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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:09,010 --> 00:00:12,013
[music playing]
2
00:01:13,908 --> 00:01:15,743
[Brian] We moved here
about a month ago.
3
00:01:17,078 --> 00:01:20,999
My parents, they said it'd be better
for me and my brother Eric.
4
00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:24,586
They always say that
when they want something.
5
00:01:25,670 --> 00:01:27,338
Everything's different.
6
00:01:28,339 --> 00:01:32,427
All the streets had different names,
all my friends were far away.
7
00:01:33,428 --> 00:01:34,762
I was miserable.
8
00:01:35,763 --> 00:01:37,181
I hated it.
9
00:01:38,516 --> 00:01:42,145
Till I met my first friend-- Maurice.
10
00:01:43,938 --> 00:01:48,526
I'll never, ever have
a friend like him again.
11
00:01:48,610 --> 00:01:49,611
[clock ticking]
12
00:01:49,694 --> 00:01:51,696
??
13
00:01:59,329 --> 00:02:00,538
[clanking softly]
14
00:02:06,002 --> 00:02:06,836
[clanking stops]
15
00:02:06,919 --> 00:02:08,921
??
16
00:02:39,285 --> 00:02:41,204
- [object clatters]
- [mother] Damnit, I hate this.
17
00:02:41,287 --> 00:02:43,289
[father] You wanted a bigger house,
a fixer-upper.
18
00:02:43,373 --> 00:02:46,751
[mother] I wanted something both of us
could do together, and you're never here.
19
00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:49,212
[father] You think I like commuting
two hours to a job I hate?
20
00:02:49,295 --> 00:02:51,255
[mother] I thought things would be
different here.
21
00:02:51,339 --> 00:02:53,299
I thought we'd spend time together.
22
00:02:53,383 --> 00:02:54,884
[father] You're the one
who stopped working.
23
00:02:54,967 --> 00:02:56,761
You think I like
being a stranger to my kids?
24
00:02:56,844 --> 00:02:58,054
- [mother] I don't know.
- Oh, come on!
25
00:02:58,137 --> 00:02:59,847
I'm not a monster, I'm a man.
26
00:02:59,931 --> 00:03:01,599
[mother] I'm not sure
there's a big difference.
27
00:03:01,683 --> 00:03:03,101
[father] Great, now I'm a monster?
28
00:03:03,184 --> 00:03:06,062
[mother] Look, I just wish you'd
be here when you're here.
29
00:03:06,145 --> 00:03:08,147
??
30
00:03:26,416 --> 00:03:28,501
- [TV turns on]
- ? It's time to play ?
31
00:03:28,584 --> 00:03:32,088
- ? With our man Sam Yahay ?
- Hi, my name's Sam Yahay,
32
00:03:32,171 --> 00:03:36,342
and welcome to Channel 98 cable access,
All About Chicks.
33
00:03:36,426 --> 00:03:39,095
- Today, my guest is Lovey.
- Lani.
34
00:03:39,178 --> 00:03:40,513
Oh, sorry, Lani, right.
35
00:03:40,596 --> 00:03:42,432
So, Lani, tell me, where are you from?
36
00:03:42,515 --> 00:03:46,269
I'm from Fort Lauderdale,
but I'm dying to go to L.A.
37
00:03:46,352 --> 00:03:48,604
- [Eric screams] Mommy!
- Yeah, right. So, uh, Lani...
38
00:03:49,605 --> 00:03:50,773
Mommy!
39
00:03:50,857 --> 00:03:52,150
What do you think
about the world economy?
40
00:03:52,233 --> 00:03:53,234
[TV shuts off]
41
00:03:57,363 --> 00:04:00,950
[Eric] Mommy! Mommy,
Mommy, a monster!
42
00:04:01,033 --> 00:04:03,786
A monster! Mommy, Mommy, a monster!
43
00:04:04,787 --> 00:04:05,788
A monster!
44
00:04:06,873 --> 00:04:09,959
- Mom, a monster!
- Oh, honey, are you all right?
45
00:04:11,127 --> 00:04:14,422
Okay, now, there was
a monster in your dream.
46
00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:15,798
I was wide awake!
47
00:04:15,882 --> 00:04:17,884
Oh, well, it was probably
just your mommy snoring.
48
00:04:17,967 --> 00:04:20,720
This is no joke, Dad.
There was a real monster.
49
00:04:20,803 --> 00:04:22,472
Really?
50
00:04:22,555 --> 00:04:24,182
Honey, there's no such thing as monsters.
51
00:04:24,265 --> 00:04:28,102
It ran in from the hall,
grabbed my ankle, and slid under my bed.
52
00:04:28,186 --> 00:04:30,021
- Under the bed?
- Uh-huh.
53
00:04:31,355 --> 00:04:33,357
- Under the bed?
- Yeah.
54
00:04:34,609 --> 00:04:36,194
No, Dad, don't!
55
00:04:36,277 --> 00:04:38,738
[yelling]
56
00:04:42,200 --> 00:04:45,620
Yuck. [laughs]
57
00:04:45,703 --> 00:04:47,455
- No monsters.
- Sick.
58
00:04:47,538 --> 00:04:49,916
I guess all the dust bunnies
scared him away.
59
00:04:49,999 --> 00:04:51,417
Bunny?
60
00:04:51,501 --> 00:04:55,213
No, no, no bunnies, no monsters.
There is nothing under your bed.
61
00:04:55,296 --> 00:04:57,048
Now, why don't you just go to sleep, okay?
62
00:04:57,131 --> 00:04:58,466
Can I have the flashlight?
63
00:04:58,549 --> 00:05:00,343
Sure, honey. Would you get it?
64
00:05:00,426 --> 00:05:03,471
Honey, I thought we-- I'll get the, uh...
65
00:05:05,223 --> 00:05:07,141
get the flashlight.
66
00:05:07,225 --> 00:05:09,477
Okay, come on, tuck up.
67
00:05:12,396 --> 00:05:15,608
You know, I bet those monsters are
more afraid of you than you are of them.
68
00:05:16,651 --> 00:05:18,820
- I know.
- Once you realize they don't exist,
69
00:05:18,903 --> 00:05:21,239
poof! They disappear.
70
00:05:21,322 --> 00:05:23,866
Now, that's a lot of power.
71
00:05:26,911 --> 00:05:28,621
[growling]
72
00:05:29,956 --> 00:05:31,958
[growling continues]
73
00:05:32,041 --> 00:05:33,543
[sighs] Glen...
74
00:05:33,626 --> 00:05:35,086
[growling continues]
75
00:05:38,214 --> 00:05:40,383
- Don't burn up the batteries, okay?
- Dad...
76
00:05:40,466 --> 00:05:43,219
- I won't.
- Good night, sweetheart.
77
00:05:43,302 --> 00:05:45,721
- All right, have a good sleep.
- Good night, Mom. Good night, Dad.
78
00:05:45,805 --> 00:05:46,889
[mother] Good night, honey.
79
00:05:46,973 --> 00:05:48,975
??
80
00:05:51,561 --> 00:05:52,770
Do you think he heard us?
81
00:05:53,855 --> 00:05:56,232
Of course he heard us.
That's what scared him.
82
00:06:09,078 --> 00:06:11,998
[dog barking in distance]
83
00:06:28,973 --> 00:06:30,349
[chatter on radio]
84
00:06:30,433 --> 00:06:31,684
[mother] Eric, did you take your vitamins?
85
00:06:31,767 --> 00:06:33,769
- Yes.
- Good boy.
86
00:06:34,770 --> 00:06:37,899
Okay, no trading for Twinkies today.
87
00:06:37,982 --> 00:06:41,235
- Oh, come on, Mom. I don't do that.
- [groans]
88
00:06:46,699 --> 00:06:49,410
Then you carry over the one.
89
00:06:49,493 --> 00:06:50,995
- Hi, Dad. Hey, Mom.
- Good morning.
90
00:06:51,078 --> 00:06:52,246
Hi, honey.
91
00:06:53,623 --> 00:06:54,999
Hope whatever you watched on TV last night
92
00:06:55,082 --> 00:06:57,585
was worth your allowance
and two weeks of TV.
93
00:06:57,668 --> 00:06:59,253
- Huh?
- "Huh"?
94
00:06:59,337 --> 00:07:00,880
We found the sandwich, Brian.
95
00:07:02,673 --> 00:07:04,508
What sandwich?
96
00:07:04,592 --> 00:07:07,511
Brian Arthur Stevenson,
you are the only person in this family
97
00:07:07,595 --> 00:07:09,555
who eats peanut butter
and onion sandwiches.
98
00:07:10,556 --> 00:07:13,893
You think every time you get caught,
you can just lie your way out of it?
99
00:07:13,976 --> 00:07:16,395
- [pipes clanking]
- [mother] Damn.
100
00:07:16,479 --> 00:07:18,230
Damn it.
101
00:07:18,314 --> 00:07:19,774
The plumber's coming next week.
102
00:07:19,857 --> 00:07:22,193
Great, I can leave him all these dishes.
103
00:07:22,276 --> 00:07:25,571
[Glen] Just keep telling yourself
it's our dream house.
104
00:07:25,655 --> 00:07:28,324
It's our dream house,
it's our dream house,
105
00:07:28,407 --> 00:07:30,201
it's our dream house.
106
00:07:30,284 --> 00:07:31,744
- [faucet clanks]
- Ugh.
107
00:07:34,080 --> 00:07:35,039
[snickers]
108
00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:38,459
["How I Love You" by Frankie Paul
playing on radio]
109
00:07:46,384 --> 00:07:47,677
You're dead, mister.
110
00:07:48,844 --> 00:07:51,764
- Hey, I didn't do anything.
- Just like the sandwich?
111
00:07:51,847 --> 00:07:53,391
All right, all right, fine. I admit it.
112
00:07:53,474 --> 00:07:56,978
I did have a sandwich,
but I did not have any ice cream.
113
00:07:57,061 --> 00:07:59,438
Why do you always blame everything on me?
114
00:07:59,522 --> 00:08:02,024
Hey, well, somebody put
scuff marks on the door kicking them open
115
00:08:02,108 --> 00:08:04,694
and somebody puts gum under the table.
116
00:08:04,777 --> 00:08:08,906
Brian, you are old enough to know
the difference between right and wrong.
117
00:08:08,990 --> 00:08:10,825
Why don't you start acting it?
118
00:08:12,493 --> 00:08:15,079
"Why don't you start acting it," Dad?
119
00:08:24,505 --> 00:08:28,384
Look at it this way.
The day can only get better.
120
00:08:28,467 --> 00:08:31,637
Great, then can I stay home from school?
121
00:08:34,015 --> 00:08:35,933
Are you sorry we moved?
122
00:08:36,017 --> 00:08:37,143
I hate it here.
123
00:08:38,144 --> 00:08:40,521
Guess you miss your friends, huh?
124
00:08:40,604 --> 00:08:42,565
Mom, it's killing me.
125
00:08:44,150 --> 00:08:47,069
You know, the realtor, Mr. Coleman,
he had a kid about your age.
126
00:08:47,153 --> 00:08:48,779
Ronnie Coleman's a toad.
127
00:08:48,863 --> 00:08:50,781
Well, he seemed like a nice kid to me.
128
00:08:50,865 --> 00:08:54,618
Great, then you can invite him over
for milk and dead flies.
129
00:08:54,702 --> 00:08:57,663
I would, but your father ate 'em all.
130
00:08:57,747 --> 00:08:59,540
- [snickers]
- [crash]
131
00:08:59,623 --> 00:09:01,542
[man on radio] The stock market
tumbled sharply
132
00:09:01,625 --> 00:09:03,627
as the slide most were anticipating
finally happened.
133
00:09:03,711 --> 00:09:05,504
- The Dow Jones Industrial Average...
- Brian!
134
00:09:05,588 --> 00:09:09,341
[radio continues indistinct]
135
00:09:13,512 --> 00:09:16,265
My bike! You ran over it!
136
00:09:16,348 --> 00:09:19,393
My car. Whose fault is this, Brian?
137
00:09:20,394 --> 00:09:23,564
Uh-uh, no way.
I parked it right over there. Right there.
138
00:09:23,647 --> 00:09:25,649
Oh, right, right.
So, before I got in the car,
139
00:09:25,733 --> 00:09:28,152
I went around and put the bike there
myself? Forget it, Charlie.
140
00:09:28,235 --> 00:09:31,530
First my shirt, now this.
I'm 15 minutes late here.
141
00:09:31,614 --> 00:09:33,449
What do you expect me
to do with my bike?
142
00:09:33,532 --> 00:09:34,950
Look, it-- it's destroyed!
143
00:09:35,034 --> 00:09:37,495
Well, you're gonna have
to learn to ride it like that.
144
00:09:37,578 --> 00:09:40,539
You're grounded for two weeks,
no TV for three,
145
00:09:40,623 --> 00:09:43,042
and you can forget about your allowance
till that car is paid up.
146
00:09:43,125 --> 00:09:46,212
- Glen, isn't that a little rough?
- Holly, don't make me the villain here.
147
00:09:46,295 --> 00:09:49,048
So, Dad, you mean to tell me
that my bike is ruined,
148
00:09:49,131 --> 00:09:52,051
and your car has a little dent in it,
I'm being punished?
149
00:09:52,134 --> 00:09:53,260
That's not fair!
150
00:09:53,344 --> 00:09:55,387
Somebody put it there, Brian.
151
00:09:57,264 --> 00:09:59,225
[Todd] And it didn't slime you.
You sure?
152
00:09:59,308 --> 00:10:02,228
Sure I'm sure. I think I'd know
if I was slimed.
153
00:10:02,311 --> 00:10:06,857
And it didn't go into the closet?
You know, like, to rip something off?
154
00:10:06,941 --> 00:10:10,027
- Nope.
- What about your desk?
155
00:10:10,111 --> 00:10:12,363
It didn't do
your geography homework, did it?
156
00:10:12,446 --> 00:10:15,866
Look, Todd, I never would've
told you about this, but--
157
00:10:15,950 --> 00:10:17,785
Okay, all right.
158
00:10:17,868 --> 00:10:21,705
So, this is an exclusively under-the-bed
phenomenon we're dealing with here.
159
00:10:21,789 --> 00:10:24,625
That's right, exclusively under my bed.
160
00:10:29,046 --> 00:10:30,631
It really was a monster.
161
00:10:30,714 --> 00:10:34,468
- Really? What did it look like?
- I don't know.
162
00:10:34,552 --> 00:10:35,594
[both] Hi, Kiersten.
163
00:10:36,595 --> 00:10:37,888
Hi.
164
00:10:46,730 --> 00:10:47,815
[bus driver] Slow down!
165
00:10:47,898 --> 00:10:49,150
Eric, you toad.
166
00:10:49,233 --> 00:10:50,985
Why aren't you riding your bike?
167
00:10:51,068 --> 00:10:54,488
What bike? Dad ran over it
because you left it in the driveway.
168
00:10:54,572 --> 00:10:56,824
No way. Your bike?
169
00:10:56,907 --> 00:10:59,451
- No way!
- Look, I put it away.
170
00:10:59,535 --> 00:11:03,080
Mom and Dad sure wouldn't touch it.
So that only leaves you.
171
00:11:03,164 --> 00:11:04,707
I didn't touch your bike.
172
00:11:04,790 --> 00:11:06,667
I can hardly reach the pedals.
173
00:11:06,750 --> 00:11:08,919
All right, that's it.
You lie to me, you starve.
174
00:11:09,003 --> 00:11:12,798
My lunch!
You jerk, I didn't do anything!
175
00:11:12,882 --> 00:11:14,967
Oh, yeah, right.
And what about that ice cream?
176
00:11:15,050 --> 00:11:16,844
You snuck some ice cream last night,
too, didn't ya?
177
00:11:16,927 --> 00:11:18,846
Forget it. Don't blame it on me.
178
00:11:18,929 --> 00:11:21,473
- The monster.
- That's it.
179
00:11:21,557 --> 00:11:24,602
- That's what it was doing.
- There are no monsters.
180
00:11:24,685 --> 00:11:26,437
[grunts, thuds]
181
00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,856
- Who's Eric?
- [kids] Uh-oh.
182
00:11:28,939 --> 00:11:33,819
Who's the Eric who threw his lunch at me?
183
00:11:33,903 --> 00:11:36,030
[whispers] He did.
184
00:11:36,113 --> 00:11:38,616
You Eric?
185
00:11:38,699 --> 00:11:41,994
You want this back?
186
00:11:43,537 --> 00:11:44,914
[bus driver] Sit down back there!
187
00:11:44,997 --> 00:11:47,499
Why don't you pick on someone
your own size?
188
00:11:47,583 --> 00:11:49,084
Like Bigfoot.
189
00:11:50,836 --> 00:11:53,214
Maybe I will.
