All language subtitles for the.magicians.us.s04e02.720p.bluray.x264-mayhem

Previously on
The Magicians...

Alice is fine.

Depressed, surly.

Still asking to see you again.

She's fixated on the thing
she says she saw in the castle.

She's worried
about her friends.

I can't think of anyone
better protected than they.

They must stay where they are,
as they are.

They'll be fine.

Your spellwork was masterful.

There's something
you need to know

and as soon as I start
telling you about this,

bad shit is gonna start
flying at our heads.

So, how do we figure out
who we really are?

Hi. I'm Marina.

I'm here to help.

So, you're like some powerful,
benevolent white witch?

Uh-huh.

Let's take a peek underneath
and see what you really look like.

Fix it.

I don't know what
you want me to fix!

Whatever the matter
is in Fillory!

Hello?

Hello?

Old.

Things get old
so fast, don't they?

Sorry, but where are we?

I told you, Greece.

Right, right.

This is the temple
of the god we are summoning.

Enyalius.

God of war.

Thought that was Ares.

Say that
when you see him.

It makes him so mad.

So, okay.
Go in the woods.

Get a pig.

- Excuse me?
- A wild pig.

The younger the better.

Sorry, I don't mean to be difficult,
but couldn't you just conjure one?

Hmm, no.

It has to be caught
with human hands

and stained
with human effort.

You know, that...
That stuff that comes out of your skin.

Sweat?

Hurry.

What the fuck
did you do?

I didn't do anything.

That spell's
a cunt with fangs.

I thought your amulet
was supposed to protect us.

It did. You're alive,
and welcome, asshole.

Great. Well, that didn't work
and we're back to square one.

- Yeah?
- Hello, whoever you are.

Do not tamper
with my enchantment.

Holy shit,
it's James Earl Jones!

Shut up.

Yes, you've triggered
a read-me file voicemail.

And, no, you may not take me
off speakerphone.

You will not circumvent
or defeat this spell.

Whoever you are,
walk away. Now.

Or your death is as certain
as those I've enchanted.

So, spells are basically
credit cards

with automated
fraud warning calls?

That's not super inspired.

Well, neither
is Henry Fogg,

nor his favorite students,
right?

Sit in the kitchen
until I tell you it's safe.

You stay.

She scares me.

Yeah, well,
she's not the one with the Glock.

I've got a theory
about you, stud.

Stand close.

Ooh.

Oh, Henry.
Such a good try.

What are you doing?

Ow.

I'm making you useful.

Wait.

Where's Janet?

Hello?

Anyone?

Mother Nature,
can you hear me?

Wow, forests
don't even talk.

Whole psychotic break
just lacks imagination.

Again.

- Jesus.
- Dude.

The chips.

How am I doing this?

Yes.

This pond better be vodka.

Your Majesty?

Jesus Christ.

Forgive the suddenness
of my introduction.

I know you're not quite
yourself, King Margo.

What are you?

Where am I?

And why does everybody
in this nightmare keep calling me king?

Is that even a thing?

I'll endeavor
to explain.

Hello.

You're being kind of quiet.

Look, you're nice and all.

Sort of. But I... I could use
some intel on this place,

but how do I know
you're not a snitch?

Well, because like it or not,
I'm Santa.

Which used to mean I was once
considered fairly honest.

Reasonably reliable,
but I... I don't know.

Maybe, uh,

slightly admired.

Then all of a sudden
it was like, "Hey,

"you break into houses once a year.
What's up with that?"

And, "Kids sit on your lap.

"How is that not creepy?"

Congratulations, Earth.

You ruined
the name of Santa.

So, you don't want
to hear from me?

Good.

'Cause I'm sure you don't need
this thing I could get you,

called magic.

How?

I am the Lord
of All Fillorian Fresh Water.

Which is a bit pretentious,

so, please,
call me Lord Fresh.

Assuming this is actually happening,
you pulled me down here.

Why?

Your birthright box.

You and my birth box
ain't happening,

so back up,
Shape of Water.

No, no.
Your birthright box.

- There.
- Oh.

Right.

No, Majesty!

If you touch it, it will harm you.

Even my protective wards
couldn't save you.

You know
about that spell shit?

I'm really
somebody else,

and if I try to figure out who
shit clobbers me, burns me?

Correct.

Though, as I said,
you're safe down here.

Your birthright box,

which it has been
my honor to guard,

dictated your absence
from the kingdom,

your loss of self,

and your return
this day and hour.

