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1
00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:10,359
That was our Trev on the phone.
She's on her way now.
2
00:00:10,360 --> 00:00:13,119
Then it's Kelly and Shaun
from Kelly's mum's at 3:30,
3
00:00:13,120 --> 00:00:16,599
and then it's me, you, the gang
and the open road, mate.
4
00:00:16,600 --> 00:00:18,399
You moving out? Say again.
5
00:00:18,400 --> 00:00:21,519
I said, are you moving out, duck?
6
00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:22,639
No, what you on?
7
00:00:22,640 --> 00:00:24,599
Why have you packed so many bags?
8
00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:27,919
It's for the rave.
We're only there for one night.
9
00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:30,239
You said it was a nighter so I've
brought enough for...
10
00:00:30,240 --> 00:00:31,879
Yeah, a nighter. Not a yearer.
11
00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:33,959
Yeah, but, if you think about it
logically,
12
00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:36,759
it's a day, a night,
and then another day and then...
13
00:00:36,760 --> 00:00:38,479
If you're thinking about it
logically,
14
00:00:38,480 --> 00:00:40,279
you need underpants, condoms
and drugs.
15
00:00:40,280 --> 00:00:42,119
They're in the odds and sods bag
over there.
16
00:00:42,120 --> 00:00:45,119
That's all you need, then, brother.
That's all you need. Yeah, but...
17
00:00:45,120 --> 00:00:48,359
We need provisions, mate.
Provisions? Like him?
18
00:00:48,360 --> 00:00:49,959
He coming?
19
00:00:49,960 --> 00:00:51,679
Is he coming? Doesn't have to come.
20
00:00:51,680 --> 00:00:53,519
I weren't set on him.
21
00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:56,279
There's a fucking bag within a bag
here. That's a bag inside a bag.
22
00:00:56,280 --> 00:00:57,679
It's for souvenirs, mate.
23
00:00:57,680 --> 00:01:00,159
In case we see owt for Lolly, Woody
and the kids and that.
24
00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:01,879
We're not going to
American Adventure.
25
00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:04,839
We're not going to get a picture of
your chops going down the log flume.
26
00:01:04,840 --> 00:01:07,759
We're going to a rave. We're going to
get out our heads, have a mash up.
27
00:01:07,760 --> 00:01:10,599
I'm just trying to think in case we
stay, in case we end up somewhere.
28
00:01:10,600 --> 00:01:12,999
You've thought way too much
on this, man.
29
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:14,959
Way too fucking much.
30
00:01:14,960 --> 00:01:16,719
I'm going to go for a wank
31
00:01:16,720 --> 00:01:18,239
and a shit and a bath.
32
00:01:18,240 --> 00:01:20,039
Downsize it a little bit.
33
00:01:20,040 --> 00:01:22,840
Condense it down a bit, brother,
because that's just ridiculous.
34
00:02:47,186 --> 00:03:00,908
Subtitles by MemoryOnSmells
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35
00:03:29,280 --> 00:03:31,359
Ergh.
36
00:03:31,360 --> 00:03:33,919
That was a bit of a wild one
last night, weren't it?
37
00:03:33,920 --> 00:03:34,959
Yeah.
38
00:03:34,960 --> 00:03:38,559
You was a bit wild, anyway.
39
00:03:38,560 --> 00:03:41,599
Do you want me to do some breakfast?
I can do a banging bacon butty.
40
00:03:41,600 --> 00:03:43,879
No, mate, honestly,
I've really got to go.
41
00:03:43,880 --> 00:03:46,359
Fucking hell, is that the time?
Yep.
42
00:03:46,360 --> 00:03:48,799
Well, can I get your number
or summat?
43
00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:50,519
I'm...
44
00:03:50,520 --> 00:03:54,399
I'm never really situated
in the same, like, place
45
00:03:54,400 --> 00:03:57,399
so that probably wouldn't
really work.
46
00:03:57,400 --> 00:03:58,719
Have I done summat wrong?
47
00:03:58,720 --> 00:04:01,079
No. No. Not at all.
48
00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:02,839
I just work with my mum
and my sister
49
00:04:02,840 --> 00:04:05,039
and they're going to fucking flip
so I'd better go.
50
00:04:05,040 --> 00:04:09,040
Nice to meet you, Stu.
51
00:04:16,160 --> 00:04:19,599
Is it there?
52
00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:20,639
Yeah.
53
00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:24,640
Well, come on. Get it open.
We can't eat our dinner till we know.
54
00:04:27,000 --> 00:04:28,519
What if it's a no?
55
00:04:28,520 --> 00:04:30,319
It won't be a no.
It'll be a positive.
56
00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:32,919
You were the star pupil on
that drama course, Shaun.
57
00:04:32,920 --> 00:04:36,359
Word travels fast, don't it?
It does, yeah.
58
00:04:36,360 --> 00:04:40,360
Well, as long as you know that
I tried even if it is a no.
59
00:04:58,040 --> 00:05:00,119
Brilliant. It's a no.
60
00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:02,559
What?
61
00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:06,560
Little sod! He'll have me at it
all day.
62
00:05:06,800 --> 00:05:09,959
We're sorry to inform you that,
after much consideration,
63
00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:12,959
we can't offer you a place
on the photography course
64
00:05:12,960 --> 00:05:15,559
due to the manner in which you left
the drama course
65
00:05:15,560 --> 00:05:19,519
back in January, 1989. That's
a bloody mistake. It has to be.
66
00:05:19,520 --> 00:05:21,879
It's not a mistake, is it?
It's right. I left the course.
67
00:05:21,880 --> 00:05:23,799
It's a different course, Shaun.
They've...
68
00:05:23,800 --> 00:05:26,319
It doesn't matter what course it is.
It's the same college.
69
00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:28,839
Shaun, you was in bits over Michelle.
It doesn't matter.
70
00:05:28,840 --> 00:05:31,279
Like they give a fuck about that.
They're not bothered.
71
00:05:31,280 --> 00:05:33,239
I'm going to get Dr Lenny
to have a word with...
72
00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:35,479
No, you're not. Shaun, you was
on anti-depressants.
73
00:05:35,480 --> 00:05:37,719
It doesn't matter.
You didn't just bloody swan off.
74
00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:40,639
It doesn't matter. They're not going
to take it into consideration.
75
00:05:40,640 --> 00:05:42,319
Just leave it at that.
It does matter.
76
00:05:42,320 --> 00:05:45,079
It doesn't fucking matter!
How many times?
77
00:05:45,080 --> 00:05:48,479
It's my fucking life! Not yours!
It's my fault!
78
00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:50,919
I walked off the fucking course
and I'm not bothered!
79
00:05:50,920 --> 00:05:54,199
I did it to get you off my back
anyway! Fine. Look, just calm down.
80
00:05:54,200 --> 00:05:56,799
I don't care! Fine. I don't care!
81
00:05:56,800 --> 00:05:59,799
OK. Now calm down, Shaun.
82
00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:02,999
Shaun, love, I'm sorry.
All right, I won't say anything.
83
00:06:03,000 --> 00:06:05,199
It's just the injustice of it, love.
It's not right.
84
00:06:05,200 --> 00:06:09,200
It doesn't matter, Mum.
It says no. End of.
85
00:06:18,760 --> 00:06:20,399
Gadge, what have we got here?
86
00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:22,079
Survival gear, Trev.
87
00:06:22,080 --> 00:06:25,199
Cousin's in the air cadets
so he taught me a thing or two.
88
00:06:25,200 --> 00:06:26,719
We're only going for a day.
89
00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:28,999
Yeah, but, I've heard
about these raves, Trev.
90
00:06:29,000 --> 00:06:30,519
Go for a day thinking, "Yeah,"
91
00:06:30,520 --> 00:06:33,039
you end up at another party,
another party, another party.
92
00:06:33,040 --> 00:06:35,239
Some people end up in Ibiza
and everything, mate.
93
00:06:35,240 --> 00:06:37,399
Yeah, all right, Gary.
94
00:06:37,400 --> 00:06:40,279
You haven't listened, have you, mate?
Yeah, I have.
95
00:06:40,280 --> 00:06:43,639
There's still a load of shit here.
