 00:07:23,520
♪ Can't talk to my mom,
don't even have a dad ♪
178
00:07:23,693 --> 00:07:25,980
♪ I can't go on,
what is living for? ♪
179
00:07:26,154 --> 00:07:27,941
♪ My heart screams
"I don't wanna live no more" ♪
180
00:07:28,114 --> 00:07:30,197
♪ Eric,
we don't want you to die ♪
181
00:07:30,367 --> 00:07:32,359
♪ Eric, give life a try ♪
182
00:07:32,535 --> 00:07:34,618
♪ Eric,
we don't want you to die ♪
183
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:36,700
♪ Eric, oh, God, no, Eric ♪
184
00:07:36,873 --> 00:07:40,662
[ Echoing ]
I don't wanna live no more!
185
00:07:40,835 --> 00:07:43,623
♪ But Eric,
we don't want you die ♪
186
00:07:43,797 --> 00:07:45,754
♪ You're so cool,
we'd be sad at school ♪
187
00:07:45,924 --> 00:07:48,132
♪ Yeah, but you guys,
you don't understand ♪
188
00:07:48,301 --> 00:07:50,668
♪ With my girlfriend, it's
like I'm living in quicksand ♪
189
00:07:50,845 --> 00:07:52,962
♪ Conflicting thoughts, I need
a battered wives' shelter ♪
190
00:07:53,139 --> 00:07:55,347
♪ my girlfriend is messed up,
but all I wanna do is help her ♪
191
00:07:55,517 --> 00:07:57,349
♪ I'm suffocating,
I'm drowning in sorrow ♪
192
00:07:57,519 --> 00:07:59,761
♪ Gonna kill myself prob'ly
around 2:30 tomorrow ♪
193
00:07:59,938 --> 00:08:02,430
♪ But, Eric,
we don't want you to die ♪
194
00:08:02,607 --> 00:08:05,691
♪ Eric, give life a try ♪
Everybody!
195
00:08:05,860 --> 00:08:07,271
♪ Eric,
we don't want you to die ♪
196
00:08:07,445 --> 00:08:09,732
♪ Eric, oh, God, no, Eric ♪
But it's so hard!
197
00:08:09,906 --> 00:08:12,193
♪ Eric,
we don't want you to die ♪
198
00:08:12,367 --> 00:08:14,450
Only you guys
can make a difference.
199
00:08:14,619 --> 00:08:17,157
I don't care if you're black,
white, gay, straight or trans,
200
00:08:17,330 --> 00:08:18,662
I am going to kill myself
201
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,824
unless you all
start taking it seriously.
202
00:08:21,001 --> 00:08:24,210
♪ Eric, please don't die... ♪
203
00:08:27,340 --> 00:08:29,297
Distracted driving
my asshole.
204
00:08:31,803 --> 00:08:34,170
♪♪
205
00:08:34,347 --> 00:08:37,840
[ Nervous jittering ]
206
00:08:38,018 --> 00:08:39,475
- Hey, Tweek.
- Aah!
207
00:08:39,644 --> 00:08:41,055
How's it going
with the fidget spinner?
208
00:08:41,229 --> 00:08:44,347
- Great!
- You seem a lot less anxious.
209
00:08:44,524 --> 00:08:46,231
Things are
finally turning around
210
00:08:46,401 --> 00:08:47,642
for my little
homosexual son.
211
00:08:47,819 --> 00:08:49,401
[ Loud blast in distance ]
212
00:08:49,571 --> 00:08:51,938
- What is that?!
- I'm not sure.
213
00:08:56,786 --> 00:08:58,448
Aah! Aah!
214
00:09:01,541 --> 00:09:03,373
[ Screams ]
215
00:09:04,794 --> 00:09:06,501
Man: Yet no agreement
has been reached
216
00:09:06,671 --> 00:09:08,253
between the parties involved.
217
00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:10,881
Breaking news now
out of Colorado,
218
00:09:11,051 --> 00:09:13,464
where the North Koreans
appear to have fired a missile
219
00:09:13,636 --> 00:09:15,047
over Tweek's house.
