Original subtitles

>> Steve: FROM ROCKEFELLER

CENTER, IN THE HEART OF

NEW YORK CITY, IT'S "THE

TONIGHT SHOW" STARRING JIMMY

FALLON

TONIGHT JOIN JIMMY AND HIS

GUESTS -

MICHAEL CHE AND COLIN JOST

KAITLYN DEVER.

MUSICAL GUEST BTS AND FEATURING

THE LEGENDARY ROOTS CREW

AND NOW HERE'S YOUR HOST,

JIMMY FALLON

♪

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

>> Jimmy: OH, MY GOODNESS.

HELLO, EVERYONE.

THANK YOU FOR SO MUCH FOR

TUNING IN.

WELCOME TO "THE TONIGHT SHOW,"

EVERYBODY.

LET'S GET TO THE NEWS AND

JOKES.

WELL GUYS, AFTER TWO DAYS OF

CONTROVERSY TODAY PRESIDENT

TRUMP FINALLY DID THE RIGHT

THING AND FORCEFULLY REJECTED

WHITE SUPREMACY.

TAKE A LOOK.

[ TONE ]

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Jimmy: I'M KIDDING.

HE HASN'T DONE THAT AT ALL

AND AS A RESULT, REPUBLICANS

ARE DISTANCING THEMSELVES FROM

THE PRESIDENT.

>>> THE PRESIDENT'S DEBATE

PERFORMANCE HAS SPARKED

A TORRENT OF CRITICISM THAT

EVEN HIS MOST ARDENT ALLIES

HAVE STRUGGLED TO CONTAIN.

AND REPUBLICANS ON CAPITAL ARE

HILL ARE NOW DISTANCING

THEMSELVES FROM THE PRESIDENT

AFTER HE FAIL TO DISAVOW A

A FAR-RIGHT FASCIST GROUP.

>> Jimmy: IT'S BEEN SIX MONTH

OF A PANDEMIC AND NOW THE

REPUBLICANS ARE DISTANCING

YUP, THEY'RE REALLY TRYING TO

DISTANCE THEMSELVES FROM

TRUMP'S WHITE SUPREMACY ISSUE.

IN FACT, TODAY MITCH McCONNELL

BROUGHT A BILL TO THE FLOOR TO

BRING BACK THE SOURCE AWARDS

[ LAUGHTER ]

YEAH, REPUBLICANS SAID THIS AS

THE LAST STRAW

THEN TOMORROW THEY'LL BE LIKE

"OH, WE FOUND A BUNCH MORE

STRAWS."

TURNS OUT ALL OF THE

CONTROVERSIES ARE CAUSING THE

PRESIDENT'S BIGGEST SUPPORTERS

TO EXPERIENCE TRUMP FATIGUE.

I THINK IT MIGHT BE TRUE

TODAY WHEN TRUMP CALLED INTO

FOX AND FRIENDS, STEVE DOOCY

WAS LIKE, "UGH, JUST LET THE

MACHINE GET IT."

[ LAUGHTER ]

"WE WILL EVER TALK FOR

45 MINUTES IT JUST SAID -- WHAT

DID SAY?

[ INDISCERNIBLE

HOW DO YOU GET AWAY FROM TRUMP

THOUGH

IT'S LIKE DEALING WITH A BEAR.

DO YOU RUN

DO YOU ACT BIG

DO YOU PLAY DEAD

NO ONE KNOWS

[ LAUGHTER ]

THAT'S RIGHT

REPUBLICANS ARE FINALLY

STEPPING UP TO SAY IT'S NOT

OKAY TO PUBLICLY SUPPORT WHITE

SUPREMACY MORE THAN SEVEN OR

EIGHT TIMES, TOPS.

EIGHT IS -- EIGHT IS ENOUGH.

[ LAUGHTER ]

WELL EARLIER TODAY,

JOHN ROBERTS FROM FOX NEWS TRY

TO GIVE THE WHITE HOUSE

A CHANCE TO CLEAR THINGS UP AND

DENOUNCE WHITE SUPREMACY, BUT

PRESS SECRETARY

KAYLEIGH McENANY HAD A TOUGH

TIME WITH THAT

WATCH THIS

MORNING, CAN YOU, NAMING IT,

MAKE A DECLARE AND SAY THAT

THAT YOU -- THAT THE PRESIDENT

DENOUNCES IT

>> I JUST DID.

THE PRESIDENT HAS DENOUNCED

THIS REPEATEDLY.

THE PRESIDENT WAS ASKED IT

YOU'RE MAKING -- YOU'RE

CONTRIVING A STORY

>> NO I'M NOT.

>> Jimmy: YEAH, TRUMP'S LIKE

SOME SORT OF MYTHICAL TROLL.

YOU GOT TO ASK THE SAME

QUESTION THREE TIMES BEFORE YOU

GET THE ANSWER YOU'RE LOOKING

FOR.

"THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY TO REVEAL

THE ANSWER, SAY THE QUESTION,

BUT IN REVERSE."

[ LAUGHTER ]

THE ONLY WAY THEIR GONNA

CONDEMN WHITE SUPREMACY IS IF

YOU SNEAK IT INTO TRUMP'S

TELEPROMPTER THE WAY YOU SNEAK

MEDICINE INTO A DOG'S FOOD

"AND THEN WE'RE GONNA -- I DO

NOT SUPPORT WHITE SUPREMACISTS

BRING BACK FOOTBALL.

[ LAUGHTER ]

AFTER THAT EXCHANGE, ROBERTS

DIDN'T HOLD BACK HOW HE WAS

FEELING.

