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You all know I'm not big on speeches.
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All right, who am I trying to kid?
3
00:00:04,968 --> 00:00:05,903
I love speeches.
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Love 'em.
5
00:00:08,175 --> 00:00:10,577
Everybody in this room has given
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00:00:10,644 --> 00:00:12,546
their heart and their soul
to this project.
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You have worked overtime.
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You have worked weekends.
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You have worked holidays.
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Mark missed the birth of his firstborn.
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Saul missed the birth
of his second born.
12
00:00:26,293 --> 00:00:28,862
Mary missed the births of her third,
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her fourth, and her fifth born,
14
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and it is all in the idea of sacrificing
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to achieve something
greater than ourselves.
16
00:00:40,841 --> 00:00:44,144
So whether or not this
wacky thing actually works,
17
00:00:44,211 --> 00:00:47,114
we all oughta be damn proud
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of the work that we have done here.
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Here we go.
20
00:00:52,352 --> 00:00:54,955
Everybody raise your glasses.
21
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Five, four, three,
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two, one.
23
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Stop the test! It's been called off!
24
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What the fuck are you saying?
25
00:01:04,364 --> 00:01:06,066
The entire product has been terminated.
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We're all being let go
without severance.
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On whose orders?
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Christian DeVille's.
29
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Christian DeVi...
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I... I can't turn it on?
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Not even once?
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This is bullshit!
33
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I gave my life to this project!
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My life!
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Synced & corrected by kinglouisxx
www.addic7ed.com
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Rain jackets, lawnmowers,
pi�a colada mix.
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If you can name it,
Hampton DeVille makes it.
38
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And now, you can add hurricane
machine to that list.
39
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Our guest today is dashing
investigative journalist
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Bonan Marrow,
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whose reporting led to the public outcry
42
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that caused the hurricane machine
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to be shut down.
44
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Now, Bonan,
45
00:02:01,255 --> 00:02:04,558
why would Christian DeVille
build a hurricane machine?
46
00:02:04,625 --> 00:02:07,461
Well, inside sources say
he was planning to sell this
47
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as a superweapon to the U.S. military.
48
00:02:11,064 --> 00:02:12,733
Well, I know a lot of people are calling
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for Christian DeVille to step down.
50
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This is just one in a long line
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of questionable decisions he's made.
52
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I think we all remember the Obelisk.
53
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Why do you need an iPad that big?
54
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Well, you're the one
who dated Christian.
55
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Maybe you can tell us.
56
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Is this man compensating for something?
57
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Ooh!
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Bonan, I will never tell.
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Except in my tell-all book,
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which you can preorder now.
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There's something
I need to discuss with you,
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but you have to swear on the Bible
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that this stays between us.
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Okay, I swear.
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Both hands.
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John, what is it?
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I always believed
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that Christian had some master plan,
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even if to us, it might seem strange
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or confusing
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or illegal,
72
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but lately,
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I've started to have doubts.
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To be self-critical,
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I may be blindly following
an absolute madman.
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I'm glad to hear you say this.
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The board of directors
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is holding an emergency meeting
tomorrow.
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Christian is vulnerable,
80
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and you and I both know someone
81
00:03:26,073 --> 00:03:28,442
who would make a much better CEO.
82
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Oh, no, no, no.
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I'm much happier as a supplicant.
84
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My podiatrist and I came
to that conclusion years ago.
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I meant me.
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I am going to make a play
against Christian,
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and I need your support.
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Whoa, Kate.
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You're a full-blown Judas?
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I can't believe I ever wanted
to be like Christian.
91
00:03:48,629 --> 00:03:50,430
Too much stress, and for what?
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Billions of dollars
93
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and the power to destroy the world?
94
00:03:53,166 --> 00:03:54,401
Who has the energy?
95
00:03:54,468 --> 00:03:56,170
It's funny, the fact
that our company is evil
96
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doesn't bother me
the way that it used to.
97
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I'm powerless,
98
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and quite frankly,
99
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I find that to be empowering.
100
00:04:01,508 --> 00:04:02,943
We're honestly lucky
to be where we're at.
101
00:04:03,043 --> 00:04:04,144
Nobody can blame us for anything,
102
00:04:04,211 --> 00:04:05,379
plus we get free bagels.
103
00:04:05,445 --> 00:04:06,847
Oh, right. It's Bagel Tuesday.
104
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Where the fuck are the fucking bagels?
105
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This company is evil.
106
00:04:24,598 --> 00:04:26,667
Is everyone excited for Bagel Tuesday?
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Yes!