- [ Screams ]
220
00:09:15,221 --> 00:09:16,837
Tweek, of course,
the young boy
221
00:09:17,015 --> 00:09:18,881
who got the attention
of Kim Jong Un last week.
222
00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:20,675
The news media in North Korea
223
00:09:20,852 --> 00:09:23,185
is calling the missile test
a victory for its people.
224
00:09:23,354 --> 00:09:24,936
[ Speaking in Korean ]
225
00:09:25,106 --> 00:09:27,814
Translator: Today the great
country of North Korea...
226
00:09:27,984 --> 00:09:30,818
has proven its determination
and fortitude...
227
00:09:30,987 --> 00:09:34,446
by successfully firing a missile
over Tweek's house.
228
00:09:34,616 --> 00:09:36,198
- Perhaps now Tweek...
- Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
229
00:09:36,367 --> 00:09:37,528
Why's this happening to me?!
230
00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:39,443
They have to know
this isn't my fault!
231
00:09:39,621 --> 00:09:41,658
In response
to the North Korean test,
232
00:09:41,831 --> 00:09:43,493
the president
of the United States
233
00:09:43,666 --> 00:09:45,282
has just tweeted
this statement...
234
00:09:45,460 --> 00:09:47,497
"You really think
Tweek is scared?
235
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:50,037
Tweek will single handedly
go to North Korea
236
00:09:50,215 --> 00:09:52,878
and fuck all you slanty eyed
bitches doggy style.
237
00:09:53,051 --> 00:09:55,839
What?!
Why would he say that?!
238
00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:57,628
Man:
The president also tweeted...
239
00:09:57,806 --> 00:10:00,014
"If you even think Tweek
is worried about
240
00:10:00,183 --> 00:10:02,345
a bunch of dipshit poor ass
third world rice pickers,
241
00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:03,726
think again."
242
00:10:03,895 --> 00:10:06,103
Oh, my God!
What is he doing?!
243
00:10:06,272 --> 00:10:08,889
- Tweek, Tweek. Calm down!
- Why won't he just stop?! Why?
244
00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,933
Tweek! Tweek,
h-here's your fidget spinner!
245
00:10:11,111 --> 00:10:12,352
Why does he
keep making it worse?!
246
00:10:12,529 --> 00:10:13,770
Your fidget spinner, Tweek!
Come on, son!
247
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,438
Aah!
248
00:10:15,615 --> 00:10:17,277
Focus on
the fidget spinner.
249
00:10:19,702 --> 00:10:24,322
♪♪
250
00:10:24,499 --> 00:10:27,162
Oh, geez, looks like North Korea
launched another missile.
251
00:10:27,335 --> 00:10:29,873
Oh, really, like another test?
Where are you looking?
252
00:10:30,046 --> 00:10:31,503
I'm on Drudge.
253
00:10:31,673 --> 00:10:33,084
You see what the president
tweeted about it?
254
00:10:33,258 --> 00:10:35,170
- No, what'd he say?
- The president tweeted
255
00:10:35,343 --> 00:10:36,550
"North Korea
is the butthole ofAsia and...
256
00:10:36,719 --> 00:10:38,255
Innocent child!
257
00:10:38,429 --> 00:10:39,169
Aah!
[ Tires screech ]
258
00:10:39,347 --> 00:10:41,009
Aah!
259
00:10:41,182 --> 00:10:44,391
[ Glass shatters, body thuds
in slow motion ]
260
00:10:44,561 --> 00:10:46,644
[ Splattering ]
261
00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:07,831
[ Crying ] I know.
I know, it's so sad.
262
00:11:10,628 --> 00:11:13,541
Well, how nice.
That's a little more like it.
263
00:11:13,715 --> 00:11:16,048
Well, guys, what happened?
Change of heart?
264
00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:17,048
Yeah, you didn't hear?
265
00:11:17,218 --> 00:11:20,086
Gary Borkovec got ran over
by a distracted driver.
266
00:11:20,263 --> 00:11:22,505
What?!
Gary Borkovec? Is he dead?
267
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:24,093
Yeah, dude, he's dead.
268
00:11:24,267 --> 00:11:25,428
Oh, that son of a bitch.
