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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,162 WWW.MY-SUBS.COM 1 00:00:04,540 --> 00:00:06,919 Liza! Liza, come here, quick! 2 00:00:06,920 --> 00:00:08,620 What's wrong? What is it? 3 00:00:08,720 --> 00:00:10,680 The curators for the Whitney Biennial just called! 4 00:00:10,720 --> 00:00:12,020 I've been chosen for their next show! 5 00:00:12,040 --> 00:00:13,840 - Oh, my God! - It's like the Super Bowl 6 00:00:13,850 --> 00:00:15,019 of the art world. 7 00:00:15,020 --> 00:00:16,940 - It finally happened! - Oh! Whoo-hoo! 8 00:00:17,040 --> 00:00:18,736 They're gonna announce it tonight at a cocktail party. 9 00:00:18,760 --> 00:00:20,800 Is it too early for champagne? 10 00:00:20,840 --> 00:00:22,040 Mimosas are breakfast-y. 11 00:00:22,100 --> 00:00:23,880 Let's just hold the OJ. 12 00:00:23,900 --> 00:00:25,000 - Yeah! - Yes! 13 00:00:25,080 --> 00:00:27,020 Whoo! Okay. 14 00:00:28,540 --> 00:00:30,860 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.MY-SUBS.com -- 15 00:00:32,080 --> 00:00:33,719 "ARTnews" is reporting that 16 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:35,799 Maggie Amato is a last-minute addition 17 00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:36,930 to the Whitney Biennial. 18 00:00:36,940 --> 00:00:38,240 - Isn't she your roommate? - Yes. 19 00:00:38,250 --> 00:00:39,670 There's a cocktail party tonight. 20 00:00:39,770 --> 00:00:42,160 I know, Liza. I'm a Fellow. 21 00:00:42,200 --> 00:00:44,699 I'd bring you, but I have a date. 22 00:00:44,700 --> 00:00:46,430 - Enzo? - Yes. 23 00:00:46,530 --> 00:00:49,060 I'm bringing a blue collar companion to a black tie event. 24 00:00:50,050 --> 00:00:52,520 Well, at least I'll finally meet this Maggie. 25 00:00:52,530 --> 00:00:54,940 Finally. Yay. 26 00:00:55,930 --> 00:00:57,240 Morning, Diana. 27 00:00:57,520 --> 00:00:58,980 Liza. 28 00:00:59,450 --> 00:01:01,450 Coffee, anyone? 29 00:01:02,370 --> 00:01:05,230 Um, table any marketing plans 30 00:01:05,330 --> 00:01:07,000 for Chrissie Hart's memoir. 31 00:01:07,020 --> 00:01:08,980 We still don't have pages. 32 00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:10,470 The Chrissie Hart? 33 00:01:10,580 --> 00:01:12,820 I loved her music. 34 00:01:12,880 --> 00:01:15,670 The, uh, pitch was so extraordinary. 35 00:01:15,770 --> 00:01:18,470 Maybe we got blinded by the bidding war. 36 00:01:18,570 --> 00:01:20,880 I mean, since Chrissie missed her delivery date, 37 00:01:20,890 --> 00:01:23,190 we could claim breach of contract and walk away. 38 00:01:23,290 --> 00:01:25,550 A rock and roll tell-all from Chrissie Hart? 39 00:01:25,650 --> 00:01:27,340 This could be the next "Just Kids." 40 00:01:28,930 --> 00:01:30,310 I don't want to lose this book. 41 00:01:30,410 --> 00:01:32,410 Let's... let's set up a Skype call. 42 00:01:34,890 --> 00:01:36,300 "Let's" means you. 43 00:01:36,320 --> 00:01:37,320 Yes. 44 00:01:40,380 --> 00:01:43,240 We need to see pages, Chrissie. 45 00:01:43,490 --> 00:01:44,820 What stage are you at? 46 00:01:44,900 --> 00:01:46,720 It's written. 47 00:01:47,060 --> 00:01:48,319 See? 48 00:01:48,320 --> 00:01:50,230 Whole thing. 49 00:01:50,330 --> 00:01:52,070 I swear to God, I just, like, 50 00:01:52,170 --> 00:01:53,800 punctured the skin, 51 00:01:53,820 --> 00:01:55,320 it came oozing out of me. 52 00:01:55,380 --> 00:01:57,390 Well, can you... 53 00:01:57,490 --> 00:01:59,080 sop it up and email it? 54 00:01:59,140 --> 00:02:00,640 Wh... what, on the internet? 55 00:02:00,760 --> 00:02:02,260 What, are you high? 56 00:02:02,280 --> 00:02:03,440 I'm not sending this on the internet. 57 00:02:03,450 --> 00:02:04,740 I don't trust the internet. 58 00:02:04,840 --> 00:02:07,420 Those naked pictures of me, those were leaked. 59 00:02:07,480 --> 00:02:09,399 Nothing is safe. 60 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:10,899 Julian Assange told me that. 61 00:02:10,900 --> 00:02:13,719 I mean, he was out of his mind at the time, 62 00:02:13,720 --> 00:02:15,860 but he made some pretty solid arguments. 63 00:02:15,960 --> 00:02:17,820 We could send a messenger? 64 00:02:17,920 --> 00:02:19,820 Yeah, now you're talking, man. 65 00:02:19,920 --> 00:02:21,500 Why don't you send Charles? 