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1
00:00:01,634 --> 00:00:03,802
[whinnies]
2
00:00:03,803 --> 00:00:07,056
Hello. I'm Mr. Ed.
3
00:00:11,394 --> 00:00:13,562
♪ A horse is a horse,of course, of course ♪
4
00:00:13,563 --> 00:00:15,731
♪ And no one can talkto a horse, of course ♪
5
00:00:15,732 --> 00:00:17,900
♪ That is, of course,unless the horse ♪
6
00:00:17,901 --> 00:00:20,069
♪ Is the famousMister Ed ♪
7
00:00:20,070 --> 00:00:22,238
♪ Go right to the sourceand ask the horse ♪
8
00:00:22,238 --> 00:00:23,322
♪ He'll give youthe answer ♪
9
00:00:23,323 --> 00:00:24,407
♪ That you'll endorse ♪
10
00:00:24,407 --> 00:00:26,575
♪ He's alwayson a steady course ♪
11
00:00:26,576 --> 00:00:28,194
♪ Talk to Mister Ed ♪
12
00:00:34,718 --> 00:00:37,971
Hm, I'm getting
a double chin.
13
00:00:37,971 --> 00:00:41,224
I've got to cut down
those alfalfa snacks
14
00:00:41,224 --> 00:00:42,842
when I'm watching TV.
15
00:00:45,562 --> 00:00:47,180
Ed, I have got great news
for you.
16
00:00:47,180 --> 00:00:48,814
We're going camping
this weekend
17
00:00:48,815 --> 00:00:50,983
at Mammoth Lake
in the High Sierras.
18
00:00:50,984 --> 00:00:51,517
Me, too?
19
00:00:51,518 --> 00:00:53,686
Sure, you and me and Addison.
20
00:00:53,686 --> 00:00:56,405
Oh, boy. I've always wanted
to get out there in the woods
21
00:00:56,406 --> 00:00:58,024
and just let my beard grow.
22
00:00:58,024 --> 00:00:59,658
Me, too.
23
00:00:59,659 --> 00:01:02,361
I've always wanted
to let my tail grow wild.
24
00:01:02,362 --> 00:01:06,165
♪ Oh, give me a home ♪
25
00:01:06,166 --> 00:01:07,784
♪ Where the buffa-- ♪
26
00:01:07,784 --> 00:01:09,418
Hey, did you say
27
00:01:09,419 --> 00:01:11,587
old vinegar puss
is coming, too?
28
00:01:11,588 --> 00:01:14,290
That's right. I mean,
the whole trip was his idea.
29
00:01:14,290 --> 00:01:16,458
I can't figure why Addison
wants me along.
30
00:01:16,459 --> 00:01:17,543
He hates me.
31
00:01:17,544 --> 00:01:20,263
Well, I insisted that you come.
32
00:01:20,263 --> 00:01:25,134
And after all, you're
my friend, my pal, my buddy.
33
00:01:25,135 --> 00:01:27,854
And we needed somebody
to carry the pack.
34
00:01:27,854 --> 00:01:29,472
Oh, you do, huh?
35
00:01:29,472 --> 00:01:31,640
Look, I'm a horse,
not a red cap.
36
00:01:31,641 --> 00:01:33,809
Oh, Ed, stop being
temperamental.
37
00:01:33,810 --> 00:01:36,529
It's not going
to hurt you to carry a few provisions for us.
38
00:01:36,529 --> 00:01:40,866
You've got Addison.
Let the jackass carry the stuff.
39
00:01:40,867 --> 00:01:43,569
All right.
I'll rent another horse.
40
00:01:43,570 --> 00:01:47,373
Whoa-ho-ho.
Now the threats begin.
41
00:01:47,373 --> 00:01:49,541
Okay, I'll go.
42
00:01:49,542 --> 00:01:52,795
Atta boy, Ed.
You'll have a wonderful time.
43
00:01:52,796 --> 00:01:54,414
Before I take a trip,
44
00:01:54,414 --> 00:01:56,582
I got to see
what my horoscope says.
45
00:01:56,583 --> 00:01:58,751
Get me my astrology book, huh?
46
00:01:58,751 --> 00:02:02,004
Oh, you and your superstitions.
47
00:02:02,005 --> 00:02:05,808
I'm Pisces, and us Pisces
got to be careful.
48
00:02:05,809 --> 00:02:07,977
You and your Pisces.
49
00:02:09,596 --> 00:02:12,315
Wilbur, look.
I just bought it.
50
00:02:12,315 --> 00:02:13,933
How do you like it?
51
00:02:13,933 --> 00:02:17,186
Set me back 375 bucks.
52
00:02:17,187 --> 00:02:18,821
Wow, that's big.
53
00:02:18,822 --> 00:02:20,990
I bet the next size
comes on wheels.
54
00:02:20,990 --> 00:02:25,327
Oh, boy. Any duck that gets hit
with that goes first class.
55
00:02:25,328 --> 00:02:26,946
Just feel the barrels.
56
00:02:26,946 --> 00:02:29,114
Huh? How does it feel?
57
00:02:29,115 --> 00:02:31,283
Mm, like $375.
58
00:02:31,284 --> 00:02:32,918
And worth every cent of it.
59
00:02:32,919 --> 00:02:34,003
Oh, by the way, Wilbur,
60
00:02:34,003 --> 00:02:37,256
what type of gun
will you be using?
61
00:02:37,257 --> 00:02:38,341
Follow me.