THIS IS REAL

TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.

>> FOR ALL OF YOU ON TWITTER

WHO ARE HAMMERING ME FOR

ANSWERING THAT --- FOR ASKING

THAT QUESTION, I DON'T CARE

BECAUSE IT'S A QUESTION THAT

NEEDS TO BE ASKED AND CLEARLY

THE PRESIDENT'S REPUBLICAN

COLLEAGUES A MILE AWAY FROM

HERE ARE LOOKING FOR AN ANSWER

FOR IT, TOO.

SO, STOP DEFLECTING.

>> OKAY --

>> STOP BLAMING THE MEDIA.

I'M TIRED OF IT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ APPLAUSE ]

>> Jimmy: EVEN FOX NEWS IS FED

UP WITH TRUMP.

THAT'S LIKE HDTV TELLING THE

PROPERTY BROTHERS TO TAKE THEIR

TIGHT JEANS AND NEAR BEARDS AND

BEAT IT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Tariq: NEAR BEARDS.

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Jimmy: I HOPE THAT BECOMES

A THING, MAN

AFTER MONDAY'S TAX BOMBSHELL,

TUESDAY'S DEBATE DEBACLE AND

WEDNESDAY'S WHITE SUPREMACY

DISASTER, TRUMP SEEMED PRETTY

DOWN AT LAST NIGHT'S RALLY

♪

♪ YOUNG MAN

THERE'S NO NEED TO FEEL DOWN

STAY AT THE YMCA ♪

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Jimmy: THAT'S ACTUAL AUDIO.

THAT'S REAL -- YEAH.

YES, OF COURSE

THE CLASSIC "YMCA" DANCE

CLAPPING, POINTING, AND DRAWING

A CIRCLE WITH YOU FINGER

[ LAUGHTER ]

ONE, TWO, THREE.

IT'S FUN TO STAY -

♪ YMC

YMCA

THEY GOT EVERYTHING ♪

♪ MAKING BOYS TO ME

EVERYTHING THA

A MAN COULD BE ♪

♪

>> Jimmy: OPPONENTS FORCEFULLY

REJECTED TRUMP

TRUMP IS IN SO MUCH DEBT PRETTY

SOON HE WILL BE STAYING AT THE

YMCA

AFTER THAT IT'S CLEAR IF THE

PRESIDENCY DOESN'T WORK OUT,

NEITHER ABOUT DANCING WITH THE

STARS.

THE CROWD WAS HAVING FUN

LET'S MAKE IT A DANCE HOP.

♪

TALKING ABOUT THE DEBATES

EXCEPT FOR RUDY GIULIANI WHO IS

TALKING ABOUT THE DE-BAT

RUDY MIGHT BE RIGHT.

I DON'T THINK YOU CAN LEGALLY

CALL WHAT HAPPENED A DEBATE.

NOT SURE WHERE RUDY WAS GOING

WITH THIS.

EITHER HE HAS SOMETHING TO SAY

ABOUT THE DEBATE OR HE IS

LOOKING FOR A D-BATTERY.

WE ARE STILL ON THE AIR.

GIULIANI QUICKLY NOTICED AND

FOLLOWED UP WITH A OOPS, MY

BAT.

AFRAID OF THE LAST LETTER.

THE GUY IS DOING TRUMP'S DEBATE

AND CAN'T SPELL DEBATE

LIKE GETTING A TEXT FROM YOUR

SURGEON SAYING I CAN'T WAIT FOR

YOUR SURGERY

>>> THERE HAS BEEN CLARK OVER

HOW TO HANDLE CRUISE LINES

>> THE CDC IS EXTENDING ITS BAN

ON U.S. PORTS THROUGH THE END

OF THE MONTH

THE CDC DIRECTOR WANTED TO

EXTEND IT THROUGH THE END OF

FEBRUARY, BUT VICE PRESIDENT

PENCE OVERRULED HIM.

EVEN THE CRUISE SHIPS KNOW IT'S

A BAD IDEA

IF IT'S A SIX-DAY TRIP THEY

TELL YOU TO PACK FOR NINE

MONTHS

THIS MIGHT EXPLAIN THE NEW AD.

>> ARE YOU READY TO GET OUT OF

YOUR APARTMENT, TIRED OF YOUR

SAME OLD PANDEMIC ROUTINE?

JOIN US FOR A CARNIVAL CRUISE.

>> WHAT?

>> DIVE INTO A POOL OF KIDS

SWIMMING WITH DIAPERS.

SHARE A MIKE AT A KARAOKE

LOUNGE

>> IS THIS A TRAP?

>> CARNIVAL CRUISE, JUST A FEW

MONTHS AWAY FROM SETTING SAIL.

>>> IRELAND SUPREME COURTS SAYS

THAT THE BREAD SERVED AT

RESTAURANTS CAN'T LEGALLY BE

CALLED BREADTH -- BREAD.

SUBWAY ADDS SUGAR TO ITS BREAD

>> Jimmy: AFTER THE RULING,

SUBWAY SAID AT LEAST THEY

DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT THE

MEAT

AND THEY SAID BY THE WAY, STOP

CALLING MY GUY WHO MAKES

SANDWICHES AN ARTIST

WHAT IS GOING ON WITH IRELAND

THAT THAT MADE IT TO THE

HIGHEST COURT?

IRELAND IS ARGUING OVER

SANDWICHES

CAN WE LIVE THERE.

NEXT ON THE DOCKET IS ARE TACO

BELL'S TACOS ACTUALLY TACOS?