108
00:04:28,135 --> 00:04:30,871
Let's see, I have plain bagels,
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egg, onion, everything, poppy,
jalape�o cheddar,
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00:04:33,941 --> 00:04:36,877
and even a few cinnamon raisin
for the freaks.
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00:04:36,944 --> 00:04:38,312
Yes.
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And we all know what goes perfectly
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with delicious bagels:
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freshly roasted coffee.
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And don't forget the fresh-squeezed OJ.
116
00:05:02,035 --> 00:05:03,871
Oh.
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00:05:03,937 --> 00:05:05,038
Oh.
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00:05:06,740 --> 00:05:08,208
All right.
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Eat up!
120
00:05:13,547 --> 00:05:15,349
I'm sorry.
121
00:05:15,415 --> 00:05:18,919
I thought everyone was excited
for Bagel Tuesday.
122
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Are you not all grateful
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for the feast I have provided you?
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Hmm.
125
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Well, you know, apparently,
126
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a lot of people don't appreciate
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what I do for this company.
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Some people even think
129
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I should step down as CEO.
130
00:05:41,108 --> 00:05:43,911
Well, let me explain something to you.
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There is no Hampton DeVille
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without Christian DeVille.
133
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I put the roof over your heads,
134
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I put the clothes on your backs,
135
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and I feed you scraps of bread
like ducks in a pond!
136
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Quack, quack!
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Quack, quack, amen.
138
00:06:05,732 --> 00:06:08,402
Now, I demand complete and total loyalty
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from my employees,
140
00:06:09,870 --> 00:06:11,905
so if there are any doubters
amongst you,
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00:06:12,039 --> 00:06:13,307
speak now or forever hold your...
142
00:06:16,143 --> 00:06:17,077
No!
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Oh, my fucking foot and butt!
144
00:06:27,354 --> 00:06:29,289
Oh, my God, are you okay?
145
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No, I'm not okay, you fucking morons!
146
00:06:31,391 --> 00:06:32,626
Somebody call the 5-0!
147
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John.
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John.
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John!
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Kate!
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You were right.
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Christian isn't a god.
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He's the devil.
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It's right there in the name!
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Christian DeVille!
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Like Cruella De Vil.
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Wow.
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Looking back, she was
a pretty bad egg herself.
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00:07:00,354 --> 00:07:02,623
Does this mean you'll help me?
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00:07:02,689 --> 00:07:04,224
Yes.
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00:07:04,291 --> 00:07:06,059
But we're gonna do it my way,
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which is whatever way you think is best.
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I make the rules,
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00:07:09,630 --> 00:07:11,832
and the first rule
is whatever you say goes.
165
00:07:13,367 --> 00:07:15,202
There's something
we need to discuss with you,
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but you have to swear on the Bible
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that this stays between us.
168
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This has the New Testament for Matt
169
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and the prequel for Jake.
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John, forget the goddamn Bible.
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Yes, sir.
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We are making a play against Christian,
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and if you side with us,
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you will have more money and power
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than you ever dreamed of.
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Congrats, sluts.
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Your days of doing grunt work
are finally over.
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From this moment forward,
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you are no longer
junior executives in training.
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You're now senior executives.
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00:07:41,929 --> 00:07:43,163
In theory.
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All you have to do
is walk out that door.
183
00:07:48,602 --> 00:07:51,070
Actually, we decided
we like where we're at.
184
00:07:51,071 --> 00:07:52,873
You guys just seem really stressed out
185
00:07:52,940 --> 00:07:54,441
all the time.
186
00:07:54,508 --> 00:07:56,910
With very little power comes
very little responsibility.
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We're Buddhists now.
188
00:07:59,413 --> 00:08:01,415
Well, sucks to be you then!
189
00:08:01,481 --> 00:08:03,050
You're gonna have more money and power
190
00:08:03,116 --> 00:08:04,451
whether you like it or not!
191
00:08:04,518 --> 00:08:05,519
And a bigger office.
192
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We like this office.
193
00:08:07,754 --> 00:08:09,056
- How do you like it now?
- Hey.
194
00:08:09,122 --> 00:08:10,090
- Huh?
- Ow!
195
00:08:10,157 --> 00:08:11,225
- How 'bout now?
- Whoa, what?
196
00:08:11,291 --> 00:08:12,860
Huh?
197
00:08:12,926 --> 00:08:13,861
How 'bout now?
198
00:08:13,927 --> 00:08:16,163
We are taking Christian down!
199
00:08:16,230 --> 00:08:17,497
And so are you!
200
00:08:17,564 --> 00:08:19,433
Want more, you sluts! Want more!
