All language subtitles for Bunkd s04e08.WEB-DL.x264-ION10

¶¶

We're almost done
with our brush-up
on counselor duties.

Noah, can you tell me
the motto for cleaning
the kitchen?

"Sloppy Sundays
cause Moldy
Mondays."

Yes. So, to recap,
scrubbing the canoes?

Counselor problem.
Bathroom duty?
Counselor problem.

The other kind
of bathroom doodies?

Also a counselor
problem.

Lou, you might
wanna watch
out for that...

I know, I know.
Language.

Oh, no,
I mean...

Who dug a hole
in the middle of
the lawn?

That sounds
like a director
problem.

ALL: ¶ Kikiwaka, Kikiwaka

¶ Kikiwaka, Kikiwaka

¶ Kikiwaka, Kikiwaka ¶

Woodchucks, you know
why I'm here.

Ooh, you're in
trouble.

Actually,
they're getting
honored.

Ooh, you're
getting honored.

Not as fun.

Ladies, now that
you're all showered

and fed after
your big night,

I can officially
induct you

into the sacred Order
of the Muskrat.

They get
a medal for that?

Anybody can go
online and order
a muskrat.

I've got a weasel
coming next Tuesday.

She means
we completed the
Muskrat Challenge.

It's where you spend
the night in the woods,

with no supplies except
a newspaper and a raw,
unpeeled potato.

Very off-brand for me,
but I did it.

I'm so proud.

We Woodchucks have
a tradition of being
tough.

Now, if you'll excuse me,
I napped weird

and need the nurse
to rub out my ouchie.

This medal
is so cool.

Ugh, old me would
not be friends with
new me.

You guys jealous?

So you were in
the woods all night

with only a potato.
Big deal.

Well, you guys
couldn't do it.

You won't even
sit on the grass
without a blanket.

It's pokey.

You know
what?

We Grizzlies are way
tougher than you.

We can do
that challenge.

We can.

We can?

We can.

That's right.
He got there.

No way
you Grizzlies

can handle it
out in the woods.

You wouldn't even
last a minute.

Unless you really
applied yourself,

because I think
you're pretty
capable people.

That's not how
you trash talk.

You've gotta say
something mean.

Oh, my bad.

I hope a bobcat
rips out your guts
while you sleep.

Split the difference.

What is
doing this?

It's probably
the government

recovering
underground
surveillance.

I was going
to say
a big gopher.

That's why
you're a target.

Anywho. We need
to trap this thing.

Then I'm your girl.

You want a net,
a cage, a snare?
What's your poison?

You want poison?
Too far? Not far
enough?

Remind me to
never cross you.

Hey, guys,

we woke up itching
pretty bad.

Yeah,
and we have a very
unflattering rash

all over our arms.

Oh, boy, you two
got Red Leaf.

You must have
brushed some

while we were doing
the Challenge in
the forest.

See? This is
why I never do
anything, ever.

Is it serious?

You know what
they say,

"Leaf of red,
soon you're dead."

BOTH: What?

Ha, I'm kidding.
You'll live.

But it is
contagious, so...

You're
quarantining us
for two days?

I have to,
but don't worry,

I left you plenty of
board games and food.
You'll be fine.

Five pounds of
beaver jerky

does not make
everything "fine."

Okay,
Grizzlies,

tomorrow we go forth
to complete

the Order of the Muskrat.
Who's excited?

Noah, the girls
aren't here,
you can drop the act.

You know we can't survive
a night in the woods.
We're doomed.

Come on.

This is more of
a mental game
than a physical one.

A bear's not going
to attack us
"mentally."

It's just
one night.

With only a raw potato
and a newspaper.

I hope nobody
did the sudoku.

Guys. Do you really
want the girls

making fun of us
for the rest of
the summer?

BOTH: No.

Then let me hear
your toughest
Grizzly growl.

BOTH: (WEAKLY) Roar.

I can't hear you.
Again, and mean it
this time.

BOTH: Roar.

Ooh, that hurt
my back.

Next time
we'll stretch.

GWEN: We caught something.

Good job,
Gwen.

Uh-oh, I think
it's human.

Get me out
of this thing.

It's not human.

It's Hazel.

Hi. Got a pair
of scissors?

Aw, man,

I had my heart
set on a giant skunk,
not some rando.

I'm not a rando.

These are my old
stomping grounds.