62
00:02:45,932 --> 00:02:48,634
Huh? How do you like it?
63
00:02:48,635 --> 00:02:51,888
Which end does
the cork come out?
64
00:02:51,888 --> 00:02:54,056
I never miss with old Betsy.
65
00:02:54,057 --> 00:02:55,691
When a duck sees me
aim this at him,
66
00:02:55,692 --> 00:02:58,394
he asks for a blindfold
and a cigarette.
67
00:02:58,394 --> 00:03:00,562
Please, do me a favor,
will you?
68
00:03:00,563 --> 00:03:02,731
Never point that
at a bird when I'm around.
69
00:03:02,732 --> 00:03:05,451
I hate to shoot a duck
while it's landing.
70
00:03:05,451 --> 00:03:07,619
Huh. When I pull the trigger,
71
00:03:07,620 --> 00:03:10,322
it'll be laughing out
of the other side of its quack-quack.
72
00:03:11,407 --> 00:03:14,126
Uh, by the way, Wilbur,
73
00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:16,829
did you tell Carol we were
going on this hunting trip?
74
00:03:16,829 --> 00:03:17,913
Sure.
75
00:03:17,914 --> 00:03:18,998
What did she say
when you told her
76
00:03:18,998 --> 00:03:21,166
we are not taking
our wives along?
77
00:03:21,167 --> 00:03:23,886
Nothing. Carol's a good sport.
78
00:03:23,887 --> 00:03:25,505
She knows
that every now and again
79
00:03:25,505 --> 00:03:27,139
us guys got to get
out there in the woods
80
00:03:27,140 --> 00:03:28,758
and just let
our tails grow wild.
81
00:03:30,927 --> 00:03:32,561
I-- I mean our beards.
82
00:03:32,562 --> 00:03:34,180
How did Kay take it?
83
00:03:34,180 --> 00:03:36,348
Like a trooper.
Firing both barrels.
84
00:03:42,322 --> 00:03:44,490
So we'll take
the freeway to Ventura,
85
00:03:44,490 --> 00:03:48,293
and we go to the 101,
up Sepulveda Boulevard.
86
00:03:48,294 --> 00:03:51,547
Go north to U.S. highway 6,
87
00:03:51,547 --> 00:03:55,334
continue on to the junction
of Route 395.
88
00:03:55,335 --> 00:03:58,054
That will be
just north of Homestead.
89
00:03:58,054 --> 00:03:59,672
By the way,
it's a beautiful spot.
90
00:03:59,672 --> 00:04:01,306
We ought to stop
up there sometime.
91
00:04:01,307 --> 00:04:03,475
[coughs]
92
00:04:03,476 --> 00:04:07,813
Keep on 395 to Lone Pine
through Bishop.
93
00:04:07,814 --> 00:04:09,432
And then, let's see,
94
00:04:09,432 --> 00:04:13,235
Mammoth Lake will be
about 13 miles west.
95
00:04:13,236 --> 00:04:14,854
[coughs]
96
00:04:17,023 --> 00:04:19,191
What's the matter, honey?
You feel all right?
97
00:04:19,192 --> 00:04:20,826
Oh, I'm fine.
Just a little cough.
98
00:04:25,164 --> 00:04:27,332
[coughs]
99
00:04:32,755 --> 00:04:33,288
Coming down with a cold?
100
00:04:33,289 --> 00:04:34,923
Oh, no, no, honey.
101
00:04:34,924 --> 00:04:38,177
[coughs]
102
00:04:38,177 --> 00:04:40,345
The doctor said
it was just the air in town.
103
00:04:40,346 --> 00:04:43,599
Oh, that's right.
The air has been kind of pecu--
104
00:04:43,599 --> 00:04:44,683
Doctor?
105
00:04:46,853 --> 00:04:48,471
When did you see a doctor?
106
00:04:48,471 --> 00:04:51,190
Oh, now, Wilbur,
don't you worry about me.
107
00:04:51,190 --> 00:04:52,808
You go and have a good time.
108
00:04:53,893 --> 00:04:56,061
Honey, I'd like to take you
along with us,
109
00:04:56,062 --> 00:04:58,230
but you know how Roger feels.
110
00:04:58,231 --> 00:04:59,315
And he's right.
111
00:04:59,315 --> 00:05:00,399
I mean, honey, I think you men
112
00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:03,653
should get off by yourselves
every once in a while.
113
00:05:03,653 --> 00:05:04,203
[coughs]
114
00:05:07,457 --> 00:05:08,541
It isn't so bad.
115
00:05:08,541 --> 00:05:11,243
I mean, maybe I'll get lucky,
and it'll rain.
116
00:05:12,879 --> 00:05:16,132
No, no, I'm not going
to leave you here.
117
00:05:16,132 --> 00:05:18,300
I don't care how Roger feels.
You're coming along.
118
00:05:18,301 --> 00:05:19,385
I'm going to tell him
right now.
119
00:05:26,426 --> 00:05:27,510
[coughs]
120
00:05:34,017 --> 00:05:35,101
[coughs]
121
00:05:36,736 --> 00:05:38,904
You're wasting your time,
Camille.
122
00:05:38,905 --> 00:05:39,989
I am not taking you along.
123
00:05:42,158 --> 00:05:43,776
I wouldn't go
if you begged me.
124
00:05:43,776 --> 00:05:45,410
[phone rings]
125
00:05:49,198 --> 00:05:50,832
Well, let me answer it.
