All language subtitles for S2E14-Ed The Beneficiary_Subtítulos01.ENG

[whinnies]

Hello. I'm Mister Ed.

♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪

♪ And no one can talk
to a horse, of course ♪

♪ That is, of course,
unless the horse ♪

♪ Is the famous
Mister Ed ♪

♪ Go right to the source
and ask the horse ♪

♪ He'll give you
the answer ♪

♪ That you'll endorse ♪

♪ He's always
on a steady course ♪

♪ Talk to Mister Ed ♪

Wait. I'm glad my money's
tied up in hay.

Oh, morning, Wilbur.

Never mind that.

I'm tired of you beating me
to the morning paper.

I like to read it
with my eggs.

I like to read it with my hay.

When you get finished
with the paper,

nobody else can look at it.

Say, Wilbur,
get a load of this story

here at the bottom of the page
in the corner.

"Little old lady
leaves cat $50,000."

Well, that's silly.

What do you mean silly?

What's a cat going
to do with $50,000?

Well, he won't have to chase
mice in his old age.

That's true.

He could buy himself
40 or 50 cows.

Have a lifetime
supply of milk.

That cat's got security.

Which is more than I've got.

Well, if it'll make you
feel any better,

if anything happens to me,
Carol will take care of you.

Yeah, suppose she marries
a horse-hater.

Oh, she won't. Carol
only marries nice people.

- Wilbur.
- What?

Am I mentioned in your will?

Now, wait a minute, Ed.

No horse gets better care
than you do.

You get the finest hay,
the best carrots,

and-- and something else.

Last night I went out,
and I spent $5.00 on you

for these special
mineral tablets.

They're supposed to be good
for your coat.

Well, I'm not worried
about my health.

It's your health
I'm worried about.

- Come on, Ed.
- No, thanks.

I'm a horse, not a guinea pig.

Well, if Carol finds out
I've wasted $5.00 on these,

she'll kill me.

And then marry
that horse-hater.

She will not marry
a horse-hater.

- Hi.
- Hi.

Ed, I've changed my mind.

I've decided to see a lawyer
and get a will drawn up

so that you'll
be taken care of.

Oh, that's swell.

You planning to leave
something for your wife, too?

Well, you feel
more secure now?

Yeah, maybe I won't
be a wealthy cat,

but I won't be
a starving horse.

Ooh, ah, before I go,

how about trying one of these
mineral pills, huh?

Oh, Wilbur,
I don't want that junk.

I hate to waste them.
They're so expensive.

Then you eat them.

You know, Carol is right.

I pamper you too much.

- Yeah. Oh, Wilbur.
- Yeah?

I don't know how much
you plan to leave me,

but remember one thing.

What?

That cat got 50,000.

All right, Mr. Post,
now that we've list your assets,

let's get on with the provisions
of your will.

I assume you wish to leave

the bulk of your estate
to Mrs. Post.

That's right.

I'd also like to provide
for the care of Mister Ed.

Mister Ed. A relative?

Uh, uh, no.

Friend?

Well, um, did you read
in the paper this morning

where this little old lady
left her cat $50,000?

Oh, yes.

You know, someone is sure
to contest that will.

Oh?

Anyone that would leave
that much money to a dumb animal

must be, um, shall we say, um--

Don't you agree?

Huh? This--

Oh. Yes.

[chuckles]

Now then, this Mister Ed,

how shall we describe
his relationship to you?

Well, you, um-- you better
just put down there friend.

Friend.

Mm-hmm.

And, uh, how do you want
to provide for him?

Um, food.

I'd like him to have
a lifetime supply of carrots, oats, barley.

He's a vegetarian?

Fanatically.

I'd also like to you
to put a little money aside to keep him in shoes.

I understand. Shoes.

Clothing.

Just shoes.
He doesn't wear clothes.

No, clothes?

Just a blanket.

Oh, I see.
He's an Indian, hey?

No, a Palomino.

Mister Ed is a horse?

Yes.

And I know this may sound
peculiar, Mr. Dieterle,

but, uh, there are
several other provisions

I would like included
in the will.

