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["Killer Cut Offs" playing]
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♪ You don't look FrenchBut you'll rock berets ♪
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♪ All your jeans have rips in them ♪
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♪ Walk with a swaggerCouldn't master if I tried ♪
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What's up?
6
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-How are you?
-I'm good.
7
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♪ Can't get over it ♪
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♪ Can't get over you… ♪
9
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So…
10
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I have some concerns
I want to ask about.
11
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How do you define this relationship?
12
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Because it's very important to me.
13
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I like you a lot.
14
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Braxton is the first person I loved.
15
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Because he's so different.
16
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He doesn't care what people think.
17
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♪ Walk with a swaggerCouldn't master if I tried ♪
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I was so attracted to that.
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Like, cool, I want to be like that.
20
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What is this relationship to you?
21
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♪ Smoke a pipe a dayBut you're breathing easy ♪
22
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But now I want to chop off
his hair while he's sleeping so bad!
23
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This is complicated for me.
I love you, but…
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I feel like we're different people.
25
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Why? What do you mean?
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In terms of goals…
27
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we're just really different.
28
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Brax…
29
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is basically like…
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a thick blanket.
31
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I know I'm not that smart, but…
32
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It's not just that. It's more…
33
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In the winter, you need a thick blanket,
34
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but when it's summer,
you no longer need that thick blanket.
35
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I feel like you're not very reliable.
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You're right, you're very right.
I've got a lot to improve on.
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Like drinking? I need to stop drinking.
38
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Maybe stop doing drugs.
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["Porcupine" playing]
40
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There's a little voice
inside my head saying,
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"Alexa, it's time!"
42
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And I have to listen to that voice.
43
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I'm just not looking for anything serious.
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I don't want a commitment.
45
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I'm just trying to enjoy life.
It's my last semester.
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Fine, do whatever you want.
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Deep down in my heart, my soul,
I do feel it's time to let go.
48
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Go! Go!
49
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You're a free bird!
50
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I feel sad, but I'm excited to move on
51
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and see new opportunities come up.
52
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♪ You can call me selfishDon't be sad ♪
53
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♪ You can't listenYou can't listen to yourself ♪
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♪ You can call me selfishDon't be sad ♪
55
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♪ Till you're asking everybodyFor their help ♪
56
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["Rewind" playing]
57
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♪ Take it down slow ♪
58
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♪ This is how it goes ♪
59
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♪ Laying out all the lightsGuilty and it shows ♪
60
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♪ There's no wrong or rightAnd nobody knows ♪
61
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You mentioned having…
62
00:03:41,471 --> 00:03:43,311
depression and anxiety?
63
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I have moments of extremes.
64
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Like I'm really nervous or
really sad or really angry
65
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or really whatever.
66
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I have very high expectations.
67
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And it's impossible for me
to attain them.
68
00:04:05,745 --> 00:04:08,325
Social pressure…
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00:04:08,414 --> 00:04:11,004
all the expectations…
70
00:04:11,084 --> 00:04:13,924
worries about the future…
71
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College is a lot to handle.
72
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So you dwell on the negatives.
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People around me don't realize
I'm experiencing that…
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kind of struggle.
75
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Do you feel alone a lot?
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Yes.
77
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With so many people around,
you still feel alone?
78
00:04:33,856 --> 00:04:35,526
Yes.
79
00:04:36,192 --> 00:04:38,072
I struggle to make new friends.
80
00:04:38,152 --> 00:04:41,532
I know a lot of people, but I don't feel
a real connection with them.
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More superficial.
82
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Why can't I be cool?
Why can't I be normal?
83
00:04:47,328 --> 00:04:49,828
Help me understand
your depression some more.
84
00:04:52,125 --> 00:04:53,205
Like…
85
00:04:53,293 --> 00:04:54,673
the triggers…
86
00:04:54,752 --> 00:04:56,132
When did they start?
87
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My parents got divorced…
88
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when I was five.
89
00:05:02,510 --> 00:05:04,890
Your world was turned upside down.
