Original subtitles

Great. It says: "Welcome to Hell".

WELCOME 6-CLASS (IN HELL)

This year is gonna suck.

How do you know that?

Oops. That Happens

I just know it.

Last year we were the kings.

Fifth graders. We rulled that school.

This year, nobody likes us

That's true.

Speak for yourself. I'll be fine I got a mustache comming in.

I wanna see it.

No

Noone's got it worst than me.

Do you see that girl over there?

She is gonna torture me every chance she gets

Wait a second, is n't that your sister?

Yeah.

At least you guys have your own rooms. My grandfather stole mine.

Wait, Your grandfather moved in with you guys? When did that happen?

Ever since he robbed the grocery store

Can I help you sir

You can help me find Maria.

Oh, Maria is gone. We are completely self checkout now.

Much faster, much more efficient. I think you will like it.

So the price is gonna be lower because I'm doing all the work now?

We always have everyday low prices sir, everyday

Everyday? everyday.

Get out of my way. get out of my way. No problem.

CASHBOX

- Please scan your item. -I'm talking to a robot.

Please scan your item.

I just did.

Let's see if this thing...

Please scan your item.

You are very boring.

Please scan your item.

Yeah right.

Sir! Sir!

Sir, I need you to stop.

Wait, sir let me help you. hit my leg! Go away!

Come on, sir.

Go ! I'm a senior citizen. Get out of here.

-I know judo! -Go!

Leave the poor man alone!

Your shop stinks.

Are you insane? Stop!

Oh, I see you all wanna play it out.

That's all you've got ? That hurt.

Hey, there's my girl. You didn't have to come all this way I told you I was fine

What happened to the mailbox?

Oh that, some idiot took him out.

Oh crap.

Dad, you are driving again, aren't you? You lost license remember?

No, I didn't loose it, I forgot to renew it.

So now I have to retake the test all over again, which is idiotic

because I've been driving for over 50 years. I mean what am I supposed to do, starve to dead?

I'm coming in.

This can't keep happening.

Don't worry I'm never going back to that damn store again

No, I mean the part about you I had to leave the dealership earlier

Drive two hours each way just to check on you

I didn't ask you to come!

No, you didn't, the police did. Dad I wanna come, I want to be there for you.

But maybe this is now is the time we have to consider...

No, I am not moving! I built this house, I'm gonna die in this housre

And that's it. and you are not putting me in a home!

What if it were our home?

What are you talking about? fish and relatives stink after three days. that's a horrible idea

We'll kill each other. It ain't working no, sorry.

Dad!

I miss her too.

And That's no gonna changes

why moving me out of my house and sticking me in yours.

Oh God.

Maybe we could miss her together.

Yeah, maybe. But you don't have the room in your house anyway. Where would even you put me

The attic? No way!

Come on buddy, don't make it harder than it already is. It's the only choice

Dad! If it's the only choice, then it's not a choice at all.

'Cause a "Choice" means you get to pick

Between at least two things. And this is one thing.

Unless the other is sleep in the yard

And get eaten by a bear.

Don't be so dramatic, Peter

Besides, your sisters is already sharing room.

Yeah, well Sarah told you said that.

No, I know, I know she exaggerates but may... you sta...

Hold on. Shh!

Schhh!

Schhh...

-Hey What's up. - Shh!

Plus the attic doesn't have bathroom And your Grandpa can't do all the stairs.

And the basement ... is the basement.

-Ha! -What?

My Jordans! I just put them first laces.

Hey Peter, do you need help moving upstairs?

Get out! It's still my room.

Not for long.

Go away! go go go!

Peter, I know it's not ideal, but we are

a family and we make sacrifices for each other.

Sometimes very big sacrifices.

Look sweetheart the attic is bigger than this room

Once you move in then that will be your room.

No, it won't. It will be the attic where you put stuff and forget it

just like our old TV or the exercise bike that Dad used once.

True

What? I excercise, what the... look think about it is a fresh new start, alright?

We'll dust everything up put new paint up everywhere.

Get a chance to clean up your turtle tank.

They like it that. get some privacy.

Does it still fit you, sweetie?

Yes

Grandpa!

Grandpa is here, Grandpa is here, Grandpa all the way.

Oh what fun it is to have a Grandpa come and stay, hey

Hey, now remember: we don't wanna overwhelm Grandpa, Ok

So let's let him settle down.

There will be plenty of time to talk to him during dinner ok.

-Oh, I'm not gonna be here. -What?

What? I'm studying with Russel.

"Studying" still means studying, right? It's not slang for something else?

No dad. "Studying" still means studying And I already cleared it with mom.

Grandpa!

Jenny!

Don't body Slam.

Oh, oh, oh, shit.

-Hi, Grandpa. -Hello sweetheart.

Ed.

Artie.

Where is your brother

Peter?

Peter?

Peter!

Kids, let's help Grandpa with his bags.

-Okay, I've got this. I've got it.

OK. Then I'll take the suitcase.

He called me "Artie" again.

Please Arthur, this isn't easy for him.

Hey, Grandpa.

Hey there he is, Look at you.

Look at you. look you are sprouting up like a gloom

Oh, nice sneakers.

Thanks. How do you like your room?

It looks nice. ah, because it's nice.

Easily the nicest room in the house.

Oh I know kid Look, I didn't wanna to be this way either.

Sometimes you have to make sacrifices in a family.

That's true, You're right.

Sometimes you don't even get to vote

That makes two of us.

Be careful with the floorboards They're no fairly up.

I'll remember that, thanks kiddo

I'll talk to you later, Grandpa.

You can visit me in the attic anytime.

It's a creepy place full with spiders and mice.

- Peter! -I wasn't!

Here we are.

You've been robbed, bro.