201
00:08:25,739 --> 00:08:27,708
Ouchy! Ouch!
202
00:08:29,584 --> 00:08:31,953
Welcome to the inner circle.
203
00:08:32,020 --> 00:08:34,255
You're all here because we trust you.
204
00:08:34,322 --> 00:08:36,291
Or because you were standing nearby
205
00:08:36,357 --> 00:08:38,393
when we were trying to recruit
somebody else
206
00:08:38,459 --> 00:08:40,595
and it would've been awkward
not to invite you.
207
00:08:40,662 --> 00:08:41,963
Kevin.
208
00:08:42,030 --> 00:08:44,465
Christian is a psychopathic dictator
209
00:08:44,532 --> 00:08:47,168
who has run this company
into the ground.
210
00:08:47,235 --> 00:08:48,736
I think we can all agree
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00:08:48,803 --> 00:08:50,405
I will be a more democratic leader.
212
00:08:50,471 --> 00:08:52,907
So without further discussion,
let's move on.
213
00:08:52,974 --> 00:08:55,810
Our job today is to build
a case against Christian
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00:08:55,877 --> 00:08:58,012
that Kate and I can present
to the board tomorrow.
215
00:08:58,079 --> 00:09:02,116
So we need to make a list
of everything he's done wrong.
216
00:09:02,183 --> 00:09:04,452
We only have one whiteboard?
217
00:09:04,519 --> 00:09:05,753
Good point.
218
00:09:05,820 --> 00:09:07,956
Matt, Jake, fetch us
some more whiteboards.
219
00:09:08,022 --> 00:09:09,991
I thought we weren't doing
any more grunt work.
220
00:09:10,058 --> 00:09:11,726
Save your crying for bath time
221
00:09:11,793 --> 00:09:13,361
like the rest of us.
222
00:09:14,362 --> 00:09:15,730
The surgery was a success.
223
00:09:15,797 --> 00:09:18,833
Your foot and butt will make
a full recovery.
224
00:09:18,900 --> 00:09:20,268
However, I'd like to keep you overnight
225
00:09:20,335 --> 00:09:21,636
just for observation.
226
00:09:21,703 --> 00:09:22,971
Is that really necessary?
227
00:09:23,037 --> 00:09:24,405
Don't worry. You won't be bothered.
228
00:09:24,472 --> 00:09:25,773
When we learned you were coming,
229
00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:27,275
we moved all the other patients
on this floor
230
00:09:27,342 --> 00:09:28,576
to the wet basement.
231
00:09:28,643 --> 00:09:30,445
If you want the whole building
to yourself,
232
00:09:30,511 --> 00:09:32,947
we can have them thrown out
to the streets.
233
00:09:33,681 --> 00:09:35,116
Hmm. No, they can stay.
234
00:09:35,149 --> 00:09:38,019
Anyways, it'll just be you
and Nurse Richard here.
235
00:09:38,119 --> 00:09:39,654
I'll take it from here, Doc.
236
00:09:42,724 --> 00:09:43,825
Mm.
237
00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:48,897
You don't remember me?
238
00:09:48,963 --> 00:09:50,164
I'm afraid I don't.
239
00:09:51,432 --> 00:09:54,235
I used to work at Hampton DeVille.
240
00:09:54,302 --> 00:09:55,970
Wrote a funny tweet about a hurricane,
241
00:09:56,037 --> 00:09:58,172
then you fired me.
242
00:09:58,239 --> 00:09:59,908
If you say so. Now, if you don't...
243
00:09:59,974 --> 00:10:03,144
You know, my life took
a real dark turn after that.
244
00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:06,381
Started drinking, gambling.
245
00:10:06,447 --> 00:10:08,449
I got into dogfighting.
246
00:10:08,516 --> 00:10:11,819
Those hounds tore my ass up good.
247
00:10:11,886 --> 00:10:16,157
Funny thing is,
I blamed you for all of it.
248
00:10:16,224 --> 00:10:19,193
I vowed if I ever saw you again,
249
00:10:19,260 --> 00:10:23,565
I would do terrible,
terrible things to you.
250
00:10:24,532 --> 00:10:26,501
Mm.
251
00:10:26,568 --> 00:10:28,670
But then I found God.
252
00:10:28,736 --> 00:10:31,806
Stitched my ass up,
enrolled in nursing school,
253
00:10:31,873 --> 00:10:34,542
dedicated my life
to helping other people.
254
00:10:34,609 --> 00:10:36,511
Now here I am.
255
00:10:37,779 --> 00:10:38,846
All 'cause of you.
256
00:10:38,913 --> 00:10:41,215
So...
