Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:01:18,083 --> 00:01:19,458
Why isn't she here?
2
00:01:19,625 --> 00:01:21,375
Hurry up!
3
00:01:27,625 --> 00:01:28,792
Unicorn
4
00:01:29,333 --> 00:01:30,750
Your Majesty.
5
00:01:31,417 --> 00:01:33,208
Why isn't she ready yet?
6
00:01:48,125 --> 00:01:51,125
Great move, Your Majesty.
7
00:01:51,458 --> 00:01:54,625
Come and help.
8
00:01:56,458 --> 00:01:58,958
Grab the chicken...come on...
9
00:02:03,208 --> 00:02:04,708
Madam is here.
10
00:02:04,958 --> 00:02:06,833
Madam is here.
11
00:02:07,083 --> 00:02:08,333
So finally she has come.
12
00:02:09,708 --> 00:02:12,417
Good evening, Your Majesty.
13
00:02:12,583 --> 00:02:15,042
I have been waiting for you for a long time.
14
00:02:21,250 --> 00:02:24,625
Honey, shouldn't you shave your face?
15
00:02:24,792 --> 00:02:27,917
Your beard hurts me.
16
00:02:28,375 --> 00:02:29,917
I did shave it this morning,
17
00:02:30,125 --> 00:02:31,792
but as Your Majesty has noticed,
it has grown back.
18
00:02:32,042 --> 00:02:34,750
What should we do?
19
00:02:35,583 --> 00:02:37,792
Well...I got a beard too.
20
00:02:37,958 --> 00:02:40,875
It's a tie then.
21
00:02:41,042 --> 00:02:43,583
Yes, Your Majesty.
Let's go to the bedroom.
22
00:02:45,458 --> 00:02:47,458
There are so many beautiful concubines
in the palace.
23
00:02:47,708 --> 00:02:51,833
Why does His Majesty always choose
the ugly Madam?
24
00:02:52,042 --> 00:02:55,875
The Empress chooses her for His Majesty.
25
00:02:56,083 --> 00:02:59,958
So His Majesty only knows two women.
26
00:03:00,208 --> 00:03:05,292
And the Empress would be the most beautiful one.
27
00:03:10,375 --> 00:03:14,500
Your Highness,
the magic mirror from Japan has arrived.
28
00:03:16,042 --> 00:03:17,833
Ha...
29
00:03:29,333 --> 00:03:32,750
Honey, why do you always eat first?
30
00:03:33,042 --> 00:03:34,958
Your Majesty, don't be mad at me.
31
00:03:35,417 --> 00:03:36,917
I'll chop off your head, bastard.
32
00:03:37,750 --> 00:03:41,750
Royal Secret Guards, help!
33
00:03:42,458 --> 00:03:43,917
Royal Secret Guards are here.
34
00:03:46,375 --> 00:03:47,458
Royal Dragon
35
00:03:47,625 --> 00:03:48,542
Royal Rabbit
36
00:03:49,167 --> 00:03:50,250
Royal Snake
37
00:03:50,583 --> 00:03:51,542
Royal Tiger
38
00:05:18,333 --> 00:05:19,708
Who send you here?
39
00:05:38,083 --> 00:05:39,083
Go!
40
00:05:40,250 --> 00:05:42,083
See, my Royal Secret Guards...
41
00:05:42,292 --> 00:05:47,333
protect me 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
42
00:05:47,750 --> 00:05:49,583
Are you sure?
43
00:05:49,958 --> 00:05:51,250
What did you say?
44
00:05:51,500 --> 00:05:53,333
Japanese.
45
00:05:53,542 --> 00:05:55,458
How come you can speak Japanese?
46
00:05:56,250 --> 00:05:57,833
Because...
47
00:06:00,458 --> 00:06:01,708
Help!
48
00:06:01,958 --> 00:06:03,625
All your Royal Secret Guards are gone.
49
00:06:03,958 --> 00:06:04,958
Wrong.
50
00:06:05,833 --> 00:06:07,375
There is one left.
51
00:06:08,500 --> 00:06:09,625
Help!
52
00:06:09,833 --> 00:06:10,500
Don't worry, Your Majesty.
53
00:06:10,750 --> 00:06:13,208
I am coming.
54
00:06:28,292 --> 00:06:29,167
What is this?
55
00:06:29,375 --> 00:06:31,542
It's the Golden Lock, my new invention.
56
00:06:31,708 --> 00:06:33,500
-Beat him up... -Yes, Your Majesty.
57
00:06:33,708 --> 00:06:35,333
As a Royal Secret Guard,
58
00:06:35,583 --> 00:06:37,167
I am now putting you under arrest.
59
00:06:37,458 --> 00:06:39,292
You have the right to remain silent,
but whatever you say...
60
00:06:39,583 --> 00:06:42,167
will be used as evidence in court.
61
00:06:51,333 --> 00:06:53,208
What is this then?
62
00:06:53,375 --> 00:06:54,625
That's our famous...
63
00:06:54,833 --> 00:06:56,125
...human shield.
64
00:06:56,417 --> 00:06:59,708
We enjoyed putting it in public toilets
to scare people.
65
00:07:00,083 --> 00:07:01,208
It can be used as a weapon, too.
66
00:07:08,583 --> 00:07:10,750
I am going to get him, Your Majesty.
67
00:07:10,958 --> 00:07:14,125
Madam, this magic mirror
can answer any question you ask of it.
68
00:07:14,333 --> 00:07:18,417
Magic mirror, tell me who is the most
beautiful woman in the world?
69
00:07:18,625 --> 00:07:22,083
Your Highness, it's you of course.
70
00:07:22,458 --> 00:07:23,708
Really?
71
00:07:28,167 --> 00:07:29,542
No. Just kidding.
72
00:07:29,917 --> 00:07:30,875
What did you say?
73
00:07:33,417 --> 00:07:35,125
Hit me? You wanna die?
74
00:07:35,333 --> 00:07:37,542
-What's up? -Robbery!
75
00:07:42,917 --> 00:07:45,292
MY goodness!
76
00:07:46,083 --> 00:07:47,958
Help!
77
00:07:59,708 --> 00:08:01,917
Sony for coming so late, Your Highness.
78
00:08:02,167 --> 00:08:04,333
Give him a beating.
79
00:08:06,417 --> 00:08:07,792
Let me.
80
00:08:08,917 --> 00:08:12,042
You bastard, you ruined everything.
81
00:08:14,625 --> 00:08:15,750
I am gonna beat you to death.
82
00:08:18,250 --> 00:08:20,042
How come you run so fast?
83
00:08:34,958 --> 00:08:37,500
It's high enough, I am gonna let go.
84
00:08:44,042 --> 00:08:45,167
Thanks.
85
00:08:45,417 --> 00:08:48,167
Royal Dog is really awesome,
Brother you are so cool.
86
00:08:49,875 --> 00:08:51,208
Be careful.
87
00:08:51,417 --> 00:08:52,750
I got it.
88
00:09:13,083 --> 00:09:15,375
You'll better disarm and surrender.
89
00:09:15,625 --> 00:09:17,292
Or I will use force.
90
00:09:21,625 --> 00:09:22,917
Asking for help?
91
00:09:36,625 --> 00:09:37,583
Again.
92
00:09:39,917 --> 00:09:42,917
Bastard, I need to use the cannon.
93
00:09:57,333 --> 00:09:59,042
Look.
94
00:10:19,917 --> 00:10:23,250
Our warriors died for our country.
95
00:10:25,833 --> 00:10:27,250
Eternal umbrella!
96
00:10:27,917 --> 00:10:29,750
Not dead yet.
97
00:10:33,583 --> 00:10:34,958
Hi!
98
00:10:40,208 --> 00:10:42,042
Royal Secret Guards...
99
00:10:42,292 --> 00:10:46,250
love to drink Girlie's Red Wine.
100
00:10:47,333 --> 00:10:49,083
Girlie's Red Wine? What is the matter?
101
00:10:49,375 --> 00:10:50,625
Your Majesty, Girlie's Red...
102
00:10:50,833 --> 00:10:53,250
is the company which sponsors
Royal Dog's scientific research.
103
00:10:53,458 --> 00:10:56,250
The Eternal umbrella is made with their money.
104
00:10:56,500 --> 00:10:59,208
I hate product placements in movies.
105
00:10:59,417 --> 00:11:00,125
Execute them!
106
00:11:00,292 --> 00:11:02,250
Yes. Your Majesty!
107
00:11:07,417 --> 00:11:08,833
Royal Rat
108
00:11:09,208 --> 00:11:10,500
Your Majesty.
109
00:11:13,375 --> 00:11:14,958
Your Majesty wants to know...
110
00:11:15,250 --> 00:11:18,250
where did you go last night?
111
00:11:18,458 --> 00:11:20,625
I...
112
00:11:21,125 --> 00:11:22,458
Royal Rat.
113
00:11:22,625 --> 00:11:26,792
You have been practicing
the "Mighty Iron Body" kung fu, right?
114
00:11:26,958 --> 00:11:29,583
In case His Majesty is under attack,
115
00:11:29,750 --> 00:11:33,125
then you must use your Mighty Iron Body
to shield His Majesty!
116
00:11:33,583 --> 00:11:36,958
Last night, you were still practicing,
117
00:11:37,167 --> 00:11:38,875
so you didn't shield His Majesty, right?
118
00:11:39,500 --> 00:11:40,625
Yes, Your Majesty.
119
00:11:40,792 --> 00:11:44,292
I guess that he went to the brothel last night
instead of practicing kung fu.
120
00:11:44,542 --> 00:11:47,792
Yeah, why have they got clouds over their heads?
121
00:11:49,833 --> 00:11:52,375
Come on, let's drink...
122
00:11:52,625 --> 00:11:55,625
Royal Rat has been such a loyal servant.
123
00:11:55,875 --> 00:11:59,625
You will be rewarded
with a thousand taels of gold,
124
00:12:00,125 --> 00:12:01,250
500 taels should be enough.
125
00:12:02,792 --> 00:12:06,042
Your Majesty, the other 500 taels,
how about split it among us...
126
00:12:06,208 --> 00:12:07,458
as our reward?
127
00:12:07,625 --> 00:12:10,625
Last night, Royal Dog and Royal Tiger
had worked hard to protect His Majesty.
128
00:12:10,917 --> 00:12:14,042
You two tell me how the money should be divided.
129
00:12:14,250 --> 00:12:16,917
I just want to show Your Majesty
my new invention.
130
00:12:17,625 --> 00:12:18,750
Another new invention?
131
00:12:18,917 --> 00:12:21,417
Okay, show it to me.
132
00:12:21,542 --> 00:12:23,750
Your Majesty, this is my new invention...
133
00:12:24,042 --> 00:12:25,500
that will give you full protection.
134
00:12:25,750 --> 00:12:26,500
It's the impenetrable...
135
00:12:26,792 --> 00:12:28,292
Transformer armour.
136
00:12:31,292 --> 00:12:33,958
With this armour,
even if all 12 of us are killed,
137
00:12:34,375 --> 00:12:35,208
no one can...
138
00:12:35,542 --> 00:12:36,833
...hurt you.
139
00:12:37,208 --> 00:12:39,042
Really?
140
00:12:39,292 --> 00:12:40,333
Yes, Your Majesty.
141
00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:41,625
The beauty of this armour is that...
142
00:12:41,917 --> 00:12:43,417
even a person who doesn't know kung-fu,
143
00:12:43,625 --> 00:12:45,917
when he wears this,
he will become a great kung fu master.
144
00:12:46,167 --> 00:12:48,417
No one can stop him.
145
00:12:48,625 --> 00:12:50,958
Let me try this on...
146
00:12:53,458 --> 00:12:55,375
How does it feel, Your Majesty?
147
00:12:55,583 --> 00:12:58,417
It looks great, but it's too heavy.
148
00:12:58,625 --> 00:13:01,042
I can hardly walk at all. How could I fight?
149
00:13:01,250 --> 00:13:04,875
Your Majesty, with this armour,
you don't have to fight at all.
150
00:13:05,042 --> 00:13:08,167
What are you doing? Be respectful.
151
00:13:10,167 --> 00:13:12,167
Your Majesty, when you turn this spring,
152
00:13:12,458 --> 00:13:14,625
it will move on its own.
153
00:13:14,958 --> 00:13:16,208
How does it feel, Your Majesty?
154
00:13:16,375 --> 00:13:17,583
A bit itchy.
155
00:13:18,167 --> 00:13:20,917
Your Majesty, I will try harder.
156
00:13:24,083 --> 00:13:27,375
After wearing the helmet,
you are ready to fight, Your Majesty.
157
00:13:29,375 --> 00:13:30,875
Let's go.
158
00:13:38,458 --> 00:13:40,833
That's fun...
159
00:13:49,125 --> 00:13:51,875
Royal Dog, what other functions does it have?
160
00:13:52,042 --> 00:13:54,875
Press the right button and Your Majesty can fly.
161
00:13:59,833 --> 00:14:01,750
Fly...that's awesome.
162
00:14:12,292 --> 00:14:13,875
It works.
163
00:14:14,958 --> 00:14:19,292
Fly...
164
00:14:19,583 --> 00:14:22,625
How does he come down?
165
00:14:22,833 --> 00:14:27,500
Royal Dog, I felt dizzy. How can I come down?
166
00:14:27,792 --> 00:14:29,750
Well, to descend from the sky...
167
00:14:29,917 --> 00:14:32,333
I haven't figured that out yet, Your Majesty.
168
00:14:32,542 --> 00:14:35,792
Never mind, I guess Your Majesty
can bump against something and come down.
169
00:14:35,958 --> 00:14:38,875
You're dead, Royal Dog, as soon as I come down.
170
00:14:42,333 --> 00:14:43,875
Royal Dog is in big trouble this time.
171
00:14:44,083 --> 00:14:45,333
His Majesty is coming this way.
172
00:14:52,167 --> 00:14:53,250
What a narrow escape!
173
00:15:04,625 --> 00:15:06,250
Oh no...
174
00:15:10,792 --> 00:15:12,292
Oh my armour...
175
00:15:13,917 --> 00:15:15,792
Your Majesty, my brother is just self-indulgent.
176
00:15:15,958 --> 00:15:17,417
He doesn't mean to do you any harm.
177
00:15:17,625 --> 00:15:19,292
And my brother has always been a weakling.
178
00:15:19,542 --> 00:15:21,167
He will die if Your Majesty
keeps hitting him like that.
179
00:15:21,417 --> 00:15:23,542
Please pardon him, Your Majesty.
180
00:15:23,792 --> 00:15:25,333
His butt hurts, right?
181
00:15:25,750 --> 00:15:27,042
Flip him over.
182
00:15:27,542 --> 00:15:30,625
The 500 taels of gold reward
will be confiscated...
183
00:15:31,083 --> 00:15:33,708
and every one of you
will be deducted 3 months' salary too.
184
00:15:51,542 --> 00:15:54,667
Am I seeing ghosts?
185
00:16:01,625 --> 00:16:03,625
Don't frighten me!
