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[ Laughter ]
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[ Grunts ]
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♪♪
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[ Roars ]
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-[ Screams ]
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♪♪
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-Whoa!
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-Whoa!
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♪♪
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[ Laughs ]
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♪♪
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Good morrow,
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my loyal subjects!
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What news have you brought
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to your king?
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-Sound off, Jaguar Warriors!
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-Oh! Oh!
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Our mom let us watch
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a PG-13 movie.
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Uh-huh. And we only covered
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our eyes once!
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Very good, very good.
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Now, Eagle Warriors!
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Let me hear your battle mottos.
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Like the crested caracara,
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I am beautiful and majestic,
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but if crossed, I will not
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hesitate to claw
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the eyes from my enemies!
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And I have sharpened
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my toe nails into talons.
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Actually, they were
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already like that.
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Weird, but acceptable! Now!
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For my first decree
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as King, I will --
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Get Victor some ice cream.
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'Cause you're dressed
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like that crazy guy
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that sells ice cream
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in the parking lot.
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We are not here to sell
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frozen confections, Victor.
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It's called "LARPing."
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I'm the Aztec king, Valtezuma.
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And this is my kingdom.
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Wait, King? Kingdom?
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-I want that.
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-Ah, ha, ha.
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There can only be one king.
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Fine, I'll be the Queen, then.
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You can't be any!
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The LARPing handbook says
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there can only be one.
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Besides, you lack what us
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Kings call the three S's.
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Stoic, stern, serious.
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You're too immature to be king.
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But if you really want to LARP
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with us, you can be,
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mm, the Payaso Knight.
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-A knight, huh?
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What's my weapon? Oh!
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What about a laser gun that also
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shoots swords and spears?
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And bees?
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Come on, Val! Bees.
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Uh...no. You get this.
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Payaso's weapon is to make other
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knights laugh to boost morale.
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-You know, kind of like a --
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-Jester!
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-Oh, or a fool!
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-Yeah.
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Tell us a joke, fool!
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[ Laughter ]
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I have never laughed before.
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Make my first time special.
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Ahh!
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I ain't nobody's fool!
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Have fun flarping,
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you flarpy flarps!
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Suit yourself, Vic.
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Suit yourself.
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Ugh.
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Who does Val think he is?
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Three S's?
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More like stinky, snooty,
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and stinkier!
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I can totally be more of
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an awesome king than him.
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Huh?
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Cool. It's like a crown thing.
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♪♪
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Hey, it fits!
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♪♪
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What's happening?
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[ Teeth chattering ]
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-Ah.
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-Yeah.
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Ee.
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[ Groans ]
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[ Roars ]
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Uh, ah.
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I always knew those creepy
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statues were watching me!
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I didn't touch anything,
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I swear!
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Don't tell Grandma!
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[ Groaning, sighs ]
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Why'd they stop?
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Wha...ah, ah.
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So when I wear this crown,
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it brings you guys to life?
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Hey, that means I'm your king!
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[ Speaking gibberish ]
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Nice!
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♪ Val's gonna be jealous ♪
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♪ Val's gonna be jealous ♪
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Okay, I'm the king, so you gotta
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do what I say, right?
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[ Groans ]
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Then go get me a cape,
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a scepter, and a concha!
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[ Grunting ]
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[ Laughing ]
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Woman: Is somewhere there?
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♪♪
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Mmm!
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Knights of Calavera!
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It's time to claim our kingdom!
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Attention Flarpers!
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Your new king is here.
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Please worship me
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and bring me free stuff.
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Your new king is better
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than that other king.
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♪♪
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Ahh, that's nice.
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Hector, grapes, please.
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[ Slurps ]
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[ Spits ] Seeds!
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Just as I asked.
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Now I can spit them
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in the faces of my enemies.
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Vic! What's going on here?
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Are those Grandma's
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creepy statues?
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I'm the king.
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And these creepy statues
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are my creepy kingdom.
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Say hello to Flat Top.
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Big Mama and Sweetie Poo.
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Stinky, Pinky, and Sheldon.
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The Head!
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And finally,
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my main man Hector.
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He's so humble.
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And now, the moment
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you've all been waiting for!
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A serious display
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of my kingliness!
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[ Trumpet plays ]
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[ Growling ]
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-Huh?
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-Ladies and germs!
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May I present to you
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the 21 Glute Salute!
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[ Farting ]
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That was only eight.
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[ Laughter ]
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That lingers, man,
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that lingers!
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Victor!
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This is a complete mockery!
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The LARPing handbook
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eloquently states --
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[ Spits ]
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[ Laughs ]
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It states
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that there can only be one --
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[ Spits ]
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There can only be one king,
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and if someone el--
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[ Spits ]
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Knock it off!
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Fine, okay, okay.
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-[ Spits ]
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-Oh! [ Laughs ]
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Good one, Hector.