There's still a massive pile of shit.
96
00:06:43,640 --> 00:06:45,999
Mate, that's like half of what
you said I couldn't take.
97
00:06:46,000 --> 00:06:49,039
It doesn't matter. There's still too
much there, brother. Way too much.
98
00:06:49,040 --> 00:06:51,439
It's all essential. I can't believe
what I'm looking at.
99
00:06:51,440 --> 00:06:53,959
This is what Trev's got. That's it.
That's what you've got.
100
00:06:53,960 --> 00:06:56,639
You're a bloke. We need it!
What do we need here?
101
00:06:56,640 --> 00:06:59,159
That bag is your sleeping bag, mate.
Let's get what we need.
102
00:06:59,160 --> 00:07:02,679
Let's get your... Sleeping bag, yeah.
We need that. Necessity.
103
00:07:02,680 --> 00:07:04,999
We need a tent to sleep in, don't we?
Necessity.
104
00:07:05,000 --> 00:07:07,239
But, in terms of, like, pig chow,
sweets...
105
00:07:07,240 --> 00:07:09,359
Mate, we need them, mate,
for the road.
106
00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:11,399
Harvey, don't be a dick!
Fuck off, mate.
107
00:07:11,400 --> 00:07:15,400
That's my sweets, mate!
One bag of sweets, made!
108
00:07:18,800 --> 00:07:22,800
Large G&T, please. No problem.
109
00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:35,360
There you are, love. Thanks.
Thank you.
110
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:47,000
There you are. Thank you.
Thank you. Cheers.
111
00:07:58,480 --> 00:08:01,559
Right, that's me done.
All right, cheers.
112
00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:04,799
What's up?
113
00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:06,879
What?
114
00:08:06,880 --> 00:08:08,799
So what am I going to do
about Kelly?
115
00:08:08,800 --> 00:08:10,799
Don't be too hard on her, Lol.
116
00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:14,559
She has to do from nine to one, Mum,
yeah? Who can't do them hours?
117
00:08:14,560 --> 00:08:16,479
She's just struggling a bit
at the minute.
118
00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:19,679
Struggling with what? What?
119
00:08:19,680 --> 00:08:21,559
Look, she's going away this weekend.
120
00:08:21,560 --> 00:08:24,119
One final blow out with Gadge and
Harvey and that. Oh, God.
121
00:08:24,120 --> 00:08:27,959
I'll sit her down on Sunday, have a
proper good word with her. I promise.
122
00:08:27,960 --> 00:08:31,960
She'll be here on time every fucking
day next week with bells on.
123
00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:35,439
Yeah? Yeah, fine.
124
00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:37,839
You still on for the barbecue later?
Yeah, definitely.
125
00:08:37,840 --> 00:08:41,199
Want me to bring owt?
No. You're good.
126
00:08:41,200 --> 00:08:45,200
See you later. Nice one. Thanks, Mum.
See ya.
127
00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:52,279
Mate, just give her five minutes.
We'll find her.
128
00:08:52,280 --> 00:08:54,719
We can't go without her, can we,
Harv? You're being a nob.
129
00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:56,879
We can, boss. That's the thing.
We can.
130
00:08:56,880 --> 00:08:58,799
Are you taking the piss? Come on.
131
00:08:58,800 --> 00:09:00,479
I had my mix in here. Where is it?
132
00:09:00,480 --> 00:09:02,479
She's just forgot
that we told her hers.
133
00:09:02,480 --> 00:09:04,919
She's probably stood outside
Shaun's. No, she's there.
134
00:09:04,920 --> 00:09:08,840
Oh, there she is, Harv.
135
00:09:12,480 --> 00:09:14,719
3:30 at your mum's, Kel. What?
136
00:09:14,720 --> 00:09:17,279
3:30 at your mum's. Nice one.
Where the fuck were you?
137
00:09:17,280 --> 00:09:20,359
At the pub. Wicked. Nice one.
138
00:09:20,360 --> 00:09:23,119
Are you getting in?
Weren't it 4:30 at Shaun's?
139
00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:25,879
No. It was 3:30 at your mum's.
140
00:09:25,880 --> 00:09:27,759
Get in, then. Erm...
141
00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:30,119
Swing by mine and I'll get ready.
142
00:09:30,120 --> 00:09:32,079
Absolutely not, no.
I'll have a shower.
143
00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:34,519
I'll literally be two seconds
and I'll come straight out.
144
00:09:34,520 --> 00:09:36,719
Not happening. Get in the car
or don't get in the car.
145
00:09:36,720 --> 00:09:39,279
My outfit's on the bed. We've been
driving round for an hour.
146
00:09:39,280 --> 00:09:42,199
Get in the car or fuck off.
Just get in. You're not coming.
147
00:09:42,200 --> 00:09:44,799
Come on. You're taking the piss?
Absolutely not. Can we go?
148
00:09:44,800 --> 00:09:47,119
I'll be one second. I'll go in,
I'll have a quick...
149
00:09:47,120 --> 00:09:49,479
Listen, you great frigging twat,
get in the car now.
150
00:09:49,480 --> 00:09:51,959
I've been driving round for
a fucking hour. Get in the car.
151
00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:54,319
Kel, just get in the car. Come on.
Get in the fucking car.
152
00:09:54,320 --> 00:09:55,799
So I'm going to go like this? Yeah.
153
00:09:55,800 --> 00:09:58,319
I'm not fucking arguing with you.
I'm going. Bye, bye, bye.
154
00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:00,519
Hold on, then. Stop being
such a prick. Thank you.
155
00:10:00,520 --> 00:10:01,879
Budge up, you fat...
156
00:10:01,880 --> 00:10:04,079
Budge up, then, you fucking
ginge minge.
157
00:10:04,080 --> 00:10:06,039
I'm the only one
that's not said owt.
158
00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,368
Hold on! I'm not even in the car!
159
00:10:14,312 --> 00:10:15,991
Have you got a drink? Right.
160
00:10:15,992 --> 00:10:18,031
Who likes salmonella?
161
00:10:18,032 --> 00:10:19,392
Yeah!
162
00:10:19,392 --> 00:10:21,112
Who likes violent illness?
163
00:10:21,113 --> 00:10:22,312
Yeah!
164
00:10:22,351 --> 00:10:23,711
Who likes throwing up?
165
00:10:23,711 --> 00:10:27,711
Doo-dee-dee-doo-dee-doo-dee-doo!
166
00:10:27,951 --> 00:10:30,071
Yeah, that's cool. Doing well, there.
167
00:10:30,072 --> 00:10:32,391
How far can you slide down? Whoo!
168
00:10:32,391 --> 00:10:35,311
Oh, you big boy.
Have you brought them out?
169
00:10:35,311 --> 00:10:37,631
How are you, sweetheart?
I'm all right.
170
00:10:37,632 --> 00:10:38,951
Give us a kiss.
171
00:10:38,951 --> 00:10:40,790
You've got ketchup on your...
172
00:10:40,791 --> 00:10:42,550
Don't be like that. Get out of it!
173
00:10:42,551 --> 00:10:45,310
Don't embarrass me! Get off!
Don't embarrass me!
174
00:10:45,311 --> 00:10:48,750
Oh, careful.
175
00:10:48,751 --> 00:10:50,550
What are you doing?
Tried to kiss me.
176
00:10:50,551 --> 00:10:52,270
You've got tomato sauce
all in your...
177
00:10:52,271 --> 00:10:53,990
Yeah, he just kissed me, as well.
178
00:10:53,991 --> 00:10:57,631
Is it bad? How bad is it out of ten?
179
00:10:59,311 --> 00:11:01,430
Oh! Oh! Oh!
180
00:11:01,431 --> 00:11:04,271
You've ruined the day!
181
00:11:12,831 --> 00:11:16,831
Take a peek on these sweeties.
Oh, amazing. Double barrels.
182
00:11:17,231 --> 00:11:19,990
Just like a shotgun.
183
00:11:19,991 --> 00:11:22,070
We'll go full.
Me and you, we'll go full, Gadget.
184
00:11:22,071 --> 00:11:25,070
Mate, mate, one at least.
