Original subtitles

- What is this place?

- This shit is tore up!

- You said your grandfather lives here?

- Yeah.

- When was the last time you came to visit him?

- MAN: [yelling]

That'd be two years, four hours and three days.

Hook me, son.

Don't tell nobody but I grow weed in the backyard.

- Please, I want the owner arrested.

- I'm the owner.

- How?

- I bought the place.

With, uh, what would have been your inheritance.

- If we move in here we could make some money, baby.

- Tell grandpa. - Ooh, no!

- Grandpa, Leah got something she wanna tell you.

- ?

- Baby.

- What?

- Go tell the kids.

- You go tell the kids!

- Baby.

- No, no, no, baby, I can't.

I cannot take it.

I can't take the disppointed look on they faces.

- Don't try to act like you like the kids.

- Don't do that, that's not funny.

- They'll be fine.

- Will they?

- Yeah, it's beautiful...

Hell, they'll make new friends.

- Will they?

We can save a lot of money.

- Yeah, and so they can go to school.

- Right, right.

- So, go talk to 'em.

- I'm not doing this with you today, Jeremy.

- Leah.

- I'm not talking to the kids about this, I can't do that.

- Okay, alright, look, I'm going to talk to Grandpa.

Okay?

- He went that way, baby.

- Baby, that's an abyss down there.

- Oh.

- What if I get lost?

- Ooh, that'd be great.

Ooh, guess what?

And then I get your inheritance.

Hey.

- [chuckling]

You ain't in my will.

- [gasps]

- I better be.

Who gonna take care of your kids?

- I'll be dead, it don't matter.

- Okay baby, I'mma wait right here for you.

- Okay. - LEAH: I'll be right here.

- Alright. - LEAH: I'm not leaving.

I'm itching.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. [cries] Baby!

- ?

{n8}? No matter what you do, I love you ?

{n8} ? No matter where you go

{n8} ? I'm behind you for sure

{n8}? Always remember, blood ain't never water ?

{n8}? We'll make it if we stay together ?

- Okay, maybe I can, like, decorate,

clean up a little bit.

- Oh my gosh, what is that?

Skin?

[blowing]

Alright, okay, okay, alright.

"The assasination of Dr. Martin Luther King Jr."

Why does he have that?

- Can we go now?

- Sandra.

- No, I have been offline for over an hour.

- You will be fine.

- You don't understand.

- Yes, I do.

- How could you understand, you're old?

- Oh, no.

- She moving towards me?

- About to.

- I'ma just move over here.

- Smart.

- I'm sorry, Mom.

- Keep it up. - I really am.

- Mm-hmm. We are here to see your grandfather, okay?

- Well, didn't we see him?

- We need to spend a little more time with him.

- Yeah, 'cause every minute's like an hour

'cause he doesn't have many days left.

- [laughing]

- Phillip, that wasn't nice.

- I'm just saying, you've seen him.

- [chuckles]

- Would you stop it? I mean that, boy.

- Okay, I'm sorry for telling the truth.

- Ha, ha, ha.

See, okay, alright, y'all keep it up.

Y'all gonna be his age one day.

- Oh, oh, so is that what this is all about?

- What do you mean?

- Oh. [chuckles]

She's worried that we're gonna put her and Dad

in a place like this in a couple years.

- Couple years. [chuckling]

Okay, little girl.

- Mm-hmm. Oh, but don't worry Mom,

you're gonna love it.

- You know what?

I was thinking about putting you in a place like this.

- A lot sooner.

- What does that mean?

- You gonna find out.

- I think she's threatening us with boarding school.

- At least there'll be reception.

- You're right.

- So, what do you all think of this place?

- What do you mean?

- Ya know, this place. [giggles] Look around.

- It's sad and it smells too.

- No!

I mean, you know, we could just clean up.

- What do you mean, "We"?

- Uh.

- You and her.

- You know, we could put some paint up here

and get rid of these cobwebs.

- PHILLIP: What is she doing? - This carpet...

Ooh, I like that bookcase over there.

- I don't know, but I don't like it.

- Yeah, she needs to stop watching

those decorating shows.

- You know, that is what does it.

- Yeah, yeah, HGTV.

- Mm-hmm.

- Remember what she did to my room last year?

- Oh, my God.

- It was awful. - It was awful!

- You know what else is awful?

- What you're gonna do to us if we keep talking?

- Yes, my kids are smart.

So, look, don't you see the potential in this place?

- Yeah.

And I would love to see the potential

from the rearview mirror.

- Oh, kids, come on.

I mean, you know, like, don't you wanna spend

just a little more time here?

- We spent enough time here, okay.

- Right, and I'm here with the loser.

- You're the loser.

- Your mama!

- What?

- Is she coming near me?

- About to.

- I did not... I didn't mean that.

- Yes, he did.

- Force of habit.

- Ah-ha!

So you be talking about me?

- No, no, no, that's not what I meant.

It's like...

- PHILLIP: You... you know, the kids at school,

they be like, "Your mama fat."

And then I be like, "No, no, no, your mama so ugly."

I be like "my mama so ugly but your mama ugly."

