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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:23,390 --> 00:00:24,368 But furry. 2 00:00:24,457 --> 00:00:25,959 I think it's a message... 3 00:00:26,059 --> 00:00:27,561 from someone or something... 4 00:00:27,660 --> 00:00:30,300 trying to warn us about someone or something 5 00:00:30,397 --> 00:00:31,899 [Gene] it's a booger. 6 00:00:31,998 --> 00:00:33,500 Kids, off the seats. 7 00:00:33,600 --> 00:00:35,375 - Oh, sorry, sir. That was my butt. - Hmm! 8 00:00:35,468 --> 00:00:37,641 - What are you looking at'? - Smart money's on boogers 9 00:00:37,737 --> 00:00:39,045 it's not a booger. 10 00:00:39,139 --> 00:00:41,016 Let the man think for himself! 11 00:00:41,107 --> 00:00:43,144 - I don't think it's a booger. - Who asked you? 12 00:00:43,243 --> 00:00:44,551 It's getting bigger- 13 00:00:44,644 --> 00:00:46,214 It knows What we�re thinking. 14 00:00:46,312 --> 00:00:47,814 [Bob] Huh. It is definitely growing. 15 00:00:47,914 --> 00:00:49,757 I just hope it's not that green mold. 16 00:00:49,849 --> 00:00:51,556 It's called green mold. 17 00:00:51,651 --> 00:00:53,562 You see it in a lot of beach towns... 18 00:00:53,653 --> 00:00:55,997 and filthy, disgusting, poorly managed restaurants. 19 00:00:56,089 --> 00:00:56,726 Hey! 20 00:00:56,823 --> 00:00:59,133 They had to send you, Hugo? No one else does this? 21 00:00:59,225 --> 00:01:02,763 I just got mold-certified. In a month, I'll be cleared for vermin too. 22 00:01:02,862 --> 00:01:04,398 Oh, congratulations. 23 00:01:04,497 --> 00:01:07,273 Okay, Gene. If you eat this mold, I'll give you five- 24 00:01:07,367 --> 00:01:08,846 -[Munching] - Whoa. 25 00:01:08,935 --> 00:01:10,243 Mmm! Gorgonzola. 26 00:01:10,336 --> 00:01:12,577 So What do I gotta do? Use bleach on it or something? 27 00:01:12,672 --> 00:01:15,585 [Laughs] Use bleach on it? �Oh, I'll just put bleach on it.� 28 00:01:15,675 --> 00:01:17,154 No, of course not, Bob. 29 00:01:17,243 --> 00:01:20,019 - I hate you. - This is big. You have to close. 30 00:01:20,113 --> 00:01:22,423 The whole building will have to be tented for 48 hours. 31 00:01:22,515 --> 00:01:24,722 Great. There goes our weekend revenue. 32 00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:27,697 Ooh, two days off. Bobby, we could use it. 33 00:01:27,787 --> 00:01:30,199 I guess it has been a While since we've had a break. 34 00:01:30,290 --> 00:01:31,792 Yeah. Ten years. 35 00:01:31,891 --> 00:01:33,632 What? That's- Can't be right. 36 00:01:33,726 --> 00:01:35,933 Ten years! 37 00:01:36,029 --> 00:01:38,373 You're really living the dream, Linda. 38 00:01:38,465 --> 00:01:40,945 - Aren't you done, Hugo? - Sure, Bob. I'm done. 39 00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:43,776 [Shouting] Mold! Dangerous killer mold! 40 00:01:43,870 --> 00:01:45,440 Floating death spores! Everyone move! 41 00:01:45,538 --> 00:01:49,042 - Gene, how are you feeling? - Kind of nauseous, a little light-headed. 42 00:01:49,142 --> 00:01:51,088 Pretty good. Glad I ate it. 43 00:01:51,177 --> 00:01:53,521 - You say that about everything. - Yeah. 44 00:01:53,613 --> 00:01:55,251 - Green mold, huh? - Yeah. 45 00:01:55,348 --> 00:01:57,259 - You ever dealt with this stuff, Mort? - Oh, sure. 46 00:01:57,350 --> 00:01:59,626 We get all kinds of moldy bodies at the home. 47 00:01:59,719 --> 00:02:01,824 Not on the bodies. I mean on the walls or- 48 00:02:01,921 --> 00:02:03,628 - And you should see the shut-ins. - Stop. 49 00:02:03,723 --> 00:02:07,068 - One guy's back looked like a putting green. - Oh, dear Lord. 50 00:02:07,160 --> 00:02:10,141 Hey, you got to get out of the apartment While the mold guys work, right? 51 00:02:10,230 --> 00:02:11,903 Yeah. We're gonna go to a motel. 52 00:02:11,998 --> 00:02:15,411 - And we�re going to tear into that minibar! - We're gonna go on a bender. 53 00:02:15,502 --> 00:02:17,140 - No, we�re not. - Yes, we are. 54 00:02:17,237 --> 00:02:19,979 I'm gonna drink some Baileys and unwind. 55 00:02:20,073 --> 00:02:21,950 Hey, guys. Stay with me. 56 00:02:22,041 --> 00:02:24,521 No, I mean, I appreciate the offer, but I- 57 00:02:24,611 --> 00:02:27,990 Listen to me. I live alone... in an enormous apartment... 