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1
00:00:00,924 --> 00:00:05,924
Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
2
00:00:06,006 --> 00:00:11,553
Okay. The right combination
is to say X is one of those
3
00:00:11,635 --> 00:00:13,096
and two of these.
4
00:00:14,430 --> 00:00:16,974
Well, let's take the equation number two.
5
00:00:17,641 --> 00:00:23,314
If I make a picture that satisfies
all the X, Y, Z points
6
00:00:23,397 --> 00:00:25,108
that solve this equation,
7
00:00:25,649 --> 00:00:28,152
well, first of all, the origin
is not one of them.
8
00:00:28,236 --> 00:00:32,157
X, Y, Z, it being zero, zero, zero,
would not solve it.
9
00:00:33,033 --> 00:00:36,661
So, what are some of the points
that do solve it?
10
00:00:37,746 --> 00:00:41,458
Now, let's see maybe if X is one and...
11
00:00:43,917 --> 00:00:45,753
Katelyn Ogden was a lot of things,
12
00:00:45,837 --> 00:00:48,506
but she wasn't particularly explosive...
13
00:00:51,634 --> 00:00:53,302
in any sense of the word.
14
00:00:54,345 --> 00:00:56,263
She was a sun dress of a person...
15
00:00:57,057 --> 00:01:00,018
cute, airy, inoffensive.
16
00:01:02,020 --> 00:01:03,855
She was quickly becoming the Dalton twins'
17
00:01:03,938 --> 00:01:06,566
number one marijuana customer
at Covington High.
18
00:01:06,649 --> 00:01:09,027
But that's hardly a reason
to pop like a zit.
19
00:01:09,109 --> 00:01:10,903
She's all over me!
20
00:01:10,986 --> 00:01:12,863
Spraying all over us.
21
00:01:13,906 --> 00:01:18,411
I wasn't close with Katelyn.
She was just, you know, a classmate.
22
00:01:18,495 --> 00:01:21,081
Someone I sat behind
or passed in the halls every day
23
00:01:21,164 --> 00:01:23,582
from kindergarten to senior year.
24
00:01:24,793 --> 00:01:26,419
We ran in different circles.
25
00:01:26,503 --> 00:01:29,588
But lots of people liked her.
Guys especially.
26
00:01:29,673 --> 00:01:31,257
I was going to ask her to prom.
27
00:01:32,299 --> 00:01:34,635
She was so hot.
28
00:01:35,094 --> 00:01:37,971
I even narrowed down motel room options
to two choices.
29
00:01:39,849 --> 00:01:42,185
She was so open-minded.
30
00:01:42,268 --> 00:01:44,646
Jed Hayes was particularly crushed.
31
00:01:46,313 --> 00:01:48,148
- Mara!
- Oh, my God, Tess!
32
00:01:48,233 --> 00:01:50,902
- Oh, my God. What happened?
- Katelyn exploded.
33
00:01:50,984 --> 00:01:52,278
What? Like a bomb?
34
00:01:52,361 --> 00:01:55,197
No. Like... a balloon?
35
00:01:55,281 --> 00:01:56,365
What?
36
00:01:57,575 --> 00:01:59,201
Oh, my God, your shoes.
37
00:02:01,829 --> 00:02:05,750
Everyone quickly realized
Katelyn Ogden was not a suicide bomber,
38
00:02:05,834 --> 00:02:10,170
seeing as the only thing that blew up
was Katelyn Ogden.
39
00:02:10,254 --> 00:02:13,257
Her desk remained unscathed
by the Ogdenblast.
40
00:02:14,508 --> 00:02:18,971
The only damage her clothes took
was cosmetic.
41
00:02:20,181 --> 00:02:22,308
This isn't right. She was just a kid.
42
00:02:22,391 --> 00:02:24,728
It wasn't right. She was just a kid.
43
00:02:24,811 --> 00:02:26,521
This is fucking disgusting.
44
00:02:27,021 --> 00:02:29,733
And it was very fucking disgusting.
45
00:02:30,734 --> 00:02:32,736
After the unprecedented event,
46
00:02:32,818 --> 00:02:36,072
all of our third-period class
got taken to the police station.
47
00:02:36,156 --> 00:02:38,450
Which was very exciting.
48
00:02:38,532 --> 00:02:40,617
We got asked a lot
of important questions like...
49
00:02:40,701 --> 00:02:42,746
Did Katelyn ever say anything suspicious?
50
00:02:43,246 --> 00:02:46,249
About wanting to blow up? All the time.
51
00:02:50,544 --> 00:02:51,628
I was kidding.
52
00:02:57,134 --> 00:03:00,262
Then they took all our clothes
and let us shower.
53
00:03:00,930 --> 00:03:02,098
Will I get these back?
54
00:03:03,140 --> 00:03:04,725
Do you want these back?
55
00:03:07,937 --> 00:03:09,814
I only washed my hair.
56
00:03:10,939 --> 00:03:14,485
Then they gave us a bunch of
ugly-as-shit sweat suits and made us wait.
57
00:03:25,538 --> 00:03:27,832
It was like a Cronenberg movie.
58
00:03:38,926 --> 00:03:40,719
What do you think happened?
59
00:03:40,804 --> 00:03:43,306
- Aliens?
- It wasn't aliens, bro.
60
00:03:43,389 --> 00:03:45,474
I'm just saying.
She was there, then she wasn't.
61
00:03:45,557 --> 00:03:46,643
It's not fair.
62
00:03:47,060 --> 00:03:48,770
She was so nice.
63
00:03:48,853 --> 00:03:50,522
I was gonna ask her to prom.
64
00:03:50,604 --> 00:03:52,439
She was very open-minded.
65
00:03:52,524 --> 00:03:54,651
When the hell are they gonna
let us out of here?
66
00:03:54,734 --> 00:03:56,861
When they know
it's not gonna happen again.
67
00:03:56,944 --> 00:03:58,570
When what's gonna happen again?
68
00:04:10,500 --> 00:04:11,710
It happened again.
69
00:04:12,419 --> 00:04:14,504
It happened again a lot.
70
00:04:42,531 --> 00:04:44,450
I'm not going to school tomorrow.
71
00:04:45,535 --> 00:04:47,078
No shit, sweetheart.
72
00:05:10,726 --> 00:05:13,145
- Are you hungry?
- No, not really.
73
00:05:16,232 --> 00:05:17,609
Do you wanna talk?
74
00:05:18,151 --> 00:05:19,735
I think I just wanna go to bed.
75
00:05:21,779 --> 00:05:22,946
Okay, kiddo.
76
00:05:25,783 --> 00:05:28,411
- You know, we thought it was a shooter.
- Dad...
77
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:31,497
We didn't have any information.
They didn't tell us anything.
78
00:05:34,291 --> 00:05:37,461
I'm just trying to say
that we're so glad you're okay.
79
00:05:38,420 --> 00:05:43,468
And that your classmates
are just regular assholes and not evil.
80
00:05:45,637 --> 00:05:48,139
That is a silver lining.
81
00:05:54,353 --> 00:05:55,479
Good night.
82
00:07:20,398 --> 00:07:23,443
- Is this song...
- Yeah, it is definitely sexual.
83
00:07:25,403 --> 00:07:26,653
Right on.
84
00:08:05,151 --> 00:08:07,987
I always wondered what happens to those
when someone dies.
85
00:08:08,697 --> 00:08:09,988
Fuck me.
86
00:08:10,906 --> 00:08:12,324
I need drugs.
87
00:08:13,992 --> 00:08:15,120
Shrooms?
88
00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:17,371
- Shrooms?
- No.
89
00:08:17,872 --> 00:08:21,084
Yeah. It's like weed, but a fungi.
90
00:08:21,625 --> 00:08:22,876
I've never had shrooms.
91
00:08:22,961 --> 00:08:25,295
I honestly cannot think
of a better time to start.
92
00:08:25,379 --> 00:08:26,880
It's a terrible time to start.
93
00:08:29,050 --> 00:08:30,718
I would love to start.
94
00:08:36,725 --> 00:08:38,143
You're going to make yourself sick.
95
00:08:38,225 --> 00:08:40,186
You brew 'em in liquid
so that you don't get sick.
96
00:08:40,269 --> 00:08:42,062
That's what Native Americans do.
97
00:08:42,147 --> 00:08:43,773
- In pumpkin spice lattes?
- Yeah.
98
00:08:44,190 --> 00:08:45,942
Pumpkins. Thanksgiving.
99
00:08:48,903 --> 00:08:49,903
Here.
100
00:08:50,404 --> 00:08:52,115
Oh, my God. I fucking love it.
101
00:08:53,700 --> 00:08:56,953
Tess McNulty and I have been best friends
since elementary school.
102
00:08:57,495 --> 00:08:59,246
Will you be my best friend forever?
103
00:08:59,330 --> 00:09:00,790
Obviously.
104
00:09:04,793 --> 00:09:07,713
When Tess' shitbrain dad
walked out on her and her mom
105
00:09:07,797 --> 00:09:09,673
we spent a few days at the beach,
106
00:09:09,758 --> 00:09:12,259
and we saw these baller old chicks
in kimonos,
107
00:09:12,344 --> 00:09:14,971
smoking a hookah
with their toes in the sand.
108
00:09:15,471 --> 00:09:16,972
Let's do this.
109
00:09:17,057 --> 00:09:18,850
It remains our life plan.
110
00:09:18,932 --> 00:09:21,101
- To Katelyn.
- To Katelyn.
111
00:09:26,482 --> 00:09:28,442
No. No.
112
00:09:28,525 --> 00:09:30,361
Stop. Stop!
113
00:09:31,321 --> 00:09:33,281
This is... Put...
114
00:09:34,990 --> 00:09:36,201
Are you done?
115
00:09:39,287 --> 00:09:41,163
I didn't know Katelyn that well
beyond social media.
116
00:09:41,246 --> 00:09:42,498
Yeah, I know. Me neither.
117
00:09:42,999 --> 00:09:45,250
- Did she get into college yet?
- I don't know.
118
00:09:45,335 --> 00:09:47,420
I know she wanted
to be a journalist though.
119
00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:49,839
We have too many
excellent journalists as it is.
120
00:09:51,131 --> 00:09:56,596
Did Katelyn at least get laid
before everything?
121
00:09:57,179 --> 00:09:59,431
Oh, yeah. She was a total slut.
122
00:09:59,515 --> 00:10:00,933
You know what? Good for her!
123
00:10:01,017 --> 00:10:03,311
I agree! Get it while the getting is good.
124
00:10:03,394 --> 00:10:05,270
The only downside is high school boys.
125
00:10:05,355 --> 00:10:09,024
I know. I cannot wait to be old.
I can't wait to be a cougar.
126
00:10:09,109 --> 00:10:12,528
I'm gonna be like, "Come hither,
young man, and pleasure me eagerly."
127
00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:14,989
Hey, mind if I join you guys?
128
00:10:16,448 --> 00:10:19,326
Tess, don't look now,
but there's a boy staring at us.
129
00:10:24,249 --> 00:10:25,625
I think he's staring at you.
130
00:10:26,292 --> 00:10:27,585
Right you are.
131
00:10:28,753 --> 00:10:30,672
- Hey, Dylan.
- Hey, Mara.
132
00:10:31,255 --> 00:10:33,298
- Hey, Tess.
- Hi, Dylan.
133
00:10:33,674 --> 00:10:34,717
Thanks.
134
00:10:35,342 --> 00:10:36,635
- How you guys doing?
- All right.
135
00:10:37,011 --> 00:10:39,179
Definitely the best memorial service
I've ever been to.
136
00:10:39,264 --> 00:10:40,472
Best funeral, too.
137
00:10:40,557 --> 00:10:42,017
Second best for me.
138
00:10:42,642 --> 00:10:43,810
My dad's was better.
139
00:10:45,352 --> 00:10:46,687
Well, holy shit, Dylan.
140
00:10:46,812 --> 00:10:50,066
It's okay.
The Ogdens can just try harder next time.
141
00:10:50,567 --> 00:10:51,775
Well, holy shit, Dylan.