257
00:10:41,282 --> 00:10:42,717
thank you.
258
00:10:42,784 --> 00:10:44,619
Glad I was able to help.
259
00:10:44,686 --> 00:10:46,421
You know, when I saw you
260
00:10:46,487 --> 00:10:48,923
admitted into the hospital today,
261
00:10:48,990 --> 00:10:51,125
I immediately knew
262
00:10:51,159 --> 00:10:55,129
that it was all part
of God's master plan
263
00:10:55,163 --> 00:10:57,565
so that I can do some good
264
00:10:57,632 --> 00:10:59,133
and make you pay
265
00:10:59,200 --> 00:11:01,135
for all the evil
that you've done to the world.
266
00:11:01,169 --> 00:11:02,870
Oh, wait, no, no! What are you doing?
267
00:11:02,937 --> 00:11:04,939
Ooh! That's... that's just...
268
00:11:11,279 --> 00:11:12,714
Okay. What else?
269
00:11:12,780 --> 00:11:14,382
Christian's responsible for turning 9/11
270
00:11:14,449 --> 00:11:15,850
into a commercial holiday.
271
00:11:15,917 --> 00:11:18,253
How could we forget Remember Day?
272
00:11:18,319 --> 00:11:19,420
What else?
273
00:11:19,487 --> 00:11:20,788
I hit a fisherman with my truck
274
00:11:20,855 --> 00:11:22,155
a few nights back.
275
00:11:22,156 --> 00:11:23,858
We could pin that on Christian
if you want.
276
00:11:23,925 --> 00:11:25,193
- Toss it on the board.
- Wonderful!
277
00:11:25,260 --> 00:11:26,895
Okay. What else?
278
00:11:26,961 --> 00:11:29,530
Well, I guess
there's the hurricane machine.
279
00:11:29,597 --> 00:11:32,300
Says a lot that it took us
this long to even get to it.
280
00:11:32,367 --> 00:11:34,101
To be fair, Kate,
you were pretty involved
281
00:11:34,102 --> 00:11:35,570
in those hurricane machine meetings.
282
00:11:35,637 --> 00:11:37,104
I don't know if you can
pin that entirely on Christian.
283
00:11:37,105 --> 00:11:38,773
- Hold your tongue!
- No.
284
00:11:38,840 --> 00:11:40,608
John, he's right.
285
00:11:40,675 --> 00:11:42,110
If Christian is going down,
286
00:11:42,143 --> 00:11:44,279
he's gonna wanna take us down with him.
287
00:11:44,345 --> 00:11:46,314
We should see what there is in writing.
288
00:11:46,381 --> 00:11:49,484
Okay, so the first email
about the hurricane machine
289
00:11:49,551 --> 00:11:52,153
was sent by...
290
00:11:52,220 --> 00:11:53,187
Kate.
291
00:11:53,254 --> 00:11:55,456
"Let's get the ball rolling
292
00:11:55,523 --> 00:11:58,126
on this fantastic
hurricane machine idea."
293
00:11:58,192 --> 00:12:00,328
And then I responded with,
294
00:12:00,395 --> 00:12:01,963
"Count me in."
295
00:12:02,030 --> 00:12:04,766
Okay, but Christian's gotta
be on here somewhere, right?
296
00:12:04,832 --> 00:12:05,767
Let's see.
297
00:12:05,833 --> 00:12:07,335
Uh, here's Jake.
298
00:12:07,402 --> 00:12:10,138
"I'm in as long as we test it
on New Jersey first."
299
00:12:10,204 --> 00:12:12,139
To which Kevin replied...
300
00:12:12,140 --> 00:12:13,241
"LOL."
301
00:12:13,308 --> 00:12:15,310
Christian's not even on this thread.
302
00:12:15,376 --> 00:12:17,178
That delegating motherfucker.
303
00:12:17,245 --> 00:12:19,781
If Christian goes down, we all go down.
304
00:12:19,847 --> 00:12:21,149
I'm not going back to the clink.
305
00:12:21,215 --> 00:12:22,784
No one's going to the clink, you idiot!
306
00:12:22,850 --> 00:12:25,687
If I go back to the clink,
I'm taking you with me, Katie.
307
00:12:25,753 --> 00:12:27,255
And you, too, Johnny Boy!
308
00:12:27,322 --> 00:12:28,623
Kevin, don't you dare threaten
309
00:12:28,690 --> 00:12:30,158
to put me in the clink,
you fucking murderer!
310
00:12:30,225 --> 00:12:31,626
Everyone stop calling it the clink!