58 00:02:28,081 --> 00:02:30,561 - that happens to be above a funeral home. - Hmm. 59 00:02:30,650 --> 00:02:32,687 - So come on. Stay with me. - Aw. 60 00:02:32,785 --> 00:02:34,093 - Thanks, Mort. - Yeah, yeah! 61 00:02:34,187 --> 00:02:35,962 Linda, seriously, you want to stay in a funeral home? 62 00:02:36,055 --> 00:02:38,865 - Yes, yes, yes! - Why not? it'll be fun. ls it spooky? 63 00:02:38,958 --> 00:02:42,371 You mean, do I have a medicine cabinet full of corpse moisturizers? 64 00:02:42,462 --> 00:02:43,770 Ooh! 65 00:02:43,863 --> 00:02:47,208 Yes. Do they make my skin soft as a baby? You decide. 66 00:02:47,300 --> 00:02:49,576 [Gasps] it's not greasy either. 67 00:02:49,669 --> 00:02:52,445 - Tina, touch. -[Groans] 68 00:02:52,539 --> 00:02:54,143 Come on! Go get your toothbrushes. 69 00:02:54,240 --> 00:02:55,947 Yeah, yeah! Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes! 70 00:02:59,412 --> 00:03:00,720 [All] ? Weekend at Mort�s ? 71 00:03:00,813 --> 00:03:02,554 ? We're gonna have a weekend at Mort's ? 72 00:03:02,649 --> 00:03:03,889 [Linda] Uh, uh, uh! 73 00:03:03,983 --> 00:03:05,291 - ? Weekend at Mort�s ? -[Doorbell Rings] 74 00:03:05,385 --> 00:03:07,592 ? We're gonna have a weekend at Mort's J ? 75 00:03:07,687 --> 00:03:09,462 Follow me to your rooms. 76 00:03:10,256 --> 00:03:12,167 Urn. Another urn. 77 00:03:12,258 --> 00:03:15,068 That's an award I won for best urn. 78 00:03:15,161 --> 00:03:18,074 Okay, kids. Don't climb on anything. Don't touch anything. 79 00:03:18,164 --> 00:03:20,440 If you do touch something, don�t touch me afterwards... 80 00:03:20,533 --> 00:03:21,807 and don't play with dead bodies. 81 00:03:21,901 --> 00:03:23,574 Do you think he's gonna have skulls? 82 00:03:23,670 --> 00:03:25,843 What do you think he eats soup out of? 83 00:03:25,939 --> 00:03:29,614 Do you think he's gonna have a drawer full of gum that he takes out of corpse pockets? 84 00:03:29,709 --> 00:03:31,347 'Cause if he does, I want some. 85 00:03:31,444 --> 00:03:32,752 - Shh! - Here we go. 86 00:03:34,547 --> 00:03:36,322 -[Door Creaks] -[All Gasp] 87 00:03:38,351 --> 00:03:40,854 [Linda] Hey, I'm not horrified at all. Aw. 88 00:03:40,954 --> 00:03:42,592 [Bob] Wow, I didn't know you were rich. 89 00:03:42,689 --> 00:03:45,169 - Kids, off the furniture. - Well, I get a lot of stuff cheap. 90 00:03:45,258 --> 00:03:47,238 Everything in here had someone die on it. 91 00:03:47,327 --> 00:03:48,670 Kids, off the furniture! 92 00:03:48,761 --> 00:03:51,241 - Your room's right down the hall. - All right, kids. Let's go. 93 00:03:51,331 --> 00:03:53,902 No, leave the kids. This Weekend, I'm Uncle Mort. 94 00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:56,310 You seriously want to watch my kids? 95 00:03:56,402 --> 00:03:58,382 -[Clicking] - ??[Fragments] 96 00:03:58,471 --> 00:03:59,779 [Mort] Uhh. 97 00:03:59,872 --> 00:04:02,409 [Nervous Chuckle] Yes! The whole Weekend. 98 00:04:02,508 --> 00:04:04,419 This should be a vacation for you two. 99 00:04:04,510 --> 00:04:07,047 Oh, we can make it the honeymoon we never had. 100 00:04:07,146 --> 00:04:10,923 Sure. You know, I got the bed you're sleeping in because a man died in it... 101 00:04:11,017 --> 00:04:13,588 making love, huh? 102 00:04:13,686 --> 00:04:15,324 - Good God. - Mm-hmm. 103 00:04:15,421 --> 00:04:17,059 It's a haunted honeymoon. 104 00:04:17,156 --> 00:04:18,635 [Ghostly Moaning] 105 00:04:18,725 --> 00:04:24,539 [Kids Moaning And Groaning] 106 00:04:26,766 --> 00:04:28,040 Ah! [Grunts] 107 00:04:32,405 --> 00:04:34,612 [Linda] Two whole days off from the restaurant. Oh! 108 00:04:34,707 --> 00:04:37,313 - I know. - What are we gonna do with ourselves? 109 00:04:37,410 --> 00:04:39,788 I know What I'm gonna do. First, I'm gonna take these off. 110 00:04:39,879 --> 00:04:41,859 - Oh! - These bad boys. 111 00:04:41,948 --> 00:04:43,018 - Bobby. - Hmm? 112 00:04:43,116 --> 00:04:45,426 You gonna slip into something more comfortable? 113 00:04:45,518 --> 00:04:47,156 And I'm gonna get these on. 114 00:04:47,253 --> 00:04:49,255 [Gasps] Oh, are those your, uh- 115 00:04:49,355 --> 00:04:51,426 My lazy pants? Yes. 116 00:04:51,524 --> 00:04:54,130 Well, I guess they come off easy. 117 00:04:54,227 --> 00:04:56,730 And, uh, now I will get this guy out. 118 00:04:56,829 --> 00:04:58,934 Ah, uh-huh, uh-huh. 119 00:04:59,032 --> 00:05:01,171 And let the vacation begin. 