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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,195 --> 00:00:05,046 sync and correction by solfieri www.addic7ed.com 2 00:00:10,502 --> 00:00:13,101 Togetherness - 01x02 Handcuffs 3 00:00:25,694 --> 00:00:27,995 Oh shit. 4 00:00:41,593 --> 00:00:43,927 Real coyotes. 5 00:00:43,928 --> 00:00:45,379 Fuck yeah! 6 00:01:01,896 --> 00:01:03,113 Hi. 7 00:01:15,660 --> 00:01:18,072 ♪ Another name ♪ 8 00:01:18,074 --> 00:01:21,382 ♪ Stay alive or stay the same ♪ 9 00:01:21,383 --> 00:01:23,752 ♪ It's a stupid game ♪ 10 00:01:23,753 --> 00:01:25,302 ♪ Stupid game ♪ 11 00:01:25,303 --> 00:01:29,089 ♪ Well, I don't care if you don't ♪ 12 00:01:29,090 --> 00:01:32,009 ♪ Well, I don't feel if you don't... ♪ 13 00:01:33,094 --> 00:01:36,680 ♪ Well, I don't want it if you don't ♪ 14 00:01:36,681 --> 00:01:40,317 ♪ Well, I won't play it if you won't play it... ♪ 15 00:01:40,318 --> 00:01:43,654 ♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh ♪ 16 00:01:43,655 --> 00:01:47,107 ♪ Let's go to bed ♪ 17 00:01:48,076 --> 00:01:50,278 ♪ Oh, oh, oh... ♪ 18 00:01:52,781 --> 00:01:54,331 ♪ Go to bed... ♪ 19 00:01:54,332 --> 00:01:57,284 - What is going on here? - Ah, fuck! 20 00:01:57,285 --> 00:01:59,203 Jesus fuck. 21 00:01:59,204 --> 00:02:00,788 Are those pantyhose? 22 00:02:00,789 --> 00:02:02,756 - Y-yeah. - Who wears pantyhose? 23 00:02:02,757 --> 00:02:04,208 Kate fucking Middleton. 24 00:02:04,209 --> 00:02:06,043 - Can you just... can you... - Hey, little dude. 25 00:02:06,044 --> 00:02:07,928 Tina, just... I'm... 26 00:02:07,929 --> 00:02:10,347 - As you were. - Fucking knock. 27 00:02:10,348 --> 00:02:12,549 You wanna eat your Cheerios? 28 00:02:20,225 --> 00:02:22,059 Mmm, that's good. 29 00:02:22,060 --> 00:02:24,812 God! Get off my plate. 30 00:02:24,813 --> 00:02:27,148 Don't eat my stuff, don't be in my shit 31 00:02:27,149 --> 00:02:30,150 every second. Barging in on me... 32 00:02:30,151 --> 00:02:33,620 Brett barging in and the kids are fucking all over me. 33 00:02:33,621 --> 00:02:35,490 I'm gonna get a fucking lock and put it on my door. 34 00:02:35,491 --> 00:02:36,740 Okay, okay. 35 00:02:37,826 --> 00:02:39,293 You need to get laid. 36 00:02:40,245 --> 00:02:42,163 - That's a horrible idea. - Why? 37 00:02:42,164 --> 00:02:44,833 It's that every part of my life is just, like, 38 00:02:44,834 --> 00:02:47,384 I know what it's gonna look like. 39 00:02:47,385 --> 00:02:50,171 Every day I wake up, I know what the day is gonna be like. 40 00:02:50,172 --> 00:02:52,723 Brett and I have sex, I know what the sex is gonna be like. 41 00:02:52,724 --> 00:02:55,008 - Really? - Yeah. It's kissing, 42 00:02:55,009 --> 00:02:58,245 neck kissing, boob grab, genital touching, 43 00:02:58,246 --> 00:03:00,681 - get the pillow, and then... - "Get the pillow"? 44 00:03:01,733 --> 00:03:03,100 Yeah, I said that like it's a thing. 45 00:03:03,101 --> 00:03:05,235 What the fuck is "get the pillow"? 46 00:03:05,236 --> 00:03:07,321 I feel bad, I feel like I'm betraying a confidence. 47 00:03:07,322 --> 00:03:09,840 I'm just your sister. What is "get the pillow"? 48 00:03:09,841 --> 00:03:11,859 - I need to know what "get the pillow" is. - Okay, he... when he... 49 00:03:11,860 --> 00:03:13,695 when he is ready... 50 00:03:13,696 --> 00:03:15,362 To come? 51 00:03:16,247 --> 00:03:17,664 No, to... to... 52 00:03:17,665 --> 00:03:19,700 put his... dick inside me. 53 00:03:19,701 --> 00:03:21,001 Uh-huh. 54 00:03:21,002 --> 00:03:23,170 He's like, "Let me get the pillow." 55 00:03:23,171 --> 00:03:25,839 "I'll get you the pillow." 56 00:03:25,840 --> 00:03:28,375 like... and every time I'm like, 57 00:03:28,376 --> 00:03:30,093 - "Oh, okay." - That is rough. 58 00:03:30,094 --> 00:03:32,881 It's to put under my head so that my head isn't banging around. 59 00:03:32,882 --> 00:03:34,515 I want my fucking head to bang around. 60 00:03:34,516 --> 00:03:36,099 I know, you're like, "Bang my fucking head, 61 00:03:36,100 --> 00:03:37,801 - "you fucking puss." - Fucking knock me out! 62 00:03:37,802 --> 00:03:40,471 - Please. - I totally agree. 63 00:03:40,472 --> 00:03:44,358 Okay, what are your fantasies? 64 00:03:44,359 --> 00:03:47,444 Like, if you could do whatever you want, what would you do to Brett? 