311
00:12:31,693 --> 00:12:33,861
That's what they call it in the slammer.
312
00:12:33,928 --> 00:12:35,363
Guys, can we please stop arguing
313
00:12:35,430 --> 00:12:36,497
and just order some food?
314
00:12:36,564 --> 00:12:37,565
We're all just on edge
315
00:12:37,632 --> 00:12:38,933
because Christian ruined breakfast.
316
00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:41,502
Okay, let's just cross
hurricane machine off the list
317
00:12:41,569 --> 00:12:42,904
and order some food.
318
00:12:42,971 --> 00:12:45,840
What does everybody want?
319
00:12:45,907 --> 00:12:47,408
Well, I don't want any fish.
320
00:12:47,475 --> 00:12:49,143
Well, great, Kev. That narrows it down.
321
00:12:49,978 --> 00:12:54,148
Look who got a visit
from the dinner fairy.
322
00:12:57,118 --> 00:12:59,921
Man, what the fuck is going on?
323
00:12:59,988 --> 00:13:01,356
Help! Help!
324
00:13:01,422 --> 00:13:02,891
Help! Help!
325
00:13:02,957 --> 00:13:04,425
Hel...
326
00:13:04,492 --> 00:13:06,561
right, I'm the only nurse on duty.
327
00:13:06,628 --> 00:13:08,196
I don't know about you,
328
00:13:08,263 --> 00:13:09,597
but I'm feeling a little naughty.
329
00:13:09,664 --> 00:13:12,367
What do you say we start with dessert?
330
00:13:18,273 --> 00:13:21,509
That's good.
331
00:13:21,576 --> 00:13:24,045
Oh, I get it.
332
00:13:24,145 --> 00:13:26,214
You see me as some...
333
00:13:26,281 --> 00:13:27,649
Evil billionaire
334
00:13:27,715 --> 00:13:30,585
who's ruining the world
with my evil corporation.
335
00:13:30,652 --> 00:13:33,321
Well, grow the fuck up.
336
00:13:33,388 --> 00:13:35,156
That hurricane machine
everyone's so mad about
337
00:13:35,223 --> 00:13:37,392
employed thousands
of hard-working people
338
00:13:37,458 --> 00:13:39,827
until that bonehead
Bonan Marrow had to butt in
339
00:13:39,894 --> 00:13:40,929
and get them all fired.
340
00:13:40,995 --> 00:13:43,264
He's evil! I'm the good guy!
341
00:13:43,331 --> 00:13:45,233
Will you stop making airplane sounds?
342
00:13:45,300 --> 00:13:46,367
Uh-oh!
343
00:13:46,434 --> 00:13:48,403
This plane is off course!
344
00:13:48,469 --> 00:13:51,104
It's gonna make a crash landing!
345
00:13:55,310 --> 00:13:57,111
Oat Zone.
346
00:13:59,180 --> 00:14:01,583
Another for Barley Barn.
347
00:14:01,649 --> 00:14:03,718
And...
348
00:14:03,785 --> 00:14:04,919
Pesto Palace?
349
00:14:04,986 --> 00:14:06,654
God damn it!
350
00:14:06,721 --> 00:14:08,223
It's another tie!
351
00:14:08,289 --> 00:14:11,459
Okay, who keeps throwing away
their vote on Pesto Palace?
352
00:14:11,526 --> 00:14:13,695
It's a third-party candidate
and you know it!
353
00:14:13,761 --> 00:14:15,230
I vote on principle!
354
00:14:15,296 --> 00:14:17,031
Why don't we just order
a bunch of pizzas?
355
00:14:17,131 --> 00:14:19,132
What are we, a softball team?
356
00:14:19,133 --> 00:14:20,935
Okay, you know what?
357
00:14:21,002 --> 00:14:21,936
I'm in charge!
358
00:14:22,003 --> 00:14:24,138
And we're going to Oat Zone!
359
00:14:24,205 --> 00:14:25,773
What happened to being
a democratic leader?
360
00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:27,408
Shut up and tell me
what kind of oats you want!
361
00:14:27,475 --> 00:14:28,576
Rolled or steel cut?
362
00:14:28,643 --> 00:14:30,411
Well, Oat Zone's closed.
363
00:14:30,478 --> 00:14:31,579
Fuck!
364
00:14:31,646 --> 00:14:32,647
Well, I'm thrilled,
365
00:14:32,714 --> 00:14:34,382
because I voted for Barley Barn.
366
00:14:34,449 --> 00:14:36,317
- That's closed too.
- God! Jesus Christ!
367
00:14:37,986 --> 00:14:40,388
Like no one ever wanted barley
after 2:00 a.m.?
