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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
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2
00:01:38,964 --> 00:01:42,634
- Good morning, beautiful.
3
00:01:42,636 --> 00:01:44,903
-What time is it?
4
00:01:44,905 --> 00:01:46,805
Eh, 9:00ish.
5
00:01:46,807 --> 00:01:47,940
-Oh.
6
00:01:47,942 --> 00:01:49,141
-Thanks for sleeping over.
7
00:01:49,143 --> 00:01:50,142
-Mm-hmm.
8
00:01:50,144 --> 00:01:52,177
-Feels weird sleeping alone.
9
00:01:52,179 --> 00:01:53,946
Like I'm...Sleeping alone.
10
00:01:53,948 --> 00:01:54,980
You want to move in?
11
00:01:54,982 --> 00:01:56,949
-Ugh, no!
12
00:01:56,951 --> 00:01:59,618
You have got a bad case
of the bed sprawl.
13
00:02:01,655 --> 00:02:04,790
Plus, things are getting
pretty serious with Jason.
14
00:02:04,792 --> 00:02:06,158
-Jason with the hair?
15
00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:07,960
-No, Jared with the hair.
16
00:02:07,962 --> 00:02:10,429
This is Jason with the glasses.
17
00:02:10,431 --> 00:02:13,031
-Didn't you just go out
with him, like, on a first date?
18
00:02:13,033 --> 00:02:14,133
-Uh-huh.
19
00:02:14,135 --> 00:02:16,335
And it was a great first date.
20
00:02:16,337 --> 00:02:18,270
And we've been texting...
21
00:02:18,272 --> 00:02:20,205
All the time!
22
00:02:24,144 --> 00:02:26,011
Anything?
23
00:02:26,013 --> 00:02:29,715
-Just the same three jobs
I'm not qualified for.
24
00:02:29,717 --> 00:02:30,716
This sucks.
25
00:02:30,718 --> 00:02:32,050
-You hated that job.
26
00:02:32,052 --> 00:02:33,952
-Yeah,
but at least I could pay rent.
27
00:02:33,954 --> 00:02:36,155
-Just get a temp job.
28
00:02:40,360 --> 00:02:42,861
Jason!
29
00:02:42,863 --> 00:02:45,497
-Who would ever want to
work a temp job?
30
00:02:50,036 --> 00:02:52,938
-Wakey, wakey, eggs and bakey.
31
00:03:00,548 --> 00:03:02,080
-Actually, no bakey.
32
00:03:02,082 --> 00:03:03,382
But there's a goat cheese
33
00:03:03,384 --> 00:03:05,217
and squash frittata
in the fridge.
34
00:03:05,219 --> 00:03:07,486
You can heat it
in the toaster oven at 350
35
00:03:07,488 --> 00:03:09,588
or totally ruin it in the micro.
36
00:03:09,590 --> 00:03:11,924
Amaretto mimosa?
-Oh, no, thanks.
37
00:03:11,926 --> 00:03:14,893
I gotta four-day gig
at mbst&t starting today.
38
00:03:14,895 --> 00:03:17,696
-No way!
They just moved me to mbst&t.
39
00:03:17,698 --> 00:03:19,865
I was totally planning
on having a lame day,
40
00:03:19,867 --> 00:03:21,500
and they've gone
and messed that up.
41
00:03:21,502 --> 00:03:23,035
Did you already
put in your money?
42
00:03:23,037 --> 00:03:25,204
-I put it in the ledger,
but I didn't red-light it.
43
00:03:30,377 --> 00:03:33,345
-What have we got,
like, 75 days left?
44
00:03:33,347 --> 00:03:36,582
-84 if we want to make it there
by Thanksgiving.
45
00:03:36,584 --> 00:03:38,083
-It's a small price to pay
for another
46
00:03:38,085 --> 00:03:41,587
epic Jefferson and Carter
ski adventure!
47
00:03:41,589 --> 00:03:44,756
Whoosh! Whoosh!
48
00:03:44,758 --> 00:03:48,026
We feeling the pink today?
49
00:03:48,028 --> 00:03:49,528
-Yeah, let's give it a try.
50
00:03:54,535 --> 00:03:56,702
-Yeah.
Yeah, I think that works.
51
00:05:15,683 --> 00:05:17,516
-Oh, yeah.
Shake that moneymaker.
52
00:05:17,518 --> 00:05:18,817
All right, guys,
53
00:05:18,819 --> 00:05:20,619
I need you to go through
these boxes here,
54
00:05:20,621 --> 00:05:22,721
make sure we shred anything
older than seven years.
55
00:05:22,723 --> 00:05:24,556
Dates are on the top
of these folders.
56
00:05:24,558 --> 00:05:25,991
Any questions?
57
00:05:25,993 --> 00:05:28,026
-That suit, Ann Taylor?
58
00:05:28,028 --> 00:05:30,195
-Um...It is.
59
00:05:30,197 --> 00:05:31,663
-You really wear it.
60
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:33,031
-Thank you, Jefferson.
61
00:05:34,868 --> 00:05:36,068
-Mrs. hwang?
62
00:05:36,070 --> 00:05:37,369
-Yes.
-Stephanie.
63
00:05:37,371 --> 00:05:39,071
Cal staff sent me over.
64
00:05:39,073 --> 00:05:42,808
-Okay,
why don't you come with me.
65
00:05:43,743 --> 00:05:45,010
-Ann Taylor?
66
00:05:45,012 --> 00:05:46,078
-I'm telling you, man,
67
00:05:46,080 --> 00:05:48,847
these things are a gold mine.
68
00:05:48,849 --> 00:05:50,549
-Ann Taylor?
69
00:05:50,551 --> 00:05:51,683
-Ross.
70
00:05:51,685 --> 00:05:53,985
-You really wear it.
71
00:05:55,154 --> 00:05:56,855
-We have 2,500 of these
72
00:05:56,857 --> 00:05:58,890
that need to be stuffed
and metered by lunch.
73
00:05:58,892 --> 00:06:00,392
As soon as the other temps
are finished shredding,
74
00:06:00,394 --> 00:06:02,160
they can jump in
and help you out.
75
00:06:02,162 --> 00:06:04,229
-Okay.
76
00:06:04,231 --> 00:06:06,832
-I know, not much time.
-I'll do my best.
77
00:06:06,834 --> 00:06:08,367
-I'd prefer
you just get it done.
78
00:06:08,369 --> 00:06:11,203
-Okay, I'll do that.
79
00:06:11,205 --> 00:06:13,438
-Are you talking back to me?
80
00:06:13,440 --> 00:06:14,506
-No?
81
00:06:14,508 --> 00:06:16,575
- There's a reason
82
00:06:16,577 --> 00:06:19,044
you're a temp worker,
you know that, right?
83
00:06:19,046 --> 00:06:20,946
-Because I got laid off?
84
00:06:20,948 --> 00:06:23,482
-I'm gonna let you in on
a little secret.
85
00:06:25,518 --> 00:06:28,019
They don't lay off
the good workers.
86
00:06:29,188 --> 00:06:30,922
-All right,
I'm gonna go stuff these.
87
00:06:30,924 --> 00:06:32,090
-Please do that.
-I'm going.
88
00:06:32,092 --> 00:06:33,225
-Go.
-Okay.
89
00:06:33,227 --> 00:06:34,226
-Hurry!
-I am.
90
00:06:34,228 --> 00:06:37,629
-Let's go.
91
00:06:37,631 --> 00:06:40,599
Temps.
92
00:06:40,601 --> 00:06:43,268
-Don't take it personally.
Hwang hates girls.
93
00:06:43,270 --> 00:06:45,203
All right, are we doing this?
-And go!
94
00:06:45,205 --> 00:06:46,571
-No, no, no.
-Corner back, corner back!
95
00:06:46,573 --> 00:06:48,874
Oh! Damn it.
96
00:06:48,876 --> 00:06:50,275
-Winner!
97
00:06:50,277 --> 00:06:53,545
-I demand a re-do.
98
00:06:53,547 --> 00:06:55,580
-Is this what you guys
normally do around here?
99
00:06:55,582 --> 00:06:57,716
-Uh...
100
00:06:57,718 --> 00:06:59,951
Sometimes we raid
the office supply closet
101
00:06:59,953 --> 00:07:02,387
and see if we can make a fort
out of anything.
102
00:07:02,389 --> 00:07:03,822
That gets real challenging.
103
00:07:03,824 --> 00:07:05,457
-You enjoy being a temp?
104
00:07:05,459 --> 00:07:07,959
-Temping is just a means
to an end, really.
105
00:07:07,961 --> 00:07:09,327
We're actually skiers.
106
00:07:09,329 --> 00:07:11,663
-Like professional skiers?
107
00:07:11,665 --> 00:07:14,499
-Yeah, kind of.
-Except we don't get paid.
108
00:07:14,501 --> 00:07:16,301
We're going to mount hood
this year.
109
00:07:16,303 --> 00:07:18,804
It's a straga volcano
or strata volcano.
110
00:07:18,806 --> 00:07:20,005
-Strata volcano.
-Yeah.
111
00:07:20,007 --> 00:07:21,573
-Strata volcano.
112
00:07:21,575 --> 00:07:25,444
-So skiing and temping.
Any other life plans?
113
00:07:25,446 --> 00:07:29,314
-I take it you're one
of those live to work people.
114
00:07:29,316 --> 00:07:32,617
-I appreciate the value
of a life's work, yes.
115
00:07:32,619 --> 00:07:34,786
-What's yours, then?
116
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:39,858
-Oh, well, I...
Went to school for accounting.
117
00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:41,293
-That sounds thrilling.
118
00:07:41,295 --> 00:07:43,995
-Well, what's your life's work,
skiing?
119
00:07:43,997 --> 00:07:45,964
-It's actually not
just about skiing,
120
00:07:45,966 --> 00:07:49,267
it's about, uh, seeing as many
incredible places
121
00:07:49,269 --> 00:07:51,470
and meeting
as many incredible people
122
00:07:51,472 --> 00:07:53,672
and gathering
as many meaningful experiences
123
00:07:53,674 --> 00:07:55,540
before shuffling off
this mortal coil.
124
00:07:55,542 --> 00:07:57,042
You know,
things you can't really do
125
00:07:57,044 --> 00:07:59,878
from a cubicle
or a corner office.
126
00:07:59,880 --> 00:08:02,614
Ever been skiing?
127
00:08:02,616 --> 00:08:04,182
-I was more
of a field hockey girl.
128
00:08:04,184 --> 00:08:05,884
-Me, too.
129
00:08:05,886 --> 00:08:08,453
-I have a boyfriend.
-Was that for me or for her?
130
00:08:08,455 --> 00:08:10,689
-You.
-Oh.
131
00:08:10,691 --> 00:08:13,859
Okay.
Congrats?
132
00:08:13,861 --> 00:08:16,228
-Sorry, I was just
trying to shut this down.
133
00:08:16,230 --> 00:08:17,529
-Shut what down?
134
00:08:17,531 --> 00:08:18,830
-This little banter
we have going on.
135
00:08:18,832 --> 00:08:20,365
-Why?
136
00:08:20,367 --> 00:08:22,634
-Banter usually
implies ulterior motives.
137
00:08:22,636 --> 00:08:24,536
- I'm not hitting on you.
138
00:08:24,538 --> 00:08:26,371
-Good.
139
00:08:26,373 --> 00:08:27,506
-Would you like me to?
140
00:08:27,508 --> 00:08:29,541
-No.
141
00:08:29,543 --> 00:08:32,644
-Seems like maybe you would like
him to hit on you.
142
00:08:32,646 --> 00:08:35,146
Call 'em like I see 'em.
143
00:08:38,718 --> 00:08:40,018
-I'm Jefferson.
144
00:08:40,020 --> 00:08:41,353
-Stephanie.
145
00:08:49,428 --> 00:08:50,996
-So what's your man list?
146
00:08:50,998 --> 00:08:53,732
-My man, oh,
what are you talking about?
147
00:08:53,734 --> 00:08:55,567
-You know, list of qualities
148
00:08:55,569 --> 00:08:57,068
a guy has to posses
in order for you
149
00:08:57,070 --> 00:08:59,905
to open up
your secret sexual side.
150
00:08:59,907 --> 00:09:01,773
-I don't think I have one.
151
00:09:01,775 --> 00:09:04,576
But if I'm trying to waste time
and not do work,
152
00:09:04,578 --> 00:09:08,580
I'd say um...He's gotta be nice,
but not too nice.
153
00:09:08,582 --> 00:09:10,181
-Okay.
154
00:09:10,183 --> 00:09:14,419
-Uh, and he's gotta
like kittens, puppies, and kids.
155
00:09:14,421 --> 00:09:17,422
-This is not quite as secret
or sexual as I was hoping for.
156
00:09:17,424 --> 00:09:18,690
-We're at work.
157
00:09:18,692 --> 00:09:20,225
-Hey, I'm sorry,
can I talk to Stephanie?
158
00:09:20,227 --> 00:09:22,027
She's the cute girl
i was just making out with
159
00:09:22,029 --> 00:09:23,461
in the broom closet.
-Shh!
160
00:09:23,463 --> 00:09:24,930
-Shh!
-Shh!
161
00:09:24,932 --> 00:09:26,231
-Shh, shh!
-Shh!
162
00:09:26,233 --> 00:09:27,866
-I have to say
as a casual observer
163
00:09:27,868 --> 00:09:30,268
of the female species,
you're all highly contradictory.
164
00:09:30,270 --> 00:09:32,904
Because as far as I can tell,
most girls not only have
165
00:09:32,906 --> 00:09:36,775
but, in fact, enjoy many forms
of loud, raunchy, kinky sex.
166
00:09:36,777 --> 00:09:38,109
-Gross.
167
00:09:38,111 --> 00:09:40,478
-See and yet none of you
will ever admit
168
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:43,615
that you like, want, or have
these various kinds of sex.
169
00:09:43,617 --> 00:09:45,116
What is that?
170
00:09:45,118 --> 00:09:46,651
Is that some kind of agreement
that you all have
171
00:09:46,653 --> 00:09:47,752
where if you don't
talk about it,
172
00:09:47,754 --> 00:09:49,054
it doesn't actually happen?
173
00:09:49,056 --> 00:09:50,388
Like, if a random girl
and a random guy
174
00:09:50,390 --> 00:09:51,823
have sex in a random forest,
175
00:09:51,825 --> 00:09:52,958
yet no one is there
to randomly see it,
176
00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:55,460
can you still call her a slut?
177
00:09:55,462 --> 00:09:59,664
Not that I would ever
call anyone a slut.
178
00:09:59,666 --> 00:10:01,333
Unless you want
to be called a slut.
179
00:10:01,335 --> 00:10:03,635
Even then, I think I would have
my hang-ups with it.
180
00:10:03,637 --> 00:10:06,004
Hello?
You want to get some lunch?
181
00:10:06,006 --> 00:10:08,907
-What are we gonna talk about?
182
00:10:08,909 --> 00:10:11,076
-The weather.
183
00:10:12,511 --> 00:10:15,880
-I like to be tied up.