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That is it!
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I must royally decree
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that you hand over your crown!
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What if I don't give you
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my crown
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and royally degree
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that you go eat some dirt?
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If you don't abdicate
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the throne,
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then you are in open rebellion
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of my kingdom
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and we must wage battle!
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Then I guess you give me
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no choice.
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[ Grunts ]
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[ Indistinct sounds ]
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Huh?
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-[ Grunts ]
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-Aah!
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Feel the fury
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of the Eagle Warrior!
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Huh?
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Aah!
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Ah.
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Whoa.
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-Aah, germs!
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-Can I have some germs?
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My warriors!
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This isn't fun anymore, Val!
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You're a bad king!
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Bad king?
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Vic, you're gonna stop
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all this right now!
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I don't take orders
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from lowly pheasants.
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Now bend the knee!
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First of all, it's peasants!
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-And never!
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-Very well.
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Warriors, send this traitor
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to the stocks.
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Hey!
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Vic, you're making
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a mockery of the crown!
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Just because you don't
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like my style
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doesn't mean I'm not
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super good at being king.
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Big Mama, pie the fool.
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Aah. That's it! I'm done!
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Hey, why wasn't that locked?
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-Mm.
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-You don't deserve this.
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What? My crown!
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You jerk! Give that back!
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I'm the king,
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and I order you to --
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Being king is serious,
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Victor!
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Gimme!
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-[ Grunting ]
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-[ Grunting ]
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Great job, dingus.
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Now no one is king.
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You were never a king
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to begin with.
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If you would've just let me be
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the queen,
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this woulda never happened!
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-[ Speaking indistinctly ]
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Listen to me, Victor.
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You're not listening!
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Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
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Huh? What?
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Hey, your king demands
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you to come back here!
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Oh, you again.
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[ Grunting ]
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-Whoa!
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-[ Grunts ]
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That's not funny.
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Personally,
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I found the experience
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poignant and moving.
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Nobody asked you, Guillermo.
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I've had enough of this.
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Where's that stinking crown?
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-Here's half of it.
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-What?
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All: Yoo-hoo!
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Huh? Gimme that!
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These dummies need to remember
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who's in charge around here.
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Loyal servants!
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I order you to bend the knee!
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[ Laughter ]
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Why aren't they listening to me?
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-Is it 'cause my crown broke?
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-Maybe that.
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And maybe it's because
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you lack a certain,
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uh, three characteristics
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of a ruler?
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All three of which start with
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a specific sounding syllable?
296
00:08:09,292 --> 00:08:11,712
Ay de mi! Aluxes!
297
00:08:11,792 --> 00:08:13,542
Out, out! Get out!
298
00:08:13,625 --> 00:08:14,915
You little pests!
299
00:08:15,000 --> 00:08:16,540
And good riddance! Huh?
300
00:08:16,625 --> 00:08:19,205
I know you two
301
00:08:16,625 --> 00:08:19,205
had something to do --
302
00:08:19,292 --> 00:08:24,082
Ay! I need a vacation.
303
00:08:24,167 --> 00:08:26,997
[ Groans ]
304
00:08:27,083 --> 00:08:28,293
[ Grunts ]
305
00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:31,325
Hector! Play time is over!
306
00:08:28,375 --> 00:08:31,325
Your king is here.
307
00:08:31,417 --> 00:08:33,707
Now surrender the crown and I
308
00:08:31,417 --> 00:08:33,707
won't put you in the stocks!
309
00:08:33,792 --> 00:08:37,172
I know
310
00:08:33,792 --> 00:08:37,172
you're in here somewhere.
311
00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:40,630
My crown.
312
00:08:40,708 --> 00:08:42,328
♪♪
313
00:08:42,417 --> 00:08:44,167
-Whew.
314
00:08:42,417 --> 00:08:44,167
-Hey, Flat Top!
315
00:08:44,250 --> 00:08:46,790
Get back here,
316
00:08:44,250 --> 00:08:46,790
you little traitor!
317
00:08:46,875 --> 00:08:48,825
Ha! Got you!
318
00:08:48,917 --> 00:08:51,127
Huh? Uh-oh.
319
00:08:51,208 --> 00:08:53,748
-[ Panting ]
320
00:08:51,208 --> 00:08:53,748
-Hector!
321
00:08:53,833 --> 00:08:57,043
Hector, don't you grind up
322
00:08:53,833 --> 00:08:57,043
that crown, mister.
323
00:08:57,125 --> 00:08:59,955
King Victor al rescate!
324
00:09:00,042 --> 00:09:04,002
[ Panting ]
325
00:09:04,083 --> 00:09:06,383
Ya, ah!
326
00:09:06,458 --> 00:09:08,418
[ Laughs, farts ]
327
00:09:08,500 --> 00:09:11,000
Hector!
