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Subtitles by explosiveskull
www.OpenSubtitles.org
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Good evening.
I welcome you to the third
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00:00:17,644 --> 00:00:19,846
and final of the 2016
presidential debates.
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00:00:19,880 --> 00:00:22,149
We either have
a country, or we don't.
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00:00:22,182 --> 00:00:23,917
Rounding up
people who are undocumented...
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00:00:23,950 --> 00:00:25,052
We have some bad hombres here.
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00:00:25,085 --> 00:00:26,454
...is an idea
that is not in keeping
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00:00:26,487 --> 00:00:28,989
- with who we are as a nation.
- I tell it like it is.
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I'm happy to compare
my 30 years of experience...
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00:00:30,891 --> 00:00:31,958
The one thing you have
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00:00:31,992 --> 00:00:33,894
over me is experience,
but it's bad experience.
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00:00:33,927 --> 00:00:35,862
We are going to make
America great again,
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00:00:35,896 --> 00:00:37,831
and it has to start now.
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I hope you will
give me a chance
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00:00:39,699 --> 00:00:41,101
to serve as your president.
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00:00:41,134 --> 00:00:43,170
Donald Trump
told the American people
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00:00:43,203 --> 00:00:45,839
the truth tonight,
as he always does.
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00:00:45,872 --> 00:00:48,175
Hillary Clinton
is the real outsider.
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00:00:48,208 --> 00:00:50,677
Look, whatever you think
you saw tonight...
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00:00:50,710 --> 00:00:52,712
You didn't.
You actually saw what I saw,
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00:00:52,746 --> 00:00:53,980
and I think that
the American people...
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00:00:54,014 --> 00:00:54,981
Would agree with me.
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00:00:55,015 --> 00:00:57,017
As long as I say it
repeatedly, doggedly...
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00:00:57,050 --> 00:00:59,386
And with unearned confidence.
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00:00:59,420 --> 00:01:01,688
I lie.
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00:01:01,721 --> 00:01:02,956
I am lying to you.
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00:01:02,989 --> 00:01:04,024
And you know I lie.
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00:01:04,057 --> 00:01:05,725
I'm actually in this position
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00:01:05,759 --> 00:01:08,095
because of how effectively
I lie to you.
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00:01:08,128 --> 00:01:09,663
Are we clear?
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00:01:09,696 --> 00:01:11,164
We call this the spin room,
without shame.
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00:01:11,198 --> 00:01:14,134
Spinning is something you do
to disorient people.
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00:01:14,167 --> 00:01:16,837
And you all know that,
and yet here we are.
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00:01:16,870 --> 00:01:18,772
What a wonderful play
we're putting on.
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00:01:18,805 --> 00:01:20,107
Thank you all so much.
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00:01:20,140 --> 00:01:21,675
And fuck you, America.
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00:01:21,708 --> 00:01:23,777
I look forward to lying to you
in the future.
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00:01:23,810 --> 00:01:24,945
See you at the bar.
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00:01:24,978 --> 00:01:27,147
Thank you.
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00:01:46,166 --> 00:01:47,435
Shockwaves across America.
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00:01:47,468 --> 00:01:48,802
His surprise victory
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00:01:48,835 --> 00:01:50,003
defied preelection polling.
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00:01:50,036 --> 00:01:51,204
Tectonic-plate-shifting,
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00:01:51,238 --> 00:01:53,006
9.5 on the Richter scale
earthquake.
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00:01:53,039 --> 00:01:54,442
So that's just a snapshot
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00:01:54,475 --> 00:01:55,942
of the reaction
we're getting this morning.
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00:01:55,976 --> 00:01:57,210
And we're still trying to get
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00:01:57,244 --> 00:01:59,846
our good old pal Gary Zimmer
to talk to us.
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00:01:59,880 --> 00:02:01,848
He's probably
halfway to Canada by now.
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00:02:01,882 --> 00:02:03,750
Yeah,
maybe halfway to Canadian Club.
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00:02:03,783 --> 00:02:06,153
I'd love to ask this guy
what the hell he was thinking.
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00:02:06,186 --> 00:02:08,155
How did they blow
this election?
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00:02:08,188 --> 00:02:10,223
Hey, guys, did you find the clip?
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00:02:10,257 --> 00:02:11,892
You got it? Okay.
55
00:02:11,925 --> 00:02:13,727
This is our good friend
Gary Zimmer,
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00:02:13,760 --> 00:02:16,163
grand old consigliere
of the Clinton campaign,
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00:02:16,196 --> 00:02:19,166
not even a week ago
on this program.
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00:02:19,199 --> 00:02:21,067
So, you're confident?
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00:02:21,101 --> 00:02:22,302
Oh, no question.
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00:02:22,335 --> 00:02:24,037
Hillary's made her case.
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00:02:24,070 --> 00:02:27,040
She is the most qualified
presidential candidate,
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00:02:27,073 --> 00:02:28,775
certainly in my lifetime,
maybe ever.
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00:02:28,808 --> 00:02:30,478
Donald Trump
will not be president.
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00:02:30,511 --> 00:02:32,946
Well, he is
doing well in the South,
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00:02:32,979 --> 00:02:35,715
so maybe he can be president
of the Confederacy.
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00:02:35,749 --> 00:02:37,918
But Ohio,
Michigan, Pennsylvania.
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00:02:37,951 --> 00:02:39,753
Mika, he's not winning
Pennsylvania.
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00:02:39,786 --> 00:02:41,087
He's not winning Michigan.
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00:02:41,121 --> 00:02:44,057
That rust belt blue wall
is impenetrable. It holds.
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00:02:44,090 --> 00:02:45,292
I guarantee.
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00:02:45,325 --> 00:02:47,027
Well, you decided to spend
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00:02:47,060 --> 00:02:48,496
almost no time there
campaigning.
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00:02:48,529 --> 00:02:50,096
Was that a Carville impression?
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00:02:50,130 --> 00:02:51,932
All right, so wait a minute.
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00:02:51,965 --> 00:02:53,800
- Tommy, try Gary again.
- Google, off.
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00:02:53,833 --> 00:02:55,769
Okay, we have
Faith Brewster on the line...
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00:02:55,802 --> 00:02:56,903
Hey, Google, off.
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00:02:56,937 --> 00:02:58,805
Sorry. Power controls
is not yet supported.
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00:02:58,838 --> 00:03:00,307
Phone lady, decline.
80
00:03:00,340 --> 00:03:02,342
- Try asking again in a different way.
- Ugh.
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00:03:02,375 --> 00:03:04,945
Hang up. Hey, Google,
tell phone lady to hang up.
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00:03:04,978 --> 00:03:06,947
Sorry, I'm not sure
how to help with that yet.
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00:03:06,980 --> 00:03:08,915
- Off, off!
- Sorry, I'm still not sure about that.
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00:03:08,949 --> 00:03:10,050
Hey, Google, disengage.
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00:03:10,083 --> 00:03:11,184
- Songs aren't available on SiriusXM.
- Abort.
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00:03:11,218 --> 00:03:12,453
- I'm not sure about that.
- Everybody, shut up!
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00:03:12,486 --> 00:03:15,088
Try asking again in a different way.
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00:03:15,121 --> 00:03:18,124
("Still the Same" by Bob Segerpl
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00:03:34,040 --> 00:03:35,976
♪ You always won ♪
90
00:03:36,009 --> 00:03:38,878
♪ Every time you placed a bet ♪
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00:03:41,248 --> 00:03:43,750
♪ You're still damn good ♪
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00:03:45,018 --> 00:03:47,754
♪ No one's gotten to you yet ♪
93
00:03:50,123 --> 00:03:52,125
♪ Every time ♪
94
00:03:52,158 --> 00:03:55,929
♪ They were sure
they had you caught ♪
95
00:03:55,962 --> 00:03:59,766
♪ You were quicker
than they thought ♪
96
00:04:01,134 --> 00:04:05,338
♪ You'd just turn your back
and walk ♪
97
00:04:05,372 --> 00:04:08,875
♪ And you're still the same ♪
98
00:04:08,908 --> 00:04:11,344
♪ I caught up with you
yesterday ♪
99
00:04:11,378 --> 00:04:14,114
♪ Still the same,
still the same ♪
100
00:04:14,147 --> 00:04:16,149
♪ Moving game to game ♪
101
00:04:17,451 --> 00:04:20,920
♪ No one standing in your way ♪
102
00:04:22,188 --> 00:04:26,427
♪ Turning on the charm
long enough ♪
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00:04:26,460 --> 00:04:28,194
♪ To get you by ♪
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00:04:28,228 --> 00:04:30,096
♪ Still the same ♪
105
00:04:30,130 --> 00:04:31,264
♪ Still the same ♪
106
00:04:31,298 --> 00:04:33,900
♪ You're still the same ♪
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00:04:35,068 --> 00:04:40,073
♪ You still aim high ♪
108
00:04:44,478 --> 00:04:48,214
♪ Still the same,
still the same ♪
109
00:04:52,352 --> 00:04:55,955
♪ Still the same,
still the same. ♪
110
00:05:20,246 --> 00:05:25,085
♪ There's been a load
of compromisin' ♪
111
00:05:25,118 --> 00:05:29,356
♪ On the road to my horizon ♪
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00:05:29,389 --> 00:05:32,392
♪ But I'm gonna be
where the lights ♪
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00:05:32,426 --> 00:05:36,497
♪ Are shinin' on me ♪
114
00:05:36,530 --> 00:05:40,133
♪ Like a rhinestone cowboy ♪
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00:05:42,001 --> 00:05:47,107
♪ Riding out on a horse
in a star-spangled rodeo ♪
116
00:05:49,109 --> 00:05:51,945
♪ Like a rhinestone cowboy ♪
117
00:05:54,147 --> 00:05:59,319
♪ Getting cards and letters
from people I don't even know ♪
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00:06:01,154 --> 00:06:06,126
♪ And offers comin'
over the phone. ♪
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00:06:13,166 --> 00:06:15,403
So, if there is
no further discussion,
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00:06:15,436 --> 00:06:18,472
can I get a motion to vote
on Resolution 1217,
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00:06:18,506 --> 00:06:22,142
requiring a valid
Wisconsin driver's license
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00:06:22,175 --> 00:06:25,145
or proof of U.S. citizenship
to qualify
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00:06:25,178 --> 00:06:28,314
for any state or municipality
program or benefit,
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00:06:28,348 --> 00:06:32,185
such as food stamps, welfare
and so on and so forth.
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00:06:32,218 --> 00:06:33,353
So moved.
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00:06:33,386 --> 00:06:34,422
- Second?
- Second.
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00:06:34,455 --> 00:06:36,156
I have a second.
It is time...
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00:06:36,189 --> 00:06:38,091
- Excuse me, fellas.
- Jack, I already told you,
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00:06:38,124 --> 00:06:39,560
you can widen that easement
on Hamburg...
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00:06:39,593 --> 00:06:42,162
Um, actually, it's about
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00:06:42,195 --> 00:06:44,432
that resolution
you're thinking about passing.
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00:06:44,465 --> 00:06:47,468
With all due respect, Colonel,
that discussion has ended.
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00:06:47,501 --> 00:06:49,302
Yeah, yeah. So I heard.
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00:06:49,335 --> 00:06:51,237
But, uh...
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00:06:51,271 --> 00:06:53,507
the thing is that, um...
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00:06:53,541 --> 00:06:55,509
it's a bad idea.
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00:06:55,543 --> 00:06:57,977
- Y-You can't...
- Uh, okay, well,
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00:06:58,011 --> 00:06:59,447
I already seconded,
but whatever.
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00:06:59,480 --> 00:07:01,582
I know we're in
a bad spot, but...
140
00:07:01,615 --> 00:07:03,283
you can't bring it back
141
00:07:03,316 --> 00:07:05,318
by throwing these people
under the bus.
142
00:07:05,351 --> 00:07:08,087
Whoa, we're not throwing
anybody under anything, Jack.
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00:07:08,121 --> 00:07:09,557
Money was tight
144
00:07:09,590 --> 00:07:12,258
when the base was still open,
but now...
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00:07:12,292 --> 00:07:14,194
I mean, we just
got to be smart.
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00:07:14,227 --> 00:07:16,196
We got to eliminate
cheating the programs.
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00:07:16,229 --> 00:07:18,532
There's not a damn soul
using those programs
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00:07:18,566 --> 00:07:20,468
that doesn't need 'em,
and you know it.
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00:07:20,501 --> 00:07:23,437
And all they need to do
is produce the acceptable I.D.,
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00:07:23,471 --> 00:07:24,772
and the benefits will be...
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00:07:24,805 --> 00:07:26,540
And you know
they can't do that.
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00:07:26,574 --> 00:07:29,410
Well...
I don't make the rules, Jack.
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00:07:31,211 --> 00:07:33,313
I mean, I do, I guess.
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00:07:33,346 --> 00:07:36,417
Not by myself, but...
this is over.
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00:07:39,252 --> 00:07:41,422
Okay, we have a motion
that has been seconded.
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00:07:41,455 --> 00:07:43,491
It is time to bring it
to a vote.
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00:07:43,524 --> 00:07:45,325
Uh, you know, uh,
just curious...
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00:07:45,358 --> 00:07:47,528
you know,
when the river backed up
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00:07:47,561 --> 00:07:49,497
and the folks
you think might be cheating
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00:07:49,530 --> 00:07:52,031
stood shoulder to shoulder
with us
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00:07:52,065 --> 00:07:55,503
stuffing sandbags
for three days straight,
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00:07:55,536 --> 00:07:58,506
ended up saving your store,
you check their I.D.'s then?
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00:07:58,539 --> 00:08:00,240
Discussion's closed, Jack.
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00:08:00,273 --> 00:08:02,141
You checking I.D.'s
when they're bringing food
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00:08:02,175 --> 00:08:04,277
to the church potlucks, Walt?
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00:08:05,345 --> 00:08:06,614
Enough, Jack.
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00:08:06,647 --> 00:08:08,415
You had your say.
168
00:08:12,218 --> 00:08:14,187
Look, we got rules here,
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00:08:14,220 --> 00:08:15,823
but that don't make us
bad people.
170
00:08:15,856 --> 00:08:18,258
I'm not saying
you're a bad person, Billy.
171
00:08:18,291 --> 00:08:20,494
I'm saying you're scared.
172
00:08:20,528 --> 00:08:22,596
Hell, we all are.
173
00:08:22,630 --> 00:08:27,200
Damn town went from 15,000
to five overnight,
174
00:08:27,233 --> 00:08:29,335
and business went with it.
175
00:08:29,369 --> 00:08:33,172
We're not bringing it back
by... by turning on each other.
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00:08:34,173 --> 00:08:35,543
Corps taught me the chain's
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00:08:35,576 --> 00:08:38,144
only as strong
as its weakest link.
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00:08:38,177 --> 00:08:41,114
And Father Heuvel here
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00:08:41,147 --> 00:08:43,283
taught me that I am
my brother's keeper.
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00:08:43,316 --> 00:08:45,151
Wait. Go back
to that "weak link" part.
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00:08:45,184 --> 00:08:47,320
Whatever you do for the least
of us, you do for the Lord.
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00:08:47,353 --> 00:08:48,489
Yeah, okay. Yeah.
183
00:08:48,522 --> 00:08:50,323
I mean, could this guy work?
184
00:08:50,356 --> 00:08:51,625
Corps taught me the chain's
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00:08:51,659 --> 00:08:54,093
only as strong
as its weakest link.
186
00:08:54,127 --> 00:08:55,529
Hmm. Pretty good.
187
00:08:55,563 --> 00:08:58,131
- Mm-hmm.
- And Father Heuvel here
188
00:08:58,164 --> 00:09:00,366
taught me that I am
my brother's keeper.
189
00:09:00,401 --> 00:09:03,202
Whatever you do for the least
of us, you do for the Lord.
190
00:09:03,236 --> 00:09:05,506
Looks conservative,
sounds progressive.
191
00:09:05,539 --> 00:09:08,241
- Mm-hmm.
- The point is,
192
00:09:08,274 --> 00:09:12,312
it's easy to be strong
of character in the good times.
193
00:09:12,345 --> 00:09:14,648
The test is the bad times.
194
00:09:14,682 --> 00:09:17,885
If you can't live
your principles then, well...
195
00:09:17,918 --> 00:09:21,220
I guess they aren't principles;
they're just hobbies.
196
00:09:22,523 --> 00:09:23,657
Where is this again?
197
00:09:23,691 --> 00:09:25,124
Wisconsin.
198
00:09:25,158 --> 00:09:27,293
Deerlaken.
199
00:09:27,327 --> 00:09:29,730
- Deerlaken.
- Mm-hmm.
200
00:09:29,763 --> 00:09:31,331
Gentlemen...
201
00:09:31,364 --> 00:09:34,133
this square-jawed paragon
of Americana
202
00:09:34,167 --> 00:09:38,237
is our goddamn key
back into the forbidden city.
203
00:09:38,271 --> 00:09:40,139
- Well, that's my stop.
- Sit. Kurt, sit.
204
00:09:40,173 --> 00:09:41,508
- Call me when he gets to the point.
- Nope.
205
00:09:41,542 --> 00:09:42,643
You're not going anywhere.
No, sit.
206
00:09:42,676 --> 00:09:44,143
And we have Alan to thank
207
00:09:44,177 --> 00:09:45,913
for bringing this man
to our attention.
208
00:09:45,946 --> 00:09:48,415
- It's Evan.
- Did I happen to mention that
209
00:09:48,449 --> 00:09:50,417
he is a veteran of
the United States Marine Corps?
210
00:09:50,451 --> 00:09:52,453
- Yes.
- And a farmer.
211
00:09:52,486 --> 00:09:53,520
- Um... you did.
- I believe so.
212
00:09:53,554 --> 00:09:55,288
And did I happen to mention
that he's a widower?
213
00:09:55,321 --> 00:09:56,189
- Impressive.
- All right. Well done.
214
00:09:56,222 --> 00:09:57,524
A man who makes Joe the Plumber
215
00:09:57,558 --> 00:09:59,225
look like Dukakis in mom jeans
216
00:09:59,258 --> 00:10:01,194
and a fucking Easter bonnet...
217
00:10:01,227 --> 00:10:02,630
in the reddest of counties
218
00:10:02,663 --> 00:10:05,766
- in the great now swing state of Wisconsin...
- Mm-hmm.
219
00:10:05,799 --> 00:10:07,233
...is...
220
00:10:08,535 --> 00:10:10,537
...a Democrat.
221
00:10:10,571 --> 00:10:12,372
Uh, he's a Democrat?
222
00:10:12,406 --> 00:10:13,641
Yeah.
223
00:10:13,674 --> 00:10:15,609
He just doesn't know it yet.
224
00:10:15,643 --> 00:10:17,711
Well, here's the idea:
I get on a plane,
225
00:10:17,745 --> 00:10:20,614
and I go to Wisconsin,
and I use this guy
226
00:10:20,648 --> 00:10:23,517
to road-test a more
rural-friendly message.
227
00:10:23,550 --> 00:10:26,754
It's a mayoral race...
in the middle of nowhere.
228
00:10:26,787 --> 00:10:28,656
Uh, I don't get
how this helps us.
229
00:10:28,689 --> 00:10:31,324
There are two million rural
votes in these states alone.
230
00:10:31,357 --> 00:10:33,427
If we lost them 2.7 to one
instead of three to one,
231
00:10:33,460 --> 00:10:35,596
we'd win,
but we didn't even try.
232
00:10:35,629 --> 00:10:37,296
Their base turned out.
Ours didn't.
233
00:10:37,330 --> 00:10:40,333
If we find a candidate
to activate our base...
234
00:10:40,366 --> 00:10:43,369
if our African Americans
235
00:10:43,404 --> 00:10:44,538
and Latino communities...
236
00:10:44,571 --> 00:10:45,539
It's just "Latino."
237
00:10:45,572 --> 00:10:47,741
...show up, we win.
238
00:10:47,775 --> 00:10:50,276
We have to get the rural voters
back into the tent,
239
00:10:50,309 --> 00:10:51,412
even just a little bit.
240
00:10:51,445 --> 00:10:52,980
Well, if it's all
the same to you,
241
00:10:53,013 --> 00:10:54,114
I'll stick with pandering
242
00:10:54,148 --> 00:10:58,485
to our special-interest groups,
thank you very much.
243
00:10:58,519 --> 00:11:02,690
Sí, se puede. Sí, se puede.
244
00:11:02,723 --> 00:11:05,693
- Sí, se...
- I like the idea of expanding our base.
245
00:11:05,726 --> 00:11:08,696
Not taking any voter
for granted.
246
00:11:09,730 --> 00:11:10,998
It does have some merit.
247
00:11:14,535 --> 00:11:15,301
Good morning.
Gary Zimmer's office.
248
00:11:15,334 --> 00:11:16,570
Okay, so we'll make sure
249
00:11:16,603 --> 00:11:18,237
a car comes here
and picks you up,
250
00:11:18,271 --> 00:11:19,707
- and we'll make sure the driver is Frank.
- Okay.
251
00:11:19,740 --> 00:11:21,307
Um, it's a two-hour flight,
252
00:11:21,340 --> 00:11:22,743
but you'll gain an hour
when you get there.
253
00:11:22,776 --> 00:11:25,479
- What is that?
- The 7 Series.
254
00:11:25,512 --> 00:11:28,247
It was the closest thing
they had to your Tesla, but...
255
00:11:28,281 --> 00:11:30,283
Just take a Sharpie, and write
"liberal city douchebag"
256
00:11:30,316 --> 00:11:31,452
on my forehead, okay?
257
00:11:31,485 --> 00:11:32,786
- Come on, guys.
- Yeah.
258
00:11:32,820 --> 00:11:34,455
Um, Accord?
259
00:11:34,488 --> 00:11:35,756
I'm traveling to America.
260
00:11:35,789 --> 00:11:37,725
Explorer, neutral color.
261
00:11:37,758 --> 00:11:39,392
And pack me like a conference.
262
00:11:39,426 --> 00:11:40,494
Davos? TED?
263
00:11:40,527 --> 00:11:42,029
Aspen, weekend package.
264
00:11:42,062 --> 00:11:43,530
- Thank you.
- Great.
265
00:11:43,564 --> 00:11:44,732
Oh, and, guys, you know what?
266
00:11:44,765 --> 00:11:46,467
Keep it simple.
267
00:11:46,500 --> 00:11:47,601
Simple. No frills.
268
00:11:47,634 --> 00:11:48,802
- Thank you.
- Got it. - Sure.
269
00:11:48,836 --> 00:11:50,336
Great.
270
00:11:50,369 --> 00:11:52,806
Although, if the Explorer
has a-a Bose
271
00:11:52,840 --> 00:11:54,608
or a Bang & Olufsen
sound package,
272
00:11:54,641 --> 00:11:56,543
- if they have it...
- it'd be good.
273
00:11:56,577 --> 00:11:58,746
- Great.
- Gotcha.
274
00:11:58,779 --> 00:12:01,314
Did they say anything
about catering?
275
00:12:01,347 --> 00:12:02,616
Not yet.
276
00:12:02,649 --> 00:12:04,317
Those little mozzarella balls
would be great.
277
00:12:04,350 --> 00:12:05,586
- Yeah?
- Caprese salad.
278
00:12:05,619 --> 00:12:06,887
- Something light. Balsamic.
- Yeah, just...
279
00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:08,455
Balsamic, all that jazz?
280
00:12:08,489 --> 00:12:09,823
Cool.
281
00:12:13,727 --> 00:12:14,795
Nothing.
282
00:12:14,828 --> 00:12:16,329
Cool.
283
00:12:16,362 --> 00:12:18,599
That's fun.