269
00:11:25,602 --> 00:11:27,013
I'm gonna talk
to the principal!
270
00:11:27,187 --> 00:11:28,644
Put down the candle,
Kenny!
271
00:11:28,813 --> 00:11:30,679
Like you ever gave a shit
about Gary Borkovec!
272
00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:32,894
[ Knocking ]
273
00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:35,684
Entrée vous.
274
00:11:35,862 --> 00:11:37,899
PC Principal, I'm trying to
raise suicide awareness,
275
00:11:38,072 --> 00:11:39,563
but everyone's preoccupied
276
00:11:39,741 --> 00:11:41,653
with this "don't be on your
phone when driving" crap.
277
00:11:41,826 --> 00:11:43,658
Gary Borkovec
was a good student.
278
00:11:43,828 --> 00:11:45,160
He didn't deserve
to be taken away
279
00:11:45,330 --> 00:11:46,662
by someone not paying attention
to the road.
280
00:11:46,831 --> 00:11:49,073
Yes, but Gary Borkovec
is already dead.
281
00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:50,912
There's nothing
we can do for him.
282
00:11:51,085 --> 00:11:53,077
Students need to focus on people
thinking about dying.
283
00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,337
I don't know
what more you want from me, bro.
284
00:11:55,506 --> 00:11:57,964
I can't just get people to care
with a stupid rap song.
285
00:11:58,134 --> 00:12:00,046
I need a full orchestra...
woodwinds, strings...
286
00:12:00,220 --> 00:12:01,677
I need black people
in white robes,
287
00:12:01,846 --> 00:12:03,087
white people
in black robes,
288
00:12:03,264 --> 00:12:05,472
and a thousand doves
to release into the air.
289
00:12:05,642 --> 00:12:10,262
I can give you two student
volunteers and one pigeon.
290
00:12:10,438 --> 00:12:12,896
Do you have any idea
how serious this is?
291
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,807
As someone who deals
with suicidal thoughts,
292
00:12:14,984 --> 00:12:17,146
I cannot believe the lack
of concern at this school!
293
00:12:17,320 --> 00:12:19,186
Maybe I should just take
the awareness of my suicide
294
00:12:19,364 --> 00:12:20,650
out to the public
on the streets!
295
00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:21,984
Maybe you should.
296
00:12:22,158 --> 00:12:23,820
Maybe I will!
297
00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:26,701
- Maybe you should.
- Maybe I will!
298
00:12:31,542 --> 00:12:32,453
[ Screams ]
299
00:12:32,627 --> 00:12:34,789
Ugh. [ Sighs ]
300
00:12:34,963 --> 00:12:36,079
Hey, Tweek.
301
00:12:36,256 --> 00:12:37,997
Look at what the president
tweeted now!
302
00:12:38,174 --> 00:12:39,381
What time is it, dude?
303
00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:41,507
Just read it!
304
00:12:41,678 --> 00:12:44,716
"North Korea doesn't have
the balls to attack Tweek.
305
00:12:44,889 --> 00:12:46,926
They have
little tiny rice balls."
306
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:50,059
They're gonna get me, Craig!
Look at what's on CNN!
307
00:12:50,228 --> 00:12:51,810
And the President's tweets
have certainly caught
308
00:12:51,980 --> 00:12:53,812
the attention of North Korea,
309
00:12:53,982 --> 00:12:55,598
who have been spending
the past several days
310
00:12:55,775 --> 00:12:58,392
viewing possible targets
for a nuclear strike
311
00:12:58,569 --> 00:13:00,231
if war were to break out...
312
00:13:00,405 --> 00:13:02,522
[ Screams ]
What am I gonna do?!
313
00:13:02,699 --> 00:13:04,315
You gotta calm down.
314
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:05,778
How am I supposed
to calm down?!
315
00:13:05,952 --> 00:13:07,363
North Korea is gonna get me!
316
00:13:07,537 --> 00:13:08,994
- They're gonna get me!
- Tweek. Tweek. Tweek.
317
00:13:09,163 --> 00:13:10,574
Let's think
this through logically.
318
00:13:10,748 --> 00:13:13,286
North Korea isn't going
to attack anyone, okay?
