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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,567 --> 00:00:03,197 >> Hey, guys. 2 00:00:03,200 --> 00:00:04,270 I'm Ed Bassmaster and you may 3 00:00:04,267 --> 00:00:05,367 have seen me on YouTube. 4 00:00:05,367 --> 00:00:06,727 The Looney Wheels. 5 00:00:06,733 --> 00:00:07,833 And that is me. 6 00:00:07,833 --> 00:00:08,833 >> What are you talking about? 7 00:00:08,833 --> 00:00:09,903 >> I'm a bush! 8 00:00:09,900 --> 00:00:10,930 That's me too. 9 00:00:10,933 --> 00:00:11,833 The crawfish here is amazing. 10 00:00:11,833 --> 00:00:12,703 >> Yeah. 11 00:00:12,700 --> 00:00:13,430 >> I just ordered it. 12 00:00:13,433 --> 00:00:14,333 When I see a car like this, 13 00:00:14,333 --> 00:00:15,403 the first thing I do is I say, 14 00:00:15,400 --> 00:00:16,630 "Would you look at this?" 15 00:00:16,633 --> 00:00:18,133 Yeah, all of those guys are me. 16 00:00:18,133 --> 00:00:19,333 >> Ed Bassmaster! 17 00:00:19,333 --> 00:00:20,233 >> You're my favorite! 18 00:00:20,233 --> 00:00:21,433 >> I have almost a billion views 19 00:00:21,433 --> 00:00:22,303 on the Internet 20 00:00:22,300 --> 00:00:23,300 and now I'm gonna take 21 00:00:23,300 --> 00:00:24,870 what I do to television. 22 00:00:24,867 --> 00:00:26,627 >> No way! 23 00:00:26,633 --> 00:00:27,573 >> This is 24 00:00:27,567 --> 00:00:31,167 "The Ed Bassmaster Show." 25 00:00:31,167 --> 00:00:37,997 * 26 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:38,770 Merry Christmas! 27 00:00:38,767 --> 00:00:39,997 (women screaming) 28 00:00:40,000 --> 00:00:40,830 Welcome! 29 00:00:40,867 --> 00:00:42,497 * 30 00:00:44,467 --> 00:00:45,627 Merry Christmas! 31 00:00:45,633 --> 00:00:47,203 Come on in. 32 00:00:47,200 --> 00:00:48,570 More like scary Christmas. 33 00:00:48,567 --> 00:00:50,667 I got you! 34 00:00:50,667 --> 00:00:51,727 Merry Christmas, pal! 35 00:00:51,733 --> 00:00:53,173 How are ya? 36 00:00:53,167 --> 00:00:54,497 How you doing? 37 00:00:54,500 --> 00:00:56,330 Welcome. 38 00:00:56,333 --> 00:00:57,473 >> Isn't that cool? 39 00:00:57,467 --> 00:00:58,197 >> This one? 40 00:00:58,200 --> 00:00:59,300 >> Merry Christmas! 41 00:00:59,300 --> 00:01:00,730 How are ya? 42 00:01:00,733 --> 00:01:02,273 (women laughing) 43 00:01:02,267 --> 00:01:03,297 >> That's so mean. 44 00:01:03,300 --> 00:01:04,330 (bleep) 45 00:01:04,333 --> 00:01:05,133 >> That was hilarious! 46 00:01:05,133 --> 00:01:06,303 Good job. 47 00:01:06,300 --> 00:01:07,270 Today I'm gonna be playing 48 00:01:07,267 --> 00:01:10,727 Mumbles in a convenience store. 49 00:01:10,733 --> 00:01:11,433 Bartle-do. 50 00:01:11,433 --> 00:01:14,673 * 51 00:01:14,667 --> 00:01:15,627 How you doing, pal? 52 00:01:15,633 --> 00:01:16,473 >> I'm doing all right. 53 00:01:16,467 --> 00:01:17,427 >> All right, Soldier. 54 00:01:17,433 --> 00:01:18,203 Hey... 55 00:01:18,200 --> 00:01:19,830 (mumbles incoherently) 56 00:01:19,833 --> 00:01:20,933 >> It's all good. 57 00:01:20,933 --> 00:01:22,133 >> I know it is! 58 00:01:22,133 --> 00:01:23,533 (mumbles incoherently) 59 00:01:23,533 --> 00:01:24,403 >> What's that? 60 00:01:24,433 --> 00:01:27,073 * 61 00:01:27,067 --> 00:01:28,467 (mumbles incoherently) 62 00:01:28,467 --> 00:01:29,327 >> What's that mean? 63 00:01:29,333 --> 00:01:31,073 (mumbles incoherently) 64 00:01:31,067 --> 00:01:32,197 >> I... I don't got you. 65 00:01:32,200 --> 00:01:33,200 Say that again? 66 00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:33,900 (mumbles incoherently) 67 00:01:33,900 --> 00:01:34,730 >> Small? 68 00:01:34,733 --> 00:01:35,833 (mumbles incoherently) 69 00:01:35,833 --> 00:01:37,133 >> Still don't have it. 70 00:01:37,133 --> 00:01:37,973 (mumbles incoherently) 71 00:01:37,967 --> 00:01:38,627 (mumbles incoherently) 72 00:01:38,633 --> 00:01:39,403 >> What's that? 73 00:01:39,400 --> 00:01:40,070 >> Hey, partner, 74 00:01:40,067 --> 00:01:40,727 how ya doing? 75 00:01:40,733 --> 00:01:41,533 >> Carton of 76 00:01:41,533 --> 00:01:42,233 Winston Light 100s. 77 00:01:42,233 --> 00:01:43,703 >> We got caught in a windstorm? 78 00:01:43,700 --> 00:01:44,530 >> Winston. 79 00:01:44,533 --> 00:01:45,733 Back there. 80 00:01:45,733 --> 00:01:46,433 >> Oh, I thought you got 81 00:01:46,433 --> 00:01:47,733 caught in a windstorm. 82 00:01:47,733 --> 00:01:48,703 >> No. 83 00:01:48,700 --> 00:01:49,370 >> Oh, my bad. 84 00:01:49,367 --> 00:01:50,267 Didn't it sound like he said 85 00:01:50,267 --> 00:01:51,667 he got caught in a windstorm? 86 00:01:51,667 --> 00:01:52,967 You heard him? 87 00:01:52,967 --> 00:01:54,097 (mumbles incoherently) 88 00:01:54,100 --> 00:01:55,070 >> I got nothing. 89 00:01:55,067 --> 00:01:55,827 >> Okay, I got nothing, 90 00:01:55,833 --> 00:01:56,833 my brother. 91 00:01:56,833 --> 00:01:57,873 >> All right, that's what 92 00:01:57,867 --> 00:01:59,067 I'm talking about. 93 00:01:59,067 --> 00:01:59,867 >> Welcome to 94 00:01:59,867 --> 00:02:01,667 Single & Ready 2 Mingle, 95 00:02:01,667 --> 00:02:03,127 a video dating service. 96 00:02:03,167 --> 00:02:05,297 Meet our newest bachelor Skippy. 97 00:02:06,400 --> 00:02:08,070 >> This is just like a profile 98 00:02:08,067 --> 00:02:10,427 for anybody that's looking for 99 00:02:10,433 --> 00:02:13,073 somebody that's like... 100 00:02:13,067 --> 00:02:15,927 handsome, talented. 101 00:02:15,933 --> 00:02:17,273 I like to draw. 102 00:02:17,267 --> 00:02:17,927 I like to play 103 00:02:17,933 --> 00:02:19,373 a little bit of guitar. 104 00:02:19,367 --> 00:02:21,767 I like to go windsailing. 105 00:02:21,767 --> 00:02:24,067 I like riding motorcycles. 106 00:02:24,067 --> 00:02:25,767 They're really fun. 107 00:02:25,767 --> 00:02:27,567 I can go really fast on them. 108 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:29,700 * 109 00:02:30,867 --> 00:02:31,527 (static blaring) 110 00:02:31,533 --> 00:02:32,573 >> Brett Sellars here reporting 111 00:02:32,567 --> 00:02:39,667 live for... some news station. 112 00:02:39,667 --> 00:02:41,067 Brett Sellars here on the scene. 