All language subtitles for Rubin.And.Ed.1991.720p.BluRay.x264.AAC-[YTS.MX].ENG
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"Rubin & Ed"
Subtitles by Magiin. August 2020.
4
00:01:04,080 --> 00:01:08,190
Are you willing to open the door
to your dreams?
5
00:01:09,920 --> 00:01:12,430
Success!
- Success!
6
00:01:13,790 --> 00:01:15,260
Why do we want that success?
7
00:01:18,300 --> 00:01:21,000
Money!
- Money!
8
00:01:22,740 --> 00:01:24,400
How do we get that money?
9
00:01:26,080 --> 00:01:27,150
Work!
10
00:01:29,200 --> 00:01:31,720
No, no, not work...
11
00:01:33,260 --> 00:01:36,190
Real estate!
- Real estate!
12
00:01:36,510 --> 00:01:42,710
Power through positive real estate!
The P-P-R! The organization!
13
00:01:43,230 --> 00:01:45,680
Yay!
14
00:01:48,150 --> 00:01:53,460
Do you have what it takes? Are you the kind
of high caliber motivated professional...
15
00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:54,910
that will stop at nothing
to get what you want?
16
00:01:57,540 --> 00:02:00,780
Who are you?
Who are you?
17
00:02:03,270 --> 00:02:07,160
You are an incredibly powerful
sales person who continually
18
00:02:07,190 --> 00:02:10,430
climbs higher and higher
up the ladder of success.
19
00:02:10,670 --> 00:02:15,430
Chant after me: "I am an
incredibly powerful sales person who
20
00:02:15,460 --> 00:02:20,460
continually climbs higher and
higher up the ladder of success!"
21
00:02:20,530 --> 00:02:24,600
"I am an incredibly powerful
sales person who continually
22
00:02:24,630 --> 00:02:28,340
climbs higher and higher
up the ladder of success!"
23
00:02:28,770 --> 00:02:34,080
"I am an incredibly powerful
sales person who continually
24
00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:37,860
climbs higher and higher
up the ladder of success!"
25
00:02:37,940 --> 00:02:41,320
Success!
- Success!
26
00:02:45,850 --> 00:02:48,260
Boy that Mr. Busta sure can give a speech, can't he?
27
00:02:54,280 --> 00:03:00,350
Now chant along with me: I am an incredibly
powerful sales person who continually
28
00:03:00,350 --> 00:03:02,870
climbs higher and higher
up the ladder of success...
29
00:04:02,350 --> 00:04:02,910
Wow!
30
00:04:52,920 --> 00:04:56,280
Rubin! Stop squeaking that stupid mouse!
31
00:04:59,400 --> 00:05:02,310
I said stop squeaking
that stupid mouse!
32
00:05:07,570 --> 00:05:10,620
Why don't you do something
else for a change. Why don't
33
00:05:10,650 --> 00:05:13,590
you get out of this house
and make yourself a friend!
34
00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:14,600
No!
- Yes!
35
00:05:14,600 --> 00:05:17,410
No!
- Well then take out the trash.
36
00:05:26,010 --> 00:05:29,830
Hey weirdo! Who let you out!
Here kitty, kitty, kitty...
37
00:05:31,030 --> 00:05:33,930
Come 'n get me!
Ha ha ha!
38
00:05:34,700 --> 00:05:37,980
Here kitty, kitty, kitty...
Here kitty, kitty...
39
00:05:51,400 --> 00:05:57,680
- Hello?
Hello Rula this Ed... hi, hi... hello.
40
00:05:58,000 --> 00:06:02,000
Uh I hadn't called for a while so I thought
I'd call and say... hello.
41
00:06:02,480 --> 00:06:05,210
Exercise Ed.
- Oh no, Rula, please.
42
00:06:05,620 --> 00:06:08,110
You know why you feel
better when you exercise, Ed?
43
00:06:08,140 --> 00:06:11,010
Because you're doing something
you don't really want to do.
44
00:06:11,490 --> 00:06:12,670
I know, I know.
45
00:06:12,770 --> 00:06:17,660
You're paid in life for doing what
you don't really want to do, Ed.
46
00:06:18,680 --> 00:06:19,810
I know... I know.
47
00:06:20,070 --> 00:06:23,910
You always do exactly
what you want to do, Ed.
48
00:06:23,940 --> 00:06:25,980
That's why you're broke.
49
00:06:26,060 --> 00:06:31,290
Ya know, Rula... I uh... I haven't
talked to you in quite a while.
50
00:06:31,310 --> 00:06:33,060
How are you doing?
51
00:06:33,310 --> 00:06:34,740
Great!
- Really?
52
00:06:36,190 --> 00:06:39,840
Well that's great. I'm great
too. I mean I'm doing great.
53
00:06:39,860 --> 00:06:42,570
Just, things are
going great for me uh...
54
00:06:43,150 --> 00:06:48,940
Gotta go now, Ed.
- Well, ok! No problem. Listen it's been...
55
00:06:58,890 --> 00:07:01,340
Woof! Bark, bark, bark!...
56
00:07:16,790 --> 00:07:20,290
That's it! No more
Mahler.
Not another note until you
57
00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:23,110
get out of this house
and make a friend!
58
00:07:23,120 --> 00:07:24,880
No!
- Yes!
59
00:07:26,040 --> 00:07:30,720
It's for your own good, Rubin. You can't
stay in this house the rest of your life.
60
00:07:30,840 --> 00:07:32,740
Yes I can!
- No you can't!
61
00:07:33,070 --> 00:07:35,370
Why?
- Because
I said so!
62
00:07:35,630 --> 00:07:38,190
Now go out and make yourself a
friend. Bring him home to dinner and
63
00:07:38,220 --> 00:07:39,500
I'll give you your music back!
64
00:07:40,420 --> 00:07:42,730
No friend, no music!
65
00:08:05,480 --> 00:08:07,080
I want you to meet my mother.
66
00:08:13,190 --> 00:08:14,630
Excuse me.
- Buzz off.
67
00:08:18,240 --> 00:08:19,690
Excuse me.
- No.
68
00:08:21,460 --> 00:08:22,110
Excuse me...
69
00:08:23,320 --> 00:08:26,000
Excuse me... hi, uh...
- Grrr!
70
00:08:34,050 --> 00:08:37,830
Excuse me. My name is Ed.
Who are you - who are you really?
71
00:08:39,120 --> 00:08:42,730
I'm making a survey for Power
Through Positive Real Estate...
72
00:08:42,750 --> 00:08:44,550
may I ask you a few questions?
73
00:08:49,580 --> 00:08:55,300
Are you 100% satisifed with your
earning potential 100% of the time?
74
00:08:56,380 --> 00:08:59,020
Yep!
- You are...?
75
00:09:00,090 --> 00:09:05,300
Are you 100% satisfied with your
life and or outside relationships?
76
00:09:05,550 --> 00:09:08,010
Yep!
- Really?
77
00:09:08,590 --> 00:09:14,760
Uh... If the answer to any of these
questions is not 100% yes...
78
00:09:14,780 --> 00:09:18,720
then come with me right now
for a free introductory seminar on
79
00:09:18,750 --> 00:09:21,060
Power Through
Positive Real Estate!
80
00:09:23,470 --> 00:09:29,430
Uh... I could go around dinner time?
Come over my house? Pick me up?
81
00:09:29,450 --> 00:09:32,650
I think that could be arranged... and
your name and address please?
82
00:09:33,160 --> 00:09:38,190
Rubin Farr. Fontenoy Inn.
Room 71.
83
00:09:38,570 --> 00:09:41,650
Motel?
- My mother's the manager.
84
00:09:42,410 --> 00:09:47,360
Very well then Mr. Rubin Farr
of the Fontenoy Inn, Room... 71.
85
00:09:49,110 --> 00:09:52,140
Your life... is about to take
a positive turn!
86
00:09:53,880 --> 00:09:56,060
I'll pick you up at 6.
87
00:10:04,070 --> 00:10:04,860
Got one!
88
00:10:10,620 --> 00:10:15,820
Enthusiasm!
Hello... how ya doing?! Hi.
89
00:10:33,220 --> 00:10:38,110
Hello Rubin! What a tremendous day.
A fantastic day for real estate!
90
00:10:38,300 --> 00:10:41,710
What say we motor on over to
the seminar and get you started
91
00:10:41,730 --> 00:10:43,410
on the "Express to Success"?
92
00:10:44,070 --> 00:10:48,890
Nope. My mother's not here yet.
You need to meet my mother.
93
00:11:15,210 --> 00:11:16,460
Quite a living room...