But I must caution.

It also predicted

that you would learn
what it is

to live and rule alone.

Yeah?

Well, alone's my jam,
grenouille.

And no matter what,
I rule.

Your enchantment
is most powerful.

I'm not sure that
my wards will hold.

To come back
and claim your destiny,

you must find the god
who summoned you in the dream.

Please accept
my apologies.

I'm afraid I can't keep you
as safe as I had hoped.

Walk toward the mountains.

My destiny is to die of
pneumonia, isn't it?

You can tell me.

Hardly, Majesty.

Please return when
the spell is lifted.

Here's your lunch.

Ugh!

Well, if he's anything
like my Henry,

he keeps most of his secrets

in here.

Todd.

Oh, my God.

Hansel?

- Hey.
- We gotta hustle.

Yeah, uh...

Anything I... I can do?

Yeah. Take your shirt off
and make me a sandwich.

Sorry, but I'm starved.

If it helps, I'm vegan, so this sucks for me, too.

Todd? Jesus,
are you drunk?

Marina.

Hello, Henry.

What is this?
What did you do?

It's the same blue shit
you gave Hansel.

Only I knew you wouldn't
drink it at my request.

So, here's the deal.

Give yourself the antidote.

There is no antidote.

Bullshit.

Whoa, hoo, hoo, hoo!

So, it's true!

Everything she's been
telling us is true!

Us?

Who else
is involved in this?

Pretty much all of your apple-shining,
ass-kissing teacher's pets.

Oh, Christ.

Whatever she's saying she's going to do
to help you, she isn't.

And how are you talking
about this without...

Being attacked
by the world?

It's magic, remember?

What timeline
are you from?

The one where
you owe me child support.

I'm kidding.
So, the spell takes, what,

a day to kick in?

It's almost dawn.

You say
there's no antidote.

You better get
to a lab and get to it.

Because I'm not
turning you into a DJ.

No.

You won't like
the new you.

Unless you have a secret dream
to live in a moving box.

You just hit the rethink button,
okay?

Let's go.

Bye.

Jesus.

Todd.

How long
have you been awake?

- We need to get you some help.
- No.

And what you just saw
dies with you.

Do you understand?

This cannot continue.

An infinity of pardons,
Acting High King Fen.

There is an urgent matter.

An urgent poacher?

Who claims
to be the High King.

So, an urgent,
insane poacher.

- Was my first thought.
- Until?

The name was uttered.

So,

you claim
to be High King

- Margo?
- No!

Ow!

- There you have it.
- So, every time you say...

Weird, huh?

You look
nothing like her.

Look.

I'm not saying
I'm who we are not talking about.

But I had this dream
where this goat god, Amber?

- Ember.
- Ember.

Whatevs.

Said I had to get here
quick and dirty.

The reports are true.

Ember has indeed
returned to Fillory.

Miraculously risen
from the dead.

Look, if you know
where this Ember is...

We don't,
is the problem.

We don't want to find him.
We have to.

Something's happened
since his return.

Oh, I'm nodding
so you hurry

and you get to something
I actually understand.

Oh.

Our air has always
been graced

with what you
on Earth call opium.

But now it's saturated.

For some it's tolerable.

Some get quite giddy,

a few succumb to sleep
at the most inconvenient times,

and then there
are those who...

Dance. In the nude.

It sounds
lighthearted,

but it's actually resulted
in a number of deaths,

mainly in falling asleep
in the wrong place

at the wrong time.

Trampled in the middle of the road
being the most common.

However, a dance troupe
did die of exposure on a glacier,

though, by all accounts,
quite gracefully.

Magic is now rationed.

And none of it is powerful
enough to reverse this.

And since it coincides
with Ember's return...

His glorious resurrection
and divine rule!

We hope.

We've come to believe
that this is his doing.

And perhaps
if he could be told

of the damage
it's causing,

he could be convinced
to reverse this.

Guys.

I need to stress

how much I don't give a shit.

Oh.

But he's dodging you

and he wants me.

So, let's find the fucker.

Sassy.

- Hi.
- Hi! Kim, sorry, I'm late.

No, this won't take long.

I think I'm flunking out.

Oh, first-year nerves,
totally normal.

No, no, no,
I am literally failing everything.

I mean, if I could
just pass one...

And somebody told you
I have a cheating spell.

- Yes.
- Okay, I will hook you up but right now,

I'm trying not to freak.