Stomped on a lot
of annoying campers
around here.

Ah, memories.

Okay, Hazel,
why are you here?

Can't a former
Kikiwakan

come by for
a friendly visit?

Yes, but you're
not friendly, so, no.

Hazel used to be
the head counselor
here.

But she hasn't been
asked back in two years.

For no good
reason.

What? How about
you turned your
campers into monsters,

you terrorized
my best friend,

and, oh, yeah,
you burned down
half the cabins.

Everyone makes
a little oopsie
once in a while.

Hazel, did you dig
these holes?

Me?
Of course not.

I just wanted to know
if I could stay for
a night or two.

I was going through
my Aunt Gladys'
old Kikiwaka stuff,

and it made me miss
all the fun I had at camp.

But I guess now
that you're Director,

trapping humans
is the new
lanyard making?

So you expect me
to believe

that you came
all the way here

just for
a friendly visit?

Of course. I treasured
my time at this camp.

Okay...

The boys are on
their Muskrat
Challenge trip.

You can sleep
in their cabin.

Thank you.

Just so you know,
my poison offer
is still on the table.

I know Hazel
dug these holes.

She's up
to something.

Darkness lurks
beneath those
pigtails.

And I'm not just
talking about
her roots.

Meow.
Kitty got claws.

Ugh. All my friends
are out there
having fun

and I'm missing
everything.

(GASPS)

Julie Gardner
is braiding Amy's hair
instead of me?

Hope she enjoys
the two mangy
ferrets look.

So what if you miss
somebody's messy
hair day,

or somebody
dumping their
boyfriend...

Shelly broke up
with Dave again?

What do you know?
Tell me. Tell me!

Okay, calm down.

We're going to get
your mind off what's
going on outside,

by having
some fun inside.

How? I feel like
I'm going to scratch

my outsides until
I get to my insides.

We can do
a domino rally.

My brothers and I
used to do this
on snow days,

or when we'd been
too rowdy, and
our mom did this...

"Get out!"

So, do you
wanna play?

No, thanks.

I'm just going
to stare out
the window

and watch life happen
to everyone but me.

Well, at least
you're not being
dramatic about it.

(MOSQUITO BUZZING)
(GRUNTS)

Ugh, these
mosquitos are
biting me like crazy.

Curse my sweet musk.

Guys,
it's getting dark,

and I cannot
start this fire.

And I chipped
my tooth on
the potato.

Forget it.

We're never going
to make it out here.

Let's just
go back to camp.

No, we can't let
the Woodchucks win.

We're Grizzlies.
We never say die.

(RUSTLING)

We're gonna die!

Hello.

ALL: Huh?

Apologies.
I didn't mean
to scare you.

I'm Ms. Tilly.

Oh, I've seen
the billboard
for your inn.

"Don't be silly,
stay with Ms. Tilly."

Had to change
my name to make
that one work.

What are you doing
out here?

I was sipping on
some chamomile tea

when I thought
I heard a baby
crying in the forest.

That's weird,
Matteo.

You were just
crying in the
forest.

Thanks,
friend.

We're from
Camp Kikiwaka.

We're here
to rough it in
the woods all night.

Or starve.
Whichever
comes first.

You poor little
chipmunks.

You must come
to my inn for
some hot cocoa.

Can we, Noah?

Please? Just for
a few minutes.

No. Thank you,
Ms. Tilly,

but as kind
as the offer is,

we set out to rough it,
and rough it we will.

Did I mention
the mini
marshmallows?

Okay, maybe
just one hot cocoa.

(SNORING)

Somewhere in
that cabin is
a clue

as to why Hazel's here,
and I'm gonna find it.

As long as we don't
have to search
Finn's nasty bunk.

Ugh, I hear ya.

It looks like
the world's
tiniest carnival

skipped town
in the middle of
the night.

(SNORING)

Ow. Christina Aguilera,
that hurt.

Shh.
Stay quiet.

I know
what I'm doing.

(CLATTERING)

Do you?

Look,
she's holding
something.

Maybe it's
a clue.

(SNORING)

(SOFTLY)
Take a picture
of the paper.

Huh?

Take a picture
of the paper.

I can't believe
what a sound
sleeper Hazel is.

Yeah, having
no conscience
will do that to you.

You sure you don't
want in on this?

I'm trying to see what
I'm missing out on.

