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Sync & corrections by Costa Dax
www.addic7ed.com
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The lizard men will no longer
be subject to rat oppression!
3
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Aw, they're not oppressed.
4
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We raise them as food.
5
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They-they like it.
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Well, we are delicious.
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No. You should be free
to do whatever you want.
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- What do lizards like to do?
- Mm, bask?
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Okay. Then you should bask
without fear of being eaten.
10
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Well, that does sounds nice.
11
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This will not stand!
12
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Buddy, my captain's
on the way right now.
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It's funny. Normally, I'm, like,
a huge disappointment to her,
14
00:00:51,113 --> 00:00:52,513
but this time she's gonna be pumped
15
00:00:52,572 --> 00:00:54,053
that I rooted out injustice.
16
00:00:54,136 --> 00:00:55,429
And here comes the praise,
17
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- in five...
- Attention, everyone.
18
00:00:57,473 --> 00:01:00,309
I'm afraid my ensign
has made a huge mistake.
19
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- What?
- Starfleet is forbidden
20
00:01:02,061 --> 00:01:04,188
from interfering in
your planetary politics.
21
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You will be free to
determine your future
22
00:01:06,274 --> 00:01:07,900
without our influence.
23
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What? How could you... Oh,
screw the Prime Directive!
24
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Hey.
25
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You are way out of bounds here.
26
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They're eating those guys.
27
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What am I supposed to do?
28
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Report it to me.
29
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Now I have to explain why
there's an interspecies war
30
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on a planet that was peaceful yesterday!
31
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Oh, so you're yelling at
me for spreading freedom
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because you don't feel
like filing a report?
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Mariner, I swear, if you
weren't my daughter,
34
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you'd be off the Cerritos.
35
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If I wasn't your daughter,
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you wouldn't be such
a bitch all the time!
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That's it. That's it! When
we get back to the ship,
38
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- you are going straight to...
- Yeah, yeah, I know.
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Straight to the brig. Shocker.
40
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Oh, you're not going to the brig.
41
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You're going to therapy.
42
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What?! You think I need therapy?
43
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What? That's... No!
44
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It's the '80s, dude.
45
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We don't have psychiatric problems.
46
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You're a loose cannon.
47
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I don't care how many lizards you save.
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You need professional help.
49
00:01:57,533 --> 00:02:00,286
Dr. Migleemo? Oh, he's the
worst counselor in the fleet!
50
00:02:00,369 --> 00:02:02,830
He just tosses out
nonstop food metaphors!
51
00:02:02,914 --> 00:02:04,290
That's an order, Ensign.
52
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Freeman to Cerritos.
53
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One to beam up.
54
00:02:06,552 --> 00:02:08,512
I don't need therapy!
55
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Okay, look, will you
stop eating these guys
56
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if we give you food replicators?
57
00:02:13,674 --> 00:02:15,718
Ha. I don't know. Can
they make nutrient pellets?
58
00:02:15,801 --> 00:02:16,969
Yes!
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00:03:28,457 --> 00:03:30,376
Mariner, this report is
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00:03:30,459 --> 00:03:33,379
a veritable fruit salad
of insubordination.
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I don't want to be here.
I broke the rules.
62
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I'm supposed to be in the brig.
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00:03:36,298 --> 00:03:37,425
Sorry. Captain's orders.
64
00:03:37,508 --> 00:03:39,552
She wants us to meet every week,
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cooking up some healthy strategies
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to marinate you into the
officer she knows you can be.
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00:03:44,415 --> 00:03:45,415
I don't want your help!
68
00:03:45,474 --> 00:03:47,154
I want to show the
captain that she's wrong
69
00:03:47,155 --> 00:03:48,853
and then get put... in... the... brig!
70
00:03:48,936 --> 00:03:50,688
Full stop, Beckett.
71
00:03:50,771 --> 00:03:53,232
We need to find an
outlet for all that rage.
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Have you ever made paella?
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Nice shot, da Vinci!
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- Grazie.
- Hey, guys.
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00:04:00,674 --> 00:04:02,157
Do you mind if I take over the deck?
76
00:04:02,158 --> 00:04:04,659
I've got a big evaluation with
Captain Freeman this afternoon.
77
00:04:04,660 --> 00:04:06,300
She's selecting eager
to please candidates
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00:04:06,301 --> 00:04:07,744
for her advanced diplomacy workshop.
79
00:04:07,747 --> 00:04:09,749
Problem is, I don't know
how eager to please.
80
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Ugh, I got to practice.
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Computer, load program Boimler seven.
82
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- Ciao, da Vinci.
- Ciao, Tendi.
83
00:04:19,216 --> 00:04:21,343
Ugh, you simulated the crew?
84
00:04:21,427 --> 00:04:22,887
Yeah, that way, I can pre-interview
85
00:04:22,970 --> 00:04:24,889
so I don't make any
mistakes when it's for real.
86
00:04:24,972 --> 00:04:26,432
I uploaded seven years of entries
87
00:04:26,496 --> 00:04:28,016
from the entire crew's private logs...
88
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Aren't those private?
89
00:04:29,103 --> 00:04:30,423
...and it algorithmically created
90
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a perfect simulation of
everyone on the Cerritos.
91
00:04:32,688 --> 00:04:35,399
They'll respond exactly the
way they would in real life.
92
00:04:35,423 --> 00:04:36,423
Ah.
93
00:04:36,445 --> 00:04:37,525
Hey, buddy. How's it going?
94
00:04:37,526 --> 00:04:38,846
Don't talk to me! I'm pissed off!
95
00:04:38,847 --> 00:04:42,017
Whoa! Amazing! We had that exact
same conversation an hour ago.
