Original subtitles

Love: Previously on bridezillas...

This is what I've wanted my entire life.

...After stacy battled her delicious fiancé

over the budget... The world is not all... You're so damn selfish.

...Snatched her bridesmaids' meal deal... If you don't fit your dress,

you ain't gonna be in the wedding!

...And put her wedding planner on blast...

I need my planner to do his job.

...Miss thang might be left to marry herself.

I don't even know if I should marry you.

I'm done with it.

And tonight roxanne's a spoiled daddy's girl...

I'm not (bleep) boss bride, bitch!

...Willing to break her father's heart...

Are you (bleep) crazy?

She not regretting not telling him the truth.

...And kick bridesmaids to the curb.

So (bleep) her. Let her leave! Just let her leave! [overlapping arguing]

...To be a princess for a day,

but will she wind up royally dumped?

If roxanne doesn't sign a prenup,

I don't have to show up to the wedding.

-Plus... -This wedding

is gonna cost you the marriage.

Love: ...This bougie bride is pushed to the brink.

Stop calling me! [glass shatters]

...And we have front row seats. Stacy: Go!

[tires squeal] but will she even show up?

Shara: Nobody knows where stacy is.

I'm your girl, loni love.

Welcome to "bridezillas!"

♪ I just came to win, I just came to win ♪

♪ I ain't come to talk about it, I just came to win ♪

love: Meet the long island princess

whose got a thing for...Prison?

My name is roxanne filer and I'm from seaport, new york.

I am a correction officer.

I worked at rikers island for five years,

and that's where I met my future husband.

Love: Uh, this guy?

My name is todd coffee -- coffee like the drink --

and I served 14 years on rikers island. [doors slide closed]

love: That seems like a lock tie. And just to be clear,

this is not love after lockup. [buzzer sounds, doors close]

he's also a correction officer.

Love: [phews] I'm so glad. I was worried.

Todd: I fell in love with roxanne

probably after like the third date.

That was the sex in the car, that's what it -- yeah, it was --

[car horn honks] no, it wasn't the sex in the car.

Love: It's always the sex in the car.

[laughing] (bleep). I'm just saying.

We are getting married in a real-life castle.

Everything's royal -- like, meghan markle,

the royal wedding -- how everyone watched it.

Everyone's waiting to watch todd and roxanne.

[gulps] girl, bah!

I feel roxanne has totally lost her mind at this point.

I'm about to spend $100,000 on this wedding, and I don't care. [cash register dings]

I'll empty out the accounts.

We gotta spend whatever we need to do

to make this my perfect day.

"we?" todd is paying for everything.

Just smile through the pain, todd.

I have to go still pay for my gown.

Oh, I thought your dad was gonna...

I've been speaking to him about it, but you know how he is

about the last names. Do you know his --

my father doesn't want me to change my name,

but we already got our marriage license,

and it's already done. But I can't tell him right now

because I need my dress paid for.

[chuckles]

damn. So you just gonna lie to your pops?

Are we gonna tell him after the wedding?

Todd: Rocky is super tough.

He will just snap,

which gets me very, very, very nervous.

Yeah, my dad's a character.

I just manipulate my dad to get him to pay for stuff.

I get what I want all the time

because I'm the baby, and I'm the princess.

You the princess, alright.

Ooh, and I'm afraid of your daddy.

We should tell him when we're on the honeymoon

so we are far away. He can't kill one of us.

He'll kill you. 'cause he -- I'm his baby. But you --

pick a safe word, todd.

Did you, uh,

sign the prenup yet? [cash register dings] nah.

You don't have anything, so why you want a prenup to protect, what, your debt?

[record scratches]

happy life... Happy wife.

If roxanne doesn't sign, I don't have to show up to the wedding.

Then all your money's probably gonna be a waste 'cause I'm gonna be there

and I'm gonna have a wedding that day... [laughs]

...Whether you're there or not. Love: Does todd have the balls

to call roxanne's bluff? [exhales heavily]

we'll just have to see. [slurps]

♪♪

stacy man's threatened to shut down her wedding,

but her dress is finally ready.

Go for it, girl. Who needs a groom anyway?

-Hi, john. -You got that dress ready?

-The dress is ready. -I hope so.

I've had it with russell,

but I've waited my entire life for this.

It needs to be absolutely perfect.

Last time I came, the dress was too small.

Like, way too small. No.

Thought you was on your diet. [knife shinks]

I haven't been eating because I've been trying

to fit in that damn dress of mine.

Oh, what if I can't fit it, john? Don't worry.

Lord, I can't wait to get in this dress.

I can tell you, I'm gonna get in that dress.

Oh! [dramatic music plays]

mom!

Love: Ooh, that don't sound good.

Yes, sweet lord? [gasps] oh, my goodness!

Oh, my god, I can't get in. Oh, jesus.

Oh.

Just zip it up.

Love: Don't pass out, now, child.

I don't know if I can.

-Oh, stacy. -[phews]

beautiful. Is it gonna fit?

