Original subtitles

["Tarantella Di San Michele" playing"]

[bright electronic theme playing]

I'm gonna be hungover all day.

I know.

What threw me off this morning was that I was in your shorts and no underwear.

"Eww! I need underwear on!"

Last night…

Let's go back…

In high school…

[laughs] In high school, I met my first love. And that is…

Greta.

I cheated on her in high school…

with a girl that really wasn't worth it.

So you can say I was a shit.

So, what do you think…

of our…

"interaction?"

-Us? -Yeah.

Well, is this a secret thing, or…?

I know we're sleeping together,

but I always question, like…

once we're in public, we're different, right?

Greta and I have an understanding, you know what I'm saying?

It's complicated.

Yes, we're together, but we're not.

I hate seeing you in public because I don't know what to do.

Do I say hi? Do I hug?

Do I ignore you?

We talk to each other like we're friends

in public…

But in private…

we have a different way.

[producer] So you've been sleeping together this whole time?

It's like, I want a relationship with you. I can see it,

but I don't want to because I can't trust. I have trust issues.

For me, in high school, my decision in high school fucked everything up.

Real talk.

But like, I'm sorry,

can I be honest? Can I be really honest with you?

Please do.

I've been single since we broke up, you know what I'm saying?

So I became accustomed to that schedule where I do my thing.

That's where I'm at, honestly.

I'm not trying to be a dickhead about it, but…

But what's really on your mind?

What are you thinking?

I'm still a little…

My guard is up for some reason.

I love Greta…

but…

am I afraid of getting hurt?

Yes.

I'm terrified of getting hurt.

I know I love you and I know you love me.

Can we stop talking about my feelings now?

[electronic beat playing]

["Graduation" playing]

[phone ringing]

Hi.

Hi, hello.

Come out tonight.

No.

I have to play tomorrow. I'm not doing anything.

But it's Homecoming.

I don't drink the week of the game

and the game is tomorrow.

During Homecoming from Saturday through the week,

it's fun all day!

["My Energy" playing]

[crowd cheering]

♪ You can't knock me off my energy ♪

It's non-stop drinking and craziness.

♪ Ping pong champ with a Kool-Aid throw when I'm cool laid back want hit this… ♪

Sunday through Friday, no drinking.

Game day tomorrow.

Good boy.

Yes, very much.

I guess.

-I guess. -[Dalton laughs]

Bye.

See ya.

["The Good Life" playing]

[crowd cheering]

[players chanting]

[player 9 screams]

♪ You didn't want it this way ♪

♪ So let's shake it up, shake it up ♪

♪ Get the world turning your way ♪

I hurt my ankle, right?

I saw DQ, and I saw a pink bottle.

The best thing

for a hurt ankle is a shot of alcohol.

What the fuck was that?

That boy gonna give me a mimosa.

A mimosa! I can't get…

from a mimosa.

I expected something hard, you know?

Oomph, a little oomph!

[electronic beat playing]

-[crowd cheering] -[whistle blows]

[loud thumping]

[whistle blows]

[man] It's okay to be upset.

You should be.

Whatever happens in life,

some things are not gonna go your way.

But how are you gonna manage it?

Show heart and will.

That's the game of life!

[producer] So, what did you think of Dalton out there?

Honestly, I just went to the Homecoming game for a burger.

I don't care about football.

[rock playing]

Um, yeah,

I tried my best to get his attention.

But I do not chase men.

["Party Go Boom" playing]

♪ I wanna see you Blow it up, blow it up ♪

♪ When you walk in the room… ♪

How are you feeling?

I feel exhausted.

Very exhausted.

About what?

I know there are some good Elite people, for sure.

I'm friends with some of them.

But the others have that rejective attitude, like, whoa.

["Push It To The Edge" playing]

The way she mouths is too obvious.

I didn't like that.

She's so fucking busy making videos.

They try to be superior over me and make me feel below.

Remember the first time we met in your room?

I told you Gallaudet is not what you think it is.

When I graduate, I'm going back to the hearing world for sure.

I wouldn't mind trying music.

I wouldn't mind modeling, too.

I don't mean to burst your bubble like this, but…

you need to get in reality and realize that

you will face many obstacles and challenges.

I'm not gonna let my deafness stop me.

No, it's not about being deaf.

The Gallaudet community, especially the Elites,

will respond to that.

They're nothing, they're ants to me.

They'll come for you. They'll demolish you.

Because I sign "different."

I'm an Elite. You know that, right?

Because the deaf community is so small,

we can't lose our culture. We have to preserve the language.

But that's the problem. It becomes so embedded.

Again, don't forget…

we're a minority.

Just because I'm a deaf person doesn't mean I have to be the same.

Honestly, I just feel exhausted. I feel exhausted!

I've just been hoping for the best, but I feel like I'm living on hope.

But this time, I'm just done. I'm not going to hope anymore.

["Take Me Higher" playing]

-[dog barking] -[woman] Hi!

You good?

After the divorce, my dad became very distant.

Really, it felt like I had no relationship with my father.

How are you?

Yeah, I'm okay. I'm better.

Are you broken up?

Brax?

Yeah.

I'm relieved.

He doesn't have a wonderful background.

I wasn't sure about you being with him.

He only checks in when…

he doesn't like someone I'm dating.

Whatever.

Why did you guys call it off?

Because men are shit!

That includes me?

Yes.

I do wonder if

I had a better relationship with you,

would I date better guys?