284
00:12:20,734 --> 00:12:22,069
He'll flip the short pass.
285
00:12:22,102 --> 00:12:23,804
Complete to Anderson.
He's at the 35.
286
00:12:23,837 --> 00:12:25,439
He moves to the 30-yard line...
287
00:12:25,472 --> 00:12:27,306
- Here you go, Mr. Zimmer.
- Oh, thank you.
288
00:12:27,340 --> 00:12:28,609
Trailing by three points...
289
00:12:28,642 --> 00:12:29,910
- Thanks.
- Mm-hmm.
290
00:12:29,943 --> 00:12:33,881
...with time running out,
the Packers roll 68 yards
291
00:12:33,914 --> 00:12:37,484
across the frozen field
and into legend.
292
00:12:38,919 --> 00:12:40,554
He flips
the pass. It's complete.
293
00:12:40,587 --> 00:12:42,523
To Chuck Mercein.
He's at the 25, the 20...
294
00:12:42,556 --> 00:12:44,725
With only
three minutes to play,
295
00:12:44,758 --> 00:12:47,728
all the hopes and dreams
of an entire season
296
00:12:47,761 --> 00:12:50,396
rested on the shoulders
of one man.
297
00:12:50,430 --> 00:12:53,801
♪ Like a rhinestone cowboy ♪
298
00:12:55,936 --> 00:12:58,505
♪ Riding out on a horse ♪
299
00:12:58,539 --> 00:13:02,409
♪ In a star-spangled rodeo ♪
300
00:13:02,442 --> 00:13:03,811
♪ Like a rhine... ♪
301
00:13:03,844 --> 00:13:05,445
This is "Fresh Air."
302
00:13:05,479 --> 00:13:06,680
I'm Terry Gross.
303
00:13:06,713 --> 00:13:07,815
Richard Rodgers
and Oscar Hammerstein
304
00:13:07,848 --> 00:13:09,917
had one of the most successful
305
00:13:09,950 --> 00:13:12,586
musical partnerships
of the 20th century.
306
00:13:12,619 --> 00:13:15,556
But I also
think it's-it's a canard
307
00:13:15,589 --> 00:13:17,424
that Hammerstein
can't write funny songs.
308
00:13:17,457 --> 00:13:18,859
She's got a beautiful voice,
309
00:13:18,892 --> 00:13:20,527
so let's hear her singing
310
00:13:20,561 --> 00:13:21,829
"Everybody's
Got a Home but Me."
311
00:13:21,862 --> 00:13:23,664
Will you set the scene for us
312
00:13:23,697 --> 00:13:25,866
about where this song fits
into the show?
313
00:13:25,899 --> 00:13:27,568
Well, this young prostitute
314
00:13:27,601 --> 00:13:29,436
has just arrived in Monterey...
315
00:13:36,410 --> 00:13:38,812
Oh.
316
00:13:38,846 --> 00:13:40,514
- Evening.
- Hey.
317
00:13:40,547 --> 00:13:41,715
Hi. What can I get you?
318
00:13:41,748 --> 00:13:44,718
Uh, how about
a Bud and a burger?
319
00:13:44,751 --> 00:13:47,654
That sounds good.
320
00:13:47,688 --> 00:13:49,823
- Thank you so much.
- Sure thing.
321
00:13:49,857 --> 00:13:51,491
Coming up.
322
00:13:52,593 --> 00:13:53,627
Hey, Charlie.
323
00:13:57,431 --> 00:13:58,966
Tough day?
324
00:13:58,999 --> 00:14:01,468
- A long day, traveling.
- Oh, yeah?
325
00:14:01,501 --> 00:14:03,503
- Where from?
- Washington, D.C.
326
00:14:03,537 --> 00:14:05,739
Man, I ain't been there since,
like, a school trip.
327
00:14:05,772 --> 00:14:07,708
Can't even remember
how many years ago that was.
328
00:14:07,741 --> 00:14:08,775
- It was 29. 29 years.
- Yeah?
329
00:14:08,809 --> 00:14:11,511
- Was it?
- 29 years. Ms. Heuvel's history class.
330
00:14:11,545 --> 00:14:12,880
- That's what it was. Ms. Heuvel's history class.
- Yeah.
331
00:14:12,913 --> 00:14:14,681
Security guards chased us out
of the Space Museum.
332
00:14:14,715 --> 00:14:16,884
Yeah, well, we beat the dog
shit out of those other kids.
333
00:14:18,452 --> 00:14:19,686
Well, you guys aren't
missing anything.
334
00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:21,622
It is a nightmare down there.
335
00:14:21,655 --> 00:14:23,490
- Huh. Yeah.
- Well, no argument there.
336
00:14:23,523 --> 00:14:25,559
- Yeah. You can say that again.
- Mm-hmm.
337
00:14:25,592 --> 00:14:27,794
- Mike Staadt.
- Hey.
338
00:14:27,828 --> 00:14:29,830
- We call him Big Mike.
- Yeah.
339
00:14:29,863 --> 00:14:31,632
People call me Big Mike
for some reason.
340
00:14:31,665 --> 00:14:33,467
Well, it's, uh, because...
to tell us apart.
341
00:14:33,500 --> 00:14:35,602
Because I'm... my name's Mike,
too, but I'm Little Mike.
342
00:14:35,636 --> 00:14:36,904
Hey. How are you? Gary.
343
00:14:36,937 --> 00:14:38,972
- Nice to meet you.
- Gary, Gary.
344
00:14:39,006 --> 00:14:41,575
Gary from D.C.
D.C. Gary.
345
00:14:41,608 --> 00:14:43,543
He likes to give
everybody nicknames, so that's
346
00:14:43,577 --> 00:14:45,445
why he's-he's giving you
a nickname right now, which...
347
00:14:45,479 --> 00:14:47,047
It shows friendship and affection.
348
00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:49,516
- Okay, yeah, but he doesn't...
- If you don't like yours,
349
00:14:49,549 --> 00:14:50,851
- I'll take it away.
- No, I'm fine with my nickname.
350
00:14:50,884 --> 00:14:51,785
Well, I appreciate it,
Little Mike.
351
00:14:51,818 --> 00:14:53,654
Okay, thank you, D.C. Gary.
352
00:14:53,687 --> 00:14:55,055
Hey, this is our new friend,
D.C. Gary.
353
00:14:55,088 --> 00:14:56,857
- Hey. How are you?
- Hey.
354
00:14:56,890 --> 00:14:59,226
- Dave.
- My name is Gary, and I'm from D.C., so...
355
00:14:59,259 --> 00:15:00,227
- that works.
- Well, welcome to Deerlaken.
356
00:15:00,260 --> 00:15:03,230
- Thank you.
- Ever been to Wisconsin before?
357
00:15:03,263 --> 00:15:04,965
Uh, spent a fair amount of time
in Madison.
358
00:15:04,998 --> 00:15:06,667
So that's a no.
359
00:15:06,700 --> 00:15:08,035
That's not Wisconsin.
360
00:15:08,068 --> 00:15:10,704
Actually, I'm here to see
Jack Hastings. You know him?
361
00:15:10,737 --> 00:15:12,806
- Oh, yeah. He's a great guy.
- Yeah, everybody knows Jack.
362
00:15:12,839 --> 00:15:14,007
- The Colonel. Great guy.
- Semper fi.
363
00:15:14,041 --> 00:15:15,676
- Yeah.
- YouTube star.
364
00:15:15,709 --> 00:15:18,478
We've got some rooms upstairs,
if you need.
365
00:15:18,512 --> 00:15:20,647
- Sure. That sounds good.
- Tonya?
366
00:15:20,681 --> 00:15:21,815
Yeah, baby.
367
00:15:21,848 --> 00:15:23,550
This gentleman here
would like a room.
368
00:15:23,583 --> 00:15:25,752
Oh, sure.
What do you need, hon?
369
00:15:25,786 --> 00:15:28,522
Uh, anything.
Any room is fine.
370
00:15:28,555 --> 00:15:29,790
Okay.
371
00:15:29,823 --> 00:15:32,259
If you have something
on a high floor
372
00:15:32,292 --> 00:15:33,961
with a king bed
and a coffee maker...
373
00:15:33,994 --> 00:15:35,896
Okay. Yeah, we... everything's
on the second floor.
374
00:15:35,929 --> 00:15:37,631
- Perfect.
- They're all pretty much the same.
375
00:15:37,664 --> 00:15:39,700
That's perfect. I'm easy.
376
00:15:39,733 --> 00:15:41,868
- Anything's good.
- Take 206. It's the biggest.
377
00:15:41,902 --> 00:15:43,070
- They're all unlocked.
- Okay.
378
00:15:43,103 --> 00:15:45,072
Thank you so much, Tonya.
379
00:15:46,873 --> 00:15:48,742
- Hey, so, D.C. Gary.
- Yeah.
380
00:15:48,775 --> 00:15:50,277
You ever been
to the White House?
381
00:15:50,310 --> 00:15:51,945
- I have.
- What's that like?
382
00:15:51,979 --> 00:15:54,014
What's that like? It's a lot
smaller than you think.
383
00:15:54,047 --> 00:15:55,716
- Thanks.
- What? - Really? -Yeah.
384
00:15:55,749 --> 00:15:57,584
Yeah, 'cause we
didn't... I don't think we got
385
00:15:57,617 --> 00:15:58,719
by there on that student trip.
386
00:15:58,752 --> 00:16:00,520
Must not have been built
at that point.
387
00:16:00,554 --> 00:16:01,989
Oh, that looks delicious.
Thank you so much.
388
00:16:02,022 --> 00:16:03,223
Do you have a bottle opener?
389
00:16:03,256 --> 00:16:05,692
- That's a... no, that's just a twist.
- Bud, you just twist.
390
00:16:05,726 --> 00:16:07,060
- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- It's a twist-off.
391
00:16:07,094 --> 00:16:08,562
I know. I know.
392
00:16:08,595 --> 00:16:09,863
Maybe he does need
a bottle opener.
393
00:16:09,896 --> 00:16:11,598
- Maybe use your-your vest.
- He's probably...
394
00:16:11,631 --> 00:16:13,133
- Maybe a European grip.
- Ah, I got it.
395
00:16:13,166 --> 00:16:14,735
- There we go.
- There we go.
396
00:16:14,768 --> 00:16:15,836
Cheers.
397
00:16:15,869 --> 00:16:17,304
- Hey.
- Cheers. - Cheers.
398
00:16:17,337 --> 00:16:18,972
- Cheers.
- Here's to you. - Cheers.
399
00:16:19,006 --> 00:16:20,874
Budweiser.
400
00:16:20,907 --> 00:16:23,910
Mmm. Mmm.
401
00:16:23,944 --> 00:16:26,013
Mm-hmm.
402
00:16:28,982 --> 00:16:31,585
You got to be kidding me.
403
00:16:37,624 --> 00:16:39,626
Okay.
404
00:16:41,695 --> 00:16:43,130
All right.
405
00:16:43,163 --> 00:16:44,831
All right.
406
00:16:44,865 --> 00:16:46,666
It's fine, it's fine.
407
00:16:46,700 --> 00:16:48,635
It's fine!
408
00:16:48,668 --> 00:16:50,137
All right.
409
00:16:50,170 --> 00:16:53,040
And it's fucking locked.
410
00:16:53,073 --> 00:16:54,674
Goddamn it.
411
00:16:54,708 --> 00:16:56,810
Oh, shit.
412
00:16:56,843 --> 00:16:59,880
Ah, fuck this.
413
00:16:59,913 --> 00:17:02,783
Oh, Deerlaken.
414
00:17:02,816 --> 00:17:04,684
Love it.
415
00:17:12,993 --> 00:17:15,629
Okay.
416
00:17:15,662 --> 00:17:17,764
Everything all right?
417
00:17:17,798 --> 00:17:20,067
Uh, hel... Yes? Hello?
418
00:17:20,100 --> 00:17:21,835
- It's Dave.
- Yes?
419
00:17:21,868 --> 00:17:23,103
From the Hofbrau House.
420
00:17:23,136 --> 00:17:25,672
- From downstairs?
- Yes.
421
00:17:25,705 --> 00:17:27,607
- O-Okay.
- Everything all right?
422
00:17:27,641 --> 00:17:31,044
Mm... yeah, I was just looking
for a Wi-Fi password.
423
00:17:31,078 --> 00:17:32,813
Good luck.
424
00:17:32,846 --> 00:17:34,614
Case-sensitive?
425
00:17:34,648 --> 00:17:36,783
No, good luck getting Wi-Fi.
426
00:17:36,817 --> 00:17:38,718
You're better off
using your phone.
427
00:17:38,752 --> 00:17:40,754
- Okay.
- Okay.
428
00:17:40,787 --> 00:17:42,022
All right, very good.
429
00:17:42,055 --> 00:17:44,191
- Thank you.
- Sure.
430
00:17:44,224 --> 00:17:46,993
- Goodbye.
- Night, Gar.
431
00:18:06,447 --> 00:18:07,914
Everything all right?
432
00:18:23,730 --> 00:18:25,232
Hey, D.C. Gary!
433
00:18:26,900 --> 00:18:29,136
Hey, Gary.
434
00:18:29,169 --> 00:18:30,704
Hey.
435
00:18:31,738 --> 00:18:32,973
Good morning, Gary.
436
00:18:33,006 --> 00:18:34,908
Hey.
437
00:18:34,941 --> 00:18:36,910
Okay.
438
00:18:39,980 --> 00:18:42,048
- Excuse me, Gary.
- Hi, Gary.
439
00:18:42,082 --> 00:18:44,718
All right.
440
00:18:47,220 --> 00:18:49,022
Well, hello, Gary.
441
00:18:50,491 --> 00:18:52,192
The Mikes told me
that you're up from D.C.,
442
00:18:52,225 --> 00:18:54,060
and I figured that
you might be on the hunt
443
00:18:54,094 --> 00:18:55,829
for some good caffeine.
444
00:18:55,862 --> 00:18:58,165
Yes. Um... sure.
445
00:18:58,198 --> 00:18:59,766
May I have a...
446
00:18:59,799 --> 00:19:01,902
- Coffee?
- A coffee.
447
00:19:01,935 --> 00:19:03,036
Cream, two sugars.
448
00:19:03,069 --> 00:19:05,272
Not how I like it, but good.
449
00:19:05,305 --> 00:19:06,373
And i-if you don't mind, um,
450
00:19:06,407 --> 00:19:08,775
when you head up to Jack's,
can you give him this?
451
00:19:08,808 --> 00:19:10,076
Jack, uh, he gets
a little cranky
452
00:19:10,110 --> 00:19:11,479
if he doesn't get his linzers.
453
00:19:11,512 --> 00:19:13,813
Oh, and I-I, uh...
454
00:19:13,847 --> 00:19:16,484
I put a little streusel
in there for you, too.
455
00:19:16,517 --> 00:19:18,752
Just made it. Still warm.
456
00:19:20,320 --> 00:19:22,189
Mmm. Okay.
457
00:19:22,222 --> 00:19:24,191
Ah, no, no, no, no, no.
458
00:19:24,224 --> 00:19:25,926
You're saving me a trip, so...
459
00:19:27,928 --> 00:19:29,930
Okay.
460
00:19:29,963 --> 00:19:31,998
Um, okay.
461
00:19:32,032 --> 00:19:33,733
Okay.
462
00:19:35,235 --> 00:19:37,037
Bye, Gary.
463
00:19:37,070 --> 00:19:39,072
Okay. Bye.
464
00:19:39,105 --> 00:19:40,840
Have a good one.
465
00:19:40,874 --> 00:19:43,777
Thank you. You have a good one.
466
00:19:43,810 --> 00:19:46,012
Hey, guys.
Have a good one.
467
00:19:46,046 --> 00:19:48,882
Hey, lady. Have a good one.
468
00:19:48,915 --> 00:19:51,351
All right.
Is everybody having a good one?
469
00:19:51,384 --> 00:19:53,954
What the fuck?
470
00:20:04,864 --> 00:20:06,833
Oh, my God.
471
00:20:06,866 --> 00:20:08,835
Oh, fuck!
472
00:20:17,578 --> 00:20:19,045
Oh!
473
00:20:19,079 --> 00:20:20,347
Fuck me!
474
00:20:20,380 --> 00:20:22,115
Oh, God.
475
00:20:27,153 --> 00:20:29,222
Mmm, mmm.
476
00:20:29,256 --> 00:20:30,824
Mmm.
477
00:20:42,403 --> 00:20:44,070
Mmm.
478
00:21:00,020 --> 00:21:03,156
Shit! God! God!
479
00:21:07,193 --> 00:21:10,063
Sunny! Muffin! Stand down!
480
00:21:10,096 --> 00:21:12,299
Oh, hey.
481
00:21:12,332 --> 00:21:15,235
You Ann's new delivery guy?
482
00:21:15,268 --> 00:21:17,003
I'm sorry.
483
00:21:17,037 --> 00:21:19,039
Uh, I'll go back and get you
some more of those.
484
00:21:19,072 --> 00:21:20,907
Oh, it's fine.
I'll probably end up
485
00:21:20,940 --> 00:21:22,876
giving them
most of them anyway.
486
00:21:25,045 --> 00:21:27,180
Um... okay.
487
00:21:27,213 --> 00:21:28,381
Okay.
488
00:21:28,416 --> 00:21:30,817
That's an angry labradoodle.
489
00:21:31,652 --> 00:21:34,988
Oh, really beautiful out here.
490
00:21:35,021 --> 00:21:37,090
Really takes me back.
491
00:21:37,123 --> 00:21:39,025
Oh, you a farm boy?
492
00:21:39,059 --> 00:21:41,027
Uh, uh, no.
493
00:21:41,061 --> 00:21:43,196
Political consultant.
494
00:21:44,665 --> 00:21:47,133
Well, sir, I saw your video
on the Internet...
495
00:21:47,167 --> 00:21:48,902
the town hall you busted up.
496
00:21:48,935 --> 00:21:50,937
Um...
497
00:21:50,970 --> 00:21:52,339
your comments
on the responsibility
498
00:21:52,372 --> 00:21:54,408
to the least of us
moved me deeply.
499
00:21:54,442 --> 00:21:57,077
- Grab a bucket.
- And I'll grab a bucket.
500
00:21:57,110 --> 00:21:59,079
And here they come. Okay.
501
00:21:59,112 --> 00:22:00,947
I think, increasingly...
502
00:22:00,980 --> 00:22:04,084
...we have lost the capacity
to see each other.
503
00:22:04,117 --> 00:22:07,987
Empathy for those
that we don't resemble.
504
00:22:08,021 --> 00:22:09,423
Not to say partisanship
has no place,
505
00:22:09,457 --> 00:22:12,225
but certainly not at the level
of toxicity
506
00:22:12,258 --> 00:22:14,462
that our current debate
incorporates.
507
00:22:16,296 --> 00:22:19,966
"No man left behind"
is your ethos as a Marine!
508
00:22:19,999 --> 00:22:23,069
I think it's especially
poignant this day and age!
509
00:22:23,103 --> 00:22:25,439
Your words spoke to values,
not identity.
510
00:22:25,473 --> 00:22:27,307
So important.
511
00:22:47,260 --> 00:22:49,095
It was Abraham Lincoln
who said,
512
00:22:49,129 --> 00:22:51,030
"An appeal to
our better angels."
513
00:22:59,339 --> 00:23:01,274
You came out of there
pretty fast.
514
00:23:01,307 --> 00:23:03,076
Did you wash?
515
00:23:18,024 --> 00:23:19,225
Okay.
516
00:23:19,259 --> 00:23:21,729
Here it is.
517
00:23:21,762 --> 00:23:24,364
I want you to be
the Democratic candidate
518
00:23:24,397 --> 00:23:26,366
for mayor of Deerlaken.
519
00:23:28,268 --> 00:23:30,538
Now, I know you probably don't
think that you're a Democrat,
520
00:23:30,571 --> 00:23:33,507
but after watching your speech,
I can assure you that you are,
521
00:23:33,541 --> 00:23:36,176
and I would like to offer
my company's services
522
00:23:36,209 --> 00:23:37,944
to help you do so.
523
00:23:45,018 --> 00:23:47,555
Well, I thank you.
524
00:23:47,588 --> 00:23:49,255
You're welcome.
525
00:23:49,289 --> 00:23:51,224
You know,
thanks for the help today.
526
00:23:51,257 --> 00:23:53,026
My pleasure.
527
00:23:53,059 --> 00:23:56,329
But all things being equal,
528
00:23:56,362 --> 00:23:58,364
I'd rather not.
529
00:24:01,602 --> 00:24:04,170
All right.
530
00:24:04,204 --> 00:24:07,006
Can I be completely honest
with you?
531
00:24:07,040 --> 00:24:08,274
No bullshit.
532
00:24:08,308 --> 00:24:09,510
Be nice.
533
00:24:09,543 --> 00:24:11,311
My daughter's here.
534
00:24:11,344 --> 00:24:14,482
That was your daughter,
with her-her arm up the c-cow?
535
00:24:14,515 --> 00:24:16,349
Okay. Look...
536
00:24:18,051 --> 00:24:21,087
- Democrats are getting their asses kicked.
- Mm.
537
00:24:21,120 --> 00:24:25,459
Because guys like me don't know
how to talk to guys like you.
538
00:24:25,493 --> 00:24:28,361
I really believe that
you believe what I believe...
539
00:24:28,394 --> 00:24:31,432
that what is happening
in this town is wrong.
540
00:24:31,465 --> 00:24:34,200
What is happening
in this country is wrong.
541
00:24:34,234 --> 00:24:36,169
People are turning their backs
on each other.
542
00:24:36,202 --> 00:24:38,304
We are forgetting
that we need each other.
543
00:24:38,338 --> 00:24:40,240
What you said in your speech...
544
00:24:40,273 --> 00:24:42,041
strong as our weakest link.
545
00:24:42,075 --> 00:24:43,343
Do you mean that?
546
00:24:43,376 --> 00:24:45,178
Did you mean it
when you said that?
547
00:24:45,211 --> 00:24:48,348
Because if you did, I think
that you have an obligation
548
00:24:48,381 --> 00:24:50,518
to try to strengthen
those weak links.
549
00:24:50,551 --> 00:24:53,521
And you can do it.
You can do it.
550
00:24:53,554 --> 00:24:55,656
You can do it
in this sort of position.
551
00:24:55,689 --> 00:24:59,426
You can help strengthen
those... those weak links.
552
00:25:01,662 --> 00:25:04,030
You can achieve that.
553
00:25:07,233 --> 00:25:09,403
Okay...
554
00:25:09,436 --> 00:25:10,671
All right.
555
00:25:10,704 --> 00:25:12,372
You know what?
556
00:25:15,341 --> 00:25:18,846
All due respect, Colonel,
anybody can make a speech.
557
00:25:18,879 --> 00:25:20,848
The real test is
backing up your words.
558
00:25:20,881 --> 00:25:23,283
The things that you said
to those folks in that meeting,
559
00:25:23,316 --> 00:25:26,453
was that principle,
560
00:25:26,487 --> 00:25:28,489
or was that just a hobby?
561
00:25:30,491 --> 00:25:32,225
Let me know.
562
00:25:32,258 --> 00:25:35,128
Why does he need three guns?
563
00:26:01,522 --> 00:26:03,457
Oh, God.
564
00:26:03,490 --> 00:26:06,460
- Shit.
- I'm sorry if I startled you, sunshine.
565
00:26:07,761 --> 00:26:09,663
Don't you people
believe in locks?
566
00:26:09,697 --> 00:26:13,434
Or privacy
or basic social contracts?
567
00:26:13,467 --> 00:26:15,301
Yeah, Tonya let me in.