186
00:16:03,708 --> 00:16:05,292
I am here.
187
00:16:07,750 --> 00:16:08,750
I don't mind you coming to see me,
188
00:16:08,958 --> 00:16:12,875
but why show up in the middle
of the night and scare the hell out of me?
189
00:16:13,542 --> 00:16:15,375
What are you doing, Faithfull?
190
00:16:15,625 --> 00:16:17,542
I come here to do your laundry.
191
00:16:20,125 --> 00:16:21,958
What laundry?
192
00:16:22,292 --> 00:16:26,625
You always let those punks do your laundry.
193
00:16:26,875 --> 00:16:28,458
How can they do it well?
194
00:16:28,625 --> 00:16:31,375
Although I am just your fiancee,
195
00:16:31,583 --> 00:16:33,333
I am willing to do your laundry.
196
00:16:33,625 --> 00:16:36,167
I have no objection
to your doing my laundry, just...
197
00:16:36,375 --> 00:16:38,833
your parents oppose our marriage.
198
00:16:39,042 --> 00:16:40,500
If I marry you,
199
00:16:40,708 --> 00:16:42,875
they will bring me trouble.
200
00:16:43,083 --> 00:16:44,958
I am not scared though.
201
00:16:47,958 --> 00:16:49,125
What is this smell?
202
00:16:49,250 --> 00:16:51,292
Tell me, are you having affairs with other girls?
203
00:16:53,958 --> 00:16:56,375
There are maids in the palace.
204
00:16:56,583 --> 00:16:58,292
It's common for those maids to...
205
00:16:58,542 --> 00:17:02,333
put on make-up, right?
206
00:17:04,333 --> 00:17:07,042
I like you because your thinking...
207
00:17:07,292 --> 00:17:10,125
is different from others. You are smart.
208
00:17:10,375 --> 00:17:13,625
A few days ago,
you beat the assassins with rockets,
209
00:17:13,875 --> 00:17:16,542
everyone in the market is talking about it.
210
00:17:17,500 --> 00:17:19,833
Faithfull, if you are done with the laundry,
211
00:17:20,042 --> 00:17:21,375
please go home.
212
00:17:21,625 --> 00:17:23,083
If your parents know you are here,
213
00:17:23,333 --> 00:17:25,292
they will rough me up.
214
00:17:25,542 --> 00:17:28,208
Don't be afraid, my kung-fu is better than them.
215
00:17:28,542 --> 00:17:29,625
I can protect you.
216
00:17:29,875 --> 00:17:30,625
Really?
217
00:17:30,750 --> 00:17:31,708
No way.
218
00:17:32,833 --> 00:17:33,917
See, a daughter will always put...
219
00:17:34,125 --> 00:17:37,333
her husband before her parents
after she gets married.
220
00:17:37,583 --> 00:17:39,958
Auntie, uncle, this is my place.
221
00:17:40,250 --> 00:17:41,500
This is not your place.
222
00:17:41,750 --> 00:17:42,917
Will you please knock before barging in?
223
00:17:43,125 --> 00:17:44,375
We're used to barge in like this. Right.
224
00:17:44,625 --> 00:17:47,042
Otherwise how can I find you
get naked and corrupt my daughter?
225
00:17:47,500 --> 00:17:49,083
How could you say that?
226
00:17:49,292 --> 00:17:51,958
It's your daughter who barged
in while I was bathing.
227
00:17:52,250 --> 00:17:53,500
Are you saying that she saw you naked...
228
00:17:53,750 --> 00:17:55,792
and she got horny and tried to rape you?
229
00:17:56,042 --> 00:17:57,708
Exactly.
230
00:17:58,458 --> 00:18:00,500
Mom and dad, are you done?
231
00:18:00,708 --> 00:18:03,542
You are still young.
I am worried that you'll be cheated.
232
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:06,792
We are already engaged since birth.
I don't mind being cheated.
233
00:18:06,958 --> 00:18:09,750
Baby, we won't force you to many him.
234
00:18:09,958 --> 00:18:11,500
But I want to marry him.
235
00:18:11,708 --> 00:18:14,042
People will say that we are too autocratic.
236
00:18:14,500 --> 00:18:16,417
Anyone who dares to say that, I will beat him up.
237
00:18:16,625 --> 00:18:18,125
The son of Master Yin is handsome.
238
00:18:18,333 --> 00:18:19,500
The son of General Hau is a nice fellow too.
239
00:18:19,708 --> 00:18:21,292
He's so damn rich.
240
00:18:21,500 --> 00:18:22,958
Look at him, he's as poor as a church mouse.
241
00:18:23,250 --> 00:18:25,625
He'll be a wretched fellow his whole life.
242
00:18:25,875 --> 00:18:28,042
Auntie, uncle, please mind your words.
243
00:18:28,250 --> 00:18:30,250
I say what I think. So what?
244
00:18:33,042 --> 00:18:34,792
Auntie, uncle,
please don't force me to fight against you.
245
00:18:34,958 --> 00:18:35,792
Hak!
246
00:18:35,958 --> 00:18:37,875
I am gonna beat you up, you punk...
247
00:18:38,042 --> 00:18:38,917
Come on.
248
00:18:39,125 --> 00:18:40,500
Let me go.
249
00:18:41,125 --> 00:18:43,250
You good for nothing punk.
We are here, how's that?
250
00:18:43,292 --> 00:18:44,750
Don't you dare stay here and not move.
251
00:18:44,958 --> 00:18:45,792
Okay, we won't move then.
252
00:18:46,125 --> 00:18:47,333
Whatever happens, you won't move.
253
00:18:47,625 --> 00:18:48,583
Of course.
254
00:18:48,917 --> 00:18:49,958
I won't move anyway.
255
00:18:50,375 --> 00:18:51,500
Just don't move then.
256
00:18:51,625 --> 00:18:53,917
Don't move! Let me tell you...
Okay, how's that?
257
00:18:54,125 --> 00:18:54,750
Really?
258
00:18:54,958 --> 00:18:57,750
If you guys don't move, I can't do anything.
259
00:19:04,750 --> 00:19:05,625
What are you doing?
260
00:19:05,792 --> 00:19:07,250
Come and take a look...
261
00:19:07,792 --> 00:19:08,792
This one is wonderful.
262
00:19:08,958 --> 00:19:11,542
Do you know the air we breathe
in are mostly useless gases,
263
00:19:11,750 --> 00:19:14,625
except one useful gas calls "oxygen".
264
00:19:14,833 --> 00:19:17,625
According to the Western scholars,
2 units of certain elements...
265
00:19:17,958 --> 00:19:20,250
together with 1 unit of this "oxygen"
will combine into water.
266
00:19:20,458 --> 00:19:22,375
Smell it.
267
00:19:25,167 --> 00:19:27,250
Do you smell that? Isn't it refreshing...
268
00:19:27,625 --> 00:19:28,750
Smell again, you will feel great.
269
00:19:28,958 --> 00:19:31,292
Yes, it feels great.
270
00:19:31,500 --> 00:19:35,333
You don't have to hit me though.
271
00:19:35,542 --> 00:19:37,958
The most wonderful thing is that...
272
00:19:38,375 --> 00:19:39,792
it will make the fire burn brighter.
273
00:19:40,042 --> 00:19:42,375
I am still working on it.
274
00:19:45,958 --> 00:19:47,167
Honey
275
00:19:49,125 --> 00:19:52,333
We are not kids anymore,
276
00:19:52,583 --> 00:19:53,625
should we...
277
00:19:53,792 --> 00:19:55,500
Faithfull, if you want to say anything,
278
00:19:55,708 --> 00:19:57,208
please write it down and put it there.
279
00:19:57,458 --> 00:19:59,375
I will read it after the experiment.
280
00:20:02,208 --> 00:20:03,333
Afew days ago, a friend of mine,
281
00:20:03,583 --> 00:20:06,708
brought me some liquid which can clean our hairs.
282
00:20:06,958 --> 00:20:09,750
I just can't use it without...
283
00:20:09,958 --> 00:20:11,958
understanding what it consists of. Right?
284
00:20:12,208 --> 00:20:13,958
If someone uses it and his hairs become dry or...
285
00:20:14,333 --> 00:20:15,542
oily, or he gets dandruff...
286
00:20:15,833 --> 00:20:17,958
I would blame myself also.
287
00:20:18,208 --> 00:20:19,542
But my hairs look like this...
288
00:20:19,708 --> 00:20:21,208
after using this liquid.
289
00:20:21,542 --> 00:20:22,833
If you use this,
290
00:20:23,083 --> 00:20:24,708
your hairs will look like mine too.
291
00:20:58,167 --> 00:20:59,958
He is so late, it is already well past midday.
292
00:21:01,042 --> 00:21:02,458
Damn it!
293
00:21:06,125 --> 00:21:09,625
With my looks,
I don't believe no one will fall for me.
294
00:21:12,083 --> 00:21:14,250
I am gonna dump him.
295
00:21:16,625 --> 00:21:18,292
Handsome guy!
296
00:21:19,167 --> 00:21:20,792
Wanna have lunch with me?
297
00:21:21,167 --> 00:21:23,458
It's so disgusting. Leave her alone.
298
00:21:23,792 --> 00:21:24,792
Let's go.
299
00:21:28,917 --> 00:21:31,875
You made me lose face, I am gonna kill you.
300
00:21:32,042 --> 00:21:33,250
I am so mad.
301
00:21:44,125 --> 00:21:45,708
Are you okay, miss?
302
00:21:46,625 --> 00:21:47,917
I am fine.
303
00:21:48,250 --> 00:21:49,625
Let's go!
304
00:21:53,250 --> 00:21:55,417
There's a handsome guy.
305
00:22:13,208 --> 00:22:18,292
Bro, what's wrong with that girl?
306
00:22:18,875 --> 00:22:19,833
Don't be nosy.
307
00:22:20,042 --> 00:22:21,625
-Waiter. -Yes.
308
00:22:21,833 --> 00:22:24,167
3 dishes and a soup, please hurry.
309
00:22:24,333 --> 00:22:28,500
Alright, how about deep fried spareribs,
braised chicken,
310
00:22:28,792 --> 00:22:31,875
boneless fish and soup of the day.
311
00:22:31,917 --> 00:22:33,042
What do you think?
312
00:22:34,542 --> 00:22:37,625
As the dishes are ready, let's eat then.
313
00:22:48,208 --> 00:22:49,333
Fight!
314
00:23:00,917 --> 00:23:04,125
Great move!
315
00:23:10,375 --> 00:23:11,458
Okay!
316
00:23:32,125 --> 00:23:33,375
Stop that.
317
00:23:34,292 --> 00:23:37,458
You scums, you couldn't even beat two punks .
318
00:23:37,750 --> 00:23:39,792
No meals for you guys today.
319
00:23:40,458 --> 00:23:42,708
Are you the children of Mr. Yuen?
320
00:23:42,875 --> 00:23:46,458
Every one is Mr. Yuen's child.
He loved the people like his own children.
321
00:23:47,750 --> 00:23:50,083
Young people are stubborn.
322
00:24:03,083 --> 00:24:04,708
This eunuch is a superb kung-fu master.
323
00:24:04,917 --> 00:24:07,167
They are not his equal,
they will be dead for sure.
324
00:24:58,458 --> 00:24:59,583
Wonderful!
325
00:25:19,875 --> 00:25:23,333
Let's meet up tomorrow lunch.
326
00:25:27,250 --> 00:25:28,875
What an awesome poison.
327
00:25:29,583 --> 00:25:32,250
I have to drive the poison out for him.
328
00:25:35,167 --> 00:25:36,917
But unmarried men and women
must not touch each other.
329
00:25:37,125 --> 00:25:40,208
If I take off his clothes,
I will be looked upon as a slut...
330
00:25:40,958 --> 00:25:45,042
Let me pass my "life-force"
to him through the mouth.
331
00:25:48,083 --> 00:25:50,042
Am I out of my mind?
332
00:25:50,333 --> 00:25:51,958
I am still a virgin.
333
00:25:52,125 --> 00:25:54,875
If I kiss his mouth,
then I will have to marry him.
334
00:25:59,833 --> 00:26:03,542
But he is so handsome.
Marrying him is not a bad idea.
335
00:26:03,708 --> 00:26:06,167
Alright, then!
336
00:26:11,125 --> 00:26:13,417
No way!
337
00:26:18,708 --> 00:26:22,792
How come he looks so handsome,
but his chest is...
338
00:26:23,292 --> 00:26:24,625
So soft?
339
00:26:26,542 --> 00:26:28,208
He's a girl?
340
00:26:29,625 --> 00:26:31,958
It'll be great if he's a guy.
341
00:26:32,417 --> 00:26:34,458
I will have to heal her.
342
00:26:35,417 --> 00:26:37,958
Honey, you are back?
343
00:26:38,583 --> 00:26:40,292
I am back.
344
00:26:42,292 --> 00:26:44,833
I am so exhausted. I need to sleep.
345
00:26:45,917 --> 00:26:48,167
We are going to sleep too.
346
00:26:51,042 --> 00:26:53,833
Mom and dad, I am getting changed.
347
00:26:54,042 --> 00:26:55,583
Did you hide a guy on your bed?
348
00:26:55,792 --> 00:26:57,042
Of course not.
349
00:26:58,083 --> 00:26:59,792
Show it to me.
350
00:26:59,958 --> 00:27:01,750
Who dares to get on my bed?
351
00:27:02,042 --> 00:27:03,208
Is it that punk?
352
00:27:03,417 --> 00:27:04,167
Royal Dog?
353
00:27:04,792 --> 00:27:06,375
I have dumped him a long time ago.
354
00:27:06,542 --> 00:27:07,708
That's good.
355
00:27:08,458 --> 00:27:10,250
I'd like to sleep with you tonight.
356
00:27:10,417 --> 00:27:12,042
Mom, you are getting REAL fat lately.
357
00:27:12,208 --> 00:27:14,333
We can't sleep in this bed together.
358
00:27:15,167 --> 00:27:16,625
That punk must be on the bed.
359
00:27:16,833 --> 00:27:17,292
No.
360
00:27:17,500 --> 00:27:18,167
-Yes. -No.
361
00:27:18,292 --> 00:27:19,125
-Yes. -No.
362
00:27:19,333 --> 00:27:20,750
I swear that if he's here,
I will put on 10 catty each day.
363
00:27:20,917 --> 00:27:22,250
But if he's not here,
you will get 10 years older each day.
364
00:27:22,417 --> 00:27:23,625
If he's here, you'll have to listen to me.
365
00:27:23,833 --> 00:27:25,625
If he's not here, you'll have to listen to me too.
366
00:27:25,833 --> 00:27:28,625
That's the deal. That's the deal.
367
00:27:28,833 --> 00:27:30,167
Auntie, uncle.
368
00:27:32,917 --> 00:27:34,167
Why are you here?
369
00:27:34,958 --> 00:27:38,708
Mom, you have to listen to me from now on.
370
00:27:40,542 --> 00:27:41,958
I come to apologize to Faithfull.
