Original subtitles

The plane! The plane!

Today it's you who is almost late, boss.

Not likely, Tattoo. Not likely.

Ah, it's going to be a glorious day.

Would you permit it to be another way?

Smiles, everyone. Smiles.

We want our guests to feel welcome.

Could that be little Peter grown so tall?

Little Peter? Well, all things are relative, Tattoo.

The last time I saw him, he was no bigger than you.

That was at his late father's summer palace in Anatolia.

Anatolia? Then he's Crown Prince Peter.

Soon to be coronated as one of the last remaining ruling monarchs in the world.

Then he's also one of the richest men in the world.

Must your mind always work like a cash register?

I was just wondering.

With all his money, why does he need us for any fantasy?

[ Roarke ] For the one fantasy...

all his money can't buy in his world.

It's called, uh, the common touch. The common touch?

Every nobody would like to be a prince.

Every prince would like to be a nobody.

Hemingway!

Mother Goose.

Is he one of the prince's bodyguards?

Oh, no, no, no, Tattoo. I insisted that the prince come to our island alone.

But you are very close to Mr. John Burke's occupation.

He is a detective on the New York City Police Department.

He looks like he's here to arrest someone.

Only himself, Tattoo. Only himself.

He's a man who wants to go back to a time...

when justice and law and order...

were handled on a more... simple basis.

And we are gonna give him that chance, boss?

Oh, yes, Tattoo.

We are going to give him that chance,

that and a lot more.

My dear guests, I am Mr. Roarke, your host.

Welcome to Fantasy Island.

[ Whinnies ]

Well, Mr. Burke, there it is.

Your town.

It's amazing. How did you manage it?

Uh, there are many secrets on Fantasy Island, Mr. Burke.

And as with most secrets,

the answers are sometimes best left unanswered.

[ Chuckles ] Even this looks like it came from the Old West.

Well, it should. Wyatt Earp said...

it gave him many years of good service.

Earp said-- Mm-hmm.

You mean according to legend, right?

All right. Those people down there, uh, where did they come from?

I mean, uh, they're not robots like in that movie?

Oh, no, no, no, Mr. Burke.

No, I assure you. They're quite real.

Yours is not the only fantasy about living in the Old West.

Others also long for the good old days.

In fact, it's our best-selling fantasy.

Some have been here for many years,

others for just a few days.

What about law and order? Is there any law there? Not yet.

Right now, that town is ruled by the six-gun.

Law and order is nothing more than a dream.

Well...

how do I look?

You look fine.

Mr. Roarke, I couldn't have asked for anything more.

Except maybe the Larson brothers, Detective Burke.

What do you know about the Larson brothers? They've been here for two weeks.

You think the Larson brothers killed your partner, don't you?

I don't think, Mr. Roarke. I know they did.

It took me a long time, but I finally nailed 'em.

And some judge released 'em on a technicality.

My partner's lying in his grave, and the Larson brothers are walking the streets.

I don't think, Mr. Roarke. I know they did it.

Well, if they break the law here,

it will be strictly up to you,

Marshal Burke.

Now remember, you are the only law that town has now.

You are the police, the judge and jury too.

It's your town.

Take care of it.

[ Whinnying ]

Your horse, Marshal Burke.

[ Engine Starts ]

This weekend is very important to me.

My last chance to be me,

not a royal "we," so to speak.

Now I shall be a plain, ordinary, workingman.

Mmm! A plain, ordinary, hardworking man.

Hard work does not frighten me.

I'm sure it doesn't.

And now, if you'll please empty your pockets.

I beg your pardon?

I'm going to have to ask you for all your identification.

Well, after all, your fantasy is to try to become...

a plain, ordinary, working-- uh, hardworking man.

You can't very well do that, Peter, with papers in your pocket...

identifying you as one of the handful of royal princes left in the world.

You have a very good point there.

Thank you.

You'll find your work clothes laid out in your room for you, Peter.

Oh, uh, Tattoo, why don't you present Peter...

with the royal scepter he'll be using during the weekend.

[ Door Opens ]

- My pleasure, sir. - [ Forced Chuckle ]

Scepter? More like a fisherman's gaff.

Well, that's precisely what it is. And if you know that much,

at least you won't be starting from scratch.

♪♪ [ Honky-tonk Piano ]

And two cans of peaches.

And two cans of peaches. Yes, sir.

- There. Anything else? - No. That's it for now.

[ Clerk ] All right. Let's see.

That's six dollars and-- and 50 cents.

Just put it on my account.