94
00:11:22,230 --> 00:11:23,400
Quite a squeaky mouse.
95
00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:44,530
Could I have a glass of water?
- No!
96
00:11:50,990 --> 00:11:54,360
Actually I better be going.
- Wait, wait, wait, wait!...
97
00:11:54,900 --> 00:11:57,120
Come on in the kitchen and have
a glass of water.
98
00:12:04,110 --> 00:12:05,510
This is quite a kitchen!
99
00:12:14,050 --> 00:12:15,780
Ice! Ice is nice...
100
00:12:23,470 --> 00:12:28,390
Ahhh!
...Good Lord, what the hell?!
101
00:12:30,380 --> 00:12:35,240
I'm sorry, uh I wanted some ice.
I didn't realize... look...
102
00:12:35,710 --> 00:12:37,240
I didn't do it.
103
00:12:40,680 --> 00:12:43,370
Why don't you keep your hands off
other people's refrigerators?!
104
00:12:49,060 --> 00:12:54,080
Listen you don't eat those things, do ya?
Because I could get sick eating cats.
105
00:12:54,390 --> 00:12:55,910
It's a pet!
106
00:13:04,110 --> 00:13:08,440
I know it's none of my business, but why do
you keep your pet in the freezer?
107
00:13:09,270 --> 00:13:12,380
I'm keeping him frozen until I find the
right spot to bury him.
108
00:13:12,990 --> 00:13:15,870
Look, my mother just
called, she's going to be late.
109
00:13:15,890 --> 00:13:18,280
I don't feel like going
to the seminar now.
110
00:13:18,990 --> 00:13:21,600
In your frame of mind, I think the seminar
would be very good.
111
00:13:21,840 --> 00:13:22,930
No!
112
00:13:23,080 --> 00:13:25,550
Well look, tell you what.
We'll leave my business card,
113
00:13:25,580 --> 00:13:28,780
right here on the table that way
your mother will know where you went.
114
00:13:28,800 --> 00:13:29,400
No!
115
00:13:29,470 --> 00:13:31,640
I drove all the way over here, I think the
least you can do...
116
00:13:31,680 --> 00:13:33,000
Shut up!
117
00:13:34,530 --> 00:13:38,150
You shut up you son of a bitch!
I'm sorry I didn't mean that...
118
00:13:38,290 --> 00:13:40,300
Excuse me, I did not mean it.
119
00:13:46,430 --> 00:13:50,000
I guess you're pretty broken up
about your cat?
120
00:13:50,300 --> 00:13:52,750
You had him for a long time?
- Yes.
121
00:13:54,190 --> 00:13:58,430
Let's see, where could you bury him?
Don't have a yard so that's out.
122
00:13:59,670 --> 00:14:01,110
Why don't you bury your cat at sea?
123
00:14:02,070 --> 00:14:04,670
Cat's hate water.
- Well then we'll bury him out in the desert.
124
00:14:04,670 --> 00:14:06,560
No car.
- Well then just get over it!
125
00:14:06,650 --> 00:14:08,550
I mean, go on to the next step.
126
00:14:08,680 --> 00:14:11,770
Set a goal, and obstacles
become opportunities!
127
00:14:12,330 --> 00:14:14,880
Man you really need that seminar right now!
Let's go over there...
128
00:14:14,880 --> 00:14:17,470
Get out of my house!
129
00:14:17,470 --> 00:14:20,130
You know you really are an asswipe!
130
00:14:20,130 --> 00:14:22,930
Sorry. I didn't mean that either.
I didn't mean to say that.
131
00:14:23,150 --> 00:14:26,630
You have a car? You dropped my cat?
- Hmm?
132
00:14:26,630 --> 00:14:31,100
You have a car.
- Yeah. Well... we go to the seminar first,
133
00:14:31,120 --> 00:14:32,810
and then we bury your cat.
134
00:14:32,810 --> 00:14:35,000
He'll defrost.
- Pack him in ice.
135
00:14:37,250 --> 00:14:38,890
...That's a good idea, Ed.
136
00:14:41,380 --> 00:14:43,030
I'll go get the cooler.
137
00:14:50,370 --> 00:14:54,300
This car belongs to the organization.
Pretty nice, eh?
138
00:14:54,930 --> 00:14:58,050
They let me borrow it
especially for this.
139
00:15:03,140 --> 00:15:06,620
Hey! Uh, I'll drive.
Hey! What are you doing?! Hey!
140
00:15:06,720 --> 00:15:08,420
Open the door!
Open!
141
00:15:08,910 --> 00:15:11,450
Alright! This is an official car!
142
00:15:12,880 --> 00:15:14,330
No, no, no!
143
00:15:15,230 --> 00:15:16,720
What do you think you're doing?!
144
00:15:24,600 --> 00:15:26,110
Turn right.
Turn right!
145
00:15:28,640 --> 00:15:29,950
Ok, uh, turn left!
146
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:35,890
Great. You're not really going to the
seminar, are you?
147
00:15:35,910 --> 00:15:37,810
I'm not stupid, I know what you're up to!
148
00:15:37,810 --> 00:15:40,580
We have to be back before
10 o'clock, ok?. We have to be...
149
00:15:40,600 --> 00:15:42,260
back before the seminar's over.
150
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:53,980
I don't mind your driving, less work for
me if you do. I hate driving.
151
00:15:55,730 --> 00:15:58,390
Just works out that it's less work for me,
more for you. You know what is...
152
00:15:59,310 --> 00:16:03,120
really sad is that you don't realize
what you're missing.
153
00:16:03,330 --> 00:16:06,310
You have the potential to be
rich, you know?
154
00:16:07,410 --> 00:16:10,230
You know the number one difference
between you and a rich man?
155
00:16:10,990 --> 00:16:12,980
He has money and you don't.
156
00:16:13,190 --> 00:16:17,260
If you're smart, you'd ask
yourself, "why?".
157
00:16:19,410 --> 00:16:24,310
What is the matter with you anyway?
I mean, don't you want to be a success?
158
00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:29,240
I tell you, the difference between
a guy like me and a guy like you...
159
00:16:29,260 --> 00:16:31,110
is that I've learned
from my mistakes.
160
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:36,610
I used to be really messed up. You know,
I had a bad temper, the seminar...
161
00:16:36,610 --> 00:16:37,500
taught me how to control it.
- Would you shut up about that seminar!
162
00:16:40,260 --> 00:16:42,920
You shut up you pissant son of a bitch!
163
00:16:43,380 --> 00:16:45,710
Sorry! Didn't mean that.
164
00:16:49,030 --> 00:16:51,660
Hey listen, could you pull over.
I gotta see a man about a dog.
165
00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:11,470
Where'd you get the beer?
- Store.
166
00:17:15,080 --> 00:17:17,180
I guess I'll have one.
167
00:17:23,870 --> 00:17:28,820
You know, we don't drink beer at the
organization. It's kind of a crutch for...
168
00:17:28,820 --> 00:17:30,170
reality avoidance.
169
00:17:36,030 --> 00:17:39,710
Organization really gets you thinking about
things in a whole new light, you know?
170
00:17:40,670 --> 00:17:45,250
Like... ever wonder why people wear clothes?
- Nope!
171
00:17:46,070 --> 00:17:50,880
Look at it this way, man's best friend
is his apparel. Now...
172
00:17:50,880 --> 00:17:55,290
you start to dress for success and you
will score with the babes and
173
00:17:55,290 --> 00:17:58,360
make the big bucks.
Gotta admit that's true.
174
00:17:58,360 --> 00:18:01,090
I don't have to admit that.
- You have to admit that!
175
00:18:01,090 --> 00:18:02,420
No I don't!
- Yes you do!
176
00:18:02,570 --> 00:18:03,750
I don't have to admit anything.
177
00:18:03,750 --> 00:18:05,670
You have to admit there's
hair on your head.
178
00:18:05,670 --> 00:18:07,630
No I don't.
- Well you have to admit that!
179
00:18:08,020 --> 00:18:09,580
Well you have to admit your
cat's dead!
180
00:18:09,580 --> 00:18:11,420
He's deader than a doornail!
181
00:18:11,840 --> 00:18:14,710
That cat is colder than a
well-digger's ass!
182
00:18:17,880 --> 00:18:21,760
Pretty hard to deny that isn't it,
Mr. Smartypants.
183
00:18:22,610 --> 00:18:27,290
Yep! Deceased. El Morto.
No more mister kitty cat.
184
00:18:30,670 --> 00:18:36,010
Man, I love drama.
Really gets the old juices flowing.