120 00:05:01,267 --> 00:05:02,541 What the hell is that? 121 00:05:02,635 --> 00:05:04,740 - It's my model. - Since when do you do models? 122 00:05:04,837 --> 00:05:07,750 It's a hobby of mine, Lin. From back when I could still have hobbies. 123 00:05:07,840 --> 00:05:12,220 I just relax, turn my brain off and enjoy the thrill of the build. 124 00:05:12,312 --> 00:05:14,349 - The bus from Speed? - Yeah, the bus from Speed 125 00:05:14,447 --> 00:05:15,721 [Chorus] ? Bus from Speed ? 126 00:05:15,815 --> 00:05:17,692 I didn't know you liked that movie so much. 127 00:05:17,784 --> 00:05:20,822 I never saw it. I don't like to see the movie until I finish the model. 128 00:05:20,920 --> 00:05:22,160 - Hmm. - Makes it more fun. 129 00:05:22,255 --> 00:05:24,929 Wouldn't it be more fun if we did something together? 130 00:05:25,024 --> 00:05:27,664 Like, uh, like couples manicures? 131 00:05:27,760 --> 00:05:29,433 Or couples waxing? 132 00:05:29,529 --> 00:05:31,873 [Gasps] You could get a manzillian. 133 00:05:31,964 --> 00:05:34,240 That stuff is for people who are dating, Linda. 134 00:05:34,334 --> 00:05:38,373 We-We do other couples stuff. We couples live together. And that's even better. 135 00:05:38,471 --> 00:05:40,508 - You know what? I'm gonna go. - Okay, good. 136 00:05:40,606 --> 00:05:41,812 - I mean, okay. - Yeah. 137 00:05:41,908 --> 00:05:45,515 Gonna be all by myself. On my honeymoon, I might add. 138 00:05:45,611 --> 00:05:47,887 It's not our honeymoon, Linda. 139 00:05:47,980 --> 00:05:50,586 Hey, look! Comes with a little Keanu. 140 00:05:50,683 --> 00:05:53,425 Hi, guy.[High-pitched] �Hi, Bob. Missed you, buddy.� 141 00:05:53,519 --> 00:05:56,193 Oh, for Pete's sakes, you big freak! 142 00:05:56,289 --> 00:06:00,328 Bet you never knew washing out rubber tubing could be such a blast, huh, kids? 143 00:06:00,426 --> 00:06:01,803 Well, I had a feeling. 144 00:06:01,894 --> 00:06:05,273 Who wants to help me glue a toupee on an old man's cadaver? 145 00:06:05,365 --> 00:06:07,345 Yay! This is like camp. 146 00:06:07,433 --> 00:06:08,741 [Groaning] 147 00:06:08,835 --> 00:06:12,510 Tina, what's bothering you? The wig or the cadaver? 148 00:06:12,605 --> 00:06:14,915 - The cadaver. - Wigs can be scary. 149 00:06:15,007 --> 00:06:17,510 You know what? Why don't you kids go ahead and take five? 150 00:06:17,610 --> 00:06:20,113 Explore the morgue. But stay away from my computer. 151 00:06:20,213 --> 00:06:22,989 - Not because of porn. - This computer? 152 00:06:23,082 --> 00:06:24,720 - Come on, now. - What's this? 153 00:06:24,817 --> 00:06:27,058 �A dating Web site for morticians." 154 00:06:27,153 --> 00:06:29,064 Mort, you got a message! 155 00:06:29,155 --> 00:06:31,795 Yeah. Well, this lady and I have been messaging. 156 00:06:31,891 --> 00:06:34,565 I sent her a wink. She sent me back a kissy face. 157 00:06:34,660 --> 00:06:36,606 Kissy face? That's a big deal. 158 00:06:36,696 --> 00:06:39,802 You need to take this relationship into the real world, Mort. 159 00:06:39,899 --> 00:06:41,776 Yeah! Reality, Mort. 160 00:06:41,868 --> 00:06:43,609 MeetSpace! Get into it. 161 00:06:43,703 --> 00:06:45,239 Nah, I'm not ready. 162 00:06:45,338 --> 00:06:47,944 Ah, you're right, Mort. You're wh-what, 50? 163 00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:49,280 Wait till you're ready. 164 00:06:49,375 --> 00:06:52,185 Fifty? I'm 35 years old. 165 00:06:52,278 --> 00:06:54,383 - Huh? - If you believe my dating profile. 166 00:06:54,480 --> 00:06:55,959 [All Laughing] 167 00:06:56,048 --> 00:06:57,493 - Yeah. And... send. -[Beeps] 168 00:06:57,583 --> 00:06:58,687 What? What'd you do? 169 00:06:58,785 --> 00:07:02,790 Wash your hairpiece, Mort. You're going on a date! 170 00:07:05,391 --> 00:07:06,631 Oh, Keanu. 171 00:07:06,726 --> 00:07:08,433 [High-pitched] �Give me long sleeves." 172 00:07:08,528 --> 00:07:10,007 Why? You look great in a 173 00:07:10,096 --> 00:07:11,769 �I don't know. Just switch it up.� 174 00:07:11,864 --> 00:07:12,934 Okay. 175 00:07:13,032 --> 00:07:15,535 �No, no. Make me one of those tuxedo T-shirts. 176 00:07:15,635 --> 00:07:17,012 Do that. That'll be funny.� 177 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:18,605 That's stupid. I don't like those. 178 00:07:18,704 --> 00:07:21,981 Ah, I see you're still playing with your dolls. 