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Come with me to a bygone era,

when values were imbued with charming nonchalance

and blithe simplicity.

It was a happy era, characterized by insouciance.

People abandoned themselves to the flow of happenstance,

without caring where they'd end up.

Benjamin Rathery exemplified this.

Madame...

there's nothing wrong.

Do something anyway.

Good.

Leeches?

No?

I shall apply the cups.

You're right.

Your back is too pretty for cups.

But what shall I do? What shall I do?

Nothing.

Nothing, of course.

A doctor does well enough by not killing the patient.

My husband disagrees.

Dear old Dr Fata. True, he kills quite a few.

But I'm fond of him.

Next to him, I feel handsome.

You're more than handsome.

I believe you're right.

I'm cheerful,

POOL

witty,

not too foolish,

affectionate,

vigorous,

ardent...

and rushed!

THE ADVENTURES OF UNCLE BENJAMIN

Benjamin!

- Manette, how awful! - What's the matter?

You're a virgin.

Don't mention that.

You must be attached to the silly little thing.

Not that much.

- So? - Marry me.

Virgins have one-track minds. How dull!

- My father... - That thief!

His Chablis is terribly dear!

He told me you only wanted my flower.

He calls it your "nest egg", as if it were a treasure.

Your only dowry.

Very well. I'll kidnap you.

- And marry me? - Again!

No kidnapping, then.

I'm too exhausted anyway. I had to apply leeches today.

Well!

- Is the company here? - Yes. A motley crew of drunks.

Devoted to a philosophy of drunkenness.

Drunks!

Gentlemen, do you know

that people are saying we are drunken louts?

You, Dr Minxit, my esteemed colleague from Corvol,

are you a drunk?

Parlenta, the only poet-bailiff in the land,

a drunk?

"Let's sing

"And laugh, and raise a din Let's drink until the night's all in

"When the sun peeps over the horizon May it find us still carousing"

Bravo!

And you, Machecourt, my excellent brother-in-law,

apple of my sister's eye,

are you a drunk?

Never!

As for you, dear Mr Fata,

with such a lovely wife,

are you a mere drunk? - Slander!

Bow down, Christians! Bow down...

My dear friends!

Men of hearty appetite, keg-drainers, let me tell you.

Drunkenness is a blessing from Heaven.

Drunkenness... and bachelorhood!

And I am a drunken bachelor!

Benjamin, you're joking about bachelorhood.

I assure you I am not.

Marriage may be good.

My daughter's home from the convent. You must come visit us.

I go from patient to patient.

- Please, do come. - When I have the time.

For forty years now, I've examined urine.

I've just learned to distinguish transparent urine

from cloudy stuff.

Yet I am a rich man.

So take my advice.

Marry Arabelle

and inherit my practice.

I could die in peace.

Don't be in such a rush.

Does Arabelle still make you that lovely cream cheese?

Cream cheese,

fish stew,

roast capon,

and all the rest...

A woman who is a good cook makes an excellent wife.

Machecourt, you can't hold your liquor.

At the cabaret, the menu is more varied,

and you can run up a bill.

Quite right. Here it is!

Clumsy lout! I'm defending your business.

You're insulting your sister, mother of five little Machecourts.

Your wife, you mean?

- You spurn her cooking. - She's a wonderful cook.

- But you prefer the cabaret. - Did I say that?

Yes, you did. Take it back!

She's my sister.

And my wife.

Quite right.

I accept

Since the only sword we have is mine,

you may have it. I'll take Mr Minxit's cane.

- Let's share. - As always.

MY ham!

I killed him. Wretched am I!

The Machecourt girls have lost their uncle.

Come on!

"Ye brothers who live on after us

"Think not ill of what we did

"if you pity us for our failings,

"God will have mercy upon us."

Drunken curs! Go home!

- My dear woman... - Go home! Right now!

Wine and women, where do they lead?

- To a pauper's grave. - But I shall rescue you.

Since Mr Minxit wills it, you shall marry Arabelle.

Ask her for her hand.

There you are, Mr Rathery.

You must make haste to Sambert. My son is very ill.

Sambert... Halfway to Heaven.

- I'll come tomorrow. - Please come tonight,

or the priest must come tomorrow.

- My son has a carbuncle. - You cannot pay the fee.

I believe that's my business.

Did you hear? Miss Arabelle will wait.

Let's have a drink...

You drunk! Go straight home.

What will become of that one?

Your name...?

Gaspard.

Do you rob birds' nests?

Yes, sir.

Make slingshots?

Yes, sir.

- Catch crayfish? - Yes, sir.

Just like me, at your age.

Do you know how to read?

Big letters.

Write?

Count?

It's hard.

Don't worry. I never learned myself.

I was just like you, as a boy.

Are you leaving, sir?

Hector de Pont-Cassé, of the Royal Chamber.

Guillaume de Vallombreuse, of His Majesty's Guard.

Benjamin Rathery, doctor of Clamecy.

Gaspard, robber of birds' nests.

My sword misled you. I am not a nobleman.