113 00:02:41,067 --> 00:02:42,397 We've just had a sandwich thief 114 00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:43,830 strike again in the park. 115 00:02:43,833 --> 00:02:44,803 We're gonna try to cover 116 00:02:44,800 --> 00:02:45,730 the story, get some 117 00:02:45,733 --> 00:02:46,673 eye-witness accounts here. 118 00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:47,597 Come on, let's go. 119 00:02:47,633 --> 00:02:48,473 Guys, did you witness 120 00:02:48,467 --> 00:02:49,367 the attack? 121 00:02:49,367 --> 00:02:50,067 >> Uh, no. 122 00:02:50,067 --> 00:02:50,697 >> So you guys didn't 123 00:02:50,700 --> 00:02:51,470 witness the attack? 124 00:02:51,467 --> 00:02:52,327 Okay, can you do me a favor? 125 00:02:52,333 --> 00:02:53,733 Cut, cut, cut, cut. 126 00:02:53,767 --> 00:02:55,067 I got to come back with a story. 127 00:02:55,067 --> 00:02:55,667 My ass is on the line 128 00:02:55,667 --> 00:02:56,327 if I don't. 129 00:02:56,333 --> 00:02:57,203 Can you just go along with it 130 00:02:57,200 --> 00:02:57,970 and we'll kind of fabricate 131 00:02:57,967 --> 00:02:58,627 some stories? 132 00:02:58,633 --> 00:02:59,333 >> Yeah, absolutely. 133 00:02:59,333 --> 00:03:00,073 >> Here we go. 134 00:03:00,100 --> 00:03:01,070 Folks, back on the scene. 135 00:03:01,067 --> 00:03:02,167 Brett Sellars here with... 136 00:03:02,167 --> 00:03:02,927 >> Vincent. 137 00:03:02,933 --> 00:03:03,903 >> Patrick. 138 00:03:03,900 --> 00:03:05,300 >> Who were present when 139 00:03:05,300 --> 00:03:06,530 the second attack occurred. 140 00:03:06,533 --> 00:03:07,773 Guys, tell me what happened. 141 00:03:07,767 --> 00:03:08,927 >> Uh, the guy knocked me on 142 00:03:08,933 --> 00:03:09,973 the back of my head 143 00:03:09,967 --> 00:03:11,167 and I went unconscious 144 00:03:11,167 --> 00:03:12,197 for about two minutes. 145 00:03:12,200 --> 00:03:12,930 Yeah, I woke up-- 146 00:03:12,933 --> 00:03:13,673 >> Yeah, I was trying to wake 147 00:03:13,667 --> 00:03:14,427 him up, he wouldn't wake up. 148 00:03:14,433 --> 00:03:16,173 >> Uh, by the way, the thief 149 00:03:16,200 --> 00:03:17,470 that we're encountering is, 150 00:03:17,467 --> 00:03:18,497 uh, stealing people's lunches, 151 00:03:18,500 --> 00:03:19,400 believe it or not, 152 00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:20,200 so maybe you had 153 00:03:20,200 --> 00:03:21,300 a sandwich, maybe... 154 00:03:21,300 --> 00:03:22,670 What's your favorite menu item 155 00:03:22,667 --> 00:03:23,827 that you'd picnic with? 156 00:03:23,833 --> 00:03:24,603 >> We had burritos. 157 00:03:24,600 --> 00:03:25,330 >> Burritos. 158 00:03:25,333 --> 00:03:26,233 And action. 159 00:03:26,267 --> 00:03:27,397 So he took your burritos. 160 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:29,070 Tell us what happened next. 161 00:03:29,067 --> 00:03:30,097 >> Well, I was just really 162 00:03:30,100 --> 00:03:31,400 hungry, you know? 163 00:03:31,400 --> 00:03:32,730 And I had that burrito, 164 00:03:32,733 --> 00:03:33,673 it was big and heavy 165 00:03:33,667 --> 00:03:34,727 and I was just so excited 166 00:03:34,733 --> 00:03:36,073 to put it in my stomach. 167 00:03:36,067 --> 00:03:37,527 But he took it from me, man. 168 00:03:37,533 --> 00:03:38,573 It's not cool. 169 00:03:38,567 --> 00:03:39,297 >> I'm sorry, pal. 170 00:03:39,300 --> 00:03:39,970 >> Something has to be 171 00:03:39,967 --> 00:03:40,667 done about it. 172 00:03:40,667 --> 00:03:41,467 >> That's why we're here. 173 00:03:41,467 --> 00:03:42,497 We're gonna get to the bottom 174 00:03:42,500 --> 00:03:43,330 of this, we're gonna find out. 175 00:03:43,333 --> 00:03:44,103 Thank you for your 176 00:03:44,100 --> 00:03:45,400 eye-witness account, guys. 177 00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:46,970 Brett Sellars on the scene here. 178 00:03:51,300 --> 00:03:52,270 Hey, looking for a great deal 179 00:03:52,267 --> 00:03:53,197 on a used car? 180 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:54,570 Come see Merle and Earl 181 00:03:54,567 --> 00:03:56,227 at Miller Brothers used car lot. 182 00:03:56,233 --> 00:03:57,773 We're twice the salesmen. 183 00:03:57,767 --> 00:03:59,367 So you get twice the savings. 184 00:03:59,367 --> 00:04:00,427 And that means you save 185 00:04:00,467 --> 00:04:01,497 twice the money. 186 00:04:01,500 --> 00:04:02,830 We got big cars. 187 00:04:02,833 --> 00:04:04,073 And we got little cars. 188 00:04:04,067 --> 00:04:04,727 So come on down to 189 00:04:04,733 --> 00:04:06,073 Miller Brothers used car lot 190 00:04:06,067 --> 00:04:07,067 and let Merle and Earl 191 00:04:07,067 --> 00:04:09,727 double your savings. 192 00:04:09,733 --> 00:04:11,073 All right, so today I'm playing 193 00:04:11,067 --> 00:04:12,867 Earl Miller, car salesman. 194 00:04:12,867 --> 00:04:13,697 I'm also playing his 195 00:04:13,700 --> 00:04:19,230 twin brother Merle Miller. 196 00:04:19,233 --> 00:04:19,973 Hey, what's up, man? 197 00:04:19,967 --> 00:04:20,627 >> Ricardo. 198 00:04:20,633 --> 00:04:21,573 >> Ricardo, Earl. 199 00:04:21,567 --> 00:04:22,597 >> Hey, how's it going? 200 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:23,330 >> And it's me and my brother 201 00:04:23,333 --> 00:04:24,833 Merle, uh... 202 00:04:24,833 --> 00:04:26,233 twin brother by-- 203 00:04:26,233 --> 00:04:27,673 Older brother by seven minutes. 204 00:04:27,667 --> 00:04:30,397 You're looking for... 205 00:04:30,433 --> 00:04:31,503 For your fiancée, all right. 206 00:04:32,833 --> 00:04:33,533 What kind of car do you 207 00:04:33,533 --> 00:04:39,403 see her driving, like-- 208 00:04:39,433 --> 00:04:40,273 Right, right. 209 00:04:40,300 --> 00:04:41,300 We-- I mean, I can definitely 210 00:04:41,300 --> 00:04:42,070 put you in something 211 00:04:42,067 --> 00:04:43,067 reliable, um-- 212 00:04:43,067 --> 00:04:43,667 (phone ringing) 213 00:04:43,667 --> 00:04:44,467 >> Earl to the repair shop, 214 00:04:44,467 --> 00:04:45,427 Earl to repair. 215 00:04:45,433 --> 00:04:46,233 >> All right, give me 216 00:04:46,233 --> 00:04:46,903 a couple of minutes. 217 00:04:46,900 --> 00:04:52,430 I'll be right with you, Ricardo. 218 00:04:52,433 --> 00:04:57,503 >> * Uh 219 00:04:57,500 --> 00:05:01,400 * Uh 220 00:05:01,400 --> 00:05:03,200 * Uh * 221 00:05:03,200 --> 00:05:07,830 (tires squealing) 222 00:05:07,833 --> 00:05:09,073 >> Oh, hey, what's up, partner? 