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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:18,757 --> 00:00:21,412 [all gasp] 2 00:00:21,456 --> 00:00:23,719 Oh, God, Oh, God. Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no. 3 00:00:23,762 --> 00:00:26,200 This is bad. This is very bad. I'm not supposed to be here. 4 00:00:26,243 --> 00:00:28,071 I have a pottery class at 0900! 5 00:00:28,115 --> 00:00:30,073 Hey, just calm down. We don't know what this is. 6 00:00:30,117 --> 00:00:33,033 Are you kidding me?! Creepy stone walls, jagged metal bars. 7 00:00:33,076 --> 00:00:35,426 This has alien prison written all over it. 8 00:00:35,470 --> 00:00:36,645 A prison? Nah. No way, man. 9 00:00:36,688 --> 00:00:39,082 - This is a dungeon. - That's even worse! 10 00:00:39,126 --> 00:00:41,824 Hello? Can someone give us some context in here, please? 11 00:00:41,867 --> 00:00:44,609 A dungeon?! But we didn't do anything. Did we? 12 00:00:44,653 --> 00:00:45,871 [gasps] Oh. 13 00:00:45,915 --> 00:00:47,960 I've been replicating a lot of ice. 14 00:00:48,004 --> 00:00:49,112 Are we not supposed to do that? 15 00:00:49,136 --> 00:00:50,354 I really like ice. 16 00:00:50,398 --> 00:00:51,549 I saw the captain and the bridge crew 17 00:00:51,573 --> 00:00:52,748 get taken into another room. 18 00:00:52,791 --> 00:00:54,750 What if they were replicating ice, too?! 19 00:00:54,793 --> 00:00:56,491 Guys, this is basically a resort 20 00:00:56,534 --> 00:00:58,034 compared to what the Klingons do to you. 21 00:00:58,058 --> 00:00:59,407 I'm sure it's not a big... 22 00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:02,105 [all shouting, gasping] 23 00:01:03,585 --> 00:01:05,587 โ™ช 24 00:01:22,995 --> 00:01:24,997 โ™ช 25 00:01:59,380 --> 00:02:01,382 โ™ช 26 00:02:17,659 --> 00:02:19,748 [drums beating] 27 00:02:19,791 --> 00:02:22,054 [gruff alien chanting] 28 00:02:22,098 --> 00:02:23,273 [crew stammering] 29 00:02:23,882 --> 00:02:25,884 - Uh, hi? - Oh, man, 30 00:02:25,928 --> 00:02:27,968 they have all of our commanders suspended in a beam! 31 00:02:29,192 --> 00:02:31,325 - They must be on trial. - For what? 32 00:02:31,368 --> 00:02:34,154 [clanging, zapping] 33 00:02:34,197 --> 00:02:36,721 Fellow Primes! 34 00:02:36,765 --> 00:02:40,072 These Federation witnesses have been brought before you 35 00:02:40,116 --> 00:02:41,683 to speak truth 36 00:02:41,726 --> 00:02:43,554 about the senior officers 37 00:02:43,598 --> 00:02:47,254 of the Federation starship Cerritos. 38 00:02:47,297 --> 00:02:49,256 [murmuring] 39 00:02:49,299 --> 00:02:50,866 I-I didn't witness anything. Did you? 40 00:02:50,909 --> 00:02:52,060 I don't know. What's the difference between witnessing 41 00:02:52,084 --> 00:02:53,347 and just lookin' at something? 42 00:02:53,390 --> 00:02:56,872 You will speak only into the Horn of Candor! 43 00:02:59,135 --> 00:03:02,182 With this horn, one of our most sacred horns, 44 00:03:02,225 --> 00:03:05,141 you must only speak the truth. 45 00:03:05,185 --> 00:03:06,621 Happy to be here. [chuckles] 46 00:03:06,664 --> 00:03:07,989 I-I don't even know what we're supposed 47 00:03:08,013 --> 00:03:09,232 to be telling the truth about. 48 00:03:09,276 --> 00:03:12,104 The first to give testimony will be 49 00:03:12,148 --> 00:03:14,803 Ensign Beckett Mariner. 50 00:03:14,846 --> 00:03:16,979 Ship logs state you were present on the bridge 51 00:03:17,022 --> 00:03:19,982 when the Cerritosmade contact with the Clicket ship Tweerk 52 00:03:20,025 --> 00:03:24,291 on stardate 57818.4. 53 00:03:24,334 --> 00:03:27,424 Uh, I was, but I don't know what you want me to... 54 00:03:27,468 --> 00:03:29,905 Tell us of those wondrous events! 55 00:03:29,948 --> 00:03:32,473 Okay. It started off as a usual day. 56 00:03:32,516 --> 00:03:35,084 We were just hanging out. I mean, we were just doing work 57 00:03:35,127 --> 00:03:36,520 in the repair bay. 58 00:03:36,564 --> 00:03:39,175 Roga Danar? Are you nuts? 59 00:03:39,219 --> 00:03:41,482 I said "Who's the all-time biggest badass?" 60 00:03:41,525 --> 00:03:43,266 not "Who's a dude nobody's heard about?" 61 00:03:43,310 --> 00:03:45,007 Uh, everyone knows Roga Danar. 62 00:03:45,050 --> 00:03:47,270 - No, they don't. - He totally outsmarted Picard, 63 00:03:47,314 --> 00:03:48,576 and he has amazing hair! 64 00:03:48,619 --> 00:03:50,404 Well, what about Khan, right? 65 00:03:50,447 --> 00:03:52,928 Khan was a genetically engineered supervillain! 66 00:03:52,971 --> 00:03:54,669 Dude was a space seed. 67 00:03:54,712 --> 00:03:56,342 Ooh, ooh, pause for a second. I want to talk about Khan 68 00:03:56,366 --> 00:03:58,412 and that thicc, thicc chest, but I got to pee. 69 00:03:58,455 --> 00:04:00,781 -[door whooshes open, alarm wailing in distance] -Roga Danar. 70 00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:02,783 - Get the [bleep] out of my face.-[door whooshes shut] 71 00:04:02,807 --> 00:04:04,418 Guys, the ship's at red alert. 72 00:04:04,461 --> 00:04:05,462 Uh, no, it isn't. 73 00:04:05,506 --> 00:04:06,855 Yeah, that's impossible. 74 00:04:06,898 --> 00:04:08,944 I messed with our speakers so they'd be extra loud 75 00:04:08,987 --> 00:04:10,511 during a red alert. We'd know for sure. 76 00:04:10,554 --> 00:04:13,688 You messed with the red alert speakers? 