190
00:11:53,297 --> 00:11:55,841
- [brakes squeal]
- [grunts]
191
00:11:55,925 --> 00:11:57,843
[children laughing]
192
00:11:57,927 --> 00:12:02,348
Get back in your seats
or I'll destroy every one of you!
193
00:12:02,431 --> 00:12:04,058
You're dead meat, Stevenson.
194
00:12:04,141 --> 00:12:06,727
[laughter continues]
195
00:12:08,812 --> 00:12:10,189
Yeah.
196
00:12:11,690 --> 00:12:13,025
Ow!
197
00:12:14,401 --> 00:12:15,486
[Ronnie] Stevenson!
198
00:12:15,569 --> 00:12:17,780
If it's the last thing I do today,
I'm gonna make you eat this shirt.
199
00:12:17,863 --> 00:12:19,740
[kids chanting]
Fight, fight, fight, fight.
200
00:12:19,823 --> 00:12:22,576
Listen, Coleman, I'm surprised you
haven't eaten it already.
201
00:12:22,660 --> 00:12:25,204
- Huh? Huh?
- Why you...
202
00:12:25,287 --> 00:12:26,997
[boy] Nail his head!
203
00:12:28,165 --> 00:12:30,668
The principal!
204
00:12:30,751 --> 00:12:32,753
[boy] Cool it, man.
Here comes Turner!
205
00:12:32,836 --> 00:12:34,255
[boy 2] Come on, cool it, guys.
206
00:12:34,338 --> 00:12:36,215
Break it up. Break it up.
207
00:12:36,298 --> 00:12:38,634
Break it up!
208
00:12:38,717 --> 00:12:40,803
What is going on here?
209
00:12:40,886 --> 00:12:43,889
Sir, I was just showing Brian
what he did to my shirt
210
00:12:43,973 --> 00:12:47,226
- and he pushed me away.
- Oh, come on--
211
00:12:47,309 --> 00:12:51,063
- Stevenson, you're new here, aren't you?
- Yes, sir.
212
00:12:51,146 --> 00:12:53,941
Well, I think we'd better have
a little talk in my office.
213
00:12:54,024 --> 00:12:56,193
You have rules to learn.
214
00:12:56,277 --> 00:12:59,280
Toodles, Bri. [laughs]
215
00:12:59,363 --> 00:13:01,365
??
216
00:13:11,041 --> 00:13:11,875
[flips light switch]
217
00:13:16,171 --> 00:13:17,548
- [gasps]
- Whoa!
218
00:13:17,631 --> 00:13:20,301
There's enough power in here
to light up Yankee Stadium.
219
00:13:20,384 --> 00:13:22,970
- Already out on parole?
- Very funny.
220
00:13:33,480 --> 00:13:35,149
So what's up, Miss Deveaux?
221
00:13:35,232 --> 00:13:37,109
You really wanna know
or you're just askin'?
222
00:13:37,192 --> 00:13:38,569
- I really wanna know.
- [camera clicks]
223
00:13:40,279 --> 00:13:41,196
[clicks]
224
00:13:42,239 --> 00:13:44,575
Disgusting. Your face may
corrode the camera.
225
00:13:45,909 --> 00:13:47,953
Whoa.
226
00:13:48,037 --> 00:13:50,956
- This is cool.
- Don't touch. It's fragile.
227
00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:53,042
It's a night-blooming cactus.
228
00:13:53,125 --> 00:13:56,712
I wanna see if artificial sunlight
changes its normal blooming pattern.
229
00:13:56,795 --> 00:13:58,964
I'm training it to bloom in the daytime.
230
00:13:59,048 --> 00:14:03,177
To be scientific,
I document the results with Polaroids.
231
00:14:06,972 --> 00:14:08,140
Hey, you know what?
232
00:14:09,141 --> 00:14:12,978
If you mounted the camera
in one spot, like, upside down,
233
00:14:13,062 --> 00:14:15,272
you could take
a whole bunch of pictures
234
00:14:15,356 --> 00:14:18,317
and make them into like,
you know, like a movie.
235
00:14:20,486 --> 00:14:22,488
Here, look.
236
00:14:24,865 --> 00:14:27,826
Like time-lapse photography.
That's great.
237
00:14:27,910 --> 00:14:30,829
Yeah, um, so I guess it's all set.
238
00:14:30,913 --> 00:14:33,415
- Me and you will team up on the project.
- Forget it, Brian.
239
00:14:33,499 --> 00:14:35,501
I'll end up doing all the work. No chance.
240
00:14:35,584 --> 00:14:37,169
Find somebody else to leech off of.
241
00:14:37,252 --> 00:14:38,837
Hey, all right. You know what?
242
00:14:38,921 --> 00:14:41,632
Think about it, take your time.
You'll probably change your mind.
243
00:14:46,053 --> 00:14:48,055
??
244
00:15:11,578 --> 00:15:15,874
Hey, if you say there's no monster,
then switch rooms with me.
245
00:15:15,958 --> 00:15:18,210
- What?
- Switch rooms with me.
246
00:15:18,293 --> 00:15:21,922
Yeah, you sleep in Eric's room
and he sleeps in your room.
247
00:15:22,005 --> 00:15:24,383
- You just want my room.
- Nuh-uh.
248
00:15:24,466 --> 00:15:26,135
I want you to prove me wrong.
249
00:15:26,218 --> 00:15:28,887
- I dare you to switch rooms.
- Double dare.
250
00:15:28,971 --> 00:15:33,225
- Relax, toad.
- I double dare you to switch rooms.
251
00:15:33,308 --> 00:15:36,186
- Will you guys take a hike?
- [Eric] I'll pay you.
252
00:15:37,479 --> 00:15:39,231
Okay, toad.
253
00:15:39,314 --> 00:15:42,151
Brian, you gotta stay the whole night
254
00:15:42,234 --> 00:15:45,529
and you gotta sleep
with your legs sticking out of the covers.
255
00:15:45,612 --> 00:15:48,240
And you have to have the door closed.
256
00:15:48,323 --> 00:15:53,036
Oh, God, please, stop.
I can't take it, you're frightening me.
257
00:15:53,120 --> 00:15:54,329
Eric, Todd, it's time for bed.
258
00:15:56,999 --> 00:15:59,418
Hey, you guys,
don't touch anything in my room.
259
00:16:01,295 --> 00:16:03,422
- Good night, Dad.
- Good night, Mr. Stevenson.
260
00:16:03,505 --> 00:16:04,798
Good night.
261
00:16:06,383 --> 00:16:08,802
- Hey, Dad.
- Hey, Bri.
262
00:16:11,180 --> 00:16:14,391
You know, I think it's really nice of you
to switch rooms with Eric like this.
263
00:16:14,475 --> 00:16:16,226
- I'm proud of you.
- Thanks.
264
00:16:16,310 --> 00:16:17,561
Yeah.
265
00:16:17,644 --> 00:16:22,566
Personally, I think you guys are both
kinda nuts about this, uh, monster thing,
266
00:16:22,649 --> 00:16:25,277
- but if you happen to see him tonight...
- Yeah?
267
00:16:25,360 --> 00:16:27,946
...could you maybe get me
some autographs or--
268
00:16:28,030 --> 00:16:29,907
Okay, okay. Yes!
269
00:16:29,990 --> 00:16:32,242
Okay, I'll get your autographs!
Stop tickling!
270
00:16:32,326 --> 00:16:35,245
[Todd] So the girl's waiting
for her roommate to get back.
271
00:16:35,329 --> 00:16:37,456
She's getting real scared.
272
00:16:37,539 --> 00:16:41,251
Oh, yeah, her room's on the second floor.
273
00:16:41,335 --> 00:16:44,963
So she's waiting.
It's probably the darkest night ever.
274
00:16:45,047 --> 00:16:48,967
Suddenly, from outside
she hears, "Thump-thump.
275
00:16:49,051 --> 00:16:52,971
Thump-thump. ''
So sh e g et s real brave.
276
00:16:53,055 --> 00:16:54,932
She inches her way to the door.
277
00:16:55,015 --> 00:16:56,350
She hears it again.
278
00:16:56,433 --> 00:16:58,936
"Thump-thump. Thump-thump."
279
00:16:59,019 --> 00:17:01,230
So this girl is standing by the door
280
00:17:01,313 --> 00:17:04,316
and the "thump-thump"
is getting louder and louder.
281
00:17:05,692 --> 00:17:08,153
So she opens the door and screams.
282
00:17:08,237 --> 00:17:10,322
But she won't come out.
283
00:17:10,405 --> 00:17:13,116
She looks out, terrified as her roommate
comes up the stairs.
284
00:17:13,200 --> 00:17:15,619
Only the axeman cut off
all her arms and legs.
285
00:17:15,702 --> 00:17:18,288
She's dragging herself up by her chin.
286
00:17:18,372 --> 00:17:21,291
Thump-thump. Thump-thump.
Thump-thump.
287
00:17:22,376 --> 00:17:24,169
Phenomenally incredible, huh?
288
00:17:24,253 --> 00:17:27,339
It really happened?
289
00:17:27,422 --> 00:17:28,840
I'm deadly serious, man.
290
00:17:28,924 --> 00:17:30,551
My brother Freddie told me it happened
291
00:17:30,634 --> 00:17:33,845
to a friend of a friend of a distant
cousin of a cousin of ours.
292
00:17:33,929 --> 00:17:38,350
- [scoffs]
- [knocking in pattern]
293
00:17:38,433 --> 00:17:40,143
[knocking continues]
294
00:17:53,782 --> 00:17:55,784
??
295
00:18:11,466 --> 00:18:12,843
Darn.
296
00:18:23,395 --> 00:18:25,397
[TV playing quietly]
297
00:18:29,526 --> 00:18:33,864
[man] Please, oh, pl e as e, no!
298
00:18:33,947 --> 00:18:36,408
Someone please help!
299
00:18:38,118 --> 00:18:41,913
Pl e as e! Help me, please!
300
00:18:41,997 --> 00:18:44,082
Go away! Go away!
301
00:18:44,166 --> 00:18:46,168
[screaming]
302
00:18:53,216 --> 00:18:54,468
[object scrapes]
303
00:19:02,225 --> 00:19:03,644
[gulps]
304
00:19:08,148 --> 00:19:11,318
[whispers] Hey, Brian.
Hey, Brian, you okay?
305
00:19:11,401 --> 00:19:14,571
Looks like you got two weird phenomenons
in your house--
306
00:19:14,655 --> 00:19:17,574
a monster and a giant chicken.
307
00:19:17,658 --> 00:19:19,618
Double or nothing.
308
00:19:19,701 --> 00:19:22,245
??
309
00:19:42,224 --> 00:19:45,227
- [muffled] Can I be excused?
- Yes.
310
00:19:46,228 --> 00:19:48,230
??
311
00:20:07,916 --> 00:20:10,502
Eric wanted you to have this.
312
00:20:12,295 --> 00:20:13,588
Hi, Mom.
313
00:20:14,881 --> 00:20:15,882
Hi.
314
00:20:17,926 --> 00:20:20,512
Brian, are you all right?
315
00:20:20,595 --> 00:20:23,181
Fine, Mom. Never felt better.
316
00:20:23,265 --> 00:20:27,561
Oh, well, then what are you doing
in bed at 9:15 at night?
317
00:20:27,644 --> 00:20:29,187
School, Mom.
318
00:20:29,271 --> 00:20:32,524
It's a big day ahead of me. Big, big, day.
319
00:20:32,607 --> 00:20:36,278
Sounds nice, Brian.
Why don't I believe you?
320
00:20:36,361 --> 00:20:37,487
It's the new me.
321
00:20:39,197 --> 00:20:40,866
Okay.
322
00:20:40,949 --> 00:20:44,828
Well, I guess I'll see the brand-new,
all-new you in the morning.
323
00:20:49,541 --> 00:20:50,792
Mom?
324
00:20:54,254 --> 00:20:55,589
I love you.
325
00:20:56,757 --> 00:20:59,217
[light chuckle] I love you, too, honey.
326
00:21:00,260 --> 00:21:01,428
- Good night.
- Good night.
327
00:21:05,557 --> 00:21:07,559
??
328
00:22:03,406 --> 00:22:04,407
[ticking]
329
00:22:25,387 --> 00:22:27,055
[crunching]
330
00:22:39,734 --> 00:22:42,404
[monster burps, growls]
331
00:22:42,487 --> 00:22:44,489
[crunching continues]
332
00:23:06,928 --> 00:23:08,597
[ringing]
333
00:23:10,724 --> 00:23:11,558
Yeah!
334
00:23:12,559 --> 00:23:13,977
[panting]
335
00:23:17,647 --> 00:23:18,481
[panting]
336
00:23:37,584 --> 00:23:38,418
Ah!
337
00:23:38,501 --> 00:23:40,503
??
338
00:23:44,758 --> 00:23:47,427
Dad, a mons...
339
00:23:47,510 --> 00:23:49,721
ter.
340
00:23:53,391 --> 00:23:55,226
What are you doing, Brian?
341
00:23:55,310 --> 00:23:57,312
What the hell is going--
look at this mess.
342
00:23:57,395 --> 00:24:00,315
What the hell am I stepping in?
Doritos? Jesus.
343
00:24:00,398 --> 00:24:02,150
- I'll clean 'em up.
- You're damn right you will.
344
00:24:02,233 --> 00:24:03,401
Get back in that bed, mister.
345
00:24:04,402 --> 00:24:07,197
Dad, wait a minute.
There was a monster here.
346
00:24:07,280 --> 00:24:08,949
- You gotta believe me.
- A monster.
347
00:24:09,032 --> 00:24:12,285
Brian, it's a pile of clothes.
You're wrestling a pile of clothes.
348
00:24:12,369 --> 00:24:14,162
What's so funny?
349
00:24:14,245 --> 00:24:16,039
After you finish cleaning this room
tomorrow,
350
00:24:16,122 --> 00:24:18,083
- you're gonna clean out the garage.
- [doorknob rattles]
351
00:24:19,668 --> 00:24:21,294
And after the garage,
you're gonna cut the hedges.
352
00:24:21,378 --> 00:24:22,671
But it wasn't my fault.
353
00:24:22,754 --> 00:24:24,881
After the hedges,
you're gonna mow the lawn.
354
00:24:24,965 --> 00:24:26,216
- It wasn't my fault.
- Good night.
355
00:24:28,718 --> 00:24:30,720
??
356
00:25:03,920 --> 00:25:04,754
[growls]
357
00:25:09,968 --> 00:25:12,262
[grunts, growling]
358
00:25:20,478 --> 00:25:22,313
[growling stops]
359
00:25:29,195 --> 00:25:31,364
[sighs]
360
00:25:31,448 --> 00:25:32,323
[roars]
361
00:25:37,162 --> 00:25:38,329
[growling]
362
00:25:40,331 --> 00:25:41,875
[growling continues]
363
00:25:59,017 --> 00:26:00,602
Boo. [laughs]
364
00:26:00,685 --> 00:26:02,520
Keep an eye out for monsters! [laughs]
365
00:26:05,523 --> 00:26:06,691
Uh-uh. [laughs]
366
00:26:06,775 --> 00:26:09,444
- I'll scream.
- Scream? Good idea.
367
00:26:09,527 --> 00:26:12,280
You scream, your dad's gonna come in here
with a 12-gauge shotgun--
368
00:26:12,363 --> 00:26:13,865
pow-- blow your head off.
369
00:26:13,948 --> 00:26:16,242
Actually, I'll scream. [inhales]
370
00:26:16,326 --> 00:26:17,535
- Shut up!
- [coughs]
371
00:26:19,746 --> 00:26:20,747
Great. [dry heaves]
372
00:26:21,915 --> 00:26:25,001
Actually, your dad's gonna come in here
and find Dorito puke all over the floor.
373
00:26:25,085 --> 00:26:28,046
What's he gonna say, huh?
Wow, baseball cards!
374
00:26:28,129 --> 00:26:29,547
I love baseball cards.
375
00:26:29,631 --> 00:26:32,300
Got 'em, got 'em, need 'em,
got 'em, got 'em, got 'em, need 'em,
376
00:26:32,383 --> 00:26:35,095
got 'em, need 'em, need 'em, got 'em, need
'em, need 'em, got 'em, got 'em, need 'em.
377
00:26:37,013 --> 00:26:38,807
Oh, a football.
378
00:26:38,890 --> 00:26:40,809
He goes to the 25 yard line,
379
00:26:40,892 --> 00:26:43,269
the 50 yard line, the 40 yard line.
380
00:26:43,353 --> 00:26:45,146
Stevenson, go for the long bomb.
381
00:26:45,230 --> 00:26:47,065
Whoa.
382
00:26:47,148 --> 00:26:49,567
Light! The sun! The sun! The sun!
383
00:26:49,651 --> 00:26:51,611
Let me go, let me go,
let me go, let me go!