90
00:05:09,183 --> 00:05:12,063
I've had PTSD since I was a little kid
91
00:05:12,145 --> 00:05:13,975
from what I saw:
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My mom and dad's
domestic violence relationship.
93
00:05:17,567 --> 00:05:21,527
Recently, last month,
I became more stressed
94
00:05:21,612 --> 00:05:24,282
and I reacted to it in a different way.
95
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Something that usually wouldn't make me
super upset or angry, now did.
96
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When my dad felt upset
or frustrated or angry,
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his response was physical violence.
98
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And I see myself responding
in the same way.
99
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Whenever I feel angry or frustrated,
100
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I want to get violent.
101
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But I don't want to be violent.
102
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I never really talked to my dad about
what happened when I was a little kid.
103
00:06:05,448 --> 00:06:07,698
What I saw and…
104
00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:09,834
what affected me.
105
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I have an idea to try.
106
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What kind of thing?
107
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I'll show you.
108
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I'm afraid if I bring it up to my dad,
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we would…
110
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lose the progress we've all made.
111
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Now, imagine all of your…
112
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All your anxious thoughts.
Or imagine a specific person.
113
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Here.
114
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Okay, I'm imagining. That'll do.
115
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Now, let's get a ball.
116
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["Whore" playing]
117
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Try?
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Brain, fuck you!
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[therapist laughing]
120
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Keep going.
121
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I like that.
122
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It literally…
123
00:07:07,510 --> 00:07:10,600
stopped my brain from
talking shit about myself.
124
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That's oddly satisfying.
125
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Yes.
126
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I like that.
127
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["Overrated" playing]
128
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♪ You keep talkin' 'bout itGirl, I gotta show you ♪
129
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It's warm?!
130
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You lied to me!
131
00:08:05,818 --> 00:08:08,398
I know Alexa is very outgoing.
132
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She's cool, and she's hot.
133
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Do you usually bring girls here?
134
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No…
135
00:08:30,384 --> 00:08:33,514
but I brought you here,
so you should feel flattered.
136
00:08:36,933 --> 00:08:40,273
I'm not really sure if you like me…
137
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I feel like you have that vibe like…
138
00:08:44,941 --> 00:08:46,981
"I'm too cool for you."
139
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That's true.
140
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["Just Me And You" playing]
141
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Apparently his game is a sneaky game.
I don't know, that's what I heard.
142
00:09:02,375 --> 00:09:05,085
I think you're hot, in my opinion.
143
00:09:05,836 --> 00:09:08,546
Oh, why thank you!
144
00:09:09,757 --> 00:09:12,547
I'm used to being called cute
or beautiful.
145
00:09:12,635 --> 00:09:15,005
Yeah, I feel flattered, but, like…
146
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you can do better.
147
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The way I see it,
148
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you better do something about it!
149
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[Dalton laughs]
150
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I will, when I will.
151
00:09:36,367 --> 00:09:39,367
Come over! It's only 15 steps.
152
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I'm too shy to actually swim over.
153
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Too shy to get moving.
154
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[water splashing]
155
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["Hit Rewind One More Time" playing]
156
00:10:02,476 --> 00:10:08,976
♪ Driving me crazyOh… ♪
157
00:10:13,738 --> 00:10:15,358
Hi. You look beautiful.
158
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Y'all look completely different.
159
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I need a drink.
160
00:10:23,247 --> 00:10:25,077
Do you have a pen and paper?
161
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Thank you.
162
00:10:38,929 --> 00:10:40,429
[electronic beat playing]
163
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Cheers to our night!
164
00:10:52,943 --> 00:10:56,783
Those two girls were just talking,
I could read her lips clearly.
165
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She said, "Oh… she can't hear."
166
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They are looking at me
while I'm looking at them.
167
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I'm hot.
168
00:11:09,460 --> 00:11:10,340
Cheyenna…
169
00:11:12,296 --> 00:11:15,926
So what I really want to talk about is,
what happened with us?