568
00:26:15,335 --> 00:26:17,504
I told her I had
something important
569
00:26:17,538 --> 00:26:20,206
I needed to talk to you about.
570
00:26:22,208 --> 00:26:23,611
You'll do it?
571
00:26:23,644 --> 00:26:25,345
Under one condition.
572
00:26:25,378 --> 00:26:27,113
Great. Name it.
573
00:26:28,949 --> 00:26:30,751
You run the damn thing.
574
00:26:30,784 --> 00:26:32,453
I got the farm to worry about.
575
00:26:32,486 --> 00:26:34,320
Don't have any idea
how to even start.
576
00:26:34,354 --> 00:26:37,223
I will have one of my top guys
make himself available to you.
577
00:26:37,256 --> 00:26:38,559
No, no, that's not gonna do it.
578
00:26:38,592 --> 00:26:40,928
You.
579
00:26:40,961 --> 00:26:44,263
The deal is you run it
from here.
580
00:26:44,297 --> 00:26:46,165
I checked you out.
581
00:26:46,199 --> 00:26:48,402
You got one hell
of a portfolio.
582
00:26:50,537 --> 00:26:53,407
So, deal?
583
00:26:58,277 --> 00:27:00,246
I'd like
a big clump of the cows
584
00:27:00,279 --> 00:27:02,281
right here in the center.
585
00:27:03,651 --> 00:27:05,619
- Do you copy me?
- Yes, sir!
586
00:27:05,653 --> 00:27:08,455
Okay. If you can just
move 'em over that way.
587
00:27:08,489 --> 00:27:10,289
- Yep!
- Okay!
588
00:27:10,323 --> 00:27:12,593
And if you could get
some of them to face front.
589
00:27:12,626 --> 00:27:14,260
Oh, my God.
590
00:27:14,293 --> 00:27:16,463
Hey there, Colonel.
591
00:27:16,497 --> 00:27:18,398
Gary.
592
00:27:18,432 --> 00:27:21,502
Bobby, thanks a million
for coming out here.
593
00:27:21,535 --> 00:27:22,803
I'll be certain to vote
for you.
594
00:27:22,836 --> 00:27:24,672
Thank y'all, folks, for coming.
595
00:27:24,705 --> 00:27:26,674
So, this is just
a quick kickoff.
596
00:27:26,707 --> 00:27:29,543
Let's make you look
a little more like Farmer Jack
597
00:27:29,576 --> 00:27:33,614
and less like Certified
Public Accountant Jack.
598
00:27:33,647 --> 00:27:35,783
- There you go.
- Uh, okay.
599
00:27:35,816 --> 00:27:37,418
Oh...
600
00:27:37,451 --> 00:27:38,519
- Oh, no, no. That's okay.
- Quit it.
601
00:27:38,552 --> 00:27:39,553
- That's okay. Donny, right?
- Quit it.
602
00:27:39,586 --> 00:27:40,721
Michael.
603
00:27:40,754 --> 00:27:43,424
Michael, we can just
boom him, okay?
604
00:27:43,457 --> 00:27:44,692
The pole with the thing
on the end.
605
00:27:44,725 --> 00:27:45,993
Do you do sound, Michael?
606
00:27:46,026 --> 00:27:47,494
- Chuck does sound.
- Okay.
607
00:27:47,528 --> 00:27:48,996
But he's at the lake
with his family.
608
00:27:49,029 --> 00:27:50,229
Okay, well, that's too bad
that he's not...
609
00:27:50,263 --> 00:27:52,265
- Eh, that's okay. That's okay. We'll just go without.
- No.
610
00:27:52,298 --> 00:27:53,834
- Thank you, Donny.
- Thank you, son. Thank you.
611
00:27:53,867 --> 00:27:55,368
Okay.
612
00:27:55,402 --> 00:27:56,570
Let's give it a try.
613
00:27:56,603 --> 00:27:57,838
There you are.
614
00:27:57,871 --> 00:27:59,707
Uh, this is...
615
00:27:59,740 --> 00:28:01,542
Why you are running for mayor.
616
00:28:02,576 --> 00:28:03,677
Wow.
617
00:28:03,711 --> 00:28:05,713
I quote Patton...
618
00:28:05,746 --> 00:28:07,280
and Jesus.
619
00:28:07,313 --> 00:28:08,582
Paraphrase.
620
00:28:08,615 --> 00:28:10,684
And you can't go to the prom
without a corsage.
621
00:28:12,686 --> 00:28:14,621
Let's make magic.
622
00:28:14,655 --> 00:28:17,458
All right.
Thank you for coming.
623
00:28:17,491 --> 00:28:19,460
Could we quiet the cows,
please?!
624
00:28:19,493 --> 00:28:21,360
Thank you!
625
00:28:21,394 --> 00:28:24,330
Ladies and gentlemen,
Colonel Jack Hastings.
626
00:28:28,502 --> 00:28:30,404
So, uh,
627
00:28:30,437 --> 00:28:33,741
I am Colonel Jack Hastings,
and...
628
00:28:33,774 --> 00:28:36,643
I'm running for mayor.
629
00:28:40,914 --> 00:28:43,550
So, uh...
630
00:28:43,584 --> 00:28:46,420
How we doing?
631
00:28:46,453 --> 00:28:48,789
All right.
Beautifully put.
632
00:28:50,323 --> 00:28:51,792
Are there any questions
for the Colonel?
633
00:28:51,825 --> 00:28:53,460
Anyone?
634
00:28:55,095 --> 00:28:56,864
Bueller?
635
00:28:56,897 --> 00:28:58,665
Uh, yes, Colonel.
636
00:28:58,699 --> 00:29:00,434
Yes, name and affiliation,
please.
637
00:29:00,467 --> 00:29:02,803
- It's Dan.
- Name and affiliation, please.
638
00:29:02,836 --> 00:29:04,705
I'm Dan.
639
00:29:04,738 --> 00:29:06,406
Go ahead, Daniel.
640
00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:07,674
Easy on the cows!
641
00:29:07,708 --> 00:29:09,810
Um, yes, Mr. Hastings,
uh, Colonel,
642
00:29:09,843 --> 00:29:11,411
could you say that again?
643
00:29:11,445 --> 00:29:13,580
Because I-I don't think
my recorder was on.
644
00:29:15,516 --> 00:29:17,383
Mm. Do it again?
645
00:29:17,417 --> 00:29:18,752
Hey, you know what?
646
00:29:18,786 --> 00:29:19,920
It's okay.
647
00:29:19,953 --> 00:29:21,387
- Now...
- We'll get it.
648
00:29:21,421 --> 00:29:23,490
Okay, this one...
649
00:29:23,524 --> 00:29:25,626
What I'm looking for...
650
00:29:25,659 --> 00:29:28,529
don't put all the black ones
in the center.
651
00:29:28,562 --> 00:29:31,431
He's running as a moderate,
okay?
652
00:29:31,465 --> 00:29:33,600
And if you could get some
facing this way,
653
00:29:33,634 --> 00:29:35,102
that would be helpful.
654
00:29:35,135 --> 00:29:36,904
More local news tonight
out of Deerlaken.
655
00:29:36,937 --> 00:29:38,572
Former Marine Colonel
Jack Hastings
656
00:29:38,605 --> 00:29:40,707
announcing today
that he's running for mayor
657
00:29:40,741 --> 00:29:42,409
as a Democrat.
658
00:29:42,442 --> 00:29:44,411
While Braun may have
an incumbent's advantage,
659
00:29:44,444 --> 00:29:45,646
political insiders say Hastings
660
00:29:45,679 --> 00:29:47,681
is likely to give him
a run for his money.
661
00:29:47,714 --> 00:29:49,116
Happening now, a major...
662
00:29:49,149 --> 00:29:51,785
Well, how much
is this gonna cost?
663
00:29:51,819 --> 00:29:54,121
You let me worry about that.
664
00:29:54,154 --> 00:29:56,389
What I need from you
are people, volunteers.
665
00:29:56,423 --> 00:29:57,691
We got a lot of legwork
666
00:29:57,724 --> 00:29:59,860
if we're gonna make a noise
in this thing.
667
00:29:59,893 --> 00:30:01,695
- More coffee?
- Oh, I'm good.
668
00:30:01,728 --> 00:30:03,497
No, I'm good, Lizzie.
Thanks.
669
00:30:03,530 --> 00:30:04,932
You know what I do need?
670
00:30:04,965 --> 00:30:07,801
I need a couple buckets
of that gravy
671
00:30:07,835 --> 00:30:10,404
so I can take a bath in it.
672
00:30:11,471 --> 00:30:13,574
So good.
673
00:30:13,607 --> 00:30:14,641
Delicious.
674
00:30:16,009 --> 00:30:18,512
My compliments to the chef.
675
00:30:18,545 --> 00:30:19,580
I'll let Ziggy know.
676
00:30:19,613 --> 00:30:20,714
Great.
677
00:30:20,747 --> 00:30:21,915
That ought to cheer him up.
678
00:30:21,949 --> 00:30:24,551
Just the check, Lizzie.
679
00:30:24,585 --> 00:30:26,520
Will do, Jack.
680
00:30:26,553 --> 00:30:29,456
What's the deal
with the happy chef?
681
00:30:29,489 --> 00:30:31,425
Oh, Ziggy's all right.
682
00:30:31,458 --> 00:30:33,427
- Oh?
- He owns the place.
683
00:30:33,460 --> 00:30:35,762
Eh, he may be a bit peeved
about the election thing.
684
00:30:35,796 --> 00:30:38,599
He's Mayor Braun's brother.
685
00:30:38,632 --> 00:30:41,668
Why isn't this place
called Braun's?
686
00:30:41,702 --> 00:30:46,740
The Hansens owned this place
since probably... Korea.
687
00:30:46,773 --> 00:30:49,610
Bobby Hansen started it,
his kids ran it for years,
688
00:30:49,643 --> 00:30:52,646
and had to sell
once the base closed,
689
00:30:52,679 --> 00:30:56,617
but no matter who owns it,
it'll always be Hansen's.
690
00:30:56,650 --> 00:30:59,553
Base closing
really hammered this place.
691
00:30:59,586 --> 00:31:01,421
Yeah, it did.
692
00:31:01,455 --> 00:31:04,424
More than half of
our storefronts have shut down.
693
00:31:04,458 --> 00:31:05,926
In fact, we're losing
our high school
694
00:31:05,959 --> 00:31:08,195
if we can't come up
with the funding.
695
00:31:08,228 --> 00:31:12,699
But no matter what folks
might wish for here,
696
00:31:12,733 --> 00:31:14,601
it ain't coming back.
697
00:31:14,635 --> 00:31:16,703
"Vote for Jack Hastings,
698
00:31:16,737 --> 00:31:18,505
"'cause no matter
what you wish for,
699
00:31:18,538 --> 00:31:20,841
it ain't never coming back."
700
00:31:20,874 --> 00:31:22,609
- I like it. It's good.
- Well...
701
00:31:22,643 --> 00:31:24,845
- I'm not gonna lie to people.
- No, I know. I know.
702
00:31:24,878 --> 00:31:27,781
I was just being witty
and cynical.
703
00:31:27,814 --> 00:31:30,484
Can't win a battle
if you're not honest
704
00:31:30,517 --> 00:31:32,786
about what you're
really up against.
705
00:31:32,819 --> 00:31:34,488
No, you cannot.
706
00:31:35,923 --> 00:31:38,225
Not enough for a bath,
707
00:31:38,258 --> 00:31:40,560
but you can get
a good foot soak in.
708
00:31:42,062 --> 00:31:43,230
Thank you.
709
00:31:43,263 --> 00:31:45,933
A straw.
710
00:31:47,935 --> 00:31:49,536
All right, let's bring it in.
711
00:31:49,569 --> 00:31:51,004
Everybody in. Ah...
712
00:31:51,038 --> 00:31:52,940
- phone bank!
- Phone bank.
713
00:31:52,973 --> 00:31:54,641
Well, you'll get it next time.
714
00:31:54,675 --> 00:31:56,476
Okay, I want you to be upbeat.
715
00:31:56,510 --> 00:31:57,911
I want you to be positive.
716
00:31:57,945 --> 00:32:00,547
Active participation
is what we're looking for.
717
00:32:00,580 --> 00:32:02,516
Would they volunteer?
Would they donate?
718
00:32:02,549 --> 00:32:04,084
Can we drop off a lawn sign?
719
00:32:04,117 --> 00:32:06,019
Would they donate?
720
00:32:06,053 --> 00:32:07,854
Would they donate?
721
00:32:07,888 --> 00:32:10,524
Yes, write that down.
That's good.
722
00:32:10,557 --> 00:32:12,626
Got some sample scripts
for you there.
723
00:32:12,659 --> 00:32:14,494
Contact list there.
724
00:32:14,528 --> 00:32:15,862
To the ramparts!
725
00:32:17,731 --> 00:32:19,566
That means go. You can begin.
726
00:32:19,599 --> 00:32:21,001
- Oh.
- Now...
727
00:32:21,034 --> 00:32:22,936
you guys are my "A" team.
728
00:32:22,970 --> 00:32:25,572
So, first, we're going to take
these lawn signs,
729
00:32:25,605 --> 00:32:28,542
and we're going to put them
in all available public spaces.
730
00:32:28,575 --> 00:32:30,577
I want them visible
but not obnoxiously so.
731
00:32:30,610 --> 00:32:33,714
Isn't it a little early
for lawn signs?
732
00:32:35,582 --> 00:32:37,551
I'm sorry. She just, um...
733
00:32:37,584 --> 00:32:38,719
'Cause just around here,
734
00:32:38,752 --> 00:32:40,587
sometimes people
aren't so keen...
735
00:32:40,620 --> 00:32:42,789
- Mm-hmm.
- But then, I do appreciate
736
00:32:42,823 --> 00:32:44,624
that you got the signs made.
737
00:32:44,658 --> 00:32:46,560
- Mm-hmm.
- I mean, we've always used lawn signs.
738
00:32:46,593 --> 00:32:48,695
- Yeah.
- They've worked for hundreds of years, so...
739
00:32:48,729 --> 00:32:50,297
- Great.
- Yeah, let's just use 'em.
740
00:32:50,330 --> 00:32:52,532
Great. All right, Ann?
741
00:32:52,566 --> 00:32:54,534
- Hmm? Okay.
- I want you to take the downtown area.
742
00:32:54,568 --> 00:32:56,837
Martha, Dave, how about
everything west of 39?
743
00:32:56,870 --> 00:32:58,872
And, Diana, I'd like you to stay here...
744
00:32:58,905 --> 00:33:00,607
- Hello?
- Yeah?
745
00:33:00,640 --> 00:33:01,975
- ...to do...
- Good morning.
746
00:33:02,009 --> 00:33:03,744
Hi. This is Matthew,
and I'm a volunteer
747
00:33:03,777 --> 00:33:04,945
- calling with Jack...
- Matthew?
748
00:33:04,978 --> 00:33:06,046
- Matt... Matthew...
- Hello?
749
00:33:06,079 --> 00:33:07,881
Hello?
750
00:33:07,914 --> 00:33:09,616
What are you doing?
751
00:33:09,649 --> 00:33:11,685
- Zimmer.
- Good morning, Mr. Zimmer.
752
00:33:11,718 --> 00:33:14,121
My name is Michael, calling
on behalf of Colonel Hastings.
753
00:33:14,154 --> 00:33:16,623
Guys, guys, guys, guys.
754
00:33:16,656 --> 00:33:17,958
All right, this is
what's happening here.
755
00:33:17,991 --> 00:33:20,160
You're calling off
the office contact list.
756
00:33:20,193 --> 00:33:21,862
This is the voter contact list.
757
00:33:21,895 --> 00:33:23,864
- Oh.
- So, yeah, I know.
758
00:33:23,897 --> 00:33:26,733
I want you to call
the voter contact list.
759
00:33:26,767 --> 00:33:28,135
We're already voting
for the Colonel.
760
00:33:28,168 --> 00:33:29,836
Okay? Good.
761
00:33:29,870 --> 00:33:31,638
Let's go do the signs, too.
762
00:33:31,671 --> 00:33:32,973
Oh, my God.
763
00:33:33,006 --> 00:33:35,175
Keep doing that, guys.
764
00:33:43,016 --> 00:33:45,652
Gar! Hey, D.C. Gary!
765
00:33:45,685 --> 00:33:48,688
- Hi.
- Hey, Gar, come on over.
766
00:33:48,722 --> 00:33:50,824
Okay. All right.
767
00:33:50,857 --> 00:33:52,659
Nothing, nothing, nothing.
768
00:33:52,692 --> 00:33:54,061
Uh, that's a six.
That is a five.
769
00:33:54,094 --> 00:33:55,595
And a four. Look at that.
770
00:33:55,629 --> 00:33:56,797
- And a seven.
- Oh, my... Oh!
771
00:33:56,830 --> 00:33:58,665
I'm keeping it, baby!
772
00:33:58,698 --> 00:34:00,700
- Ah!
- Hey, everybody.
773
00:34:00,734 --> 00:34:02,135
- Hey.
- This is D.C. Gary.
774
00:34:02,169 --> 00:34:04,671
He's staying above the Hofbrau.
775
00:34:04,704 --> 00:34:05,872
- Hey.
- Good to see you.
776
00:34:05,906 --> 00:34:06,840
Welcome to
The Ambassador's Lounge.
777
00:34:06,873 --> 00:34:08,108
Thank you very much.
778
00:34:08,141 --> 00:34:09,709
Hear you're in town
helping the Colonel.
779
00:34:09,743 --> 00:34:11,111
- Yes, I am.
- He's a good man.
780
00:34:11,144 --> 00:34:12,913
He is. He is a good man.
781
00:34:12,946 --> 00:34:15,649
So, is this your
campaign office here?
782
00:34:15,682 --> 00:34:17,684
This?
783
00:34:17,717 --> 00:34:19,786
No, this is
The Ambassador's Lounge,
784
00:34:19,820 --> 00:34:23,223
an elite, uh, social club of
the area's top entrepreneurs,
785
00:34:23,256 --> 00:34:25,892
- athletes and raconteurs.
- Ah.
786
00:34:25,926 --> 00:34:27,661
It's a shithole.
787
00:34:27,694 --> 00:34:28,795
Hey, guys.
788
00:34:28,829 --> 00:34:30,964
Jack's already got lawn signs
printed up.
789
00:34:35,001 --> 00:34:37,237
Well, I got to head out.
790
00:34:37,270 --> 00:34:39,172
Got a lot of work
to catch up on.
791
00:34:39,206 --> 00:34:40,807
Pleasure meeting everybody.
792
00:34:40,841 --> 00:34:42,709
Hey, Father,
you want to go with him?
793
00:34:42,742 --> 00:34:43,977
He might need a miracle or two.
794
00:34:44,010 --> 00:34:45,879
This town hasn't had
a Democrat mayor
795
00:34:45,912 --> 00:34:48,081
since La Follette
ruled these parts, and...
796
00:34:48,115 --> 00:34:50,851
hasn't had a Democratic Party
since the '70s.
797
00:34:50,884 --> 00:34:52,119
Gonna take a little bit more
798
00:34:52,152 --> 00:34:54,020
than lawn signs.
799
00:34:55,122 --> 00:34:56,823
Okay.
800
00:35:04,698 --> 00:35:06,766
Colonel Jack Hastings.
801
00:35:06,800 --> 00:35:08,235
Tempered by war.
802
00:35:08,268 --> 00:35:11,238
Chain's only as strong
as its weakest link.
803
00:35:11,271 --> 00:35:13,740
Driven by faith.
804
00:35:13,773 --> 00:35:15,809
I am my brother's keeper.
805
00:35:15,842 --> 00:35:17,978
A new kind of Democrat.
806
00:35:18,011 --> 00:35:20,780
A Democrat for the heartland.
807
00:35:20,814 --> 00:35:24,184
Jack Hastings,
a redder kind of blue.
808
00:35:24,217 --> 00:35:26,753
Paid for
by Real Americans for...
809
00:35:26,786 --> 00:35:29,156
What are you up to, Zimmer?
810
00:35:29,189 --> 00:35:32,259
I am telling you guys,
Jack could be the real deal,
811
00:35:32,292 --> 00:35:33,894
on a national level.
812
00:35:33,927 --> 00:35:35,128
On a national level?
813
00:35:35,162 --> 00:35:38,098
It's like he's a cross
between...
814
00:35:38,131 --> 00:35:41,134
- MacArthur and elk jerky.
- Wait, what?
815
00:35:41,168 --> 00:35:43,737
And one of those machines
that test grip strength.
816
00:35:43,770 --> 00:35:45,473
Sounds too good to be true.
817
00:35:45,506 --> 00:35:47,207
Oh, my God.
818
00:35:47,240 --> 00:35:49,809
Semicolon.
819
00:35:49,843 --> 00:35:51,912
She took the bait.
820
00:35:51,945 --> 00:35:54,681
It's on here, boys.
Game on.
821
00:35:57,284 --> 00:35:59,085
- And let him be the star, you know?
- Yeah.
822
00:35:59,119 --> 00:36:00,787
- Yep.
- So...
823
00:36:00,820 --> 00:36:03,290
♪ A little bit
of Hastings all the time ♪
824
00:36:03,323 --> 00:36:06,059
♪ We're gonna win election,
yeah, yeah, yeah. ♪
825
00:36:06,092 --> 00:36:08,496
Oh, yeah. Oh, here I am.
826
00:36:08,529 --> 00:36:10,498
Yes. Hello, party people.
827
00:36:10,531 --> 00:36:13,333
Oh, 'tis a beautiful day
to be alive
828
00:36:13,366 --> 00:36:15,068
and on the vanguard of change.
829
00:36:15,101 --> 00:36:17,103
Who wants something to eat?
830
00:36:17,137 --> 00:36:18,738
They're so delicious.
831
00:36:21,341 --> 00:36:23,310
Okay.
832
00:36:23,343 --> 00:36:24,911
What's going on?
833
00:36:24,945 --> 00:36:26,880
Why all the long faces?
834
00:36:26,913 --> 00:36:28,081
Did you not see it?
835
00:36:28,114 --> 00:36:30,518
The billboard.
836
00:36:30,551 --> 00:36:34,020
The one on Main with the giant
"Vote for Mayor Braun"?
837
00:36:34,054 --> 00:36:35,322
- Yes.
- What about it?
838
00:36:35,355 --> 00:36:37,090
"What about it?"
839
00:36:37,123 --> 00:36:39,059
That's the
Macgregor Ford billboard.
840
00:36:39,092 --> 00:36:40,760
Okay.
841
00:36:40,794 --> 00:36:42,095
Okay, so it's been
the Macgregor Ford billboard
842
00:36:42,128 --> 00:36:43,230
for probably 40 years.
843
00:36:43,263 --> 00:36:44,465
God only knows
how much it cost.
844
00:36:44,498 --> 00:36:47,267
And it looks like Braun has
taken over Jerry's old office
845
00:36:47,300 --> 00:36:48,969
as some sort of
campaign headquarters.
846
00:36:49,002 --> 00:36:51,104
Wait a second. Wait a second.
Hold on. Hold on.
847
00:36:51,137 --> 00:36:53,541
Um, are you telling me
that the mayor,
848
00:36:53,574 --> 00:36:55,775
who's running for reelection,
849
00:36:55,809 --> 00:36:59,779
has decided to advertise
his campaign for mayor?
850
00:36:59,813 --> 00:37:03,116
And he's doing it from a...
campaign office?
851
00:37:03,149 --> 00:37:05,385
Oh, my God!
Oh, I... This is...
852
00:37:05,419 --> 00:37:07,387
This is overwhelming to me.