No, I was invaded.

The worst part is I'm not even allowed to complain about it.

Seems like you've been complaining enough lot, pete.

I mean at home because he is old and we all love him and stuff.

Dude come on get another enemy to invade your base.

You gotta to fight back and stick up to your rights.

I don't have rights.

Everyone has rights. They are in, uh ...uh, aliens something

They are allowed to pursuit happiness It is in the constitution.

Yeah, well all that would be great if I lived in North America.

But it turns out that 153 Burlington Avenue is actually in North Korea.

Woah, Did your parents know that when they bought the house?

What?

I wouldn't put up with this Pete.

I'll get my room back or else it's war.

What do you mean "Or else it's war"?

You want him to attack his grandfather?

Sneak attack, Emma.

See, He cannot fight him the normal way because his grandfather has strenght, size

And experience, while Peter is weak, small and dumb.

You're a bad friend.

Hi, Steven...uhm

Mom says don't forget to wear your sandals when you shower in Gym Class

Not cool, Lisa.

My brother has that toe fungus thing Totally gross and contagious.

Contagious?

Gross.

It's only on six of my toes

That's a lot of toes, bro.

Hi grandpa.

Hi sweetheart.

Do you wanna play a game? I have "reindeer run"

I have "Santa's World", I have "1-2-3 Christmas tree".

Maybe, but not right now, okay?

Wanna watch a movie? I have "Frosty the Snowman".

I don't think so. Okay, sweetheart? Maybe tomorrow?

Okay.

What's wrong with Grandpa?

Why? What happened?

He doesn't wanna do anything.

He's just staring out the window but there's nothing there except for that tree

That daddy says hes gonna cut down, but you won't let him to use the chainsaw.

Daddy can use the chainsaw anytime he wants honey, OK?

He just chooses to wait until Mommy says it's okay.

Grandpa will be alright. He's just tired and

Thinking a lot about Grandma . He'll be okay

Okay.

Get away from me!

I hate my life.

Oh come on!

Ouch.

"Declaration of war.

When in the course of humanevents, one person steals another person's bedroom

there is no other choice but war.

You have 24 hours. To give me back what is mine

or face the consequences. Secret Warrior. "

Nice handwriting.

It's not bad, it's just you know it's an adjustment, so yeah

Who are you talking to?

what, its Jerry, this time I'm on the phone

No, I would love to, I would love to but I can't

I'm so stuck here. Yeah.

Hi Jerry, It's Sally.

Hey!

-He's not stuck. -What are you doing?

Yeah bring him over Im on my way to work

See you soon, bye Jerry.

So, now you are setting me up on play dates?

Coud I pack your lunch maybe put a note in it?

You want a note? Might not like what it says.

I'll see him some other time, don't feel like it now.

You haven't seen Jerry in ages.

Now you live close. It will be nice.

I can't and I don't want to. I I've got stuff to do. I have to take care of

The light switch in my room now 'Cause Artie put it in backwards

You did!

Eat up. We're going in 15 minutes.

Yes, Mom.

How is it going grandpa did you sleep ok?

Like a log Pete. Thanks. don't you guys have a newspaper around here?

Yeah, we do.

Here it is.

Ahh, I can't read this.

Just make it bigger. See.

Oh, yes.

Jenn...

How does she survive ? She doesn't eat anything.

I don't know. don't be late, Peter.

OK. so? No nightmares?

Me? No.

Insomnia?

Now it's like eight words in the whole screen.

You don't want to talk about anything?

I just make the whole thing disappear! I don't know what i did just now? what the...

Peter, let's go!

Ok well, if you want to talk about something later on , we can do that.

Ok have a good day.

He didn't react at all?

Not a word. what's his game.

What's yours Pete, I mean, come on

You don't start a war with a note

Maybe he didn't actually read it

He read it It was on his desk unfolded.

Maybe he forgot he read old people do that

You do that, Steve.

Oops. that happens...

What the point is, you've already blown the element of surprise.

You've got to attack immediately.

-A mess chilli in your backpack? - He knows.

Yeah.

Hi, Steven.

Oh god no

You left your retainer in the back seat of mom's car.

I think there's snicker trapped in it

At least I hope that's a snickers.

See you at dinner.

Oh god it's a snickers

Comming along, Arthur?

Not bad if you feel like big boxes.

Big boxes built this company.

Yes. Yes, they did.

Are you sure that's the Walmart food print?

Walmart? I thought this was for Kmart.

It's Walmart.

Oh man. I'm sorry. I've got a lot on my mind these days.

My father-in-law just moved in with us, so ...

I don't know. I feel like he judges me

He thinks I work for some soul sucking corporate firm

That has no interest or care or worries of it's ...

...it's employees.

Have a good time.

From, I'm just gonna walk home?

Well, you can if you want. Or you can use this.

I already have a phone.

That's not a phone. I don't know what that is. Just take it.

Okay, this is a car service called "Lyft".

If you wanna go home, you just swipe that, somebody comes to get you.

You don't need cash, you don't have to talk to anybody.

Swipe. Swipe it.

Bye, Dad.

Oh! okay.

-Say hi to Jerry for me. -I will.

Holly cow, this is all yours? This is like a college kid dream room.

Are you kidding? No college kid can afford this.

The pool table alone is six grand.

And you use all these stuffs?

Of course I do.

What do you wanna do first? Play pool ? Pump some eye like a man?

And what the heck is that?

That is a onewheel. and they are fun.

And you actually ride that thing?

Hell yes

Epic!

You should see me.

Wow!

Yo, Jerry! Oh! sorry I didn't know you were ocupado

This is my old friend Ed.

Ed, hi, Danny.

Glad to meet you. So are we walking?

Yeah.