368
00:14:40,455 --> 00:14:42,223
They're leaving money
on the farm-to-table!
369
00:14:42,290 --> 00:14:45,326
Matt, Jake, go out and get us some food!
370
00:14:45,393 --> 00:14:47,295
I thought you said we didn't
have to do grunt work anymore.
371
00:14:47,362 --> 00:14:49,697
- You go do the goddamn food, you son of a bitch!
- Go and get us the fucking food!
372
00:14:49,764 --> 00:14:52,267
- Go!
- Get up and get us food!
373
00:14:52,333 --> 00:14:55,103
What I'm remembering now
is that being powerless sucks.
374
00:14:55,169 --> 00:14:56,504
Yeah. I definitely want money.
375
00:14:56,571 --> 00:14:57,805
And power.
376
00:14:57,872 --> 00:14:59,374
I don't know what
Buddhists are talking about.
377
00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:00,608
Maybe you can only be a Buddhist
378
00:15:00,675 --> 00:15:02,610
if you already have money and power?
379
00:15:02,677 --> 00:15:04,979
Yeah, like how celebrities
only care about the environment
380
00:15:05,113 --> 00:15:07,949
once they're bored
of having sex with each other.
381
00:15:08,016 --> 00:15:10,117
Wait, Matt.
382
00:15:10,118 --> 00:15:11,519
We do have power.
383
00:15:11,586 --> 00:15:12,820
If we go to Christian right now,
384
00:15:12,887 --> 00:15:14,289
we could tell him
what Kate and John are up to
385
00:15:14,355 --> 00:15:15,523
and sabotage the coup.
386
00:15:15,590 --> 00:15:17,258
I bet he'd promote us as a reward.
387
00:15:17,325 --> 00:15:18,726
That's genius.
388
00:15:18,793 --> 00:15:20,995
We'll get everything we want,
then become Buddhists.
389
00:15:21,129 --> 00:15:22,196
Then have a ton of sex,
390
00:15:22,263 --> 00:15:23,631
then start caring about the environment.
391
00:15:23,698 --> 00:15:26,134
Then...
392
00:15:26,167 --> 00:15:27,368
No, Matt, that's it.
393
00:15:27,435 --> 00:15:29,103
Oh.
394
00:15:29,170 --> 00:15:31,000
Don't you ever just wish there was more?
395
00:15:31,507 --> 00:15:32,808
And then I wrote,
396
00:15:33,133 --> 00:15:35,417
"Sell consumer data
to the Chinese government
397
00:15:35,449 --> 00:15:38,118
"to disrupt
the next presidential election?
398
00:15:38,178 --> 00:15:40,180
I'm down to clown."
399
00:15:40,247 --> 00:15:41,815
To which Kevin replied...
400
00:15:41,882 --> 00:15:43,116
"LOL."
401
00:15:43,183 --> 00:15:45,519
"LOL."
402
00:15:45,585 --> 00:15:47,454
Looks like we're complicit
in this one too.
403
00:15:49,789 --> 00:15:50,891
Oh, great.
404
00:15:50,957 --> 00:15:52,659
At least we're saving energy.
405
00:15:52,726 --> 00:15:54,261
There's one thing
Hampton DeVille's doing
406
00:15:54,327 --> 00:15:55,862
that's not evil.
407
00:15:55,929 --> 00:15:59,599
I'm gonna say something controversial.
408
00:15:59,666 --> 00:16:02,903
I don't think Hampton DeVille is evil.
409
00:16:02,969 --> 00:16:07,541
I mean, what even is Hampton DeVille?
410
00:16:07,607 --> 00:16:08,909
A corporation.
411
00:16:08,975 --> 00:16:12,412
Right, but what is a corporation?
412
00:16:12,479 --> 00:16:13,747
A building?
413
00:16:13,814 --> 00:16:14,915
Money.
414
00:16:14,981 --> 00:16:17,083
A group of people... Maroon 5...
415
00:16:17,150 --> 00:16:18,718
- Maroon 5.
- Maroon 5!
416
00:16:18,785 --> 00:16:21,855
That's what I'm talking about.
417
00:16:21,922 --> 00:16:24,391
What the fuck
418
00:16:24,457 --> 00:16:27,427
is Maroon 5?
419
00:16:27,494 --> 00:16:29,496
It's an imaginary concept
420
00:16:29,563 --> 00:16:32,532
made up by a sociopath,
421
00:16:32,599 --> 00:16:34,334
just like Hampton DeVille.
422
00:16:34,401 --> 00:16:38,538
It's a triangle we ascribe meaning to.