THAT'S MY IRISH RESTAURANT

CAN YOU DO THE IRISH

RESTAURANT

DO IT.

>> TACO BELLS AREN'T TACOS

>> Jimmy: IT'S NOT IRISH

I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU SOUND

LIKE

DO IT BUT RUN OUT OF BREATH.

>> Jimmy: I'M NOT A DIAL UP

COACH.

I APOLOGIZE.

>> YOUR IRISH ACCENT FINDS

SOUNDS MORE JAMAICAN

>> Jimmy: IS THAT REAL JERK

CHICKEN THERE?

>> I LOVE IT

>> Jimmy: I SAW THAT A COMPANY

IN THE UK IS WORKING ON A WAY

TO SPEED UP PARAMEDICS RESPONSE

TIME

>> THE PARAMEDIC WITH THE

MEDICAL KIT COULD QUICKLY

RESPOND.

THE SUIT HAS TWO ENGINES ON

EACH ARM AND ONE ON THE BACK

>> Jimmy: RIGHT NOW THAT GUY IS

CURRENTLY COVERING OVER 50

CARNIVAL CRUISE TRIPS.

IT'S QUICK

ALL PARAMEDICS HAVE TO DO IS

GET IN THE SUIT, PUT ON THE

GLOVES AND JET PACK, AND SLOWLY

FLY OVER

THERE IS A SECOND PARAMEDIC

TRAVELING BEHIND FOR WHEN FIRST

ONE CRASHES.

WE KNOW JET PACKS NEVER FAIL

>> Jimmy: POLICE IN LOUISIANA

ARRESTED A MAN AFTER HE WENT

SWIMMING IN THE ASQUARIUM AT A

A BASS PRO SHOP.

EMPLOYEES SAID THEY WOULD HAVE

GOTTEN HIM OUT IF ONLY THERE

WAS FISHING GEAR NEARBY.

>> JIMMY, JIMMY, JIMMY

A GUY SWIMMING IN A BASS PRO

SHOP AQUARIUM, AND THAT'S THE

BEST YOU GOT

>> Jimmy: WHAT, YOU THINK YOU

CAN DO BETTER?

>> DAMNED RIGHT.

>> Jimmy: COLIN JOST, TOO?

>> WELL, YOU KNOW WHAT THIS

MEANS.

IT'S TIME FOR A GOOD

OLD-FASHIONED TONIGHT SHOW

JOKEOFF!

>> I THINK WE ALL KNOW THE

RULES.

ONE MORE TIME.

POLICE IN LOUISIANA ARRESTED A

A MAN AFTER HE WENT SWIMMING IN

THE AQUARIUM AT A BASS PRO

SHOP

GO

>> WEIRDLY, HE WAS CHARGED WITH

BEING TOO SOBER FOR A GUY AT A

A BASS PRO SHOP.

>> EVEN WORSE, HE WORE HIS

FACEMASK AS A BANANA HAMMOCK

>> THE GUY WASN'T IN JAIL VERY

LONG

IT WAS MORE OF A CATCH AND

RELEASE.

>> MOVE OVER

BASS PRO SHOP AQUARIUM IS NOW

THE SADDEST PIXAR FILM

>> MEANWHILE SEAWORLD WAS LIKE

FOR 50 BUCKS YOU CAN DO

WHATEVER

>> THEY WERE ABLE TO CATCH HIM

BY BAITING THE HOOK WITH A

A LITTLE MORE CRAP

>> Jimmy: TIME FOR ROUND TWO

HERE'S THE NEXT STORY.

A 94-YEAR-OLD VIRGINIA MAN

RECEIVED PERMISSION FROM

WRIGLEY'S TO BE BURIED IN

A CASKET SHAPED LIKE A GIANT

PACK OF JUICY FRUIT.

GO

>> THE MAN PLANS TO BE BURIED

ON THE UNDERSIDE OF A MIDDLE

SCHOOL DESK.

>> PERMISSION, WHAT ARE THEY

GOING TO DO, KILL HIM?

>> Jimmy: AT FIRST THE MAN'S

FAMILY LOVED THE IDEA, BUT THEN

QUICKLY REALIZED IT WAS

TASTELESS.

>> RIGHT NOW THERE'S A

A CARPENTER TAKING MEASUREMENTS

WITH A ROLL OF BUBBLE TAPE

>> SO IN 1,000 YEARS,

ARCHAEOLOGISTS WILL STILL

WONDER WHAT THE HELL THE FRUIT

FLAVOR IS SUPPOSED TO BE

>> Jimmy: AND HERE TO READ THE

EULOGY OFF A GIANT WRAPPER IS

BAZOOKA JOE!

[ BELL RINGS ]

>> Jimmy: ALL RIGHT, FINAL

ROUND.

HERE'S THE LAST STORY.

AFTER 43 YEARS, CHUCK E. CHEESE

ANNOUNCED THEY'VE FILED FOR

CHAPTER 11 BANKRUPTCY.

GO

>> YOU CAME IN HOT, MAN WITH

THE BEEPS.

>> SO --

>> Jimmy: IT DOESN'T SAY SO.

>> BEEP.

SO THERE MIGHT BE SOME FLAWS IN

THE BUSINESS MODEL OF

A BUSINESS THAT SELLS RATS TO

CHILDREN

>> Jimmy: OKAY, BUT BEFORE YOU

CLOSE, I THINK MY KID IS STILL

IN YOUR BALL PIT SOMEWHERE

>> WHICH I THINK MEANS THAT IN

2024 CHUCK E. CHEESE WILL BE

PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES

>> Jimmy: THAT WAS JOKEOFF,

GIVE IT UP FOR COLIN JOST AND

MICHAEL CHE!