142
00:10:51,860 --> 00:10:55,404
- Am I bombing this banter thing?
- Like the end of Dr. Strangelove.
143
00:10:55,488 --> 00:10:57,032
Don't you think that movie
is kind of ruined now?
144
00:10:57,115 --> 00:10:58,533
Yeah, I kind of do.
145
00:10:59,366 --> 00:11:00,993
What's going on?
146
00:11:01,076 --> 00:11:02,327
Yeah, actually, what is going on?
147
00:11:02,412 --> 00:11:06,331
I thought talking to you at the funeral
might be icky.
148
00:11:07,125 --> 00:11:08,876
- Icky?
- It's an adjective.
149
00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:10,295
Yeah, I know it's an adj...
150
00:11:13,298 --> 00:11:14,966
Holy shit!
151
00:11:15,049 --> 00:11:17,593
- You're the guy! You have a crush on me!
- Hello.
152
00:11:17,677 --> 00:11:20,388
- What's going on?
- This is the guy. This is dick pic Dylan.
153
00:11:21,347 --> 00:11:22,639
You sent her a dick pic?
154
00:11:22,724 --> 00:11:24,684
No, that would be gross!
155
00:11:24,768 --> 00:11:26,353
He sent me pictures of Richards.
156
00:11:26,436 --> 00:11:29,105
- That's worse!
- How is that worse?
157
00:11:29,563 --> 00:11:31,440
- Why did you text me that?
- The Richards?
158
00:11:31,524 --> 00:11:33,442
No. The declarative statement.
159
00:11:36,488 --> 00:11:38,698
Katelyn exploded in the middle of precalc,
160
00:11:38,782 --> 00:11:42,285
and it got me thinking about life,
in an ironic way,
161
00:11:42,369 --> 00:11:45,497
and what would happen
if I popped, you know.
162
00:11:45,580 --> 00:11:47,791
And then you said, it might happen again,
163
00:11:47,874 --> 00:11:52,253
and I was like, I gotta get shit done,
in case she's right.
164
00:11:59,927 --> 00:12:02,471
Do you wanna go
to the ladies room with me?
165
00:12:04,474 --> 00:12:06,017
Come on. It'll be fun.
166
00:12:06,100 --> 00:12:07,851
She's gonna go to the bathroom
and throw up
167
00:12:07,936 --> 00:12:09,687
because she just drank
a shitload of mushrooms
168
00:12:09,812 --> 00:12:11,855
and she wants you to hold her hair back.
169
00:12:13,857 --> 00:12:14,858
In that case...
170
00:12:18,363 --> 00:12:21,991
I'm not usually like this.
I can usually really hold my drugs.
171
00:12:23,826 --> 00:12:25,412
Also, I usually never do drugs.
172
00:12:25,495 --> 00:12:27,621
We live in strange and unusual times.
173
00:12:27,706 --> 00:12:29,081
That is so true.
174
00:12:34,921 --> 00:12:36,840
There are a lot of you.
175
00:12:39,717 --> 00:12:40,718
How many?
176
00:12:40,802 --> 00:12:43,471
I'll throw up if I count,
but more than one.
177
00:12:44,096 --> 00:12:45,305
That's awesome.
178
00:12:46,349 --> 00:12:48,268
- You should make out.
- All right.
179
00:12:50,186 --> 00:12:51,646
How do I do that?
180
00:12:51,687 --> 00:12:53,398
With your tongues.
181
00:12:54,231 --> 00:12:55,649
Oh, shit.
182
00:13:06,035 --> 00:13:10,247
I saw Katelyn's dad scratch her stick
figure sticker off the back of his car.
183
00:13:10,331 --> 00:13:14,168
I always wondered what happens to those
when someone dies.
184
00:13:14,251 --> 00:13:16,712
What happens is, I get shroomed.
185
00:13:17,547 --> 00:13:19,966
Hey, did you see Katelyn...
186
00:13:20,049 --> 00:13:21,884
Go boom? No.
187
00:13:22,844 --> 00:13:23,845
Did you?
188
00:13:24,888 --> 00:13:26,139
I only heard it.
189
00:13:27,682 --> 00:13:32,312
It's weird being right there
and missing it.
190
00:13:33,312 --> 00:13:37,524
Like, I'm sad I missed it
and that makes me feel terrible.
191
00:13:37,609 --> 00:13:42,072
Yeah. No, it must be so invigorating.
192
00:13:43,365 --> 00:13:44,698
Invigorating.
193
00:13:48,410 --> 00:13:49,536
Okay.
194
00:13:53,917 --> 00:13:55,043
You okay?
195
00:14:01,216 --> 00:14:02,716
Thanks for saying you like me.
196
00:14:03,509 --> 00:14:04,510
Sure.
197
00:14:05,386 --> 00:14:08,389
Hey, would you want to come with me
to the homecoming game?
198
00:14:11,893 --> 00:14:12,894
What?
199
00:14:14,687 --> 00:14:16,855
I'm trying to think of a reason to say no.
200
00:14:19,317 --> 00:14:22,028
- I could give you some.
- Shoot.
201
00:14:22,528 --> 00:14:25,782
Well, maybe just homecoming sucks?
202
00:14:25,865 --> 00:14:27,616
Yeah, but it's fun to make fun of.
203
00:14:28,158 --> 00:14:30,662
- Plus, Halloween.
- Yeah, okay.
204
00:14:31,495 --> 00:14:36,583
Then maybe I'm just a guy
who is interested in grief-induced sex.
205
00:14:37,626 --> 00:14:39,837
Way sluttier girls than me, though.
206
00:14:40,547 --> 00:14:42,841
Probably wouldn't stick around
while I hurled either.
207
00:14:42,923 --> 00:14:43,924
True.
208
00:14:45,217 --> 00:14:47,553
Well, maybe you just don't really know me.
209
00:14:49,014 --> 00:14:50,472
But I do know you.
210
00:14:50,557 --> 00:14:52,225
- Oh, yeah?
- Yeah!
211
00:14:53,058 --> 00:14:54,727
You're in a bunch of my classes.
212
00:14:55,269 --> 00:14:57,688
You're a movie nerd. You're pretty cute.
213
00:14:58,898 --> 00:15:01,567
Your dad died
when a bunch of manure fell on him.
214
00:15:03,485 --> 00:15:05,864
Oh, my God, I'm so sorry.
I just realized I said that out loud.
215
00:15:05,947 --> 00:15:09,616
- Now you have to come to the game with me.
- I really do.
216
00:15:09,701 --> 00:15:12,037
- I'm so sorry.
- No, it's okay. It's okay.
217
00:15:12,120 --> 00:15:13,830
I blame the shrooms.
218
00:15:13,913 --> 00:15:16,499
Okay. Yes. Thank you.
219
00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:19,377
My dad was a farmer.
220
00:15:19,461 --> 00:15:21,004
But he died of a heart attack.
221
00:15:21,712 --> 00:15:25,049
The rumor of him
being crushed to death by shit is false.
222
00:15:25,133 --> 00:15:28,345
And impossible, if you've seen
any Back to the Future movie.
223
00:15:32,057 --> 00:15:33,307
Kids are cruel.
224
00:15:34,183 --> 00:15:36,685
- I'm really sorry.
- It's okay.
225
00:15:38,355 --> 00:15:39,563
We're all cruel.
226
00:15:46,321 --> 00:15:47,572
Today was weird.
227
00:15:50,075 --> 00:15:51,283
Tonight was all right.
228
00:15:52,826 --> 00:15:55,955
Yeah. Tonight was all right.
229
00:16:03,087 --> 00:16:06,091
This isn't gonna become
a regular thing, right?
230
00:16:07,174 --> 00:16:08,550
The intoxication?
231
00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:13,055
No. No. I just needed...
232
00:16:15,975 --> 00:16:17,601
I don't know what I needed.
233
00:16:19,729 --> 00:16:21,272
Have you cried yet?
234
00:16:24,274 --> 00:16:25,485
Have you?
235
00:16:26,735 --> 00:16:28,237
I cry all the time.
236
00:16:33,368 --> 00:16:35,787
It's just not the same without the blood.
237
00:16:35,870 --> 00:16:37,538
I just look like a stupid prom queen.
238
00:16:37,621 --> 00:16:40,250
I should have just dressed up
as a sexy witch too.
239
00:16:40,332 --> 00:16:42,084
I'm just a normal witch.
240
00:16:42,168 --> 00:16:43,503
Not even cleavagey.
241
00:16:43,919 --> 00:16:46,088
Girl, your sexiness is unavoidable.
242
00:16:47,798 --> 00:16:50,300
Shit. They've built her a shrine.
243
00:16:54,179 --> 00:16:55,597
Hey, there's dick pic.
244
00:16:55,682 --> 00:16:57,558
Hello, Quaker Oats.
245
00:16:57,642 --> 00:16:58,810
Are you supposed to be Carrie?
246
00:16:58,893 --> 00:17:01,021
Yes! Oh, my God, thank you!
247
00:17:01,104 --> 00:17:03,189
Yeah. No, it's great. I mean,
it would have been really cool...
248
00:17:03,273 --> 00:17:05,525
- Don't say it.
- I know. Katelyn fucked it up.
249
00:17:07,277 --> 00:17:09,319
I mean, she didn't intentionally...
250
00:17:09,403 --> 00:17:10,779
You're making it worse.
251
00:17:14,034 --> 00:17:15,201
Your hat.
252
00:17:16,618 --> 00:17:18,996
Hey, will you stop? I don't know you.
253
00:17:24,544 --> 00:17:28,214
So, what gives, Hipster Oats?
254
00:17:28,589 --> 00:17:30,674
Our football team are the Quakers.
255
00:17:30,759 --> 00:17:34,346
No, not your costume.
The crush you say you have on me.
256
00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:38,892
I want, like, a timeline.
257
00:17:43,063 --> 00:17:44,230
So...
258
00:17:45,940 --> 00:17:47,025
First day of school.
259
00:17:47,107 --> 00:17:48,942
New town after my dad died.
260
00:17:49,027 --> 00:17:52,822
First time I saw you is right after Spiros
introduced me in front of the class.
261
00:17:52,905 --> 00:17:54,907
You must be Dylan. Welcome.
262
00:17:55,366 --> 00:17:58,036
Class, I'd like for you to meet
Mr. Dylan Hovemeyer.
263
00:17:58,118 --> 00:18:02,499
He's new here, so please,
don't be yourselves. Be nice.
264
00:18:07,878 --> 00:18:09,630
It was a good first impression.
265
00:18:10,882 --> 00:18:13,468
A few weeks later,
I saw you at the Moonlight,
266
00:18:13,550 --> 00:18:16,387
and when Jed tried wrapping his arm
around you...
267
00:18:21,017 --> 00:18:23,687
And then, on the day after the election...
268
00:18:25,270 --> 00:18:27,190
Mara, why are you wearing that?
269
00:18:27,272 --> 00:18:29,233
Because I'm motherfucking grieving.
270
00:18:29,317 --> 00:18:31,236
You got detention for the profanity.
271
00:18:31,318 --> 00:18:33,070
Motherfucking worth it.
272
00:18:34,571 --> 00:18:37,366
It's clichéd,
but you wrote a poem last spring
273
00:18:37,450 --> 00:18:41,830
that made me feel like you understood me,
even though we barely talked.
274
00:18:41,913 --> 00:18:44,207
I friended you on Facebook afterwards.
275
00:18:44,289 --> 00:18:46,084
I looked at your pictures sometimes.
276
00:18:46,166 --> 00:18:48,877
I even gave you my number,
but I think you forgot
277
00:18:48,961 --> 00:18:51,172
or never saved it in your phone.
278
00:18:51,256 --> 00:18:54,759
I hoped we'd run into each other
during the summer but never did.
279
00:18:55,384 --> 00:19:00,140
And then it was senior year and I thought,
why try? We're going to college.
280
00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:06,646
And that made me sad, because
you seemed so cool and original.
281
00:19:08,565 --> 00:19:09,816
But then...
282
00:19:12,152 --> 00:19:14,362
When Katelyn died,
I didn't see you anywhere.
283
00:19:16,196 --> 00:19:18,866
You had two backpacks.