77 00:04:13,731 --> 00:04:15,124 [gasping, panting] 78 00:04:16,168 --> 00:04:17,518 - [alarm wailing] - [screaming] 79 00:04:17,561 --> 00:04:19,481 Uh, it's, like, red alert everywhere except here! 80 00:04:19,520 --> 00:04:20,912 - Rutherford! - Aw, man. 81 00:04:20,956 --> 00:04:22,716 Oh, we're gonna get in such big trouble for this. 82 00:04:22,740 --> 00:04:23,978 We have to get to our stations! 83 00:04:24,002 --> 00:04:25,482 [panting] 84 00:04:25,526 --> 00:04:27,571 Gah, why did we have to have bridge duty today? 85 00:04:27,615 --> 00:04:28,940 We're gonna walk in and everyone's gonna be 86 00:04:28,964 --> 00:04:31,009 - lookin' at us. - No, they won't. Just chill. 87 00:04:31,053 --> 00:04:32,596 Okay, we'll just explain what happened and why we're late. 88 00:04:32,620 --> 00:04:33,838 It'll-it'll be fine. 89 00:04:33,882 --> 00:04:35,187 You want Rutherford fired? No. 90 00:04:35,231 --> 00:04:36,600 Just follow my lead, all right? We'll fake it. 91 00:04:36,624 --> 00:04:38,147 - Fake what?! - It! 92 00:04:38,190 --> 00:04:39,298 I'm not faking on the bridge. 93 00:04:39,322 --> 00:04:40,671 That's insane! 94 00:04:40,715 --> 00:04:41,629 The captain already knows what she wants you to do, 95 00:04:41,672 --> 00:04:43,021 so just nod and agree with her, 96 00:04:43,065 --> 00:04:44,564 or we'll all end up getting kicked off the ship 97 00:04:44,588 --> 00:04:45,870 and then we'll have to live on Earth, 98 00:04:45,894 --> 00:04:47,263 where there's nothing to do except drink wine 99 00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:49,177 and hang out at vineyards and soul food restaurants! 100 00:04:49,201 --> 00:04:51,334 [alarm continues blaring] 101 00:04:51,378 --> 00:04:53,467 Ugh, these guys are maniacs. 102 00:04:53,510 --> 00:04:54,816 Captain, what happened? 103 00:04:54,859 --> 00:04:57,340 They just randomly attacked me for thanking them. 104 00:04:57,384 --> 00:05:00,517 [shouts] This injustice will not stand. 105 00:05:00,561 --> 00:05:02,563 We gave you the map, and now you turn on us?! 106 00:05:02,606 --> 00:05:05,217 Captain, this is all a misunderstanding. 107 00:05:05,261 --> 00:05:08,699 I simply showed gratitude for your map of the Neutral Zone. 108 00:05:08,743 --> 00:05:10,484 Gratitude?! How dare you! 109 00:05:10,527 --> 00:05:11,678 - [quietly]: Who is this guy? - Who cares, man? 110 00:05:11,702 --> 00:05:12,834 Bug alien. Roll with it. 111 00:05:12,877 --> 00:05:14,357 I meant no offense. 112 00:05:14,401 --> 00:05:16,359 I think your people have a different definition 113 00:05:16,403 --> 00:05:17,360 of "gratitude." 114 00:05:17,404 --> 00:05:19,449 Give us back the map! 115 00:05:19,493 --> 00:05:21,886 Ugh, this guy is really buggin'! 116 00:05:21,930 --> 00:05:23,366 Mariner, what do you think? 117 00:05:23,410 --> 00:05:25,301 I think you know exactly how to handle this, Captain. 118 00:05:25,325 --> 00:05:26,761 You're right about that. 119 00:05:26,804 --> 00:05:28,937 Ensign Boimler, I want options. 120 00:05:28,980 --> 00:05:30,939 Uh, about the... this alien guy? 121 00:05:30,982 --> 00:05:32,332 Yes. Obviously. 122 00:05:32,375 --> 00:05:34,899 Uh, what specifically do you wish to know? 123 00:05:34,943 --> 00:05:36,336 Aw, come on, man! 124 00:05:36,379 --> 00:05:38,381 This is your chance to prove you got what it takes! 125 00:05:38,425 --> 00:05:40,490 [clears throat] Oh! Well, I-I don't know, uh, who, uh... 126 00:05:40,514 --> 00:05:41,471 Well, the truth is... 127 00:05:41,515 --> 00:05:42,994 Uh, I think we should do, 128 00:05:43,038 --> 00:05:45,475 uh, what you want to do, Cap'n. 129 00:05:45,519 --> 00:05:46,520 Cap'n's choice. 130 00:05:46,563 --> 00:05:48,870 I'm not asking you to kiss my ass. 131 00:05:48,913 --> 00:05:50,567 Come on. No wrong answers. 132 00:05:50,611 --> 00:05:52,787 Uh, okay. We could do evasive maneuver 133 00:05:52,830 --> 00:05:53,788 eighty... 134 00:05:53,831 --> 00:05:55,746 eight...? 135 00:05:55,790 --> 00:05:57,487 Is he [bleep]ing serious? 136 00:05:57,531 --> 00:05:58,749 That was the wrong answer! 137 00:05:58,793 --> 00:06:00,447 - I meant 84. - In thissituation? 138 00:06:00,490 --> 00:06:02,144 - Are you crazy? - Mariner! 139 00:06:02,187 --> 00:06:03,547 Have you not been paying attention? 140 00:06:03,580 --> 00:06:04,799 That could get us killed. 141 00:06:04,842 --> 00:06:06,385 [chuckles]: No, no, no, no. I was kidding. 142 00:06:06,409 --> 00:06:09,673 Let's just... Let's use the impulse drive to... Crazy Ivan. 143 00:06:09,717 --> 00:06:12,130 -Ugh! Who the hell is he talking about? -What in the world is that?! 144 00:06:12,154 --> 00:06:14,112 -What? -That's insane. -But-but-but-but... 145 00:06:14,156 --> 00:06:15,984 Son, you're embarrassing yourself. 146 00:06:16,027 --> 00:06:18,290 You got a lot to learn. Mariner, 147 00:06:18,334 --> 00:06:20,902 why don't you send our friends a message. 148 00:06:20,945 --> 00:06:22,730 Good call, Captain. 149 00:06:25,341 --> 00:06:26,971 -What?! -Are you insane?! -What the hell are you doing?! 150 00:06:26,995 --> 00:06:28,842 You said "Send them a message." That means phasers! 151 00:06:28,866 --> 00:06:30,888 It means to send them a message to invite them to dinner! 152 00:06:30,912 --> 00:06:32,130 No, it doesn't! 153 00:06:32,174 --> 00:06:34,785 [grunts] Target their bridge! 154 00:06:35,786 --> 00:06:37,222 - [grunting] - CLAR: Stop! Stop! 155 00:06:37,266 --> 00:06:38,528 What are you talking about?! 