184
00:10:18,851 --> 00:10:21,519
-Or we can talk about that.
185
00:10:22,955 --> 00:10:26,091
-But we can't.
I'm a girl.
186
00:10:27,493 --> 00:10:30,195
So you ready for lunch?
187
00:10:32,198 --> 00:10:33,598
-Yes.
188
00:10:47,881 --> 00:10:49,781
-Oh, my gosh!
189
00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:51,850
Josh and I would never
come into a store like this.
190
00:10:51,852 --> 00:10:56,054
-Well, maybe that is
why you broke up with him.
191
00:10:56,056 --> 00:10:57,622
-I like it.
-Mm-hmm.
192
00:12:11,097 --> 00:12:13,898
-Um...
193
00:12:13,900 --> 00:12:16,601
I don't really do that.
194
00:12:16,603 --> 00:12:18,103
-The...
-Yeah.
195
00:12:18,105 --> 00:12:20,905
-Oh. Oh, sure.
196
00:12:20,907 --> 00:12:22,540
Good.
-It's just I...
197
00:12:22,542 --> 00:12:23,775
I have lockjaw.
198
00:12:23,777 --> 00:12:25,276
-Ooh!
-Yeah.
199
00:12:25,278 --> 00:12:27,145
-That doesn't sound fun.
-Not at all.
200
00:12:27,147 --> 00:12:29,981
-Well, I should have asked.
That was -- sorry about that.
201
00:12:29,983 --> 00:12:31,483
-Okay.
-Um...
202
00:12:36,555 --> 00:12:39,090
-Oh! That is really gross.
203
00:12:39,092 --> 00:12:40,792
People poop in there.
204
00:12:40,794 --> 00:12:42,694
I poop in there.
205
00:12:53,472 --> 00:12:55,006
Oh!
206
00:12:55,008 --> 00:12:56,541
Ah!
207
00:13:07,453 --> 00:13:09,287
You know we have friends
waiting, right?
208
00:13:09,289 --> 00:13:10,955
-No, I'm sure they're fine.
-Oh!
209
00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:15,260
-Jefferson and I hit
the mountains every single year.
210
00:13:15,262 --> 00:13:18,596
We're going to mount hood
next year -- near Portland.
211
00:13:18,598 --> 00:13:22,300
You know
that's a strata volcano.
212
00:13:22,302 --> 00:13:23,868
-Oh?
213
00:13:23,870 --> 00:13:25,603
-Okay, stop, stop.
214
00:13:25,605 --> 00:13:27,472
You're starting to act like
that vibrator we got.
215
00:13:27,474 --> 00:13:30,642
- Exactly what does that mean?
216
00:13:30,644 --> 00:13:33,211
-It means you know
how it only has the one speed?
217
00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:36,114
Mee! Mee! Mee!
You know?
218
00:13:36,116 --> 00:13:37,782
- Mee!
219
00:13:40,653 --> 00:13:46,124
-Is that Annie Taylor
that you got on?
220
00:13:50,062 --> 00:13:53,665
-Would you like me to be
a little bit more variable?
221
00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:56,301
Maybe...A little bit
more, "rah!"
222
00:13:56,303 --> 00:13:59,337
Or, "errr!" Or,
"dugga-dugga-dugga-dugga."
223
00:13:59,339 --> 00:14:01,005
-Yeah.
224
00:14:01,007 --> 00:14:02,640
-Hey, got you a drink.
225
00:14:02,642 --> 00:14:04,209
Hope you don't mind germs,
226
00:14:04,211 --> 00:14:06,277
'cause I took
a little sip there.
227
00:14:10,717 --> 00:14:11,883
-Oh!
-Shh!
228
00:14:11,885 --> 00:14:14,352
-Ugh! That is really gross.
229
00:14:14,354 --> 00:14:16,254
People work here.
230
00:14:16,256 --> 00:14:18,389
I work here.
231
00:14:20,192 --> 00:14:22,694
-Can I ask your honest opinion.
232
00:14:22,696 --> 00:14:24,195
What do you think
of this jacket?
233
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:28,099
-No, you may not, and I love it!
234
00:14:28,101 --> 00:14:30,602
-Did we miss anything?
235
00:14:30,604 --> 00:14:35,240
-No, I was just telling Curtis
how awesome his jacket is.
236
00:14:35,242 --> 00:14:38,042
-It's kind
of getting warm in here.
237
00:14:38,044 --> 00:14:42,013
-I'm so confused.
Are you in a relationship?
238
00:14:42,015 --> 00:14:43,948
-We're just trying to keep it
in the moment.
239
00:14:43,950 --> 00:14:46,384
-I don't know what that means.
-I don't, either.
240
00:14:46,386 --> 00:14:49,254
Jefferson says it a lot,
seemed kind of romantic
241
00:14:49,256 --> 00:14:51,456
as I was getting
out of that Josh situation.
242
00:14:51,458 --> 00:14:52,757
-You were getting
out of a something
243
00:14:52,759 --> 00:14:55,360
that started
in junior high situation.
244
00:14:55,362 --> 00:14:58,863
So a toe fungus
would have seemed romantic.
245
00:15:02,802 --> 00:15:05,403
-Oh, well...
I like being in something
246
00:15:05,405 --> 00:15:07,472
that's maybe not so defined.
247
00:15:07,474 --> 00:15:11,309
-Okay, but if a...
248
00:15:11,311 --> 00:15:14,646
Relationship isn't defined
as a relationship,
249
00:15:14,648 --> 00:15:16,147
then is it really
a relationship,
250
00:15:16,149 --> 00:15:17,815
because it seems like half
251
00:15:17,817 --> 00:15:19,984
of what makes a relationship
a relationship
252
00:15:19,986 --> 00:15:23,121
is being able
to call it a relationship.
253
00:15:23,123 --> 00:15:24,322
Am I right?
-Whatever.
254
00:15:24,324 --> 00:15:26,591
You know, whatever.
I'm happy.
255
00:15:26,593 --> 00:15:30,828
And the sex
is fucking animal style.
256
00:15:30,830 --> 00:15:32,297
-I don't know.
257
00:15:32,299 --> 00:15:35,066
You always struck me
as the person
258
00:15:35,068 --> 00:15:37,435
who needed an update
on her Facebook status
259
00:15:37,437 --> 00:15:39,437
in order to go
fucking animal style.
260
00:15:39,439 --> 00:15:41,606
-That was the old Steph.
261
00:15:41,608 --> 00:15:43,341
-I want ice cream.
262
00:15:43,343 --> 00:15:45,910
Do you want ice cream?
263
00:15:49,949 --> 00:15:51,816
I want ice cream.
-Yeah.
264
00:16:22,181 --> 00:16:24,549
-Guess who sent me
a relationship request.
265
00:16:24,551 --> 00:16:27,051
-Oh, things are getting serious.
266
00:16:27,053 --> 00:16:28,486
What are you gonna do?
267
00:16:28,488 --> 00:16:30,521
-I don't know.
I'm gonna...
268
00:16:30,523 --> 00:16:32,156
Ignore her for now
and then just hope
269
00:16:32,158 --> 00:16:33,658
that she forgets she sent it.
270
00:16:33,660 --> 00:16:35,293
-Yeah, that's cool.
271
00:16:35,295 --> 00:16:37,795
I have an uncle who sends me
candy crush requests,
272
00:16:37,797 --> 00:16:39,697
and I just ignore them.
273
00:16:39,699 --> 00:16:43,901
I'm never gonna play
that game, okay?
274
00:16:43,903 --> 00:16:46,571
-Oops.
Dropped some shit there.
275
00:16:46,573 --> 00:16:49,707
-Thanks.
276
00:16:50,542 --> 00:16:51,909
Don't worry about it.
277
00:16:51,911 --> 00:16:54,679
-Oh! Mmm!
278
00:16:54,681 --> 00:16:58,583
-In order, nape of the neck,
eyes, and teeth.
279
00:16:58,585 --> 00:17:01,052
-Nape of the neck?
Dude, you're a liar.
280
00:17:01,054 --> 00:17:02,353
-I am not a liar.
281
00:17:02,355 --> 00:17:03,855
-That's the kind of list
a guy makes
282
00:17:03,857 --> 00:17:04,989
when he's embarrassed
to say the first thing
283
00:17:04,991 --> 00:17:06,090
he looks for are tits.
284
00:17:06,092 --> 00:17:07,191
-Tits?
285
00:17:07,193 --> 00:17:08,593
-Yes, every guy looks for tits.
286
00:17:08,595 --> 00:17:10,161
-No, you --
you can't help seeing them,
287
00:17:10,163 --> 00:17:11,662
they're right in front of you.
288
00:17:11,664 --> 00:17:15,199
What I look for
is a nice nape of the neck.
289
00:17:15,201 --> 00:17:16,934
-I guess you have a point.
290
00:17:16,936 --> 00:17:19,437
-Well, what's the first thing
that you look for?
291
00:17:19,439 --> 00:17:21,406
-Tits.
292
00:17:22,341 --> 00:17:24,976
-Hey, guys.
293
00:17:28,914 --> 00:17:30,448
-Oh!
294
00:17:30,450 --> 00:17:32,450
-Nice nape.
295
00:17:35,587 --> 00:17:37,922
-Who do you think was the genius
who first took a popsicle stick,
296
00:17:37,924 --> 00:17:40,258
jammed it in a hot dog,
and then dipped it in a fryer?
297
00:17:40,260 --> 00:17:43,628
-I notice you haven't accepted
my relationship status change.
298
00:17:46,465 --> 00:17:48,266
-What?
299
00:17:48,268 --> 00:17:50,568
-Yeah, I sent it to you,
like, two or three weeks ago.
300
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:53,071
It's not that big a deal,
i just figured
301
00:17:53,073 --> 00:17:56,474
maybe it's time our status
reflected our relationship.
302
00:17:56,476 --> 00:17:57,809
I did notice that you had time
303
00:17:57,811 --> 00:18:01,312
to post those hilarious
workplace memes.
304
00:18:01,314 --> 00:18:03,481
Classic.
305
00:18:03,483 --> 00:18:05,283
-Well...
306
00:18:05,285 --> 00:18:07,452
Remember how, um...
307
00:18:07,454 --> 00:18:10,321
Refreshing we thought
this thing is that we have?
308
00:18:10,323 --> 00:18:13,624
-What is this thing
that we have?
309
00:18:13,626 --> 00:18:15,793
-This?
-This.
310
00:18:15,795 --> 00:18:18,729
Us, you and me -- this.
311
00:18:18,731 --> 00:18:20,698
What is it?
312
00:18:22,568 --> 00:18:24,302
-Complicated.
313
00:18:24,304 --> 00:18:27,572
-Then how about it's complicated
as a status?
314
00:18:27,574 --> 00:18:30,475
Just some indication
that we're together.
315
00:18:30,477 --> 00:18:32,910
-Steph, it's only been,
like, a month.
316
00:18:34,346 --> 00:18:37,081
-It's been almost three.
317
00:18:37,083 --> 00:18:38,583
-Really?
318
00:18:38,585 --> 00:18:39,917
-Do you really think
I'd be doing the things
319
00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:42,587
we've been doing
with some random guy?
320
00:18:44,324 --> 00:18:47,158
-We haven't even
been on a real date yet.
321
00:18:47,160 --> 00:18:48,793
-Date?!
322
00:18:48,795 --> 00:18:50,461
You don't even buy me drinks.
323
00:18:50,463 --> 00:18:52,864
-Yeah, 'cause
that would make it a real date.
324
00:18:52,866 --> 00:18:56,367
-Oh. Wow.
325
00:18:56,369 --> 00:18:57,935
I --
326
00:18:57,937 --> 00:19:00,471
are you embarrassed
by me or something?
327
00:19:00,473 --> 00:19:01,706
-No!
328
00:19:01,708 --> 00:19:03,774
No, Steph, you are...
329
00:19:03,776 --> 00:19:06,711
Way one of the coolest, sexiest,
funniest chicks
330
00:19:06,713 --> 00:19:08,346
in the world, probably.
331
00:19:08,348 --> 00:19:09,614
-Then what the fuck?!
332
00:19:09,616 --> 00:19:11,482
-The fuck is...
333
00:19:11,484 --> 00:19:13,317
I don't know, why can't people
just be happy
334
00:19:13,319 --> 00:19:14,886
with the way things are?
335
00:19:14,888 --> 00:19:16,787
You know, why can't people
just live in the now?
336
00:19:16,789 --> 00:19:18,389
Why does everybody have to label
and compartmentalize
337
00:19:18,391 --> 00:19:21,058
everything in their lives?
-Because, Jefferson,
338
00:19:21,060 --> 00:19:22,460
that's how we make
an informed decision
339
00:19:22,462 --> 00:19:23,828
on what we keep
and what we throw out.
340
00:19:23,830 --> 00:19:25,630
-Like Josh?
341
00:19:27,065 --> 00:19:30,868
-Yes. Exactly like Josh.
342
00:19:30,870 --> 00:19:33,037
And whoever first decided
to jam a popsicle stick
343
00:19:33,039 --> 00:19:34,739
into a hot dog was an asshole!
344
00:19:34,741 --> 00:19:36,974
This is disgusting!
345
00:19:39,012 --> 00:19:41,245
-Stephanie!
346
00:19:41,247 --> 00:19:43,181
Steph!
347
00:19:43,183 --> 00:19:46,484
Estephania!
348
00:19:46,486 --> 00:19:48,886
Hey, that's my corn dog!
349
00:19:48,888 --> 00:19:51,355
That's my corn dog!
350
00:19:51,357 --> 00:19:52,523
You know what,
i don't want to be tagged
351
00:19:52,525 --> 00:19:53,824
in anyone's photos, either.
352
00:19:53,826 --> 00:19:55,026
It's a creepy invasion
of privacy.
353
00:19:55,028 --> 00:19:56,494
-I agree.
-This sucks, man.
354
00:19:56,496 --> 00:19:58,829
It's like I get punished
for knowing what I want.
355
00:19:58,831 --> 00:20:01,098
-What do you want?
356
00:20:02,768 --> 00:20:04,402
Holy crap!
357
00:20:04,404 --> 00:20:07,672
That's Allison segal
from high school.
358
00:20:12,744 --> 00:20:14,579
-Look at that,
it's Allison segal.
359
00:20:14,581 --> 00:20:16,714
-I want out with her once --
junior year.
360
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:18,082
-You did not go out
with Allison segal.
361
00:20:18,084 --> 00:20:19,584
You never went out with anybody.
362
00:20:19,586 --> 00:20:21,285
And Todd Parker went out
with Allison segal.
363
00:20:21,287 --> 00:20:22,753
-No, that was me.
364
00:20:22,755 --> 00:20:24,422
-Well, Todd Parker
went out with her, too.
365
00:20:24,424 --> 00:20:25,923
Then again, he crushed,
like, every girl in high school.
366
00:20:25,925 --> 00:20:27,525
I wonder what he's up to?
367
00:20:27,527 --> 00:20:29,460
-He's probably in jail.
368
00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:32,096
-Or witness protection.