Girls, you go halves on one.
185
00:11:25,071 --> 00:11:26,670
Nah, I reckon I could
drop one of them.
186
00:11:26,671 --> 00:11:28,630
Shaun the prawn, you have a 16th.
187
00:11:28,631 --> 00:11:29,790
Yeah?
188
00:11:29,791 --> 00:11:32,750
Give it a nibble, see what
you think. Serious.
189
00:11:32,751 --> 00:11:34,110
I know what you're trying to do.
190
00:11:34,111 --> 00:11:38,111
Mate, honestly, it's like nothing
else you've ever had.
191
00:11:38,311 --> 00:11:41,990
It's not like this shit.
It just makes you...
192
00:11:41,991 --> 00:11:43,831
Makes you want to hug the world,
basically.
193
00:11:43,832 --> 00:11:47,271
This is what you feel like. This is
it. All of the time. All the time.
194
00:11:47,271 --> 00:11:50,390
Just love, man. Just love.
Gay, straight, love.
195
00:11:50,391 --> 00:11:51,831
You just want to love.
196
00:11:51,832 --> 00:11:55,831
You want to mix with other people
in love.
197
00:12:00,911 --> 00:12:04,510
Now, then, is everyone full off
impetigo burgers? Yeah, bloody hell.
198
00:12:04,511 --> 00:12:06,870
I feel sick but...
It's just as well.
199
00:12:06,871 --> 00:12:10,430
You'll notice I didn't eat much
during that whole affair.
200
00:12:10,431 --> 00:12:13,190
Yeah, because you didn't want to get
ill. I didn't want to get ill.
201
00:12:13,191 --> 00:12:16,310
That's correct. But we will. There's
a reason for not wanting to get ill
202
00:12:16,311 --> 00:12:18,910
because we're going to find out
who the hardest man or woman is
203
00:12:18,911 --> 00:12:22,150
via the medium of arm wrestling.
204
00:12:22,151 --> 00:12:25,110
This is going to end in disaster.
I want to watch this.
205
00:12:25,111 --> 00:12:28,830
Right, ready when you are. I'll lay
the table. Come on, Nicky. Come on.
206
00:12:28,831 --> 00:12:31,270
Keep hold of the table. I'm on it.
207
00:12:31,271 --> 00:12:34,110
Come on, Nicky! Come on!
208
00:12:34,111 --> 00:12:38,111
I love his face! Come on, Woody!
209
00:12:38,511 --> 00:12:41,030
You have to touch the table.
Don't put your head on it.
210
00:12:41,031 --> 00:12:43,270
Honestly, she's really hard.
211
00:12:43,271 --> 00:12:44,870
Come on.
212
00:12:44,871 --> 00:12:47,950
Oh, no. Yes!
213
00:12:47,951 --> 00:12:49,030
Yes.
214
00:12:49,031 --> 00:12:51,710
Straights against lesbians,
get on that.
215
00:12:51,711 --> 00:12:55,711
Is that your wanking hand?
It is, yeah. It's really strong.
216
00:12:55,791 --> 00:12:57,391
Pathetic.
217
00:12:59,031 --> 00:13:01,390
Oh!
218
00:13:01,391 --> 00:13:03,870
Ah!
219
00:13:03,871 --> 00:13:07,550
Do it! Do it! Do it!
220
00:13:07,551 --> 00:13:10,350
Go on, give your mum a hand.
Oh, shit. He's really strong.
221
00:13:10,351 --> 00:13:11,470
Push it that way.
222
00:13:11,471 --> 00:13:14,511
No. No. No.
223
00:13:17,471 --> 00:13:20,350
I'm not playing!
224
00:13:20,351 --> 00:13:22,710
Erm, I don't want to be funny
or anything
225
00:13:22,711 --> 00:13:24,790
but are you sure we're going
the right way,
226
00:13:24,791 --> 00:13:26,550
because it seems a bit familiar,
Gadge?
227
00:13:26,551 --> 00:13:28,710
Yeah, no, no, we're on
the right track.
228
00:13:28,711 --> 00:13:31,070
That dry wall looks a bit familiar,
Gadge.
229
00:13:31,071 --> 00:13:35,071
We definitely have been down there,
mate. Yeah, yeah.
230
00:13:35,431 --> 00:13:39,431
Please do, yeah. A to Z.
231
00:13:40,471 --> 00:13:43,710
You couldn't have got a pocket one?
Look out, fatty boom boom.
232
00:13:43,711 --> 00:13:45,670
I couldn't get a pocket one, no.
I'm sorry.
233
00:13:45,671 --> 00:13:48,510
Are you serious? What?
I need to read it.
234
00:13:48,511 --> 00:13:50,590
I need to match the map
with the road.
235
00:13:50,591 --> 00:13:54,591
I know, mate, but you don't have to
put it up on the fucking windscreen.
236
00:13:55,031 --> 00:13:57,270
You're a fucking liability, mate.
237
00:13:57,271 --> 00:13:59,670
Do you even know how to read a map,
Gadge?
238
00:13:59,671 --> 00:14:02,430
Listen, I know how to read a map,
mate, right?
239
00:14:02,431 --> 00:14:04,270
That's all you need to know.
240
00:14:04,271 --> 00:14:08,271
Fucking read it, then.
I'm reading it. Right.
241
00:14:08,471 --> 00:14:11,790
What? Right here?
No, no, no, no, hold on.
242
00:14:11,791 --> 00:14:14,310
We're this green line here.
243
00:14:14,311 --> 00:14:18,311
And, when we get down to this little
yellow line, we go left, right?
244
00:14:18,911 --> 00:14:21,790
Right, you ready, Milk? Er, yeah.
245
00:14:21,791 --> 00:14:24,630
Don't lick it. I've got to lick it.
I've got to lick it to stick it on.
246
00:14:24,631 --> 00:14:25,950
Wet it with your finger.
247
00:14:25,951 --> 00:14:29,030
Just going to get that perfectly
between them eyebrows.
248
00:14:29,031 --> 00:14:30,390
Get it right there.
249
00:14:30,391 --> 00:14:33,150
That's the mother. Right there.
250
00:14:33,151 --> 00:14:35,150
Right, ask us some questions.
251
00:14:35,151 --> 00:14:37,990
It's so you. Am I male?
252
00:14:37,991 --> 00:14:40,070
Yes, you are.
253
00:14:40,071 --> 00:14:43,390
Erm, am I... Am I famous?
254
00:14:43,391 --> 00:14:44,510
No.
255
00:14:44,511 --> 00:14:46,750
Well, I don't know.
256
00:14:46,751 --> 00:14:50,751
In the area, amongst certain females,
probably famous.
257
00:14:51,791 --> 00:14:55,791
Am I fat?
258
00:14:56,111 --> 00:15:00,111
From what I've seen... Yeah?
..pale and tired.
259
00:15:00,871 --> 00:15:03,990
Am I a penis? You are a penis.
260
00:15:03,991 --> 00:15:07,150
But it's in a certain place.
261
00:15:07,151 --> 00:15:10,910
So close. Quite close to
where it is now.
262
00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:12,471
You lot are dickheads.
263
00:15:16,071 --> 00:15:18,230
Dickhead!
264
00:15:18,231 --> 00:15:21,270
Am I female? Yes.
265
00:15:21,271 --> 00:15:23,110
Oh, she's a powerful woman.
266
00:15:23,111 --> 00:15:24,590
Well, she's...
267
00:15:24,591 --> 00:15:28,510
Am I famous? Yes, but for
all the wrong reasons.
268
00:15:28,511 --> 00:15:30,310
Do you know who she is?
269
00:15:30,311 --> 00:15:33,430
No. Maybe not ask the kids. Oh, OK.
270
00:15:33,431 --> 00:15:35,230
Am I Margaret Thatcher? No.
271
00:15:35,231 --> 00:15:38,070
No, boo! Boo! Thank fuck for that.
272
00:15:38,071 --> 00:15:39,830
You're worse than Thatcher.
273
00:15:39,831 --> 00:15:42,230
Worse than Thatcher? Shit the bed.
274
00:15:42,231 --> 00:15:43,630
Give us a go on that.