156 00:06:38,572 --> 00:06:39,984 What? I'm just telling you what happened. 157 00:06:40,008 --> 00:06:42,445 You expect me to believe a Starfleet officer 158 00:06:42,489 --> 00:06:44,665 wouldn't know what's going on with their ship 159 00:06:44,708 --> 00:06:46,275 at all times?! 160 00:06:46,318 --> 00:06:48,233 Look, I'm not proud of it, but yeah. 161 00:06:48,277 --> 00:06:49,626 What about the map? 162 00:06:49,670 --> 00:06:50,888 Tell me about the map! 163 00:06:50,932 --> 00:06:51,976 Uh, there was a map? 164 00:06:52,020 --> 00:06:53,891 That's the most important part! 165 00:06:53,935 --> 00:06:55,980 Dude, look, I work on a spaceship, all right? 166 00:06:56,024 --> 00:06:58,896 We don't have maps. We have stellar cartography. 167 00:06:58,940 --> 00:07:00,550 What is wrong with you?! 168 00:07:00,594 --> 00:07:02,552 Place her in the Tank of Contempt! 169 00:07:02,596 --> 00:07:04,424 [gasping, whimpering] 170 00:07:06,426 --> 00:07:08,297 Oh! We got eels. There's eels over here. 171 00:07:08,340 --> 00:07:09,579 Mariner's not lying! I was there! 172 00:07:09,603 --> 00:07:10,691 We didn't see a map! 173 00:07:13,389 --> 00:07:16,479 Perhaps this is a misunderstanding. 174 00:07:16,523 --> 00:07:18,481 You may go un-eeled. 175 00:07:18,525 --> 00:07:19,743 For now. 176 00:07:19,787 --> 00:07:22,137 [whoops] Better luck next time, eels. 177 00:07:22,180 --> 00:07:24,550 Why does this guy care so muchabout a map of the Neutral Zone? 178 00:07:24,574 --> 00:07:26,054 Yeah, it's so neutral. 179 00:07:26,097 --> 00:07:27,988 Yeah, like, what would you even do with a map like that? 180 00:07:28,012 --> 00:07:29,579 [chuckles nervously] I have no idea. 181 00:07:29,623 --> 00:07:31,755 Ensign Samanthan Rutherford, 182 00:07:31,799 --> 00:07:33,496 perhaps you can illuminate me more 183 00:07:33,540 --> 00:07:35,629 than your unobservant compatriots. 184 00:07:35,672 --> 00:07:37,544 Um, well, I mean, my cyborg implant 185 00:07:37,587 --> 00:07:39,371 does give me perfect memory. [chuckles] 186 00:07:39,415 --> 00:07:40,764 That will be of great use! 187 00:07:40,808 --> 00:07:46,509 Tell me of stardate 57791.1. 188 00:07:46,553 --> 00:07:49,381 All right. Stardate 5779, eh... Hey. 189 00:07:49,425 --> 00:07:50,865 Wait, are you sure you want that one? 190 00:07:50,905 --> 00:07:53,777 Just 'cause I haveso many great stardates in here. 191 00:07:53,821 --> 00:07:55,475 Other than that one. [chuckles] 192 00:07:55,518 --> 00:07:56,954 I want the one I said! 193 00:07:56,998 --> 00:07:59,653 Uh, you're not gonna like it. 194 00:07:59,696 --> 00:08:00,654 So, there I was, 195 00:08:00,697 --> 00:08:02,438 rotating the EPS capacitors. 196 00:08:02,482 --> 00:08:03,962 See, they overheat when you leave them 197 00:08:04,005 --> 00:08:05,485 facing one direction too long. 198 00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:08,226 โ™ช Rotate, rotate, rotating all day long โ™ช 199 00:08:08,270 --> 00:08:09,726 -โ™ช While singing my rotation... โ™ช -Ah. There he is! 200 00:08:09,750 --> 00:08:11,491 Hey, sirs! You want to rotate with me? 201 00:08:11,534 --> 00:08:12,709 Maybe sing a little song? 202 00:08:12,753 --> 00:08:14,165 If you heard the one earlier... [chuckles] 203 00:08:14,189 --> 00:08:16,887 No! Does your implant have Romulan flight manuals 204 00:08:16,931 --> 00:08:18,517 - and repair information? - Uh, not right now. 205 00:08:18,541 --> 00:08:20,543 - I'd need to update it. - Then do it. Now! 206 00:08:20,587 --> 00:08:23,372 Uh, well, usually I like to update it while I'm asleep 207 00:08:23,415 --> 00:08:25,026 'cause it kind of messes with my... 208 00:08:25,069 --> 00:08:27,985 - No! Do it now! - You do it right this second! 209 00:08:28,029 --> 00:08:30,292 - Okeydokey. - [trilling] 210 00:08:30,335 --> 00:08:31,946 IMPLANT: 30 seconds until restart. 211 00:08:31,989 --> 00:08:33,948 - Is it done yet?! - What? No. It just started. 212 00:08:33,991 --> 00:08:35,534 While we wait, I'll fill you in on the plan. 213 00:08:35,558 --> 00:08:37,358 Oh, uh, first off: do you have all your shots? 214 00:08:37,386 --> 00:08:39,736 -Wait. Which shots? Like, with needles? -Ten seconds. 215 00:08:39,780 --> 00:08:41,477 Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Let me just... 216 00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:43,586 We don't want you getting Dinobulan flesh-eating bacteria 217 00:08:43,610 --> 00:08:45,544 -on your pe... -Hold up just a second. My implant is also... 218 00:08:45,568 --> 00:08:47,614 -It'll eat right through your underpants. -My what?! 219 00:08:47,657 --> 00:08:49,354 I've seen it happen. Terrible way to die. 220 00:08:49,398 --> 00:08:50,941 - Restarting Rutherford. - Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait! 221 00:08:50,965 --> 00:08:53,881 - Wait, wait, wait. - [whirring] 222 00:08:55,186 --> 00:08:58,276 Whoa. I think I blacked out 223 00:08:58,320 --> 00:09:00,496 and lost a little bit of time during that update. 224 00:09:00,540 --> 00:09:03,194 Great work nerve-pinching those Vulcans, baby bear. 225 00:09:03,238 --> 00:09:05,153 Who knew you'd be better at it than they are? 226 00:09:05,196 --> 00:09:07,285 -I did? But I don't know how to nerve-pinch. -Ha! 227 00:09:07,329 --> 00:09:09,374 Tell that to Spock and Spock. 