66 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:23,320 Charles, huh? 67 00:02:23,360 --> 00:02:26,580 I would like to hand my baby, 68 00:02:26,620 --> 00:02:29,120 my book, to the man I made the deal with. 69 00:02:29,200 --> 00:02:30,200 Of course. 70 00:02:30,220 --> 00:02:32,519 I'll come up to Shelter Island today. 71 00:02:32,520 --> 00:02:33,940 All right. 72 00:02:34,700 --> 00:02:36,800 See you in a bit. 73 00:02:37,960 --> 00:02:39,860 Charles, I will cancel my plans, 74 00:02:39,960 --> 00:02:41,700 brave the deer ticks, and accompany you. 75 00:02:42,780 --> 00:02:44,370 I know a very quaint bed and breakfast. 76 00:02:44,380 --> 00:02:46,980 We can bike to Chrissie's house. 77 00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,900 I can handle it, but, uh... 78 00:02:49,000 --> 00:02:51,080 this book better be good. 79 00:02:54,040 --> 00:02:56,380 Thoughts on Jake's first chapter? 80 00:02:56,460 --> 00:02:57,780 You first. 81 00:02:57,800 --> 00:02:59,279 How can Obama's speech writer, 82 00:02:59,280 --> 00:03:01,519 with the skills to evoke passion and pride, 83 00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:03,020 write this snooze fest? 84 00:03:03,120 --> 00:03:04,980 - It definitely needs work. - Work? 85 00:03:05,080 --> 00:03:06,570 If the rest of his book reads like this, 86 00:03:06,580 --> 00:03:07,580 we're screwed. 87 00:03:07,600 --> 00:03:08,816 All right, let's get him on the phone. 88 00:03:08,840 --> 00:03:10,520 Okay, you're too fired up. 89 00:03:10,560 --> 00:03:11,780 I will email him notes. 90 00:03:11,820 --> 00:03:14,720 He's been to Afghanistan. He can handle a call. 91 00:03:19,040 --> 00:03:20,639 Hey, I was just thinking about you. 92 00:03:20,640 --> 00:03:22,280 I just checked into the hotel. 93 00:03:22,380 --> 00:03:25,460 Jake, um, it's Kelsey and Zane, 94 00:03:25,480 --> 00:03:27,740 - your editors. - Uh, oh, hey. 95 00:03:27,840 --> 00:03:29,136 Sorry, I thought this was somebody else. 96 00:03:29,160 --> 00:03:30,700 What... um, what's up? 97 00:03:30,800 --> 00:03:33,060 We're calling to discuss your chapter. 98 00:03:33,140 --> 00:03:35,350 It's... it's a solid start, and we both... 99 00:03:35,360 --> 00:03:37,620 You're a busy man, so let's cut to the chase. 100 00:03:37,720 --> 00:03:39,060 It needs more energy. 101 00:03:39,140 --> 00:03:40,620 Humor, scandal. All right? 102 00:03:40,630 --> 00:03:43,080 We're competing with Russian hookers and golden showers. 103 00:03:44,740 --> 00:03:46,960 Uh... okay. 104 00:03:48,440 --> 00:03:50,160 Uh, Kelsey, what do you think? 105 00:03:54,140 --> 00:03:56,440 I... I think Zane's right. 106 00:03:56,540 --> 00:04:00,520 It could benefit from some insightful observations 107 00:04:00,620 --> 00:04:02,799 paired with cherry-picked anecdotes 108 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:04,499 about your time spent in the White House. 109 00:04:04,500 --> 00:04:06,800 Wh... what we're saying is, 110 00:04:07,140 --> 00:04:09,240 goose this shit up. 111 00:04:09,430 --> 00:04:11,450 Right now, it's meek and kind of bland. 112 00:04:11,550 --> 00:04:13,080 I don't really like your tone, Zane. 113 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:14,289 I don't like your chapter. 114 00:04:14,290 --> 00:04:16,000 Jake, we're gonna call you back. 115 00:04:17,230 --> 00:04:18,690 You realize you're not getting paid 116 00:04:18,790 --> 00:04:20,439 to lose authors here, right? 117 00:04:20,440 --> 00:04:21,599 I'm playing bad cop, all right? 118 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:22,780 You're too easy on him. 119 00:04:23,290 --> 00:04:25,230 Let me carry the ball here. 120 00:04:25,330 --> 00:04:27,230 Trust me. I know how to handle him. 121 00:04:27,330 --> 00:04:28,419 You better, okay? 122 00:04:28,420 --> 00:04:30,010 This book is all I have right now. 123 00:04:30,050 --> 00:04:32,050 Then let me do my job. 124 00:05:01,780 --> 00:05:03,590 Hello? 125 00:05:16,960 --> 00:05:18,190 Chrissie? 126 00:05:18,290 --> 00:05:20,140 Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. 127 00:05:20,150 --> 00:05:21,910 Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, yeah. 128 00:05:21,970 --> 00:05:23,490 That's good. No, no, no. Not too much. 129 00:05:23,530 --> 00:05:24,790 Dude. Dude, dude, dude, dude. 130 00:05:24,890 --> 00:05:27,190 That was so intense. 