We should call him.
369
00:20:32,098 --> 00:20:33,731
Will and Nicholas, too.
Those were good guys.
370
00:20:33,733 --> 00:20:35,600
-She didn't recognize us.
371
00:20:35,602 --> 00:20:37,268
-Or she did.
372
00:20:37,270 --> 00:20:40,538
-She looks exactly the same,
only more professional,
373
00:20:40,540 --> 00:20:44,475
like a businesswoman,
not a prostitute.
374
00:20:45,410 --> 00:20:47,044
I wonder if she's single.
375
00:20:47,046 --> 00:20:48,813
-No matter what I do,
I'm gonna befoul this thing
376
00:20:48,815 --> 00:20:50,414
with Stephanie.
377
00:20:50,416 --> 00:20:52,817
-Yeah.
378
00:20:52,819 --> 00:20:54,252
-What?
379
00:20:54,254 --> 00:20:57,455
-She's probably single.
380
00:20:57,457 --> 00:20:59,156
-Oh.
381
00:20:59,158 --> 00:21:00,958
Yeah.
382
00:21:28,487 --> 00:21:32,056
Where you at today?
383
00:21:46,204 --> 00:21:49,573
-Hell.
384
00:21:55,213 --> 00:21:56,947
-Me, too.
385
00:21:56,949 --> 00:22:00,851
I'm back working
with the hwang again.
386
00:22:05,290 --> 00:22:08,359
-Oh. My favorite.
387
00:22:08,361 --> 00:22:11,696
Say hi for me.
388
00:22:13,499 --> 00:22:14,965
-I thought about it,
389
00:22:14,967 --> 00:22:17,568
and maybe we can go out
on a real date,
390
00:22:17,570 --> 00:22:20,705
just so you can see
how much I suck at dating
391
00:22:20,707 --> 00:22:24,075
and why I shouldn't do it.
392
00:22:27,045 --> 00:22:31,515
-Are you asking me out
on a date?
393
00:22:31,517 --> 00:22:38,589
-For strictly scienti--
scientific purposes only.
394
00:22:47,866 --> 00:22:54,739
-I'd love to be experimented on.
395
00:23:08,554 --> 00:23:11,355
-Are you bored?
396
00:23:11,357 --> 00:23:13,524
-What? No, no.
397
00:23:13,526 --> 00:23:15,960
-Oh, great. I'm boring you.
I'm boring.
398
00:23:15,962 --> 00:23:18,429
-Stop it, you're not boring.
-I actually know that I am.
399
00:23:18,431 --> 00:23:19,764
It's okay, just go ahead
and say it,
400
00:23:19,766 --> 00:23:22,566
come out and tell me.
401
00:23:22,568 --> 00:23:24,435
-What you're sensing right now
is not boredom,
402
00:23:24,437 --> 00:23:25,870
it's just
like when I get hungry,
403
00:23:25,872 --> 00:23:27,872
I just get, you know,
one-track minded
404
00:23:27,874 --> 00:23:29,540
and, you know,
i just get tunnel vision.
405
00:23:29,542 --> 00:23:31,108
It's like boom -- food.
406
00:23:31,110 --> 00:23:32,443
Just...
407
00:23:32,445 --> 00:23:34,078
-Boom, food.
408
00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:35,946
-Tunnel vision.
409
00:23:37,816 --> 00:23:40,217
-Right.
410
00:23:54,633 --> 00:23:56,667
-Your hair looks really nice.
411
00:23:56,669 --> 00:23:58,769
Did you do something different?
412
00:23:58,771 --> 00:24:00,771
-Kind of.
413
00:24:00,773 --> 00:24:03,240
Thanks for noticing.
414
00:24:03,242 --> 00:24:06,277
-It looks really nice.
415
00:24:06,279 --> 00:24:09,246
-I'm glad you like it.
416
00:24:09,248 --> 00:24:11,682
- Oh.
417
00:24:22,461 --> 00:24:23,861
Dave Matthews?
418
00:24:23,863 --> 00:24:25,429
-No, way worse than that.
419
00:24:25,431 --> 00:24:26,997
-Jack Johnson,
'cause he's about as bad
420
00:24:26,999 --> 00:24:30,134
as anybody I can think of.
-Why do you want to know?
421
00:24:30,136 --> 00:24:32,269
-Because I think you can tell
a lot about somebody
422
00:24:32,271 --> 00:24:34,205
from their most embarrassing
music purchase.
423
00:24:34,207 --> 00:24:36,106
Dashboard confessional.
424
00:24:36,108 --> 00:24:37,975
-I like dashboard confessional.
425
00:24:37,977 --> 00:24:39,610
-Oh, god!
-I like them!
426
00:24:40,646 --> 00:24:41,879
-I like dashboard.
427
00:24:41,881 --> 00:24:43,447
-Oh, man, that --
428
00:24:43,449 --> 00:24:45,282
you really do have
questionable taste in music.
429
00:24:45,284 --> 00:24:47,885
Really questionable.
Jason mraz.
430
00:24:47,887 --> 00:24:49,854
-Not gonna tell you.
-Come on, I told you mine.
431
00:24:49,856 --> 00:24:53,357
-Oh, you told me you downloaded
a bright eyes album one time.
432
00:24:53,359 --> 00:24:55,025
How embarrassing is that?
-Super embarrassing.
433
00:24:55,027 --> 00:24:59,230
-I own all of his albums
plus an ep.
434
00:24:59,232 --> 00:25:00,998
-How can you say he won?!
435
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:02,666
Look, he's -- he's sulking back
into the ocean,
436
00:25:02,668 --> 00:25:04,001
a defeated beast.
437
00:25:04,003 --> 00:25:06,904
-She's returning home.
438
00:25:06,906 --> 00:25:08,739
-Godzilla's not a woman!
439
00:25:08,741 --> 00:25:13,878
-Um, she had a kid
in "Godzilla's revenge," hello!
440
00:25:13,880 --> 00:25:15,479
-We're gonna have to have
a serious talk,
441
00:25:15,481 --> 00:25:17,548
because that doesn't
qualify as a movie.
442
00:25:17,550 --> 00:25:19,717
-Okay, regardless of
how you feel about it,
443
00:25:19,719 --> 00:25:21,418
she would still be the winner.
444
00:25:21,420 --> 00:25:23,254
-Okay.
445
00:25:23,256 --> 00:25:25,556
Seriously, I just want you
to think about this, okay?
446
00:25:25,558 --> 00:25:27,424
Who would win in a fight --
447
00:25:27,426 --> 00:25:31,228
a giant, pre-historic dinosaur
with clear back problems
448
00:25:31,230 --> 00:25:34,999
or Kong,
the eighth wonder of the world?
449
00:25:35,001 --> 00:25:37,234
-Radioactive mutant lizard,
no question.
450
00:25:37,236 --> 00:25:39,603
-Ugh, you!
You're a lost cause.
451
00:25:39,605 --> 00:25:40,871
You're beautiful,
452
00:25:40,873 --> 00:25:42,373
but god damn it,
you're a lost cause.
453
00:26:04,095 --> 00:26:06,730
I had
a really good time tonight.
454
00:26:06,732 --> 00:26:09,433
- Yeah, me, too.
455
00:26:13,438 --> 00:26:14,805
I better go, though.
456
00:26:14,807 --> 00:26:17,875
-That would probably be best.
457
00:26:17,877 --> 00:26:20,945
-Yeah. Yeah.
458
00:26:20,947 --> 00:26:24,715
Otherwise, it's like there's
this giant elephant in the room
459
00:26:24,717 --> 00:26:28,118
that I want to...
460
00:26:31,323 --> 00:26:33,157
...fuck.
461
00:26:39,464 --> 00:26:42,132
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Go turn off the TV.
462
00:27:53,739 --> 00:27:56,006
That was like...
463
00:27:56,008 --> 00:28:00,878
Some of the most normal sex
we've ever had.
464
00:28:00,880 --> 00:28:03,547
-Is that a bad thing?
465
00:28:03,549 --> 00:28:06,917
-No.
466
00:28:13,425 --> 00:28:14,858
Creed.
467
00:28:14,860 --> 00:28:16,493
-You brought creed.
468
00:28:16,495 --> 00:28:18,429
Wow. That is...
469
00:28:18,431 --> 00:28:20,497
So much worse
than I could have thought.
470
00:28:20,499 --> 00:28:23,734
-I know! I know.
471
00:28:35,014 --> 00:28:37,614
You crack me up.
472
00:28:40,919 --> 00:28:43,353
-So this is how
it's gonna be, huh?
473
00:28:43,355 --> 00:28:44,922
Every morning when I wake up,
474
00:28:44,924 --> 00:28:47,224
you're gonna be here
taking away my opportunities
475
00:28:47,226 --> 00:28:49,126
to walk around naked.
476
00:28:49,128 --> 00:28:50,894
It's 4:00 in the afternoon.
477
00:28:50,896 --> 00:28:53,964
-I'm a night owl.
Hoot! Hoot!
478
00:28:53,966 --> 00:28:56,600
-Well, if you want to walk
around naked, be my guest.
479
00:28:56,602 --> 00:28:59,036
-I'm gonna hold you to that.
Where's Jefferson?
480
00:28:59,038 --> 00:29:00,437
-Out getting wine and cheese.
481
00:29:00,439 --> 00:29:01,772
We're going to see
a movie tonight
482
00:29:01,774 --> 00:29:03,607
at the Hollywood cemetery.
483
00:29:03,609 --> 00:29:07,611
-Ah, you're running
the bases backwards.
484
00:29:07,613 --> 00:29:09,279
-Running the bases backwards?
485
00:29:09,281 --> 00:29:10,748
-Means you start with sex
486
00:29:10,750 --> 00:29:13,250
and then you do
all that couply stuff.
487
00:29:13,252 --> 00:29:15,119
-Yeah, I guess.
488
00:29:15,121 --> 00:29:17,454
-Now, the pancakes
with orange zest.
489
00:29:17,456 --> 00:29:19,790
-Curtis?
490
00:29:19,792 --> 00:29:21,725
-Dude!
491
00:29:21,727 --> 00:29:23,560
-Oh, my god,
is that a real newspaper?
492
00:29:23,562 --> 00:29:26,730
-She's dead.
493
00:29:26,732 --> 00:29:28,966
-Allison segal? How?
494
00:29:28,968 --> 00:29:30,434
-Her heart exploded.
495
00:29:30,436 --> 00:29:33,737
-Gross!
496
00:29:38,243 --> 00:29:43,747
Should we say a prayer or...
Something?
497
00:29:43,749 --> 00:29:45,682
-I'm gonna be honest,
i feel little weird
498
00:29:45,684 --> 00:29:48,685
saying a prayer
over a pair of used panties.
499
00:29:48,687 --> 00:29:50,320
-What?
500
00:29:50,322 --> 00:29:54,024
I have a pair from every girl
I've been with.
501
00:29:54,026 --> 00:29:56,693
-Yeah, that's a little...
That's just creepy.
502
00:29:56,695 --> 00:29:58,328
Okay, Steph, back me up on this.
This is a little --
503
00:29:58,330 --> 00:30:00,164
-oh, actually,
i can't say anything. I --
504
00:30:00,166 --> 00:30:03,667
I do have a pair from
all the girls I've been with.
505
00:30:03,669 --> 00:30:06,837
-If only we had stopped her
to say hi.
506
00:30:06,839 --> 00:30:11,275
She could have been the one
to find a cure to cancer.
507
00:30:11,277 --> 00:30:12,676
-Was she that smart?
508
00:30:12,678 --> 00:30:15,512
-Or...Stumbled upon it.
509
00:30:15,514 --> 00:30:17,614
-I never knew Allison very well,
510
00:30:17,616 --> 00:30:19,449
but in high school,
511
00:30:19,451 --> 00:30:21,885
I was always a big fan
of her perky boobs --
512
00:30:21,887 --> 00:30:23,554
-don't say that,
you piece of shit!
513
00:30:23,556 --> 00:30:25,155
-Oh, Curtis, cool out!
514
00:30:25,157 --> 00:30:27,024
Cool out, man.
515
00:30:27,026 --> 00:30:30,661
-Jesus, Curtis, calm down.
516
00:30:30,663 --> 00:30:32,229
Not a...
517
00:30:32,231 --> 00:30:35,032
I'm sorry, I never knew you felt
that strongly about her.
518
00:30:35,034 --> 00:30:38,535
-She was my first.
519
00:30:38,537 --> 00:30:42,239
-I thought Janet moler
was your first.
520
00:30:45,711 --> 00:30:47,611
Orally.
521
00:30:52,684 --> 00:30:54,418
-Sometimes I don't get Curtis
at all.
522
00:30:54,420 --> 00:30:56,353
-Haven't you ever been
madly in love?
523
00:30:56,355 --> 00:30:57,688
-Please,
he was not madly in love.
524
00:30:57,690 --> 00:30:59,156
I didn't even
know they were going out.
525
00:30:59,158 --> 00:31:00,991
-And what about you?
526
00:31:00,993 --> 00:31:03,026
- I thought I was, once.
527
00:31:03,028 --> 00:31:04,261
Turned out to be the flu.
528
00:31:04,263 --> 00:31:07,998
-I'm serious.
-I'm serious, too.
529
00:31:08,833 --> 00:31:11,702
Just once,
then I lost all self-respect.
530
00:31:11,704 --> 00:31:13,503
-What happened?
531
00:31:13,505 --> 00:31:16,039
-Ugh, I don't know.
It was like a year ago.
532
00:31:16,041 --> 00:31:17,875
We were going out for a while,
and then suddenly she decided
533
00:31:17,877 --> 00:31:19,776
she needed to find herself.
534
00:31:19,778 --> 00:31:23,347
Apparently, she'd been hiding
inside another man's penis.
535
00:31:23,349 --> 00:31:24,915
-That's a good place to hide.
536
00:31:24,917 --> 00:31:26,917
Bet you didn't think
to look there.
537
00:31:26,919 --> 00:31:28,418
-Are you folks ready to order?
538
00:31:28,420 --> 00:31:30,754
-Sure.
Go ahead.
539
00:31:30,756 --> 00:31:34,258
-Uh...
The, um, the chicken special.
540
00:31:34,260 --> 00:31:35,893
How does that come?
541
00:31:35,895 --> 00:31:37,361
-Baked, broiled, barbecue,
stuffed, flame-broiled,
542
00:31:37,363 --> 00:31:39,363
peppered, on in a nice pot pie.
543
00:31:39,365 --> 00:31:40,898
-Um...
544
00:31:40,900 --> 00:31:43,267
The -- the broi--
broiled chicken special.
545
00:31:43,269 --> 00:31:45,235
-Me, too.
-How would you like the potato?
546
00:31:45,237 --> 00:31:47,571
-Baked.
-What are the other options?
547
00:31:47,573 --> 00:31:48,772
-Baked, whipped,
scalloped, au gratin,
548
00:31:48,774 --> 00:31:50,474
country-fried, French fries.
549
00:31:50,476 --> 00:31:52,609
-Can we possibly substitute that
with like a fruit compote?