185
00:18:52,430 --> 00:18:57,050
What... oh no, it's after midnight!
I have to get this car back!
186
00:18:57,140 --> 00:19:00,410
This road leads to the freeway.
187
00:19:00,450 --> 00:19:01,870
Oh horseshit!
188
00:19:04,620 --> 00:19:07,190
It's not a road - it's a river!
- River!
189
00:19:07,650 --> 00:19:10,750
Stupid! It's the middle of the desert.
190
00:19:16,060 --> 00:19:19,340
Turn around. I can't go out here.
I have a heart condition.
191
00:19:19,820 --> 00:19:24,690
I have to bury Simon first.
- Bury the stinkin' cat now and turn around!
192
00:19:24,690 --> 00:19:27,030
It has to be the right spot!
193
00:19:31,450 --> 00:19:38,280
Great! This is just great! Now I'm stuck in the
middle of the desert with an ignoramus!
194
00:19:38,840 --> 00:19:42,390
You're the ignoramus!
This is your car!
195
00:19:42,390 --> 00:19:46,820
Stop! Have some of your cereal!
See how you like that! Huh!?
196
00:19:48,390 --> 00:19:51,820
Rub it in your hair and
stick it up your butt!
197
00:19:58,930 --> 00:20:02,330
Don't ever - ever! Call my cat stinky!
198
00:20:08,300 --> 00:20:12,310
You're a killer!
You're a sick killer!
199
00:20:50,020 --> 00:20:53,530
Hey!
- Oh... where are... please.
200
00:20:54,110 --> 00:20:56,020
Car won't start.
- Huh?!
201
00:21:07,020 --> 00:21:09,420
Pop the hood, will you?
202
00:21:15,670 --> 00:21:20,350
Ahh! I'm going to get kicked out of
the organization for this.
203
00:21:21,220 --> 00:21:27,220
The freeway's just over that hill. Go call the
organization tell them to come out here to pick us up.
204
00:21:29,150 --> 00:21:32,930
Just give them a buzz. Tell
them out in the middle of the desert
205
00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:35,050
with an asswipe
and a frozen cat.
206
00:21:36,660 --> 00:21:40,260
Why don't you go call your mother and
have her come out here and push us back?
207
00:21:49,040 --> 00:21:52,310
Get that stinky cat out of my
car and bury it.
208
00:21:52,800 --> 00:21:54,740
This isn't the right spot.
209
00:21:56,560 --> 00:21:59,290
This... is the right spot.
210
00:22:05,690 --> 00:22:08,160
Don't touch my cat.
211
00:22:10,310 --> 00:22:11,340
Okay.
212
00:22:12,370 --> 00:22:14,910
Don't come crying to me if you can't
find the right spot.
213
00:22:15,200 --> 00:22:19,730
Anybody in their right mind would be
pleased as punch to bury a cat here.
214
00:22:23,800 --> 00:22:26,830
Well, we've got to get organized.
215
00:22:28,420 --> 00:22:33,460
Now, do you remember where it was that
you went off the highway?
216
00:22:33,570 --> 00:22:34,940
I don't remember.
217
00:22:35,560 --> 00:22:39,840
Uh... do you remember the name of the
last town we went through?
218
00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:45,520
I think it started with a B.
- Well it is kind of important you know...
219
00:22:45,520 --> 00:22:50,070
A lot of towns start with B.
Boston. Barcelonia...
220
00:22:50,110 --> 00:22:54,340
It wasn't Barcelonia.
- I know it wasn't Barcelonia, that's in Spain!
221
00:22:56,410 --> 00:23:02,870
Well. I think that the closest town is
this spot here. Prod.
222
00:23:05,170 --> 00:23:06,530
Prod's that way.
223
00:23:07,320 --> 00:23:08,920
No, it's not.
It's that way.
224
00:23:18,160 --> 00:23:21,080
Hey! Uh. I kind of think we
should stick together.
225
00:23:22,850 --> 00:23:26,980
Ok! I won't fight it!
It's your problem!
226
00:23:27,450 --> 00:23:34,420
It's
your life you're ruining! I am not
going that way!
I am going to Prod!
227
00:24:24,490 --> 00:24:27,330
Maybe I should get back to the car.
228
00:24:29,160 --> 00:24:30,740
Maybe I should hurry.
229
00:24:34,270 --> 00:24:39,330
You see, Simon? This is what happens when
you go out of the house.
230
00:25:11,410 --> 00:25:12,190
Ahh!
231
00:25:15,530 --> 00:25:16,000
Ahh!
232
00:25:25,060 --> 00:25:29,240
Ha ha ha!
233
00:25:29,960 --> 00:25:34,440
Ooh!
- Go ahead and laugh! I doesn't hurt me if you laugh.
234
00:25:34,720 --> 00:25:39,290
Ha! Ha! Ha!
Did you find the freeway funny guy?
235
00:25:39,290 --> 00:25:41,150
Did you see the freeway?
236
00:25:44,850 --> 00:25:46,160
No.
237
00:25:50,620 --> 00:25:54,630
Prod's that way.
- No it's not. I went that way.
238
00:25:54,710 --> 00:25:58,770
Look. We've got to get organized.
We have to set goals.
239
00:26:00,700 --> 00:26:06,770
Why don't we bury your cat here and we'll
follow the car tracks back the way we came?
240
00:26:09,510 --> 00:26:10,100
Okay.
241
00:26:11,170 --> 00:26:13,830
Now you're talking.
242
00:26:13,860 --> 00:26:19,440
We could bury a cat under that
cactus and that way he would have a
243
00:26:19,460 --> 00:26:21,880
beautiful view of the rocks.
244
00:26:22,280 --> 00:26:24,010
Bury him up there.
245
00:26:25,250 --> 00:26:26,760
Up there?
246
00:26:29,510 --> 00:26:32,430
Alright but I'm not going
to walk all the way up there.
247
00:26:32,460 --> 00:26:34,120
I am not going to ruin
my feet.
248
00:26:35,500 --> 00:26:37,720
What are you going to dig the hole with?
249
00:26:40,110 --> 00:26:42,120
I don't know what he think's he's going
to dig the hole with...
250
00:26:59,890 --> 00:27:01,340
What's that?
251
00:27:03,770 --> 00:27:06,150
House?
- Might have a phone.
252
00:27:07,700 --> 00:27:11,020
Let's finish up here quick
and go see.
253
00:27:18,100 --> 00:27:20,470
You better get that cat in the
ground real fast.
254
00:27:23,230 --> 00:27:26,130
I mean there could be puma's around
here, you know?
255
00:27:28,120 --> 00:27:32,110
Puma can smell a dead cat
fourty miles off.
256
00:27:54,710 --> 00:27:57,030
Quit stalling. Bury the cat.
257
00:28:06,120 --> 00:28:10,090
It's gonna get weird now, isn't it?
- This isn't the right spot.
258
00:28:11,120 --> 00:28:14,890
Bury him over by the house.
- Are you crazy?!
259
00:28:14,940 --> 00:28:17,920
This is the perfect spot to bury a cat!
260
00:28:18,010 --> 00:28:23,480
Any cat in their right mind would be
happy as a clam to be buried here!
261
00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:30,620
Good Lord! Not the right spot!
You got a big problem, Rubin.
262
00:28:31,110 --> 00:28:33,030
You got a
big problem.
263
00:28:36,130 --> 00:28:40,410
I am an incredibly
powerful sales person who
264
00:28:40,430 --> 00:28:46,510
continually climbs higher and
higher up the ladder of success.
265
00:28:47,360 --> 00:28:51,220
I am an incredibly
powerful sales person who
266
00:28:51,540 --> 00:28:53,940
continually climbs higher and higher...
267
00:29:02,310 --> 00:29:06,640
Man... it is el warmo out here.
268
00:29:07,420 --> 00:29:10,250
I am thirsty!
Aren't you thirsty?
269
00:29:30,930 --> 00:29:32,940
Oh... Lord!
270
00:29:34,590 --> 00:29:36,290
Oh Lord!
271
00:29:37,090 --> 00:29:42,900
That is the most disgusting thing I have
ever seen. Boy... talk about el weirdo!
272
00:29:43,050 --> 00:29:44,950
You take the cake, buster.
273
00:29:48,270 --> 00:29:51,210
Hey... could we rest for a minute?!
274
00:29:53,440 --> 00:29:56,320
I have a heart condition, you know.
I have to take care of myself.
275
00:29:58,340 --> 00:30:00,570
I don't care what you do. I'm resting.
276
00:30:14,800 --> 00:30:16,410
You ever married, Rubin?