853
00:37:07,421 --> 00:37:08,955
Oh, my God.
854
00:37:08,989 --> 00:37:10,257
I don't... I...
855
00:37:10,290 --> 00:37:11,258
What...
856
00:37:11,291 --> 00:37:13,026
I have the vapors. I...
857
00:37:13,059 --> 00:37:14,194
I'm hyperventilating.
858
00:37:14,227 --> 00:37:16,229
Why are these spoons
just standing there?
859
00:37:16,263 --> 00:37:17,897
You don't get it.
860
00:37:19,132 --> 00:37:20,934
Sorry. Sorry. Sorry.
861
00:37:20,967 --> 00:37:22,570
You don't get it.
862
00:37:22,603 --> 00:37:24,804
Do you have any idea
how much that costs?
863
00:37:24,838 --> 00:37:26,373
Well, that space
is 3,800 square feet,
864
00:37:26,407 --> 00:37:29,075
and it runs for
$20 a square foot yearly.
865
00:37:29,109 --> 00:37:32,245
Prorated to two months
is $7,600.
866
00:37:32,279 --> 00:37:35,282
The billboard, a little bit
harder to decipher.
867
00:37:35,315 --> 00:37:37,384
But I'd say,
based on the location
868
00:37:37,418 --> 00:37:40,887
and Mayor Braun's desperation,
8K all-in.
869
00:37:40,920 --> 00:37:42,289
Design and printing included.
870
00:37:42,322 --> 00:37:44,924
I don't know,
maybe something like that.
871
00:37:44,958 --> 00:37:47,294
Well, there's no way that
Braun's got that much money.
872
00:37:47,327 --> 00:37:50,297
Unless... this little
campaign of ours
873
00:37:50,330 --> 00:37:53,900
has caught the attention of
the national Republican Party
874
00:37:53,933 --> 00:37:56,903
and they are sending money
and reinforcements.
875
00:37:56,936 --> 00:37:58,338
It's okay.
876
00:37:58,371 --> 00:38:01,341
It's exactly what
we wanted to happen.
877
00:38:02,410 --> 00:38:04,311
They are scared.
878
00:38:04,344 --> 00:38:06,913
On a national level,
879
00:38:06,946 --> 00:38:09,983
they are scared
of Colonel Jack.
880
00:38:11,452 --> 00:38:14,054
So we have to plan
our next move.
881
00:38:14,087 --> 00:38:15,355
Come here.
882
00:38:16,490 --> 00:38:18,124
Gather round.
883
00:38:18,158 --> 00:38:20,293
We're going to need...
884
00:38:20,327 --> 00:38:22,996
something a little like...
885
00:38:23,029 --> 00:38:25,065
that.
886
00:38:26,333 --> 00:38:28,201
Wow.
887
00:38:30,303 --> 00:38:31,871
And you scroll down.
888
00:38:31,905 --> 00:38:33,441
There's a "donate" button.
889
00:38:33,474 --> 00:38:37,043
Well, the money be
just one clicky away.
890
00:38:37,077 --> 00:38:39,979
And one clicky goes to where?
891
00:38:40,013 --> 00:38:41,214
Our website.
892
00:38:41,247 --> 00:38:43,883
Oh, we don't have a web...
893
00:38:46,052 --> 00:38:47,220
Oh, wow.
894
00:38:47,253 --> 00:38:49,889
Awesome.
895
00:38:49,923 --> 00:38:51,425
Good slogan, right?
896
00:38:51,459 --> 00:38:53,326
You were one step ahead
the whole time.
897
00:38:53,360 --> 00:38:55,929
Well, three or four,
but thank you very much.
898
00:38:55,962 --> 00:38:57,163
I will take that.
899
00:38:57,197 --> 00:38:58,666
Oh, wow.
900
00:39:25,024 --> 00:39:26,494
Mmm.
901
00:39:28,261 --> 00:39:30,230
Mmm.
902
00:39:30,263 --> 00:39:32,966
Know how I knew you were here?
903
00:39:32,999 --> 00:39:34,968
Your pussy tingled.
904
00:39:36,069 --> 00:39:38,171
Semicolon on the billboard.
905
00:39:38,204 --> 00:39:41,274
Classic Faith Brewster
over-punctuation.
906
00:39:41,307 --> 00:39:44,077
Look, Zim,
y'all punched your ticket
907
00:39:44,110 --> 00:39:48,114
on a changing demographic, and
now whitey don't want you back.
908
00:39:48,148 --> 00:39:51,985
Okay, Jeb, exclamation point.
909
00:39:52,018 --> 00:39:54,020
Why are you here?
910
00:39:54,053 --> 00:39:56,122
Because I enjoy
demoralizing you.
911
00:39:56,156 --> 00:39:58,426
Because crushing the last
piece of hope in your eyes
912
00:39:58,459 --> 00:40:00,026
really gets me off.
913
00:40:02,028 --> 00:40:05,098
You are a twisted fuck, Faith.
914
00:40:05,131 --> 00:40:07,200
And you don't know Jack.
915
00:40:07,233 --> 00:40:09,169
Please don't tell me that is
916
00:40:09,202 --> 00:40:11,971
the campaign slogan
you came up with.
917
00:40:14,207 --> 00:40:16,309
This guy, Zim,
he's not the last Jedi,
918
00:40:16,342 --> 00:40:18,278
and even if he were,
I'd still crush him
919
00:40:18,311 --> 00:40:20,046
because that's what I do.
920
00:40:20,079 --> 00:40:22,048
You realize, in that analogy,
you're Darth Vader.
921
00:40:22,081 --> 00:40:24,050
Whatever you say, nerd.
922
00:40:24,083 --> 00:40:25,318
- It's good to see you.
- Yeah.
923
00:40:25,351 --> 00:40:27,287
You look fat.
924
00:40:30,491 --> 00:40:32,426
Hmm.
925
00:40:32,460 --> 00:40:33,993
Divine, Ann.
926
00:40:34,027 --> 00:40:36,362
- You have to tell me your secret sometime.
- Mm.
927
00:40:39,332 --> 00:40:41,034
I would never tell you.
928
00:40:42,068 --> 00:40:44,070
I'll never tell her.
929
00:40:44,103 --> 00:40:46,206
- Cream, two sugars.
- Oh.
930
00:40:46,239 --> 00:40:48,341
- No, that's not how I take it.
- I know, but...
931
00:40:48,374 --> 00:40:50,143
Um, and here-here's
some streusel I made for you,
932
00:40:50,176 --> 00:40:51,779
- and, um, it's still warm.
- No, no, no, no, Ann, I can't.
933
00:40:51,812 --> 00:40:53,346
- And then these are cookies I made for you.
- I can't.
934
00:40:53,379 --> 00:40:54,380
- I'm getting fat. I can't do that.
- They're...
935
00:40:54,415 --> 00:40:55,281
- They're called the Garys, though.
- Thank you.
936
00:40:55,315 --> 00:40:57,083
- I made these...
- I know. I appreciate it.
937
00:40:57,116 --> 00:40:57,885
- Thank you. Okay.
- Yeah. Okay.
938
00:40:57,918 --> 00:40:59,152
- Okay, bye-bye.
- All right, then.
939
00:40:59,185 --> 00:41:00,186
Thank you. All right, then.
940
00:41:00,220 --> 00:41:01,254
- Bye-bye. Have a good day.
- Okay.
941
00:41:01,287 --> 00:41:03,323
Up all night for nothing.
942
00:41:03,356 --> 00:41:05,124
- Coming back. There you go.
- All right, just today.
943
00:41:05,158 --> 00:41:06,392
- Okay.
- Yeah. Thank you.
944
00:41:06,427 --> 00:41:07,795
Bye-bye, now. Bye-bye.
945
00:41:07,828 --> 00:41:09,262
Bye, Gar.
946
00:41:11,097 --> 00:41:12,433
Have a good one.
947
00:41:29,215 --> 00:41:31,384
- Okay, good night.
- Oh, hey.
948
00:41:31,418 --> 00:41:33,386
Good night. I didn't know
anybody else was here.
949
00:41:33,420 --> 00:41:34,588
I just wanted to make sure
950
00:41:34,622 --> 00:41:36,457
everything was set
for tomorrow.
951
00:41:36,490 --> 00:41:39,058
I was just finishing up
these pamphlets on immigration.
952
00:41:39,092 --> 00:41:40,293
Ooh.
953
00:41:40,326 --> 00:41:41,662
That sounds complicated.
954
00:41:41,695 --> 00:41:43,430
I hope the small minds
can manage.
955
00:41:45,265 --> 00:41:46,834
I'm sorry about that.
956
00:41:46,867 --> 00:41:49,503
Sometimes,
messaging for the base
957
00:41:49,537 --> 00:41:53,039
doesn't resonate
with the broader electorate.
958
00:41:53,874 --> 00:41:56,410
Oh, okay.
959
00:41:56,443 --> 00:42:01,114
So, to flatter them,
you have to condescend to us.
960
00:42:02,315 --> 00:42:04,418
I get it.
961
00:42:04,451 --> 00:42:07,320
Uh, no, no, that wasn't...
962
00:42:07,353 --> 00:42:09,456
that wasn't what...
963
00:42:14,428 --> 00:42:16,430
Sorry.
964
00:42:18,264 --> 00:42:19,700
How's your dad doing?
965
00:42:19,733 --> 00:42:21,635
Is he okay? Nervous?
966
00:42:21,669 --> 00:42:23,671
No.
967
00:42:23,704 --> 00:42:26,473
No? Well, why would he be?
He's been through a war.
968
00:42:26,507 --> 00:42:28,207
He's not gonna sweat
a fish fry.
969
00:42:28,241 --> 00:42:30,444
- No, he doesn't really get nervous.
- Mm-mm.
970
00:42:30,477 --> 00:42:32,378
Just quiet.
971
00:42:33,414 --> 00:42:35,281
Right.
972
00:42:39,753 --> 00:42:41,689
Runs in the family.
973
00:42:45,626 --> 00:42:49,362
- Maybe.
- Oh.
974
00:42:50,363 --> 00:42:51,699
Yes, my, uh...
975
00:42:51,732 --> 00:42:55,703
my mom was really
more of the talker.
976
00:42:55,736 --> 00:42:58,505
She was...
977
00:43:00,239 --> 00:43:02,643
You ever know anyone
that just lit up a room?
978
00:43:05,479 --> 00:43:06,680
Mm-hmm.
979
00:43:06,714 --> 00:43:08,381
Well, she was that.
980
00:43:08,415 --> 00:43:09,917
Yeah.
981
00:43:09,950 --> 00:43:11,652
- She sounds great.
- Yeah.
982
00:43:13,353 --> 00:43:16,322
So, why did your dad
get involved with all this?
983
00:43:16,356 --> 00:43:19,258
I mean, why speak
at that meeting?
984
00:43:19,292 --> 00:43:23,530
Why run when it involves
talking and people?
985
00:43:25,398 --> 00:43:28,702
I think he just loves
this town.
986
00:43:28,736 --> 00:43:32,673
You know, I think he'd do
anything to save it.
987
00:43:32,706 --> 00:43:35,174
What about you?
988
00:43:37,778 --> 00:43:40,547
Uh, I guess I would do
989
00:43:40,581 --> 00:43:44,250
just about anything
to save him.
990
00:43:55,529 --> 00:43:57,464
Okay. You have a good day, now.
991
00:43:57,498 --> 00:43:59,298
I'll just take one.
992
00:44:01,702 --> 00:44:03,404
Hey. How are you this evening?
993
00:44:03,437 --> 00:44:05,773
Pamphlet?
Vote for Colonel Jack.
994
00:44:05,806 --> 00:44:07,975
Colonel Jack pamphlet.
995
00:44:08,008 --> 00:44:09,677
Vote for Colonel Jack.
996
00:44:11,712 --> 00:44:13,447
How are y'all doing?
997
00:44:13,480 --> 00:44:14,715
...incredible database.
998
00:44:14,748 --> 00:44:16,583
- Yeah.
- And all your information is in there.
999
00:44:25,759 --> 00:44:27,828
Hey, Gary. Sorry I'm late.
1000
00:44:27,861 --> 00:44:30,329
I was just waiting for these
to get finished.
1001
00:44:30,363 --> 00:44:31,832
Beer Koozies might be
a little more helpful
1002
00:44:31,865 --> 00:44:33,467
than just the pamphlets.
1003
00:44:34,735 --> 00:44:37,303
And this is
actually very simple.
1004
00:44:37,336 --> 00:44:39,506
You just type in
your family's name...
1005
00:44:39,540 --> 00:44:41,642
How big is that booth?
1006
00:44:44,611 --> 00:44:46,013
- Faith.
- Gary.
1007
00:44:46,046 --> 00:44:48,582
You seem to be doing
a brisk business.
1008
00:44:48,615 --> 00:44:50,417
"Deerlaken: always."
1009
00:44:50,451 --> 00:44:52,385
So, apparently,
1010
00:44:52,419 --> 00:44:54,521
"Deerlaken über alles"
was copyrighted?
1011
00:44:54,555 --> 00:44:56,423
Well, we were gonna go with
"I'm with him"
1012
00:44:56,457 --> 00:44:58,257
until we remembered
how fucking stupid it sounded.
1013
00:44:58,291 --> 00:44:59,660
No, no, no, no.
I love it.
1014
00:44:59,693 --> 00:45:01,829
I love the whole
town genealogy angle.
1015
00:45:01,862 --> 00:45:03,664
It's got a real bold
1016
00:45:03,697 --> 00:45:05,666
"you ain't from around here"
flavor.
1017
00:45:05,699 --> 00:45:07,634
With subtle notes of,
1018
00:45:07,668 --> 00:45:09,470
uh, xenophobia.
1019
00:45:09,503 --> 00:45:11,472
Not to mention
the cognitive dissonance
1020
00:45:11,505 --> 00:45:13,774
that your booth is basically
a love letter to immigration.
1021
00:45:13,807 --> 00:45:15,274
That's a great observation.
1022
00:45:15,308 --> 00:45:16,777
So all these people
are hypocrites?
1023
00:45:16,810 --> 00:45:18,679
- I'd run with that.
- All you have is fear.
1024
00:45:18,712 --> 00:45:20,047
Now we're getting somewhere.
1025
00:45:20,080 --> 00:45:21,749
20 bucks says
I do better with fear
1026
00:45:21,782 --> 00:45:23,050
than you do with shame.
1027
00:45:23,083 --> 00:45:24,317
- Oh.
- Okay.
1028
00:45:24,350 --> 00:45:25,586
It's all set, Miss Brewster.
1029
00:45:25,619 --> 00:45:27,488
Thank you, sweetie.
1030
00:45:27,521 --> 00:45:29,757
Well, well, well.
1031
00:45:29,790 --> 00:45:31,692
I'm really sorry, Mr. Z.
1032
00:45:31,725 --> 00:45:33,727
I like working
with you guys, but...
1033
00:45:33,761 --> 00:45:35,829
I'm saving up for a car,
and she's paying us.
1034
00:45:35,863 --> 00:45:37,664
"Eh, she's paying us."
1035
00:45:37,698 --> 00:45:41,902
Wow, way to stand up for
what you believe in there...
1036
00:45:41,935 --> 00:45:44,538
- M... Michael.
- It's Michael.
1037
00:45:44,571 --> 00:45:46,473
- Michael. I know his name is Michael.
- His name is Michael.
1038
00:45:46,507 --> 00:45:47,674
- No, you don't.
- I know it.
1039
00:45:47,708 --> 00:45:49,710
- I was pausing for effect, Michael.
- It's okay, Michael.
1040
00:45:49,743 --> 00:45:52,613
- Character is destiny, Michael.
- Oh, don't listen to him.
1041
00:45:52,646 --> 00:45:54,548
- Character is destiny.
- He's a jerk. Oof.
1042
00:45:54,581 --> 00:45:55,849
Good burn.
1043
00:45:55,883 --> 00:45:57,785
Jack has lived here
for 30 years.
1044
00:45:57,818 --> 00:45:59,653
You really think
you can run a campaign
1045
00:45:59,686 --> 00:46:01,655
that paints him
as a carpetbagger?
1046
00:46:01,688 --> 00:46:04,390
Probably not, but I think I can
run one that says you are.
1047
00:46:04,424 --> 00:46:05,793
- Beer Koozie?
- Oh, my God.
1048
00:46:07,427 --> 00:46:09,663
Oh. Hastings Koozie?
1049
00:46:09,696 --> 00:46:11,665
- Yeah.
- Touché.
1050
00:46:11,698 --> 00:46:12,833
That's right.
That's in our booth.
1051
00:46:12,866 --> 00:46:14,868
- What do you think of that?
- Yeah, I'll take one.
1052
00:46:14,902 --> 00:46:17,404
What do you think of that
right there?
1053
00:46:17,437 --> 00:46:19,606
Boom, boom. What do you think of that?
1054
00:46:19,640 --> 00:46:21,508
- I don't...
- Oh.
1055
00:46:21,542 --> 00:46:23,577
Sorry. Not you, Dot.
1056
00:46:24,845 --> 00:46:26,814
- Hi.
- Oh, Dot.
1057
00:46:33,453 --> 00:46:34,922
Oh.
1058
00:46:44,698 --> 00:46:46,700
Oh.
1059
00:46:58,812 --> 00:47:00,480
Whoa.
1060
00:47:16,830 --> 00:47:18,699
We're not doing this.
1061
00:47:18,732 --> 00:47:19,867
What?
1062
00:47:19,900 --> 00:47:21,735
Ugh.
1063
00:47:21,768 --> 00:47:24,771
You go through my stuff?
1064
00:47:26,473 --> 00:47:28,408
Why here?
You have your own room.
1065
00:47:28,442 --> 00:47:29,910
I don't want to smoke alone.
1066
00:47:29,943 --> 00:47:31,511
Oh, come on. Are...
1067
00:47:31,545 --> 00:47:32,846
Really?
1068
00:47:34,615 --> 00:47:37,684
Gary, I'm bored.
1069
00:47:37,718 --> 00:47:39,753
Please, can we just forget it?
1070
00:47:39,786 --> 00:47:40,921
You've made your point.
1071
00:47:40,954 --> 00:47:42,623
There's Democrats
with calloused hands.
1072
00:47:42,656 --> 00:47:45,459
Gonna bode very well
for the midterms, I promise.
1073
00:47:45,492 --> 00:47:46,927
Now, can we just all go back
to Washington
1074
00:47:46,960 --> 00:47:49,429
and forget that we ever
made camp in a place
1075
00:47:49,463 --> 00:47:51,899
where the shit you skim
off milk is considered a food?
1076
00:47:51,932 --> 00:47:54,568
They are called cheese curds,
and they are delicious.
1077
00:47:54,601 --> 00:47:55,736
They're disgusting.
1078
00:47:55,769 --> 00:47:57,571
And you can't make poutine
without them.
1079
00:47:57,604 --> 00:47:59,006
- Come on. Please.
- Go.
1080
00:47:59,039 --> 00:48:00,974
You can go.
You don't have to be here.
1081
00:48:01,008 --> 00:48:02,743
I made these people a promise.
1082
00:48:02,776 --> 00:48:04,011
I'm a good person.
1083
00:48:04,044 --> 00:48:05,545
It's your last chance, Zim.
1084
00:48:05,579 --> 00:48:07,014
I'm gonna make
a big deal of this.
1085
00:48:07,047 --> 00:48:09,716
Tons of press, lots of money.
You're gonna lose,
1086
00:48:09,750 --> 00:48:11,718
and then you're gonna look
like a giant asshole.
1087
00:48:11,752 --> 00:48:13,220
Good. That's what I want.
1088
00:48:13,253 --> 00:48:16,890
Not the asshole but for you
to make a big deal of this.
1089
00:48:16,924 --> 00:48:19,526
I want it to be a big deal.
It is a big deal.
1090
00:48:19,559 --> 00:48:21,028
Well, let's make it
interesting.
1091
00:48:21,061 --> 00:48:22,195
Okay, why don't we?
1092
00:48:22,229 --> 00:48:25,799
The loser has to eat the
winner's pussy out for an hour.
1093
00:48:25,832 --> 00:48:29,569
You better grab a big old bib,
'cause it's chow time.
1094
00:48:30,871 --> 00:48:32,539
Dick chow time.
1095
00:48:32,572 --> 00:48:34,074
'Cause I'm gonna win,
1096
00:48:34,107 --> 00:48:36,944
- and you're gonna have to eat my dick for an hour.
- Wha...
1097
00:48:36,977 --> 00:48:38,679
And you know something?
1098
00:48:38,712 --> 00:48:40,747
That's a long time,
dick-eating-wise.
1099
00:48:42,950 --> 00:48:45,085
A long time!
1100
00:48:45,118 --> 00:48:47,487
To eat my dick.
1101
00:48:51,591 --> 00:48:53,060
In a dangerous world
1102
00:48:53,093 --> 00:48:54,828
gone mad...
1103
00:48:54,861 --> 00:48:57,097
we need emotionally stable
leadership.
1104
00:48:59,599 --> 00:49:01,868
Only Mayor Braun
is stable enough
1105
00:49:01,902 --> 00:49:04,104
to keep Deerlaken safe,
1106
00:49:04,137 --> 00:49:06,707
to keep Deerlaken Deerlaken.
1107
00:49:08,542 --> 00:49:10,010
I got you.
1108
00:49:10,043 --> 00:49:13,013
I'm Mayor Braun,
and I approve this message.
1109
00:49:13,046 --> 00:49:14,281
Here.
1110
00:49:14,314 --> 00:49:16,717
Paid for by
Traditional Wisconsin Families
1111
00:49:16,750 --> 00:49:18,051
for Faith and Freedom.
1112
00:49:20,954 --> 00:49:22,990
They've taken the office
just across from mine.
1113
00:49:23,023 --> 00:49:24,291
They're definitely ramping up,
1114
00:49:24,324 --> 00:49:26,626
so I'm gonna need
the full crew.
1115
00:49:26,660 --> 00:49:29,663
If Zimmer wants to take a stand
in Turdsville, USA,
1116
00:49:29,696 --> 00:49:31,298
I say we bury him here.
1117
00:49:31,331 --> 00:49:32,766
Sorry.
1118
00:49:32,799 --> 00:49:34,034
Not a turd.
1119
00:49:34,067 --> 00:49:35,869
Heart and soul of America.
1120
00:49:35,902 --> 00:49:37,871
Get me the nerdy guy
from analytics.
1121
00:49:37,904 --> 00:49:40,574
- Who's that?
- I don't know his name.
1122
00:49:40,607 --> 00:49:42,309
He wears glasses and plaid.
1123
00:49:42,342 --> 00:49:44,578
- Has a very complicated beard.
- Which one?
1124
00:49:44,611 --> 00:49:47,647
How the fuck does that
not narrow it down? I...
1125
00:49:47,681 --> 00:49:49,916
- God fucking damn it.
- What?
1126
00:49:49,950 --> 00:49:52,619
And send me everyone
by yesterday.
1127
00:49:52,652 --> 00:49:54,021
I'll get on it.
1128
00:50:06,666 --> 00:50:08,135
Sor... Hey, Dot.
1129
00:50:10,971 --> 00:50:12,572
- Gary.
- Hey, big guy?
1130
00:50:12,606 --> 00:50:14,641
- Yes.
- We got a problem.
1131
00:50:15,942 --> 00:50:17,110
What's up?
1132
00:50:17,144 --> 00:50:19,613
Having trouble
rounding up focus groups?
1133
00:50:19,646 --> 00:50:20,781
No.
1134
00:50:20,814 --> 00:50:22,082
Shh.
1135
00:50:25,385 --> 00:50:27,721
I don't even know what to say.