Yes, Mr. Post?

Well, first, his TV set must
be kept in good working order.

Your horse has his own TV set?

Well, my wife won't let him
in the house to watch with us.

Ah, she won't?

You can't blame her.

A horse doesn't belong
inside a house.

Of course not.

He's much happier where he is,
in my office.

Your office?

Well, it's really a corner
of the barn that I converted.

I see.

[clears throat]

Will there be, uh,
anything else, Mr. Post?

No.

Well, I think I have
all the necessary information.

Now, if you'll just have
Mrs. Post come down here.

Oh, no, no, I don't want my wife
to know anything about this.

You see, she feels
that I'm overly attached to my horse.

What ever gave her that idea?

Well, you know women.

[chuckles]

Yes.

Well, now, before my secretary
types this up,

let's just review these notes.

"I, Wilbur Post,
being of sound mind...

"and not being actuated
by any duress, menace, fraud,

"or undue influence
whatsoever..."

Well, Ed, it's all finished.

I just made out my will.

Good.

Who did you name as executor?

Executor?

You know, the one
who hands out the loot.

Oh, oh, Addison.

Aw, Wilbur, he hates me.

That's like cutting me off
without one red carrot.

Wait a minute, Ed.

You may not like Roger,

but when the chips are down,

he's a perfectly gentle
and honest man.

Yeah?

Name me one animal-lover
who had a mustache.

Theodore Roosevelt.

Please.
He was cruel to horses.

Theodore Roosevelt?

Well, sure.

Why do you think
they called him a Rough Rider?

Oh, Ed, will you stop worrying?

I tell you, Roger Addison
is a perfectly honest man.

You'll get all the food
that's coming to you.

Yeah? With him
dishing out my hay,

I'd hire a food-taster.

What do you want me to do?

Call the lawyer.

Tell him
when you named Addison,

it was temporary insanity.

And tell me, who do you want
as executor?

Well, I know of somebody
who's fair, honest, and completely trustworthy.

Yeah? Who?

Me.

Oh, you crazy horse.

[chuckles]

Please, Mr. Sweeney,
my husband's home today.

Mr. Sweeney.

Oh, Wilbur, I thought
it was the milkman.

Still think it's the milkman?

No.

Mm, that was more like
the butcher.

Come here, you Jezabel.

[Carol laughs]

[both laugh]

Why all this sudden affection?

Well, honey,
I've been thinking.

If something should happen to me
and you should marry again,

what sort of man
would you marry?

Mm, someone like you--

Tall, dark, sophisticated,
with a French accent.

I'm serious, Carol.

Wilbur, what brought
all this on?

Well, I mean, we've got
to be realistic, you know.

A man's got to provide
for his loved ones.

Oh, Wilbur, really.

Well, I mean,
I've been thinking,

if something
should happen to me,

who would take care
of Mister Ed?

Ed?

You mean, who would take
care of me?

Well, Ed and you.

You and Ed.

What I mean is, if something
should happen to me,

would you take care of Ed?
That's what I mean.

Are you all right?

Oh, I'm fine.

Just promise me one thing--

you won't marry a horse-hater.

All right, I promise.

Well, let's have breakfast.

[humming]

Oh, hi, honey.

Where have you been
all morning?

Oh, out on business.

Wow, it's, uh,
time for Ed's lunch.

Carol, how about you
feeding him?

Me?

Yeah, well, I think you ought
to get used to feeding him.

Why?

Well, that way you can both
get to know each other better.

Oh, Wilbur, please.

I'm-- I'm too busy
to feed Mister Ed.

I wish you'd take
an interest in him, Carol.

You could give him
love, security.

All right,
get me some steel wool,

and-- and I'll knit him
a pair of horseshoes.

Don't joke about it, Carol.

Ed needs you.

Why, if something
ever happened to me,

you can get married.

Ed couldn't.

Have you got your clothes
ready yet, Carol?

My little doll
is going to drive us down to the cleaners.

Oh, thanks, Rog.

It's only fair.

She's been taking me
to the cleaners for years.

Oh, Roger.

- Can I help you with those?
- Oh, thank you.