Nobility doesn't tempt me.

Honestly, what worth do you attach

to those two letters preceding your name?

Will the "de" preserve you from colic?

It won't, will it? So?

At your service!

- Should we correct him? - Never mind.

Insolent...

Yes. But it's so rare.

What is that, may I ask?

Gaspard.

Listen.

Go to my bedroom.

Lie down and sleep. You need it desperately.

Who is that?

The son of the poor devil who died last night.

And the old lady?

Gone back to the village to starve.

What does all this mean?

Simply that Gaspard now lives with us.

Listen, Benjamin, it's impossible.

- Or else you've lost your mind! - I know.

Another mouth to feed... But I'll manage.

- It's not just the money. - He has many skills.

If he shows some talent, we'll make a doctor of him.

He'll have my practice.

What practice?

Your five daughters need a brother.

I need a nephew and you need a son. Accept him!

You're too kind!

- Little sister... - Leave me alone!

You know... I couldn't leave him up there.

You mustn't be so generous when you have creditors.

If a man has credit, it's as if he were rich.

To get me back on my feet, we need a good little epidemic.

God is good...

Get married.

Why should I marry? Mironton, mirontaine!

Minxit longs to bestow his daughter on you.

She's very pretty.

I've seen her from afar. Nice enough, but flat.

Flat? Take a better look.

It's sweet to have a plump young wife in bed,

eager to please you...

Marry Arabelle. It's time you settled down.

And inherit Minxit's practice.

I don't want to end up as a country doctor.

I'm curious about the world.

- I know how you'll end up. - In a pauper's grave!

No tears, please!

Very well. I'll go see Mr Minxit. But only to please you.

I'll go with you. That'll double your pluck.

Darling Parlenta!

Have you come to sing us, Bow down, Christians, bow down?

Alas, this is no time for songs and glee!

Your impatient creditors have hired me...

God wash me! A poem!

The rhyme should soften the blow

Of the rude duty that is my trow.

Tell us more. But first, taste this Volnay.

Ah! Well, since it's Volnay...

- It's pert. - Don't worry, I've two kegs.

Purchased on credit, naturally.

And that is what leads me to your humble abode

My heart is heavy with the bailiffs load

But I must warn you that on the morrow,

I'll seize your assets, despite my sorrow.

- What's he saying? - What's this mumbo-jumbo?

Benjamin, your creditors are restless.

You haven't paid a bill for the past three years!

Is it my fault people are healthy?

I warn you. I'll return tomorrow.

Officially, next time. Escorted by two officers.

I'm growing old.

- Shall we quit the game? - As you like, Father.

- Don't you want to sit down? - No. Let's take a walk.

Arabelle, my girl, now that you've left the convent,

life awaits you.

Life is a long journey...

That's why one must choose

one's companion

wisely and carefully.

Do you remember my young colleague who is nevertheless an old friend,

Benjamin Rathery?

Two gentlemen would like to present their salutations.

The Vicomte de Pont-Cassé

and the Chevalier de Vallombreuse.

Mr de Pont-Cassé?

I read his father's urine, but we've never been fast friends.

Sabine's brother...

Sabine was my best friend.

She often spoke of him

and we occasionally exchanged greetings.

In that case, let them in.

Oh, this fat commoner!

He looks so smug!

Mr Minxit will see the Vicomte and the Chevalier.

It is a delight to meet the man who took such good care

of my beloved father.

And who also sired the fair Miss Arabelle.

My sister Sabine's praises

have given me such a desire to meet her.

I managed to flee Versailles.

His Majesty is stopping at Chambord.

I accepted an invitation to hunt

from the Marquis de Cambyse, lord of Clamecy.

My friend, de Vallombreuse, accompanied me.

It is so kind of you to visit our home.

Please have some of my champagne.

Just a few seconds, please.

Vallombreuse... Do you still like roses?

Roses? Who, me?

Yes, you. I see some lovely ones in the garden.

Ah! You mean those roses!

Oh, yes, indeed. Indeed they are superb.

Are you ready?

Hit me on the back.

Harder! You idiots!

Oh, Mr Parlenta!

I tell you, her bosoms are a feast for the eye!

- Her husband won't be bored. - It won't do him much good.

No fooling, eh?

I promised Bettine to take you to Arabelle's.

Cambyse is shooting.

Usually, he hawks or lays on the hounds.

I believe I know that voice. Wait.

Help!

Get the hell out! I'm Cambyse's officer.

This maiden was trespassing.

You're mistaken, my friend. She is no maiden,

but that's no reason.

I'll have you beaten, peasant.

Just you wait!

You are so strong, yet so tender at times.

Stealing grass from one of France's richest men!

I didn't know I was on his land.

What are you doing?

You're right. It's silly.

Fontenoy!

Bull's eye, Fontenoy!

What's the trouble?

This hound is worrying my calves.

Come now, Fontenoy!

What do you say to that?

I return to Corvol after 25 years in the royal armies,

and I must poach for food for Fontenoy and myself.

- Fontenoy? - That's his name!