STICK AROUND, MORE TONIGHT SHOW

AFTER THE BREAK.

>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK,

EVERYBODY.

BTS HAS BEEN ON THE SHOW ALL

WEEK

AND WE ARE GLAD TO HAVE THEM

AND WE ARE GLAD TO HAVE THEM

TONIGHT I'LL BE FACING OFF

AGAINST BTS IN A GAME OF ZOOM

OLYMPICS, AND WE'VE GOT ANOTHER

EXCLUSIVE MUSIC PERFORMANCE TO

CLOSE OUT THE SHOW

IT'S GOING TO BE GOOD!

>>> THE GROUNDHOG CHALLENGE.

>> GO!

[ LAUGHTER ]

[ BELL ]

>> GO!

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> GO!

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Jimmy: STOP

MY GOD

>> Announcer: RM VERSUS V.

>> GO!

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Announcer: RM WINS.

ROUND TWO.

TV REMOTE BALANCE.

WHOEVER BALANCES THE MOST TV

REMOTES IN ONE HAND WINS

>> GO!

>> Jimmy: HERE WE GO

13 SECONDS

10 SECONDS

MY GOSH!

HURRY UP

>> YOU ARE SUCH A CHEATER.

>> Announcer: RM VERSUS GIN.

>> GO!

>> HERE WE GO.

KEEP GOING

YOU HAVE FOUR SECONDS, THREE

SECONDS, TWO, ONE SECOND, GO

>> Jimmy: RM IS THE WINNER

>> Announcer: RM WINS.

FINAL ROUND GUITAR PICK

CHALLENGE.

EACH PLAYER TAKES AN ACOUSTIC

GUITAR WITH A HANDFUL OF PICKS

INSIDE

WHOEVER SHAKES OUT THE MOST

WINS

>> GO!

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Jimmy: THIS IS GREAT, MAN

HURRY UP

LET'S COUNT UP HOW MUCH EACH

PLAYER GOT

>> ONE, TWO, THREE, FOUR -- 49

>> 47!

>> Jimmy: THE WINNER BY TWO

PICKS.

AND THE WINNER IS.

>> Jimmy: MY THANKS.

STICK AROUND

WE HAVE MORE

COME ON BACK

>> Jimmy: MY FIRST GUESTS ARE

THE CO-ANCHORS OF WEEKEND

UPDATE ON "SATURDAY NIGHT

LIVE," WHICH RETURNS THIS

SATURDAY, WITH HOST CHRIS ROCK

AND MUSICAL GUEST MEGAN THEE

STALLION

LET ME INTRODUCE, PLEASE,

MICHAEL CHE.

>> YEAH.

>> Jimmy: HE'S ALSO A "NEW YORK

TIMES" BEST-SELLING AUTHOR

PLEASE WELCOME COLIN JOST,

EVERYBODY!

♪ MICHAEL CHE AND COLIN JOST ♪

♪ SIT ON DOWN AND TALK TO THE

HOST ♪

♪ GO THE DISTANCE, YOU WILL

SIT ♪

>> Jimmy: AH, THANK YOU FOR

BEING HERE

THIS IS FANTASTIC.

>> THANKS FOR HAVING US, MAN

>> YEAH, COOL.

>> Jimmy: THANK YOU FOR BEING

OUR FIRST TWO-PERSON IN-STUDIO

GUEST, YOU KNOW?

I'M SORRY.

COLIN, I'M SORRY

YOU, I, DO YOU, DO YOU FEEL FAR

AWAY

>> I DON'T FEEL FAR AWAY

I AM FARTHER AWAY.

I'M A LOT FARTHER AWAY

>> Jimmy: YEAH, THIS IS

PROTOCOL AND ALL THAT STUFF,

SO, CAN YOU --

>> I CAN'T HEAR ANYTHING YOU

SAY.

>> Jimmy: THANK YOU FOR COMING

ON THE SHOW, APPRECIATE IT

>> ANY TIME, MAN

>> NEW NORMAL!

>> Jimmy: THIS IS THE NEW 30

ROCK

I SAW YOU AT THE TESTS, WHEN WE

WERE DOING THE NOSE SWABS.

HOW'S IT LIKE WORKING SIX FEET

APART FROM EVERYBODY

>> I LOVE IT, I OWE A LOT OF

PEOPLE, NOBODY CAN GET IT FROM

ME

>> Jimmy: JUST ENOUGH APART.

>> IT'S PERFECT.

>> Jimmy: ARE THEY MAKING

CHANGES TO 8H?

WHAT'S HAPPENING

>> HAVEN'T REALLY BEEN IN YET

AND SEEN WHAT IT IS, RIGHT

WE HAD A TABLE READ.

>> Jimmy: WHAT WAS THAT LIKE

>> WELL, WE HAVE 20 CAST

MEMBERS IN OUR SHOW RIGHT NOW,

AND THEY HAVE TO BE SIX FEET

APART.

SO 20 TIMES SIX IS LIKE

A THOUSAND

AND YOU'RE HEARING VOICES AND

YOU'RE LIKE, "WHO SAID THAT"

IT'S A GREAT TIME FOR CREW TO

YELL STUFF, BECAUSE PEOPLE ARE

LIKE, I GUESS THEY'RE IN THE

CAST

IT'S FINE.

>> IT'S LIKE LISTENING TO

A PODCAST.

YOU DON'T SEE ANYBODY.