179 00:07:22,074 --> 00:07:23,052 Mm-hmm. 180 00:07:23,142 --> 00:07:25,144 I just got back from salsa boot camp. 181 00:07:25,244 --> 00:07:27,724 I was the lonely little salsa-ita. All by myself. 182 00:07:27,814 --> 00:07:28,952 �She's back." 183 00:07:29,048 --> 00:07:30,186 Hey, just be cool. 184 00:07:30,283 --> 00:07:32,786 [Louise] Mom, Dad, come quick! Oh, my God! 185 00:07:32,885 --> 00:07:34,364 What? What is it? What's wrong? 186 00:07:34,454 --> 00:07:36,900 Oh, nothing. This is just silly 187 00:07:36,989 --> 00:07:38,969 Mort asked a girl on a date. 188 00:07:39,058 --> 00:07:40,366 A date? 189 00:07:40,460 --> 00:07:41,871 It was the kids' idea. 190 00:07:41,961 --> 00:07:45,636 Yep. I proposed a romantic rendezvous for 8:00 p.m. tonight... 191 00:07:45,731 --> 00:07:48,143 at the elegant Jimmy Pesto�s. 192 00:07:48,234 --> 00:07:49,713 What? Jimmy Pesto�s? 193 00:07:49,802 --> 00:07:52,043 What? I only know two restaurants. 194 00:07:52,138 --> 00:07:54,084 And they have cloth napkins. 195 00:07:54,173 --> 00:07:55,811 - Don't rub it in. - Calm down. 196 00:07:55,908 --> 00:07:57,046 Hey, she replied! 197 00:07:57,143 --> 00:07:58,554 Already? Too soon. Am I right? 198 00:07:58,644 --> 00:07:59,816 It's not a good sign. 199 00:07:59,912 --> 00:08:02,449 �Mort, it's a date. See you at eight.� 200 00:08:02,548 --> 00:08:03,720 She's a rhymer. 201 00:08:03,816 --> 00:08:06,660 Go, Mort. I mean, it could be fun, two morticians. 202 00:08:06,752 --> 00:08:08,754 Hey, What if you and Linda come too? 203 00:08:08,855 --> 00:08:11,495 - No, no. - Yeah! A double date! 204 00:08:11,591 --> 00:08:14,504 - Oh, but who would watch the kids? - Right. Yeah. 205 00:08:14,594 --> 00:08:16,733 - Tina can babysit. - I can? 206 00:08:16,829 --> 00:08:20,333 Oh, come on. We're a little old to be babysat. 207 00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:23,414 - Isn't that an outdated concept? - No. 208 00:08:23,503 --> 00:08:28,384 Need I remind you What happened last time she was �in charge�? 209 00:08:29,141 --> 00:08:30,279 Free swim! 210 00:08:30,376 --> 00:08:31,980 Special delivery! 211 00:08:32,712 --> 00:08:34,282 Hobo dinner! 212 00:08:34,380 --> 00:08:36,917 Oh, pshh. We'll just be right across the street. 213 00:08:37,016 --> 00:08:39,758 Tina can call us on the emergency cell phone if she needs to. 214 00:08:39,852 --> 00:08:43,857 All right. You bought the ticket. You take the ride. 215 00:08:43,956 --> 00:08:47,199 Come on, Linda. We shouldn't go to this. It will be bad. 216 00:08:47,293 --> 00:08:49,899 Bob, we are going out tonight. 217 00:08:49,996 --> 00:08:52,374 - All right, fine, fine. - Yay! 218 00:08:52,465 --> 00:08:56,174 - But just for a couple hours. And I'm wearing my lazy pants. - Okay. 219 00:08:56,269 --> 00:08:58,647 And I'm gonna drink... a lot. 220 00:08:58,738 --> 00:09:01,218 Yay! Double date! All right! 221 00:09:01,307 --> 00:09:03,878 [Linda Laughing] Oh! I love it. 222 00:09:03,976 --> 00:09:05,887 I feel like we�re in Jamaica. 223 00:09:05,978 --> 00:09:08,322 Ooh! Jamaican honeymoon. 224 00:09:08,414 --> 00:09:12,419 You be just in time for �pastafarian� night with garlic �dreadsticks,� mon. 225 00:09:12,518 --> 00:09:13,496 Stop. 226 00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:15,623 - Groove with me to- - Uh-uh. 227 00:09:15,721 --> 00:09:16,699 - I- - No. 228 00:09:16,789 --> 00:09:18,268 [No Accent] You're such a jerk. 229 00:09:21,527 --> 00:09:25,134 [Thinking] I'm a born babysitter. Tina brings the fun. 230 00:09:25,231 --> 00:09:27,233 Now .. sparkle. 231 00:09:27,333 --> 00:09:31,804 Hi, Gene. Would you like to play a game? Maybe sing a song? 232 00:09:32,939 --> 00:09:34,282 [Grunts] 233 00:09:34,373 --> 00:09:36,910 Uh, Tina, will you join me in the corner for a little powwow? 234 00:09:37,009 --> 00:09:37,987 Okay. 235 00:09:39,078 --> 00:09:41,251 - You're dying out there, kid. - Yeah. 236 00:09:41,347 --> 00:09:44,692 - Everybody hates you. - I know. I'm blowing it. 237 00:09:44,784 --> 00:09:47,390 - Should I call for help on the emergency phone? - Hold on. 238 00:09:47,486 --> 00:09:49,796 - Maybe you should think outside the box. - Okay. 239 00:09:49,889 --> 00:09:55,202 How many times in our life will we get a chance to wander unsupervised in a morgue? 240 00:09:55,294 --> 00:09:57,205 Yeah. Won't that be scary? 