96
00:04:42,073 --> 00:04:44,950
Yeah. Ah. All I got to
do is feed it a scenario.
97
00:04:45,034 --> 00:04:47,578
Then the simulated
crew fills in the blanks.
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00:04:47,661 --> 00:04:49,288
It'll give me an edge in my interview.
99
00:04:50,372 --> 00:04:51,791
- Ahoy, Cap'n.
- "Ahoy"?
100
00:04:51,874 --> 00:04:54,126
See? I just learned not to say that.
101
00:04:54,210 --> 00:04:56,378
Congrats on the brownnosing
program, butt-kisser.
102
00:04:56,462 --> 00:04:58,005
Only you would... Wait.
103
00:04:58,089 --> 00:05:00,174
This is a perfect simulation?
104
00:05:01,500 --> 00:05:02,500
What was that?
105
00:05:02,551 --> 00:05:03,711
Hey, hey, what are you doing?
106
00:05:03,719 --> 00:05:05,638
"Interior. Rickety
metal catwalk. Night"?
107
00:05:05,721 --> 00:05:07,601
Mariner! You can't write
that about the captain.
108
00:05:07,602 --> 00:05:09,375
Why waste this on some
dumb interview prep?
109
00:05:09,458 --> 00:05:11,559
- I'm putting in my own parameters.
- If Freeman sees this,
110
00:05:11,560 --> 00:05:12,640
you'll get court-martialed.
111
00:05:12,641 --> 00:05:13,643
What did she ever do to you?
112
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You say I need therapy?
113
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Okay, I'll go to therapy.
114
00:05:15,648 --> 00:05:17,691
Mariner, don't touch my
code! Don't touch my...
115
00:05:17,775 --> 00:05:19,485
Therapy...!
116
00:05:21,028 --> 00:05:23,155
What the hell? What did
you do to my program?
117
00:05:23,239 --> 00:05:24,857
I made it into an awesome movie.
118
00:05:24,940 --> 00:05:26,659
Oh, I'm gonna work some [BLEEP] out.
119
00:05:28,266 --> 00:05:29,684
All right!
120
00:05:29,767 --> 00:05:31,163
Ooh, nice font.
121
00:05:31,247 --> 00:05:33,499
No, no, what are you
talking about? A movie?
122
00:05:33,582 --> 00:05:35,709
What, you wrote out a
whole script in two seconds?
123
00:05:35,793 --> 00:05:37,962
I just, like, hit the act breaks,
124
00:05:38,045 --> 00:05:39,630
- couple set pieces.
- Set pieces?
125
00:05:39,713 --> 00:05:40,888
The computer's filling in the rest.
126
00:05:40,889 --> 00:05:42,489
I made parts for the crew and all of us!
127
00:05:42,490 --> 00:05:43,490
It's gonna be great!
128
00:05:43,525 --> 00:05:45,594
I don't want to do a movie!
129
00:05:45,678 --> 00:05:47,638
That's okay. You were kind
of a Xon, to be honest.
130
00:05:47,721 --> 00:05:49,361
You probably weren't
gonna make final cut.
131
00:05:49,362 --> 00:05:50,362
- Who's Xon?
- Exactly.
132
00:05:50,432 --> 00:05:52,032
Ooh, I've always wanted
to be in a movie!
133
00:05:52,076 --> 00:05:53,636
Can I be the voice of the ship?
134
00:05:53,637 --> 00:05:54,645
"Red alert! Red alert!"
135
00:05:54,711 --> 00:05:56,271
No, no, I got the perfect part for you.
136
00:05:56,272 --> 00:05:57,565
- You're gonna love it.
- Guys!
137
00:05:57,648 --> 00:05:59,191
This is an important work tool,
138
00:05:59,275 --> 00:06:00,875
not a fun thing to
have a good time with.
139
00:06:00,959 --> 00:06:02,759
Boimler, pipe down. Shh.
Come on, the credits.
140
00:06:02,794 --> 00:06:04,029
I don't want this.
141
00:06:04,048 --> 00:06:05,488
- I just want to prep.
- Well, tough.
142
00:06:05,489 --> 00:06:07,289
You're just gonna have
to wait till it's over.
143
00:06:07,290 --> 00:06:09,370
Come on, come on, come on,
let's go get into costume.
144
00:06:09,371 --> 00:06:11,091
- Okey-dokey!
- I'm not getting in anything.
145
00:06:11,128 --> 00:06:13,664
Mariner! I want these credits gone now!
146
00:06:13,747 --> 00:06:15,040
Hmm.
147
00:06:15,124 --> 00:06:17,168
Wha...?
148
00:06:20,588 --> 00:06:21,680
Yeah!
149
00:06:21,763 --> 00:06:23,048
Happy birthday, Captain!
150
00:06:23,132 --> 00:06:24,842
I might be getting up in years,
151
00:06:24,925 --> 00:06:27,219
but I still hold the
hydroscoot speed record
152
00:06:27,303 --> 00:06:28,512
back at the Academy!
153
00:06:28,596 --> 00:06:30,008
Captain out!
154
00:06:30,009 --> 00:06:31,690
Whoa!
155
00:06:31,773 --> 00:06:33,392
- Get him, Captain!
- Shut up!
156
00:06:33,475 --> 00:06:34,768
I'll kill you! I...
157
00:06:34,852 --> 00:06:36,937
Oh, I can't stay mad.
158
00:06:39,106 --> 00:06:40,141
Good one, Cap'n!
159
00:06:40,224 --> 00:06:42,583
I don't remember giving you
permission to scoot with us, Ensign.
160
00:06:42,584 --> 00:06:44,224
Yeah, actually, I need
to borrow the cap'n
161
00:06:44,295 --> 00:06:46,197
- for a quick interview.