371
00:27:42,250 --> 00:27:44,417
She won't forgive you.
372
00:27:44,625 --> 00:27:47,042
Even if she does, I won't forgive you anyway.
373
00:27:47,625 --> 00:27:49,625
Uncle, I am a straight talking guy.
374
00:27:49,833 --> 00:27:51,417
Please forgive me,
375
00:27:51,625 --> 00:27:52,958
if I say something to offend you.
376
00:27:53,167 --> 00:27:55,708
I can do that. I will not easily get upset.
377
00:27:55,917 --> 00:27:58,625
Uncle, you are so mean and nasty.
378
00:27:58,875 --> 00:28:00,917
I don't care if you don't forgive me.
379
00:28:01,208 --> 00:28:04,042
Faithfull is so nice to me,
I don't want to upset her.
380
00:28:04,958 --> 00:28:06,250
What do you want?
381
00:28:19,042 --> 00:28:22,792
Thanks for saving me. Why did you laugh
with tears flowing down your face?
382
00:28:22,958 --> 00:28:25,792
My fiance is confessing his love, keep quiet.
383
00:28:25,958 --> 00:28:28,250
Uncle, didn't you say you
will not easily get upset?
384
00:28:28,542 --> 00:28:29,792
I am not upset...
385
00:28:30,125 --> 00:28:32,208
I am very very upset.
386
00:28:33,625 --> 00:28:35,625
Miss, will you do me a favour?
387
00:28:36,750 --> 00:28:39,792
Uncle, will you please stop hitting me?
388
00:28:40,083 --> 00:28:41,375
I have a gift for you.
389
00:28:44,875 --> 00:28:46,625
What gift? What is it?
390
00:28:46,875 --> 00:28:47,583
With this,
391
00:28:47,792 --> 00:28:50,167
you don't have to squat in the toilet anymore.
392
00:28:50,417 --> 00:28:52,500
I can lead the water from the mountain to here.
393
00:28:52,750 --> 00:28:54,917
And flush away the excrements.
394
00:28:55,167 --> 00:28:58,208
Going to the toilet will henceforth be
an enjoyment.
395
00:28:58,792 --> 00:28:59,542
How do you call this?
396
00:28:59,708 --> 00:29:00,875
Dragon and Phoenix bucket.
397
00:29:01,042 --> 00:29:01,917
Sounds weird.
398
00:29:02,125 --> 00:29:03,542
Then what will you call it?
399
00:29:03,750 --> 00:29:05,292
Hero bucket. Beauty bucket.
400
00:29:05,625 --> 00:29:07,792
It's your invention, just call it Dog bucket.
401
00:29:08,208 --> 00:29:09,458
How about Shit bucket?
402
00:29:09,625 --> 00:29:11,958
You should use a better name.
403
00:29:12,167 --> 00:29:13,417
Just call it commode.
404
00:29:13,625 --> 00:29:15,792
You are great, just call it commode.
405
00:29:16,042 --> 00:29:18,542
-Yeah. -Right.
406
00:29:20,833 --> 00:29:23,958
How do you do, auntie and uncle?
407
00:29:24,542 --> 00:29:25,750
Who are you?
408
00:29:26,042 --> 00:29:27,958
He's my man.
409
00:29:28,375 --> 00:29:30,500
Honey, do you fool around?
410
00:29:30,833 --> 00:29:34,417
He the prince of Big-Eaters-land,
his name is Brad Pitt.
411
00:29:35,042 --> 00:29:37,042
What?
412
00:29:37,958 --> 00:29:40,958
I fall in love with your daughter at first sight.
413
00:29:41,167 --> 00:29:43,917
I beg uncle and auntie to concur
with our marriage.
414
00:29:46,583 --> 00:29:48,708
Prince.
415
00:29:49,167 --> 00:29:51,042
Faithful I .
416
00:29:51,500 --> 00:29:52,958
You...
417
00:29:53,292 --> 00:29:54,625
I have other suitors.
418
00:29:54,792 --> 00:29:57,417
Even if you don't want me,
I can marry someone else.
419
00:29:58,417 --> 00:30:00,125
That's right.
420
00:30:01,125 --> 00:30:04,708
Your Highness, please treat her...
421
00:30:04,958 --> 00:30:06,750
well.
422
00:30:07,250 --> 00:30:08,625
He's cute.
423
00:30:08,792 --> 00:30:10,833
Don't you mind hurting him so much?
424
00:30:11,042 --> 00:30:13,542
Oh please, of course I mind. it hurts like hell.
425
00:30:13,750 --> 00:30:14,958
But if I don't hurt him,
he won't appreciate how much I love him.
426
00:30:15,292 --> 00:30:16,958
He will think that I am going to stay
with him forever.
427
00:30:19,167 --> 00:30:21,042
I'd better run.
428
00:30:23,833 --> 00:30:27,167
I do wish to beat him up, but I can't.
429
00:30:27,292 --> 00:30:29,625
A gentleman must control his emotions.
430
00:30:29,833 --> 00:30:33,208
I must not cry, I should smile...
431
00:30:35,542 --> 00:30:38,333
Hey, Royal Dog, you'd better watch out.
432
00:30:38,542 --> 00:30:41,417
Be careful, or you will fall off the mountain.
433
00:30:42,917 --> 00:30:43,917
Don't worry.
434
00:30:44,167 --> 00:30:46,583
I am so damn unlucky that even misfortunes
will stay away from me.
435
00:30:46,750 --> 00:30:47,833
Thanks.
436
00:30:53,417 --> 00:30:55,333
That's pathetic.
437
00:30:57,292 --> 00:30:59,458
You look awful.
438
00:30:59,625 --> 00:31:02,208
You are not a man, why should I care?
439
00:31:02,417 --> 00:31:04,167
Go home and sleep.
440
00:31:08,042 --> 00:31:09,042
That's pathetic...
441
00:31:09,250 --> 00:31:11,875
Brother, if people see you cry like a baby...
That's pathetic...
442
00:31:12,208 --> 00:31:13,875
they won't respect us Royal Secret Guards.
443
00:31:14,625 --> 00:31:15,875
I am deeply hurt, so I cried like a baby.
444
00:31:16,083 --> 00:31:19,417
We are the idols for many palace maids.
445
00:31:19,625 --> 00:31:23,208
Every move of ours can drive them crazy.
446
00:31:23,417 --> 00:31:24,500
Really?
447
00:31:24,750 --> 00:31:26,875
You don't believe me? Come on, bro.
448
00:31:41,625 --> 00:31:42,958
Come on
449
00:32:06,958 --> 00:32:08,125
That's a bit over the top.
450
00:32:08,375 --> 00:32:10,125
This is bad taste.
451
00:32:10,333 --> 00:32:11,625
Come on!
452
00:32:11,792 --> 00:32:14,167
Bro, you cried because you're heart-broken.
453
00:32:14,375 --> 00:32:15,750
We will lose face for that.
454
00:32:15,958 --> 00:32:18,375
As Royal Secret Guards ,
besides protecting the emperor,
455
00:32:18,625 --> 00:32:20,792
we have to keep the world in peace
and the universe in unison.
456
00:32:21,042 --> 00:32:22,125
Even if a monster from outer space falls down
from the sky,
457
00:32:22,375 --> 00:32:24,333
we will fix that, too.
458
00:32:25,125 --> 00:32:27,292
You look like a monster now.
459
00:32:27,500 --> 00:32:28,542
I can take that.
460
00:32:28,917 --> 00:32:29,917
Let us be frank,
461
00:32:30,208 --> 00:32:32,042
we are just security guards in the palace.
462
00:32:32,250 --> 00:32:35,125
Royal Secret Guards my foot...
Bro, security guards are guards too.
463
00:32:35,375 --> 00:32:37,167
I guess you are suffering
from an inferiority complex
464
00:32:37,458 --> 00:32:38,458
Go to see the imperial doctor.
465
00:32:38,583 --> 00:32:40,500
The imperial doctor won't give a damn about us.
466
00:32:40,708 --> 00:32:42,583
Just go have a herbal drink.
It will also cure you.
467
00:32:42,875 --> 00:32:43,792
Go...
468
00:32:43,958 --> 00:32:45,875
I better go home and take a bath.
469
00:32:47,750 --> 00:32:49,708
Assassin! Fetch our buddies, go!
470
00:32:52,167 --> 00:32:54,917
There...
471
00:32:58,042 --> 00:32:59,792
Your Highness, I am Royal Tiger.
472
00:32:59,958 --> 00:33:02,167
It's okay, it's the Royal Secret Guards.
473
00:33:22,042 --> 00:33:23,292
Enjoy watching it?
474
00:33:24,500 --> 00:33:26,167
Of course.
475
00:33:26,750 --> 00:33:29,458
So gorgeous; so charming...
476
00:33:29,625 --> 00:33:31,458
So beautiful; so bewitching...
477
00:33:31,750 --> 00:33:34,250
No words can truly describe the beauty
of Your Highness.
478
00:33:37,333 --> 00:33:41,750
No wonder mom told me that all men are liars.
479
00:33:42,250 --> 00:33:43,333
Please forgive me Your Highness.
480
00:33:43,500 --> 00:33:46,583
I am not being frivolous.
481
00:33:47,083 --> 00:33:50,125
Your Highness, I see someone enter the palace.
482
00:33:50,500 --> 00:33:51,875
This place is not safe.
483
00:33:52,083 --> 00:33:54,708
Your Highness, please go back to your chamber.
484
00:33:54,917 --> 00:33:57,917
You are the best of the Royal Secret Guards.
485
00:33:58,375 --> 00:34:01,625
I should be safe with you around, right?
486
00:34:01,833 --> 00:34:04,500
I will give up my life to protect Your Highness.
487
00:34:05,167 --> 00:34:06,500
It's okay!
488
00:34:08,542 --> 00:34:10,792
Get up, stay and have a chat with me.
489
00:34:22,167 --> 00:34:25,250
I never expect that...
490
00:34:25,458 --> 00:34:27,500
Your Majesty's daughter,
Princess Rainbow, is so popular.
491
00:34:28,292 --> 00:34:30,750
Because she looks like me.
492
00:34:30,958 --> 00:34:34,750
The problem is that the four princes
come at the same time.
493
00:34:34,958 --> 00:34:37,333
Whom should we let her marry?
494
00:34:37,833 --> 00:34:40,333
Who are they?
495
00:34:40,542 --> 00:34:42,042
Prince Nectar from Sindhu.
496
00:34:42,250 --> 00:34:43,458
Prince Falcon from Tazik.
497
00:34:43,750 --> 00:34:45,708
Prince Smart from lzumo.
498
00:34:45,875 --> 00:34:49,125
And Tokugawa Takuya,
the younger son of General Tokugawa from Japan.
499
00:34:49,375 --> 00:34:52,125
Your Majesty, the situation is very delicate.
500
00:34:52,458 --> 00:34:55,958
We must not endanger the good relationship
we have with these countries.
501
00:34:56,125 --> 00:34:58,500
I think so.
502
00:34:58,833 --> 00:35:02,750
That is why I come to discuss it with you two.
503
00:35:03,583 --> 00:35:05,750
I do have an idea.
504
00:35:05,958 --> 00:35:10,375
Let's hold a competition to decide
who will marry Princess Rainbow.
505
00:35:11,333 --> 00:35:15,750
They must compete with each other.
506
00:35:16,583 --> 00:35:20,792
The winner will be our son-in-law.
507
00:35:21,042 --> 00:35:22,542
That's a good idea.
508
00:35:22,750 --> 00:35:24,958
Your Majesty, give me a million taels
of gold to buy new clothes.
509
00:35:25,250 --> 00:35:26,750
You had already bought
a lot of new clothes yesterday.
510
00:35:26,958 --> 00:35:29,250
Your Majesty, the idea is good.
511
00:35:29,458 --> 00:35:33,083
But the one who comes last...
512
00:35:33,333 --> 00:35:35,958
would feel humiliated.
513
00:35:36,250 --> 00:35:38,375
So I suggest we also send two
of our men to enter the competition.
514
00:35:38,625 --> 00:35:41,792
But they must come last,
so that the princes will not be humiliated.
515
00:35:42,042 --> 00:35:43,458
Yeah...that's a good idea.
516
00:35:43,750 --> 00:35:44,917
That's a better idea than buying new clothes.
517
00:35:45,333 --> 00:35:47,750
What should we call the competition?
518
00:35:47,958 --> 00:35:52,083
How about "Princes Got Talent"?
519
00:35:52,292 --> 00:35:53,708
No, that is not good.
520
00:35:53,875 --> 00:35:56,958
How about "The Idol Prince"?
521
00:35:59,875 --> 00:36:01,500
"Princes Got Talent" is a good name.
522
00:36:01,625 --> 00:36:02,708
"The Idol Prince" is better.
523
00:36:02,958 --> 00:36:03,875
"Princes Got Talent" is the best.
524
00:36:04,042 --> 00:36:05,125
"The Idol Prince" is better than the best.
525
00:36:05,750 --> 00:36:08,250
Why do you have to go against me all the time?
526
00:36:08,458 --> 00:36:10,625
Let's call it the Perfect Husband
of Princess Rainbow Competition!
527
00:36:12,458 --> 00:36:15,292
Perfect Husband of Princess Rainbow?
528
00:36:15,500 --> 00:36:16,542
Great!
529
00:36:19,917 --> 00:36:24,625
Buy new clothes, I need to buy new clothes...
530
00:36:24,875 --> 00:36:26,417
If I don't kill him now,
I won't have another chance.
531
00:36:30,958 --> 00:36:31,958
Looks like an assassin.
532
00:36:32,167 --> 00:36:32,917
Your Majesty, I need to go to the toilet...
533
00:36:33,125 --> 00:36:34,375
Your Majesty, he's gone.
534
00:36:37,583 --> 00:36:40,250
Protect the emperor!
535
00:37:03,833 --> 00:37:05,375
This assassin is a good fighter.
536
00:37:05,542 --> 00:37:07,083
I think lp Man is a better fighter.
537
00:37:07,875 --> 00:37:08,958
Who is lp Man?
538
00:37:14,375 --> 00:37:18,958
I let you off yesterday, now you come again?
539
00:37:56,417 --> 00:37:57,625
Heart-protecting armour?
540
00:38:12,250 --> 00:38:16,750
Ducky...l am pathetic.
541
00:38:19,833 --> 00:38:22,875
Iron the clothes, then take a shower.
542
00:38:23,042 --> 00:38:25,625
Then have a cup of herbal tea.
543
00:38:43,625 --> 00:38:45,500
He's got a great body.
544
00:38:45,625 --> 00:38:47,292
What am I thinking?
545
00:38:48,542 --> 00:38:52,250
That assassin flew high and fast.
546
00:38:52,458 --> 00:38:53,958
His kung-fu must be very good...
547
00:38:54,292 --> 00:38:55,583
I have nothing to do with.
548
00:38:55,958 --> 00:38:57,125
-You! Dead mouse... -What?
549
00:38:57,417 --> 00:38:59,125
Where's Spring?