One of them was hers.
284
00:19:22,537 --> 00:19:23,829
Are you okay?
285
00:19:25,039 --> 00:19:26,582
I don't know what to do with this.
286
00:19:26,665 --> 00:19:28,292
I can take care of it for you.
287
00:19:37,551 --> 00:19:38,802
When what happens again?
288
00:19:45,309 --> 00:19:47,436
And when you said it might happen again,
289
00:19:47,519 --> 00:19:51,148
I thought, whoa,
maybe I've been wasting my entire life
290
00:19:51,231 --> 00:19:54,109
preparing for a year
that may never come for me.
291
00:19:54,193 --> 00:19:55,611
So fuck it.
292
00:19:55,694 --> 00:19:57,364
I'm going to tell you how I feel.
293
00:19:57,446 --> 00:20:00,157
I'm going to spend my savings on a car.
294
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,951
I'm not going to be scared anymore.
I'm not...
295
00:20:05,038 --> 00:20:07,332
Wait, are you even listening to me?
296
00:20:08,540 --> 00:20:10,125
Yeah. Sorry. No.
297
00:20:10,542 --> 00:20:12,044
Seriously, that was wonderful.
298
00:20:12,127 --> 00:20:14,673
I don't want you to think
I was not paying attention...
299
00:20:14,756 --> 00:20:18,134
'Cause it kind of looks like
you're just taking pictures of the game.
300
00:20:18,218 --> 00:20:21,179
No! No. Not of the game.
Never of the game.
301
00:20:22,346 --> 00:20:26,558
I'm waiting
for the "We Love Cocks" moment.
302
00:20:27,268 --> 00:20:30,521
I would have never guessed
that was what was about to be said.
303
00:20:31,314 --> 00:20:32,774
Okay. Look.
304
00:20:32,856 --> 00:20:38,278
Every game, Harper Wie, Perry Love
and Steve Cox, for just one brief moment,
305
00:20:38,363 --> 00:20:41,157
line up for the "We Love Cocks" moment.
306
00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:43,951
- That's so immature.
- It really is.
307
00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:53,877
I have a moment for you...
308
00:20:54,878 --> 00:20:56,588
where I knew I liked you.
309
00:20:58,842 --> 00:21:00,051
You like me?
310
00:21:00,969 --> 00:21:02,095
Maybe.
311
00:21:06,182 --> 00:21:07,976
It was, like, forever ago.
312
00:21:08,058 --> 00:21:11,730
And I was just chilling and then
you looked me in the eye and you said,
313
00:21:11,813 --> 00:21:13,230
"Mara...
314
00:21:15,107 --> 00:21:16,900
we love cocks."
315
00:21:19,570 --> 00:21:20,738
Mara...
316
00:21:21,573 --> 00:21:24,409
we love cocks.
317
00:21:30,373 --> 00:21:31,708
Did something happen?
318
00:22:09,871 --> 00:22:12,874
Perry Love was that guy
that just made everything better.
319
00:22:13,500 --> 00:22:16,920
He was like air conditioning.
And then he was news.
320
00:22:17,628 --> 00:22:18,921
We all became news.
321
00:22:19,005 --> 00:22:22,801
The popping was given the sexy moniker
of "The Covington Curse."
322
00:22:23,425 --> 00:22:25,010
Stupid fucking curse.
323
00:22:25,095 --> 00:22:26,971
By the way, Perry Love was gay.
324
00:22:27,055 --> 00:22:29,057
I didn't even know that
until the memorial.
325
00:22:29,140 --> 00:22:32,769
And when my bro came out to us
in sixth grade, we loved him.
326
00:22:33,519 --> 00:22:34,645
Come on.
327
00:22:34,729 --> 00:22:36,271
Because he was our best bro.
328
00:22:37,773 --> 00:22:39,400
And we're progressive like that.
329
00:22:41,152 --> 00:22:42,278
Our boy...
330
00:22:44,029 --> 00:22:46,657
Our boy was too much rock
for this world, bitch!
331
00:22:51,871 --> 00:22:53,206
It was a nice moment.
332
00:22:53,832 --> 00:22:55,709
Of course, what we didn't know
at the time was...
333
00:22:55,791 --> 00:22:57,251
School's canceled.
334
00:23:00,422 --> 00:23:01,673
For how long?
335
00:23:05,844 --> 00:23:07,761
But we're just going to
keep applying to colleges.
336
00:23:07,846 --> 00:23:10,682
So you'll be all set once this blows over.
337
00:23:17,313 --> 00:23:18,732
Well, at least now you can't say,
338
00:23:18,815 --> 00:23:20,942
"Things were so much harder
back in my day."
339
00:23:23,236 --> 00:23:24,612
You're right.
340
00:23:25,779 --> 00:23:27,781
You have it way worse.
341
00:23:53,641 --> 00:23:55,143
Oh, my God.
342
00:23:55,934 --> 00:23:58,937
Of course, you don't drive a Hyundai
or something like that.
343
00:23:59,730 --> 00:24:01,357
It reminded me of this Springsteen song.
344
00:24:01,941 --> 00:24:04,361
- Which one?
- The one about the milk truck driver.
345
00:24:04,443 --> 00:24:06,570
There's a Springsteen song
about a milk truck driver?
346
00:24:06,653 --> 00:24:10,157
- Guess you'll have to find out.
- I swear to God, I'm never gonna find out.
347
00:24:10,240 --> 00:24:11,576
I just bought it today.
348
00:24:12,951 --> 00:24:14,162
Why?
349
00:24:16,748 --> 00:24:20,669
I was saving up for a college car,
but then I thought I might die tomorrow.
350
00:24:20,751 --> 00:24:22,961
- So I went to the dealer...
- Of milk trucks.
351
00:24:23,046 --> 00:24:26,758
And I saw it and I laughed and I thought
other people would laugh too.
352
00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:29,176
It was cheap, so why not?
353
00:24:30,178 --> 00:24:32,347
Just get me through till graduation, baby.
354
00:24:32,888 --> 00:24:34,348
That should be our school slogan.
355
00:24:34,932 --> 00:24:36,017
It really should.
356
00:24:36,601 --> 00:24:37,644
You ready to go?
357
00:24:38,228 --> 00:24:39,395
In your milk truck?
358
00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:41,230
Fuck, yeah.
359
00:24:41,815 --> 00:24:42,816
Fuck, no!
360
00:24:43,566 --> 00:24:45,192
We are never forgetting them!
361
00:24:50,740 --> 00:24:52,282
- I love you, bro.
- I love you too, man.
362
00:24:52,366 --> 00:24:54,243
I love you guys too.
363
00:24:58,205 --> 00:24:59,915
I really need this drink.
Can I take it? Please?
364
00:25:00,000 --> 00:25:02,085
- Why, why, why?
- Please, please. I'm gonna grab it.
365
00:25:02,167 --> 00:25:04,128
- Okay?
- Okay.
366
00:25:04,211 --> 00:25:05,379
Have fun.
367
00:25:14,013 --> 00:25:15,431
You wanna go for a walk?
368
00:25:16,307 --> 00:25:17,599
I love walks.
369
00:25:26,984 --> 00:25:29,862
- How's your drink?
- It's very tequila-y.
370
00:25:30,696 --> 00:25:33,907
Hey, are you drinking...
Yeah, you're drinking straight tequila.
371
00:25:33,991 --> 00:25:36,076
I mean... no?
372
00:25:37,244 --> 00:25:38,912
I'm just drinking beer.
373
00:25:38,997 --> 00:25:40,331
Drink big, bro!
374
00:25:41,583 --> 00:25:43,915
Wait. Wait, wait, wait.
375
00:25:43,917 --> 00:25:46,211
What if alcohol is what makes it happen?
376
00:25:48,131 --> 00:25:49,798
No!
377
00:25:57,973 --> 00:25:59,350
What do you think does?
378
00:26:00,934 --> 00:26:01,935
I don't know.
379
00:26:02,019 --> 00:26:04,314
- That's not good enough!
- Well, I don't!
380
00:26:04,897 --> 00:26:07,817
The cosmic bullshit
of the universe, right?
381
00:26:08,609 --> 00:26:10,611
- Lame.
- I'm sorry.
382
00:26:16,076 --> 00:26:18,661
I'm writing this book
called All The Feels.
383
00:26:19,203 --> 00:26:21,538
It's about this guy
who when he touches people,
384
00:26:21,623 --> 00:26:23,917
he takes all their feelings
and then they die.
385
00:26:25,501 --> 00:26:28,797
I just wanted you to know something
about me that no one else does.
386
00:26:29,547 --> 00:26:31,758
- Are you drunk?
- Dude, yeah.
387
00:26:32,549 --> 00:26:34,176
- Are you?
- No.
388
00:26:35,886 --> 00:26:37,638
How many cups have you had?
389
00:26:39,766 --> 00:26:40,892
I don't know.
390
00:26:41,476 --> 00:26:42,894
Oh, shit.
391
00:26:45,145 --> 00:26:46,772
Tell me something, just for me.
392
00:26:49,983 --> 00:26:53,654
Okay, well, after my dad died,
393
00:26:54,321 --> 00:26:59,159
I would go to this old barn
with a tape player
394
00:26:59,243 --> 00:27:01,036
and dance by myself.
395
00:27:02,247 --> 00:27:03,914
Like, to Bon Jovi.
396
00:27:05,541 --> 00:27:07,501
Yeah, I'd just cry and dance
397
00:27:07,585 --> 00:27:11,338
and then rewind and cry and dance.
398
00:27:11,423 --> 00:27:14,092
That's the saddest thing I've ever heard.
399
00:27:14,718 --> 00:27:16,970
And people are literally blowing up.
400
00:27:19,972 --> 00:27:22,099
Actually, they're not just people.
401
00:27:22,808 --> 00:27:24,644
They're seniors.
402
00:27:24,728 --> 00:27:26,855
- Is that true?
- Yeah.
403
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:30,733
Also, we stopped walking.
404
00:27:32,902 --> 00:27:34,821
The shocks keep coming.
405
00:27:46,082 --> 00:27:48,251
I really wanna kiss you, man.
406
00:27:49,752 --> 00:27:50,878
Yeah?
407
00:27:51,962 --> 00:27:53,048
Yeah.
408
00:28:21,910 --> 00:28:24,120
- We should probably go, right?
- No.
409
00:28:30,626 --> 00:28:32,127
You taste like tequila.
410
00:28:48,811 --> 00:28:50,270
Fuck me.
411
00:28:59,948 --> 00:29:02,784
Special Agent Rosetti.
Thank you, ladies, for coming in.
412
00:29:03,367 --> 00:29:06,913
Let me be the first to say,
I'm... I'm truly sorry.
413
00:29:06,996 --> 00:29:09,874
- It's okay.
- Yeah. I mean, it could be worse, right?
414
00:29:09,958 --> 00:29:11,375
We could be Republicans.
415
00:29:12,836 --> 00:29:13,877
That was funny.
416
00:29:14,712 --> 00:29:15,922
Thank you.
417
00:29:16,006 --> 00:29:19,509
So, you ladies blow people up?
418
00:29:20,926 --> 00:29:22,011
No, ma'am.
419
00:29:23,179 --> 00:29:25,223
Do you think there's someone
killing everyone?
420
00:29:25,306 --> 00:29:27,726
I think we've effectively ruled that out.
421
00:29:27,808 --> 00:29:31,186
I mean, unless there's a mad scientist
or a warlock on the loose.
422
00:29:31,270 --> 00:29:35,191
Kids are literally blowing up, so, I mean,
that could be a possibility, right?
423
00:29:35,942 --> 00:29:37,693
If you believe in warlocks.
424
00:29:38,694 --> 00:29:40,821
I don't know what I believe anymore.
425
00:29:42,031 --> 00:29:45,076
Do you have any idea
why it's happening, though?
426
00:29:46,036 --> 00:29:49,038
At the moment, no.
427
00:29:49,122 --> 00:29:51,583
But we're close to figuring it out.
428
00:29:54,376 --> 00:29:56,003
Or so I'm told.