- It's her birthday!
162
00:06:46,280 --> 00:06:47,960
Um, can I at least ask
what she likes more,
163
00:06:47,961 --> 00:06:50,409
when bridge officers
arrive early or stay late?
164
00:06:50,492 --> 00:06:51,952
A question like that makes me think
165
00:06:52,036 --> 00:06:54,163
you're asking the wrong questions.
166
00:06:54,246 --> 00:06:55,581
Good... to... know.
167
00:06:55,624 --> 00:06:56,944
Sorry to interrupt your vacation.
168
00:06:56,945 --> 00:06:58,250
This isn't a vacation.
169
00:06:58,334 --> 00:07:00,419
It's important scientific research.
170
00:07:00,502 --> 00:07:02,796
Vacation's over.
171
00:07:03,631 --> 00:07:05,925
Sorry for the short
notice, Captain Freeman.
172
00:07:06,008 --> 00:07:07,468
Not a problem at all, Admiral.
173
00:07:07,551 --> 00:07:09,631
- How can we help?
- We've received a bizarre message
174
00:07:09,632 --> 00:07:10,988
from the leaders of Idlocana XI.
175
00:07:11,071 --> 00:07:12,473
Their president wanted to thank us
176
00:07:12,556 --> 00:07:13,974
for a wonderful second contact
177
00:07:14,058 --> 00:07:15,476
with the crew of the San Clemente.
178
00:07:15,559 --> 00:07:16,894
So? What's wrong with that?
179
00:07:16,977 --> 00:07:19,730
Starfleet doesn't have a San Clemente.
180
00:07:19,813 --> 00:07:23,484
Whoever second-contacted
them wasn't our ship.
181
00:07:23,567 --> 00:07:24,944
What a mystery.
182
00:07:25,027 --> 00:07:26,487
Uh, whose boy is this?
183
00:07:26,570 --> 00:07:27,780
Ensign Brad Boimler, sir.
184
00:07:27,863 --> 00:07:29,615
Here to learn.
185
00:07:29,698 --> 00:07:31,033
This impostor...
186
00:07:31,116 --> 00:07:32,993
you want the Cerritos to investigate?
187
00:07:33,077 --> 00:07:35,287
Get in, get me intel, then get out.
188
00:07:35,371 --> 00:07:37,623
And, Freeman, stick
to the plan this time.
189
00:07:37,706 --> 00:07:40,125
If this was actually happening,
they'd send the Enterprise.
190
00:07:40,209 --> 00:07:41,919
But, you know, artistic license.
191
00:07:42,002 --> 00:07:44,338
Luckily, the Cerritos just
went through some upgrades.
192
00:07:44,421 --> 00:07:47,716
We should be more than
suitable for the task.
193
00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:52,596
The Cerritos is ready to
launch whenever you are.
194
00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:54,139
Oh.
195
00:07:54,223 --> 00:07:55,683
There she is.
196
00:08:51,238 --> 00:08:53,907
She never fails to take my breath away.
197
00:08:53,991 --> 00:08:56,493
- I wish I could kiss her and squeeze her.
- Excuse me?
198
00:08:56,577 --> 00:08:59,538
Uh, uh, the Cerritos is a handsome lady.
199
00:08:59,621 --> 00:09:01,707
You're damn right about that, Boimler.
200
00:09:01,790 --> 00:09:05,586
Call the ship a handsome lady.
201
00:09:14,845 --> 00:09:16,805
Hmm.
202
00:09:18,265 --> 00:09:21,393
Captain, we're ready for your command.
203
00:09:21,477 --> 00:09:24,772
Mm, time to take this
puppy off its leash.
204
00:09:25,373 --> 00:09:26,773
Warp speed.
205
00:09:42,998 --> 00:09:45,158
The selenium rings are
disrupting the sensors, Captain.
206
00:09:45,159 --> 00:09:46,877
I'm not detecting any Federation...
207
00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:48,462
Hold on.
208
00:09:48,545 --> 00:09:50,506
- Enemy vessel decloaking!
- Raise shields!
209
00:09:56,117 --> 00:09:58,575
Like a rat to the bait, Freeman.
210
00:09:58,639 --> 00:10:01,558
Predictable as always.
211
00:10:01,642 --> 00:10:03,727
- Who is this marauder, Captain?
- I don't know.
212
00:10:03,811 --> 00:10:07,106
I am Vindicta, vengeance personified!
213
00:10:07,189 --> 00:10:08,899
At last, Freeman.
214
00:10:08,982 --> 00:10:11,318
I will bathe in your blood.
215
00:10:11,402 --> 00:10:13,612
Oh, boy, somebody's
really laying it on thick.
216
00:10:13,695 --> 00:10:16,615
Behold my three henchmen of the apo...
217
00:10:16,698 --> 00:10:18,492
of the Vin-pocalypse.
218
00:10:18,575 --> 00:10:21,453
Tendi, my savage warrior queen
219
00:10:21,537 --> 00:10:26,250
who comes from a long line
of thieving Orion pirates.
220
00:10:26,333 --> 00:10:28,710
Yeah, nobody messes with Orions.
221
00:10:28,794 --> 00:10:31,797
I'll steal from anyone and
never give it back. Theft!
222
00:10:31,880 --> 00:10:33,298
And, uh,
223
00:10:33,382 --> 00:10:34,675
B-Bionic 5,
224
00:10:34,758 --> 00:10:37,761
half man-meat, half
robot-meat, all pain.
225
00:10:37,845 --> 00:10:39,972
100% pain.
226
00:10:40,055 --> 00:10:44,101
Tremble at the sight
of the great Vindicta!