I cannot close it, this one here.

Baby, don't play with me.

Love: He ain't playing, girl. He can't close it.

This better be fixed. Now.

Okay, see the dress is so tight on her. [cloth ripping]

we can't close it. No, I cannot. So...

Okay, come. ...What are you gonna do about this?

Oh, uh...

We will fix it.

I'm hungry, I'm tired, I'm hot,

and I am so over this.

I can't have a wedding 'cause it's not gonna work for me!

Love: Well, if you ain't gonna marry him,

I know some women on tinder that will.

Dyann: Stacy. [high-pitched] just leave me alone.

You okay? Love: No, ma'am. She's not okay.

[crying] I'm tired, mom. I know.

[muffled] I'm so tired.

Aw, I kinda feel sorry for her now.

I worked so hard to get this weight off.

Not that hard.

Man: Bacon mac & cheese lollipop.

We have a crab cake I heard you love.

Stacy: It's so good.

Stacy: Everything has to be perfect

or else we're not having a wedding.

♪ jump on the floor, jump, jump on the floor ♪

♪ jump on the floor, jump, jump on the floor ♪

♪ jump on the floor, jump, jump on the floor ♪ -hey! -Hey!

Hey! Love: It's five days before the wedding,

and as if roxanne wasn't extra enough,

she has something extra planned for her bridesmaids.

Yesterday, I decided that I wanted to have a dance for todd.

-Can you help me stretch? -[chuckling] alright.

Roxanne: So, I text all my bridesmaids,

and today is the first practice.

And where is everybody?

I -- like, I'm sitting here stretching,

but nobody's here. Like, I don't get it.

Am -- I text everybody.

Everybody said they was on their way.

My maid of honor, channel.

She's my best friend. She's also my sister.

No matter what, channel has my back.

And then everybody's gonna have an issue like,

[baby talk] "oh, oh, this dance is hard, this dance is hard,"

but nobody's here on time. [knife shinks]

channel: The dance I just found out about that, like, yesterday.

If she wasn't my sister, I would definitely be out.

I probably would've left day one.

But she's my sister, and I don't have a choice.

Love: Yeah, you do.

-We have one -- -nice of you to join us.

I'm on white-people time. Love: Um, that's not a thing.

She's too demanding. Her attitude's too much.

The only reason I'm doing this is because

I'm one of todd's only cousins, I'm trying to support him,

but how the hell can I support him with this crazy bitch?

I don't give a (bleep) that that's todd's cousin.

That ain't got nothin' to do with me. Love: I like this family.

Let's go, everybody. I gonna start. Are we ready? Are we gonna start?

Jenae: So, here we go -- one, two, three, four, five, six.

Shoulders, seven, eight, up. We gonna move on pop, pop.

One, two, three. Hip, look.

Number one, number two, number three, number four.

Don't reach this way. You're gonna cover her.

That's not a thing.

Oh, hi. Welcome. This is a little ridiculous.

Roxanne: One of my bridesmaids, jasmine, is a high school friend,

and she's been an ultra problem.

She's just crazy and hood --

bottle of henny in the bag.

Like, she don't know how to act accordingly.

No. She always crazy.

Start again because everybody wants to come late.

-Is this everybody? -We have to start all over.

Nobody told you to make this (bleep) last-minute.

Love: Oh, here for it. You always got something to say.

Bring it in, bring it in, cover the bride, bring it in. Just -- just step in line.

You need to find a place. -Cover the bride. Bring it in.

Five, four. I'm late because I had a drink.

'cause I knew she was gonna be a bitch when I got here.

-Five, six, seven. Oh, no. -I gotta use the bathroom.

No, no, no, no! No bathroom! [tires squeal]

love: [gasps] beyoncé would never...

Not today! Not tonight! -(bleep) annoying.

Just shut up! And learn the dance!

Just shut up! -You shut up! Damn.

Her disrespecting me in front of everyone.

Yeah, that (bleep) up. If she doesn't get it together,

she's not gonna be walking down the aisle with me. Up, down, right, left.

Number one, number two, number three... [toilet flushing]

jas, one more thing from you, and you're out.

-Out what? -Out of the (bleep) wedding.

Shut the (bleep) up. One more thing, jas.

One more thing. It's over. I'm done.

No -- body -- everybody told you

to make a dance three days before the wedding.

Love: That's facts.

No, you just fall in line.

I'm a grown-ass lady.

You do not need to treat me as if I'm one of your inmates.

Take it back to pop-pop, please.

I knew she would've been a bitch

but not as much as a bitch that she is.

She's the bitch of the -- the biggest bitch ever.

Love: Ooh, tell me how you really feel. [whip cracks]

you just step to the side for a minute.

But nobody leaves. Nobody's leaving yet.

Oh, lord. What is she up to now?

Here we go, child.

Since everyone has been so out of control

and not listening to me, I created a code of conduct.