131 00:05:27,290 --> 00:05:28,590 I mean, oh, my God. 132 00:05:29,260 --> 00:05:30,840 Hey, man. How you doing? 133 00:05:32,250 --> 00:05:33,990 Hi. 134 00:05:34,090 --> 00:05:37,070 Thank you for the, uh, the invitation. 135 00:05:37,170 --> 00:05:38,550 Oh, yeah. My pleasure, man. 136 00:05:38,650 --> 00:05:40,110 - Thanks for coming out. - Yeah. 137 00:05:40,210 --> 00:05:41,929 So I would love to return to the city 138 00:05:41,930 --> 00:05:43,830 - with the book tonight, so... - Wait, can I... 139 00:05:43,930 --> 00:05:45,430 before we talk business, 140 00:05:45,530 --> 00:05:47,589 I need your honest opinion about something, 141 00:05:47,590 --> 00:05:49,820 because my people are never straight with me. 142 00:05:50,170 --> 00:05:52,240 Um, sure. 143 00:05:52,420 --> 00:05:54,590 I want you to taste my booch. 144 00:05:54,690 --> 00:05:57,070 I'm sorry. Your what? Your boo... 145 00:05:59,170 --> 00:06:00,240 Mirna! 146 00:06:01,690 --> 00:06:02,830 What did I say? 147 00:06:02,930 --> 00:06:04,270 When the guests appear, 148 00:06:04,370 --> 00:06:06,230 freshly brewed Kombucha tea. 149 00:06:06,330 --> 00:06:07,990 Check it out. 150 00:06:08,160 --> 00:06:09,360 Thank you. 151 00:06:14,420 --> 00:06:16,140 What do you think? 152 00:06:17,770 --> 00:06:19,220 Strong. 153 00:06:19,280 --> 00:06:20,710 All right, dude. Hit me. 154 00:06:20,810 --> 00:06:22,520 Ten more hertz. Ease me into it. 155 00:06:22,530 --> 00:06:25,590 Oh, God. Ahh-rah! 156 00:06:34,610 --> 00:06:37,540 This is next-level, Mags. 157 00:06:37,560 --> 00:06:39,590 You have officially arrived. 158 00:06:39,690 --> 00:06:41,870 I am so proud of you. 159 00:06:44,290 --> 00:06:45,460 Hey... what? 160 00:06:45,500 --> 00:06:47,470 I don't know, I... 161 00:06:47,570 --> 00:06:49,940 I guess I just stopped dreaming about this, you know? 162 00:06:49,970 --> 00:06:51,680 It's always been someone else's turn, 163 00:06:51,700 --> 00:06:52,870 and now it's finally mine. 164 00:06:52,970 --> 00:06:54,790 It doesn't feel real. 165 00:06:54,890 --> 00:06:57,760 It's real, and you deserve it. 166 00:06:57,770 --> 00:06:59,870 Oh, thank you. 167 00:06:59,970 --> 00:07:01,480 Aww, get in on it. 168 00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:02,790 Love you guys. 169 00:07:02,890 --> 00:07:04,529 And you, Liza, 170 00:07:04,530 --> 00:07:06,389 you bought my first piece, you and David. 171 00:07:06,390 --> 00:07:07,866 Back when he had some money. 172 00:07:07,890 --> 00:07:09,269 God, he hated it. 173 00:07:09,270 --> 00:07:10,820 But it just made me love it more. 174 00:07:10,860 --> 00:07:12,240 Liza! 175 00:07:13,810 --> 00:07:15,186 Who is that woman screeching at you? 176 00:07:15,210 --> 00:07:16,870 Uh, that's Diana. 177 00:07:16,970 --> 00:07:18,066 Oh, that's Diana. 178 00:07:18,090 --> 00:07:19,600 Now I finally get it. 179 00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:21,570 Excuse me. 180 00:07:23,290 --> 00:07:24,790 Check these. 181 00:07:24,890 --> 00:07:26,316 Oh, so you are going to Shelter Island. 182 00:07:26,340 --> 00:07:28,499 No. Staten Island. 183 00:07:28,500 --> 00:07:30,230 Enzo has invited me to stay over. 184 00:07:30,330 --> 00:07:33,000 I haven't "stayed over" a man's place since... 185 00:07:33,980 --> 00:07:35,620 When did Baby Jessica fall down that well? 186 00:07:36,780 --> 00:07:38,439 Yikes! What did you pack? 187 00:07:38,440 --> 00:07:39,600 Just the essentials. 188 00:07:39,620 --> 00:07:41,140 Toothbrush, change of clothes, 189 00:07:41,240 --> 00:07:43,349 room spray, sheets. 190 00:07:43,350 --> 00:07:45,740 Well, are you staying over or redecorating? 191 00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:47,290 Liza, I don't know what to expect. 192 00:07:47,300 --> 00:07:49,120 I need to prepare for polyester, 193 00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:50,740 but it is worth the risk. 194 00:07:50,780 --> 00:07:51,919 The man may be a plumber, 195 00:07:51,920 --> 00:07:53,710 but he sure can... plumb my depths. 196 00:07:53,810 --> 00:07:55,590 - You know what I mean when I... - I understand. 197 00:07:55,600 --> 00:07:56,770 Shh. Here he comes. 198 00:07:56,780 --> 00:07:58,030 - Hey. - Hi. 199 00:07:59,600 --> 00:08:01,640 Oh, ain't she something? 