65 00:03:48,563 --> 00:03:50,147 I guess it would be like... just, like... 66 00:03:50,148 --> 00:03:52,566 to just shake him out of it, you know? 67 00:03:52,567 --> 00:03:53,568 Yeah, yeah. 68 00:03:53,569 --> 00:03:56,453 - Like, make him lose control. - Right on. 69 00:03:56,454 --> 00:03:58,288 'Cause he's so, like, rigid. 70 00:03:58,289 --> 00:03:59,740 None of my business, but totally agree. 71 00:03:59,741 --> 00:04:02,142 - What else? - I wanna scare him 72 00:04:02,143 --> 00:04:03,660 and ruffle his feathers. 73 00:04:03,661 --> 00:04:05,229 - You know, like... - Yes, yes. 74 00:04:05,230 --> 00:04:08,215 I want it to be just, like, spontaneous 75 00:04:08,216 --> 00:04:11,252 and crazy, and being pinned down 76 00:04:11,253 --> 00:04:12,503 and pinning him down. 77 00:04:12,504 --> 00:04:13,720 Yeah, yeah, yeah! 78 00:04:13,721 --> 00:04:16,256 Like, fucking... just wanna punch him in the face. 79 00:04:17,175 --> 00:04:19,092 I'm sorry. 80 00:04:20,094 --> 00:04:21,311 Not... I think this is great! 81 00:04:21,312 --> 00:04:23,680 No, no, I didn't mean to laugh. 82 00:04:23,681 --> 00:04:26,400 - Can I tell you something? - I'm sorry that I just told you that. 83 00:04:26,401 --> 00:04:27,985 No, that's what you have to do. 84 00:04:28,707 --> 00:04:30,404 I mean, you don't have to beat him up, 85 00:04:30,405 --> 00:04:32,523 - but that's what you have to do. - I think he would laugh. 86 00:04:32,524 --> 00:04:34,074 I think he would be like, "What are you doing?" 87 00:04:34,075 --> 00:04:36,610 So fucking make him stop laughing. 88 00:04:38,446 --> 00:04:39,913 So you gotta do it. 89 00:04:39,914 --> 00:04:43,083 Tonight I will take the kids... pizza and ice cream. 90 00:04:43,084 --> 00:04:44,618 And you guys will have the house to yourselves. 91 00:04:44,619 --> 00:04:46,837 That's like... 92 00:04:46,838 --> 00:04:48,255 really soon. 93 00:04:49,290 --> 00:04:50,507 Yeah. 94 00:04:52,794 --> 00:04:55,295 Boy, have we got a surprise for Daddy! 95 00:04:55,296 --> 00:04:57,264 He's not gonna know what hit him. 96 00:04:57,265 --> 00:04:58,632 Literally. 97 00:05:11,896 --> 00:05:14,816 See, I'm not scared of the Canyon Killer. 98 00:05:14,817 --> 00:05:17,985 But people texting and driving... 99 00:05:17,986 --> 00:05:19,403 now that scares me. 100 00:05:19,404 --> 00:05:21,204 That bothers me more than anything. 101 00:05:22,490 --> 00:05:23,907 You all right? I'm gonna give you my jacket. 102 00:05:23,908 --> 00:05:26,076 It's really cold out here. 103 00:05:26,077 --> 00:05:27,744 - Here you go. - Thank you. 104 00:05:34,886 --> 00:05:36,169 It's great, it's great. 105 00:05:36,170 --> 00:05:37,421 I know this is hard, 106 00:05:37,422 --> 00:05:39,340 but you have to try and remember something. 107 00:05:39,341 --> 00:05:41,341 Do you think the nightmares are just gonna stop? 108 00:05:43,811 --> 00:05:46,063 Whoa, what was that? 109 00:05:46,064 --> 00:05:47,347 Hmm? 110 00:05:47,348 --> 00:05:49,182 That sound. What was that sound? 111 00:05:49,183 --> 00:05:50,651 You mean the coyotes? 112 00:05:50,652 --> 00:05:53,770 What happened to the coyotes that we had before? 113 00:05:53,771 --> 00:05:55,689 Well, technically, that sound wasn't a coyote. 114 00:05:55,690 --> 00:05:57,324 It was an Alaskan wolf. 115 00:05:57,325 --> 00:06:00,360 And I actually went out and I recorded coyotes, 116 00:06:00,361 --> 00:06:01,828 so those are real coyotes. 117 00:06:01,829 --> 00:06:05,664 I seriously doubt that that's what an actual coyote sounds like. 118 00:06:06,534 --> 00:06:08,802 It's fine, let's just go back to the other one. 119 00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:12,456 I mean, just to be clear, that was... that was a coyote. 120 00:06:12,457 --> 00:06:14,374 Like, if there's something texturally you want different, 121 00:06:14,375 --> 00:06:15,759 but that other sound was a wolf, 122 00:06:15,760 --> 00:06:18,045 which is not a Southern California thing at all. 123 00:06:18,046 --> 00:06:21,632 So... if you want that, that's fine, but it would be factually inaccurate, 124 00:06:21,633 --> 00:06:24,134 you know, for the area. 125 00:06:24,136 --> 00:06:25,888 We can go back to the previous take. No problem. 