Roxanne: "we are finally at the final stretch

of this wedding experience."

love: "wedding experience?"

sounds like an amusement park in hell.

"until the ceremony,

no electronics... [snare drum playing]

...No gum chewing..."

jasmine: Chew gum? "...And no alcohol."

love: Is this a wedding or an intervention?

"alcohol is strictly prohibited, especially jas."

if jasmine drinks at 8:00 a.M.,

she's asleep by 12:00,

and I'm not compromising for nobody.

You have an additional signature in that section. Yeah.

She put it bold and just for my signature.

I'm not signing this (bleep).

How can she keep telling me I can't drink?

She got too many rules for nuthin'.

So (bleep) leave, then. Don't sign it. Leave. I'm not talking to you.

Don't sign it. Just leave. I'm not talking to you. I'm not talking to you.

I'm not talking to you. Just leave. Just leave.

Roxanne's an annoying, evil bitch.

Bye. I'm over this wedding.

(bleep) you and your wedding. -Jas.

-She a bitch. -So (bleep) her.

Let her leave! Just let her leave! Just let her leave! [overlapping arguing]

roxanne's changed. She's a bougie bitch.

She doesn't even realize she's gonna lose all her friends.

-Bitch! -Wooow!

I'm don't do this, so I'mma go.

You can't just walk out like that, no.

There's too many hot tamales in here. I gotta go home.

I gots to go. Too many.

I'm over it. I don't care. Do you even still want to do the dance?

Do you want a bridal party? -I'm sick of this (bleep).

My sister is stressed the (bleep) out.

I'm actually shocked because roxanne is acting all crazy.

No, I -- all I need is me. 'cause you're the bride.

'cause I am...The bride.

No one else.

Love: Coming up, roxanne's bridesmaids have bounced.

Are you (bleep) crazy?

Will daddy also ditch his little girl?

I don't wanna be part of this wedding.

You in trouble, trouble.

And he's not the only one jumping ship.

We're going to atlantic city tonight. (bleep)-ass.

I will not show up at the wedding.

Love: Then, a bougie bride's epic meltdown...

[crying] I don't want y'all in my face right now!

Love: ...Could mean the end before the wedding begins.

Russell: Whatchu mean she ain't here?

And stay tuned for the playback clappack.

[high-pitched] did you really say that about me?

Love: Two days 'til the wedding,

and stacy and her delicious snack of a groom

haven't spoken since last night.

[dial tone ringing]

hello? Where are you?

Russell, you're supposed to be here.

We have the rehearsal with the dancers.

Love: Stand up for yourself, russell.

Today, we are trying to select some praise dancers.

Love: Good. Y'all gonna need

all the prayer and worship you can get.

Stacy: So I want them to be a part of the ceremony

and dance down the aisle,

but we're still not on the same page.

And I'm like, "you need to be worried about

what I want and what I need."

you said you were done. Russell, are you really -- are you really gonna do this?

You need to be worried about what I want.

Clearly you're not here, so what does that tell me?

Love: It tells me that russell might be back on the market real soon.

I'll take care of it myself. Don't worry.

I'll take care of it myself.

Oh, she is not playing with y'all.

Not here. Not today, satan!

If russell doesn't want to come to these dance auditions,

I'll do it myself because whether we get married or not,

it's a stacy production,

it's my birthday, and I want what I want.

Love: Which is a really expensive birthday party.

Darryl. [singsong voice] hi, beautiful bride-to-be.

Please don't. No?

No. Ooh, darryl got swerved.

This is your wedding. I'm here to help you.

Chill out. I've been working very hard

to make sure that you have an amazing day.

I don't know if I'm even gonna have a wedding.

Let's rewind. You said...

There may not be a wedding?

I-I don't know what to think at this point.

One thing -- did you secure the painter?

You know what our theme is -- masterpiece. Masterpiece.

Our relationship is a masterpiece,

so we are gonna have a painter paint during the wedding.

I would need to confirm that.

We spoke with the caterer. Oh, my god!

We -- dude are you serious?!

This is some (bleep).

I don't care what he does, but he needs to make it happen.

Periot, with a "t."

love: Girl, you acting like a couple of words that start with a "b,"

but I'm just gonna just mind mine.

Let's just bring in the dancers, and let's get it over with

'cause I need to see how they are anyways.

They're gonna knock your socks off. I'll be the judge of it.

Stacy: I want them to show the love that we have for one another,

so we really want it to be really, um, sensual and loving

and just kind of display that emotion.

I want people to feel it so, you know, they could start boo-hooing.

And as soon as they start boo-hooing, I'll walk down the aisle,

and they'll really be boo-hooing.

I have some of the best dancers

that houston has to offer. Hi.

I need them to feel like they're one.

I need to see the connection.

So these dancers better be on point.

I love perfection,

and that's what I expect. [slide whistle]

if you not doing it, I'mma stop you and let you know.

Oh, god, please let her love this.

[straining] I have no more in me to give her.

♪ [speaking] love is the answer to every question ♪

wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.