223 00:05:09,067 --> 00:05:10,067 >> Hey, how you doin', man? 224 00:05:10,067 --> 00:05:11,327 >> How'd you get in? 225 00:05:11,333 --> 00:05:12,903 >> Uh, your brother. 226 00:05:12,900 --> 00:05:13,730 >> My brother's here? 227 00:05:13,733 --> 00:05:14,533 >> Yeah. 228 00:05:14,533 --> 00:05:15,573 >> Okay. 229 00:05:15,567 --> 00:05:16,767 Hi, I'm Merle Miller. 230 00:05:16,767 --> 00:05:17,597 >> Ricardo. 231 00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:18,430 >> Nice to meet you, Ricardo. 232 00:05:18,433 --> 00:05:20,073 Is he, uh, showing you a car? 233 00:05:20,067 --> 00:05:20,767 >> Uh, we haven't 234 00:05:20,767 --> 00:05:21,567 started looking yet. 235 00:05:21,567 --> 00:05:22,227 We're just kind of 236 00:05:22,233 --> 00:05:23,273 talking right now. 237 00:05:23,267 --> 00:05:23,967 >> Huh. 238 00:05:23,967 --> 00:05:24,627 That's odd. 239 00:05:24,633 --> 00:05:25,373 He ain't even supposed to 240 00:05:25,367 --> 00:05:26,167 be here today. 241 00:05:26,167 --> 00:05:27,727 Uh, I make the deals here, 242 00:05:27,733 --> 00:05:28,603 I'm the brains behind 243 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:29,970 the operation, okay? 244 00:05:29,967 --> 00:05:30,767 >> Right. 245 00:05:30,767 --> 00:05:31,427 >> He's the one who 246 00:05:31,433 --> 00:05:32,533 lost his hair, if you dig 247 00:05:32,533 --> 00:05:33,873 where I'm coming from. 248 00:05:33,867 --> 00:05:34,927 So he's always jealous and 249 00:05:34,933 --> 00:05:36,533 plus I'm the older brother, so-- 250 00:05:36,533 --> 00:05:37,503 I got him by eight minutes. 251 00:05:37,500 --> 00:05:38,300 And he'll tell you seven 252 00:05:38,300 --> 00:05:39,230 minutes, I'm sure, right? 253 00:05:39,233 --> 00:05:40,073 >> Mm-hmm. 254 00:05:40,067 --> 00:05:41,097 >> Yeah, it's eight minutes. 255 00:05:41,100 --> 00:05:42,130 So if you want to walk out of 256 00:05:42,133 --> 00:05:43,833 here with your head on straight, 257 00:05:43,833 --> 00:05:45,173 let me deal with you, okay? 258 00:05:45,167 --> 00:05:46,567 Did he get any info? 259 00:05:46,567 --> 00:05:47,467 >> No. 260 00:05:47,467 --> 00:05:48,127 >> He didn't run 261 00:05:48,133 --> 00:05:48,833 a credit on you? 262 00:05:48,833 --> 00:05:49,573 You know what, let me get you 263 00:05:49,567 --> 00:05:50,597 to start just-- just your 264 00:05:50,600 --> 00:05:51,630 name and address. 265 00:05:51,633 --> 00:05:53,133 You don't gotta put your social. 266 00:05:53,133 --> 00:05:54,303 I'll be right back, Ricardo. 267 00:05:54,300 --> 00:05:55,600 >> Okay, not a problem. 268 00:05:55,600 --> 00:05:56,330 >> Gonna head over to 269 00:05:56,333 --> 00:05:57,603 the car lot in a minute 270 00:05:57,600 --> 00:05:58,300 and we'll get you something 271 00:05:58,300 --> 00:05:58,970 real nice. 272 00:05:58,967 --> 00:06:00,327 >> All right. 273 00:06:00,333 --> 00:06:09,573 * 274 00:06:09,567 --> 00:06:11,497 >> Sorry about that, Ricardo. 275 00:06:11,500 --> 00:06:12,830 I had to, uh-- 276 00:06:12,833 --> 00:06:15,073 My mechanics giving me 277 00:06:15,067 --> 00:06:16,167 a nightmare out there. 278 00:06:16,167 --> 00:06:16,827 Where were we? 279 00:06:16,833 --> 00:06:17,673 I'm sorry. 280 00:06:17,667 --> 00:06:18,567 Where'd you get the, uh... 281 00:06:18,567 --> 00:06:19,267 >> Your brother just 282 00:06:19,267 --> 00:06:19,927 came through here, 283 00:06:19,933 --> 00:06:20,633 said he was going back there 284 00:06:20,633 --> 00:06:21,803 to look for you. 285 00:06:21,800 --> 00:06:22,630 >> Wait a second. 286 00:06:22,633 --> 00:06:23,373 Merle's here? 287 00:06:23,367 --> 00:06:24,527 >> Yeah. 288 00:06:24,533 --> 00:06:26,173 >> Oh yeah, he is. 289 00:06:26,167 --> 00:06:26,827 Let me guess, he made fun 290 00:06:26,833 --> 00:06:28,203 of me being bald, didn't he? 291 00:06:28,200 --> 00:06:29,200 >> Yeah. 292 00:06:29,200 --> 00:06:30,200 >> I knew it. 293 00:06:30,200 --> 00:06:31,100 You know he paid five grand 294 00:06:31,100 --> 00:06:32,070 for his hair, right? 295 00:06:32,067 --> 00:06:32,927 >> Oh, did he? 296 00:06:32,933 --> 00:06:33,703 >> Me and him are sort of in 297 00:06:33,700 --> 00:06:35,130 a little bit of a family feud. 298 00:06:35,133 --> 00:06:36,173 I'm sure he told you he's 299 00:06:36,167 --> 00:06:37,197 running operations here, right? 300 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:37,930 >> Right. 301 00:06:37,933 --> 00:06:38,673 >> Of course. 302 00:06:38,667 --> 00:06:40,067 No, he's not running anything. 303 00:06:40,067 --> 00:06:41,227 He's running his fourth divorce 304 00:06:41,233 --> 00:06:42,303 is what he's running, 305 00:06:42,300 --> 00:06:43,130 you know what I mean? 306 00:06:43,133 --> 00:06:43,873 You see his outfit? 307 00:06:43,867 --> 00:06:44,627 I mean, come on. 308 00:06:44,633 --> 00:06:45,373 >> Yeah. 309 00:06:45,367 --> 00:06:46,267 >> Who dresses like this, buddy? 310 00:06:46,267 --> 00:06:47,227 This ain't 1991. 311 00:06:47,233 --> 00:06:47,933 >> That's what I thought 312 00:06:47,933 --> 00:06:48,673 when he walked in too. 313 00:06:48,667 --> 00:06:49,327 >> I'm gonna have a little 314 00:06:49,333 --> 00:06:50,073 talk with Merle. 315 00:06:50,067 --> 00:06:50,867 I'll be right back, Ricardo. 316 00:06:50,867 --> 00:06:56,467 Take your time with that. 317 00:06:56,467 --> 00:06:57,727 Yo, man, you better back up 318 00:06:57,733 --> 00:06:59,073 off with my customer, (beep)! 319 00:06:59,067 --> 00:07:00,397 No, no, no, no, no, no, no... 320 00:07:00,400 --> 00:07:01,530 Watch out, yo, man, don't be-- 321 00:07:01,533 --> 00:07:02,403 (banging) 322 00:07:02,400 --> 00:07:03,170 Yo, man, I ain't 323 00:07:03,167 --> 00:07:03,897 playin' that (beep)! 324 00:07:03,900 --> 00:07:05,700 (clattering) 325 00:07:05,700 --> 00:07:07,070 Ah, you son of a (beep)! 326 00:07:07,067 --> 00:07:07,897 (clattering) 327 00:07:07,900 --> 00:07:09,070 Damn. 328 00:07:09,067 --> 00:07:11,627 Ah. 329 00:07:11,633 --> 00:07:13,073 I'm sorry, partner, you didn't 330 00:07:13,067 --> 00:07:13,927 need to witness this. 331 00:07:13,933 --> 00:07:14,803 >> You all right? 