Where's Wilbur?
I haven't seen him all morning.

He's feeding Ed.

Roger, I'm worried about him.

Why? Is anything wrong?

Well, I don't know.

Roger, you're his best friend.

Is he all right?

Of course.

Physically he's fine.

Of course mentally,
that's a different story.

Oh, stop being such a clown.

Can't you see she's worried?

Believe me, my dear.
You have nothing to worry about.

I'm sure that Wilbur
is in perfect health.

[sighs]

I guess I'm worrying
about nothing.

Actually--

What's this?

My goodness, look at the size
of that pill.

I've seen smaller
bowling balls.

Wilbur's never taken
a pill in his life.

Why has he been hiding
this from me?

Oh, they're probably
just vitamin pills.

Has he complained
about feeling sick lately?

No, on the contrary.

Last night he took me dancing

and then for a moonlight ride
on the beach.

Oh, he hasn't been so romantic
since our honeymoon.

Come on, doll.
Open up for Mommy.

Oh, come on now, Kay.
Cut that out.

Well, there goes
my moonlight ride.

Don't look so grim, Carol.

As Kay says, I'm sure
these are only vitamin pills.

Well, of course, sweetie.

If there was anything wrong
with Wilbur, you'd know it.

Oh, that's right.

If it hadn't been for you two,
I'd be a nervous wreck.

As long as your mind
is at ease, my dear.

[phone rings]

Oh, excuse me.

Hello?

Hello, is Mr. Post in?

No, this is Mrs. Post.
Is there any message?

Yes, please.

I'm calling
for your husband's attorney.

Mr. Dieterle left town,
and he asked me to inform Mr. Post

that his will would be ready
for notarization this Monday.

What's the matter, honey?

Wilbur made out a will
without telling me.

Oh, now, there you go again,
Carol.

Just because your husband
has been talking morbidly

and made out a will
and carries around a few pills--

Courage, my dear.

[laughing]

That tickles.

Watch my mole.

You're feeling more secure
now that you know you're mentioned in my will, huh?

You're all heart, Wilbur.

And I want you
to know something.

What is it, Ed?

If I should go first,
everything I own goes to you.

Well, that's very kind of you,
but I'll look kind of silly

walking around
with horseshoes and a saddle.

I wish I could leave you
something, Wilbur.

Oh, Ed, you'll be leaving me
wonderful memories

of a horse that is
faithful and kind.

A true friend and a pal.

There'll never be another horse
like you, Ed.

[sniffles]

What's wrong?

I'm not even gone,
and I miss me already.

Oh, Ed.

Aah.

Sorry, Ed.

Oh.

I got to go.

We're having dinner
tonight at the Addisons'.

Now, remember,
I expect you to be brave.

Now, let's all smile,
pretend to be gay.

Wilbur, come in.

Sorry, I'm late, Rog.

Oh, think nothing of it,
old boy.

Go ahead. The girls
are waiting for you.

Boy, what a beautiful night.

Why are you all smiling?

Uh, Addison just told us
a very funny joke.

[both laugh]

Oh, I heard a very funny joke
today.

It seems this farmer
came out from the east,

and he was a little confused
by the change of time, you see.

So he woke up one morning
three hours early

and started to milk the cow
while the cow was still asleep.

Suddenly the cow woke up

and said,
"Thank heavens it's you.

"I thought
I was being robbed."

[laughs]

Gee, I don't know.

When I heard the joke,
I-- I thought I'd die.

Oh, Wilbur, please.

Uh, Wilbur,

I'm going to the doctor tomorrow
for my annual checkup.

How about coming
along with me?

Why? Are you
scared of doctors?

No, I just like company.

Well, now that the cans
are all open,

shall we have dinner?

Yes.

[phone rings]

Oh, pardon me.

Hello?

Yes, yes, he's here.

Wilbur, it's for you.

Hold it just a minute.

Thanks, Rog.

Hello?

Roger, I can't stand it.

I'm going to ask him
what's wrong with him.

Yeah, maybe she should.

You'll never get Wilbur
to your doctor.

No, but maybe I can get
my doctor to come to him.