126
00:05:54,087 --> 00:05:54,620
Hello?
127
00:05:56,255 --> 00:05:56,788
Oh, hi, Carol.
128
00:05:59,509 --> 00:06:00,593
He did?
129
00:06:02,211 --> 00:06:04,379
We are?
130
00:06:04,380 --> 00:06:06,014
Well, I'll start
packing right away.
131
00:06:06,015 --> 00:06:08,183
Uh, thanks for calling,
sweetie.
132
00:06:08,184 --> 00:06:10,352
Oh, Addison, guess what.
133
00:06:10,353 --> 00:06:13,606
Some idiot is taking his wife
along on a hunting trip.
134
00:06:13,606 --> 00:06:15,224
You certainly are, doll.
135
00:06:16,309 --> 00:06:18,477
Oh, we'll make
a perfect foursome.
136
00:06:18,478 --> 00:06:19,562
That's right.
137
00:06:19,562 --> 00:06:22,281
Wilbur, Carol, you,
and the horse.
138
00:06:22,281 --> 00:06:24,449
Oh, Addison,
you're impossible.
139
00:06:26,619 --> 00:06:27,703
Roger.
140
00:06:29,872 --> 00:06:31,490
Roger, we have got
to take Carol with us.
141
00:06:31,491 --> 00:06:33,659
The poor kid is coughing
her head off.
142
00:06:33,659 --> 00:06:35,827
And the doctor says
that it's going to get worse
143
00:06:35,828 --> 00:06:39,631
unless the rains and weather
clears up
144
00:06:39,632 --> 00:06:41,250
and the air gets
a little better.
145
00:06:41,250 --> 00:06:45,053
But you know how dry
it's been lately, Rog.
146
00:06:56,432 --> 00:06:58,066
Well, Ed, the girls are going
along with us,
147
00:06:58,067 --> 00:06:59,685
so tomorrow
at the crack of dawn
148
00:06:59,685 --> 00:07:01,853
we'll be heading
for the tall timber.
149
00:07:01,854 --> 00:07:03,488
I'm not going.
150
00:07:07,276 --> 00:07:08,360
What do you mean?
151
00:07:08,361 --> 00:07:10,529
I thought you were excited
about this trip.
152
00:07:10,530 --> 00:07:14,333
I just read my horoscope,
and the news is not good.
153
00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:15,951
Ed, what are you
talking about?
154
00:07:15,952 --> 00:07:20,289
I'm a Pisces, and it says
if I leave town tomorrow,
155
00:07:20,289 --> 00:07:22,457
disaster will befall me.
156
00:07:22,458 --> 00:07:25,711
Look, will you forget
about these superstitions?
157
00:07:25,711 --> 00:07:27,879
Nothing can happen to you.
158
00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:30,599
Why, you walk around
with four horseshoes all the time.
159
00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:33,302
I wouldn't leave
this barn tomorrow
160
00:07:33,302 --> 00:07:36,021
for all the carrots in Kansas.
161
00:07:37,106 --> 00:07:39,274
Ed, I'm surprised at you.
162
00:07:39,275 --> 00:07:41,977
Don't you know that superstition
is based on ignorance?
163
00:07:41,978 --> 00:07:43,612
So I'm stupid,
164
00:07:43,613 --> 00:07:45,231
but I'm alive.
165
00:07:46,866 --> 00:07:50,653
Now, you listen to me,
you cowardly Pisces.
166
00:07:55,541 --> 00:07:57,159
Now, Ed, you're behaving
like a child.
167
00:07:57,160 --> 00:07:58,244
Now there is nothing--
168
00:08:08,004 --> 00:08:10,723
What is my shoe doing
nailed over your door?
169
00:08:10,723 --> 00:08:12,891
I put it there for good luck.
170
00:08:15,595 --> 00:08:18,314
Ed, you're going to have
the time of your life.
171
00:08:18,314 --> 00:08:21,567
Now, in the morning,
I'll wake you up, feed you.
172
00:08:21,567 --> 00:08:23,185
I'll put you
in your little trailer.
173
00:08:23,186 --> 00:08:25,905
I'll hitch you to the car,
and then we're off.
174
00:08:25,905 --> 00:08:26,989
Off a cliff.
175
00:08:37,833 --> 00:08:38,917
[humming]
176
00:08:43,256 --> 00:08:46,509
Honey, I told you
there's no sense in sweeping.
177
00:08:46,509 --> 00:08:48,677
That dirt goes down
at least 5,000 miles.
178
00:08:48,678 --> 00:08:50,846
You know, it's a lucky thing
you brought us along
179
00:08:50,846 --> 00:08:52,464
to keep this place clean
around here.
180
00:09:02,775 --> 00:09:05,477
You know, I never saw
so many insects in my life?
181
00:09:05,478 --> 00:09:07,646
Will you please
stop spraying me?
182
00:09:07,647 --> 00:09:09,281
I don't intend to bite you.
183
00:09:09,282 --> 00:09:11,984
You didn't talk that way to me
before we were married.
184
00:09:15,788 --> 00:09:18,490
Ah. Oh, that fresh
mountain air.
185
00:09:18,491 --> 00:09:19,575
Nothing like it, hey, honey?
186
00:09:19,575 --> 00:09:21,209
Mm, it's wonderful.
187
00:09:21,210 --> 00:09:24,463
You know, you haven't coughed
once since we've been up here.
188
00:09:24,463 --> 00:09:25,547
No.