IT'S GREAT

IT'S KIND OF COOL.

>> Jimmy: WHAT WILL THE

AUDIENCE LOOK LIKE

>> WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING

ABOUT OVER THERE

>> Jimmy: WE'RE TALKING ABOUT

"SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE"!

COMING BACK THIS WEEKEND

WHAT IS THE AUDIENCE GOING TO

BE LIKE?

>> WHITE

>> Jimmy: NO, NO

>> TO START WITH, THEY'RE ALL

WHITE.

>> Jimmy: NO, NO, NO, NO

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Jimmy: EVERYBODY ENJOYS THAT

SHOW, BUT IS IT GOING TO CHANGE

THE STYLE FOR "UPDATE"

>> IT'S A MAXIMUM CAPACITY OF

ONE AT THE DESK.

>> Jimmy: CONGRATULATIONS,

JOST

>> AS LONG AS I GET PAID, IT'S

FUN.

I THINK IT'S ACTUALLY MORE FUN

RULES MAKE COMEDY FUN.

WHEN THERE'S THINGS YOU CAN'T

DO, WHEN THERE'S KIND OF

LOOPHOLES, THAT'S WHEN YOU

START TO GET REALLY CREATIVE,

AND I THINK THE SHOW IS THE

PERFECT PLACE FOR THAT

>> THAT WAS LIKE THE POLITICAL

ANSWER

>> Jimmy: NO, I AGREE WITH YOU

I LOVE RULES

>> I LOVE RULES.

>> Jimmy: YEAH, BECAUSE I LIKE

TO BREAK THEM.

TELL ME WHAT TO DO, I'LL FIND

A WAY AROUND IT.

YOU HAVE THE FIRST SHOW FOR THE

TIME BACK, AND THE GUEST IS

CHRIS ROCK

YOU HAD TO GO TO HIS HOUSE TO

CONVINCE HIM

>> YEAH, WE LITERALLY WILL TO

GO TO CHRIS ROCK'S HOUSE TO

CONVINCE HIM TO DO SNL

IT SEEMS LIKE THE SCENE IN THE

GODFATHER, YOU KNOW WHEN TOM

HAGEN GOES, I NEVER SAW THE

GODFATHER, BUT SOMEONE TOLD ME

IT WAS SIMILAR

I MIGHT HAVE GOT BAD

INFORMATION, JIMMY

>> Jimmy: TOM HAGEN.

>> LITERALLY, YOU'VE GOT TO DO

IT, MAN.

IT'S 30 ROCK, YOU GOT TO COME

HOME AND MAKE PEOPLE, YOU KNOW,

FEEL GOOD AGAIN.

>> Jimmy: THE COUNTRY NEEDS IT

I WILL BE WATCHING IT.

I CANNOT WAIT.

MORE WITH COLIN JOST AND

MICHAEL CHE WHEN WE COME BACK.

♪ I SAID OOH, YEAH ♪

>> Jimmy: WELCOME BACK,

EVERYBODY.

I AM HERE IN STUDIO WITH

MICHAEL CHE AND COLIN JOST

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

I SAY WE'RE BACK, WE'RE HERE

WITH -- WE'LL GET YOU --

>> I THOUGHT WE WERE GOING TO

SWITCH SEATS DURING THE

COMMERCIAL

>> I THOUGHT IT WOULDN'T BE

GOOD

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Jimmy: HE MADE THE DECISION

A LOT OF THINGS HAVE HAPPENED

SINCE -- FIRST OF ALL, THANKS

AGAIN FOR COMING IN.

COLIN, REALLY, THANK YOU

SINCE YOU GUYS HAVE HELPED ME

OUT WITH THE SHOWS IN

QUARANTINE, YOU ZOOMED IN, I

APPRECIATE YOU DOING THAT.

SINCE YOU'VE BEEN ON, COLIN,

YOUR BOOK WENT TO "THE NEW YORK

TIMES" BESTSELLER LIST

CONGRATS

>> THANK YOU

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

♪

HE IS A "NEW YORK TIMES"

BEST-SELLING AUTHOR.

DON'T YOU EVER FORGET IT

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> BIG DEAL.

>> Jimmy: HOW'S THE HOUSE?

BECAUSE WE WERE TALKING ABOUT

YOU BOUGHT A HOUSE LAST TIME

>> I DID BUY A HOUSE

>> AH-HA

>> IT'S NOT A COMPETITION.

I MEAN

>> I HAVEN'T MOVED IN YET,

BECAUSE APPARENTLY, IT TAKES A

A LONG TIME TO CLOSE

I DIDN'T KNOW THIS

USUALLY, WHERE I GO TO LIVE,

IT'S AN APARTMENT, AND YOU GIVE

THE MONEY.

AND THEN THEY GIVE YOU A KEY

END OF TRANSACTION

NOW WITH A HOUSE YOU HAVE TO

LIKE WAIT, THEY HAVE TO MAKE

SURE THAT EVERYTHING'S UP TO

CODE

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT ANY CODES

I'VE GOT TO GET A LAWYER

THEY HAVE TO TAKE DOWN A SHED.

IT'S ANNOYING.

IT'S A MESS.

>> Jimmy: THE SHED WASN'T UP TO

CODE

>> THE SHED WASN'T UP TO CODE.

THEY TOOK IT DOWN.

I'M JUST GOING TO PUT IT BACK

UP AS SOON AS THEY LEAVE

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> I CANNOT BELIEVE THAT THERE

IS A CODE FOR SHEDS.

>> THERE'S A CODE FOR SHEDS.