227
00:10:44,184 --> 00:10:45,811
And Shempo.
228
00:10:45,894 --> 00:10:48,981
I'm Shempo. I was supposed
to be played by Boimler.
229
00:10:49,064 --> 00:10:50,816
Okay, come on. I don't sound like that.
230
00:10:50,899 --> 00:10:53,444
I love my captain, and I
don't want to be doing this.
231
00:10:53,527 --> 00:10:55,195
All right, that's not too far off.
232
00:10:55,279 --> 00:10:57,448
You're posing as Starfleet. Why?
233
00:10:57,531 --> 00:11:00,033
Because I do what I want!
Ugh, you're a jerk, Freeman.
234
00:11:00,117 --> 00:11:02,286
You're nothing but a
propped up errand girl,
235
00:11:02,369 --> 00:11:05,789
blindly licking Starfleet's
boot and begging for heel.
236
00:11:05,873 --> 00:11:07,875
Oh! Vindicta got your ass.
237
00:11:07,958 --> 00:11:10,335
Look, there's no need
for theatrics, all right?
238
00:11:10,419 --> 00:11:13,338
- I'm sure you're a reasonable...
- Shempo got you tea, master.
239
00:11:13,422 --> 00:11:15,674
This is coffee!
240
00:11:15,757 --> 00:11:17,509
I was Shempo.
241
00:11:17,593 --> 00:11:19,178
That poor Shempo!
242
00:11:19,261 --> 00:11:21,513
You didn't have to do that.
Are you out of your mind?
243
00:11:21,597 --> 00:11:23,724
Freeman, you disgust me.
244
00:11:23,807 --> 00:11:25,976
You're a coward who hides behind rank.
245
00:11:26,059 --> 00:11:27,352
You can't even appreciate
246
00:11:27,436 --> 00:11:29,104
your most valuable, creative thinkers.
247
00:11:29,188 --> 00:11:31,356
I am Vindicta! Today you die.
248
00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:33,525
This Vindicta is all over the place.
249
00:11:33,609 --> 00:11:35,527
"Hell is empty, and all
the devils are here.
250
00:11:35,611 --> 00:11:37,946
Our revels now are ended".
251
00:11:38,030 --> 00:11:39,990
Wait, is she quoting "The Tempest"?
252
00:11:43,619 --> 00:11:45,537
"Hell is empty, and
all the devils are...
253
00:11:45,621 --> 00:11:47,206
"Hell is empty, and all the devils
254
00:11:47,289 --> 00:11:49,249
- are here".
- Wait, this is a recording.
255
00:11:49,250 --> 00:11:50,250
It's a distraction.
256
00:11:50,292 --> 00:11:51,668
Winger?
257
00:11:51,752 --> 00:11:53,337
Hi. I'm Lieutenant Lemonts.
258
00:11:53,420 --> 00:11:55,756
Your one-man show took my breath away.
259
00:11:55,839 --> 00:11:57,174
Thank you. Thank...
260
00:12:02,971 --> 00:12:05,390
Freeman! Bring me Free...
261
00:12:06,433 --> 00:12:08,836
God, these stupid capes. So much fabric.
262
00:12:12,606 --> 00:12:15,359
Bring me Freeman, and I'll let you live.
263
00:12:15,442 --> 00:12:16,693
Never, witch!
264
00:12:18,445 --> 00:12:19,738
Wow.
265
00:12:19,821 --> 00:12:21,031
Boimler did a good job.
266
00:12:21,114 --> 00:12:22,434
Chief Lundy's accent was spot-on.
267
00:12:22,491 --> 00:12:24,243
Yeah, and the way his
face was all blotchy?
268
00:12:24,326 --> 00:12:26,745
- Wait, do you think Billups is in here?
- Eh, probably.
269
00:12:26,828 --> 00:12:29,081
So I can say whatever I want to my boss
270
00:12:29,164 --> 00:12:30,958
with no consequences?
271
00:12:33,168 --> 00:12:35,712
- Hey, wait! We have to hench!
- Tendi, come on.
272
00:12:35,796 --> 00:12:37,214
Pirate it up. Take some slaves.
273
00:12:37,297 --> 00:12:40,384
Oh, uh, you know the whole
"Orions taking slaves" thing?
274
00:12:40,467 --> 00:12:42,427
It's not something I really like to...
275
00:12:42,511 --> 00:12:44,096
Dirty Orion.
276
00:12:44,129 --> 00:12:45,129
Lundy!
277
00:12:48,392 --> 00:12:51,103
Give me Freeman!
278
00:12:51,186 --> 00:12:53,605
Attack formation Raptor.
279
00:12:53,689 --> 00:12:55,489
This isn't my first
overpowered space warlord,
280
00:12:55,524 --> 00:12:57,442
and it won't be my last.
281
00:12:59,528 --> 00:13:01,738
Ransom, you think you're better than me?
282
00:13:01,822 --> 00:13:03,782
Better at being the
captain's little dick wig.
283
00:13:03,865 --> 00:13:05,551
You can talk the talk,
but can you... Ow!
284
00:13:05,634 --> 00:13:07,802
Walk the walk! She can do both!
285
00:13:07,803 --> 00:13:09,621
- Oh, she's walkin' and talkin'.
- Sir, quick,
286
00:13:09,705 --> 00:13:11,465
what's the captain's
favorite type of cookie?
287
00:13:11,466 --> 00:13:13,500
- What?!
- Tell me before you succumb to the pain.
288
00:13:13,584 --> 00:13:14,793
If I were to bake her cookies,
289
00:13:14,876 --> 00:13:16,962
what would be my best bet?