429
00:29:57,756 --> 00:29:59,966
Wait, so what you're saying is,
we're fucked.
430
00:30:00,049 --> 00:30:02,634
No. What I'm saying is that I need help.
431
00:30:04,095 --> 00:30:07,640
Listen. Everyone's scared,
and scared people all want the same thing.
432
00:30:07,723 --> 00:30:09,224
Which is?
433
00:30:09,808 --> 00:30:11,394
To survive.
434
00:30:12,436 --> 00:30:14,063
- Right.
- Yeah.
435
00:30:14,814 --> 00:30:16,983
- We would actually love to survive.
- Yeah.
436
00:30:17,067 --> 00:30:18,777
- That'd be sick.
- Good.
437
00:30:19,443 --> 00:30:21,153
So bring me something.
438
00:30:23,114 --> 00:30:24,406
What do you want?
439
00:30:26,576 --> 00:30:27,576
Drugs?
440
00:30:27,660 --> 00:30:29,204
That's what she said.
441
00:30:29,287 --> 00:30:31,456
She thinks drugs is making us pop?
442
00:30:31,538 --> 00:30:33,958
I think it's less accusational and more,
443
00:30:34,041 --> 00:30:37,586
what the holy fuck is going on,
let's rule shit out-onal.
444
00:30:38,003 --> 00:30:41,799
So, you're not gonna tell
this Scully wannabe they came from us?
445
00:30:41,883 --> 00:30:45,386
Girl, do I look
like Benicio Del Toro to you?
446
00:30:48,056 --> 00:30:49,307
I don't know what that means.
447
00:30:49,391 --> 00:30:52,227
Me neither. I need to rewatch Traffic.
448
00:30:53,769 --> 00:30:55,355
We're gonna sidebar.
449
00:30:55,438 --> 00:30:57,273
- Do your thing.
- Okay.
450
00:31:00,484 --> 00:31:01,902
What? What do you think?
451
00:31:01,986 --> 00:31:04,197
I think we gotta get rid of them.
452
00:31:04,989 --> 00:31:06,700
- I got her to go for it too.
- Okay.
453
00:31:07,991 --> 00:31:10,828
All right, we're down. What do you want?
454
00:31:10,912 --> 00:31:12,247
That's the best part.
455
00:31:12,329 --> 00:31:14,374
America's reimbursing me.
456
00:31:16,459 --> 00:31:18,586
- So you're buying...
- Everything.
457
00:31:23,674 --> 00:31:24,759
God bless America!
458
00:31:24,843 --> 00:31:27,220
Okay. I'm gonna get the keys.
459
00:31:27,303 --> 00:31:28,388
Keys?
460
00:31:29,847 --> 00:31:31,807
We don't keep our shit at home.
461
00:31:33,183 --> 00:31:34,728
We hide it.
462
00:31:34,810 --> 00:31:36,730
Never know when the feds
are gonna fuck ya.
463
00:31:38,772 --> 00:31:40,482
I have a question.
464
00:31:40,567 --> 00:31:41,942
Suitcase-related?
465
00:31:42,027 --> 00:31:43,653
Suitcase-related.
466
00:31:43,737 --> 00:31:45,989
- Leaving Jersey tomorrow.
- Yeah.
467
00:31:46,071 --> 00:31:47,781
Getting the fuck outta Dodge.
468
00:31:47,865 --> 00:31:49,408
Do you guys think it's Covington?
469
00:31:49,491 --> 00:31:52,578
I don't know what it is, but I also
don't really want to find out.
470
00:31:53,454 --> 00:31:55,956
So how you been holding up
during all this garbage?
471
00:31:57,208 --> 00:31:58,752
Hanging in, yo.
472
00:31:58,835 --> 00:32:00,920
Started making out with a real sweet boy.
473
00:32:01,003 --> 00:32:02,796
No shit! Who?
474
00:32:02,881 --> 00:32:04,257
I'll see you in twenty.
Don't do shrooms!
475
00:32:04,715 --> 00:32:05,883
Hovemeyer.
476
00:32:07,218 --> 00:32:08,553
You know, the world is a cra...
477
00:32:17,686 --> 00:32:20,606
Fuck! Go, go, go!
478
00:32:20,690 --> 00:32:22,275
- Fuck!
- It's flooded with Joe.
479
00:32:22,358 --> 00:32:24,234
Hurry! Jenna, come on!
480
00:32:24,318 --> 00:32:27,404
Wait. I can't see anything. I can't...
481
00:32:27,489 --> 00:32:30,325
- Put your foot on the brake.
- His shoes are there.
482
00:32:30,407 --> 00:32:32,659
I'll move his shoes. Just steer.
483
00:33:22,585 --> 00:33:23,711
Mara!
484
00:33:25,337 --> 00:33:26,548
Mara!
485
00:33:30,759 --> 00:33:31,927
Mara!
486
00:33:32,679 --> 00:33:33,805
Mara!
487
00:33:34,888 --> 00:33:36,015
Mara.
488
00:33:37,642 --> 00:33:39,269
Are you okay? Are you okay?
489
00:33:42,313 --> 00:33:44,983
Are you okay? Where's Joe and Jenna?
490
00:33:45,066 --> 00:33:47,777
- I think they're dead.
- They are?
491
00:33:49,278 --> 00:33:53,282
I tried to get them off,
but they won't come out of my clothes.
492
00:33:54,409 --> 00:33:56,076
I thought it was you.
493
00:34:15,972 --> 00:34:18,682
No. Dude, the sweat suit?
494
00:34:18,766 --> 00:34:21,226
Sorry, I just didn't have time to think.
495
00:34:22,019 --> 00:34:23,313
I'm not wearing this.
496
00:34:27,317 --> 00:34:28,568
Hey, I called Rosetti.
497
00:34:29,693 --> 00:34:30,695
Smart.
498
00:34:41,039 --> 00:34:42,791
What was it like?
499
00:34:47,336 --> 00:34:49,463
It really fucking sucked.
500
00:35:03,811 --> 00:35:06,230
What the hell is this ET bullshit?
501
00:35:09,525 --> 00:35:11,610
Hey. Hey.
502
00:35:11,695 --> 00:35:13,405
Hey, get your fucking hands off of him!
503
00:35:13,487 --> 00:35:16,323
- Hey, get your fucking hands off of him!
- Hey, don't grab her!
504
00:35:16,407 --> 00:35:18,742
- Put her down! Stop!
- Get your fucking hands off of me!
505
00:35:18,827 --> 00:35:21,204
- Mara!
- Get your hands off of me right now!
506
00:35:21,286 --> 00:35:22,830
- Mara!
- I said, get off!
507
00:35:33,173 --> 00:35:36,635
Mara, I'm Dr. Rolanda.
508
00:35:37,804 --> 00:35:39,222
We're here to help you, okay?
509
00:35:40,556 --> 00:35:42,349
Help yourself, lady.
510
00:36:02,829 --> 00:36:04,080
Okay.
511
00:36:04,164 --> 00:36:07,042
This is just going to be
monitoring your vitals. That's all it is.
512
00:36:08,501 --> 00:36:10,670
We're just going to do
a little bit of blood work.
513
00:36:10,753 --> 00:36:13,088
Just making sure
that everything is normalized.
514
00:36:13,172 --> 00:36:15,632
We're gonna get you out of here
in no time.
515
00:36:15,717 --> 00:36:18,677
- Okay, okay.
- All right. It's okay, it's okay.
516
00:36:20,972 --> 00:36:22,599
ET.
517
00:36:29,688 --> 00:36:30,690
Elliott.
518
00:36:34,068 --> 00:36:36,362
ET.
519
00:36:37,780 --> 00:36:39,865
Elliott.
520
00:36:39,949 --> 00:36:42,911
ET!
521
00:36:42,994 --> 00:36:44,621
Elliott!
522
00:36:45,663 --> 00:36:49,333
ET!
523
00:36:59,552 --> 00:37:00,762
Hey, Mara.
524
00:37:03,014 --> 00:37:05,392
Mara. Hey.
525
00:37:06,601 --> 00:37:07,602
Yo.
526
00:37:10,355 --> 00:37:11,563
Where are we?
527
00:37:13,400 --> 00:37:14,567
I don't know.
528
00:37:15,275 --> 00:37:17,528
But I think they're doing tests on us.
529
00:37:17,612 --> 00:37:19,114
The whole class is here.
530
00:37:32,501 --> 00:37:34,545
They asked me a bunch of questions.
531
00:37:36,172 --> 00:37:37,298
Like what?
532
00:37:37,840 --> 00:37:40,426
Like what I've had to eat and drink
in the past couple months,
533
00:37:40,510 --> 00:37:42,512
and the places I've visited.
534
00:37:43,221 --> 00:37:45,597
And my list of sexual partners.
535
00:37:46,641 --> 00:37:47,767
What did you say?
536
00:37:49,476 --> 00:37:52,480
I just told them... your mom.
537
00:37:55,190 --> 00:37:58,235
- Nice.
- I knew you'd like that one.
538
00:38:02,282 --> 00:38:03,408
Have you ever done it?
539
00:38:08,621 --> 00:38:09,831
Are you gonna ask me?
540
00:38:13,126 --> 00:38:14,919
I don't actually care.
541
00:38:15,795 --> 00:38:17,255
You don't?
542
00:38:18,340 --> 00:38:19,548
No.
543
00:38:19,632 --> 00:38:23,677
Just don't, like, screw anyone
while you're my girlfriend.
544
00:38:25,472 --> 00:38:26,681
Am I your girlfriend?
545
00:38:28,474 --> 00:38:29,893
- Are you?
- Am I?
546
00:38:31,936 --> 00:38:34,105
Do you wanna be my girlfriend?
547
00:38:39,818 --> 00:38:41,820
I guess that would be fine.
548
00:38:46,576 --> 00:38:47,702
Cool.
549
00:38:54,541 --> 00:38:56,543
What's gonna happen to us now?
550
00:38:57,628 --> 00:39:00,923
I think we just, you know, date.
551
00:39:02,300 --> 00:39:04,552
No, I meant in this plastic world.
552
00:39:08,139 --> 00:39:12,519
I think this is our life now.
553
00:39:24,905 --> 00:39:28,367
So, our beloved government
quarantined us in tents,
554
00:39:28,451 --> 00:39:31,538
trying to make pills that would
keep our blood inside our bodies.
555
00:39:31,621 --> 00:39:32,706
It was a blast.
556
00:39:33,206 --> 00:39:34,958
What's your name for the record, please?
557
00:39:35,041 --> 00:39:36,876
Mara Carlyle.
558
00:39:36,960 --> 00:39:39,128
Cox. Steve Cox.
559
00:39:39,211 --> 00:39:41,047
- Cole.
- Cole what?
560
00:39:41,715 --> 00:39:43,967
Cole wants a lawyer.
561
00:39:44,884 --> 00:39:47,887
- How old are you, Becky?
- Seventeen.
562
00:39:47,971 --> 00:39:49,806
- Seventeen.
- I'm 17.
563
00:39:51,016 --> 00:39:52,392
Not for long.
564
00:39:53,643 --> 00:39:55,686
What can you tell me about Katelyn Ogden?
565
00:39:55,769 --> 00:39:58,523
She's hot. I'd tap it.
566
00:39:59,190 --> 00:40:00,942
I was gonna take her to prom.
567
00:40:01,025 --> 00:40:02,943
Tell me about Perry Love.
568
00:40:03,027 --> 00:40:04,153
He was hot.
569
00:40:05,030 --> 00:40:06,197
I'd tap that too.
570
00:40:06,280 --> 00:40:09,034
- What did you dream about last night?
- Doughnuts.
571
00:40:09,117 --> 00:40:10,785
You can ask my lawyer.
572
00:40:10,869 --> 00:40:13,954
- Do you get angry, Becky?
- Yeah, I'm angry all the time.
573
00:40:14,039 --> 00:40:16,666
- Are you angry right now?
- Fuck, yeah.
574
00:40:16,750 --> 00:40:19,585
What is it you want to do in college?
575
00:40:20,795 --> 00:40:22,422
Stay alive.
576
00:40:27,302 --> 00:40:28,928
At least we were comfortable.