What is this?

That's not gonna work. Where's the connectivity?

Love: I don't know, stacy.

They literally just started.

Look in her eyes.

I want to feel all of it.

Darryl: Can I be in charge?

These are classically trained dancers

and she's critiquing their every little move?

Y'all too far apart.

Hopefully, they don't walk out of here.

I want it just to be like -- like, hug him!

Love: Oh, so the hot guy in the tights gets a full body hug.

I see you, boo.

I feel like I bought the best dancers,

but she's out of her (bleep) mind.

And look in her eyes and just get down on your knees

and do some stuff.

Love: Get down on what? And do what? Girl, no.

Y'all are gonna give me all of that?

We can. Like, all of it.

Stacy: It cost me a lot of money to pay for this space.

I want what I want, and darryl knows

that he better make it happen. We'll -- we'll work it out.

Love: That's not your only problem.

Stacy: I'm not sure if my dress is gonna be

the way I want it to be,

and russell better get it together right now.

If he can't get it together, I don't know

if we're gonna even have this wedding.

♪ beep, beep, back it up♪ ♪ what ♪

♪ lay it down like a cement truck ♪

♪ what ♪ ♪ 'bout to take aim ♪

was this even necessary to even do a-a $3,500 rehearsal brunch? [speaking indistinctly]

love: Roxanne's crew was over it

after that hot mess of a dance practice.

So (bleep) her! Let her leave! Just let her leave! [overlapping arguing]

bitch!

Love: But everyone likes brunch.

Todd is, like, complaining about the money, like, already.

He knows how important this day is to me.

I need things to be perfect.

[gasping, whines] oh relax.

You know, we're on the water.

So I felt like having fish

just made it seem more, you know, alive.

You just killed a fish, todd. I didn't kill a fish.

It's on the floor. You grab it and put it in the water.

You -- you grab it.

Todd, the fish is gonna die! Grab the fish.

He's alright. He's alright.

[chuckling] I saved a life today.

Love: Yeah, girl. That was all you.

Hey, what's going on, dude?

What up, [indistinct]?

Roxanne: I really need to talk to channel.

She doesn't know that I'm lying to my dad.

She may say something to him. I'm gonna tell my dad

but I'm just gonna tell him after the wedding.

So, dad doesn't want me to change my name... Yeah, I know.

...And I went to get my marriage license already,

and I changed it.

Are you (bleep) crazy?

My dad, rocky, when he's mad, he gets nasty.

When are you gonna tell him this?

[chuckling] after the wedding

because he has to pay for my dress tomorrow.

You crazy.

Don't say anything, channel.

I'm not gonna say nothing. That's your business.

It's absolutely shady that she's not telling him

so that he can just still pay for everything.

It's definitely gonna be hard to keep this secret.

[engine revving]

love: This must be daddy.

Ooh, he's a badass!

And he rolled in "d."

hey, dad!

Rocky: I'm rocky,

father of the bride, and that's my princess.

I'm her number-one man in her life.

Todd is gonna be number two.

Love: That seems healthy.

That's my baby, and this is what we do.

-I need to talk to you, dad. -What do you want to talk about?

Today, I need to talk to him about paying for the gown.

If he doesn't, I'm gonna have to walk down the aisle in what?

My prom dress? No.

I have to go pay for my dress. Oh --

are you gonna pay for my dress?

No, no-no, no-no, no-no, no. I'm not paying for the dress.

So, how am I gonna walk down the aisle -- with no dress on?

Roxanne wants to spend a whole bunch of money to go in debt,

and she wants me to go in debt with her.

But this is not happening.

I'm not paying for it, roxanne. Dad --

I'm not paying for it.

Love: King rocky has spoken.

Roxanne: I know how to get him to pay for stuff.

I just manipulate my dad just a little bit.

So I gotta do what I gotta do.

[giggling]

and that's -- what if I consider keeping my name?

Love: You mean the name you already changed?

I want her to keep her name to be a filer.

She's the baby of the bunch,

and hopefully that's what's gonna happen.

I'll figure out what I can do, and we'll go from there. Okay. I love you, dad.

Alright?

If it doesn't happen,

she ain't gonna see me at the wedding.

Let's go eat. I just need my stuff paid for.

[laughing] once every thing's paid for, I don't even care.

Love: Even a tough guy like rocky

ain't a match for a bride on the hustle.

She definitely playing with fire with him

because that's -- that's something that's real serious.

I mean, he gets emotional about that.

He's just gonna get really hurt,

and she gonna regret not telling him the truth.

Love: Coming up, when roxanne tries to hustle her dad...

So $7,500.

...Will sis sell her down the river?

You gonna talk to him about that other thing?

Let's get the dress paid for first,

and then we'll speak about everything else.

When? Today?

Then, stacy may have finally had it with russell...

I'm not going home tonight.

I don't even know if I want to be with him at this point.

...While russell may be having a change of heart himself.

I don't even know if I need to be getting married.