But, Roger, you heard him.

Wilbur would never submit
to an examination,

not if he's trying
to hide something from me.

He'll never even know that he's
being examined by a doctor.

Well, how in the world
are you going to do that?

Dr. Reynolds happens
to be an excellent golfer.

I'll introduce him
as a golf instructor.

Now, leave everything to me.

[Kay]
Carol.

Oh, hi, Kay.

Has the doctor--

Not doctor, golf pro.

Where's Wilbur?

Upstairs changing
into his golf clothes.

He's so excited
about this lesson he thinks he's taking.

Oh, now, my dear, remember,
you promised to be brave.

Yes, there's no sense
in worrying, angel.

The doctor might find--

Shh.

I mean the golf pro might find
he's not so sick after all.

Kay, why don't
you wait outside, huh?

Addison, I promise you
I won't say a word.

[doorbell rings]

That's the doctor.
I'll let him--

Shh.

Why don't you wait out
on the patio, loose lips?

I'll get it.

Hello, John.

Rog, how are you?

Come in. Uh, he's upstairs.

John Reynolds,
this is Carol Post.

- How do you do?
- How do you do?

- You have a lovely home.
- Thank you.

And my wife Kay.

How do you do?

My husband tells me that you're
one of the finest doctors--

I'll be out on the patio.

Roger, I'm only doing this
out of friendship for you

and to relieve
Mrs. Post's anxiety.

Oh, and I appreciate it
so much.

Well, now you understand,
I can't give your husband

a thorough physical
examination this way.

We realize that, John.

Just check him
for the major symptoms.

Later, we'll get him
to your office for a complete check up.

Fine.

[Wilbur]
Honey, is the golf pro here yet?

Yes, Wilbur, he's here.

I'll wait outside.

- Hi, Wilbur.
- Hi.

Wilbur Post, John Reynolds.

- How do you do?
- Hello, John.

Boy, this is a real treat
for me.

Roger's been telling me how much
you've improved his game.

Well, he's been
a very apt pupil.

Now, if you'll just
sit down and watch,

I'll demonstrate
the proper stance.

Okay.

All right.

Now, the most important thing

in getting a good,
smooth stroke

is to pivot your knee correctly.

Oh, which knee?

That one.

Oh, that's fine. Fine.

Now, you take the club

because I want to check
your grip.

Oh, all right.

There we are.

Uh, right hand first.

There we are.

Good. Now, nice grip.

Firm but gentle.

That's it.

Uh, now, what did you say
your golf score is?

99.

Uh, what was that?

99.

Louder, please.

99!

Fine, fine.

- What's fine?
- Uh, your grip.

Oh, thank you.

Now, let's see
about those shoulders.

They must be straight,
you know.

- [giggling] Please.
- I'll try not to tickle you.

- Ticklish.
- Yes.

Now, let's see. No tenseness.
No tenseness.

Now, let's see. Would you take
a deep breath for me, please?

Deep breath?

Oh, yes. It's very important,
you know,

just before you hit the ball
to hold your breath.

- Gets the power.
- Power, that's right. Power.

Now, would you breathe for me?

Let it out.

That's fine.

Very good.

Now, let's see. We better--

We better check on
your backswing, I think.

- Okay.
- Let me help you here.

There we go.
Up, up, up slowly.

Slowly. There we go.

Now, when you get
to the top of the swing,

it's very important to pause.

How long?

Uh, five seconds.

1, 2,

3, 4, 5.

Good, good.

Very good.

Somebody could've
played through.

Yes. Now, let's see.

Uh, we've taken care
of your backswing.

Now, we'll attend
to the downswing in a minute,

but first I want to check
your sense of balance.

Uh, would you close
your eyes, please

and hold your hands out
in front of you?

I never had a lesson
like this before.

And you never will again.

Uh, listen to him, Wilbur.
Listen to him.

He took six strokes
off my game.

Uh, would you close your eyes,
please?

- Yeah.
- Hands out in front of you.

Now, have you got
your eyes closed?

- Yes.
- All right.

Now, let's see.
We'll check this balance here.

