All language subtitles for Marry.Me.S01E08_English

GIL: Ugh,
organic food's gross.

Come on, dude.
Remember what
Dr. Ralsky said?

You got to turn
things around and get
on a healthier path.

Wait, Jake. How do you know
what Gil's doctor said?

Do you go to the doctor
with Gil?

JAKE: He just likes having
somebody there
with him.

I get freaked out at the doc,

so I don't always hear
what he says.

Like when I thought
he was telling me that

I was having a huge growth
spurt.

Yeah, he actually said,
"You have a huge
growth, sport."

Ah, here we go.
All right.

Let's go get you some fruits
and veggies

for this juicer, buddy.

Fine, but I really prefer
my fruits

rolled up by the foot
or in loop form.

So the way
Jake takes care of Gil,

too much or sweet? I can't tell.

What do you mean?
Sweet, right?

Mmm. I'll catch up
with you guys.

I need meat.

Whoa, I don't think so.

You told me not to let you
near Linda the butcher

since your torrid
affair ended.

Resisting the obvious
meat metaphors,

she really butchered
your heart out.

Damn it.
Seriously though.

You were severely depressed
for a very long time.

It wasn't that bad. Come on, girl.

Leave it alone. You know what?
You're right, Dennah.

Thank you.

69. No!

69.

Lock it down, woman. Hey!

Where's your dignity? Come on.

Wow, Gil,
your neighborhood's
really gotten a ton nicer

since they put in
this organic grocery store.

Yeah, it feels like they
can almost stop calling it

"Little Detroit."What can I say?

People seem to really like
the improvements.

I'm not one
of those people.

Tree trimmers come at,
like, 6:00 a.m.

and go to town
right outside my window.

What? It's illegal
to start that early.

Not to mention it's a full
two hours before you wake up,

smoke a bowl,
and go back to bed
for six hours.

I know. You know what?

Next time they come, call me.
I'll take care of everything. Thanks.

Now, let's go
unpack your groceries,

and I'll fix your
tax return

so the IRS stops
thinking you're a farm.

They think he's a farm.
Isn't that weird? Come on.

Thank you.

Okay to cross? Yeah, we're good.

Yeah, okay,
so maybe it's too much.

Maybe? It's a lot.

♪ Oh, no
Can't hold me back ♪

Oh, it's crazy.
Gil is so reliant on Jake.

It is super not
good for him. Yeah.

Since the divorce,
it's gotten totally
out of control.

When you guys get
married and have kids
in a couple years,

who knows who Gil
will turn to for help.

Some scam artist?

A child predator? A full-grown predator?

I bet Jake doesn't even
realize he's doing it.

Like how he whistles
while he eats
or casually militarizes

all our furniture. [DOOR OPENS]

Hello, Lieutenant couch. He does that?

Oh, what's up, my lady,
and my lady's ladies?

Jake, have a seat.

Sure. At ease, Corporal.

Wow, he does do that. Yup.

All right, what did I do?

So we think you're taking

way too much care of Gil,
and it's not healthy for him.

Yeah, we do. Thoughts?

Well, my first thought
is, "what?"

And my second thought is,
"Get out of town."

You get out of town.

I will not get out
of town.

I will die here. Not unless
I die here first.

Well, if you die here,
then I'm moving
to Alaska,

and I'm gonna
marry an eskimo.

Are you gonna have babies
with her?

Yeah, I'm gonna have
an igloo full,

and they're all gonna
be named Annie.

ANNIE: You're gonna be cold. Yeah, well,

I'm gonna get hot
when I think of you.

Guys, focus on
Jake and Gil's weirdness,

not your weirdness. Yes.

Sorry. Sorry about that.

Look, Gil doesn't
need me

anymore than
anybody's buddy

needs anybody else's buddy.

The point is, is if Gil
was here right now,

which why would he be,

he would tell you
the same exact thing.

[DOOR CLICKS]Oh, Jake, thank God.

I need help.
I tried to make juice,

but I couldn't assemble
the machine.

So I stopped at
Calamari Jack's

and went berserk
on a fisherman's dream bucket,

but I lost my wallet.

So can you swing by
and pay my tab for me?

And also,
can you call a locksmith?

'Cause my keys
were attached to my wallet.

Yeah, I see your point.

So here are your new keys,
and here's your new wallet,

and maybe in the future,
don't attach the thing that

you lose the most
to the thing that you
lose the second most.

That's smart. Smart. Yeah.

You know,
I should write that down.

Where is my pen?
You know what?

It's attached to my inhaler
and passport.

Okay. Look, Gil,
we need to talk.