550
00:31:52,611 --> 00:31:54,278
-Just get whipped.
Everyone likes whipped.
551
00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:55,746
-I do like whipped.
I'll get whipped.
552
00:31:55,748 --> 00:31:56,947
-Soup or salad?
-Salad.
553
00:31:56,949 --> 00:31:58,415
-Sure.
-Two salads.
554
00:31:58,417 --> 00:32:00,083
-Ranch, Russian,
thousand island, blue cheese,
555
00:32:00,085 --> 00:32:02,085
ranch peppercorn, ranch
vinaigrette, house Italian?
556
00:32:02,087 --> 00:32:03,987
-Do you have roquefort, or is
that the same as blue cheese?
557
00:32:03,989 --> 00:32:05,322
-If they had roquefort,
she'd say roquefort.
558
00:32:05,324 --> 00:32:06,990
-Unless they were
the same thing.
559
00:32:06,992 --> 00:32:09,259
-We have blue cheese.
-House Italian for me, please.
560
00:32:09,261 --> 00:32:11,128
-Can I switch that to the soup?
-Veggie, beef barley,
561
00:32:11,130 --> 00:32:12,996
chicken noodle, cream of celery,
or matzo ball.
562
00:32:12,998 --> 00:32:14,965
-Just go with the salad,
house dressing.
563
00:32:14,967 --> 00:32:17,134
-Sure, yeah. Does the special
come with bread?
564
00:32:17,136 --> 00:32:18,802
-Yes, white, wheat,
rye, marble rye, pumpernickel,
565
00:32:18,804 --> 00:32:20,804
sour dough, kaiser roll,
or bread stick.
566
00:32:20,806 --> 00:32:22,472
-Can we just get a variety
in a basket?
567
00:32:22,474 --> 00:32:23,840
-Two specials, broiled,
568
00:32:23,842 --> 00:32:25,342
potatoes --
one baked, one whipped --
569
00:32:25,344 --> 00:32:27,611
two salads, house dressing,
basket of bread.
570
00:32:27,613 --> 00:32:28,912
Anything to drink?
571
00:32:28,914 --> 00:32:30,514
-Two cokes.
-I'll be up all night.
572
00:32:30,516 --> 00:32:31,915
-Coke, diet coke,
sprite, root beer, iced tea,
573
00:32:31,917 --> 00:32:33,917
lemonade, o.J., coffee,
tea, or milk?
574
00:32:33,919 --> 00:32:36,987
-One coke, one...
-Sprite?
575
00:32:39,490 --> 00:32:41,325
You're very decisive.
576
00:32:41,327 --> 00:32:43,827
-Maybe that's your problem,
you need to be more decisive.
577
00:32:43,829 --> 00:32:46,430
-Well, I have way
more problems than that.
578
00:32:46,432 --> 00:32:47,464
I think.
579
00:32:52,437 --> 00:32:54,104
-I'm sorry, you guys.
580
00:32:54,106 --> 00:32:57,407
We're all out of chicken.
581
00:33:33,078 --> 00:33:34,811
-Hey.
-Hey, how's it going?
582
00:33:34,813 --> 00:33:36,079
Am I interrupting?
583
00:33:36,081 --> 00:33:37,881
-Not at all.
584
00:33:37,883 --> 00:33:40,817
I was just warming up,
loosen out all those bugs.
585
00:33:40,819 --> 00:33:43,487
-Mm-hmm.
What for?
586
00:33:43,489 --> 00:33:45,822
-Well, after seeing
Allison right before she died,
587
00:33:45,824 --> 00:33:48,725
I realized she saw me
for who I was.
588
00:33:48,727 --> 00:33:51,561
She saw that I had the soul
of an artist.
589
00:33:51,563 --> 00:33:53,163
-Wait, what?
What does that mean?
590
00:33:53,165 --> 00:33:56,066
- I'm gonna be a dancer.
591
00:33:56,068 --> 00:33:58,568
-Like as a job,
you're gonna do it as a job?
592
00:33:58,570 --> 00:34:00,904
-It's not commerce
of the wallet,
593
00:34:00,906 --> 00:34:03,340
it's commerce of the spirit.
594
00:34:03,342 --> 00:34:05,709
We only live once.
595
00:34:05,711 --> 00:34:09,212
I need to find a way
to express myself.
596
00:34:09,214 --> 00:34:10,547
-Through dance?
597
00:34:10,549 --> 00:34:13,583
-Yes.
598
00:34:13,585 --> 00:34:15,819
How do you express yourself?
599
00:34:17,422 --> 00:34:20,624
-Um, ah, I'm not sure I do.
600
00:34:20,626 --> 00:34:22,692
-That's your problem.
601
00:34:22,694 --> 00:34:25,695
-Why does everybody think
i have a problem lately?
602
00:34:25,697 --> 00:34:28,065
I'm actually very happy
with my life.
603
00:34:28,067 --> 00:34:30,434
-That's your problem, too.
604
00:34:38,076 --> 00:34:41,044
Plans and projects
605
00:35:06,138 --> 00:35:08,405
-no fucking way!
Todd Parker!
606
00:35:08,407 --> 00:35:10,740
-Jeffy! Wow!
Hey, how are you, man?
607
00:35:10,742 --> 00:35:12,342
-Oh, where have you been, man?
608
00:35:12,344 --> 00:35:14,077
Curtis and I were just taking
bets on whether you were
609
00:35:14,079 --> 00:35:17,314
in prison or witness protection.
-Oh, no, no, no.
610
00:35:17,316 --> 00:35:19,583
-Still cruising the bitches
and slapping the hos?
611
00:35:19,585 --> 00:35:21,084
-Eh, not so much.
612
00:35:21,086 --> 00:35:22,986
-They must have named an std
after you now.
613
00:35:22,988 --> 00:35:24,321
I swear, you had 30
different strands of chlamydia
614
00:35:24,323 --> 00:35:25,856
that one summer.
615
00:35:25,858 --> 00:35:27,324
Speaking of bitches you crushed,
616
00:35:27,326 --> 00:35:28,692
did you hear
about Allison segal?
617
00:35:28,694 --> 00:35:30,427
-Yeah, it's sad.
-Fucking terrible.
618
00:35:30,429 --> 00:35:32,929
-By the way, this is my wife.
619
00:35:32,931 --> 00:35:34,030
-Oh.
620
00:35:34,032 --> 00:35:35,832
-And my little girl, Claudia.
621
00:35:35,834 --> 00:35:37,267
-Your...
622
00:35:37,269 --> 00:35:38,702
Your little...
623
00:35:38,704 --> 00:35:40,637
-Nice to meet you.
-Nice to meet you. Hi.
624
00:35:40,639 --> 00:35:42,939
- This is Jeffy.
625
00:35:42,941 --> 00:35:45,008
We were...Pals.
626
00:35:45,010 --> 00:35:46,209
-Yeah.
-At school.
627
00:35:46,211 --> 00:35:47,777
-Yeah, yeah.
628
00:35:47,779 --> 00:35:51,114
Wow! Look at --
Todd Parker and fam.
629
00:35:51,116 --> 00:35:52,482
This is just --
you know what?
630
00:35:52,484 --> 00:35:54,284
Can I get a picture of you guys?
This --
631
00:35:54,286 --> 00:35:55,952
Curtis is gonna
laugh his ass off.
632
00:35:55,954 --> 00:35:57,954
Oh, wow!
633
00:35:57,956 --> 00:36:00,457
Uh, a little closer.
A little closer.
634
00:36:00,459 --> 00:36:04,127
Yeah. That's all right.
I'll widen out. Nice.
635
00:36:04,129 --> 00:36:06,329
Oh, you would not believe
the trouble we used to get into.
636
00:36:06,331 --> 00:36:08,698
This guy.
-Yeah, she's heard the stories.
637
00:36:08,700 --> 00:36:11,067
-Uh, Claudia's getting
a little grumpy here.
638
00:36:11,069 --> 00:36:13,136
I'm gonna take her to the car.
639
00:36:13,138 --> 00:36:14,804
It was nice to meet you, Jeffy.
640
00:36:14,806 --> 00:36:17,374
-Nice to meet you.
-See you in a bit.
641
00:36:17,376 --> 00:36:19,309
I'll be right out.
642
00:36:19,311 --> 00:36:22,646
-Bye, Claudia.
643
00:36:23,481 --> 00:36:24,681
-Shit, man,
how many fucking times
644
00:36:24,683 --> 00:36:26,082
did I tell you to wrap it up?
645
00:36:26,084 --> 00:36:27,350
You're lucky it was a baby
and not aids.
646
00:36:28,720 --> 00:36:32,923
Yeah, well, I...
I kind of wanted this one.
647
00:36:32,925 --> 00:36:34,491
But, anyway, what's going on
with you, man?
648
00:36:34,493 --> 00:36:36,059
You working, what are you doing?
649
00:36:36,061 --> 00:36:38,161
-Oh, yeah, yeah! You know,
working -- oops, shit!
650
00:36:38,163 --> 00:36:39,663
Working on not working.
651
00:36:39,665 --> 00:36:42,165
Working on getting
to a mountain each season.
652
00:36:42,167 --> 00:36:44,201
Hey, so, you know,
i was gonna go get a drink.
653
00:36:44,203 --> 00:36:45,535
You should come out with.
654
00:36:45,537 --> 00:36:47,337
-Oh...No, I can't.
655
00:36:47,339 --> 00:36:50,674
I, uh, I gotta get Claudia down.
It's past her bedtime.
656
00:36:50,676 --> 00:36:52,409
-Bedtime? It's like --
657
00:36:52,411 --> 00:36:54,511
-naptime, you know.
658
00:36:55,714 --> 00:36:57,414
-Not really.
-Babies take naps.
659
00:36:57,416 --> 00:36:59,516
-Yeah.
Well, maybe another time then.
660
00:36:59,518 --> 00:37:00,850
We'll go out for a...
661
00:37:00,852 --> 00:37:02,385
You know,
Curtis would love to see you.
662
00:37:02,387 --> 00:37:04,554
Speaking of, do you ever
see will or Nicholas or --
663
00:37:04,556 --> 00:37:07,057
-oh, yeah, yeah.
They're -- they're both married.
664
00:37:07,059 --> 00:37:09,159
Will's working on kid
number two.
665
00:37:10,361 --> 00:37:12,796
- What?!
-Yeah, I know.
666
00:37:12,798 --> 00:37:14,231
-What?! Married?!
-Yeah.
667
00:37:14,233 --> 00:37:16,633
-Kids? What --
what happened to you guys?
668
00:37:16,635 --> 00:37:19,102
You all get, like, abducted
by aliens or something?
669
00:37:19,104 --> 00:37:22,973
-Oh, no, we just kind
of grew up, you know.
670
00:37:22,975 --> 00:37:24,241
You know what?
671
00:37:24,243 --> 00:37:26,376
Let me get a picture
of you, too.
672
00:37:26,378 --> 00:37:29,813
The guys are not gonna believe
how much you have not changed.
673
00:37:29,815 --> 00:37:31,715
-Yeah. How about this?
674
00:37:31,717 --> 00:37:33,250
Sun's out, guns out.
Do this.
675
00:37:33,252 --> 00:37:35,485
-Oh, yeah, yeah!
Classic Chucky.
676
00:37:35,487 --> 00:37:36,886
Oh, so stupid.
-It's like old times.
677
00:37:36,888 --> 00:37:38,755
You get it?!
-That's awesome!
678
00:37:38,757 --> 00:37:40,390
Oh, man.
679
00:37:40,392 --> 00:37:42,959
Well, I gotta get out of here,
but good to see you.
680
00:37:42,961 --> 00:37:44,894
-Yeah, totally.
-Say hi to Curtis.
681
00:37:44,896 --> 00:37:47,797
Tell him I remember
he owes me 40 bucks.
682
00:37:47,799 --> 00:37:49,432
-Dude, he's gonna flip.
-Yeah.
683
00:37:49,434 --> 00:37:51,134
All right, see ya.
-Oh, hey, um...
684
00:37:51,136 --> 00:37:55,472
Speaking of, do you think
i could borrow, like, 20 bucks?
685
00:37:58,509 --> 00:38:00,910
-30 different strands
of chlamydia?
686
00:38:00,912 --> 00:38:02,345
-He was exaggerating.
687
00:38:02,347 --> 00:38:04,247
It was one summer, I got it,
like, twice.
688
00:38:04,249 --> 00:38:06,983
It's not a big deal.
It was like 10 years ago.
689
00:38:06,985 --> 00:38:08,752
-I don't want you hanging out
with him.
690
00:38:08,754 --> 00:38:11,321
-Okay, well, you don't have
to worry about it.
691
00:38:43,021 --> 00:38:46,156
-Hello.
-Hey.
692
00:38:46,158 --> 00:38:48,625
-Unironic knuckle bump.
693
00:38:48,627 --> 00:38:50,527
-What are we moronically
knuckle-bumping to?
694
00:38:50,529 --> 00:38:53,229
-Unironically knuckle-bumping
to the somebody here
695
00:38:53,231 --> 00:38:55,965
who got a real job today.
696
00:38:55,967 --> 00:38:57,534
-What?!
-Yeah.
697
00:38:57,536 --> 00:38:59,069
It's only
an entry-level position,
698
00:38:59,071 --> 00:39:02,739
but it's full-time
with benefits and a key fob!
699
00:39:02,741 --> 00:39:06,543
-I didn't even know
that you were looking or...
700
00:39:06,545 --> 00:39:08,545
Full-time, huh?
-Yeah!
701
00:39:08,547 --> 00:39:10,547
Yeah, I just put it out
into the universe,
702
00:39:10,549 --> 00:39:12,382
then I ran into
this old friend of mine.
703
00:39:12,384 --> 00:39:14,984
Her company was looking,
and the next thing you know...
704
00:39:14,986 --> 00:39:17,721
Key fob!
-Sweet.
705
00:39:17,723 --> 00:39:19,189
Soon you'll be able
to afford some atvs
706
00:39:19,191 --> 00:39:20,824
and jet skis you'll never use.
707
00:39:20,826 --> 00:39:24,027
-What are you talking about?
708
00:39:24,029 --> 00:39:25,395
-I'm kidding, I'm kidding.
709
00:39:25,397 --> 00:39:28,064
This is exciting.
Come here. Come here.
710
00:39:28,066 --> 00:39:29,232
Mmm!
711
00:39:29,234 --> 00:39:31,568
-Mwah!
712
00:39:31,570 --> 00:39:34,137
Oh.
713
00:39:38,242 --> 00:39:40,243
You don't want to be a temp
for the rest of your life,
714
00:39:40,245 --> 00:39:42,779
do you?
715
00:39:44,216 --> 00:39:46,416
-What?
716
00:39:46,717 --> 00:39:48,718
-Yeah.
717
00:39:48,720 --> 00:39:50,086
Oh.
718
00:39:50,088 --> 00:39:53,123
Oh, what's her name?
719
00:39:53,125 --> 00:39:54,858
-Dad.
-Oh, sounds hot.
720
00:39:54,860 --> 00:39:59,195
-I need to go
get something from him.