126 00:06:25,888 --> 00:06:28,355 Nah, it's okay. What was your name? 127 00:06:31,799 --> 00:06:34,016 - Brett. - Right, Brett. 128 00:06:36,147 --> 00:06:37,481 I appreciate your research. 129 00:06:38,733 --> 00:06:41,535 I respect the hell out of your sonic acumen, 130 00:06:42,704 --> 00:06:44,321 but your coyotes sound fucking stupid. 131 00:06:46,157 --> 00:06:48,325 Come on, Philip, let's take it back. 132 00:06:48,326 --> 00:06:51,461 Okay. Back to one. 133 00:06:51,462 --> 00:06:53,797 See, I'm not scared of the Canyon Killer. 134 00:06:53,798 --> 00:06:56,667 But people texting and driving... 135 00:07:02,090 --> 00:07:04,258 Okay, I'm just going to put the baby down. 136 00:07:04,259 --> 00:07:05,475 'Kay. Okay. 137 00:07:21,242 --> 00:07:23,443 Yoo-hoo. 138 00:07:24,328 --> 00:07:26,446 Alex, time to get up. 139 00:07:29,117 --> 00:07:32,002 I have some life insurance. 140 00:07:32,003 --> 00:07:33,837 $15,000 policy. 141 00:07:38,259 --> 00:07:39,760 Alex, come on. 142 00:07:39,761 --> 00:07:42,179 - Al-ex. - I'm sleeping. 143 00:07:42,180 --> 00:07:45,031 I'm sorry, what? Do you see this? 144 00:07:45,032 --> 00:07:47,267 - Look at this. Look at this. - Yeah. 145 00:07:47,268 --> 00:07:48,852 - Eh, don't worry. - No, no, no, no, no, no. 146 00:07:48,853 --> 00:07:51,521 Don't... don't clean up for him. Are you kidding me? 147 00:07:51,522 --> 00:07:53,474 He's having such a hard time and we just... 148 00:07:53,475 --> 00:07:56,393 I know he's going through a hard time, but this is not the way to deal with it. 149 00:07:56,394 --> 00:07:58,278 - Yes, it is. - He needs to get up, get outside, 150 00:07:58,279 --> 00:07:59,814 - and go on an audition. - This has happened before. 151 00:07:59,815 --> 00:08:01,314 He goes on auditions. 152 00:08:01,315 --> 00:08:03,317 - What? - They're for depressing commercials, 153 00:08:03,318 --> 00:08:06,203 where he's gonna play a hot-dog vendor 154 00:08:06,204 --> 00:08:07,537 or a hemorrhoid. 155 00:08:07,538 --> 00:08:10,373 Do you wanna play someone's ass problem? No. 156 00:08:10,374 --> 00:08:12,793 If it's gonna pay me, I'll frickin' do anything. 157 00:08:12,794 --> 00:08:15,245 You should be kicking him out of your couch... 158 00:08:15,246 --> 00:08:16,913 No no, I should not be... and out of your house. 159 00:08:16,914 --> 00:08:19,716 Because it's like a beached whale situation. 160 00:08:19,717 --> 00:08:21,836 Okay? You just have to wait for the tide to come 161 00:08:21,837 --> 00:08:24,554 and gently wash him back in. 162 00:08:32,096 --> 00:08:33,980 Why do you even care so much? 163 00:08:33,981 --> 00:08:35,432 Because he's bugging me. 164 00:08:43,024 --> 00:08:45,692 - No. No. - Yes. Yes. 165 00:08:46,577 --> 00:08:47,994 No. 166 00:08:50,199 --> 00:08:51,364 Motherfucker! 167 00:08:51,365 --> 00:08:52,949 Now that was for your own good. 168 00:08:54,001 --> 00:08:55,418 Who the fuck do you think you are? 169 00:08:55,419 --> 00:08:57,872 Tried the nice way. What makes you think you can just come in here 170 00:08:57,873 --> 00:08:59,756 - and do that? - I need somebody to help me 171 00:08:59,757 --> 00:09:01,458 with my party-supply business. 172 00:09:01,459 --> 00:09:03,543 You're saying that you need help from me, 173 00:09:03,544 --> 00:09:06,546 so you decided to douse me with freezing-cold ice water? 174 00:09:06,547 --> 00:09:07,881 Come on. Up and at 'em. 175 00:09:07,882 --> 00:09:09,366 Let's get you bathed. 176 00:09:09,367 --> 00:09:10,951 Let's get you clothed. 177 00:09:10,952 --> 00:09:12,769 Let's get you out the door and in my car. 178 00:09:12,770 --> 00:09:14,722 Come on. I'm actually glad you did that. 179 00:09:14,723 --> 00:09:16,773 Let's go, come on. 180 00:09:16,774 --> 00:09:19,309 Because now I owe you one. 181 00:09:19,310 --> 00:09:21,394 I can't wait. And you're not gonna know when it hits you. 182 00:09:21,395 --> 00:09:23,697 - Come on, let's go. - There's literally nothing you can do 183 00:09:23,698 --> 00:09:25,982 to make me help you today. 184 00:09:28,486 --> 00:09:29,903 What if I show you my boobs? 185 00:09:31,460 --> 00:09:33,461 - What? - You heard me. 186 00:09:36,494 --> 00:09:38,662 - Are you serious? - Yes, I'm dead serious. 187 00:09:40,498 --> 00:09:43,633 Okay, like, how would it work? How long? 188 00:09:43,634 --> 00:09:46,586 You know, flash 'em. Mardi Gras style. 