200 00:08:01,700 --> 00:08:02,990 She sure is. 201 00:08:03,090 --> 00:08:04,420 The coat check is over there. 202 00:08:09,720 --> 00:08:11,230 And a certain... 203 00:08:11,330 --> 00:08:15,340 British director gave me this. 204 00:08:15,970 --> 00:08:18,360 That's not all he gave me. 205 00:08:19,530 --> 00:08:21,310 Gonorrhea. 206 00:08:21,410 --> 00:08:23,460 Saves you from asking. 207 00:08:23,480 --> 00:08:25,260 I, uh... I wasn't going to. 208 00:08:25,340 --> 00:08:27,270 Um, so the book is... 209 00:08:27,370 --> 00:08:28,386 Ooh, ooh, ooh! Check this out. 210 00:08:28,410 --> 00:08:29,940 Check this out. 211 00:08:30,100 --> 00:08:31,960 19th century 212 00:08:32,020 --> 00:08:33,920 Zulu warrior. 213 00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:36,670 Wow. 214 00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:38,480 I'm kidding. It's Joey Ramone. 215 00:08:39,820 --> 00:08:42,160 It's Joey Ramone. Ehh! Joey! 216 00:08:42,200 --> 00:08:43,390 - Right. Um... - Looking good! 217 00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:45,790 So the... so the book is, in fact, here? 218 00:08:45,890 --> 00:08:47,640 Have you ever seen 219 00:08:47,700 --> 00:08:49,760 a $10,000 dildo? 220 00:08:49,840 --> 00:08:51,120 Come on. 221 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:52,390 Hmm? 222 00:08:53,800 --> 00:08:55,230 What I really want to see 223 00:08:55,330 --> 00:08:58,270 is... the book. 224 00:08:58,740 --> 00:09:00,240 Now, Chrissie. 225 00:09:00,890 --> 00:09:03,070 It's from the pharaohs. 226 00:09:03,800 --> 00:09:05,750 You really hated the chapter, huh? 227 00:09:06,100 --> 00:09:08,030 Not at all. 228 00:09:08,180 --> 00:09:10,170 Listen, your voice on the podcast 229 00:09:10,180 --> 00:09:11,480 is... is charming 230 00:09:11,500 --> 00:09:13,470 and funny and... 231 00:09:13,570 --> 00:09:15,740 it makes me laugh about politics. 232 00:09:17,500 --> 00:09:20,190 Okay? I want readers to... 233 00:09:20,290 --> 00:09:22,310 get that same feeling that I got 234 00:09:22,320 --> 00:09:23,460 the first time I heard it. 235 00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:25,580 Can we take a recess? 236 00:09:25,640 --> 00:09:27,099 I find it very hard to focus 237 00:09:27,100 --> 00:09:28,550 with a bed five feet away. 238 00:09:29,020 --> 00:09:31,049 And that is why I suggested 239 00:09:31,050 --> 00:09:32,799 that we work in the business center. 240 00:09:32,800 --> 00:09:34,140 Okay. 241 00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:35,630 Before we go, I just... I have to ask. 242 00:09:35,640 --> 00:09:37,850 Is... besides the book, 243 00:09:37,860 --> 00:09:41,560 is there, you know, somebody else stopping us from... 244 00:09:42,160 --> 00:09:43,590 No. 245 00:09:43,690 --> 00:09:45,960 But this book is very important, Jake. 246 00:09:46,300 --> 00:09:47,900 And when it's all done, 247 00:09:47,930 --> 00:09:49,830 we can talk about you and me. 248 00:09:50,240 --> 00:09:52,030 Okay, good. 249 00:09:52,130 --> 00:09:54,470 Because ever since we met, I... 250 00:09:54,570 --> 00:09:57,480 have been very attracted to you, Kelsey. 251 00:09:58,570 --> 00:10:01,720 You're intelligent, and you are ambitious, 252 00:10:01,760 --> 00:10:04,120 - and you are gorgeous... - And we're packing, 253 00:10:04,170 --> 00:10:05,430 and we're moving. 254 00:10:26,980 --> 00:10:28,830 Maggie Amato. Diana Trout. 255 00:10:28,930 --> 00:10:31,040 I have heard so much about you. 256 00:10:31,060 --> 00:10:32,070 Likewise. 257 00:10:32,130 --> 00:10:33,990 That is a stunning necklace. 258 00:10:34,000 --> 00:10:36,169 You know, Liza never told me how chic you are. 259 00:10:36,170 --> 00:10:37,840 Oh, I'm sure I did. 260 00:10:38,460 --> 00:10:41,030 Well, Liza's generation has no concept of style. 261 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:42,430 It's all rompers and fanny packs. 262 00:10:42,530 --> 00:10:43,640 - Yeah. - Sorry to interrupt, 263 00:10:43,660 --> 00:10:44,870 but we just had to say hello. 264 00:10:44,970 --> 00:10:46,720 We are avid fans, Maggie. 265 00:10:46,780 --> 00:10:48,849 Penelope, Luca, that means the world to me. 266 00:10:48,850 --> 00:10:49,850 Thank you so much. 267 00:10:49,980 --> 00:10:51,280 We want a piece. 268 00:10:51,340 --> 00:10:52,700 Please... 