277
00:30:19,130 --> 00:30:20,690
Yeah, I was married... once.
278
00:30:22,880 --> 00:30:28,890
Yeah I said, "honey, I could make a lot of
money for you." So - she married me.
279
00:30:30,080 --> 00:30:33,880
Three years later I'm still making nine thou
a year, so she left.
280
00:30:35,990 --> 00:30:38,480
That's when I first became
interested in the organization.
281
00:30:38,850 --> 00:30:43,780
Would you shut up about the organization?!
I'm not interested, okay?!
282
00:30:43,790 --> 00:30:45,890
Okay. Take it easy.
283
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:53,620
So... what kind of cat was Simon?
284
00:30:54,080 --> 00:30:57,890
A good cat.
- I mean, was he siamese or what?
285
00:31:19,660 --> 00:31:22,760
Look, I was just trying to be friendly.
286
00:31:23,350 --> 00:31:25,750
I like cats too, you know.
287
00:31:33,040 --> 00:31:39,700
My cat liked music.
- Music? You into
Cat Stevens? Ha ha!
288
00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:48,120
Mahler.
-
Mahler? That's weird.
289
00:31:48,800 --> 00:31:51,860
Did you ever see that movie
Cat People?
-
Cat People?
290
00:31:51,860 --> 00:31:57,070
Yeah
Cat People. They worshipped cats.
Hated dogs but worshipped cats.
291
00:31:57,610 --> 00:32:00,030
I saw part of
Cat on a Hot Tin Roof.
292
00:32:01,130 --> 00:32:02,660
You ever see
Chat Bleu?
293
00:32:04,660 --> 00:32:07,530
Man, that is
a powerful flick.
294
00:32:25,780 --> 00:32:28,940
What happened to it's tail?
- Fan.
295
00:32:29,870 --> 00:32:38,450
Fan's can be damn dangerous.
- Fan's caused 1,114 serious injuries in 1988.
296
00:32:38,870 --> 00:32:40,030
Incredible.
297
00:32:43,420 --> 00:32:48,170
You can keep that.
Got 23 more of those.
298
00:32:52,980 --> 00:32:57,050
Did you ever have a dog?
I had one once. Pointer.
299
00:32:58,450 --> 00:33:01,400
He never could figure
out what to point at.
300
00:33:03,550 --> 00:33:05,300
People like that.
301
00:33:08,970 --> 00:33:10,840
People are like that, Rubin.
302
00:33:12,010 --> 00:33:15,370
They don't know what
they're supposed to do.
303
00:33:17,050 --> 00:33:20,360
The organization could be so helpful
for a guy like you.
304
00:33:21,120 --> 00:33:24,590
For $300 I could start
you on the installment plan.
305
00:33:26,870 --> 00:33:31,530
You need help, Rubin! Look at your clothes.
- I like these clothes!
306
00:33:31,530 --> 00:33:35,610
Well, you don't have a job!
- I have money!
307
00:33:35,610 --> 00:33:39,250
Well, you don't have any friends.
Now you have to admit that!
308
00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:42,720
Nobody really likes you, Rubin.
I mean
really.
309
00:33:43,830 --> 00:33:47,050
Rubin...
Rubin.
310
00:33:59,040 --> 00:34:03,260
I knew it. We came all
the way out here for nothing!
311
00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:20,360
So Lord... Oh! That is the most
repulsive thing...
312
00:34:29,500 --> 00:34:35,930
Hey! C'mon. Now let's go. Let's go back
to the car and follow our tracks.
313
00:34:47,110 --> 00:34:53,030
That isn't funny.
Any Warhol was
a successful artist.
314
00:34:53,230 --> 00:34:58,790
What did he paint?
He painted Campbell's Soup cans.
315
00:35:03,040 --> 00:35:05,720
Look I really don't want to
talk about art right now. Let's go.
316
00:35:06,500 --> 00:35:09,720
He doesn't sound so great
to me, he sounds like a fraud.
317
00:35:10,060 --> 00:35:14,180
That's absurd! He's famous.
- Well you can be famous and be...
318
00:35:14,180 --> 00:35:17,710
a fraud... a famous fraud! Ha ha!
319
00:35:18,460 --> 00:35:22,660
I really don't want to talk about art.
Never talk about art or religion or politics.
320
00:35:22,660 --> 00:35:25,170
No wonder you don't have
any friends.
321
00:35:28,280 --> 00:35:30,680
At least I'm not a fraud.
322
00:35:32,230 --> 00:35:36,830
Fraud failure like you!
- I don't have time for this.
323
00:35:38,880 --> 00:35:42,440
Have to admit you're a failure, Ed.
Have to admit your wife left you...
324
00:35:42,440 --> 00:35:46,570
she couldn't stand to live with
a fraud failure! Ha ha!
325
00:35:47,430 --> 00:35:52,890
You leave my wife out of this! I'm walking
back to the car and following the tracks...
326
00:35:52,890 --> 00:35:55,520
back to the road, and
I'm going to Prod.
327
00:35:56,720 --> 00:35:59,230
Ha ha ha!
Go ahead!
328
00:36:00,560 --> 00:36:06,140
Prod is just over that hill!
I'll be in Prod before you!
329
00:36:07,590 --> 00:36:09,650
Ha ha ha!
330
00:36:25,250 --> 00:36:27,830
Where's the car?
- I don't know.
331
00:36:30,320 --> 00:36:32,770
Where are you going?
- Away from you!
332
00:36:47,150 --> 00:36:49,920
I can't believe you're still
carrying that thing.
333
00:36:51,110 --> 00:36:57,610
You know what I think? I think you're afraid
to bury that cat because it's all you have.
334
00:36:57,930 --> 00:37:01,440
That's what I think. What do
you think about that?!
335
00:37:01,880 --> 00:37:07,320
I think... your car's that way.
- Well then go that way!
336
00:37:07,330 --> 00:37:11,250
Stop following me! Go ruin
somebody else's life!
337
00:37:41,210 --> 00:37:47,650
And another thing! I don't look at failure
as failure! I look at failure as...
338
00:37:47,650 --> 00:37:53,530
an opportunity to develop my senses.
I laugh at failure - ha ha ha!
339
00:37:53,530 --> 00:37:56,210
Ow! Son of a bitch! Ah!
340
00:38:07,750 --> 00:38:09,380
I knew I could find it.
341
00:38:11,280 --> 00:38:13,500
Didn't fail at that, did I?
342
00:38:14,890 --> 00:38:18,370
Oh, brother.
Mr. Busta's gonna love this!
343
00:38:42,540 --> 00:38:46,310
Okay! Ha ha!
344
00:38:52,380 --> 00:38:58,290
Just see who get's to
Prod first, sucker! Ha ha!
345
00:39:53,280 --> 00:39:59,310
Ed. First thing's first. Now remember,
the big "E" - enthusiasm!
346
00:40:02,050 --> 00:40:06,060
Hello?
- Hello Rula, I was just thinking about you...
347
00:40:06,060 --> 00:40:10,230
and I thought I'd give you a bell.
- You've got a big problem, Ed!
348
00:40:10,230 --> 00:40:13,780
Yeah I know.
- And you know the problem, isn't the problem.
349
00:40:13,780 --> 00:40:17,920
- It's how you handle a problem, that's a problem!
I know. I know.
350
00:40:18,290 --> 00:40:22,530
I think I deserve a bread winner, Ed.
And I'm not talking about
Wonderbread.
351
00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:24,040
I'm talking about croissants.
352
00:40:24,950 --> 00:40:31,170
Right now, Rula, I am out in the desert
handling a big mineral deal...
353
00:40:31,170 --> 00:40:33,220
You know minerals will really skyrocketing.
354
00:40:34,270 --> 00:40:37,610
I mean these oil people keep me
really jumping.
355
00:40:37,610 --> 00:40:43,980
Ha! I thought you said it was minerals?
- Well. Minerals... and oil. You know.
356
00:40:43,980 --> 00:40:47,750
Actually it's a big mineral oil deal.
- Mmm...
357
00:40:48,220 --> 00:40:54,560
Mineral oil... um.
Rula, could we just have a nice dinner some time?
358
00:40:55,630 --> 00:40:56,770
It's over, Ed.
359
00:40:58,070 --> 00:41:02,250
Why does it have to be over?
Please deposit $2.05 for the next 3 minutes.
360
00:41:02,410 --> 00:41:05,580
Why does it have to be over, Rula?
Please deposit $2.05...
361
00:41:05,920 --> 00:41:10,430
I don't have $2.05!
Rula!... Rula!...