384
00:26:59,244 --> 00:27:01,287
[growls] Ow.
385
00:27:01,371 --> 00:27:03,665
Ooh, oh, ow.
386
00:27:03,748 --> 00:27:06,000
Ooh, whoa, ow.
387
00:27:06,084 --> 00:27:11,756
Ow, ow, ow, ow,
ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
388
00:27:11,840 --> 00:27:15,343
Ow. Ah.
389
00:27:16,970 --> 00:27:19,139
Okay. Horns. Great! [scoffs]
390
00:27:19,222 --> 00:27:22,183
Great, now nobody's gonna recognize me.
391
00:27:24,102 --> 00:27:25,687
I gotta get under the bed.
392
00:27:25,770 --> 00:27:27,856
- I gotta go under--
- No!
393
00:27:27,939 --> 00:27:29,941
[groaning]
394
00:27:30,024 --> 00:27:31,359
What's happening?
395
00:27:31,442 --> 00:27:33,319
I gotta get back. I gotta go.
396
00:27:33,403 --> 00:27:35,864
I gotta go. I gotta-- oh.
397
00:27:35,947 --> 00:27:37,115
What's going on?
398
00:27:38,116 --> 00:27:39,617
Bacon and eggs, kid.
399
00:27:39,701 --> 00:27:43,288
What do you want,
sunny side up or over easy, huh?
400
00:27:44,414 --> 00:27:45,915
You're dying.
401
00:27:45,999 --> 00:27:48,126
[groaning]
402
00:27:52,463 --> 00:27:53,882
It's the sunlight, isn't it?
403
00:27:58,136 --> 00:28:00,346
First it disfigures you,
then it kills you.
404
00:28:00,430 --> 00:28:04,642
Nah, you're mixing me up
with that pansy with the red cape.
405
00:28:06,394 --> 00:28:09,230
Please. Ow.
406
00:28:09,314 --> 00:28:11,733
I have to--
407
00:28:11,816 --> 00:28:15,195
I have to get under the bed before--
408
00:28:15,278 --> 00:28:18,531
before the sun totally rises.
409
00:28:18,615 --> 00:28:22,243
Uh-uh, no way. You wrecked my bike.
410
00:28:22,327 --> 00:28:24,621
You've been pulling stuff,
trying to get me in trouble.
411
00:28:25,622 --> 00:28:29,667
- Brian. Bri-- please.
- [sobbing]
412
00:28:51,356 --> 00:28:52,357
Damn.
413
00:28:53,816 --> 00:28:55,818
??
414
00:29:26,516 --> 00:29:31,312
[laughs] Hey, bud. The name's Maurice
and I'll catch ya later.
415
00:29:35,984 --> 00:29:40,405
[announcer] He finds Ainge.
DJ, straight away 20. No.
416
00:29:40,488 --> 00:29:42,323
Rebound New York.
417
00:29:42,407 --> 00:29:44,242
Michael Jack-- Mark Jackson.
418
00:29:44,325 --> 00:29:45,952
[changes channel]
419
00:29:46,035 --> 00:29:48,079
[announcer 2] Fastball inside to Schmidt--
420
00:29:48,162 --> 00:29:50,039
- [changes channel]
- [announcer] Back in a hurry. Oh, nice.
421
00:29:50,123 --> 00:29:53,126
This is ridiculous! I want my remote.
Where the hell is it?
422
00:29:54,210 --> 00:29:57,088
How am I supposed to watch TV
without the remote, huh?
423
00:29:57,171 --> 00:29:59,882
Have you, by any chance,
seen a piece of sandpaper
424
00:29:59,966 --> 00:30:02,260
or a paintbrush around here
the last few days?
425
00:30:02,343 --> 00:30:04,095
- Huh?
- [announcer] Now Reggie.
426
00:30:04,178 --> 00:30:05,847
Straight away foul line. No.
427
00:30:06,848 --> 00:30:08,850
[TV continues playing in background]
428
00:30:10,143 --> 00:30:12,270
Well, yeah, sure, there was one.
429
00:30:12,353 --> 00:30:14,105
But there are no more, right?
430
00:30:14,188 --> 00:30:16,607
Right. Your room is monster-free.
431
00:30:17,817 --> 00:30:19,861
So I'll be taking
my master suite back tonight.
432
00:30:21,863 --> 00:30:25,116
- [announcer] 16 to go.
- [announcer 3] He's tired. DJ is tired.
433
00:30:25,199 --> 00:30:27,785
Brian! Eric!
434
00:30:30,413 --> 00:30:33,916
Hey, Bri, Eric?
Have you guys seen the remote thing?
435
00:30:34,000 --> 00:30:36,586
I've got the Celtics, the Sox,
and the Masters are on.
436
00:30:36,669 --> 00:30:40,131
I can't-- I can't switch without the--
you know, the remote.
437
00:30:41,174 --> 00:30:43,051
I didn't take it, Dad!
438
00:30:43,134 --> 00:30:44,677
Well, then, where--
439
00:30:44,761 --> 00:30:46,679
God damn this house.
440
00:30:49,849 --> 00:30:51,100
[crickets chirping]
441
00:30:54,562 --> 00:30:56,564
??
442
00:31:07,158 --> 00:31:10,161
[Eric screams] Mom, a monster!
443
00:31:14,165 --> 00:31:17,251
Hey, why'd you change rooms
with that whiffle ball, huh?
444
00:31:17,335 --> 00:31:20,463
You know, he's gonna have
a heart attack by the time he's 10.
445
00:31:21,506 --> 00:31:22,507
Ow.
446
00:31:23,508 --> 00:31:26,219
- Ow...
- I get it!
447
00:31:26,302 --> 00:31:30,098
All right, so, like, when it gets darker,
your eyeballs get bigger,
448
00:31:30,181 --> 00:31:32,517
but then when the lights go on,
you turn into clothes.
449
00:31:32,600 --> 00:31:35,937
Oh, brilliant, Bri. Just brilliant.
450
00:31:36,020 --> 00:31:38,022
You must be in, what? At least grade two?
451
00:31:38,106 --> 00:31:41,025
- Six.
- [gasps] A worldly scholar.
452
00:31:41,109 --> 00:31:43,236
Super. I love it.
Now how about lighting a candle?
453
00:31:43,319 --> 00:31:45,780
- These lights are painful, man.
- No way.
454
00:31:45,863 --> 00:31:49,117
I have enough problems without you
running around getting me into more.
455
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:52,370
You got your stupid remote control back.
Now turn off the lights.
456
00:31:56,124 --> 00:31:59,544
- Hey, what about the batteries?
- I ate 'em for breakfast.
457
00:31:59,627 --> 00:32:03,005
I'd give 'em to you right now,
but AA batteries constipate me, okay?
458
00:32:03,089 --> 00:32:05,466
- Maybe a little later?
- That's gross.
459
00:32:05,550 --> 00:32:08,428
- Hey, and what about my bike?
- I'll get you a new bike.
460
00:32:08,511 --> 00:32:11,806
Just get me out of these clothes!
461
00:32:11,889 --> 00:32:13,933
- Shh!
- Honest, I'm burning up.
462
00:32:14,016 --> 00:32:17,061
My inseams are on fire!
463
00:32:17,145 --> 00:32:20,857
All right, but any funny moves
and you're clothes.
464
00:32:20,940 --> 00:32:21,774
[electricity zaps]
465
00:32:25,445 --> 00:32:26,654
[groans]
466
00:32:33,995 --> 00:32:35,997
Grazie, boy. Grazie.
467
00:32:36,080 --> 00:32:37,540
Oh, you're a pretty sharp kid.
468
00:32:37,623 --> 00:32:39,500
You're-- oh, you're ugly,
but you're sharp.
469
00:32:39,584 --> 00:32:40,501
[laughs]
470
00:32:41,502 --> 00:32:42,879
Wait, wait, wait. Let me get it.
Let me get it.
471
00:32:42,962 --> 00:32:44,213
[exclaims, chomps]
472
00:32:45,631 --> 00:32:47,800
[spits] You know, I thought
it was something good, but it's snot.
473
00:32:47,884 --> 00:32:49,302
[guffaws]
474
00:32:49,385 --> 00:32:53,055
I've been in this business now,
what, well over 200 years,
475
00:32:53,139 --> 00:32:55,099
and I've never been trapped once.
476
00:32:56,976 --> 00:32:59,312
- How old are you?
- Eleven.
477
00:32:59,395 --> 00:33:01,689
Wow, and I ain't gettin'
any prettier. [laughs]
478
00:33:02,690 --> 00:33:04,859
Hey, dude. Come here, bud.
479
00:33:04,942 --> 00:33:08,321
You don't know it yet,
but tonight it is your lucky night.
480
00:33:08,404 --> 00:33:10,364
- What do you mean?
- I mean--
481
00:33:10,448 --> 00:33:13,284
Oh, oh, I know. You're gonna grant me
three wishes, right?
482
00:33:13,367 --> 00:33:15,411
Wishes? [scoffs]
483
00:33:15,495 --> 00:33:20,291
Wishes? Wishes are bush-league
leprechaun, pal.
484
00:33:20,374 --> 00:33:22,960
I'm a monster, okay?
Okay, listen to this.
485
00:33:23,044 --> 00:33:26,422
I'm a monster,
and monsters don't do wishes.
486
00:33:26,506 --> 00:33:29,884
- Then what do monsters do?
- Good question.
487
00:33:29,967 --> 00:33:34,680
I have the time of my life.
488
00:33:37,141 --> 00:33:39,143
[Tarzan yell echoes]
489
00:33:41,395 --> 00:33:43,898
- Ta-da!
- How do you do that?
490
00:33:43,981 --> 00:33:45,650
It's magic, chump. It is.
491
00:33:45,733 --> 00:33:48,236
You just gotta be
handsome and gorgeous like me
492
00:33:48,319 --> 00:33:52,365
or have somebody handsome and gorgeous
like me show you how.
493
00:33:52,448 --> 00:33:54,992
[echoes] Brian Stevenson,
come on down.
494
00:33:55,076 --> 00:33:56,160
I can't.
495
00:33:57,245 --> 00:33:59,539
"Can't." Ooh, I hate that word.
496
00:33:59,622 --> 00:34:02,041
Ooh, ooh, that word's like caca to me.
497
00:34:02,124 --> 00:34:05,169
No, can't, can't.
You can't jam a basketball.
498
00:34:05,253 --> 00:34:08,005
You can't have a hand grenade go off
in your lap and survive.
499
00:34:08,089 --> 00:34:09,382
Those things you can't do.
500
00:34:09,465 --> 00:34:14,178
But you can take a walk on the wild side.
501
00:34:14,262 --> 00:34:16,597
Well, I mean, look.
I mean, even if I do go,
502
00:34:16,681 --> 00:34:18,474
how do I know I'm gonna
be able to come back?
503
00:34:18,558 --> 00:34:19,559
Listen to me.
504
00:34:19,642 --> 00:34:24,021
What goes on down there
is every kid's fantasy. [laughs]
505
00:34:25,773 --> 00:34:30,027
Imagine, if you will...
imagine a world solely of kids,
506
00:34:30,111 --> 00:34:32,655
kids that just wanna have fun.
507
00:34:32,738 --> 00:34:34,407
And make trouble.
508
00:34:34,490 --> 00:34:35,700
Trouble?
509
00:34:35,783 --> 00:34:38,369
Trouble is our code of honor.
510
00:34:38,452 --> 00:34:41,872
It's our blood, our life support system.
511
00:34:41,956 --> 00:34:45,376
It's our raison d'être. That's French.
512
00:34:45,459 --> 00:34:47,211
Do they all look like you?
513
00:34:47,295 --> 00:34:50,047
Only the good-looking ones. [laughs]
514
00:34:51,048 --> 00:34:54,385
Think of it, Bri. No teachers, no rules,
no homework.
515
00:34:55,386 --> 00:34:56,762
No parents. You hear me, boy?
516
00:34:56,846 --> 00:34:59,181
- I said-- I said no parents.
- No parents.
517
00:34:59,265 --> 00:35:01,267
Man, that alone is worth
all the money in the world.
518
00:35:01,350 --> 00:35:03,728
It's about leaving your clothes
wherever it is you wanna leave 'em.
519
00:35:03,811 --> 00:35:06,480
It's about never having
to clean up after you eat.
520
00:35:06,564 --> 00:35:09,108
It's about never worrying
about being on time. Whoa!
521
00:35:09,191 --> 00:35:13,029
It's about staying up late, watching
whatever it is you wanna watch on TV.
522
00:35:13,112 --> 00:35:14,280
You wanna watch Letterman?
523
00:35:14,363 --> 00:35:15,531
You wanna watch the Playboy Channel?
524
00:35:17,241 --> 00:35:20,328
It's about nailing somebody that bugs you
in a way that you never dreamed possible.
525
00:35:20,411 --> 00:35:22,455
What's that? [laughs]
526
00:35:22,538 --> 00:35:27,293
It's about total, 100%, unadulterated,
where's-the-beef anarchy!
527
00:35:28,544 --> 00:35:33,174
Brian, it's about freedom.
528
00:35:33,257 --> 00:35:37,011
Freedom to live life
529
00:35:37,094 --> 00:35:42,141
the way the creators
of this planet intended it.
530
00:35:42,224 --> 00:35:45,102
Man, that sounds great.
531
00:35:45,186 --> 00:35:47,146
What do you say, bud? You ready?
532
00:35:47,229 --> 00:35:50,107
Maurice, I was born ready.
533
00:35:51,942 --> 00:35:54,320
But first I'm gonna need some insurance.
534
00:35:54,403 --> 00:35:58,574
Whoa, there, thunder.
No, no, no candles, matches.
535
00:35:58,658 --> 00:36:01,661
Even something festive like this--
this would be nice.
536
00:36:01,744 --> 00:36:04,205
But absolutely nada-- no bright light.
537
00:36:04,288 --> 00:36:06,999
Okay, bud? Oh, all right,
all right, all right.
538
00:36:07,083 --> 00:36:09,126
If you wanna take it, I'm tellin' ya,
we gotta hide it.
539
00:36:09,210 --> 00:36:11,295
- Okay, sure.
- Okay? Sure. Come on.
540
00:36:14,548 --> 00:36:16,717
Maurice!
541
00:36:16,801 --> 00:36:18,594
[thuds]
542
00:36:18,678 --> 00:36:19,970
Whoosh.
543
00:36:26,352 --> 00:36:28,062
[laughs]
544
00:36:28,145 --> 00:36:30,064
Hey, bud.
545
00:36:30,147 --> 00:36:33,234
- Come on.
- Whoa. What is this place?
546
00:36:33,317 --> 00:36:36,362
I mean, I thought the dining room was
under Eric's room.
547
00:36:36,445 --> 00:36:39,156
Well, we're not
in Kansas anymore, bud. [laughs]
548
00:36:39,240 --> 00:36:41,575
Come on, take a look at this.
549
00:36:44,328 --> 00:36:47,707
Take a gander, Bri. Ain't it amazin'?
550
00:36:47,790 --> 00:36:49,083
[chatter]
551
00:36:50,668 --> 00:36:52,461
Wow.
552
00:36:53,796 --> 00:36:55,506
[laughing]
553
00:36:59,719 --> 00:37:02,263
Yo, Brian, move 'em out.
554
00:37:02,346 --> 00:37:05,808
We're burning nightlight, pard'.
Come on, come on, come on.
555
00:37:07,143 --> 00:37:10,312
- Oh.
- Hey, Maurice. Like the horns.
556
00:37:10,396 --> 00:37:11,313
Syd!
557
00:37:12,314 --> 00:37:14,442
I never forget a face.
558
00:37:14,525 --> 00:37:17,153
It's the other one I can't remember.
Get outta here, bud.
559
00:37:17,236 --> 00:37:18,696
Come on, Brian.
560
00:37:18,779 --> 00:37:21,532
- Did not. Did not. Did not.
- Did, too. Did, too. Did, too.
561
00:37:21,615 --> 00:37:24,493
Hey, Owl, Rigsbut, this is my new bud.
562
00:37:24,577 --> 00:37:26,662
- Hi, bud.
- Hi, the name's Brian.
563
00:37:26,746 --> 00:37:28,164
- Hi, Brian.
- Bud.
564
00:37:28,247 --> 00:37:29,999
- Brian. Brian. Brian.
- Bud. Bud. Bud.
565
00:37:30,082 --> 00:37:31,333
[argument continues]
566
00:37:31,417 --> 00:37:33,043
Wait a second.
567
00:37:33,127 --> 00:37:35,296
What are all these stairs and ladders for?
568
00:37:35,379 --> 00:37:36,922
Good question, bud.
569
00:37:37,006 --> 00:37:40,634
Every one of these staircases
leads to some poor soul's bedroom.