269 00:10:52,800 --> 00:10:55,500 - call us. - I will. Thanks. 270 00:10:57,090 --> 00:10:58,459 Well, if you'll excuse me, I have to go 271 00:10:58,460 --> 00:10:59,919 soak up some more champagne 272 00:10:59,920 --> 00:11:01,610 and praise. 273 00:11:02,810 --> 00:11:04,430 Oh, Charles texted. 274 00:11:04,530 --> 00:11:06,459 "Still no book. Chrissie's stonewalling me. 275 00:11:06,460 --> 00:11:07,910 Have to stay the night." 276 00:11:08,010 --> 00:11:10,700 He is too important to be held hostage by that maniac. 277 00:11:11,250 --> 00:11:13,459 Well, my bag is packed. 278 00:11:13,460 --> 00:11:14,640 I do love that inn. 279 00:11:14,700 --> 00:11:16,440 Diana, stay at Enzo's. 280 00:11:17,040 --> 00:11:19,040 Like you said, he's worth the risk. 281 00:11:19,080 --> 00:11:20,260 And what about Charles? 282 00:11:20,880 --> 00:11:22,360 I'll go. 283 00:11:22,760 --> 00:11:25,400 Ah, I know why you want to go. 284 00:11:25,410 --> 00:11:26,750 You do? 285 00:11:26,900 --> 00:11:28,739 To hound Chrissie for an autograph. 286 00:11:28,740 --> 00:11:30,720 Well, don't, Liza. Be professional. 287 00:11:30,820 --> 00:11:32,319 Busted. 288 00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:33,360 You know me too well. 289 00:11:45,340 --> 00:11:47,160 This is my place. 290 00:11:47,260 --> 00:11:49,040 "Casa mia." 291 00:11:49,140 --> 00:11:52,220 It's been in the family for a couple of generations. 292 00:11:52,580 --> 00:11:55,000 It's so clean... spacious. 293 00:11:55,260 --> 00:11:57,080 That's island living, baby. 294 00:11:57,180 --> 00:11:59,040 You should see the master bedroom. 295 00:12:00,660 --> 00:12:02,480 I intend to. 296 00:12:15,900 --> 00:12:17,340 Hello? 297 00:12:21,580 --> 00:12:22,880 Wow. 298 00:12:22,980 --> 00:12:24,980 Hello? 299 00:12:26,180 --> 00:12:27,600 Liza? 300 00:12:27,700 --> 00:12:28,880 What are you doing here? 301 00:12:28,960 --> 00:12:30,670 Uh, Diana said you were having problems 302 00:12:30,700 --> 00:12:32,000 and asked me to come help. 303 00:12:32,100 --> 00:12:34,070 Plus, I'm a huge Chrissie Hart fangirl. 304 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:35,080 I know all of her songs. 305 00:12:35,140 --> 00:12:36,640 ♪ I'm howlin' at the moon ♪ 306 00:12:36,740 --> 00:12:38,240 ♪ I'm running back to you ♪ 307 00:12:38,280 --> 00:12:39,879 ♪ Crazy love ♪ 308 00:12:39,880 --> 00:12:42,500 ♪ Buh-buh, da-da-da-da, da-da... ♪ 309 00:12:42,620 --> 00:12:44,420 Did your babysitter teach you those lyrics? 310 00:12:44,480 --> 00:12:47,120 And... who the hell is this? 311 00:12:47,220 --> 00:12:48,820 Chrissie. 312 00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:51,320 This is Liza Miller, 313 00:12:51,420 --> 00:12:55,040 one of our finest editors. 314 00:12:55,100 --> 00:12:56,299 Uh-huh. 315 00:12:56,300 --> 00:12:57,800 I'll leave you to, uh... 316 00:12:57,980 --> 00:12:59,580 get acquainted. 317 00:13:00,820 --> 00:13:02,060 Wow. 318 00:13:02,070 --> 00:13:04,760 Um, Chrissie, I am such a huge fan. 319 00:13:04,780 --> 00:13:06,419 I hope you're not here to cock-block, 320 00:13:06,420 --> 00:13:09,240 'cause I plan to bang his brains out tonight. 321 00:13:11,980 --> 00:13:13,800 Great. 322 00:13:20,820 --> 00:13:22,939 Wait, Jake was Michelle Obama's lookout 323 00:13:22,940 --> 00:13:25,150 while she hurled at Beyoncé's birthday party? 324 00:13:25,160 --> 00:13:27,120 Yes! It's insane, right? 325 00:13:27,220 --> 00:13:29,079 Wait. 326 00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:30,316 I think we could switch these around, though. 327 00:13:30,340 --> 00:13:31,340 - Agreed. - Mm. 328 00:13:31,341 --> 00:13:32,920 Don't need this or this. 329 00:13:33,000 --> 00:13:35,320 Totally, but overall... 330 00:13:35,420 --> 00:13:37,240 so far, the chapter reads much better. 331 00:13:37,340 --> 00:13:38,840 So much better. 332 00:13:38,880 --> 00:13:40,920 How did you get him to open up so much? 333 00:13:41,020 --> 00:13:43,060 I'm a very skilled editor. 334 00:13:45,540 --> 00:13:47,080 Oh, my God. 335 00:13:47,180 --> 00:13:49,480 This guy took his grandma to the inauguration. 336 00:13:49,500 --> 00:13:51,720 He is such a wet blanket. 