>> I HAVE NEVER SEEN A SHED AND

THOUGHT "THAT LOOKS UP TO

CODE."

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> IT'S AN OUTSIDE CLOSET, MAN

GIVE THE SHED A BREAK.

>> Jimmy: I'M SO HAPPY THAT

CHRIS IS THERE, CHRIS ROCK

HOSTING.

DO YOU HAVE CHRIS ROCK STORIES

>> I REMEMBER BEING BACKSTAGE

AT THE --AT THE -- WHEN THEY

DID THE BENEFIT AFTER HURRICANE

SANDY, THEY DID IT AT MADISON

SQUARE GARDEN, I WAS THERE WITH

BOBBY MOYNIHAN, WE WERE GOING

TO DO A BIT WHERE HE WAS DRUNK

UNCLE.

SO WE'RE WAITING BACKSTAGE

IT'S ALL HUGE MUSICAL ACTS,

RIGHT?

THE WHO, ROLLING STONES.

WE'RE WAITING TO GO ON, AND

CHRIS ROCK WANDERS OVER AND

HE'S LIKE, HEY, GUYS, HOW'S IT

GOING?

WE'RE LIKE, GOOD

HE GOES, THE WHO'S ON NOW, AND

THEN ROLLING STONES ARE GOING

TO GO ON, AND THEN BETWEEN

THAT, THEY'RE GOING TO SEND YOU

GUYS OUT THERE

[ LAUGHTER ]

-- TO DO A COMEDY BIT.

IS THAT WHAT'S HAPPENING

AND SUDDENLY, WE'RE LIKE, YEAH

[ LAUGHTER ]

YEAH, THAT'S WHAT'S HAPPENING.

HE'S LIKE, HEY, BEST OF LUCK

[ LAUGHTER ]

HE GOES, I'LL TELL YOU

SOMETHING, I'LL BE WATCHING.

[ LAUGHTER ]

>> Jimmy: I'M DEFINITELY NOT

GOING OUT THERE.

> MY STORY'S NOT AS GOOD

>> YOUR STORY'S GREAT.

>> IT'S A SILLY STORY BUT ONE

TIME I WAS DOING "TOP FIVE."

HE HAD A MOVIE "TOP FIVE."

AND I GOT TO MEET

ROSARIO DAWSON FOR THE FIRST

TIME, AND I WAS SMITTEN.

AND I REMEMBER HER TALKING TO

ME, SHE WAS SO NICE TO ME, AND

SHE WAS LIKE, YOU LOOK SO

FAMILIAR, DO I KNOW YOU FROM

SOMEWHERE?

AND I WAS LIKE, I DON'T THINK

SO

AND SHE WAS LIKE, ARE YOU SURE

HAVE WE NEVER MET?

AND I WAS LIKE, I DON'T THINK

WE'VE EVER MET

AND I JUST HEAR CHRIS ROCK ON

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE HALL

GOING "YOU'RE NOT SURE IF

YOU'VE MET ROSARIO DAWSON?

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND I WAS LIKE, I KNOW I'VE

NEVER MET HER.

HAVE YOU MET BEYONCE

[ LAUGHTER ]

HOW DO YOU NOT KNOW IF YOU'VE

MET ROSARIO DAWSON

>> Jimmy: HE IS UNBELIEVABLE

I LOVED HIM SO MUCH.

AND THEN JIM CARREY IS GOING

TOO, MAYBE

>> YEAH.

YOU TALKED TO HIM PERSONALLY

>> IT SEEMS LIKE IT'S POSSIBLE

THERE WAS A DEBATE

>> Jimmy: THERE WAS A DEBATE

OH MY GOD.

>> SEEMS LIKE IT GOT PRETTY

GOOD REVIEWS

>> Jimmy: COLIN DID NOT GET

GOOD REVIEWS AT ALL.

>> I HAVEN'T READ ALL THE

REVIEWS YET BUT SOME OF THE

ONES I SAW WERE --

>> Jimmy: JIM CARREY PLAYING

JOE BIDEN.

>> YES

>> Jimmy: THAT WOULD BE

AMAZING.

MAYA RUDOLPH DOING

KAMALA HARRIS.

IT'S ALL A POSSIBILITY

YOU DON'T WANT TO SAY ANYTHING

YOU CAN'T SPOIL IT

>> NEVER KNOW.

>> Jimmy: THAT WOULDN'T BE FUN

>> WE CAN'T SPOIL WHO WINS

[ LAUGHTER ]

CAN'T SPOIL IT

>> COULD BE CARREY, COULD BE

SINBAD

>> Jimmy: SINBAD

SINBAD'S NOT PLAYING JOE BIDEN

>> I DON'T KNOW!

I'VE HEARD THINGS.

I HEARD SOME THINGS.

PEOPLE BEEN TALKIN'.

>> Jimmy: IT'S GOING TO BE

AWESOME.

IT IS SATURDAY NIGHT

IT IS LIVE

IT IS ON NBC

BEST OF LUCK, BREAK A LEG.

I KNOW YOU GUYS ARE BRILLIANT

AND YOU'VE GOT TO GO UP AND

WRITE SOME FUNNY STUFF

SO THANKS SO MUCH FOR TAKING

TIME, COMING HERE AND THANKS

FOR BEING LIVE ON BEHALF OF

EVERYONE, DOING THAT FOR US.

MICHAEL CHE, COLIN JOST.

"SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE" RETURNS

THIS SATURDAY, THAT'S RIGHT.

ON NBC WITH HOST CHRIS ROCK AND

MUSICAL GUEST

MEGAN THEE STALLION.

WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH

KAITLYN DEVER.

STICK AROUND, EVERYBODY.

♪

>> Jimmy: MY NEXT GUEST IS A

A TALENTED ACTRESS WHO CAN YOU

SEE IN THE MOVIE "COASTAL

ELITES" WHICH OUT NOW ON HBO

AND HBO MAX.

SHE'S ALSO IN THE NEW SERIES

"MONSTER LAND", WHICH PREMIERES

TOMORROW ON HULU

HERE IS KAITLYN DEVER.

HI, CAITLYN!

>> HELLO, JIMMY!

>> Jimmy: NICE TO MEET YOU OVER

ZOOM

>> I KNOW.

IT'S SO NICE TO MEET YOU

THIS IS SO COOL, THIS IS SO

COOL FOR ME.

I'VE BEEN A HUGE FAN OF YOURS

FOR A LONG TIME.

SO, THIS IS INSANE

>> Jimmy: THIS IS RAD, I'M A

A FAN OF YOURS AS WELL

I KNOW YOU'RE BUSY PREPPING FOR

THE FILM VERSION OF "DEAR EVAN

HANSON."

>> I CAN'T EVEN YELL YOU,

JIMMY, I LTERALLY CANNOT

DESCRIBE TO YOU HOW EXCITED I

AM

I THINK I'VE ONLY HAD THREE

MUSICAL AUDITIONS IN MY WHOLE

LIFE, AND "EVAN HANSON" WAS ONE

OF THEM.

SO, IT FEELS INSANE THAT I'M

GOING TO BE A PART OF THAT

I'VE ALWAYS WANTED TO DO A

A MUSICAL.

>> Jimmy: HOW DID THE OTHER TWO

AUDITIONS GO

NOT SO GOOD?

>> WELL, NOT SO GOOD, BUT THEY

WERE OKAY.

>> Jimmy: I HAD THE WORST

AUDITION EVER IN THE HISTORY OF

THE BUSINESS

I AUDITIONED TO BE ON BROADWAY

TO BE FRANKENSTEIN

>> ON BROADWAY

>> Jimmy: DUDE, IT WAS, I'LL

NEVER FORGET IT, I'M HONESTLY

GETTING, I'M ABOUT TO VOMIT

RIGHT NOW.

BECAUSE I REMEMBER GOING TO AN

APARTMENT -- I'M NOT GOING TO

SAY WHO WAS WHO WAS CASTING ME,

BUT THE PIANO PLAYER WAS THERE,

AND I GO, I'M JUST GOING TO

SING "PUTTIN' ON THE RITZ.

I GO, "YEAH I CAN DO IT.

IF UO'RE BLUE AND YOU --."

I GO, "GOT IT.

I GET THERE AND THEY GO, "YEAH,

WE DON'T WANT TO HEAR THAT

SONG, WE WANT TO HEAR THIS NEW

SONG."

AND I GO "OH, HERE'S WHERE I

GET BUSTED

BECAUSE I'M NOT A REAL ACTOR OR

A SINGER."

AND IT WAS SO BAD.

EVERYONE FELT SO BAD IN THE

ROOM

IT WAS AWFUL

AND I REMEMBER, I WAS SO

EMBARRASSED WHEN I WENT HOME

AND IT WAS COLD, IT WAS

DECEMBER, AND THERE WAS STEAM

COMING OFF OF MY BODY.

THAT'S HOW EMBARRASSED I WAS

IT'S LIKE A BLOCK OF -

>> MY OTHER, MY OTHER MUSICAL

AUDITION, THAT'S EXACTLY THE

SAME THING THAT HAPPENED TO ME

THEY'RE LIKE, "OH, YEAH, NO,

YOU'RE SINGING IN THE WRONG

KEY, IT'S ACTUALLY SEVERAL KEYS

HIGHER THAN WHAT YOU HAVE COME

IN TO SING."

SO, IT WAS LIKE, "OH, GREAT, I

DON'T HAVE THAT PREPARED."

>> Jimmy: WELL, I MEAN, YOU'RE

IN A BAND WITH YOUR SISTER,

MADDIE

>> YES

>> Jimmy: YOU'RE CALLED, IS IT

"BEULAH BELLE?

>> YES

>> Jimmy: YOU JUST RELEASED

A NEW SONG "BEING YOU.

IT'S AWESOME

CONGRATULATIONS ON THAT.

>> THANKS, JIMMY

>> Jimmy: BUT THAT WASN'T YOUR

FIRST BAND WITH YOUR SISTER,

APPARENTLY

>> IT, IT WAS NOT.

WE USED TO BE CALLED "HOT

PINK."

WHICH, I THINK IS A GREAT NAME,

AND I DON'T KNOW WHY WE CHANGED

IT

>> Jimmy: THIS IS BIZARRE, BUT

WE ACTUALLY TALKED TO SOME

PEOPLE AND GOT UNSEEN FOOTAGE

FROM AN EARLY PERFORMANCE OF

YOURS.

CHECK OUT YOU ON GUITAR, THIS

IS PRETTY AWESOME.

♪ ♪

>> Jimmy: OH, MY GOSH!

>> THE COMMITMENT I HAD TO, I

THINK I REMEMBER TELLING MY

SELF, I NEED TO GET DOWN ON MY

KNEES AND REALLY GET INTO IT,

AND THEN I QUICKLY GOT UP.

I WAS NOT DOWN ON THE GROUND, I

GOT UP SO FAST

>> Jimmy: YOU ROCKED

THAT IS ONE OF THE COOLEST

THINGS

HEY, I WANT TO TALK ABOUT YOUR

PROJECTS

BECAUSE YOU HAVE SO MANY

BESIDES "DEAR EVAN HANSON.