362
00:41:18,010 --> 00:41:21,710
Real smooth, Ed.
Real smooth.
363
00:41:28,500 --> 00:41:35,660
Thanks. Listen, I'm looking for a friend.
He's got long hair and thick glasses...
364
00:41:35,660 --> 00:41:39,700
He's wearing bell-bottom pants.
- Never seen a guy like that.
365
00:41:39,740 --> 00:41:42,960
I never seen a guy like that either.
What's he drivin'?
366
00:41:43,020 --> 00:41:46,290
We had car trouble and he
decided to walk.
367
00:41:48,900 --> 00:41:52,250
On foot? A man don't last
long out there on foot.
368
00:41:52,470 --> 00:41:53,790
Where'd you break down?
369
00:41:55,830 --> 00:41:58,660
Sounds like he's out there on Snake Flats.
- Guy from New York died...
370
00:41:58,660 --> 00:42:01,500
from a snake that bit him out there.
- That was a scorpion!
371
00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:03,790
There are thousands more scorpions
than there are snakes.
372
00:42:03,790 --> 00:42:07,560
- That was a snake! A big snake! I outta
know, I drove him to the hospital.
373
00:42:08,100 --> 00:42:11,920
If your friend's headed north, why he's gonna
fall right down an abandoned mine shaft!
374
00:42:11,920 --> 00:42:13,660
That's not north, that's west!
375
00:42:13,810 --> 00:42:17,680
West is the test site.
- Test site's east. Sun comes up...
376
00:42:17,680 --> 00:42:19,400
in the east, goes down in the west.
377
00:42:20,410 --> 00:42:23,740
I sure hope your friend didn't go out east.
Radiation could kill a man in 30 seconds.
378
00:42:24,040 --> 00:42:26,250
He's exaggerating, it takes longer
than that.
379
00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:30,140
It takes exactly 30 seconds! I outta know.
I saw it on T.V.!
380
00:42:30,450 --> 00:42:33,140
Radiation?
- One thing about it though, if your friend is...
381
00:42:33,140 --> 00:42:36,050
still alive. This is where
he'll show up.
382
00:42:36,280 --> 00:42:39,740
Not another town for 100 miles.
He'll show up.
383
00:42:40,740 --> 00:42:42,160
Course he will.
384
00:42:43,210 --> 00:42:44,650
Course he will...
385
00:44:33,900 --> 00:44:36,870
Wow!
Ha ha ha!
386
00:45:33,090 --> 00:45:35,290
Do something, Ed!
387
00:45:38,750 --> 00:45:40,700
Take control!
388
00:45:43,370 --> 00:45:48,630
Hello?
- Hello, mom. I want you to call the organization...
389
00:45:48,630 --> 00:45:51,480
-and tell them that I'm sick.
You're not sick. You get over here and mow my...
390
00:45:51,480 --> 00:45:53,320
lawn just you said you
was going to.
391
00:45:53,320 --> 00:45:57,260
I'll do that later, mom. Just call
the organization, okay?
392
00:46:07,140 --> 00:46:08,630
Yes, I'll accept the call.
393
00:46:09,310 --> 00:46:13,700
Hello Ed, where you are son?
- Prod! Stupid, Utah!
394
00:46:13,700 --> 00:46:17,400
Is mom still there?
- Your mother's pretty well steamed.
395
00:46:17,560 --> 00:46:20,730
The organization's been here twice this morning.
They're pretty well steamed too.
396
00:46:21,140 --> 00:46:24,100
A fella named Busta stopped by
and wants to know where you're at.
397
00:46:24,130 --> 00:46:25,690
Mr. Busta?
- Yes.
398
00:46:25,940 --> 00:46:30,280
He said that you better have that car back by
5 o'clock or he's gonna have to call the police.
399
00:46:30,280 --> 00:46:34,110
Police?! Oh... great!
400
00:46:34,940 --> 00:46:39,610
Terrific! Thanks a lot dad.
Now, can you put mom back on?
401
00:46:40,340 --> 00:46:41,900
Hey, mom, it's for you.
402
00:46:43,580 --> 00:46:45,260
Hello, mom.
- Yes?
403
00:46:45,830 --> 00:46:48,730
Mom, is that you?
- Yes!
404
00:46:49,990 --> 00:46:51,970
Ha ha!
405
00:46:54,580 --> 00:46:58,260
You tell that idiot in the bell-bottoms when
he shows up I couldn't wait.
406
00:46:58,260 --> 00:47:00,650
Okay. What if he don't?
- Don't what?
407
00:47:00,650 --> 00:47:01,580
Show up?
408
00:47:03,260 --> 00:47:05,940
I gotta go find him, right?
- I dunno.
409
00:47:05,960 --> 00:47:09,990
I got to find him or he'll get bit by a
radiated snake and he'll fall...
410
00:47:09,990 --> 00:47:11,960
down an abandoned mine shaft,
right?
411
00:47:11,960 --> 00:47:15,730
I dunno.
- Well, forget it. He's on his own!
412
00:47:28,080 --> 00:47:33,120
I'm happy as hell ol' batface is out there
shriveling up like an old turd, I'm happy as hell!
413
00:47:34,380 --> 00:47:37,630
I'm... happy as hell!
414
00:47:41,230 --> 00:47:46,010
Okay... I have to go back to get the
hopeless son of a bitch!
415
00:47:48,040 --> 00:47:51,050
It's his own damn fault!
416
00:47:51,050 --> 00:47:57,270
I can't believe anybody would ever suck
on
Odor Eaters! Ugh!
417
00:48:22,290 --> 00:48:25,620
Ahh!
Ahh!
418
00:48:34,010 --> 00:48:41,090
No! No, no!
- Ah ha ha ha! Alright!
419
00:48:45,790 --> 00:48:54,850
Ugh! Oh. Heart.
Oh. Oh.
420
00:48:56,490 --> 00:49:00,890
Just take it easy, Ed.
Just take it... easy.
421
00:49:41,860 --> 00:49:44,000
Echo...
422
00:49:45,100 --> 00:49:48,140
Echo!
423
00:50:19,290 --> 00:50:22,750
Ow ow ow ow ow.
424
00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:35,150
Echo people.
425
00:51:08,310 --> 00:51:09,630
Wow!
426
00:51:17,370 --> 00:51:18,530
Meow!
427
00:51:30,450 --> 00:51:32,560
Meow.
428
00:51:34,880 --> 00:51:39,670
Hello Rubin! I love you!
I love your shoes!
429
00:51:39,940 --> 00:51:45,650
You're a king! A king!
A king!
430
00:51:45,650 --> 00:51:49,010
My cat can eat a whole watermelon!
431
00:51:49,560 --> 00:51:51,220
Meow!
432
00:52:05,170 --> 00:52:08,660
Hey. Hey! Hey weirdo!
Hey weirdo!
433
00:52:10,420 --> 00:52:13,790
Hey weirdo! Hey weirdo!
Come out and play!
434
00:52:14,860 --> 00:52:18,820
C'mon weirdo! Your cat's down here!
Ha ha ha!
435
00:52:19,710 --> 00:52:22,540
Uh oh! Cat overboard!
436
00:52:23,860 --> 00:52:27,190
Not much of a swimmer, is he?
- Hey!
437
00:52:39,060 --> 00:52:40,630
Meow!
438
00:53:09,680 --> 00:53:12,820
That's an asswipe up there.
439
00:53:25,710 --> 00:53:27,710
Rubin...
440
00:53:30,350 --> 00:53:34,280
Hey! This is not all that humorous
you know.
441
00:53:35,970 --> 00:53:37,980
Holy Moses.
442
00:53:45,350 --> 00:53:50,520
Indian. Could be Apache.
443
00:53:57,130 --> 00:54:02,930
Oh! Ha ha! There you are! Boy you look
like a total dork!
444
00:54:04,480 --> 00:54:08,670
Echo people.
- Echo people? God Lord.
445
00:54:09,230 --> 00:54:10,360
Uh. Get up.
446
00:54:10,790 --> 00:54:13,890
Echo people.
- Rubin. Get up!
447
00:54:14,350 --> 00:54:20,000
Let's get your jacket on there.
Yeah, hypothermia won't help.
448
00:54:20,260 --> 00:54:24,980
Get that jacket on.
Atta boy. Good work! Okay!
449
00:54:25,430 --> 00:54:26,500
Let's go!
450
00:54:27,450 --> 00:54:32,070
You're gonna... you'll want to let
go of that cooler, Rubin.
451
00:54:32,780 --> 00:54:36,920
Rubin, let go of the!...