- What's wrong?
- I can't tell you.

- Okay.
- I promised.

- Right.
- Dean Fogg is leaving. Shit!

Why did I just say that?

Because it's too much.

Why do I have to be
the only one who knows?

Wait, he's leaving? Why?

Oh, believe me,
it is not his choice.

See, there's this Hedge Witch,
and she...

Dean Fogg, hi!
Sorry, I'm late.

I will give you
every cheating spell I have

if you please don't repeat this,
okay?

Great. Thanks.
It's gonna be fine.

Oh, my God,
this is horrible.

So, even after you're gone, nothing
about Marina can go in the memoir?

Write or breathe a single word
and there will be blood on your hands.

But the outstanding business
I'm attending to today

should be recorded
in minute detail.

Walter.

Walter.

You're the best drinking
companion I've ever had.

Thanks. I mean,
we only drank together twice.

I'm a high-functioning
alcoholic, Walter.

We prefer to do
our serious drinking alone.

So that when we weep,
we can wallow in self-loathing

without embarrassment.

- Did you get that, Todd?
- Fantastic.

Excellent.

Walter, in my office bar

is an unopened bottle
of 1977 Hollcroft single malt

that I was going to drink
if I ever committed suicide.

Enjoy, my dear friend.

It's not your fault
I'm always broke, Ashley.

I'm a degenerate gambler
who could use magic

to alter the outcome
of any game.

But then I couldn't relive
the secret shame I've held

since I was two years old.

What I crave most in the world
is the degradation of losing.

Thank you for every single
moment of that.

You're $56 short.

You're a cutthroat bookie.

Gold.

Magic has been a brutal
series of disappointments.

And after having lived
40 timelines,

39 of which range
from the comically horrendous

to the apocalyptically absurd,

to find it was
all for nothing...

Well, leaving this life
actually feels liberating.

- Hold this, Todd. Thank you.
- Okay.

Tell Jennifer thank you
and goodbye.

I had an affair
with his wife.

He behaved abominably.

Do you find all this
as cathartic as I do, Todd?

I think you really hurt him.

Well, back to my childhood.

I was raised
by my grandmother,

the kindest, wisest person
I've ever known.

Of course,
I could never tell her that

because all forms of intimacy
horrify me.

"All forms of intimacy
terrify the hell out of me."

Yes?

Kim. What can I
do for you?

Look, I'm pretty sure
I shouldn't tell you this.

Well, you probably shouldn't
have walked in and said that.

I don't think
that I belong here.

As I said,
it would take some time.

And, I promise, you do.

Right, and you're literally the only one
that thinks that, and you're leaving.

Todd.

Look, it's not his fault.
He's just upset.

I am, too.
Anybody that knew would be.

Please.

I probably
owe you an explanation.

My life is mostly
made up of regrets.

I'm not looking for
contradiction or pity.

It's just a fact
I'm suddenly forced to face.

But of all my many regrets

the greatest is something
I did very recently

to some of the most maddeningly
millennial students I ever had.

What...

Were they gonna hit us?

Advantage of being
the spell caster.

I'll never be able to correct
what I did to them.

But, Kim,
one day you might.

Me?

You have no idea
what you're capable of.

I do.

Okay, then if you want me
to help these students,

can you tell me who they are?

Their lives were
in grave danger.

I cast a spell that erased their identities
and gave them new ones,

and now that same spell
has been cast on me.

Jesus.

I mean, isn't there
anything you can do?

Well, if I reveal that
the spell can be reversed,

then someone would reverse
the spell on my students,

ensuring their deaths.

I will not allow
that to happen.

I have to do this.

I must accept this.

Hmm...

Ah, stubborn dude.

You got Plan B?

B plans are for losers.

Okay.

Uh... Well, whatever happens,
thank you for trying.

I don't really know

why you're putting yourself out
so much for us,

but it's pretty cool.

Well, it's pretty common
knowledge

that I'm a very,
very good person

who lives to help others.

Mmm.

Oh.

It's such a piece of shit.

Hey. I like the artwork.

Yep. Sure.

You have to admit,
the characters? Us?

We're pretty complex.

Oh, yeah, real complex.

Yeah, Isaac's big problem
is his dick is too big.

Hey. It can be a problem.

Seriously.

It narrows the field
by a lot more than you think.

I've been on way too many first dates
that end in urgent care, so...

- Gross.
- Look.

My life is pretty cool,

so, how do I know
this other me is gonna...