550
00:38:59,333 --> 00:39:01,625
Where's Spring?
551
00:39:01,833 --> 00:39:04,417
Spring is here.
552
00:39:06,417 --> 00:39:07,542
Bro.
553
00:39:08,625 --> 00:39:12,083
You just told me to catch the assassin.
554
00:39:12,333 --> 00:39:14,333
Why did you become so...
555
00:39:15,417 --> 00:39:17,042
flirtatious all of a sudden?
556
00:39:19,083 --> 00:39:20,333
He has fallen in love.
557
00:39:20,542 --> 00:39:21,833
Are you sure?
558
00:39:22,750 --> 00:39:24,333
This is how he feels to be in love?
559
00:39:24,542 --> 00:39:25,917
Of course, take a look.
560
00:39:26,083 --> 00:39:27,708
If a person does or says revolting things...
561
00:39:27,917 --> 00:39:29,583
but does not feel embarrassed at all,
562
00:39:29,917 --> 00:39:31,583
then he or she is in love.
563
00:39:33,708 --> 00:39:35,958
He's changing too fast though.
564
00:39:39,208 --> 00:39:42,542
Lord Unicorn, it is our honour
to welcome Your Honour here.
565
00:39:42,875 --> 00:39:44,167
Anything I can help?
566
00:39:44,333 --> 00:39:46,125
Catch the assassin.
567
00:39:48,917 --> 00:39:51,708
As Royal Secret Guards,
our mission is to fall in love, no...
568
00:39:51,875 --> 00:39:53,083
to woo the princess...no...
569
00:39:53,333 --> 00:39:55,333
to protect the emperor against
His Majesty's enemies.
570
00:39:55,708 --> 00:39:57,708
Now Your Honour came here to catch the assassin,
571
00:39:57,875 --> 00:40:00,250
are you accusing us of sheltering the assassin?
572
00:40:00,792 --> 00:40:05,083
It's hard to say. This is a strange world.
573
00:40:05,500 --> 00:40:08,708
I think it is much ado about nothing.
574
00:40:09,375 --> 00:40:12,792
Yes, so what?
575
00:40:12,958 --> 00:40:15,083
Calm down, we are all on the same side.
576
00:40:15,292 --> 00:40:16,500
Hold it, who says you're on my side?
577
00:40:16,708 --> 00:40:18,500
He used to talk in this manner.
578
00:40:18,958 --> 00:40:20,583
-He is a sissy. -You pig!
579
00:40:22,875 --> 00:40:25,833
The Icy Palm martial art is nothing special.
580
00:40:27,208 --> 00:40:29,125
Just a bit chilly.
581
00:40:59,417 --> 00:41:01,208
Yeah, you don't have.
582
00:41:32,375 --> 00:41:34,042
Bro, watch out!
583
00:41:34,250 --> 00:41:35,583
Who is fighting out there?
584
00:41:52,500 --> 00:41:53,625
Close the door.
585
00:41:57,625 --> 00:41:58,500
Close the windows.
586
00:42:00,458 --> 00:42:01,792
Turn off the light.
587
00:42:03,375 --> 00:42:04,292
Let the dogs out.
588
00:42:04,500 --> 00:42:05,917
Why not let me out?
589
00:42:11,583 --> 00:42:14,083
How come I can hear two persons' heartbeats?
590
00:42:35,625 --> 00:42:38,750
The juice of firefly---
even the blind could see that.
591
00:42:38,958 --> 00:42:41,958
You coward, where are you?
592
00:42:42,583 --> 00:42:44,125
There is no one here.
593
00:42:44,375 --> 00:42:46,125
You coward.
594
00:42:51,333 --> 00:42:52,958
You can't beat me.
595
00:42:54,542 --> 00:42:57,750
The mighty stick that can beat
the hell out of you.
596
00:43:00,500 --> 00:43:02,292
Attack me behind my back?
597
00:43:08,083 --> 00:43:11,750
Self-ventilating impenetrable armor.
598
00:43:14,208 --> 00:43:16,208
My hand...
599
00:43:21,375 --> 00:43:22,792
Again?
600
00:43:25,958 --> 00:43:27,375
So big?
601
00:43:27,542 --> 00:43:30,333
I will gonna kill you.
602
00:43:35,250 --> 00:43:36,625
The Fire Kick.
603
00:43:45,875 --> 00:43:48,792
BBQ Pork Hock.
604
00:43:51,750 --> 00:43:54,083
It's done, that's it.
605
00:43:55,750 --> 00:43:57,167
Bro.
606
00:43:57,458 --> 00:43:59,083
I have got nothing to do with this.
607
00:43:59,875 --> 00:44:01,125
It is your new invention?
608
00:44:01,250 --> 00:44:02,750
Obviously.
609
00:44:03,417 --> 00:44:05,125
I am relieved that you are fine.
610
00:44:05,625 --> 00:44:07,750
Don't worry, I already chased him away.
611
00:44:07,917 --> 00:44:08,875
Why are you so cool?
612
00:44:09,083 --> 00:44:11,958
No, I am not cool.
I am just knowledgeable about science.
613
00:44:12,875 --> 00:44:14,542
Alright, how long are you going
to hug me like this?
614
00:44:14,750 --> 00:44:16,792
Don't move now.
615
00:44:16,958 --> 00:44:17,750
Bro...
616
00:44:17,917 --> 00:44:19,958
Thank you for kicking that old wizard out.
617
00:44:20,125 --> 00:44:22,125
Otherwise, we Royal Secret Guards will lose face.
618
00:44:22,333 --> 00:44:24,708
I am afraid that he will accuse us
of sheltering the assassin.
619
00:44:25,375 --> 00:44:27,708
No, he won't.
620
00:44:27,875 --> 00:44:29,750
He will be ashamed if everybody knows
what happens tonight.
621
00:44:29,958 --> 00:44:30,708
Right!
622
00:44:30,875 --> 00:44:31,875
Assassin!
623
00:44:32,167 --> 00:44:33,333
No...
624
00:44:33,583 --> 00:44:35,542
Brad?
625
00:44:36,292 --> 00:44:37,750
Why are you coming out from there?
626
00:44:37,917 --> 00:44:39,500
I come here to watch you...
627
00:44:39,750 --> 00:44:40,875
No, I...
628
00:44:41,125 --> 00:44:42,375
I come to see you.
629
00:44:42,583 --> 00:44:43,750
Who is he?
630
00:44:49,958 --> 00:44:52,208
He's the man Faithfull loves.
631
00:44:52,708 --> 00:44:54,708
He's called Brad.
632
00:44:54,875 --> 00:44:56,208
You are the guy...
633
00:44:58,875 --> 00:45:02,375
Royal Dog,
although I want Faithfull to love me more,
634
00:45:02,708 --> 00:45:04,958
I know now that you also love her deeply.
635
00:45:05,208 --> 00:45:07,375
So we can have a fair duel and see
who wins her heart.
636
00:45:07,583 --> 00:45:09,542
You want to fight, punk?
637
00:45:11,250 --> 00:45:12,708
No violence.
638
00:45:14,125 --> 00:45:17,833
Okay, I accept your challenge.
639
00:45:31,583 --> 00:45:33,125
Who are you?
640
00:45:33,375 --> 00:45:34,875
I am your substitute.
641
00:45:42,458 --> 00:45:43,542
Who are you?
642
00:45:46,458 --> 00:45:49,083
I will use your identity to kill
the Chinese emperor.
643
00:45:49,250 --> 00:45:51,458
I will avenge the death of my buddies.
644
00:45:52,458 --> 00:45:56,167
Sister, this is our chance
of staging a coup d'etat.
645
00:45:56,333 --> 00:45:58,833
Why should we stage a coup d'etat?
646
00:45:59,083 --> 00:46:00,333
-Haven't you got money? -I have a lot.
647
00:46:00,542 --> 00:46:02,167
-Have you no woman? -Wave dozens.
648
00:46:02,333 --> 00:46:04,583
The emperor doesn't have a single penny
in his pocket.
649
00:46:04,750 --> 00:46:05,875
And I am the only woman he has.
650
00:46:06,083 --> 00:46:07,833
He's bullied by me everyday.
651
00:46:10,708 --> 00:46:12,500
I think he's pathetic.
652
00:46:12,708 --> 00:46:14,250
Why do you want to take his place?
653
00:46:14,458 --> 00:46:15,542
Well, what else can I do now,
654
00:46:15,750 --> 00:46:17,708
other than staging a coup d'etat
and be emperor myself?
655
00:46:17,917 --> 00:46:18,583
Leopard.
656
00:46:18,750 --> 00:46:19,583
Your Highness.
657
00:46:19,833 --> 00:46:21,833
Kill Prince Nectar,
658
00:46:22,167 --> 00:46:24,750
and also the emperor and Lord Unicorn.
659
00:46:25,083 --> 00:46:26,625
Then we will have absolute power.
660
00:46:26,833 --> 00:46:28,042
What about me?
661
00:46:28,208 --> 00:46:32,500
I will give you the title
The Supreme Beauty of the Kingdom.
662
00:46:34,167 --> 00:46:36,833
I love the new title.
663
00:46:37,042 --> 00:46:39,250
Let's overthrow the emperor then.
664
00:46:39,625 --> 00:46:43,792
Ha...OK...
665
00:46:46,792 --> 00:46:48,708
Royal Secret Guards, order!
666
00:46:49,208 --> 00:46:52,125
Today, four princes will arrive at the
Imperial City to participate in the competition.
667
00:46:52,375 --> 00:46:55,042
To maintain good relationship
with our neighboring countries,
668
00:46:55,208 --> 00:46:57,708
We need to pick two men to enter
the competition too.
669
00:46:57,917 --> 00:47:00,125
One MUST win,
670
00:47:00,333 --> 00:47:03,750
and the other MUST come last.
671
00:47:04,417 --> 00:47:07,208
Your Majesty,
this is a difficult and dangerous mission.
672
00:47:07,417 --> 00:47:10,458
It needs to be handled well.
673
00:47:10,625 --> 00:47:13,042
With your permission, I will take this mission...
674
00:47:13,375 --> 00:47:14,625
for my fellow guards.
675
00:47:15,500 --> 00:47:17,458
Royal Rat, you are a loyal servant.
676
00:47:17,833 --> 00:47:18,583
You will join the competition.
677
00:47:18,958 --> 00:47:19,917
Thanks, Your Majesty.
678
00:47:20,083 --> 00:47:21,458
Just pick the worst Guard to be the one...
679
00:47:21,625 --> 00:47:23,708
who must lose the competition.
680
00:47:24,167 --> 00:47:25,375
Him!
681
00:47:25,583 --> 00:47:27,250
Him?
682
00:47:27,583 --> 00:47:28,500
Your Majesty,
683
00:47:28,708 --> 00:47:30,583
in such an important competition,
we need to have a substitute ready...
684
00:47:30,792 --> 00:47:33,042
in case accidents happen.
685
00:47:34,208 --> 00:47:35,708
Alright, just pick someone...
686
00:47:35,917 --> 00:47:37,125
to be the substitute.
687
00:47:37,458 --> 00:47:38,583
Who wants to volunteer?
688
00:47:40,750 --> 00:47:42,750
Thanks, bro.
689
00:47:42,958 --> 00:47:44,417
Thanks, Your Majesty.
690
00:47:44,583 --> 00:47:46,042
What?
691
00:47:50,542 --> 00:47:51,625
I am just the substitute.
692
00:47:51,833 --> 00:47:54,792
If nobody gets injured or sick,
I won't have to enter the competition.
693
00:47:58,625 --> 00:48:00,167
Didn't I roll fast?
694
00:48:00,375 --> 00:48:01,500
Kids, don't imitate what I have done.
695
00:48:01,750 --> 00:48:04,167
I can do this because I have been trained.
696
00:48:04,458 --> 00:48:05,958
He must be in great pain.
697
00:48:06,458 --> 00:48:07,583
Stop bugging me, okay?
698
00:48:07,750 --> 00:48:09,167
Alright.
699
00:48:10,833 --> 00:48:12,917
I can't run, I am crippled.
700
00:48:13,167 --> 00:48:15,292
Royal Dog, let me warn you.
701
00:48:15,542 --> 00:48:17,083
You are supposed to lose in the competition.
702
00:48:17,333 --> 00:48:20,958
You have to stay in the competition
to the end no matter what happens.
703
00:48:30,583 --> 00:48:33,458
I can't move, I am crippled!
704
00:48:34,208 --> 00:48:36,250
Can he roll like that again?
705
00:48:37,375 --> 00:48:38,625
Attack me behind my back...
706
00:48:38,875 --> 00:48:41,875
I won't let you get away with this.
707
00:48:44,083 --> 00:48:46,042
Rainbow.
708
00:48:46,208 --> 00:48:48,625
Are you having wet dreams even in day time?
709
00:48:50,250 --> 00:48:53,917
Get through the door, and there's another door.
710
00:48:54,167 --> 00:48:54,792
Are you dreaming?
711
00:48:54,958 --> 00:48:56,333
How do you know?
712
00:48:57,833 --> 00:48:58,958
Rainbow?
713
00:49:00,417 --> 00:49:01,792
Your Highness.
714
00:49:02,167 --> 00:49:04,042
Get up.
715
00:49:05,458 --> 00:49:06,833
What are you guys looking at?
716
00:49:07,042 --> 00:49:07,750
Your room.
717
00:49:07,958 --> 00:49:09,292
No.
718
00:49:09,542 --> 00:49:12,292
We are working out how to protect His Majesty.
719
00:49:15,292 --> 00:49:18,083
I heard that the four princes are staying
at the hotel outside the Forbidden City, right?
720
00:49:18,250 --> 00:49:18,875
Yes.
721
00:49:19,042 --> 00:49:22,750
Royal Dog and I will go
and meet them at the hotel.
722
00:49:23,375 --> 00:49:24,542
I want to go too.
723
00:49:24,750 --> 00:49:26,833
I'd like to know what they look like.
724
00:49:27,042 --> 00:49:29,583
Your Highness, you can't
725
00:49:30,625 --> 00:49:32,167
meet those princes...
726
00:49:32,500 --> 00:49:33,542
in private...
727
00:49:33,708 --> 00:49:36,625
Your Highness has to get permission
from His Majesty.
728
00:49:37,583 --> 00:49:40,500
I won't ask you if I have to
ask for His Majesty's permission.
729
00:49:40,708 --> 00:49:42,042
Over here...
730
00:49:42,417 --> 00:49:45,167
I will get changed and go out with you guys.
731
00:49:45,333 --> 00:49:46,875
How's that?
732
00:49:47,417 --> 00:49:51,542
The palace guards will recognize us.
733
00:49:51,833 --> 00:49:54,250
It's not going to work.
734
00:49:57,750 --> 00:49:59,458
I thought you like me.
735
00:49:59,750 --> 00:50:02,625
Now I know you're not.
736
00:50:03,917 --> 00:50:05,167
Of course I like you...
737
00:50:05,417 --> 00:50:06,708
I...