YOU HAVE A MOVIE OUT NOW ON HBO

AND HBO MAX CALLED "COASTAL

ELITES."

HOW DID YOU GET IN THAT?

>> I GOT A CALL FROM JAY ROACH,

WHO'S THE DIRECTOR, AND HE

ASKED ME TO PLAY THE NURSE

THERE'S ALL THESE FIVE SEPARATE

MONOLOGUES ABOUT ALL OF THESE

DIFFEENT CHARACTERS TALKING

ABOUT THEIR FRUSTRATION ABOUT

THE CURRENT STATE OF THE WORLD,

AND HE ASKED ME TO BE IN IT.

AND DAN LEVY, AND SARAH PAULSON

AND EASON, AND I WAS JUST SORT

OF LIKE, "ARE YOU SURE

THIS IS A LOT OF PRESSURE.

BUT IT WAS REALLY INCREDIBLE TO

BE ABLE TO SHOOT SOMETHING IN

QUARANTINE

IT WAS WILD.

>> Jimmy: IT'S REALLY A COOL

THING TO WATCH

IT'S GREAT

YOU ALSO HAVE A NEW SERIES ON

HULU CALLED "MONSTER LAND.

IT PREMIERS TOMORROW

HOW WOULD YOU DESCRIBE THIS

ONE?

>> "MONSTER LAND" SORT OF

FOLLOWS SEVERAL CHARACTERS, WE

FOLOW, SORT OF THESE BROKEN AND

TROUBLED PEOPLE WHO ARE FORCED

TO SORT OF COPE WITH THE

DARKEST PARTS OF THEMSELVES,

AND I PLAY A YOUNG GIRL NAMED

TONI WHO IS A MOTHER TO

A 4-YEAR-OLD GIRL.

AND SHE'S ALSO TRYING TO COPE

WITH JUST, MY CHARACTER IS JUST

TRYING TO COPE WITH HER INNER

MONSTER AS WELL, AND IT'S THE

FIRST TIME I HAVE EVER PLAYED

A MOM IN MY LIFE

AND IT WAS ALSO THE FIRST TIME

I DID A CAJUN FRENCH ACCENT,

WHICH IS AS DIFFICULT AS IT

SOUNDS

>> Jimmy: YEAH

>> YEAH.

>> Jimmy: YOU KNOCKED IT OUT OF

THE PARK

HERE'S CAITLYN DEVER IN

"MONSTER LAND", TAKE A LOOK AT

THIS

>> WHERE ARE YOU FROM, ALEX?

>> NEARBY.

>> YOU LIEIN' ALREADY.

>> WHY DO YOU ASSUME THAT I'M

LYING?

>> CAUSE YOU AIN'T TALKIN'

FLAT

FOLKS HERE SOUND LIKE THEY GOT

THE LETTER "G" AWAY FROM THE

ALPHABET

>> I'M HERE DOING A JOB.

>> OH, SURE.

THEN YOU BETTER HEAL UP AND

MAKE A STRAIGHT STORY, BECAUSE

TROUBLE DON'T MAKE PAY DATE.

>> WELL, I'M NO TROUBLE.

>> YEAH, AND I'M THE QUEEN OF

SHEBA.

>> Jimmy: MY THANKS TO

CAITLYN DEVER.

"COASTAL ELITES" IS ON HBO AND

HBO MAX NOW.

AND "MONSTER LAND" PREMIERS

TOMORROW ON HULU

THANK YOUSO MUCH AGAIN FOR

COMING OUT, KAITLYN.

I APPRECIATE IT.

>> THANK YOU, JIMMY.

THANKS FOR HAVING ME

THIS IS AWESOME.

>> Jimmy: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK

WITH ANOTHER AMAZING

PERFORMANCE FROM BTS

COME ON BACK

♪

>> Jimmy: PERFORMING THE SONG

"MIKROKOSMOS" FROM THEIR HIT

ALBUM, "MAP OF THE SOUL:

PERSONA," HERE IS BTS.

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ LET US SHINE ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ OKA

LET'S GO

YOU GOT ME ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ I GOT YOU ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ HEY ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ WORLD ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ LET US SHINE ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ ONE ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ OKA

LET'S GO

YOU GOT ME ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ I GOT YOU ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ HEY ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ HEY ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ YOU GOT ME ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ I GOT YOU ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ LET'S GO ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ LET'S GO ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

♪ TONIGHT

HEY ♪

[ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE

>> LOVE YOU!

[ CHEERS AND APPLAUSE

>> Jimmy: MY THANKS TO

MICHAEL CHE, COLIN JOST,

KAITLYN DEVER, BTS, AND THE

ROOTS.

THANK YOU ALL FOR WATCHING

AND SUSAN STROMAN, IF YOU'RE

WATCHING

♪

♪ IF YOU'RE BLU

AND YOU DON'T KNOW

WHERE TO GO TO ♪

♪ WHY DON'T YOU G

WHERE FASHION SITS

PUTTIN' ON THE RITZ ♪

♪ DIFFERENT TYPES OF WEAR

ALL DAY COAT PANTS ♪

♪ WITH STRIPES AND CUT AWAY

COATS FOR PERFECT FITS

PUTTIN' ON THE RITZ ♪

♪ DRESSED UP LIKE A

MILLION DOLLAR TROOPER

TRYING HARD TO LOO

LIKE GARY COOPER ♪

♪ SUP