Nail as many groupies?

Whoa, hey, whoa, no.

That is not what Hansel
is about, okay?

You think there's a chance
the real you didn't bang your sister?

Hey, no, isn't that...

She was my stepsister, okay?

Stepsister.

And we didn't know till...
Till later.

Mmm.

Too many stepdads.

All right, well,
what about you?

- What's your kink?
- Me?

No, see, I'm perfect.

Yeah, I catch drug dealers,
murderers,

arsonists,
blackmailers, pimps.

I even stopped a girl from giving
herself a coat-hanger abortion

and got her to Planned Parenthood.
You see, I...

I'm a hero.

So, why would
you give that up?

You sound awesome.

I sound fake.

Which I am.

Oh, like your thunder meat.

All right, easy. It's...

It's... It's a meat.

I don't know
if it's thunder.

We just never know
where his celestial,

newly risen godliness
is going to pop up next.

From the brothel
in the Lower Meerskin,

Ember was then sighted on the schooner
of the thin white duke off Basher Island,

where there was a celebration
for three days and nights.

Okay. Well, so far, every sighting
he either gets the party started

or he dives right into one
that's already jumping off.

Ember has always
enjoyed his pleasures,

but this pace reeks
of self-destruction.

Please.

One July 4th,

I bet I could snort
my body weight in coke.

This dude's an amateur.

Next.

Landfall at Shimmering Cliff Palace,
then an orgy

at Sacred Sky Nunnery.

Okay.
That's almost impressive.

So, look, he's headed east.

If he keeps going,
what's the next hotspot?

The Hare on the Ass.

Seriously?

Whimsy.

I fucking hate it.

So, you found
a whole family of them, huh?

Mmm.

What happened
to the mother pig?

Kill it.

What?

Enyalius won't come
without a sacrifice, silly.

Here.

Slit its belly open, please.

Entrails on the altar.

No, I'm not, I'm not...

Look, I'm a person with a job
and a girlfriend and a life,

and I'm not your...
Your pal. Or your playmate.

And I'm not scared
of you anymore.

So, why don't you
just fucking kill me?

I would never do that.

Ah!

Hello, Etta.

Oh, I suppose
this is why you summoned me.

Thank you.

Oh, and the answer is no.

Your new suit
is not finished yet.

Oh, pity.

You are usually
not this impatient.

Henry, would you like to see
the work in progress?

Oh, yes.

Okay.

Ah.

Beautiful.

Of course.

- Damn it.
- What in the world?

Magic ration.

My office had some
unexpected visitors today

who took a huge portion
of today's magic.

Ah. No worries.

Smell.

I'm sorry.

That's my grandmother's
huckleberry pie.

Wait, what?

What is it, Henry?

So, why a comic book?

Graphic novel, Etta.

Had a lot of characters
with detailed backstories.

And I could look at them.

So, the glamour
was much easier to cast.

Doesn't matter now.

I'm about to live
a version of it.

Though, I'm assured,
one not quite as nice.

Well, you seem
awfully sanguine.

Fate's a fucker
that always wins.

Okay, I've known you for 22...

Well, 23 years now.

And I've loved you dearly
every moment.

Fully aware that you can barely
stand yourself.

And that made me sad,

but it also made you my best customer.

How so?

Isn't it obvious?

Come on, the bespoke suits,
the hand-sewn shirts...

It's armor.

It's an armor to keep
the world away.

A disguise so that nobody

can see what a truly
loving heart you have.

You said if revealed,
the spell can be reversed.

Kim. Don't.

I'm one of them,
aren't I?

You have to undo this
on all of us.

And then what?

And then we fight.

I know I can't stop you.

But please,
be more careful now

than you've ever
been in your life.

Well, lives.

Finally getting
to be your teacher

has been an honor.

You're now the saddest loser
I ever buried.

Look.

Marina.

Hi, Dad.

How's it going?

Got it.

Do you feel it?

Stronger further up.

My arm wouldn't
even fit in there.

Go, little buddy.
Come on.

Come on, little buddy.

Hey. Hey, come on now.
Little narration.

Fuck off.

Come on, little buddy.

Yes?

I realize that.

But these dossiers
are private.

Holy shit.

Sorry, little buddy.

What happened?

What?

Did... Did anyone ever tell you
you're kind of withholding, you know?

Oh, come on. You're not trying
to kill yourself again, are you?

No.

Hey, is all of that chimney
stuff about you true?