337 00:13:51,820 --> 00:13:53,360 No, he's not. 338 00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:54,600 He's nice. 339 00:13:54,700 --> 00:13:56,160 Exactly. "Nice." 340 00:13:56,260 --> 00:13:58,020 That is code for dull. 341 00:13:58,120 --> 00:14:00,160 Look, I see the way he looks at you. 342 00:14:00,260 --> 00:14:01,760 Poor guy. 343 00:14:01,860 --> 00:14:03,440 If only he knew. 344 00:14:05,020 --> 00:14:06,420 Knew what? 345 00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:09,080 That you're not into "nice." 346 00:14:10,380 --> 00:14:12,640 What am I into, Zane? 347 00:14:12,740 --> 00:14:15,220 Please, enlighten me, 348 00:14:15,420 --> 00:14:17,200 since you know me so well. 349 00:14:18,700 --> 00:14:20,719 You want someone 350 00:14:20,720 --> 00:14:22,880 who isn't intimidated by your intelligence... 351 00:14:22,980 --> 00:14:24,920 You're not wrong. 352 00:14:25,020 --> 00:14:27,279 Someone who challenges you, 353 00:14:27,280 --> 00:14:29,400 but also makes you happy... 354 00:14:29,500 --> 00:14:32,240 sometimes twice in one night. 355 00:14:34,340 --> 00:14:36,160 Mm. 356 00:14:36,500 --> 00:14:38,260 So someone like you. 357 00:14:39,940 --> 00:14:42,280 Stop toying with my emotions. 358 00:14:42,380 --> 00:14:44,400 You have those? 359 00:15:01,940 --> 00:15:05,520 ♪ I could go away ♪ 360 00:15:06,780 --> 00:15:08,680 This is a demo 361 00:15:08,740 --> 00:15:10,480 from "Penis Flytrap." 362 00:15:10,580 --> 00:15:11,676 What do you think? You like it? 363 00:15:11,700 --> 00:15:13,000 Love it! 364 00:15:13,100 --> 00:15:15,160 Yeah, well, I was asking Charles. 365 00:15:15,260 --> 00:15:17,280 Oh, I love it. Great. 366 00:15:17,380 --> 00:15:18,840 Strong. 367 00:15:18,940 --> 00:15:20,760 - Yeah? - Yeah, I love it. 368 00:15:20,860 --> 00:15:22,396 Don't leave me alone with her. 369 00:15:22,420 --> 00:15:23,959 Oh, now you want me here? 370 00:15:23,960 --> 00:15:26,039 What are you guys whispering about, huh? 371 00:15:26,040 --> 00:15:27,880 Oh, uh, we were just wondering 372 00:15:27,900 --> 00:15:29,356 when we're gonna get to see the book! 373 00:15:29,380 --> 00:15:30,700 You, um... 374 00:15:30,800 --> 00:15:32,719 you said lunchtime, which was wine, 375 00:15:32,720 --> 00:15:35,220 and then you said teatime, which was absinthe 376 00:15:35,320 --> 00:15:36,820 and your take on "Stranger Things." 377 00:15:36,860 --> 00:15:39,140 Yeah. Mirna! 378 00:15:39,240 --> 00:15:41,720 Bookie-bookie time! 379 00:15:42,560 --> 00:15:44,560 Ask, and you shall receive. 380 00:15:44,660 --> 00:15:46,340 Okay. 381 00:15:46,500 --> 00:15:48,300 Le book. 382 00:15:48,400 --> 00:15:50,940 Okay, not so fast. Let me just say something. 383 00:15:51,040 --> 00:15:54,340 When I was recording "Lady Pie," 384 00:15:54,440 --> 00:15:57,380 Ahmet Ertegun, he came here to get the master, 385 00:15:57,480 --> 00:15:59,660 and he did not leave for three weeks 386 00:15:59,740 --> 00:16:01,220 because I wasn't ready. 387 00:16:01,320 --> 00:16:02,700 I gotta be good and ready 388 00:16:02,720 --> 00:16:05,219 before you take my baby away from me, 389 00:16:05,220 --> 00:16:08,519 and right now, I'm just feeling kind of ready. 390 00:16:11,680 --> 00:16:12,940 Okay. 391 00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,020 I'm gonna create a diversion, 392 00:16:15,120 --> 00:16:16,860 and then you grab the book, 393 00:16:16,960 --> 00:16:18,480 and then we'll run. 394 00:16:18,580 --> 00:16:20,079 Are you crazy? 395 00:16:20,080 --> 00:16:23,700 We are too drunk to read it, let alone drive. 396 00:16:23,780 --> 00:16:25,619 All right. 397 00:16:25,620 --> 00:16:27,990 I saw on an episode of "Murder She Wrote" 398 00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:30,140 that if you eat a stick of butter 399 00:16:30,240 --> 00:16:32,900 before you start drinking, then you don't get drunk. 400 00:16:33,000 --> 00:16:35,600 How old are you? 401 00:16:39,960 --> 00:16:41,780 Get this out of my sight! 402 00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:44,519 - Get this away. - No, no, no, no. 403 00:16:44,520 --> 00:16:45,940 - Lock it up. - No... 404 00:16:46,040 --> 00:16:48,380 Could I check... I... 405 00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:49,780 Distracting. 406 00:16:49,860 --> 00:16:52,700 ♪ Where did you go and stay... ♪ 407 00:17:09,840 --> 00:17:12,380 It was, uh, nice to see you laugh. 