275
00:15:43,631 --> 00:15:45,110
Am I old, then?
276
00:15:45,111 --> 00:15:48,670
No. No. Not old.
277
00:15:48,671 --> 00:15:50,230
I'll give you a clue.
278
00:15:50,231 --> 00:15:52,430
I call you it all the time.
279
00:15:52,431 --> 00:15:53,591
Oh, Myra Hindley.
280
00:15:55,311 --> 00:15:58,990
Shit the bed. Fuck you.
281
00:15:58,991 --> 00:16:01,590
Gadge, we've fucking been past this.
We're not!
282
00:16:01,591 --> 00:16:04,630
I'm telling you now, we've been past
that fucking sign about four times.
283
00:16:04,631 --> 00:16:08,550
There's a place here called Cock End
and... You're a cock-end.
284
00:16:08,551 --> 00:16:10,750
Mate, if we've been past Cock End,
I'd know about it.
285
00:16:10,751 --> 00:16:13,270
That mile sign. We've passed it,
Gary. We've not.
286
00:16:13,271 --> 00:16:16,430
Yes, we fucking have, mate.
That milestone? That mile sign.
287
00:16:16,431 --> 00:16:19,390
That mile thing. That milestone.
Past it.
288
00:16:19,391 --> 00:16:21,630
It's the third time passing it, boss.
289
00:16:21,631 --> 00:16:24,350
You've not been watching the fucking
road. I swear to God, mate!
290
00:16:24,351 --> 00:16:26,590
I can't watch the road
and read the map.
291
00:16:26,591 --> 00:16:29,230
I ask you for one thing and you
don't do fuck all right, do you?
292
00:16:29,231 --> 00:16:31,390
You watch the road and I...
I am watching the road.
293
00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:33,510
You've been doing owt.
We have to work as a team.
294
00:16:33,511 --> 00:16:36,110
Look, the fucking map's
got holes in it.
295
00:16:36,111 --> 00:16:38,630
Good map, then. It was the best
we could do. Well done, Gary.
296
00:16:38,631 --> 00:16:42,631
I swear to God, mate, you're ruining
our fucking lives at the moment.
297
00:16:43,191 --> 00:16:45,510
You have no fucking idea, do you?
298
00:16:45,511 --> 00:16:47,670
You have no idea.
299
00:16:47,671 --> 00:16:50,910
As you can see, I have brought out
my ghetto blaster.
300
00:16:50,911 --> 00:16:52,630
It is not the most technical
of devices
301
00:16:52,631 --> 00:16:55,910
but I have maxed up the volume there.
It's on maximum.
302
00:16:55,911 --> 00:16:57,870
I'm about to take you
to another galaxy
303
00:16:57,871 --> 00:17:00,590
and we're going to party
like it's 1999. Whoo. Right?
304
00:17:00,591 --> 00:17:02,911
What's this? Erect yourselves.
305
00:17:05,431 --> 00:17:09,431
Oh. Dancing. Do you want to dance,
Milo? You want to dance?
306
00:17:10,071 --> 00:17:13,790
Oh, man.
307
00:17:13,791 --> 00:17:16,271
Eh, you having that?
308
00:17:19,111 --> 00:17:21,790
Mate, there's too many lines.
Shut up, Gary. I'm driving here.
309
00:17:21,791 --> 00:17:23,670
There's red, there's blue,
there's green.
310
00:17:23,671 --> 00:17:26,951
I swear to fucking...
Oi! What's this?
311
00:17:30,591 --> 00:17:33,910
Twat!
312
00:17:33,911 --> 00:17:36,670
Oh, my God. Leave him. Leave him.
Stop it.
313
00:17:36,671 --> 00:17:39,950
Now look what you've done,
you fucking stresshead, mate!
314
00:17:39,951 --> 00:17:42,270
You've got my arm. Children!
315
00:17:42,271 --> 00:17:44,110
Like fucking children.
316
00:17:44,111 --> 00:17:45,990
Now the map's gone.
317
00:17:45,991 --> 00:17:48,910
Fucking hell, lads. We don't know
where the fuck we are anyway, Gary.
318
00:17:48,911 --> 00:17:52,911
That went too far.
319
00:17:57,711 --> 00:17:59,190
Have a fag if you want a fag.
320
00:17:59,191 --> 00:18:00,711
Cheers, mate.
321
00:18:03,991 --> 00:18:06,190
Whoa. Careful. Be careful.
322
00:18:06,191 --> 00:18:10,191
Taking turns. Taking turns.
323
00:18:13,151 --> 00:18:17,151
Doing a little routine.
324
00:18:17,351 --> 00:18:21,351
# Since I came to know you, baby,
yeah
325
00:18:21,631 --> 00:18:25,590
# I've been telling you
how sweet you are
326
00:18:25,591 --> 00:18:29,591
# I've been telling you
how good you are
327
00:18:29,831 --> 00:18:33,831
# Now you want to try and tell me
how I look... #
328
00:18:33,911 --> 00:18:37,911
Oh. Yay! Yay!
329
00:18:42,511 --> 00:18:46,190
# You look so good
330
00:18:46,191 --> 00:18:50,191
# Fantastic man
331
00:18:57,711 --> 00:18:59,110
I'm drunk, Woods.
332
00:18:59,111 --> 00:19:03,111
I know you are. Don't be scared.
333
00:19:07,991 --> 00:19:11,991
Can you forgive me, Gary,
for what I just did a minute ago?
334
00:19:12,471 --> 00:19:14,030
Yeah, I suppose so,
335
00:19:14,031 --> 00:19:16,790
just sometimes just watch,
do you know what I mean?
336
00:19:16,791 --> 00:19:20,070
Because now the map's gone, innit?
I know.
337
00:19:20,071 --> 00:19:23,230
I'm dead sorry for getting physical
and verbally aggressive.
338
00:19:23,231 --> 00:19:25,150
I am very sorry for it. Here you are.
Hang on.
339
00:19:25,151 --> 00:19:27,950
There's summat smoking over there.
I think someone's broke down.
340
00:19:27,951 --> 00:19:30,590
What? Look. That's bad. Hang on.
341
00:19:30,591 --> 00:19:34,030
They might be ravers, though.
Could be. Could be.
342
00:19:34,031 --> 00:19:36,350
Might know where it is.
343
00:19:36,351 --> 00:19:40,351
Oh, what a stroke of luck!
Fuck's sake. Drive round.
344
00:19:40,391 --> 00:19:41,790
Help us. Just drive past.
345
00:19:41,791 --> 00:19:43,270
Stop.
346
00:19:43,271 --> 00:19:45,550
Oh, holy Jesus.
347
00:19:45,551 --> 00:19:47,830
Higgy, I know these people.
348
00:19:47,831 --> 00:19:50,630
Get out the car. Harvey.
How you doing?
349
00:19:50,631 --> 00:19:53,470
Oh, it's amazing to see you,
my friend.
350
00:19:53,471 --> 00:19:55,310
How are you?
351
00:19:55,311 --> 00:19:58,150
Better than your car. Gary. Hello.
352
00:19:58,151 --> 00:20:00,670
Hello, Kelly. Gadge.
You all right, mate?
353
00:20:00,671 --> 00:20:04,310
Is that boob juice you've got
all over your top there?
354
00:20:04,311 --> 00:20:06,190
Kelly,
355
00:20:06,191 --> 00:20:08,470
bless you, my child.
356
00:20:08,471 --> 00:20:11,950
Oh, for fuck's sake.
What are you doing here?
357
00:20:11,951 --> 00:20:13,830
I'm with my mates.
358
00:20:13,831 --> 00:20:16,270
If I had some metal now...
359
00:20:16,271 --> 00:20:17,750
Little bastard.
360
00:20:17,751 --> 00:20:21,310
You broke down, have you, Flip?
Well, you... Kind of.
361
00:20:21,311 --> 00:20:24,030
Well, it's more like just
cooling down a bit.
362
00:20:24,031 --> 00:20:27,110
It's heating up, mate, that.
It's bad.
363
00:20:27,111 --> 00:20:28,710
Well, it's a purring dragon.