241 00:09:57,296 --> 00:10:01,403 Tina, you don't babysit from here. You babysit from here. 242 00:10:01,500 --> 00:10:04,606 - My boob? -[Sighs] Yes, your boob. 243 00:10:04,704 --> 00:10:06,012 - Really? - Yeah. 244 00:10:06,105 --> 00:10:09,314 - What's your boob telling you, Tina? - I don't know. 245 00:10:09,408 --> 00:10:11,945 [High-pitched] Explore the morgue. 246 00:10:12,044 --> 00:10:14,684 - Explore the morgue? - That-a-girl! 247 00:10:17,583 --> 00:10:19,859 [Gene Screams] 248 00:10:20,753 --> 00:10:22,232 Sorry, just hungry. 249 00:10:25,191 --> 00:10:27,637 - ?[Reggae] ? - ? Try da ziti tonight ? 250 00:10:27,727 --> 00:10:30,936 ? Oh, yeah it's on da special tonight ? 251 00:10:31,030 --> 00:10:33,408 Bobby, they're playing our song. 252 00:10:33,499 --> 00:10:36,173 What? Our song isn't �Ziti Tonight.� 253 00:10:36,268 --> 00:10:38,179 [Gasps] Oh, I think that's her! 254 00:10:42,141 --> 00:10:45,816 Mort? I recognize you from the picture on your Web site. 255 00:10:45,911 --> 00:10:49,324 - I'm Samantha. - Well, it's quite a pleasure to meet you, Samantha. 256 00:10:49,415 --> 00:10:51,918 This is my friend Bob and his lovely Wife Linda. 257 00:10:52,018 --> 00:10:54,055 - Hi. - Hi. We're on our honeymoon. 258 00:10:54,153 --> 00:10:56,429 Oh. Congratulations? 259 00:10:56,522 --> 00:10:58,229 - Thank you. - It's not our honeymoon. 260 00:10:58,324 --> 00:10:59,598 Well, technically- 261 00:10:59,692 --> 00:11:00,693 Not technically. 262 00:11:00,793 --> 00:11:02,704 - First time to Jamaica. - Oh, my God. 263 00:11:02,795 --> 00:11:06,607 Sorry for the smell. Long day slaving over the old embalming table. 264 00:11:06,699 --> 00:11:11,307 Well, let me just say that I've been embalming you with my eyes 265 00:11:11,404 --> 00:11:12,883 since the moment you Walked in. 266 00:11:12,972 --> 00:11:15,350 - [Giggles] Mort! - [Chuckles] 267 00:11:15,441 --> 00:11:18,615 - Ugh. - Hush. it's their special language. 268 00:11:18,711 --> 00:11:20,486 Waiter, do you have anything bigger? 269 00:11:20,579 --> 00:11:22,081 Come on, everybody! 270 00:11:22,181 --> 00:11:24,457 ? Try our dessert ? 271 00:11:24,550 --> 00:11:26,826 ? You gotta have a cannoli ? 272 00:11:26,919 --> 00:11:28,557 Ooh, cannolis! 273 00:11:31,357 --> 00:11:34,361 Let's move. Oh, how thoughtless of me. 274 00:11:34,460 --> 00:11:37,998 Tina, I'm sure you want to go first, to protect us and stuff. 275 00:11:38,097 --> 00:11:41,101 Yeah, Tina. Earn that sweet babysitter cash. 276 00:11:41,200 --> 00:11:43,908 Wait, wait. First, how 'bout a hug? 277 00:11:44,003 --> 00:11:46,108 - Hmm? - Aw. 278 00:11:46,205 --> 00:11:48,742 -[Louise] Mmm. - Come here, Gene. 279 00:11:48,841 --> 00:11:50,946 - Mmm. You're a good boy. - [Grunts] 280 00:11:51,043 --> 00:11:52,647 Uh, weird. 281 00:11:52,745 --> 00:11:54,918 Mmm. 282 00:11:55,014 --> 00:11:56,493 All right. Let's Wrap this up. 283 00:11:56,582 --> 00:11:59,461 Okay, I'm ready. I'll go first. 284 00:11:59,552 --> 00:12:01,463 Like a lamb to the slaughter. 285 00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:06,893 Oh, guys! I, uh, I forgot who sang �Funkytown." 286 00:12:06,992 --> 00:12:09,598 I have to go look it up, or it's gonna bug me all night. 287 00:12:09,695 --> 00:12:11,174 - You're not going anywhere. - Aah! 288 00:12:11,263 --> 00:12:12,901 Keep Walking, Tina. 289 00:12:12,998 --> 00:12:14,238 [Groans] 290 00:12:16,235 --> 00:12:18,408 [Whispering] Are there bodies in those coffins? 291 00:12:18,504 --> 00:12:21,576 With all this green mold around town, better hope not. 292 00:12:21,674 --> 00:12:24,245 - What do you mean? - You're joking, right?[Scoffs] 293 00:12:24,343 --> 00:12:29,019 - Only that green mold turns bodies into the living dead. -[Groans] 294 00:12:29,115 --> 00:12:31,994 Tina, you're a zombiephile. You should know this! 295 00:12:32,084 --> 00:12:35,497 I'm not a zombiephile. I have a complicated relationship with zombies. 296 00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,431 They're dangerous, but I love their swagger. 297 00:12:37,523 --> 00:12:39,867 �Funkytown" is by Lipps Incorporated. I just remembered. 298 00:12:40,659 --> 00:12:42,570 The morgue. 299 00:12:43,362 --> 00:12:45,171 Well, here goes nothin'. 300 00:12:45,865 --> 00:12:47,469 [Tina Groans] 301 00:12:47,566 --> 00:12:50,672 - ? [Reggae] -[Laughing] 302 00:12:52,171 --> 00:12:54,845 Every time they say something horrible, take a drink. 