Oh good. 'Cause my Masseuse told me if i get 10 thousands steps this week

She will meet me for coffee.

By "coffee" I mean, you know

Coffee?

Yeah, coffee.

Good morning ladies.

Really, dude?

These jogger pants are gonna be the death to me.

Why do you do that?

What? They think I'm cute.

Yeah, "Cute like, an old guy. is cute when they still think they have a chance."

Hey I'm a catch.

They know I have a full pension. Two more years and I can ski free as a senior.

Do you ski?

No, I do not. Good morning. Beautiful morning.

How are you? Lovely.

Nice, Nice next time bring up the pension.

And the free ski if you'll ever do.

How is your daughter Place, Ed?

It's okay, I guess She gave me my grandson's room, He is not too happy about it

He sent me this last night.

"... my bedroom, ... no choice, ...face the consequences".

Wow! How did you respond?

I didn't.

-You just gonna roll all on this? -You've gotta respond., come on

This kind of aggression show must stand Semper fi .

I know you were a marine?

And why not. Just saying ...

Ah He's a kid. He getting used to it just as I am

I'm his grandfather, so he is not gonna do anything.

What are you talking about? You have to do something ...

"People who steal other people's room should not sleep well."

Peter? Oh, Peter!

Grandpa. Is that you?

Yes, it's me you know it's me. Do you know what time it is?

Night time?

It's the middle of the night. Come on, It's not funny. I don't like people

playing tricks on me, specially my own grandson.

It's not a trick. It's war.

You don't go to war against your family

You have to have an enemy. to go to war and I'm not your enemy

You've got my declaration. Why didn't you say anything?

Because I was kind of hoping it was a joke.

It's not a joke. You took something of mine and I want it back.

OK. Go back to sleep, you made your point.

But this is over now.

Will see you in the morning, which is almost here

Grandpa? I love you.

I love you too, kiddo

But the war is still on.

Hi grandpa.

-Hey, Jenny. -Can I come in?

Sure, why not.

'Cause when Peter lived here

I was snuck in accessing in

Come on, come on

So what can I do for you?

Nothing. I just like to look at other people's stuff

Do you know my birthday is comming up?

I do.

OK. Just making sure.

What's this?

Those are marbles.

Can i have one

Sure, if you promise to take care of it. They are special.

They are not magic.

People always say that things are magic and they never are.

No, I didn't say that they were magic

but they are special. Come here.

You know that grandma used to build houses?

Yeah, but I wasn't born

That's true, you weren't born But

When you build a house, you always start by doing some digging.

And for some reason you almost always find marbles

I guess because they roll around and get lost easily.

But pretty much every foundation I ever dug, I always

found a marble or two. So guess what I did with them.

What?

I kept them so if you count all those marbles

You will know how many houses i built.

That's a lot of houses.

I worked a long time.

How can't you work right now?

Because I'm much so called retired.

What is retired?

It's when you stop working so you can do other things.

Like your grandmother and I had big plans

but, sometimes things just don't work out

Can I have a marble now?

Sure.

Careful, sweetheart, careful, careful.

Are you okay, Grandpa?

Yeah / yeah, I Just get a rest down here for a while

Can I still have a marble?

Take whatever you want

Oh no no no no

What's it rocking upstairs?

Grandpa lost his marbles.

"Come to my room. Now."

-You wanted to see me? -Yeah. Come on in. Shut the door.

Have a sit.

So, you know that big jar of marbles I have?

No. How would I know about the things you have

in your room...? That used to be mine.

That's good. That's funny. that's real funny.

Everybody likes a funny kid. I thought we were done with this.

All you have to do is tell mom and dad that you will switch room with me

And then. It will be done.

You really want war? Because you know I've been in one.

It's not like video games.

Even if you win, everybody gets hurt.

I only want what's mine

You're playing hard, ah?

I'm not playing.

Fair enough. So what are the rules of engagement?

What?

Rules of engagement what's allowed and not allowed.

- You don't have rules in war. -Oh yes, you do.

"Rule number one: no collateral damage

to civilians or their property. "

That means it can't affect your parents or your sisters.

Agreed.

"Rule number two: no telling."

BEHAVIOUR RULES

This is man to man. Just between me and you. No ratting the other guy out.

Agreed.

OK. Sign!

Okay, you got your wish, "Secret Warrior".

Okay. "Senior Soldier".

But from now on: "You better watch out".

The jungle: A place for animals both big and small, exotic and bizarre

Coexist with one another in the same space and in the same time.

The game: to survive. The state: life or death.

Those who strike first live to see another day

Those who sleep will be eaten alive.

OK. Okay.

What the...what is this stuff?

"Fast drying foam sealant" .

I'll kill this kid, don't mess with me, you little ...

Do you think you're cute?

Then you did the math without the landlord, my friend.

You will be sorry for that, I promise you.

Do you think you're cute? You are not cute!

This one never been spoken of!

I have no idea what you are talking about.

You're doing very well, Grandpa.

Thank you, sweetheart. You are a very good teacher.

Why is your face so red

I dont know.

I may be allergic to something in this house.

Well, I'll be in the shaving cream.

I mean ... school.

Uh, Peter! is that your binder?

Yeah, thanks.

Have a good day at school, kiddo, love you.

Hey Pete How's your super unnecessary war going ?

Not good. I was up all night. couldn't sleep at all.

Diarrhea?

What? No! My grandpa.

Your grandpa has diarrhea?

No! there is no diarrhea , in the story.

I did what you said yesterday and I hit him good multiple times.

I even put hot sauce in his coffee this morning.

So far nothing.

Dude, your grandfather is using psy-ops.

Psychological warfare.

Or, maybe he's just been an adult.

Peter? Have you done talking? , Maybe you'd like

To read us your report on what you did over your summer vacation?