At the battle of Fontenoy, he captured an Englishman

by nipping his heels.

His Majesty was kind enough to say,

"Sergeant, you've an excellent animal there."

But I wasn't promoted.

They'd never make an officer of a saddler's son.

Were I a nobleman...

Nobility is the emptiest thing in the world.

People who bow down to it are imbeciles.

Well said! Just think, I followed Marshal de Saxe everywhere!

From woman to woman! I got more than him.

And he was lively!

Those Polish girls...

Are you single?

Oh, yes! The world is too full of pretty tails.

I feel the same way.

Why marry!

Benjamin, they're expecting us.

May we invite this man and his beast to Manette's?

We promised Bettine!

You don't often meet a dog who captured an Englishman.

- Are you willing? - A real meal? At the inn?

Hell, sure!

What about you, Fontenoy?

Silence is consent. Three against one.

Majority rules, with an iron hand.

Ten philosophers against 11 fools: the fools win.

So, what about Polish girls...

Look out. They're not the only kind.

There are also Flemish girls.

Those Flemish girls!

Gentlemen! And dear hound!

Allow me to embrace our pretty hostess.

She's going to cook a fine meal for us.

You're all dressed up for Miss Arabelle!

Go kiss her, not me!

Come along, men. I'll order the meal.

Kiss Arabelle! You must be mad!

Why do you think I come here so often?

Because you want me.

I want you, too, Benjamin.

When we're married, you'll see.

Let go. You're burning me.

I like you.

I feel like a Maypole with you climbing me.

If Heaven would allow me to stay here forever,

I know no better way to spend Eternity.

Will you order the meal? Mr Minxit is waiting.

Quite right.

Dinnertime!

Your poor Benjamin is a bit tipsy...

I'll never reach Corvol in this condition.

I can offer you two strong arms

spared by the cannon.

My arms are fine, but as for the legs...

Don't fear for your virtue. This is the best I can do.

Forward march! Lift her skirts, and give us a look at her legs.

While the cat's away...

Until you come along.

Go to your room. If I catch you again with that rascal...

who craves your flower...

Virginity is no laughing matter.

Oh, yes it is, sir. The Marshal de Saxe used to say:

"A virgin is like a bottle.

"Don't give up until you see the bottom."

That's a joke, isn't it?

Drunken curs!

I've ridden in from Corvol, where Mr Minxit waited all day.

Well done, Machecourt!

To think I let that Wino father five daughters on me!

Five virgins! Damn!

Machecourt is not to blame, my darling sister.

The truth is that we met this illustrious soldier

and his no less illustrious companion.

Soldiers give their blood for our country.

We owed him a lunch, at least.

Minxit paced back and forth waiting for you!

He shall wait no longer. Let's go, Machecourt.

In this condition? You're mad, Benjamin.

Minxit will hear from you another day.

- I'll go with you. - No!

I promised to see him today.

No, no, no! Besides... Mr Chapelle is asking for you.

Pretty Madame Chapelle's husband? That cuckold!

I'll bleed him like a pig!

Come on!

Bring me the patient! It's time to bleed him!

I love to bleed cuckolds.

Quiet, Benjamin.

- Husband not here? - No, he's in Nevers.

I didn't know.

- But he spoke of a pain in his side. - True...

The poor man does suffer.

And I don't feel well.

But that's not Mr Chapelle.

It's his pretty wife.

I don't want to bleed her. No, I don't.

Benjamin will cure you. He could heal a wooden leg.

Take good care of this big dolt.

What time is it?

Where's my patient?

Here.

But... I don't want to bleed you, I tell you.

Your husband is ill, not you.

It's the same thing.

Husband and wife form the same flesh.

Alas!

So that when you examine me, you're examining him.

Very well. Go lie down.

Madam...

A doctor's duty is to heal.

Mr Chapelle has already been betrayed many times.

Do you want me to worsen his affliction?

I am not at your service!

Look, sir!

Let's go, Mount.

I'll never learn to enjoy this.

Shall we take the path through the woodsy bower?

I like the way you say it, but it's out of the question.

That path leads to the cabaret and I want you sober

when you propose.

But this road goes past the castle of Cambyse.

The sight of it infuriates me.

Well!

The wolf who haunts the wood.

Behave!

- Won't you salute me? - Salute me first.

Marquis de Cambyse, lord of the land.

Benjamin Rathery, doctor of Clamecy.

You're a leech? An impressive title!

As good as yours.

The King can name 20 marquis a day,

but not a single doctor.

Quite the joker, I see.

This is as much sport as a stag, and we won't let him get away.

What gall! We'll teach you to be rude to a nobleman!

You are rude to shepherd-girls.

Help me!

What energy!

Oh, well... To the castle!

Moulot, come confer with your master.

We'll see how you plead

in your defense.

Give back my sword... and you'll see.

After deliberation, the court has reached the verdict

that the gentleman before us must kiss

whatever part of me it pleases me to offer.

Long live the Marquis!

How pathetic.

Very well. I'm happy with you.