721
00:39:59,197 --> 00:40:01,898
-Does this mean
i get to meet your dad?
722
00:40:01,900 --> 00:40:03,967
-No.
723
00:40:18,650 --> 00:40:21,284
-There's my boy!
How are the slopes?!
724
00:40:21,286 --> 00:40:23,319
-Gonna find out.
725
00:40:23,321 --> 00:40:24,821
-Come aboard, come aboard.
726
00:40:26,658 --> 00:40:27,824
-Oh.
-Tricky.
727
00:40:27,826 --> 00:40:30,093
-Oh.
-Mind if I vape?
728
00:40:30,095 --> 00:40:35,298
I got a sweet little
personal-use grow-op topside.
729
00:40:35,300 --> 00:40:38,468
For my migraines
and anxieties -- totally legal.
730
00:40:38,470 --> 00:40:40,303
But...
731
00:40:40,305 --> 00:40:43,573
I lace it with a hint of opium.
Not as legal.
732
00:40:43,575 --> 00:40:45,575
Dad, it's 10:30 in the morning.
733
00:40:45,577 --> 00:40:50,613
-Well, what is you kids say,
it's 4:20 somewhere.
734
00:40:50,615 --> 00:40:52,982
-Oh, no. Thank you.
735
00:41:08,265 --> 00:41:10,633
-Anyway.
736
00:41:10,635 --> 00:41:11,801
-Oh.
737
00:41:11,803 --> 00:41:14,838
Uh, it's from you grandma.
738
00:41:14,840 --> 00:41:16,372
And then...
739
00:41:16,374 --> 00:41:19,008
I had to borrow,
like, 40 bucks out of there
740
00:41:19,010 --> 00:41:22,479
to cover my health insurance.
741
00:41:22,481 --> 00:41:25,748
-It's -- it's fine.
742
00:41:32,456 --> 00:41:34,524
Dad?
743
00:41:34,526 --> 00:41:36,192
Dad?
-Oh, my god, man.
744
00:41:36,194 --> 00:41:39,195
Where's my manners.
Let me give you the grand tour.
745
00:41:39,197 --> 00:41:42,065
Um...
746
00:41:42,067 --> 00:41:43,833
Uh, there's the kitchenette,
747
00:41:43,835 --> 00:41:46,803
um...The microwave oven,
748
00:41:46,805 --> 00:41:49,973
toaster oven, range top.
749
00:41:49,975 --> 00:41:53,042
And here's my bedroom.
750
00:41:53,044 --> 00:41:56,980
Motion of the ocean,
it's like sleeping in the womb.
751
00:41:56,982 --> 00:42:00,583
And then through the kitchenette
is the freedom room.
752
00:42:00,585 --> 00:42:02,352
That's for...Open debate
753
00:42:02,354 --> 00:42:05,388
and discourse
and just vegging out.
754
00:42:05,390 --> 00:42:10,193
Plus, I got directv,
so I watch "whale wars."
755
00:42:10,195 --> 00:42:14,898
-Well, it is
a very lovely home...Boat.
756
00:42:14,900 --> 00:42:18,568
-When Jeffy's mom left,
my whole perspective changed.
757
00:42:18,570 --> 00:42:20,003
And I just looked around,
758
00:42:20,005 --> 00:42:21,771
and I thought,
"do these advanced degrees
759
00:42:21,773 --> 00:42:23,706
hanging on the wall
mean anything?
760
00:42:23,708 --> 00:42:28,177
Does Volvo's safety record
mean anything?"
761
00:42:28,179 --> 00:42:29,879
I'm 15 years into
a 30-year mortgage
762
00:42:29,881 --> 00:42:32,582
and who cares?!
763
00:42:32,584 --> 00:42:35,051
It's prison.
764
00:42:35,053 --> 00:42:37,353
And little Jeffy sprouted
his little wings,
765
00:42:37,355 --> 00:42:39,022
flew the Coop, and that was it.
766
00:42:39,024 --> 00:42:40,890
I just...
767
00:42:40,892 --> 00:42:43,092
Didn't need to own anything,
didn't need to be anywhere,
768
00:42:43,094 --> 00:42:45,028
so I had a friend,
he had a boat,
769
00:42:45,030 --> 00:42:47,196
and I'm living the dream
for $375 a month,
770
00:42:47,198 --> 00:42:49,566
plus I gotta scrape
the barnacles off.
771
00:42:49,568 --> 00:42:51,901
-Okay, we gotta go, dad.
-Yeah, me, too.
772
00:42:51,903 --> 00:42:54,571
Don't be a stranger, okay,
unless that's your thing.
773
00:42:54,573 --> 00:42:55,872
All right, how about a hug.
774
00:42:55,874 --> 00:42:57,073
-Oh.
-Mm!
775
00:42:57,075 --> 00:42:58,641
-So nice to meet you.
776
00:42:58,643 --> 00:43:01,210
-Oh, my god. That feels good!
777
00:43:01,212 --> 00:43:03,146
Dang. Seriously.
778
00:43:03,148 --> 00:43:05,214
What do you gotta do
to score a fox like you?
779
00:43:05,216 --> 00:43:07,283
-Easy.
780
00:43:12,790 --> 00:43:14,223
-By left,
he meant left this earth.
781
00:43:14,225 --> 00:43:15,592
My mother's dead.
782
00:43:19,730 --> 00:43:21,264
-I'm sorry.
783
00:43:21,266 --> 00:43:23,533
-It was a long time ago.
784
00:43:25,302 --> 00:43:26,636
Should have just told you
earlier.
785
00:43:26,638 --> 00:43:29,272
I don't know why I didn't.
786
00:43:29,274 --> 00:43:32,241
-It's okay.
787
00:43:32,243 --> 00:43:34,243
-Yeah, thank god I only have
to see him once a month.
788
00:43:37,449 --> 00:43:38,982
You know...
-Yes.
789
00:43:38,984 --> 00:43:41,317
-No. Mnh-mnh.
790
00:43:50,362 --> 00:43:54,764
-Are you sure
he can't hear us?
791
00:43:54,766 --> 00:43:56,099
-Oh, no,
he can definitely hear us,
792
00:43:56,101 --> 00:43:59,435
I just told him not to listen.
793
00:44:00,804 --> 00:44:04,474
-Oh, no, I -- no, no.
I can't do this.
794
00:44:04,476 --> 00:44:06,142
-What do you mean you can't
do this? Yes, you can.
795
00:44:06,144 --> 00:44:07,677
-I can't do this.
-Yes, you can totally do this.
796
00:44:07,679 --> 00:44:09,278
You can absolutely --
-no.
797
00:44:09,280 --> 00:44:11,214
-Oh, come on. You can do it
in the bathroom of a bar
798
00:44:11,216 --> 00:44:14,951
or in the broom closet
of an office or in the car,
799
00:44:14,953 --> 00:44:17,687
but you can't do it
with little Curtis around.
800
00:44:17,689 --> 00:44:19,122
-No, no, listen -- listen.
801
00:44:19,124 --> 00:44:20,957
-Mm-hmm.
-They were strangers.
802
00:44:20,959 --> 00:44:24,627
I know Curtis,
i have to see him again.
803
00:44:24,629 --> 00:44:26,129
-Want to go to your place?
804
00:44:26,131 --> 00:44:28,364
-I would,
but it's after midnight
805
00:44:28,366 --> 00:44:29,465
and I have to work tomorrow.
806
00:44:29,467 --> 00:44:31,134
-Yeah, so?
807
00:44:31,136 --> 00:44:32,402
-Hey, hey, listen.
808
00:44:32,404 --> 00:44:34,537
How about I just a rain check
809
00:44:34,539 --> 00:44:37,807
for when Curtis is out of town
or something.
810
00:44:37,809 --> 00:44:39,475
-Fine, blue-ball me.
811
00:44:39,477 --> 00:44:41,144
-Ew.
Never, ever say that again.
812
00:44:41,146 --> 00:44:43,780
-Oh, don't ever do it again.
813
00:44:45,582 --> 00:44:47,817
-Oh, by the way,
what are you doing on Saturday?
814
00:44:47,819 --> 00:44:49,686
-Nothing, I don't think.
-Good.
815
00:44:49,688 --> 00:44:52,255
'Cause I plus-oned you to
this girl, Miranda's, wedding.
816
00:44:52,257 --> 00:44:53,856
I just started working with her,
817
00:44:53,858 --> 00:44:55,525
so it's kind of weird
that I even got an invite,
818
00:44:55,527 --> 00:44:57,060
but not surprising seeing
as though
819
00:44:57,062 --> 00:44:58,828
I get invited to everybody's
wedding,
820
00:44:58,830 --> 00:45:01,864
this being the sixth
of the year.
821
00:45:01,866 --> 00:45:03,666
-You plus-oned me to a --
to a wedding?
822
00:45:03,668 --> 00:45:06,836
-Yeah, free food, an open bar,
i figured you wouldn't mind.
823
00:45:06,838 --> 00:45:08,438
-You can't just plus-one
somebody to a wedding
824
00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:10,840
without asking
if they're available first.
825
00:45:10,842 --> 00:45:13,342
-I'm sorry, I didn't think
it would be a thing.
826
00:45:13,344 --> 00:45:15,778
-To -- to a wedding?
To a work person's wedding,
827
00:45:15,780 --> 00:45:17,447
and you think
i want to go hang out
828
00:45:17,449 --> 00:45:19,515
with a bunch of stiffs
i have nothing in common with?
829
00:45:19,517 --> 00:45:22,185
-Okay, first of all, they're not
stiffs, they're my friends.
830
00:45:22,187 --> 00:45:24,053
-Oh, and what do you do,
friend of Stephanie's?
831
00:45:24,055 --> 00:45:27,056
Oh, I fill in for you assholes
for about 1/10 of your salary
832
00:45:27,058 --> 00:45:28,891
whenever one of you has
a stress-related heart attack
833
00:45:28,893 --> 00:45:30,693
on your way to an early grave.
834
00:45:30,695 --> 00:45:33,930
-Wow, sometimes you can be
such a sad, judgy dick.
835
00:45:33,932 --> 00:45:35,598
-I'm a dick?
-Uh-huh!
836
00:45:35,600 --> 00:45:37,233
-You're the one
who plus-oned me to a wedding
837
00:45:37,235 --> 00:45:39,202
without even asking
if I was available first.
838
00:45:39,204 --> 00:45:40,770
-Okay, I'm sorry.
I should have asked.
839
00:45:40,772 --> 00:45:43,106
-Shocking people
even go to those things anymore.
840
00:45:43,108 --> 00:45:45,641
I mean, how can you sit there
celebrating two morons
841
00:45:45,643 --> 00:45:47,577
who are just gonna be divorced
in five years.
842
00:45:47,579 --> 00:45:49,278
And you don't
just invite yourself
843
00:45:49,280 --> 00:45:51,214
to meet somebody's dad,
by the way.
844
00:45:51,216 --> 00:45:52,715
If I wanted you
to meet that asshole,
845
00:45:52,717 --> 00:45:54,317
I would have invited you.
846
00:45:54,319 --> 00:45:56,619
I would have -- I would have
invited you to meet him.
847
00:45:56,621 --> 00:45:59,122
That's personal, okay?
-I'm sorry.
848
00:45:59,124 --> 00:46:00,456
I didn't even realize
that you felt that way.
849
00:46:00,458 --> 00:46:02,125
-And what the fuck
are you sending me
850
00:46:02,127 --> 00:46:04,093
a relationship request for?
851
00:46:04,095 --> 00:46:06,229
Guess what, Steph,
the world of social media
852
00:46:06,231 --> 00:46:08,664
does not give two shits
if we are in a relationship
853
00:46:08,666 --> 00:46:10,967
or complicated
or -- or whatever.
854
00:46:10,969 --> 00:46:13,102
And I'm sorry if I refuse
to take what we have
855
00:46:13,104 --> 00:46:14,604
and shout it to cyberspace
856
00:46:14,606 --> 00:46:16,472
so people can like it
or comment on it
857
00:46:16,474 --> 00:46:18,941
whenever we put up
a photo of ourselves!
858
00:46:18,943 --> 00:46:20,510
And then when we
inevitably break up,
859
00:46:20,512 --> 00:46:24,781
have those exact same people
like that status.
860
00:46:24,783 --> 00:46:27,250
You just over-step --
861
00:46:27,252 --> 00:46:29,352
a lot, and I think
you should work on that.
862
00:46:29,354 --> 00:46:32,088
-Excuse me?!
863
00:46:32,090 --> 00:46:33,689
-I'm saying this because I care.
864
00:46:33,691 --> 00:46:37,827
-What do we have, Jefferson?
What do we have?
865
00:46:37,829 --> 00:46:40,696
-W-- we have this.
We have us.
866
00:46:40,698 --> 00:46:42,465
Christ, what do you want, Steph?
867
00:46:42,467 --> 00:46:44,534
I feel like I've been expressly
clear about what I want,
868
00:46:44,536 --> 00:46:46,469
and you're the one
who's gone changing the deal.
869
00:46:46,471 --> 00:46:48,304
-That's life!
870
00:46:48,306 --> 00:46:50,473
Things grow and change
and evolve!
871
00:46:50,475 --> 00:46:53,643
Relationships grow
and change and evolve.
872
00:46:53,645 --> 00:46:55,378
I can't do this anymore.
873
00:46:55,380 --> 00:46:57,180
I don't want
to be just a fuck buddy.
874
00:46:57,182 --> 00:46:59,048
-Fuck buddy?
We're not even fucking.
875
00:46:59,050 --> 00:47:01,617
You're leaving, remember?
876
00:47:02,386 --> 00:47:04,720
-Oh, I am so done with this.
877
00:47:04,722 --> 00:47:06,322
And you know what?
878
00:47:06,324 --> 00:47:08,057
It might shock you,
but I'm actually looking for
879
00:47:08,059 --> 00:47:09,659
something way more than a label.
880
00:47:09,661 --> 00:47:12,295
I'm looking for
a fucking partner in crime.
881
00:47:12,297 --> 00:47:14,030
-That you can just
get tired of and dump?
882
00:47:14,032 --> 00:47:16,465
-I am not your ex-girlfriend!
883
00:47:16,467 --> 00:47:18,467
I'm not gonna go hide
in some other man's penis!
884
00:47:18,469 --> 00:47:21,537
-Tell that to Josh.
885
00:47:21,539 --> 00:47:24,740
-You are
a self-fulfilling prophesy.
886
00:47:24,742 --> 00:47:26,676
-Another label, thank you.
887
00:47:39,723 --> 00:47:42,391
-Go after here.
888
00:47:44,394 --> 00:47:47,763
Okay, don't, that's cool.
889
00:48:07,251 --> 00:48:09,185
-Mmm!
890
00:48:09,187 --> 00:48:10,553
This was heavenly!
891
00:48:10,555 --> 00:48:11,854
-What I tell you?
892
00:48:11,856 --> 00:48:15,091
Cupcakes are the panacea
for all ailments.
893
00:48:15,093 --> 00:48:18,261
-Yeah, but now instead
of feeling sad, I feel guilty.