570
00:37:40,718 --> 00:37:43,179
It's like-- let me put this simply.
571
00:37:43,262 --> 00:37:46,766
It's a veritable cornucopia of mischief.
572
00:37:46,849 --> 00:37:49,643
- Hi, Maurice.
- Hey, come here. Come here.
573
00:37:49,727 --> 00:37:52,021
- What's that on your shirt?
- Where? Aw.
574
00:37:52,104 --> 00:37:54,440
Get outta here.
Let me show you around.
575
00:37:56,275 --> 00:37:58,235
Let me show you straight.
576
00:37:58,319 --> 00:37:59,779
Don't do it. "I have to do it!"
577
00:37:59,862 --> 00:38:02,490
Don't do it. "Nobody likes me!
Good-bye, cruel world!"
578
00:38:02,573 --> 00:38:04,200
- [laughs]
- [crashes]
579
00:38:05,201 --> 00:38:07,077
Gomer, Brian.
Brian, Gomer.
580
00:38:08,704 --> 00:38:11,165
Any friend of Maurice is a friend of mine.
581
00:38:12,374 --> 00:38:13,667
Eh.
582
00:38:16,545 --> 00:38:18,172
- You're gonna love this place.
- What?
583
00:38:18,255 --> 00:38:20,132
All right, the magic word.
584
00:38:20,216 --> 00:38:21,759
Oh, I forget the magic word.
585
00:38:21,842 --> 00:38:23,219
- It's, uh-- it's, uh...
- Think, think!
586
00:38:23,302 --> 00:38:25,095
[farts]
587
00:38:25,179 --> 00:38:28,766
- ["Let's Go" by The Paladins playing]
- That's it! Come on, bud!
588
00:38:28,849 --> 00:38:32,311
- Shoot, shoot, shoot!
- How you doing? Strike!
589
00:38:32,394 --> 00:38:35,105
Oh, rock 'n' roll!
590
00:38:35,189 --> 00:38:37,608
- Dance with me, babe.
- Sure.
591
00:38:37,691 --> 00:38:39,819
One, two, cha-cha-cha.
592
00:38:39,902 --> 00:38:43,072
- One, two.
- [game beeping, dinging]
593
00:38:45,157 --> 00:38:47,243
["Let's Go" continues]
594
00:38:52,331 --> 00:38:54,500
- Yeah.
- That's neat, Bri.
595
00:38:54,583 --> 00:38:57,670
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Free ball, free ball!
596
00:38:57,753 --> 00:39:00,214
Hey. Hey, what are you doing?
597
00:39:00,297 --> 00:39:03,175
- You're gonna tilt it!
- I know the place-- ow!
598
00:39:03,259 --> 00:39:04,718
[game dinging, beeping]
599
00:39:04,802 --> 00:39:06,595
Kiddo, baby, honey, bubby.
600
00:39:06,679 --> 00:39:08,764
Open your eyes. Don't ya know?
601
00:39:08,848 --> 00:39:12,226
Down here there's no such thing as tilt.
602
00:39:13,310 --> 00:39:15,062
[pinging, zapping]
603
00:39:15,145 --> 00:39:17,940
- [Maurice] Go. Win it, boss. Win it!
- [Brian] Come on, Maurice, go!
604
00:39:21,861 --> 00:39:24,655
This is my favorite place
on the whole planet.
605
00:39:24,738 --> 00:39:27,616
Every craving you've ever craved.
606
00:39:27,700 --> 00:39:30,536
Every flavor you've ever flaved.
607
00:39:30,619 --> 00:39:32,830
[laughs] And the best part is,
608
00:39:32,913 --> 00:39:36,250
you don't see any parents telling the kids
what they can't eat, do ya?
609
00:39:36,333 --> 00:39:37,501
No.
610
00:39:37,585 --> 00:39:39,211
- Do ya?
- No!
611
00:39:39,295 --> 00:39:40,713
[monster] Must get beef!
612
00:39:41,797 --> 00:39:42,965
[burps]
613
00:39:44,091 --> 00:39:46,510
'Za, I love 'za.
614
00:39:46,594 --> 00:39:47,803
Cake.
615
00:39:48,888 --> 00:39:50,431
For later.
616
00:39:50,514 --> 00:39:52,391
Laces tied together.
617
00:39:52,474 --> 00:39:53,726
Hey, somebody wants you over there.
618
00:39:53,809 --> 00:39:54,852
- What?
- Right there, yeah.
619
00:39:54,935 --> 00:39:56,687
- Whoa!
- [both laugh]
620
00:39:56,770 --> 00:39:58,772
- Hey, you hurt me.
- Hey, don't fight.
621
00:39:58,856 --> 00:40:00,524
- Did not.
- Did, too.
622
00:40:00,608 --> 00:40:02,401
Oh, look, somebody dropped a quarter.
623
00:40:02,484 --> 00:40:04,612
- Whose is it? Don't know.
- Don't know.
624
00:40:04,695 --> 00:40:06,322
- Hey, let me give you a hand with that.
- Oh, yeah, me, too.
625
00:40:06,405 --> 00:40:08,407
- Oh.
- Oh, uh-oh.
626
00:40:08,490 --> 00:40:10,659
- Hey, Maurice.
- Hey, Schmoog.
627
00:40:10,743 --> 00:40:13,454
- Who's the drip?
- Hey, ease off, bud.
628
00:40:13,537 --> 00:40:16,415
This young man, he saved me
from a fatal case of sunburn,
629
00:40:16,498 --> 00:40:19,251
so I decided to give him the grand tour.
630
00:40:19,335 --> 00:40:21,879
- [laughs]
- Oh, well...
631
00:40:21,962 --> 00:40:24,340
- you got a brat in Cleveland.
- A brat in Cleveland.
632
00:40:24,423 --> 00:40:26,634
- An imp in Atlanta.
- An imp in Atlanta.
633
00:40:26,717 --> 00:40:27,718
And a twerp in Boston.
634
00:40:27,801 --> 00:40:30,930
And a twerp in--
and a dweeb giving me all this.
635
00:40:31,013 --> 00:40:32,514
Raise hell tonight.
636
00:40:33,599 --> 00:40:36,352
And show him how it's done.
637
00:40:36,435 --> 00:40:38,854
- [laughing]
- I will.
638
00:40:38,938 --> 00:40:41,190
- Biting--
- Wait a second.
639
00:40:41,273 --> 00:40:43,609
You're not gonna tell me
there's an airport in this place, are you?
640
00:40:43,692 --> 00:40:46,445
[scoffs] Brian, come on.
641
00:40:46,528 --> 00:40:48,447
Does it look like these hunchbacks
can handle a plane?
642
00:40:49,448 --> 00:40:51,617
It's magic.
643
00:40:51,700 --> 00:40:53,202
- That was pretty neat, huh?
- Yeah.
644
00:40:53,285 --> 00:40:55,746
See, down here distance is like time.
645
00:40:55,829 --> 00:40:58,707
- Yeah?
- And time is like...
646
00:40:58,791 --> 00:41:01,460
it's like polyester with an Acrylon blend.
647
00:41:05,005 --> 00:41:07,800
- [pounds]
- Whoa, where are you, bud?
648
00:41:09,843 --> 00:41:11,345
Wait a second.
649
00:41:11,428 --> 00:41:13,389
This is somebody else's house.
650
00:41:13,472 --> 00:41:15,474
No. Duh.
651
00:41:15,557 --> 00:41:17,559
Where'd you park the squad car,
Dick Tracy?
652
00:41:17,643 --> 00:41:20,688
- Come on.
- [whispers] Hey, hey, look.
653
00:41:20,771 --> 00:41:24,942
Hey, chill out, babe, okay?
I mean, you're quick.
654
00:41:25,025 --> 00:41:30,239
That's good instinct, but it's a little...
primitive, huh?
655
00:41:33,575 --> 00:41:35,995
Whoa, not now, Harold.
656
00:41:37,955 --> 00:41:40,833
[laughs]
657
00:41:40,916 --> 00:41:42,668
Isn't he sweet?
658
00:41:42,751 --> 00:41:48,340
I bet you he's dreaming about puppies
and his favorite baseball player.
659
00:41:48,424 --> 00:41:50,342
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
660
00:41:50,426 --> 00:41:52,970
Well, not for long.
661
00:41:53,053 --> 00:41:54,930
- [yells]
- [screams]
662
00:41:55,014 --> 00:41:57,516
["I Wanna Yell" by Billie Hughes begins]
663
00:42:07,109 --> 00:42:08,444
[both laugh]
664
00:42:08,527 --> 00:42:10,362
- Yellow.
- Yellow.
665
00:42:10,446 --> 00:42:11,488
Yellow.
666
00:42:12,781 --> 00:42:15,034
- Blue, blue.
- Blue, blue.
667
00:42:15,117 --> 00:42:17,119
[laughs]
668
00:42:17,202 --> 00:42:19,371
- [scratches record]
- Ah...
669
00:42:19,455 --> 00:42:21,457
["I Wanna Yell" continues]
670
00:42:54,073 --> 00:42:55,866
Chocolata.
671
00:42:56,992 --> 00:42:58,744
- All right.
- Never above 3'6".
672
00:42:58,827 --> 00:43:01,497
Three foot six? Ooh.
673
00:43:01,580 --> 00:43:02,915
Always against white.
674
00:43:02,998 --> 00:43:04,750
- Looks good against white.
- Yeah.
675
00:43:08,378 --> 00:43:10,047
You know, Bri, we live in a world
676
00:43:10,130 --> 00:43:13,967
dedicated to wreaking hell
on an entire nation of kids.
677
00:43:14,051 --> 00:43:17,096
- Kids, hey, they're not that bad.
- Mm-hmm.
678
00:43:17,179 --> 00:43:19,848
We're the reason kids get locked
in their rooms.
679
00:43:19,932 --> 00:43:22,935
We're the reason brothers
hate their sisters.
680
00:43:23,018 --> 00:43:27,606
We're also the reason that parents send
their kids back to camp.
681
00:43:27,689 --> 00:43:29,775
- [Brian laughs]
- I love it!
682
00:43:29,858 --> 00:43:31,777
[laughs] I'm alive!
683
00:43:31,860 --> 00:43:34,905
Maurice, Maurice, is there any way I can
make, like, a special stop?
684
00:43:34,988 --> 00:43:36,573
I wanna check somebody out.
685
00:43:36,657 --> 00:43:38,867
Oh, you're too good.
686
00:43:38,951 --> 00:43:41,286
You're just too damn good!
687
00:43:41,370 --> 00:43:43,372
??
688
00:43:45,457 --> 00:43:48,043
[Maurice] Whoa, something stinks.
689
00:43:50,504 --> 00:43:55,717
Look at Ronnie Coleman,
with his little teddy bear and thumb.
690
00:43:55,801 --> 00:43:57,636
This is classic.
691
00:43:57,719 --> 00:43:59,555
- What's this? What's this?
- Oh, oh.
692
00:43:59,638 --> 00:44:01,557
- Ronnie's sandwich.
- Ronnie's sandwich.
693
00:44:01,640 --> 00:44:03,600
Yeah. All right.
694
00:44:03,684 --> 00:44:04,810
- What flavor-- what is it?
- What is it?
695
00:44:04,893 --> 00:44:06,812
[sniffs] Tuna fish.
696
00:44:06,895 --> 00:44:08,897
- Ooh, it stinks.
- Yes.
697
00:44:08,981 --> 00:44:10,149
Cat food.
698
00:44:11,483 --> 00:44:12,484
[whirring]
699
00:44:13,485 --> 00:44:14,653
[laughs]
700
00:44:14,736 --> 00:44:17,489
[snoring]
701
00:44:19,700 --> 00:44:21,243
- Perfect.
- And then--
702
00:44:21,326 --> 00:44:22,369
- Hoo-hoo.
- Wrap it nicely.
703
00:44:22,452 --> 00:44:26,999
And then you bake it
in the oven 350 degrees.
704
00:44:27,082 --> 00:44:29,960
- Okay. Okay, ready?
- All right, yeah.
705
00:44:30,043 --> 00:44:31,670
- Turn it face up.
- All right.
706
00:44:31,753 --> 00:44:33,297
They'll never notice.
707
00:44:34,548 --> 00:44:36,466
What, what, what?
708
00:44:36,550 --> 00:44:38,010
- Apple juice? So what?
- Hold it.
709
00:44:38,093 --> 00:44:39,428
Yeah, what?
710
00:44:40,846 --> 00:44:42,181
You're drinking it?
711
00:44:42,264 --> 00:44:44,433
Maurice, that's disgusting.
712
00:44:45,601 --> 00:44:46,852
[burps]
713
00:44:46,935 --> 00:44:48,854
- What is that all about?
- [burping]
714
00:44:53,609 --> 00:44:54,985
And good for you, too.
715
00:44:55,068 --> 00:44:57,029
- [laughs]
- What are you doing?
716
00:44:57,112 --> 00:44:59,281
- [urinating]
- All right, Maurice!
717
00:44:59,364 --> 00:45:00,324
That's great!
718
00:45:01,325 --> 00:45:04,203
All right, yes. Oh, yes.
719
00:45:04,286 --> 00:45:07,706
Oh, yes.
720
00:45:07,789 --> 00:45:10,542
Oh, boy, what'd you eat today, man.
721
00:45:10,626 --> 00:45:13,629
- Ronnie's gonna be pissed.
- No kidding.
722
00:45:13,712 --> 00:45:15,255
[laughing]
723
00:45:15,339 --> 00:45:17,799
[both laughing, vocalizing]
724
00:45:21,303 --> 00:45:23,805
Hiy-- ow.
725
00:45:23,889 --> 00:45:25,224
Yow!
726
00:45:25,307 --> 00:45:29,519
I feel like I have been
on vacation for a week.
727
00:45:29,603 --> 00:45:31,563
Cool, bud.
728
00:45:31,647 --> 00:45:33,857
No.
729
00:45:33,941 --> 00:45:35,901
My dad's getting up
in 10 minutes.
730
00:45:35,984 --> 00:45:39,947
Whoa, that means
the sun comes up in five.
731
00:45:42,658 --> 00:45:44,159
Okay, bud.
732
00:45:44,243 --> 00:45:49,998
I can't bear to see anybody
go up there without protection.
733
00:45:51,291 --> 00:45:55,087
Those UVs can be pretty dangerous,
if you know what I mean.
734
00:45:55,170 --> 00:45:56,880
- Thanks.
- Yeah.
735
00:45:56,964 --> 00:45:58,548
Visiting hours are over at dawn,
736
00:45:58,632 --> 00:46:01,260
so unless you want a new residence
or a set of horns,
737
00:46:01,343 --> 00:46:03,679
we'd better book, bud, okay?
738
00:46:03,762 --> 00:46:08,475
I suppose you're going to tell me
your sister did this.
739
00:46:08,558 --> 00:46:10,352
Uh-huh.
740
00:46:10,435 --> 00:46:14,189
I'm innocent! I'm innocent!
I'll take a lie-detector test!
741
00:46:14,273 --> 00:46:18,527
- [mother] If you didn't do it, who did?!
- I don't know!
742
00:46:18,610 --> 00:46:20,946
[father] Peter!
743
00:46:21,029 --> 00:46:23,156
[mother 2] It's because
I'm working, isn't it?
744
00:46:23,240 --> 00:46:26,243
[father 2] Son, doll hair
never grows back.
745
00:46:26,326 --> 00:46:29,997
[mother 3] What made you think
the cat needed a shave?
746
00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:32,457
[father 3] Do you want to go
to military school?
747
00:46:32,541 --> 00:46:35,794
[teacher] Good morning, Mr. Stevenson!
748
00:46:35,877 --> 00:46:38,714
["Magic of the Night"
by Billie Hughes begins]
749
00:46:38,797 --> 00:46:40,007
[bell rings]
750
00:46:47,848 --> 00:46:49,850
??
751
00:46:51,184 --> 00:46:54,021
- Move it.
- [thuds]
752
00:46:54,104 --> 00:46:56,106
??
753
00:47:01,445 --> 00:47:03,739
Hey, what's with the glasses,
Rip Van Winkle?
754
00:47:04,740 --> 00:47:05,907
I had a late night.
755
00:47:05,991 --> 00:47:08,827
I bet you were up real late
working on your science project.
756
00:47:08,910 --> 00:47:11,330
Actually, I never thought of it that way.
757
00:47:11,413 --> 00:47:13,415
Well, mine's all finished.
758
00:47:14,708 --> 00:47:16,918
- Great.
- Mm.
759
00:47:19,046 --> 00:47:21,048
["Magic of the Night" continues]
760
00:47:31,308 --> 00:47:33,685
[spits] Piss!
761
00:47:33,769 --> 00:47:36,772
Who put piss in my apple juice?
762
00:47:36,855 --> 00:47:38,023
- Yes!