You may boast of having kissed a marquis.

Marquis! I vow to avenge this slight!

Cambyse!

I vow to avenge this slight! You hear me?

Uncle Benjamin!

Corvol is in revolt. Aunt Bettine spread the news.

Minxit is raising an army to avenge you.

Let's go.

Attention!

Present arms!

Right... face!

Forward march!

About face... left!

At ease!

Drink your fill. It's Mr Minxit's treat.

Friends.

Friends, you have taken up arms,

not only to win the freedom of my future son-in-law Benjamin,

but also to liberate the country from a rampaging tyrant,

who crushes your wheat and dishonors your wives.

Death to Cambyse!

Long live Benjamin!

Bravo. That was an eloquent speech.

Worthy of Livy!

Thank you, my friends. But please lay down your arms.

- What are you saying, Benjamin? - War is a serious business.

A man who leads his troops

into the slaughter unnecessarily is a murderer.

Benjamin is right. You may see it as justified revenge,

but the court will call it fence-breaking,

breaking and entering, trespassing... And all of that

against a marquis.

Each offense is punishable by the galleys.

Go ahead. Sheathe your sword.

Have no fear, friends. I won't give up.

I won't marry Arabelle without avenging my honor.

You could do it after the wedding.

Poor Arabelle is liable to find herself widowed.

What a lofty conception of honor. Naturally. You're a valiant man.

Soldiers! The war has been postponed.

But I'll make this worth your while, anyway.

I beg you, continue to drink my wine.

Dismiss.

Please dine with us.

I respect your vow.

But take time to smell the orange blossoms.

- You've two patients. - What sort?

One is a farmer.

He brought his wife's urine. She fell from the front step.

Good. And the other?

The Sambert lass, a second time.

I'll show you how a doctor examines urine.

What rocky paths! My bones are sore.

Warm my bed!

Mr Minxit! My poor wife...

Yes, your wife! So what! I'm about to collapse.

Peasant...

From what I see, she must have fallen.

Amazing! How did you guess that!

On the doorstep.

Are you a sorcerer?

Rolled four steps.

I'm sorry, you're wrong there. She rolled down five.

Impossible. Go back and count your front steps.

I assure you.

I see no more than four steps here.

By the way... did you bring all your wife's urine?

I spilled some out. The flask was too full.

That was the fifth step!

The one that was missing.

We'll administer the treatment for a five-step fall.

She'll be on her feet in two days.

Thank you. I told her that you'd know how to cure her quickly.

Don't thank me. My servant will collect the fee.

Next!

Come in.

How is she?

Mother is still very weak.

And you're too poor to buy remedies for her?

My father is idle.

What possessed your mother to fall ill?

We'll pay as soon as my father has work again.

Do I look like a fool?

Go see the cook.

She'll give you a quarter mutton and a basket of wine.

That's what your mother needs.

If she still doesn't regain her strength,

send for me. Go now, child.

Don't thank me.

What do you think?

You're a worthy man.

But I'd never treat a fall that way.

In medicine, you're a mere recruit.

Mr de Pont-Cassé has arrived.

For what reason?

Miss Arabelle invited him to dine.

Really?

Who is he?

A courtier.

Even if I hadn't chosen you, I wouldn't give my daughter to him.

What if Arabelle loves him?

No daughter of mine could fall for a viscount.

Let's see his face.

I've already met him. He's a friend of Cambyse.

Is this beplumed lobster the Vicomte?

Himself.

Arabelle has good taste.

If you say so. Let me introduce you to Arabelle.

Let's postpone the pleasure.

I must bleed another patient before supper.

Sir, I know you want to marry Arabelle.

I expressly forbid it.

- You again, Mr Rathery! - Correct. Me again.

Are you here to see Manette? Well, you shan't.

Really?

I've locked her in her room.

And there she'll stay until you leap into Arabelle's bed.

If you'd deflower a girl for her dowry,

take Mr Minxit's money, not mine.

A dowry? I didn't know Manette had one.

So you are a rich man.

Rich! With all the taxes they burden us with...

No. Manette has only one treasure.

Yes, I know. Her virginity!

A maiden's virginity is no joking matter!

Aren't you with Arabelle?

I had to see you. You were angry. Let's make up.

- Are you meeting her? - I must go dine.

The table is sparkling with crystal and silver,

the servants await...

A lover of liberty is not so easily impressed.

Arabelle is pretty.

I wouldn't mind searching her chemise for a flea.

Come here.

Did you grab her by the waist?

Did you stroke her?

You look like a frozen watch.

Did you kiss her?

I don't care. I don't love you anymore!

Mademoiselle, here's your dinner.

To Fontenoy!

The other day, the King...

Hello!

I'm sorry I'm late.

My patient refused to be bled. I had to knock him out.

And then revive him...

Your seat awaits you,

beside my daughter.

Arabelle, this is Dr Rathery.

You were right.

A storm is brewing.

The King intimated that he might appoint me to a high post.

The governorship of La Rochelle will soon be vacant...

His Majesty's words don't seem to interest you.