189
00:09:25,548 --> 00:09:26,632
Or for that matter,
190
00:09:26,632 --> 00:09:29,885
since you backed the car
out of the garage.
191
00:09:29,885 --> 00:09:30,969
[chuckles]
192
00:09:30,970 --> 00:09:33,672
Yeah, how about that?
193
00:09:41,264 --> 00:09:42,898
Uh, what's this?
194
00:09:42,898 --> 00:09:44,516
That is a duck call.
195
00:09:44,517 --> 00:09:46,151
We hunters use it
to attract ducks.
196
00:09:46,152 --> 00:09:49,939
Its sound is similar
to the actual mating call.
197
00:09:49,939 --> 00:09:51,573
[blows air]
198
00:09:51,574 --> 00:09:53,742
Does it really work?
199
00:09:58,080 --> 00:09:59,164
[Wilbur]
That answer your question?
200
00:10:01,334 --> 00:10:02,952
Silly.
201
00:10:02,952 --> 00:10:06,205
Well, I think I'll wander
down to the water.
202
00:10:06,205 --> 00:10:09,458
I'll see if there's
any high grass we can use for a blind.
203
00:10:09,458 --> 00:10:11,092
You want to come along,
Wilbur?
204
00:10:11,093 --> 00:10:14,346
Uh, no, no, I think
I better stay back here
205
00:10:14,347 --> 00:10:15,965
and protect the girls
from the wild animals.
206
00:10:15,965 --> 00:10:18,684
Well, I don't think
there are any around here.
207
00:10:18,684 --> 00:10:20,852
I just saw a lot of rabbits
on the way up.
208
00:10:20,853 --> 00:10:22,471
Yeah, well,
if they gang up on you,
209
00:10:22,471 --> 00:10:24,639
they can beat you to death
with their ears.
210
00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:27,359
Well, you have to watch it.
211
00:10:30,062 --> 00:10:31,696
Uh, be careful, doll.
212
00:10:31,697 --> 00:10:35,484
If you want Mommy,
just blow that mating call.
213
00:10:50,132 --> 00:10:51,750
Ed, you haven't eaten a thing
214
00:10:51,751 --> 00:10:52,835
since we left home
this morning.
215
00:10:52,835 --> 00:10:53,919
Aren't you hungry?
216
00:10:53,919 --> 00:10:56,087
Nope, just scared.
217
00:10:56,088 --> 00:10:58,256
You can forget
about that horoscope.
218
00:10:58,257 --> 00:11:00,425
We've been on the road
since 6:00 this morning.
219
00:11:00,426 --> 00:11:02,060
Nothing has happened to you.
220
00:11:02,061 --> 00:11:03,145
So far.
221
00:11:05,314 --> 00:11:06,398
- Wilbur.
- What is it?
222
00:11:06,399 --> 00:11:08,567
- I smell a rhinoceros.
- Where?
223
00:11:08,567 --> 00:11:10,185
Point, Ed, point.
224
00:11:12,355 --> 00:11:13,439
Rhinoceros?
225
00:11:13,439 --> 00:11:14,523
Yeah.
226
00:11:14,523 --> 00:11:17,242
Ed, rhinoceros are found
only in Africa.
227
00:11:17,243 --> 00:11:18,861
He could be visiting
a relative.
228
00:11:18,861 --> 00:11:19,945
Oh, Ed.
229
00:11:19,945 --> 00:11:22,113
It's only a couple hours
by jet.
230
00:11:22,114 --> 00:11:24,282
Ed, you are acting
like a coward.
231
00:11:24,283 --> 00:11:26,451
If there's anything
I cannot stand--
232
00:11:26,452 --> 00:11:27,536
[gunshot]
233
00:11:29,171 --> 00:11:31,339
Wilbur, stop hanging
on my neck.
234
00:11:31,340 --> 00:11:34,042
Us cowards like to run light.
235
00:11:34,043 --> 00:11:35,127
You got me nervous now.
236
00:11:35,127 --> 00:11:37,295
That was just a gunshot.
237
00:11:37,296 --> 00:11:41,099
I don't like any shots,
not even penicillin shots.
238
00:11:41,100 --> 00:11:43,268
I'm afraid of guns, Wilbur.
239
00:11:43,269 --> 00:11:45,437
Take me home.
240
00:11:45,438 --> 00:11:48,140
No, Ed, I will
not take you home.
241
00:11:48,140 --> 00:11:51,393
Doesn't it bother you
that you've got a jinxed horse
242
00:11:51,394 --> 00:11:53,562
who may drag you
down with him?
243
00:11:53,562 --> 00:11:55,196
Ah, poppycock.
244
00:11:55,197 --> 00:11:56,815
No, Pisces.
245
00:11:56,816 --> 00:11:57,900
Oh--
246
00:11:57,900 --> 00:11:59,534
[rustling in leaves]
247
00:11:59,535 --> 00:12:00,068
Shh.
248
00:12:02,238 --> 00:12:03,322
What was that noise?
249
00:12:03,322 --> 00:12:05,490
That was my teeth chattering.
250
00:12:12,548 --> 00:12:14,182
Yes, sir.
251
00:12:14,183 --> 00:12:16,885
You can have
that sissified city stuff
252
00:12:16,886 --> 00:12:18,520
with its comforts
and its luxuries,
253
00:12:18,521 --> 00:12:23,392
but give me the rude,
crude pioneer litXfe every tim.