290
00:13:17,045 --> 00:13:19,339
Cap's got a sweet tooth.
Cookies are a good move.
291
00:13:19,423 --> 00:13:21,466
I've done it myself. But watch out.
292
00:13:21,550 --> 00:13:23,468
She's allergic to...
293
00:13:24,845 --> 00:13:26,263
Allergic to what? Ransom!
294
00:13:26,346 --> 00:13:28,849
Allergic to what?!
295
00:13:28,932 --> 00:13:30,267
At your stations, people.
296
00:13:30,350 --> 00:13:31,643
This is not a drill.
297
00:13:31,727 --> 00:13:34,521
Billups! Show yourself!
298
00:13:34,605 --> 00:13:35,772
Sir, get down!
299
00:13:40,068 --> 00:13:41,111
Engineering, evacuate!
300
00:13:44,197 --> 00:13:45,949
Andy Billups!
301
00:13:46,033 --> 00:13:48,994
You think you're the best
engineer in the fleet.
302
00:13:49,077 --> 00:13:50,677
Well, I've wanted to
say something to you
303
00:13:50,746 --> 00:13:53,040
for a long time.
304
00:13:53,123 --> 00:13:54,916
You are the best engineer in the fleet!
305
00:13:55,000 --> 00:13:57,336
- Huh?
- I love how you program subroutines.
306
00:13:57,419 --> 00:13:58,503
It's breathtaking.
307
00:13:58,587 --> 00:14:00,797
It feels so good to say it.
308
00:14:00,881 --> 00:14:02,799
Warning. Hydron levels critical.
309
00:14:02,883 --> 00:14:04,343
Damn it! We don't have much time.
310
00:14:04,426 --> 00:14:06,678
Rerouting the vent system
would take a whole team.
311
00:14:06,762 --> 00:14:08,180
If we bypass the indacontrols
312
00:14:08,263 --> 00:14:09,343
and suppress the sativents,
313
00:14:09,389 --> 00:14:10,682
it should function as a...
314
00:14:10,766 --> 00:14:12,517
Rudimentary plasma filter.
315
00:14:12,601 --> 00:14:15,646
Wow, for a random space marauder,
316
00:14:15,729 --> 00:14:17,731
you really know your
way around a starship.
317
00:14:17,814 --> 00:14:19,149
Aw, thanks.
318
00:14:20,150 --> 00:14:21,902
Intruder!
319
00:14:22,903 --> 00:14:24,196
When you get to hell,
320
00:14:24,279 --> 00:14:26,198
tell the Pah-wraiths
that Shaxs sent you!
321
00:14:26,281 --> 00:14:29,034
Special delivery straight from Bajor!
322
00:14:30,077 --> 00:14:31,203
Ah, shut up.
323
00:14:39,127 --> 00:14:41,046
Borg head?
324
00:14:41,129 --> 00:14:43,423
Designation: explosive.
325
00:14:46,635 --> 00:14:48,220
Oh, look!
326
00:14:48,303 --> 00:14:50,130
Oh, Shaxs's earring.
You have to wear it.
327
00:14:50,214 --> 00:14:51,974
- Come here. Come here.
- Uh, I-I don't know.
328
00:14:51,977 --> 00:14:53,617
Isn't there, like,
religious significance?
329
00:14:53,618 --> 00:14:55,233
I mean, some of his ear's still on it.
330
00:14:55,268 --> 00:14:57,020
Come on, dude. Orions are pirates!
331
00:14:57,044 --> 00:14:58,204
Pillaging's your whole thing.
332
00:14:58,205 --> 00:15:00,899
Okay, stop! It is not my whole thing.
333
00:15:00,982 --> 00:15:03,263
And for your information, many
Orions haven't been pirates
334
00:15:03,318 --> 00:15:05,028
for over five years!
335
00:15:05,112 --> 00:15:08,240
Okay, sorry. Look, you can just
be my generic warrior henchman.
336
00:15:08,323 --> 00:15:10,409
Come on! Come on, let's
go torture the cat doctor.
337
00:15:10,492 --> 00:15:12,092
Like, really torture
the hell out of her.
338
00:15:12,093 --> 00:15:13,537
Her name is Dr. T'Ana.
339
00:15:13,620 --> 00:15:16,206
You're way too into
this. This is messed up.
340
00:15:16,289 --> 00:15:18,083
It's the holodeck. It's not real.
341
00:15:18,166 --> 00:15:20,085
Die! Die!
342
00:15:21,962 --> 00:15:24,631
What is with you today?
This is not healthy.
343
00:15:24,715 --> 00:15:25,958
- Can we stop the movie?
- No!
344
00:15:26,041 --> 00:15:27,459
No, I'm fine. This is feeling good.
345
00:15:27,496 --> 00:15:29,176
Come on, let me just
take down the captain,
346
00:15:29,177 --> 00:15:30,295
and then we can grab tacos.
347
00:15:30,378 --> 00:15:32,264
I don't want to watch
you phaser the captain.
348
00:15:32,347 --> 00:15:34,099
Phaser?
349
00:15:34,182 --> 00:15:37,310
Oh, it's going to be
way worse than that.
350
00:15:37,394 --> 00:15:39,730
I am out of here. Arch.
351
00:15:39,813 --> 00:15:41,606
Hey, come on.
352
00:15:41,690 --> 00:15:43,233
This isn't you.
353
00:15:43,316 --> 00:15:44,693
It is, too!
354
00:15:48,196 --> 00:15:50,824
Ransom. Shaxs. Anyone, come in.
355
00:15:52,659 --> 00:15:55,620
No one left to hide behind, Captain.
356
00:15:55,704 --> 00:15:58,457
It's just me and you.