364
00:20:28,711 --> 00:20:31,510
Sometimes he just needs to land,
365
00:20:31,511 --> 00:20:35,190
fold his wings and just calm down
a bit.
366
00:20:35,191 --> 00:20:38,230
So, where you going, Harv?
Where you going, Flip?
367
00:20:38,231 --> 00:20:41,470
Ah, to the rave up. Ah. Nice, yeah.
368
00:20:41,471 --> 00:20:43,710
Yeah, Higgy loves a rave,
don't you, Higgy?
369
00:20:43,711 --> 00:20:45,190
Guilty. Yeah.
370
00:20:45,191 --> 00:20:48,590
He was nearly in tears till
we saw you, yeah. Where is it?
371
00:20:48,591 --> 00:20:52,070
Nearly let him down. Same place
you're going. Where is it, though?
372
00:20:52,071 --> 00:20:54,190
Yeah, we'd have met there,
wouldn't we?
373
00:20:54,191 --> 00:20:56,430
You tell us where and we'll
come back, bring rescue.
374
00:20:56,431 --> 00:20:58,910
It's local, innit? But where?
375
00:20:58,911 --> 00:21:01,350
Oh, right. Do you not...
376
00:21:01,351 --> 00:21:04,430
Do you not know where you're going?
Yeah. Just it's...
377
00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:08,310
No, we don't, Flip. No, we ain't
got a clue, boss. Oh, right.
378
00:21:08,311 --> 00:21:09,830
Are you going to tell us?
379
00:21:09,831 --> 00:21:12,350
If I tell you where the rave is,
you're going to deny us a lift
380
00:21:12,351 --> 00:21:15,230
in that spastic wagon. Mate, we'll
get someone from the rave.
381
00:21:15,231 --> 00:21:16,870
Listen, listen, come on.
382
00:21:16,871 --> 00:21:19,510
There's no room.
We ain't not going to that rave.
383
00:21:19,511 --> 00:21:22,390
You shut up. We ain't not going.
384
00:21:22,391 --> 00:21:24,590
Just look at the ground.
Look at the ground.
385
00:21:24,591 --> 00:21:26,990
I'm in the front, mate. They can
fuck off if they think...
386
00:21:26,991 --> 00:21:29,430
One of yous is in the boot. Ginge.
No, fuck off, mate.
387
00:21:29,431 --> 00:21:31,790
I'm already in the back.
Shaun, you're smaller than me.
388
00:21:31,791 --> 00:21:35,791
You get in the boot, Shaun.
Come on, Shaun. No, mate.
389
00:21:36,231 --> 00:21:37,870
Harvey, make Shaun get in the boot.
390
00:21:37,871 --> 00:21:40,230
Carry on and you'll have
no fucking lift.
391
00:21:40,231 --> 00:21:42,230
Let me know when you get there,
yeah? Sarcasm.
392
00:21:42,231 --> 00:21:44,310
Oh, my God. Move up, that's right.
393
00:21:44,311 --> 00:21:45,630
Ow.
394
00:21:45,631 --> 00:21:47,231
You feel that in your side, Kelly?
395
00:21:47,232 --> 00:21:49,516
Everybody in? It's man log.
396
00:22:05,241 --> 00:22:08,141
You didn't know where it was,
did you, Flip?
397
00:22:08,238 --> 00:22:10,397
I thought I did, and...
398
00:22:10,398 --> 00:22:13,357
It wasn't a wind up, honest,
Harv, and...
399
00:22:13,358 --> 00:22:16,237
I wanted to take you to your rave
and...
400
00:22:16,238 --> 00:22:18,838
I feel like I've let
you all down.
401
00:22:18,838 --> 00:22:21,438
We didn't know were it was anyway,
boss, don't worry about it.
402
00:22:21,439 --> 00:22:24,317
That's very kind of you all, thanks.
403
00:22:24,318 --> 00:22:26,717
Shall we piss off then? Ugh! Mate!
404
00:22:26,718 --> 00:22:29,637
What else we going to do? There's no
point in going home to do nothing.
405
00:22:29,638 --> 00:22:31,917
We've got beer and that.
Stay in the fucking woods?
406
00:22:31,918 --> 00:22:34,637
Yeah, build a little fire
out of drift wood, we'll be f...
407
00:22:34,638 --> 00:22:37,957
There's no point driving all the way
back home to do fuck all, is there?
408
00:22:37,958 --> 00:22:39,877
Come on!
We've got our pills.
409
00:22:39,878 --> 00:22:41,677
Do you all really fancy it?
Yeah!
410
00:22:41,678 --> 00:22:44,997
Why not?
Whack some music on and that.
411
00:22:44,998 --> 00:22:47,037
Fuck it, we'll stay here then.
If you want, mate,
412
00:22:47,038 --> 00:22:50,997
I'll take you back to your car and
you can piss off and all.
413
00:22:50,998 --> 00:22:52,517
Well...
414
00:22:52,518 --> 00:22:54,717
I don't mind hanging
with you guys...
415
00:22:54,718 --> 00:22:56,957
and your party in the woods.
416
00:22:56,958 --> 00:22:59,197
Please don't take me back there,
Harvey.
417
00:22:59,198 --> 00:23:01,717
It's like American Werewolf
in Yorkshire out there.
418
00:23:01,718 --> 00:23:03,917
Truth is, mate, we ain't got enough
pills for you.
419
00:23:03,918 --> 00:23:06,997
Oh, we... we've bought pills to the
table, Harvey! Yeah!
420
00:23:06,998 --> 00:23:09,437
Pack of 30. Pack of 30 what?
421
00:23:09,438 --> 00:23:10,837
Pro Plus.
422
00:23:10,838 --> 00:23:13,477
Different thing, we've got
a completely different thing.
423
00:23:13,478 --> 00:23:15,717
Three or four
of them and you're up all night.
424
00:23:15,718 --> 00:23:17,518
Don't make us leave!
425
00:23:18,838 --> 00:23:22,357
Shit! How long's he been in there?!
Fuck knows, man. Fucking ages!
426
00:23:22,358 --> 00:23:24,078
Swore he was right here!
427
00:23:26,038 --> 00:23:28,357
Fucking hell, mate! Hig!
428
00:23:28,358 --> 00:23:32,358
All right, dude? Here he is!
429
00:23:33,038 --> 00:23:35,517
I'm fine, me brother used to lock me
in the cupboard,
430
00:23:35,518 --> 00:23:37,317
sometimes for hours
on end and that,
431
00:23:37,318 --> 00:23:39,677
so I'm quite good in small spaces.
Fair play to you.
432
00:23:39,678 --> 00:23:41,637
Happy times.
433
00:23:41,638 --> 00:23:42,917
Let us stay, mate?
434
00:23:42,918 --> 00:23:46,557
I promise I'll behave myself.
I'll keep these bad boys to myself.
435
00:23:46,558 --> 00:23:49,877
Fuck it, I feel really sorry for you
boys, but it ain't just up to me.
436
00:23:49,878 --> 00:23:51,597
That's the thing, like.
437
00:23:51,598 --> 00:23:55,077
You reckon?
438
00:23:55,078 --> 00:23:56,197
Come on, guys.
439
00:23:56,198 --> 00:23:58,957
Can't leave them on their own.
We can get a few in car.
440
00:23:58,958 --> 00:24:00,197
Go on, then. Fine!
441
00:24:00,198 --> 00:24:03,477
Let's get very happy, though.
You're in. Brilliant.
442
00:24:03,478 --> 00:24:05,917
Aww. That's really great of you.
Enjoy yourself.
443
00:24:05,918 --> 00:24:08,877
Have half of this, though. If it's
your first time, I'd have half.
444
00:24:08,878 --> 00:24:11,757
Lads, I'm pretty big,
and I feel I can handle a full one.
445
00:24:11,758 --> 00:24:13,597
Honestly, mate, I'm telling
you the truth.
446
00:24:13,598 --> 00:24:15,677
Just hang on, have half first.
447
00:24:15,678 --> 00:24:18,877
OK, I trust you, hombre.
I trust you guys.
448
00:24:18,878 --> 00:24:19,917
Thanks. Gadgy. Cheers.