Hey, before you
start all that,

let me just start
by saying thank you.

Thank you to you, Jake.

I don't say it enough.

I love you.

Oh, wow.

Guys don't say that
to each other,
and they should.

I love you too, man.

Um, listen, there's been
some chatter
in the community

that our relationship is,
I don't know.

People have been
throwing things
around like,

I've been taking too much
care of you,

or you're too dependent
on me, and... Wait, what?

[STAMMERS] That's cray.

Is it Cray, though?

I mean, you haven't really
been doing anything

since Cassie left you,
and maybe it's because

I've been doing it
for you, you know?

I'm basically the new Cassie

except I don't have sex
with you.

Which would make you
exactly like the old Cassie.

[BOTH LAUGH]

Nice. But look at this
apartment, man.

I mean,
it's a honking mess.

You got clothes
on the floor.

There's dishes in the sink.

You got dishes
in your clothes.

I mean,
how did this even happen?

Cassie kept
all the furniture.

So go out
and get new furniture.

Okay, yeah. Let's go buy some.
Next time, start with that.

No, no, no.
You need to do
that for you.

You need to start
taking care of yourself
like a normal adult.

Normal adult? Yes.

Is that your final answer,
Reg?

Well, that...
Reg wouldn't say,

"Is that
your final answer, Reg?"

He would say,
"Is that your
final answer?"

He would say it if the
contestant's name
were also Reg.

Yes, but that's
very specific.

When would he, like,
how often does that happen?

That's not what
you meant.

You know,
I only let you help me

because it seems like
you need it.

Face it, Jake.

You're obsessed with me.

[LAUGHS]
Wha...

I'm obsessed?
Are you... Yeah.

Okay, you know what? Yeah.

I just think we need
to take a step back.

Oh, you do? Yes.

Well, I think we need
to take two steps back.

How about 2 million?

'Cause I don't want
to speak to you no more.

[WHISTLES]

Wow, you're a real piece
of work.

Yeah, well,
you're a real piece

of what I work to push
out of my bottom.

That was clever and hurtful.

[BREATHING SHAKILY]

Oh, hey, babe.

Hey, snake. Snake?

Jake the snake. Hey, I'll take that.

How'd it go with Gil?

Honestly, I don't think
he took it too well.

I mean, I don't think
we've ever had a fight before.

I'm sure
everything will be fine.

Gil always does this.

He gets really mad,
and then he's over it.

Remember how mad
he got when

America's Funniest
Home Videos

didn't include him
in their nut shot montage?

Two days later, he was
right back out in the yard...

BOTH: Kicking himself
in the nuts again.

How does he even do it? I think you guys were right.

This definitely needed
to happen.

For sure.

And honestly,
I think the reason
Gil's so upset

is that deep down,
he knows he needs to
be more independent.

I need help.

Please, please, please.

I can't do anything
for myself.

My bills are all overdue.

My dry cleaning is
somewhere.

I can't even put together
the juicer Jake got me.

Now my produce has turned.

Dude, take it one step
at a time.

Start with the juicer.

It says "minimal assembly
required."

It should be easy.Yeah.

But I've screwed up
everything I ever

tried to build...
Like that shelf,

a healthy marriage...

I'm sorry, buddy,

but the answer is no.

Trust us.
It's for your own good.

[DOOR OPENS]

[SIGHS] [DOOR CLOSING]

Well, things
can't get any worse
than this.

Okay, that's actually
a little better.

That chair was
pretty uncomfortable.

So I got to figure out
who I am without Gil.

I mean, I knew who
Jake and Gil were,

and I knew who Gil
and Jake were,

and I knew who Jake, Gil,
and Mary were...

Our folk trio in college.

We had somewhat of
a regional hit

with major sweater,
minor corduroy.

So will Annie be back
any time soon?

Because I really just
stopped by to return
her casserole dish.

[DOOR OPENS]

Thank God. Hey, dad.

Oh, you brought
my dish back. Yeah.

How did the
lasagna turn out? Uh, pretty good.

We came in second place
at the Mr. Gay lasagna.

Oh, no.
Did Lorenzo win again?

Ours was tastier,
but his was much gayer.

Anyways, Jake and I
have just been discussing
his problems

with Gil, at length.

So if you're ready
to jump in,
I'd be happy to tag out.

Dad.

Okay, sweetie.

Jake, I think you're taking
this whole thing

with Gil way too hard.

You know,
he'll come back around.

I've seen the way
he looks at you.

I guess I just don't know
what to do with myself.

Like, today,
Gil and I would

normally go to the
violent movie theater

and watch a rare print
of Lady Ninjas 4.