228 00:09:09,418 --> 00:09:10,613 Oh, when my implant was rebooting, 229 00:09:10,637 --> 00:09:12,116 it must have taken control. 230 00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:14,249 We're entering the atmosphere. Brace for turbulence. 231 00:09:14,292 --> 00:09:16,053 Sirs, you don't understand. I don't know what's going on. 232 00:09:16,077 --> 00:09:18,862 When we're in the museum, our window's gonna be really tight. 233 00:09:18,906 --> 00:09:21,082 - Museum? - We have to deploy now! 234 00:09:21,125 --> 00:09:23,432 - No, no, no, no, no, no, no! - [grunts] 235 00:09:23,475 --> 00:09:25,869 [yelling] 236 00:09:25,913 --> 00:09:28,568 Verifying update. System will restart in three seconds. 237 00:09:31,571 --> 00:09:34,356 [Rutherford groans] 238 00:09:34,399 --> 00:09:37,098 - Ah! Romulan Bird-of-Prey? - SHAXS: Quiet! 239 00:09:37,141 --> 00:09:39,491 [grunting] 240 00:09:39,535 --> 00:09:41,668 We don't want to draw any attention. 241 00:09:41,711 --> 00:09:44,366 -From who? What are we doing? What's happening? -Hey! 242 00:09:44,409 --> 00:09:45,759 What are you two doing back here? 243 00:09:45,802 --> 00:09:47,195 You've drawn my attention. 244 00:09:47,238 --> 00:09:48,675 Distract him with the fan dance! 245 00:09:48,718 --> 00:09:51,025 I'm sorry. My what now? 246 00:09:51,068 --> 00:09:54,637 - Dance, boy! Dance! - Ooh. Ooh. Yeah. 247 00:09:54,681 --> 00:09:56,204 Feels good, feels right... 248 00:09:56,247 --> 00:09:58,728 Hey! Stop that! Now you're distracting me! 249 00:09:58,772 --> 00:10:02,036 [rhythmic grunting] Right. Right. 250 00:10:02,079 --> 00:10:03,951 I want the regular fan dance! 251 00:10:03,994 --> 00:10:05,126 What are you doing?! 252 00:10:05,169 --> 00:10:06,693 My best. [yelling] 253 00:10:06,736 --> 00:10:08,825 IMPLANT: Verifying download. 254 00:10:11,001 --> 00:10:12,350 Aah! What the heck?! 255 00:10:12,394 --> 00:10:16,267 Hello? How am I standing in space? [grunts] 256 00:10:16,311 --> 00:10:19,836 - [thudding, whooshing] - Huh? 257 00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:22,534 Ah. [laughs] 258 00:10:22,578 --> 00:10:25,102 Cloaked Bird-of-Prey. Wait. Did I steal this?! 259 00:10:25,146 --> 00:10:27,888 - Aah, Mark Twain's got a gun!-Billups! Oh, man, are you okay? 260 00:10:27,931 --> 00:10:30,412 -Tasha, no! The garbage bag's behind you! -Oh, no. 261 00:10:30,455 --> 00:10:32,283 Sir, you have nitrogen intoxication. 262 00:10:32,327 --> 00:10:33,850 You only have 60 seconds of air left! 263 00:10:33,894 --> 00:10:36,853 [panting, grunting] 264 00:10:36,897 --> 00:10:39,290 Stop goofing around! Get in here! 265 00:10:39,334 --> 00:10:40,833 Verifying update. System restart in ten seconds. 266 00:10:40,857 --> 00:10:44,295 - [yelling] - [mumbles] 267 00:10:44,339 --> 00:10:46,602 Watch it! No, no, no, over there! 268 00:10:46,646 --> 00:10:49,736 Stupid... cloaked Bird. 269 00:10:49,779 --> 00:10:51,694 [groaning] 270 00:10:51,738 --> 00:10:53,087 - Updating Klingon fonts. - What?! 271 00:10:53,130 --> 00:10:54,586 - Why do I even need that? - [beeping] 272 00:10:54,610 --> 00:10:56,090 SHAXS: Watch out for the controls! 273 00:10:56,133 --> 00:10:58,266 They're set to... 274 00:11:05,926 --> 00:11:07,971 [gasps] Gorn wedding! 275 00:11:08,015 --> 00:11:10,017 [growling] 276 00:11:10,060 --> 00:11:12,584 Aah! Get me out of here, implant! [groans] 277 00:11:12,628 --> 00:11:14,717 [laughs] Nice try, Gorns! 278 00:11:18,199 --> 00:11:19,809 [Rutherford sighs] 279 00:11:19,853 --> 00:11:21,506 [yells] It's still the Gorn wedding? 280 00:11:21,550 --> 00:11:24,466 Ouch. Help! Help! Come on, Gorns, please! 281 00:11:24,509 --> 00:11:25,772 CLAR: A Gorn wedding?! 282 00:11:25,815 --> 00:11:27,817 How has this become about a Gorn wedding?! 283 00:11:27,861 --> 00:11:29,471 What are you avoiding? 284 00:11:29,514 --> 00:11:30,883 Look, I'm just telling you the events 285 00:11:30,907 --> 00:11:33,040 of stardate 57791.1, all right? 286 00:11:33,083 --> 00:11:34,781 Damn. Rude. 287 00:11:34,824 --> 00:11:38,045 I want details on how you stole the Bird-of-Prey! 288 00:11:38,088 --> 00:11:39,307 I know, man. Me, too! 289 00:11:39,350 --> 00:11:41,048 Wait. Why would Shaxs make him steal 290 00:11:41,091 --> 00:11:43,485 some old Bird-of-Prey? What would they even do with that? 291 00:11:43,528 --> 00:11:46,444 Beats me. I mean, it could be for anything. 292 00:11:46,488 --> 00:11:48,272 Like, who even knows? [laughs] 293 00:11:48,316 --> 00:11:50,753 - Take him! - [whimpers] 294 00:11:50,797 --> 00:11:52,494 Eels?! 295 00:11:52,537 --> 00:11:53,930 Dude, are you not paying attention? 296 00:11:53,974 --> 00:11:56,106 - Hey! Leave them alone! - Oh? 297 00:11:56,150 --> 00:11:57,934 Well, perhaps you, Ensign D'vana Tendi, 298 00:11:57,978 --> 00:12:01,982 can prove more illuminating. 299 00:12:07,422 --> 00:12:09,337 Oh, I've always wanted to testify about stuff! 300 00:12:09,380 --> 00:12:10,904 This is so cool! 301 00:12:10,947 --> 00:12:12,340 Hi, everyone! 302 00:12:12,383 --> 00:12:13,776 Don't talk to them! 303 00:12:13,820 --> 00:12:16,387 Have you and Commander Jack Ransom 304 00:12:16,431 --> 00:12:19,042 ever set foot in the Romulan Neutral Zone? 305 00:12:19,086 --> 00:12:20,783 I can't tell you that. 306 00:12:20,827 --> 00:12:23,307 Oh, come on! This is an easy one! 307 00:12:23,351 --> 00:12:26,006 Why are you making this so difficult? 