189 00:09:49,340 --> 00:09:51,091 Just like, "Throw me something, mister," and then down? 190 00:09:51,092 --> 00:09:53,261 Throw you something, mister, and then down. 191 00:09:53,262 --> 00:09:56,597 Okay, but it would need to be more than just a Mardi Gras flash. 192 00:09:56,598 --> 00:09:59,100 Do you wanna get a couple lawyers involved or do you want to see my tits? 193 00:09:59,101 --> 00:10:00,901 No, no, no, no, no. I like where we're headed. 194 00:10:00,902 --> 00:10:05,071 I'm just saying, the duration of the boob exposure 195 00:10:05,072 --> 00:10:07,073 needs to be, like, five seconds. 196 00:10:07,074 --> 00:10:08,608 Four. 197 00:10:08,609 --> 00:10:11,161 - Four Mississippi? - Three apple. 198 00:10:11,162 --> 00:10:13,530 - How about we do three Mississippi? - Done. 199 00:10:14,866 --> 00:10:17,667 Okay. Shit. 200 00:10:19,503 --> 00:10:21,037 - Are you ready? - Yeah, I'm ready. 201 00:10:21,038 --> 00:10:23,291 - Are you sure? Okay. - Go for it. 202 00:10:25,543 --> 00:10:27,795 One Mississippi. 203 00:10:27,796 --> 00:10:29,930 Two Mississippi. 204 00:10:29,931 --> 00:10:32,098 Come on, come on, come on. Don't look at my face! 205 00:10:32,099 --> 00:10:34,434 - Oh, Tina! - That's interference. 206 00:10:34,435 --> 00:10:36,937 We start over. I get at least one more Mississippi on that. 207 00:10:36,939 --> 00:10:38,856 No fuckin' way... Okay, one Mississippi. 208 00:10:41,726 --> 00:10:43,310 Brett? 209 00:10:43,311 --> 00:10:44,478 Yeah? 210 00:10:44,479 --> 00:10:46,863 I don't know how to say this, 211 00:10:46,864 --> 00:10:48,615 other than... 212 00:10:48,616 --> 00:10:52,653 can you please not argue with the director repeatedly? 213 00:10:52,654 --> 00:10:55,655 Phil, I'm not trying to argue with the guy. 214 00:10:55,656 --> 00:10:58,792 He's gonna look like an idiot with a wolf in his movie. 215 00:10:58,793 --> 00:11:01,544 - I'm trying to help him. - He doesn't give a shit. 216 00:11:02,663 --> 00:11:04,247 And neither should you. 217 00:11:04,248 --> 00:11:07,668 We're working on a stupid-ass, mind-numbing show 218 00:11:07,669 --> 00:11:09,386 with a limited time frame 219 00:11:09,387 --> 00:11:12,889 and a fuckin' tree full of assholes. 220 00:11:14,225 --> 00:11:15,642 Wait, can you please not throw those... 221 00:11:15,643 --> 00:11:17,594 - Can you let that go? - They just throw things away. 222 00:11:17,595 --> 00:11:21,231 - I mean, who do... - Yeah, that's just the way things are. 223 00:11:21,232 --> 00:11:23,516 All right, I get it. All right. 224 00:11:23,517 --> 00:11:25,352 I will, um... 225 00:11:25,353 --> 00:11:28,571 I'll take a timeout in, like, the... 226 00:11:28,572 --> 00:11:30,907 the sound booth... the penalty box over here 227 00:11:30,908 --> 00:11:32,609 for the second half of the day and... 228 00:11:32,610 --> 00:11:35,445 They actually asked that you not be on the sound stage for the second half. 229 00:11:35,446 --> 00:11:37,530 So, yeah, sound booth is good. 230 00:12:17,572 --> 00:12:18,872 - Hi. - Hi. 231 00:12:18,873 --> 00:12:21,075 - Find everything okay? - I did. Thank you. 232 00:12:21,076 --> 00:12:23,411 - Anything else? - Nope, just... 233 00:12:23,412 --> 00:12:24,961 - the lock. - Okay. 234 00:12:24,962 --> 00:12:28,465 Can you get this and the Beverly Hills sign in at the same time? 235 00:12:28,466 --> 00:12:30,417 Okay, yeah. 236 00:12:30,418 --> 00:12:32,969 My god, this is gonna go on my fridge! Yes! 237 00:12:32,970 --> 00:12:34,587 Yay! Holy shit! 238 00:13:04,452 --> 00:13:05,952 Oh god. 239 00:13:05,953 --> 00:13:07,787 I miss everything. 240 00:13:07,788 --> 00:13:09,005 - You know what I mean? - What? 241 00:13:09,006 --> 00:13:10,924 - All sports. - For real, what were you good at? 242 00:13:10,925 --> 00:13:12,509 - Football, baseball, basketball. - Really? 243 00:13:12,510 --> 00:13:14,628 - President of my school. - Were you president of your school? 244 00:13:14,629 --> 00:13:15,795 The lead in all the plays. 245 00:13:15,796 --> 00:13:17,465 You were president of your school? 246 00:13:17,466 --> 00:13:19,300 Remember the Billie Jean video with Michael Jackson? 247 00:13:19,301 --> 00:13:24,054 Like, literally I would walk and the sidewalk would just light up, 248 00:13:24,055 --> 00:13:25,055 like, gold light. 