577
00:40:29,637 --> 00:40:31,264
So uncomfortable.
578
00:40:33,349 --> 00:40:34,808
Always smells weird in here.
579
00:40:35,601 --> 00:40:38,730
Like feet and cinnamon buns.
580
00:40:40,190 --> 00:40:41,483
Yeah, more feet.
581
00:40:45,612 --> 00:40:46,780
You okay?
582
00:40:49,490 --> 00:40:51,076
What if it happens to you?
583
00:40:52,952 --> 00:40:55,538
- It won't.
- How do you know that?
584
00:40:57,831 --> 00:40:59,000
Promise.
585
00:40:59,918 --> 00:41:01,211
I can't promise you.
586
00:41:01,293 --> 00:41:03,170
No, why? Just promise me.
587
00:41:04,838 --> 00:41:06,048
Promise or I'll scream.
588
00:41:11,721 --> 00:41:13,472
- Stop it.
- Promise. Please.
589
00:41:13,556 --> 00:41:15,099
It'll be fine.
590
00:41:16,226 --> 00:41:20,980
That's not very convincing.
But if you go, like, I'm coming.
591
00:41:21,606 --> 00:41:23,942
And if I go, I'm taking you too.
592
00:41:25,275 --> 00:41:28,987
I'm serious.
We're being roomies down there.
593
00:41:29,072 --> 00:41:30,699
'Cause we both know
we're not going up there.
594
00:41:30,782 --> 00:41:33,117
I'm fucking down. I love you. Oh, my God.
595
00:41:33,201 --> 00:41:34,952
- I love you too.
- Down to that.
596
00:41:46,505 --> 00:41:49,466
I am so bored!
597
00:41:50,802 --> 00:41:52,512
I'm so bored!
598
00:41:52,594 --> 00:41:54,388
How long do we have to stay
in this condom?
599
00:41:54,472 --> 00:41:56,057
For a while, I think.
600
00:41:56,141 --> 00:41:58,351
At least we know we're super healthy.
601
00:42:00,603 --> 00:42:02,563
- We should try to break out.
- I already tried that.
602
00:42:03,023 --> 00:42:04,566
Why would we try and break out?
603
00:42:04,648 --> 00:42:06,859
I got here as soon as I heard
about this place.
604
00:42:06,943 --> 00:42:08,403
This is where they're going to cure us.
605
00:42:08,485 --> 00:42:12,489
Those conservative weirdos with the signs,
they said that we were cursed.
606
00:42:12,574 --> 00:42:16,244
Everyone's online trying to figure out
why it's happening and who's next.
607
00:42:16,911 --> 00:42:18,663
Whose fault do they think it is?
608
00:42:18,746 --> 00:42:20,581
Bro, it's no one's fault.
609
00:42:21,791 --> 00:42:23,710
But if it's a curse, it's someone's fault.
610
00:42:23,793 --> 00:42:25,211
But, bro, there's no curse.
611
00:42:26,128 --> 00:42:28,047
I don't care why it's happening.
612
00:42:28,130 --> 00:42:29,882
I just want to figure out how to stop it.
613
00:42:29,965 --> 00:42:31,967
Maybe we just have to graduate.
614
00:42:36,056 --> 00:42:39,016
I'm looking at you right now
and really feel like we should make out.
615
00:42:39,601 --> 00:42:40,643
Stop.
616
00:42:41,978 --> 00:42:43,855
- Stop making that face.
- What face?
617
00:42:51,528 --> 00:42:53,197
Hey. How are you doing?
618
00:42:54,324 --> 00:42:55,407
Right now?
619
00:42:56,451 --> 00:43:00,121
No. I mean, like,
with the Daltons and everything.
620
00:43:01,539 --> 00:43:03,750
Can we talk about it later?
621
00:43:05,835 --> 00:43:08,045
I just want you to know
you can talk to me.
622
00:43:08,672 --> 00:43:10,798
I'd rather just make out with you.
623
00:43:10,882 --> 00:43:14,552
- But later, I mean.
- There is no later.
624
00:43:17,137 --> 00:43:19,223
That was fucking deep, son.
625
00:43:20,516 --> 00:43:21,934
That's what your mom said.
626
00:43:22,434 --> 00:43:24,269
That was great!
627
00:43:28,023 --> 00:43:30,275
We know these are scary times.
628
00:43:30,735 --> 00:43:34,948
But with your help, we are sure
a cure is right around the corner.
629
00:43:38,702 --> 00:43:40,412
Now, we know this hasn't been ideal,
630
00:43:40,494 --> 00:43:45,000
but we're doing everything we can to help
solve this problem as quickly as possible.
631
00:43:45,083 --> 00:43:48,711
We in Washington will continue
to push forward to find a cure,
632
00:43:48,795 --> 00:43:52,673
so that you good kids can go back
to the lives that you so richly deserve.
633
00:43:53,925 --> 00:43:55,844
Now, does anybody have any questions?
634
00:43:55,927 --> 00:43:57,429
- Yeah.
- Yes.
635
00:43:57,512 --> 00:43:59,597
Firstly, thank you for talking to us.
636
00:43:59,681 --> 00:44:00,974
- Super cool.
- You're very welcome.
637
00:44:01,056 --> 00:44:03,434
Secondly, how come whenever
someone from Washington
638
00:44:03,518 --> 00:44:05,311
says that they're doing everything
to help us,
639
00:44:05,394 --> 00:44:09,231
it usually means that nothing
is getting done and we're all screwed?
640
00:44:13,485 --> 00:44:15,279
Perhaps my PowerPoint wasn't clear...
641
00:44:15,362 --> 00:44:17,740
No, it was clear. It just sucked.
642
00:44:18,324 --> 00:44:20,994
Unless this is a magical slide show
that can cure us,
643
00:44:21,077 --> 00:44:24,706
I don't get what you're doing
that can actually help us.
644
00:44:24,789 --> 00:44:27,500
Hey, I get it. I do.
645
00:44:27,583 --> 00:44:29,626
You have every reason to be angry.
646
00:44:29,710 --> 00:44:33,881
But I just want all of you to know that
you have all of our thoughts and prayers.
647
00:44:35,842 --> 00:44:37,427
I don't want that shit unless it works.
648
00:44:38,052 --> 00:44:40,054
If you can't fix us, then just tell us.
649
00:44:40,137 --> 00:44:42,514
We have too many assclowns
lying to us as it is.
650
00:44:42,599 --> 00:44:43,807
Mara is right.
651
00:44:44,516 --> 00:44:46,101
You politicians don't care about us.
652
00:44:46,186 --> 00:44:49,105
The only people who care about us is us.
653
00:44:49,188 --> 00:44:51,815
Quakers! Yeah, baby!
654
00:44:51,900 --> 00:44:53,360
Quakers! Quakers!
655
00:44:53,443 --> 00:44:54,861
Quakers! Quakers!
656
00:44:54,943 --> 00:44:56,695
Quakers! Quakers! Quakers!
657
00:46:14,606 --> 00:46:16,025
Go fuck yourself.
658
00:47:04,449 --> 00:47:05,492
Mom.
659
00:47:13,416 --> 00:47:14,918
Yes!
660
00:47:17,628 --> 00:47:19,880
Wait. Where are all
the Christmas decorations?
661
00:47:21,382 --> 00:47:24,051
I don't think people
felt very festive this year, you know.
662
00:47:25,719 --> 00:47:27,179
- Yeah.
- Bummer.
663
00:47:43,445 --> 00:47:45,699
Oh, my God! You got a tree!
664
00:47:45,782 --> 00:47:47,158
We got a tree!
665
00:47:47,242 --> 00:47:49,994
Oh, my God! This is so cool!
666
00:47:50,077 --> 00:47:52,579
A real one too.
Not one of those fake ones.
667
00:47:52,664 --> 00:47:54,874
We gotta put some more ornaments
on this thing.
668
00:47:54,958 --> 00:47:57,836
I'm gonna go get changed.
I'm gonna go get changed. Wait right here.
669
00:47:58,253 --> 00:48:01,423
I'm home!
670
00:48:02,757 --> 00:48:03,967
Room!
671
00:48:05,677 --> 00:48:08,555
Are they really gonna call the pill
the Snooze Button?
672
00:48:08,637 --> 00:48:11,016
That's what that Dr. Rolanda lady
said on the news.
673
00:48:11,099 --> 00:48:12,392
Yeah. I know her.
674
00:48:12,851 --> 00:48:14,269
She's pretty professional.
675
00:48:15,228 --> 00:48:16,604
For a bitch.
676
00:48:16,688 --> 00:48:19,648
She can call it whatever she wants
as long as it works.
677
00:48:20,190 --> 00:48:21,275
True that.
678
00:48:23,193 --> 00:48:25,447
That is a sweet tree.
679
00:48:26,405 --> 00:48:27,407
Hey.
680
00:48:32,871 --> 00:48:34,079
This feels like a trap.
681
00:48:34,164 --> 00:48:36,750
We know you smoke pot.
You're terrible at hiding it.
682
00:48:36,833 --> 00:48:38,251
- No, I'm not.
- Yes, you are.
683
00:48:39,835 --> 00:48:41,670
Just let him be the cool dad.
684
00:48:46,425 --> 00:48:48,802
You're busted. I'm just joking.
685
00:48:57,478 --> 00:48:58,730
Come on.
686
00:49:09,907 --> 00:49:12,034
Is this what adulthood is like?
687
00:49:12,952 --> 00:49:18,083
Yeah, it's like this, except with
more anxiety and complete terror.
688
00:49:20,293 --> 00:49:22,461
We just gotta get you through graduation.
689
00:49:23,338 --> 00:49:27,050
Everyone keeps saying that.
You really think that's the winner?
690
00:49:29,760 --> 00:49:31,346
I gotta think something.
691
00:49:35,474 --> 00:49:36,976
Sick tree!
692
00:49:58,914 --> 00:50:01,668
I don't think I've ever been
in a girl's room before.
693
00:50:02,918 --> 00:50:04,086
I mean, one that I've dated.
694
00:50:04,170 --> 00:50:06,798
Well, I guess you can
tick that off your bucket list.
695
00:50:10,385 --> 00:50:11,928
Also, I got you a present.
696
00:50:12,012 --> 00:50:14,764
No! I haven't had time to get you one.
697
00:50:17,434 --> 00:50:18,435
What?
698
00:50:20,853 --> 00:50:22,021
What is it?
699
00:50:23,023 --> 00:50:25,608
It's my body...
700
00:50:27,568 --> 00:50:30,904
in a sexual situation.
701
00:50:38,788 --> 00:50:40,248
Never gotten that before.
702
00:50:42,083 --> 00:50:43,376
You okay?
703
00:50:49,882 --> 00:50:51,467
Can I tell you something?
704
00:50:52,385 --> 00:50:53,428
Yeah.
705
00:50:55,637 --> 00:50:58,849
I'm just so glad
I didn't explode all over you.
706
00:51:01,436 --> 00:51:03,563
I just kept thinking,
please don't explode.
707
00:51:03,646 --> 00:51:05,481
Please don't explode.
708
00:51:05,565 --> 00:51:08,275
- You guys have it so tough.
- So tough.
709
00:51:11,112 --> 00:51:12,572
I really like you.
710
00:51:14,490 --> 00:51:16,076
I really like you too.
711
00:51:33,217 --> 00:51:35,094
Do you think we're safe now?
712
00:51:37,179 --> 00:51:39,473
I don't know. I hope so.
713
00:51:40,182 --> 00:51:42,393
I say we just stick to the plan,
go back to school
714
00:51:42,476 --> 00:51:44,186
and take it one day at a time.
715
00:51:44,269 --> 00:51:45,396
What?
716
00:51:47,065 --> 00:51:49,400
- What to what?
- The school part.
717
00:51:51,110 --> 00:51:52,778
You didn't hear?
718
00:51:53,362 --> 00:51:54,905
No!
719
00:51:54,989 --> 00:51:56,574
Come on. Go!
720
00:51:57,157 --> 00:51:59,451
Move! Come on!
721
00:52:00,869 --> 00:52:01,913
Move!
