Original subtitles

["Killer Cut Offs" playing]

♪ You don't look French But you'll rock berets ♪

♪ All your jeans have rips in them ♪

♪ Walk with a swagger Couldn't master if I tried ♪

What's up?

-How are you? -I'm good.

♪ Can't get over it ♪

♪ Can't get over you… ♪

So…

I have some concerns I want to ask about.

How do you define this relationship?

Because it's very important to me.

I like you a lot.

Braxton is the first person I loved.

Because he's so different.

He doesn't care what people think.

♪ Walk with a swagger Couldn't master if I tried ♪

I was so attracted to that.

Like, cool, I want to be like that.

What is this relationship to you?

♪ Smoke a pipe a day But you're breathing easy ♪

But now I want to chop off his hair while he's sleeping so bad!

This is complicated for me. I love you, but…

I feel like we're different people.

Why? What do you mean?

In terms of goals…

we're just really different.

Brax…

is basically like…

a thick blanket.

I know I'm not that smart, but…

It's not just that. It's more…

In the winter, you need a thick blanket,

but when it's summer, you no longer need that thick blanket.

I feel like you're not very reliable.

You're right, you're very right. I've got a lot to improve on.

Like drinking? I need to stop drinking.

Maybe stop doing drugs.

["Porcupine" playing]

There's a little voice inside my head saying,

"Alexa, it's time!"

And I have to listen to that voice.

I'm just not looking for anything serious.

I don't want a commitment.

I'm just trying to enjoy life. It's my last semester.

Fine, do whatever you want.

Deep down in my heart, my soul, I do feel it's time to let go.

Go! Go!

You're a free bird!

I feel sad, but I'm excited to move on

and see new opportunities come up.

♪ You can call me selfish Don't be sad ♪

♪ You can't listen You can't listen to yourself ♪

♪ You can call me selfish Don't be sad ♪

♪ Till you're asking everybody For their help ♪

["Rewind" playing]

♪ Take it down slow ♪

♪ This is how it goes ♪

♪ Laying out all the lights Guilty and it shows ♪

♪ There's no wrong or right And nobody knows ♪

You mentioned having…

depression and anxiety?

I have moments of extremes.

Like I'm really nervous or really sad or really angry

or really whatever.

I have very high expectations.

And it's impossible for me to attain them.

Social pressure…

all the expectations…

worries about the future…

College is a lot to handle.

So you dwell on the negatives.

People around me don't realize I'm experiencing that…

kind of struggle.

Do you feel alone a lot?

Yes.

With so many people around, you still feel alone?

Yes.

I struggle to make new friends.

I know a lot of people, but I don't feel a real connection with them.

More superficial.

Why can't I be cool? Why can't I be normal?

Help me understand your depression some more.

Like…

the triggers…

When did they start?

My parents got divorced…

when I was five.

Your world was turned upside down.

I've had PTSD since I was a little kid

from what I saw:

My mom and dad's domestic violence relationship.

Recently, last month, I became more stressed

and I reacted to it in a different way.

Something that usually wouldn't make me super upset or angry, now did.

When my dad felt upset or frustrated or angry,

his response was physical violence.

And I see myself responding in the same way.

Whenever I feel angry or frustrated,

I want to get violent.

But I don't want to be violent.

I never really talked to my dad about what happened when I was a little kid.

What I saw and…

what affected me.

I have an idea to try.

What kind of thing?

I'll show you.

I'm afraid if I bring it up to my dad,

we would…

lose the progress we've all made.

Now, imagine all of your…

All your anxious thoughts. Or imagine a specific person.

Here.

Okay, I'm imagining. That'll do.

Now, let's get a ball.

["Whore" playing]

Try?

Brain, fuck you!

[therapist laughing]

Keep going.

I like that.

It literally…

stopped my brain from talking shit about myself.

That's oddly satisfying.

Yes.

I like that.

["Overrated" playing]

♪ You keep talkin' 'bout it Girl, I gotta show you ♪

It's warm?!

You lied to me!

I know Alexa is very outgoing.

She's cool, and she's hot.

Do you usually bring girls here?

No…

but I brought you here, so you should feel flattered.

I'm not really sure if you like me…

I feel like you have that vibe like…

"I'm too cool for you."