408 00:17:12,480 --> 00:17:14,540 Huh. 409 00:17:14,640 --> 00:17:17,140 Well, hopefully, there'll be, uh, 410 00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:19,219 fewer antics tomorrow and we'll, uh, 411 00:17:19,220 --> 00:17:20,430 and we'll get the book. 412 00:17:20,440 --> 00:17:21,440 Good night. 413 00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:23,260 When are you gonna trust me again? 414 00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:28,960 I don't want to do this right now, Liza. 415 00:17:29,060 --> 00:17:31,299 Just talk to me. Please, Charles. 416 00:17:31,300 --> 00:17:33,980 Just... yell, if that will help. 417 00:17:34,020 --> 00:17:36,240 The silence... 418 00:17:36,340 --> 00:17:39,260 is just... I just don't know how much more I can take. 419 00:17:40,700 --> 00:17:42,440 If you're trying to punish me, 420 00:17:42,540 --> 00:17:44,520 it's working. 421 00:17:46,780 --> 00:17:48,640 Night, Liza. 422 00:17:51,860 --> 00:17:53,520 Good night. 423 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:44,760 Oh. Hello. Uh... 424 00:18:44,860 --> 00:18:46,880 Hey! Morning, sleepyhead. 425 00:18:46,980 --> 00:18:48,960 - Oh. - Did you meet my chef? 426 00:18:49,760 --> 00:18:51,060 Your chef? 427 00:18:51,820 --> 00:18:53,200 Enzo. 428 00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:55,479 You are full of surprises. 429 00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:58,860 Um, if I could have my eggs poached, please. 430 00:18:58,960 --> 00:19:01,680 _ 431 00:19:01,740 --> 00:19:03,600 What'd you say, Ma? 432 00:19:03,820 --> 00:19:05,240 Wait, "Ma"? 433 00:19:05,340 --> 00:19:07,640 - This is your mother? - Of course. 434 00:19:07,740 --> 00:19:10,200 And my chef. 435 00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:12,520 Charming. It's... um... 436 00:19:12,620 --> 00:19:15,720 And she... lives with you? 437 00:19:15,740 --> 00:19:17,280 No, I live with her. 438 00:19:17,380 --> 00:19:19,620 Ma, this is Diana, the one I was telling you about. 439 00:19:19,810 --> 00:19:21,920 _ 440 00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:24,560 _ 441 00:19:24,640 --> 00:19:26,320 _ 442 00:19:28,060 --> 00:19:30,160 _ 443 00:19:30,300 --> 00:19:34,820 _ 444 00:19:37,330 --> 00:19:38,840 _ 445 00:19:39,920 --> 00:19:42,540 _ 446 00:19:42,620 --> 00:19:44,520 You speak Italian! 447 00:19:45,140 --> 00:19:46,980 I lived in Florence for a year. 448 00:19:47,020 --> 00:19:48,080 I studied art history. 449 00:19:48,180 --> 00:19:50,040 I used to love walking up and down the Arno. 450 00:19:50,140 --> 00:19:51,860 I still remember the first phrase I learned. 451 00:19:52,800 --> 00:19:54,680 "No, I am not a prostitute." 452 00:19:54,780 --> 00:19:56,100 So... 453 00:19:57,640 --> 00:19:59,540 How old are you? 454 00:19:59,580 --> 00:20:03,300 _ 455 00:20:10,020 --> 00:20:11,680 Hey, Charles is gone. 456 00:20:11,760 --> 00:20:13,160 He is? 457 00:20:13,260 --> 00:20:15,360 Yeah, Mirna said he took off this morning. 458 00:20:15,460 --> 00:20:18,000 Oh, g... 459 00:20:18,060 --> 00:20:19,180 I had no idea. 460 00:20:19,280 --> 00:20:21,420 Ugh. Man. 461 00:20:22,540 --> 00:20:25,720 Ugh! 462 00:20:25,820 --> 00:20:29,060 - Men always run. - Hmm. 463 00:20:33,140 --> 00:20:36,320 Yes, dude! Walk of Fame! 464 00:20:36,470 --> 00:20:39,170 Ah! That Jake is a political animal, huh? 465 00:20:39,270 --> 00:20:41,370 Actually... 466 00:20:41,470 --> 00:20:44,290 I backslid last night... with Zane. 467 00:20:44,390 --> 00:20:45,650 Ah. 468 00:20:45,750 --> 00:20:47,349 Who then offered me coffee 469 00:20:47,350 --> 00:20:49,850 and was, like, nice? 470 00:20:49,950 --> 00:20:51,170 Coffee? 471 00:20:51,270 --> 00:20:52,929 The bar for heteros is so low. 472 00:20:52,930 --> 00:20:54,900 Oh, my God. I'm sleeping with both of them. 473 00:20:54,910 --> 00:20:56,250 - I'm literally the worst. - What? 474 00:20:56,350 --> 00:20:57,930 No, dude. For double dipping? 