Listen, my good man, I'm hungry. Simple priorities.

Is your name Rathery?

I once knew... I mean, I once saw...

- for one does not know such people -

...a Rathery who was a royal groom.

Do you happen to be related to him?

Hector...

- because you were granted that name -

no Rathery has ever been a domestic

in any livery.

Not even a courtier's.

What delicious pâté. I'll bet that the hare that went into it

was not a nobleman.

What do you mean?

A nobleman wouldn't flavor a pâté.

You must not overstep the bounds of wit.

Exactly as I intend.

Mr Rathery, do you know

there are parallels between our professions?

I bet that you've killed more men than I have this year.

You win, sir.

I just lost a patient to a carbuncle.

He's gone too far!

You're right, Vallombreuse.

Mr Minxit, since this swaggerer

is your guest, I consent

to cross swords with him.

How generous of you.

I hope you'll be worthy of this honor.

Certainly! Tomorrow, at dawn, at the field at Croix-de-Fer?

Understood.

At least, there's one subject we can agree upon.

The savor of this pâté.

Why let yourself be maimed by this Pont-Cassé?

He picked the fight.

I've no desire to be maimed. I'm attached to my symmetry.

- He's a fearsome opponent. - Never fear.

I've already composed my epitaph: "Here lies Benjamin Rathery,

"who withstood 99 years of vintage Burgundy."

Note that I'm just 35.

If you are slain, it'll end, for you. But for us...

It won't be the end.

Don't heed them. Let me teach you a lunge.

That would disarm a whole regiment.

I'll rid you of that dowry-snatcher.

No one will notice he lived until after he dies.

Don't do it.

You must not kill my father's best friend.

Your scruples are so charming.

To avoid disobeying you, I'll simply damage him.

But, Hector... what if you perish?

I'm as certain of my sword as you are of your needle.

Here. Show me where you want me to strike him.

Your wish is my command.

They say it makes a man forget about marriage.

Mademoiselle, I must speak to you in private.

I'll be quick.

Simply inform me, innocent soul,

if you love Mr de Pont-Cassé.

What can I tell you?

A woman may not always be happy with the man she loves,

but with the one she doesn't love...

I know where my duty lies.

Just one word.

If it's just one word,

I'm willing to take a second to hear it.

Charitable souls want to prevent our duel.

Let's not meet at La Croix-de-Fer,

but at La Pierre-Percée.

- No one will bother us there. - Very well. I know the field.

It's a perfect place for you to leave this world for another.

Are you really going to fight?

It looks that way. The sergeant is about to give me a lesson.

I'll go with you.

Please, Uncle Benjamin!

My word... Well, it may be useful to you when you grow up.

The eyes...

Keep your eyes glued to me.

Your turn.

Thrust like you mean it.

Make a full lunge.

Don't let me catch my breath.

Strive harder!

Strike high and low.

Again.

I'll take the offensive.

Disconcert your enemy by not parrying all thrusts.

Parry only the foils. Dodge the lunges.

If you only parry lunges, throw the enemy off balance.

Dodge!

- Did I do well? - Very well.

Fine. Now, on to the lunge.

Advance: a double engagement. Pause: hold the iron.

A second time to throw him off,

then trip him up.

If your adversary parries the blow, you redouble it. Or he may attack.

And you go for it.

Do come in.

Have a seat.

A drop of wine?

Yes, please. Do you have a sausage?

If I lose,

I don't want to die on an empty stomach.

That lunge of mine will do the trick.

So you see...

I'll end my days in this damned hovel.

All I possess... A dog and some memories.

I have a fine collection of those.

The drum beating the charge... The marches...

so long they bloody your feet,

friends dying in your arms.

That's war.

Oh, but...

I'm not complaining.

Corvol isn't very big.

I wanted to see the world, and I did!

Everywhere I went, houses were in flames,

crops were devastated, and women and children were weeping.

As for a wife,

I was like you: unwilling to marry. One wife?

Just one? Always the same one? With her hair in papers every night?

Hell, no! There are too many girls to lay.

I worked with a will.

Short ones, tall ones, fat ones, thin ones,

pretty ones, plain ones,

downright ugly ones.

Ah. misery!

A long journey to nowhere.

No warm body between my sheets

and I have to cook my own soup.

Think, Benjamin.

At some point, you have to stop.

You too, boy.

Incredible!

Incredible!

Bearers of blades

Who molder in graves

As sure as Saint Peter yawning at the pearly gates

because the customers are always late

Be my witness as I dictate what I want on my tombstone

Listen carefully as I say it to thee

"He died without anger."

Benjamin Rathery.

Gentlemen.

We have been waiting twenty minutes.

What are twenty minutes compared to the eternity awaiting one of us?

Sir, I await your orders.

Holy God, holy God!

What a hell of a fight!

Sir, it is now my privilege to slay you.

Slay me, sir.

That's the reason you're here.

I'd rather die than see you marry Arabelle.

Do you love her truly?

I know that she loves you. Be happy together.

There is no shame in surrendering to you.