1136
00:50:27,754 --> 00:50:29,923
Hey, hey, everybody.
1137
00:50:29,956 --> 00:50:32,759
Do we know why we have dial-up
in this space?
1138
00:50:32,793 --> 00:50:33,960
Duffy had it upgraded
1139
00:50:33,994 --> 00:50:35,829
right before
he closed the shop.
1140
00:50:35,862 --> 00:50:36,863
Upgraded from what?
1141
00:50:38,098 --> 00:50:40,100
- Nothing.
- Well, is there any way
1142
00:50:40,133 --> 00:50:42,202
we can piggyback Wi-Fi
from someplace?
1143
00:50:42,235 --> 00:50:44,871
Uh, there's a place where the
kids go and they do homework
1144
00:50:44,905 --> 00:50:46,073
and they play games
and whatnot.
1145
00:50:46,106 --> 00:50:48,775
- I know the password.
- Okay.
1146
00:50:48,809 --> 00:50:50,844
- Solving problems.
- Nice!
1147
00:51:02,022 --> 00:51:05,959
Listen, I... I don't think
you're allowed to be here
1148
00:51:05,992 --> 00:51:09,096
unless you're on official
school business, so...
1149
00:51:09,129 --> 00:51:11,765
Okay, look, uh, Officer...
1150
00:51:11,798 --> 00:51:13,667
- Tommy.
- Officer Tommy.
1151
00:51:13,700 --> 00:51:16,203
Um, we are with
the Hastings campaign,
1152
00:51:16,236 --> 00:51:18,772
and we're trying to get
some work done here.
1153
00:51:18,805 --> 00:51:20,207
It's sort of time-sensitive.
1154
00:51:20,240 --> 00:51:23,243
So... um, okay, here we go.
1155
00:51:23,276 --> 00:51:25,178
Here is a pen.
1156
00:51:25,212 --> 00:51:27,415
- Okay.
- And...
1157
00:51:27,448 --> 00:51:29,850
- one of these beer thingies.
- Koozie.
1158
00:51:29,883 --> 00:51:32,719
Koozie, and, uh...
1159
00:51:32,752 --> 00:51:34,921
thank you for your service.
1160
00:51:48,068 --> 00:51:50,804
Oh, for God sakes.
1161
00:51:52,139 --> 00:51:55,175
Hello, boys.
1162
00:51:55,208 --> 00:51:57,043
Gentlemen, these are children!
1163
00:51:57,077 --> 00:51:58,812
- Hey. - Hi.
- Children!
1164
00:51:58,845 --> 00:52:01,248
- Great job, guys.
- And do you know what that looked like?
1165
00:52:01,281 --> 00:52:03,016
Sitting in your car?
1166
00:52:03,049 --> 00:52:05,118
A bunch of boys
on the computer?
1167
00:52:11,324 --> 00:52:13,760
No, no, no. Thank you.
1168
00:52:13,793 --> 00:52:16,796
So, I see they sprung you
from detention, huh?
1169
00:52:16,830 --> 00:52:18,265
Yeah, apparently,
small-town hospitality
1170
00:52:18,298 --> 00:52:20,468
doesn't apply to Wi-Fi.
1171
00:52:20,501 --> 00:52:22,135
They're not too keen
on strangers staking out
1172
00:52:22,169 --> 00:52:24,137
a school parking lot...
you know, kids and all.
1173
00:52:24,171 --> 00:52:25,939
Yeah, in hindsight,
that makes complete sense.
1174
00:52:25,972 --> 00:52:27,174
Mm-hmm.
1175
00:52:27,207 --> 00:52:29,176
Guys, could I talk to you
for a sec?
1176
00:52:29,209 --> 00:52:30,310
- Yeah.
- My office.
1177
00:52:30,343 --> 00:52:32,279
Come on in. Have a seat.
1178
00:52:32,312 --> 00:52:34,181
You can leave the door open.
1179
00:52:34,214 --> 00:52:35,982
Here's the deal.
1180
00:52:36,016 --> 00:52:38,318
Our opponents are pumping
way more into this
1181
00:52:38,351 --> 00:52:40,253
than I ever expected them to.
1182
00:52:40,287 --> 00:52:43,256
- Huh.
- This rinky-dink stuff is not gonna fly.
1183
00:52:43,290 --> 00:52:45,325
We need to up
our fundraising game.
1184
00:52:45,358 --> 00:52:47,260
Okay. That's...
1185
00:52:47,294 --> 00:52:50,130
Sure. Do you want to do, uh,
like, a street fair or...?
1186
00:52:50,163 --> 00:52:52,132
That's a good idea.
1187
00:52:52,165 --> 00:52:53,800
No, it's not a good idea.
1188
00:52:53,833 --> 00:52:55,936
Don't... No, we're not
gonna do that.
1189
00:52:55,969 --> 00:52:57,971
Have you ever been to New York?
1190
00:53:01,374 --> 00:53:03,777
Oh, my God, please unplug it.
1191
00:53:03,810 --> 00:53:05,212
Please unplug it.
1192
00:53:06,813 --> 00:53:08,815
Unplug it!
1193
00:53:10,317 --> 00:53:12,919
I'm just looking
at the guest list here.
1194
00:53:12,953 --> 00:53:15,155
Great. Great turnout.
1195
00:53:15,188 --> 00:53:17,958
Especially considering
the short notice.
1196
00:53:17,991 --> 00:53:19,326
Really good.
1197
00:53:20,961 --> 00:53:23,830
Mmm. You ever have
one of those?
1198
00:53:25,966 --> 00:53:27,934
Yeah, green beans.
1199
00:53:27,968 --> 00:53:29,236
Haricot vert.
1200
00:53:30,837 --> 00:53:33,907
Isn't that French
for "green beans"?
1201
00:53:33,940 --> 00:53:36,243
These are more delicate.
1202
00:53:36,276 --> 00:53:38,078
Thinner, more flavorful.
1203
00:53:41,114 --> 00:53:43,917
- I didn't know you spoke French.
- Mm.
1204
00:53:46,587 --> 00:53:48,154
Would you like something?
1205
00:53:48,188 --> 00:53:50,290
No, no.
1206
00:53:53,427 --> 00:53:55,762
This too loud?
1207
00:54:26,192 --> 00:54:27,861
Richard and Ginnie Peeler
1208
00:54:27,894 --> 00:54:28,862
are hosting.
1209
00:54:28,895 --> 00:54:30,196
He's a hedge fund swell.
1210
00:54:30,230 --> 00:54:32,399
She's been saving the Hudson
for about 25 years.
1211
00:54:32,433 --> 00:54:34,267
Richard Peeler. Yeah?
1212
00:54:34,301 --> 00:54:36,069
Got it.
1213
00:54:38,104 --> 00:54:40,106
Are you, like, 12?
1214
00:54:43,343 --> 00:54:45,413
It's not only that
the sand traps are deeper,
1215
00:54:45,446 --> 00:54:47,881
but the quality
of the sand at...
1216
00:54:47,914 --> 00:54:49,282
Excuse me. Gary! Hey.
1217
00:54:49,316 --> 00:54:51,318
Dick Peeler.
1218
00:54:51,351 --> 00:54:54,020
Gary, thank you for coming.
1219
00:54:54,054 --> 00:54:56,089
Oh, my pleasure.
Thanks for having us.
1220
00:54:56,122 --> 00:54:57,390
Well, we're
really, really excited.
1221
00:54:57,425 --> 00:54:59,859
We're excited. Jack! Jack!
1222
00:54:59,893 --> 00:55:01,294
I'd like you to meet
Richard Peeler.
1223
00:55:01,328 --> 00:55:02,395
- What an honor.
- Colonel Jack Hastings.
1224
00:55:02,430 --> 00:55:04,197
- Oh.
- Very nice to meet you.
1225
00:55:04,230 --> 00:55:06,199
- Thank you for... having us.
- Oh, it's really an honor.
1226
00:55:06,232 --> 00:55:08,234
- And, uh...
- Yeah.
1227
00:55:08,268 --> 00:55:11,037
No, it's, uh, you know,
the authentic thing here.
1228
00:55:11,071 --> 00:55:12,406
I see that. It's amazing.
1229
00:55:12,440 --> 00:55:14,307
Uh, can I get you
something to drink?
1230
00:55:14,341 --> 00:55:16,042
Sure. What would you like?
1231
00:55:16,076 --> 00:55:19,112
Uh, I'd like a little, uh, tea.
1232
00:55:19,145 --> 00:55:21,114
Chamomile if you have it.
1233
00:55:21,147 --> 00:55:22,349
All right.
1234
00:55:22,382 --> 00:55:23,950
That's fine.
You want a Scotch.
1235
00:55:23,983 --> 00:55:25,251
- Yes, please.
- Yes, I know that.
1236
00:55:33,093 --> 00:55:34,928
He's a criminal.
1237
00:55:34,961 --> 00:55:36,162
Oh, thank you.
1238
00:55:36,196 --> 00:55:37,364
He's a criminal.
1239
00:55:37,397 --> 00:55:38,998
Trust me,
I've done deals with him.
1240
00:55:39,032 --> 00:55:40,468
Our democracy is falling apart.
1241
00:55:40,501 --> 00:55:41,968
We're gonna lose it.
1242
00:55:42,001 --> 00:55:43,471
Tom Friedman had a great line.
1243
00:55:43,504 --> 00:55:45,905
I like to say he's
the Bitcoin of presidents.
1244
00:55:45,939 --> 00:55:47,675
Her whole dress line
was made in China.
1245
00:55:47,708 --> 00:55:49,443
The man is mentally ill.
1246
00:55:49,477 --> 00:55:51,077
Fuckface von Clownstick.
1247
00:55:51,111 --> 00:55:52,912
I'm mad? We should all be mad.
1248
00:55:52,946 --> 00:55:55,248
I mean, what kind
of person hunts elephants?
1249
00:55:55,281 --> 00:55:57,518
And there's not a whole lot
of the, um...
1250
00:55:57,551 --> 00:55:59,119
What did you call that?
1251
00:55:59,152 --> 00:56:01,121
- Uh, farm-to-table.
- The farm-to-table.
1252
00:56:01,154 --> 00:56:05,358
I mean, I guess
it all kind of, uh...
1253
00:56:05,392 --> 00:56:10,163
all goes from farms to tables
of some kind.
1254
00:56:13,434 --> 00:56:16,102
We're so excited
that you're all here.
1255
00:56:16,136 --> 00:56:18,304
And we are so thankful
1256
00:56:18,338 --> 00:56:20,408
to our old friend
for presenting us
1257
00:56:20,441 --> 00:56:24,077
with another informative and,
uh, just stimulating evening.
1258
00:56:24,110 --> 00:56:26,212
Oh.
1259
00:56:26,246 --> 00:56:28,148
You know him. You love him.
1260
00:56:28,181 --> 00:56:29,949
And sometimes hate.
1261
00:56:29,983 --> 00:56:33,052
- Hate writing the checks, but, uh, you know.
- Yeah.
1262
00:56:34,287 --> 00:56:36,424
- Gary.
- Thank you. Thanks so much.
1263
00:56:36,457 --> 00:56:38,091
Thanks for coming.
1264
00:56:38,124 --> 00:56:39,292
And thank you...
1265
00:56:39,325 --> 00:56:41,429
Keep that going
for the Peelers, please.
1266
00:56:41,462 --> 00:56:44,164
Their tremendous hospitality.
1267
00:56:44,197 --> 00:56:46,434
Listen, I'm not gonna take up
too much of your time
1268
00:56:46,467 --> 00:56:49,269
other than to say
thank you all for being here.
1269
00:56:49,302 --> 00:56:52,305
One thing I do want to say,
though, is that
1270
00:56:52,338 --> 00:56:56,209
Colonel Jack Hastings
is the embodiment
1271
00:56:56,242 --> 00:56:58,378
of America's real greatness.
1272
00:56:58,412 --> 00:57:02,382
Service to nation,
hard work, faith.
1273
00:57:02,416 --> 00:57:05,486
Republicans don't own
those values, do they?
1274
00:57:05,519 --> 00:57:07,220
They don't own 'em.
1275
00:57:07,253 --> 00:57:09,189
They can't.
1276
00:57:09,222 --> 00:57:10,491
Inclusion.
1277
00:57:10,524 --> 00:57:12,192
That's the most important
of all.
1278
00:57:12,225 --> 00:57:14,194
But sometimes,
we get comfortable
1279
00:57:14,227 --> 00:57:16,062
in our own little
ideological bubbles.
1280
00:57:16,095 --> 00:57:17,465
I see them.
1281
00:57:17,498 --> 00:57:19,365
You can't see them,
necessarily, but I see 'em.
1282
00:57:19,399 --> 00:57:20,768
There's a little bubble there.
1283
00:57:20,801 --> 00:57:22,603
There's a little bubble there.
1284
00:57:22,636 --> 00:57:25,071
And we forget to reach out.
1285
00:57:25,104 --> 00:57:27,541
To find empathy
and understanding
1286
00:57:27,575 --> 00:57:31,344
across religious or racial
1287
00:57:31,377 --> 00:57:34,214
or just plain geographical
boundaries.
1288
00:57:34,247 --> 00:57:37,183
And I hope tonight changes
that, even just a little bit.
1289
00:57:38,218 --> 00:57:40,421
So, without further ado,
1290
00:57:40,454 --> 00:57:43,056
I would like you to join me
in welcoming
1291
00:57:43,089 --> 00:57:46,594
the next mayor of
Deerlaken, Wisconsin,
1292
00:57:46,627 --> 00:57:49,128
Colonel Jack Hastings.
1293
00:57:49,162 --> 00:57:51,197
Hear, hear.
1294
00:57:55,636 --> 00:57:58,572
Uh, uh... thanks, folks.
1295
00:57:58,606 --> 00:58:01,809
And thanks to Gary
1296
00:58:01,842 --> 00:58:04,645
- and to the Peelers.
- Thank you.
1297
00:58:04,678 --> 00:58:07,380
Wow, this is a great house.
1298
00:58:07,414 --> 00:58:09,349
It's a great house.
1299
00:58:09,382 --> 00:58:11,485
Um...
1300
00:58:13,353 --> 00:58:16,122
I see some of you are...
1301
00:58:16,155 --> 00:58:18,559
wondering what I'm doing here.
1302
00:58:19,560 --> 00:58:21,094
And...
1303
00:58:22,295 --> 00:58:24,999
I think I'm wondering the same.
1304
00:58:26,232 --> 00:58:27,635
Uh...
1305
00:58:27,668 --> 00:58:30,036
I guess that's the point.
1306
00:58:31,438 --> 00:58:35,074
Without all this,
you might never have met me.
1307
00:58:35,108 --> 00:58:38,445
And I certainly
wouldn't have met you.
1308
00:58:39,680 --> 00:58:41,314
But...
1309
00:58:42,716 --> 00:58:45,051
...uh, now we have.
1310
00:58:47,888 --> 00:58:50,424
So, uh...
1311
00:58:53,259 --> 00:58:54,428
Um...
1312
00:58:54,461 --> 00:58:56,296
Colonel, Colonel.
1313
00:58:56,329 --> 00:58:58,632
- Yeah.
- Gary Zimmer from "The D.C. Bugle."
1314
00:58:58,666 --> 00:59:01,234
Um, why...
1315
00:59:01,267 --> 00:59:05,271
why should a bunch of uptight
Upper West Siders care about
1316
00:59:05,305 --> 00:59:07,106
a little town in Wisconsin?
1317
00:59:08,909 --> 00:59:11,412
Uh, it's hard to say.
1318
00:59:12,479 --> 00:59:14,582
I guess we're hurting,
1319
00:59:14,615 --> 00:59:17,618
looking for help from you.
1320
00:59:19,920 --> 00:59:21,589
What can we do to help?
1321
00:59:21,622 --> 00:59:23,724
I'll take that. Money.
1322
00:59:23,757 --> 00:59:25,659
Money.
1323
00:59:25,693 --> 00:59:28,596
It's a serious question,
actually.
1324
00:59:28,629 --> 00:59:31,498
You know,
our politics seem broken.
1325
00:59:31,532 --> 00:59:36,102
Colonel, what do you see is
the system's greatest weakness?
1326
00:59:39,205 --> 00:59:42,710
Hmm, well, I guess,
for one thing,
1327
00:59:42,743 --> 00:59:45,311
this.
1328
00:59:45,345 --> 00:59:47,113
Here, tonight.
1329
00:59:48,582 --> 00:59:51,619
And I mean no disrespect.
1330
00:59:52,953 --> 00:59:56,289
I just think
this seems a bit crazy.
1331
00:59:56,322 --> 00:59:58,391
I want to help my town.
1332
00:59:58,425 --> 01:00:00,360
I want to be mayor,
1333
01:00:00,393 --> 01:00:03,497
some town in the middle
of Wisconsin.
1334
01:00:03,530 --> 01:00:05,466
So, instead of being home
1335
01:00:05,499 --> 01:00:08,502
working on some smart things
to help my town,
1336
01:00:08,535 --> 01:00:11,405
I have to fly here to your town
1337
01:00:11,438 --> 01:00:14,374
and convince you
that my town's worth saving.
1338
01:00:14,408 --> 01:00:17,243
And that I'm worth it.
1339
01:00:17,276 --> 01:00:20,714
And that saving it
is worth it to you.
1340
01:00:20,748 --> 01:00:23,216
All so you can give me
some money.
1341
01:00:23,249 --> 01:00:26,219
Not for my town, but for me.
1342
01:00:26,252 --> 01:00:30,658
To help convince my town
that I'm worth it.
1343
01:00:32,559 --> 01:00:35,729
I mean...
1344
01:00:35,763 --> 01:00:40,366
I don't know,
it just sounds so stupid.
1345
01:00:55,449 --> 01:00:57,216
Still crying?
1346
01:00:58,652 --> 01:01:00,821
A little bit.
1347
01:01:00,854 --> 01:01:02,489
Mm.
1348
01:01:04,024 --> 01:01:08,696
You gonna do that
all the way home?
1349
01:01:08,729 --> 01:01:10,531
Yes.
1350
01:01:13,567 --> 01:01:15,569
Why?
1351
01:01:16,737 --> 01:01:18,706
Because the seat belt sign
is on
1352
01:01:18,739 --> 01:01:21,675
and I can't get up to hug you.
1353
01:01:21,709 --> 01:01:24,611
Damn, Jack.
1354
01:01:24,645 --> 01:01:27,313
You walked in there,
1355
01:01:27,346 --> 01:01:30,383
into the lion's den
like that...
1356
01:01:30,417 --> 01:01:31,452
Daniel.
1357
01:01:31,485 --> 01:01:33,319
Yeah, and just...
1358
01:01:33,352 --> 01:01:36,457
you told 'em, straight up,
this isn't right.
1359
01:01:36,490 --> 01:01:38,592
This is wrong.
The system is corrupt.
1360
01:01:38,625 --> 01:01:40,794
I'm out
of order? You're out of order.
1361
01:01:40,828 --> 01:01:42,496
The whole damn system's
out of order!
1362
01:01:42,529 --> 01:01:44,832
Attica! Att...
1363
01:01:46,467 --> 01:01:48,469
Money.
1364
01:01:48,502 --> 01:01:52,740
Oh, God, their money
is the problem?
1365
01:01:52,773 --> 01:01:55,442
Oh!
1366
01:01:55,476 --> 01:01:57,044
You should've seen their faces.
1367
01:01:57,077 --> 01:01:58,645
I saw.
1368
01:01:58,679 --> 01:02:02,416
They ate it up.
1369
01:02:02,449 --> 01:02:04,752
We could've named our price.
1370
01:02:07,521 --> 01:02:09,288
Oh, no way Faith matches.
1371
01:02:09,322 --> 01:02:11,525
- And why is that, now?
- Oh.
1372
01:02:11,558 --> 01:02:14,628
Because they're spending
to stop something,
1373
01:02:14,661 --> 01:02:16,697
and we're spending
to start something.
1374
01:02:17,831 --> 01:02:19,700
Hmm.
1375
01:02:19,733 --> 01:02:21,635
I'm mad as hell,
1376
01:02:21,668 --> 01:02:24,071
and I can't take it anymore!
1377
01:02:24,104 --> 01:02:26,540
Oh!
1378
01:02:26,573 --> 01:02:28,742
Gary, you... green bean?
1379
01:02:28,776 --> 01:02:30,444
No.
1380
01:02:30,477 --> 01:02:32,378
Okay. No, thank you.
1381
01:02:34,448 --> 01:02:36,483
Wow.
1382
01:02:36,517 --> 01:02:38,919
I'm telling you,
he is the real deal.
1383
01:02:38,952 --> 01:02:41,789
It is like a Bill Clinton
with impulse control.
1384
01:02:41,822 --> 01:02:43,824
Like a churchgoing
Bernie Sanders
1385
01:02:43,857 --> 01:02:45,626
with better bone density.
1386
01:02:45,659 --> 01:02:47,393
- He... Oh, here they are.
- Hello. Good morning.
1387
01:02:47,427 --> 01:02:48,796
Here they are.
1388
01:02:48,829 --> 01:02:50,798
Ladies and gentlemen,
the next mayor of Deerlaken
1389
01:02:50,831 --> 01:02:52,398
and his talented
first daughter.
1390
01:02:52,432 --> 01:02:54,434
- Please join me.
- You are fired up, huh?
1391
01:02:54,468 --> 01:02:56,603
I am fired...
Why wouldn't I be fired up?
1392
01:02:56,637 --> 01:03:00,808
I am working with the future
of the Democratic Party here.
1393
01:03:00,841 --> 01:03:03,911
Oh, your dad the other night
was transcendent.
1394
01:03:03,944 --> 01:03:05,746
He crushed it.
1395
01:03:05,779 --> 01:03:07,915
And because of that,
I'd like to show you
1396
01:03:07,948 --> 01:03:10,450
the fruits of your labor.
1397
01:03:10,484 --> 01:03:14,421
Because he was so good,
I was able to hire...
1398
01:03:14,454 --> 01:03:15,889
the "A" team.
1399
01:03:15,923 --> 01:03:17,825
- Mm-hmm.
- I'm just kidding.
1400
01:03:17,858 --> 01:03:19,493
They're not the "A" team.
1401
01:03:19,526 --> 01:03:20,861
Not that you aren't great.
1402
01:03:20,894 --> 01:03:23,664
But this...
1403
01:03:23,697 --> 01:03:24,932
is the real "A" team.
1404
01:03:24,965 --> 01:03:26,834
I get it,
but what are the numbers?
1405
01:03:32,472 --> 01:03:33,707
- You know Kurt Lehman, polling and modeling.
- Oh, my God.
1406
01:03:33,740 --> 01:03:35,374
- Yes. Hi.
- Hi.
1407
01:03:35,409 --> 01:03:36,877
- He gives us a window into the electorate.
- Hi. - Hey.
1408
01:03:36,910 --> 01:03:38,645
- How are you?
- Best in the business.
1409
01:03:38,679 --> 01:03:40,414
When everyone was
predicting Hillary
1410
01:03:40,447 --> 01:03:43,150
in a landslide over Trump,
Kurt was the one guy
1411
01:03:43,183 --> 01:03:45,953
who had her
just barely beating him.
1412
01:03:45,986 --> 01:03:49,456
My models just picked up the
trend lines, so...
1413
01:03:49,489 --> 01:03:51,458
If the election had taken place
a month or two later...
1414
01:03:51,491 --> 01:03:54,161
My numbers would've been
100% on the money.
1415
01:03:54,194 --> 01:03:55,929
- Mm-hmm.
- Wow.
1416
01:03:55,963 --> 01:03:57,598
Impressive.
1417
01:03:57,631 --> 01:03:58,765
Well...