That Time Of The
Month To Kill.

Well, what time's
it playing?
My dad would love to go...

No. But can't.

Oh.Look. This is
a good thing, okay?

You'll have more free time.
That's great.

Having free time
is the best.

I mean,
that's why I wake up
two hours early

every morning
and sit on the stairs.

You just sit
on the stairs, huh?

Yeah. You know,
there's a lot of stuff

that I've been meaning to do
that I haven't had time for.

That's the spirit.
I mean,

maybe you
and my dad could... No.

Bye.

He's, he's so busy.

[DOOR CLOSING]Is he?

[CHUCKLING NERVOUSLY]

Okay, just jump
off the cliff.
Here we go.

[MUMBLING]

[CHUCKLES]

[GASPS]

[WHEEZY LAUGH]
Yes!

Yes!
[CHORTLES]

Score one for
the Gil-Meister!

What are you looking at,
bills?

You're next.

Ugh, I really hate this new
birth control patch.

I feel bloated to a level
that can only

be described
as Val Kilmer-ian.

When I switched,
I had blurred vision
and day terrors,

but I stuck with it 'cause
my skin looks so damn good.

Yeah, you are glowing. [CELL PHONE JINGLES]

Really? That butcher?
I thought we agreed

you were gonna
delete her from
your phone.

Kay, she tried to
buy a horse with
your credit card.

No, she didn't try to buy
a horse with my credit card.

She succeeded. DENNAH: Delete the
butcher's number.

What if I have
a beef-based emergency
or a chicken situation?

It's for your own good,
girl.Girl.

Girl. Girl.

Girl. My girls.

Hey, hon.
What are you doing here?

Well, you said
I should do Jake,

and Jake wants to do
brunch with the ladies.

ANNIE: Oh. All right.

Let's brunch it up.

So what's the dish?
What's the dish?

Dish it to me. Come on.

Okay, well...

I'm sorry.
Just hold that thought.

Would you mind
if we switched seats?

I just have a thing
about having my back
to the door.

It's weird,
but it's real.

Seriously?

You know what?
Never mind, don't move.

I'll move. I'll move. What?

What are you... JAKE: Excuse me.

Ow. Jake. JAKE: I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry.

I'm sorry.
You know what it is?

You watch
The Godfather36 times,

you start to develop
these fears.

Ah, so much better.

Look at that.
I can see everybody.

If somebody comes in
with a gun,

I'll still get shot,
but I'll see it coming.

All right, come on,
let's get into it.

Let's hear it.
I'm just one of the gals.

Okay. Okay.

Well, I guess we were just

discussing how my birth
control patch makes me...

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Oh, no. No, we're eating.

We're eating, right?
So read the room.

Let's...
[CHUCKLES]

Know your audience, lady.
Um...

Kay, flow.
Let it flow.

Well, we were also debating
whether or not I should delete

the number of that butcher
I used to sip on.

The butcher? Yes.

Well, you should definitely
not delete that number.

I mean,
she's hot as hell, right?

Jake, she is crazy. Yeah, exactly.

I mean, crazy girls
are the most
explosive lovers.

Annie, can I get
a what-what
on that one?

Ew! Your man has a point.

She really knew
how to jiggle my gelatin.

Well, Jake,
you know what?

This has been really fun
having you hang with us,

but the three of us have
to head to our yoga class,
so rats.

Just rats!

Or no rats because
I signed up for the
yoga class too.

Hey, girls' day out.

[ROBOTIC VOICE]
Synchronizing periods now.

[IMITATING ROBOT BEEPING]

So Jake joining us
for brunch and yoga,
do we think

this is a one-time thing
or more of a continuous
burden?

I'm sure it's just until
he patches

things up with Gil,
which will be soon.

Whoo. Hey, guys.

This is gonna be great,
you know?

I've been looking for some
new hobbies now

that Gil and I are
completely done
for basically ever.

Wait, done?
What do you mean "Done"?

Have you not
talked at all? Nope. Yeah.

And I'm at peace
with it, you know?

I am good.
Good, good, good.

[CHUCKLES]

Guys, we may have
a bigger problem here.

This is the longest
Jake and Gil have gone
without talking.

Maybe in trying to fix Gil,
we broke Jake and Gil.

Yeah, but our plan
is kind of working.

I mean,
Gil's making real progress.

Have you seen his
Instagram?

He is making
a lot of juice. ANNIE: Wow.

And using Instagram.

His username is his
social security number,

but, yeah, for Gil, no,
this is super impressive.

Maybe we should just give
it a few more days.

I mean, it's Jake and Gil.
They're gonna be fine,
right?