Yeah, sure.

"My Summer Vacation" by Peter Decker.

This summer was one the best summer break I've ever had.

I rode my bike a lot and stop showering

until I smell like a monkey's butt.

Keep reading Peter, go on.

I don't want to. This isn't my ...

Read!

During my vacation I figure out how to freeze my own farts in a baggy.

I didn't write this.

Have a sit. and see me after class.

Psy-Ops.

Amateur.

What's going on here?

The... nothing, nothing! We were just hm...

I was just dropping up some vocabulary drills.

Really?

Vocabulary.

Russell, go! Mia, stay.

Do you ignore that the policy doesn't allow

Boys in this house when noone is here?

Oh, my god, mom, don't blow a gas. 'Cause we weren't doing anything.

Don't you think I was your age once.

The... No, I don't

really ... yeah

'Cause you are...What ...

You are literally...Say it.

Those vocabulary drills are paing off, sweetie.

What the heck...!

Don't start nothing won't be nothing.

He got me.

I got him good. Tape on the door way,

Like I woudn't see that from miles away.

-Rookie! -Tape on the door way.

Tape on the door way.

Step back boys, I'll tee off.

Yeah. I'm steeping back.

We should skip this hole.

-Yeah, Good idea. -Yeah.

I wonder how my grandpa's golf game is doing.

My Jordans!

Dude, I think your grandpa might be a ninja.

My Jordans.

First time?

Unfortunately, no.

What are you, a spy or something?

No. I'm just trying to spy my grandson.

We are in the middle of a tough battle over a bedroom.

I just moved in to my daughter's house so ...

No, no no don't say anything else. so nobody can make me testify.

I won't.

You need a hand.

No, let me give it one more shot.

Oh, come on, yeah... and what am I doing wrong now?

Oh no no I'm...I'm not gonna help you now that way you'll never learn

Make you tough on me?

ah, you're on your way.

Bam! Cars like this 1974 Volkswagen bug used to...

We had one of those remember.

We changed the clutch on it.

Yeah, how could I forget, you dropped the flywheel on my toe.

Well that was your fault. for mistaking me for your son.

Anybody wanna watch anything else maybe? Like ah...

Netflix?

The weather channel?

Sea spam?

"The Grinch" stole Christmas

Hey yeah!

Hey, going to Skyler's house

What? Now?

Yes, I'm studying.

Do you want me to get into a good college or not?

Okay, bye.

She's going to see Russell, I know it.

-What? -none of my business.

No come on, your are gonna say it anyway.

Okay.

My advice about fighting her about a boyfriend is done.

It cost me two years with you.

Yeah. When you started dating Artie here.

That's not true, I don't remember that.

well I do. It was terrible

I was over the house all the time

Yes, you were over the house talking to your mother. You barely talked to me at all.

-Really? -Yeah.

-Sorry dad. -No, don't be, it was my fault.

I thought he wasn't good enough for you til I realized

That wasn't the point. The point was you thought he was good enough for you.

But, you and Artie get on great now.

Because I stopped being an idiot.

But, I'll never get those two years back.

Wow! ah, I appreciate that, Ed.

You're welcome Artie, I mean. I meant that sincerely.

But your career is not so much...

What? Dad!

Nothing against Artie, It's just that I think that people who side their dreams

Who settle for less , are never very happy, that's all.

Really? Well, I find that those same people tend to have secure incomes.

Which then allow them to, I dont know take an aging senior perhaps.

And the name is "Arthur". Come on, honey let's go, It's bed time. Here we go

Night, sweetie.

-Night. -Good night.

I thought you stopped being an idiot.

Sorry.

I can't put anything back together . He took all of the screws

Now I'm sleeping on the floor.

That's hilarious.

Yeah. Ha-Ha.

Dude, you may have to face the fact that

yourf grandfather is just smarter than you...hey

Billy, male snake.

Thanks.

Steven, I found the dog chewing your suckables again.

Those aren't mine.

Really? It says "Captain Steve" on the waistband.

Get out of my room!

"Captain Steve".

See, it's not that hard.

Yeah thanks kiddo

Okay off you go. A lot of thanks.

Yeah, Now we're talkind?

- I know something you could do, Peter. -what?

You could use some of the mental energy spending

On picking up stupid tricks to play on your grandfather to not get a C in math.

Who cares about math? This is real life.

... says the guy building a fake castle in a video game.

Petersburg isn't a castle, it's a palace.

And after three years in the making, it's almost finished.

Too easy.

Ah no. Oh!

And then see if the light is on.

No no no!

Every beginner knows that.

What the...?

Grandpa's cookies

Did you bring it?

You have the cash

Dude it's all there.

I'm sure is, Pete. I'm sure is.

Not funny, Peter!

Nice snake, nice, nice snake! nice snake

You can take all you want, whatever you want!

I'm just, I just can go, go over here.

Don't mind if I do, Eddie.

You stay there. You stay there. You stay there!

What's that?

It's a Baylor necklace.

A what? Like those TV commercials?

You expect me to wear that? Absolutely not. Absolutely not, no way

You know you use or wear under your shirt and nobody could even see it.

You can't see that.

If you don't wanna wear it for you , wear it for me.

-But I don't need this. -Really?

I don't need this

Because Arthur says that you've been acting

Odly.

He has?

For the record: I didn't say "odly".

I said "confused".

"Confused".

Look, look dad, is it so hard to believe that we care about you.?

Probably you wouldn't even use it.

You got that right, 'cause I'm not wearing it.

Look, it gives me peace of mind to know that with just one push of a button

You can get help if you need it.

Please.

Please.

Sweet necklace, Grandpa.

Great reaction, my friend.

And this is how you found him?

