Original subtitles

Things couldn't be going better.

We found out that Edgar was struck by an East Peck clock...

That would mean he was hit at 8:00 p.m. North Peck time,

which would shrink our timeline down to 15 minutes.

...which means my client

didn't have the opportunity to kill him.

We've got our timeline.

Now, defending the most popular person in town

would normally put a lot of pressure on a legal team.

But my team is not normal.

And in fact, I've never seen them more focused.

Mickey Moose! Mickey Moose!

Mickey Moo-o-o-se!

kidding me?

Mickey Moo-o-o-se!

Dwayne, you're supposed to be at the Jessups' house,

finding the potential murder weapon.

But it's Moose Day!

If Mickey Moose sees his breath,

it tells us how many Saturdays we have in a month.

Mickey appears a bit restless.

I don't want to be Mr. Obvious,

but why don't you check a calendar?

Uh, I don't want to be Mr. Obvious either.

Sturgill Obvious got electrocuted

blow-drying his hair in the shower.

- Okay, folks. He's inhaled. - He inhaled! Antlers on!

- Oh, I'm gonna pass. - Put the antlers on, Josh.

No, I don't think so.

- Oh, do it for us. - Oh, no, man. It'll be fun.

- I'm happy just to watch. Please. - Come on, just once.

Josh, I'm not losing out on my Saturdays because of you!

Put on the antlers, Josh!

The moment we've been waiting for.

See your breath! See your breath!

See... your... breath!

We interrupt our 'round- the-clock Moose Day coverage.

Lavinia Peck-Foster has been arrested again.

This time for stealing a sandwich.

- No! No! - Who cares?!

Now back to our regular coverage.

Whoa! What a shocker!

Until next year, you can't handle the moose.

Thanks a lot, Josh.

Now we have no idea how many Saturdays

are left this month.

synced and corrected by susinz *www.addic7ed.com*

This one's for your release.

This one is for your possessions.

And this one is for my mom.

"With love, L.P.F."

Thank you, Officer Braxton.

Why were you stealing a sandwich?

I was out, and I got hungry.

Edgar paid for everything. I don't even carry a wallet.

You carry a disguise!

Everywhere I go, people want something from me.

Even here, they took my pictures.

- Here you go. - Thank you.

Your gold cigarette holder...

- Danke. - ...scarf...

- Grazie. - ...and your alien baby.

- Oh. - Oh! What is that?

It's Fluffy.

No, it's not.

Fluffy is my childhood cat.

- Childhood cat? - Mm.

- Shouldn't he be dead? - No, he shouldn't.

Should you?

In order to get a conviction,

the prosecution needs three things.

Opportunity.

Our timeline shows Lavinia would've only had 15 minutes

to kill Edgar and dispose of the body, which is impossible.

Motive.

She loved the guy, and she had more money than him.

Murder weapon.

Which I have my best man getting right now.

We learned from clock expert/ murderer Jesse Ray Beaumont

that the clock Lavinia used to bash Edgar's head in

belongs to the Jessups.

Now, the Jessups are real bad people,

and normally I would feel uncomfortable approaching them

or asking them not to barbecue in a movie theater.

But right now, I am on police duty,

so I am unafraid.

East Peck PD!

We got a warrant to search the premises!

Oh! Let's get the out of here!

Get off our property, you weedpecker!

Aah! We got a cameraman down!

Camera... Oh

Get! That's right... Get!

I'm not around!

Hey, you.

What's wrong with your face?

That was a smile.

But you're right.

Let's be... professional.

Uh, I think I left my sock in your office.

Okay, you got me.

Things are heating up with Carol Anne Keane and me again.

I'm not sure if the baby she's carrying is mine.

After last night...

the next one will be.

Will be what?

♪ Will be coming 'round the mountain when she comes ♪

Okay.

Okay, you got me.

Nina and I have this flirting thing.

She's cool and cute and from New York,

but Carol Anne Keane and I might be having a...

- Having a what? - Ow!

♪ Having a heart attack ♪

♪ If you keep sneaking up on me, whoo ♪

You're talking to the camera in front of the ladies' room.

Yes, I am.

Okay.

♪ I'll be having a heart attack when she comes ♪

♪ I'll be having a heart attack when she comes ♪

- ♪ I'll be... ♪ - [WOMAN GASPS]

Sorry, sorry, sorry!