894
00:48:18,263 --> 00:48:20,596
Fat.
-You'll get over it.
895
00:48:20,598 --> 00:48:23,299
-What the hell's
a panacea anyway?
896
00:48:23,301 --> 00:48:25,701
-It's Greek for cure-all.
897
00:48:25,703 --> 00:48:27,236
-How do you know that?
898
00:48:27,238 --> 00:48:30,039
-I'm Greek.
-No, you're not.
899
00:48:30,041 --> 00:48:31,974
Are you?
-Half.
900
00:48:31,976 --> 00:48:33,609
-Maybe he's right.
901
00:48:33,611 --> 00:48:36,045
Maybe we are too young
to be thinking about the future.
902
00:48:36,047 --> 00:48:37,413
We should just
live in the moment.
903
00:48:37,415 --> 00:48:39,081
-No.
904
00:48:39,083 --> 00:48:41,550
Spending your twenties,
like, sowing your wild oats
905
00:48:41,552 --> 00:48:43,386
or finding yourself
or whatever
906
00:48:43,388 --> 00:48:44,987
is a bunch of malarkey.
907
00:48:44,989 --> 00:48:47,256
All that leaves you is
a biological clock
908
00:48:47,258 --> 00:48:49,825
ticking in tall boots,
going on eharmony dates
909
00:48:49,827 --> 00:48:52,461
with men in their 40s who still
collect action figures.
910
00:48:52,463 --> 00:48:55,298
-Did you just say "malarkey"?
-I'm bringing it back.
911
00:48:55,300 --> 00:48:56,966
You know what we should do?
912
00:48:56,968 --> 00:49:01,771
We should get dressed
and call some boys and go out.
913
00:49:01,773 --> 00:49:04,140
-After this.
-Attagirl.
914
00:49:12,349 --> 00:49:14,617
-5, 6, 7, 8.
915
00:49:14,619 --> 00:49:16,786
One, three...
916
00:49:16,788 --> 00:49:18,788
5, 6, 7, 8.
917
00:49:18,790 --> 00:49:20,423
And good.
918
00:49:22,960 --> 00:49:25,027
Lift up.
919
00:49:25,029 --> 00:49:27,129
Stop, stop, stop.
920
00:49:27,131 --> 00:49:30,666
Please, stop.
Everyone, come here a second.
921
00:49:34,504 --> 00:49:37,373
-That's great, but maybe
we should save the accounting
922
00:49:37,375 --> 00:49:40,776
for the apartment.
923
00:49:40,778 --> 00:49:42,979
Why don't we just go
to mount hood next year?
924
00:49:42,981 --> 00:49:44,547
-Please, if there's one thing
we are definitely doing
925
00:49:44,549 --> 00:49:47,717
this year,
it is going to mount hood.
926
00:49:53,056 --> 00:49:56,058
-Are we maybe running away
from something?
927
00:50:02,133 --> 00:50:04,533
-Sometimes you have to
have something and lose it
928
00:50:04,535 --> 00:50:07,136
to know why you wanted it
or needed it.
929
00:50:09,506 --> 00:50:11,574
-Are you talking about beer?
930
00:50:11,576 --> 00:50:13,009
'Cause I could really use
a beer.
931
00:50:15,413 --> 00:50:20,049
-Well, if you consider
my movie collection a shrine...
932
00:50:20,051 --> 00:50:22,151
Uh-oh.
933
00:50:22,153 --> 00:50:23,686
-Uh-oh, what?
934
00:50:26,257 --> 00:50:28,524
-Shit!
935
00:50:28,526 --> 00:50:29,892
Shit!
936
00:50:32,363 --> 00:50:34,363
Shit!
937
00:50:34,365 --> 00:50:36,999
Shit!
Who's the guy she's with?
938
00:50:37,001 --> 00:50:40,436
-A guy.
-That asshole!
939
00:50:40,438 --> 00:50:41,704
I bet he sells things.
940
00:50:41,706 --> 00:50:43,906
-We're all selling something.
941
00:50:46,209 --> 00:50:48,177
-Yep.
942
00:50:49,546 --> 00:50:51,280
-That was kind of funny?
-Yeah.
943
00:50:51,282 --> 00:50:53,249
-A lot of disinfectant.
944
00:50:53,251 --> 00:50:55,751
-Hey, hey, hey.
945
00:50:55,753 --> 00:50:56,786
Amy, good to see you.
946
00:50:56,788 --> 00:50:58,220
-No.
947
00:50:58,222 --> 00:51:00,289
-Oh, you must be Matt.
948
00:51:00,291 --> 00:51:02,925
No, no, Jason.
Ryan?
949
00:51:02,927 --> 00:51:04,693
-Okay.
-So many, I get 'em confused.
950
00:51:04,695 --> 00:51:06,228
What are you doing here?
951
00:51:06,230 --> 00:51:08,197
-Same thing everyone else
is doing here, I guess.
952
00:51:08,199 --> 00:51:09,865
-Pretending to have a good time
in your desperate attempt
953
00:51:09,867 --> 00:51:11,634
to convince ourselves we belong?
954
00:51:11,636 --> 00:51:13,302
-We're having a few drinks.
955
00:51:13,304 --> 00:51:15,371
What are you doing here?
-Pretending to have a good time
956
00:51:15,373 --> 00:51:17,273
in a desperate attempt
to convince myself I bel--
957
00:51:17,275 --> 00:51:18,908
-have you met Blake?
-Hey, what's up, guy?
958
00:51:18,910 --> 00:51:20,476
How's sales?
-Oh, pretty good.
959
00:51:20,478 --> 00:51:21,977
-Oh, really,
'cause I don't see any coffee.
960
00:51:21,979 --> 00:51:24,847
And we all know
that coffee is for closers.
961
00:51:26,283 --> 00:51:29,819
Stupid "glengarry Glen Ross" --
great movie,
962
00:51:29,821 --> 00:51:31,620
one of her favorites if you're
trying to get in her pants.
963
00:51:31,622 --> 00:51:33,722
Hey, can I --
can we talk privately?
964
00:51:33,724 --> 00:51:37,059
-Do you mind?
-No, he's good. Come on.
965
00:51:40,397 --> 00:51:44,166
- I have no idea who Matt is.
966
00:51:46,436 --> 00:51:48,070
-Who's the guy?
-Just a guy.
967
00:51:48,072 --> 00:51:50,239
-Just a guy, huh?
-Just a guy.
968
00:51:50,241 --> 00:51:52,608
Sensitive, intelligent,
sense of humor, cute smile.
969
00:51:52,610 --> 00:51:54,510
-Cute butt?
-Oh, you noticed, too?
970
00:51:54,512 --> 00:51:55,811
-Oh, that thing
is impossible to miss.
971
00:51:55,813 --> 00:51:57,580
That's a pilates ass,
by the way.
972
00:51:57,582 --> 00:52:00,916
I can't believe you brought
a date here to our bar.
973
00:52:00,918 --> 00:52:03,352
-I just met him,
he's not a date.
974
00:52:03,354 --> 00:52:05,588
And I didn't realize
this was our bar.
975
00:52:05,590 --> 00:52:08,424
-You know, I remember
when I was just the guy.
976
00:52:08,426 --> 00:52:09,992
-Yeah.
977
00:52:09,994 --> 00:52:12,261
Sad, 'cause
now you're just an asshole.
978
00:52:12,263 --> 00:52:16,298
-You know, from the start --
from the start,
979
00:52:16,300 --> 00:52:19,668
I said that if this happened
between us,
980
00:52:19,670 --> 00:52:22,771
that...This would happen.
981
00:52:22,773 --> 00:52:24,473
-I'm glad he's here,
982
00:52:24,475 --> 00:52:26,809
'cause now I won't make
some stupid mistake with you.
983
00:52:26,811 --> 00:52:28,477
-That's good.
-It's good.
984
00:52:28,479 --> 00:52:30,446
-Good.
-It's good.
985
00:52:34,986 --> 00:52:38,554
-What kind of stupid mistake
are you talking about?
986
00:52:44,961 --> 00:52:47,029
Probably shouldn't have had
that extra beer.
987
00:53:31,275 --> 00:53:35,044
-Maybe me focus on that
instead of mount hood this year.
988
00:53:39,717 --> 00:53:42,885
-What? What are you
talking about right now?
989
00:53:42,887 --> 00:53:44,920
-Don't be mad.
990
00:53:44,922 --> 00:53:47,423
I just...
Want to spend more time
991
00:53:47,425 --> 00:53:49,792
trying to find myself.
992
00:53:49,794 --> 00:53:51,727
-That's what we do
on the mountain.
993
00:53:51,729 --> 00:53:53,295
-Right, no, we do.
994
00:53:53,297 --> 00:53:55,898
But I think I'm growing
beyond the mountain.
995
00:53:55,900 --> 00:53:58,133
-Beyond the mountain?
-Plus, my parents
996
00:53:58,135 --> 00:54:00,102
are hassling me
about not paying rent,
997
00:54:00,104 --> 00:54:01,570
especially for
the three or four months
998
00:54:01,572 --> 00:54:02,905
that I'm not even home.
999
00:54:02,907 --> 00:54:04,473
-So get a sublet.
1000
00:54:04,475 --> 00:54:05,774
That's what people do,
they get sublets.
1001
00:54:05,776 --> 00:54:07,776
I'll help you, okay?
-Right.
1002
00:54:07,778 --> 00:54:10,579
No, I know.
1003
00:54:10,581 --> 00:54:13,882
Also...I want to take
some more dance classes,
1004
00:54:13,884 --> 00:54:15,784
and that's pretty spendy.
1005
00:54:19,122 --> 00:54:21,790
-Dance classes?
1006
00:54:26,930 --> 00:54:30,899
This ski trip
is all I've wanted all year.
1007
00:54:30,901 --> 00:54:33,435
It is all I've been working
these mind-numbing,
1008
00:54:33,437 --> 00:54:36,305
soul-sucking jobs for.
1009
00:54:36,307 --> 00:54:40,175
And you're just gonna take it
away from me so you can dance?!
1010
00:54:40,177 --> 00:54:41,644
-You can have the money.
1011
00:54:41,646 --> 00:54:44,313
-It's not about the money,
asshole!
1012
00:54:44,315 --> 00:54:46,148
It's about the fucking plan!
1013
00:54:46,150 --> 00:54:47,950
You had a plan,
and you're not sticking to it!
1014
00:54:47,952 --> 00:54:49,852
-How am I an asshole
for just not doing
1015
00:54:49,854 --> 00:54:52,388
what you want me to do?!
-Fuck you!
1016
00:55:21,451 --> 00:55:23,218
-Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
1017
00:55:23,220 --> 00:55:25,354
Oh, yeah, yeah.
Oh.
1018
00:55:25,356 --> 00:55:28,657
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Oh, yeah.
1019
00:55:28,659 --> 00:55:32,394
Oh, fuck!
Oh, yeah. Oh! Oh!
1020
00:55:32,396 --> 00:55:35,297
Yeah! Yeah! Yeah, yeah!
I want it!
1021
00:55:35,299 --> 00:55:38,901
-Sorry, is it too loud?
Need me to headphone it?
1022
00:55:38,903 --> 00:55:41,670
I'll headphone it.
1023
00:55:45,408 --> 00:55:47,710
-Oh, hey, man.
1024
00:55:49,079 --> 00:55:51,647
-Dropped your shit.
1025
00:56:11,000 --> 00:56:14,370
-Wow. Cleaning.
1026
00:56:14,372 --> 00:56:17,239
-I'm having a friend come visit.
1027
00:56:17,241 --> 00:56:20,376
-We're having a friend come?
-Uh, from Canada.
1028
00:56:20,378 --> 00:56:22,511
I told her she could stay here,
so...
1029
00:56:22,513 --> 00:56:27,116
You know, she's going to come
in just a little while.
1030
00:56:27,118 --> 00:56:30,185
-From Canada.
-Yep.
1031
00:56:30,187 --> 00:56:33,021
-You need me to leave
for a while or...
1032
00:56:36,393 --> 00:56:38,460
-Yeah, or...
1033
00:56:38,462 --> 00:56:40,696
Yeah.
1034
00:56:42,565 --> 00:56:44,933
-You need me to move out?
1035
00:56:44,935 --> 00:56:46,635
-I think.
1036
00:56:46,637 --> 00:56:49,238
Maybe.
1037
00:56:49,240 --> 00:56:53,142
Yeah.
1038
00:56:53,144 --> 00:56:55,043
-Oh, that's cool.
1039
00:56:55,045 --> 00:56:57,446
That's cool, I get it.
1040
00:56:57,448 --> 00:56:59,782
All right, yeah.
You've been...
1041
00:56:59,784 --> 00:57:04,586
Very generous...
Letting me stay here this long.
1042
00:57:04,588 --> 00:57:07,823
Uh...
Thank your parents for me.
1043
00:57:07,825 --> 00:57:11,293
I'm gonna go...Get packing.
1044
00:57:11,295 --> 00:57:17,166
-You're still welcome to
swing by and hang if you want.
1045
00:57:17,168 --> 00:57:21,003
-Well, I have no one else,
so...
1046
00:57:22,238 --> 00:57:25,207
-Do you want me to make
some home-made ice cream?
1047
00:58:12,155 --> 00:58:13,789
-Sea lion war!
1048
00:58:13,791 --> 00:58:15,324
Sometimes they go at it
all night.
1049
00:58:15,326 --> 00:58:18,160
I just lay here listening.
1050
00:58:18,162 --> 00:58:21,363
Arf, arf! Arf, arf!
1051
00:58:21,365 --> 00:58:24,633
I love it! This is my pbs!
1052
00:58:26,469 --> 00:58:29,304
Arf, arf, arf, arf, arf!
1053
00:58:29,306 --> 00:58:31,707
I love it!
1054
00:58:46,089 --> 00:58:48,524
-So I've never really
worked with butt plugs before.
1055
00:58:48,526 --> 00:58:50,192
Is there anything I should know?
1056
00:58:50,194 --> 00:58:52,361
-We pride ourselves
on being a safe zone
1057
00:58:52,363 --> 00:58:55,364
for people to explore
and express their sexuality.
1058
00:58:55,366 --> 00:58:57,232
What we don't want
is those dirty raincoat-ers
1059
00:58:57,234 --> 00:58:59,701
coming in, looking at our boxes
for an hour,
1060
00:58:59,703 --> 00:59:02,337
and then going to jerk it
in the alleyway.
1061
00:59:02,339 --> 00:59:04,873
-So my job is to keep browsing
and masturbating to a minimum.
1062
00:59:04,875 --> 00:59:07,342
-Shit, those have been recalled.
1063
00:59:07,344 --> 00:59:09,611
-So how long
you been working here?
1064
00:59:09,613 --> 00:59:11,880
-About a year. But it's not
like I'm gonna move up.
1065
00:59:11,882 --> 00:59:15,250
I've already hit the glass
ceiling.
1066
00:59:15,252 --> 00:59:18,654
-You mean the mirrored ceiling.