249 00:13:25,056 --> 00:13:27,141 And girls were just like, "Oh, wow." 250 00:13:27,142 --> 00:13:29,559 - What were they like? - They were just like, "Oh, wow." 251 00:13:29,560 --> 00:13:31,311 These things happened. 252 00:13:31,312 --> 00:13:33,147 Why is this so hard for you to believe? 253 00:13:33,148 --> 00:13:35,482 Can I ask you a really super personal question? 254 00:13:36,784 --> 00:13:38,068 Yeah, sure. 255 00:13:38,069 --> 00:13:39,402 Do you ever think about... 256 00:13:41,489 --> 00:13:43,239 doing something with your hair? 257 00:13:47,294 --> 00:13:50,498 I'm just... I don't mean to make you uncomfortable, I'm just asking... 258 00:13:50,499 --> 00:13:53,666 because there are, like, a couple of separate areas. 259 00:13:53,667 --> 00:13:55,502 I just feel like this one... 260 00:13:55,503 --> 00:13:57,170 maybe should go. 261 00:13:57,171 --> 00:13:58,922 Yeah, well I refer to this as my island. 262 00:13:58,923 --> 00:14:00,390 This is Gilligan's Island. 263 00:14:00,391 --> 00:14:03,977 It just kinda... it looks like a comma. 264 00:14:03,978 --> 00:14:07,981 Really, I mean this... You're laughing at the fact that I'm follicularly challenged? 265 00:14:07,982 --> 00:14:09,849 "Follicularly challenged"? 266 00:14:09,850 --> 00:14:12,352 See, it's shit like that is the reason you're not getting laid. 267 00:14:31,038 --> 00:14:32,505 Hey. 268 00:14:34,708 --> 00:14:36,209 Where you going? You going out? 269 00:14:37,878 --> 00:14:39,129 No. 270 00:14:39,130 --> 00:14:41,047 Why are you all dressed up? What's going on? No. 271 00:14:43,601 --> 00:14:45,385 I made you a drink. 272 00:14:46,971 --> 00:14:49,722 - Where is everybody? - They are gone. 273 00:14:49,723 --> 00:14:52,642 And we are going to... 274 00:14:52,643 --> 00:14:54,656 try something different. 275 00:14:55,362 --> 00:14:56,729 Well, okay. 276 00:14:56,730 --> 00:14:59,400 This is a nice... 277 00:14:59,401 --> 00:15:00,533 surprise. 278 00:15:00,534 --> 00:15:02,402 Um... 279 00:15:02,403 --> 00:15:04,154 have you had dinner yet? 280 00:15:04,155 --> 00:15:06,907 - No. We're not going to... - Good, 'cause I'm starving. 281 00:15:06,908 --> 00:15:08,541 We're not gonna talk about food. 282 00:15:08,542 --> 00:15:10,293 Can I just, like, grab a sandwich or something? 283 00:15:10,294 --> 00:15:12,212 No. No talking. 284 00:15:13,497 --> 00:15:15,165 - Like a snack? - No more talking. 285 00:15:16,500 --> 00:15:18,885 Right now, you're gonna take a sip of that drink... 286 00:15:22,556 --> 00:15:25,258 and you're gonna go straight to the bedroom. 287 00:15:25,259 --> 00:15:28,261 I don't know what's happening right now. I feel like if you could just include me... 288 00:15:28,262 --> 00:15:29,512 Do you want me to make you? 289 00:15:30,814 --> 00:15:32,348 - Do I... - I'll make you. 290 00:15:32,349 --> 00:15:33,516 You're gonna... 291 00:15:34,652 --> 00:15:36,569 Just go, please. Just go. 292 00:15:36,570 --> 00:15:37,937 - Okay. - Go. 293 00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:44,777 Wait, why do we have two? 294 00:15:44,778 --> 00:15:48,047 Actually, according to my agent, I'm supposed to eat, like, all of this pizza. 295 00:15:48,949 --> 00:15:50,451 I don't get it. 296 00:15:50,452 --> 00:15:51,701 She, uh... 297 00:15:52,786 --> 00:15:54,337 with a great sense of compassion, 298 00:15:54,338 --> 00:15:56,289 told me that I am a "tweener." 299 00:15:56,290 --> 00:15:58,292 which means I'm too fat for leading-man roles 300 00:15:58,293 --> 00:16:01,794 and I'm too skinny to be the chubby, funny best friend. 301 00:16:01,795 --> 00:16:03,796 But you want to be a leading man. 302 00:16:04,932 --> 00:16:06,466 Nah, I'm already fat as fuck anyway 303 00:16:06,467 --> 00:16:08,969 and, you know, losing my hair. 304 00:16:08,970 --> 00:16:10,887 - Pushing 40... - Oh, wait, hold on, Frank's... Hold on. 305 00:16:10,888 --> 00:16:12,272 What? What's that, buddy? 306 00:16:15,359 --> 00:16:17,560 He said you could be the next Brad Pitt... 307 00:16:18,729 --> 00:16:21,281 if you just stop acting like a big puss. 308 00:16:21,282 --> 00:16:22,398 Frank said that? 309 00:16:22,399 --> 00:16:24,651 Listen to me, I'm about to blow your fucking mind. 310 00:16:24,652 --> 00:16:26,320 - Yeah? - Yeah. 311 00:16:26,321 --> 00:16:28,705 I'm gonna train you. And when I'm through with you, 312 00:16:28,706 --> 00:16:30,456 you are gonna get leading-man roles. 