Yeah. When I couldn't reach him online I got worried.

My life's work, ruined.

Oh I see it's a pile of rubble.

He destroyed Petersburg.

I've been building it for more than a third of my life.

Actually, three twelfths are exactly 25 percent,

Which is less than a third of your life.

Well it is.

It's okay buddy.

Ah, you see dear.

I was right the boy is comming around.

Do you both promise to use your words?

I promise.

Why are we doing it this way?

Because when you have peace talks, you need someone neutral to mediate

otherwise you just break down into yelling

This is dumb!

Well we are doing it besides it took me five minutes

To get on this chair, I'm not getting out.

Grandpa promised. you have to promise.

Okay fine. I promise.

Good. Now,I will admit the hostilities may have escalated more

Than neither of us anticipated

You don't touch another man's computer.

That's not cool!

That's what war is all about, kiddo

War! I just want my room back!

No yelling!

I'm not yelling, he is yelling.

Say you are sorry to Grandpa.

No, It's ok sweetheart.

-I love you, Grandpa. -I love you too.

-Stop that! -stop what?

-What's going on here? -Nothing's going on here.

You're supposed to be neutral!

I don't even know what that means.

Means you shouldn't act like you like him better than me.

I do like him better than you. He gave me a cookie.

Okay, that sounds worse than it is. It is true a cookie was given

But it was way before this negotiation was even scheduled.

Chocolate chips. My favorite.

Mine too.

That's it I'm done. peace is canceled.

No yelling!

Shut up!

"Shut up" it's a bad word!

Peter.

Can I get my second cookie now?

Peter, peter, peter, hold up please come on youre right a cookie may have been involved

Which may have been an attempt to influence the mediator, which in retrospect may have been inappropiate

"may have been"

Okay to be thin with the negotiation with a bit of an attitude yourself

You didnt even give peace a chance, either

Why should I? You demolished Petersburg.

But that's what I've been trying to tell you when this all started.

War is not game, Peter.

Only kids, and fools and generals think that. War hurts.

War ruins, and kills and causes misery. We gotta end it somehow.

How?

What if we have one final competition the winner takes it all?

What kind of competition?

I don't know, you pick.

Whatever you wanna do this all thing will be over.

-Whatever I want? -Whatever you want.

Okay.

It's not a date. It's just that we need a fourth in the team,

it needs to be a woman and I don't know anyone else.

So Let me get this straight you want me to help you

And your buddies to beat up your grandson and his buddies

Because the two of you can't figure out some way to live in the same house?

Well, when you put it like that...

I'm in. my granddaughter can be a pain in the butt sometimes.

Holly Mary we're dead

Ah that's just an Intimidation tactic Danny.

Don't let them see your fear They feed of that.

They are like baby velociraptors.

Yeah, yeah, velociraptors.

Do you guys even remember how to play dodgeball?

Did they even have dodgeball in the 1,800's?

They're wise ass kids, I know that.

Just remember not headses.

And no nutses. No aiming for the junk.

Yeah what he said.

Hope you brought your Poligrip, old man? 'Cause those false teeth are comming out.

Big words for a little baby. Sure you don't need your diaper changed?

Sure you don't?

-Men! -tell me about it.

You're gonna love the attic, Grandpa.

You're gonna see about that Pete boy.

-Let's get it on! -Let's get it on!

Yeah!

Hi!

Run for your lives!

Fire!

Why did I agree to do this?

Man down.

Hey, we said, no headses!

Oops. It slipped.

Next game! A O P P Team: One.

A R P T team: none.

My ears are ringing. This is barbaric.

Man up, Danny, get in the game.

Who is this again?

Bring it in guys, bring it in

Obviously they are way too fast for us.

We are gonna have to play our own way if we wanna win this thing?

-Am I right -yeah, yeah, yeah

Okay I have an idea...

Game two! position people!

Grab them!

Fire!

Yeah. Now you are in trouble.

Boom!

Out! Out! Out! two catches in a hit. You three.

Come on, you old cute, give me your best shot!

Well, if it is Mr. Headses!

Nutses.

Oops. Slipped.

That's game two. We're Tie. One on each. Final match, the winner takes it all

You okay? Okay.

Positions people!

What's he doing?

Danny!

You are an animal!

Hell yeah, Whose house is this?

-Our house! -Our house!

Yeah!

Let's do this!

Jerry! What happened?

I broke something.

I definitely heard a pop.

Dude! I mean old dude are you okay

Of course he is okay, dummy.

1,2,3,4.

You! get out!

chiss!

Hey, you can't get me, I'm on fire!

Sorry, Danny!

Oh, what's up son.

You two, out!

What?

That's not fair.

Yeah right, that doesn't count. He was already out and he throws like a girl.

Diane, that was a friendly fire. Are you playing for wrong agent now?

You three, out!

Sorry, Peter's grandpa, but I'm gonna end you!

Hey, what happened to the sisterhood?

Sorry, Kid.

You will not a die in vain.

This is so dumb.

Yeah, yeah, yeah You're out now, off you go!

-Go ahead! -Yeah.

- Come on, Peter! you've got this -End him!

-Get your room back. -Come on!

-Let's go! -Finish him, Ed! yeah go Ed.

What are you waiting for? end it. I've got an eight years old birthday party up next

It's a tie!

-No way! -what!

What? No way! I totally caught his ball before he caught mine.

No, I caught the ball first.

- Seriously, he caught it before him. -He bubble his.

I didn't buble anything

He is got butter fingers. See butter.

He is old, his fingers don't work. I've got one finger that works

Okay, that's enough. Game over. Go home. All of you, seriously.

I won this...yeah sure... I won

Are you kidding?...You lost I'm sorry, you know that... What are you talking about, I obviously cought it before you

This place has a bar?