1067
00:59:24,361 --> 00:59:26,461
-Oh, you got it.
1068
00:59:26,463 --> 00:59:29,264
-You are bad!
I gotta watch out for you.
1069
00:59:29,266 --> 00:59:30,933
So bad.
1070
00:59:30,935 --> 00:59:33,235
-Bet you get hit on relentlessly
at a place like this.
1071
00:59:33,237 --> 00:59:35,804
-Yeah, but no one
ever takes me seriously.
1072
00:59:35,806 --> 00:59:39,474
But it's not like I'm looking
for anything serious, so...
1073
00:59:39,476 --> 00:59:41,710
-Thank you! That's the kind
of girl I'd love to go out with.
1074
00:59:45,648 --> 00:59:48,317
-You would love to go out
with me?
1075
00:59:48,319 --> 00:59:49,785
-I was just saying.
1076
00:59:49,787 --> 00:59:51,420
-Oh, my gosh,
are you serious right now?
1077
00:59:51,422 --> 00:59:53,055
You --
you better not be kidding!
1078
00:59:53,057 --> 00:59:54,623
You're not kidding, right?
You're serious, right?
1079
00:59:54,625 --> 00:59:57,459
You're serious?!
1080
00:59:57,461 --> 00:59:59,094
-I mean...
1081
00:59:59,096 --> 01:00:00,495
Would you want to go out
with me?
1082
01:00:00,497 --> 01:00:01,997
-Yes! Yeah, I would!
1083
01:00:01,999 --> 01:00:04,132
I do! Yes, I do.
Yes.
1084
01:00:04,134 --> 01:00:06,435
You're not kidding, right?
1085
01:00:06,437 --> 01:00:08,737
-I mean, it's probably not wise,
1086
01:00:08,739 --> 01:00:12,507
seeing as, like, you're my boss.
1087
01:00:12,509 --> 01:00:15,243
-Oh.
1088
01:00:15,245 --> 01:00:17,446
Oh. Yeah.
1089
01:00:17,448 --> 01:00:20,749
Yeah, that, yeah.
1090
01:00:21,117 --> 01:00:22,784
-But, like, if you want to.
1091
01:00:22,786 --> 01:00:25,487
-Yes! Oh, my gosh, please!
Yes, yes, are you serious?
1092
01:00:25,489 --> 01:00:26,955
I want to go out and drink.
1093
01:00:26,957 --> 01:00:28,123
Oh, I might have to fire you
first, though.
1094
01:00:28,125 --> 01:00:29,625
-Huh?
-I'm kidding, I won't.
1095
01:00:29,627 --> 01:00:31,460
I'm kidding.
But anyway, I don't know.
1096
01:00:31,462 --> 01:00:33,528
So.
1097
01:00:33,530 --> 01:00:34,930
Wow. Okay.
1098
01:00:34,932 --> 01:00:37,933
Yes.
1099
01:00:41,704 --> 01:00:44,306
-Yo, Curtis?
1100
01:00:44,308 --> 01:00:46,541
Knock, knock.
1101
01:00:46,543 --> 01:00:50,045
You would not believe the job
i just got.
1102
01:00:52,148 --> 01:00:55,450
Curtis?
1103
01:00:57,120 --> 01:00:58,687
Curtis?
1104
01:00:58,689 --> 01:01:01,289
-Natalie Simmons is dead.
1105
01:01:02,692 --> 01:01:03,825
-Wait.
1106
01:01:03,827 --> 01:01:06,061
Wait, high school
Natalie Simmons?
1107
01:01:06,063 --> 01:01:09,064
The cheerleader with the wonky
Isabella rossellini teeth?
1108
01:01:09,066 --> 01:01:12,134
-She was eaten by a bear.
1109
01:01:12,136 --> 01:01:14,836
-Natalie Simmons
was eaten by a bear?
1110
01:01:14,838 --> 01:01:17,305
-In shoshone national park.
1111
01:01:17,307 --> 01:01:19,174
It's a statistical
improbability,
1112
01:01:19,176 --> 01:01:23,478
yet Natalie Simmons
was eaten by a bear.
1113
01:01:23,480 --> 01:01:25,847
-Wow.
1114
01:01:25,849 --> 01:01:29,017
Shit, I really liked her.
I liked her teeth.
1115
01:01:29,019 --> 01:01:32,888
-She was right next
to Allison in the yearbook.
1116
01:01:32,890 --> 01:01:35,157
-That's a strange coincidence.
1117
01:01:35,159 --> 01:01:38,360
-Death is working its way
outward from the "s's,"
1118
01:01:38,362 --> 01:01:41,697
and eventually,
it's going to get us all.
1119
01:01:41,699 --> 01:01:45,267
You just never know when a bear
is gonna pop out and eat you.
1120
01:01:46,602 --> 01:01:49,204
-You could avoid going to places
where bears are.
1121
01:01:49,206 --> 01:01:51,173
-The proverbial bear.
1122
01:01:51,175 --> 01:01:55,844
Eaten by the proverbial bear!
1123
01:01:58,182 --> 01:02:00,415
I missed you, too.
1124
01:02:05,221 --> 01:02:08,857
I wonder what Stephanie's up to
right now.
1125
01:02:10,226 --> 01:02:12,094
-When's the last time
you talked to her?
1126
01:02:12,096 --> 01:02:14,896
-When we saw her at the bar.
1127
01:02:14,898 --> 01:02:16,932
I befouled it, man.
1128
01:02:16,934 --> 01:02:18,366
I totally befouled it.
1129
01:02:18,368 --> 01:02:22,671
-She's probably at home,
wondering about you.
1130
01:02:23,439 --> 01:02:25,741
-See these new
rossignol super 7s?
1131
01:02:25,743 --> 01:02:28,910
Supposed to cut powder
like butter.
1132
01:02:28,912 --> 01:02:31,747
-You're still planning
on mount hood?
1133
01:02:31,749 --> 01:02:35,083
It's the only thing
i have left to look forward to.
1134
01:02:35,085 --> 01:02:37,986
So...Uh...
1135
01:02:37,988 --> 01:02:41,189
-Unh-unh. No.
1136
01:02:44,794 --> 01:02:50,465
I'll miss you, Natalie Simmons.
1137
01:02:52,935 --> 01:02:55,237
-Yes.
-Come on.
1138
01:02:55,239 --> 01:02:58,140
-Ooh. God.
-See?
1139
01:02:58,142 --> 01:03:00,142
-Jesus.
1140
01:03:00,144 --> 01:03:03,278
-We're gonna have so much fun.
-So much. All the fun.
1141
01:03:03,280 --> 01:03:06,181
-Can dress each other up.
-Dress up each other?
1142
01:03:07,818 --> 01:03:10,852
We should probably get some help
though, because...
1143
01:03:10,854 --> 01:03:12,087
-Hey, dude.
1144
01:03:16,794 --> 01:03:19,261
-Yes. Hello, I can help you.
Can I help you?
1145
01:03:19,263 --> 01:03:22,564
-Um, we were looking
to upgrade her vibrator.
1146
01:03:25,768 --> 01:03:27,803
-She currently owns a vibrator.
1147
01:03:27,805 --> 01:03:30,005
Um, do you know, like, what size
or do you know what kind?
1148
01:03:30,007 --> 01:03:31,473
-It's a little one.
1149
01:03:31,475 --> 01:03:35,777
It makes like a noise like...
Mee! Mee!
1150
01:03:35,779 --> 01:03:37,312
-Right, and it's just not quite
getting the job done, right?
1151
01:03:37,314 --> 01:03:39,314
Meee! Meee!
1152
01:03:39,316 --> 01:03:42,284
Isn't quite doing it.
And you need this device?
1153
01:03:42,286 --> 01:03:43,985
You can't bring her
to completion on your own?
1154
01:03:43,987 --> 01:03:45,620
-Oh, no,
it's like a new addition.
1155
01:03:45,622 --> 01:03:46,988
Like, we're...
1156
01:03:46,990 --> 01:03:48,356
When she likes to go down.
1157
01:03:48,358 --> 01:03:50,392
Down...Down there.
1158
01:03:50,394 --> 01:03:53,595
-She -- she goes down for you?
1159
01:03:54,831 --> 01:03:56,631
-Right, like a -- like a blowie.
1160
01:03:56,633 --> 01:03:58,166
-Oh.
1161
01:03:58,168 --> 01:04:00,168
-So you got --
so you got one that goes "meee!"
1162
01:04:00,170 --> 01:04:03,004
And you want to go, like
"rah!" Or "errr!"
1163
01:04:03,006 --> 01:04:06,575
While she's...Performing.
1164
01:04:06,577 --> 01:04:08,176
-Yes.
-Let me ask you something.
1165
01:04:08,178 --> 01:04:09,578
How long
have you two been together?
1166
01:04:09,580 --> 01:04:11,847
-Not important.
-Eight years.
1167
01:04:11,849 --> 01:04:15,350
-Eight years.
1168
01:04:15,352 --> 01:04:17,686
Wow!
-We recently just took a break,
1169
01:04:17,688 --> 01:04:19,354
and i-i think
it really strengthened us.
1170
01:04:19,356 --> 01:04:21,523
-Yeah, made me realize
what's important.
1171
01:04:21,525 --> 01:04:25,360
Which is why we are here
trying out some fun new toys.
1172
01:04:25,362 --> 01:04:28,330
Anyways, when you have someone
like her, you gotta...
1173
01:04:28,332 --> 01:04:30,398
You gotta fight for it.
-Absolutely.
1174
01:04:30,400 --> 01:04:32,200
But now you're having trouble
sexually satisfying each other,
1175
01:04:32,202 --> 01:04:33,668
so you're here
buying a little help.
1176
01:04:33,670 --> 01:04:36,104
Okay, let's see what we can do.
Follow me.
1177
01:04:36,106 --> 01:04:38,206
Okay, so I'm guessing
from your description
1178
01:04:38,208 --> 01:04:40,275
that this is the bad boy
she had before.
1179
01:04:40,277 --> 01:04:42,043
-Wow, yeah, man, that's it.
1180
01:04:42,045 --> 01:04:44,212
-Okay, so let me direct
your attention to this bad boy.
1181
01:04:44,214 --> 01:04:47,215
It has all the latest
in dildonic technology.
1182
01:04:47,217 --> 01:04:49,384
Variable speeds,
you can go from meee!,
1183
01:04:49,386 --> 01:04:51,519
to rah!,
to dugga-dugga-dugga-dugga,
1184
01:04:51,521 --> 01:04:54,689
depending on your -- excuse me,
her desire for stimulation.
1185
01:04:54,691 --> 01:04:57,959
-Uh...I don't know.
1186
01:04:57,961 --> 01:04:59,728
Babe, I don't know.
What do you think?
1187
01:04:59,730 --> 01:05:01,696
It's your orgasm.
1188
01:05:02,765 --> 01:05:05,867
What do you think?
1189
01:05:07,436 --> 01:05:09,571
-I think while you and the guy
from "police academy" decide
1190
01:05:09,573 --> 01:05:12,107
which sound effect
works best on my clitoris,
1191
01:05:12,109 --> 01:05:14,242
I'm gonna go across the street
to chipotle,
1192
01:05:14,244 --> 01:05:17,679
hope that they have alcohol,
and go get drunk in my car.
1193
01:05:22,318 --> 01:05:23,785
- "Police academy"?
1194
01:05:23,787 --> 01:05:25,453
-Why don't I show you a couple
other things
1195
01:05:25,455 --> 01:05:27,389
I think she might like.
Pretty sure I know her type.
1196
01:05:27,391 --> 01:05:29,591
Let's start with some handcuffs.
1197
01:05:29,593 --> 01:05:31,660
-All right, all right.
1198
01:05:33,796 --> 01:05:35,597
-You give him blow jobs?
-Hello!
1199
01:05:35,599 --> 01:05:37,465
-Ha! You give him blowies?
I thought you don't do that.
1200
01:05:37,467 --> 01:05:40,936
-I don't. It was something
special that I did with him.
1201
01:05:40,938 --> 01:05:42,971
-Do you even have lockjaw?
1202
01:05:42,973 --> 01:05:44,439
-That's what made it special.
1203
01:05:44,441 --> 01:05:48,109
I suffered for his pleasure.
1204
01:05:48,111 --> 01:05:51,479
-Oh, god!
-It was personal!
1205
01:05:51,481 --> 01:05:54,115
I don't know
what you want me to say.
1206
01:05:54,117 --> 01:05:57,118
-I miss you.
-It's hard to miss someone
1207
01:05:57,120 --> 01:06:00,588
when you're busy
living in the moment.
1208
01:06:00,590 --> 01:06:02,424
Sorry.
1209
01:06:02,426 --> 01:06:04,092
I was trying to be somebody
I'm not.
1210
01:06:04,094 --> 01:06:05,460
I like being in a relationship.
1211
01:06:05,462 --> 01:06:08,697
I like being in something
that's defined.
1212
01:06:08,699 --> 01:06:12,000
-I'm -- I'm ready for that now.
1213
01:06:12,935 --> 01:06:15,270
Let's do it.
Let's do it, I'm ready. Okay?
1214
01:06:15,272 --> 01:06:18,506
-It's so funny how you feel
this way after I leave.
1215
01:06:22,445 --> 01:06:25,213
-Sometimes you have to have
something and lose it
1216
01:06:25,215 --> 01:06:28,316
in order to understand
why you want or need it.
1217
01:06:28,318 --> 01:06:31,119
-And that's how I feel
about Josh.
1218
01:06:33,656 --> 01:06:36,024
-Please, just give this
another chance.
1219
01:06:36,026 --> 01:06:38,026
I know we have something, okay,
1220
01:06:38,028 --> 01:06:41,663
and you know we have something.
1221
01:06:41,665 --> 01:06:43,331
Please,
just give this another chance.
1222
01:06:43,333 --> 01:06:45,166
I-i-i this is gonna be
a clean start, okay?
1223
01:06:45,168 --> 01:06:47,168
Let's just -- let's just do --
I'll change the --
1224
01:06:47,170 --> 01:06:49,237
I'll change the relationship
status. I'll accept it.
1225
01:06:49,239 --> 01:06:51,673
We'll -- let's do it.
Let's do it your way.
1226
01:06:51,675 --> 01:06:54,075
-Jefferson...
1227
01:06:54,077 --> 01:06:56,511
It's over.
1228
01:06:56,513 --> 01:06:58,213
-Stop it!
1229
01:06:58,215 --> 01:06:59,848
Don't say it's over.
1230
01:06:59,850 --> 01:07:02,083
I am here, and I'm asking you
for another chance.
1231
01:07:02,085 --> 01:07:04,686
This does not have to be over.
-Jefferson!
1232
01:07:04,688 --> 01:07:06,755
-This can be a clean start.
No, this can --
1233
01:07:06,757 --> 01:07:09,591
-it's over.
-No, let's --
1234
01:07:17,033 --> 01:07:18,967
I love you.
1235
01:07:46,796 --> 01:07:48,963
-Okay.
1236
01:07:51,601 --> 01:07:53,568
-Bye.