452
00:54:38,000 --> 00:54:41,960
Okay! That's good! That's good!
No cat! C'mon! C'mon!
453
00:54:42,320 --> 00:54:48,750
Let's get up on our feet here. Yeah! C'mon!
Atta boy. You can do it. That's it. Okay.
454
00:54:50,120 --> 00:54:52,720
Nope, nope! Nevermind, it's time to go!
455
00:54:54,840 --> 00:54:58,120
Okay... okay...
456
00:54:59,230 --> 00:55:05,120
I'll bury Simon. You be the supervisor,
I'll be the burier.
457
00:55:05,900 --> 00:55:10,610
Then... we are going to march out
of here. Okay?
458
00:55:10,720 --> 00:55:14,860
Now you see? This is how you
dig a hole.
459
00:55:15,590 --> 00:55:19,940
Tellin' you, Rubin. Your whole problem is.
You just won't let go!
460
00:55:20,110 --> 00:55:22,970
You can't hold on to something
when it's dead!
461
00:55:24,170 --> 00:55:27,990
Man, anybody ever needed that
seminar... it is you!
462
00:55:28,960 --> 00:55:33,140
Go on to the next step.
If you don't, well you find...
463
00:55:33,140 --> 00:55:39,380
yourself all of a sudden standing there
holding a big ol' pile of nothing!
464
00:55:40,710 --> 00:55:41,920
I know.
465
00:55:44,750 --> 00:55:48,430
I was on the road to success. Sure...
466
00:55:48,990 --> 00:55:53,450
I coulda been driving my own
Thunderbird. No!
467
00:55:55,500 --> 00:56:01,440
I had to let it all go, so I could come out to
this god forsaken place...
468
00:56:01,440 --> 00:56:06,560
and show some asswipe how to
bury a soggy cat!
469
00:56:16,610 --> 00:56:20,550
I'm sorry, Rubin.
I didn't mean it.
470
00:56:25,850 --> 00:56:33,300
Oh Lord! Hell of a good looking cat you've
got here, Rubin. Magnificent... creature!
471
00:56:40,080 --> 00:56:42,230
Sorry, Simon.
472
00:56:45,470 --> 00:56:49,900
It's like a custom fit!
Ha ha! Look at this, Rubin!
473
00:56:49,900 --> 00:56:54,340
Here's ol' Mickey! Rubber squeaky mouse!
474
00:56:55,290 --> 00:56:58,080
Right in there with good ol' Simon.
475
00:56:58,940 --> 00:57:04,610
Boy. I tell you Rubin, this is really a
swell place that you've picked here.
476
00:57:04,850 --> 00:57:09,070
I mean this is tremendous!
Oh boy, I'm not kidding either!
477
00:57:09,170 --> 00:57:14,680
Any cat would be... proud as a clam
to be buried here!
478
00:57:17,720 --> 00:57:23,590
Okay. Yeah, if that doesn't say "Here Lies
Simon", I don't know what does.
479
00:57:24,970 --> 00:57:27,070
How's that?
Okay?
480
00:57:31,760 --> 00:57:33,140
Right.
481
00:57:38,770 --> 00:57:43,730
Dear Lord. Uh.
Bless this feline.
482
00:57:44,430 --> 00:57:47,210
Um. He's a good cat.
483
00:57:52,790 --> 00:57:56,630
He was a good friend to Rubin.
- Yeah...
484
00:57:57,480 --> 00:58:02,140
Even though Rubin himself can
really be a... well...
485
00:58:04,510 --> 00:58:08,070
Rubin loved this cat.
486
00:58:14,070 --> 00:58:15,760
Amen.
487
00:58:26,940 --> 00:58:30,480
I don't see anything that looks familiar.
I don't know where the hell I am...
488
00:58:30,480 --> 00:58:31,920
Does this look familiar to you?
489
00:58:32,460 --> 00:58:38,040
My cat can eat a whole watermelon.
- Oh, horseshit!
490
00:58:43,150 --> 00:58:50,080
There! Jabber down there with the rest
of the crockpots! See how you like that!
491
00:58:52,690 --> 00:58:59,070
Echo people worshipped cats.
- Oh Echo people my butt! There are no Echo people.
492
00:58:59,260 --> 00:59:05,290
I told you that 15 times. Just shut
up about the Echo people. Jesus.
493
00:59:18,430 --> 00:59:20,210
Heart!
494
00:59:41,410 --> 00:59:44,720
After admitting that your wife left you,
she couldn't stand to live with a
495
00:59:44,720 --> 00:59:45,860
fraud failure!
496
00:59:46,950 --> 00:59:47,950
I love you Ed.
497
01:00:11,960 --> 01:00:13,980
Where it happen...?
498
01:00:16,680 --> 01:00:18,160
What happened?
499
01:00:26,700 --> 01:00:28,600
C'mon Rubbie, let's go.
500
01:00:33,390 --> 01:00:34,970
Can you get up?
501
01:00:44,450 --> 01:00:48,390
Son of a bitch.
That dirty son of a bitch!
502
01:01:04,440 --> 01:01:06,830
Now I'm not one to mettle in another's business...
- Good.
503
01:01:07,590 --> 01:01:10,400
You feeling better Rubin?
- Better.
504
01:01:10,450 --> 01:01:13,020
You don't seem like no kidnapper to me.
505
01:01:13,020 --> 01:01:15,290
Kidnapper? What are you talking about?
506
01:01:15,580 --> 01:01:18,230
Seems that fella who's head you're
watering there, his mother found...
507
01:01:18,230 --> 01:01:20,250
your business card,
reported him kidnapped.
508
01:01:21,230 --> 01:01:24,500
How would you know that?
- State trooper's through here an hour ago.
509
01:01:24,740 --> 01:01:29,850
Your mother told him you were in Prod.
- My mother... that figures!
510
01:01:29,920 --> 01:01:32,730
They said you was a dangerous car
thief and kidnapper.
511
01:01:33,210 --> 01:01:35,310
You don't look all that kidnapped to me.
512
01:01:44,180 --> 01:01:46,210
Listen um...
513
01:01:46,680 --> 01:01:50,630
Could I borrow a quarter? I want to get
this thing straightened out right away.
514
01:01:50,900 --> 01:01:55,000
Thanks. Police are reasonable people,
they'll understand.
515
01:01:55,320 --> 01:01:56,620
Course they will.
516
01:02:02,630 --> 01:02:06,040
Sheriff's Department.
- Hello, Police, uh. This is Ed Tuttle...
517
01:02:06,040 --> 01:02:07,500
uh, the kidnapper you're after.
518
01:02:08,040 --> 01:02:13,730
Um, I think there's been a little misunderstanding.
I was just helping bury a frozen cat.
519
01:02:14,070 --> 01:02:16,510
Mr. Tuttle - is Rubin Farr alright?
520
01:02:17,410 --> 01:02:22,200
Oh, he is so messed up it
is unbelievable.
521
01:02:22,350 --> 01:02:27,030
Uh but it was his cat, it was not mine.
I said look, I said let's bury him under...
522
01:02:27,030 --> 01:02:31,770
that cactus but no, he wanted to bury him
in the cave of the Echo people so...
523
01:02:31,770 --> 01:02:37,040
anyway, I haven't done anything and I just wanted
you to get this all straightened out, okay?
524
01:02:37,090 --> 01:02:39,310
Where are you now, Mr. Tuttle?
Are you in Prod?
525
01:02:39,380 --> 01:02:40,570
Well of course I'm in Prod.
526
01:02:41,010 --> 01:02:42,190
Rubin's with me.
527
01:02:42,700 --> 01:02:44,610
Why, why... why do you care where we're at?
528
01:02:44,610 --> 01:02:49,970
Just, uh, di - you don't need to know that,
okay? I haven't done anything!
529
01:02:49,970 --> 01:02:53,760
Just calm down, Mr. Tuttle.
- You calm down! You are the ones...
530
01:02:53,760 --> 01:02:57,950
who are supposed to calm down, alright?!
Why the hell are you harassing me anyway?!
531
01:02:58,010 --> 01:03:00,740
I haven't done anything...
- Mr. Tuttle just stay where you are at.
532
01:03:00,820 --> 01:03:07,100
Don't Mr. Tuttle me! Alright?! Now if you bozo's
had an ounce of sense...
533
01:03:07,100 --> 01:03:11,340
you'd go after the real criminals! You'd go after
the son of a bitch that spray painted...
534
01:03:11,340 --> 01:03:14,660
"
Andy Warhol sucks a big one"
on my car!