423
00:16:38,605 --> 00:16:41,708
But we're the ones who drive
to the office in the morning
424
00:16:41,741 --> 00:16:45,412
to have meetings
about hurricane machines.
425
00:16:45,479 --> 00:16:47,447
Maybe we're the ones to blame.
426
00:16:47,514 --> 00:16:51,485
We did all this evil shit
for a fucking triangle!
427
00:16:51,551 --> 00:16:52,819
Okay.
428
00:16:52,886 --> 00:16:55,288
You know, it has been fun catching up,
429
00:16:55,355 --> 00:16:57,958
but I think it's time
we wrap this puppy up.
430
00:16:58,024 --> 00:17:00,726
You know, I'd tell you
that this is gonna be painless,
431
00:17:00,727 --> 00:17:03,730
but I graduated at the bottom
of my class in nursing school,
432
00:17:03,797 --> 00:17:07,067
so I'm just gonna guess
where your artery is.
433
00:17:07,133 --> 00:17:08,235
Christian, there's something we need...
434
00:17:09,636 --> 00:17:11,071
Richard?
435
00:17:11,137 --> 00:17:12,839
Oh, my God. Hey, man.
436
00:17:12,906 --> 00:17:14,608
Uh, hey, guys!
437
00:17:14,741 --> 00:17:15,609
You're a doctor now?
438
00:17:15,742 --> 00:17:17,244
Nurse, but yeah.
439
00:17:17,310 --> 00:17:18,778
I fucking love nurses.
440
00:17:18,845 --> 00:17:20,413
Best people on Earth.
441
00:17:20,480 --> 00:17:22,549
Give us a hug, my dude!
442
00:17:22,616 --> 00:17:24,217
- Come on!
- It's great to see you, man.
443
00:17:24,284 --> 00:17:25,519
- Yeah, you guys.
- Yeah.
444
00:17:25,585 --> 00:17:26,820
God, what's up, man? I love pink on you.
445
00:17:26,887 --> 00:17:28,321
You know, you boys are just in time.
446
00:17:28,388 --> 00:17:29,489
I was about to leave.
447
00:17:29,556 --> 00:17:30,991
Now, now, remember your doctor...
448
00:17:31,057 --> 00:17:32,559
Oh, no, no, no! I feel right as rain!
449
00:17:32,692 --> 00:17:34,060
Just untie these straps and let's go.
450
00:17:34,127 --> 00:17:36,062
All right. You heard the man.
451
00:17:36,129 --> 00:17:39,132
Wow, they really want you
to stay in your bed here.
452
00:17:39,199 --> 00:17:40,267
Like a prisoner or something.
453
00:17:44,070 --> 00:17:45,572
Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah.
454
00:17:45,705 --> 00:17:48,008
And so Kate and John are back
at the office right now
455
00:17:48,074 --> 00:17:49,309
trying to stab you in the back.
456
00:17:49,376 --> 00:17:50,510
But they didn't count on us
457
00:17:50,577 --> 00:17:52,179
stabbing them in their backs first.
458
00:17:52,245 --> 00:17:54,014
Or wait, no. Maybe we did it second.
459
00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:55,482
Regardless, it's self-defense,
460
00:17:55,549 --> 00:17:57,716
so legally, we think we're in the clear.
461
00:18:03,723 --> 00:18:06,726
Seems like everyone
has turned against me.
462
00:18:06,793 --> 00:18:08,328
Somewhere along the way,
463
00:18:08,395 --> 00:18:11,832
I forgot what Hampton DeVille really is.
464
00:18:11,898 --> 00:18:13,533
It's people.
465
00:18:13,600 --> 00:18:16,403
Good people, like the two of you.
466
00:18:16,469 --> 00:18:18,738
I'm afraid I don't
even remember your names.
467
00:18:18,772 --> 00:18:19,940
I'm Matt...
468
00:18:20,006 --> 00:18:22,242
I need to start listening to people.
469
00:18:22,309 --> 00:18:25,445
Is there anything I can do
to win everyone back?
470
00:18:35,021 --> 00:18:36,490
So it's decided.
471
00:18:36,556 --> 00:18:39,192
We're all gonna quit and stop
working for a corporation.
472
00:18:39,259 --> 00:18:41,795
And just pray that God forgives us.
473
00:18:41,862 --> 00:18:44,231
Guess we have to move to the woods.
474
00:18:44,297 --> 00:18:46,299
Live off the land.
475
00:18:46,366 --> 00:18:48,701
We could gather lumber
and sell it for money.
476
00:18:48,702 --> 00:18:50,003
We should incorporate.