722
00:52:04,289 --> 00:52:06,918
All the other classes
are meeting at the community center
723
00:52:07,001 --> 00:52:08,503
so they don't catch our disease.
724
00:52:08,585 --> 00:52:09,795
Why?
725
00:52:10,463 --> 00:52:11,840
It could be worse.
726
00:52:12,673 --> 00:52:13,675
How?
727
00:52:14,134 --> 00:52:15,427
We could be like Katelyn.
728
00:52:15,510 --> 00:52:18,596
Katelyn wasn't the first person
I saw blow up.
729
00:52:19,472 --> 00:52:21,182
When I was stationed...
730
00:52:22,307 --> 00:52:27,438
I saw a buddy of mine, Mark Jensen,
step on a land mine.
731
00:52:27,938 --> 00:52:29,732
No goodbyes, no last words.
732
00:52:29,815 --> 00:52:32,943
Just... that's it.
733
00:52:34,403 --> 00:52:35,572
That was it.
734
00:52:36,697 --> 00:52:39,783
I'm not about to sit here and tell you
that everything is gonna be okay,
735
00:52:39,867 --> 00:52:41,161
because that's bullshit.
736
00:52:41,994 --> 00:52:43,454
I mean, I don't know.
737
00:52:45,081 --> 00:52:47,876
But I do know
that I will help you graduate.
738
00:52:49,126 --> 00:52:51,086
- That sound good?
- Yeah.
739
00:52:51,170 --> 00:52:52,172
Yeah?
740
00:52:54,798 --> 00:52:56,092
Cole.
741
00:52:58,302 --> 00:52:59,887
Can I get a bathroom pass?
742
00:53:04,059 --> 00:53:05,268
Just go, man.
743
00:53:30,918 --> 00:53:33,128
You're not gonna abduct us again, are you?
744
00:53:33,213 --> 00:53:35,048
Firstly, I never did that.
745
00:53:35,130 --> 00:53:37,091
Secondly, no.
746
00:53:37,175 --> 00:53:38,677
We're really confident that the Snooze...
747
00:53:38,760 --> 00:53:40,679
Don't say it.
748
00:53:42,764 --> 00:53:44,891
Snooze Button.
749
00:53:46,059 --> 00:53:47,143
Fuck.
750
00:53:47,226 --> 00:53:48,769
What do you have against it?
751
00:53:49,228 --> 00:53:52,064
- Literally just the name.
- Okay. What would you call it?
752
00:53:52,190 --> 00:53:54,943
I don't know. Something sciencey.
753
00:53:55,025 --> 00:53:57,903
It has a sciencey name
that nobody remembers.
754
00:53:57,987 --> 00:54:01,825
Why? 'Cause it's a dozen syllables long.
Hence, the nickname.
755
00:54:01,907 --> 00:54:04,993
Thank you so much for FBI-splaining
the concept of nicknames to me.
756
00:54:05,077 --> 00:54:07,663
You're welcome. Now get out of here.
You're healthy.
757
00:54:11,543 --> 00:54:12,794
Why are you still here?
758
00:54:14,128 --> 00:54:16,422
In my office? 'Cause I work here.
759
00:54:16,505 --> 00:54:19,134
No, like, if you think
it's all done and cured,
760
00:54:19,217 --> 00:54:20,552
why are you still here?
761
00:54:21,052 --> 00:54:23,762
There are a dozen grunts
that can take my blood pressure.
762
00:54:23,847 --> 00:54:24,848
You have a badge.
763
00:54:24,931 --> 00:54:26,599
Everyone here has a badge.
764
00:54:28,726 --> 00:54:30,436
You don't think it's done, do you?
765
00:54:33,815 --> 00:54:36,735
You know what they say. Hope for the best.
766
00:54:37,152 --> 00:54:38,778
Prepare for the worst!
767
00:54:40,612 --> 00:54:42,448
- Is that a sex thing?
- No.
768
00:54:42,907 --> 00:54:44,867
But maybe. Ready?
769
00:54:48,288 --> 00:54:50,248
- Yeah.
- You're good. Just go forward.
770
00:54:50,331 --> 00:54:51,666
Am I gonna hurt myself?
771
00:54:51,750 --> 00:54:54,585
You probably will,
but it won't be my fault.
772
00:54:55,503 --> 00:54:57,797
- What are you doing?
- I don't know. I'm just scared.
773
00:54:57,880 --> 00:54:59,590
- Why are you scared?
- I don't know.
774
00:54:59,673 --> 00:55:01,509
- I'm so trustworthy.
- I'm so nervous.
775
00:55:01,592 --> 00:55:02,760
It's okay.
776
00:55:02,844 --> 00:55:05,096
But you need to be careful
'cause this is a dangerous place.
777
00:55:05,179 --> 00:55:08,349
Okay. Wait, what does that mean?
What does that mean?
778
00:55:08,432 --> 00:55:10,143
What am I getting myself into?
779
00:55:10,226 --> 00:55:12,686
Stand right here. Ready?
And now you're gonna twirl.
780
00:55:12,771 --> 00:55:16,024
- One, two, three.
- This is fun. I like this.
781
00:55:16,065 --> 00:55:17,692
- Okay.
- Okay.
782
00:55:19,110 --> 00:55:20,528
- Are you ready?
- No.
783
00:55:21,278 --> 00:55:22,447
Okay, I'm ready.
784
00:55:28,827 --> 00:55:29,996
Were you prepared?
785
00:55:31,831 --> 00:55:32,874
No.
786
00:55:33,750 --> 00:55:38,588
I was like, what should I get my boy toy
for Valentine's/his birthday.
787
00:55:39,172 --> 00:55:43,677
And I thought, he had it so tough
when he was a kid,
788
00:55:44,302 --> 00:55:48,347
he would dance by himself in a barn
to '80s music.
789
00:55:53,853 --> 00:55:58,441
So maybe he'd like to know
he wasn't by himself anymore.
790
00:56:06,240 --> 00:56:08,117
- This is cool.
- Yeah?
791
00:56:09,119 --> 00:56:10,161
Yeah.
792
00:56:12,789 --> 00:56:13,915
Thanks, Mara.
793
00:56:58,126 --> 00:56:59,919
Can we talk about something?
794
00:57:00,670 --> 00:57:01,921
You're pregnant.
795
00:57:02,005 --> 00:57:03,715
I am. It's triplets.
796
00:57:03,797 --> 00:57:06,133
- My seed is mighty!
- It is.
797
00:57:08,762 --> 00:57:11,014
- Okay. Go on.
- Okay.
798
00:57:12,931 --> 00:57:14,683
What happens after we graduate?
799
00:57:15,434 --> 00:57:18,355
You mean, like, with us?
800
00:57:19,021 --> 00:57:20,148
Yeah.
801
00:57:20,940 --> 00:57:22,733
I actually haven't thought that far ahead.
802
00:57:22,817 --> 00:57:25,362
- I know, it's silly, but...
- I know I want to be with you.
803
00:57:27,072 --> 00:57:28,365
Yeah?
804
00:57:29,824 --> 00:57:31,492
Yeah. I mean...
805
00:57:31,576 --> 00:57:35,579
You're, like, the best thing to come out
of spontaneous combustions for me.
806
00:57:35,663 --> 00:57:38,166
- The very best?
- The very best.
807
00:57:38,248 --> 00:57:39,750
- I love you.
- Fuck!
808
00:57:41,335 --> 00:57:42,920
- You can't say that!
- I'm so sorry!
809
00:57:43,003 --> 00:57:44,588
You can't say that!
810
00:57:45,005 --> 00:57:47,132
- Are you kidding me?
- I'm sorry. I screwed that up.
811
00:57:47,217 --> 00:57:48,843
- Yeah, you did!
- Oh, my God!
812
00:57:49,302 --> 00:57:51,805
- Say it to me later on, okay?
- No.
813
00:57:52,722 --> 00:57:54,182
Okay. Yeah, I'll say it.
814
00:58:01,856 --> 00:58:02,941
Hey.
815
00:58:04,608 --> 00:58:08,822
Maybe this summer,
we can just drive around for a while.
816
00:58:10,114 --> 00:58:11,281
I'd like that.
817
00:58:12,909 --> 00:58:15,412
If we're not fleshy dead bits.
818
00:58:15,494 --> 00:58:17,329
If we're not fleshy dead bits.
819
00:58:30,635 --> 00:58:32,804
Have you heard
of the infinite monkey theorem?
820
00:58:32,887 --> 00:58:35,515
No, but I'm way into how that sounds.
821
00:58:36,141 --> 00:58:40,186
It's the idea of, like,
if you have infinite monkeys
822
00:58:40,269 --> 00:58:42,355
and you give them all infinite typewriters
823
00:58:42,438 --> 00:58:45,733
and an infinite amount of time,
they'll write Shakespeare.
824
00:58:46,985 --> 00:58:48,361
The word "Shakespeare"?
825
00:58:48,445 --> 00:58:50,280
No, like a full play of his.
826
00:58:50,362 --> 00:58:51,947
Sound like pretentious fucking monkeys.
827
00:58:52,032 --> 00:58:54,826
- Stop.
- Can't they write something else?
828
00:58:54,909 --> 00:58:58,204
They'll literally write every book
ever written, because they can't not.
829
00:58:59,039 --> 00:59:00,915
They can't... not.
830
00:59:01,666 --> 00:59:04,169
- I think about this a lot.
- Okay.
831
00:59:05,378 --> 00:59:07,588
I think it helps explain what's happening.
832
00:59:08,130 --> 00:59:10,841
You think monkeys are writing books
that make us explode?
833
00:59:10,925 --> 00:59:13,803
No, the idea that because
you can't say with certainty
834
00:59:13,887 --> 00:59:15,388
that something won't happen,
835
00:59:15,472 --> 00:59:18,141
then eventually it has to happen,
like the Big Bang.
836
00:59:19,391 --> 00:59:22,394
I like my idea about evil monkeys
writing plays better.
837
00:59:27,025 --> 00:59:28,485
This is taking forever, isn't it?
838
00:59:31,570 --> 00:59:33,030
I don't think she's coming.
839
00:59:35,532 --> 00:59:37,493
No one's ever been scared of me before.
840
00:59:38,744 --> 00:59:39,953
Let's go somewhere else.
841
00:59:40,038 --> 00:59:42,331
No. This is where we go.
842
00:59:42,414 --> 00:59:44,541
This is our spot. This is our thing.
843
00:59:44,626 --> 00:59:49,047
I know.
But maybe it's not our thing anymore.
844
00:59:57,554 --> 00:59:58,681
Whatever.
845
01:00:04,436 --> 01:00:07,940
The last thing I want is for you
to feel like science fair projects.
846
01:00:08,692 --> 01:00:11,568
Because of your help, the CDC and the FDA
847
01:00:11,652 --> 01:00:14,113
have been working around the clock
with Washington
848
01:00:14,197 --> 01:00:19,285
to make the Snooze Button available
over the counter to all Americans.
849
01:00:19,369 --> 01:00:22,247
So, what is the Snooze Button?
850
01:00:24,206 --> 01:00:28,002
For starters,
it's not, sadly, a cure, but it is...
851
01:00:29,628 --> 01:00:30,838
a treatment.
852
01:00:32,090 --> 01:00:33,341
Give you an example.
853
01:00:34,050 --> 01:00:35,719
Sometimes you're typing on your computer
854
01:00:35,802 --> 01:00:39,222
and, out of nowhere,
it turns off, crashes.
855
01:00:41,349 --> 01:00:43,559
When that happens to us,
we're not so lucky.
856
01:00:45,394 --> 01:00:46,603
Can I get a volunteer?
857
01:00:46,688 --> 01:00:47,814
Yeah.
858
01:00:49,440 --> 01:00:50,692
Steve, great. Come on up.
859
01:00:55,030 --> 01:00:56,948
Okay. Yes.
860
01:00:57,699 --> 01:01:00,617
- This is for our bros.
- Yeah!
861
01:01:00,702 --> 01:01:04,164
Okay. Steve, can I get you
to pat your head, please?
862
01:01:04,246 --> 01:01:05,289
That's it?