Come on, watch me
set this thing off.

It'll be fun.

Fine.

Timber.

Huh. That wasn't
as lame as I thought
it would be.

Stop, I'm blushing.

You know, we still got
a lot more time in here.

You sure you don't
want to help me
set up another one?

You know what
would make it
cooler?

If it was bigger.
A lot bigger.

Uh-oh. Have I created
a monster?

Nah.

Not unless there's
a prize and you're
standing in my way.

No, there's no prize.

Then we're good.

It looks like
an old map
of the camp.

What do you think
it leads to?

Hazel said something
suspicious earlier.

She said she
"treasured" her
time at camp.

I think it's
a treasure map.

There's a treasure
at camp?

Why didn't you
tell me?

It's gonna be mine,
all mine.

(LAUGHS MANIACALLY)

Sorry, I don't know
where that came from.

Yeah.

Legend has it,
Jedediah buried
gold...

Gold!

I think I got it
out of my system now.

Anyway, there was
a map

and I bet Hazel
found it with her
aunt's stuff.

But if Hazel
has a map,

why is she digging
so many holes?

This says the treasure
is located 10 paces
from the story post.

But what Hazel
doesn't know

is the post
was moved when
the septic tank

sprang a leak.

Aw, because
you didn't want
to get septic goo

on a beloved
camp landmark?

No, we used
the post
to plug the hole.

Anyway, my point is,
the post is now

located 10 feet south
of where it used to be,

which means
the treasure
would be...

Under the
boys' cabin.

Which was only built
a few years ago.

That gold belongs
to the camp.

We can use it
to buy a new
septic tank.

Let's be honest,
that post is not
going to hold back

that flood of
nightmares forever.

Yep, this is
good cocoa.

Ms. Tilly's
is amazing.

I can't believe
a place like this
exists in the woods.

We should
stay here for...

Ever.

Okay, it's time
to go.

Remember,
we're supposed
to be roughing it.

But I am
roughing it.

My cocoa is kind
of hot, so I have
to do this.

(BLOWS)

Grizzlies,
we're leaving.

I've got more
scones.

I'll take two,
please.

I got it.

Huh. There's something
kind of familiar about
this thing...

That's mine.

Gwen. You were
supposed to be
on the lookout.

Look out.

Well, I guess
you learned
my little secret.

I was digging
for something.

So give it!

No way.
This belongs
to the camp.

No, it doesn't.

I knew you were
lying about
why you were here.

You've always
been evil.

Um, where's
the gold?

What gold?
I was never
looking for gold.

But you had
Jedediah's map.

What? I drew
that map.

I remember
this now.

A lanyard.

Cootie catchers.
Painted rocks.

It's all just
a bunch of junk.

It's not junk
to me.

Is that
you and Hazel?

Our first summer
at Camp Kikiwaka.

This is
the time capsule

we buried
that year.

You guys were
friends?

Best friends.

I hope this works.

The hatchet was
a great touch.

Should we be worried
that Gwen sleeps
with one

under her pillow?

No, but I am
a little worried about

the list of names
she keeps with it.

So, you ready
to start this?

Wait, I want to add
a few more things.

We can use
my curling iron

to knock over
my crimping iron

to knock over
my flat iron.

That is a great idea.

I knew all your
pointless hair stuff

was good
for something.

GWEN: Ava? Destiny?

That was awesome.

BOTH: No!

Guys, that was so cool.
You should've been here.

Anyway,

Lou says you're not
contagious anymore,

so you can
come out now.

I can't believe it.
We missed it.

On the bright side,

at least
you're finally free

to go out there
and get your
life back.

You can find out
about the braids,

or who the ferret's
dating.

I'm sorry, sometimes
I don't listen when
you talk.

Or we could just
stay inside and
rebuild everything.

Really?

Yeah.

Spending two days
with you creating
something

that turned out
to be all for nothing

ended up being
more fun than
I thought.

I think there's
a compliment

somewhere in there
and I'll take it.

We fell asleep.

We fell asleep.

Guys, wake up.

It's morning?
How did this
happen?

And why is there
still quiche
in my hand?

Ooh. I'll trade you
some couch scones

for some
hand quiche.

We failed
the challenge.

The girls are going
to make fun of us
forever.

No, they won't.

Because they're never
going to find out.

We just need
to look like
we roughed it.