319
00:13:13,459 --> 00:13:14,700
They're not going to start
a war they can't win.
320
00:13:14,877 --> 00:13:15,742
Okay?
321
00:13:15,920 --> 00:13:17,252
- But, Craig, I...
- Tweek.
322
00:13:17,422 --> 00:13:19,254
You have to stop thinking
about it.
323
00:13:19,424 --> 00:13:21,586
Tell you what,
we're gonna go somewhere fun
324
00:13:21,759 --> 00:13:22,840
and make you feel better.
325
00:13:23,011 --> 00:13:24,377
[ Bell dings ]
326
00:13:24,554 --> 00:13:26,591
Give a minute of your time
for suicide awareness?
327
00:13:26,764 --> 00:13:28,050
Suicide is serious.
328
00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:30,136
Help tell people like Kyle
it's not a joke.
329
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:32,142
Hey, good for you guys,
trying to help.
330
00:13:32,312 --> 00:13:33,803
Yeah, make sure everyone
you know gets involved
331
00:13:33,980 --> 00:13:35,346
or else I'm gonna do it.
332
00:13:35,523 --> 00:13:37,059
We're getting a lot
of attention, Eric.
333
00:13:37,233 --> 00:13:38,815
Our website's already
full of kids
334
00:13:38,985 --> 00:13:39,941
saying they feel
the same way as you
335
00:13:40,111 --> 00:13:41,352
and want to get help.
336
00:13:41,529 --> 00:13:43,065
They want to get help?
For what?
337
00:13:43,239 --> 00:13:46,073
For wanting to take
their own lives.
338
00:13:46,242 --> 00:13:48,450
No, this is about me
killing myself.
339
00:13:48,619 --> 00:13:51,236
But, babe, there's a lot of kids
who feel the same way you do.
340
00:13:51,414 --> 00:13:53,201
They're full of shit,
Heidi.
341
00:13:53,374 --> 00:13:54,910
They're just trying
to get attention.
342
00:13:55,084 --> 00:13:57,542
What, are you actually talking
online to these asswipes?!
343
00:13:57,712 --> 00:13:59,999
I thought this was about raising
awareness and helping people.
344
00:14:00,173 --> 00:14:01,630
So you're just gonna e-mail
345
00:14:01,799 --> 00:14:02,880
with every every guy
who has a dick and a deathwish?
346
00:14:03,051 --> 00:14:04,292
Are we just your type?
347
00:14:04,469 --> 00:14:06,586
- Eric, come on.
- No, look, Heidi.
348
00:14:06,763 --> 00:14:08,504
I'm sorry, but you're the one
who started all this
349
00:14:08,681 --> 00:14:10,047
by telling everybody
that I was suicidal.
350
00:14:10,224 --> 00:14:11,431
Okay?
351
00:14:11,601 --> 00:14:13,183
Now I'm under
a lot of pressure to do it.
352
00:14:13,353 --> 00:14:15,140
So the only option I have
is to make sure
353
00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:17,305
that suicide prevention
becomes this entire town's
354
00:14:17,482 --> 00:14:18,848
number-one priority!
355
00:14:19,025 --> 00:14:20,232
Oh, God, did you see
356
00:14:20,401 --> 00:14:21,391
what the President said
about Asians now?
357
00:14:21,569 --> 00:14:22,685
Look out!
358
00:14:22,862 --> 00:14:25,104
[ Screams ]
359
00:14:26,157 --> 00:14:28,820
Oh, are you freakin'
serious?
360
00:14:30,870 --> 00:14:32,862
[ Riders scream in distance ]
361
00:14:33,039 --> 00:14:36,532
Okay, babe,
what do you wanna ride first?
362
00:14:36,709 --> 00:14:38,917
Ugh!
What are we doing here, Craig?
363
00:14:39,087 --> 00:14:41,500
We're gonna get your mind
off politics and have some fun.
364
00:14:41,672 --> 00:14:43,755
Now, what's your
favorite ride?
365
00:14:43,925 --> 00:14:45,791
The Ferris wheel!