357
00:15:58,540 --> 00:15:59,916
And-and these guys.
358
00:16:04,296 --> 00:16:05,672
You'll never take my ship.
359
00:16:05,756 --> 00:16:07,299
I don't want your ship.
360
00:16:07,382 --> 00:16:09,301
I want you to stop treating me
361
00:16:09,384 --> 00:16:10,844
like I'm the bad guy all the time.
362
00:16:10,927 --> 00:16:12,137
You are the bad guy.
363
00:16:12,220 --> 00:16:14,806
No, I'm not. Why don't
you ever side with me?
364
00:16:14,890 --> 00:16:16,266
I don't even know you.
365
00:16:16,349 --> 00:16:17,809
Exactly!
366
00:16:17,893 --> 00:16:20,479
Oh, my God. You're-you're crazy.
367
00:16:20,562 --> 00:16:23,356
No, this is crazy.
368
00:16:23,440 --> 00:16:25,150
Sir, her ship.
369
00:16:25,233 --> 00:16:27,360
- The warp core's gone critical.
- Brace for impact!
370
00:17:01,102 --> 00:17:02,942
Warning. Warning.
371
00:17:02,943 --> 00:17:06,530
The ship has crashed. Warning.
372
00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:14,032
Oh, damn it.
373
00:17:16,368 --> 00:17:18,870
All surviving crew, emergency
evacuation protocol:
374
00:17:18,954 --> 00:17:20,872
Delta Echo.
375
00:17:20,956 --> 00:17:23,250
I'll keep systems functional
for as long as possible.
376
00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:26,002
You can do this. We can do this.
377
00:17:26,086 --> 00:17:27,886
Cerritos strong!
378
00:17:27,887 --> 00:17:29,586
Oh, when are you going to give up
379
00:17:29,589 --> 00:17:31,716
- the "loving captain" act?
- It's not an act!
380
00:17:31,800 --> 00:17:33,593
I'm overflowing with love and affection!
381
00:17:33,677 --> 00:17:35,595
- Oh, shut up!
- You shut up!
382
00:17:37,973 --> 00:17:39,516
Sir, are you okay?
383
00:17:39,599 --> 00:17:40,892
I'll live,
384
00:17:40,976 --> 00:17:43,228
- but the rest of the crew...
- Will be fine.
385
00:17:43,311 --> 00:17:45,822
I initiated a rapid repeating
emergency transport sequence
386
00:17:45,906 --> 00:17:47,666
and beamed the entire
crew before we crashed.
387
00:17:47,750 --> 00:17:49,026
What? But that's not possible.
388
00:17:49,109 --> 00:17:51,110
No, it's a movie. You can
beam whatever you want.
389
00:17:51,111 --> 00:17:53,031
You can do all sorts of
beaming stuff in a movie!
390
00:17:53,032 --> 00:17:54,406
What?! That is amazing!
391
00:17:54,489 --> 00:17:56,700
- I learned it from you, sir.
- Uh... okay.
392
00:18:05,876 --> 00:18:07,752
What is your problem?!
393
00:18:07,836 --> 00:18:09,421
You've been a jerk since I was eight!
394
00:18:09,504 --> 00:18:11,548
Why do you have to be so hard on me?!
395
00:18:11,631 --> 00:18:13,592
What? I don't know you!
396
00:18:39,618 --> 00:18:42,746
Get off my mom, you bitch.
397
00:18:42,829 --> 00:18:45,624
Oh! Wait. What?
398
00:18:45,707 --> 00:18:48,335
You simulated me in
here, too? Not cool, man!
399
00:18:48,418 --> 00:18:50,629
I got private stuff in those logs!
400
00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:53,298
Emergency transport on signal now!
401
00:18:53,381 --> 00:18:54,674
Beckett, no!
402
00:18:56,217 --> 00:18:57,969
Oh, great. Well, now it's just us.
403
00:18:58,053 --> 00:19:00,053
Yeah, thanks for ruining
the awesome captain-murder
404
00:19:00,054 --> 00:19:01,473
this was all building to.
405
00:19:01,556 --> 00:19:03,934
We were supposed to fight
on a rickety metal catwalk.
406
00:19:04,017 --> 00:19:05,697
Oh. Let me make it up
to you. Double punch!
407
00:19:05,698 --> 00:19:07,354
Double block.
408
00:19:07,437 --> 00:19:09,522
- Whoa. How did you...?
- I know all your moves
409
00:19:09,606 --> 00:19:11,441
and everything about you.
410
00:19:11,524 --> 00:19:13,818
I know you dressed up like
Toby Targ every Halloween,
411
00:19:13,902 --> 00:19:17,989
even when you were too old.
412
00:19:18,073 --> 00:19:20,450
And I know you actually
love the warp core!
413
00:19:20,533 --> 00:19:22,243
Take that back. The warp core's lame!
414
00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:26,665
You only break rules because you know
415
00:19:26,748 --> 00:19:29,501
that's what everyone expects you to do!
416
00:19:29,584 --> 00:19:30,877
If you really were a badass,
417
00:19:30,961 --> 00:19:32,671
you'd do the hard thing and just be
418
00:19:32,754 --> 00:19:34,172
a good officer.
419
00:19:37,258 --> 00:19:39,970
They're not casting you
as the villain. You are!
420
00:19:46,267 --> 00:19:49,062
Hey, I know you might be
a psychotic space raider
421
00:19:49,145 --> 00:19:51,022
whose boss just destroyed my ship,
422
00:19:51,106 --> 00:19:53,984
but you... are all right in my book.
423
00:19:54,067 --> 00:19:56,778
That's a book I'd read cover to cover.