738
00:50:09,042 --> 00:50:11,125
I send you flowers.
739
00:50:12,375 --> 00:50:14,542
Then you should think of a way to get me there.
740
00:50:21,167 --> 00:50:21,875
You...
741
00:50:22,083 --> 00:50:23,333
take off your clothes.
742
00:50:29,708 --> 00:50:31,958
Will they believe it or not?
743
00:50:50,167 --> 00:50:51,333
Who are they?
744
00:50:51,583 --> 00:50:53,750
Those foreign princes are having a fight.
745
00:50:55,167 --> 00:50:57,333
They are all very ugly.
746
00:50:57,542 --> 00:51:01,333
Look, one of them almost loses all his hairs.
747
00:51:01,875 --> 00:51:03,500
That's lousy.
748
00:51:08,458 --> 00:51:11,583
They are so ugly,
I don't want to marry any one of them.
749
00:51:12,208 --> 00:51:14,625
Why are there only three princes?
750
00:51:14,833 --> 00:51:16,208
Where is the other one?
751
00:51:21,208 --> 00:51:23,125
Brad?
752
00:51:23,542 --> 00:51:25,125
He is so handsome.
753
00:51:27,083 --> 00:51:28,458
Hold me.
754
00:51:38,250 --> 00:51:40,333
He is so graceful.
755
00:51:48,958 --> 00:51:50,708
How dare you, Brad?
756
00:51:50,875 --> 00:51:52,333
Faithfull loves you so much.
757
00:51:52,625 --> 00:51:53,958
How can you want to marry the princess?
758
00:51:54,167 --> 00:51:55,875
Faithfull will be heart-broken.
759
00:51:56,083 --> 00:51:58,167
A man should sow his seeds when he is young.
760
00:51:58,333 --> 00:52:00,458
Besides, it's an order from my father.
761
00:52:00,708 --> 00:52:02,583
I can't disobey my father.
762
00:52:03,042 --> 00:52:05,333
I forgot to tell you,
763
00:52:05,542 --> 00:52:06,958
they used to call me Prince Handsome.
764
00:52:07,208 --> 00:52:10,917
Faithfull likes to call me Handsome too.
765
00:52:11,542 --> 00:52:14,708
Don't fool around because you are handsome.
766
00:52:24,625 --> 00:52:26,208
Can you stop fighting?
767
00:52:26,458 --> 00:52:28,125
Or I will put all of you in jail.
768
00:52:28,375 --> 00:52:30,375
I am here to welcome you all on behalf
of His Majesty.
769
00:52:30,625 --> 00:52:32,375
Tomorrow you will go to meet His Majesty.
770
00:52:32,708 --> 00:52:35,417
No more fighting, just be friends, okay?
771
00:52:35,750 --> 00:52:36,583
Who are you?
772
00:52:36,792 --> 00:52:39,542
I am Tiger, the mighty guard from Central Plains.
773
00:52:39,750 --> 00:52:42,375
This is my brother, Royal Dog.
774
00:52:47,458 --> 00:52:48,833
Two punks.
775
00:52:48,958 --> 00:52:52,417
After the competition, you will all be cripples.
776
00:52:52,625 --> 00:52:54,583
Why should we be friends now?
777
00:52:56,292 --> 00:52:57,333
Where's the princess?
778
00:53:03,250 --> 00:53:04,875
What the hell! I am leaving...
779
00:53:05,917 --> 00:53:09,125
This is so disrespectful to the Princess.
780
00:53:11,292 --> 00:53:14,042
I don't care who the hell he is.
781
00:53:14,292 --> 00:53:15,542
I just want to beat him up.
782
00:53:15,708 --> 00:53:17,500
-Me too. -Me too.
783
00:53:18,708 --> 00:53:21,625
Don't be a fool, or we will fix you up.
784
00:53:23,375 --> 00:53:25,708
Are there no handsome men in the country?
785
00:53:32,042 --> 00:53:33,125
Your Majesty.
786
00:53:33,417 --> 00:53:35,333
Long live the Emperor!
787
00:53:35,542 --> 00:53:37,917
Everybody gets up-
788
00:53:38,167 --> 00:53:39,417
Thanks, Your Majesty.
789
00:53:39,583 --> 00:53:42,833
Today I am going to choose a husband
for the princess.
790
00:53:43,042 --> 00:53:46,458
The winner would be my son-in-law.
791
00:53:46,917 --> 00:53:51,833
My son-in-law should be
a kung fu master and a man of letters.
792
00:53:52,042 --> 00:53:56,083
He should also love Princess Rainbow
with his whole soul.
793
00:53:56,292 --> 00:53:59,167
So, contestants would enter two tests today.
794
00:53:59,333 --> 00:54:00,958
First, the oral test.
795
00:54:01,167 --> 00:54:04,958
Contestants must express their love
to Princess Rainbow in flowery speech.
796
00:54:05,167 --> 00:54:07,125
Second, IQ test.
797
00:54:07,292 --> 00:54:09,417
And martial arts will be tested tomorrow.
798
00:54:09,625 --> 00:54:11,625
Okay, who first?
799
00:54:11,917 --> 00:54:15,958
Tell Princess Rainbow how much you love her.
800
00:54:17,417 --> 00:54:18,833
Me first.
801
00:54:26,875 --> 00:54:28,500
Look how strong I am.
802
00:54:28,750 --> 00:54:32,708
With me by her side,
no one will dare to offend the princess.
803
00:54:44,833 --> 00:54:47,250
Young fellow, you stink...
804
00:54:47,500 --> 00:54:49,792
you'd better go home and wash up yourself!
805
00:54:49,958 --> 00:54:51,292
Next.
806
00:54:57,167 --> 00:54:58,875
I am out of it.
807
00:54:59,958 --> 00:55:01,292
Get out of my way!
808
00:55:02,833 --> 00:55:04,083
How rude!
809
00:55:14,250 --> 00:55:16,500
Awesome, another one...
810
00:55:28,958 --> 00:55:31,625
That's enough! Go home, idiot!
811
00:55:35,375 --> 00:55:39,583
That handsome fellow, you go ahead.
812
00:55:44,958 --> 00:55:49,708
Your Highness,
my love for you is like the evening star.
813
00:55:55,583 --> 00:55:57,792
I can't take that...
814
00:55:58,833 --> 00:56:01,917
-Your Highness... -Your Highness...
815
00:56:02,083 --> 00:56:03,333
What should we do now?
816
00:56:03,875 --> 00:56:07,958
You are embarrassing Her Highness. Get lost.
817
00:56:09,708 --> 00:56:12,792
Brother, you have practiced
the whole night yesterday.
818
00:56:12,958 --> 00:56:14,792
It's time to let us see it.
819
00:56:14,958 --> 00:56:16,292
Your master move.
820
00:56:16,583 --> 00:56:18,875
Brother, I am very nervous.
821
00:56:19,083 --> 00:56:19,958
Why should you be nervous?
822
00:56:20,208 --> 00:56:23,292
You were doing fine last night, go ahead.
823
00:56:30,958 --> 00:56:32,125
Ready.
824
00:56:32,292 --> 00:56:33,458
Go.
825
00:56:34,958 --> 00:56:38,292
Your Highness, my love for you is so great that,
826
00:56:38,583 --> 00:56:41,542
no matter how big the tempest,
how violent the storm...
827
00:56:41,708 --> 00:56:44,792
nothing is gonna stop me.
828
00:56:45,083 --> 00:56:46,625
Whether you love me or not,
829
00:56:46,833 --> 00:56:49,750
I'll be your protector all my life.
830
00:56:49,958 --> 00:56:52,708
To keep you safe and happy.
831
00:56:53,083 --> 00:56:55,958
Let me shoulder all your burden.
832
00:57:03,625 --> 00:57:04,292
Okay, ready.
833
00:57:04,458 --> 00:57:06,333
1,2,3, go.
834
00:57:07,833 --> 00:57:09,958
Your...
835
00:57:11,625 --> 00:57:13,958
Your...
836
00:57:14,917 --> 00:57:15,708
What's wrong with you?
837
00:57:15,875 --> 00:57:17,208
Bro, I am very nervous.
838
00:57:17,417 --> 00:57:19,167
Why is that?
839
00:57:19,417 --> 00:57:22,417
As soon as I look at her, I can't utter a word.
840
00:57:22,917 --> 00:57:25,250
Well, don't look upon her as the princess.
841
00:57:25,458 --> 00:57:27,958
But pretend that she is our mother.
842
00:57:28,208 --> 00:57:31,750
Or your most hated enemy, go ahead and say it.
843
00:57:43,625 --> 00:57:45,958
Father, am I that ugly? Father...
844
00:57:46,167 --> 00:57:47,250
Royal Tiger, how dare you...
845
00:57:47,458 --> 00:57:50,625
Throw up in front of the princess,
that's insulting.
846
00:57:50,875 --> 00:57:54,500
Cast him out.
847
00:57:56,250 --> 00:57:58,833
Royal Dog, I order you to make the princess laugh.
848
00:57:58,958 --> 00:58:02,542
Or you will eat Royal Tiger's vomit.
849
00:58:05,333 --> 00:58:06,583
Are you hungry?
850
00:58:14,333 --> 00:58:15,583
Let's go!
851
00:58:17,583 --> 00:58:20,917
Your Highness, if you ask me
852
00:58:21,167 --> 00:58:22,625
how much I love you,
853
00:58:22,833 --> 00:58:25,375
My love for you is as genuine as...
854
00:58:25,625 --> 00:58:27,625
the moon.
855
00:58:27,875 --> 00:58:31,333
Just a light kiss and I am deeply moved.
856
00:58:31,625 --> 00:58:32,958
For an everlasting romance...
857
00:58:34,167 --> 00:58:36,750
how could I forget that?
858
00:58:37,583 --> 00:58:41,958
Brother...Calm down...
859
00:58:42,125 --> 00:58:43,333
Father...
860
00:58:44,083 --> 00:58:45,375
I want to marry him.
861
00:58:47,083 --> 00:58:49,542
Really? Are you sure?
862
00:58:49,708 --> 00:58:53,417
Yes, I trust him. It will be great...
863
00:58:53,750 --> 00:58:55,708
To be his father-in-law.
864
00:58:56,333 --> 00:58:58,208
None of my business.
865
00:58:58,958 --> 00:59:03,083
You can surely sweet-talk the princess
into marrying you but you can't fool me.
866
00:59:03,250 --> 00:59:04,875
Alright, I will test your IQ.
867
00:59:05,583 --> 00:59:06,958
Should I be tested on literacy?
868
00:59:07,250 --> 00:59:11,083
I decide what test you will take!
869
00:59:11,750 --> 00:59:13,833
Alright, go ahead.
870
00:59:14,042 --> 00:59:17,125
A rare lamb chop and a medium rare beef steak
871
00:59:17,375 --> 00:59:18,625
were put in the pan.
872
00:59:18,875 --> 00:59:19,917
Why didn't they talk to each other?
873
00:59:20,208 --> 00:59:21,708
Because they are not done.
874
00:59:22,042 --> 00:59:23,625
A shark has eaten 50 catty of green pea,
875
00:59:23,917 --> 00:59:24,625
what would it become?
876
00:59:24,833 --> 00:59:26,333
Green pea congee!
877
00:59:30,250 --> 00:59:31,083
Great!
878
00:59:31,333 --> 00:59:33,875
The chief of a cannibalistic tribe suddenly
wants to eat vegetables.
879
00:59:34,083 --> 00:59:34,958
What should he have?
880
00:59:35,167 --> 00:59:36,292
A veggie.
881
00:59:36,750 --> 00:59:38,458
You go camping in the wilderness.
882
00:59:38,958 --> 00:59:41,583
You get up at midnight,
you can see stars in the sky.
883
00:59:41,792 --> 00:59:43,375
And the Big Dipper is over your head
884
00:59:43,625 --> 00:59:45,375
What would you think of?
885
00:59:45,750 --> 00:59:49,333
The vast universe and the brevity of human life.
886
00:59:49,500 --> 00:59:50,167
Wrong.
887
00:59:50,375 --> 00:59:52,167
Your tent is stolen.
888
00:59:53,958 --> 00:59:58,375
If you are wrong again, you will be out.
889
00:59:59,833 --> 01:00:01,958
How strict you are...
890
01:00:02,208 --> 01:00:03,958
Alright, ask your question.
891
01:00:06,500 --> 01:00:09,250
There's a foreign woman who doesn't know Chinese.
892
01:00:09,500 --> 01:00:11,708
When she goes to buy chicken breast,
she points to her own chest.
893
01:00:11,958 --> 01:00:13,583
And mimicks the chicken's crow.
894
01:00:13,875 --> 01:00:14,958
She successfully buys chicken breast.
895
01:00:15,125 --> 01:00:16,875
On the next day, she needs to buy dried sausage.
896
01:00:17,083 --> 01:00:19,167
Instead of going herself,
she tells her husband to go buy it, why?
897
01:00:22,250 --> 01:00:24,542
Because her husband speaks Chinese.
898
01:00:25,542 --> 01:00:28,083
Bravo! Brother...
899
01:00:28,833 --> 01:00:30,625
You are driving me nuts.
900
01:00:30,833 --> 01:00:34,375
You are forcing me to ask you
901
01:00:34,708 --> 01:00:35,958
the unanswerable question.
902
01:00:37,208 --> 01:00:39,958
You scare me.
903
01:00:40,625 --> 01:00:43,833
In the middle of the night,
a man is wakened by his child...
904
01:00:44,125 --> 01:00:45,500
who cries because he is hungry.
905
01:00:45,708 --> 01:00:49,917
Which part of the body
should he use to feed his child?
906
01:00:50,083 --> 01:00:51,250
His right foot. Why?
907
01:00:51,458 --> 01:00:54,458
Because he kicks his wife to wake her up
to feed the child.
908
01:00:56,750 --> 01:00:59,083
I am pissed...
909
01:00:59,958 --> 01:01:01,333
To me, such questions...
910
01:01:01,542 --> 01:01:04,083
are a piece of cake, Your Highness!
911
01:01:04,458 --> 01:01:08,833
Okay, I will announce the result for today.
912
01:01:09,042 --> 01:01:11,375
Royal Dog, 6 points.
913
01:01:12,375 --> 01:01:13,708
And the others...
914
01:01:13,917 --> 01:01:15,083
zero points.
915
01:01:15,250 --> 01:01:16,042
What?
916
01:01:16,250 --> 01:01:18,167
Royal Dog is now the favourite
to win this competition
917
01:01:18,333 --> 01:01:19,417
Yes.
918
01:01:19,583 --> 01:01:21,417
If he gets 2 points tomorrow...
919
01:01:21,625 --> 01:01:23,917
Princess Rainbow will have to marry him.
920
01:01:24,208 --> 01:01:25,167
But he doesn't know kung-fu.
921
01:01:25,500 --> 01:01:27,833
Yeah, he cannot fight.
922
01:01:28,250 --> 01:01:30,583
Yet still he managed to kill
all the ninja assassins.
