Original subtitles

[sighs]

You want to talk about it? - No.

- Are you sure?

- Are you fucking deaf? I said I don't want to talk about it.

Okay? I don't want to talk about it.

- Barbara, fuck that guy. You're beautiful.

- I'm not. You heard him. I'm disgusting,

and I'm useless. - No, you're not.

- Yes, I am.

I'm a monster.

- You're a monster? Oh, God. No-- Ugh. Look at me.

- So you have a little cellulite, like, whatever.

So much better than having

fucking melty fingers and melty toes.

- I'm too ugly to be sexually harassed

by the agent who was fired for sexual harassment.

- Okay, I just said that to make you feel bad about yourself.

I'm sure, like, he just respected you as a writer.

- No, I'm, like, a fucking terrible writer.

- No, I'm sure you're a great writer.

- No, I'm not. Trust me.

- Okay, well, I'd rather be a terrible writer

than a useless sex doll.

- Barbara, you're being so hard on yourself.

Like, why do you think I just spent

all that money to get you fixed?

- You were just trying to save your own ass.

- No, I wanted to keep you 'cause I fucking like you, man.

- You do?

- Yeah.

We got to go

'cause, you know, we still need to beat Dan home.

- We should go. - Okay.

- Actually,

Cody, would you mind if I just had a moment

to, like, compose myself?

- Sure, yeah.

- Alone?

- Okay.

Sure. - Thanks, girl.

- Goddamn it.

- Okay, I'm ready!

-Okay, let's do it.

- Come on. - [car door shuts]

- [sighs]

- Hey, phone... - [phone chimes]

- ...play "Doll Parts" by Hole. - [phone chimes]

♪ I am ♪

♪ Doll eyes ♪

♪ Doll mouth ♪

♪ Doll legs ♪

- [Cody singing along]: ♪ I am ♪

♪ Doll arms ♪

♪ Big veins, dog bait ♪

♪ Yeah, they really want you ♪

♪ They really want you ♪

♪ They really do ♪

♪ Yeah, they really want you ♪

♪ They really want you, and I do, too ♪

♪ I want to be ♪

♪ The girl with the most cake ♪

♪ I love him so much ♪

♪ It just turns to hate ♪

♪ I fake it so real ♪

♪ I am beyond fake ♪

[laughs]

♪ And someday ♪

♪ You will ache like I ache ♪

Here we go!

♪ And someday you will ache like I ache ♪

♪ And someday ♪

♪ You will ache like I ache ♪

♪ Someday you will ache like I ache ♪

♪ Someday ♪

♪ You will ache like I ache. ♪

[gasps]

Oh, fuck. - Uh-oh.

Ow! - DAN: Babe,

you okay?

I came home as soon as I got your text.

- What text?

- Uh, "911. Come home ASAP. Emergency, hunk."

- Oh, you little shit. - Oopsie.

- What's going on?

- Um...

- What's wrong with you?

BARBARA: She's crazy, Dan, I tried to tell her.

- So much.

DAN: I have a sex doll.

You said it didn't bother you.

I asked you to respect my privacy,

that I didn't want you to look at it, and you agreed to that.

You didn't have to, but you agreed to that.

And now it's sitting in your fucking car. - Yeah.

- How can I ever trust you again?

- Uh, yeah, I know, I know,

and, um, there's nothing I can say to fix this,

so I'm just gonna go inside, and I'll grab my stuff,

and then I'm gonna leave you alone, and I'm sorry,

I just needed to, like, see her.

- Why? - Um...

I don't know. [chuckles]

Um, 'cause I'm, like, a crazy psycho, I guess.

Um, and I just, like, needed to know,

like, what you wanted or what... I...

And I looked and I broke her,

and then I, like, googled a place to get her fixed,

and I thought I could beat you home, but,

like, subconsciously, obviously,

I wanted to get caught because I texted you, so,

uh, I don't know. I'm the worst, and I'm a psycho,

and I probably shouldn't be with you,

and I shouldn't be with anybody, so I'll just leave,

and you guys will be, like, great together. It'll be great.

- No, it-- Whoa. Hey...

You went through all that trouble to get it fixed?

- Yeah. Well, I broke her, so... - Hey.

That thing's just a masturbation tool.

I don't give a shit about it.

I care about you.

You're my baby, Bean.

You're the best girlfriend in the whole world,

and I can never lose you.

- What are you doing?

- What I should've done a long time ago.

["Chloe Dancer/Crown of Thorns" by Mother Love Bone playing]

♪ Chloe don't know better ♪

♪ Chloe's just like me, only beautiful... ♪

- Dan, no. No, no, no, you're just really confused.

You're really confused, and this is not

how this is supposed to go. - No more lies.

- No more lies.

- Wait, Codes, don't go!

This is exactly what the patriarchy wants,

don't you get it? - We could get chili from that one place.

- You can't eat chili. It's got beans in it, and you're a bean.

- I'm a canni-bean!

- You guys sound like fucking idiots!

This isn't over!