What's this?

I'm just drawing.

It doesn't look like one of your usual what you call them "boxes".

Yeah.

No, don't get me wrong, I mean, It's interesting really I like it. Is this for work?

No, the city is taking bid for addition to the library so...

I thought I'd submit a design.

But you know how it is. I'm sure They'll just pick one of the big firms.

Well, you miss100 percent of the shots if you don't take.

You know who said that?

Uh, no.

Wayne Gretzky. Best hockey player of all time.

I was gonna...i was gonna say that.

The great one?

The greatest.

Still not a sports guy?

No.

Okay, good.

-Found him! -Ready to sedate!

Just lie down, sir.

-What is this? -Hold him!

We're trying to save your life, sir. get that thing away from me!

Sir, you are not helping!...I just bought this you idiot

Don't worry, sir, you are in good hands!

Get rid of that thing or you're dead!

Patient defends himself. We may need restraints.

restraints. I don't need restraints!

You know, I hate that test.

I think I did pretty good.

Get in the car.

Uh, thanks, but I think I Just I'm gonna take the bus home with my friends.

Come on, get in the car.

Bye.

Friend of yours?

That's Chuck. You don't need to know about Chuck.

Um ...

Where are we going?

Clear Lake. Nice place, you'll like it.

You know I'm only 12, right?

There's a lot of life still to live.

I can be president some day.

Or be the first person in a mission to Mars.

Holy heck!

Get out!

You know mom is expecting us for dinner.

Maybe I should call her, let her know where we are.

No problem, we'll bringing dinner home tonight

I rented for a couple of hours . I thought, me and you

could do a little fishing. Together

How does that sound?

Great.

I mean I'm not gonna have fun.

You'll have fun.

I think I caught one.

What a wave, eh! Gotta be a big one.

It's huge! nice going

That's not a fish that's a whale.

He really fought too.

We're gonna have some good eating tonight.

I'll give you some bait again.

Okay.

OK. cast away!

Nice cast.

Thanks. This is kind of fun.

Yeah it is. That's what happens when we put our differences aside, see?

Are they biting?

Pretty good. Caught a couple of nice ones.

Oh good for you. That's probably because

Not too many people fish here. It's been ilegal.

-What? -What?

You could ask the ranger. Here he comes now

-Throw the fish out! Those are our fish?

Throw the fish!

-Why? -Make it up!

The cooller!

Forget the cooller.

You're breaking the law!

He's gaining on us.

He is gaining on us.

What are you doing?

I gotta call Chuck to pick us up.

He left us? What kind of friend is that?

Friend? He is my Lyft driver. I don't know the guy.

Pull over or face the consequences!

Hold on, the landing will be tough.

Grandpa come on!

Hey, why didn't you tell us there was no fishing?

You wouldn't rented the boat!

Stop, stop! hold it!

-That was so cool. -Yes, it was.

But breaking the law is wrong, you know that, right.

Yeah. I know.

Pull over here, Chuck. I wanna show you something, Pete.

So this house this house facade, I built it.

They changed the color, I don't like that. What do you think?

I like it.

Maybe It's not so bad.

You know, over the years, when I wasn't feeling so good

I came by and take a look.

I've seen people living in a thing I built raising families

Making lives and... I felt better.

Do you feel better now?

Yeah, I do. Hey, you wanna know a secret?

-Yeah. -come on.

People who build houses usually sign their work,

Like an artists sign their paintings.

Really?

Yes, but It's always hidden.

Some guys sign their names on a rafter, others put something under the floorboards

Like a newspaper with the date the house was finished.

One guy used to write poem at the bottom of a toilet

before he installed it.

What did you do? oh me, well

I always had one of my guys take a picture of me and your grandmother.

And then I would sealed the picture inside the wall next to the fireplace.

So there are photos of me and your grandmother

Inside the walls all over this partner city.

Nobody knows but you

And now you do.

That's cool.

We'll make an angler out of you yet, kid.

Maybe next time we will find a lake with a lot of fish...

Oh yes there are plenty of lakes teeming with perch.

-Oh, yeah fat ones too. -Yeah, ropers.

-Grandpa? -yeah, Pete?

Thank you for taking me fishing . I had a really great time.

Oh, you are welcome. I had a a great time too. Let's do this more often.

Yeah. Sure.

See you at dinner.

That's good, you got me

You got me good. You are a dead man

-Upps.

That happens

wow, not Again

Oops That happens.

Ok Im gonna put this in the hat right here.

Did you put the words in that one?

I'm doing that right now.

"Come celebrate Jennifer's super fun Christmas theme birthday party"

Great job.

Do you like it?

Love it.

Is this empty?

Thanks Ed. for coming. You never like to go alone on such occasions.

Carl was one of my long time adventures buddies.

He'll be missing, the old warrior.

How is he...? You already know...

Fell asleep. When skydiving.

Looking good bro.

So did you come here alone?

That's my husband.

I could drive you home.

What the...

Sorry.

Crap.

What? Damn it!

Sorry about this, Carl.

I don't know this guy.

So, grandpa. How was the funeral yesterday?

Really nice. Thanks for asking.

How about you? anything exciting happen at school .

No. Unless you call getting punched in the face

By a a giant eight grader exciting

Really?

Yeap.

What happened?

He got a full load of orange juice as soon as he opened up my backpack.

It's so weird right?

Hello boys.

Hey, Dad.

Hey, I'll set this stuff down and I'll help you

to put the lights on the roof, Ed.

Thanks Arthur. I said "Arthur".

Don't you two make a nice team.

Jenny's birthday is going to be so exciting.

All that's left to do is find Santha Claus

In early september and I'll be done.

Don't you worry yourself. I know Santa personally. Consider it done.

