Original subtitles

[Narrator] He is the star porn writer of North India.

The Sherlock Holmes of sex, Bad Boy.

8000 copies sold already?

What a writer! I had goose bumps while reading.

[Bhasskar] I am Bhasskar Tripathi. I am a Brahmin.

I am from Allahbad, preparing for UPSC here.

This is Banaras.

Every person here is a walking atom bomb.

I am Vidhi Pandey.

I have an hour until my class.

Rascal!

You're angry because the kid is going places

and you're a 27-year-old virgin.

I am ready.

You're a lowlife.

That's why you'll die a virgin.

I, Bhasskar Tripathi, take a vow

I will teach Vidhi Pandey a lesson

and lose my virginity in ten days.

[Sanskrit chants]

[chanting]

Lord Shiva.

- Lord Shiva? - You're here, Lord?

Lord Shiva is abstract. I am mortal.

It's me, Maharaj.

Have you got his horoscope?

Yes, horoscope, ration card, pan card, Aadhar card, passport.

Everything.

Please say something about Bhasskar's virginity, if you can...

Up till now his life period...

was good.

Bad time has begun now.

[Man 1] She has arrived.

[Thundering & Raining]

[Thundering]

Please reveal something about her.

She is the one,

who illuminates everything on her arrival.

The one,

whose arrival was awaited...

for 27 years.

[Thundering]

[Temple Bell]

[Narrator] NASA, Black hole, Area 51.

Bermuda Triangle. Bhangarh Fort and girls' hotel.

These are considered as the most mysterious places in the world.

Everybody wants to know about them.

But are only able to assume about it.

This is Ahilyabai Girls Hostel.

[Narrator] Want to know, how do they spend their free time?

And the most important question.

How does she satisfy her soul?

[Phone ringing]

Yes, Vinay. Tell me.

I am not angry with you.

Look, the exciting hormones within you.

I can understand.

But you have to understand too.

My family's honour is more important than your hormones.

I don't want to have sex with you.

Hang up now.

I am very busy.

[Narrator] According to a survey, a woman,

compared to a man takes 40-50% more time to climax.

So obviously like man, they will not be satisfied...

...by 1.5 GB per day.

Like the rest of India, it is only the Bad Boy,

who can give them an orgasm.

Everyone is reading it.

The introverts are reading it secretly.

And those who have admitted their sexuality

are reading it openly.

I plucked fresh sugar canes from the fields.

They were so sweet.

The tenant squeezed me entirely.

[Narrator] But there was someone,

who was far away from the world of Bad Boy.

Who wanted, to do something in life.

Yes, Ayushi.

[Pakhi] But I have to take care of the one, who makes our projects.

Please arrange for the advance,

or else it will not be possible for me.

Okay fine, bye.

Sister, I am unable to solve this equation.

Solve it by the quadratic equation.

The equation which couldn't be solved by anyone in the world.

Dharacharya had solved it in the 10th century itself.

Pakhi. I want the notes for the semester.

250. Give the change for 50.

I am broke. I broke up with Anurag.

Radhika, this is always your excuse. Give me 50 more.

Please take 200 now.

Hurry up Radhika, the warden is going to raid.

Our Bad Boy will be caught. Hurry up.

Bad Boy in girls' hostel?

Have to check each and every corner.

What's this? Is this a women's concert?

Why aren't you both not in your rooms?

They had come to clear their doubts, for the ongoing exams.

They are just studying, nothing else.

Is it?

She is from Electrical, they both are from Arts

and you are a commerce student.

Then which doubts are you clearing?

I very well know, what's happening here.

Should I help you?

Madam, there is nothing here.

Go, check in 55.

And you both get back to your rooms.

Pakhi, you don't care about anything.

You have become totally independent.

Do you have a boyfriend?

No, Seema Ma'am. I don't get time from studying.

Let's hear about you.

You are here in Banaras, and he is at Hardoi.

How do you manage?

Madam. Madam. Bad Boy found in room 55.

[Miss Seema] Let's go.

Who the hell is Bad Boy?

[Song playing on radio]

Bhasskar, wake up.

[Vidhi] Bhasskar, wake up.

I am leaving Banaras, and you are sleeping?

- What? - Go to sleep, I am leaving.

Hey, sit down. Why are you stomping?

Where are you going? What happened?

What I feared, has happened.

UPSC results are out.

Hmm, I couldn't crack it.

- Did you? - What do you mean?

[Vidhi] I was having a breakup with you, during the exams.

How could I have cracked it? Again, I missed it.

So, why are you sad? It was just UPSC.

Neither you nor I cracked it. We are same.

Okay, listen. Sit down.

I will make a steaming cup of tea, with less sugar, for you.

Your favourite.

[Cupboard closes]

[Girl 1] Sis, the warden is scolding the girls of room 55.

Rubbish, what is the use of confiscating the books?

Girls will buy them again.

No, there is no new stock of Bad Boy.