[crying] I don't want y'all in my face right now!

Stacy: Go, go! [tires squeal]

russell: A room full of people, and we have no bride.

[indistinct shouting]

love: It's the night before the wedding,

and stacy and russell have decided

to spend some time apart.

And I just need to really detox and get away from russell.

Love: Right, 'cause russell's the toxic one.

At this point, I've had it with stacy.

I came over here tonight to relax and chill

and hang out with the fellas.

Love: Ooh, what do we have here? [funky music plays]

I see detective yum yum has a snack pack.

[slaps butt] ah! Meanwhile...

What the hell is this thing? [record scratches]

you about to learn quick!

Shara: How the hell you gonna put me on a bike

and tell me to pedal around houston

in 110-degree weather? Oh, (bleep).

How am I'mma get up here? [stammering] girl, are you trying to kill me?

I'mma die. Love: Save shara, y'all.

Woman: [straining] oh, my god. [indistinct chatter]

we're doing a pedal party today

for one, so that I can get my sweat on

and put that beautiful dress on,

and a lot of my bridesmaids -- well not a lot, but some --

need to lose a couple of pounds.

You messy. Love: Who's messy?

This thing is not made for big girls. [indistinct chatter]

everybody's got some weight on 'em!

Exercising for a party is not a party.

[bicycle bell chimes] love: Watch your hands, sir.

[boinging] [chiming continues]

woman: Don't fall 'cause that's a lot of air!

[bell clanging] alright, let's do this!

We gonna pedal, bitches! Pedal, pedal!

[indistinct screaming, chatter]

you keep pedaling. Keep pedaling!

Katie! [bell chimes]

she has totally lost her mind.

Like, she is a she-devil at this point.

[distorted roaring]

[bell chimes]

(bleep), I don't even know if I need to be getting married, man.

Oh, come on, now. One, I don't work for you.

-[chuckling] -two, I ain't your child.

Three, you can't talk to me any kind of way.

As far as stacy and russell,

it doesn't matter what I think at this point.

Love: Who needs opinions when you've got muscles like that?

She made me sleep on the damn couch last night.

-That's your bed. -Ouchy. Ah...

Love: I'll keep you warm, detective. [laughter]

the one day I've been waiting my whole life for.

One day!

I mean, if you not team stacy,

then I don't need you.

[mimicking] why you ain't team stacy?

I thought you were team stacy.

What about me? This is my day.

It's my birthday.

Love: Y'all need some counseling.

I wonder if they do walk-ins.

Y'all need to tell russell he needs to get on my case.

Well, call him! I'll tell him.

-I'm calling him! -Don't call russell!

So, russell is sick of her. He tired.

I'm tired. Everybody's tired.

People are tir-ed.

Love: And she got you out here pedaling in the streets.

The disrespect.

[dial tone rings] -now you be quiet. -Where you at?

Why are you worried about what I'm doing?

You don't start this right now,

like "[shrilly] where you at? Where you at?"

at this point, you don't get to ask where I am.

Because we need to talk.

I need you to come meet me.

Love: She gonna kill you, russell.

Don't do it.

I ain't meeting you. I'm busy.

-What? [speaking indistinctly] -see, cray-cray.

Cray-cray.

You too busy for me?

I'mma show you how busy I am.

[dial tone sounds] she just hung up in my face.

No, what you 'bout to do? Sit right here.

Have this drink. He better change his name. [laughter]

she's gotta take it zero to 100, all the way up here,

and she driving me crazy with it.

I've had it.

I done told her on more than one occasion --

this wedding is gonna cost you the marriage.

Love: It's not too late to change your mind, detective.

He could've said, "yes baby.

I'll come to you. I'll meet you."

he don't care about me like that.

So for me, I'm wondering like, "dude do you even want this?"

love: Sounds like y'all have a few things to work out

before the wedding.

I'm not going home tonight. I'm not.

What do you want to do? I'm just gonna --

I'm just gonna stay at your place.

Alright. I'm not going. I'm not.

I really don't know if russell is the one.

I don't even know if I want to be with him at this point.

Love: It's time for roxanne to pick up her $7,500 dream dress.

Hi-hi!

This (bleep) better look good

because I'm spending a lot of money on it.

Love: Sure hope daddy shows up. I'm not paying for the dress.

And that's -- what if I consider keeping my name?

I'll figure out what I can do, and we'll go from there. Okay. I love you, dad.

Alright?

Woman: Here she comes.

[wagner's "bridal chorus" plays]

-(bleep) -look how beautiful she looks.

Love: You look good, girl! Roxanne: The dress is amazing.

I feel so amazing to have the dress on.

Yes, come on, fake meghan. You better -- [chuckles]

meghan markle, she's like my idol,

so I have to look as good as her.

Love: I heard they got an opening in the duchess department.

The veil -- it's not long enough, allie.

Allie: It's super long.

Meghan markle's is longer. No, it's not.

You need four people to at least to help you with this.