1418
01:03:58,799 --> 01:04:00,534
Well, he was the least wrong.
1419
01:04:00,567 --> 01:04:02,169
Tina Kuryev, analytics.
1420
01:04:02,202 --> 01:04:03,804
She gives us a window
into the voters.
1421
01:04:03,837 --> 01:04:05,439
Good to meet you, sir.
1422
01:04:05,472 --> 01:04:07,941
Oh. I thought, uh,
polling did that.
1423
01:04:07,975 --> 01:04:10,677
- It does.
- Well, he tells you how he thinks they feel.
1424
01:04:10,711 --> 01:04:12,613
I tell you how
they really feel.
1425
01:04:14,615 --> 01:04:17,484
- People are liars.
- Here we go.
1426
01:04:17,517 --> 01:04:20,587
He can tell you how often
people say they go to church.
1427
01:04:20,621 --> 01:04:21,989
She can tell you
if they actually go.
1428
01:04:22,022 --> 01:04:24,191
I can tell you
if God is in their hearts.
1429
01:04:24,224 --> 01:04:25,692
- Oh, my God.
- Tina's in online analytics.
1430
01:04:25,726 --> 01:04:27,194
Hey, can I just say...
1431
01:04:27,227 --> 01:04:29,696
we take deception into account,
too, okay?
1432
01:04:29,730 --> 01:04:31,765
Yeah, polling is
an art form, but,
1433
01:04:31,798 --> 01:04:34,034
you know, there's plenty
of science to back it up.
1434
01:04:34,067 --> 01:04:36,536
Says the guy
still calling landlines.
1435
01:04:36,570 --> 01:04:38,872
People tell computers
the truth, right?
1436
01:04:38,906 --> 01:04:40,974
Their desires,
their prejudices.
1437
01:04:41,008 --> 01:04:42,910
Every search,
every transaction...
1438
01:04:42,943 --> 01:04:44,912
it's an unguarded
private moment.
1439
01:04:44,945 --> 01:04:48,215
So there's no, uh,
margin of error, you know?
1440
01:04:48,248 --> 01:04:50,984
The digital footprint
is your true self.
1441
01:04:51,018 --> 01:04:53,220
But, surely,
people are more complicated
1442
01:04:53,253 --> 01:04:55,522
than their online transactions.
1443
01:04:55,555 --> 01:04:57,557
Well, says the woman
with three cats
1444
01:04:57,591 --> 01:04:59,960
and an intense search history
of the herpes virus.
1445
01:05:06,099 --> 01:05:08,035
One of the cats...
1446
01:05:08,068 --> 01:05:09,937
Is this legal?
1447
01:05:09,970 --> 01:05:12,739
Law enforcement
or in the eyes of God?
1448
01:05:15,609 --> 01:05:18,045
With two weeks to go
until election day,
1449
01:05:18,078 --> 01:05:20,547
we have an update
on the Deerlaken mayoral race.
1450
01:05:20,580 --> 01:05:22,549
The race between
Colonel Jack Hastings
1451
01:05:22,582 --> 01:05:25,852
and incumbent Mayor Billy Braun
is tightening.
1452
01:05:25,886 --> 01:05:27,788
Who here has been chosen
as 527s?
1453
01:05:27,821 --> 01:05:28,822
Raise your hands, please.
1454
01:05:28,855 --> 01:05:31,825
One, two, three, four. Good.
1455
01:05:31,858 --> 01:05:33,827
You all run super PACs now.
1456
01:05:33,860 --> 01:05:37,998
You are no longer associated
with this campaign.
1457
01:05:38,031 --> 01:05:42,869
And as such, it is time to move
to your super PAC location,
1458
01:05:42,903 --> 01:05:46,039
which is all the way
at the back of the room,
1459
01:05:46,073 --> 01:05:50,043
far, far away from the activity
of the campaign.
1460
01:05:51,111 --> 01:05:52,779
Right now?
1461
01:05:52,813 --> 01:05:55,582
I am not at liberty to say.
1462
01:05:55,615 --> 01:05:58,952
The campaign cannot coordinate
with the super PAC.
1463
01:05:58,986 --> 01:06:00,587
So...
1464
01:06:00,620 --> 01:06:02,723
After the meeting.
1465
01:06:02,756 --> 01:06:04,725
♪ You always won ♪
1466
01:06:04,758 --> 01:06:07,060
♪ Every time
you placed a bet... ♪
1467
01:06:10,564 --> 01:06:11,999
Get me that fucking sat truck!
1468
01:06:12,032 --> 01:06:14,835
Get it now! They're gonna
out-communicate us!
1469
01:06:14,868 --> 01:06:17,604
Here, we have an unusual
cluster of single women.
1470
01:06:17,637 --> 01:06:18,772
They're all gonna get pamphlets
1471
01:06:18,805 --> 01:06:20,574
saying that the mayor
is gonna repeal
1472
01:06:20,607 --> 01:06:22,109
the health care payment
for birth control.
1473
01:06:22,142 --> 01:06:23,543
What's this?
1474
01:06:23,577 --> 01:06:25,912
It's eight SMAWs.
1475
01:06:25,946 --> 01:06:28,015
Stay-at-home middle-aged women.
1476
01:06:28,048 --> 01:06:30,584
- 29 to 54.
- 29?
1477
01:06:30,617 --> 01:06:32,152
That's middle-aged?
1478
01:06:32,185 --> 01:06:34,321
Yes. Yes, it is.
1479
01:06:34,354 --> 01:06:36,023
You got to do it
on the adjective.
1480
01:06:36,056 --> 01:06:37,824
Safe streets.
It's not safe streets.
1481
01:06:37,858 --> 01:06:39,860
- Everybody wants safe streets!
- Safe... No, no, no.
1482
01:06:39,893 --> 01:06:40,894
Okay, that's coming off
a little angry.
1483
01:06:40,927 --> 01:06:43,630
Did you finish
those donor calls?
1484
01:06:43,663 --> 01:06:45,032
Yeah, just about.
1485
01:06:45,065 --> 01:06:47,034
I just always had a notion
that farmers had a...
1486
01:06:47,067 --> 01:06:48,902
I'm sorry, are...
are you clicking your heels?
1487
01:06:48,935 --> 01:06:50,137
Are you Dorothy?
1488
01:06:50,170 --> 01:06:51,905
Is there no place like home?
1489
01:06:51,938 --> 01:06:54,141
♪ Turning on the charm ♪
1490
01:06:54,174 --> 01:06:57,110
- ♪ Long enough to get you by ♪
- ♪ Still the same... ♪
1491
01:06:57,144 --> 01:07:00,647
America's greatness
and God's grace...
1492
01:07:00,680 --> 01:07:04,017
I'd go to battle
for those two any day.
1493
01:07:04,051 --> 01:07:05,719
Paid for by Wisconsinites
1494
01:07:05,752 --> 01:07:07,087
for Religiously Based
Compassionate Empathy.
1495
01:07:11,958 --> 01:07:13,060
Did you just sigh?
1496
01:07:13,093 --> 01:07:14,694
- Did he just sigh?
- Oh, I can't...
1497
01:07:14,728 --> 01:07:15,996
Don't even get me started
with sighing.
1498
01:07:16,029 --> 01:07:18,065
Now, here, this cluster in blue
1499
01:07:18,098 --> 01:07:19,933
have children,
so they're gonna get
1500
01:07:19,966 --> 01:07:22,169
pamphlets saying
"save our schools"
1501
01:07:22,202 --> 01:07:25,705
because it's 1950
and everybody loves pamphlets.
1502
01:07:25,739 --> 01:07:27,140
"Hi. My name is Jack.
I'm exasperated."
1503
01:07:28,708 --> 01:07:30,811
Why don't we move on
to the WoMAMs?
1504
01:07:30,844 --> 01:07:32,612
White middle-aged men.
1505
01:07:35,849 --> 01:07:40,087
♪ I had nothing left to say ♪
1506
01:07:40,120 --> 01:07:42,089
♪ 'Cause you're
still the same ♪
1507
01:07:42,122 --> 01:07:43,824
♪ Still the same ♪
1508
01:07:43,857 --> 01:07:46,093
♪ Baby, baby, still the same ♪
1509
01:07:46,126 --> 01:07:47,661
What's this?
1510
01:07:47,694 --> 01:07:48,929
Walt.
1511
01:07:48,962 --> 01:07:50,197
♪ You're still the same... ♪
1512
01:07:50,230 --> 01:07:51,965
Is that an acronym?
1513
01:07:51,998 --> 01:07:54,601
No, it is not.
1514
01:07:56,136 --> 01:08:00,774
Can I still bring baked goods
to the super PAC location?
1515
01:08:08,081 --> 01:08:09,616
No.
1516
01:08:26,900 --> 01:08:30,804
I'm Colonel Jack Hastings,
and I approve this message.
1517
01:08:30,837 --> 01:08:32,272
You want to come to Deerlaken,
1518
01:08:32,305 --> 01:08:34,107
you'll have to go through him.
1519
01:08:36,843 --> 01:08:39,112
Paid for by Powerful
Progressives for Strength.
1520
01:08:42,849 --> 01:08:44,184
- Thank you so much, sir.
- You're welcome.
1521
01:08:44,217 --> 01:08:45,819
Thank you so much
for your support.
1522
01:08:45,852 --> 01:08:47,721
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
1523
01:08:49,956 --> 01:08:52,993
How the hell did she get the
bayou billionaires involved?
1524
01:08:53,026 --> 01:08:54,462
You okay?
Do you need some help?
1525
01:08:54,495 --> 01:08:56,196
- Just fine.
- You're good? Okay, thank you.
1526
01:08:56,229 --> 01:08:57,964
She must have promised
that they could have
1527
01:08:57,998 --> 01:08:59,833
the town smelted
after the election.
1528
01:09:04,871 --> 01:09:06,740
I'm just very impressed
with all this.
1529
01:09:06,773 --> 01:09:09,042
- You... you do the polling.
- Uh-huh. In fact...
1530
01:09:10,076 --> 01:09:11,845
There it is.
1531
01:09:11,878 --> 01:09:12,913
What is that?
1532
01:09:12,946 --> 01:09:14,814
No, who is that?
Elton Chambers.
1533
01:09:14,848 --> 01:09:16,917
The Rocket Man?
1534
01:09:16,950 --> 01:09:18,785
The billionaire
Rocket Man, yes.
1535
01:09:18,818 --> 01:09:20,921
Jesus Chr...
I thought he was dead.
1536
01:09:20,954 --> 01:09:22,856
- Well, he is dead.
- No, no, no.
1537
01:09:22,889 --> 01:09:24,958
A series of micro-strokes.
It's all good.
1538
01:09:43,210 --> 01:09:46,980
Sir Elton, thank you
so, so much for coming.
1539
01:09:47,013 --> 01:09:50,050
Everyone, this is
the great Sir Elton.
1540
01:09:51,552 --> 01:09:53,887
Let's get through
the pleasantries.
1541
01:09:53,920 --> 01:09:56,756
This is Jack Hastings
and his daughter Diana.
1542
01:09:56,790 --> 01:10:00,760
Hello to you.
1543
01:10:00,794 --> 01:10:03,096
All right, well,
let's get right to it, then.
1544
01:10:03,129 --> 01:10:08,268
Tell me, what is your position
1545
01:10:08,301 --> 01:10:11,871
concerning the settlement
1546
01:10:11,905 --> 01:10:17,010
of Kevyat Sharim?
1547
01:10:18,345 --> 01:10:20,347
Uh...
1548
01:10:20,380 --> 01:10:22,082
I'm not sure I...
1549
01:10:22,115 --> 01:10:23,183
Israel.
1550
01:10:23,216 --> 01:10:26,253
Jack believes
that sovereign nations
1551
01:10:26,286 --> 01:10:27,954
are entitled to self-defense.
1552
01:10:27,988 --> 01:10:29,122
Strongly?
1553
01:10:29,155 --> 01:10:30,357
Strongly believes, yes.
1554
01:10:37,397 --> 01:10:39,199
An election is a moral horror,
1555
01:10:39,232 --> 01:10:41,868
as bad as a battle
but without the blood.
1556
01:10:41,901 --> 01:10:44,104
That's George Bernard Shaw.
1557
01:10:45,606 --> 01:10:47,107
Get the car.
1558
01:10:47,140 --> 01:10:48,308
I think that went well.
1559
01:10:48,341 --> 01:10:50,110
Seemed like a really nice guy.
1560
01:10:50,143 --> 01:10:51,878
Actually looked
pretty good, right?
1561
01:10:51,911 --> 01:10:53,079
- Yeah.
- Surprisingly robust.
1562
01:10:53,113 --> 01:10:55,115
Elton Chambers is in.
1563
01:10:55,148 --> 01:10:57,250
- Oh.
- Ah. All right.
1564
01:10:57,284 --> 01:10:58,918
Making it rain.
1565
01:10:58,952 --> 01:11:01,788
He actually has a machine
that makes it rain.
1566
01:11:11,865 --> 01:11:14,834
This margin of error
is really shrinking.
1567
01:11:14,868 --> 01:11:15,969
Excuse me. Gary...
1568
01:11:16,002 --> 01:11:17,103
- Mr. Zimmer.
- Mm-mm.
1569
01:11:17,137 --> 01:11:19,440
- Becca, super PAC.
- Uh...
1570
01:11:19,473 --> 01:11:21,908
Okay.
1571
01:11:21,941 --> 01:11:23,843
- Uh, big guy?
- Hmm?
1572
01:11:23,877 --> 01:11:25,912
We got a problem.
1573
01:11:36,289 --> 01:11:38,224
Hey, everybody.
1574
01:11:38,258 --> 01:11:40,193
Hard at work, I see.
That's good.
1575
01:11:40,226 --> 01:11:42,395
That's good.
I had a couple of questions.
1576
01:11:42,430 --> 01:11:44,197
The first is: What the fuck?!
1577
01:11:44,230 --> 01:11:46,333
What tactical genius in here
1578
01:11:46,366 --> 01:11:48,636
thought it might be a good idea
to carpet-bomb
1579
01:11:48,669 --> 01:11:51,405
a particular neighborhood
in this town
1580
01:11:51,439 --> 01:11:55,208
with flyers suggesting
that Colonel Jack Hastings
1581
01:11:55,241 --> 01:11:56,976
- would make sure...
- Fuck.
1582
01:11:57,010 --> 01:12:00,380
- ...that contraception
is paid for by the government?
1583
01:12:04,184 --> 01:12:05,919
Uh, I did.
1584
01:12:05,952 --> 01:12:08,154
- Oh.
- The data showed an
1585
01:12:08,188 --> 01:12:10,223
unusually concentrated grouping
of single women in the area
1586
01:12:10,256 --> 01:12:12,292
who are deeply interested
in reproductive rights.
1587
01:12:12,325 --> 01:12:13,461
And you know why that is?
1588
01:12:13,494 --> 01:12:15,095
Well, "why" is not really...
1589
01:12:15,128 --> 01:12:17,030
Because this "concentrated
grouping of single women,"
1590
01:12:17,063 --> 01:12:19,065
as you put it, is a convent.
1591
01:12:20,133 --> 01:12:21,968
They are nuns.
1592
01:12:22,001 --> 01:12:25,038
Which is how many of them are
going to end up voting for us.
1593
01:12:25,071 --> 01:12:27,307
"Nuns" of them. Zero.
1594
01:12:27,340 --> 01:12:29,443
It's not funny.
1595
01:12:29,477 --> 01:12:31,878
I'm not laughing.
1596
01:12:34,080 --> 01:12:36,216
Fuck.
1597
01:12:36,249 --> 01:12:39,052
Well, I think we can
appreciate the humor
1598
01:12:39,085 --> 01:12:41,354
in this very honest mistake.
1599
01:12:41,388 --> 01:12:43,256
And the fact that the nuns
1600
01:12:43,289 --> 01:12:44,924
are generously turning
the other cheek
1601
01:12:44,958 --> 01:12:46,126
makes it a nonstory, but...
1602
01:12:46,159 --> 01:12:47,461
Brooke, Brooke, if I may.
1603
01:12:47,495 --> 01:12:49,497
Uh, this is really just
another perfect example
1604
01:12:49,530 --> 01:12:52,932
of the D.C. elite coming into
a place they don't understand
1605
01:12:52,966 --> 01:12:54,402
and trying to dictate
how we should live.
1606
01:12:54,435 --> 01:12:57,003
The Democrat Party can't win.
They're getting desperate.
1607
01:12:57,036 --> 01:12:59,072
They don't know us,
they don't want to know us,
1608
01:12:59,105 --> 01:13:01,107
- and they look down on our values.
- No, no.
1609
01:13:01,141 --> 01:13:03,009
That's "we." You're D.C. elite.
1610
01:13:03,042 --> 01:13:04,412
Oh, no, actually,
I'm from here.
1611
01:13:04,445 --> 01:13:06,079
Faith, I didn't know that.
1612
01:13:06,112 --> 01:13:08,148
- You're from Wisconsin?
- Mm-hmm. Yeah.
1613
01:13:08,181 --> 01:13:10,016
Well, no, "Deer-lake-en."
I'm from "Deer-lake-en."
1614
01:13:10,049 --> 01:13:11,519
- What? Whoa.
- Oh. Wow.
1615
01:13:11,552 --> 01:13:13,953
So this campaign has been
a bit of a homecoming.
1616
01:13:13,987 --> 01:13:15,423
- It really is, Brooke. Thank you.
- No, no.
1617
01:13:15,456 --> 01:13:17,357
No, no, that's a lie.
That's a lie.
1618
01:13:17,390 --> 01:13:19,025
- No, it's...
- You're lying.
1619
01:13:19,058 --> 01:13:20,126
- It's-it's the truth.
- She's ly... That's...
1620
01:13:20,160 --> 01:13:21,729
- I'm from here.
- No, that... What are you even doing?
1621
01:13:21,762 --> 01:13:22,763
- Okay.
- I-I am from here.
1622
01:13:22,797 --> 01:13:23,764
- You're not from here!
- Well, as always, a great
1623
01:13:23,798 --> 01:13:24,931
- and spirited discussion.
- Thank you so much.
1624
01:13:24,964 --> 01:13:27,333
- No, hey! No, no, no, no. She's lying.
- Thank you both.
1625
01:13:27,367 --> 01:13:28,469
- Unfortunately, we have to leave it there.
- She' a li...
1626
01:13:28,502 --> 01:13:31,304
Coming up, we'll look at more
of this year's hot races
1627
01:13:31,337 --> 01:13:34,174
and how those will affect races
four years from now.
1628
01:13:34,207 --> 01:13:36,242
Why do you even lie
about something like that?
1629
01:13:36,276 --> 01:13:39,547
Honestly, I, uh...
I don't even know.
1630
01:13:39,580 --> 01:13:41,381
"I... I don't even know."
1631
01:13:41,415 --> 01:13:43,249
Wh-What do you mean,
you don't know?
1632
01:13:43,283 --> 01:13:46,319
You can't just lie
about something like that.
1633
01:13:46,352 --> 01:13:48,456
You just walk away?
1634
01:13:48,489 --> 01:13:52,091
You just told America that
you're from "Deer-lake-en"?
1635
01:13:52,125 --> 01:13:54,562
That's not even
how you pronounce it!
1636
01:13:54,595 --> 01:13:58,031
"Deer-lake-en," my ass.
1637
01:13:58,064 --> 01:14:00,133
Oh, my God.
1638
01:14:00,166 --> 01:14:02,536
She's a fucking genius!
1639
01:14:02,570 --> 01:14:04,370
Oh!
1640
01:14:04,405 --> 01:14:06,574
Oh, my God, I hate her so much.
1641
01:14:06,607 --> 01:14:08,308
I hate her. I hate her.
1642
01:14:08,341 --> 01:14:11,077
She said it,
and now it's the truth.
1643
01:14:11,110 --> 01:14:14,080
Fuck me.
1644
01:14:15,449 --> 01:14:17,083
Another round, guys?
1645
01:14:17,116 --> 01:14:18,419
Okay.
1646
01:14:20,253 --> 01:14:22,456
Goddamn it.
You're killing me.
1647
01:14:22,490 --> 01:14:24,090
That's good. Yeah.
1648
01:14:26,359 --> 01:14:28,061
Come on.
Let's get out of here.
1649
01:14:28,094 --> 01:14:29,195
Hey, Mikes!
1650
01:14:29,229 --> 01:14:31,264
How you doing, guys?
1651
01:14:34,200 --> 01:14:35,436
Hello, everybody.
1652
01:14:35,469 --> 01:14:37,505
- Hey, big guy.
- Hey, Gary. Um...
1653
01:14:37,538 --> 01:14:40,106
- Burger and a Bud.
- Oh, thank you very much.
1654
01:14:40,139 --> 01:14:42,108
You know, that looks great.
Uh, can I have one of those?
1655
01:14:42,141 --> 01:14:43,376
No.
1656
01:14:43,410 --> 01:14:45,513
What you guys doing?
Looking at some ads?
1657
01:14:45,546 --> 01:14:47,347
Yeah, they're just
taking me through it.
1658
01:14:47,380 --> 01:14:49,282
Bio. Very nice.
1659
01:14:49,315 --> 01:14:51,384
Education. That's important.
1660
01:14:51,418 --> 01:14:54,053
Hey, are we sure that we want
to be doing this here
1661
01:14:54,087 --> 01:14:56,122
and not in Faith's room
or the mayor's office?
1662
01:14:56,155 --> 01:14:59,225
Because right now I'm not sure
that our opposition knows
1663
01:14:59,259 --> 01:15:01,127
exactly what we're about to do.
1664
01:15:01,160 --> 01:15:02,830
And that seems unfair.
No, no, no, no, no.
1665
01:15:02,863 --> 01:15:04,397
Don't put 'em away
on my account.
1666
01:15:04,431 --> 01:15:06,634
Why don't we got one of
those overhead projectors
1667
01:15:06,667 --> 01:15:07,968
- that you have at a bowling alley?
- Stop.
1668
01:15:08,002 --> 01:15:10,136
- Kurt, you don't have to leave.
- So everybody here can see it.
1669
01:15:10,169 --> 01:15:11,170
Wouldn't that be good?
1670
01:15:11,204 --> 01:15:12,372
Kurt, come on.
1671
01:15:14,240 --> 01:15:15,341
Mmm!
1672
01:15:15,375 --> 01:15:17,076
Why do you talk
to them like that?
1673
01:15:17,110 --> 01:15:18,144
Like what?
1674
01:15:18,177 --> 01:15:19,312
Like that.
Like they're idiots.
1675
01:15:19,345 --> 01:15:21,180
Well...
1676
01:15:22,282 --> 01:15:24,284
Listen.
1677
01:15:25,553 --> 01:15:27,454
I saw some polls.
1678
01:15:27,488 --> 01:15:29,222
If we don't
figure this out soon,
1679
01:15:29,255 --> 01:15:30,658
there's no way
we're gonna beat her.
1680
01:15:30,691 --> 01:15:33,427
- Our demographics are so...
- "Her"?
1681
01:15:33,460 --> 01:15:36,430
- Who?
- Her.
1682
01:15:36,463 --> 01:15:39,098
I mean, you said,
if we don't figure it out soon,
1683
01:15:39,132 --> 01:15:40,601
we're not gonna be able
to beat her.
1684
01:15:40,634 --> 01:15:42,570
We're not gonna beat
her candidate, Braun.
1685
01:15:42,603 --> 01:15:44,237
Mayor Braun.
1686
01:15:44,270 --> 01:15:46,440
Herr... Herr Braun.
1687
01:15:46,473 --> 01:15:48,141
Herr, her. Same thing.