I think you're right,
honestly. Whoa.

Watch your kicks, man.

Oh, sorry. Blew my braid back.

Hey, what if I have to pee?
Or is there an intermission?

You know what?
Actually,
don't worry about it.

I'm just nervous, I think.

Don't worry.
Just follow me.

I'm sort of the star
of the class.

My picture's
on the front page
of the studio's website.

Hey, hey, hey. Ringer.
[CHUCKLES]

Okay, everyone,
let's quiet the minds.

Hey, what's up, coach?
Jake.

New student here,
so take it easy on me.

Okay, Jake.

And now let's go
into downward dog.

If anyone needs any help,
you may ask myself

or my best and most
beautiful student, Dennah.

Hi, it's me.Hi, you.

I want you to know
that I do privates,

and you can interpret that
any way you want.

Well, how about
we interpret it together?

Are you even
a real yoga teacher?

Shh, Franny, please. It's Annie.

Uh, a little help?
I accidentally fell
upside down.

You accidentally slipped
into a textbook crow pose.

Here's what
I want you to do.
Slowly lower your legs.

JAKE: Lower my,
all right.

Okay, like this? I'm sorry.

I've never done yoga before.

Clearly. You're not supposed
to talk in here.

Dennah, please.
No talking in here.

I've actually never seen
this pose

executed
in a non-yurt setting.

May I please
take your photograph

for the front page
of the website?

No problem. Okay.

We got to get Jake and Gil
back together right now.

Oh, boy. Now I've done it.

Guys, this goes
against everything

I believe about yoga,
but give it up for Jake.

ALL: [CHANTING]
Jake!

I'll go get Gil,
and I'll meet you guys
at the grocery store.

Thank you.

Hey, yoga is stupid fun! STUDENTS: [CHANTING] Jake.

Wow, guys,
thank you so much

for letting me tag along
to yoga.

Yeah, awesome. Loved it.

Who knew I would be
such a natural, you know?

I mean, I'm like
Robert Redford in that movie.

The Natural?Yeah.

Of course The Natural.
What other movie would it be?

I mean, I literally
said the word "natural."

Whoa, what a strange
and unusual coincidence,
Gil.

Oh, my God...
Look who it is.

It's Jake and the gang.

Well, hello, Gilbert.
That side part new?

Actually, yes, it is.

It's a classic visual cue

to let people know
that I'm now doing well,

much like this
Eric Stonestreet
limited edition button down.

Speaking of visual cues,
feast your eyes on my
new yoga gear.

I mean,
could anything more clearly

indicate my newfound
spiritual health?

Om.
[CHUCKLES]

I wonder what's changed
in my life recently.

Well, while
we're all wondering...

Yeah? Why don't we all

check out the array

of healthy items
that I have in my cart.

I also pay my bills now
and have an active knowledge

of where my dry cleaning
is at all times. Mmm-hmm.

Wow, really, really
interesting stuff
from both parties.

Why don't you guys
get a beer,

and just continue
the convo, you know?

"This is what I've been
up to," and if it sort of
inches towards a kiss,

well, then,

you know, it does,
and I don't need to know.

No, I don't think
we're gonna kiss,
thank you.

We're both doing gangbusters
without each other,

so we should probably just
leave it that way.

Agree to agree.

Annie, there might be
one kiss

when Jake kisses
my big, brown butt.

Peace be upon you. Oh, and also upon you.

All upon you.

Okay.Namaste.

Now, nama-go.

That's fine. Thank you.

I'll see you later. I don't think we will.

[BOTH SCOFFING REPEATEDLY]

Ugh! GIL: Ehh!

Jake, wait. You know what?

I can't deal with
all this bad energy
right now.

I am coming off
my worst yoga class
of the season,

and I got to just...
I just got to...
I got to just...

[SIGHS]69.

Ah.

69?

Do y'all
even have other numbers?

Hey, where you been,
girl?

Well, you left me alone
with Linda the butcher,

so I went home with
4 pounds of top sirloin

and 110 pounds of
sexual fury.

Oh, no. Oh, yeah.

And our relationship
is toxic.

Toxic to the tune of
she robbed me.

Again? Yes!

Why'd you leave me,
Dennah?

I had to find
another yoga class

since Jake ruined
the first one.

And seriously, girl,
where is your willpower?

You are my willpower. ANNIE: Whoa, guys.

Guys, look at us, okay?

We didn't just screw up
Jake and Gil's friendship.

We screwed up the entire
"Annie, Jake, kay, Dennah,
Gil" dynamic.

It's like the bees.

Is that some sort of
slang way of saying
it's the worst?

No, bitch.