303 00:12:54,940 --> 00:12:56,851 - Bob, stop. - I'm doin' it. 304 00:12:56,942 --> 00:13:01,186 So, what's the Weirdest thing you've ever found in a human body? 305 00:13:01,280 --> 00:13:03,783 - Here we go. - You first. 306 00:13:03,883 --> 00:13:05,954 - Lightbulb. -[Slurps] 307 00:13:06,051 --> 00:13:08,361 - A football. -[Slurps] 308 00:13:08,454 --> 00:13:10,024 A Far Side calendar. 309 00:13:10,122 --> 00:13:12,124 [Slurps] Really? Huh. 310 00:13:12,224 --> 00:13:15,671 But most of the time, What I find is lots and lots of- 311 00:13:15,761 --> 00:13:16,739 [Together] Tumors. 312 00:13:16,829 --> 00:13:17,807 Oh! 313 00:13:17,897 --> 00:13:20,241 [Both Laughing] 314 00:13:22,468 --> 00:13:26,644 Aw, already finishing each ether's- 315 00:13:26,739 --> 00:13:28,241 Oh, my God, no. Linda. 316 00:13:28,340 --> 00:13:30,581 - Senten- - Stop. 317 00:13:30,676 --> 00:13:32,383 Tencences- 318 00:13:32,478 --> 00:13:34,253 - Sentences. -[Slurps] 319 00:13:34,346 --> 00:13:36,917 [Creaking] 320 00:13:37,016 --> 00:13:40,088 How long does it take to open a door? 321 00:13:40,186 --> 00:13:41,324 Okay. 322 00:13:42,421 --> 00:13:44,162 [Electrical Buzzing] 323 00:13:44,256 --> 00:13:45,257 - Aah! -[Lock Clicks] 324 00:13:45,357 --> 00:13:48,736 Smells a little moldy... and corpsy. 325 00:13:48,828 --> 00:13:50,603 Bad combo. 326 00:13:50,696 --> 00:13:54,166 - I don�t think we should be here. - Yeah, let's go back upstairs. 327 00:13:54,266 --> 00:13:56,678 You're totally right, guys. 328 00:13:56,769 --> 00:13:59,147 [Rumbling] 329 00:14:00,773 --> 00:14:02,684 - It's locked. -[Rumbling] 330 00:14:03,642 --> 00:14:05,383 [Tina] Louise, no! 331 00:14:06,645 --> 00:14:07,555 [Screams] 332 00:14:07,646 --> 00:14:09,557 -[Vibrating] -[Laughs] 333 00:14:09,648 --> 00:14:12,094 Silly us. It was only a phone. 334 00:14:12,184 --> 00:14:13,754 '[Sighs] '[Sighs] 335 00:14:13,853 --> 00:14:15,560 - Hello? - Who is it? 336 00:14:15,654 --> 00:14:16,792 Some stranger. 337 00:14:16,889 --> 00:14:17,993 Hello? 338 00:14:18,090 --> 00:14:20,934 [Low-pitched] Have you checked the children? 339 00:14:21,026 --> 00:14:25,497 - Mom? -[Sighs] No. I'm a zombie. 340 00:14:25,598 --> 00:14:27,077 - Oh. -[Regular] No, I�m- 341 00:14:27,166 --> 00:14:30,545 [Low-pitched] I am also a murderer! 342 00:14:30,636 --> 00:14:32,547 [All Scream] 343 00:14:32,638 --> 00:14:34,345 - ?[Reggae] -[Laughing] 344 00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:36,647 - You go, girl. You go, girl. - Yeah, mon. 345 00:14:36,742 --> 00:14:40,280 Hey, I gotcha! Come on. Dance with Mommy. Come on. 346 00:14:40,379 --> 00:14:42,086 You drunk enough to be any fun yet? 347 00:14:42,181 --> 00:14:43,626 Yeah, I guess. 348 00:14:43,716 --> 00:14:46,390 Bob, Linda. 349 00:14:46,485 --> 00:14:48,158 Hugo, my man! 350 00:14:48,254 --> 00:14:52,259 [Buzzing Vibration] 351 00:14:54,827 --> 00:14:56,238 [Indistinct] 352 00:14:56,328 --> 00:14:58,604 Linda, I can't do it anymore. 353 00:14:58,697 --> 00:15:00,267 - Come on. - No. 354 00:15:00,366 --> 00:15:04,405 - I'm going home, Lin, to Mort's. - Don't you ignore my lasso. 355 00:15:04,503 --> 00:15:06,881 Whoa, doggie. You got me. [Chuckles] 356 00:15:06,972 --> 00:15:08,815 - Not you, Hugo. - Fair enough. 357 00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:13,118 Fine, Bob. We don't need you here anyway, you big, sour blanket. 358 00:15:13,212 --> 00:15:16,955 Who Wants to see What I learned today in salsa class? 359 00:15:20,152 --> 00:15:22,428 Ah, guess I can go finish Speed bus. 360 00:15:22,521 --> 00:15:23,659 [Chorus] ? Speed bus ? 361 00:15:23,756 --> 00:15:24,996 Then I can watch the movie. 362 00:15:25,090 --> 00:15:26,592 Hope it's as good as the model. 363 00:15:26,692 --> 00:15:27,762 �It is." 364 00:15:27,860 --> 00:15:29,464 - Keanu? -[Gene, Tina Screaming] 365 00:15:29,561 --> 00:15:33,509 Kids? Kids! Keanu, where are they? Downstairs? 366 00:15:33,599 --> 00:15:35,545 �Yeah, probably. � Thanks. 367 00:15:35,634 --> 00:15:37,545 Oh, I hate stairs. 368 00:15:37,636 --> 00:15:39,877 �We've been drinking, huh?" You got that right, buddy. 369 00:15:39,972 --> 00:15:41,883 Oh, I feel like I could pass out. 370 00:15:41,974 --> 00:15:45,183 Anybody in there? Hmm. What is that? Satin? 371 00:15:45,277 --> 00:15:48,156 Oh, man, that is calling our name, Keanu. 