366
00:14:49,263 --> 00:14:51,630
[ Laughs ]
367
00:14:51,808 --> 00:14:54,767
Isn't this lovely, Tweek?
Just look at that view.
368
00:14:54,936 --> 00:14:55,926
[ Cellphone chimes ]
369
00:14:56,104 --> 00:14:57,094
[ Gasps ]
Oh, God!
370
00:14:57,271 --> 00:14:58,387
Another tweet
from the president!
371
00:14:58,564 --> 00:15:00,305
Oh, come on.
372
00:15:00,483 --> 00:15:03,476
"Why would the U.S. be scared
of North Korea?
373
00:15:03,653 --> 00:15:05,770
Tweek is so not scared
he's at an amusement park
374
00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:06,858
in Denver right now."
375
00:15:07,031 --> 00:15:08,272
[ Gasps ]
Jesus Christ!
376
00:15:08,449 --> 00:15:09,781
We gotta get outta here!
377
00:15:09,951 --> 00:15:11,943
Tweek!
Tweek, use your brain.
378
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:14,533
North Korea isn't going
to attack an amusement park.
379
00:15:14,705 --> 00:15:16,162
You're safer here
than anywhere.
380
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,208
Oh, geez.
381
00:15:20,378 --> 00:15:22,870
The president just called
Kim Jong-un a fat midget.
382
00:15:23,047 --> 00:15:24,504
Oh, and now North Korea
is saying that they're gonna...
383
00:15:24,674 --> 00:15:25,505
Dad, look out!
384
00:15:25,675 --> 00:15:26,506
Oh, shit!
385
00:15:26,676 --> 00:15:27,541
[ Woman screams ]
386
00:15:27,718 --> 00:15:28,299
[ Screams ]
387
00:15:29,929 --> 00:15:30,715
Ride attendant:
All right, everyone,
388
00:15:30,888 --> 00:15:32,254
please wait
for your bumper cars
389
00:15:32,432 --> 00:15:33,798
to come to a complete stop.
390
00:15:33,975 --> 00:15:35,182
We hope you enjoyed
Crazy Cars...
391
00:15:35,351 --> 00:15:38,059
Mommy, look out!
[ Screams ]
392
00:15:43,943 --> 00:15:45,059
Oh, my God,
what is that?!
393
00:15:45,236 --> 00:15:46,568
What is that?!
394
00:15:46,737 --> 00:15:48,979
It's probably nothing.
Everything's fine.
395
00:15:49,157 --> 00:15:50,739
Will you please stop
saying that?!
396
00:15:50,908 --> 00:15:51,989
I can't take it!
397
00:15:52,160 --> 00:15:53,492
I'm trying
to make you feel better.
398
00:15:53,661 --> 00:15:56,278
Well, maybe I don't wanna
feel better right now!
399
00:15:56,456 --> 00:15:57,992
Okay, but think about that.
400
00:15:58,166 --> 00:15:59,532
That actually doesn't make
any sense.
401
00:15:59,709 --> 00:16:01,416
Why do you have to be
so logical?!
402
00:16:01,586 --> 00:16:03,327
I don't need you
to problem-solve all the time,
403
00:16:03,504 --> 00:16:06,121
I need you to... Agh!
I don't know!
404
00:16:06,299 --> 00:16:08,632
Tweek, honey, all week,
you've been freaking out,
405
00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:10,417
and I've been the one
forced to deal with it.
406
00:16:10,595 --> 00:16:11,961
You haven't been dealing
with it,
407
00:16:12,138 --> 00:16:13,629
you've been trying
to make it go away
408
00:16:13,806 --> 00:16:15,172
because my emotions
are freaking you out!
409
00:16:15,349 --> 00:16:17,511
[ People scream ]
410
00:16:17,685 --> 00:16:19,927
Tweek, North Korea
isn't bombing anyone.
411
00:16:20,104 --> 00:16:21,436
They would lose
the support of China,
412
00:16:21,606 --> 00:16:22,596
- and that would be...
- There you go again!
413
00:16:22,773 --> 00:16:23,934
Stop preaching facts
to me!
414
00:16:24,108 --> 00:16:25,189
It's not what I need!