Who the hell is Bad Boy?

He is a writer.

His books make you experience it.

Wonder, where is he! He has vanished.

I think he must have died while having sex.

How do you know, he died while having sex?

Obviously, he must be dead.

He would have written if he was alive.

Tell me, who wouldn't like to earn from home?

He is in demand?

Absolutely. It is all sold out.

5 books found in one room of a hostel.

If 1 is for 40...

Can you arrange one book for me?

What is brewing in your mind?

Demand and supply.

Monica is going around with the xerox guy.

Can get it from her.

- Excellent then. - [Girl 1] Okay.

[Both Giggling]

[Narrator] So, as I said.

Listen. Keep all these books in the store room.

And be very careful.

[Narrator] Everyone reads it, but in their own way.

Whole India was excited to read Bad Boy.

But Bad Boy didn't have time to write the book.

He was busy making tea.

Fine, at least you learnt to make tea, by being with me.

Not only tea, I have learnt a lot from you.

What else have you learnt?

This.

I learnt the way to make love. I learnt it from you.

Tripathi, stop promoting your book everywhere.

Did you not learn anything worthwhile?

Yes, I have learnt. I learnt from you.

How to be a better human.

And I learnt, how to answer immediately.

Stop this nonsense.

I have already lost it.

And you are irritating me more.

- You are useless. I am going. - Hey...

Hey, where are you going?

Sit down. Always getting angry.

I haven't told you about the amazing thing that you have taught me.

I have learnt from you.

Hollywood style kiss.

[Both chuckle]

Hollywood style kiss?

- What's that? - It is like magnet.

Like magnet? I didn't get it.

Really?

So, should I explain to you in theory or practical?

[Music playing]

[Phone ringing]

Papa is calling.

But why now?

Keep quiet. Calm down.

Chin up. A bit more. Stay like this.

Vidhi dear, how are you?

I am fine, what about you?

I am absolutely fine.

UPSC results are out. You must have checked it.

- Yes, Papa. - Don't worry, dear.

It's okay if you didn't crack it.

Kailash.

Shuklaji's son. He has passed.

So, if you want, should I send the marriage proposal?

No, not at all. What's the hurry?

Why shouldn't you hurry, dear?

You had promised me.

If you didn't clear the UPSC exams,

you would marry the boy of my choice.

Don't you remember?

The vegetable seller is here. Better catch him.

[Vidhi] Talk to you later okay?

[Vidhi's father] Hey.

What's this? You promised that to Papa?

Vidhi. Vidhi.

Continue what you were doing.

No, not that way.

Why, you don't want to do it now?

You want to remain a virgin all your life?

What has this to do with virginity?

Tripathi, everything is all about virginity.

That day when we were doing it, the fan fell on your back.

[Vidhi] I asked you to get it fixed.

But you never listen to me.

When you got hurt, the doctor advised you bed rest.

Couldn't do it for 3 months.

Then the f***er pundit advised me to abstain from it.

To crack UPSC.

Rubbish, nothing happened and no action for another 30 more days.

Finally, when we were trying to do something.

Was getting in the mood. Then you don't want to do it?

What should I do Bhasskar? This house is jinxed.

Sex is impossible here.

Vidhi.

[Vidhi] Listen, reminding you, Dipti has shifted after her wedding.

I live alone.

Will inform you the time, come over.

[Typing]

[Thundering]

[Man 1] Excuse me.

[Raining]

I guess, even your flight like mine...

[Whistles]

Isn't going to fly today.

Flights will keep flying.

But to whom I want to go...

wonder if he really wants to call me or not.

Was waiting for his call.

In that case, I have a very good idea.

There is a wonderful hotel nearby.

We can go there and wait for a while.

If you get the call fine. Or else...

I am available.

You are joking?

No...

this is not a joke.

I repeat, this is not a joke.

[Thundering]

[Pakhi] Even I didn't want him to joke.

I would never even glance at the Romeos of the streets.

But he did not look like one. Impossible.

He was different. But...

Shall we?

[Pakhi] Honestly, I couldn't believe myself.

That I had consented to go to a hotel room with a stranger.

Sister, Monica's xerox guy, knows a publisher.

- Really? - Yes.

[Rohan] Did a bird drop?

I don't know.

Bro.

Sex is like the automatic car.

You just need to press the accelerator.

Then the car will zoom without breaks.

Vidhi has called you home willingly.

So, she is the driver.

You just trust her and enjoy the journey as a responsible passenger.

Bro.

[Glass clinking]

It will be done.

Yes, it will be done.

I am a bit nervous as I am doing it for the first time.

I am feeling restless.

Bro, I had once flirted with a Bengali girl called Nisha Patra.

- So. - I had heard Bengali girls desire a lot.

I was worried whether I would be able to satisfy her or not.

Okay, then what did you do?

- Role play. - Role play?

Honestly bro, there is no other way to distract.

Just imbibe any strong character.

Which one were you?

Me?