Matteo, put some
strawberry jam
on your elbow to look

like you
scraped it.

This is
brambleberry.

Just do it.

Finn, rub some cocoa
powder on yourself
to look dirty.

Dirty and delicious.
I'm on it.

Good morning.
Breakfast nummies?

Don't look her
directly in
the eye.

If we're not careful,
she'll keep us fed
and warm forever.

Stay back,
you hospitable
sorceress.

Thank you,
Ms. Tilly.

Hazel, are you
in here?

I can see
your pigtails.

Dang it.

They always
give me away.

That and my
lilting voice.

I can't believe
you came all
the way here

just to get
that time capsule.

Why is that
so hard to believe?

I miss this place.

I miss the cabins,

I miss the campfire,

but what I've missed
the most are my friends.

Especially my
ex-best friend.

I thought that first
summer was
a distant memory

after you put
scorpion-filled balloons
in my bathroom.

Well, I was jealous
of your friendship
with Xander.

And you know
what they say,

love means never
having to say
you're sorry

for putting weird stuff
in balloons.

Yeah, they've never
said that.

Okay,

I'm sorry.

I admit I wasn't exactly
easy to stay friends with.

Look, I don't expect us
to ever be besties again,

but I just wanted
to have this
time capsule

to remind me of
a summer when
we weren't enemies.

You know,
we don't have
to be enemies.

But you don't
like me.

That's why
I didn't tell you

I was coming back
for the time capsule.

I knew you wouldn't
understand.

Hazel,
I do like you.

I just don't like
the scorpion balloons

and the camp-burning,
and the hole-digging.

But underneath
all that,

deep, deep
underneath
all that,

is a girl that I
miss being friends
with, too.

Really?

Does this mean
I can come back
and visit sometime?

That would be
something

you could infer from
what I said.

(LAUGHS) Yay.
Thank you.

I have to go now,
but when I come back,

we are going to have
so much fun.

Somehow I'm more
scared now

than I was when
we were enemies.

Welcome back
to camp,
Grizzly cabin.

You did it.

You're now members
of the Order of
the Muskrat.

We were so
impressed,
we asked Lou

if we could
give you
your medals.

And she very
generously said,

"Whatever.
Then it's off
my plate."

I've got
to hand it to you.

I never thought
you could rough it
like that.

Yeah, I thought
you'd get mauled
by a bear,

and we'd be there
now picking up
bloody scraps.

Then why would
you let us go?

Seriously, we never
should have doubted
you, guys.

Great job.

Thanks.

Okey-dokey,
we're gonna
go wash up.

As you see,
we are dirty.

Not yet. You have
to tell us all about
your night.

Where did you sleep?
What did you use
the newspaper for?

Finn, are you licking
dirt off of your arm?

Yes, I am.

Because...

Because we were
roughing it so hard,
we had to eat dirt.

The wilderness
changes a man.

Matteo, the blood
on your elbow has

seeds in it.

It's brambleberry jam.

What if it
was blood?

Then I wouldn't
put it on toast.

What's actually
going on here?

We didn't
rough it, okay?

We spent the entire
night drinking
hot cocoa

and eating quiche
at Ms. Tilly's Inn.

Who is Ms. Tilly?

The kindest,
most evil hostess
in the whole world.

Her couch is so soft,
we're lucky we escaped.

You didn't
rough it?

Lou!

Can't you just
give them
the medals?

Why does everything
around here have
to end in screaming?

The boys didn't even
do the challenge.

They stayed
at some cushy inn.

It's true.

We don't deserve
these medals.

I'm not gonna take
your medals.

BOTH: You're not?

Ms. Tilly invites everyone
doing the Muskrat Challenge
to her inn.

When I went,
I drank so
much cocoa,

I peed chocolate
for a week.

Ooh. Something
to look forward to.

Ms. Tilly is the Order
of the Muskrat's
best-kept secret.

You didn't tell us
to find her.

Oh, you don't find
Ms. Tilly.

She finds you.

Well, she never
found us.

Right?

Now that
I think about it,

I did hear something
rustling in the bushes,
and I threw rocks at it.

Maybe it was
a deer.

A deer that says
"Hello."

Fantastic.

So we actually did
the challenge,

and what do we have
to show for it besides
a disgusting rash?

A sense of
achievement?

Achievement-
shmievement.

Come here.
I'm lickin'
that arm.