535
01:03:20,470 --> 01:03:24,680
Well... that oughta straighten it all out.
- Yeah...
536
01:03:27,730 --> 01:03:30,060
Rubin. We've gotta get out of here fast.
537
01:03:46,150 --> 01:03:47,750
Oh Lord!
538
01:04:04,780 --> 01:04:05,820
Head down!
539
01:04:12,710 --> 01:04:15,840
I can't believe it.
It just keeps getting worse!
540
01:04:27,930 --> 01:04:30,910
You got any money?
We need gas.
541
01:04:31,080 --> 01:04:33,820
Lost my wallet.
- Oh that figures.
542
01:04:37,580 --> 01:04:40,140
Wrong street for my house.
- I know that!
543
01:04:40,190 --> 01:04:47,030
Look we're not going anywhere unless we get
some gas! Gotta be one around here somewhere...
544
01:04:49,190 --> 01:04:51,210
This is my old neighborhood.
545
01:05:12,750 --> 01:05:15,060
Oh, no. Rula!
Ah!
546
01:05:18,880 --> 01:05:23,450
Hey, Ed! What are you doing in the bushes?!
I want to go home!
547
01:05:25,720 --> 01:05:26,280
Shh!
548
01:05:27,310 --> 01:05:30,730
What? Want me to be quiet?
549
01:05:41,240 --> 01:05:47,520
Rula!
...What a wonderful surprise. I was just...
550
01:05:47,890 --> 01:05:51,780
looking for my cat! Bugger
seems to have run off.
551
01:05:52,690 --> 01:05:55,360
You've got a big problem, Ed.
552
01:05:56,230 --> 01:05:59,530
I know.
- And you're not ever gonna do anything about...
553
01:05:59,530 --> 01:06:03,520
the problem because you refuse to
accept that you have one!
554
01:06:04,010 --> 01:06:06,560
I know. I know.
- We better go, Rula.
555
01:06:06,560 --> 01:06:11,920
You're afraid to ask yourself the right questions.
Why? Because you're afraid of...
556
01:06:11,920 --> 01:06:17,030
the answers but sometimes it's more
important to
ask the
right questions...
557
01:06:17,030 --> 01:06:23,010
than it is to
know the right answers!
- Sometimes Rula, I dunno what the hell you're talking about.
558
01:06:24,490 --> 01:06:29,260
That's part of the
problem.
- I know! I know!
559
01:06:29,620 --> 01:06:35,540
We better go, Rula.
- Don't you
ever interrupt me.
560
01:06:35,540 --> 01:06:40,070
I'm sorry. I am. I'm sorry.
- You've got a big problem too, ya know...
561
01:06:40,090 --> 01:06:41,740
Just who the hell are
you anyway?!
562
01:06:44,100 --> 01:06:50,050
This is Jimbo. He is my...
fiancé.
- Your
fiancé?
563
01:06:51,020 --> 01:06:54,430
You're gonna marry...
him?
- Hey! I resent that!
564
01:06:54,850 --> 01:06:58,450
How'd you like a kick right in the taco, buster?
- Shut up, Ed!
565
01:06:58,630 --> 01:07:04,500
No! You shut up! I... am sick and tired
of shutting up!
566
01:07:04,720 --> 01:07:07,540
C'mon Rula, let's go.
- Let go of my arm!
567
01:07:07,730 --> 01:07:12,410
I am not the one with the problem! You're
the fella with the problem!
568
01:07:12,410 --> 01:07:13,930
Oh yeah?!
- Yeah!
569
01:07:13,930 --> 01:07:18,550
Ha ha! Well,
you are
lousy in bed! All those years...
570
01:07:18,550 --> 01:07:22,670
I never had one... single... orgasm.
571
01:07:24,760 --> 01:07:27,390
Ahh!
572
01:07:27,950 --> 01:07:29,470
Ha ha! You missed me!
573
01:07:30,050 --> 01:07:31,140
See I'm bleeding. I'm bleeding!
574
01:07:31,920 --> 01:07:36,400
You are a miserable, miserable, miserable,
miserable failure!
575
01:07:38,570 --> 01:07:41,670
I hate you!
- Rula. I'm going... I'm going.
576
01:07:41,770 --> 01:07:42,910
This. I'm going.
577
01:07:48,960 --> 01:07:50,480
Who's that?
578
01:07:51,330 --> 01:07:53,320
It's my wife.
- You know what your problem is?
579
01:07:53,440 --> 01:07:56,620
You've got a persistent, personal dilemma.
580
01:07:57,000 --> 01:08:00,280
I'm gonna be sick!
- That's why you'll never earn any money...
581
01:08:00,340 --> 01:08:05,540
and that's why you'll never be a success!
God knows I tried to steer you in the...
582
01:08:05,540 --> 01:08:08,810
right direction! But you're
so stupid!
583
01:08:08,910 --> 01:08:12,980
You couldn't get it! You're just a loser!
584
01:08:12,980 --> 01:08:15,220
You're just a hopeless loser!
585
01:08:40,380 --> 01:08:41,530
Ahh!
586
01:09:13,690 --> 01:09:17,120
She's the one with the problem.
- Yeah I...
587
01:09:17,970 --> 01:09:22,130
She always... I just thought we were...
588
01:09:22,950 --> 01:09:26,400
something special, you know.
- It's all messed up.
589
01:09:27,810 --> 01:09:30,390
You've gotta go on to the next step.
590
01:09:36,250 --> 01:09:41,590
Man! You
really need that seminar!
591
01:09:42,050 --> 01:09:43,150
Ha ha!
592
01:09:44,390 --> 01:09:47,670
You really know how to hurt a guy,
you know that?
593
01:09:48,690 --> 01:09:53,170
You... you...
really need that seminar!
594
01:09:53,410 --> 01:09:55,460
Shut your yap!
- Ha ha ha!
595
01:10:03,480 --> 01:10:06,850
Now chant along with me... I am incredi...
596
01:10:07,160 --> 01:10:08,740
Ha ha ha!
597
01:10:11,490 --> 01:10:16,180
You know, what the number one difference...
between you and a rich man is?
598
01:10:16,440 --> 01:10:20,330
He's got money... and you don't!
Ha ha ha!
599
01:10:20,440 --> 01:10:23,830
You know what the number one difference is
between me and a rich man?
600
01:10:24,880 --> 01:10:28,060
He's got my bitchy wife
and I don't!
601
01:10:28,440 --> 01:10:31,320
Ha ha ha!
- Ha ha!
602
01:10:31,800 --> 01:10:35,450
And if he was smart, he would
ask himself, "why?".
603
01:10:37,890 --> 01:10:46,360
I can't believe that you didn't even get one...
person to that
stupid seminar! Ha ha!
604
01:10:54,610 --> 01:10:56,850
I wear $1200 suits.
605
01:10:57,450 --> 01:10:59,960
That's a $2500 watch.
606
01:11:00,230 --> 01:11:03,500
I drive a Lincoln Continental and I
park it in my 3 car garage...
607
01:11:03,500 --> 01:11:06,380
next to my Cadillac and my Mercedes.
608
01:11:06,830 --> 01:11:11,420
People who say that money can't buy
happiness... just don't know where to shop!
609
01:11:11,660 --> 01:11:13,320
Ha ha ha!
610
01:11:20,340 --> 01:11:23,380
Shut up! You're going to sit down and you're
going to be behave like a gentleman!
611
01:11:23,380 --> 01:11:24,030
Okay. Okay.
612
01:11:25,930 --> 01:11:26,930
Okay. C'mon.
613
01:11:28,850 --> 01:11:30,760
Excuse us, folks.
Excuse us.
614
01:11:31,000 --> 01:11:32,050
Excuse us.
615
01:11:32,950 --> 01:11:37,880
Um. Sorry, sorry. Truly sorry.
Sit down! Sit down!
616
01:11:39,710 --> 01:11:41,600
Car's back. Everything's cool.
617
01:11:47,220 --> 01:11:50,850
Tonight I'd like to introduce you to
a couple of old friends.
618
01:11:51,440 --> 01:11:53,480
Who's the biggest failure
in this room?
619
01:11:56,530 --> 01:11:58,800
Raise your hand, Ed.
620
01:11:59,060 --> 01:12:00,650
I don't see many hands going up.
621
01:12:01,710 --> 01:12:06,140
That's because that nobody's taught you
that the secret to...
622
01:12:06,140 --> 01:12:12,400
success is to fail and keep trying!
If you haven't failed, you haven't tried!
623
01:12:12,540 --> 01:12:17,270
Boy that's really profound.
Sure worth $3000, hmm?