415
00:16:25,359 --> 00:16:27,316
Well, I'm sorry that
I'm actually in control
416
00:16:27,487 --> 00:16:29,274
of my goddamn emotions,
ya baby!
417
00:16:30,948 --> 00:16:32,735
Oh, see, now you made me lose
control of my emotions.
418
00:16:32,909 --> 00:16:34,070
God damn it.
419
00:16:35,620 --> 00:16:37,452
[ Grumbling ]
420
00:16:37,622 --> 00:16:38,954
[ Screams ]
421
00:16:40,917 --> 00:16:43,000
[bell rings]
422
00:16:45,046 --> 00:16:47,333
Hey Craig, how come
Tweek's not at school?
423
00:16:47,507 --> 00:16:48,543
How should I know?
424
00:16:48,716 --> 00:16:50,673
Uh-oh.
Trouble in paradise?
425
00:16:50,843 --> 00:16:53,301
Look guys, Tweek doesn't
want help, okay?
426
00:16:53,471 --> 00:16:55,588
He just wants to overreact.
427
00:16:55,765 --> 00:16:57,506
Henry: Hey, guys,
could we have your attention?
428
00:16:57,683 --> 00:16:59,470
Tomorrow night, we'll be having
a memorial service
429
00:16:59,644 --> 00:17:01,636
for all the students we've lost
to distracted driving.
430
00:17:01,812 --> 00:17:03,303
We hope you can all bring
your families.
431
00:17:03,481 --> 00:17:04,722
Cool, yeah.
Hey, guys, and there's also
432
00:17:04,899 --> 00:17:06,390
gonna be a suicide awareness
pot luck
433
00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:08,308
at 7:30 tomorrow night
in the school gymnasium.
434
00:17:08,486 --> 00:17:09,852
We're gonna have lots of games
and face painting,
435
00:17:10,029 --> 00:17:12,066
and what are you guys
gonna have?
436
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:13,947
We're gonna have
some guest speakers
437
00:17:14,116 --> 00:17:14,947
and also provide
grievance counselors
438
00:17:15,117 --> 00:17:16,779
for those who need it.
439
00:17:16,953 --> 00:17:18,535
Yeah, grievance counseling...
that sounds super fun.
440
00:17:18,704 --> 00:17:19,694
Listen, guys,
there's a very real chance
441
00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,534
I might actually do it
right in front
442
00:17:21,707 --> 00:17:22,788
of everyone tomorrow,
so you don't want to miss it.
443
00:17:22,959 --> 00:17:24,996
Suicide prevention pot luck,
everybody.
444
00:17:25,169 --> 00:17:26,205
Eric, you need to stop.
445
00:17:26,379 --> 00:17:28,120
What they're doing is important.
446
00:17:28,297 --> 00:17:29,913
They're doing a memorial service
with speeches and crying.
447
00:17:30,091 --> 00:17:31,332
What's that gonna solve?
448
00:17:31,509 --> 00:17:32,875
it's not about
problem solving, Eric.
449
00:17:33,052 --> 00:17:34,338
It's about people
getting together
450
00:17:34,512 --> 00:17:36,629
and feeling
what they need to feel!
451
00:17:36,806 --> 00:17:39,014
People need help sorting out
their emotions sometimes.
452
00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:41,140
And the best thing
isn't always quick answers,
453
00:17:41,310 --> 00:17:43,097
But just being there,
supporting each other
454
00:17:43,271 --> 00:17:45,103
And talking through
those feelings.
455
00:17:45,273 --> 00:17:46,639
You are so up and down.
456
00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:48,398
I don't know what you want
from me, Heidi!
457
00:17:48,568 --> 00:17:49,558
Come on.
There has to be a way
458
00:17:49,735 --> 00:17:51,397
We can all work together,
here.
459
00:17:51,571 --> 00:17:52,903
So, now
you're on their side!
460
00:17:53,072 --> 00:17:55,314
Oh, my God, I'm seriously
gonna do it right now!
461
00:17:55,491 --> 00:17:56,857
Eric!
462
00:17:59,161 --> 00:18:00,572
[ Door opens ]
463
00:18:00,746 --> 00:18:02,863
Tweek!