863
01:01:06,041 --> 01:01:07,083
Can you rub your belly?
864
01:01:07,625 --> 01:01:08,835
Yeah, come on.
865
01:01:09,543 --> 01:01:11,003
Okay, stand on one foot.
866
01:01:12,422 --> 01:01:13,548
Jump up and down.
867
01:01:16,300 --> 01:01:17,344
This is bullshit.
868
01:01:24,434 --> 01:01:25,435
Run!
869
01:01:32,400 --> 01:01:33,485
Mara!
870
01:01:33,985 --> 01:01:35,737
Come on, get up. Come on.
871
01:01:45,163 --> 01:01:46,748
- Mara!
- Tess!
872
01:01:52,878 --> 01:01:53,962
Come on.
873
01:02:21,032 --> 01:02:22,534
Open the door!
874
01:02:31,001 --> 01:02:33,378
Mara! Mara!
875
01:02:33,961 --> 01:02:36,297
Come on. This way is faster.
876
01:02:36,380 --> 01:02:38,465
- What the fuck is happening?
- They were wrong. They were...
877
01:02:41,427 --> 01:02:42,429
When you do...
878
01:03:16,045 --> 01:03:17,422
Mara!
879
01:03:29,641 --> 01:03:31,935
- Are you okay?
- No.
880
01:03:32,728 --> 01:03:35,522
- Are you?
- I'm just glad you're still here.
881
01:04:24,947 --> 01:04:27,574
A fragment of his jawbone hit my forehead.
882
01:04:31,746 --> 01:04:32,831
I never felt it.
883
01:04:32,914 --> 01:04:34,874
Mara! Mara!
884
01:04:38,460 --> 01:04:40,004
I never felt anything.
885
01:04:40,713 --> 01:04:41,797
Okay.
886
01:04:42,757 --> 01:04:44,009
Oh, my God.
887
01:04:45,969 --> 01:04:47,012
Hey.
888
01:05:13,204 --> 01:05:15,539
All I remember is wanting to die.
889
01:05:51,076 --> 01:05:52,077
Honey?
890
01:05:55,163 --> 01:05:56,914
Dylan's mom called for you.
891
01:05:58,541 --> 01:06:00,794
She just wanted to see how you were doing.
892
01:06:45,547 --> 01:06:47,132
Mara, can you open the door?
893
01:06:49,592 --> 01:06:50,677
Please.
894
01:06:53,554 --> 01:06:56,265
Mara, I just want to make sure
that you're okay.
895
01:07:07,985 --> 01:07:09,237
Oh, my God.
896
01:07:14,617 --> 01:07:17,202
All right, you're gonna need vodka...
897
01:07:18,038 --> 01:07:19,539
dry vermouth,
898
01:07:19,621 --> 01:07:21,373
grenadine and ice.
899
01:07:21,833 --> 01:07:24,001
Mix three parts vodka...
900
01:07:27,963 --> 01:07:30,759
with one part vermouth.
901
01:07:34,054 --> 01:07:35,472
Fill with ice...
902
01:07:36,639 --> 01:07:38,016
and stir...
903
01:07:40,393 --> 01:07:43,646
before pouring into a martini glass.
904
01:07:45,148 --> 01:07:46,149
Okay.
905
01:07:46,231 --> 01:07:47,942
And then, with the grenadine,
906
01:07:48,025 --> 01:07:52,196
you're gonna basically pour the entire
fucking bottle into the martini.
907
01:07:54,365 --> 01:07:58,036
And now you have my brand-new cocktail
which I've called,
908
01:07:58,119 --> 01:08:00,914
"All of My Friends
and Boyfriend Are Dead."
909
01:08:08,420 --> 01:08:10,589
Well, I have a couple of questions.
910
01:08:11,298 --> 01:08:13,217
Okay, but hold on.
911
01:08:13,300 --> 01:08:15,219
No, please don't.
912
01:08:21,309 --> 01:08:23,645
- You can have the next one.
- Okay.
913
01:08:25,020 --> 01:08:27,606
- I'm not equipped to deal with this.
- I know, right?
914
01:08:27,690 --> 01:08:31,485
But I've literally found one thing
that makes that feeling go away.
915
01:08:33,070 --> 01:08:34,447
What is it?
916
01:08:35,364 --> 01:08:36,782
Alcohol.
917
01:08:39,327 --> 01:08:42,329
- Why are you whispering?
- 'Cause it's a secret.
918
01:08:43,122 --> 01:08:45,375
'Cause I'm underage.
919
01:08:46,417 --> 01:08:48,127
Don't tell anyone, though.
920
01:09:25,789 --> 01:09:27,000
Tessy!
921
01:09:28,083 --> 01:09:29,085
Mara.
922
01:09:29,168 --> 01:09:31,755
Tessy! Let's go fuck shit up.
923
01:09:32,296 --> 01:09:34,548
- How did you get here?
- I walked, yo.
924
01:09:35,007 --> 01:09:36,925
- That's, like, ten miles.
- I know.
925
01:09:37,010 --> 01:09:38,970
I'm fucking Wonder Woman.
926
01:09:39,429 --> 01:09:40,971
Come on. Let's go do something.
927
01:09:43,099 --> 01:09:45,685
Let's go throw water balloons
full of red paint at kids.
928
01:09:45,769 --> 01:09:46,978
Mara.
929
01:09:47,061 --> 01:09:49,104
No. We have to go to school.
930
01:09:49,189 --> 01:09:50,481
Fuck school!
931
01:09:50,564 --> 01:09:52,024
No! I can't fuck school!
932
01:09:52,524 --> 01:09:54,777
I need to get the fuck out of here!
933
01:09:54,860 --> 01:09:58,489
And what happened to Dylan, it sucks.
It really fucking sucks. And I'm sorry.
934
01:09:58,989 --> 01:10:03,411
But people have been dying
for seven fucking months.
935
01:10:03,494 --> 01:10:06,206
I'm losing my mind. I don't want to die.
936
01:10:06,288 --> 01:10:07,498
Well...
937
01:10:08,957 --> 01:10:10,125
then don't die.
938
01:10:11,043 --> 01:10:12,252
- Easy.
- No.
939
01:10:12,337 --> 01:10:15,298
- Stop being a bitch. Help me out.
- I can't help you the way you want me to.
940
01:10:16,256 --> 01:10:17,509
How do I want you to?
941
01:10:18,217 --> 01:10:21,680
You want to stop existing
until you actually stop existing.
942
01:10:25,766 --> 01:10:28,228
- What's with the van?
- They don't want us driving anymore.
943
01:10:29,395 --> 01:10:31,605
Just come hang with me instead.
944
01:10:32,399 --> 01:10:36,152
If you don't, I'll never get
a beach house with you, ever. Ever.
945
01:10:36,235 --> 01:10:38,613
As if we're going to live
that long anyway.
946
01:10:51,042 --> 01:10:52,669
I fucking hate you!
947
01:11:46,055 --> 01:11:47,097
Fuck.
948
01:11:48,640 --> 01:11:49,641
Fuck.
949
01:12:00,819 --> 01:12:02,072
What's up?
950
01:12:14,501 --> 01:12:16,878
Hey, it's like a metaphor.
951
01:12:16,961 --> 01:12:18,963
- Mara.
- What?
952
01:12:19,046 --> 01:12:20,297
Are you gonna arrest me?
953
01:12:20,381 --> 01:12:22,007
No, I just came by
to see if you needed help.
954
01:12:22,091 --> 01:12:23,217
Here. Have a drink.
955
01:12:30,307 --> 01:12:31,850
What the fuck?
956
01:12:32,769 --> 01:12:34,479
An agent's car?
957
01:12:34,561 --> 01:12:36,105
It was funny at the time.
958
01:12:36,189 --> 01:12:38,817
It was funny? What time was it funny?
959
01:12:38,942 --> 01:12:41,319
- Like, 4:00.
- That's not what I fucking meant.
960
01:12:41,403 --> 01:12:42,529
No shit, Dad.
961
01:12:42,612 --> 01:12:45,949
- Are you still drunk?
- One thousand percent.
962
01:12:46,032 --> 01:12:47,617
Where do you even get alcohol?
963
01:12:47,701 --> 01:12:49,911
Besides here? I steal it.
964
01:12:50,994 --> 01:12:52,413
Why would you tell me that?
965
01:12:52,497 --> 01:12:55,500
'Cause you asked and I'm drunk,
so why would I lie?
966
01:12:55,582 --> 01:12:57,376
To make us feel better.
967
01:12:57,793 --> 01:12:59,336
That's all you care about.
968
01:12:59,421 --> 01:13:01,297
I've heard you call people
about "helping" me.
969
01:13:01,381 --> 01:13:04,175
We've called them in front of you.
We only care about you.
970
01:13:04,259 --> 01:13:06,386
Why do you think we're applying
to all these colleges?
971
01:13:06,469 --> 01:13:08,387
I don't want to go
to any fucking colleges.
972
01:13:08,470 --> 01:13:10,806
I don't give a fuck what you do
as long as you're alive.
973
01:13:10,890 --> 01:13:12,934
That is what's gonna make us feel better.
974
01:13:13,018 --> 01:13:15,520
Yeah? Well, I'm going to die
in a violent explosion full of blood.
975
01:13:15,603 --> 01:13:17,896
Probably all over you. Feel better?
976
01:13:26,823 --> 01:13:28,908
Fuck off.
977
01:16:24,458 --> 01:16:25,585
Tequila?
978
01:16:27,212 --> 01:16:29,756
What kind of tequila?
No. It's okay. I'm okay.
979
01:16:38,681 --> 01:16:40,934
Did you just send me
a beach house listing?
980
01:16:42,810 --> 01:16:43,811
Maybe.
981
01:16:44,561 --> 01:16:46,230
But we're never gonna be old.
982
01:16:47,649 --> 01:16:52,278
But we're already really... really old.
983
01:16:56,615 --> 01:16:57,867
I'm leaving tonight.
984
01:17:01,203 --> 01:17:02,956
I need my life to start.
985
01:17:04,164 --> 01:17:06,208
Even if it's just a few minutes long.
986
01:17:16,176 --> 01:17:17,761
I hope you live forever.
987
01:17:18,846 --> 01:17:20,305
Like an elf.
988
01:17:22,100 --> 01:17:23,476
Elves live forever?
989
01:17:24,728 --> 01:17:27,646
Unless they're murdered or die from grief.
990
01:17:28,230 --> 01:17:29,523
That's what Dylan said.
991
01:17:31,984 --> 01:17:33,235
He was a nerd.
992
01:17:35,654 --> 01:17:37,072
Yeah, he was all right.
993
01:17:41,118 --> 01:17:42,411
I'll see you inside?
994
01:17:56,384 --> 01:17:58,052
You'll always be my best friend.
995
01:19:09,832 --> 01:19:11,208
What the fuck is this?
996
01:19:12,042 --> 01:19:14,295
It's... It's grad.
997
01:19:14,378 --> 01:19:15,880
No. It's prom.
998
01:19:15,963 --> 01:19:17,090
It's both.
999
01:19:21,845 --> 01:19:24,014
That's fucking stupid.
1000
01:20:08,099 --> 01:20:09,184
Becky Burke.
1001
01:20:17,984 --> 01:20:20,320
I just wanna say I'm sorry
for killing everyone.
1002
01:20:20,403 --> 01:20:23,155
- Okay. Mara, just...
- No. It's cool, man.
1003
01:20:26,408 --> 01:20:28,411
I'm sorry I'm the curse.
1004
01:20:29,203 --> 01:20:30,996
I always have been. I did the math.
1005
01:20:31,081 --> 01:20:34,626
From Katelyn to Perry and the Daltons...
1006
01:20:36,336 --> 01:20:37,545
and Dylan...
1007
01:20:39,506 --> 01:20:41,716
I'm the reason why it happened.
1008
01:20:43,801 --> 01:20:45,177
And I don't know why.
1009
01:20:46,095 --> 01:20:47,596
I'm not a great person.
1010
01:20:50,225 --> 01:20:53,353
And I hate myself so much
for hurting everyone.