449
00:24:19,918 --> 00:24:23,918
OK, Wow. Shaun, just have half with
me to start off with.
450
00:24:24,038 --> 00:24:26,877
I'll have less than half, mate.
Yeah, he needs less that half.
451
00:24:26,878 --> 00:24:29,478
Fuck off!
To the night, guys. To the night!
452
00:24:30,878 --> 00:24:33,637
Guys, here we go.
To the night in the woods.
453
00:24:33,638 --> 00:24:36,477
To a night in the woods! OK.
454
00:24:36,478 --> 00:24:40,478
Can I have a bit of that drink,
Trev? Before you, Ginge. Jesus.
455
00:24:41,198 --> 00:24:43,197
Have you just done yours
with out a drink?
456
00:24:43,198 --> 00:24:44,717
Oh, no, you still have it.
457
00:24:44,718 --> 00:24:46,597
It taste like fucking shite.
458
00:24:46,598 --> 00:24:49,317
Yeah, I'm not feeling anything,
Harvey. I can handle a full one.
459
00:24:49,318 --> 00:24:50,997
I promise you, give it time, mate.
460
00:24:50,998 --> 00:24:53,437
I'd say, half an hour at least,
and you'll be off your head.
461
00:24:53,438 --> 00:24:56,317
Brilliant. Shall I put some music
on, then? Yeah.
462
00:24:56,318 --> 00:24:59,157
The Ginger Ginge!
463
00:24:59,158 --> 00:25:00,997
Shall I put some Roses on? Yeah.
464
00:25:00,998 --> 00:25:02,477
Where about's are they, Harv?
465
00:25:02,478 --> 00:25:05,917
Down in floor, they were down near
my foot. Can't find it.
466
00:25:05,918 --> 00:25:07,917
Oh, hang on, mate.
467
00:25:07,918 --> 00:25:09,757
Is it the one with the red cover on?
468
00:25:09,758 --> 00:25:12,918
Hang on, hang on. Shh, shh, shh.
Wait, listen. Can you hear that?
469
00:25:14,198 --> 00:25:17,757
It's, like, drumming or something.
470
00:25:17,758 --> 00:25:20,477
I can hear that, Trev.
We've found it, haven't it?
471
00:25:20,478 --> 00:25:21,838
Fuck!
472
00:25:24,358 --> 00:25:26,917
Ladies and gentlemen....
Fucking hell, boys and girls.
473
00:25:26,918 --> 00:25:28,837
We're fucking here!
474
00:25:28,838 --> 00:25:30,158
FUCK YES!
475
00:25:31,798 --> 00:25:35,237
Beautiful, man! I told you
I'd take you there!
476
00:25:35,238 --> 00:25:36,278
I told you!
477
00:25:47,118 --> 00:25:48,198
Let's do this!
478
00:25:51,118 --> 00:25:53,597
What the fuck?!
479
00:25:53,598 --> 00:25:55,237
That's not it, is it?
480
00:25:55,238 --> 00:25:57,837
There's nowhere near 2,000 there,
mate.
481
00:25:57,838 --> 00:26:00,397
Is that a wigwam?
482
00:26:00,398 --> 00:26:03,317
This definitely isn't it.
483
00:26:03,318 --> 00:26:04,837
Looks like a fucking seance!
484
00:26:04,838 --> 00:26:06,717
Well, a party's, a party, isn't it?
485
00:26:06,718 --> 00:26:09,037
Yeah, but,
we can't all go in there like this,
486
00:26:09,038 --> 00:26:11,597
we'll stand out like a sore thumb!
Has she got her tits out?
487
00:26:11,598 --> 00:26:13,997
What? Loads of tits out, mate.
488
00:26:13,998 --> 00:26:15,837
Yeah, some are nice.
489
00:26:15,838 --> 00:26:18,597
Some are not so nice and long.
490
00:26:18,598 --> 00:26:20,677
Jesus. Free tits, Harv!
491
00:26:20,678 --> 00:26:23,838
Do you reckon we have it or what?
Fuck it, I'll suck anything!
492
00:26:25,518 --> 00:26:27,077
Come on, then!
493
00:26:27,078 --> 00:26:28,478
Party!
494
00:26:43,958 --> 00:26:45,357
She's pissed!
495
00:26:45,358 --> 00:26:47,077
Fucking hell!
496
00:26:47,078 --> 00:26:49,317
Groovy shirt, man! Yeah!
497
00:26:49,318 --> 00:26:51,917
Can I touch your stuff?
She's got her tits out!
498
00:26:51,918 --> 00:26:53,877
Please let me touch you tits.
499
00:26:53,878 --> 00:26:55,197
This bit. Just this bit.
500
00:26:55,198 --> 00:26:58,157
Don't touch her, Gadge, she'll chop
your hand off! Chop your hand off.
501
00:26:58,158 --> 00:26:59,597
I want to touch it...
502
00:26:59,598 --> 00:27:02,557
'Do you really want to jump?
Do you want to?
503
00:27:02,558 --> 00:27:05,557
'Well, that's fine with me.
Come on. Let's do it, asshole.
504
00:27:05,558 --> 00:27:08,637
'Wait a minute! Wha... I want to do
it. Wait... What do you mean?!
505
00:27:08,638 --> 00:27:10,198
'Oh!'
506
00:27:23,998 --> 00:27:25,758
Get it. No way. Go on.
507
00:27:27,198 --> 00:27:29,237
I'm just too tired, I am, Lol.
508
00:27:29,238 --> 00:27:31,797
Get the phone, Woody.
No, it's me mum and dad.
509
00:27:31,798 --> 00:27:33,397
Yeah, of course it's your
mum and dad.
510
00:27:33,398 --> 00:27:34,878
No, I've had enough of them now.
511
00:27:36,438 --> 00:27:38,998
Woody, get the phone. I'm not
talking to your mum for an hour.
512
00:27:42,438 --> 00:27:46,438
Hello?
513
00:27:47,598 --> 00:27:49,917
Yeah...
514
00:27:49,918 --> 00:27:53,918
Right, let me just nip upstairs
and I'll take the phone up there.
515
00:27:54,358 --> 00:27:56,917
All right, just one sec.
516
00:27:56,918 --> 00:27:58,957
Right, Woody, it's me mum. Mm.
517
00:27:58,958 --> 00:28:01,837
When I shout, put the phone down.
Are you listening? Mm-hm. Yeah?
518
00:28:01,838 --> 00:28:05,838
Yeah? Yes.
519
00:28:12,078 --> 00:28:14,917
Right, put it down then, Wood.
520
00:28:14,918 --> 00:28:16,198
Woody!
521
00:28:17,238 --> 00:28:19,917
Quick. I'm doing it!
522
00:28:19,918 --> 00:28:23,918
It's down.
523
00:28:25,598 --> 00:28:28,677
Hi, you all right?
524
00:28:28,678 --> 00:28:32,557
No. Milky's here,
so I couldn't talk.
525
00:28:32,558 --> 00:28:35,517
Come on, then, what's up?
526
00:28:35,518 --> 00:28:37,317
You sound really stressed.
527
00:28:37,318 --> 00:28:38,998
Tell me what's up, Combo.
528
00:29:27,878 --> 00:29:29,878
Are you having a nice time?
I like this.
529
00:29:36,518 --> 00:29:39,477
This is great. This is great.
530
00:29:39,478 --> 00:29:41,198
I love ecstasy!
531
00:29:54,078 --> 00:29:57,918
Is it too soon to say that I think
I might love you?
532
00:30:34,918 --> 00:30:36,678
That's amazing.
533
00:31:51,638 --> 00:31:53,757
Hello! Hiya. How are you?
534
00:31:53,758 --> 00:31:56,157
I'm good, thanks. How are you?
I'm very good.
535
00:31:56,158 --> 00:31:57,677
Do you want to come in?
536
00:31:57,678 --> 00:32:01,037
I'd... I'd love to,
and to be invited, it's special.
537
00:32:01,038 --> 00:32:03,517
Come in!
538
00:32:03,518 --> 00:32:07,518
Oh, yeah.
539
00:32:08,558 --> 00:32:11,317
It's gone a bit mental
out there, hasn't it? Yeah.