I am never gonna be able to hear this guy.

Maybe I can help?

I have something called hyperacusis,

or random dog-level hearing.

Oh. Okay.

It happens whenever I have an ear infection, and I have...

Oh. I'm sorry.

I can't hear myself think

with the squirrels fighting on the roof.

"Mr. Segal, you called for this evidentiary hearing.

Do you have something to submit?"

I do, Your Honor.

Based on the autopsy photo, we have reason to believe

that the murder weapon used to strike Edgar Foster was a clock.

A clock that should be here...

any minute.

In the meantime, I would like to submit expert testimony

that the marks on Edgar's head belong to an East Peck clock

which means that Edgar was struck at 7:00 p.m.,

East Peck time,

8:00 p.m., North Peck time,

making it impossible for my client

to have committed the crime

according to the state's timeline.

Wait, who is this clock expert?

I can't mention Jesse Ray Beaumont's name

in front of my client because he murdered her brother,

and last time, his name elicited a... strong reaction.

Hey, no!

"I can't read this."

Jesse Ray Beaumont.

- "I can't hear you." - I can't hear you.

Read that back to me, please.

"I can't hear you. I can't hear you.

I can't hear you."

Jesse Ray Beaumont.

Oh!

Oh Oh!

You have a plate, but no wallet?

Your Honor, I strongly urge the court

to reject the testimony of Jesse Ray Beaumont.

He is insane, he's a felon, and I threw away your sock!

Objection!

That was a Gold Toe sock!

Josh.

Dwayne, I told you not to be late to the evidentiary hearing!

I'm sorry. I couldn't obtain the "evidench."

The Jessups don't have it.

And they took my patrol car as collateral until they get it.

"Next time you call for an evidentiary hearing,

I suggest you actually have evidence."

Also, a cat is gurgling in a purse.

Jesse Ray!

How dare you pull that crap in the courtroom!

Me? I kept it professional!

You're the one who threw away my sock.

I'm talking about Jesse Ray Beaumont.

You knew he screwed me.

- That guy? - Oh, don't be crass.

This can only be one of six men.

Jesse Ray Beaumont was the worst case of my career!

According to your testimony,

you heard Mr. Ray Beaumont brag about an evil deed.

Is that correct?

I do not recall.

You are

You tell me right now who got to you, you

- You tell me right now! - Order in the court!

Anarchy!

Tell me right now!

I want to know right now, God damn it!

- Whoo! - Order in the...

I had no idea that's how Kamiltow lost his voice.

After I was removed from the case,

Atticus Ditto Jr. took over.

When he won, he got D.A.

I spent the next two years

prosecuting public-exposure cases.

I have seen roughly half-a-mile worth of wiener.

So did my ex-fiancée.

Too soon. For me.

Lavinia may be my last shot at redemption.

I'm getting a search warrant for her house,

and I am finding that murder clock!

You've already seen the unused nursery

for the children we never had.

But this room was to be the playroom

for those very same children.

And do you see this table...

with picture frames for children?

They're empty.

Like my womb.

What are you going to do?

Can we change this tour from your biological clock

to the murder clock, please?

We have seen every childless room in this house.

The clock is not here.

- This is a waste of time. - Well, that's not true.

We've got lots of swag from the gift-wrap room.

This murder has paid for itself.

This door is locked. What's in there?

I hear ticking.

It's a bomb room! Stand back!

Dwayne!

How is your first instinct to shoot the bomb room?!

Training.

Whoa.

Wow.

This is Edgar's clock workshop.

Careful of those chemicals.

Fluffy got in here 30 years ago,

lost all his hair, and became immortal.

We have got to find that murder clock.

It has got to be in here somewhere.

- Ooh. Whoa. - Hey, hey. Hey.

Mm. Maybe you shouldn't be in here with all these chemicals.

Nonsense. My mom worked around chemicals her entire pregnancy.

- Thank you, Dwayne. - Nonsense.

My mom worked around chemicals her entire pregnancy.

Oh

Are you okay?

I'm fine, I'm fine.

I just need to get to my OB-VYN appointment.

You mean OB-GYN.