Remember I dated that guy who wasn't affectionate, Daequan?

Right, I remember.

I told you about the abortion.

You didn't tell me the full story, no.

Did you know he did it on purpose?

Why would he do that?

Because he was so in love with me.

He tried to trap me. WTF?!

But for you…

I was disappointed you weren't taking precautions.

I didn't plan to tell you at all.

Why is that?

You're not really emotionally available, I don't know?

[quiet electronic theme playing]

Yeah, I…

You're right, I haven't been available.

I've been taking care of myself.

I love you.

-I'm trying not to… -[Alexa laughs]

I see that…

My dad started getting emotional, I was like…

"Whoa! He has emotions?"

Do I think things will change?

I'm not holding my breath. I'm not.

[Daequan] I'm going home because my sister's birthday soon.

I have not been home in a long-ass time.

[woman] Dae Dae!

[cheering]

Hey, brother! Mwah!

If you think about it, my sister is technically my mom.

She was changing my diapers, she was buying me shoes,

she was combing my hair, she was washing me,

she was feeding me. Everything.

[Lakreesha] My baby brother…

I brag about you all the time.

You're about to graduate college.

I'm proud of you.

'Cause I know if momma was here, oh my God.

[emotional piano playing]

When my mom got sick, I never thought she would die.

But I was so young that, like, I didn't understand.

So…

I always thought like, "Damn…

I gotta go home and take care of my mom, what the fuck?"

I feel like something wrong with me, sis, 'cause I still ain't cried about that yet.

-Some of that shit still bottled up. -You the baby. Look, you the baby.

Like, sometimes I still have bad dreams about that.

I feel like if I would have just went home, straight home,

sometimes and helped her,

maybe she'd still be alive, or maybe she would have been alive

for a few more days. Maybe.

Like, I gotta get this money, like, what I got planned…

I'm tryin' to buy a big crib and then y'all just live with me.

-You want all of us to live with you? -Yeah.

-That house gonna be turnt up. -That's what I'm saying, we could live

and be good in a nice-ass house.

And everybody could benefit.

-Like when we was young? -Yeah.

And I get in there and start cooking.

Shit like that, in a big kitchen, all of that.

Oh, I love a big kitchen. I could cook more.

Just like momma, I know. That's what I want.

Yeah, I miss that whole feeling.

How about momma's sweet potato pies?

No, the macaroni and cheese.

When y'all get that call and I be like, "Come on,"

just be like, "Oh, he said 'come on.'

-Let's go." -I'm taking off.

I swear, I'm taking off.

All my kids have got big and grown.

I know, everybody got kids.

You tried to have a baby with me.

Right, but like…

I don't know.

I apologize though, because that's really fucked up.

-Okay. -That was really fucked up.

It was just a dumb decision. It was a dumb moment, a dumb decision.

I was not trying to trap the woman, none of that shit, like…

It was more of just happiness. Having that family…again.

["Perfect Trainwreck" playing]

♪ It's time to make a change ♪

♪ It's time to rearrange my life Uh-oh ♪

♪ Cut the trees to see the wood ♪

♪ Change my perspective Get more protective ♪

♪ Take a little time for myself ♪

♪ Instead of pleasing everyone else ♪

♪ Uh oh oh… ♪

So, yeah…

I dropped out of Gallaudet.

Yeah.

Gallaudet is split into two different groups.

One group has strong deaf backgrounds from deaf schools, whatever,

Elites, you could say.

The other group…

people like me,

who are stuck in the middle, from both hearing and deaf worlds.

I tried…so hard to fit in.

It hurts so much.

It destroyed me entirely.

[emotional pop playing]

♪ Who am I to fall a lie? ♪

At Gallaudet…

I felt the weight on my shoulders and I needed to throw that off.

♪ It's up to me to draw the line… ♪

When deaf people pull me down,

I will use that to my advantage.

Thank you for motivating me more,

for feeding me the energy where boom,

one day I can explode!

♪ Tell me how to live my dreams If they can't be spoken ♪

["Inspector Norse" playing]

I realized that…

I don't want to be in a relationship with a guy who makes me question

his love or loyalty for me.

♪ We are the sun We are the storm ♪

♪ Tonight ♪

I deserve someone…

that I know loves me one hundred percent.

♪ Move along Come a little closer… ♪

What's up? How are you doing?

I'm good.

I was waiting for you. Do you want a drink?

Yeah.

Can she get, um…

Perfect, thank you.

My father is emotionally distant.

And then I noticed similarities between Daequan and my dad.

And Dalton…

doesn't pay enough attention to me.

Tonight's about you.

Brax is the opposite of that.

And feeling loved is what makes me…

feel everything is okay.

Okay…

you said you were done having long hair and would cut it soon.

I can buzz it right off and get rid of it!

-You don't like my long hair?! -I like it, it's just…

It's time to grow up.

Yeah.

I believe everyone is capable of change and I think Brax is capable of changing.

Or he may never change and I'll be a sucker.

["Rapture" playing]

Did you miss me?

Nope.

Just a little bit?

Yeah.

Your hands are cold.

You need warmth!

♪ Fright me down ♪

♪ Whoa you're the knot I can't untie ♪

♪ Whoa… ♪

Awww…thank you!

I just question if I'll ever find someone who will love me as hard as Brax does.

[music swells]

♪ I wonder Whoa ♪

♪ Whoa ♪

♪ Uh oh Uh oh ♪

♪ Whoa uh-oh Uh-oh, uh-oh ♪