170
00:11:16,926 --> 00:11:18,546
About that…
171
00:11:18,636 --> 00:11:21,506
like we were talking…
172
00:11:21,597 --> 00:11:24,097
then one day, gone!
173
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I did try to hit you up.
174
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I tried, you know that, right?
175
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Maybe, yeah.
176
00:11:31,315 --> 00:11:32,975
But you never bothered to hit me back.
177
00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:34,437
No, I didn't.
178
00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:36,857
So, how am I supposed to…
179
00:11:37,363 --> 00:11:39,203
I'm hard to get, I know that.
180
00:11:43,577 --> 00:11:46,407
Do you still think that I am a player?
181
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Yes.
182
00:11:50,126 --> 00:11:52,336
You are self-centered.
183
00:11:54,422 --> 00:11:56,512
You know it.
184
00:12:00,010 --> 00:12:01,680
Thanks to my boy, Cameron,
185
00:12:01,762 --> 00:12:04,312
she's playing hard to get,
which is fine, but, like…
186
00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:06,390
You're not a saint.
That's what I'm trying to say.
187
00:12:06,475 --> 00:12:08,265
I make her know, like…
188
00:12:08,644 --> 00:12:10,814
we're doing the same thing, honestly.
189
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["Can't Stop" playing]
190
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♪ I can't top ♪
191
00:12:19,905 --> 00:12:22,235
♪ This feeling ♪
192
00:12:24,243 --> 00:12:25,453
♪ I can't top ♪
193
00:12:26,746 --> 00:12:27,656
[Alexa laughs]
194
00:12:36,005 --> 00:12:38,545
Do you like to chase guys?
195
00:12:39,300 --> 00:12:41,800
I like to be chased.
196
00:12:41,886 --> 00:12:44,256
So like, uh…
197
00:12:44,346 --> 00:12:46,676
It makes me feel worthy.
198
00:12:48,392 --> 00:12:51,602
Because a lot of boys like to play games.
199
00:12:52,062 --> 00:12:54,982
I like to play games,
but sometimes I don't.
200
00:12:55,065 --> 00:12:57,435
I thought you brought me here because…
201
00:12:57,526 --> 00:12:59,776
of your sneaky game.
202
00:13:01,822 --> 00:13:04,332
Like, "Hey, I got you in the pool…
203
00:13:04,408 --> 00:13:05,948
now I want more."
204
00:13:14,627 --> 00:13:17,247
Dalton, you're so far away.
205
00:13:17,505 --> 00:13:18,795
Come…
206
00:13:18,881 --> 00:13:20,091
come.
207
00:13:24,136 --> 00:13:26,756
Yeah, so…
208
00:13:28,224 --> 00:13:32,944
I have something on my mind
right now… sorry.
209
00:13:34,188 --> 00:13:36,358
[downtempo piano playing]
210
00:13:36,440 --> 00:13:38,110
Yeah, me too.
211
00:13:39,193 --> 00:13:41,653
For me, it's like he's just…
212
00:13:41,737 --> 00:13:42,857
so chill!
213
00:13:42,947 --> 00:13:45,447
It's like he doesn't care.
214
00:13:45,825 --> 00:13:48,115
I'm not gonna beg him.
215
00:13:52,748 --> 00:13:54,038
As for me, yeah,
216
00:13:54,124 --> 00:13:56,044
of course I'm open to it.
217
00:13:56,126 --> 00:13:58,586
But I'm very shy when it comes to it.
218
00:14:09,181 --> 00:14:11,641
[upbeat pop playing]
219
00:14:16,856 --> 00:14:19,146
You want to go dance?
220
00:14:19,608 --> 00:14:22,818
The thing is, I'm deaf like you
and can't hear the music.
221
00:14:22,903 --> 00:14:24,743
He knows all the moves!
222
00:14:24,989 --> 00:14:27,319
You know all the moves!
223
00:14:27,408 --> 00:14:29,868
See, Cheyenna try to call me out
at a white club.
224
00:14:29,952 --> 00:14:32,662
[repeating] I'm sorry! I had to say it.