313 00:16:30,457 --> 00:16:32,492 You're gonna train... What do you know about training? 314 00:16:34,161 --> 00:16:35,962 My friend... 315 00:16:35,963 --> 00:16:39,082 your whole life is about to change. 316 00:16:39,083 --> 00:16:40,917 - Okay. Mm-hmm. - Excuse me. 317 00:16:40,918 --> 00:16:44,671 Take that pizza, walk over to that trash can, and throw it in the trash. 318 00:16:48,592 --> 00:16:50,560 No, I can't do that. This is a whole pizza. 319 00:16:50,561 --> 00:16:52,595 Take yourself seriously. 320 00:16:54,181 --> 00:16:55,565 What's gonna replace this? 321 00:16:55,566 --> 00:16:57,317 When this is gone what's gonna replace it? 322 00:16:57,318 --> 00:16:59,068 Stop asking questions, 323 00:16:59,069 --> 00:17:01,070 and get up and do it. 324 00:17:02,573 --> 00:17:03,856 You can do this. Come on. 325 00:17:04,825 --> 00:17:06,109 Stand up, right now, 326 00:17:06,110 --> 00:17:07,877 walk to the trash. 327 00:17:27,965 --> 00:17:31,718 Doesn't it feel good? Don't you feel lighter already? 328 00:17:31,719 --> 00:17:33,886 You feel like a weight's been lifted? 329 00:17:33,887 --> 00:17:35,104 Yeah, a little bit. 330 00:17:35,105 --> 00:17:38,107 My friend, you will always remember this moment. 331 00:17:48,947 --> 00:17:50,197 What are you doing? 332 00:17:51,538 --> 00:17:53,906 I'm taking my clothes off. What are you doing? 333 00:17:55,376 --> 00:17:57,243 Who told you to take your clothes off? 334 00:17:58,162 --> 00:17:59,996 Um... 335 00:18:02,633 --> 00:18:04,752 - Stand up. - Is that for tonight, or are we... 336 00:18:04,753 --> 00:18:07,303 Stand... up. 337 00:18:07,304 --> 00:18:09,889 - Okay, I'm sorry. All right, I'm up. - Come on. 338 00:18:10,891 --> 00:18:13,176 Okay, now you can get undressed. 339 00:18:13,177 --> 00:18:14,894 - Now I can take... okay. - Yeah. 340 00:18:14,895 --> 00:18:16,145 Get naked, go on. 341 00:18:16,146 --> 00:18:17,765 Don't mind if I do. 342 00:18:17,766 --> 00:18:19,099 And... I like it. 343 00:18:19,100 --> 00:18:21,684 I'm going to take my clothes off and... 344 00:18:21,685 --> 00:18:23,736 I might even help you out, just... 345 00:18:23,737 --> 00:18:25,104 - What? - No. 346 00:18:25,105 --> 00:18:26,823 - Are... - No. 347 00:18:26,824 --> 00:18:28,442 - Are you not... - You don't get to touch me. 348 00:18:28,443 --> 00:18:30,193 Take your pants off. 349 00:18:30,194 --> 00:18:32,161 - Are you not getting undressed? - Pants off. 350 00:18:32,162 --> 00:18:35,781 - I'm happy to take my pants off. - You're not gonna know what I'm gonna do. 351 00:18:37,117 --> 00:18:38,501 Oh. 352 00:18:39,420 --> 00:18:41,421 I can't tell if this is... 353 00:18:41,423 --> 00:18:43,424 - Okay, all right. - Go on. 354 00:18:43,424 --> 00:18:45,007 Are you gonna get naked at some point? 355 00:18:45,008 --> 00:18:48,044 You can stop asking me questions and do what I told you. 356 00:18:48,045 --> 00:18:49,879 Okay, all right. 357 00:18:49,880 --> 00:18:51,097 Um... 358 00:18:52,049 --> 00:18:53,466 But you left something on. 359 00:18:54,385 --> 00:18:55,551 Right. 360 00:18:55,552 --> 00:18:56,936 Didn't I tell you to take everything off? 361 00:18:56,937 --> 00:19:00,807 - Are we gonna, like, kiss or something? - Take your underpants off. 362 00:19:00,808 --> 00:19:02,692 Take them off. 363 00:19:02,693 --> 00:19:04,026 Oh, okay, yeah. 364 00:19:04,027 --> 00:19:05,311 - Take them off. - Yeah. Yeah, of course. 365 00:19:05,312 --> 00:19:06,980 - I wanna see everything. - There. Got it, okay. 366 00:19:06,981 --> 00:19:08,148 Good. 367 00:19:08,149 --> 00:19:09,866 - I like it. - It's all here. 368 00:19:09,867 --> 00:19:11,617 Okay, sit down. 369 00:19:11,618 --> 00:19:14,370 I would like to see you naked. I would like to know we're in it together. 370 00:19:14,371 --> 00:19:17,290 Okay, maybe at some point I'm gonna be naked. 371 00:19:17,291 --> 00:19:18,541 - Just, for now... - Okay. Okay. 372 00:19:18,542 --> 00:19:21,294 - We're just gonna do what I wanna do. - Okay. 373 00:19:21,295 --> 00:19:22,795 - Could I get a... - The bed... sit down. 374 00:19:22,796 --> 00:19:24,213 Could I get a banana real quick? 