But... you don't have an account with me.

- I do now. - I don't even know your name.

Maybe you'll remember now.

Yeah. Yeah, sure.

Been a pleasure doin' business with you.

You're my kind of storekeeper.

What's going on here? Why didn't you stop him?

Like Jake Armstrong over at the hardware?

He tried to stop one of 'em last week. Left a widow and three kids.

But you people outnumber him four to one,

and you let him steal you blind.

Like I told you, none of us ever should have come here.

It was a mistake that's turned into a nightmare.

Well, maybe if you had the guts to handle punks like that, it wouldn't be a nightmare.

He'd have killed us. You saw that.

All I saw was a man bluff you into submission.

He saw that you were afraid, and he took advantage of it.

We're alive. That's a certainty.

Maybe he was bluffing, maybe he wasn't.

Right now, I'll take the certainty.

Is this whole town full of brave citizens?

What's it to you? Like Logan says, we're just tryin' to stay alive.

If it means losing your own personal dignity,

it's a hell of a price to have to pay.

You the new marshal? That's right.

Name is Burke,

and I aim to uphold the law.

[ Man Groans ]

You know, Peter, I was just thinkin'.

Yeah? What about?

You-- what you're doin' here.

Well, I'm earning a day's pay, just like you.

Not just like me.

I've been doin' this since I was 10.

Me too. I started young.

Not likely. Look at your hands.

We've only been out a couple hours. You got blisters all over 'em.

You gonna work, or are you gonna talk?

Look, I ain't a nosy guy.

I work with a lot of deckhands.

They mind their own business, I mind mine.

Then why pick on me?

Maybe because you're different.

- I still don't see why. - You don't belong here.

The blisters on your hands tell me that.

Look, if you're in trouble, maybe I can help.

You would help me-- a stranger?

Sure. Why not?

♪♪ [ Honky-tonk Piano ]

And you should've seen their faces.

They were so scared, they were afraid to move.

So you just left, huh? That's it.

Just walked right out.

Not quite, cowboy. I don't recall inviting you into this conversation.

So-- Marshal.

You got business with me?

I was in the general store when you walked out without paying your bill.

You're going to jail, wise guy. Go ahead! Pull it!

Pull it!

This might be your lucky day.

Well, you gonna let him take me?

This man broke the law, and he's going to jail.

This is a wide-open town. That's why we all came here.

Well, that's too bad, because this is my town now.

That's why I came here.

And anybody who breaks the law is going to have to deal with me personally,

and you can pass that along.

Let me see.

I've seen worse, but I can't remember when.

Gotta admit it, Peter. I never thought you'd make it through the day.

[ Chuckles ] To tell you the truth, neither did I.

Hey, take a break, huh?

All right.

- Oh, hi. - Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to disturb you.

That's all right. I was just looking at the view.

- It's beautiful, isn't it? - Mm-hmm.

The more you look, the prettier it gets.

You work around here?

Yeah. I'm a hand on that trawler.

Oh.

I envy you. Out at sea all day with no one to bother you.

I bet you love your work.

Mm-hmm, I do. My name is Peter.

I'm Chris, and my mother always told me to watch out for sailors.

You are very beautiful, you know?

Uh, look, we were just out for a drive, and my friend had a flat tire.

I just thought I'd take a walk while he was fixing it.

That doesn't make you any less beautiful, even if I am a sailor.

[ Chuckles ] Mom was right.

[ Car Horn Honks ] Oh. I gotta go.

Well, no, wait. It's been nice talkin' to you, Pete.

Bye.

Whew. Pretty, huh?

Pretty? She's beautiful.

Where do you suppose she lives, Jamie?

She's a guest at the fancy resort hotel. I've seen her before.

How do I get there? You don't.

Those people don't have much time for hundred-a-week deckhands.

Just point the way, Jamie. That's all I ask.

- Buy me a drink? - Help yourself.

Haven't made yourself exactly popular in here.

[ Chuckles ] I didn't intend to.

It's a lonely life. A long ways to come just to be lonely.

What did you come a long way to do?

[ Man ] Hey, boys, how you doin'?

[ Chattering ]

Frank, bring us a bottle of rum.

Larson brothers.

You know them? You might say I've been waiting for them.

Tom, over there in the corner.

That's Burke. What's he doin' here?

Take it easy, Ed. There's two of us, and just one of him.

Well, I don't like it. That Roarke-- he tricked us.

Here's your drink.

You got nothin' on us here, Burke, so stay loose.

That's where you're wrong. This is my town.

You see, I'm the law here.