My regular doctor won't see me

since I'm prosecuting Lavinia,

so I have to go to a veterinary gynecologist.

How do you become an OB-VYN?

East Peck Community College.

Your one stop for degrees in Criminal Justice,

Air Conditioner, Repair,

Businessman, Paralegal, VCR Repair,

Veterinary Gynecology, Books, Pet Psychology...

I just want to get there before another patient

marks the exam table. Reed!

As an officer of the law, you need to give me

that clock if you find it.

So much pressure.

Sometimes I wish I'd majored in Air Conditioner.

Mm.

Oh!

Edgar kept a log of the clocks he worked on.

We need something like this in the office.

I miss a lot of what comes in.

A lot.

I mean a lot.

Look. The Jessup clock

was signed in by someone named Amanda,

but never signed out.

Who's Amanda?

Oh, she was Edgar's apprentice.

Edgar fired her about a month ago.

She became disgruntled and swore revenge.

Haven't seen her since.

Why? Do you think that's important?

Amanda had a motive,

access to the murder weapon,

and I am going to find out if she had opportunity.

I told you... Casework is where my team really shines.

Nonsense. My mom worked around chemicals her entire pregnancy.

I knew the case would eventually take a turn in our favor.

Well, I didn't know it, but, man, I hoped for it really hard.

So, now we are off to visit our new suspect at her new job.

Do you recognize this clock?

That's the Jessup clock.

They brought it in to be gold-plated.

That would explain the gold flakes on Edgar's head.

If you could just bring my honey-barbecue wings

and tell us you murdered Edgar,

that'd really wrap things up for us.

I did not murder Edgar.

I looked up to him.

Were you upset when he fired you?

No. I was ready to move on.

It was the only time we ever saw eye to eye.

Now excuse me. I have to go cash out.

She is holding back.

Let a woman handle this.

- Anne, uh... maybe we should... - Okay.

...just talk about it.

Listen, I know what it's like

to get a little somethin' somethin' at the office.

I got a guy at work who wants me real bad.

Edgar was just a mentor, that's it.

Be straight with me.

Did you ever

Or maybe a little "ooh"?

Ooooh!

Did you two ever waka waka waka...

Anne! Anne! Anne!

- Waka. - Fine! Yes!

We had sex.

Once.

I couldn't help myself.

He was such a clocksman.

And that's why you murdered him!

Can I get a little ranch over here?

I did not murder Edgar.

I wasn't even at the party that night.

I was working.

I already went over this with the prosecutor.

Really? Huh.

Lady driver coming through!

Lady driver! Lady...

Oh. Excuse us.

You interviewed a witness without letting me know?

How dare you barge in on a woman and her lady doctor!

Okay. Mr. Pickles and then Carol Anne.

You can't keep hiding information from me.

"A," it's illegal. "B," it's not fair.

Don't talk to me about fair.

My gynecologist table has four stirrups on it.

Sorry, but the law's the law.

And your client keeps breaking it.

She stole a sandwich. Doesn't make her a murderer.

Oh, you're so naive.

I'm not naive. You're the one that's naive.

Why are you still here? Like any potential dad,

I want to go into the vet with the mother.

See, this is what I'm talking about.

You don't see things the way they really are.

You and I have a strictly professional relationship.

What about last night?

We did... waka-waka.

Last night was just an itch that needed scratching.

I'm not itchy anymore.

I mean, I am, but that's just because I'm allergic

to Mr. Pickles.

I'm trying to do the right thing.

Then leave. I don't need you.

Fine. You're on your own.

Good. You're just embarrassing yourself by coming here.

Carol Anne? Let's get you weighed.

Just wanted to see how it went with the new suspect.

I know you helped us with Jesse Ray,

but I have to be careful about what I share with you.

It feels a little... dis-bar-y.

We're just two people having a conversation.

- Ah. - For example,

I can mention some dirt I just heard about the Pecks.

- We know about the affair. - What affair?

What affair? No affair.

Who said anything about an affair?

Next week on "M-Towne," the affair.

What dirt did you hear?

Just that the Pecks have no money.

What are you talking about? They're the richest family in town.

Not according to like six people who worked for them.

But, uh, obviously you've been through their finances.

- Obviously, I have. - Uh-huh.

And the defense finds out his client is poor.

Poor? How could I be poor?