Thanks dad. That's so sweet.

That's the least I can do for Jenny.

Mom, before you say "no", hear me out.

Can Russell come to Jennifer's birthday party?

-No. -What?

Why? Peter's friends got to go.

That reminds me I invited Jerry and the crew if that's okay.

Yeah, that's great.

And you don't see how unfair this is?

I hate you!

I don't wanna hear it.

Hey, Peter?

Yeah?

Listen ...you know In World War I, the Germans and the British put down their weapons on Christmas Eve

In favor of celebrating rather than fighting during the holiday

Your sister's birthday is a special occasion, it should be celebrated.

I guess you are right

Ok, then let's agree on a temporary truce for Jenny.

Deal?

Deal.

No!

Oh, stop it! You are hurting me Au.

That looks like fun.

Yeah, lots of fun.

We like fun too.

I forgot, I got detention today.

Looks like you are on your own.

I have a question, Do you know my grandson, Peter Decker?

Thought so.

-Dumpster. -What?

Don't make it harder than it has to be, kid.

Come on, fat man.

-Who are you guys? -Come on!

Disciplinary Board.

Leave Peter alone, understood?

Phew, overripe. Not your lucky day, tough guy. Get him in there

No! No! Not! No!

Nasty!

Get me out of here! Hello?

Wow!

Merry birthday, sweetheart.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JENNIFER!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY

It is quiet. Too quiet.

Billy, they agreed. His grandpa is not gonna do anything.

If my grandpa makes a move I'll be ready See that Santa's chair?

SANTA'S WORKSHOP

A booby trap it.

Did somebody say booby?

Go away, Steve.

The egg nog taste funny.

Let me fix it for you.

Hey everybody! Guess Who's Here!

Ho Ho Ho! Merry Christmas, Here comes Santa!

-Yes, Santa Claus! -Juchhu!

You better watch out, You better not pout.

Toys and goodies. I've got everything.

Wait a second. That's not my grandpa.

Ed?

No thanks. I've gotta stay alert. Just in case.

Kid wouldn't have the cojones to do anything. You shook on it.

You never know you can't trust these kids.

Hey, Grandpa.

Hey Nice party, ah pal?

Sure is, buddy but I... I thought you were playing Santa Claus?

Me? Oh no, I'll leave that to the professionists.

Jerry've been more Santa ever since he retired. Have a problem, Pete?

Why would that be a problem?

Just asking. Hey, you wanna hand me one of those soda over there?

Thanks, kiddo.

The kid is up to something, I can feel it.

That is just a coincidence.

Ho Ho Ho. And what's your name?

Let me guess. It wasn't a name 20 years ago Am I right?

-Peter? -Dad, what's up?

Do you know where Mia is? She's supposed to help me with the hot dogs.

-Nope. -Okay, come on I can use your help.

Hey grandpa. What happened to you? You're all wet.

Some questions don't have answers, Pete.

Hey, Cooky?

-No, It's okay. -Oh, They're delicious.

-No, it is really fine. -Especially this one.

-I'm good. -You sure?

I'm sure.

Wanna help me get some mustard and ketchup on this bad boys

And get them out to the kids before they get cold?

Sounds good, dad. I'll be the front row you'll be the back?

You are the boss.

I'm so sorry That just slipped.

I swear I didn't mean to do that.

What you gotta do?

Oh darn. Bottles must be overly full.

Hey dad? The Christmas lights are on the fritz again could you check on them?

I'm on it.

Yeah, and Peter, check on the air pump for the bouncy house?

It could be a little bit...bouncier.

What the heck is he up to now?

Grandpa!

Dad!

Dad!

Dad are you alright?

I'm Okay. Found a quarter in it.

Peter, we said no pranks.

We shook hands on a man to man it. What happened?

What are you talking about?

Grandpa, I swear I didn't do that!

Santa is dead.

Okay, I might have do that.

That is not good.

Danny, Ed, ...

Did you see that? Epic.

Here comes Santa. Ho Ho Ho!

Oh...My fakes!

Jerry! You alright?

What happened?

Fire!

Everybody get back! I've got this.

Dad, I'll get the hose.

Okay. Pull the grip, got it ...

"Put away from face ..." I am blind, I am blind!

I've got it!

Grandpa, get out of the way!

My Christmas tree!

My Christmas birthday cake!

Oh, what have we done?

No no!

Peter!

Hi, Mom.

Mia? Russell?

Don't you run away, Russell!

Nothing happened.

Okay, this in not my fault.

Hey help, anybody?

That's a pretty good scratch there, Mr. Marino.

Yeah?, you should see the tree.

Thank you.

What? What? It's nothing. I'll be alright.

Sure you'll be alright. Dad's always alright.

Doesn't need anyone's help or love

Oh Sally, please come on.

You could have been killed! dad

Come on, you're over dramatizing. It was an accident, that's all.

-An accident? -Yeah.

well, do you think I dont know about the "war"?

Dad ... or should I say "senior soldier"?

Oh, oh that.

What were you two thinking?

Don't blame the kid, sally Please, it's all on me

I'm the grown up here, I should've known better.

Yeah you should have.

I'm so sorry. I just got out of hand.

I have the money to pay for everything.

I'll take my crew and we'll fix everything the way it was.

It's not about the house or the money, Dad.

If you hated living with us so much, you just should have said it.

I never said I hated living with you.

Exactly, I just said you never said.

Well I'm saying, I never said that. We cleared that up, hopefully?

No! Forget about what you never said

The, the point is I just stop..., when you come home with us, you realized that we loved you

And you changed your mind about living alone.

Of course that didn't happen.

You were so hell bend on ...

...Comming it up.

-Are you okay, Grandpa? -Yeah, grandpa is fine.