424
00:19:56,861 --> 00:19:59,864
Sir, you're the only person
who can see past my mask,
425
00:19:59,948 --> 00:20:01,866
and knows deep down, I just want
426
00:20:01,950 --> 00:20:04,428
to replace a toranium ops
module with ionizing subcircuits.
427
00:20:04,511 --> 00:20:07,121
I know this is crazy, but do you
want to just... I don't know...
428
00:20:07,122 --> 00:20:09,042
run away together, and
we could get our own ship,
429
00:20:09,124 --> 00:20:11,044
and we can buffer the phase
coil whenever we want
430
00:20:11,045 --> 00:20:13,253
or... or realign the matrix.
431
00:20:13,336 --> 00:20:16,589
We can fix the warp engines on our time.
432
00:20:16,673 --> 00:20:18,425
It would be an honor, sir.
433
00:20:19,676 --> 00:20:22,888
Godspeed, you crazy [BLEEP].
434
00:20:22,971 --> 00:20:25,064
Ugh. Cap'n, I know you've
been through a lot today,
435
00:20:25,065 --> 00:20:27,141
but I made you a platter
of chocolate chip cookies,
436
00:20:27,142 --> 00:20:29,302
and I just want to know what
you think before I give it
437
00:20:29,303 --> 00:20:31,297
to the real you in real
life, so if you could...
438
00:20:31,298 --> 00:20:33,550
The captain's allergic
to chocolate. Assassin!
439
00:20:34,649 --> 00:20:36,109
Great work, Jet!
440
00:20:36,192 --> 00:20:37,632
That's the kind of assassin-tackling
441
00:20:37,652 --> 00:20:39,112
that'll land you a promotion.
442
00:20:39,195 --> 00:20:40,572
Oh, hell yeah, Jet!
443
00:20:40,655 --> 00:20:42,455
Wait, wait. Cap'n, Cap'n,
where do you want me
444
00:20:42,456 --> 00:20:43,650
to see myself in five years?
445
00:20:43,734 --> 00:20:45,784
Don't answer that, Captain.
He's playing mind games!
446
00:20:45,785 --> 00:20:46,870
You're the man, Jet.
447
00:20:46,953 --> 00:20:48,538
- Get him out of here.
- Let's go.
448
00:20:48,621 --> 00:20:50,081
How can I be the man, Cap'n?
449
00:20:50,165 --> 00:20:51,583
I want to be the man!
450
00:21:00,925 --> 00:21:02,635
That's it. Keep up the act.
451
00:21:02,719 --> 00:21:05,263
Oh, you know so much about me,
452
00:21:05,346 --> 00:21:07,932
but you missed one big thing.
453
00:21:08,016 --> 00:21:10,894
Oh, yeah, here we go... time
for one of your snarky jokes.
454
00:21:10,977 --> 00:21:12,937
Yeah, I may hate protocol,
455
00:21:13,021 --> 00:21:15,148
but I don't hate this ship.
456
00:21:15,231 --> 00:21:17,231
I don't hate the crew. I
work with my best friends.
457
00:21:17,232 --> 00:21:19,944
The captain's my mom. I
would do anything for her.
458
00:21:20,028 --> 00:21:21,613
Oh, come on. No, you hate the captain.
459
00:21:21,696 --> 00:21:23,114
You complain about her nonstop.
460
00:21:23,198 --> 00:21:24,574
It's like your whole thing!
461
00:21:24,657 --> 00:21:26,409
Yeah, I mean, she's hard on me, right?
462
00:21:26,493 --> 00:21:28,253
She's the captain, and
I'm a pain in the ass.
463
00:21:28,328 --> 00:21:29,848
But if she kicked me off the Cerritos,
464
00:21:29,871 --> 00:21:31,581
I would be done in Starfleet.
465
00:21:31,664 --> 00:21:33,917
She's watching out for me
the only way she knows how:
466
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:36,127
in a [BLEEP] up, overbearing, mom way.
467
00:21:36,211 --> 00:21:38,630
Oh, please. The only person
you care about is yourself.
468
00:21:41,174 --> 00:21:42,974
Okay, well, then why
did I let you kick my ass
469
00:21:43,051 --> 00:21:44,771
to buy time for everyone
to get off the ship
470
00:21:44,772 --> 00:21:47,472
before the self-destruct timer went off?
471
00:21:47,555 --> 00:21:49,849
Wait. What?
472
00:21:54,229 --> 00:21:57,148
No, no, no, no. No, no, no! Aah!
473
00:21:57,232 --> 00:21:59,275
No!
474
00:22:02,904 --> 00:22:05,657
Wow. I can't believe I just
got my ass kicked by myself
475
00:22:05,740 --> 00:22:07,325
and just... Wait.
476
00:22:07,408 --> 00:22:09,008
I guess I like working
on the ship and...
477
00:22:09,035 --> 00:22:12,205
Oh, my God. Therapy works.
Guys, therapy works!
478
00:22:15,542 --> 00:22:17,669
Honestly, that was way more therapeutic
479
00:22:17,752 --> 00:22:19,752
than I thought it would be.
I worked through a lot.
480
00:22:19,753 --> 00:22:21,548
I feel great, too. I just wish
481
00:22:21,631 --> 00:22:23,631
I could tell the real Billups
how I feel about him.
482
00:22:23,632 --> 00:22:25,175
Why don't you, man? He's right there.
483
00:22:25,259 --> 00:22:27,220
Nah, I wouldn't want
to bother him. I mean,
484
00:22:27,303 --> 00:22:32,183
look at him. Dude's a stone-cold badass.
485
00:22:32,267 --> 00:22:34,978
Hey, T. I owe you an apology.
486
00:22:35,061 --> 00:22:37,063
The whole Orions-pirate thing.