332 00:07:14,800 --> 00:07:15,470 >> The question is, 333 00:07:15,467 --> 00:07:16,127 is he all right? 334 00:07:16,133 --> 00:07:17,603 He's out cold. 335 00:07:17,600 --> 00:07:18,830 Am I even there? 336 00:07:18,833 --> 00:07:19,673 Is that even? 337 00:07:19,667 --> 00:07:20,827 I'm looking straight? 338 00:07:20,833 --> 00:07:22,373 >> No, no, it's coming off. 339 00:07:22,367 --> 00:07:23,197 >> Fix it, please. 340 00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:23,870 >> No, no, I'm not gonna 341 00:07:23,867 --> 00:07:24,767 touch your hair. 342 00:07:24,767 --> 00:07:25,497 >> Oh, come on, partner. 343 00:07:25,500 --> 00:07:26,230 Please, please, please. 344 00:07:26,233 --> 00:07:27,473 This is $5,000, man. 345 00:07:27,467 --> 00:07:29,297 I can't mess it up. 346 00:07:29,300 --> 00:07:31,070 These plugs weren't cheap. 347 00:07:31,067 --> 00:07:32,897 >> Yeah, uh, no. 348 00:07:32,900 --> 00:07:33,870 >> Just push it down, 349 00:07:33,867 --> 00:07:34,667 there you go, push down 350 00:07:34,667 --> 00:07:35,427 on the other side. 351 00:07:35,433 --> 00:07:36,103 >> All right. 352 00:07:36,100 --> 00:07:36,900 >> All right, how's it looking? 353 00:07:36,900 --> 00:07:37,570 We straight? 354 00:07:37,567 --> 00:07:38,267 >> You're better, yeah. 355 00:07:38,267 --> 00:07:39,067 >> All right. 356 00:07:39,067 --> 00:07:40,397 I apologize, man. 357 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:41,330 I apologize. 358 00:07:41,333 --> 00:07:42,633 That was unprofessional. 359 00:07:42,633 --> 00:07:43,333 I'll tell you what. 360 00:07:43,333 --> 00:07:44,173 We'll put Earl out of 361 00:07:44,167 --> 00:07:45,497 the picture for now 362 00:07:45,500 --> 00:07:46,370 and we'll let you deal with 363 00:07:46,367 --> 00:07:47,897 Ed Bassmaster instead. 364 00:07:47,900 --> 00:07:48,770 >> So this is gonna lower this 365 00:07:48,767 --> 00:07:50,327 craziness down a little bit? 366 00:07:50,333 --> 00:07:51,703 >> Yeah, Ed Bassmaster, he's in 367 00:07:51,700 --> 00:07:53,070 charge of the operation of 368 00:07:53,067 --> 00:07:55,067 this TV show that you're on. 369 00:07:55,067 --> 00:07:56,067 And you're on my new show called 370 00:07:56,067 --> 00:07:57,067 "The Ed Bassmaster Show." 371 00:07:57,100 --> 00:07:57,970 All right, partner. 372 00:07:57,967 --> 00:07:58,667 >> Weird. 373 00:08:00,900 --> 00:08:02,530 >> * Would y'all look at this? 374 00:08:02,533 --> 00:08:04,433 * Would y'all look at that? 375 00:08:04,433 --> 00:08:06,373 * Would ya'll look at this? 376 00:08:06,367 --> 00:08:08,267 * Would y'all look at that? 377 00:08:08,267 --> 00:08:10,167 * Would y'all look at this? 378 00:08:10,167 --> 00:08:12,067 * Would y'all look at that? 379 00:08:12,067 --> 00:08:13,867 * Would y'all look at this? 380 00:08:13,900 --> 00:08:15,800 * Would y'all look at that? * 381 00:08:15,833 --> 00:08:16,803 >> Welcome to 382 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:18,270 Single & Ready 2 Mingle, 383 00:08:18,267 --> 00:08:19,797 a video dating service. 384 00:08:19,833 --> 00:08:21,603 Meet our newest bachelor, 385 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:22,700 Skippy. 386 00:08:22,733 --> 00:08:24,073 >> Hey, ladies, my name's 387 00:08:24,067 --> 00:08:26,067 Skippy Sankowitz. 388 00:08:26,067 --> 00:08:27,167 Everybody that knows me 389 00:08:27,167 --> 00:08:28,327 calls me Skippy. 390 00:08:28,333 --> 00:08:31,733 I like to bike-ride. 391 00:08:31,733 --> 00:08:32,733 If you're looking for a guy 392 00:08:32,733 --> 00:08:33,673 who will pay for at least 393 00:08:33,667 --> 00:08:36,197 half the meal... let me know. 394 00:08:36,200 --> 00:08:38,070 'Cause I will. 395 00:08:38,067 --> 00:08:40,067 So I live with my grandmom. 396 00:08:40,067 --> 00:08:41,627 Uh, I have the whole entire 397 00:08:41,633 --> 00:08:43,703 upstairs to myself. 398 00:08:43,700 --> 00:08:44,470 So it's basically like 399 00:08:44,467 --> 00:08:45,597 my own apartment. 400 00:08:45,600 --> 00:08:46,600 But she's not even allowed up 401 00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:47,500 here unless she knocks. 402 00:08:47,533 --> 00:08:49,433 * 403 00:08:50,533 --> 00:08:52,433 (siren blaring) 404 00:08:52,433 --> 00:08:56,303 * 405 00:08:56,300 --> 00:08:58,570 (water running) 406 00:08:58,567 --> 00:08:59,367 Yo, yo, yo, what's good? 407 00:08:59,367 --> 00:09:01,127 It's your boy Always Teste. 408 00:09:01,133 --> 00:09:02,573 (mumbles incoherently) 409 00:09:02,567 --> 00:09:03,667 You know what I'm saying? 410 00:09:03,667 --> 00:09:04,327 And today I've got 411 00:09:04,333 --> 00:09:05,603 a job interview 412 00:09:05,600 --> 00:09:06,270 and I'm bringing my 413 00:09:06,267 --> 00:09:07,667 probation officer along with me 414 00:09:07,667 --> 00:09:08,697 on the job interview. 415 00:09:08,733 --> 00:09:10,673 AKA my boy Jack Vale. 416 00:09:13,467 --> 00:09:14,097 >> Hi, this is Teste, 417 00:09:14,100 --> 00:09:15,070 I'm his parole officer. 418 00:09:15,067 --> 00:09:15,697 >> Teste? 419 00:09:15,700 --> 00:09:16,930 >> Yeah, what's going on, dog? 420 00:09:16,933 --> 00:09:17,903 >> It's going good, man? 421 00:09:17,900 --> 00:09:18,630 >> How you been? 422 00:09:18,633 --> 00:09:19,603 >> All right. 423 00:09:19,600 --> 00:09:21,900 * 424 00:09:21,900 --> 00:09:22,600 All right, let's see here. 425 00:09:22,600 --> 00:09:25,100 So, um, why don't you go ahead 426 00:09:25,100 --> 00:09:26,200 and tell me about, you know, 427 00:09:26,200 --> 00:09:27,770 the last job that you did have? 428 00:09:27,767 --> 00:09:29,697 >> Well, the last job I had 429 00:09:29,700 --> 00:09:30,900 was community service. 430 00:09:30,900 --> 00:09:31,900 >> Okay. 431 00:09:31,900 --> 00:09:34,070 >> I had to do it for 90 days. 432 00:09:34,067 --> 00:09:35,397 So once it was done, I was done, 433 00:09:35,400 --> 00:09:36,170 you know what I'm saying? 434 00:09:36,167 --> 00:09:37,467 I didn't have to stick around. 435 00:09:37,467 --> 00:09:38,897 >> What were you doing 436 00:09:38,900 --> 00:09:40,370 the community service for? 437 00:09:40,367 --> 00:09:42,067 >> Well, I got in a situation 438 00:09:42,067 --> 00:09:43,197 where I got in trouble 439 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:44,130 with the law. 440 00:09:44,133 --> 00:09:44,933 >> Okay. 441 00:09:44,933 --> 00:09:45,873 >> You know what I'm saying? 