254
00:12:23,392 --> 00:12:26,111
Yep, help me up
and let's get going.
255
00:12:31,534 --> 00:12:33,702
Hey, Davy Crockett.
256
00:12:33,702 --> 00:12:36,404
How about giving me a hand
back with some of these logs?
257
00:12:36,405 --> 00:12:38,573
Oh, sure. I'm sorry. Sorry.
258
00:12:41,293 --> 00:12:43,461
Rog, you're not still sore
at me, are you,
259
00:12:43,462 --> 00:12:45,080
for bring the girls along?
260
00:12:45,080 --> 00:12:46,164
Not anymore.
261
00:12:46,165 --> 00:12:48,333
Frankly, I think it'll do
Kay a lot of good
262
00:12:48,334 --> 00:12:50,502
to get a taste of this crude
elemental life.
263
00:12:50,503 --> 00:12:52,137
You know, she's always gotten
things too easy.
264
00:12:52,138 --> 00:12:54,306
Anything she wanted,
she just ordered from a store.
265
00:12:54,306 --> 00:12:55,924
It's a little different
out here.
266
00:12:55,925 --> 00:12:58,644
I mean, she can't just open
a charge account with a squirrel.
267
00:12:59,728 --> 00:13:01,896
♪ Oh, give me a home ♪
268
00:13:01,897 --> 00:13:03,515
♪ Where the buffalo roam ♪
269
00:13:03,516 --> 00:13:06,235
♪ And the deer
and the antelope play ♪
270
00:13:06,235 --> 00:13:07,853
♪ Where seldom is heard ♪
271
00:13:07,853 --> 00:13:09,487
♪ A discouraging word ♪
272
00:13:09,488 --> 00:13:10,572
♪ And the-- ♪
273
00:13:19,248 --> 00:13:21,416
Boys, dinner's almost ready.
274
00:13:21,417 --> 00:13:23,035
You better hurry up and shave.
275
00:13:23,035 --> 00:13:24,669
Shave?
276
00:13:24,670 --> 00:13:25,754
What for?
277
00:13:25,754 --> 00:13:27,372
Who's coming?
278
00:13:27,373 --> 00:13:29,007
Please, it'll only take
a few minutes?
279
00:13:29,008 --> 00:13:31,176
I don't intend to shave
until we get back home.
280
00:13:31,177 --> 00:13:33,345
Oh, now, come on, nature boys.
281
00:13:33,345 --> 00:13:36,047
The least you can do is go
down to the creek and wash up.
282
00:13:36,048 --> 00:13:37,682
Yeah, please hurry.
283
00:13:37,683 --> 00:13:40,385
We'll hold off lighting
the candles till you get back.
284
00:13:40,386 --> 00:13:44,189
Oh, we wouldn't miss that
for the world,
285
00:13:44,190 --> 00:13:45,274
would we, Wilbur?
286
00:13:45,274 --> 00:13:47,976
Oh, no. It would ruin
the trip for us.
287
00:13:47,977 --> 00:13:49,611
Are you ready, Gaston?
288
00:13:49,612 --> 00:13:51,780
After you, my dear Alfonse.
289
00:14:08,581 --> 00:14:09,665
No, thank you.
290
00:14:12,384 --> 00:14:14,002
Well, my boy,
in a few more hours,
291
00:14:14,003 --> 00:14:16,722
we'll be popping those
big birds out of the sky.
292
00:14:16,722 --> 00:14:17,806
Isn't she a beauty?
293
00:14:17,806 --> 00:14:18,890
Yeah.
294
00:14:18,891 --> 00:14:20,509
I'll bet when the ducks
see that gun of yours
295
00:14:20,509 --> 00:14:22,143
they'll be standing in line
to get shot.
296
00:14:22,144 --> 00:14:23,762
Yeah.
297
00:14:23,762 --> 00:14:25,396
Of course, old Betsy here
won't do too badly.
298
00:14:25,397 --> 00:14:27,565
Oh, please. The only birds
you'll get with that
299
00:14:27,566 --> 00:14:29,184
are the ones flying
a suicide mission.
300
00:14:31,904 --> 00:14:34,606
Mm, isn't that mountain air
wonderful?
301
00:14:34,607 --> 00:14:35,691
Yes.
302
00:14:35,691 --> 00:14:37,325
Aren't you glad
the boys asked us along?
303
00:14:37,326 --> 00:14:38,410
G
Oh, yes.
304
00:14:38,410 --> 00:14:40,028
But you know,
it wouldn't hurt any
305
00:14:40,029 --> 00:14:42,748
to cough
once in a while, sweetie.
306
00:14:42,748 --> 00:14:44,366
[coughs]
307
00:14:44,366 --> 00:14:45,450
[laughs]
308
00:14:45,451 --> 00:14:46,535
Dear.
309
00:14:46,535 --> 00:14:48,169
Oh, look, a baby duck.
310
00:14:51,423 --> 00:14:55,760
Oh, what a cute little doll.
311
00:14:55,761 --> 00:14:56,845
Oh, poor little thing.
312
00:14:56,845 --> 00:14:59,013
He probably got separated
from its family.
313
00:14:59,014 --> 00:15:01,716
Oh, how could anyone shoot
a helpless little creature like this?
314
00:15:01,717 --> 00:15:04,436
Oh, I know. It makes me
feel just awful.
315
00:15:14,730 --> 00:15:15,814
Murderers.