Be like, "Your mama ugly."

You know what I mean.

- Nah, I don't know what you mean.

Explain.

- Mom, you're not that old.

I mean, you know "Your mama" jokes.

- I got a joke for... - Okay, wait, wait, wait, wait!

- I'm sorry.

- Yeah, you keep saying you're sorry.

- I mean, you know how kids are.

We're just...

- Just what?

- Silly.

- Okay, silly.

[laughing]

You know what, but I really think that we should

look at this place.

Take a look around.

You don't like it?

- Hey, y'all seen my Grandpa?

- You can't find him, baby?

- Nah.

- Okay, let's leave a note.

- Where was his room?

- Somewhere back there.

Just follow the sound of the loud farts.

- I'mma check this side.

- LEAH: Okay, baby.

- Hey, baby.

- Hmm?

- This place is huge.

- Is it?

- Yes, yes, a lot of rooms.

- Well that's good.

- Guess what, guess what? We can make a lot of money.

- Okay. Okay.

- Well, that's good for Grandpa.

- Yeah, it is. [chuckling]

- And good for us when we leave.

- Well...

- What?

- Uh, what y'all think about staying here

just a little bit longer?

- Mom.

- Yes?

- Are you trying to kill me?

- LEAH: [stuttering]

- No, no, yes, you are.

- Only sometimes.

- Mom.

Stay here for how long?

- Never mind.

- Good, because if I had to stay here, I would just die.

- Good thing there's a graveyard across the street.

- LEAH: Baby?

- She cannot be serious!

- I think she is.

She had that serious look on her face.

- No, that was the cramps look. Tell me it's her cramps look!

- I don't, I don't think it was her cramps look.

The cramps look look like this.

She did more like...

Not...

- You might be right, you might be right.

- ?

- Nasty.

[laughing]

Nastier.

Ooh, that's real damn nasty there.

Ooh, it's nastier this way!

[chuckling]

Ah, n... Ooh, scratch and sniff, look at that.

- [knocking]

- Who the hell is it?

- JEREMY: It's me, Grandpa.

- Nobody home.

- JEREMY: Can you open the door, please?

- Come on in.

- Hey.

- And who the hell are you?

- What are you talking about? I'm your grandson.

- Well, what the hell are yo doing here?

- Grandpa, we been here.

Don't you remember? I saw you earlier.

- Oh, man, I thought that was three days ago.

- I have got to stop smoking my own shit.

- Grandpa, I got a huge question for you.

- What's that?

- You left handed or right handed?

- [bleep] how many hands do you see?

- How do you roll a joint?

- Very slowly.

Now what in the hell do you want?

- What do you mean?

- Just what I said.

- You don't remember us coming to see you?

- Boy, let me tell you something.

My mind is as tight as them damn jeans you have on.

- They ain't that tight.

- Yes they are.

- They're called skinny jeans, Pop.

Well they should be called blood pressure jeans

'cause I can see what the hell you working with.

Or bitch-ass jeans 'cause I see a camel toe.

- Them, them my [bleep], man.

- You got two?

- Grandpa.

- I only got one.

I was wiping too hard one day.

Boy, I'll tell you about it, I'm just guessing,

but your wife got to be very unsatisfied.

Yeah, you better watch it 'cause that'll make 'em cheat.

I ain't never had a woman cheat on me and Tyrone.

- Who is Tyrone?

- Mm, you don't need to see him.

Stand back, I'll show you.

- Will you stop it?

- That's what she said.

- You cannot be kin to me.

- Well, I am.

- Well, it's been established on the top half.

But I don't know about that bottom half.

- I am part mule.

[neighing]

- Look, man, I have something I wanna talk to you about.

Will you stop?

- Oh, excuse me, you come in here for some serious shit.

Now, why don't you go on home?

Go out that door and hook a left.

- I wanna talk to you about this place.

- What about it?

- I mean, do you think you can make some money?

- You mean, opening back up as a facility?

Hell no!

I was gonna turn it into a whore house.

But I was gonna only work with old hoes.

Bring all them hoes out of retirement.

Sometimes when a hoe reach a certain age,

don't nobody wanna mess with them no more.

So that's why I'mma call it "The Old Hoe House."

Nah, I'm just BS-ing you boy.

Me and your grandma was happy.

Boy, before it got all, you know, disorganized it was,

the place was beautiful.

- Okay.

- Oh man, the staff was amazing.

- Ah, good, I like that.

- The place was much cleaner and everything was great.

- Good, good, good.

- We had a little STD problem round here but...

- Everybody didn't get it.

- What about you?

- Nah, I took some shots in the ass

and that cleared it up.

- Alright.

- Don't tell your grandma.

- She's dead, Pop. Is that how she died?

- No, she died 'cause the dude who stole her all the time

stole her medicine.

- But it used to be really great in here

before all that happened.

- Okay, that's good to hear, that's good to hear.

- But you know what we really loved

back in the day?

- JEREMY: What's that?

- Boy, I'mma tell you what we really loved.

Ooh, doing the sexy, nasty, boy, your grandmama. [chuckles]

- Hey, hey.