487
00:22:37,147 --> 00:22:39,524
I-I feel really bad. I'm sorry
if I put you in a weird spot.
488
00:22:39,607 --> 00:22:42,026
Thanks. I appreciate
it, and the truth is,
489
00:22:42,110 --> 00:22:44,737
a lot of Orions are
capitalist, hyper-libertarian,
490
00:22:44,821 --> 00:22:47,031
gangster pirates, just not this one.
491
00:22:47,115 --> 00:22:48,715
- That's why I'm here.
- Oh, well, thanks
492
00:22:48,741 --> 00:22:50,743
for having my back in
there. I owe you one.
493
00:22:50,827 --> 00:22:52,871
Um, so, do you want to maybe go sit
494
00:22:52,954 --> 00:22:54,314
and look at the warp core with me?
495
00:22:54,330 --> 00:22:56,332
Wow, so lame. Yes. Let's do it.
496
00:22:56,416 --> 00:22:58,835
We talking warp core? Ooh, baby, I'm in.
497
00:23:02,797 --> 00:23:05,425
- Mariner.
- Hey, Cap. Sorry about earlier today.
498
00:23:05,508 --> 00:23:07,719
I was way out of line.
Thanks for looking out.
499
00:23:08,761 --> 00:23:09,971
Later, skater.
500
00:23:11,806 --> 00:23:14,225
"Later skater"? I know
she's up to something!
501
00:23:14,309 --> 00:23:15,560
What did she tell you?
502
00:23:15,643 --> 00:23:17,187
Captain, you know I can't share
503
00:23:17,270 --> 00:23:18,563
what your crew tells me.
504
00:23:18,646 --> 00:23:20,565
That'd be a real ethical pickle.
505
00:23:20,624 --> 00:23:22,024
What?! If she's planning something,
506
00:23:22,025 --> 00:23:23,943
- I have a right to know.
- Carol,
507
00:23:24,027 --> 00:23:25,570
you're being a pineapple right now.
508
00:23:25,653 --> 00:23:28,406
Ugh! Stop referencing foods!
509
00:23:29,666 --> 00:23:31,592
Okay. No more distractions.
I just need to know
510
00:23:31,593 --> 00:23:33,452
what to wear to the interview.
511
00:23:33,453 --> 00:23:34,973
Computer, continue program.
512
00:23:34,974 --> 00:23:36,536
Hey, Cap'n, do you like turtlenecks
513
00:23:36,539 --> 00:23:38,820
- or just standard uniform?
- Against insurmountable odds.
514
00:23:38,833 --> 00:23:40,953
Oh, sorry. You got something
going on here. I'll wait.
515
00:23:40,954 --> 00:23:43,254
As captain, it was an
honor serving beside her.
516
00:23:43,338 --> 00:23:46,758
As a mother, it was a privilege
to call Mariner my daughter.
517
00:23:46,841 --> 00:23:48,885
- Wait. What?
- That's right.
518
00:23:48,968 --> 00:23:50,637
Mariner was my daughter the whole time.
519
00:23:50,720 --> 00:23:52,764
It's a secret we didn't
want anyone to know.
520
00:23:52,847 --> 00:23:54,727
- Uh, uh...
- And if someone had ever
521
00:23:54,730 --> 00:23:55,970
found out she was my baby girl,
522
00:23:56,023 --> 00:23:57,619
I don't know what I would have done.
523
00:23:57,702 --> 00:23:59,196
Probably kicked them off the ship,
524
00:23:59,279 --> 00:24:01,655
maybe even court-martialed
them right out of Starfleet.
525
00:24:01,656 --> 00:24:03,274
I was being crazy.
526
00:24:03,358 --> 00:24:04,776
Thank goodness
527
00:24:04,859 --> 00:24:07,111
- nobody ever found out.
- Computer, end program!
528
00:24:09,822 --> 00:24:11,783
Ooh!
529
00:24:11,866 --> 00:24:13,906
Hey, nerd, we're going to
go stare at the warp core.
530
00:24:13,907 --> 00:24:15,453
You want to...? Whoa. You okay?
531
00:24:15,536 --> 00:24:17,956
- Yeah.
- All right, whatevs. Hey.
532
00:24:18,039 --> 00:24:20,079
Good luck with the interview.
You're gonna do great.
533
00:24:23,002 --> 00:24:24,482
So, you're interested
534
00:24:24,483 --> 00:24:26,152
in the advanced diplomacy workshop.
535
00:24:26,172 --> 00:24:28,800
Where do you see yourself
negotiating peace in five years?
536
00:24:28,883 --> 00:24:30,802
I... uh...
537
00:24:30,885 --> 00:24:33,763
Just take a breath and say the
first thing that comes to mind.
538
00:24:33,846 --> 00:24:35,473
- Mariner.
- Mariner what?!
539
00:24:35,556 --> 00:24:38,476
- Uh... is hot?
- Excuse me?!
540
00:24:38,559 --> 00:24:41,646
Uh, I don't know! She's
not hot! She's nasty!
541
00:24:45,441 --> 00:24:49,862
Ensign Boimler didn't bother to
prepare for interview. Terrible.
542
00:25:02,250 --> 00:25:04,627
Revenge!
543
00:25:04,711 --> 00:25:06,504
Not-a today.
544
00:25:06,587 --> 00:25:09,799
Not-a on-a da Vinci's watch.
545
00:26:07,316 --> 00:26:13,316
Sync & corrections by Costa Dax
www.addic7ed.com
546
00:27:00,104 --> 00:27:02,264
Pew, pew, pew, pew, pew.
547
00:27:03,914 --> 00:27:04,914
Chirp.
40632
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