540
00:32:11,318 --> 00:32:13,957
Mmm. It's good, though! Yeah, it is.
541
00:32:13,958 --> 00:32:17,037
It's very ni...
It's nice out there, isn't it?
542
00:32:17,038 --> 00:32:19,917
Yeah. Just everyone....
543
00:32:19,918 --> 00:32:21,557
Just happy, like.
544
00:32:21,558 --> 00:32:25,558
Yeah, just doing what
they need to do. Yeah.
545
00:32:26,118 --> 00:32:29,197
You coming in for a bit of quiet?
Well... Well...
546
00:32:29,198 --> 00:32:33,077
I won't lie to you, I was...
I was going past for a piss.
547
00:32:33,078 --> 00:32:36,477
Yeah. I was going past for a wee.
Excuse me.
548
00:32:36,478 --> 00:32:39,917
Gadg! Give us a beer, my friend.
For, you mate.
549
00:32:39,918 --> 00:32:42,437
Do you know what? I love you.
This is fucking nice, this.
550
00:32:42,438 --> 00:32:44,958
I know. I know, it's wonderful.
You all right?
551
00:32:46,158 --> 00:32:48,037
Love you, mate!
552
00:32:48,038 --> 00:32:51,597
Yeah, it's... It's special here,
like, it's so different you know,
553
00:32:51,598 --> 00:32:53,397
to anything else. Yeah.
554
00:32:53,398 --> 00:32:55,597
'If you would kindly tell me
555
00:32:55,598 --> 00:32:59,598
'everything you know, I promise
I'll kill you quick.'
556
00:33:00,678 --> 00:33:04,678
'I've told
you everything I know.'
557
00:33:06,398 --> 00:33:08,797
Wood?
558
00:33:08,798 --> 00:33:10,837
Woody?
559
00:33:10,838 --> 00:33:13,038
Woody? Ungh!
560
00:33:28,598 --> 00:33:32,437
So, like, I know it's rude to ask,
and I shouldn't,
561
00:33:32,438 --> 00:33:36,037
but can I ask how old are you are?
562
00:33:36,038 --> 00:33:37,477
I'm 47.
563
00:33:37,478 --> 00:33:38,957
47? Mm.
564
00:33:38,958 --> 00:33:42,958
Wow. You're literally,
like, five years older than my dad.
565
00:33:45,118 --> 00:33:47,637
I know... I didn't'
mean any offence, like...
566
00:33:47,638 --> 00:33:50,237
I don't take any offence!
No, no offence. Yeah.
567
00:33:50,238 --> 00:33:51,837
But...
568
00:33:51,838 --> 00:33:55,277
Like... Do you get on with your dad?
569
00:33:55,278 --> 00:33:57,317
I di... I di... Yeah.
570
00:33:57,318 --> 00:33:59,917
Course, yeah.
I fucking love him to bits.
571
00:33:59,918 --> 00:34:02,317
But he's not here anymore,
he passed away.
572
00:34:02,318 --> 00:34:03,757
Aww, I'm sorry to hear that.
573
00:34:03,758 --> 00:34:07,758
It happens, like, it happens.
My dad was... He was a fighter
574
00:34:07,918 --> 00:34:11,197
in the war and he bought me
up a fighter.
575
00:34:11,198 --> 00:34:14,117
You know, like,
he was one of them that...
576
00:34:14,118 --> 00:34:16,597
Like, I know he can see me now,
like he's looking from
577
00:34:16,598 --> 00:34:19,117
above and he's looking
at me and you.
578
00:34:19,118 --> 00:34:22,557
He's thinking, "Fucking go on, boy,"
that's what he's thinking.
579
00:34:22,558 --> 00:34:25,037
And he was a fighter, and that's
what I've always had in me,
580
00:34:25,038 --> 00:34:26,717
and he was a brave man. Yeah.
581
00:34:26,718 --> 00:34:29,557
Like, he fought for the country,
he fought in the Falklands and...
582
00:34:29,558 --> 00:34:32,597
He was just a brave man, and
that's what he brought me up to be,
583
00:34:32,598 --> 00:34:35,197
and if he'd have been
looking down on me now,
584
00:34:35,198 --> 00:34:39,198
if I was sat here, laying down there
crying, he'd look at me and he'd go,
585
00:34:39,318 --> 00:34:43,157
"Shaun, fucking hell. Sort it out.
What you doing what you crying for?
586
00:34:43,158 --> 00:34:46,477
"Crying's not going to bring
me back." It doesn't, you know?
587
00:34:46,478 --> 00:34:48,757
But if he'd have seen me down here,
588
00:34:48,758 --> 00:34:51,878
you know, having the time of me
life and sat here having fun...
589
00:34:53,438 --> 00:34:56,157
He'd be, like I say, he'd be sat
there going, "Fucking, Shaun,
590
00:34:56,158 --> 00:34:59,437
"love you to bits, mate." Yeah.
So he's with you all the time.
591
00:34:59,438 --> 00:35:03,317
All the time, all the time. But...
592
00:35:03,318 --> 00:35:05,917
And how old where you
when he passed?
593
00:35:05,918 --> 00:35:09,918
I would have been 11, 12.
Oh, right! Young. Yeah.
594
00:35:10,078 --> 00:35:11,837
I was young, and er, like...
595
00:35:11,838 --> 00:35:15,838
I understand death at that age,
obviously, but... Yeah.
596
00:35:17,438 --> 00:35:19,237
It's just one of them things,
isn't it?
597
00:35:19,238 --> 00:35:21,517
There's nothing you can do
about it. No.
598
00:35:21,518 --> 00:35:23,517
But you miss him?
599
00:35:23,518 --> 00:35:27,518
Yeah, obviously. Yeah.
600
00:36:32,558 --> 00:36:35,957
There you are.
601
00:36:35,958 --> 00:36:38,437
Are you OK?
602
00:36:38,438 --> 00:36:42,438
Are you all right?
603
00:36:42,798 --> 00:36:44,718
Are you OK?
604
00:40:09,278 --> 00:40:11,638
I love you so
much. You know that?
605
00:40:13,398 --> 00:40:15,717
I love you so much.
So much.
606
00:40:15,718 --> 00:40:17,197
I love you so much.
607
00:40:17,198 --> 00:40:19,637
You know that?
I love you so much. You know that?
608
00:40:19,638 --> 00:40:20,998
I love you so much.
609
00:40:22,918 --> 00:40:25,277
Dad?
610
00:40:25,278 --> 00:40:26,718
Dad...
611
00:41:41,505 --> 00:41:43,205
Morning. Where have you been?
612
00:41:43,256 --> 00:41:45,776
Fucking down there on couch
with him.
613
00:41:45,861 --> 00:41:49,861
Why? Because you didn't
wake me up, you bastard!
614
00:41:52,101 --> 00:41:54,060
Fucking hell!
615
00:41:54,061 --> 00:41:56,501
Is he still down there?
Of course he's still there.
616
00:41:56,501 --> 00:41:59,540
He's like a turd that won't flush.
617
00:41:59,541 --> 00:42:02,741
That's all the food gone, then.
I've hid it.
618
00:42:02,741 --> 00:42:04,940
Where? In the tumble drier.
619
00:42:04,941 --> 00:42:07,500
Ew! Won't want to eat that now.
620
00:42:07,501 --> 00:42:09,660
It's the only place
he won't think to look.
621
00:42:09,661 --> 00:42:13,661
He will. He'll sniff it out.
622
00:42:14,221 --> 00:42:16,860
Is your mum all right?
623
00:42:16,861 --> 00:42:20,861
Yeah, why? She rang last night.
I thought maybe...
624
00:42:21,061 --> 00:42:25,061
Maybe Nikki had got her dildo stuck
all the way up inside her.
625
00:42:26,941 --> 00:42:29,060
No. Was trying to spoon it out.
626
00:42:29,061 --> 00:42:33,061
Oh, Woody, don't! Don't!
You're disgusting.
627
00:42:33,381 --> 00:42:34,941
I'm sorry.
628
00:42:34,941 --> 00:42:37,981
No, it weren't my mum on the phone.
It was Combo.