What's going on?
464
00:18:03,040 --> 00:18:05,202
What? What do you mean
what's going on?!
465
00:18:05,376 --> 00:18:07,208
The same shit
that's been going on!
466
00:18:07,378 --> 00:18:08,789
Nothing's gotten
any better?!
467
00:18:08,963 --> 00:18:10,920
Oh, my God,
how does that make you feel?
468
00:18:11,090 --> 00:18:13,377
I feel scared!
I feel alone!
469
00:18:13,551 --> 00:18:14,917
That must be horrible
to feel that way!
470
00:18:15,094 --> 00:18:16,835
It must be hard for you
to even think!
471
00:18:17,013 --> 00:18:18,970
It is!
It's terrible!
472
00:18:19,140 --> 00:18:22,850
I bet it's terrible!
What else are you feeling?
473
00:18:23,019 --> 00:18:24,726
Like I have no control
over my life.
474
00:18:24,895 --> 00:18:26,807
Like I'm just a pawn
in a big game.
475
00:18:26,981 --> 00:18:28,347
Oh, that's a terrifying
thought.
476
00:18:28,524 --> 00:18:29,810
You must feel trapped.
477
00:18:29,984 --> 00:18:31,191
Yeah, like, trapped,
478
00:18:31,360 --> 00:18:32,851
But, like, completely unable
to even move.
479
00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:34,565
Jesus!
480
00:18:34,739 --> 00:18:35,980
It's like there's
no solution to any of this!
481
00:18:36,157 --> 00:18:37,739
What are you gonna do?
What can you do?
482
00:18:37,908 --> 00:18:40,867
I don't know.
It's... It's like maybe...
483
00:18:41,037 --> 00:18:42,403
Maybe I have to find a way
484
00:18:42,580 --> 00:18:44,572
to feel a little in charge
of me again.
485
00:18:44,749 --> 00:18:46,285
That sounds
so insurmountable, though.
486
00:18:46,459 --> 00:18:48,166
How would you even start?
487
00:18:48,336 --> 00:18:51,420
I don't know, but I-I gotta do
something about this.
488
00:18:51,589 --> 00:18:53,546
There's gotta be
a way I can...
489
00:19:01,724 --> 00:19:03,511
Thank you, Craig.
490
00:19:05,561 --> 00:19:06,847
I've got it.
491
00:19:07,021 --> 00:19:08,887
People aren't focused
on the right thing.
492
00:19:09,065 --> 00:19:11,603
I know what I should do.
493
00:19:11,776 --> 00:19:15,065
All right, everyone,
listen up.
494
00:19:15,237 --> 00:19:17,229
Tonight, one of our students
has put together a song
495
00:19:17,406 --> 00:19:18,897
about a very important issue.
496
00:19:19,075 --> 00:19:20,862
It's a song about how
there are certain times
497
00:19:21,035 --> 00:19:22,446
to not be on your phone.
498
00:19:22,620 --> 00:19:24,953
I hope you all listen carefully.
499
00:19:30,294 --> 00:19:35,210
[ Somber piano music plays ]
500
00:19:35,383 --> 00:19:37,796
♪ People are dying ♪
501
00:19:37,968 --> 00:19:40,585
♪ The fault is our own ♪
502
00:19:40,763 --> 00:19:43,255
♪ You can do lots of damage ♪
503
00:19:43,432 --> 00:19:45,719
♪ When you're on your phone ♪
504
00:19:45,893 --> 00:19:48,476
♪ We all have to agree ♪
505
00:19:48,646 --> 00:19:51,309
♪ To change it somehow ♪
506
00:19:51,482 --> 00:19:57,444
♪ Let's all make a pledge
to end it right now ♪
507
00:19:57,613 --> 00:19:58,854
♪ Put it down ♪
508
00:19:59,031 --> 00:20:00,522
♪ Don't be on your phone ♪
509
00:20:00,700 --> 00:20:02,692
♪ While being president ♪
510
00:20:02,868 --> 00:20:04,154
♪ Put it down ♪
511
00:20:04,328 --> 00:20:05,864
♪ You might do something dumb ♪
512
00:20:06,038 --> 00:20:08,030
♪ And cause an accident ♪
513
00:20:08,207 --> 00:20:10,950
♪ Let's all agree here today ♪
514
00:20:11,127 --> 00:20:13,369
♪ That if we're leader
of the USA ♪
515
00:20:13,546 --> 00:20:15,253
♪ We'll put it down ♪
516
00:20:15,423 --> 00:20:17,540
If at any point today,
you're being a president,
517
00:20:17,717 --> 00:20:18,753
put down your mobile device.