375 00:19:24,214 --> 00:19:25,548 I'm getting a little sugar crashy... 376 00:19:25,549 --> 00:19:26,549 Are you serious? 377 00:19:26,550 --> 00:19:28,050 All right, never mind. I'm on the bed. 378 00:19:28,051 --> 00:19:30,052 - Okay, good. - I'm on the bed. 379 00:19:30,053 --> 00:19:32,339 Okay, those are handcuffs. 380 00:19:32,340 --> 00:19:33,890 Holy shit. All right. 381 00:19:33,891 --> 00:19:36,342 - Mm-hmm. Give me your hands, please. - Okay. 382 00:19:36,343 --> 00:19:40,313 This is your punishment for trying to touch me before. 383 00:19:40,314 --> 00:19:42,515 Was I being bad? Was I doing a little bit of that? 384 00:19:42,516 --> 00:19:44,351 - Was I doing... - Oh, that's really bad. 385 00:19:44,352 --> 00:19:45,902 Oh, I see... okay. 386 00:19:45,903 --> 00:19:47,521 - You're very bad. - Mm-hmm. 387 00:19:47,522 --> 00:19:48,688 Get on all fours. 388 00:19:49,656 --> 00:19:51,441 - You want me to like... - Yeah. 389 00:19:51,442 --> 00:19:53,276 - Like a dog? - Yeah, that's what I want. Yeah. 390 00:19:54,912 --> 00:19:57,163 - Yeah, that's what I want. - I really want to make love tonight. 391 00:19:57,164 --> 00:19:59,115 - I'm super excited, I'm... - Do it. 392 00:19:59,116 --> 00:20:01,000 - Okay. Oh my God. Okay. - Do it now. 393 00:20:01,001 --> 00:20:02,952 All right. Okay. All right. 394 00:20:03,754 --> 00:20:05,288 Ooh, okay. Um... 395 00:20:06,707 --> 00:20:08,375 It's a little chilly in here. Would you mind... 396 00:20:08,376 --> 00:20:10,176 No. No... just turning the heat up a little bit? 397 00:20:10,177 --> 00:20:12,211 No, that was not like, me... I wasn't being in character. Stop... 398 00:20:12,212 --> 00:20:14,013 I was just wondering if we could turn the heat up. 399 00:20:14,014 --> 00:20:16,215 Can you stop being a pussy... 400 00:20:17,384 --> 00:20:18,718 That's a little rude... for one second? 401 00:20:18,719 --> 00:20:20,102 I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to be a pussy. 402 00:20:20,103 --> 00:20:22,472 Listen, I'm super excited about the lovemaking, 403 00:20:22,473 --> 00:20:24,390 but I'm a little hungry... ow! Fuck! 404 00:20:24,391 --> 00:20:26,943 What did you just slap my ass for? 405 00:20:26,944 --> 00:20:28,778 I told you that I was gonna punish you, 406 00:20:28,779 --> 00:20:30,196 'cause you were trying to touch my boobs 407 00:20:30,197 --> 00:20:31,564 - when I told you you couldn't. - Jesus, Michelle. 408 00:20:31,565 --> 00:20:33,567 Okay? So... Fuck, I'll never try to touch your boobs again. 409 00:20:33,568 --> 00:20:35,785 - Let this play out. - Sorry. Jesus. 410 00:20:35,786 --> 00:20:37,737 Let me do what I wanna do, 411 00:20:37,738 --> 00:20:40,957 and good things are coming, okay? 412 00:20:40,959 --> 00:20:42,543 - That's the point of it. - Okay, okay. 413 00:20:42,543 --> 00:20:44,210 You're not gonna put anything in there though, right? 414 00:20:44,211 --> 00:20:46,245 'Cause I can't... if you're gonna put something in, 415 00:20:46,246 --> 00:20:47,748 I... that's my last thing. 416 00:20:47,749 --> 00:20:50,166 - No, I'm not gonna put anything in there. - I don't have anything else. 417 00:20:50,167 --> 00:20:51,752 - Okay, got it. I'm ready. - Look, okay? 418 00:20:51,753 --> 00:20:53,719 - Okay, I'm gonna be good. - Good. 419 00:20:54,721 --> 00:20:56,055 Okay, I'm gonna spank you again, 420 00:20:56,056 --> 00:20:57,390 because of before... 421 00:20:57,391 --> 00:20:59,342 - Okay... - When you were bad. 422 00:21:00,227 --> 00:21:02,095 I was bad. So... 423 00:21:02,096 --> 00:21:03,763 You got it, and I deserve to be spanked. Yeah. 424 00:21:03,764 --> 00:21:05,231 Yeah, you do. 425 00:21:05,232 --> 00:21:07,767 And once you spank me enough, I get to take your clothes off 426 00:21:07,768 --> 00:21:08,901 - and get my reward. - Yes. 427 00:21:08,902 --> 00:21:10,270 - Is that right? - Yeah. 428 00:21:10,270 --> 00:21:12,854 - Then I think it's time for spanking. - But that's when I say. 429 00:21:12,856 --> 00:21:13,990 - When I say. - Okay, fine. 430 00:21:13,991 --> 00:21:15,408 - Your terms, but... - Okay. 431 00:21:15,409 --> 00:21:17,944 Let's get to spank... okay, here we... yeah. Yeah. 432 00:21:17,945 --> 00:21:20,196 - Yeah, you like that? - You know what? I do. 433 00:21:20,197 --> 00:21:21,247 - You do? - I really do. 434 00:21:21,248 --> 00:21:22,950 - You like that? - I'm enjoying the spanking. 