- Gross!
763
00:47:38,106 --> 00:47:40,776
Yes! Yes! All right!
764
00:47:40,859 --> 00:47:44,237
- [spits]
- [boy] Ew, he spit piss on the principal!
765
00:47:45,405 --> 00:47:47,407
["Magic of the Night" continues]
766
00:48:24,736 --> 00:48:26,363
Maurice!
767
00:48:26,446 --> 00:48:29,116
[laughs] A natural.
768
00:48:29,199 --> 00:48:32,411
No-holds-barred, dyed-in-the-wool,
no-assembly-required natural.
769
00:48:32,494 --> 00:48:34,287
Wah!
770
00:48:34,371 --> 00:48:35,747
What?
771
00:48:35,831 --> 00:48:37,207
"What"? What do you think?
772
00:48:37,290 --> 00:48:40,335
Geez, I thought I was quick,
but you, you, you, Scooby Doo,
773
00:48:40,419 --> 00:48:43,171
you're already moving through
the shadows.
774
00:48:43,255 --> 00:48:44,965
- No, I'm not.
- No, you're not?
775
00:48:45,048 --> 00:48:46,216
- No.
- No.
776
00:48:46,299 --> 00:48:47,426
You pulled me through.
777
00:48:47,509 --> 00:48:50,846
Get out of town.
Fine, fine, fine.
778
00:48:50,929 --> 00:48:55,142
Don't believe me,
but I'm tellin' ya one thing, buddy boy.
779
00:48:55,225 --> 00:49:00,397
It was a lot easier pulling you through
tonight than it was last night.
780
00:49:00,480 --> 00:49:01,940
[giggling]
781
00:49:05,152 --> 00:49:07,446
- Oh. [laughing]
- Maurice, why'd you do that?
782
00:49:07,529 --> 00:49:09,865
[laughing continues]
783
00:49:09,948 --> 00:49:12,951
- Oh!
- Nice ass.
784
00:49:14,870 --> 00:49:16,288
I'm good in Twister, too. Wow.
785
00:49:16,371 --> 00:49:17,706
[laughing]
786
00:49:18,707 --> 00:49:21,418
Not even my mother sees me
in my boxer shorts.
787
00:49:21,501 --> 00:49:24,296
Well, do you ever see her in hers?
788
00:49:24,379 --> 00:49:28,383
Say, Bri, don't you have
any cheese in your life, bud?
789
00:49:28,467 --> 00:49:31,303
Cheese? What kind?
790
00:49:31,386 --> 00:49:34,014
- "Madem-oiselles."
- What?
791
00:49:34,097 --> 00:49:36,308
Squeeze, tomatoes,
792
00:49:36,391 --> 00:49:38,894
broads, chicks, girls.
793
00:49:38,977 --> 00:49:40,854
I said, girls.
794
00:49:40,937 --> 00:49:42,898
Don't you have anybody else
in your life besides your mother
795
00:49:42,981 --> 00:49:45,317
who wears an over-the-shoulder
boulder holder?
796
00:49:52,574 --> 00:49:54,242
[laughing]
797
00:49:54,326 --> 00:49:55,160
[barks]
798
00:49:57,078 --> 00:49:58,830
I think your babe just barked.
799
00:50:00,540 --> 00:50:03,960
So, uh, what's
this Kiersten dame like, huh?
800
00:50:04,044 --> 00:50:07,172
Personally, I'm a--
I'm a wart and mole kind of guy.
801
00:50:08,173 --> 00:50:09,382
Huh? Huh?
802
00:50:09,466 --> 00:50:11,009
Hey, I'm talkin' to you.
803
00:50:12,010 --> 00:50:16,389
Oh, well, she's pretty neat,
but she is a girl.
804
00:50:16,473 --> 00:50:18,975
You know, real smart,
always knows the answer,
805
00:50:19,059 --> 00:50:20,769
always raises her hand.
806
00:50:20,852 --> 00:50:23,146
- Always has her homework done?
- Exactly.
807
00:50:23,230 --> 00:50:25,357
[laughs] I amaze me.
808
00:50:25,440 --> 00:50:28,026
Okay, Gumby, showtime.
809
00:50:31,112 --> 00:50:34,491
I don't believe it. She likes me.
810
00:50:34,574 --> 00:50:36,284
I thought she hated me.
811
00:50:36,368 --> 00:50:40,330
Why would anybody hate you, Bri?
All you are is ugly.
812
00:50:40,413 --> 00:50:42,374
Hey, Brian, Brian, I want you to meet
a couple friends of mine.
813
00:50:42,457 --> 00:50:43,959
This is Barbie and this is Midge.
814
00:50:44,042 --> 00:50:46,461
These chicks are so close to my heart.
815
00:50:46,545 --> 00:50:49,297
No, it's just that ever since
we moved here,
816
00:50:49,381 --> 00:50:52,425
I haven't really been able
to make friends other than you,
817
00:50:52,509 --> 00:50:55,929
and I never thought anybody really cared,
least of all Kiersten.
818
00:50:56,012 --> 00:50:57,430
Oh, Brian.
819
00:50:57,514 --> 00:50:59,891
Every-- everybody cares.
820
00:50:59,975 --> 00:51:03,436
It's just that-- it's just that certain
people have a different way of showing it.
821
00:51:03,520 --> 00:51:06,439
Some people are more giving
than other people, right?
822
00:51:09,484 --> 00:51:11,152
There ya go, bud. Enjoy yourself.
823
00:51:11,236 --> 00:51:13,530
Thank you. Thank you very much.
I'll keep this.
824
00:51:14,698 --> 00:51:15,782
Hey, look at her flipbook.
825
00:51:15,865 --> 00:51:18,994
- [laughs]
- Isn't this neat? I can't believe it.
826
00:51:21,454 --> 00:51:23,290
[growling]
827
00:51:26,668 --> 00:51:28,211
You know, I thought of this.
I gave her this idea.
828
00:51:28,295 --> 00:51:31,464
[growling]
829
00:51:31,548 --> 00:51:33,383
[laughing]
830
00:51:36,219 --> 00:51:39,180
Man's best friend-- his right hand.
831
00:51:39,264 --> 00:51:41,891
[growling]
832
00:51:41,975 --> 00:51:44,227
Good boy. Good boy.
833
00:51:47,147 --> 00:51:49,608
[thunder crashing]
834
00:51:54,529 --> 00:51:56,197
[Glen] Fine, I won't stay here anymore.
835
00:51:56,281 --> 00:51:57,866
I'll just sleep in the office
and send you the check.
836
00:51:57,949 --> 00:51:59,743
I wouldn't notice the difference.
837
00:51:59,826 --> 00:52:01,244
That's all you want from me,
my paycheck.
838
00:52:01,328 --> 00:52:04,414
Well, that's not all I want from you.
That's all I get.
839
00:52:04,497 --> 00:52:07,626
- I don't know what you're talking about.
- Mr. "I've Got a Headache."
840
00:52:07,709 --> 00:52:10,170
We don't even need a door
because we're always fighting.
841
00:52:10,253 --> 00:52:11,755
[Glen] Fine, we won't fight anymore.
842
00:52:11,838 --> 00:52:14,966
[Holly] Take away the fighting, there's
nothing left of our marriage at all!
843
00:52:15,050 --> 00:52:16,635
[Glen] Keep your voice down.
844
00:52:16,718 --> 00:52:19,971
- Brian?
- [Holly] Now you care about the kids?
845
00:52:20,055 --> 00:52:21,806
[argument continues]
846
00:52:25,644 --> 00:52:29,439
Brian? Can I have a flashlight?
847
00:52:40,116 --> 00:52:42,160
[whimpering]
848
00:52:44,579 --> 00:52:47,290
- [monster] Oh, shit!
- [monster 2] It's Snik!
849
00:52:47,374 --> 00:52:51,044
- [all screaming]
- [monster 3] It's Snik! It's Snik!
850
00:52:51,127 --> 00:52:52,962
Run, run, run!
851
00:52:54,422 --> 00:52:57,092
Arn, Arn, Arn.
852
00:52:57,175 --> 00:52:59,552
Arn.
853
00:52:59,636 --> 00:53:02,555
You know, Boy gets what he wants.
854
00:53:02,639 --> 00:53:06,518
When he asks you for a favor,
you should take that as a compliment.
855
00:53:06,601 --> 00:53:10,188
But I tried. You've gotta
believe me, Snik. I tried.
856
00:53:10,271 --> 00:53:14,025
Oh, you tried, did you, Arnold?
857
00:53:14,109 --> 00:53:15,694
Well, you didn't try hard enough!
858
00:53:15,777 --> 00:53:18,697
- My knees, they hurt!
- Oh, your knees hurt?
859
00:53:18,780 --> 00:53:21,366
That's not all that's gonna hurt, Arnold.
You know why?
860
00:53:21,449 --> 00:53:25,203
'Cause I'm gonna take
my big thumb and jam it in your eye!
861
00:53:25,286 --> 00:53:27,205
Now I'm gonna take my finger
and put it in the corner of your mouth,
862
00:53:27,288 --> 00:53:29,165
and I'm gonna rip
the corner of your mouth out.
863
00:53:29,249 --> 00:53:32,585
[laughs] That's good
for a laugh, isn't it? Huh?
864
00:53:33,670 --> 00:53:35,380
You're scared of me, aren't you, Arnold?
865
00:53:35,463 --> 00:53:38,299
Oh, I like that. [chomping]
866
00:53:38,383 --> 00:53:41,052
[growls]
867
00:53:41,136 --> 00:53:44,472
I love that.
868
00:53:44,556 --> 00:53:47,267
But do you know what I like even more
than that, Arnold?
869
00:53:47,350 --> 00:53:53,189
I like taking my two big, black
leather-gloved hands
870
00:53:53,273 --> 00:53:56,651
and grabbing your head and tearing it off!
871
00:53:56,735 --> 00:53:58,611
[yells, laughs]
872
00:54:00,655 --> 00:54:04,200
Hey, hey! Boy gets what he wants!
873
00:54:09,622 --> 00:54:13,126
Hey, remember, Boy always
gets what he wants!
874
00:54:13,209 --> 00:54:16,713
Never, ever, ever forget that!
875
00:54:16,796 --> 00:54:19,174
Ever! [laughs]
876
00:54:20,175 --> 00:54:22,260
[Brian] Well, you didn't have
to mess up her room.
877
00:54:22,343 --> 00:54:25,430
[scoffs] Bud, there's one rule.
878
00:54:25,513 --> 00:54:29,476
It's you never, ever,
ever, ever, ever, ever
879
00:54:29,559 --> 00:54:33,396
get emotionally involved
with the victim, ever.
880
00:54:33,480 --> 00:54:36,065
Maurice, she was starting to like me.
881
00:54:36,149 --> 00:54:37,650
[sighs]
882
00:54:37,734 --> 00:54:39,778
I can't wait to see her tomorrow.
883
00:54:39,861 --> 00:54:41,654
- [baseball bat cracks]
- [glass shatters]
884
00:54:41,738 --> 00:54:43,615
[crowd cheering]
885
00:54:43,698 --> 00:54:45,366
Let me show you this, bud.
You're gonna love this.
886
00:54:45,450 --> 00:54:46,451
- Yeah.
- This is great.
887
00:54:47,619 --> 00:54:49,662
- [laughing]
- [laughs] Look, look.
888
00:54:49,746 --> 00:54:51,247
[cheering continues]
889
00:54:56,336 --> 00:54:57,629
How do you play this?
890
00:54:57,712 --> 00:54:59,547
- Whoa!
- [crowd cheering]
891
00:55:01,800 --> 00:55:04,719
Come here. It's simple.
Let me show you, bud.
892
00:55:04,803 --> 00:55:07,305
- All right, we get the shit...
- Uh-huh.
893
00:55:07,388 --> 00:55:09,349
- ...we smash the shit...
- Yes.
894
00:55:09,432 --> 00:55:11,684
...and then we put the shit back.
It's called monsterball.
895
00:55:11,768 --> 00:55:14,145
We do the bashin', you get the thrashin'.
896
00:55:14,229 --> 00:55:16,481
Let's play ball. Come on, bud.
897
00:55:16,564 --> 00:55:20,151
["(I Love the Sound of) Breaking Glass"
by Berton Averre plays]
898
00:55:56,187 --> 00:55:58,606
- [monster] Oh, my God!
- [monster 2] My God!
899
00:56:46,237 --> 00:56:49,407
- Rawr!
- [yells]
900
00:56:49,490 --> 00:56:51,576
- [roaring]
- No, no, please!
901
00:56:51,659 --> 00:56:53,244
Hang on!
902
00:56:57,665 --> 00:56:58,833
He's a new kid. He's with me.
903
00:56:58,917 --> 00:57:01,502
- He's with me, Snik.
- Maurice.
904
00:57:01,586 --> 00:57:06,174
No one should ever, ever, ever
come this close to Boy's stairway.
905
00:57:06,257 --> 00:57:10,845
Right. Never, ever, ever
come this close to Boy's stairway.
906
00:57:10,929 --> 00:57:12,889
- [fly buzzing]
- Hey, kid, you want a fresh fly?
907
00:57:12,972 --> 00:57:13,973
No, no!
908
00:57:15,433 --> 00:57:16,851
Okay.
909
00:57:16,935 --> 00:57:19,854
I could break his neck, Maurice. I could.
910
00:57:19,938 --> 00:57:22,607
- Let's drop him. [laughs]
- No! He's just kidding.
911
00:57:22,690 --> 00:57:24,442
Snik, think of this.
912
00:57:24,525 --> 00:57:26,611
Dead people have limited potential,
913
00:57:26,694 --> 00:57:29,697
and I don't think that Boy
would like damaged goods.
914
00:57:29,781 --> 00:57:31,616
But it's your responsibility and--
915
00:57:31,699 --> 00:57:34,953
No, no, he's your responsibility,
Maurice.
916
00:57:35,036 --> 00:57:39,540
- Right. My respons--
- When you screw up, I drop you!
917
00:57:39,624 --> 00:57:42,627
That's fair. Let's go, bud.
918
00:57:42,710 --> 00:57:46,631
Oh, my back. [groans]
919
00:57:55,473 --> 00:57:58,309
Go on, run. Go, go, go, go.
920
00:57:58,393 --> 00:58:00,812
Go, go, go. [sighs]
921
00:58:00,895 --> 00:58:02,981
Damn it, Maurice, who was that?
922
00:58:03,064 --> 00:58:04,732
- Who, Snik?
- Yeah.
923
00:58:04,816 --> 00:58:07,777
Ah, all talk. Just a big mouth.
924
00:58:07,860 --> 00:58:10,947
And ever since he developed that hump,
he's been such a bitch.
925
00:58:11,030 --> 00:58:14,450
But you learn to stay away from Snik
and this staircase.
926
00:58:14,534 --> 00:58:16,327
- Okay, bud?
- No kidding.
927
00:58:16,411 --> 00:58:19,372
Let's move it.
You're such a doll. [laughs]
928
00:58:19,455 --> 00:58:21,332
Come on.
929
00:58:21,416 --> 00:58:23,001
[Eric] But he wasn't there.
930
00:58:23,084 --> 00:58:25,837
- [Todd] Was the window open?
- I don't know, I didn't check.
931
00:58:25,920 --> 00:58:28,798
Hmm. Maybe he went outside.
932
00:58:28,881 --> 00:58:32,844
Maybe he stepped outside
to smoke a cigarette. I bet that's it.
933
00:58:32,927 --> 00:58:35,388
- At 4:00 in the morning?
- Hmm.
934
00:58:35,471 --> 00:58:38,808
...with the ashes and how they preserved
the city of Pompeii--
935
00:58:38,891 --> 00:58:40,643
- [boy] Was that visible?
- Yes, it was very--
936
00:58:40,727 --> 00:58:43,396
you brought that up. Great.
And I think that--
937
00:58:43,479 --> 00:58:46,899
Well, Mr. Stevenson,
thank you for joining us.
938
00:58:46,983 --> 00:58:48,776
Please come in.
939
00:58:48,860 --> 00:58:51,320
You're just in time
for Kiersten's presentation.
940
00:58:52,321 --> 00:58:53,364
Kiersten, are you ready?
941
00:58:53,448 --> 00:58:56,534
- Yes, I am, Mr. Finn.
- Oh, look at this.
942
00:58:56,617 --> 00:58:58,995
- [kids] Wow.
- Wonderful.
943
00:58:59,078 --> 00:59:00,621
Thank you.
944
00:59:00,705 --> 00:59:02,498
- Do you have your research report?
- Yes.
945
00:59:02,582 --> 00:59:04,042
[Finn] Okay.
946
00:59:05,626 --> 00:59:07,587
[students murmuring]
947
00:59:08,588 --> 00:59:10,757
I-- I thought I did.