There aren't any softhearted judges or liberal D.A.'s to take you off the hook.

I run the whole shooting match,

and you two boys are my target.

We didn't kill your partner, Burke.

I give you two days to make your move, choose your ground.

Because if you don't, I'll choose it for you.

- Choose our ground for what? - To die.

'Cause the next time we meet, that's what's gonna happen.

Now get out of here!

♪♪ [ Disco ]

[ No Audible Dialogue ]

Hi. How did you get here?

Believe me, it wasn't easy. I must've gone through this hotel twice...

before I finally spotted you sitting in here.

May I sit down? You know, you're really incredible.

Well, thank you very much.

If you're looking for your date, I think it'll be at least 10 minutes or so...

before he realizes that urgent message I sent him was a phony.

You?

Look, Pete, it was fun talking to you on the pier and all, but I don't think that, uh--

- Will you have dinner with me tomorrow night? - No, of course not.

Why?

Well, why should I?

Well, for starters, maybe it's because nobody's ever called me Pete before.

And I want you to.

And you always get your way, right?

Well, of course.

Well, then, this will be a first for you. The answer is no,

and I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to please leave my table.

[ Sighs ] I don't think I'm handling this just right.

What's wrong with me?

There's nothing wrong with you.

It's just that I-I didn't spend all my savings to come to this island and this hotel...

to-to end up with a-- with a deckhand on a fishing boat.

[ Laughs ] Wait a minute.

You think I'm a fisherman?

And what are you gonna tell me you are, the shah of Iran?

Well, no. But actually, I'm a--

Is money really that important to you?

Well, isn't it to everyone?

And I don't like being laughed at.

Look. I'm sorry.

I didn't mean to laugh at you.

While I am not a shah, I am a prince,

and I'm to be crowned in a couple of months.

Let me guess. From the smell--

Of course. You must be the next King Neptune.

I can prove it. I'll be right back. Mr. Roarke? Yes?

I would like for you to explain to this young lady exactly who I am, please.

I'm sorry. I'm afraid you have me at a disadvantage. Um--

Oh, come on. It's me.

It's Peter. Prince Peter.

I'm afraid, young man, I've never seen you before in my life. Tattoo?

He's a new one on me, boss.

Oh, come on. You can't do this to me. You must explain who I am.

Whoever you are, we do have a dress code here.

And until you are ready to comply with it, I'll have to ask you to leave.

But this is not fair! Wait-- Wait a minute! It's just not right!

I'm sorry if you were inconvenienced, Miss Malone.

- They won't hurt him, will they? - Does it matter to you?

Well, I don't like to see anyone hurt.

Oh, I see. No, he'll be treated gently.

I hope you enjoy your evening. Excuse me.

Quite a young man, but too impetuous.

Too wild. You wanna do the Hustle? Hmm?

Ah, Prince Peter. How are you? Oh, sure. Now you know me.

Well, of course. Why shouldn't I?

Because an hour ago, you-- Oh, never mind.

I have never been so humiliated in my life.

I am terminating my fantasy right here and now.

Are you? Because of that girl?

Yes, I suppose she's part of it. Uh-huh.

I want back my clothes, my identification and my money.

Oh, I'm afraid that's impossible, Peter.

Impossible? Look, I don't mean to sound pompous, but I am used to getting what I want.

Well, in your country, I'm sure that is the case.

But this is my country, my realm,

and here, I am to be obeyed.

Yes, but-- There are no "buts" about it, Peter.

Remember that you paid for three days of complete anonymity.

Three days of being just an average, hardworking man.

Look, I worked on that boat today. I proved I could do that.

Oh, my dear Peter.

You have so much to learn, and so little time to learn it.

But if you want to learn anything about the people you are to rule,

then you must learn that it is not the physical labor...

that challenges the average man and woman, Peter.

No.

It's the constant assaults on their spirit they must learn to endure.

Assaults on the spirit? Oh, yes.

The violences against the soul are the ones that hurt the most.

The dreams that slip away into middle age.

The drudgery of the same job year after year.

The day-to-day compromises.

The boss who yells at you.

The waiter who looks down his nose because you are wearing the wrong clothes.

A thousand tiny attacks that people like you or I never experience.

Oh, yes.

Your fantasy was a worthy one, Prince Peter,

or I never would have allowed it.

Because to try to become an average man...

is to try to become one of the most overlooked,

unappreciated...

yet noblest creatures of all.

Your, uh, fishing boat pulls out at dawn.

If you are going to get any sleep at all, you'd better be on your way now.