Look at all this food.

I'm gonna throw most of it out.

You know what?

I bet you heard I was a heavy pour.

That's what you heard.

Okay, I'm gon...

I'd like to ask you a question.

And I need you to be honest.

Lawyer, I'm an open book.

Literally, there's a book over there on that table.

About me. And it's open.

We need to prove that you had nothing to gain

from Edgar's death.

Did he leave you anything?

A trust? A will?

An insurance policy?

Rich people don't talk about money.

It's crass. This conversation is over.

This lunch is over!

I think my phone was on the table.

I need to eliminate money as a potential motive.

So I'm going to the town's only insurance broker

to find out if Edgar had a policy.

Possibly buy a T-shirt.

Welcome to East Peck Casualty and Casual Tees Insurance.

How can I help you? Life insurance,

home insurance, a T-shirt with an ironic slogan?

None of those, thank you.

I need some information about Edgar Foster.

Hey, you're the lawyer.

I'm... I'm a big fan.

I-I notice you just bought a house.

May I interest you in some cannonball insurance?

No need. My Realtor told me I'm out of range.

I actually just wanted to know if, uh,

Edgar happened to have a life-insurance policy?

Huh. Suit yourself,

but cannonballs fly at 5:00 and 5:00.

He had an extra, extra small one.

Oh. Okay, well, that eliminates motive.

Oop. Sorry. That was his, uh, T-shirt size.

His insurance policy was XXXL.

$50 million.

That's why she killed him.

Finally got her.

Hold on.

Did Lavinia ever come in and claim the policy?

Huh. She wasn't the beneficiary.

It was someone named Ronnie Del Mundo.

Who's Ronnie Del Mundo?

I have no idea, but if the money doesn't go to Lavinia,

then someone else had motive.

- This is huge! - So is this.

Does this come in anything other than a youth small?

I feel fantastic.

I had a positive checkup and a nice shampoo.

Was I mean to Josh? Maybe.

But he needs to understand

this case is really important to me,

and that he and I will always have

a strictly professional relationship.

With occasional intercourse.

However, I'm not a monster,

so later, I will take him a new sock and a bottle of wine.

Things are going pretty well.

I got Dwayne looking into our new suspect, Ronnie Del Mundo,

and I get to take a very rare break.

That was relaxing.

Hey.

Nina. What are you doing here?

I had a pizza overnighted from New York five days ago.

Just arrived, and I figured you were

the only person in this town who would appreciate it.

Oh, my God. I love you.

Obviously, I don't love you.

Like "love you" love you. We just met.

That would be totally inappropriate.

Would you like to come inside?

Yeah.

Okay.

Well, your place is adorable.

- Oh, thank you. - Oh.

Are you renting it from an old lady?

Uh... yep.

Oh.

My God, my Realtor lied!

Oh!

What the is that?!

It's a cannonball.

- What? - Are you okay?

Um, yeah, I think so.

- Ah. Here. - Thank you.

Oh, man, you have

some shards of glass in your hair.

I've never been shot at by a cannonball before.

Well, you know, believe it or not, you get used to it.

Guess it's the price you pay

for living in a small town

that randomly fires cannonballs every 12 hours.

Dwayne said it was urgent.

Hey, there!

Welcome to the EPPD... my job away from job.

- Don't be jealous. - Hey, Reed,

you left your gun in the microwave!

Good one!

The fellas here, they like to give me a hard time.

You said you had information on...

This had better be about the moose. Sorry, Anne.

Just about an arrest record for Ronnie Del Mundo.

Ronnie Del Mundo has an arrest record?

He could be our murderer.

Yep. He got picked up recently in South Peck.

My brother-cousin has some contacts over there.

I told him I need that file as soon as possible.

But he's a dick, so he's faxing it.

Oh! Here it comes.

It's coming.

It's still coming.

Oh. Oh, no!

Anne, is it Ronnie Del Mundo?

It's an East Peck Gazette F-blast!

Mickey Moose didn't see his breath!

- Oh, God! - Aw!

- Ohh! - All right!

We're officially on a second Friday schedule!

Oh, man!

Here it comes.

Well, it looks like we got our murderer.

Oh

Reed!

Oh, dangit!

synced and corrected by susinz *www.addic7ed.com*