372 00:15:48,247 --> 00:15:51,057 �Get in there!� Will do, buddy. 373 00:15:51,150 --> 00:15:55,565 [Grunting] 374 00:15:58,123 --> 00:16:00,797 Somebody close my bed. 375 00:16:00,893 --> 00:16:03,464 [Grunts] I'll get it. 376 00:16:03,562 --> 00:16:06,736 - Unlock the door, Louise. - We know you have the key. 377 00:16:06,832 --> 00:16:09,836 Nope. I ate it. We'll have to wait till it comes out. 378 00:16:09,935 --> 00:16:11,972 You never poop. We're doomed! 379 00:16:12,071 --> 00:16:13,550 Yep. 380 00:16:13,639 --> 00:16:15,550 [Snarling] 381 00:16:15,641 --> 00:16:17,587 - What the hell? -[Snarling Loudly] 382 00:16:17,676 --> 00:16:19,713 It's coming from the next room. 383 00:16:19,812 --> 00:16:21,655 - She's messing with us again. - No. 384 00:16:21,747 --> 00:16:25,593 I swear. I did this, but I am not doing that. 385 00:16:25,684 --> 00:16:29,894 -[Snort] - I won�t get fooled again. I'm the babysitter. 386 00:16:31,523 --> 00:16:34,094 -[Rumbling Snort] - [Tina Screams] 387 00:16:34,193 --> 00:16:36,935 - [Snorting Continues] -[All Scream] 388 00:16:38,163 --> 00:16:39,506 [All Shouting] 389 00:16:39,598 --> 00:16:41,544 [Pounding] 390 00:16:41,633 --> 00:16:43,943 Kids, stop doing that. It's me. 391 00:16:44,036 --> 00:16:46,141 -[Bob, Muffled] Stop hitting the coffin! - Duct tape! 392 00:16:46,238 --> 00:16:49,617 [Louise] Hit it! Smash it! I don't want to die! 393 00:16:49,708 --> 00:16:52,052 ?[Reggae] 394 00:16:53,479 --> 00:16:54,685 [Grunting] 395 00:16:54,780 --> 00:16:56,225 Let me out! Let me out! 396 00:16:56,315 --> 00:16:58,124 - Now what? - Now... 397 00:16:58,217 --> 00:16:59,525 we cremate it. 398 00:16:59,618 --> 00:17:02,064 Cremate? No! No cremating Dad! 399 00:17:02,154 --> 00:17:03,724 [Bob, Muffled] It was a drunk nap! 400 00:17:03,822 --> 00:17:07,235 - It's trying to sweet-talk us. - That's classic zombie. 401 00:17:07,326 --> 00:17:10,603 - La, la, la. - La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la! 402 00:17:10,696 --> 00:17:12,039 Open the casket! 403 00:17:12,131 --> 00:17:14,111 - La, la, la, la! - Let me out! 404 00:17:16,201 --> 00:17:19,580 [Kids] La, la, la, la, la, la, la! 405 00:17:19,671 --> 00:17:24,142 Kids, it's your father! For the love of God, let me out! 406 00:17:24,243 --> 00:17:25,654 La, la, la, la- 407 00:17:25,744 --> 00:17:28,748 I'm gonna die alone. And I'm in my lazy pants. 408 00:17:28,847 --> 00:17:30,485 Linda hates these pants. 409 00:17:30,582 --> 00:17:33,392 Damn it! They're coming off! For you, Lin! 410 00:17:33,485 --> 00:17:35,556 - Now what? - Now we turn it on. 411 00:17:35,654 --> 00:17:38,134 - How? - Just pull all the levers... a lot. 412 00:17:38,223 --> 00:17:40,134 But they look like robot wieners. 413 00:17:40,225 --> 00:17:42,262 - I know! - Okay! 414 00:17:42,361 --> 00:17:44,602 [All Grunting] 415 00:17:44,696 --> 00:17:48,007 - It's not so bad. - Keep pulling the robot wieners. 416 00:17:48,100 --> 00:17:50,080 Whoo-hoo! I love reggae. 417 00:17:50,169 --> 00:17:54,584 Don't listen to anyone who says you can't have a perfectly good honeymoon by yourself. 418 00:17:54,673 --> 00:17:55,981 [Nervous Chuckles] 419 00:17:56,075 --> 00:17:58,282 Hey, hey! I'm not done. I'm not done. 420 00:17:58,377 --> 00:18:00,379 Let me tell you something. 421 00:18:00,479 --> 00:18:02,652 I haven't known Samantha very long. 422 00:18:02,748 --> 00:18:05,854 But a Woman knows when another Woman is aroused. 423 00:18:05,951 --> 00:18:07,021 Whoo! 424 00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:09,190 -[Nervous Chuckle] - Heh. 425 00:18:09,288 --> 00:18:10,790 [Tina] Turn that thingy While I pull this thingy. 426 00:18:10,889 --> 00:18:13,369 - You don't know how. Let me. - I'm in charge. 427 00:18:13,459 --> 00:18:14,836 [Muffled] All right. Here it goes. 428 00:18:14,927 --> 00:18:19,535 Superhuman strength. You can do it! Oh, What happened? 429 00:18:19,631 --> 00:18:20,939 - Dad? - Dad? 430 00:18:22,234 --> 00:18:25,477 - Uh-oh. - Oh, my God! I'm gonna die in here! 431 00:18:25,571 --> 00:18:26,811 Dad, I've got you. 432 00:18:26,905 --> 00:18:29,010 [Bob] Oh, burning. Coffin on fire. 433 00:18:29,942 --> 00:18:32,548 Aah! [Panting] 434 00:18:32,644 --> 00:18:36,182 Oh, yes, air. [Panting] 435 00:18:36,281 --> 00:18:38,557 - Kids, come here! -[Gene, Louise] Tina's in charge! 