Love: She doesn't even have four bridesmaids any more.

Let me show you how long I want it.

Get the measuring tape.

She a little bit of a --

a little diva. [laughs]

I want it down there to the red.

I need, like, three more tape measures for that.

Well, go and get three.

I need my dress to be perfect for $7,500.

Love: Speaking of $7,500.

Oh, you mean the last name you already changed

then lied to your father to extort him?

He'll get over it, eventually.

We just talk about it when he get here.

If not now, then when?

Be honest.

Stop acting crazy and grow up.

Big-girl panties, right? You're getting married.

You about to be a whole wife. That's a wife.

I'm gonna talk to him about it right now.

He doesn't know that she already changed the name

'cause she's definitely deceiving him.

She needs to tell him or I will

'cause this is wrong.

Alright, I gotta go take this off...

Love: Ooh, daddy. I love me some leather.

I'm coming to the bridal store to see the dress...

-Yo, nel. -...'cause that's my princess,

and she really doesn't know how much this means to me.

Ready to pay your coins? How much money?

I don't know 'bout no money. You know I won't get into it like that.

I don't be asking no questions.

Oh! Where's the dress? Hi, dad! I t--

that's -- that's the dress? No, I took it off.

I just want you to see it on the wedding day.

So $7,500.

But I thought it as like a couple of thousand dollars.

Yeah, $7,500.

A couple is $1,000, $2,000.

Love: Math is so hard sometimes.

This is unbelievable.

Getting stuck with a lot more money

than I thought that I was gonna pay from the beginning.

Please don't hate me. She's gonna be -- she's gonna be paying for half of the dress.

Love: Hate to tell you, rocky, but that wasn't even the bad news.

Yo, but you gonna talk to him about that other thing?

Let's get the dress paid for first,

and then we'll speak about everything else. When? Today?

[chuckling] did I ask right now? Like, what are you doing?

Hello!

Love: Oh, she know what she doing.

[channel and roxanne laugh] [cash register dings]

thank you, allie. I don't want you to change your mind. No problem.

So I got my dress paid for.

She's definitely out of line.

You been lying long enough.

Let's do this the right way, put your big-girl panties on,

keep 'em moving. That's it.

You need to talk to him 'bout somethin' else?

What else has to -- come on, roxanne.

Love: Busted.

This dress cost me money.

Even more money at the wedding. This may not be about no money.

What is this -- this is about? This may not be no money.

Roxanne: I'm scared to tell my dad.

I need to make todd happy because todd's who I'm marrying.

I really don't wanna tell him 'cause he's gonna be upset.

Love: Coming up, roxanne's trail of lies

is finally catching up to her.

You're chasing me away today. Alright.

You in trouble, trouble.

Love: Then... Stacy: Go! [tires squeal]

a room full of people, and we have no bride.

Woman: Have y'all heard from stacy? Ohh, lord, jesus. Help us, jesus.

May I put lotion on my feet? Okay.

This (bleep) is tight! [chuckles]

grab that feet.

Team effort, over here. Yep.

So, I have to, like, put lotion on my feet

in order to get them inside the shoe.

Love: Ohh, girl, you want the business.

[laughing] come on, allie, stop laughing. It's not funny.

Hey, girl, I don't rub feet for a living.

Now go up my leg. Alright.

Thank you. Come on, get it together. Hold on, lift this up.

Thank god I ain't got you on the wedding day.

[chuckles]

[laughing] never, never.

♪♪

stacy: Did you get your make up done already?

Love: It's stacy's wedding day,

and even though she hasn't made up with her fiancé,

she has priorities -- makeup.

I really don't know if russell is the one.

I don't even know if I want to be with him at this point.

I'm exhausted. I haven't talked to russell.

We have a few hours left to get ready,

and hopefully my dress will fit because they fixed it.

I need to look beautiful, elegant,

and it's going to be that way.

Can I get a mimosa?

C-can I get a mimosa?

Love: Someone get this woman a mimosa.

She is the bride. Come on, now.

We all gonna have to be ready by 2:00.

Everybody. So, at this point,

nobody has time to be playing with stacy.

Hello?

'cause I-I know y'all have so much going on.

They really are getting on my nerves.

Love: On your nerves?

It's my birthday, and my wedding day.

And y'all ain't doing nothing.

Stacy, now, I have been here for you. [indistinct chatter]

I half-went bankrupt for you.

I almost had to go back into the strip club behind you.

Don't do me like that. Love: Girl.

Why do I have to get my own drink?

How's russell holding up?

[indistinct] we're getting down to the wire.

Those wedding days been a little -- little hectic.

Love: But life as stacy's husband is gonna be cake walk.

If stacy doesn't show up after all the hell I've been through,

I'm gonna be pissed. I'm gonna be the groomszilla.

Love: I guess she finally decided to get her own drink.

You almost done for real?

E'rybody else done got beautified except for me.

I'm the bride people!

[distorted] hello.

Somebody call a priest. We need a exorcism in here.