624
01:12:18,960 --> 01:12:21,570
Let me tell you something, pal.
625
01:12:21,570 --> 01:12:25,270
If you don't like what I'm saying, you can
leave. Nobody's forcing you to stay here.
626
01:12:26,300 --> 01:12:28,430
Good!
- Sit!
627
01:12:28,470 --> 01:12:31,510
Alright this has gone far enough!
Would you escort Mr. Tuttle and his friend...
628
01:12:31,510 --> 01:12:32,450
to the door please.
629
01:12:32,450 --> 01:12:35,920
You touch me and I'll sue
you into a coma.
630
01:12:36,190 --> 01:12:39,260
I paid my money and I'm staying.
- Then be quiet!
631
01:12:39,530 --> 01:12:42,390
Okay, fine.
It's your seminar.
632
01:12:43,050 --> 01:12:45,540
We'll be quiet.
Won't we, Rubin.
633
01:12:48,070 --> 01:12:49,750
Quiet as clams.
634
01:12:51,040 --> 01:12:52,050
Good.
635
01:12:54,100 --> 01:12:55,440
Not a peep.
636
01:12:57,200 --> 01:12:58,530
Good.
637
01:13:00,990 --> 01:13:02,690
Quiet as a well-digger's ass.
638
01:13:03,710 --> 01:13:07,040
Will you shut up!
- Sure.
639
01:13:13,030 --> 01:13:16,010
Success!
- Success!
640
01:13:16,630 --> 01:13:17,860
Is there an echo in here?
641
01:13:18,140 --> 01:13:20,770
Real estate!
- Real estate!
642
01:13:20,940 --> 01:13:25,110
The Power of Positive Real Estate!
The "PPR"!
643
01:13:25,110 --> 01:13:28,010
The organization!
- Yay! Yeah!
644
01:13:34,510 --> 01:13:37,810
Are you the kind of high caliber
motivated individual that'll...
645
01:13:37,810 --> 01:13:40,610
stop at nothing to get what
you deserve?!
646
01:13:41,500 --> 01:13:43,070
Who are you?
647
01:13:45,020 --> 01:13:46,020
Who are you...
648
01:13:49,620 --> 01:13:52,100
Who are you...
649
01:13:59,780 --> 01:14:03,240
I am the king of the Echo people.
650
01:14:13,680 --> 01:14:16,600
There's no reason to be pushing a person!
- Get out of here!
651
01:14:16,600 --> 01:14:21,110
Oh yeah?! Hell, same goes to you and
everybody who rode in with ya!
652
01:14:23,870 --> 01:14:25,360
Hey! What the hell...
653
01:14:25,680 --> 01:14:28,290
No we're quite alright! Ha!
654
01:14:28,290 --> 01:14:31,520
I gotta hand it to you, Rubin.
That was el smarto!
655
01:14:31,620 --> 01:14:34,360
Boy you really make an impression.
656
01:14:35,470 --> 01:14:41,690
Those people are weird!
- They're weird? Ha! You are the one who's weird.
657
01:14:41,690 --> 01:14:47,050
I mean take your shoes for example, Rubin.
You have to admit those shoes are weird.
658
01:14:47,050 --> 01:14:48,750
I mean you have to admit that!
659
01:14:51,330 --> 01:14:56,030
Are you bald?
- Ha ha ha! I'm not completely bald.
660
01:14:56,030 --> 01:14:58,190
This is just a hair substitute.
661
01:14:58,190 --> 01:15:02,350
Many very successful people wear
hair substitutes...
Robert Redford...
662
01:15:02,350 --> 01:15:06,380
owns several.
- Well... he wears platform shoes too.
663
01:15:06,580 --> 01:15:10,600
Now
that is ridiculous!
I mean you are really something, y'know that?
664
01:15:10,910 --> 01:15:13,540
One rotten apple like that can ruin
a whole meeting!
665
01:15:13,540 --> 01:15:16,230
Yes sir.
- And that guy with the shoes! What is...
666
01:15:16,950 --> 01:15:19,420
Ahh! Ahh!
667
01:15:19,420 --> 01:15:21,630
He's not gonna get away with this!
Where's your car?
668
01:15:21,630 --> 01:15:25,980
Uhh, I don't have a car... where's your car?
- This is my car, stub dick!
669
01:15:25,980 --> 01:15:28,040
I thought you had a Lincoln and
a Mercedes and a Cadillac...
670
01:15:28,040 --> 01:15:30,280
Shut up and get in!
671
01:15:31,280 --> 01:15:33,930
Ahh!
We're gonna find that son of a bitch...
672
01:15:33,930 --> 01:15:40,090
and when we do, he's gonna wish to hell
he never heard of the organization! Go!
673
01:15:49,410 --> 01:15:54,560
I feel revitalized! Man I am really hungry!
Aren't you hungry?
674
01:16:16,740 --> 01:16:20,260
Whoa.
- What the hell was going on there?
675
01:16:22,800 --> 01:16:23,970
Ow!
676
01:16:25,080 --> 01:16:29,410
I am really hungry!
- You devil!
677
01:16:29,600 --> 01:16:33,050
We could get a fish burger around the
corner here... you're not a vegetarian...
678
01:16:33,050 --> 01:16:35,850
are you? Nevet met a vegetarian
I liked.
679
01:16:36,760 --> 01:16:39,680
I
hate vegetarians.
- Me too.
680
01:16:40,140 --> 01:16:43,450
I... I... I really hate 'em.
They're just... they're too damn picky!
681
01:16:43,800 --> 01:16:48,890
I hate New Age music too.
- Oh! That stuff could really make a guy sick!
682
01:16:49,090 --> 01:16:52,890
I hate it myself.
Yeah, wow! How I hate it!
683
01:16:53,290 --> 01:16:55,880
So uh... what about Republicans?
684
01:17:02,200 --> 01:17:03,810
I am a Republican.
685
01:17:05,260 --> 01:17:06,390
You are kidding.
686
01:17:07,370 --> 01:17:09,060
I'm a Republican too.
687
01:17:09,790 --> 01:17:11,750
Ha ha ha!
688
01:17:14,540 --> 01:17:17,340
Wait, wait!
There's the bastard now!
689
01:17:17,340 --> 01:17:19,680
Go around the other side of the block.
Hurry up!
690
01:17:25,010 --> 01:17:26,670
He's heading north on Main.
691
01:17:26,850 --> 01:17:29,560
You know, Rubin.
Life's a funny thing.
692
01:17:29,560 --> 01:17:33,370
Sometimes I just have to laugh at life.
Ya know, really. It gives me a chuckle.
693
01:17:34,030 --> 01:17:38,450
It's not a joke. I mean uh, ya know life
is damn serious when you think about it.
694
01:17:38,480 --> 01:17:39,480
Damn serious.
695
01:17:46,170 --> 01:17:47,230
Ahh!
696
01:17:48,660 --> 01:17:50,460
Now what the hell was that?
697
01:17:51,490 --> 01:17:56,110
Wreck.
Ya see? That is exactly what I was talking about...
698
01:17:56,110 --> 01:18:00,700
some poor guy is driving along, minding
his own business and all of a...
699
01:18:00,700 --> 01:18:05,320
sudden life just leaps up and
smacks him right in the face.
700
01:18:06,850 --> 01:18:08,940
Hope that poor bugger was insured.
701
01:18:09,400 --> 01:18:15,480
Look! Damnit! If you bozo's had any
brains you'd catch the son of a bitch that...
702
01:18:15,480 --> 01:18:19,060
painted "
Andy Warhol sucks a big
one" on my car!
703
01:18:27,200 --> 01:18:31,380
Y'know Rubin. If you took a good look at
yourself you would have to admit...
704
01:18:31,380 --> 01:18:35,900
you need a
lot of help!
- You're bald!
705
01:18:36,900 --> 01:18:41,060
At least I'm doing something with my hair.
Life! I... I'm not just sitting on...
706
01:18:41,060 --> 01:18:45,510
my duff like some people I know.
What you don't seem to realize, Rubin...
707
01:18:45,510 --> 01:18:48,050
is that
I am a real go-getter!
708
01:18:48,050 --> 01:18:51,060
Ha ha! There's no stoppin'
this train, pal!
709
01:18:51,060 --> 01:18:54,850
No siree Bob. I am on a collision
course. A head on collision...
710
01:18:54,850 --> 01:18:58,520
course with the brick wall of success!
711
01:19:03,470 --> 01:19:04,640
Think about it.
712
01:19:04,940 --> 01:19:07,340
Subtitles by Magiin.
August 2020.
56965