436 00:18:38,650 --> 00:18:39,822 - Mmm. - Oh. 437 00:18:39,918 --> 00:18:41,056 [Laughing] 438 00:18:41,153 --> 00:18:41,790 - Oh! - Aah! 439 00:18:43,755 --> 00:18:45,325 Oh, now you come off. 440 00:18:45,424 --> 00:18:47,961 What happened here? My shop's a Wreck! 441 00:18:48,060 --> 00:18:50,973 Mort, lady mortician, how's the date going? 442 00:18:51,063 --> 00:18:52,508 - Good. - Good! 443 00:18:52,598 --> 00:18:57,104 - Are you okay, Bob? - I faced death, Mort. I know things now. 444 00:18:57,202 --> 00:19:00,809 I know. You don't just build a model of life. 445 00:19:00,906 --> 00:19:02,886 You-You watch the movie of life. 446 00:19:02,975 --> 00:19:06,388 You-You get in the mood and make some mortician babies, you two. 447 00:19:06,478 --> 00:19:09,755 Mort, your name, kids are amazing. 448 00:19:09,848 --> 00:19:13,159 Even if they try to burn you alive in a coffin, and they will do that. 449 00:19:13,252 --> 00:19:14,856 -[All] Yeah. - But it's good. 450 00:19:14,953 --> 00:19:18,491 Because you see your whole life pass before you as you're burning. 451 00:19:18,590 --> 00:19:20,592 And every pair of pants you've ever worn. 452 00:19:20,692 --> 00:19:25,869 And you'll see the love of your life, dancing salsa in Jamaica by herself. 453 00:19:25,964 --> 00:19:28,376 Mort, and you, What is your name? 454 00:19:28,467 --> 00:19:29,775 Oh, Samantha. 455 00:19:29,868 --> 00:19:33,077 Yes! That's beautiful! Are you two in love or what? 456 00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:34,310 Hopefully. 457 00:19:34,406 --> 00:19:36,408 - Can I hear you say �yeah�? - Yeah! 458 00:19:36,508 --> 00:19:38,886 - Yes, we are. Yes, Bob. - Yeah! 459 00:19:38,977 --> 00:19:40,012 Great! Then feel it! 460 00:19:40,112 --> 00:19:41,318 I can feel it! Love! 461 00:19:41,413 --> 00:19:42,687 - I feel it! - Say �love�! 462 00:19:42,781 --> 00:19:44,317 - Love! - Love! 463 00:19:44,416 --> 00:19:46,418 Would you watch my kids for ten minutes? 464 00:19:46,518 --> 00:19:49,055 - Sure. - Good. I gotta go. 465 00:19:50,122 --> 00:19:54,935 Nice embalming table. ls it disinfected? 466 00:19:55,027 --> 00:19:58,133 Uh, Tina, do you think maybe you could- 467 00:19:58,230 --> 00:20:01,575 Say no more. Gene, Louise, now! 468 00:20:01,667 --> 00:20:03,647 Ow, my ear. 469 00:20:04,536 --> 00:20:05,708 [Kissing] 470 00:20:07,039 --> 00:20:08,541 No, no, no! No! No! No! 471 00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,779 -[All Scream] -[Mort] Wrong door. 472 00:20:11,810 --> 00:20:13,653 -[Bob] Hello, baby. -[Linda] Bob! 473 00:20:13,745 --> 00:20:17,124 - Ah, disgusting! - I can see your downstairs dreadlocks. 474 00:20:17,216 --> 00:20:19,526 - Go ahead and look, Jimmy. - No, mon. 475 00:20:19,618 --> 00:20:20,824 Yeah, mon. 476 00:20:20,919 --> 00:20:22,728 Oh, Bobby, you big goof. 477 00:20:22,821 --> 00:20:25,062 I took off my lazy pants. Did you notice, Lin? 478 00:20:25,157 --> 00:20:27,398 - Yes, I did. -[Hugo] God! 479 00:20:27,492 --> 00:20:30,132 Care to couples dance with me? 480 00:20:30,229 --> 00:20:32,641 On our haunted Jamaican honeymoon? 481 00:20:34,266 --> 00:20:36,906 [Chuckles] That's green mold. 482 00:20:37,002 --> 00:20:38,504 - Right there on Jimmy's wall. - What? 483 00:20:38,604 --> 00:20:39,742 You see it? Right there. 484 00:20:39,838 --> 00:20:41,840 [Linda Laughs] Yes. 485 00:20:41,940 --> 00:20:44,386 Oh, crap. She's right. 486 00:20:44,476 --> 00:20:46,422 - We win! We win! -[Chuckles] 487 00:20:46,511 --> 00:20:48,855 - Ah, just put some bleach on it. - What? 488 00:20:50,015 --> 00:20:52,154 [All] ? Weekend at Mort's ? 489 00:20:52,251 --> 00:20:55,061 ? We 're gonna have a weekend at Mort's ? 490 00:20:55,153 --> 00:20:56,223 [Linda] Uh, uh, uh! 491 00:20:56,321 --> 00:20:58,801 ? Weekend at Mort's ? 492 00:20:58,890 --> 00:21:01,200 ? We 're gonna have a weekend at Mort's ? 493 00:21:06,131 --> 00:21:07,542 [Bob, High-pitched] What? 494 00:21:09,935 --> 00:21:12,176 ? Weekend at Mort's ? 495 00:21:12,271 --> 00:21:15,411 ? We 're gonna have a weekend at Mort's ? 496 00:21:15,507 --> 00:21:17,748 ? We're gonna have a weekend at Mort's ?? 497 00:21:17,843 --> 00:21:18,878 [Linda] Uh, uh, uh! 498 00:21:20,812 --> 00:21:21,790 By Jeffreyalca 499 00:21:21,840 --> 00:21:26,390 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 37449

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