["psycho" violin screeches]

-uh-oh. -Yes, ma'am.

Where's my birthday cake?

Up your ass. [gasps]

[muttering] if I had a birthday cake, I'd smash it in her face.

It's her day.

And her birthday.

And her wedding.

Ohh, I'm just tired of hearing it.

Love: That's the spirit, girl.

Stacy, how much longer are you gonna be?

Because we got to get ready. [cellphone rings]

everybody's supposed to have been there by 2:00.

Hello?

This is b.S. For real, for real?

Are you kidding me?

This is not happening.

Love: Oh, it's happening.

Stacy: We were supposed to be out at 2:00.

[hums]

my day is going (bleep). [crying]

you know at 2:00, people are still

getting their makeup done,

so we got kicked out. -It's chaos.

Stacy: My makeup's not done. I don't have my dress on.

I have nothing. -Nobody was ready,

but there's nowhere else for us to go.

Shara: We don't know what's going on. I don't know who to blame.

At this point, we don't know who to put the blame on.

I don't know.

[crying] she hasn't even finished my makeup yet!

I don't want y'all in my face right now!

Period. Like, for real. [cellphone ringing]

stop calling me! [glass shatters]

oh, stacy.

Maybe it's gonna be world war iii around here.

Everybody's gonna have to evacuate the premises.

It's gonna be hurricane stacy coming through here.

Dyann: You can get out like that.

♪♪

[car horn honks]

stacy: Go, go! [tires squeal]

♪♪

you need to talk to him 'bout somethin' else?

Roxanne: I do not want to tell my father

that I've changed my name completely

until after the wedding,

but at this point I'm just in it.

She got me (bleep) up.

♪♪

[indistinct] I changed... My last name already.

What me and you talked about --

you said to me that you was gonna...

I said I was gonna speak to todd,

and todd wants me to change my name,

so I changed my name already.

Love: Oh, well good thing this is all on todd,

and it's todd's fault.

All "t," all shay.

Yeah, but you're not... I'm always gonna be a-a filer.

That's my maiden name, so I'm always gonna be roxanne filer.

Love: Except... It's gone. It's done.

Yeah, I don't got the last name. I'm a coffey now.

I'm mrs. Coffey. Mrs. Roxanne coffey.

[boing]

she baited me to the bridal shop.

Because if she'd'a told me this at the brunch,

I woulda never showed up.

[voice breaking] I told you what I wanted.

♪♪

25 years ago, I was shot 21 times.

The 22nd time,

the guy put the gun to my head,

and roxanne stopped him.

She represents the filers to the fullest.

You know that I was very, very, very passionate about that.

If it's gonna be that, I really don't wanna come.

I don't wanna be part of this wedding,

you know what I mean, and it's not right.

-Dad, don't say that. -But it's not right.

I'm serious.

And I hope you don't show that much to todd

or you'll wind up chasing him away

like you're chasing me away today.

Love: Wow, that's cold.

You in trouble, trouble.

Roxanne is definitely hurting people left and right,

and, mnh-mnh-mnh, I don't know

if she's gonna come back from this one.

This one's a serious one.

♪♪

love: It's 30 minutes before stacy's big production,

and three hours since anyone's seen the bride.

Stacy: Go, go!

She's not answering her phone.

I don't know what's going on.

I don't think she have her phone.

Nobody knows where stacy is.

She better show up. I can call 911.

She's m.I.A. We don't know.

Love: You don't seem that upset.

Ohh, lord, jesus. Help us, jesus,

'cause this -- it's -- I don't know what to say.

Love: Maybe you should ask her fiancé?

What up, detective yum yum?

Russell: Whatchu mean she ain't here?

We're supposed to start at 6:00. Uh, we're...

A little behind right now. What happened?

Love: Well, there was this --

get out. Just run your mouth. Run your mouth.

We're not getting married. Love: And this --

I can't have a wedding 'cause it's not gonna work for me!

And this --

I don't even know if I want to be with him at this point.

We got kicked out for time, and she started cryin'.

From that, I don't know.

A room full of people, and we have no bride.

Bride's a little m.I.A. M.I.A.?

M.I.A. Mean "missing in action." man: Well, hold on, hold on.

Love: No, (bleep). Maybe detective russell

should issue a apb. Man over radio: Be on the lookout for stacy.

[police siren wailing] last seen throwing a fit and escaping her wedding party.

Suspect is considered mad, volatile,

and potentially wearing white.

She's probably got cold feet. No, no didn't get cold feet.

Love: She ain't there, though.

Do you know where she at? Not exactly.

Ain't you got some police friends you can call?

A woman is missing, people!

No matter what, this wedding is definitely happening.

Man, you in denial.

100k says it has to be. [exhales sharply]

love: At least darryl is holding it together.

I am about to (bleep) my pants. Like, seriously.

Love: When you gotta go, you gotta go.

She'll be here. She ain't that crazy.

Okay, maybe she is, but I doubt she do it today.