Never met one
I couldn't crack.

- Leg next?
- No, no, no, no, no.

Okay, I'm ready.
Whatever you want, okay?

Ah.

Oh.

Time to die.
Yes, it is.

Give me a little goodbye kiss.

Yes.

Explains a lot of weird shit,

but I promised I'd keep
everything about him private.

Okay.

Yeah, and I'm trying
to save him.

So, please.

How was that?
Was it good?

- Yeah.
- Can I have one?

Oh, yes. Of course.

Thank you.

Magic's supposed
to stay on till 11:00.

Spells take magic, right?

- Which is rationed.
- Which sucks.

And a spell like this would take even more
power than a normal one, right?

I mean, think about it.
It's six, seven, eight people?

Plus whole lives?

No. If you had any interruption
in the flow...

Wait. Magic's off.

It's him.

It's the spell. He told me that
it would try and kill us.

Right, but
without magic, how...

Shit.

Maybe he actually
finished it.

Finished what?

This thing
he worked on for years.

A perpetual battery.

Come on.

Pray a little
harder, please.

Is that
suckling I smell?

Enyalius?

Well, fuck, yeah, it is.

You know what's funny?

He sacrificed the pig.

He prayed.

And he's never heard of you.

How dare you?

I want it back.

Give it to me.

Well, I have no idea
what "it" is,

but I grant you permission to search
my ball sack with your tongue.

Fine.

I'll just take it.

Okay, so,

remember, Fogg said be really,
really careful.

Because...

Oh, my God. Kim?

Kim.

No, no.

No, no, no.

Yeah, I need a medic.

Yeah, I think she's...

Sorry, prank.

Kim. Are you okay?

Fine.

No, see.

You kind of

died.

Well, maybe being un-killable
is my discipline.

Yeah, that's not a thing.

Hey.

How much juice
do you think this thing has?

Well, it's perpetual.

So,

it can be overloaded.

I have no idea.

Oh, shit!

How is this a good idea?

Oh, God.

It's not in there!

You're not Enyalius,
are you?

You're his servant.

A Corybant.
Aren't you?

All right, look, he's...
He's not who you want, so just...

You know, let him go.

All right?

Why did your master
send you to trick me?

He knows.

It's not even midday.

Real ragers rave in the day.

Horn guy. Is that him?

Who is that?

An imposter.

No wonder he won't see
anyone who knows him.

Hey. Ember.

I'm here.

Yeah, you are.

Congrats.

Where are your hooves?

Todd!

Quentin. You're back.

Oh.

You wanted to play.

Sorry. He's too dead.

Cool trick. Do it again.

Okay, what the what now?

What the fuck are you
doing here, Bacchus?

All right.

Have we banged?

I followed you on Instagram.

Everybody did
till they kicked you off.

Oh, I know, right? Dicks.

Well,

that explains
all the opium in the air.

Nice touch, I like it.

It's pretty sweet, right?

Mmm-hmm. All right, all right.
What are you doing here?

Why do you want everyone
thinking you're Ember?

Hey, so, you really want
to go back to Earth, right?

No, I want you
to answer my fucking question.

Thanks for popping in.

Where is our High King?

Who are you?

A god

is all you need to know.

I'm glad
you're back, Quentin.

I was getting a little tired
of the Brian game.

Yeah. Me, too.

So, maybe I missed something
when we were playing,

but you had to
torture him to death.

Why, again?

Gods are so tricky.

Right.

But what about the one
that you were after today?

Oh, we'll get him.

And I'll get back
what he took from me.

And then the others.

They all took.

Took what, exactly?

See, that's what
I don't really know.

They took
this part of me

that knew things.

It's not fair.

No, yeah, totally.

They owe you.

Got it.

You really understand me,
Quentin.

It's good to have
a friend like you.

You know,
speaking of friends,

when you get back
what the gods took from you,

maybe...

Could I maybe
have Eliot back?

The one who
tried to kill me?

Hey, hey, no. No.
That was a mistake.

You were there.
Do you

like him more than me?

No, I... I didn't say that.

You miss him.

You... You miss
all your friends.

The...

The ones in my castle
who tried to kill me.

Good.

Huh.

Well, upsides and downsides.

Yeah, no,
I remember everything.

Kind of like a dream.

I was gonna say
acid trip myself.

Oh, my God.

Mis hermanos.

Where were you? We...
We looked everywhere.

- Stay back.
- Why?

Because I'm not here to play.