I really don't know what to say.

There is one thing.

I know it sounds crazy, but the girl--

I only talked to her twice. Chris?

Yes? I really like her.

More, I think I love her.

And you're afraid she won't like you as yourself, huh?

No, I know she likes me, but the clothes, the job,

uh, turn her off.

Miss Malone is a young girl who's had some rough years, Peter.

Her father died while she was still in high school.

She had to quit to help support her family.

Yes, I'm afraid she's determined not to get involved with a poor man.

Then at least I should be able to tell her who I really am.

I was under the impression you already had.

Peter, for her sake and yours,

if you really care for her, don't try to win her with your money and title.

Win her with your most important asset--

yourself.

Well, that is something I've never really had to do before.

Good night, Peter. Good night.

And, uh, good luck.

Thank you.

[ Door Opens, Closes ]

[ Chris ] Who's there? It's me.

Who's me? Me-- Peter.

Go away. I gotta talk to you.

I don't wanna talk to you.

If you don't talk to me, I'll-I'll wake up the whole place.

- Can't you take no for an answer? - No. Neither can you.

Look, if you don't get out of here, I'm gonna call for help.

It's 6:00 in the morning.

Will you have dinner with me tonight?

Dinner? I haven't even had breakfast yet. Look, I told you--

Wild orchids. The best I could find.

Thank you. Now, good-bye.

Um-- Tonight? Dinner?

Look, I appreciate the effort, and the flowers are beautiful-- Look, look.

I know you could get me in a lot of trouble here,

and I could lose my job on the fishing boat.

Now, you wouldn't want that on your conscience, would you?

[ Chuckles ] That's a great line.

Then you will have dinner with me?

Okay, but one condition.

After this, you'll please stay out of my life.

I'll pick you up around 8:00.

Bye.

Marshal! Marshal! Good morning, son. What's on your mind?

- It's the Larson brothers! - Larson brothers?

All right, take it easy. What are they doing?

It's Mr. Ben at the general store.

[ Gunfire ] They beat him up and took his money.

They started bustin' up the place.

Well, I guess they chose their ground.

Any sign of Burke?

Not yet. Not as tough as I thought he was.

He's got to have heard that shot. Then where is he?

Right here!

Get out of here!

That was some trap you suckered him into. We're gonna get ourselves killed!

Shut up! We gotta get out.

- Where? - The door.

- I'll never make it! - Suit yourself.

Hold it! That's far enough!

Don't shoot!

Don't shoot. [ Drops Gun ]

Please, Burke, don't shoot me.

Get up! Get up.

This time, you two punks are goin' to jail.

Faker! Faker!

Everyone said you're gonna kill 'em.

You're supposed to kill 'em, you faker!

[ Crowd Shouting, Murmuring ]

[ Man ] You faker!

Hey, come on! [ Peter ] In a minute! In a minute.

Hey! See? I told you it'd fit.

Mmm, yeah, I guess, sort of.

Okay, it doesn't fit so good.

It's the best I could borrow on such short notice, okay?

Mmm.

Hey, in case you need some extra bucks, okay?

I don't know what to say, Jamie.

Say you're gonna give it back to me someday.

You're a real friend.

I guess the first real friend I've ever had.

I'll think of a way to repay you one day.

Hey, someday when you're rich, you can buy me my own fishing boat, okay?

You got it.

It's nightfall. You hadn't been in all day to eat,

and I thought you might be hungry.

Well, thanks.

You certainly surprised a lot of people today when you didn't kill those two men.

Uh-huh. So I noticed.

They're holding a meeting over in the bar. A kangaroo court.

They're drinkin' up a lot of whiskey and gettin' their courage up,

and then they're gonna come right over here and try to hang your three prisoners.

Mmm! This stew is terrific. Thanks.

Are you gonna do something about it? They intend to lynch those three men.

They deserve it, don't they?

You really don't intend to do anything about it?

Why should I?

For the same reason that you couldn't gun 'em down on the street this afternoon.

Because in spite of all of your hatred and need for the Old West,

you're a civilized man, Burke.

You can't do it. They haven't had a trial. They have their rights.

Rights? What about the rights of the people that were robbed, beat up and killed?

What about their rights? The only rights my prisoners have is what I give them!

If you let them hang, that's murder.

It's not murder. It's the law.

No, it's justice. I'm the law. That's the way it was done in the West.

Well, that doesn't make it right, does it?

Now, look-- No, you look.

That badge you wear gives you the power to enforce the law.

It isn't a hunting license.