629
00:42:37,982 --> 00:42:41,020
Oh, fucking hell.
630
00:42:41,021 --> 00:42:42,620
Is he all right?
631
00:42:42,621 --> 00:42:46,500
No, not really. Is he not? No.
632
00:42:46,501 --> 00:42:49,620
He was a bit... bit teary, to be
honest.
633
00:42:49,621 --> 00:42:52,220
Teary? Yeah. Was he?
634
00:42:52,221 --> 00:42:56,221
Well, he's... he's trying to get
out, isn't he? Mm. Yeah.
635
00:42:56,581 --> 00:42:59,740
Only it didn't go very well
last time and,
636
00:42:59,741 --> 00:43:02,620
well, he was telling me about all
this stuff that he's got to get
637
00:43:02,621 --> 00:43:06,621
together and, you know, what they
expect of him if he gets parole....
638
00:43:07,661 --> 00:43:11,060
Go on, I can feel something.
639
00:43:11,061 --> 00:43:13,701
Yeah. Come on, then.
640
00:43:13,701 --> 00:43:17,701
Well, he needs stability,
he needs people for when he's out
641
00:43:19,101 --> 00:43:22,060
cos he hasn't got anyone,
so he's obviously got...
642
00:43:22,061 --> 00:43:23,620
Drop the bomb. Let's have the bomb.
643
00:43:23,621 --> 00:43:25,300
He needs somewhere to live.
644
00:43:25,301 --> 00:43:29,301
There it is. There it is.
645
00:43:30,061 --> 00:43:32,501
Well, we got a year of happiness.
646
00:43:33,941 --> 00:43:35,660
Didn't we? Fucking hell.
647
00:43:35,661 --> 00:43:38,700
Well, I've said... I've not said,
like, defo yes...
648
00:43:38,701 --> 00:43:42,420
I've said I'd talk to you about it.
Of course.
649
00:43:42,421 --> 00:43:45,180
Of course he's going to have to
stay here. What do you mean?
650
00:43:45,181 --> 00:43:48,180
He's going to have to stay here,
of course he is. Lollipop...
651
00:43:48,181 --> 00:43:51,740
You wouldn't mind Combo moving in?
No.
652
00:43:51,741 --> 00:43:54,900
It's going to be messy,
but I think... Well...
653
00:43:54,901 --> 00:43:58,901
I wouldn't have a son, would I?
I wouldn't have Jimmy...
654
00:43:59,461 --> 00:44:03,300
..I wouldn't have the love
of my life...
655
00:44:03,301 --> 00:44:04,860
..without what that man did,
656
00:44:04,861 --> 00:44:07,220
so of course he's going to have to
stay here.
657
00:44:07,221 --> 00:44:09,980
Do you know what?
He might not even get out.
658
00:44:09,981 --> 00:44:12,820
They might not even accept it, so
it might not even be a problem.
659
00:44:12,821 --> 00:44:14,260
But if there's more of a chance...
660
00:44:14,261 --> 00:44:16,980
If it's going to
improve his chances of getting out,
661
00:44:16,981 --> 00:44:19,460
then of course he's going to
have to stay here.
662
00:44:19,461 --> 00:44:22,380
Oh, God. It's going to be...
Mm. Terrible.
663
00:44:22,381 --> 00:44:24,180
..a fucking nightmare, Woody.
664
00:44:24,181 --> 00:44:27,460
Yeah, all right, but it's not...
We've been through worse, haven't we?
665
00:44:27,461 --> 00:44:29,740
Let's not...
They're going to hate me. No!
666
00:44:29,741 --> 00:44:33,741
They're going to just hate me again.
No, no, no! I don't think so.
667
00:44:34,981 --> 00:44:38,500
Oh, God!
It makes me feel sick, Wood.
668
00:44:38,501 --> 00:44:40,900
Really makes me feel genuinely
like... That's not cool.
669
00:44:40,901 --> 00:44:43,980
Have a little time on me...
670
00:44:43,981 --> 00:44:47,140
..on me chest-aroo.
Oh, that's better.
671
00:44:47,141 --> 00:44:50,740
Oh, Christ, I love you.
It's ridiculous, do you know that?
672
00:44:50,741 --> 00:44:54,741
Thanks, Wood. You're the best.
673
00:45:38,701 --> 00:45:42,701
Oh, man!
674
00:46:04,821 --> 00:46:08,821
Oi!
675
00:46:09,581 --> 00:46:11,101
Ah!
676
00:46:12,141 --> 00:46:16,141
The fuck you doing out here?
677
00:46:16,301 --> 00:46:20,301
Just looking at this.
678
00:46:21,181 --> 00:46:24,020
It's beautiful, isn't it?
679
00:46:24,021 --> 00:46:27,220
Yeah.
680
00:46:27,221 --> 00:46:31,221
Better that what we have back home,
isn't it?
681
00:46:32,301 --> 00:46:35,340
If someone, like, from Africa,
682
00:46:35,341 --> 00:46:39,341
who'd never been to England,
and they had to draw a picture,
683
00:46:39,581 --> 00:46:43,581
this is exactly what they'd draw.
684
00:46:52,181 --> 00:46:56,181
A mad one last night, wasn't it?
685
00:46:56,381 --> 00:47:00,381
Mm, crazy. Yeah, it got a bit crazy.
686
00:47:03,661 --> 00:47:07,661
What happened to you?
I didn't see much of you.
687
00:47:08,461 --> 00:47:12,461
Just... around, really.
688
00:47:16,221 --> 00:47:20,221
Cop off?
689
00:47:21,701 --> 00:47:25,701
Little bit, mate, yeah.
690
00:47:28,101 --> 00:47:30,861
The guy with the flaming whip,
was it?
691
00:47:31,901 --> 00:47:35,740
Yeah. Was it, er, one of
the topless ladies this time?
692
00:47:35,741 --> 00:47:36,781
You wish.
693
00:47:46,941 --> 00:47:48,420
You all right?
694
00:47:48,421 --> 00:47:50,620
Mm.
695
00:47:50,621 --> 00:47:52,460
No, you're not.
696
00:47:52,461 --> 00:47:56,461
I am, Gadg.
697
00:47:56,581 --> 00:47:59,140
Are you OK?
698
00:47:59,141 --> 00:48:03,141
Yeah. No, Kelly, come here,
come here.
699
00:48:06,261 --> 00:48:08,220
I'm fine. It's fine.
700
00:48:08,221 --> 00:48:11,300
No, it's not, come here.
What's up with you?
701
00:48:11,301 --> 00:48:15,301
Kel, look at me. Look at me.
702
00:48:16,341 --> 00:48:20,341
What's up with you?
I'm all right. What's up?
703
00:48:21,221 --> 00:48:23,340
I don't want to talk about it,
to be honest.
704
00:48:23,341 --> 00:48:24,780
Come on, what's up?
705
00:48:24,781 --> 00:48:27,940
Come here, what's up with you?
706
00:48:27,941 --> 00:48:30,340
Don't cry.
707
00:48:30,341 --> 00:48:34,341
I'm a fucking slag, Gadget!
708
00:48:37,501 --> 00:48:38,900
What you saying that for?
709
00:48:38,901 --> 00:48:42,901
Cos I am.
710
00:48:51,101 --> 00:48:55,101
Hey, look at me.
711
00:48:55,261 --> 00:48:59,261
You're not a slag.
712
00:49:07,741 --> 00:49:11,741
No fucker's hurt you, have they?
713
00:49:14,301 --> 00:49:18,301
If any fucker's hurt you,
tell me now.
714
00:49:20,501 --> 00:49:23,701
No. Are you sure?
715
00:49:23,701 --> 00:49:27,701
Just do what I fucking want, Gadg,
that's the fucking problem.
716
00:49:30,901 --> 00:49:34,901
Please don't say that, please.
717
00:49:50,501 --> 00:49:51,940
Love you, babe.
718
00:49:51,941 --> 00:49:55,941
Fucking love you. You know
that as well, don't you?
719
00:49:59,461 --> 00:50:02,906
I always fucking have done,
haven't I? Eh?
720
00:50:05,906 --> 00:50:09,906
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56014
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