518
00:20:18,926 --> 00:20:20,337
♪ Put it down ♪
519
00:20:20,511 --> 00:20:22,343
If I'm on the phone,
I will not get behind
520
00:20:22,513 --> 00:20:24,129
the desk of an oval office.
521
00:20:24,306 --> 00:20:25,296
♪ Put it down ♪
522
00:20:25,474 --> 00:20:26,715
I'll take the pledge!
523
00:20:26,892 --> 00:20:27,973
I'll take the pledge!
524
00:20:28,144 --> 00:20:29,225
And I'll take the pledge.
525
00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:31,808
♪ No one cares ♪
526
00:20:31,981 --> 00:20:33,222
What's that?
I was just elected president?
527
00:20:33,399 --> 00:20:35,140
Well, then, goodbye!
528
00:20:35,317 --> 00:20:38,936
♪ Put it down
if you're president today ♪
529
00:20:39,113 --> 00:20:41,571
♪ If you find yourself
being president today ♪
530
00:20:41,741 --> 00:20:44,700
Hey Brian, look!
I was just elected president.
531
00:20:44,869 --> 00:20:46,701
That's great, Nancy.
Now, put down your phone.
532
00:20:46,871 --> 00:20:48,282
Right!
533
00:20:48,456 --> 00:20:51,449
♪ Ah, ah, ah, ah-ah-ah,
put it down ♪
534
00:20:51,625 --> 00:20:53,833
[ Rapping ] ♪ Give a standing
ovation for suicide in our nation ♪
535
00:20:54,003 --> 00:20:56,495
♪ Or I will rip my own guts out
without one hesitation ♪
536
00:20:56,672 --> 00:20:57,628
♪ Dedication,
that's what it's taken ♪
537
00:20:57,798 --> 00:20:58,754
♪ To waken people to care ♪
538
00:20:58,924 --> 00:21:00,085
♪ And still my future's
so hazy ♪
539
00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:01,545
♪ My girlfriend's
making me crazy ♪
540
00:21:01,719 --> 00:21:03,005
♪ But still
I'm working so hard ♪
541
00:21:03,179 --> 00:21:04,920
♪ You know,
just trying to hold on ♪
542
00:21:05,097 --> 00:21:06,963
♪ Cuz I know that you don't
miss me so much if I was gone ♪
543
00:21:07,141 --> 00:21:08,427
♪ And all the voices
start solo ♪
544
00:21:08,601 --> 00:21:09,762
♪ But every day,
I hear them grow ♪
545
00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:10,971
♪ Saying, Eric, don't do it ♪
546
00:21:11,145 --> 00:21:12,932
♪ Don't do it, nooooo ♪
547
00:21:13,105 --> 00:21:15,062
♪ Put it down ♪
548
00:21:15,232 --> 00:21:18,475
♪ Don't be on your phone
while being president ♪
549
00:21:18,652 --> 00:21:20,439
♪ Put it down ♪
550
00:21:20,613 --> 00:21:24,027
♪ You might do something dumb
and cause an accident ♪
551
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:26,817
♪ We all agree here today ♪
552
00:21:26,994 --> 00:21:29,361
♪ That if we're leader
of the USA ♪
553
00:21:29,538 --> 00:21:32,030
♪ We'll put it down ♪
554
00:21:34,960 --> 00:21:37,668
♪ Put it down ♪
555
00:21:41,926 --> 00:21:43,588
I'm not gonna do it,
you guys!
556
00:21:43,761 --> 00:21:45,172
It worked!
I'm not gonna do it!
557
00:21:45,222 --> 00:21:49,772
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