442 00:09:45,867 --> 00:09:46,867 And, you know, I used to do 443 00:09:46,867 --> 00:09:47,567 a lot of stuff, 444 00:09:47,567 --> 00:09:48,397 I ain't going to lie. 445 00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:49,130 >> Right. 446 00:09:49,133 --> 00:09:50,073 >> You know what I'm saying? 447 00:09:50,067 --> 00:09:50,697 But now I'm trying to get 448 00:09:50,700 --> 00:09:51,700 my act together. 449 00:09:51,700 --> 00:09:52,570 You know what I'm saying? 450 00:09:52,567 --> 00:09:53,397 On the "strempf." 451 00:09:53,400 --> 00:09:54,870 And just try to go on 452 00:09:54,867 --> 00:09:55,697 the right path. 453 00:09:55,700 --> 00:09:56,500 You know what I'm saying? 454 00:09:56,500 --> 00:09:58,530 The last job that I had, 455 00:09:58,533 --> 00:09:59,873 the supervisor is actually 456 00:09:59,867 --> 00:10:01,067 how I got in trouble. 457 00:10:01,067 --> 00:10:02,697 Because what happened was 458 00:10:02,700 --> 00:10:03,530 I fell asleep 459 00:10:03,533 --> 00:10:04,603 in the break room 460 00:10:04,600 --> 00:10:05,670 and he came in and woke me up 461 00:10:05,667 --> 00:10:07,067 and started yelling at me, 462 00:10:07,067 --> 00:10:07,967 so I had to put him in his 463 00:10:07,967 --> 00:10:08,927 place, you know what I'm saying? 464 00:10:08,933 --> 00:10:10,073 You know what I'm saying? 465 00:10:10,067 --> 00:10:11,367 I don't mind working but 466 00:10:11,367 --> 00:10:12,927 I don't take that from nobody. 467 00:10:12,933 --> 00:10:13,703 You know what I'm saying? 468 00:10:13,700 --> 00:10:14,470 You don't treat somebody 469 00:10:14,467 --> 00:10:15,267 disrespectful like that. 470 00:10:15,267 --> 00:10:16,127 A lot of the jobs that I apply 471 00:10:16,133 --> 00:10:17,403 for want me to show up at like 472 00:10:17,400 --> 00:10:18,800 9:00 in the morning 473 00:10:18,800 --> 00:10:20,200 and stay all day. 474 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:21,230 And I got other stuff to do, 475 00:10:21,233 --> 00:10:21,973 so I can't really 476 00:10:21,967 --> 00:10:22,697 stick around all day. 477 00:10:22,700 --> 00:10:23,530 >> Teste, if you're going to get 478 00:10:23,533 --> 00:10:24,703 a job, you have to be prepared 479 00:10:24,700 --> 00:10:26,100 to stay all day. 480 00:10:26,100 --> 00:10:26,870 >> Okay. 481 00:10:26,867 --> 00:10:27,767 >> Especially in retail. 482 00:10:27,767 --> 00:10:29,827 Retail's a big thing. 483 00:10:29,833 --> 00:10:30,733 >> Whoa, whoa, whoa, Teste! 484 00:10:30,733 --> 00:10:31,533 Teste, Teste, 485 00:10:31,533 --> 00:10:32,703 what are you doing? 486 00:10:32,700 --> 00:10:33,670 >> I'm just getting a drink, 487 00:10:33,667 --> 00:10:35,167 I'm thirsty. 488 00:10:35,167 --> 00:10:35,867 I'm over 21, 489 00:10:35,867 --> 00:10:36,627 I'm allowed to drink. 490 00:10:36,633 --> 00:10:37,403 >> Come on, Teste. 491 00:10:37,400 --> 00:10:38,270 You can't do that here. 492 00:10:38,267 --> 00:10:38,927 >> When I talk a lot, 493 00:10:38,933 --> 00:10:39,873 my mouth get dry. 494 00:10:39,867 --> 00:10:40,597 >> No, that's fine-- 495 00:10:40,600 --> 00:10:41,430 >> Okay? 496 00:10:41,433 --> 00:10:42,273 So I need to get a sip. 497 00:10:42,267 --> 00:10:43,067 >> You should have known better 498 00:10:43,067 --> 00:10:43,897 not to bring this to-- 499 00:10:43,900 --> 00:10:45,470 to a job interview. 500 00:10:45,467 --> 00:10:46,567 >> My bad! 501 00:10:46,567 --> 00:10:47,267 >> Well, you can't 502 00:10:47,267 --> 00:10:48,167 drink on the job. 503 00:10:48,167 --> 00:10:48,967 >> I ain't going to drink-- 504 00:10:48,967 --> 00:10:49,697 This ain't the job. 505 00:10:49,700 --> 00:10:51,100 This the interview. 506 00:10:51,100 --> 00:10:51,770 I ain't going to drink 507 00:10:51,767 --> 00:10:52,667 on the job. 508 00:10:52,667 --> 00:10:53,367 >> Yeah, I hear you, man. 509 00:10:53,367 --> 00:10:54,267 It's cool. 510 00:10:54,267 --> 00:10:55,597 Um, what types of people seem 511 00:10:55,600 --> 00:10:57,130 to rub you the wrong way? 512 00:10:57,133 --> 00:10:58,303 >> People like him, 513 00:10:58,300 --> 00:10:59,870 who try to tell me what to do. 514 00:10:59,867 --> 00:11:01,227 Can you talk to this dude? 515 00:11:01,233 --> 00:11:02,073 He's asking me some 516 00:11:02,067 --> 00:11:03,227 crazy questions. 517 00:11:03,233 --> 00:11:04,503 >> Did he offend you in any way? 518 00:11:04,500 --> 00:11:05,300 >> Well, yeah, he said, 519 00:11:05,300 --> 00:11:06,700 you know, I can't fall asleep 520 00:11:06,700 --> 00:11:08,070 on the job, I can't smoke weed 521 00:11:08,067 --> 00:11:08,727 on the job, 522 00:11:08,733 --> 00:11:10,103 I can't drink on the job. 523 00:11:10,100 --> 00:11:11,330 >> That's really a requirement 524 00:11:11,333 --> 00:11:12,973 that's a normal thing for a-- 525 00:11:12,967 --> 00:11:14,067 question asked that 526 00:11:14,067 --> 00:11:15,067 you cannot do that on the job. 527 00:11:15,067 --> 00:11:16,097 >> And I agreed. 528 00:11:16,100 --> 00:11:17,600 I tried to kind of back that up 529 00:11:17,600 --> 00:11:18,670 and explain to him 530 00:11:18,667 --> 00:11:20,367 that he cannot drink. 531 00:11:20,367 --> 00:11:22,397 I was upset he brought a-- 532 00:11:22,400 --> 00:11:23,070 >> He brought a 40 533 00:11:23,067 --> 00:11:23,767 to the interview? 534 00:11:23,767 --> 00:11:24,427 >> He brought a 40 535 00:11:24,433 --> 00:11:25,103 to the interview 536 00:11:25,100 --> 00:11:25,770 >> That's his. 537 00:11:25,767 --> 00:11:26,427 That 40's his. 538 00:11:26,433 --> 00:11:27,303 He gave it to me, dog. 539 00:11:27,300 --> 00:11:28,270 He gave it to me. 540 00:11:28,267 --> 00:11:29,067 >> Hold on a second, he's one 541 00:11:29,067 --> 00:11:30,167 of my top managers that-- 542 00:11:30,167 --> 00:11:31,067 >> He gave-- dog, 543 00:11:31,067 --> 00:11:31,827 tell him the truth. 544 00:11:31,833 --> 00:11:33,073 You gave it to me. 545 00:11:33,067 --> 00:11:34,927 >> No, Teste, that was your 40. 