1688
01:15:48,174 --> 01:15:49,410
Mm-hmm.
1689
01:15:49,443 --> 01:15:52,178
Look, Gary, I don't, um,
really understand
1690
01:15:52,211 --> 01:15:53,614
how you guys do things in D.C.,
1691
01:15:53,647 --> 01:15:55,416
but if you're gonna work
for my father,
1692
01:15:55,449 --> 01:15:56,717
you need to treat people
with respect.
1693
01:15:56,750 --> 01:15:58,586
- With. With.
- What?
1694
01:15:58,619 --> 01:16:00,454
Work with your father, not for.
1695
01:16:00,487 --> 01:16:03,289
You said "for."
It's a semantic thing, but...
1696
01:16:03,323 --> 01:16:06,225
it's... you know,
it's an important distinction.
1697
01:16:10,296 --> 01:16:12,499
Just so you know,
1698
01:16:12,533 --> 01:16:14,602
they don't actually serve
hamburgers and Budweiser here,
1699
01:16:14,635 --> 01:16:16,604
'cause it's a hofbrau house,
so they would serve
1700
01:16:16,637 --> 01:16:18,304
German food and German beers.
1701
01:16:18,338 --> 01:16:19,640
They've been patronizing you.
1702
01:16:25,946 --> 01:16:29,416
Just so you know, I don't even
like hamburgers or Budweiser,
1703
01:16:29,450 --> 01:16:30,918
so I've been
patronizing them...
1704
01:16:30,951 --> 01:16:32,486
- the whole time.
- Okay. Ah.
1705
01:16:32,519 --> 01:16:33,721
Did a little switcheroo.
1706
01:16:33,754 --> 01:16:36,624
Oh, and just so you know,
congratulations.
1707
01:16:36,657 --> 01:16:39,125
Our campaign made the paper.
1708
01:16:41,428 --> 01:16:42,596
Oh, God.
1709
01:16:49,737 --> 01:16:51,772
She's so pretty.
1710
01:16:51,805 --> 01:16:54,475
I bet she smells
like Pop-Tarts.
1711
01:16:58,812 --> 01:17:01,381
Is he still looking?
1712
01:17:01,415 --> 01:17:02,683
Now, Colonel Jack Hastings.
1713
01:17:02,716 --> 01:17:04,451
- Mm-hmm. Absolutely.
- Military man.
1714
01:17:04,485 --> 01:17:06,386
- From the heartland.
- Yep.
1715
01:17:06,420 --> 01:17:07,688
No greater place in America.
1716
01:17:07,721 --> 01:17:09,322
- No, no.
- Am I right?
1717
01:17:09,355 --> 01:17:12,426
- Nope.
- He is now part of the loony left.
1718
01:17:12,459 --> 01:17:15,294
No, not just the loony left.
He's not just a Democrat.
1719
01:17:15,328 --> 01:17:16,797
- No.
- He has joined the...
1720
01:17:16,830 --> 01:17:18,732
- Squad.
- Socialism. - Mm-hmm.
1721
01:17:18,766 --> 01:17:20,401
Socialism. Hmm.
1722
01:17:20,434 --> 01:17:22,469
Do you think
it hurts our military
1723
01:17:22,503 --> 01:17:25,773
to have one of their own
throw in with the Democrats?
1724
01:17:27,441 --> 01:17:30,544
I know that if I had served,
1725
01:17:30,577 --> 01:17:32,613
I wouldn't like it.
1726
01:17:32,646 --> 01:17:35,616
Mm. Yeah.
1727
01:17:35,649 --> 01:17:39,352
Wow, that was a harsh segment.
1728
01:17:39,385 --> 01:17:41,354
Cutting but fair.
1729
01:17:41,387 --> 01:17:44,323
It's like I wrote it myself
last night and sent it to them
1730
01:17:44,357 --> 01:17:47,226
and they read it verbatim
like a scene.
1731
01:17:47,260 --> 01:17:49,328
Go to bed.
1732
01:17:49,362 --> 01:17:50,497
What is this?
1733
01:17:50,531 --> 01:17:51,565
What am I looking at?
1734
01:17:51,598 --> 01:17:53,000
Those are the...
1735
01:17:53,033 --> 01:17:54,768
Why are we being outspent
three-to-one?
1736
01:17:54,802 --> 01:17:56,437
And how do white women
not realize
1737
01:17:56,470 --> 01:17:57,705
they're backing
the wrong horse?
1738
01:17:57,738 --> 01:17:59,272
These numbers
aren't solidified.
1739
01:17:59,305 --> 01:18:00,708
Yeah, well, you got to
make it happen,
1740
01:18:00,741 --> 01:18:03,744
or you got to find me
some more fucking Hispanics.
1741
01:18:03,777 --> 01:18:05,713
Where are my
fucking Hispanics?!
1742
01:18:05,746 --> 01:18:09,650
I need some more fucking Hispanics, Kurt!
1743
01:18:16,724 --> 01:18:18,726
Hey, everybody.
1744
01:18:18,759 --> 01:18:20,461
Listen.
1745
01:18:20,494 --> 01:18:22,328
I am profoundly disappointed
1746
01:18:22,361 --> 01:18:24,865
in the comments
that I just made.
1747
01:18:24,898 --> 01:18:28,469
My words and/or actions
1748
01:18:28,502 --> 01:18:31,739
do not represent
who I am as a person and...
1749
01:18:31,772 --> 01:18:33,841
- Teachable moment.
- It is a teachable moment.
1750
01:18:33,874 --> 01:18:37,310
It's something I think
we can all learn from.
1751
01:18:37,343 --> 01:18:38,512
And in that way, I feel like
1752
01:18:38,545 --> 01:18:39,680
I have given you a gift.
1753
01:18:39,713 --> 01:18:42,049
- You have my heart.
- And from this moment on,
1754
01:18:42,082 --> 01:18:43,617
I vow to make this office
1755
01:18:43,650 --> 01:18:47,788
a color- and gender-neutral
work environment.
1756
01:18:47,821 --> 01:18:50,057
That is my...
1757
01:18:50,090 --> 01:18:52,459
Are you gonna get that?
1758
01:18:52,493 --> 01:18:54,595
Ringing off the fucking hook.
1759
01:18:54,628 --> 01:18:56,329
A hundred percent.
1760
01:18:56,362 --> 01:18:57,631
What do you mean, you're sure?
1761
01:18:57,664 --> 01:18:59,365
I'm sure.
1762
01:18:59,398 --> 01:19:01,367
You're sure,
or you're just pretty sure?
1763
01:19:01,401 --> 01:19:02,770
- 100% sure.
- Okay.
1764
01:19:02,803 --> 01:19:06,339
Okay, Tina. Better not be
another nun situation.
1765
01:19:06,372 --> 01:19:07,808
It's not.
1766
01:19:07,841 --> 01:19:09,743
Hey. Is your dad here?
1767
01:19:09,777 --> 01:19:11,411
Yeah. Dad!
1768
01:19:11,445 --> 01:19:13,781
- Yeah?
- Come on in, Colonel.
1769
01:19:17,484 --> 01:19:20,687
So, um, we can't win.
1770
01:19:23,423 --> 01:19:27,661
The people in this town
are pretty set in their ways.
1771
01:19:27,694 --> 01:19:29,530
And we lost the eight nuns.
1772
01:19:29,563 --> 01:19:30,697
That wasn't good.
1773
01:19:30,731 --> 01:19:33,801
So, we can't win.
1774
01:19:35,469 --> 01:19:39,540
Uh... y-you know,
we appreciate all you done.
1775
01:19:39,573 --> 01:19:42,676
I mean, the campaign and, uh...
1776
01:19:42,709 --> 01:19:45,846
I'm just sorry
we let you down, but...
1777
01:19:45,879 --> 01:19:49,550
well, all I can say
is thank you.
1778
01:19:49,583 --> 01:19:51,819
Really, Gary,
thank you for everything.
1779
01:19:51,852 --> 01:19:53,420
It was a hell of a ride.
1780
01:19:53,453 --> 01:19:56,423
Are you shitting me?
1781
01:19:56,456 --> 01:19:58,659
All I have to say is
we can't win,
1782
01:19:58,692 --> 01:20:00,861
and you're-you're through,
you're out.
1783
01:20:00,894 --> 01:20:02,729
- You said we can't win.
- Unless.
1784
01:20:02,763 --> 01:20:04,832
We can't win unless...
1785
01:20:04,865 --> 01:20:06,567
You didn't let me finish.
1786
01:20:06,600 --> 01:20:10,137
We can't win unless
it turns out that this town
1787
01:20:10,170 --> 01:20:12,739
isn't the Mayberry
everybody thinks it is.
1788
01:20:12,773 --> 01:20:14,575
I just got a little piece
of intel
1789
01:20:14,608 --> 01:20:15,976
that's kind of intriguing.
1790
01:20:16,009 --> 01:20:20,614
So, the mayor's brother Ziggy,
he had an Oxy problem.
1791
01:20:20,647 --> 01:20:23,750
Well, he was a roofer
and got hurt on the job.
1792
01:20:23,784 --> 01:20:25,586
Yes, well,
what you might not know
1793
01:20:25,619 --> 01:20:28,689
is that the mayor
pulled some strings,
1794
01:20:28,722 --> 01:20:31,658
kept him out of jail,
got him into rehab.
1795
01:20:31,692 --> 01:20:33,527
That is abuse of power,
nepotism.
1796
01:20:33,560 --> 01:20:35,796
- Probably some clerical shit in there.
- Come on.
1797
01:20:35,829 --> 01:20:37,564
Gary.
1798
01:20:37,598 --> 01:20:39,433
But we're the good guys, right?
1799
01:20:39,466 --> 01:20:41,635
Yeah, we're the good guys.
1800
01:20:41,668 --> 01:20:43,871
When they go low...
1801
01:20:43,904 --> 01:20:45,706
We go high.
1802
01:20:45,739 --> 01:20:48,475
Unless we also need to go low,
apparently.
1803
01:20:48,508 --> 01:20:51,178
Only to keep those who
would go lower out of power.
1804
01:20:51,211 --> 01:20:53,680
So, when they go low,
we go higher,
1805
01:20:53,714 --> 01:20:55,782
incrementally, in relation
to how low they went.
1806
01:20:55,816 --> 01:20:57,851
Regrettably, yes.
1807
01:20:57,885 --> 01:21:00,454
When they go low,
we go almost as low,
1808
01:21:00,487 --> 01:21:01,855
but we feel worse doing it.
1809
01:21:01,889 --> 01:21:03,690
You think they thought twice
about making your dad
1810
01:21:03,724 --> 01:21:05,926
look like a PTS nutcase?
1811
01:21:05,959 --> 01:21:07,628
And I'm going low because
1812
01:21:07,661 --> 01:21:09,463
I'm gonna tell the truth
about the mayor?
1813
01:21:09,496 --> 01:21:11,498
His brother's fragile, Gary.
1814
01:21:11,531 --> 01:21:12,766
This town is fragile.
1815
01:21:12,799 --> 01:21:14,968
The whole area is fragile.
Our democracy.
1816
01:21:15,002 --> 01:21:17,871
Stop.
We're not doing it.
1817
01:21:17,905 --> 01:21:20,507
Okay?
People are gonna get hurt.
1818
01:21:20,540 --> 01:21:22,042
I'm sorry... I really am...
1819
01:21:22,075 --> 01:21:25,512
but sometimes good people
have to do shitty things
1820
01:21:25,545 --> 01:21:27,681
in service of the greater good.
1821
01:21:27,714 --> 01:21:29,549
Isn't that right, Colonel?
1822
01:21:35,856 --> 01:21:37,824
Hey.
1823
01:21:41,561 --> 01:21:42,663
Hey.
1824
01:21:42,696 --> 01:21:44,531
Yeah?
1825
01:21:44,564 --> 01:21:46,600
Gary, stop.
1826
01:21:47,834 --> 01:21:49,803
What?
1827
01:21:49,836 --> 01:21:52,472
Is this politics?
1828
01:21:52,506 --> 01:21:54,675
It's not politics anymore,
Diana.
1829
01:21:54,708 --> 01:21:56,677
It's... it's math.
1830
01:21:56,710 --> 01:21:57,945
That's what an election is.
1831
01:21:57,978 --> 01:21:59,546
It's just math.
1832
01:21:59,579 --> 01:22:01,949
We need what they get plus one.
1833
01:22:01,982 --> 01:22:03,817
That's all.
1834
01:22:03,850 --> 01:22:05,752
And if I can't get that
1835
01:22:05,786 --> 01:22:07,854
by getting more people
to vote for your dad,
1836
01:22:07,888 --> 01:22:11,692
then I have to get fewer people
to vote for Braun.
1837
01:22:37,084 --> 01:22:39,086
Hi.
1838
01:22:40,687 --> 01:22:42,990
- Come on in.
- Thank you.
1839
01:22:43,023 --> 01:22:44,825
I'm so sorry.
1840
01:22:47,828 --> 01:22:50,864
I... I'm pulling the plug.
1841
01:22:50,897 --> 01:22:53,533
- Hey, hey.
- I mean, we have the money we need.
1842
01:22:53,567 --> 01:22:55,068
We have more than
we would need.
1843
01:22:55,102 --> 01:22:58,071
And this would...
destroy your brother.
1844
01:22:59,573 --> 01:23:02,709
- And I'm just so sorry.
- Hey.
1845
01:23:03,944 --> 01:23:07,080
You have nothing
to be sorry for.
1846
01:23:08,148 --> 01:23:10,984
You saved us, Diana.
1847
01:23:11,018 --> 01:23:13,887
- Mm-hmm.
- This place was done.
1848
01:23:13,920 --> 01:23:17,557
Just another town in the middle
of nowhere, going nowhere.
1849
01:23:17,591 --> 01:23:21,695
And everyone agreed...
yours was the best idea we had.
1850
01:23:21,728 --> 01:23:24,564
Unless you want to go back
to the two Mikes' idea of...
1851
01:23:24,598 --> 01:23:26,800
ostrich meat farms.
1852
01:23:28,035 --> 01:23:30,737
Diana, you moving back here,
1853
01:23:30,771 --> 01:23:32,706
caring so much...
1854
01:23:32,739 --> 01:23:35,042
I mean, this whole thing...
1855
01:23:36,777 --> 01:23:41,048
Well, I just know
how proud of you your dad is
1856
01:23:41,081 --> 01:23:43,583
and how proud
your mom would be.
1857
01:23:45,619 --> 01:23:49,923
And how grateful
every single one of us are
1858
01:23:49,956 --> 01:23:52,826
for what you've done
and everything you've given.
1859
01:23:54,661 --> 01:23:56,663
It's working.
1860
01:24:01,768 --> 01:24:03,770
Okay.
1861
01:24:07,908 --> 01:24:10,043
What do we do about Gary?
1862
01:24:11,078 --> 01:24:14,147
Whatever Gary thinks he's got,
1863
01:24:14,181 --> 01:24:16,750
why don't we just give him
something better?
1864
01:24:40,774 --> 01:24:42,075
Hmm.
1865
01:24:42,109 --> 01:24:43,376
No, forget the rehab thing.
1866
01:24:43,411 --> 01:24:46,146
This is bigger. Obviously, you
can't use my name, so just...
1867
01:24:46,179 --> 01:24:48,416
"Senior official
with inside knowledge
1868
01:24:48,449 --> 01:24:49,983
of campaign strategy."
1869
01:24:50,016 --> 01:24:51,718
Yes, you are welcome.
1870
01:24:51,751 --> 01:24:52,886
Tell me they're running it.
1871
01:24:52,919 --> 01:24:54,254
- They are running it.
- Oh, yeah, baby!
1872
01:24:54,287 --> 01:24:56,189
- Shit's gonna hit the fan.
- Oh, it feels good.
1873
01:24:56,223 --> 01:24:58,191
Now, the word of the day
is "disappointed."
1874
01:24:58,225 --> 01:25:00,861
We are not mad at the mayor.
We are not shocked.
1875
01:25:00,894 --> 01:25:02,863
- We're just disappointed.
- Yeah, I am disappointed.
1876
01:25:02,896 --> 01:25:04,798
- I'm disappointed, too.
- I mean, it's disappointing.
1877
01:25:04,831 --> 01:25:06,900
- It is. You know what, he's the mayor.
- He betrayed us.
1878
01:25:06,933 --> 01:25:08,668
He betrayed us,
and it's disappointing.
1879
01:25:08,702 --> 01:25:10,070
- I'm hurt.
- But I'm not mad.
1880
01:25:10,103 --> 01:25:12,139
- No, I'm just disappointed.
- Me, too.
1881
01:25:12,172 --> 01:25:13,807
Tonight, we have this picture
1882
01:25:13,840 --> 01:25:15,175
of the alleged
ten-year-old love child
1883
01:25:15,208 --> 01:25:17,744
of the Wisconsin mayor
and the girl's mother.
1884
01:25:17,777 --> 01:25:20,046
We've obscured the child's face
to protect her identity
1885
01:25:20,080 --> 01:25:21,248
but left enough clues
1886
01:25:21,281 --> 01:25:23,750
so that you can probably
figure it out.
1887
01:25:23,783 --> 01:25:25,752
To discuss this
important, late-breaking story,
1888
01:25:25,785 --> 01:25:27,687
we go to our panel
with a feature
1889
01:25:27,721 --> 01:25:31,825
you'll only see here on CNN:
the Duodecabox.
1890
01:25:31,858 --> 01:25:34,895
What do you think,
Phil, Diane, Liz, Carl,
1891
01:25:34,928 --> 01:25:37,063
Barbara and... let's say Craig?
1892
01:25:47,040 --> 01:25:48,909
Kaylee?
1893
01:25:48,942 --> 01:25:50,177
- Kaylee.
- Y-Yeah.
1894
01:25:50,210 --> 01:25:52,045
- Can you clean this up, please?
- Oh, sure.
1895
01:25:52,078 --> 01:25:54,214
It was an accident
with the sandwich. Thank you.
1896
01:26:18,305 --> 01:26:19,973
Hey, man.
1897
01:26:20,006 --> 01:26:21,975
Can I talk to you
about white power?
1898
01:26:25,145 --> 01:26:26,813
Yeah, guns save lives.
1899
01:26:26,846 --> 01:26:28,114
- Thank you, sir.
- Thank you.
1900
01:26:37,090 --> 01:26:38,792
It has been
a hard-fought campaign,
1901
01:26:38,825 --> 01:26:40,927
but now it's in the hands
of the voters.
1902
01:26:40,961 --> 01:26:43,163
And excuse me... there's
the Colonel right there.
1903
01:26:43,196 --> 01:26:44,364
Colonel, come on in.
1904
01:26:44,397 --> 01:26:45,832
- Diana.
- Hi. - Hi. Good morning.
1905
01:26:45,865 --> 01:26:46,900
Did you get some rest?
1906
01:26:46,933 --> 01:26:48,235
Yeah, we got a little bit.
1907
01:26:48,268 --> 01:26:49,970
- Excuse us, folks.
- Good morning. Good morning.
1908
01:26:50,003 --> 01:26:52,105
Excuse us. Excuse us.
1909
01:26:52,138 --> 01:26:53,541
There he is.
1910
01:26:53,574 --> 01:26:55,075
- Billy. Hey.
- Colonel, good to see you, sir.
1911
01:26:55,108 --> 01:26:56,810
- How are you? How are you?
- Good to see you.
1912
01:26:56,843 --> 01:26:57,911
How about a picture?
1913
01:26:57,944 --> 01:26:59,246
All righty.
1914
01:26:59,279 --> 01:27:00,780
Come on. Come on.
1915
01:27:00,814 --> 01:27:01,982
- Let's go. Let's go.
- Thank you.
1916
01:27:02,015 --> 01:27:03,883
Oh, make sure you get
this guy's I.D.
1917
01:27:03,917 --> 01:27:05,218
Okay.
1918
01:27:05,252 --> 01:27:06,987
Billy, we're just talking
to Fox. Just Fox.
1919
01:27:07,020 --> 01:27:09,789
- Hello. Good morning.
- Good morning, Jack.
1920
01:27:09,823 --> 01:27:11,858
- Sign right there.
- Yeah. All right.
1921
01:27:11,891 --> 01:27:13,193
Your dad is really something.
1922
01:27:13,226 --> 01:27:14,861
- Yeah.
- He's done a great job.
1923
01:27:14,894 --> 01:27:16,096
- Yeah, yeah.
- Go over here?
1924
01:27:16,129 --> 01:27:17,864
So have you.
Thank you for everything.
1925
01:27:17,897 --> 01:27:19,032
- It's been...
- My pleasure.
1926
01:27:19,065 --> 01:27:20,300
- So...
- I was thinking, maybe later,
1927
01:27:20,333 --> 01:27:22,235
if you want to watch
the returns come in?
1928
01:27:22,269 --> 01:27:24,371
Yeah.
Oh, yeah, yeah, I'd love to.
1929
01:27:26,006 --> 01:27:28,174
Oh. Oh, shoot.
1930
01:27:28,208 --> 01:27:30,377
You know what? I have to
head back to the farm,
1931
01:27:30,411 --> 01:27:32,045
- but I'll see you later, okay?
- Okay.
1932
01:27:32,078 --> 01:27:33,880
Okay.
1933
01:27:33,913 --> 01:27:35,982
Diana, aren't you gonna vote?
1934
01:27:42,989 --> 01:27:44,324
Nothing?
1935
01:27:44,357 --> 01:27:46,393
- No early returns?
- Nothing.
1936
01:27:46,427 --> 01:27:48,895
- What about exit polling?
- No exit polling.
1937
01:27:48,928 --> 01:27:50,230
Well, is there
another precinct?
1938
01:27:50,263 --> 01:27:51,331
No.
1939
01:27:51,364 --> 01:27:52,932
Well, where else can they vote?
1940
01:27:52,966 --> 01:27:54,167
Well, they can't vote
anywhere else.
1941
01:27:54,200 --> 01:27:55,603
Was it all early voting?
1942
01:27:55,636 --> 01:27:57,405
No early voting, no.
Nothing.
1943
01:27:57,438 --> 01:27:59,306
What do you mean,
nobody has voted yet?
1944
01:27:59,339 --> 01:28:00,907
Uh, big guy.
1945
01:28:00,940 --> 01:28:02,142
You're gonna want to see this.
1946
01:28:02,175 --> 01:28:03,343
...smear Mayor Braun
with the falsehood
1947
01:28:03,376 --> 01:28:04,978
of an illegitimate child.
1948
01:28:05,011 --> 01:28:07,047
Which, as the report
you just read stated,
1949
01:28:07,080 --> 01:28:09,149
is actually the man's
dear niece.
1950
01:28:09,182 --> 01:28:11,318
Has the Hastings campaign
apologized?
1951
01:28:11,351 --> 01:28:13,353
Uh, no, they haven't,
and it-it's too late for that.
1952
01:28:13,386 --> 01:28:15,188
- Oh, fuck!
- Mayor Braun continues to
1953
01:28:15,221 --> 01:28:16,923
focus on the issues.
1954
01:28:16,956 --> 01:28:18,191
And quite frankly, Brooke,
1955
01:28:18,224 --> 01:28:20,193
the media owes the mayor
an apology, as well,
1956
01:28:20,226 --> 01:28:22,630
for credulously covering
a poorly sourced story.
1957
01:28:22,663 --> 01:28:24,364
Faith! Congratulations.
Well done.
1958
01:28:24,397 --> 01:28:26,366
- What the fuck are you doing?
- A new low.
1959
01:28:26,399 --> 01:28:28,168
Oh, yeah, like I leaked
a cocked-up story
1960
01:28:28,201 --> 01:28:29,936
about a bastard child
who happens to be
1961
01:28:29,969 --> 01:28:31,204
the man's fucking niece.