You are not a nobleman, but you certainly deserve to be.

If my friendship is worth anything to you,

I offer it.

I request yours in exchange.

Now I can admit it to you.

I've no inclination to marry.

I thought I felt the same way.

I spent years fleeing the institution,

but love caught up with me, and now I have no choice.

Bloody hell! Well said!

Are you Mr de Pont-Cassé? Where is Benjamin?

He went to lunch.

- Weren't you to slay him? - I was. But I did not succeed.

And now Mr Rathery and I are friends.

You are extremely interested in Benjamin's fate.

I love him, but my father is opposed.

He locked me up at the inn, but I managed to escape.

If I understand correctly, your father is an innkeeper?

Why, yes.

He refuses Benjamin's troth?

Benjamin's poor. And wanton, my father says.

I hope your father will reconsider.

Benjamin is a man of uncommon valor.

I know.

Don't fret, Miss. He's in perfect health.

Goodbye, gentlemen.

- A lovely bosom! - Oh! Quite lovely!

Don't you find it odd that an innkeeper

would reject the troth of a man I was willing to duel?

A terrible affront.

Shall we go refresh ourselves at this man's inn?

There's many a way to toast Benjamin.

My brother!

I was so frightened!

Innkeeper! We're thirsty!

Excuse me, I was in the cellar. I didn't hear you.

What can I serve you?

Stupid question! Your best wine.

Of course, of course. Red or white?

White, dullard! Do we look like we drink red wine this early?

Of course not, your excellency.

I'm nearly sorry I took the life

of poor Benjamin.

He was as hearty a drinker as I.

- Did you kill Benjamin? - Less than an hour ago.

Then this is on the house. You've done us all a favor.

He was a dowry-snatcher, a ravisher of virgins.

- Your judgment matters little. - I'll tell you what I think...

- Is this rot your best wine? - I assure you it is, sir...

Keep it for yourself. Take us to your reserve.

What's wrong with you? This little Montrachet...

I hear you lock up your daughter.

I did. But now that Benjamin is dead, I'll let her out.

He'd have had her maidenhead as fast as I pop a cork.

Disgraceful.

Abject! But the Montrachet is excellent.

Get in.

Impossible. You must be joking.

Not at all. I'm as sober as the Pope. Now, get in.

- Oh, no... - Get in, I say! Do you hear?

Milord, please.

Get in!

The lid.

The hymen of a man's only daughter, milord.

Like popping a cork!

Now come in!

At this point, Diogenes,

your only hope is to pray for Benjamin's soul.

When it's in Heaven, we'll free you.

It won't be any time soon.

Shut up and pray.

Go ask Mr Minxit

for a cart and two brawny servants.

As you like, my liege.

In the meantime...

I'll explore the cellar.

Your bill.

140 pounds ten shillings and sixpence you've owed me for three years.

You'll hear from me.

Tell me that you're ill, I'll be delighted.

I bear a duly stamped seizure warrant.

You'll go to prison.

- Aren't you dead? - You are sharp!

- And Pont-Cassé? - Sturdy as a bridge.

I'm not a brutal man, but you could have hurt him.

I'd have been ashamed until my dying day.

Mr Minxit, do you trust me?

More than myself.

In that case, listen: Pont-Cassé is now my friend.

He'd make an excellent son-in-law.

You're joking.

It is my serious opinion.

The Vicomte is a fine fellow: full of good cheer,

whimsy, and wit. He's just like us.

If that is true, I'm a very bad father.

There, there.

He is eager to propose.

It's cruel to make him wait.

Pont-Cassé! Come now, man!

Sir... My kind sir... please permit me...

- I can't say it. - I know what it is.

Don't trouble yourself.

I give you my daughter's hand.

Mr Minxit, if life contains one minute

when a man can consider himself happy,

it's when he's accepted as a son-in-law.

I see you were so sure of my consent, you celebrated.

That's right, but I have other reasons to rejoice.

Guess what this is?

A barrel. A great, huge barrel.

And what's inside...?

Inside?

Something to delight Benjamin.

Benjamin, Mr Bonteint went to see the bailiff.

And now you must arrest me.

I can't always let you flee.

I'll follow you.

I've been worn out lately. Prison will be a chance to rest.

I won't be lonely, Ronsard is coming.

Ah! Ronsard!

"Your face was still full of wonder,

"Like your voice. Your lips were lovely..."

Our prison is hospitable, but why are you in such a hurry?

In prison, no one marries.

To die for death's sake

I may die of drunkenness

With one's heart leaning on a heap of old friends

To die for death's sake I want to die of tenderness

For to die of love's sake is only half a death

I want to die of my life

Before it grows old and gray

With one hand on a bottle and the other on a Wench.

Benjamin, you're free.

So soon? I've only been here for an hour.

I paid your debts.

I would have asked the King to pardon you.

You settled all my debts?

Don't thank me. I did it for myself.

Now that my daughter is betrothed,

what would I do without you, friend?

Let's go. I don't like this place.