546 00:11:34,933 --> 00:11:36,073 >> Obviously, if you're bringing 547 00:11:36,067 --> 00:11:37,067 a 40 the job, 548 00:11:37,067 --> 00:11:37,967 we cannot hire you. 549 00:11:37,967 --> 00:11:38,967 >> Oh, you gotta be trippin', 550 00:11:38,967 --> 00:11:39,767 dog, you trippin'. 551 00:11:39,767 --> 00:11:40,597 >> I did take it away from him 552 00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:41,470 before he took a drink. 553 00:11:41,467 --> 00:11:42,197 >> Yeah, he was 554 00:11:42,200 --> 00:11:42,930 drinking it, right? 555 00:11:42,933 --> 00:11:43,773 You seen him drink it, right? 556 00:11:43,767 --> 00:11:44,797 >> Huh? 557 00:11:44,800 --> 00:11:45,770 No, that-- that's 558 00:11:45,767 --> 00:11:47,067 neither here nor there. 559 00:11:47,067 --> 00:11:47,767 >> Thought you were 560 00:11:47,767 --> 00:11:48,467 a parole officer? 561 00:11:48,467 --> 00:11:49,327 >> Why don't you reintroduce 562 00:11:49,333 --> 00:11:50,433 this guy, and we start 563 00:11:50,433 --> 00:11:51,233 from scratch? 564 00:11:51,233 --> 00:11:51,903 >> Okay, I'm gonna 565 00:11:51,900 --> 00:11:52,670 introduce you. 566 00:11:52,667 --> 00:11:53,467 >> Okay. 567 00:11:53,467 --> 00:11:55,727 >> Josh, this is Ed Bassmaster. 568 00:11:55,733 --> 00:11:56,773 >> I'm sitting here like, 569 00:11:56,767 --> 00:11:57,727 "What the heck?" 570 00:11:57,733 --> 00:11:59,333 (laughing) 571 00:11:59,333 --> 00:12:00,703 Oh my God. 572 00:12:00,700 --> 00:12:01,430 I was sitting here like, 573 00:12:01,433 --> 00:12:02,233 "What the heck am I gonna do?" 574 00:12:02,267 --> 00:12:03,127 >> Right there there's a camera. 575 00:12:03,133 --> 00:12:03,873 There's a camera behind you. 576 00:12:03,867 --> 00:12:04,727 (all laughing) 577 00:12:07,067 --> 00:12:14,127 * 578 00:12:14,133 --> 00:12:22,073 * 579 00:12:22,067 --> 00:12:23,727 >> Merry Christmas! 580 00:12:23,733 --> 00:12:24,773 How you doin'? 581 00:12:24,800 --> 00:12:26,400 * 582 00:12:31,933 --> 00:12:33,133 Merry Christmas! 583 00:12:33,133 --> 00:12:34,133 (woman screaming) 584 00:12:34,133 --> 00:12:37,073 How are ya? 585 00:12:37,067 --> 00:12:38,297 Gotcha. 586 00:12:38,300 --> 00:12:42,100 Merry Christmas. 587 00:12:42,100 --> 00:12:47,300 Merry Christmas, everybody! 588 00:12:47,300 --> 00:12:49,070 Can you hand me that, please? 589 00:12:49,067 --> 00:12:52,367 (man laughing) 590 00:12:52,367 --> 00:12:54,667 Thanks, boss. 591 00:12:54,700 --> 00:12:56,070 Hey, guys, Brett Sellars here. 592 00:12:56,067 --> 00:12:57,627 We're here at Picnic TV. 593 00:12:57,633 --> 00:12:58,533 We're gonna walk around 594 00:12:58,533 --> 00:12:59,603 and find out what the heck 595 00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:01,070 everybody's eating out here. 596 00:13:01,067 --> 00:13:02,427 How you doing today? 597 00:13:02,433 --> 00:13:03,233 See she had some 598 00:13:03,233 --> 00:13:04,073 mushroom pizza there. 599 00:13:04,067 --> 00:13:04,727 Looks like they were 600 00:13:04,733 --> 00:13:08,073 kind of hungry, folks. 601 00:13:08,067 --> 00:13:08,967 How you ladies doing today? 602 00:13:08,967 --> 00:13:09,727 Brett Sellars. 603 00:13:09,767 --> 00:13:10,827 What's on the menu? 604 00:13:11,867 --> 00:13:12,527 Couscous. 605 00:13:12,533 --> 00:13:13,803 Exciting stuff over here, folks. 606 00:13:13,800 --> 00:13:14,970 * 607 00:13:14,967 --> 00:13:15,627 Brett Sellars here 608 00:13:15,633 --> 00:13:16,333 with Picnic TV. 609 00:13:16,333 --> 00:13:17,173 I'm here with Courtney, 610 00:13:17,167 --> 00:13:17,927 who is trying to find 611 00:13:17,967 --> 00:13:19,127 her friends 612 00:13:19,133 --> 00:13:19,973 who are engaging in 613 00:13:19,967 --> 00:13:21,567 a delicious picnic. 614 00:13:21,567 --> 00:13:22,367 >> Yup. 615 00:13:22,367 --> 00:13:23,527 >> What's on the menu today? 616 00:13:23,567 --> 00:13:25,797 >> Um... sandwiches. 617 00:13:25,800 --> 00:13:26,970 >> Sandwiches. 618 00:13:26,967 --> 00:13:28,067 There you have it, folks. 619 00:13:28,067 --> 00:13:29,227 What can you tell us about 620 00:13:29,233 --> 00:13:30,573 what you're eating today? 621 00:13:30,567 --> 00:13:31,497 >> It's really good. 622 00:13:31,500 --> 00:13:32,570 It's fresh tasting. 623 00:13:32,567 --> 00:13:33,267 >> Aesthetic too, 624 00:13:33,267 --> 00:13:34,367 because it looks beautiful. 625 00:13:34,367 --> 00:13:35,467 Brett Sellars here, we're 626 00:13:35,467 --> 00:13:36,567 following up on a story that 627 00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,300 we brought to you earlier, 628 00:13:38,300 --> 00:13:39,530 where we met up with Courtney, 629 00:13:39,533 --> 00:13:40,873 who was on her way to 630 00:13:40,867 --> 00:13:42,327 a delicious picnic, 631 00:13:42,367 --> 00:13:43,167 and we're going to bring 632 00:13:43,167 --> 00:13:45,067 the story live to you. 633 00:13:45,067 --> 00:13:47,297 In three... two 634 00:13:47,300 --> 00:13:49,500 and one. 635 00:13:49,533 --> 00:13:50,333 Courtney, hey, Brett Sellars 636 00:13:50,333 --> 00:13:51,173 back again with you 637 00:13:51,167 --> 00:13:51,927 with Picnic TV. 638 00:13:51,933 --> 00:13:52,703 We found you! 639 00:13:52,700 --> 00:13:53,400 >> Hey. 640 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:54,170 >> What's going on on 641 00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:55,267 the picnic blanket? 642 00:13:55,267 --> 00:13:56,367 >> Um, you're on my 643 00:13:56,367 --> 00:13:58,167 jean jacket right now. 644 00:13:58,200 --> 00:13:59,830 >> How do we see Picnic TV? 645 00:13:59,833 --> 00:14:01,103 >> Picnic TV will be on my 646 00:14:01,100 --> 00:14:02,600 hit smash TV show called 647 00:14:02,600 --> 00:14:03,730 "The Ed Bassmaster Show." 648 00:14:03,733 --> 00:14:04,703 It's coming out this fall. 649 00:14:04,700 --> 00:14:06,270 >> Shut up! 650 00:14:06,267 --> 00:14:07,697 Shut up! 651 00:14:07,700 --> 00:14:09,600 Oh my God, we love you! 652 00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:10,800 >> There you have it, folks. 653 00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:11,600 There you have it. 654 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:12,400 >> No way. 655 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:13,230 >> Hey, I'm Jeff. 656 00:14:13,233 --> 00:14:14,173 >> And I'm Hally. 