225
00:14:33,122 --> 00:14:36,542
I couldn't dance the way
I wanted to, you know?
226
00:14:36,792 --> 00:14:38,132
I need…
227
00:14:39,920 --> 00:14:41,130
more people like me.
228
00:14:46,343 --> 00:14:48,893
You realize we can feel vibration?
229
00:14:51,265 --> 00:14:52,675
Growing up…
230
00:14:52,766 --> 00:14:55,766
I felt like it wasn't fair to me…
231
00:14:55,853 --> 00:14:57,653
that I couldn't listen to music.
232
00:14:57,730 --> 00:14:59,820
[bass line thumps]
233
00:14:59,899 --> 00:15:01,859
Now, I can feel the vibrations.
234
00:15:01,942 --> 00:15:04,862
[bass line thumps]
235
00:15:04,945 --> 00:15:07,525
And everything is so colorful.
236
00:15:07,615 --> 00:15:11,075
And the world isn't a black
and white world.
237
00:15:11,160 --> 00:15:12,910
["Own The Night" playing]
238
00:15:12,995 --> 00:15:15,155
♪ Won't stop till the sunrise… ♪
239
00:15:16,206 --> 00:15:17,916
You know what I did? I changed.
240
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:21,170
I became "The White Rodney,"
and I showed her my…
241
00:15:22,338 --> 00:15:24,338
ballroom dancing.
242
00:15:24,423 --> 00:15:27,013
♪ You and I losing track of time ♪
243
00:15:27,092 --> 00:15:29,682
♪ You and I gonna own the night ♪
244
00:15:31,472 --> 00:15:33,852
Yeah, we showed what we can do!
245
00:15:36,602 --> 00:15:39,022
In that moment, I felt elated,
246
00:15:39,104 --> 00:15:40,064
just high.
247
00:15:40,147 --> 00:15:42,187
♪ You and I gonna own the night ♪
248
00:15:45,486 --> 00:15:47,486
♪ You and I gonna own the night ♪
249
00:15:50,032 --> 00:15:52,532
♪ You and I gonna own the night ♪
250
00:15:52,868 --> 00:15:55,328
[a cappella girl group]
251
00:15:55,412 --> 00:15:58,422
♪ You're so sexy, you're so cuteGot me in my birthday suit ♪
252
00:15:58,499 --> 00:16:01,039
♪ Na na na na na na na naMeow meow ♪
253
00:16:01,126 --> 00:16:03,706
♪ Na na na na na na na naMeow meow ♪
254
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:06,506
♪ Na na na na na na na naMeow meow ♪
255
00:16:06,590 --> 00:16:09,090
♪ Na na na na na na na naMeow meow ♪
256
00:16:09,176 --> 00:16:11,716
♪ Na na na na na na na naMeow meow ♪
257
00:16:11,804 --> 00:16:14,434
♪ Na na na na na na na naMeow meow ♪
258
00:16:14,515 --> 00:16:17,095
♪ Na na na na na na na naMeow meow ♪
259
00:16:17,184 --> 00:16:19,194
♪ Na na na na na na na na ♪
260
00:16:19,436 --> 00:16:24,016
♪ You keep liking all my picturesAnd you're always in my feed ♪
261
00:16:24,692 --> 00:16:29,412
♪ I like you too 'cause you're super cuteAnd it's fun every time we meet ♪
262
00:16:30,072 --> 00:16:34,742
♪ Down and around to the ground we goAnd now we're bumpin' to the beat ♪
263
00:16:35,452 --> 00:16:38,292
♪ Fatty girl, big ol' manPut you in, I'm in your hands ♪
264
00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:40,752
♪ You're so fine, you're so cuteGot me in my birthday suit ♪
265
00:16:40,833 --> 00:16:43,383
♪ Fatty girl, big ol' manPut you in, I'm in your hands ♪
266
00:16:43,460 --> 00:16:46,130
♪ You're so sexy, you're so cuteGot me in my birthday suit ♪
18314
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