As you see, I've no choice. Do not be sad,

my friends. We'll surely meet again.

As far as we're concerned,

money is immaterial.

- Who is that? - The Marquise de Cambyse.

That tender marvel in the old goat's bed?

Perish the thought.

The marquise was sold to Cambyse by her father.

Awesome cleavage. I can't wait for tonight's ball.

NW SON.!

Right. I'm betrothed!

A celebration is planned at the castle tonight?

The Vicomte de Pont-Cassé, the Chevalier de Vallombreuse,

and Father de Vlamink.

- Where were you? - Caught in the storm.

We took shelter until it passed.

Please excuse us for being tardy.

I'd excuse you anything.

I may even be so bold as to bless this delay.

The storm brought me together with this holy man

who sought shelter in the same shed.

The reverend happens to be the confessor

and personal physician of Marshal de Saxe,

whom he met in the Flanders campaign.

Yes, yes. A great general.

And a great sinner as well.

Father de Vlamink is going to Chambord,

where Marshal de Saxe is now headquartered.

I offered him a night's hospitality.

Excellent initiative.

A chair for our Father. Quick!

All these worldly pleasures...

Exquisite, but fleeting.

I hope Heaven hasn't slipped your mind?

Of course not. The salvation of my soul is a top priority.

At Christmas, Easter, and Ascension,

I always make a large donation to our Church.

Don't you make an offering on Trinity Sunday, my son?

No. But I shall, from now on.

So you're the Marshal's confessor?

May I?

Quite frankly, your excellency,

are you prepared to hear harsh news?

I've made a study of zoology.

On that basis, I must say that your health worries me.

Your blotchy complexion,

your eye

shot with blood,

your vermilion nose,

the sour odor

of your perspiration,

not to mention your breath...

Tell me, child...

Are you fulfilling your conjugal duties?

Assiduously.

I'm afraid you must dampen your ardor.

From now on, you will favor your wife

only every other day.

And only after having supped upon

a lean soup and a few vegetables.

Your pulse indicates a weak heart.

The company in bed of such a lovely woman

could be fatal to you.

And on evenings when I forbid myself...

my conjugal duties,

may I eat whatever I like?

Of course.

In fact, tonight,

you may as well continue to stuff your belly.

- Is that you, Father? - And you, son?

Can't you sleep?

Revenge comes first. And yourself?

I must pay my respects to the Marquise's friend.

Congratulations, although my robe should incite me to chastise you.

I'm burying my bachelorhood. Can you forgive me?

I give you my blessing, son.

- Who's there? - The holy man you took in.

What is it?

I'm sorry, madam. The marquis is very ill.

- And he's only going to worsen. - Why is that?

I'll explain.

Don't be afraid. I've nothing against you.

I'm Benjamin Rathery.

The man Mr de Cambyse once humiliated in public.

Yes! I recognize you now.

I gave careful thought to how I'd get revenge.

When I saw you, I knew.

You are beautiful.

I'll cuckold Cambyse.

- Sir! - It's essential to me.

No one will know.

It will comfort me to know

that I set a pair of horns

on Cambyse's head.

If you hesitate, I'll go straight to your husband's chambers.

Remember, he is fat

and clumsy.

He won't withstand my attack.

Sir, I know where my wifely duty lies.

Madame la Marquise!

Madame la Marquise!

The Marquis is very ill.

Quickly, Madame.

Madame la Marquise, please!

Father! Praise the Lord!

What is going on?

The Marquis is choking. He was devouring a salmon.

A bone is stuck in his throat.

The poor man followed my advice too carefully.

If my knowledge can be of any use to him...

I'm sure it can.

Ah, my sweetheart!

Monsieur le marquis,

it is a large bone, which probably carries disease.

The larynx is swelling before our eyes.

I do not despair

of having the surgery succeed, but...

my knowledge is paltry without the Lord's blessing...

Please rouse your guests

and your servants, so that they can pray.

Moulot! Moulot! The bell!

It's the Marquis!

Everyone, go upstairs!

Now I can operate.

But one little formality still remains.

What is that?

Marquis, do you recall

a man you once humiliated publicly

because you said he'd refused to salute you?

Oh, yes. The one I forced to kiss my...

Well?

Well that man, Benjamin Rathery...

is me!

I once kissed you, Marquis.

Now it's your turn to kiss me.

I thought forgiveness was sweeter than revenge.

Oh, madam. If I'd kissed you where I kissed him,

it would have given me eminent satisfaction.

I beg you, dear, please accept.

Please don't make a widow of me at such an early age.

All right. Leave, all of you.

No, sir! The insult was a public one.

The amends must be public too.

And that's not all.

There is someone here I find completely inimical.

His presence may trouble me.

Leave, Moulot.

Correct. But I want him to go out the window.

You heard me...

Out the window. Throw him out now!

Obey the doctor.

No, no! Not the window!

Not out the window!

Vicomte, sir!

Would you kindly assist me?

I'd be delighted, Father... Doctor Rathery.

Delighted to be of service. Madam.

Friends, this is the sword that avenged Benjamin.