948
00:59:10,840 --> 00:59:12,341
Maurice.
949
00:59:12,425 --> 00:59:14,844
I guess my dog chewed it up.
950
00:59:14,927 --> 00:59:18,890
- Oh, right, you don't even have a dog.
- [kids laughing]
951
00:59:18,973 --> 00:59:21,601
- [Finn] All right, that's enough.
- [Kiersten] It's not funny.
952
00:59:29,901 --> 00:59:31,069
[shatters]
953
00:59:31,152 --> 00:59:35,406
Oh, hey, Brian! Nothing to worry about.
Only a drill.
954
00:59:37,992 --> 00:59:40,369
Hey, pard', what's with the light?
Something personal?
955
00:59:40,453 --> 00:59:42,080
- Yeah, you.
- Me?
956
00:59:42,163 --> 00:59:44,082
Your only friend in the whole world?
957
00:59:44,165 --> 00:59:47,168
[yells] Whoa! Window pain!
958
00:59:48,795 --> 00:59:51,005
My used-to-be only friend
in the whole wide world.
959
00:59:51,089 --> 00:59:52,673
You messed up Kiersten's homework.
960
00:59:52,757 --> 00:59:55,009
What? What did I do to the homework?
961
00:59:55,093 --> 00:59:57,512
You chewed it up. You destroyed it.
962
00:59:57,595 --> 00:59:59,097
You know she got a zero because of you?
963
01:00:01,140 --> 01:00:03,601
Brian, I was hungry, okay?
964
01:00:03,684 --> 01:00:05,144
And it just so--
965
01:00:05,228 --> 01:00:07,522
it just so happened
at that moment I had a craving
966
01:00:07,605 --> 01:00:10,858
for a six-page paper on the daytime
blooming of a nighttime cactus.
967
01:00:10,942 --> 01:00:14,028
And I'll tell you something else.
I got incredible heartburn from that.
968
01:00:14,112 --> 01:00:15,822
I can't believe you did that.
969
01:00:15,905 --> 01:00:18,116
I asked you not to and you just went ahead
and did it anyway.
970
01:00:18,199 --> 01:00:20,701
Brian, I happened to have a--
971
01:00:21,786 --> 01:00:22,995
[gasps]
972
01:00:24,789 --> 01:00:26,707
You like her, don't you?
973
01:00:26,791 --> 01:00:29,877
- No, I don't.
- Mm, yes, you do.
974
01:00:29,961 --> 01:00:31,963
- No, I don't.
- Yes, you do.
975
01:00:32,046 --> 01:00:34,048
- No, I don't.
- ? Brian's got a girlfriend ?
976
01:00:34,132 --> 01:00:35,550
? Brian's got a girlfriend ?
977
01:00:35,633 --> 01:00:37,218
- No, I don't!
- ? Brian's got a girlfriend ?
978
01:00:37,301 --> 01:00:39,720
? Brian's got a girlfriend. ?
Yes, you do.
979
01:00:39,804 --> 01:00:42,890
Would it help the boo-boo
if I said I was sorry, huh?
980
01:00:42,974 --> 01:00:44,851
Here, look, just go back
to your dumb underworld
981
01:00:44,934 --> 01:00:46,978
and leave me and Eric alone.
982
01:01:00,783 --> 01:01:03,661
Dad, what is it?
983
01:01:03,744 --> 01:01:05,746
Hey, Brian, come downstairs with me.
984
01:01:05,830 --> 01:01:08,499
Your mom and I want to talk to you
and Eric for a minute.
985
01:01:18,843 --> 01:01:21,846
- You want a ride?
- Sure, Daddy.
986
01:01:30,813 --> 01:01:35,109
We wanted to talk
to the both of you because, well...
987
01:01:35,193 --> 01:01:39,947
your mother and I have come to a decision
and it affects all of us.
988
01:01:40,031 --> 01:01:42,950
We figure you're grown-up enough
to understand.
989
01:01:43,034 --> 01:01:46,996
Mom and I have decided that we're not
gonna live together for a while.
990
01:01:47,079 --> 01:01:50,124
- [scoffs]
- A business trip?
991
01:01:50,208 --> 01:01:52,168
No, honey, not exactly.
992
01:01:52,251 --> 01:01:55,588
Eric, don't you get it?
They're getting a divorce.
993
01:01:57,798 --> 01:02:01,302
No, Brian, we are not getting a divorce.
994
01:02:01,385 --> 01:02:03,638
Yeah, right.
995
01:02:03,721 --> 01:02:08,267
It's just that your father and I
need to work some things out
996
01:02:08,351 --> 01:02:09,977
and we feel it would be better--
997
01:02:10,061 --> 01:02:13,940
Look, it's just, like--
it's a trial separation.
998
01:02:14,023 --> 01:02:16,317
Oh, God, sorry. That's what you do
before you get a divorce.
999
01:02:16,400 --> 01:02:18,611
- Brian, we're not getting a divorce.
- [scoffs]
1000
01:02:18,694 --> 01:02:20,321
- So Dad's not leaving?
- Eric...
1001
01:02:20,404 --> 01:02:22,657
- Good.
- ...listen to me.
1002
01:02:22,740 --> 01:02:25,660
I have to live in the city for a while.
Hopefully it won't be for long.
1003
01:02:25,743 --> 01:02:29,038
- No, you don't have to go.
- Yes, I do.
1004
01:02:31,207 --> 01:02:33,209
Yes, I do.
1005
01:02:33,292 --> 01:02:35,169
But, look, we'll get to talk every day.
1006
01:02:35,253 --> 01:02:38,673
I'll be good, I promise. I'll be better.
1007
01:02:38,756 --> 01:02:40,258
You won't have to go live in the city.
1008
01:02:40,341 --> 01:02:42,677
I swear to God I'll be better.
1009
01:02:42,760 --> 01:02:44,971
Brian, too. He promises, right?
1010
01:02:46,889 --> 01:02:50,184
Eric, it's not your fault.
1011
01:02:50,268 --> 01:02:52,645
And it's not Brian's fault.
1012
01:02:52,728 --> 01:02:54,814
It isn't anybody's fault.
1013
01:02:54,897 --> 01:02:56,899
It isn't anybody's fault.
1014
01:02:57,984 --> 01:02:59,277
[exhales]
1015
01:03:02,947 --> 01:03:06,617
- Bri, you all right?
- Oh, yeah, Dad. I'm just fine.
1016
01:03:08,995 --> 01:03:10,997
??
1017
01:04:03,507 --> 01:04:06,052
I heard it all.
1018
01:04:06,135 --> 01:04:08,054
Sucks, huh?
1019
01:04:10,431 --> 01:04:13,309
Yep. It's not too good.
1020
01:04:16,395 --> 01:04:18,689
- I hate them.
- No, you don't.
1021
01:04:18,773 --> 01:04:22,401
No, you don't.
At least you have a family.
1022
01:04:28,866 --> 01:04:33,454
Believe it or not,
you're the only real friend I have.
1023
01:04:35,790 --> 01:04:39,001
Why do you think I keep coming back?
If I didn't like you,
1024
01:04:39,085 --> 01:04:42,004
I'd have your parents blaming you
for the shooting of Abe Lincoln.
1025
01:04:44,548 --> 01:04:46,717
Come on down, it'll cheer you up.
Come on.
1026
01:04:47,885 --> 01:04:50,262
I don't really feel like being cheery.
1027
01:04:50,346 --> 01:04:55,309
Oh, Bri, baby. Pranks, snacks, games.
1028
01:04:58,062 --> 01:05:01,107
It'll take away the hurt. Come on.
1029
01:05:01,190 --> 01:05:03,192
You know what we could do?
We could go see Kiersten.
1030
01:05:04,193 --> 01:05:06,320
We'll bring her flowers.
1031
01:05:06,404 --> 01:05:07,905
Ooh, I've got a great idea.
1032
01:05:07,988 --> 01:05:10,866
We'll go to Ronnie Coleman's and we'll
loosen all the bolts on his furniture.
1033
01:05:10,950 --> 01:05:12,910
What do you say, huh?
1034
01:05:12,993 --> 01:05:14,829
It'll be quick. It's good for your bones.
1035
01:05:14,912 --> 01:05:16,872
Cross my heart and hope to die.
Come on.
1036
01:05:17,998 --> 01:05:20,000
Huh? Huh? Huh?
1037
01:05:20,084 --> 01:05:21,961
- Okay.
- All right!
1038
01:05:22,044 --> 01:05:24,338
Whoo! Come on.
1039
01:05:24,422 --> 01:05:25,840
[both vocalize]
1040
01:05:25,923 --> 01:05:28,092
- All right!
- [both groan]
1041
01:05:30,261 --> 01:05:31,512
Alley-oop.
1042
01:05:32,680 --> 01:05:34,682
??
1043
01:05:35,975 --> 01:05:38,185
- Uh, you all right, bud?
- Yeah, I'm fine.
1044
01:05:38,269 --> 01:05:39,520
Hey, where's the party?
1045
01:05:39,603 --> 01:05:42,398
- Night-light out at the Grossbergs'.
- Oh.
1046
01:05:42,481 --> 01:05:44,900
Coming through. New guy.
1047
01:05:44,984 --> 01:05:48,446
Coming-- excuse me.
Move over. Come on, bud.
1048
01:05:48,529 --> 01:05:50,281
Is the line with the tickets?
1049
01:05:50,364 --> 01:05:53,534
[laughs] Come on, bud.
Whoo, new guy.
1050
01:05:53,617 --> 01:05:55,995
["Little Bitty Pretty One"
by Bobby Day plays]
1051
01:06:00,499 --> 01:06:01,792
Hey, bud.
1052
01:06:05,296 --> 01:06:08,007
We're here. [laughs]
1053
01:06:08,090 --> 01:06:09,884
Bri, I'd like you to meet
some of my friends.
1054
01:06:09,967 --> 01:06:14,305
This is Sherry, Debbie, Pumpkin, Bernie.
1055
01:06:14,388 --> 01:06:16,182
This is great. Well, let's do it, man.
1056
01:06:16,265 --> 01:06:18,809
This is fun. Scare the hell
out of her, Bri.
1057
01:06:18,893 --> 01:06:20,936
Go ahead, Tonto.
Make her poop her Pampers.
1058
01:06:21,020 --> 01:06:24,064
Make her doodie her diapers.
Make her caca her crib.
1059
01:06:24,148 --> 01:06:26,400
Watch this, he's great.
Go ahead, bud.
1060
01:06:26,484 --> 01:06:29,278
Maurice, it's just a little baby.
1061
01:06:29,361 --> 01:06:33,073
Baby, baby, baby. It's our duty, man.
This is a character builder.
1062
01:06:33,157 --> 01:06:34,950
Come on, Tonto.
Scare the hell out of her.
1063
01:06:35,034 --> 01:06:37,286
[chuckles] Watch this, guys. Watch this.
1064
01:06:37,369 --> 01:06:39,079
Go ahead. Go.
1065
01:06:39,163 --> 01:06:41,081
Scare the hell out of her.
1066
01:06:41,165 --> 01:06:42,917
- Boo.
- "Boo"?
1067
01:06:43,000 --> 01:06:45,920
- Boo.
- "Boo"? What are you, the boo fairy?
1068
01:06:46,003 --> 01:06:48,422
[laughing]
1069
01:06:48,506 --> 01:06:50,841
[whimpering]
1070
01:06:50,925 --> 01:06:53,928
- Stop it.
- [growling]
1071
01:06:54,011 --> 01:06:55,387
Come on, stop it!
1072
01:06:55,471 --> 01:06:58,265
Oh, Brian, relax, okay?
1073
01:06:58,349 --> 01:07:01,060
Maurice, this is cruel.
1074
01:07:01,143 --> 01:07:02,978
[scoffs]
1075
01:07:03,062 --> 01:07:04,563
- [baby crying]
- [monsters laughing]
1076
01:07:04,647 --> 01:07:07,316
- [monster] Baby.
- [laughing continues]
1077
01:07:12,029 --> 01:07:13,989
- [monster] Light!
- Brian!
1078
01:07:31,215 --> 01:07:33,133
[groans]
1079
01:07:34,969 --> 01:07:37,221
Whoa! [thuds]
1080
01:07:37,304 --> 01:07:40,140
Todd, are you okay?
What happened?
1081
01:07:42,142 --> 01:07:42,977
Brian!
1082
01:07:47,940 --> 01:07:49,942
??
1083
01:08:05,666 --> 01:08:07,668
I'm shrinking.
1084
01:08:12,715 --> 01:08:14,967
Something's wrong.
1085
01:08:29,398 --> 01:08:32,026
So, um, how are the kids taking it?
1086
01:08:32,109 --> 01:08:34,361
Oh, they're fine. Eric went to school.
1087
01:08:34,445 --> 01:08:36,196
Brian stayed home. He's upstairs...
1088
01:08:38,032 --> 01:08:40,326
sawing the legs off all the beds.
1089
01:08:40,409 --> 01:08:42,536
[thuds]
1090
01:08:42,620 --> 01:08:47,666
Okay, so, I guess each kid
just has his own way of dealing with it.
1091
01:08:49,543 --> 01:08:51,837
Beats being an axe murderer in 10 years.
1092
01:08:54,048 --> 01:08:55,966
[woman laughs] Yeah.
1093
01:08:58,010 --> 01:09:01,138
- [Snik groaning]
- Just give me a second. I can-- I'll--
1094
01:09:01,221 --> 01:09:04,016
We almost had him.
1095
01:09:04,099 --> 01:09:05,476
He was becoming one of us!
1096
01:09:05,559 --> 01:09:07,603
[groaning]
1097
01:09:07,686 --> 01:09:09,480
He knows our secrets, Maurice.
1098
01:09:09,563 --> 01:09:11,231
He's harmless. I'll tell ya--
1099
01:09:11,315 --> 01:09:14,068
You know what? Let's leave him alone.
We'll just leave him alone and--
1100
01:09:14,151 --> 01:09:15,402
You just don't get it, Maurice.
1101
01:09:15,486 --> 01:09:20,157
Sometimes Boy gets a little lonely.
He wanted to play with him.
1102
01:09:20,240 --> 01:09:22,159
Why doesn't he just play with himself?
1103
01:09:22,242 --> 01:09:24,620
[laughs] "Why doesn't Boy
play with himself"?
1104
01:09:24,703 --> 01:09:27,081
Yeah. [laughs]
1105
01:09:27,164 --> 01:09:29,124
- Come here.
- No, don't get me upset, Snik.
1106
01:09:29,208 --> 01:09:31,043
You know what happens when I get upset.
1107
01:09:31,126 --> 01:09:33,045
You know what happens
when I get upset.
1108
01:09:33,128 --> 01:09:34,588
That's it, I'm upset.
1109
01:09:34,672 --> 01:09:37,091
[squeaks, hisses]
1110
01:09:39,426 --> 01:09:40,469
What the hell is that?
1111
01:09:40,552 --> 01:09:42,429
I don't know. That's what happens
when I get upset.
1112
01:09:42,513 --> 01:09:44,640
[yells]
1113
01:09:44,723 --> 01:09:47,434
[choking]
1114
01:09:47,518 --> 01:09:49,436
- You know something?
- What? No.
1115
01:09:49,520 --> 01:09:53,273
I don't like you, Maurice.
You're always trying to be so funny.
1116
01:09:53,357 --> 01:09:55,442
- Well, I got a little riddle for you.
- Okay.
1117
01:09:55,526 --> 01:10:00,114
What happens when Boy
doesn't get what he wants?
1118
01:10:00,197 --> 01:10:02,449
I don't know. I have a hunch.
1119
01:10:02,533 --> 01:10:04,284
- [coughs]
- Hunch?
1120
01:10:04,368 --> 01:10:06,245
Is that my hunch
you're talking about, Maurice?
1121
01:10:06,328 --> 01:10:08,038
Oh, no, no, no. I take it back.
1122
01:10:08,122 --> 01:10:10,416
- Back? Hunchback?!
- No!
1123
01:10:10,499 --> 01:10:13,293
You bring a kid in here,
you tell him our secrets?
1124
01:10:13,377 --> 01:10:15,337
- [cracks]
- [Maurice] My horn!
1125
01:10:15,421 --> 01:10:17,339
If you can't get him, I will.
1126
01:10:39,278 --> 01:10:40,404
[Snik growling]
1127
01:10:48,829 --> 01:10:50,789
[Snick laughs]
1128
01:10:52,374 --> 01:10:54,668
[Eric] Mom!
1129
01:10:54,752 --> 01:10:56,754
??
1130
01:11:01,592 --> 01:11:04,386
Brian. Wake up, wake up.
1131
01:11:04,470 --> 01:11:06,680
Eric's gone. Have you seen him?
Do you know where he went?
1132
01:11:06,764 --> 01:11:08,682
Gone? He's gone?