- No, I'm telling you boy, your grandmama, before...

- Hey, man!

- Her legs was loose, ain't nothing like old [bleep]

with brand new hips.

- Come on, Pop. I'm not trying to hear that.

- No, boy, let me tell you, man.

- Nah man, don't tell me.

- Wobbly. [muttering]

- Stop it, man.

- But you can't spank that ass, especially with the hook.

But she really loved you.

- Well, thank you.

- I remember when y'all would get together,

she would kiss you every time she saw you.

- Right on the lips.

- Yeah, but...

- But what?

- [chuckles]

If you knew where them lips had been.

- Come on, man.

- Oh, my God. They was all over me.

- Hey, don't nobody wanna hear that.

- Man, them lips!

- Would you stop it?

- And them false hips!

- I'm gonna walk right out of here if you don't stop it.

- Okay, see the problem is you don't get it, do you?

- What?

- That's what I'm trying to get you to do.

- Look, come on. Pop. Man, I love you.

- Take your lying ass back to Chicago

and them bastards... Not your wife, I like her.

She cool.

She good people.

She got a nice ass.

Can't help me from looking. - You ain't lying.

But look, man, that's what I'm trying to talk to you about.

- Boy, you just left us here.

- No, I didn't.

- Yes, you did! - I was working.

- Yeah, well, you know, you went up there

and you lost your job.

- Yeah, but that wasn't my fault.

- Why is the [bleep] in the unemployment office

always trying to blame everybody else?

It's always the man.

- Okay, look, what are you doing?

- [bleep]!

How many times I gotta say it?

I'm trying to get you to leave.

Follow instructions: go out the door, hook a left.

- Grandpa, I love you, man.

- Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit.

- I love you and I love Grandma.

- No, you don't.

- Yes, I do.

- You know what?

You can keep your little "I love you, I love you,

I love Grandma."

But you know what? Your inheritance has been spent.

- Yeah, I know that.

- You know what? And look around, this it.

- I have been.

- Been what?

- Looking around.

- And?

- This place, [bleep] is in bad shape.

- Don't worry about it, I'll fix it up.

- How?

- I got some favors I can call in.

You know, Earl, he got, he missing one hand too, so...

And then Johnny, he got diabetes

but he can work a half a day.

And, and his wife, she can lift stuff.

So we got it covered.

- I remember her.

- Yeah, she's real good for hanging wallpaper.

- Grandpa, to finish this place, 80-year-old men

couldn't do it.

- It's gonna be a bunch of 80-year-old men in here,

don't worry about it. It won't be one.

- Well, I am.

- Why?

- Hello.

- [grunts]

- Are you trying to get up?

- Uh, duh!

- Wait a minute, am I missing something?

- Well, you did spend my inheritance on it.

- Yes I did, and what you gonna do about it?

- Hey, hold up. - Whoa.

- Calm down, calm down.

- Whoa, boy, don't walk up on me like that.

Don't let the hook fool you 'cause I'll whoop your ass.

- Hey, Grandpa, stop before you hurt yourself.

- No, no, I'm not gonna hurt myself.

I'm gonna hurt you.

- Grandpa, will you sit down?

- No, I'm gonna be standing up

over your knocked-out-ass body!

- Why are you getting so hostile?

- [bleep], you making me [bleep] hostile,

and this medication too!

- Okay, aight, alright, I see how this gonna go.

- Oh, I know how it's gonna go.

Your ass on the floor, that's where it's gonna go.

- Oh, yeah? - Yeah.

- You think so? - I know so.

- Did you know before I lost my hand I was a boxer?

- Yeah, when you was in th Navy.

- They don't have a one hand division,

but I could have done it.

- That was a long-ass time ago.

- I can still take you on.

- I know, I know.

- No, you don't!

- No, I do.

- No, you, you, you, you, you, you think I'm playing,

don't you?

- Now stop it.

- No, no, no, no, no don't sit down!

Get up!

- Will you stop it?

- ?

- Get your ass up, I'll show you!

- [sighs]

Grandpa. - VINNY: What?

- Stop playing before you hurt yourself, man.

- Oh, I'm not gonna hurt myself. I'mma hurt you.

And you know what else I'mma do?

I'mma whip your ass for doubting me.

- Where the hell is all this coming from, man? Stop it.

- It's coming from in here!

- Look, let me tell you something.

If you hit me, I'mma hit you back.

- Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!

- Okay.

- Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh!

If you do... boy, I wish you would!

- Would you stop it? Sit down.

- I'm not sitting down.

Come on! - I said, stop it.

- No, come on!

Does that hurt?

- No, it didn't hurt.

You hurt your hand, didn't you?

- Shoulda hit you with the hook.

- That hook gonna get your ass whooped, Grandpa.

- Really? - Yes.

- Really? Does that hurt?

- That one hurt a little bit. - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

- Look man, stop.

- Come on!

- Grandpa.

- No, come on, boy!

Put your fists up, you little bitch!

I'll fight you with one hook behind my back.

Come on, hit me, hit me, hit me!

- Grandma.

Oh, oh, I think I just killed my grandpa!

Oh! Oh! Oh!

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