That's true.

["Just Me And You" playing]

Apparently his game is a sneaky game. I don't know, that's what I heard.

I think you're hot, in my opinion.

Oh, why thank you!

I'm used to being called cute or beautiful.

Yeah, I feel flattered, but, like…

you can do better.

The way I see it,

you better do something about it!

[Dalton laughs]

I will, when I will.

Come over! It's only 15 steps.

I'm too shy to actually swim over.

Too shy to get moving.

[water splashing]

["Hit Rewind One More Time" playing]

♪ Driving me crazy Oh… ♪

Hi. You look beautiful.

Y'all look completely different.

I need a drink.

Do you have a pen and paper?

Thank you.

[electronic beat playing]

Cheers to our night!

Those two girls were just talking, I could read her lips clearly.

She said, "Oh… she can't hear."

They are looking at me while I'm looking at them.

I'm hot.

Cheyenna…

So what I really want to talk about is, what happened with us?

About that…

like we were talking…

then one day, gone!

I did try to hit you up.

I tried, you know that, right?

Maybe, yeah.

But you never bothered to hit me back.

No, I didn't.

So, how am I supposed to…

I'm hard to get, I know that.

Do you still think that I am a player?

Yes.

You are self-centered.

You know it.

Thanks to my boy, Cameron,

she's playing hard to get, which is fine, but, like…

You're not a saint. That's what I'm trying to say.

I make her know, like…

we're doing the same thing, honestly.

["Can't Stop" playing]

♪ I can't top ♪

♪ This feeling ♪

♪ I can't top ♪

[Alexa laughs]

Do you like to chase guys?

I like to be chased.

So like, uh…

It makes me feel worthy.

Because a lot of boys like to play games.

I like to play games, but sometimes I don't.

I thought you brought me here because…

of your sneaky game.

Like, "Hey, I got you in the pool…

now I want more."

Dalton, you're so far away.

Come…

come.

Yeah, so…

I have something on my mind right now… sorry.

[downtempo piano playing]

Yeah, me too.

For me, it's like he's just…

so chill!

It's like he doesn't care.

I'm not gonna beg him.

As for me, yeah,

of course I'm open to it.

But I'm very shy when it comes to it.

[upbeat pop playing]

You want to go dance?

The thing is, I'm deaf like you and can't hear the music.

He knows all the moves!

You know all the moves!

See, Cheyenna try to call me out at a white club.

[repeating] I'm sorry! I had to say it.

I couldn't dance the way I wanted to, you know?

I need…

more people like me.

You realize we can feel vibration?

Growing up…

I felt like it wasn't fair to me…

that I couldn't listen to music.

[bass line thumps]

Now, I can feel the vibrations.

[bass line thumps]

And everything is so colorful.

And the world isn't a black and white world.

["Own The Night" playing]

♪ Won't stop till the sunrise… ♪

You know what I did? I changed.

I became "The White Rodney," and I showed her my…

ballroom dancing.

♪ You and I losing track of time ♪

♪ You and I gonna own the night ♪

Yeah, we showed what we can do!

In that moment, I felt elated,

just high.

♪ You and I gonna own the night ♪

♪ You and I gonna own the night ♪

♪ You and I gonna own the night ♪

[a cappella girl group]

♪ You're so sexy, you're so cute Got me in my birthday suit ♪

♪ Na na na na na na na na Meow meow ♪

♪ Na na na na na na na na Meow meow ♪

♪ Na na na na na na na na Meow meow ♪

♪ Na na na na na na na na Meow meow ♪

♪ Na na na na na na na na Meow meow ♪

♪ Na na na na na na na na Meow meow ♪

♪ Na na na na na na na na Meow meow ♪

♪ Na na na na na na na na ♪

♪ You keep liking all my pictures And you're always in my feed ♪

♪ I like you too 'cause you're super cute And it's fun every time we meet ♪

♪ Down and around to the ground we go And now we're bumpin' to the beat ♪

♪ Fatty girl, big ol' man Put you in, I'm in your hands ♪

♪ You're so fine, you're so cute Got me in my birthday suit ♪

♪ Fatty girl, big ol' man Put you in, I'm in your hands ♪

♪ You're so sexy, you're so cute Got me in my birthday suit ♪