308 00:12:26,049 --> 00:12:28,486 -[yelling] -Tendi, just tell him what he wants! 309 00:12:28,530 --> 00:12:30,880 All right, fine! But this was a classified mission, 310 00:12:30,924 --> 00:12:32,839 so I'll have to leave some things out. 311 00:12:32,882 --> 00:12:36,364 I had just been given a major assignment. 312 00:12:36,407 --> 00:12:38,279 Mariner! Mariner, guess what? 313 00:12:38,322 --> 00:12:39,889 I get to tidy the conference rooms! 314 00:12:39,933 --> 00:12:41,630 Ah! What should I wear? 315 00:12:41,673 --> 00:12:43,371 Probably just my uniform, right? 316 00:12:43,414 --> 00:12:45,460 Ugh! How are you so excited? 317 00:12:45,503 --> 00:12:47,767 You know you're just gonna be wiping cat fur off chairs. 318 00:12:47,810 --> 00:12:48,874 Uh, do you know how many big decisions happen 319 00:12:48,898 --> 00:12:50,160 in those conference rooms? 320 00:12:50,204 --> 00:12:51,485 That's where they talk about the Borg. 321 00:12:51,509 --> 00:12:52,922 You can talk about the Borg anywhere. 322 00:12:52,946 --> 00:12:55,252 Yeah, but when you do it in a conference room, 323 00:12:55,296 --> 00:12:58,168 it becomes a conference. 324 00:12:58,212 --> 00:13:01,432 [groans] I never get to clean the conference room. 325 00:13:01,476 --> 00:13:03,434 [humming] 326 00:13:03,478 --> 00:13:05,785 [gasps] Wow. 327 00:13:05,828 --> 00:13:07,525 The captain's chair. 328 00:13:07,569 --> 00:13:09,832 Oh, I'm gonna make you extra clean. Huh? 329 00:13:09,876 --> 00:13:11,703 Secure the room, Lieutenant [bleep]. 330 00:13:11,747 --> 00:13:13,836 - Yes, sir. - CLAR: Okay, stop. 331 00:13:13,880 --> 00:13:16,186 You can't omit details like that! 332 00:13:16,230 --> 00:13:18,754 Yeah, but I already did, so... 333 00:13:18,798 --> 00:13:20,756 Are you so stubborn 334 00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:23,541 that you're willing to risk death by eels? 335 00:13:23,585 --> 00:13:25,282 Yes, that's correct. 336 00:13:25,326 --> 00:13:27,894 Then continue. 337 00:13:27,937 --> 00:13:30,461 You must be The Cleaner. 338 00:13:30,505 --> 00:13:32,681 Yes, sirree. And happy to be here. 339 00:13:32,724 --> 00:13:34,944 Glad to have you. This mission is highly classified. 340 00:13:34,988 --> 00:13:36,511 From here on out, you're [bleep] 341 00:13:36,554 --> 00:13:38,382 - and [bleep]. - Wow. 342 00:13:38,426 --> 00:13:39,925 All right, everybody, listen up. I'm serious. 343 00:13:39,949 --> 00:13:41,690 This is important. If we're captured... 344 00:13:41,733 --> 00:13:43,692 TENDI: He's glad to have me! 345 00:13:43,735 --> 00:13:46,869 Gosh, it's just so nice to be recognized for my work. 346 00:13:46,913 --> 00:13:49,567 And cleaning the conference room is important. I knew it. 347 00:13:49,611 --> 00:13:51,221 Wait, I should be paying attention. 348 00:13:51,265 --> 00:13:53,397 This is why we got matching tattoos. 349 00:13:53,441 --> 00:13:54,921 - 10-4. - Lock and load. 350 00:13:54,964 --> 00:13:56,792 We're [bleep] for life. 351 00:13:56,836 --> 00:13:58,359 Check out this map. It's gonna lead us 352 00:13:58,402 --> 00:14:00,883 straight into the Neutral Z... [bleep] ...one. 353 00:14:00,927 --> 00:14:02,363 The Neutral what, now? 354 00:14:02,406 --> 00:14:03,731 RANSOM: The package is located here. 355 00:14:03,755 --> 00:14:06,367 Guards are stationed here and here on weekends. 356 00:14:06,410 --> 00:14:09,152 If we run into trouble, Cleaner will extract us. 357 00:14:09,196 --> 00:14:11,154 Let's [bleep] this [bleep] up! 358 00:14:11,198 --> 00:14:13,548 [whooping, hollering] 359 00:14:13,591 --> 00:14:14,984 [whoops] Yeah... 360 00:14:15,028 --> 00:14:18,074 Phaser rifles. [chuckles] 361 00:14:18,118 --> 00:14:20,381 RUTHERFORD: Oh, snap! That's the ship from my story! 362 00:14:20,424 --> 00:14:22,228 TENDI: [sighs] I knew I should have made it clear 363 00:14:22,252 --> 00:14:23,577 that I wasn't supposed to be there, 364 00:14:23,601 --> 00:14:25,734 but every time I was about to... 365 00:14:25,777 --> 00:14:28,041 So, here is a very funny thing. 366 00:14:28,084 --> 00:14:31,740 Um, I think that there was a misunderstanding, 367 00:14:31,783 --> 00:14:34,438 -and I... -Everyone quiet! They're scanning the area. 368 00:14:37,964 --> 00:14:39,704 - Ah... - That was close. 369 00:14:39,748 --> 00:14:41,378 We're lucky we have this Bird-of-Prey, or we'd be toast. 370 00:14:41,402 --> 00:14:42,794 Uh, but what I was saying was... 371 00:14:42,838 --> 00:14:44,622 Shh! They're scanning again. 372 00:14:46,929 --> 00:14:48,844 They stopped scanning. Cleaner, what was that? 373 00:14:48,888 --> 00:14:52,108 - What I was saying was... - Oh, no, they're scanning! 374 00:14:52,152 --> 00:14:53,936 Okay, now they're not scanning anymore. 375 00:14:53,980 --> 00:14:55,653 - Anything important... Whoa! - What I was... 376 00:14:55,677 --> 00:14:57,331 REDACTED: Stop! I'm picking up scanning! 377 00:14:57,374 --> 00:14:59,202 Okay, they're done scanning. Oh, God! 378 00:14:59,246 --> 00:15:00,682 They're scanning again! 379 00:15:00,725 --> 00:15:01,857 No, no. That was on me. 380 00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:03,990 That was wrong. No, I wasn't! 381 00:15:04,033 --> 00:15:05,339 [grumbles] 382 00:15:10,387 --> 00:15:12,694 Uh, so, a-about me being "the cleaner..." 