I was the sulking alcoholic of Devadas.

Wore a kurta and a dhoti. Parted my hair from the middle.

A bottle in my hand and went to her.

- Did it work? - Work?

She still calls me Deva.

- [Rohan Giggling] - Bloody flirt. Rubbish.

You are a writer.

Must have lived so many characters in your head.

Do you have any favourite? Erotic?

There is someone.

The book that I had written. The Hearty Cop.

I love the cop.

[Knocking door]

The two-star Hearty Cop, reporting from police station, sir.

Wow, you are not as foolish as I assumed you to be.

Should I do it?

Should I serve you tea?

[Rohan giggling]

[Pakhi] Are you Tiwari?

Yes, I am Mr. Tiwari. Tell me.

I wanted to ask, if you will print the book.

Who am I to print the books?

[Tiwari] I have the business of ink.

The ink used to print the tonsure ceremony of a kid.

Is also used to print the death of someone.

So, you will print the book?

- What book is it? - How does it matter to you?

You just tell me, how much for a page?

I want to print 500.

[Tiwari] This is not the way.

Elections are commencing. There is a code of conduct.

If after printing, a situation of anarchy arises.

Then the government will accuse me.

Mr. Tiwari...

it is just Hindi fiction.

Who will read Hindi fiction?

Go away, don't waste my time.

[Pakhi reading] As soon as I entered, I looked all around the room.

Dev was throwing all my clothes one by one.

And I was unable to say a word.

[Song playing]

[Pakhi] I had nothing left except to gasp.

Dev laid me on the bed and started taking off his clothes.

They way he was kissing my body, increased my heart beats.

Nothing else mattered to me. I attacked him.

To hell with coyness and honour.

We both were travellers of a night.

Today was our night.

And I was going to do everything...

which the morning sun could never taunt me off.

[Tiwari] Oh my. Enough. Stop it.

I understand your book.

You book will not create anarchy but self-dependence.

It will not cause any damage to our country.

Leave it here, I will print it.

- I don't have that much time. - Then?

Print right now.

Okay bye.

- Will you go like this? - Then how?

Roll up your sleeves.

It doesn't look nice.

Why?

Open the buttons.

Role play means living the character.

I am just a cop not a mafia.

A cop too has his own attitude.

- Hey... - [Rohan] This, in style.

Bro, don't worry.

Imagine a porn film is on. Adult.

Aren't you talking too much?

Want to make a porn film here?

Bro, I got a bit carried away thinking...

you are going to do it today.

- Broaden your shoulders. - Yes.

- Chin up, like this. - Yes.

- Brag a lot. - Okay.

- I am going. - Okay go.

- Should I give you something more? - What?

Oh dude.

You want me to be Salman Khan?

- Create a storm, bro. - Fine.

- I am going. - Where are you going?

- Park the bike. - So, should I go walking?

Will I walk back?

Park the bike.

[Knocking the door]

[mouthing] Papa...

- Um... - [Vidhi's father] Yes?

Is this Pakkad Pandey's house?

There isn't any Pakkad Pandey living here.

I have a friend.

We have a theatre company. We are rehearsing a play.

[Vidhi's father] There isn't any Pakkad Pandey living here.

Thank you.

[Bhasskar] Pakkad Pandey, where are you?

Is he mad?

I don't know.

Let's go.

[Batuknath] Wow, writer.

Bloody, I gave you a break.

Taught you to earn by writing.

I made you the brand of Bad Boy in the whole of North India.

And you did this to me?

Listen. I am already very irritated.

I don't have time to answer your useless questions.

Don't have time for useless questions?

But you have time to get Bad Boy printed from another publisher.

What nonsense are you talking? What have I written?

And who is this publisher?

What have you written? Look at this.

Is selling in the market since afternoon.

Bad Boy?

It is so sad, that you never wrote like this for me.

But you became the Shakespeare of sex,

since you got another publisher.

Stop this nonsense. From where did you buy this?

- On the Ghats. - Take me there, let me check.

- Come. - Come.

[Boy 1] Religious comic.

Show me which religious comic you are selling? Show me.

I am not doing anything wrong. Just selling books.

From where did you get these books?

I bought them from the whole sellers.

Who is the new whole seller? Come here.

Look at him. Recognize him?

His name is Batuknath. Get it?

He is the boss for publication in Banaras.

[Bhasskar] He is the only proprietor of Bad Boy.

Nobody can dare publish anything without him.

So, from where did this new publisher come from?

Do you know, he is the real Bad Boy himself?

From which new whole seller did you buy the new Bad Boy?

Come with me. I will deal with you.

Sorry.

I am a mere college student.

[Boy 1] I sell books for pocket money.

I have no interest in selling filth.

I swear on Mother Ganga.

Hold. Leave.

Listen. Come here.

If you ever call my book filthy again will push the stick up you.

Get lost.

See that? I told you. Don't believe me.

[Pakhi] Finally, I came to know, who the real Bad Boy is.