657 00:14:14,167 --> 00:14:15,397 >> And today I've got some 658 00:14:15,400 --> 00:14:16,600 movers coming over to help me 659 00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:17,970 break up with her. 660 00:14:18,067 --> 00:14:19,397 * 661 00:14:22,233 --> 00:14:22,873 Hey, guys. 662 00:14:22,867 --> 00:14:23,527 >> Hi! 663 00:14:23,533 --> 00:14:24,203 >> How's it going, man? 664 00:14:24,200 --> 00:14:24,870 I'm Benny. 665 00:14:24,867 --> 00:14:25,527 >> Benny? 666 00:14:25,533 --> 00:14:26,273 >> Nice to meet you. 667 00:14:26,267 --> 00:14:26,967 >> Hey, man, Jeff. 668 00:14:26,967 --> 00:14:27,897 >> Hey, I'm Hally. 669 00:14:27,900 --> 00:14:29,070 Nice to meet you too. 670 00:14:29,067 --> 00:14:29,797 >> As you can see, it's like 671 00:14:29,800 --> 00:14:30,930 a total mess in here. 672 00:14:30,933 --> 00:14:32,703 Everything's gonna go. 673 00:14:32,700 --> 00:14:33,370 >> I'm gonna get something 674 00:14:33,367 --> 00:14:34,097 for you. 675 00:14:34,100 --> 00:14:35,670 Like lemonade, cookies? 676 00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:36,927 Yeah? 677 00:14:36,933 --> 00:14:37,703 >> I'm all right for now. 678 00:14:37,700 --> 00:14:39,230 >> He's good with the cookies. 679 00:14:39,233 --> 00:14:40,433 He's a cookie monster. 680 00:14:40,433 --> 00:14:41,733 >> I'll be back in a second. 681 00:14:41,733 --> 00:14:42,573 >> Sorry about that. 682 00:14:42,567 --> 00:14:43,427 >> Don't worry about it. 683 00:14:43,433 --> 00:14:44,833 >> She's like overly friendly. 684 00:14:44,833 --> 00:14:45,733 >> It's fine. 685 00:14:45,733 --> 00:14:46,673 >> And she like-- she'll keep 686 00:14:46,667 --> 00:14:47,727 asking and asking, just-- 687 00:14:47,733 --> 00:14:49,333 She's driving me nuts. 688 00:14:49,333 --> 00:14:50,373 (all laughing) 689 00:14:50,367 --> 00:14:52,127 So, uh, dude, I'm bouncing her. 690 00:14:52,133 --> 00:14:53,233 She's outta here. 691 00:14:53,233 --> 00:14:53,933 I'm throwing her 692 00:14:53,933 --> 00:14:55,073 out of the house. 693 00:14:55,067 --> 00:14:56,427 And the only way I could do it 694 00:14:56,433 --> 00:14:57,433 is by saying that we bought 695 00:14:57,433 --> 00:14:58,873 a house and getting movers 696 00:14:58,867 --> 00:15:00,267 here to move her stuff out. 697 00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:02,097 >> Okay! 698 00:15:02,100 --> 00:15:03,300 Here you go. 699 00:15:03,300 --> 00:15:04,200 >> Thank you. 700 00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:05,900 >> Yeah, of course. 701 00:15:05,900 --> 00:15:07,630 Oh my gosh. 702 00:15:07,633 --> 00:15:08,403 All right, I'm going upstairs 703 00:15:08,400 --> 00:15:09,130 really quickly. 704 00:15:09,133 --> 00:15:09,803 >> Go for it. 705 00:15:09,800 --> 00:15:10,470 >> To take care of things. 706 00:15:10,467 --> 00:15:13,797 Thanks a lot! 707 00:15:13,800 --> 00:15:15,170 >> Anyhow, all this stuff 708 00:15:15,167 --> 00:15:19,397 over here, this is all hers. 709 00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:20,100 She's not gonna miss 710 00:15:20,100 --> 00:15:21,900 half of this stuff. 711 00:15:21,900 --> 00:15:22,800 I just want to get her 712 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:24,830 personal belongs out first. 713 00:15:24,833 --> 00:15:25,633 Dude, it's only gonna take 714 00:15:25,633 --> 00:15:26,973 ten minutes, fifteen minutes 715 00:15:26,967 --> 00:15:28,597 to get all of her stuff out. 716 00:15:28,600 --> 00:15:29,970 I'm just trying to think of 717 00:15:29,967 --> 00:15:30,727 how to say it to her. 718 00:15:30,733 --> 00:15:31,733 Like what do I say? 719 00:15:31,733 --> 00:15:32,533 What would you do? 720 00:15:32,533 --> 00:15:33,873 What if I go out front 721 00:15:33,867 --> 00:15:36,067 and then when she comes down, 722 00:15:36,067 --> 00:15:36,897 one of you guys-- 723 00:15:36,900 --> 00:15:38,330 whoever wants to-- 724 00:15:38,333 --> 00:15:40,333 break it to her, right? 725 00:15:40,333 --> 00:15:41,073 I'm not even joking. 726 00:15:41,067 --> 00:15:42,167 (Hally yelling) 727 00:15:42,167 --> 00:15:43,367 What was that? 728 00:15:43,367 --> 00:15:45,067 Oh hey. 729 00:15:45,067 --> 00:15:46,567 >> Oh my God, I couldn't-- 730 00:15:46,567 --> 00:15:47,627 I couldn't wait to tell you. 731 00:15:47,633 --> 00:15:48,333 This is insane. 732 00:15:48,333 --> 00:15:49,533 I... 733 00:15:49,533 --> 00:15:52,603 (sighing) 734 00:15:52,600 --> 00:15:54,200 We're pregnant. 735 00:15:54,200 --> 00:15:54,900 >> What do you mean, 736 00:15:54,900 --> 00:15:56,370 "We're pregnant"? 737 00:15:56,367 --> 00:15:57,727 >> Yes, can you believe that?! 738 00:15:57,733 --> 00:15:58,533 >> Really? 739 00:15:58,533 --> 00:15:59,733 >> Yeah! 740 00:15:59,733 --> 00:16:01,833 Oh my God, sweetie! 741 00:16:01,833 --> 00:16:07,973 Oh my God! 742 00:16:07,967 --> 00:16:09,567 >> Guys, guys, please, uh... 743 00:16:09,567 --> 00:16:10,527 Hon, I'll be right back. 744 00:16:10,533 --> 00:16:11,533 >> Okay, hold on. 745 00:16:11,533 --> 00:16:12,333 >> Guys, come here. 746 00:16:12,333 --> 00:16:14,103 I got an idea. 747 00:16:14,100 --> 00:16:15,200 Hally, can you-- 748 00:16:15,200 --> 00:16:16,170 >> Yeah? 749 00:16:16,167 --> 00:16:17,897 >> Instead of moving her out, 750 00:16:17,900 --> 00:16:21,070 how about we just prank you guys 751 00:16:21,067 --> 00:16:22,097 and make you think that this 752 00:16:22,100 --> 00:16:24,500 whole situation is real... 753 00:16:24,500 --> 00:16:25,800 when it's not? 754 00:16:25,800 --> 00:16:27,670 Look at... 755 00:16:27,667 --> 00:16:28,867 This whole thing is for 756 00:16:28,867 --> 00:16:29,667 my TV show called 757 00:16:29,700 --> 00:16:30,630 "The Ed Bassmaster Show." 758 00:16:30,633 --> 00:16:31,673 >> That's insane, dude. 759 00:16:33,500 --> 00:16:34,770 * 760 00:16:34,767 --> 00:16:35,867 >> Oh. 761 00:16:35,867 --> 00:16:40,967 (woman screaming) 762 00:16:40,967 --> 00:16:41,697 >> Welcome to 763 00:16:41,700 --> 00:16:43,270 Single & Ready 2 Mingle, 764 00:16:43,267 --> 00:16:44,867 a video dating service. 765 00:16:44,900 --> 00:16:46,470 Meet our newest bachelor, 766 00:16:46,467 --> 00:16:47,567 Skippy. 