923
01:01:30,833 --> 01:01:33,250
Lord Unicorn was fooled by him a few days ago.
924
01:01:33,458 --> 01:01:36,583
Would it be a surprise
if he beats all those princes?
925
01:01:37,458 --> 01:01:39,708
Then let this idiot marry the princess.
926
01:01:39,958 --> 01:01:41,792
In fact, I am fed up with him.
927
01:01:42,125 --> 01:01:43,958
Don't you guys want me not to marry him?
928
01:01:44,167 --> 01:01:47,292
It'd be fine for you to dump him.
929
01:01:47,583 --> 01:01:49,583
But if he marries the princess...
930
01:01:49,792 --> 01:01:52,042
people will think that it is he who dumps you.
931
01:01:52,250 --> 01:01:56,500
You will become the abandoned woman. What a shame!
932
01:01:56,708 --> 01:01:59,208
Right, what should I do then?
933
01:01:59,458 --> 01:02:00,917
Stop him from entering the competition tomorrow.
934
01:02:01,333 --> 01:02:02,625
How?
935
01:02:03,208 --> 01:02:04,708
What is done cannot be undone.
936
01:02:06,833 --> 01:02:08,417
You want me to...
937
01:02:08,625 --> 01:02:09,875
No way.
938
01:02:10,208 --> 01:02:12,708
My dear daughter, let's say...
939
01:02:12,917 --> 01:02:14,625
Someone snatches your husband,
no one would believe that.
940
01:02:14,917 --> 01:02:16,042
If the princess
941
01:02:16,292 --> 01:02:20,042
snatches your husband, everyone will believe that.
942
01:02:20,500 --> 01:02:21,417
You will lose face! You will be humiliated!
943
01:02:21,625 --> 01:02:23,583
But I don't know how to seduce men...
944
01:02:25,875 --> 01:02:28,625
For your sake, your mother
945
01:02:28,875 --> 01:02:30,917
Wave to use my master move.
946
01:02:35,125 --> 01:02:37,292
I am lonely and lost.
947
01:02:37,458 --> 01:02:40,833
Come on, honey, hold me tight...
948
01:02:42,875 --> 01:02:44,542
So warm.
949
01:02:47,958 --> 01:02:50,792
Hey, you two throw up?
950
01:02:51,292 --> 01:02:52,792
Am I that disgusting?
951
01:02:52,958 --> 01:02:55,042
Of course not. Mom, you are great.
952
01:02:55,250 --> 01:02:57,250
I already know how to "snatch a husband".
953
01:02:57,542 --> 01:02:58,958
I will use it on Royal Dog.
954
01:02:59,625 --> 01:03:02,083
Honey, you can do it. Go get him.
955
01:03:02,250 --> 01:03:04,625
Right! You can do it.
956
01:03:04,958 --> 01:03:06,625
Get him...
957
01:03:07,417 --> 01:03:08,375
Bastard.
958
01:03:09,750 --> 01:03:11,542
Amida Buddha, for the rest of our life...
959
01:03:11,750 --> 01:03:13,875
for rich or for poor
960
01:03:14,125 --> 01:03:16,125
Please give us your blessing.
961
01:03:20,292 --> 01:03:21,875
Let's see.
962
01:03:22,083 --> 01:03:22,917
It is a curse...
963
01:03:23,125 --> 01:03:26,083
We are not blessed, we are doomed.
964
01:03:26,250 --> 01:03:27,250
What should we do?
965
01:03:27,542 --> 01:03:28,917
What should we do?
966
01:03:29,208 --> 01:03:29,792
Wait...
967
01:03:29,958 --> 01:03:31,250
Wait...
968
01:03:31,458 --> 01:03:33,708
Throw all the curse sticks away
969
01:03:33,917 --> 01:03:36,083
and replace them with blessing sticks
970
01:03:37,750 --> 01:03:40,375
This time we won't be cursed, try again.
971
01:03:40,625 --> 01:03:42,875
Amida Buddha...
972
01:03:49,250 --> 01:03:50,750
Bastard!
973
01:03:50,958 --> 01:03:53,167
Are you playing tricks on me?
974
01:03:53,375 --> 01:03:54,625
Either give me a curse stick
975
01:03:54,750 --> 01:03:57,208
Or no stick at all.
976
01:03:57,375 --> 01:03:58,875
I pay respect to you and ask for your blessing.
977
01:03:59,083 --> 01:04:00,958
Otherwise I will have burnt down this temple.
978
01:04:01,167 --> 01:04:03,583
So stop playing tricks on me.
979
01:04:03,792 --> 01:04:04,750
Forget it...
980
01:04:04,958 --> 01:04:07,250
We are not superstitious.
981
01:04:09,583 --> 01:04:10,500
Let's go.
982
01:04:10,708 --> 01:04:11,917
Go.
983
01:04:25,042 --> 01:04:27,375
Amida Buddha doesn't bless me this time.
984
01:04:27,542 --> 01:04:30,083
Should I depose the emperor?
985
01:04:32,250 --> 01:04:34,375
Your Majesty.
986
01:04:34,583 --> 01:04:35,375
Where have you been?
987
01:04:35,542 --> 01:04:38,167
I have been waiting for you the whole night.
988
01:04:38,750 --> 01:04:41,333
I just went to the temple.
989
01:04:42,125 --> 01:04:46,042
Your Majesty, do you love me?
990
01:04:46,250 --> 01:04:46,875
I do.
991
01:04:47,125 --> 01:04:50,500
You doesn't mean what you say.
992
01:04:50,708 --> 01:04:51,750
Ask me again.
993
01:04:51,958 --> 01:04:54,750
Your Majesty, do you love me?
994
01:04:55,958 --> 01:04:58,500
You have to think hard.
995
01:04:59,625 --> 01:05:00,417
Your Majesty,
996
01:05:00,625 --> 01:05:03,167
if I have done something wrong,
will you still love me?
997
01:05:03,375 --> 01:05:04,500
I Will.
998
01:05:06,625 --> 01:05:10,625
What if it's a big big mistake?
999
01:05:10,875 --> 01:05:12,833
What is it then?
1000
01:05:13,750 --> 01:05:15,500
Depose you, for example?
1001
01:05:15,750 --> 01:05:17,458
Just an example...
1002
01:05:17,833 --> 01:05:20,500
That's a deadly offence.
I will have to execute your whole clan.
1003
01:05:21,792 --> 01:05:23,417
But I will still love you.
1004
01:05:36,417 --> 01:05:37,458
What are you doing?
1005
01:05:37,917 --> 01:05:40,292
Nothing...l am just covering up my chest...
1006
01:05:40,542 --> 01:05:42,500
My dress has a plunging neckline.
1007
01:05:42,833 --> 01:05:44,250
I like to see the back of your head.
1008
01:05:44,500 --> 01:05:46,417
Turn around.
1009
01:05:48,625 --> 01:05:51,125
In fact you don't have
to send the beautiful concubines
1010
01:05:51,417 --> 01:05:53,167
to work in the kitchen.
1011
01:05:53,375 --> 01:05:56,500
You are the only woman in the palace
1012
01:05:56,708 --> 01:05:58,833
that I really love.
1013
01:06:00,125 --> 01:06:01,875
Are you done with that?
1014
01:06:03,625 --> 01:06:04,958
Are you sweating?
1015
01:06:06,083 --> 01:06:07,125
Yes, Your Majesty.
1016
01:06:07,292 --> 01:06:11,542
I am getting so horny when I see you.
1017
01:06:15,708 --> 01:06:17,583
I am having a fever.
1018
01:06:19,292 --> 01:06:20,917
I come at the wrong time.
1019
01:06:21,583 --> 01:06:24,583
Well, I'll return to my room,
you'd better have some rest.
1020
01:06:24,833 --> 01:06:26,625
Yes, Your Majesty.
1021
01:06:27,125 --> 01:06:29,083
Bye.
1022
01:06:33,542 --> 01:06:37,542
Sister...
1023
01:06:38,208 --> 01:06:39,708
What happened?
1024
01:06:40,083 --> 01:06:41,458
That bastard Taro says
1025
01:06:41,625 --> 01:06:44,625
We must kill Royal Dog
to avenge his brother's murder
1026
01:06:44,917 --> 01:06:46,750
Before he helps us to depose the emperor.
1027
01:06:46,958 --> 01:06:48,333
Let him go and kill Royal Dog himself then.
1028
01:06:48,833 --> 01:06:51,917
But the Royal Secret Guards
are watching over me so tightly.
1029
01:06:52,083 --> 01:06:53,625
How tight?
1030
01:07:06,083 --> 01:07:07,625
What should I do then?
1031
01:07:08,333 --> 01:07:13,500
Brother, do you still remember I learnt Ninjutsu?
1032
01:07:13,708 --> 01:07:17,208
I am a ninja. I can transform too.
1033
01:07:17,417 --> 01:07:18,958
Right.
1034
01:07:19,167 --> 01:07:19,833
So...
1035
01:07:20,083 --> 01:07:23,500
Well, I will go kill Royal Dog.
1036
01:07:23,708 --> 01:07:25,917
Come on...
1037
01:07:26,917 --> 01:07:30,458
Sister, you probably made a mistake.
1038
01:07:31,417 --> 01:07:33,583
Okay! I will transform myself again
1039
01:07:34,958 --> 01:07:36,750
Transform...
1040
01:07:37,083 --> 01:07:38,333
I am on my way.
1041
01:07:39,042 --> 01:07:41,833
Come back soon.
1042
01:07:52,333 --> 01:07:54,750
Once you took my "Frog" poison,
1043
01:07:55,083 --> 01:07:56,375
you will surely die.
1044
01:08:06,083 --> 01:08:07,583
Mr. Dog.
1045
01:08:08,417 --> 01:08:09,625
Who is it?
1046
01:08:13,208 --> 01:08:18,583
Damn it, he ran away.
1047
01:08:21,708 --> 01:08:23,792
Marco Solo!
1048
01:08:23,958 --> 01:08:25,958
Mr. Dog, how are you?
1049
01:08:26,125 --> 01:08:26,833
What did you say?
1050
01:08:27,042 --> 01:08:28,625
How are you?
1051
01:08:28,917 --> 01:08:30,250
Where's the stuff I ordered?
1052
01:08:30,458 --> 01:08:31,792
It's all here.
1053
01:08:31,958 --> 01:08:34,333
Get out.
1054
01:08:38,833 --> 01:08:41,208
Mr. Dog, let me tell you.
1055
01:08:41,375 --> 01:08:44,708
This is called a pistol or,
to use a Chinese translation - the huochong.
1056
01:08:44,917 --> 01:08:47,583
One shot can kill a person.
1057
01:08:48,083 --> 01:08:48,958
What if it misses?
1058
01:08:49,208 --> 01:08:50,958
Then the guy will run away.
1059
01:08:52,833 --> 01:08:56,167
Why didn't they make one
that can fire several shots?
1060
01:08:56,333 --> 01:08:57,750
That is a good idea!
1061
01:08:58,083 --> 01:09:00,042
You think about how to make one yourself.
1062
01:09:02,083 --> 01:09:05,250
Don't point it at yourself,
in case of an accident!
1063
01:09:06,708 --> 01:09:08,042
Really?
1064
01:09:08,333 --> 01:09:10,083
No, don't point it at me.
1065
01:09:12,125 --> 01:09:14,833
Didn't you say it can fire one shot only?
What are you scared of?
1066
01:09:15,958 --> 01:09:17,083
Anything else?
1067
01:09:17,292 --> 01:09:20,208
Mr. Dog, this thing is badly ventilated.
1068
01:09:20,375 --> 01:09:21,208
What is it for?
1069
01:09:21,458 --> 01:09:23,500
To collect oxygen.
1070
01:09:23,833 --> 01:09:26,417
You Chinese know a lot.
1071
01:09:27,333 --> 01:09:28,500
Aren't you Chinese too?
1072
01:09:28,708 --> 01:09:30,833
Don't think that I didn't know you dyed your hair?
1073
01:09:31,083 --> 01:09:33,417
You are Mr. Ma.
1074
01:09:33,583 --> 01:09:35,125
I am mixed-blooded.
1075
01:09:35,292 --> 01:09:36,750
Mixed-blooded...
1076
01:09:36,958 --> 01:09:39,042
Chinese do have lots of inventions.
1077
01:09:40,083 --> 01:09:42,958
In fact, I know almost everything in science.
1078
01:09:43,333 --> 01:09:45,958
Except two.
1079
01:09:46,208 --> 01:09:47,583
Is it about the universe?
1080
01:09:47,750 --> 01:09:48,750
No.
1081
01:09:49,167 --> 01:09:50,167
What is it then?
1082
01:09:50,333 --> 01:09:52,417
Women and love.
1083
01:09:52,625 --> 01:09:53,833
Women and love?
1084
01:09:53,958 --> 01:09:57,625
The Europeans are more romantic than the Chinese.
1085
01:09:57,833 --> 01:09:59,625
If you like a woman...
1086
01:09:59,958 --> 01:10:01,583
you sing a love song to her
1087
01:10:01,833 --> 01:10:03,958
and then kiss her.
1088
01:10:04,208 --> 01:10:06,958
Then she will love you with all her heart.
1089
01:10:07,208 --> 01:10:08,292
Kiss?
1090
01:10:08,458 --> 01:10:09,458
Like this?
1091
01:10:15,500 --> 01:10:18,792
Faithfull, it's so late,
you look as if you are horny...
1092
01:10:18,958 --> 01:10:20,208
What are you doing?
1093
01:10:20,500 --> 01:10:22,625
How's that? Beautiful?
1094
01:10:25,208 --> 01:10:27,250
You must be the foreigner who swindles his money.
1095
01:10:27,417 --> 01:10:28,458
She is your girlfriend?
1096
01:10:28,708 --> 01:10:29,917
Yes.
1097
01:10:30,500 --> 01:10:31,958
His fiancee.
1098
01:10:32,292 --> 01:10:34,625
I am not disturbing you then. Be romantic...
1099
01:10:34,750 --> 01:10:36,208
Bye.
1100
01:10:38,958 --> 01:10:40,500
What's romantic?
1101
01:10:40,625 --> 01:10:42,500
What? Romantic?
1102
01:10:42,958 --> 01:10:45,125
That's a western thing,
how could I know what that is?
1103
01:10:48,375 --> 01:10:49,875
Why do you come here?
1104
01:10:50,250 --> 01:10:52,167
Don't you have to be with your Mr. Handsome?
1105
01:10:53,500 --> 01:10:55,583
Last time I did that on purpose.
1106
01:10:55,792 --> 01:10:59,083
Do I look like a woman of easy virtue?
1107
01:10:59,250 --> 01:11:00,208
You do.
1108
01:11:00,375 --> 01:11:01,750
What did you say?
1109
01:11:05,500 --> 01:11:07,208
I'll kill myself if you don't believe me .
1110
01:11:12,083 --> 01:11:14,500
You look like you are poisoned.
1111
01:11:16,125 --> 01:11:18,083
The chance is coming again.