383 00:15:12,737 --> 00:15:15,740 Yeah, yeah. At your age, it's very impressive. 384 00:15:18,526 --> 00:15:20,832 Comm silence from here on out. 385 00:15:20,876 --> 00:15:23,226 [exhales] 386 00:15:23,270 --> 00:15:25,968 TENDI: Whoa. 387 00:15:26,012 --> 00:15:28,928 - You know who I hate? Remans. - Oh, they're the worst. 388 00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:30,079 - [both shouting] - TENDI: Sorry. 389 00:15:30,103 --> 00:15:31,495 [blows landing] 390 00:15:31,539 --> 00:15:33,715 Apologizing to the enemy? 391 00:15:33,758 --> 00:15:35,630 - That's cold, Cleaner. - You're playing 392 00:15:35,673 --> 00:15:38,154 some real [bleep] up mind games. 393 00:15:44,987 --> 00:15:46,728 - Stay here, cover our six. - Six what? 394 00:15:46,771 --> 00:15:47,947 Copy. 395 00:15:50,340 --> 00:15:51,341 [thudding] 396 00:15:53,474 --> 00:15:54,649 Is that the package? 397 00:15:54,692 --> 00:15:57,217 Cleaner, do your thing! 398 00:15:57,260 --> 00:15:59,021 What's my thing? I have a thing? What's my thing?! 399 00:15:59,045 --> 00:16:01,525 [yelling] 400 00:16:05,051 --> 00:16:07,183 Whoa, I thought she was just supposed to beam us 401 00:16:07,227 --> 00:16:08,924 - out of here. - She was. 402 00:16:08,968 --> 00:16:11,840 I do not know what's going on here. This is crazy. 403 00:16:12,884 --> 00:16:14,495 Congrats, boys. 404 00:16:14,538 --> 00:16:16,410 The package is safely on board, 405 00:16:16,453 --> 00:16:18,629 and there's no indication that the Rom... [bleep] 406 00:16:18,673 --> 00:16:21,023 ulan high council detected us. 407 00:16:21,067 --> 00:16:22,503 - [cheering, whooping] - Yeah! 408 00:16:22,546 --> 00:16:24,244 - [laughs] - [door whooshes open] 409 00:16:24,287 --> 00:16:27,116 Too bad we have to deny this ever happened, 410 00:16:27,160 --> 00:16:29,118 because you were awesome. 411 00:16:29,162 --> 00:16:30,772 [bleeping] 412 00:16:30,815 --> 00:16:32,730 [laughing]: You, 413 00:16:32,774 --> 00:16:34,645 you're [bleep] crazy. 414 00:16:35,646 --> 00:16:37,170 [door whooshes shut] 415 00:16:37,213 --> 00:16:40,173 [sighs, humming] 416 00:16:40,216 --> 00:16:42,653 [gasps] This is where Billups sits. 417 00:16:42,697 --> 00:16:43,698 CLAR: Stop! 418 00:16:43,741 --> 00:16:45,395 You expect me to believe that? 419 00:16:45,439 --> 00:16:47,310 Yes, that is where Billups sits. 420 00:16:47,354 --> 00:16:49,834 You did not do martial arts 421 00:16:49,878 --> 00:16:51,793 on multiple armed guards! 422 00:16:51,836 --> 00:16:54,665 You're right. I didn't. 423 00:16:54,709 --> 00:16:57,755 - [clears throat] - I tried to be reasonable. 424 00:16:57,799 --> 00:16:59,148 I tried to get to the truth. 425 00:16:59,192 --> 00:17:02,151 Today didn't have to end in eels! 426 00:17:02,195 --> 00:17:05,198 - Ignite the burners! - [Boimler and Tendi scream] 427 00:17:05,241 --> 00:17:07,200 [all screaming] 428 00:17:07,243 --> 00:17:08,984 - [eels shrieking] - Oh! 429 00:17:09,028 --> 00:17:12,161 Why would you have burners andeels? It's redundant! 430 00:17:16,470 --> 00:17:20,517 Just tell me about the package. What was inside the package? 431 00:17:20,561 --> 00:17:23,259 I don't know, but whatever it was, I'm sure it was great. 432 00:17:23,303 --> 00:17:25,044 [eels shrieking] 433 00:17:25,087 --> 00:17:27,089 I think you're hurting the eels! 434 00:17:27,133 --> 00:17:30,266 CLAR: This can all be over if you just tell me 435 00:17:30,310 --> 00:17:31,876 what your bridge crew did! 436 00:17:31,920 --> 00:17:33,269 We can't tell you. 437 00:17:33,313 --> 00:17:35,054 Why? Why? 438 00:17:35,097 --> 00:17:36,359 Because we don't know! 439 00:17:36,403 --> 00:17:37,882 We never know anything! 440 00:17:37,926 --> 00:17:38,927 [murmuring] 441 00:17:40,624 --> 00:17:41,756 We're lower decks. 442 00:17:41,799 --> 00:17:43,714 No one ever tells us what's going on. 443 00:17:43,758 --> 00:17:44,976 We're not important enough 444 00:17:45,020 --> 00:17:46,500 to have anything to lie to you about. 445 00:17:46,543 --> 00:17:49,068 You're Starfleet. Surely you must be briefed 446 00:17:49,111 --> 00:17:50,199 on every contingency. 447 00:17:50,243 --> 00:17:52,158 Yeah, I wish. The senior officers 448 00:17:52,201 --> 00:17:54,029 don't always have time to keep us up to speed. 449 00:17:54,073 --> 00:17:56,771 Hell, sometimes, they don't even know what's going on. 450 00:17:56,814 --> 00:17:58,512 Impossible! 451 00:17:58,555 --> 00:18:00,122 Human lies! 452 00:18:00,166 --> 00:18:03,995 - [grunting] - You are the best of the best! 453 00:18:04,039 --> 00:18:05,780 - [screams] - Your senior officers 454 00:18:05,823 --> 00:18:08,522 are always in full control! 455 00:18:08,565 --> 00:18:11,438 No, they're not. They mess up all the time. 456 00:18:11,481 --> 00:18:14,267 - Like whenever Q shows up. - [all gasp] 457 00:18:14,310 --> 00:18:15,964 Voilร ! 458 00:18:17,966 --> 00:18:20,055 - Oh, what? - Damn you, Q! 459 00:18:20,099 --> 00:18:24,059 Good luck solving my little puzzle, mes amis. 460 00:18:24,103 --> 00:18:27,802 Tell me, now, can you prove that humanity is worth saving? 461 00:18:27,845 --> 00:18:30,413 I think not. [laughing] 462 00:18:32,198 --> 00:18:34,548 Well, he clearly wants us 463 00:18:34,591 --> 00:18:36,332 to play something. 464 00:18:36,376 --> 00:18:38,639 Ah! It's soccer. Okay. 465 00:18:38,682 --> 00:18:40,945 -Oh! -BALL: What's humanity all about? 