475 00:20:57,940 --> 00:20:59,930 Come on. Guys do it all the time. 476 00:21:00,030 --> 00:21:01,490 What? What do we do? 477 00:21:01,590 --> 00:21:03,900 - Kels is polyamorous. - Wow. 478 00:21:03,920 --> 00:21:06,090 - Really? - I'm not, okay? 479 00:21:06,190 --> 00:21:08,470 It's just two guys at one time... 480 00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:09,530 not at the same time. 481 00:21:09,630 --> 00:21:12,760 Josh... this is bad. 482 00:21:12,820 --> 00:21:14,580 Hey, don't ask me. 483 00:21:14,620 --> 00:21:17,690 I am a "one woman at a time" kind of guy. 484 00:21:17,790 --> 00:21:19,446 Right, right, right, because you definitely 485 00:21:19,470 --> 00:21:20,930 never lusted after Liza 486 00:21:20,950 --> 00:21:22,406 while you were with that little leprechaun. 487 00:21:22,430 --> 00:21:24,800 Wow. 488 00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:26,090 Has anyone seen Liza? 489 00:21:26,190 --> 00:21:28,089 She's on Shelter Island with Charles, 490 00:21:28,090 --> 00:21:29,870 trying to get a memoir out of Chrissy Hart. 491 00:21:29,910 --> 00:21:32,139 Chrissy Hart? Oh, my God. 492 00:21:32,140 --> 00:21:33,566 I framed her "Rolling Stone" cover... 493 00:21:33,590 --> 00:21:35,046 remember, with the snake tits... and I-I-I... 494 00:21:35,070 --> 00:21:36,810 I kissed it good night for an entire year. 495 00:21:36,910 --> 00:21:38,890 Wait, so Liza's with Charles right now? 496 00:21:38,990 --> 00:21:41,360 - For work. - Yeah. Sure. 497 00:21:43,590 --> 00:21:46,160 - Back to my problems. - What problem? No. 498 00:21:46,220 --> 00:21:47,690 The nice guy turned out to be sexy. 499 00:21:47,790 --> 00:21:49,110 The sexy guy turned out to be nice. 500 00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:50,730 - That's a win-win. - Exactly. 501 00:21:50,830 --> 00:21:52,360 - Who am I gonna choose? - Mm-mm. 502 00:21:52,380 --> 00:21:53,850 No. You don't. 503 00:21:53,950 --> 00:21:55,989 Have them both, diva. Come on. 504 00:21:55,990 --> 00:21:57,740 It's healthier for your flora too. 505 00:22:01,590 --> 00:22:03,710 I feel safe with you, Liza. 506 00:22:05,990 --> 00:22:08,100 - You got an old soul. - Ha! 507 00:22:08,180 --> 00:22:09,190 Not wrong. 508 00:22:09,230 --> 00:22:10,810 Uh, since we're so close, 509 00:22:10,910 --> 00:22:12,750 can I, uh... can I ask you 510 00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:14,730 why you won't let go of your book? 511 00:22:15,180 --> 00:22:18,330 Ugh. You know... 512 00:22:18,480 --> 00:22:20,430 I'm scared, man. 513 00:22:22,110 --> 00:22:25,210 I mean, what if people think it's shit? 514 00:22:25,410 --> 00:22:28,230 Or worse yet, what if people don't even care anyway? 515 00:22:28,330 --> 00:22:30,390 - I care. - Yeah... 516 00:22:30,490 --> 00:22:34,070 Your first album was the soundtrack to my senior year, 517 00:22:34,170 --> 00:22:37,150 even though I never mastered the heroin-chic look. 518 00:22:37,250 --> 00:22:39,129 Yeah, well, you're not really mastering 519 00:22:39,130 --> 00:22:40,350 whatever this is anyway. 520 00:22:40,450 --> 00:22:42,430 What I'm trying to say is, 521 00:22:42,530 --> 00:22:44,990 your music is meaningful. 522 00:22:45,090 --> 00:22:46,840 When I was separating from my husband, 523 00:22:46,850 --> 00:22:49,390 I was... I was scared, too, 524 00:22:49,490 --> 00:22:51,860 of being alone, of being old, 525 00:22:52,020 --> 00:22:54,070 but then I played that album, 526 00:22:54,170 --> 00:22:55,939 and those songs 527 00:22:55,940 --> 00:22:57,760 helped me let go of that fear, 528 00:22:57,890 --> 00:23:00,839 and I felt strong and 529 00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:03,240 resilient and myself again. 530 00:23:03,300 --> 00:23:04,689 And this memoir, 531 00:23:04,690 --> 00:23:06,570 your wild tales and adventures, 532 00:23:06,580 --> 00:23:10,919 could do the same for more people than just your fans. 533 00:23:12,280 --> 00:23:15,350 Don't run from this opportunity, Chrissie. 534 00:23:15,450 --> 00:23:17,520 Then you're no better 535 00:23:17,540 --> 00:23:20,070 than those undeserving men who ran out on you. 536 00:23:26,460 --> 00:23:28,580 You want me to sign your boobs? 537 00:23:28,720 --> 00:23:29,740 Please. 538 00:23:29,860 --> 00:23:31,350 Yeah. 539 00:23:31,450 --> 00:23:32,830 Pen. 540 00:23:41,260 --> 00:23:43,200 _ 541 00:23:44,620 --> 00:23:45,980 Wait, wait, wait. 542 00:23:47,410 --> 00:23:48,950 How did you get this? 543 00:23:49,050 --> 00:23:50,220 I didn't run away. 544 00:23:56,060 --> 00:23:59,820 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.MY-SUBS.com -- 35992

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