1112
01:11:18,250 --> 01:11:19,833
Don't cry so loud in the middle of the night.
1113
01:11:19,958 --> 01:11:22,417
People will think that I rape you.
1114
01:11:22,708 --> 01:11:25,125
Get me up... Get me up...
1115
01:11:25,292 --> 01:11:26,125
No.
1116
01:11:26,375 --> 01:11:27,750
Really?
1117
01:11:36,292 --> 01:11:37,958
Come on.
1118
01:11:45,500 --> 01:11:47,917
I will kill you for sure.
1119
01:11:50,167 --> 01:11:52,542
Honey, I want to marry you as soon as possible.
1120
01:11:52,750 --> 01:11:54,750
And have many many kids.
1121
01:11:54,958 --> 01:11:56,750
You look like that you are gonna rape me.
1122
01:11:56,958 --> 01:11:58,583
Are you having a fever?
1123
01:12:07,375 --> 01:12:10,958
Honey, I am home alone...
1124
01:12:11,167 --> 01:12:13,958
I am so lonely and lost...
1125
01:12:14,250 --> 01:12:15,500
I am so cold...
1126
01:12:15,708 --> 01:12:19,208
I want you to hold me and give me warmth...
1127
01:12:19,375 --> 01:12:23,042
Your arms are so strong..
1128
01:12:31,042 --> 01:12:33,542
Have you tried the western way of wooing?
1129
01:12:34,292 --> 01:12:35,750
What western way?
1130
01:12:35,875 --> 01:12:38,083
We have to sing a love song first...
1131
01:12:38,292 --> 01:12:39,167
then kiss...
1132
01:12:39,375 --> 01:12:41,500
Skip the singing part.
1133
01:12:52,625 --> 01:12:53,958
Oh?
1134
01:12:56,750 --> 01:12:57,458
How does it feel?
1135
01:12:57,625 --> 01:12:58,875
A little bit...
1136
01:13:10,833 --> 01:13:11,625
A little bit dizzy.
1137
01:13:11,875 --> 01:13:12,958
There's something else.
1138
01:13:20,750 --> 01:13:21,958
I want to throw up.
1139
01:13:22,167 --> 01:13:24,375
You are enjoying it.
1140
01:13:30,458 --> 01:13:32,958
I have never tried this before.
1141
01:13:38,208 --> 01:13:39,292
Help.
1142
01:13:55,750 --> 01:13:57,708
I am crushed...
1143
01:14:05,958 --> 01:14:07,292
Shit, she recognized me.
1144
01:14:25,208 --> 01:14:27,917
Help.
1145
01:14:31,583 --> 01:14:35,958
Are you gonna many me?
1146
01:14:38,833 --> 01:14:41,167
Don't threaten me now.
1147
01:14:43,083 --> 01:14:45,625
What lies underneath here?
1148
01:14:46,625 --> 01:14:48,583
The drainage system.
1149
01:14:49,083 --> 01:14:51,958
My parents have been smelly for a few days.
1150
01:14:54,583 --> 01:14:55,917
Honey...
1151
01:14:57,167 --> 01:14:58,750
I can't stand it any more.
1152
01:15:01,750 --> 01:15:03,167
It's broken?
1153
01:15:06,583 --> 01:15:08,125
Honey...
1154
01:15:08,292 --> 01:15:10,958
You are going to withdraw from the
competition tomorrow, you can't marry the princess.
1155
01:15:11,333 --> 01:15:13,417
I don't want to marry her at all.
1156
01:15:13,750 --> 01:15:17,292
You are the only one I love.
1157
01:15:17,417 --> 01:15:18,958
It's you who dumped me.
1158
01:15:19,375 --> 01:15:20,417
I...
1159
01:15:20,792 --> 01:15:22,625
I want to be with you...
1160
01:15:22,833 --> 01:15:24,833
romantic...
1161
01:15:25,042 --> 01:15:26,625
What about Mr. Handsome?
1162
01:15:30,417 --> 01:15:33,417
What? You are too cunning.
1163
01:15:34,042 --> 01:15:35,125
My dear honey.
1164
01:15:42,042 --> 01:15:44,083
Your Highness. You look...
1165
01:15:44,250 --> 01:15:46,583
very different today.
1166
01:15:47,083 --> 01:15:52,625
Do you guys like thick lips?
1167
01:15:53,083 --> 01:15:55,833
I heard about that, but no guys...
1168
01:15:56,042 --> 01:15:57,583
like duck lips.
1169
01:15:57,750 --> 01:15:58,958
Shut up.
1170
01:15:59,500 --> 01:16:03,208
This is the second round of the competition.
1171
01:16:03,458 --> 01:16:05,625
Which will decide who the winner is.
1172
01:16:05,833 --> 01:16:09,708
If no one beats Royal Dog,
1173
01:16:09,958 --> 01:16:13,458
he will be the Imperial son-in-law.
1174
01:16:19,625 --> 01:16:22,625
What are you doing?
1175
01:16:22,917 --> 01:16:26,417
Your Majesty, I withdraw from the competition.
1176
01:16:26,625 --> 01:16:27,625
Good luck to all the...
1177
01:16:27,833 --> 01:16:29,417
other contestants.
1178
01:16:29,625 --> 01:16:31,500
All the best.
1179
01:16:31,625 --> 01:16:32,625
Brother, you...
1180
01:16:32,792 --> 01:16:34,625
Brother, do your best.
1181
01:16:36,042 --> 01:16:37,833
What do you mean?
1182
01:16:38,625 --> 01:16:41,042
That's defrauding the Emperor.
1183
01:16:41,417 --> 01:16:44,958
Your Highness, even if I win, I can't marry you.
1184
01:16:45,167 --> 01:16:46,792
Because I already have Faithfull.
1185
01:16:47,042 --> 01:16:48,583
She is good at kung fu
1186
01:16:48,792 --> 01:16:51,208
and loves to serve me, but most importantly...
1187
01:16:51,500 --> 01:16:53,917
I don't have to give her all my salary.
1188
01:16:54,167 --> 01:16:56,583
Royal Dog, do you want
to have your head chopped off?
1189
01:16:57,542 --> 01:17:01,208
Father, can't you let me pick my husband?
1190
01:17:02,333 --> 01:17:03,708
You shut up. Of course not.
1191
01:17:03,958 --> 01:17:05,917
You are the princess.
1192
01:17:06,083 --> 01:17:07,292
How can you say something so silly?
1193
01:17:07,500 --> 01:17:10,208
Guards! Put Royal Dog under arrest.
1194
01:17:10,417 --> 01:17:12,750
Your Majesty,
my brother has been protecting you for years.
1195
01:17:12,958 --> 01:17:13,958
Please pardon him, Your Majesty.
1196
01:17:14,167 --> 01:17:15,625
In accordance with the law,
1197
01:17:15,875 --> 01:17:19,083
Anyone who speaks
for the offender is equally guilty.
1198
01:17:19,792 --> 01:17:21,500
Please pardon me, Your Majesty.
1199
01:17:21,708 --> 01:17:23,167
Put them both in jail.
1200
01:17:24,417 --> 01:17:27,583
Why is it that we have to share the misfortune
but not good luck?
1201
01:17:27,792 --> 01:17:28,833
Take them away!
1202
01:17:29,083 --> 01:17:32,542
Move it! Hurry up...
1203
01:17:37,500 --> 01:17:38,708
Is it over?
1204
01:17:38,917 --> 01:17:41,458
Can we start now?
1205
01:17:44,042 --> 01:17:45,625
Of course.
1206
01:17:46,167 --> 01:17:47,292
Go ahead!
1207
01:17:57,042 --> 01:17:59,958
Old Fool! Have you gone mad?
1208
01:18:00,167 --> 01:18:02,292
Those princes compete among themselves,
1209
01:18:02,500 --> 01:18:05,292
not against your staff.
1210
01:18:06,417 --> 01:18:07,458
You good-for-nothing Emperor!
1211
01:18:08,292 --> 01:18:09,958
Why are you so dumb?
1212
01:18:10,167 --> 01:18:13,583
They do not come for the competition.
They come to depose you.
1213
01:18:13,792 --> 01:18:16,458
Depose me?
1214
01:18:16,958 --> 01:18:19,958
Aren't you Royal Secret Guards all on my side?
1215
01:18:20,375 --> 01:18:23,917
Lock the emperor and the princess up.
1216
01:18:24,083 --> 01:18:27,542
Honey, you'd better go first.
1217
01:18:28,083 --> 01:18:31,458
Sony, I am one of them.
1218
01:18:31,625 --> 01:18:34,708
But honey, I realize now
that I love you very much.
1219
01:18:34,917 --> 01:18:36,750
Bro, can we not depose him?
1220
01:18:37,042 --> 01:18:39,083
Just pretend nothing ever happened.
1221
01:18:39,542 --> 01:18:40,583
Of course...
1222
01:18:40,792 --> 01:18:41,958
Not!
1223
01:18:42,292 --> 01:18:46,625
Let us get ready for the princess' wedding.
1224
01:18:47,625 --> 01:18:49,875
Will the princess marry me?
1225
01:18:50,500 --> 01:18:52,500
Of course...not.
1226
01:18:58,625 --> 01:19:01,042
I am the one
1227
01:19:01,292 --> 01:19:03,042
who will marry the princess.
1228
01:19:05,333 --> 01:19:07,375
No...
1229
01:19:09,542 --> 01:19:11,958
Unicorn, save me.
1230
01:19:12,167 --> 01:19:14,917
Your Majesty, how can I...
1231
01:19:15,167 --> 01:19:17,708
beat them all?
1232
01:19:19,917 --> 01:19:21,750
You are smart.
1233
01:19:26,625 --> 01:19:29,958
But I can arrest you.
1234
01:19:30,917 --> 01:19:34,083
Your brother has committed treason.
1235
01:19:39,708 --> 01:19:41,167
Tyrant!
1236
01:19:41,500 --> 01:19:44,167
You order your Royal Secret Guards
to kill my brother.
1237
01:19:44,708 --> 01:19:47,167
I will now avenge his death.
1238
01:19:47,583 --> 01:19:48,917
Who are you?
1239
01:19:49,083 --> 01:19:51,125
Buddy.
1240
01:19:51,958 --> 01:19:54,208
Good, please sit down.
1241
01:19:54,417 --> 01:19:56,208
But I am not your buddy, Your Majesty.
1242
01:19:56,417 --> 01:19:58,125
So you won't help me?
1243
01:19:58,375 --> 01:20:02,125
No, we won't.
1244
01:20:02,292 --> 01:20:03,333
Guards!
1245
01:20:03,542 --> 01:20:05,625
Prepare for the emperor to be deposed.
1246
01:20:06,167 --> 01:20:07,042
Deposed?
1247
01:20:07,250 --> 01:20:09,875
Father, Lord Unicorn wants to be king.
1248
01:20:11,167 --> 01:20:13,458
Who ever heard of an eunuch being king...
1249
01:20:14,542 --> 01:20:17,625
My Lord, I have thought about this.
1250
01:20:17,833 --> 01:20:20,625
You are the right person to take the throne.
1251
01:20:20,875 --> 01:20:23,167
You are my idol, my Lord.
1252
01:20:23,417 --> 01:20:26,208
I decide to switch sides again and serve you.
1253
01:20:26,417 --> 01:20:27,417
What do you think?
1254
01:20:27,625 --> 01:20:28,542
Great!
1255
01:20:28,750 --> 01:20:31,958
You will be my eunuch when I become king.
1256
01:20:33,292 --> 01:20:34,583
Whom should I marry now?
1257
01:20:34,792 --> 01:20:36,625
You...
1258
01:20:37,125 --> 01:20:38,583
Not you?
1259
01:20:39,083 --> 01:20:42,792
Everyone has to die!
1260
01:20:44,083 --> 01:20:45,083
Father!
1261
01:20:45,792 --> 01:20:47,083
Why is everything changed all in a sudden?
1262
01:20:47,292 --> 01:20:48,917
Taro and the eunuch are in this together.
1263
01:20:49,417 --> 01:20:51,708
Am I good or bad then?
1264
01:20:51,958 --> 01:20:53,583
You are the fool.
1265
01:20:54,583 --> 01:20:56,958
All of you don't give a damn about me.
1266
01:20:57,208 --> 01:20:58,625
I will protect His Majesty!
1267
01:21:01,583 --> 01:21:04,625
Ninja...
1268
01:21:22,750 --> 01:21:23,750
What is this?
1269
01:21:23,958 --> 01:21:26,583
I invent this while killing the fly with a paddle.
1270
01:21:26,875 --> 01:21:27,958
The cyclonic paddle.
1271
01:21:28,167 --> 01:21:29,125
Shit!
1272
01:21:33,958 --> 01:21:35,333
Nuts!
1273
01:21:37,375 --> 01:21:39,625
Who will save me now?
1274
01:21:39,833 --> 01:21:41,792
Those who could have saved you were all
put in jail by Your Majesty.
1275
01:21:41,958 --> 01:21:43,042
I am still here.
1276
01:21:43,458 --> 01:21:45,042
Your humble servant Gemini is here
to protect Your Majesty.
1277
01:21:46,292 --> 01:21:49,083
What? You?
1278
01:21:49,625 --> 01:21:51,250
What a waste!
1279
01:21:51,458 --> 01:21:52,792
You're sometimes man and sometimes woman...
1280
01:21:52,958 --> 01:21:55,042
What can you do?
1281
01:21:55,208 --> 01:21:56,333
I am here as well.
1282
01:21:58,292 --> 01:22:01,167
Miss, who are you?
1283
01:22:01,250 --> 01:22:03,917
My husband is Royal Dog, who is now in jail.
1284
01:22:04,292 --> 01:22:07,250
Are you for or against me?
1285
01:22:07,583 --> 01:22:08,833
I come to protect Your Majesty.
1286
01:22:09,417 --> 01:22:11,625
Welcome...
1287
01:22:12,125 --> 01:22:13,542
Only you two?
1288
01:22:13,708 --> 01:22:17,042
Wrong! The Royal Secret Guards have been preparing
1289
01:22:17,375 --> 01:22:18,917
for something like this in the past ten years,.
1290
01:22:24,333 --> 01:22:26,708
Great! ...
1291
01:22:35,875 --> 01:22:38,500
How could I know there is such a device?
1292
01:22:38,750 --> 01:22:40,125
My hubby told me that.
1293
01:22:40,417 --> 01:22:41,250
Your Majesty, run!
1294
01:22:41,375 --> 01:22:42,500
Where to?
1295
01:22:47,958 --> 01:22:49,542
It's another Royal Dog invention?
1296
01:22:49,750 --> 01:22:52,208
Bring him in, I must reward him!
1297
01:22:53,250 --> 01:22:56,375
You put him in jail a while ago.
1298
01:23:02,375 --> 01:23:03,625
Your Majesty.
1299
01:23:08,917 --> 01:23:11,250
Press the left button.
1300
01:23:12,583 --> 01:23:13,708
Kill you!
1301
01:23:17,542 --> 01:23:19,458
Your Majesty, we've come to save you.