466 00:18:40,989 --> 00:18:42,904 It's puzzle time. It's puzzle time. 467 00:18:42,947 --> 00:18:46,560 - Ugh. Any ideas? Anybody? - Oh! 468 00:18:46,603 --> 00:18:48,257 BOIMLER: Or half of Ransom's alien dates 469 00:18:48,301 --> 00:18:49,824 that he doesn't do any research for. 470 00:18:49,867 --> 00:18:52,305 [laughs] You are so funny, Mary Anne. 471 00:18:52,348 --> 00:18:54,568 How about we keep this party going in my quarters? 472 00:18:54,611 --> 00:18:57,136 Hey. Hey, Jack. FYI, you're hitting on a salt vampire. 473 00:18:57,179 --> 00:18:58,722 -[scoffs] Yeah, right. Nice try.-[growls] 474 00:18:58,746 --> 00:19:00,965 Salt vampires died out more than a century ago. 475 00:19:01,009 --> 00:19:03,272 - All right. Cool, be safe. - Come on, Mary Anne. 476 00:19:03,316 --> 00:19:04,491 Let's get out of here. 477 00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:07,885 I'll give you the tour of casa de Ransom. 478 00:19:07,929 --> 00:19:10,018 - [Mary Anne growls] - [screams] Salt vampire! 479 00:19:10,061 --> 00:19:12,107 - CLAR: You're making this up. - BOIMLER: Nuh-uh. 480 00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:14,303 I read all their logs. They're stepping in it all the time. 481 00:19:14,327 --> 00:19:16,242 [panting] Captain. Captain! 482 00:19:16,285 --> 00:19:18,069 Someone is replacing everyone on the ship 483 00:19:18,113 --> 00:19:20,202 with imposters who claim not to know me. 484 00:19:20,246 --> 00:19:21,943 We might be in a parallel dimension. 485 00:19:21,986 --> 00:19:23,727 - And you are? - Uh... 486 00:19:23,771 --> 00:19:26,077 Wait, is this... is this not the Cerritos? 487 00:19:26,121 --> 00:19:29,342 This is the Alhambra. Did you get on the wrong ship? 488 00:19:29,385 --> 00:19:32,258 [bleep] They all look the same! 489 00:19:33,302 --> 00:19:34,999 Who the hell was that? 490 00:19:35,043 --> 00:19:36,871 Why are you doing this to me? 491 00:19:36,914 --> 00:19:38,351 I need you to tell me 492 00:19:38,394 --> 00:19:41,310 that your senior officers are infallible heroes. 493 00:19:41,354 --> 00:19:43,921 Well, they're not. And that's okay. 494 00:19:43,965 --> 00:19:45,314 We all joined Starfleet 495 00:19:45,358 --> 00:19:47,316 to dive headfirst into the unknown. 496 00:19:47,360 --> 00:19:48,665 We're explorers. 497 00:19:48,709 --> 00:19:50,885 Of course we don't always know what's going on. 498 00:19:50,928 --> 00:19:52,452 Did Picard know about the Borg? 499 00:19:52,495 --> 00:19:55,542 Did Kirk know about that giant Spock on Phylos? 500 00:19:55,585 --> 00:19:58,022 Did Dr. Crusher know about that ghost in the lamp thing 501 00:19:58,066 --> 00:19:59,565 from the Scottish planet that she hooked up with 502 00:19:59,589 --> 00:20:01,069 that one time? That whole thing. 503 00:20:01,112 --> 00:20:03,376 You clearly want us to say that the captain 504 00:20:03,419 --> 00:20:04,725 and her crew messed up, 505 00:20:04,768 --> 00:20:06,944 but we simply don't have the full story, 506 00:20:06,988 --> 00:20:08,685 and that's the truth! 507 00:20:08,729 --> 00:20:11,601 Whatever they did, I guarantee you it was all for good. 508 00:20:11,645 --> 00:20:14,038 You have shown no evidence that they're guilty of a crime. 509 00:20:14,082 --> 00:20:15,866 In fact, I find youguilty 510 00:20:15,910 --> 00:20:18,913 of trying to take them down with this sham of a trial! 511 00:20:18,956 --> 00:20:20,219 Drumhead! 512 00:20:22,133 --> 00:20:25,180 Wait, you think this is a trial? 513 00:20:25,224 --> 00:20:26,964 Uh, yes? 514 00:20:27,008 --> 00:20:28,246 -It's not? -Yeah, I mean, it's pretty trial-y. 515 00:20:28,270 --> 00:20:29,663 Could someone bring up the lights? 516 00:20:33,232 --> 00:20:34,668 This isn't a trial. 517 00:20:34,711 --> 00:20:37,236 It's a party, for this brave crew 518 00:20:37,279 --> 00:20:39,673 who rescued me from the Romulans. 519 00:20:39,716 --> 00:20:40,891 What? 520 00:20:40,935 --> 00:20:43,329 CLAR: I was kidnapped by Romulans 521 00:20:43,372 --> 00:20:46,157 and held for over a year until they saved me. 522 00:20:46,201 --> 00:20:49,726 Imperium Magistrate Clar, you'resafe now, aboard the Cerritos. 523 00:20:49,770 --> 00:20:52,990 Thank you, Captain Freeman. Thank you. 524 00:20:53,034 --> 00:20:56,342 You must come and celebrate with me on K'Tuevon Prime. 525 00:20:56,385 --> 00:20:59,780 Your deeds and my victory will forever be etched 526 00:20:59,823 --> 00:21:03,044 - onto our great history stone. - Can't say no to a party. 527 00:21:03,087 --> 00:21:05,438 Oh, great, guess I'll have to shave my [bleep]. 528 00:21:05,481 --> 00:21:06,743 Yeah, maybe you should. 529 00:21:06,787 --> 00:21:08,571 [laughter] 530 00:21:08,615 --> 00:21:10,312 [scoffs] What's that about? 531 00:21:10,356 --> 00:21:12,227 I don't know, man. Something dumb. 532 00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:14,229 [both laugh] 533 00:21:14,273 --> 00:21:16,971 This was supposed to be my special day. 534 00:21:17,014 --> 00:21:18,427 No. No, no, no, no, no. This is a trial. 535 00:21:18,451 --> 00:21:19,843 You said we were witnesses, 536 00:21:19,887 --> 00:21:22,106 - you said we had to testify. - Are you stupid? 537 00:21:22,150 --> 00:21:23,978 How could you think this was a trial? 538 00:21:24,021 --> 00:21:27,416 Because you've got our bosses suspended in a scary-ass beam. 539 00:21:27,460 --> 00:21:30,071 That is the beam of celebration! 