Innkeeper, you've been soaking for 24 hours.

Since you had little to occupy you,

I hope you prayed for the soul

of poor Benjamin...

Are you mute?

Is that milord

addressing me?

Himself. Will you answer?

Did you pray?

That's all I did. But let me out,

I beg you!

Will you let your daughter marry whom she pleases?

Whom she pleases. As long as you free me.

Not yet. Swear to give her a fine dowry,

on her wedding day.

We know you're a rich man. Give her 10,000 ecus.

I promise.

You should be ashamed! Give her 20,000!

So be it! 20,000. But not a penny more.

It's a bargain!

It's a bargain.

Gentlemen.

We want to make you happy in spite of yourself.

Benjamin. I love you as if you were my own son, you know.

You must marry Manette.

You'll grow old before you know it flying from flower to flower.

Mr Minxit is damned right, Benjamin.

Look where flitting about got me...

I'm going blind.

Soon, I'll be unable to examine urine,

be it as clear as spring water.

You'll take my place, as I've always hoped.

Your place is here.

Jean-Pierre...

Three men-at-arms wish to see Mr Rathery.

Benjamin Rathery.

Here I am. May I help you, gentlemen?

"In the King's name,

"the Marquis of Cambyse, lord of Corvol

"and Clamecy, hereby accuses you of trespassing,

"fence-breaking, and assault

"of his superintendent.

"His Majesty's prosecutor places you under arrest."

Take him away.

Good bye.

None of that!

- Have some respect. - What do you want?

As the Vicomte de Pont-Cassé I order you...

Sorry, but the only orders I must obey are the prosecutor's.

This is a pretty pickle. Cambyse is influential.

He may get the galleys.

Can nothing be done?

His Majesty sometimes grants me an ear.

"How I wish I could, yellowing splendidly,

"In a shower of gold, fall drop by drop

"Into the lap of fair Cassandra

"When sleep is sliding into her eyes

"Then I wish I were a dazzling white bull

"Galloping away with her on my back

"When she treads upon the tender April grass..."

"if I am forced to say why I loved him,

"The only way for me to say the truth

"is to reply:

"Because he was himself. Because I was myself."

Father!

Arabelle, my girl, go fetch me Benjamin.

But he's in prison.

The prosecutor is an old friend. He'll release him.

Quick! Go fetch him!

Monsieur de Pont-Cassé, His Majesty awaits you.

How much time do I have left?

You need some rest, Mr Minxit.

A few days in bed, sipping Pommard wine,

and you'll be up and about and cheeky.

The evening air is chilly.

It is time to say farewell to this house and garden,

and these old trees.

I've said nothing, but...

for months, my heart's been weary.

Do you see why I was so anxious to make you happy?

Come now, Benjamin... How much longer will I live?

Answer me honestly.

The traveler must know his departure time...

in order to pack his bags.

Mr Minxit, today is Thursday.

By Saturday, one Corvol home will be in mourning.

Excellent diagnosis.

But... does Friday belong to me?

Entirely.

In that case,

invite all my friends

to a final feast.

I don't want to go on bad terms with life.

With a cup in hand

I plan to bid life farewell.

Sit down, my friends, I insist.

I want my last sight to be your jolly faces

and full cups.

If you want to please me,

let your hearts be as merry as ever they were.

To your health, friends.

To yours, Benjamin.

Holy Jesus, this is good stuff!

Good stuff.

I don't want my death to be wept.

Instead of mourning, pin a rose in your buttonhole.

Dip it into a glass of champagne,

and scatter petals on my grave.

Dig my grave in the meadow, beside the brook.

Plant it with

a bower of grapes

and honeysuckle.

You shall say my funeral oration.

I'd be happy to hear while I'm still alive

what posterity will think of me.

"The man we are leaving in this leafy bower

"leaves behind unanimous regret."

No man ever left behind unanimous regret.

Do you prefer: "Friends who will long mourn him"?

No. That's no more exact.

So...

"He lived as a philosopher,

"enjoying life

"and sharing its joys with his loved ones.

"He died the same way,

"after a splendid feast,

"surrounded by friends.

"Passer-by, throw a flower on his grave."

- Benjamin, I saw the King. - Hector!

His Majesty granted my request, and consented to your release.

Long live the King!

However, the King believes that a public offense

to de Cambyse cannot go unpunished.

The galley sentence

is commuted to banishment.

You must go into exile.

Let's go.

Ready.

You're free.

I'll take you along, too.

- How can I tell you... - Don't thank me.

You once spared my life.

Mr Minxit wanted you to have Arabelle.

I am twice indebted to you.

Where will you go?

Straight ahead.

- That may take you far. - I hope it will.

Farewell, my friend.

Farewell.

- Gaspard, see this stream? - Yes.

I bet it's teeming with crayfish. Catch us some.

Manette will rest.

I'm going.

Say, Manette,

that treasure of yours your father spoke of...

Yes...

Let's enjoy it now, shall we, while we wait for the crayfish.

Subtitles: Eclair Group