1133
01:11:08,766 --> 01:11:11,143
Look, Brian, if you know anything,
tell me right now.
1134
01:11:11,226 --> 01:11:13,145
- He's not in his room?
- No.
1135
01:11:13,228 --> 01:11:14,813
Do you think he went to see Daddy?
1136
01:11:14,897 --> 01:11:16,565
- He wouldn't do that, would he?
- No.
1137
01:11:17,941 --> 01:11:19,276
Todd's house. Maybe he's there.
1138
01:11:23,113 --> 01:11:25,115
??
1139
01:11:53,977 --> 01:11:56,855
Come on, toad, be awake.
1140
01:12:00,317 --> 01:12:01,485
All right.
1141
01:12:01,568 --> 01:12:03,403
Go away!
1142
01:12:03,487 --> 01:12:07,407
Toad, come on! I need you and every spare
flashlight you have in the house now!
1143
01:12:07,491 --> 01:12:10,244
Leave me alone, Brian.
You're one of them.
1144
01:12:10,327 --> 01:12:13,580
Todd, listen to me.
They have Eric!
1145
01:12:18,293 --> 01:12:21,755
- Who has Eric?
- The monsters. They kidnapped him.
1146
01:12:21,839 --> 01:12:24,216
Kidnapped him? Which monsters?
1147
01:12:24,299 --> 01:12:25,884
The little monsters!
1148
01:12:28,887 --> 01:12:30,848
[pebble clacks]
1149
01:12:34,893 --> 01:12:36,103
[clacks]
1150
01:12:39,773 --> 01:12:40,732
[clacks]
1151
01:12:47,948 --> 01:12:51,326
- Hi, Kiersten.
- Brian, what's wrong?
1152
01:12:51,410 --> 01:12:53,287
I know you're not gonna believe it,
1153
01:12:53,370 --> 01:12:55,747
but I need some help
on my science project.
1154
01:12:55,831 --> 01:12:58,166
Is this some sort of prank?
1155
01:12:58,250 --> 01:13:01,628
No, I'm serious. Look, I need your key
to get into the supply room.
1156
01:13:01,712 --> 01:13:04,923
It's an emergency.
I need some lights.
1157
01:13:05,007 --> 01:13:07,551
Do you expect m e to believe that?
1158
01:13:07,634 --> 01:13:10,053
It defies every rule known
to the scientific mind.
1159
01:13:10,137 --> 01:13:12,222
Oh, so you don't believe me?
Well, watch this.
1160
01:13:18,645 --> 01:13:20,397
Holy shit!
1161
01:13:20,480 --> 01:13:22,399
Amazing!
1162
01:13:23,400 --> 01:13:24,735
[footsteps running]
1163
01:13:43,670 --> 01:13:45,005
[whispering]
1164
01:14:06,610 --> 01:14:08,278
Okay, let's hope this works.
1165
01:14:08,362 --> 01:14:12,366
[Todd] Oh, man! That'll get 'em.
That's like a howitzer or something.
1166
01:14:12,449 --> 01:14:14,576
[Kiersten] You must know a lot
about electricity to do that.
1167
01:14:14,660 --> 01:14:16,745
How come you get Fs in science?
1168
01:14:16,828 --> 01:14:19,373
- Let's go.
- Yeah.
1169
01:14:27,839 --> 01:14:29,257
[Kiersten] What are you doing?
1170
01:14:29,341 --> 01:14:32,678
- I'm setting my alarm for sunrise.
- [Todd] What the heck for?
1171
01:14:32,761 --> 01:14:35,764
All right, when this goes off,
we have three to five minutes.
1172
01:14:35,847 --> 01:14:40,560
If we're not up before the sun clears
the horizon, we turn into monsters.
1173
01:14:41,561 --> 01:14:43,397
- Monsters.
- [Todd] Monsters?
1174
01:14:43,480 --> 01:14:45,607
You mean there's a chance
we might not make it?
1175
01:14:45,691 --> 01:14:48,485
Well, yeah, of course there's a chance.
1176
01:14:48,568 --> 01:14:51,863
I know where Eric is, but I'm not leaving
until I have thim.
1177
01:14:51,947 --> 01:14:53,699
Are you still in? You don't have to.
1178
01:14:53,782 --> 01:14:56,243
I'm in. Eric's my best friend.
1179
01:14:56,326 --> 01:14:58,328
- Come on, let's go.
- Wait a minute.
1180
01:14:58,412 --> 01:15:00,580
Where are you going?
You're not leaving without me.
1181
01:15:00,664 --> 01:15:02,833
In the name of science, I'm going.
1182
01:15:02,916 --> 01:15:06,086
Okay. Let's do it.
1183
01:15:08,422 --> 01:15:09,840
You can't get through without me.
1184
01:15:09,923 --> 01:15:12,259
Hold on. Ready?
1185
01:15:12,342 --> 01:15:14,511
I'm ready.
1186
01:15:14,594 --> 01:15:16,596
- [Todd] Whoa!
- [Kiersten] Whoa!
1187
01:15:22,102 --> 01:15:24,604
- It's a parallel dimension.
- [Kiersten] Wow.
1188
01:15:28,608 --> 01:15:29,943
- Gimme that!
- My knapsack!
1189
01:15:31,111 --> 01:15:32,863
[screams]
1190
01:15:33,947 --> 01:15:34,948
[screams]
1191
01:15:36,825 --> 01:15:38,744
[monster] Light!
1192
01:15:38,827 --> 01:15:41,371
- Light! Light!
- [screaming]
1193
01:15:43,123 --> 01:15:44,374
No!
1194
01:15:44,458 --> 01:15:47,461
[monsters screaming]
Light! Light!
1195
01:15:52,382 --> 01:15:54,384
??
1196
01:15:55,552 --> 01:15:57,054
This way.
1197
01:15:57,137 --> 01:15:59,139
[monsters groaning]
1198
01:16:18,450 --> 01:16:20,535
That's the master staircase.
1199
01:16:20,619 --> 01:16:23,080
It goes up to Boy's room.
1200
01:16:23,163 --> 01:16:26,708
- [Todd] Who's Boy?
- The guy who runs this place.
1201
01:16:27,918 --> 01:16:30,754
Stick with me. I know the way.
1202
01:16:36,593 --> 01:16:38,595
??
1203
01:16:50,732 --> 01:16:53,944
Careful. It's a long way down.
1204
01:17:33,275 --> 01:17:35,193
[doors clang shut]
1205
01:17:47,706 --> 01:17:50,792
Brian Stevenson.
1206
01:17:50,876 --> 01:17:53,170
The real boy wonder.
1207
01:17:53,253 --> 01:17:55,547
What a pleasure it is
to finally make your acquaintance.
1208
01:17:55,630 --> 01:17:57,382
Where's Eric?
1209
01:17:57,465 --> 01:18:01,011
And you brought some little playmates
along with you. How nice!
1210
01:18:01,094 --> 01:18:05,307
Are they as tactful and fleet-footed
as yourself? I daresay they don't look it.
1211
01:18:05,390 --> 01:18:07,726
I want my brother!
1212
01:18:08,935 --> 01:18:11,688
Now, Brian...
1213
01:18:11,771 --> 01:18:14,524
what sort of a greeting is that?
1214
01:18:14,608 --> 01:18:17,068
After all, we are so much alike.
1215
01:18:18,361 --> 01:18:24,117
If you stay,
you'll be the one in charge of yourself.
1216
01:18:25,118 --> 01:18:28,413
Perhaps this whole world... in time.
1217
01:18:29,915 --> 01:18:33,543
You'll be the one with the power,
the authority.
1218
01:18:33,627 --> 01:18:36,922
Not your parents, not your teachers.
1219
01:18:38,256 --> 01:18:39,883
You.
1220
01:18:39,966 --> 01:18:41,760
[laughs]
1221
01:18:43,845 --> 01:18:46,806
- [whirring]
- [boy] Now, Brian...
1222
01:18:46,890 --> 01:18:48,767
isn't that what you want?
1223
01:18:48,850 --> 01:18:50,602
[grinding]
1224
01:18:52,938 --> 01:18:56,233
- [bear thuds]
- I want Eric now!
1225
01:18:57,901 --> 01:19:00,111
Brian...
1226
01:19:00,195 --> 01:19:02,030
why such cruelty?
1227
01:19:06,701 --> 01:19:12,249
You're a very unique individual, Brian.
1228
01:19:14,084 --> 01:19:18,171
Your feat's unprecedented here.
1229
01:19:18,255 --> 01:19:23,718
Why, I can scarcely remember the last time
one of our little breed had been trapped,
1230
01:19:23,802 --> 01:19:26,972
not once but numerous times.
1231
01:19:27,055 --> 01:19:30,475
Enough wind, loafer breath!
Hand over the kid!
1232
01:19:30,558 --> 01:19:32,102
Where is he? Let's see him!
1233
01:19:33,687 --> 01:19:34,980
Very well.
1234
01:19:37,732 --> 01:19:41,820
Let's have the contestants
take a look behind curtain number one.
1235
01:19:41,903 --> 01:19:43,822
[buzzer sounds]
1236
01:19:49,244 --> 01:19:51,079
Brian?
1237
01:19:52,872 --> 01:19:53,873
[Boy] Brian.
1238
01:20:00,797 --> 01:20:03,842
Let's make a deal.
1239
01:20:03,925 --> 01:20:07,679
It's your wits and grace that I desire,
1240
01:20:07,762 --> 01:20:10,640
not those of your pugnacious chum
1241
01:20:10,724 --> 01:20:13,935
or even your silly,
mute little girlfriend.
1242
01:20:14,019 --> 01:20:18,857
I'll let them all go, and your brother...
1243
01:20:20,817 --> 01:20:23,236
if you'll stay...
1244
01:20:24,779 --> 01:20:26,031
and be my pal.
1245
01:20:27,032 --> 01:20:28,366
No deals.
1246
01:20:30,452 --> 01:20:31,870
Very well.
1247
01:20:35,332 --> 01:20:37,334
- [gasps]
- Eric!
1248
01:20:37,417 --> 01:20:39,669
- [Boy laughs]
- [gasps]
1249
01:20:40,670 --> 01:20:42,005
Let him go now!
1250
01:20:42,088 --> 01:20:44,049
I'll give you 10 seconds.
1251
01:20:44,132 --> 01:20:47,802
- Ten, nine, eight...
- [hisses]
1252
01:20:49,512 --> 01:20:51,723
Be sensible, Brian.
1253
01:20:51,806 --> 01:20:55,310
Why lose five lives
when you can gain four?
1254
01:20:55,393 --> 01:20:58,730
In an hour, you and your chums will all be
monsters and then we can all play.
1255
01:20:58,813 --> 01:21:02,233
- ...seven, six...
- Brian?
1256
01:21:02,317 --> 01:21:04,986
- ...five, four...
- [buzzer sounds]
1257
01:21:05,070 --> 01:21:07,447
- Hi-ya!
- [laughs]
1258
01:21:07,530 --> 01:21:09,240
Let's blow 'em away, Brian!
1259
01:21:09,324 --> 01:21:11,034
...three-- let Eric go--
1260
01:21:11,117 --> 01:21:13,912
two, one!
1261
01:21:13,995 --> 01:21:17,707
[screaming]
1262
01:21:19,084 --> 01:21:21,086
[all scream]
1263
01:21:21,169 --> 01:21:23,171
??
1264
01:21:25,006 --> 01:21:27,008
[whirring]
1265
01:21:41,022 --> 01:21:41,856
[yells]
1266
01:21:59,290 --> 01:22:01,918
Hi, are you looking for your brother?
1267
01:22:02,001 --> 01:22:04,796
Well, we've got him! [growling]
1268
01:22:04,879 --> 01:22:09,050
- [laughs]
- [screams] No!
1269
01:22:09,134 --> 01:22:12,554
I had hoped we could be friends, Brian.
1270
01:22:12,637 --> 01:22:15,974
But evidently you don't play fair.
1271
01:22:16,057 --> 01:22:19,978
- Boy, I haven't even begun to play.
- Let go!
1272
01:22:20,061 --> 01:22:24,274
Snik, show Brian to his room.
1273
01:22:24,357 --> 01:22:27,318
- [growling]
- What? No!
1274
01:22:27,402 --> 01:22:29,404
[screaming]
1275
01:22:31,197 --> 01:22:33,491
Bye-bye, Brian!
1276
01:22:50,925 --> 01:22:53,761
Brian, it's you.
1277
01:22:53,845 --> 01:22:55,472
Todd, is Eric here?
1278
01:22:56,848 --> 01:22:59,350
- Nope.
- Kiersten.
1279
01:23:11,362 --> 01:23:12,572
Ow.
1280
01:23:15,366 --> 01:23:17,911
Maurice, what happened?
1281
01:23:17,994 --> 01:23:20,246
What happened? What happened?
1282
01:23:20,330 --> 01:23:24,501
Two inches lower and this bonehead
would be talking to my lawyer, buddy boy.
1283
01:23:24,584 --> 01:23:26,211
You know him? He's a monster.
1284
01:23:26,294 --> 01:23:28,546
Yeah. Todd, Kiersten, this is Maurice.
1285
01:23:28,630 --> 01:23:30,340
- Hi, pleasure to meet you.
- A monster?
1286
01:23:30,423 --> 01:23:34,511
I have an idea. We can generate light
by wiring pencils to the phone.
1287
01:23:34,594 --> 01:23:37,055
Yo, babe, light from pencils?
1288
01:23:37,138 --> 01:23:39,557
[laughs] And I'm the Pope.
1289
01:23:41,142 --> 01:23:43,394
[Kiersten] Just like a carbon lamp
from a projector.
1290
01:23:46,898 --> 01:23:49,192
- Done.
- Todd, you crank.
1291
01:23:49,275 --> 01:23:51,027
Brian, you hold the pencils,
1292
01:23:51,110 --> 01:23:53,071
and I'll slide the dirty laundry
under the door.
1293
01:23:53,154 --> 01:23:54,531
[laughs]
1294
01:23:54,614 --> 01:23:56,616
??
1295
01:23:58,159 --> 01:24:01,287
- Good idea.
- [Kiersten] Faster, Todd.
1296
01:24:01,371 --> 01:24:06,000
- Go, toad, go! Go, toad, go!
- Faster!
1297
01:24:07,627 --> 01:24:10,547
- Faster!
- I'm tryin'!
1298
01:24:10,630 --> 01:24:11,923
- [Maurice] If at first...
- Come on!
1299
01:24:12,006 --> 01:24:15,009
... you don't succeed, try,
1300
01:24:15,093 --> 01:24:17,595
try-- alive!
1301
01:24:21,266 --> 01:24:23,101
[grunting]
1302
01:24:24,477 --> 01:24:27,438
[grunting continues]
1303
01:24:38,533 --> 01:24:40,159
Okay, now, open the door.
1304
01:24:43,162 --> 01:24:46,541
Okay, Maurice, let us out.
1305
01:24:46,624 --> 01:24:50,253
Any of you freaks know how
to pick a combination lock?
1306
01:24:50,336 --> 01:24:52,964
- [groans]
- [sighs]
1307
01:24:54,716 --> 01:24:57,302
[laughs] Just jokin'.
1308
01:24:57,385 --> 01:24:59,387
What are you doing lying around?
We got work to do, bud.
1309
01:25:00,513 --> 01:25:02,473
Where are you going?
1310
01:25:02,557 --> 01:25:04,309
To get some more firepower.
1311
01:25:04,392 --> 01:25:06,519
Well, you see--
1312
01:25:09,063 --> 01:25:10,481
Let's go.
1313
01:25:10,565 --> 01:25:12,567
??
1314
01:25:17,697 --> 01:25:19,991
All right, let's boogie.
1315
01:25:20,074 --> 01:25:22,452
Come on. Keep going, come on.
1316
01:25:22,535 --> 01:25:25,622
[snoring, chuckles]
1317
01:25:25,705 --> 01:25:28,333
Oh, Ronnie.
1318
01:25:34,005 --> 01:25:35,590
[Kiersten] Only the sunlamps.
1319
01:25:35,673 --> 01:25:37,175
[Todd] Oh, this is good.
1320
01:25:38,593 --> 01:25:40,011
[Brian] Oh, yeah. That's good.
1321
01:25:44,474 --> 01:25:45,558
Here we go!
1322
01:25:45,642 --> 01:25:47,644
??
1323
01:27:01,926 --> 01:27:03,428
Say good night, Boy!
1324
01:27:10,184 --> 01:27:11,644
[yells]
1325
01:27:15,398 --> 01:27:18,192
Aw, shit! [screams]
1326
01:27:20,611 --> 01:27:22,613
??
1327
01:27:26,534 --> 01:27:29,078
- [alarm beeping]
- [Todd] The beep!
1328
01:27:29,162 --> 01:27:30,538
We gotta get outta here.