1962
01:28:31,237 --> 01:28:32,473
- Please, Gary.
- You fed me that bullshit.
1963
01:28:32,506 --> 01:28:33,973
You know, go fuck yourself.
1964
01:28:34,007 --> 01:28:35,241
- You go fuck yourself.
- You go fuck your...
1965
01:28:35,275 --> 01:28:36,343
Okay, you two.
1966
01:28:36,376 --> 01:28:38,211
Unfortunately, we're gonna
have to leave it there.
1967
01:28:38,244 --> 01:28:39,879
Thank you so much, Brooke.
1968
01:28:39,913 --> 01:28:41,047
- Thank you so much.
- Thanks, Brooke.
1969
01:28:41,081 --> 01:28:42,115
- Thank you.
- We're clear.
1970
01:28:42,148 --> 01:28:44,250
Why would I leak this? Huh?
1971
01:28:44,284 --> 01:28:46,086
Oh, to just make me
take the bait.
1972
01:28:46,119 --> 01:28:47,455
You didn't just want to win.
1973
01:28:47,488 --> 01:28:49,356
You wanted to castrate me,
didn't you?
1974
01:28:49,389 --> 01:28:51,091
If I wanted to cut
your dick off,
1975
01:28:51,124 --> 01:28:52,493
I would have done it
in front of you
1976
01:28:52,526 --> 01:28:55,362
just to see the last look
of horror in your eyes.
1977
01:28:56,396 --> 01:28:58,064
You're telling the truth.
1978
01:28:58,098 --> 01:28:59,500
No shit.
1979
01:28:59,533 --> 01:29:01,368
What the fuck is going on here?
1980
01:29:01,402 --> 01:29:02,969
Evan?
1981
01:29:03,002 --> 01:29:04,204
What...
1982
01:29:04,237 --> 01:29:05,305
Evan.
1983
01:29:05,338 --> 01:29:06,239
Evan, oh, my God.
1984
01:29:06,272 --> 01:29:07,974
- What's up, Becca?
- How the hell are you?
1985
01:29:08,007 --> 01:29:09,342
- Hiya. Nice to see you.
- Good to see you.
1986
01:29:09,376 --> 01:29:11,378
- How's everything?
- Yeah, I mean, it's going.
1987
01:29:11,412 --> 01:29:13,414
What the hell?
1988
01:29:13,447 --> 01:29:15,382
How the hell does he know her?
1989
01:29:15,416 --> 01:29:17,117
Is he from here?
1990
01:29:17,150 --> 01:29:20,153
Gary, look at his shoes.
I mean, really.
1991
01:29:20,186 --> 01:29:22,188
And we have Alan to thank
for bringing this man
1992
01:29:22,222 --> 01:29:23,457
- to our attention.
- It's Evan.
1993
01:29:23,491 --> 01:29:25,091
Did I happen to mention that...
1994
01:29:25,125 --> 01:29:27,293
Holy shit.
1995
01:29:27,327 --> 01:29:29,697
- What? What?
- Come on!
1996
01:29:29,730 --> 01:29:34,167
So, with 100%
of the vote counted,
1997
01:29:34,200 --> 01:29:37,505
the mayoral race is tied.
1998
01:29:37,538 --> 01:29:39,939
One vote to one vote.
1999
01:29:41,307 --> 01:29:42,543
No.
2000
01:29:42,576 --> 01:29:45,111
Okay, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
2001
01:29:45,145 --> 01:29:47,313
Wait, wait, wait.
Hold on, hold on, hold on.
2002
01:29:47,347 --> 01:29:49,215
Hold on. I, uh...
2003
01:29:49,249 --> 01:29:51,452
I don't...
I don't know exactly
2004
01:29:51,485 --> 01:29:54,455
what's going on here,
but it's weird.
2005
01:29:54,488 --> 01:29:56,122
Could somebody please
explain to me
2006
01:29:56,156 --> 01:29:57,725
- what's happening?
- Well, we had an election.
2007
01:29:57,758 --> 01:30:00,093
- Yes, I know that.
- And we gave it our best.
2008
01:30:00,126 --> 01:30:01,227
Just didn't work out.
2009
01:30:01,261 --> 01:30:02,563
Didn't work out, Jack?
Come on.
2010
01:30:02,596 --> 01:30:05,031
Do you know how much money
we invested in this?
2011
01:30:05,064 --> 01:30:06,966
Yeah, if the news media
is to be believed,
2012
01:30:07,000 --> 01:30:10,738
more than $45 million was
raised between the two of you.
2013
01:30:19,045 --> 01:30:22,115
Oh, shit.
2014
01:30:22,148 --> 01:30:24,117
Did you sucker me, Jack?
2015
01:30:24,150 --> 01:30:26,186
I guess.
2016
01:30:26,219 --> 01:30:28,188
You know what? Folks, sorry,
2017
01:30:28,221 --> 01:30:29,457
but I'm getting
all that money back.
2018
01:30:29,490 --> 01:30:30,491
From where?
2019
01:30:30,524 --> 01:30:33,092
We put millions
into those PACs.
2020
01:30:33,126 --> 01:30:35,028
Well, campaign finance law says
2021
01:30:35,061 --> 01:30:37,197
that money needn't be
accounted for.
2022
01:30:37,230 --> 01:30:39,299
Oh, my God.
2023
01:30:39,332 --> 01:30:41,334
I got to give it to this place.
2024
01:30:42,368 --> 01:30:44,370
Hey, Alan.
2025
01:30:44,405 --> 01:30:45,539
Uh, it's Evan.
2026
01:30:45,573 --> 01:30:47,040
Shit weasel.
2027
01:30:47,073 --> 01:30:48,776
You're from this town,
aren't you?
2028
01:30:48,809 --> 01:30:50,578
- Yeah.
- You set this whole thing up.
2029
01:30:50,611 --> 01:30:52,312
You set me up, huh?
2030
01:30:52,345 --> 01:30:55,181
You are so fired,
and you're going to jail!
2031
01:30:55,215 --> 01:30:56,349
Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
2032
01:30:56,382 --> 01:30:58,151
It was me. I did it.
2033
01:30:58,184 --> 01:30:59,453
You?
2034
01:31:00,588 --> 01:31:02,255
Wh...
2035
01:31:02,288 --> 01:31:03,491
Why?
2036
01:31:03,524 --> 01:31:05,559
You know...
2037
01:31:05,593 --> 01:31:08,529
it was just
this weird idea I had
2038
01:31:08,562 --> 01:31:10,498
'cause the town needed money.
2039
01:31:10,531 --> 01:31:13,066
So you...
2040
01:31:13,099 --> 01:31:14,401
Uh, shot the video,
2041
01:31:14,435 --> 01:31:17,505
and then had Evan
show it to you.
2042
01:31:17,538 --> 01:31:18,572
Uh, I...
2043
01:31:18,606 --> 01:31:21,374
We needed 750 grand
over three years
2044
01:31:21,408 --> 01:31:23,276
to keep the school
from closing down.
2045
01:31:23,309 --> 01:31:25,245
We blew way past that.
2046
01:31:25,278 --> 01:31:27,515
We got enough to buy back
the base, redevelop it.
2047
01:31:29,249 --> 01:31:32,586
And the speech,
the viral speech?
2048
01:31:32,620 --> 01:31:34,354
Can I get a motion to vote?
2049
01:31:34,387 --> 01:31:35,523
Actually,
I'm here about that...
2050
01:31:35,556 --> 01:31:38,091
Fuck, what's the word?
Resolution.
2051
01:31:38,124 --> 01:31:40,393
- I'll get it.
- Mike, do you want to help him and...
2052
01:31:40,427 --> 01:31:41,662
Yeah.
2053
01:31:41,695 --> 01:31:43,564
Just have it low enough.
2054
01:31:43,597 --> 01:31:45,331
Just leave enough room
for that road sign in there.
2055
01:31:45,365 --> 01:31:47,100
- Uh, am I supposed to have these on?
- No glasses.
2056
01:31:47,133 --> 01:31:49,537
I'm lost.
2057
01:31:49,570 --> 01:31:51,137
Okay, Dad, that's good,
2058
01:31:51,170 --> 01:31:52,540
but you have to leave after.
2059
01:31:52,573 --> 01:31:53,339
All right, one more time.
2060
01:31:53,373 --> 01:31:56,175
I guess they weren't
principles.
2061
01:31:57,444 --> 01:31:59,547
They're just hobbies.
2062
01:32:06,620 --> 01:32:08,622
Holy shit, I think we got it.
2063
01:32:08,656 --> 01:32:11,057
Oh, thank God.
2064
01:32:23,136 --> 01:32:25,204
That was really just
baiting the hook.
2065
01:32:25,238 --> 01:32:27,575
You guys took it from there.
I was never expecting her.
2066
01:32:27,608 --> 01:32:29,577
Oh, I had a fucking blast.
2067
01:32:31,244 --> 01:32:33,212
So you used me.
2068
01:32:35,214 --> 01:32:36,684
We used you?
2069
01:32:36,717 --> 01:32:39,653
You guys only show up here
once every four years,
2070
01:32:39,687 --> 01:32:42,188
and only then
'cause it's a swing state.
2071
01:32:42,221 --> 01:32:44,592
And then, when it's over,
you're gone.
2072
01:32:44,625 --> 01:32:46,192
But we're still here
2073
01:32:46,225 --> 01:32:48,462
with all the same problems
we had before,
2074
01:32:48,495 --> 01:32:50,396
just waiting around
for you to come back
2075
01:32:50,431 --> 01:32:53,266
and make the same
empty promises as last time.
2076
01:32:54,300 --> 01:32:56,169
We used the system.
2077
01:32:56,202 --> 01:32:57,538
You make millions of dollars
2078
01:32:57,571 --> 01:32:59,305
funneling tens of millions
of dollars
2079
01:32:59,339 --> 01:33:03,444
into this election economy.
2080
01:33:03,477 --> 01:33:06,513
All we did is take a cut.
2081
01:33:08,181 --> 01:33:09,750
Hmm.
2082
01:33:09,783 --> 01:33:11,351
Well...
2083
01:33:11,384 --> 01:33:13,921
I guess I just...
2084
01:33:13,954 --> 01:33:18,626
I thought that maybe you and I
had a little something.
2085
01:33:23,296 --> 01:33:26,232
I'm 28. I mean...
2086
01:33:26,265 --> 01:33:30,169
In what world
would this be okay?
2087
01:33:32,338 --> 01:33:34,441
D.C. and L.A.,
parts of New York,
2088
01:33:34,475 --> 01:33:36,309
- Miami, maybe Dallas.
- Mm.
2089
01:33:38,412 --> 01:33:40,414
Look...
2090
01:33:41,448 --> 01:33:43,717
- It wasn't personal.
- Mm.
2091
01:33:43,751 --> 01:33:45,486
It was math.
2092
01:33:45,519 --> 01:33:47,253
Math.
2093
01:33:48,422 --> 01:33:52,358
But this system,
the way we elect people,
2094
01:33:52,392 --> 01:33:54,360
it's terrifying.
2095
01:33:54,394 --> 01:33:56,396
And exhausting.
2096
01:33:56,430 --> 01:33:59,533
And I think it's
driving us all insane.
2097
01:34:07,775 --> 01:34:09,610
You know what
the real problem here
2098
01:34:09,643 --> 01:34:11,645
is that the media
is completely complicit
2099
01:34:11,679 --> 01:34:13,447
- in this sort of thing.
- Oh, I absolutely agree.
2100
01:34:13,480 --> 01:34:14,715
I mean, it's like
Neil Postman said...
2101
01:34:14,748 --> 01:34:16,315
in entertaining ourselves,
2102
01:34:16,349 --> 01:34:17,985
- news has become entertainment.
- Yeah. Yeah.
2103
01:34:18,018 --> 01:34:19,820
- And when that happens... it's gone.
- Yeah.
2104
01:34:19,853 --> 01:34:21,555
I thought he knew.
I mean, I would get so nervous
2105
01:34:21,588 --> 01:34:23,424
- every time he would come in. I would just, like...
- Oh, no.
2106
01:34:23,457 --> 01:34:24,558
I couldn't get
my coffee order right,
2107
01:34:24,591 --> 01:34:25,793
and I was giving him
the wrong thing.
2108
01:34:25,826 --> 01:34:27,428
Oh, you were great.
You were perfect.
2109
01:34:27,461 --> 01:34:28,729
Plus, you know, he has,
you know,
2110
01:34:28,762 --> 01:34:30,497
dreamy eyes a little bit,
so, I mean...
2111
01:34:30,531 --> 01:34:31,832
- Yeah.
- He's-he's dashing.
2112
01:34:31,865 --> 01:34:34,300
He actually made me cry.
2113
01:34:34,333 --> 01:34:36,603
- He was, like, a shithead.
- Yeah.
2114
01:34:36,637 --> 01:34:38,505
It metastasizes,
so it-it's growing
2115
01:34:38,539 --> 01:34:39,740
- and-and whatever, so...
- Yeah.
2116
01:34:39,773 --> 01:34:41,408
Well, it becomes...
it's sort of like
2117
01:34:41,442 --> 01:34:42,576
any sort of
autoimmune disorder.
2118
01:34:42,609 --> 01:34:43,844
- Yeah.
- It's like... it's like lupus.
2119
01:34:43,877 --> 01:34:45,344
Know what I mean?
2120
01:34:45,378 --> 01:34:46,714
That's actually
a really great metaphor.
2121
01:34:46,747 --> 01:34:48,582
- That's... that's like...
- It's a simile.
2122
01:34:48,615 --> 01:34:50,249
- 'Cause you said...
- 'Cause I said...
2123
01:34:50,283 --> 01:34:51,719
- I said it's "like."
- You said it's "like."
2124
01:34:51,752 --> 01:34:53,352
Yeah, right.
It's like lupus.
2125
01:34:54,621 --> 01:34:57,458
What a clusterfuck.
2126
01:34:57,491 --> 01:34:59,493
Amen.
2127
01:35:03,697 --> 01:35:05,364
How we looking?
2128
01:35:05,398 --> 01:35:08,367
Well, they're saying
these, uh, back acres
2129
01:35:08,402 --> 01:35:11,672
are gonna become the over-55
community health center.
2130
01:35:11,705 --> 01:35:13,540
- Uh-huh.
- Madison has promised
2131
01:35:13,574 --> 01:35:15,341
a satellite campus
for the front.
2132
01:35:15,374 --> 01:35:17,478
Okay. And you know
that we have to redo
2133
01:35:17,511 --> 01:35:18,746
the septic on the back 50?
2134
01:35:18,779 --> 01:35:20,279
- We heard all about it.
- Okay.
2135
01:35:20,313 --> 01:35:21,347
Hey, you.
2136
01:35:21,380 --> 01:35:22,683
Oh, hey, you.
2137
01:35:22,716 --> 01:35:25,486
She is something, huh?
2138
01:35:31,592 --> 01:35:33,560
Are you listening to me?
2139
01:35:36,362 --> 01:35:38,364
Are you listening to me?
2140
01:35:39,600 --> 01:35:41,769
Are you listening to me?
2141
01:35:41,802 --> 01:35:43,369
Oh, Gary, honey.
2142
01:35:43,403 --> 01:35:44,738
I'm just so excited.
2143
01:35:44,772 --> 01:35:46,807
I can't wait till we get
the café tables in.
2144
01:35:46,840 --> 01:35:50,778
I think people are really gonna
like those a lot, you know?
2145
01:35:50,811 --> 01:35:54,081
- And then we can put the umbrellas up.
- Mm-hmm.
2146
01:35:54,114 --> 01:35:56,817
And people can just sit outside
and have coffee and...
2147
01:35:56,850 --> 01:35:58,351
You know.
2148
01:35:58,384 --> 01:35:59,620
Are you...
are you listening to me?
2149
01:35:59,653 --> 01:36:01,822
- Mm-hmm, mm...
- Are you listening to me?
2150
01:36:01,855 --> 01:36:04,357
Hey, fuckup. Hey, fuckup.
2151
01:36:04,390 --> 01:36:06,894
- Are you listening to me?
- Yes, yes, yes.
2152
01:36:06,927 --> 01:36:08,662
I'm listening to you.
2153
01:36:08,695 --> 01:36:11,397
You don't open a dossier
for less than $2 million.
2154
01:36:11,431 --> 01:36:13,801
I know. That's what I'm talking
to them about right now.
2155
01:36:13,834 --> 01:36:15,435
$2 million.
2156
01:36:15,469 --> 01:36:16,804
God, I hate you.
2157
01:36:16,837 --> 01:36:18,539
Ditto.
2158
01:36:20,574 --> 01:36:22,509
Gary?
2159
01:36:22,543 --> 01:36:24,711
Gary, you there?
2160
01:36:24,745 --> 01:36:26,747
Gary?
2161
01:36:26,780 --> 01:36:28,715
Yo, Gary.
2162
01:36:30,918 --> 01:36:32,385
Ah, cheers!
2163
01:36:56,677 --> 01:36:58,912
Colonel Jack Hastings,
Deerlaken...
2164
01:36:58,946 --> 01:37:00,981
did the media fall
for a false narrative
2165
01:37:01,014 --> 01:37:03,483
just because it fit
into our preconceived notion
2166
01:37:03,517 --> 01:37:05,853
of the divide of this country
between red and blue
2167
01:37:05,886 --> 01:37:08,155
without actually
checking the facts?
2168
01:37:08,188 --> 01:37:10,424
Were we irresponsible?
2169
01:37:10,457 --> 01:37:11,592
Well, we're the news.
2170
01:37:11,625 --> 01:37:14,161
Are we not supposed to
cover the news?
2171
01:37:14,194 --> 01:37:16,163
I mean, these are
newsworthy stories.
2172
01:37:16,196 --> 01:37:18,665
We're absolutely in the right
to cover them.
2173
01:37:18,699 --> 01:37:22,469
It is literally our job
to cover the news.
2174
01:37:22,502 --> 01:37:23,670
But isn't there a way
to report the news
2175
01:37:23,704 --> 01:37:25,405
without so much speculation,
2176
01:37:25,439 --> 01:37:27,474
without a false sense
of urgency
2177
01:37:27,507 --> 01:37:30,177
that causes us to
breathlessly report "facts"
2178
01:37:30,210 --> 01:37:31,712
that maybe are not facts?
2179
01:37:31,745 --> 01:37:33,747
And are we framing
these stories
2180
01:37:33,780 --> 01:37:35,782
on an artificial
right-left axis
2181
01:37:35,816 --> 01:37:38,719
because that's how
our pundit economy is set up?
2182
01:37:38,752 --> 01:37:40,754
Is there a better way
to do this?
2183
01:37:46,460 --> 01:37:47,361
I'm just kidding.
2184
01:37:47,393 --> 01:37:48,962
Unfortunately,
we have to leave it there.
2185
01:37:48,996 --> 01:37:51,431
- Thank you all for watching.
- She's...
2186
01:37:51,465 --> 01:37:52,933
She's good.
2187
01:37:58,972 --> 01:38:01,608
♪ Talking like we used to do ♪
2188
01:38:02,943 --> 01:38:05,612
♪ It was always me and you ♪
2189
01:38:06,847 --> 01:38:10,751
♪ Hold on, darling ♪
2190
01:38:11,985 --> 01:38:14,521
♪ This body is yours ♪
2191
01:38:14,554 --> 01:38:18,625
♪ This body is yours and mine ♪
2192
01:38:19,893 --> 01:38:25,499
♪ Well, hold on, my darling ♪
2193
01:38:25,532 --> 01:38:28,001
♪ This mess was yours ♪
2194
01:38:29,636 --> 01:38:32,773
♪ Now your mess is mine ♪
2195
01:38:38,612 --> 01:38:42,049
♪ Ah-ooh ♪
2196
01:38:43,717 --> 01:38:46,620
♪ Your mess is mine ♪
2197
01:38:46,653 --> 01:38:48,822
♪ See you in
the marketplace... ♪
2198
01:38:48,855 --> 01:38:51,625
Could something
like this happen?
2199
01:38:51,658 --> 01:38:55,762
Legally, this could
absolutely happen.
2200
01:38:55,796 --> 01:39:00,634
Somebody could create
a political organization...
2201
01:39:00,667 --> 01:39:04,671
so-called outside group,
a super PAC, 527...
2202
01:39:04,705 --> 01:39:07,574
raise an unlimited
amount of money,
2203
01:39:07,607 --> 01:39:10,777
and then choose
to give that money
2204
01:39:10,811 --> 01:39:13,714
to another organization,
a charity,
2205
01:39:13,747 --> 01:39:16,683
and use it for public purposes.
2206
01:39:16,717 --> 01:39:19,920
And you don't need
the donors' consent to do that.
2207
01:39:19,953 --> 01:39:21,989
The problem we have is that
2208
01:39:22,022 --> 01:39:25,726
none of the pieces of
the system are working today.
2209
01:39:25,759 --> 01:39:29,029
You have regulators like
the Federal Election Commission
2210
01:39:29,062 --> 01:39:30,964
that don't have a quorum,
can't meet,
2211
01:39:30,998 --> 01:39:33,867
and when they do, they disagree
on what the law is.
2212
01:39:33,900 --> 01:39:37,671
You have Congress deadlocked
so it can't rewrite the laws.
2213
01:39:37,704 --> 01:39:39,673
You have the Supreme Court
2214
01:39:39,706 --> 01:39:43,143
that thinks that
almost nothing is corrupt
2215
01:39:43,176 --> 01:39:47,748
and that citizens won't think
the sale of access...
2216
01:39:47,781 --> 01:39:50,017
what the court calls
ingratiation
2217
01:39:50,050 --> 01:39:54,788
in return for giving money
to candidates... is a problem.
2218
01:39:54,821 --> 01:39:57,624
So, to sum up,
we currently have
2219
01:39:57,657 --> 01:39:59,026
hundreds of millions
to billions of dollars
2220
01:39:59,059 --> 01:40:01,628
that is, uh, uh, untraceable,
2221
01:40:01,661 --> 01:40:04,097
uh, that can pour into groups
2222
01:40:04,131 --> 01:40:07,100
that are actually coordinating
with-with candidates
2223
01:40:07,134 --> 01:40:10,070
who end up having to spend
a good amount of their time
2224
01:40:10,103 --> 01:40:12,039
raising more and more money
to keep up
2225
01:40:12,072 --> 01:40:15,008
with the arms race
that is occurring.
2226
01:40:15,042 --> 01:40:19,046
Uh, the money continues
to pour in and corrupt
2227
01:40:19,079 --> 01:40:21,782
not just where
they spend their time
2228
01:40:21,815 --> 01:40:24,918
and how they spend their time
but on the types of legislation
2229
01:40:24,951 --> 01:40:27,821
that they would even bring
to the fore.
2230
01:40:27,854 --> 01:40:30,791
And the one group
that would be charged
2231
01:40:30,824 --> 01:40:35,896
with regulating, uh,
this spigot, uh, doesn't meet
2232
01:40:35,929 --> 01:40:38,065
'cause there aren't
enough of them.
2233
01:40:38,098 --> 01:40:40,067
Yes.
2234
01:40:43,203 --> 01:40:45,672
I realize that's not helpful
to you, but...
2235
01:40:45,705 --> 01:40:47,607
It is very helpful.
Thank you.
2236
01:40:47,641 --> 01:40:48,875
♪ Ooh ♪
2237
01:40:48,909 --> 01:40:51,745
♪ Your mess is mine ♪
2238
01:40:54,915 --> 01:40:57,084
♪ Your mess is mine. ♪
2239
01:41:24,885 --> 01:41:29,885
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