Well, it seems to be
all right there.

That's fine.

Is this for the grip
or the swing?

Uh, everything. Everything.
It covers everything.

- Overall.
- Yeah, mm-hmm.

Let's see.

Yes, I think you're doing
just fine.

- Oh, good.
- You should make a good gol--

Oh, oh, eyes closed.

Oh, sorry, I thought
you were finished.

Now, now, hold your hands out.

Now, would you lift
your right leg for me, please?

Lift my leg?

Yes, lift your leg.
Keep your eyes closed.

Hands out, leg up.
There we are.

Very good. Mm-hmm.

Mm-hmm, yeah,
that's all right.

This is the strangest
golf lesson.

Yes, well, you can't teach a man
to line up a put properly

unless he's got
good peripheral vision.

Yeah, looks fine. Fine.

Excuse me.

[phone rings]

Hello?

Wilbur, that golf pro
is really a doctor.

He is?

You wouldn't go for a checkup,

so they're bringing
the checkup to you.

Oh.

Well, thank you for the call.

They had me terribly worried
with that doctor.

You ought to teach them
a lesson.

I, uh-- I think you're right.

And I will.

Goodbye, Mr. Jackson.

Well, uh, where were we?

[coughs]

Wilbur, what is
the matter with you?

Well, I-- Nothing, I--

Huh?

I always get
these nervous attacks when I worry.

What do you worry about?

Getting these nervous attacks.

Well, tell me, how long
have you had these attacks?

Oh--
[coughs]

Just since I fell
off my horse.

Wilbur, you never told me
you fell off a horse.

Well, I didn't
really fall off it.

I-- I fainted.

Do you get
these attacks often?

Oh, only when my wife
isn't around.

I don't like to worry her.

Oh, Wilbur.

Haven't got time now, honey.

Got to continue
with our golf lesson.

Uh, how about a little
putting practice, doctor?

Look, I'm sorry.

You knew it all the time,
didn't you?

Oh, of course. Golf pro.
With those bloomers?

You got M.D.
written all over you.

And, Carol, I mean,

that was a pretty sneaking way
of getting a man examined.

Oh, but-- but you're sick,
and you refused--

Wait-- Wait.

What ever gave you the idea
that I am sick?

Well, that will you made out

and those pills I found
in your pocket.

Honey, those pills are for Ed
and so was the will.

For Ed?

Excuse me. Who is Ed?

Ed is my horse.

You made out a will
to your horse?

Well, that's no stranger

than making out
a will to a cat.

Roger, let's get on
with the examination. You hold him.

What?

Now-- Now, wait a minute.
Rog-- No, that's silly.

- Breathe deeply please.
- That's silly!

Exhale.

Poor old Ed.

They sure had me worried
with that doctor.

Yeah, you were practically
in tears over the phone.

You're all I've got, Wilbur.

I know, Ed.

I'm really your next of kin.

To me, you're
like a blood brother.

Thanks, Ed.

Well, at least you're
well provided for now.

Say, how did she take it
when you told her I was in your will?

What do you mean
how did she take it?

I just told her
that from now on I was the boss,

that's the way I wanted it,
and that was that.

[laughs]

Oh, boy, that's telling her.

Good night, boss.

Good night, Ed.

♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪

♪ And no one can talk
to a horse, of course ♪

♪ That is, of course,
unless the horse ♪

♪ Is the famous Mister Ed ♪

♪ Go right to the source
and ask the horse ♪

♪ He'll give you
the answer ♪

♪ That you'll endorse ♪

♪ He's always
on a steady course ♪

♪ Talk to Mister Ed ♪

♪ People yakkity-yak
a streak ♪

♪ And waste
your time of day ♪

♪ But Mister Ed
will never speak ♪

♪ Unless he has
something to say ♪

♪ A horse is a horse,
of course, of course ♪

♪ And this one will talk
till his voice is hoarse ♪

♪ You never heard
of a talking horse? ♪

♪ Well, listen to this ♪

[Mister Ed]
♪ I am Mister Ed ♪

Closed-Captioned By
J.R. Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA

[Man]
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