316
00:15:17,449 --> 00:15:21,236
Wilbur, do you have to shoot
duck on this trip?
317
00:15:21,236 --> 00:15:23,955
Well, honey, a hunting trip
isn't much fun
318
00:15:23,956 --> 00:15:25,574
unless you do
a little shooting.
319
00:15:25,574 --> 00:15:27,742
Kay, don't let
that little duckling upset you.
320
00:15:27,743 --> 00:15:29,377
We'll only be shooting
at the big ones.
321
00:15:29,378 --> 00:15:32,631
Would you have the nerve
to shoot this baby's mother?
322
00:15:32,631 --> 00:15:35,884
No, but I'd like to get a few
of his uncles, his aunts,
323
00:15:35,884 --> 00:15:38,052
and maybe a grandfather
or two.
324
00:15:38,053 --> 00:15:42,390
Wilbur, are you going to join
that killing party?
325
00:15:42,391 --> 00:15:43,475
Are you?
326
00:15:46,178 --> 00:15:46,728
Am I?
327
00:15:46,729 --> 00:15:48,897
Of course you are.
328
00:15:48,897 --> 00:15:51,599
We came up here to hunt,
remember?
329
00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:54,319
I told you not to bring
the women along.
330
00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:55,938
Well, if that's
the way you feel,
331
00:15:55,938 --> 00:15:58,106
we don't have to stay
where we're not wanted.
332
00:15:58,107 --> 00:16:00,275
That's right. We can sleep
someplace else, Kay.
333
00:16:00,275 --> 00:16:01,359
Carol, don't be foolish.
334
00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:04,079
Don't you come near me,
you-- you assassin.
335
00:16:06,782 --> 00:16:07,866
Let them go.
336
00:16:07,866 --> 00:16:10,585
Well, if you boys change
your minds,
337
00:16:10,586 --> 00:16:13,839
we'll be sleeping
right over there.
338
00:16:17,092 --> 00:16:20,879
Rog, I don't like the idea
of them sleeping by themselves.
339
00:16:20,879 --> 00:16:23,047
Don't worry. They'll only
be a few feet away.
340
00:16:23,048 --> 00:16:25,216
I know Kay.
The first little noise,
341
00:16:25,217 --> 00:16:27,385
she'll come jumping
right into my arms.
342
00:16:27,386 --> 00:16:29,020
So will I.
343
00:17:08,594 --> 00:17:10,762
Honey, I love you.
344
00:17:12,398 --> 00:17:14,016
I love you, too, doll,
345
00:17:14,016 --> 00:17:15,650
but what are we going
to do with Addison?
346
00:17:17,820 --> 00:17:19,988
Yeah, what'll you do with me?
347
00:17:28,113 --> 00:17:29,197
[duck whistle]
348
00:17:36,789 --> 00:17:40,042
They should be flying
south by now.
349
00:17:40,042 --> 00:17:42,210
I would have to leave
my compass home.
350
00:17:42,211 --> 00:17:43,845
Have you got any idea
which way south is?
351
00:17:43,846 --> 00:17:46,014
Only one way to find out.
352
00:17:46,014 --> 00:17:48,716
You face north. Then you turn
around real quick.
353
00:17:50,886 --> 00:17:52,520
I think this plug of yours
is bad luck.
354
00:17:54,139 --> 00:17:55,773
Did you have to
bring him along?
355
00:17:55,774 --> 00:17:58,476
He gets nervous by himself, Rog.
It's his horoscope.
356
00:17:58,477 --> 00:17:59,561
What?
357
00:17:59,561 --> 00:18:01,729
Well, I mean, I figured
if we got enough ducks,
358
00:18:01,730 --> 00:18:03,364
he could help us
carry them back.
359
00:18:04,983 --> 00:18:08,236
Wilbur, look.
Here they come.
360
00:18:08,237 --> 00:18:11,490
Oh, boy, I've waited
a whole year for this moment.
361
00:18:14,209 --> 00:18:15,293
You pushed me.
362
00:18:15,294 --> 00:18:16,912
No, I didn't, Rog.
363
00:18:16,912 --> 00:18:18,546
All those beautiful ducks gone.
364
00:18:18,547 --> 00:18:21,249
You went soft because Carol
showed you that little duck.
365
00:18:21,250 --> 00:18:22,884
Rog, I didn't push you.
It was Ed.
366
00:18:22,885 --> 00:18:24,503
Oh, please.
367
00:18:24,503 --> 00:18:26,671
He's standing too close to you.
I'll move him.
368
00:18:26,672 --> 00:18:27,222
Yeah.
369
00:18:27,222 --> 00:18:28,306
Come on, Ed.
370
00:18:30,476 --> 00:18:32,094
[ducks quacking]
371
00:18:32,094 --> 00:18:34,813
Wilbur, look.
Here they come again.
372
00:18:34,813 --> 00:18:37,515
Hundreds of them. Oh, boy,
I can't miss this time.
373
00:18:40,769 --> 00:18:42,403
They're gone again.
374
00:18:42,404 --> 00:18:44,022
All on a count
of that stupid horse.
375
00:18:44,022 --> 00:18:47,825
Huh, I can see
Ed isn't wanted around here.
376
00:18:47,826 --> 00:18:49,444
I'll send him home.
377
00:18:51,613 --> 00:18:54,332
We had our chance
and missed it.
378
00:18:54,333 --> 00:18:57,035
There hasn't been a sign
of a duck around here for 45 minutes.