328
00:09:11,083 --> 00:09:14,003
Your betrayal hurts
329
00:09:11,083 --> 00:09:14,003
more than you could know.
330
00:09:14,083 --> 00:09:16,673
If you had any loyalty
331
00:09:14,083 --> 00:09:16,673
left within you,
332
00:09:16,750 --> 00:09:20,710
give me the crown
333
00:09:16,750 --> 00:09:20,710
and all will be forgiven.
334
00:09:20,792 --> 00:09:23,382
[ Grunts ]
335
00:09:23,458 --> 00:09:26,498
[ Gasps ] Well, you're not gonna
336
00:09:23,458 --> 00:09:26,498
blow me off that easy.
337
00:09:26,583 --> 00:09:29,213
Aah!
338
00:09:29,292 --> 00:09:31,922
Whoa! Hey, nice catch, Val.
339
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:34,170
Victor, again,
340
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:34,170
you are not king.
341
00:09:34,250 --> 00:09:35,670
All this mess would have
342
00:09:34,250 --> 00:09:35,670
never happened
343
00:09:35,750 --> 00:09:38,000
if had just stuck
344
00:09:35,750 --> 00:09:38,000
to being the clown.
345
00:09:38,083 --> 00:09:39,963
No, Valentino, I'm the --
346
00:09:40,042 --> 00:09:41,962
Wait, the clown!
347
00:09:42,042 --> 00:09:44,882
Hector! You win.
348
00:09:44,958 --> 00:09:47,498
You've bested me in battle.
349
00:09:47,583 --> 00:09:51,423
And for that, I present to you
350
00:09:47,583 --> 00:09:51,423
the honorary, major,
351
00:09:51,500 --> 00:09:53,830
prestigious
352
00:09:51,500 --> 00:09:53,830
Purple Glute Salute!
353
00:09:53,917 --> 00:09:55,377
[ Farts ]
354
00:09:55,458 --> 00:09:57,708
Huh?
355
00:09:57,792 --> 00:10:01,712
[ Laughter ]
356
00:10:01,792 --> 00:10:04,252
Huh?
357
00:10:04,333 --> 00:10:07,503
Looks like the joke's on you.
358
00:10:07,583 --> 00:10:09,213
Yeah!
359
00:10:09,292 --> 00:10:11,882
All right! Pump it!
360
00:10:09,292 --> 00:10:11,882
And shake it!
361
00:10:11,958 --> 00:10:13,458
Get those glutes tight!
362
00:10:13,542 --> 00:10:15,082
Are you done yet?
363
00:10:15,167 --> 00:10:17,877
Heh, sorry, Val.
364
00:10:15,167 --> 00:10:17,877
I'm just gonna miss these guys.
365
00:10:17,958 --> 00:10:21,378
All right, loyal servants!
366
00:10:17,958 --> 00:10:21,378
Everyone to their positions.
367
00:10:21,458 --> 00:10:23,668
[ Mumbling indistinctly ]
368
00:10:26,458 --> 00:10:30,128
[ Grunting ]
369
00:10:30,208 --> 00:10:31,998
[ Farts, laughs ]
370
00:10:32,083 --> 00:10:35,333
Oh, Hector.
371
00:10:32,083 --> 00:10:35,333
An alux after my own heart.
372
00:10:35,417 --> 00:10:36,877
-[ Grunts ]
373
00:10:35,417 --> 00:10:36,877
-Huh?
374
00:10:36,958 --> 00:10:39,828
Here, let me help you.
375
00:10:36,958 --> 00:10:39,828
There you go, little fella.
376
00:10:39,917 --> 00:10:42,127
It's been an honor serving
377
00:10:39,917 --> 00:10:42,127
with you all.
378
00:10:42,208 --> 00:10:44,628
I'm gonna remember each
379
00:10:42,208 --> 00:10:44,628
and every one of you.
380
00:10:44,708 --> 00:10:46,668
You know, Vic?
381
00:10:44,708 --> 00:10:46,668
You really impressed me today.
382
00:10:46,750 --> 00:10:48,880
I think you have the king's
383
00:10:46,750 --> 00:10:48,880
three S's after all --
384
00:10:48,958 --> 00:10:50,958
smart, sweet, and silly.
385
00:10:51,042 --> 00:10:52,792
I'm sorry I acted like a jerk.
386
00:10:52,875 --> 00:10:54,665
Thanks, Val.
387
00:10:52,875 --> 00:10:54,665
That means a lot.
388
00:10:54,750 --> 00:10:56,130
And while being king was fun,
389
00:10:56,208 --> 00:10:59,578
I think I'm just gonna stick
390
00:10:56,208 --> 00:10:59,578
to being a payaso for now.
391
00:10:59,667 --> 00:11:01,747
♪♪
392
00:11:02,792 --> 00:11:12,672
♪♪
393
00:11:12,750 --> 00:11:16,380
♪♪
22695
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