435 00:21:22,951 --> 00:21:24,283 - Yeah, you like that. - I do, I do. 436 00:21:24,284 --> 00:21:26,285 - Yeah, I like the spanking. - Does that feel good? 437 00:21:26,286 --> 00:21:28,622 - And when we spank enough... - Yeah, you know you deserve it. 438 00:21:28,623 --> 00:21:30,923 That dress is gonna... ow! Oh! 439 00:21:30,924 --> 00:21:32,341 - Fuck! Oh God! - What?! 440 00:21:32,342 --> 00:21:33,843 - Oh fuck! - Did I get something? 441 00:21:33,844 --> 00:21:35,294 Did I do something? What happened? 442 00:21:35,295 --> 00:21:37,296 - You got my ball. You hit my ball. - Shit. 443 00:21:37,297 --> 00:21:38,714 - Okay, I'm sure it's fine. - Oh, Jesus Christ. 444 00:21:38,715 --> 00:21:40,466 Let me look, okay. I'm sure it's fine. 445 00:21:40,467 --> 00:21:42,184 - Oh shit, Brett! - My ball! 446 00:21:42,185 --> 00:21:43,302 - Oh my God. - Look at my ball. 447 00:21:43,304 --> 00:21:44,806 - Oh God, Brett. - Look at my ball. 448 00:21:44,806 --> 00:21:46,906 - I need ice. Get ice, please. - Okay. 449 00:21:46,907 --> 00:21:48,190 Ice! Ice! 450 00:21:48,191 --> 00:21:49,859 - Shh! I'm going, okay? - Please! 451 00:21:49,860 --> 00:21:51,277 Oh, god damn it. 452 00:21:51,278 --> 00:21:53,946 - God! - Just break the fucking lock open! 453 00:21:53,947 --> 00:21:55,781 - I didn't do the greatest job on the lock. - Go! 454 00:21:55,782 --> 00:21:57,316 Do not wait! 455 00:21:58,151 --> 00:21:59,702 Oh God. 456 00:21:59,703 --> 00:22:01,237 Ow. 457 00:22:01,238 --> 00:22:03,739 Oh, once you get the... the burps are coming. 458 00:22:03,740 --> 00:22:05,041 Brett, there's no ice. 459 00:22:05,042 --> 00:22:06,660 What do you mean there's no ice?! 460 00:22:06,661 --> 00:22:08,294 You didn't fix the ice maker. 461 00:22:08,295 --> 00:22:11,331 You people never fill the ice trays in this house, 462 00:22:11,332 --> 00:22:13,333 and it fucking pisses me off! 463 00:22:13,334 --> 00:22:15,801 Get me some frozen peas or some vegetables. 464 00:22:15,802 --> 00:22:17,386 This is what we have. 465 00:22:17,387 --> 00:22:18,804 Are you f... oh my God. 466 00:22:18,805 --> 00:22:20,590 - We don't have frozen peas. - Are you kidding me? 467 00:22:20,591 --> 00:22:22,091 - Just don't look at it. - I'm sorry, Sophie. 468 00:22:22,092 --> 00:22:24,143 - Oh fuck. - Okay. 469 00:22:24,144 --> 00:22:25,311 Oh shit. 470 00:22:25,312 --> 00:22:26,680 Are you okay? 471 00:22:26,681 --> 00:22:28,681 Are you gonna be sick? Are you really gonna be sick? 472 00:22:28,682 --> 00:22:31,734 When you get a ball crushed, it goes into your stomach. But I think I'm gonna throw up. 473 00:22:31,735 --> 00:22:33,519 - Do you want the trash can? - Get me a bucket. 474 00:22:33,520 --> 00:22:35,354 Oh shit. 475 00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:38,491 Okay, it's here. It's here, baby, okay? 476 00:22:38,492 --> 00:22:40,610 Oh, Jesus, there's a dirty diaper in there, Michelle! 477 00:22:40,611 --> 00:22:41,894 Well, it's the trash! Come on! 478 00:22:41,895 --> 00:22:43,929 A picture of you and your mother... 479 00:22:45,499 --> 00:22:47,783 right above the fireplace. I think that works beautifully, don't you? 480 00:22:47,784 --> 00:22:49,536 She was with me when I bought the tile. 481 00:22:49,537 --> 00:22:52,338 - Oh my God. - I can't believe you did this... 482 00:22:54,625 --> 00:22:56,626 You have, like, 52 keys. 483 00:22:56,627 --> 00:22:57,927 Here, hand Frank over. 484 00:23:00,213 --> 00:23:01,263 All right. 485 00:23:01,264 --> 00:23:03,215 There you are. 486 00:23:05,552 --> 00:23:06,686 You having trouble? 487 00:23:06,687 --> 00:23:07,888 - Yes. - How's this? 488 00:23:09,856 --> 00:23:11,391 I mean... 489 00:23:11,392 --> 00:23:12,559 Ugh, the big payback. 490 00:23:12,560 --> 00:23:14,694 Play on her now, ugh! 491 00:23:14,695 --> 00:23:16,062 Big payback, ugh! 492 00:23:16,063 --> 00:23:17,947 Could you possibly get me inside? 493 00:23:17,948 --> 00:23:19,899 The big payback. Actually I think it's open. 494 00:23:19,900 --> 00:23:22,368 The big payback. Yep, see? 495 00:23:22,369 --> 00:23:23,819 Big payback, ugh! My God, ugh! 36802

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