Listen sweetheart Im really sorry about what happen in birthday party.

It's okay. I brought you something to make you feel better.

That's very nice. But I gave that to you, remember?

Don't you want it?

I think you need that more You can call it loan.

That's very adult of you sweetheart.

You'll be able to take him home soon.

The doctor just need to review the x-rays.

We'll be in the waiting room.

Can I go see him now?

No, no. It will be a long time before we leave the two of you

alone together again ...ever.

Is he gonna be okay?

He'll be fine. You and Mia, On the other hand, that's a different story.

You are both cho-grounded for the next six months.

Cho-grounded? What does that even mean?

Chores plus grounded.

Time six months.

-What? -Yeah, yeah

So, that's a whole out of both isn't it?

But I didn't even do half of the stuff that peter did. That is so not fair.

Can I be cho-grounded too?

No, sweety, you don't have to be cho-grounded.

Russell!

Don't you move a muscle!

What? Wait. Mom! come on

Russell?!

Dad, can you think rational...

Russell!

But she said not to move.

Get away from me!

Get back in, coward!

Come!

Okay, that's it. Mom is certifiedly insane. I'm going out there.

Wo, wo, wo. Hold on, hold on, I know your mother She's can handle this.

You won't slam me, right Mrs. Decker?

No.

What's happening right now?

What's happening right now is I'm not gonna lose two years of my daughter, Russell.

Come on take it before I change my mind.

Come by the house tomorrow.

Really?

Yeah. And bring some work clothes.

I have this giant hole on the second floor. Needs fixing.

Okay.

How that go?

Thanks a lot mom.

I didn't hurt him.

Everything is gonna be alright.

Let's go get Grandpa and go home.

Excuse me, could you check on Mr. Marino, see if he is ready to go?

Oh, he left already. I thought you all left.

He said his brother was picking him up.

Brothers?

Yeah. Chuck ...?

Chuck.

Who is chuck

Dad?

Ed?

Grandpa! Grandpa!

Grandpa!

Mom!

I just called the phone of Jerry, He haven't seen him.

I shouldn't have pushed him so hard.

It's Peter's fault. He needed grandpa to go away.

Yeah peter But at least you got your room back, happy now?

Peter? You still with us.

I think I know where Grandpa went.

I like the fireplace a lot. They don't make it like this anymore.

Thanks. You know there are secrets inside these walls .

Wait!

I started this, I'd like to be the one to end this.

Hi, Chuck.

-Grandpa! -Peter.

hm, what's going on? You moved out of your room

It's your room, kiddo. It always was.

I've decided I want you to have it.

I don't want you to leave, Grandpa.

Peter, I think we both know that the room will always be between us.

No it won't. besides I love the attic.

I don't know why I got mad about the old, smelly room in the first place.

Honest. See, you've gotta come back.

It's not that easy, kiddo.

I'll do anything. I'll get back every marble for you, I swear.

Oh, Pete.

Grandpa, please. I feel so ashamed of how I acted

I just wanna crawl up ball and die.

It's all my fault.

No, don't you believe that for one second. We both have fault.

You were just defending what was yours.

Maybe this is how a war gets started and just goes on and on.

Your enemy does something bad to you, so you do something worse back to him.

And he gets you back, and you get him back.

And the whole thing just gets worse and worse.

And then at the end somebody just drops a bomb.

Isn't it how it happens?

That's how it happens.

I never want to go to war.

I'm very glad to hear you say that.

And I hope to God you'll never have to.

Can I tell you something more?

I kind of enjoyed messing with the fellow crazy man.

Really?

Yeah. It helped me get off of my sad grief of your grandmother.

plus ... you got me pretty good a couple of times .

Not as good as you got me.

Yeah.

Please come home, Grandpa.

Come here.

3 MONTHS LATER

Well, Mr. Decker, your sign it right there.

You know I was gonna cut this tree down by myself.

But my wife has that whole chainsaw thing.

You know I can use the chainsaw any time I want.

Yeah, I believe that man, if you need anything else

Just give a call at the office, alright?

I mean, I can use it anytime I want .

A little more dignity, please.

It's just a chainsaw. what? Did she say something?

Paz

Hey grandpa. I'm ready to go fishing.

Oh, Petey,I guess I forgot to tell you. I can't take you fishing today.

Why? It's saturday we always go fishing. It's our thing.

I know, I know we do kiddo, and I wish I could. But I made other a plans. But we'll make up for it.

Like what?

Ah, a little matinée maybe visit that new gelato place.

Ah, see?, that's for me. gotta go. We'll make up for it.

It's everything alright?

Ha, just Peter.

Let's go.

Grandpa! Grandpa!

Hi, Grandpa.

-There! -His fingers don't work!

No. Better this way.

-Too much? - it fits!

Oh! Sorry!

Once again.

Once again.

I see you're doing ... I like it, stimulates blood circulation.

Russell! Russell! Russell!

You have to cut that out.

Shit sorry. I've got a frog in my throat.

Do, Re, Mi, Fa, Sol, La, Si... ha ha ha.

Did he move?

The guy is still alive.

In the next episode you will see ...

Let's do that again?

Hey how can I help you? How can I dubby dub you?

How can I help you? -dubby dubby dubby, Yeah!

No, it doesn't do anything. Moment...

-Oh, come on now. - Well, again.

-What don't you do. - That's life.

And you actually drive that thing?

Hells yes It's fun! F U N N

What the hell was that?.

I didnt know? You were in the marines?

Come on. I'm just saying.

You are so silly.

Let's get him in!

I don't even know you guys

Ok, it's in the box!

...I work for some soulsucking corporate firm

That has no interests and cares or worries of it's...

Okay, cut. Good.

Good talk.