1302
01:23:19,708 --> 01:23:22,958
Your Majesty, don't be scared.
1303
01:23:24,167 --> 01:23:26,250
Your Majesty, you are shocked.
Your Majesty.
1304
01:23:28,417 --> 01:23:30,208
As long as I am still alive, it is okay.
1305
01:23:31,083 --> 01:23:31,917
Where's the princess?
1306
01:23:32,083 --> 01:23:32,792
Your Majesty, my daughter,
1307
01:23:32,958 --> 01:23:35,958
Faithfull and Gemini have taken
the princess to a safe place.
1308
01:23:36,333 --> 01:23:38,833
I know a secret tunnel through
which we can escape.
1309
01:23:39,250 --> 01:23:40,583
-Get moving... -Go...
1310
01:23:40,750 --> 01:23:42,042
Stay where you are...
1311
01:23:44,875 --> 01:23:47,167
See where you people can go...
1312
01:23:47,542 --> 01:23:50,625
Unicorn, as long as we are here.
1313
01:23:50,875 --> 01:23:54,958
You cannot do any harm to the emperor.
1314
01:23:55,167 --> 01:23:58,167
I've heard that you and your wife are
the best kung fu masters in the country.
1315
01:23:58,375 --> 01:24:02,125
It'd be my honour to fight you today.
1316
01:24:04,875 --> 01:24:06,750
Fire kick!
1317
01:24:06,917 --> 01:24:07,792
Fire kick?
1318
01:24:13,375 --> 01:24:14,542
Hurry up.
1319
01:24:22,250 --> 01:24:23,625
Who are you?
1320
01:24:23,958 --> 01:24:26,208
Your Highness, Lord Unicorn has been colluding
with the Japanese.
1321
01:24:26,417 --> 01:24:29,167
My father was murdered because he secured evidence
of Lord Unicorn's collusion with the Japanese.
1322
01:24:29,542 --> 01:24:32,542
Today, besides the princess,
1323
01:24:32,708 --> 01:24:35,125
you two must die.
1324
01:24:35,917 --> 01:24:37,458
That's great.
1325
01:24:38,542 --> 01:24:41,625
That chick who wears man's costume is not bad.
I will have her.
1326
01:24:42,125 --> 01:24:42,958
Okay, we won't kill her.
1327
01:24:43,417 --> 01:24:44,708
What do you mean?
1328
01:24:44,917 --> 01:24:48,292
You won't kill them because they are beautiful,
what about me?
1329
01:24:48,625 --> 01:24:50,167
You deserve to die.
1330
01:24:52,167 --> 01:24:53,208
You are the one who deserves to die.
1331
01:25:02,417 --> 01:25:03,958
Are you done with that?
1332
01:25:36,583 --> 01:25:38,250
Are you two okay?
1333
01:25:44,792 --> 01:25:45,958
You are too horny.
1334
01:25:46,167 --> 01:25:47,583
I just thought of something.
1335
01:25:48,458 --> 01:25:49,833
Shouldn't you be in jail?
1336
01:25:49,958 --> 01:25:51,125
Of course not.
1337
01:25:55,333 --> 01:25:57,625
We laid this mousetrap
with His Majesty to con you guys
1338
01:25:57,833 --> 01:26:00,875
To show yourselves in your true colours.
1339
01:26:02,833 --> 01:26:05,625
What? Those four princes are all fake princes?
1340
01:26:05,875 --> 01:26:07,208
Our information is true.
1341
01:26:07,375 --> 01:26:10,167
So we plead with His Majesty to cooperate with us
1342
01:26:10,375 --> 01:26:12,292
We let them think that His Majesty
is exposed and has no protection.
1343
01:26:12,500 --> 01:26:14,625
They will reveal their true intentions.
1344
01:26:14,958 --> 01:26:17,333
What should I do?
1345
01:26:17,542 --> 01:26:18,542
Your Majesty.
1346
01:26:18,750 --> 01:26:20,917
My parents-in-law are kung-fu masters.
1347
01:26:21,125 --> 01:26:23,500
They will protect Your Majesty.
1348
01:26:25,500 --> 01:26:28,375
Then I will let them protect me.
1349
01:26:28,625 --> 01:26:29,625
Thanks, Your Majesty.
1350
01:26:30,917 --> 01:26:32,333
I just know everything will happen
1351
01:26:32,500 --> 01:26:34,875
in the way I expected it to happen.
1352
01:26:35,083 --> 01:26:37,750
So I came back and saved
His Majesty and Her Highness.
1353
01:26:37,917 --> 01:26:39,250
Royal Dog, you are brilliant.
1354
01:26:39,375 --> 01:26:40,417
Thanks.
1355
01:26:40,750 --> 01:26:42,750
What the hell.
1356
01:26:49,250 --> 01:26:50,292
That's your mom
1357
01:26:50,708 --> 01:26:51,500
and your dad.
1358
01:26:51,708 --> 01:26:54,167
It is.
1359
01:26:56,792 --> 01:26:57,625
You are my buddy.
1360
01:26:57,917 --> 01:27:00,792
Lord Unicorn is a good fighter.
1361
01:27:01,750 --> 01:27:02,750
God-father.
1362
01:27:03,042 --> 01:27:05,708
There's nothing special about them.
1363
01:27:05,875 --> 01:27:07,958
You knew everything now, so what?
1364
01:27:08,250 --> 01:27:09,875
Can you beat us?
1365
01:27:11,208 --> 01:27:12,625
Your Highness.
1366
01:27:14,250 --> 01:27:15,875
So what?!
1367
01:27:22,375 --> 01:27:23,833
How dare you hit Her Highness!
1368
01:27:34,458 --> 01:27:36,542
You have to fight me then.
1369
01:27:36,708 --> 01:27:37,792
Okay.
1370
01:27:39,042 --> 01:27:41,375
My dear future son-in-law, you'll lose
1371
01:27:41,542 --> 01:27:42,708
Please leave with His Majesty.
1372
01:27:42,833 --> 01:27:43,500
Okay.
1373
01:27:43,625 --> 01:27:44,750
So cold blooded!
1374
01:28:08,250 --> 01:28:09,500
-You... -Painful?
1375
01:28:11,625 --> 01:28:13,958
Hey, you have an extra hole on your ass...
1376
01:28:14,167 --> 01:28:15,125
Why don't you surrender?
1377
01:28:15,333 --> 01:28:16,958
I have been practicing martial arts for years.
1378
01:28:17,333 --> 01:28:20,292
Don't you think I have a master move?
1379
01:28:20,625 --> 01:28:22,125
Watch it carefully.
1380
01:28:22,375 --> 01:28:23,750
My master move.
1381
01:28:25,125 --> 01:28:26,583
Run for my life.
1382
01:28:31,958 --> 01:28:33,875
Your Majesty...
1383
01:28:34,083 --> 01:28:36,292
I just pretended to be on their side...
1384
01:28:36,542 --> 01:28:38,125
so as to expose and apprehend them.
1385
01:28:38,333 --> 01:28:41,583
Will Your Majesty be so kind as to take me back?
1386
01:28:41,792 --> 01:28:43,875
Please forgive me.
1387
01:28:44,125 --> 01:28:45,500
Take you back?
1388
01:28:45,625 --> 01:28:46,792
I can, but...
1389
01:28:46,958 --> 01:28:48,125
Forgive you?
1390
01:28:48,625 --> 01:28:49,417
No way.
1391
01:28:49,583 --> 01:28:50,250
Guards!
1392
01:28:50,500 --> 01:28:52,333
Beat him up...
1393
01:29:13,708 --> 01:29:14,792
It's my turn.
1394
01:29:33,583 --> 01:29:34,958
If you are gentlemen and play fair...
1395
01:29:35,208 --> 01:29:38,083
Then fight me one on one like a man.
1396
01:29:40,375 --> 01:29:41,833
We are not gentlemen and,
1397
01:29:42,042 --> 01:29:43,417
we won't play fair.
1398
01:29:48,250 --> 01:29:50,292
Piggy Shooting star!
1399
01:29:55,458 --> 01:29:56,750
Done.
1400
01:30:06,833 --> 01:30:08,625
Thank you, parents-in-law.
1401
01:30:08,833 --> 01:30:10,250
You'd better go for late supper.
1402
01:30:10,750 --> 01:30:12,875
Okay...
1403
01:30:17,875 --> 01:30:19,875
What is this?
1404
01:30:28,417 --> 01:30:29,542
Try this.
1405
01:30:41,917 --> 01:30:44,333
Nothing to hit.
1406
01:30:45,750 --> 01:30:48,250
Yeah, I don't have.
1407
01:31:01,792 --> 01:31:04,708
I jumped too high and scared
the hell out of myself.
1408
01:31:04,958 --> 01:31:07,750
Mighty Icy Palm!
1409
01:31:08,250 --> 01:31:10,375
Powerful Fire ball!
1410
01:31:18,792 --> 01:31:19,750
You still want to fight me?
1411
01:31:19,958 --> 01:31:22,625
Alright, I will burn you into BBQ pork.
1412
01:31:28,125 --> 01:31:29,375
BBQ Me?
1413
01:31:31,042 --> 01:31:33,250
Do you think my hand is BBQ meat?
1414
01:31:36,833 --> 01:31:38,292
Fire kick!
1415
01:31:38,750 --> 01:31:40,250
Honey, watch out.
1416
01:31:41,875 --> 01:31:45,333
Mighty Fire wheel!
1417
01:31:45,708 --> 01:31:47,250
Fire wheel?
1418
01:31:52,042 --> 01:31:55,750
Honey, that's enough, it wouldn't be suitable
for children if you keep doing that.
1419
01:31:58,625 --> 01:31:59,875
Lucky I did not burn you alive.
1420
01:32:01,625 --> 01:32:04,250
Shit! It's burnt.
1421
01:32:07,625 --> 01:32:09,750
My last move.
1422
01:32:10,125 --> 01:32:11,167
Last move?
1423
01:32:11,375 --> 01:32:13,833
Lightning drill!
1424
01:32:18,542 --> 01:32:19,875
Where's he gone?
1425
01:32:23,542 --> 01:32:25,833
Lightning drill is awesome.
1426
01:32:28,375 --> 01:32:29,625
Honey, are you okay?
1427
01:32:29,875 --> 01:32:31,083
I can't pull my hand out.
1428
01:32:32,625 --> 01:32:37,375
Want to ruin my face?
I have drilled through the armour
1429
01:32:44,417 --> 01:32:46,500
There's only one bullet in a pistol.
1430
01:32:46,708 --> 01:32:49,833
If you can't kill me with the one and only bullet,
you will be dead.
1431
01:32:49,958 --> 01:32:52,542
Well, then...Run!
1432
01:33:01,458 --> 01:33:04,583
Let's see if my machine gun can kill you or not.
1433
01:33:04,792 --> 01:33:06,958
See my new invention.
1434
01:33:07,208 --> 01:33:10,333
The perfect machine gun. Always hits the target!
1435
01:33:11,792 --> 01:33:13,625
What's this?
1436
01:33:28,958 --> 01:33:31,083
Honey, you are so cool.
1437
01:33:31,625 --> 01:33:32,917
Really?
1438
01:33:35,250 --> 01:33:40,625
I don't deserve to be killed by guys like you.
1439
01:33:41,333 --> 01:33:43,417
You deserve to die, right?
1440
01:33:51,083 --> 01:33:52,458
Again?
1441
01:33:59,083 --> 01:34:01,583
What can you do to me?
1442
01:34:06,042 --> 01:34:10,375
Really? l jump...
1443
01:34:11,333 --> 01:34:11,958
It's done.
1444
01:34:14,625 --> 01:34:18,458
Royal Tiger! Attention!
1445
01:34:18,750 --> 01:34:19,833
Your Majesty
1446
01:34:20,750 --> 01:34:22,958
I will make you the Head
of all Royal Secret Guards.
1447
01:34:23,208 --> 01:34:24,542
Stay by me 24 hours per day, 7 days per week.
1448
01:34:24,792 --> 01:34:25,958
Thanks, Your Majesty.
1449
01:34:26,125 --> 01:34:27,708
And I will make you my son-in-law!
1450
01:34:27,958 --> 01:34:30,708
Let's pick a good day for you
to marry Princess Rainbow.
1451
01:34:36,917 --> 01:34:37,958
Well...
1452
01:34:38,167 --> 01:34:40,125
please help me.
1453
01:34:40,333 --> 01:34:43,083
No one would marry her except you.
1454
01:34:43,292 --> 01:34:44,583
Thanks, Your Majesty.
1455
01:34:44,708 --> 01:34:47,292
Clement! Clementine! Attention!
1456
01:34:47,833 --> 01:34:50,958
You two have saved me,
I will grant you two the title of
1457
01:34:51,167 --> 01:34:53,958
The Glorious Couple.
1458
01:34:54,250 --> 01:34:57,083
You could travel throughout the country for free.
1459
01:34:57,292 --> 01:35:00,625
Royal Dog! Attention!
1460
01:35:00,875 --> 01:35:03,458
Your Majesty, he and my daughter
1461
01:35:03,708 --> 01:35:04,750
are already gone.
1462
01:35:10,833 --> 01:35:13,250
This is so romantic.
1463
01:35:13,750 --> 01:35:15,292
We will have lots of kids
1464
01:35:15,500 --> 01:35:17,708
on this kite.
1465
01:35:17,958 --> 01:35:20,583
Faithfull, I know you are horny.
1466
01:35:20,750 --> 01:35:22,583
But I spent lots of money in making this kite.
1467
01:35:22,750 --> 01:35:24,917
If it is damaged,
I can't afford to make another one.
1468
01:35:25,125 --> 01:35:27,500
Unless I can get a few more sponsors...
1469
01:35:27,750 --> 01:35:28,500
then we can do whatever you want on this kite.
1470
01:35:28,625 --> 01:35:29,958
Come and take a look.
1471
01:35:30,042 --> 01:35:31,583
Royal Dog loves Girlie's Red Wine
and Old Man Pizza.
1472
01:35:31,625 --> 01:35:33,583
No need to look.
1473
01:35:33,625 --> 01:35:35,125
Faithfull is using MJ skin care products.
1474
01:35:42,042 --> 01:35:43,792
Royal Dog.
1475
01:35:44,417 --> 01:35:46,417
What? Ninja again?
1476
01:35:51,542 --> 01:35:52,583
You are...
1477
01:35:52,792 --> 01:35:54,917
It's me, Gemini.
1478
01:35:55,083 --> 01:35:57,292
Faithfull, he is such a nice guy...
1479
01:35:57,583 --> 01:35:59,542
I won't let you have him so easily.
1480
01:35:59,792 --> 01:36:02,625
Royal Dog, I fancy you so much.
1481
01:36:03,917 --> 01:36:05,167
Looks good.
1482
01:36:05,417 --> 01:36:06,625
Don't look!
1483
01:36:07,125 --> 01:36:08,167
Wanna steal my hubby?
1484
01:36:08,333 --> 01:36:09,750
I am gonna kill you.
96682
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.