1011
01:20:56,480 --> 01:20:57,815
I'm so sorry.
1012
01:21:00,150 --> 01:21:03,654
I wish they were all here
to celebrate this dumb bullshit.
1013
01:21:03,738 --> 01:21:05,657
- Okay. Thank you, Mara.
- Hey.
1014
01:21:05,739 --> 01:21:06,824
Also...
1015
01:21:08,618 --> 01:21:11,037
Springsteen is really good.
1016
01:21:11,746 --> 01:21:13,748
I found that out the hard way.
1017
01:21:22,131 --> 01:21:23,298
Thank you, Mara.
1018
01:21:25,760 --> 01:21:27,177
Claire Hacklon.
1019
01:21:29,096 --> 01:21:30,472
It's all my fault.
1020
01:21:31,765 --> 01:21:33,183
I'm the curse.
1021
01:21:33,893 --> 01:21:36,980
I wasn't a good enough Christian
and now Jesus is punishing me.
1022
01:21:37,063 --> 01:21:39,149
Boo! Sit down, whore!
1023
01:21:42,277 --> 01:21:44,237
No, no! It's my fault!
1024
01:21:44,319 --> 01:21:46,072
I wanted to be top of the class
1025
01:21:46,155 --> 01:21:49,367
and I think I, like,
willed all my competition to die.
1026
01:21:49,451 --> 01:21:51,118
- I'm sorry.
- No. It's okay.
1027
01:21:51,202 --> 01:21:53,246
- I'm sorry.
- No. No, no, no.
1028
01:21:54,247 --> 01:21:56,166
It was me! It was definitely me!
1029
01:21:56,248 --> 01:21:58,251
I used to steal food from the cafeteria!
1030
01:23:16,121 --> 01:23:18,581
I love you too, you know.
1031
01:23:57,203 --> 01:24:01,416
Hi, Dylan's mom.
1032
01:24:02,292 --> 01:24:03,543
Hi, Mara.
1033
01:24:04,293 --> 01:24:05,502
Can I join you?
1034
01:24:30,444 --> 01:24:32,488
I'm sorry I didn't come to the funeral.
1035
01:24:34,490 --> 01:24:35,699
I understand.
1036
01:24:36,993 --> 01:24:38,536
It's a cool headstone, though.
1037
01:24:40,287 --> 01:24:41,455
He designed it.
1038
01:24:42,332 --> 01:24:43,416
Really?
1039
01:24:47,753 --> 01:24:50,215
The first time
Dylan and I ever really hung out...
1040
01:24:51,925 --> 01:24:53,677
I was super sick on shrooms...
1041
01:24:55,511 --> 01:24:57,096
and I saw so many of him.
1042
01:25:00,850 --> 01:25:02,394
And it was beautiful.
1043
01:25:07,981 --> 01:25:10,609
And now I can't even see one of him.
1044
01:25:16,323 --> 01:25:18,617
He told me he held your hair.
1045
01:25:19,993 --> 01:25:21,078
He told you that?
1046
01:25:23,372 --> 01:25:25,750
Did you think I was bad news bears?
1047
01:25:27,543 --> 01:25:28,586
No.
1048
01:25:30,380 --> 01:25:33,591
No, I just...
I thought you were in a lot of pain...
1049
01:25:34,926 --> 01:25:37,012
and didn't know how to deal with it.
1050
01:25:48,439 --> 01:25:50,983
I don't know what to do with my body.
1051
01:25:55,113 --> 01:25:57,282
It feels like I'm dying.
1052
01:26:04,956 --> 01:26:07,167
I'm so scared all the time.
1053
01:26:11,921 --> 01:26:14,923
Sometimes I wish I would just die
so it was over.
1054
01:26:22,349 --> 01:26:24,809
That's just what life
feels like sometimes.
1055
01:26:24,893 --> 01:26:26,935
Life fucking sucks.
1056
01:26:27,645 --> 01:26:29,022
It does.
1057
01:26:29,480 --> 01:26:30,814
It really does.
1058
01:26:33,109 --> 01:26:34,652
Why is this happening?
1059
01:26:40,574 --> 01:26:44,162
Did you hear about the man in Florida
with the sinkhole?
1060
01:26:46,122 --> 01:26:49,209
He was asleep in his bed
and a sinkhole opened.
1061
01:26:49,292 --> 01:26:51,544
His bed fell right down into it.
1062
01:26:52,252 --> 01:26:54,380
His brother heard him
shouting from the next room.
1063
01:26:54,463 --> 01:26:59,551
He ran over and found this giant pit
where the room used to be.
1064
01:27:00,636 --> 01:27:03,472
He could hear his brother
screaming for help,
1065
01:27:03,555 --> 01:27:06,433
but it was impossible to help him.
1066
01:27:07,851 --> 01:27:09,854
They never even got his body out.
1067
01:27:12,189 --> 01:27:13,817
Great.
1068
01:27:13,899 --> 01:27:16,568
Now I have to be afraid of sinkholes too.
1069
01:27:18,947 --> 01:27:20,573
It's just life.
1070
01:27:22,242 --> 01:27:24,284
I'm sure he didn't deserve it.
1071
01:27:26,328 --> 01:27:28,163
None of you deserve this.
1072
01:27:30,833 --> 01:27:33,502
But deserve's got nothing to do with it.
1073
01:27:36,213 --> 01:27:37,548
That's a good line.
1074
01:27:37,631 --> 01:27:40,467
I stole it from Clint Eastwood.
1075
01:27:49,226 --> 01:27:51,061
I think Dylan got it.
1076
01:27:53,480 --> 01:27:55,483
The answer, I mean.
1077
01:28:02,157 --> 01:28:03,408
God.
1078
01:28:04,743 --> 01:28:06,745
What am I supposed to do now?
1079
01:28:11,291 --> 01:28:13,126
Do you want to come over
for dinner next week?
1080
01:28:16,503 --> 01:28:18,340
Yeah, sure.
1081
01:28:19,966 --> 01:28:21,217
Thanks.
1082
01:28:28,725 --> 01:28:30,518
Are you okay?
1083
01:29:37,127 --> 01:29:38,336
I'm sorry.
1084
01:30:47,654 --> 01:30:50,824
After a few months,
there were no more explosions.
1085
01:31:02,462 --> 01:31:05,215
Everyone left and we were free to leave.
1086
01:31:06,507 --> 01:31:09,176
It was super anticlimactic.
1087
01:31:11,470 --> 01:31:14,306
The man was like,
"Hey, the Snooze Button works.
1088
01:31:14,390 --> 01:31:18,519
We just got that last batch wrong.
But we swear this new batch is legit."
1089
01:31:19,561 --> 01:31:22,439
I think they just want to sell me pills
for the rest of my life.
1090
01:31:47,215 --> 01:31:49,050
Are you sure this thing is safe?
1091
01:31:49,134 --> 01:31:50,969
I mean, compared to what?
1092
01:32:07,569 --> 01:32:10,321
Call us every hour. Or even more often.
1093
01:32:10,404 --> 01:32:11,905
Yeah. Call us a lot.
1094
01:32:12,573 --> 01:32:14,283
You know, I actually think I will.
1095
01:32:41,019 --> 01:32:44,481
They're going to tear down the school,
which makes sense.
1096
01:32:48,902 --> 01:32:52,572
They're also going to make a memorial
for the departed, which makes less sense,
1097
01:32:52,654 --> 01:32:55,324
because, let's be honest...
1098
01:32:56,451 --> 01:32:58,619
that sappy shit's gonna suck.
1099
01:33:00,537 --> 01:33:04,750
By the end of the school year,
31 students in the senior class died.
1100
01:33:14,886 --> 01:33:16,096
I didn't die.
1101
01:33:16,970 --> 01:33:18,931
I guess I'll never know why.
1102
01:33:29,317 --> 01:33:31,653
So, what did we learn?
1103
01:33:32,737 --> 01:33:34,197
What did we learn?
1104
01:33:35,407 --> 01:33:38,368
At the end of the day, it's all a...
1105
01:33:40,453 --> 01:33:41,871
Fuck this shit, man.
1106
01:33:41,954 --> 01:33:45,417
The world is a fucking cruel piece of shit
and nothing makes sense,
1107
01:33:45,500 --> 01:33:48,211
and the only thing you can do
is put your middle fingers up
1108
01:33:48,293 --> 01:33:50,337
and be all, like, fuck you, life!
1109
01:33:50,421 --> 01:33:52,089
Suck my dick!
1110
01:33:52,172 --> 01:33:54,550
I'm gonna be amazing
in spite of all life's shit.
1111
01:33:55,135 --> 01:33:58,346
I'm gonna travel the world,
I'm gonna get my bachelors of bullshit,
1112
01:33:58,430 --> 01:34:00,056
I'm gonna write some books
1113
01:34:00,140 --> 01:34:03,476
and make a low-to-minimum wage,
but do really well online.
1114
01:34:03,560 --> 01:34:05,395
I'll probably date some nice boys.
1115
01:34:05,478 --> 01:34:07,021
I'll probably marry a few of them.
1116
01:34:07,104 --> 01:34:10,065
And sometimes, late at night
when the world is quiet...
1117
01:34:10,984 --> 01:34:13,278
I'll tell them about Dylan
1118
01:34:13,360 --> 01:34:15,404
and what he meant to me,
1119
01:34:15,488 --> 01:34:17,657
and how I think about him every day.
1120
01:34:18,908 --> 01:34:22,620
I'll probably have a bunch of kids
and be a dope mom, and then...
1121
01:34:22,703 --> 01:34:25,247
No, you know what? Fuck it.
I'm gonna be president.
1122
01:34:25,331 --> 01:34:26,750
I, Mara Carlyle...
1123
01:34:26,832 --> 01:34:29,793
Trump's gonna look up at me
from his gold-crusted coffin and go,
1124
01:34:29,877 --> 01:34:31,962
"Who the fuck is this bitch?"
And I'll tell him...
1125
01:34:32,046 --> 01:34:34,882
That's President Bitch to you,
motherfucker.
1126
01:34:34,966 --> 01:34:38,636
The Big Bang happened
out of nowhere, for no reason.
1127
01:34:38,720 --> 01:34:42,015
Or maybe God set it all into motion.
Who knows?
1128
01:34:42,097 --> 01:34:44,516
But then, like, the dinosaurs died
1129
01:34:44,600 --> 01:34:47,936
because a meteor hit the Earth
at the exact worst spot imaginable.
1130
01:34:49,355 --> 01:34:50,731
Fuck, man.
1131
01:34:52,149 --> 01:34:54,652
And volcanoes erupt,
and drunk drivers drive,
1132
01:34:54,735 --> 01:34:58,907
and sinkholes collapse,
and sometimes people explode.
1133
01:35:00,074 --> 01:35:03,118
And I guess that just means
bad shit is gonna happen.
1134
01:35:03,203 --> 01:35:04,621
It's inevitable.
1135
01:35:05,204 --> 01:35:06,747
And so, here we are.
1136
01:35:06,831 --> 01:35:09,751
I'm gonna live the life
I want to have right now.
1137
01:35:09,833 --> 01:35:12,921
I'm not gonna waste time waiting for a day
that may never come for me.
1138
01:35:13,630 --> 01:35:14,838
So fuck it.
1139
01:35:14,922 --> 01:35:16,423
I'm gonna stay at the beach house
1140
01:35:16,507 --> 01:35:18,635
and smoke a hookah
with my toes in the sand.
1141
01:35:19,219 --> 01:35:22,346
I don't know what's gonna happen next.
I hope it's cool.
1142
01:35:22,430 --> 01:35:24,891
All I know is I could die any second now.
1143
01:35:24,974 --> 01:35:26,768
Hell, so could you.
1144
01:35:26,850 --> 01:35:29,938
Nothing's fair,
but it's a beautiful world,
1145
01:35:30,020 --> 01:35:32,523
and I'm happy I get to be here.
1146
01:35:33,608 --> 01:35:35,360
If only for a little while.
1147
01:35:38,070 --> 01:35:39,780
The fuck else can you do?
1148
01:35:41,372 --> 01:35:46,372
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