[ Clatters On Ground ] That's where it belongs, because that's what you've made of it!

[ Door Opens, Closes ]

♪♪ [ Soft Jazz ]

It's been a wonderful evening. I hate to have it end.

It doesn't have to. We're just starting to get to know one another.

That's just the trouble.

Peter, don't you see I can't?

I-I won't get involved.

Why?

You like me. You know you do.

Must money mean everything? People must matter more than things.

Well, that's a lovely storybook idea,

but it just isn't true.

If I really were a prince, as I've been telling you--

Then I'd believe in Mary Poppins and fairy tales,

and-and we'd live very happily ever after.

Then money really is everything to you, isn't it?

When you haven't got it, it's the only thing.

I feel so sorry for you.

I feel very sorry for both of us.

[ Chattering, Shouting ]

Well, boys, looks like your fan club is comin' to pay you a visit.

Burke! You can't let 'em get us. We got rights!

My partner's wife and kids had rights too--

rights to a father and a husband.

We didn't kill him. How many times I gotta tell you?

[ Gunshot ]

The next one won't be in the air, Marshal!

We want those prisoners!

You can't do it, Marshal. You're the law. You owe us.

Owe you what?

I don't owe you a thing.

[ Man ] We want those prisoners! [ Crowd Yelling, Shouting ]

[ Gunshot ]

You might as well all go on home, boys.

There isn't gonna be any hanging here tonight.

[ Voices Overlapping ]

- You can't stop us, Marshal. - Yes, I can, Mr. Logan, and I will.

Because when I start shooting, you're the first one that I'm gonna be aiming at.

Now come on, boys. I'm sorry about this.

I really am. But, uh,

the law is the law,

and some fool has to uphold that law.

Now those men in there, they're gonna be held for trial.

What happens after that depends on a real judge and a real jury.

[ Groaning, Muttering ]

So why don't you all go on home before somebody gets hurt?

I thought the streets of New York City were dangerous, but, uh--

Where are you from? Cleveland.

What'd you do there?

Same thing I do here.

You, um-- You wanna come in and talk?

I-I like the way you talk.

I don't think I'm the kind of girl you wanna know.

Oh. If it weren't for you,

I'd have had them hung.

Why don't you come in?

It's kind of lonely in there. I'm tired of bein' lonely.

My name is Julie.

Julie. I like that name.

All is well that ends well.

Oh, I would say it's just the beginning for Mr. Burke and Julie.

Tattoo, how would you like to live in the Old West, huh?

I don't think so, boss. Nothing exciting ever happens here.

[ Chuckling ] Come on, partner.

Let's go thataway.

[ Imitates Gunshot ] Got you.

[ Both Blowing ]

[ Both Laughing ]

Would you put the bags in the plane, please?

Thank you.

Mr. Roarke, I don't know how to thank you. Oh, no thanks are needed.

I assume your, uh, fantasy was a success, Captain Burke, huh?

Yes, in more ways than one. It's like starting all over again.

I found out what it was really like to be...

judge, jury and cop all rolled into one.

It's a tough road.

You might be interested, then, in a cablegram I received this morning.

It's from your chief of detectives.

They've arrested the man really responsible for your partner's death.

What?

The Larson brothers were innocent just like they said.

Well, of that crime anyway.

Well, looks like I owe a certain person a lot of thanks.

- Enjoy your trip. - What about the town, Mr. Roarke?

Who's going to be the new marshal?

Oh, he probably will be on the next plane.

As I told you, it's our best-selling fantasy.

Well, thank you very much.

Good-bye.

I'm sorry you feel your fantasy didn't work out, Peter. But it did really.

I learned what I had to. I guess I can't ask for much more than that, can I?

And, uh, you've given up hope for Miss Malone?

I had to.

Indeed.

I think we should try.

But last night, you said-- I know.

I said a lot of things last night, Peter. We both did. But you were right.

People do have to be more important than things. I see that now.

I'm glad.

I stayed awake the whole night thinking of what my life would be like without you.

I hate fish, but I love the fisherman.

[ Roarke ] Your plane is leaving.

Oh, before I forget.

Jamie asked me to express his gratitude for the new fishing boat you gave him.

It arrived this morning.

Fishing boat? You gave him? I don't understand.

Explain it to her on the plane, Peter. You'll have plenty of time.

And we expect to be invited to the wedding.

Do you think they'll be happy?

Princess Grace is.

Who is Princess Grace?

Grace Kelly, the princess of Monaco.

What's Monaco? Uh--

[ Sighs ]