540 00:21:30,114 --> 00:21:32,465 It is an honor to be in this beam. 541 00:21:32,508 --> 00:21:33,640 Shut up, Billups! 542 00:21:33,683 --> 00:21:35,163 Hey, man, this is not on us. 543 00:21:35,206 --> 00:21:38,122 I mean, all of that chanting, and the-the metal gavel? 544 00:21:38,166 --> 00:21:39,994 This is, like, alien trial 101. 545 00:21:40,037 --> 00:21:42,736 You raised us up on a platform into a creepy courtroom. 546 00:21:42,779 --> 00:21:45,304 Creepy? This is one of our nicest event silos. 547 00:21:45,347 --> 00:21:47,828 -I got married here! -Wh... Well, then, who's this judge? 548 00:21:47,871 --> 00:21:50,831 This guy's just been, like, scowling at us the whole time. 549 00:21:50,874 --> 00:21:53,050 - I don't know him.-Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm just here 550 00:21:53,094 --> 00:21:55,096 to set up for a birthday later for my little girl. 551 00:21:55,139 --> 00:21:57,403 - She's turning 100. - TENDI: Aw. 552 00:21:57,446 --> 00:22:00,188 Okay, all right, Clar, time's up. 553 00:22:00,231 --> 00:22:02,277 - Etchers down. - But-but... 554 00:22:02,321 --> 00:22:04,148 we didn't even get to do any etching. 555 00:22:04,192 --> 00:22:07,238 No, no, no, no. You only paid for 22 minutes. 556 00:22:07,282 --> 00:22:08,631 Other people got to etch. 557 00:22:08,675 --> 00:22:10,067 Oh, come on. 558 00:22:10,111 --> 00:22:12,089 But-but wh... Okay, what about, what about the eels? 559 00:22:12,113 --> 00:22:14,420 You held us in contempt, of eels. 560 00:22:14,463 --> 00:22:16,117 All right, come on. That's enough. 561 00:22:16,160 --> 00:22:17,355 - You dipped us in eels! - You ruined my party! 562 00:22:17,379 --> 00:22:19,163 Those were eels you dipped us in! 563 00:22:19,207 --> 00:22:21,167 - You did that! You did it! - You ruined my party! 564 00:22:23,298 --> 00:22:26,780 Today you four almost got yourselves killed 565 00:22:26,823 --> 00:22:28,521 at a thank-you dinner. 566 00:22:28,564 --> 00:22:30,305 But, the way you stood up for Starfleet 567 00:22:30,349 --> 00:22:32,022 while you thought you were staring death in the face 568 00:22:32,046 --> 00:22:34,004 deserves commendation. 569 00:22:34,048 --> 00:22:36,180 - I guess. - [applause] 570 00:22:37,443 --> 00:22:38,879 Going forward, we'll make an effort 571 00:22:38,922 --> 00:22:40,794 to keep the crew more informed. 572 00:22:40,837 --> 00:22:43,884 The Cerritoswill be synonymous with clarity. 573 00:22:43,927 --> 00:22:46,060 Wait, so then what did Clar do to get captured 574 00:22:46,103 --> 00:22:48,323 by the Romulans? I-I missed that part. 575 00:22:48,367 --> 00:22:49,977 [chuckles] Well, it's-it's complicated. 576 00:22:50,020 --> 00:22:52,153 Why did you let him hurt us with eels 577 00:22:52,196 --> 00:22:54,242 if you knew it wasn't a trial? 578 00:22:54,285 --> 00:22:56,549 We have to honor the local customs of alien governments. 579 00:22:56,592 --> 00:22:58,135 And can you tell me who was on that secret team 580 00:22:58,159 --> 00:22:59,354 that infiltrated the Neutral Zone? 581 00:22:59,378 --> 00:23:01,467 Uh, I'm not at liberty to... 582 00:23:01,510 --> 00:23:03,358 And why couldn't you just ask the Vulcans to borrow 583 00:23:03,382 --> 00:23:04,707 the Bird-of-Prey? And where did they get it? 584 00:23:04,731 --> 00:23:06,472 And why was that a job for the Cerritos? 585 00:23:06,515 --> 00:23:08,058 Why couldn't it have just beena job for, like, the Enterprise, 586 00:23:08,082 --> 00:23:09,755 -or... -Okay, you know what? It's classified. 587 00:23:09,779 --> 00:23:11,651 It's all classified. Dismissed! 588 00:23:11,694 --> 00:23:14,349 Hey, everybody, look, we got Captain Clarity over here. 589 00:23:14,393 --> 00:23:16,090 I said dismissed! 590 00:23:16,133 --> 00:23:19,615 Honestly, this is fine with me. Knowing things means more work. 591 00:23:19,659 --> 00:23:22,226 Well, I, for one, knew it was a party the whole time. 592 00:23:22,270 --> 00:23:23,619 [scoffs] Yeah, right, dude. 593 00:23:23,663 --> 00:23:25,273 - I did. - Then why were you crying? 594 00:23:25,316 --> 00:23:27,275 I just... i-it was cold in there. 595 00:23:27,318 --> 00:23:29,582 I've got sensitive corneas. I told you. 596 00:23:29,625 --> 00:23:31,322 [laughs] 597 00:23:31,366 --> 00:23:33,324 I challenge you all to a duel. 598 00:23:33,368 --> 00:23:34,500 Pick your weapons. 599 00:23:34,543 --> 00:23:36,153 I pick the mind. 600 00:23:36,197 --> 00:23:37,285 Get out of here, Q! No. 601 00:23:37,328 --> 00:23:38,765 We are done with random stuff today. 602 00:23:38,808 --> 00:23:40,810 We're not dealing with any of your Q bull[bleep]. 603 00:23:40,854 --> 00:23:42,246 Oh, s'il vous plaรฎt, Mariner. 604 00:23:42,290 --> 00:23:44,205 I want to put humanity to the ultimate test. 605 00:23:44,248 --> 00:23:45,530 MARINER: Okay, I'm not French. No. 606 00:23:45,554 --> 00:23:47,295 - Go find Picard. - Q: Oh, Picard. 607 00:23:47,338 --> 00:23:49,645 He's no fun, he's always quoting Shakespeare, 608 00:23:49,689 --> 00:23:51,647 he's always making wine. 609 00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:29,760 Captioned by Media Access Group at WGBH access.wgbh.org 610 00:25:16,210 --> 00:25:17,646 [man imitates weapons firing] 611 00:25:19,648 --> 00:25:20,649 Chirp. 45687

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