Maybe. Perhaps.

She'll be here! She better. [indistinct chatter]

love: You keep the faith, russell!

Mama be here just in case. [chuckles]

russell: I'm gonna stand up there 'til she get here.

Hopefully, the bride's okay.

I must admit, I'm a little nervous

that she may not come. [clock ticking]

man over intercom: They're here. We're about to start.

♪♪

love: And still no sign of the bride!

Russell: Right now, we're playing a waiting game.

Uh, the bride's running a little late.

Love: Just a little.

She wanted these praise dancers so bad,

but she's not even here to see it.

Everything looks wonderful and all that.

Sure cost a lot of money. But right now,

we're just waiting around, trying to see

what's gonna be the next move.

Love: You are so out of moves right now.

You one step away from becoming a meme.

Russell: I must admit, I'm a little nervous that she may not come.

Love: Listen baby, these things happen.

Even a detective as fine as yourself.

Let me give you my digits real quick.

[engine revs]

[tires squeal]

damn it!

I was...Pretty upset.

Everybody else got their stuff done.

I didn't get my stuff done. I had nowhere to go,

so we ended up going to my aunt's place.

I needed to get myself together. I needed a break

because nobody's doing what I need them to do.

I just, I-I needed to step away. I needed a breather.

Love: Never mind all that, girl.

You looking like a stack of cash, honey, yas.

[hip hop version of pachelbel's "canon in d" plays] russell: As I look at her, I'm not thinking about a budget.

And I'm looking into those beautiful brown eyes,

and it's like this is where I need to be.

Oh, my god, this is it. I love this man.

[music winds down] love: Good thing you showed up, then.

I, russell, have taken you, stacy, to be my wife.

You only have one time

to get it right. In plenty and in want.

And I feel like we got it right.

-In sickness and in health. -We love each other.

I love the hell outta him,

and I know he loves the hell outta me...

As long as we both shall live.

...And that's on life.

Russell, what do you bring as a sign of your promise?

-Rings. Ching, ching. -Rings! [laughs]

[shrieking] love: At least she's back on track for what's really important.

You may kiss your bride.

[upbeat music plays] [cheering]

love: Stacy finally got her dream wedding,

and russell got....Stacy.

Can we get over all this mushy (bleep)

'cause y'all gonna have me crying'...

[laughing] like, for real.

Spoken like a true bridezilla.

[exhales sharply]

♪♪

emcee: Mr. And mrs. Russell gray!

[cheering]

I'm married to this wonderful man next to me,

and I feel absolutely amazing.

Amazing! [chuckling]

I-I-I -- I got everything -- I'm not done yet.

[laughs]

y'all know I can't dance!

But I'mma acting like I can.

Love: It's a good thing you pretty.

Baby, I just want to know how good do I look in this dress?

Tell me 'cause I need to know.

Love: Or tell the tailor who worked a minor miracle,

and minor miracles sure don't come cheap, russell.

[cash register dinging] I'm just trying to figure out how much this dress cost

'cause I'm sure there's another cost associated with it. Are you kidding me?

[chuckling] are you really serious?

Russell, that dress is the least of your problems.

We spent...

She spent. ...Probably about

$100-- $110,000 to $120,000.

[high-pitched] (bleep) damn!

[cash register dings] from the food

to the décor to the praise dancers,

to the painters.

That's gonna be amazing. Oh, yeah.

Absolutely. That's perfect.

Then there's darryl.

Love: Watch out, darryl. She's coming for you.

[slurping]

darryl.

Hell yeah! [chuckling] yes!

Dude...

You did it, darryl. How you feelin'?

This is definitely my last stacy production,

my last stacy event --

guy stacy, girl stacys.

Even if your last name is stacy.

If you live on stacy street.

I don't wanna talk to you.

[cheering]

love: Now that there's an official wrap on the stacy production,

it's time for the playback clapback.

Starting with her creative director, darryl.

I want praise dancers.

This bitch is crazy. [shrieks]

-[laughs] -I cannot believe

he would go to the extent to call me a "b" -- a "b!"

[high-pitched] I'm like, "who he talking about?!

This is what I've wanted my entire life.

Russell: She crazy as hell.

Wait a minute, hold on. I heard that.

Did you tell me I was crazy?! [laughing]

love: Hold up, though. Remember this?

I'm sick of you right now. Get out.

We're not getting married. Mm-hmm. Hi.

I was just a little emotional at that time.

Baby, I'm sorry. Mm-hmm.

Love: So, come on girl. Did anyone give you two gifts?

Russell right here even got me a couple of gifts

'cause he knew better. He knew better.

But I did. I'm -- I-I expect two gifts.

[scoffs] nothin' less.

By the way, hi, detective yum yum.

Listen here, honey. Let me tell you somin.

This one right here. You can't have him, boo.

He is yummy. Yum yum to whose tummy?

Mine. So no, no honey.

No, no. Ain't that right baby?

Mwah. That's my baby.