1329
01:27:30,621 --> 01:27:33,207
Eric's here somewhere, I know it.
1330
01:27:33,291 --> 01:27:34,751
Come on!
1331
01:27:34,834 --> 01:27:36,294
Good luck.
1332
01:27:36,377 --> 01:27:38,296
[Snik] Oh.
1333
01:27:38,379 --> 01:27:41,424
Wait till I get my hand-- I'm gonna kick
your butt with this boot.
1334
01:27:41,507 --> 01:27:45,303
I gotta get it together.
I gotta get myself together.
1335
01:27:48,181 --> 01:27:50,183
[groaning]
1336
01:27:51,184 --> 01:27:53,186
??
1337
01:27:55,813 --> 01:27:57,732
Take the room. You guys take the box.
1338
01:27:57,815 --> 01:27:59,317
- I got it.
- Right.
1339
01:28:01,277 --> 01:28:03,529
- Nope, nothing in there.
- Nothing?
1340
01:28:03,613 --> 01:28:07,366
[Eric moaning] Brian?
I'm here, Brian.
1341
01:28:07,450 --> 01:28:10,119
- Help us with this one, guys.
- [Eric] Please.
1342
01:28:10,203 --> 01:28:12,455
- [grunting]
- It won't budge.
1343
01:28:12,538 --> 01:28:14,707
- Look, a crank, a crank.
- It won't budge.
1344
01:28:14,791 --> 01:28:17,710
[jack-in-the-box tune plays]
1345
01:28:17,794 --> 01:28:19,253
[Brian] Eric!
1346
01:28:19,337 --> 01:28:22,340
- [all] Eric!
- All right, man.
1347
01:28:22,423 --> 01:28:25,468
- Come on, let's get outta here.
- [Todd] Come on, let's get outta here.
1348
01:28:31,641 --> 01:28:33,351
Oh, shit!
1349
01:28:34,352 --> 01:28:36,646
- [groans]
- How much time?
1350
01:28:38,147 --> 01:28:40,191
- Maybe a minute.
- Great.
1351
01:28:40,274 --> 01:28:42,985
- Coleman, you think you could take him?
- No way!
1352
01:28:43,986 --> 01:28:46,614
Looks like there's no way out!
1353
01:28:46,697 --> 01:28:48,699
[laughs]
1354
01:28:50,827 --> 01:28:52,161
Oops.
1355
01:28:53,162 --> 01:28:55,706
Who is that guy?
1356
01:28:55,790 --> 01:28:57,250
[growling]
1357
01:29:00,962 --> 01:29:02,588
Hey, Snik.
1358
01:29:04,715 --> 01:29:06,884
How about a light, bud?
1359
01:29:07,885 --> 01:29:10,471
[screaming]
1360
01:29:12,974 --> 01:29:15,184
Come on, let's go home!
1361
01:29:15,268 --> 01:29:17,395
[screaming continues]
1362
01:29:22,733 --> 01:29:24,735
??
1363
01:29:43,212 --> 01:29:45,756
[excited chatter]
1364
01:29:45,840 --> 01:29:47,717
[cheering]
1365
01:29:47,800 --> 01:29:49,760
Ding dong, the Snik is dead!
1366
01:29:49,844 --> 01:29:53,431
- Yeah!
- [monster] Snik is dead! Snik is dead!
1367
01:29:53,514 --> 01:29:55,099
[monster 2] Snik is dead!
1368
01:30:06,027 --> 01:30:08,821
- [thuds]
- Ow, ah.
1369
01:30:12,867 --> 01:30:14,785
- [grunts]
- Brian, Brian.
1370
01:30:16,412 --> 01:30:17,747
Wait.
1371
01:30:17,830 --> 01:30:20,499
- Let's go.
- Sit down.
1372
01:30:20,583 --> 01:30:24,253
- What?
- Brian. Sit down.
1373
01:30:25,838 --> 01:30:27,757
It's--
1374
01:30:31,052 --> 01:30:33,971
It's-- it's too late.
1375
01:30:35,556 --> 01:30:37,642
What's that supposed to mean?
1376
01:30:37,725 --> 01:30:40,728
It means we've dissected our last frog.
1377
01:30:40,811 --> 01:30:44,231
We're stuck. We're monsters.
1378
01:30:47,610 --> 01:30:49,528
Well, I can handle that.
1379
01:30:49,612 --> 01:30:50,947
Yeah.
1380
01:30:52,406 --> 01:30:54,116
Yeah, well, I can't.
1381
01:30:55,701 --> 01:30:58,245
Come on, follow me.
1382
01:30:58,329 --> 01:31:00,498
Whoa, where you going, bud?
1383
01:31:00,581 --> 01:31:02,959
- West!
- [Eric] Hey, Brian, wait up!
1384
01:31:03,042 --> 01:31:04,627
- Yeah, Brian.
- Brian.
1385
01:31:04,710 --> 01:31:06,504
Hey, Brian, wait up!
1386
01:31:06,587 --> 01:31:08,589
??
1387
01:31:11,550 --> 01:31:13,386
- Come on!
- I'm coming!
1388
01:31:28,526 --> 01:31:30,528
??
1389
01:31:34,573 --> 01:31:36,367
Whoa, whoa.
1390
01:31:36,450 --> 01:31:37,994
Sun's up in St. Louis, bud.
1391
01:31:38,077 --> 01:31:40,454
[kids groan]
1392
01:31:40,538 --> 01:31:43,499
Phoenix! Phoenix! Where's Phoenix?
1393
01:31:43,582 --> 01:31:45,418
Huh, Phoenix? Thataway!
1394
01:31:45,501 --> 01:31:47,044
Thataway. Come on, kids.
1395
01:31:57,805 --> 01:31:59,807
??
1396
01:32:02,101 --> 01:32:03,853
Ah, ooh, ooh, ah, ooh.
1397
01:32:03,936 --> 01:32:06,605
Whoa, hey, Bob. Guess the sun's up, huh?
1398
01:32:06,689 --> 01:32:07,940
I got it. It's really smoking.
1399
01:32:08,024 --> 01:32:10,818
Ooh, ooh, ah, ah. Try California!
1400
01:32:27,835 --> 01:32:29,170
[panting]
1401
01:32:45,478 --> 01:32:47,354
- All right!
- [kids cheer]
1402
01:32:47,438 --> 01:32:49,523
Come on, kids! You're going home!
1403
01:32:49,607 --> 01:32:51,609
- All right!
- We're coming!
1404
01:32:51,692 --> 01:32:53,903
- Yeah.
- Here we go. Goin' home.
1405
01:32:53,986 --> 01:32:55,780
Going up. Yeah.
1406
01:33:00,034 --> 01:33:01,911
Wow.
1407
01:33:01,994 --> 01:33:03,454
- We're going home.
- You're going home.
1408
01:33:03,537 --> 01:33:04,914
Whoo!
1409
01:33:10,002 --> 01:33:13,130
- Come on.
- We're going home, guys.
1410
01:33:21,222 --> 01:33:26,018
- Come on.
- Radical, man. [laughs]
1411
01:33:28,521 --> 01:33:30,815
[Ronnie grunting]
1412
01:33:31,899 --> 01:33:33,651
Come on, yeah.
1413
01:33:36,028 --> 01:33:38,531
Come on, Ronnie.
1414
01:33:41,534 --> 01:33:44,120
Oh, pardon me, sir.
1415
01:33:47,206 --> 01:33:48,541
Well...
1416
01:33:51,043 --> 01:33:52,586
you're next.
1417
01:33:56,590 --> 01:33:58,717
Kinda wish I could stay.
1418
01:34:00,177 --> 01:34:02,179
You'd be a hero down here.
1419
01:34:02,263 --> 01:34:05,975
Maurice, my arm-- I mean, it turned
to clothes last night.
1420
01:34:06,976 --> 01:34:09,186
Don't worry about that.
You'll sleep that off.
1421
01:34:09,270 --> 01:34:11,856
Nothing's permanent
unless you get trapped down here, bud.
1422
01:34:11,939 --> 01:34:13,065
[chuckles]
1423
01:34:13,149 --> 01:34:16,944
But I suppose you gotta get up there
1424
01:34:17,027 --> 01:34:18,571
'cause you're gonna
get married pretty soon.
1425
01:34:19,572 --> 01:34:21,615
Married? To who?
1426
01:34:22,616 --> 01:34:24,869
Well, to Lightbulb, Red.
1427
01:34:25,953 --> 01:34:28,038
Oh, Kiersten? No.
1428
01:34:29,248 --> 01:34:30,416
Just friends.
1429
01:34:31,584 --> 01:34:32,918
Friends.
1430
01:34:33,919 --> 01:34:35,713
Yeah.
1431
01:34:35,796 --> 01:34:36,922
Well...
1432
01:34:38,299 --> 01:34:40,342
I guess that's what it's all about, huh?
1433
01:34:41,343 --> 01:34:44,054
Yeah. I guess.
1434
01:34:46,098 --> 01:34:49,476
- You know what?
- What?
1435
01:34:49,560 --> 01:34:51,228
You're the best friend I've ever had.
1436
01:34:53,981 --> 01:34:55,733
Well...
1437
01:34:57,276 --> 01:34:59,612
you're the ugliest friend I ever had.
1438
01:35:00,821 --> 01:35:02,823
But you belong up there. Come on.
1439
01:35:02,907 --> 01:35:04,950
I'm gonna miss you, Maurice.
1440
01:35:06,076 --> 01:35:06,952
I really am.
1441
01:35:07,036 --> 01:35:09,788
[Todd] Let's go, Brian.
The sun's coming up.
1442
01:35:09,872 --> 01:35:12,499
There's no way I'm running to Hawaii.
1443
01:35:15,669 --> 01:35:18,756
Hang on. Hang on.
1444
01:35:24,094 --> 01:35:27,223
- Oh, no, Maurice.
- Ah, just relax.
1445
01:35:28,599 --> 01:35:30,601
I can get another one.
1446
01:35:31,936 --> 01:35:34,104
How else are you gonna
remember me, anyway?
1447
01:35:34,188 --> 01:35:36,941
[Eric] Come on, Brian. Let's go.
1448
01:35:43,906 --> 01:35:46,158
Bye, Maurice.
1449
01:35:57,461 --> 01:35:59,463
??
1450
01:36:06,887 --> 01:36:11,183
Remember, where there's a bed,
there's a way.
1451
01:36:13,894 --> 01:36:15,312
Come on, buddy.
1452
01:36:24,697 --> 01:36:27,574
- Yeah!
- [cheering]
1453
01:36:27,658 --> 01:36:30,828
["Road to Nowhere"
by Talking Heads begins]
1454
01:36:30,911 --> 01:36:32,705
Come on, let's go!
1455
01:36:32,788 --> 01:36:34,832
??
1456
01:36:50,014 --> 01:36:51,640
- [Todd] Come on!
- [Ronnie] Come on, Brian!
1457
01:36:57,396 --> 01:36:58,564
Let's go.
1458
01:37:04,862 --> 01:37:06,613
Yeah!
1459
01:37:08,782 --> 01:37:10,784
Yeah!
1460
01:37:12,953 --> 01:37:16,373
["Road to Nowhere" continues]
1461
01:37:16,457 --> 01:37:17,958
[cheering]
1462
01:37:20,461 --> 01:37:22,880
[phone ringing]
1463
01:37:28,469 --> 01:37:31,138
- Hello?
- Mom, I've got Eric.
1464
01:37:31,221 --> 01:37:33,057
- Oh, it's Brian.
- It's Brian.
1465
01:37:33,140 --> 01:37:34,767
- He found Eric.
- Are they all right?
1466
01:37:34,850 --> 01:37:36,352
- Are you all right?
- Yeah, we're fine.
1467
01:37:36,435 --> 01:37:38,228
- Oh, they're all right.
- Thank God.
1468
01:37:38,312 --> 01:37:40,647
- Hey, tell 'em I'm here.
- Look, Dad's here.
1469
01:37:40,731 --> 01:37:42,524
Stay right where you are.
We'll come and pick you up.
1470
01:37:42,608 --> 01:37:44,234
- Where are they?
- Where are you?
1471
01:37:44,318 --> 01:37:46,779
- Malibu.
- They're in Malibu.
1472
01:37:46,862 --> 01:37:48,197
- Malibu?
- Massachusetts?
1473
01:37:48,280 --> 01:37:49,948
- Where the hell's that?
- Where the hell is that?
1474
01:37:50,032 --> 01:37:53,410
- California.
- California.
1475
01:37:53,494 --> 01:37:55,245
California? How the hell'd they get there?
1476
01:37:55,329 --> 01:37:56,663
What on earth are you doing there?
1477
01:37:56,747 --> 01:38:00,834
Um, it's kind of a long story.
1478
01:38:00,918 --> 01:38:03,128
["Road to Nowhere playing]
1479
01:38:05,172 --> 01:38:09,385
? Takin' that ride to nowhere?
1480
01:38:09,468 --> 01:38:11,595
? We'll take that ride ?
1481
01:38:13,847 --> 01:38:18,435
? Maybe you wonder where you are?
1482
01:38:18,519 --> 01:38:20,312
? I don't care ?
1483
01:38:22,356 --> 01:38:27,194
? Here is where time is on our side?
1484
01:38:27,277 --> 01:38:30,823
? Take you there, take you there?
1485
01:38:30,906 --> 01:38:32,908
[instrumental break]
1486
01:38:40,165 --> 01:38:43,961
? We're on a road to nowhere ?
1487
01:38:44,044 --> 01:38:45,671
? Hah, hah ?
1488
01:38:49,007 --> 01:38:52,261
? We're on a road to nowhere ?
1489
01:38:52,344 --> 01:38:54,471
? Hah, hah ?
1490
01:38:57,808 --> 01:39:01,270
? We're on a road to nowhere ?
1491
01:39:01,353 --> 01:39:03,272
? Hah, hah ?
1492
01:39:04,982 --> 01:39:06,900
? There's a city in my mind ?
1493
01:39:06,984 --> 01:39:08,861
? Come along and take that ride?
1494
01:39:08,944 --> 01:39:12,406
? It's all right, baby, it's all right ?
1495
01:39:13,407 --> 01:39:15,325
? And it's very far away ?
1496
01:39:15,409 --> 01:39:17,828
? But it's growing day by day ?
1497
01:39:17,911 --> 01:39:21,081
? It's all right, baby, it's all right ?
1498
01:39:22,082 --> 01:39:24,168
? Would you like to come along? ?
1499
01:39:24,251 --> 01:39:26,295
? You can help me sing this song ?
1500
01:39:26,378 --> 01:39:30,007
? It's all right, baby, it's all right ?
1501
01:39:31,008 --> 01:39:32,968
? They can tell you what to do ?
1502
01:39:33,051 --> 01:39:35,053
? But they'll make a fool of you ?
1503
01:39:35,137 --> 01:39:39,475
? And it's all right, baby,
it's all right ?
1504
01:39:39,558 --> 01:39:41,810
? There's a city in my mind ?
1505
01:39:41,894 --> 01:39:43,979
? Come along and take that ride?
1506
01:39:44,062 --> 01:39:47,274
? It's all right, baby, it's all right ?
1507
01:39:48,275 --> 01:39:50,360
? And it's very far away ?
1508
01:39:50,444 --> 01:39:52,779
? But it's growing day by day ?
1509
01:39:52,863 --> 01:39:56,116
? It's all right, baby, it's all right ?
1510
01:39:57,117 --> 01:39:59,036
? Would you like to come along? ?
1511
01:39:59,119 --> 01:40:01,121
? You can help me sing this song ?
1512
01:40:01,205 --> 01:40:05,501
? And it's all right, baby,
it's all right ?
1513
01:40:05,584 --> 01:40:07,503
? They can tell you what to do ?
1514
01:40:07,586 --> 01:40:09,880
? But they'll make a fool of you ?
1515
01:40:09,963 --> 01:40:14,885
? And it's all right, baby,
it's all right ?
1516
01:40:15,969 --> 01:40:19,890
? We're on a road to nowhere ?
1517
01:40:19,973 --> 01:40:21,475
? Hey ?
1518
01:40:24,478 --> 01:40:28,315
? We're on a road to nowhere ?
1519
01:40:28,398 --> 01:40:29,775
? Hey ?
1520
01:40:33,237 --> 01:40:37,115
? We're on a road to nowhere ?
1521
01:40:37,199 --> 01:40:38,951
? Hey, yeah ?
1522
01:40:41,995 --> 01:40:45,666
? We're on a road to nowhere. ?
1523
01:40:46,667 --> 01:40:50,379
[crunching, chewing]
1524
01:40:54,466 --> 01:40:57,052
- [chips rustling]
- [crunching continues]
1525
01:41:30,210 --> 01:41:31,628
[Maurice burps]
104555
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