379
00:18:57,035 --> 00:18:59,203
Maybe they're
on their lunch hour.
380
00:19:00,289 --> 00:19:02,457
Why don't you blow
that duck call thing again, hm?
381
00:19:02,457 --> 00:19:04,091
I'm beginning to think
382
00:19:04,092 --> 00:19:06,260
this is more
of a warning whistle than a mating call.
383
00:19:11,133 --> 00:19:12,217
[ducks quacking]
384
00:19:14,937 --> 00:19:16,021
Here they come.
385
00:19:18,190 --> 00:19:19,808
Keep blowing, Rog.
386
00:19:38,794 --> 00:19:41,496
It's no use, Rog.
I can't make this kid an orphan.
387
00:19:45,300 --> 00:19:48,553
All right, you blow the horn
and let me shoot.
388
00:19:51,807 --> 00:19:53,425
The girls are right, Rog.
389
00:19:53,425 --> 00:19:56,144
I couldn't kill a duck
with this little fellow around.
390
00:19:57,229 --> 00:19:59,931
I'm going back to camp.
391
00:19:59,932 --> 00:20:02,651
This gun cost me $375,
392
00:20:02,651 --> 00:20:04,819
and I'm going to shoot ducks
even if it breaks my heart.
393
00:20:09,157 --> 00:20:12,944
Boy, did I have a job getting
this catsup over me.
394
00:20:15,113 --> 00:20:17,281
If this dying routine works,
395
00:20:17,282 --> 00:20:20,535
I may get home safe
before my luck runs out.
396
00:20:21,620 --> 00:20:23,788
Oh, here he comes.
397
00:20:31,380 --> 00:20:33,014
[Mister Ed]
Wilbur.
398
00:20:33,015 --> 00:20:34,633
[groans]
399
00:20:34,633 --> 00:20:36,801
Wilbur.
400
00:20:36,802 --> 00:20:38,436
[groans]
401
00:20:39,521 --> 00:20:40,605
Ed.
402
00:20:40,606 --> 00:20:44,393
Ed, what happened?
403
00:20:44,393 --> 00:20:48,196
I've been shot
by some careless hunter.
404
00:20:48,196 --> 00:20:49,280
[groans]
405
00:20:49,281 --> 00:20:50,899
I didn't hear any shot.
406
00:20:50,899 --> 00:20:53,618
He must have used a silencer.
407
00:20:53,619 --> 00:20:55,237
[groans]
408
00:20:55,237 --> 00:20:58,490
Ed, you're bleeding.
409
00:20:58,490 --> 00:21:00,124
I'll wipe it off for you.
410
00:21:00,125 --> 00:21:02,827
No, don't touch it. It hurts.
411
00:21:02,828 --> 00:21:07,716
Ed, I should never
have brought you here.
412
00:21:07,716 --> 00:21:09,884
I forgive you, Wilbur.
413
00:21:09,885 --> 00:21:13,138
Oh, it's getting dark.
414
00:21:13,138 --> 00:21:14,756
Come on back.
415
00:21:14,756 --> 00:21:16,924
We came up here to shoot ducks,
remember? What--
416
00:21:18,560 --> 00:21:20,178
My.
417
00:21:20,178 --> 00:21:22,346
W-Well, what's the matter?
418
00:21:22,347 --> 00:21:25,066
Some careless hunter shot Ed.
419
00:21:25,067 --> 00:21:27,769
Oh, that's too bad.
420
00:21:27,769 --> 00:21:29,937
Oh, is there anything I can do?
421
00:21:29,938 --> 00:21:32,106
No, I don't think so.
422
00:21:32,107 --> 00:21:33,741
Yes, there is.
423
00:21:35,911 --> 00:21:38,613
Take my gun and you can
throw it in the lake.
424
00:21:38,613 --> 00:21:41,332
I'm never going hunting again.
425
00:21:41,333 --> 00:21:43,501
All right, Wilbur.
426
00:21:43,502 --> 00:21:45,120
And throw yours in, too.
427
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:46,204
Oh, no, wait a minute.
428
00:21:46,204 --> 00:21:49,457
My-- M-M-My gun cost $375.
429
00:21:49,458 --> 00:21:52,711
Rog, if you don't
throw that gun in the lake,
430
00:21:52,711 --> 00:21:54,345
I'll never speak to you again.
431
00:21:58,133 --> 00:21:59,217
Fine.
432
00:22:06,808 --> 00:22:08,442
Oh.
433
00:22:08,443 --> 00:22:10,061
Ed.
434
00:22:10,062 --> 00:22:12,230
Ed, how do you feel?
435
00:22:12,230 --> 00:22:15,483
Getting weaker.
436
00:22:15,484 --> 00:22:17,118
Oh, no wonder.
437
00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:18,203
[groans]
438
00:22:18,203 --> 00:22:20,905
You're losing a lot of catsup.
439
00:22:23,625 --> 00:22:24,709
Catsup?
440
00:22:24,710 --> 00:22:27,963
Wilbur, yell, but don't hit.
441
00:22:27,963 --> 00:22:30,665
Oh, oh, Ed.
442
00:22:30,665 --> 00:22:32,299
Oh, I had a--
443
00:22:32,300 --> 00:22:34,468
I'm just relieved
that you're all right.
444
00:22:34,469 --> 00:22:36,087
[laughs]
445
00:22:36,088 --> 00:22:38,807
Oh, boy. I mean, this could've
happened, you know.