1237
01:08:08,919 --> 01:08:10,819
Buddy, hello?
1238
01:08:10,821 --> 01:08:14,456
-These Tibetan monks
spend 12 painstaking months
1239
01:08:14,458 --> 01:08:16,925
creating these mandalas
with colored sand,
1240
01:08:16,927 --> 01:08:20,995
and I mean one grain at time.
1241
01:08:20,997 --> 01:08:25,100
The lama comes,
and he inspects each mandala,
1242
01:08:25,102 --> 01:08:27,102
and he gives his holy nod
of approval.
1243
01:08:27,104 --> 01:08:29,737
And then
he whisks the sand away,
1244
01:08:29,739 --> 01:08:33,341
just brushes it with a graceful
of his hand,
1245
01:08:33,343 --> 01:08:36,811
leaving behind just a smudge
of nothingness.
1246
01:08:43,453 --> 01:08:46,921
-Somebody I know
was eaten by a bear.
1247
01:08:46,923 --> 01:08:48,790
I'm working at a whack shack,
1248
01:08:48,792 --> 01:08:50,825
and I irrevocably fucked up
the one relationship
1249
01:08:50,827 --> 01:08:53,962
I had in my life
that actually mattered,
1250
01:08:53,964 --> 01:08:55,430
and you're talking to me
1251
01:08:55,432 --> 01:08:59,000
about the impermanence
of sand mandalas?
1252
01:08:59,002 --> 01:09:02,537
-Hey, it's not
about the mandalas themselves,
1253
01:09:02,539 --> 01:09:04,873
it's about --
-i know what it's about.
1254
01:09:04,875 --> 01:09:06,708
You're ridiculous.
1255
01:09:06,710 --> 01:09:09,144
You're 50 years old, you live
on a boat that you don't own.
1256
01:09:09,146 --> 01:09:11,212
-I know it's
an unbelievable life.
1257
01:09:11,214 --> 01:09:14,549
-Unbelievably sad!
1258
01:09:14,551 --> 01:09:17,552
You just gave up, dad.
1259
01:09:18,454 --> 01:09:19,621
-Oh, wow.
1260
01:09:19,623 --> 01:09:20,855
Okay, Jeffy, I get it.
1261
01:09:20,857 --> 01:09:22,323
You know,
you have your perspective,
1262
01:09:22,325 --> 01:09:25,860
but I'm over here with mine,
and it's cool.
1263
01:09:25,862 --> 01:09:27,729
No one's right, no one's wrong.
1264
01:09:27,731 --> 01:09:30,665
-No, dad, you...Have to...
1265
01:09:30,667 --> 01:09:33,835
Always wrap everything up
in some new-age psycho-babble
1266
01:09:33,837 --> 01:09:35,303
self-help doublespeak
that no one understands,
1267
01:09:35,305 --> 01:09:38,239
including yourself.
1268
01:09:38,241 --> 01:09:40,808
-I am that.
-See?!
1269
01:09:40,810 --> 01:09:43,511
You always say that!
"I am that." What is that?
1270
01:09:43,513 --> 01:09:45,547
I-i-it's like y-you think
you're empathizing,
1271
01:09:45,549 --> 01:09:47,549
but really what you're doing
is invalidating
1272
01:09:47,551 --> 01:09:50,018
anybody's sense of self.
1273
01:09:50,020 --> 01:09:52,253
It's maddening. I'm mad.
1274
01:09:52,255 --> 01:09:54,656
You're fucking high, as usual.
1275
01:09:56,859 --> 01:09:59,227
- I am that.
1276
01:10:05,201 --> 01:10:07,502
-Strange
that I feel completely adrift
1277
01:10:07,504 --> 01:10:09,103
in every aspect of my life.
1278
01:10:09,105 --> 01:10:12,440
-Man, you set me up
for that one.
1279
01:10:12,442 --> 01:10:15,843
Jeffy, where you going?
1280
01:10:15,845 --> 01:10:18,246
-To not be you.
1281
01:12:07,189 --> 01:12:09,724
-Good night, pappy.
1282
01:12:29,345 --> 01:12:32,547
-Oh, my goodness.
1283
01:12:40,189 --> 01:12:42,824
-I can't believe
you're missing my debut.
1284
01:12:42,826 --> 01:12:45,360
-Sorry, man, I just can't go
if Stephanie's gonna be there.
1285
01:12:45,362 --> 01:12:47,362
Why would you invite her?
1286
01:12:47,364 --> 01:12:50,698
-I just sent out a mass invite
to everyone I know.
1287
01:12:50,700 --> 01:12:53,668
Plus, I thought you guys
might get back together,
1288
01:12:53,670 --> 01:12:56,537
so I might have sent her
a special e-mail
1289
01:12:56,539 --> 01:12:58,740
asking her to come.
1290
01:12:58,742 --> 01:13:01,442
-Curtis, do me a favor and just
don't ever try and help, okay?
1291
01:13:01,444 --> 01:13:03,544
-Don't you think
that she's going in hopes
1292
01:13:03,546 --> 01:13:04,846
that you might be there?
1293
01:13:04,848 --> 01:13:06,247
-No, I think she's coming
1294
01:13:06,249 --> 01:13:07,548
because she's
a completely decent person
1295
01:13:07,550 --> 01:13:09,050
who wants to support you.
1296
01:13:09,052 --> 01:13:10,918
That's fine,
I'll just come to the next one.
1297
01:13:10,920 --> 01:13:12,687
-Mmm.
1298
01:13:12,689 --> 01:13:14,355
One and done, my friend.
1299
01:13:14,357 --> 01:13:16,691
My parents are cutting me off.
1300
01:13:16,693 --> 01:13:19,560
I have to get a real job.
1301
01:13:19,562 --> 01:13:22,096
They were pretty pissed
when they found out
1302
01:13:22,098 --> 01:13:26,601
that I was spending my money
on dance classes.
1303
01:13:26,603 --> 01:13:29,771
-What about having the soul
of an artist and all that?
1304
01:13:29,773 --> 01:13:31,439
-It's cool.
1305
01:13:31,441 --> 01:13:33,274
It's time to grow up.
1306
01:13:33,276 --> 01:13:36,577
Besides, dance classes are kind
of silly anyway.
1307
01:13:57,833 --> 01:14:00,168
-Schmancy!
1308
01:14:00,170 --> 01:14:02,637
How can you afford this
on what we're paying you?
1309
01:14:02,639 --> 01:14:05,940
-Well, I was actually kind
of hoping we'd go Dutch.
1310
01:14:05,942 --> 01:14:07,842
-You're funny.
1311
01:14:07,844 --> 01:14:10,411
That was the first thing
i noticed about you.
1312
01:14:10,413 --> 01:14:13,247
You're really...Funny.
1313
01:14:13,249 --> 01:14:16,250
-Ha. I...Was actually
only half-joking --
1314
01:14:16,252 --> 01:14:18,319
Dutch joking, if you will.
1315
01:14:26,495 --> 01:14:29,597
Well, what was the first thing
you noticed about me?
1316
01:14:31,667 --> 01:14:33,201
- Your tits.
1317
01:15:00,829 --> 01:15:02,230
Are you okay?
1318
01:15:05,168 --> 01:15:07,301
-I'm...I'm sorry.
1319
01:15:07,303 --> 01:15:09,737
I'm sorry.
1320
01:15:09,739 --> 01:15:14,509
Just guys never take me out
on, like, a real date, you know,
1321
01:15:14,511 --> 01:15:20,381
and, I mean, I'm just...
I --
1322
01:15:20,383 --> 01:15:23,084
thank you.
1323
01:15:23,086 --> 01:15:26,387
Thank you.
1324
01:15:26,389 --> 01:15:29,590
-Yeah, yeah, no problem.
1325
01:15:32,828 --> 01:15:36,397
-Shit, fuck, motherfucker!
1326
01:15:40,169 --> 01:15:43,271
- All right!
1327
01:15:43,273 --> 01:15:45,006
All right, yeah, man.
Dig it.
1328
01:15:45,008 --> 01:15:47,942
Let's keep it going
for x Javier, huh?
1329
01:15:47,944 --> 01:15:50,444
You guys are in
for a real treat tonight.
1330
01:15:50,446 --> 01:15:54,382
We've got a first-timer
here on our open-Mike stage --
1331
01:15:54,384 --> 01:15:57,552
Curtis ashante!
1332
01:16:00,289 --> 01:16:02,456
-Thank you.
1333
01:16:05,193 --> 01:16:07,595
Hi, everybody.
1334
01:16:07,597 --> 01:16:14,101
This is my movement poem called
"eaten by the proverbial bear."
1335
01:16:19,942 --> 01:16:21,909
-So do you want to make out
or something?
1336
01:16:21,911 --> 01:16:23,210
-Mmm.
1337
01:16:23,212 --> 01:16:25,580
I kind of do
and I kind of don't.
1338
01:16:25,582 --> 01:16:27,448
-No pressure.
1339
01:16:27,450 --> 01:16:31,252
Just so you know, I'm --
I'm open to it.
1340
01:16:31,254 --> 01:16:32,820
-My best friend's
having a show right now
1341
01:16:32,822 --> 01:16:37,058
and I'm missing it because
there's this girl, and...
1342
01:16:37,060 --> 01:16:38,793
We were friends,
and we were more than friends,
1343
01:16:38,795 --> 01:16:41,796
and anyway,
she's going, so I'm not.
1344
01:16:41,798 --> 01:16:44,632
-You're missing your best
friend's show because of a girl?
1345
01:16:44,634 --> 01:16:46,167
-Yeah.
1346
01:16:46,169 --> 01:16:47,568
-That's so shitty.
1347
01:16:47,570 --> 01:16:49,670
-I know.
1348
01:16:49,672 --> 01:16:51,606
-But, I mean,
if we're not gonna make out,
1349
01:16:51,608 --> 01:16:54,408
I mean, what do you want to do,
because I made up this new rule,
1350
01:16:54,410 --> 01:16:56,477
no sex before kissing first.
1351
01:16:56,479 --> 01:16:58,813
-Fuck, what am I doing?
-That's what I was saying!
1352
01:16:58,815 --> 01:17:01,015
That's why I made up
this new rule.
1353
01:17:01,017 --> 01:17:03,117
-You wouldn't want to go see my
friend's solo dance performance
1354
01:17:03,119 --> 01:17:05,586
that he choreographed himself
at a local dive bar, would you?
1355
01:17:05,588 --> 01:17:07,288
-Yeah.
-Really?
1356
01:17:07,290 --> 01:17:09,090
-Yeah.
-Thank you.
1357
01:17:09,092 --> 01:17:12,126
-Mm-hmm. And, I mean, if you
want to make out after, I can.
1358
01:17:12,128 --> 01:17:14,528
I pretty much
make out with anybody.
1359
01:17:36,119 --> 01:17:37,718
-I'm gonna go to
the bathroom real quick, okay?
1360
01:19:39,274 --> 01:19:41,275
-Your local ski report
is brought to you
1361
01:19:41,277 --> 01:19:43,244
by big sky tires.
1362
01:19:43,246 --> 01:19:46,413
-On mount hood, no new snow
in the last 24 hours.
1363
01:19:46,415 --> 01:19:47,848
Timberline
is operating seven chairs
1364
01:19:47,850 --> 01:19:49,316
with a 36-inch base.
1365
01:19:49,318 --> 01:19:51,185
Meadows is reporting
a 32-inch base
1366
01:19:51,187 --> 01:19:53,120
with 9 of the 14 lifts running.
1367
01:19:53,122 --> 01:19:55,022
And with a 28-inch base,
1368
01:19:55,024 --> 01:19:56,757
skibowl has seven
of their chairs making the trip
1369
01:19:56,759 --> 01:19:58,659
for the first time this season.
1370
01:19:58,661 --> 01:20:00,694
The weather will be clear
and warm with snow-free roads
1371
01:20:00,696 --> 01:20:02,363
all the way up to the lodges.
1372
01:20:02,365 --> 01:20:03,998
So grab a friend
and head up to the mountain
1373
01:20:04,000 --> 01:20:05,966
for a great day of skiing.
1374
01:20:05,968 --> 01:20:08,269
-And, of course, as always,
when you make that trip,
1375
01:20:08,271 --> 01:20:10,437
make sure you make it
on big sky tires,
1376
01:20:10,439 --> 01:20:13,007
the all-weather tire
that gives you peace of mind
1377
01:20:13,009 --> 01:20:14,775
every time you drive.
1378
01:20:55,684 --> 01:20:57,651
-Yeah, I mean,
i do like the beach a lot.
1379
01:20:57,653 --> 01:21:01,088
I like living near the water's
always one of those things
1380
01:21:01,090 --> 01:21:02,890
that is like a must.
1381
01:21:02,892 --> 01:21:06,594
You know, that's why,
you know, I couldn't, like...
1382
01:21:06,596 --> 01:21:09,029
Hey.
-Hey.
1383
01:21:09,031 --> 01:21:13,100
-What are you doing back?
-I came here to give you this.
1384
01:21:14,703 --> 01:21:16,871
-What is this?
-It's dance classes.
1385
01:21:16,873 --> 01:21:19,039
Don't say anything,
just take it.
1386
01:21:19,041 --> 01:21:22,209
-You are my friend.
1387
01:21:22,211 --> 01:21:23,377
-Oh! Okay.
1388
01:21:23,379 --> 01:21:27,047
I...I am that.
1389
01:21:27,049 --> 01:21:28,415
-Oh, where are my manners?
1390
01:21:28,417 --> 01:21:30,918
This is my friend,
Chloe, from Canada.
1391
01:21:30,920 --> 01:21:33,554
-Chloe from Canada.
1392
01:21:33,556 --> 01:21:37,124
-And this is my friend, Gloria.
1393
01:21:37,126 --> 01:21:39,526
-Hi. Sorry, I was trying
to get a drink.
1394
01:21:39,528 --> 01:21:41,128
That bartender hates me.
1395
01:21:41,130 --> 01:21:43,397
-Did you ask him.
-Ask me what?
1396
01:21:43,399 --> 01:21:45,366
-Okay, you have to
settle this for us.
1397
01:21:45,368 --> 01:21:46,934
They're trying to say
that Godzilla is a female,
1398
01:21:46,936 --> 01:21:49,436
but there's no way.
-There's totally a way.
1399
01:21:49,438 --> 01:21:52,072
-Okay, it has a kid
in "Godzilla's revenge," but --
1400
01:21:52,074 --> 01:21:54,275
-that hardly
qualifies as a movie.
1401
01:21:54,277 --> 01:21:56,710
-Exactly. Thank you.
1402
01:21:59,881 --> 01:22:02,049
-Ha.
1403
01:22:02,051 --> 01:22:04,485
Let me, uh, buy you a drink.
-Yeah.
1404
01:22:04,487 --> 01:22:08,055
-Yeah. Um, okay, question,
Godzilla versus king Kong?
1405
01:22:08,057 --> 01:22:09,757
-King Kong.
1406
01:22:09,759 --> 01:22:11,292
-Yes!
1407
01:22:12,305 --> 01:22:18,795
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