477
00:18:50,070 --> 00:18:51,204
Avoid taxes.
478
00:18:51,271 --> 00:18:52,539
That's a great idea.
479
00:18:52,606 --> 00:18:54,574
Wait, no!
480
00:18:54,708 --> 00:18:56,710
Even if we quit, we can't escape!
481
00:18:56,776 --> 00:18:59,279
If only God would give us a sign.
482
00:19:07,187 --> 00:19:08,722
Christian's alive?
483
00:19:08,755 --> 00:19:09,956
You thought he was dead?
484
00:19:10,023 --> 00:19:13,360
No, I guess I just got
caught up in the moment.
485
00:19:13,426 --> 00:19:16,096
I know everything you've been doing.
486
00:19:16,163 --> 00:19:17,264
Christian, we're sorry.
487
00:19:17,330 --> 00:19:18,265
It was all Kate!
488
00:19:18,331 --> 00:19:20,066
- John!
- No.
489
00:19:20,133 --> 00:19:21,968
No, it's okay.
490
00:19:23,737 --> 00:19:25,338
Yesterday,
491
00:19:25,405 --> 00:19:27,741
I said there's no Hampton DeVille
492
00:19:27,774 --> 00:19:30,410
without me.
493
00:19:30,477 --> 00:19:33,113
But I was wrong.
494
00:19:33,180 --> 00:19:36,049
There's no Hampton DeVille
495
00:19:36,116 --> 00:19:38,451
without you.
496
00:19:38,518 --> 00:19:39,685
I only hope
497
00:19:39,686 --> 00:19:40,854
that you can find it in your hearts
498
00:19:40,921 --> 00:19:44,224
to accept my humble offering
499
00:19:44,291 --> 00:19:45,725
and forgive me.
500
00:19:49,963 --> 00:19:51,231
Dibs on jalape�o cheddar!
501
00:19:51,298 --> 00:19:53,867
Wait!
502
00:19:53,934 --> 00:19:55,701
I want the jalape�o cheddar.
503
00:19:55,702 --> 00:19:56,770
I'll maim you!
504
00:19:56,837 --> 00:19:58,000
I'll maim you all!
505
00:19:59,605 --> 00:20:02,131
There are two important
matters left to discuss.
506
00:20:02,718 --> 00:20:04,420
First,
507
00:20:04,510 --> 00:20:05,611
I wouldn't be here
508
00:20:05,686 --> 00:20:07,755
without two very courageous people...
509
00:20:10,750 --> 00:20:12,318
Jake and Matt.
510
00:20:12,385 --> 00:20:13,653
Jake
511
00:20:13,719 --> 00:20:15,354
and, of course,
512
00:20:15,421 --> 00:20:16,823
Bradley,
513
00:20:16,889 --> 00:20:20,326
and I think it's time
for a long overdue promotion.
514
00:20:20,393 --> 00:20:21,794
From this moment forward,
515
00:20:21,861 --> 00:20:24,030
you are no longer unpaid interns.
516
00:20:24,097 --> 00:20:25,865
You are now...
517
00:20:25,932 --> 00:20:28,067
junior executives in training.
518
00:20:28,134 --> 00:20:29,602
Hear, hear.
519
00:20:29,669 --> 00:20:31,137
Bravo!
520
00:20:31,204 --> 00:20:34,107
Well, at least he sort of
knows one of our names now.
521
00:20:34,173 --> 00:20:35,241
Things are looking up.
522
00:20:35,308 --> 00:20:36,709
And lastly,
523
00:20:36,776 --> 00:20:39,412
I think we need to have
a very serious conversation
524
00:20:39,479 --> 00:20:41,514
about what happened before
525
00:20:41,581 --> 00:20:44,250
when I...
526
00:20:44,317 --> 00:20:46,018
broke wind.
527
00:20:49,021 --> 00:20:50,523
Wasn't that funny?
528
00:20:55,394 --> 00:20:56,763
And yet none of you laughed!
529
00:20:56,829 --> 00:20:58,097
We were scared!
530
00:20:58,164 --> 00:20:59,532
John said, "No!"
531
00:20:59,632 --> 00:21:01,334
I did! I did!
532
00:21:33,032 --> 00:21:34,133
Open the door!
533
00:21:35,493 --> 00:21:37,407
You're gonna kill us all!
534
00:21:42,542 --> 00:21:44,744
Sometimes, life can be so painful,
535
00:21:44,811 --> 00:21:46,379
you just have to laugh!
536
00:21:56,860 --> 00:21:59,210
Gee, honey, we'd have fun!
36710
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