446
00:22:40,425 --> 00:22:42,059
Oh, Ed.
447
00:22:43,145 --> 00:22:46,932
Oh, believe me.
I really learned my lesson.
448
00:22:46,932 --> 00:22:50,185
Okay, Ed,
you can stand up now.
449
00:22:50,185 --> 00:22:51,269
[grunts]
450
00:22:52,354 --> 00:22:53,438
[grunts]
451
00:22:54,523 --> 00:22:56,157
Oh, Ed.
452
00:22:56,158 --> 00:22:59,411
Oh, you're just going to take it
easy for the next few days.
453
00:22:59,411 --> 00:23:02,113
Eating, sleeping,
and having a ball.
454
00:23:02,114 --> 00:23:03,198
[chuckles]
455
00:23:04,282 --> 00:23:05,366
Carol?
456
00:23:06,451 --> 00:23:08,085
Carol?
457
00:23:08,086 --> 00:23:09,704
What is it, honey?
458
00:23:09,704 --> 00:23:11,338
My hunting days are over.
459
00:23:11,339 --> 00:23:14,041
Wilbur, do you mean that?
460
00:23:14,042 --> 00:23:16,210
Roger and I have thrown
our guns away.
461
00:23:17,846 --> 00:23:21,633
Oh, honey, I'm so glad.
462
00:23:21,633 --> 00:23:24,352
Well, I threw them
in the deepest part of the lake.
463
00:23:26,521 --> 00:23:29,223
What is that animal
doing on its feet?
464
00:23:29,224 --> 00:23:31,943
Wilbur, I-- I don't understand.
465
00:23:31,943 --> 00:23:33,561
I just saw him.
He was lying down.
466
00:23:33,562 --> 00:23:35,196
There was blood all--
467
00:23:35,197 --> 00:23:35,730
What happened?
468
00:23:38,450 --> 00:23:41,152
Roger, when you witness
a miracle,
469
00:23:41,153 --> 00:23:44,406
you don't question it.
You just accept it.
470
00:23:56,351 --> 00:23:57,969
Another carrot, Ed?
471
00:23:57,969 --> 00:24:00,688
Just leave it there, Wilbur.
472
00:24:00,689 --> 00:24:02,857
Sorry I had to pull
that trick on you.
473
00:24:02,858 --> 00:24:04,476
I was on to you
from the start.
474
00:24:04,476 --> 00:24:06,110
You never scared me.
475
00:24:06,111 --> 00:24:08,279
Well, you scared me.
476
00:24:08,280 --> 00:24:12,067
You were crying so hard
I thought I was really dying.
477
00:24:12,067 --> 00:24:14,235
Well, I hope
this proves to you, Ed,
478
00:24:14,236 --> 00:24:15,320
that horoscopes
don't mean a thing.
479
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:16,404
That's right.
480
00:24:16,404 --> 00:24:18,572
And you'll never be
superstitious again?
481
00:24:18,573 --> 00:24:20,741
Never.
482
00:24:20,742 --> 00:24:21,826
Ed, I don't know
what you're worried about.
483
00:24:21,827 --> 00:24:24,546
You're going to have
a long and healthy life.
484
00:24:24,546 --> 00:24:26,164
You betcha.
485
00:24:28,884 --> 00:24:29,968
What was that?
486
00:24:29,968 --> 00:24:31,586
I knocked on wood.
487
00:24:31,586 --> 00:24:33,754
I'm not taking any chances.
488
00:24:43,515 --> 00:24:45,683
♪ A horse is a horse,of course, of course ♪
489
00:24:45,684 --> 00:24:47,852
♪ And no one can talkto a horse, of course ♪
490
00:24:47,853 --> 00:24:50,021
♪ That is, of course,unless the horse ♪
491
00:24:50,021 --> 00:24:52,189
♪ Is the famous Mister Ed ♪
492
00:24:52,190 --> 00:24:53,824
♪ Go right to the sourceand ask the horse ♪
493
00:24:53,825 --> 00:24:54,909
♪ He'll give youthe answer ♪
494
00:24:54,910 --> 00:24:56,528
♪ That you'll endorse ♪
495
00:24:56,528 --> 00:24:58,696
♪ He's alwayson a steady course ♪
496
00:24:58,697 --> 00:25:00,865
♪ Talk to Mister Ed ♪
497
00:25:00,866 --> 00:25:02,500
♪ People yakkity-yaka streak ♪
498
00:25:02,501 --> 00:25:04,669
♪ And wasteyour time of day ♪
499
00:25:04,669 --> 00:25:06,837
♪ But Mister Edwill never speak ♪
500
00:25:06,838 --> 00:25:09,006
♪ Unless he hassomething to say ♪
501
00:25:09,007 --> 00:25:11,175
♪ A horse is a horse,of course, of course ♪
502
00:25:11,176 --> 00:25:13,344
♪ And this one will talktill his voice is hoarse ♪
503
00:25:13,345 --> 00:25:16,047
♪ You never heardof a talking horse? ♪
504
00:25:17,132 --> 00:25:19,851
♪ Well, listen to this ♪
505
00:25:19,851 --> 00:25:23,104
[Mister Ed]
♪ I am Mister Ed ♪
506
00:25:23,104 --> 00:25:25,806
Closed-Captioned By
J.R. Media Services, Inc. Burbank, CA
507
00:25:27,976 --> 00:25:30,144
[Man]This has been a Filmwaystelevision presentation.
36054
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