I have a degree in
environmental science
from Stanford.

Make one small change
in an ecosystem,

and it causes
a ripple effect that
changes everything.

Oh, I learned about that
on Real Time with Bill Maher.

Thomas Friedman thinks
it's happening,

but Nicki Minaj disagrees.

We never should've
played God. What are we
supposed to do now?

The only thing we can do.

We play God again to undo
our original God playing.

We need Gil to need
Jake again.

Yeah, but what does Gil
need help with?

Apparently nothing
these days.

Okay. Well,
he's super into building
things right now.

What if we found
something really difficult
for him to build?

BOTH: Ikea. A bomb.

I mean, yeah, ikea.

Ooh, they have an odda
with an adjustable gangjarn.

What? It's an armoire

with adjustable gangjarn.

According to this
customer review,

the building process was
"needlessly infuriating."

Perfect. Okay.

So when Gil crashes
and burns,

he'll have no one
to turn to but Jake.

Guys, I want to apologize
for the bomb thing.

I was just trying to
think of stuff that's hard
to build, you know?

I should've said,
"A healthy relationship"

or "ikea," which turned out
to be the right answer.

Thank you for apologizing,
'cause it was really weird.

"Dear Gil.
We're so proud of you.

"Please enjoy this armoire.

"Love, Annie, Dennah,
and Kay."

[CLICKS TONGUE] Aw.

I could really use
an armoire,

and I've always wanted
adjustable gangjarn.

♪ I got the eye of the tiger

♪ A fighter

♪ Dancing through the fire

♪ 'cause I am a champion

♪ And you're gonna
hear me roar ♪

[CAMERA SHUTTER SNAPS]

Now, to share you
with the world.

[YAWNS]

[GROANS]

[MACHINERY HUMMING]

No!

Come on.

I don't believe it. Hmm? What? What?

Oh, I'm sorry.
Did I have another
wet dream?

I need to stop watching
Golden Girlsbefore
we go to bed.

No. Gil.
He built the armoire.

I can't believe it. What?

Hey, he's actually
doing stuff.

I'm so proud
of our little meatball.

Then call him.No.

I mean, if this isn't proof
I was holding him back,

then I don't know what is.

He's better off without me.

He's not better off
without you.

He's just better off
not relying entirely
on you.

[PHONE RINGS]

Hey, it's Gil. Answer it.

Answer it. Answer it. Okay.

Hello?

Can I help you?

Can you, you called me.

Listen, bro.
We can sit around here

all day debating
who called me.

Not a debate.
You called me. Or we can get together

and talk like men.

All right, yeah.

Okay, how about
this afternoon?

Now is great.

It's 6:00 in the morning,
but... Yeah.

So come meet me
at Fifth and a Maple.

Okay. Wait.
Fifth and Maple
don't intersect.

Oh, Fifth and a Maple.

Yeah, I get it.

How did you even
get up there?

Well, the tree
trimmers were

doing their thing
at 6:00 a.m.,

so I confronted them.

They quickly surrounded me,

and then I ran up the
ladder to get away.

Sure. But they outsmarted me
by removing it.

Wow. Shocking how much
your life resembles cartoons.

Need some help?

Yeah, I'd like that.

You got it.

Go, daddy.

Hey, little buddy.
What's up?

Oh, you know,
just hanging.

Ah. Listen,

I'm sorry for how
I've been acting.

You were only looking out
for me.

Yeah, but I'm sorry,
you know?

I was probably a little bit
harsh.

God, it's always
the same old story with me.

One step forwards,
two steps stuck in a tree.

Yeah, but you're
doing better, buddy.

I mean, the house
is all cleaned up.

Your shirts and your pots
are all stored separately.

You done did good.

Thanks. All right.

Oh, you.
Can you get me
out of here?

GIL: Now, this is
a very special juice for me.

I call it The Jake.

Oh, thanks, buddy.

After Jake Gyllenhaal. Ah.

He lives on this stuff.

It is so good
to see you two
back together.

We never
should've meddled.

Or let me throw out
one other option.

Did we sort of knock it
out of the park?

'Cause I think we did. DENNAH: We kind of did.

Gil is killing it.
This place looks awesome.

Seriously,
when did this happen?

Well, high on the success
of my armoire assembly,

I decided to just keep
riding that wave all the way

into building
a new dinette set.

So, thanks to you guys.

We should play
God more often.

We're like
three beautiful oprahs.

Perfectly dressed. On a budget.

Impeccably fragranced,
and so beautifully...

[ALL SCREAM]

Oh!

Oh, my God. Seriously?

That really hurt.

So there were a lot
of extra screws...