767 00:16:47,567 --> 00:16:50,267 >> I'm looking for a girl with 768 00:16:50,267 --> 00:16:52,597 hair and ears 769 00:16:52,600 --> 00:16:55,670 and two eyes. 770 00:16:55,667 --> 00:16:58,127 I like a woman with some mouth. 771 00:16:58,133 --> 00:16:59,603 Um... 772 00:17:01,067 --> 00:17:03,597 A head and shoulders. 773 00:17:03,600 --> 00:17:04,430 It helps if they have 774 00:17:04,433 --> 00:17:05,433 a couple of arms. 775 00:17:05,433 --> 00:17:06,803 Um... 776 00:17:08,267 --> 00:17:10,067 And hips and legs and 777 00:17:10,067 --> 00:17:10,927 all the way down to the toes 778 00:17:10,933 --> 00:17:11,873 I guess is the kind of woman 779 00:17:11,867 --> 00:17:13,097 I'm looking for. 780 00:17:13,133 --> 00:17:14,073 So if you want to go out 781 00:17:14,067 --> 00:17:16,767 on a date, let me know. 782 00:17:16,767 --> 00:17:17,427 Let me know if you like 783 00:17:17,433 --> 00:17:19,073 Chinese food or Mexican 784 00:17:19,067 --> 00:17:19,767 or Italian. 785 00:17:19,767 --> 00:17:21,627 Either one I'll go along 786 00:17:21,633 --> 00:17:22,473 on a date with you 787 00:17:22,467 --> 00:17:24,127 to them places. 788 00:17:24,133 --> 00:17:25,603 Anywhere. 789 00:17:25,633 --> 00:17:27,133 * 790 00:17:29,167 --> 00:17:41,067 * 791 00:17:41,067 --> 00:17:41,767 You all set? 792 00:17:41,767 --> 00:17:42,927 What did you end up going with? 793 00:17:42,933 --> 00:17:44,633 >> Uh, the rib-eye. 794 00:17:44,633 --> 00:17:45,533 >> The rib-eye? 795 00:17:45,533 --> 00:17:46,573 >> Yeah, burrito. 796 00:17:46,567 --> 00:17:48,067 >> Okay, burrito? 797 00:17:48,067 --> 00:17:48,727 All right, we're gonna need to 798 00:17:48,733 --> 00:17:50,073 pat this down actually. 799 00:17:50,100 --> 00:17:51,770 * 800 00:17:53,300 --> 00:17:54,570 If you want to step up-- 801 00:17:54,567 --> 00:17:55,867 Copy that. 802 00:17:55,867 --> 00:17:57,397 Agent Bassmaster with the FCIA. 803 00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:58,130 If I could just have you 804 00:17:58,133 --> 00:17:59,103 walk this way, sir. 805 00:17:59,100 --> 00:18:00,130 Agent Bassmaster 806 00:18:00,133 --> 00:18:01,073 with the FCIA. 807 00:18:01,067 --> 00:18:01,827 That's the Food Cart 808 00:18:01,833 --> 00:18:03,233 Intelligence Agency. 809 00:18:03,233 --> 00:18:04,433 Protecting the citizens 810 00:18:04,433 --> 00:18:06,503 one food cart at a time. 811 00:18:06,500 --> 00:18:07,200 This area is under 812 00:18:07,200 --> 00:18:08,500 24-hour surveillance. 813 00:18:08,500 --> 00:18:09,730 >> Okay, why's that? 814 00:18:09,733 --> 00:18:10,933 >> Well, last week we had 815 00:18:10,933 --> 00:18:13,073 to diffuse two tacos. 816 00:18:13,067 --> 00:18:14,427 I got a burrito sniffing dog 817 00:18:14,433 --> 00:18:16,133 on-site right now. 818 00:18:16,133 --> 00:18:16,803 Food's coming through, 819 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:18,170 food's coming through. 820 00:18:18,167 --> 00:18:18,967 >> There you go, boss. 821 00:18:18,967 --> 00:18:19,967 >> There we go, buddy. 822 00:18:19,967 --> 00:18:20,627 All right, right this 823 00:18:20,633 --> 00:18:22,073 way, buddy. 824 00:18:22,067 --> 00:18:22,927 Okay, that way. 825 00:18:22,933 --> 00:18:24,373 He's coming that way. 826 00:18:24,367 --> 00:18:25,767 He's fleeing the scene. 827 00:18:25,767 --> 00:18:26,797 He's fleeing the scene. 828 00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:27,800 I need backup here. 829 00:18:27,800 --> 00:18:30,270 He's fleeing the scene. 830 00:18:30,267 --> 00:18:31,497 Get in here, damn it! 831 00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:32,300 Wait a minute. 832 00:18:32,333 --> 00:18:33,403 What's y'all's name? 833 00:18:33,400 --> 00:18:34,430 >> LoCash. 834 00:18:34,433 --> 00:18:35,673 >> LoCash. 835 00:18:35,700 --> 00:18:37,070 I'm No Cash. 836 00:18:37,067 --> 00:18:38,127 >> You're No Cash? 837 00:18:38,133 --> 00:18:39,603 (laughing) 838 00:18:39,600 --> 00:18:40,300 We're gonna need to have 839 00:18:40,300 --> 00:18:41,200 a song for the ladies. 840 00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:41,870 >> You don't need to 841 00:18:41,867 --> 00:18:42,597 sell me on that. 842 00:18:42,600 --> 00:18:43,430 >> So I'm just thinking, man, 843 00:18:43,433 --> 00:18:44,333 maybe we do like a... 844 00:18:44,333 --> 00:18:45,073 * 845 00:18:45,067 --> 00:18:46,727 >> Yeah. 846 00:18:46,733 --> 00:18:48,073 * All the girls in the world 847 00:18:48,067 --> 00:18:49,527 * Are trying to get with Teste 848 00:18:49,533 --> 00:18:51,603 * Uh yeah uh 849 00:18:51,600 --> 00:18:52,900 * All the girls in the world 850 00:18:52,900 --> 00:18:54,430 * Are trying to get with Teste 851 00:18:54,433 --> 00:18:56,233 * Uh yeah 852 00:18:56,233 --> 00:18:57,133 >> * All the girls 853 00:18:57,133 --> 00:18:57,903 * In the world 854 00:18:57,900 --> 00:18:59,430 * Are trying to get with Teste 855 00:18:59,433 --> 00:19:01,303 * He ain't got no car 856 00:19:01,300 --> 00:19:02,230 * But them sneakers 857 00:19:02,233 --> 00:19:03,133 * Can walk real far 858 00:19:03,133 --> 00:19:04,133 >> * Yeah 859 00:19:04,133 --> 00:19:05,933 >> * Calling all the ladies 860 00:19:05,933 --> 00:19:07,073 * Around the world 861 00:19:07,067 --> 00:19:07,797 >> * It's most important 862 00:19:07,800 --> 00:19:09,070 * You got to rock the Jordan 863 00:19:09,067 --> 00:19:11,097 >> * He ain't got no car 864 00:19:11,100 --> 00:19:13,070 * But he can walk real far 865 00:19:13,067 --> 00:19:13,897 >> * That's right 866 00:19:13,900 --> 00:19:15,170 >> * Talking about Teste 867 00:19:15,167 --> 00:19:16,067 >> Teste, baby. 868 00:19:16,067 --> 00:19:17,427 >> * Talking about Teste 869 00:19:17,433 --> 00:19:18,303 >> * Don't test me 870 00:19:18,300 --> 00:19:19,470 >> * If you're watching 871 00:19:19,467 --> 00:19:20,167 * This video 872 00:19:20,167 --> 00:19:23,427 * You gotta call Testes 873 00:19:23,433 --> 00:19:24,673 >> Not Testes. 874 00:19:24,667 --> 00:19:26,227 Teste. 875 00:19:26,233 --> 00:19:27,603 Don't call me Testes, dog. 876 00:19:27,600 --> 00:19:31,230 * 877 00:19:31,767 --> 00:19:32,667 - Three to the right. 878 00:19:32,767 --> 00:19:34,397 Through three. 879 00:19:34,500 --> 00:19:35,730 Big lunge 880 00:19:35,833 --> 00:19:36,733 then kick it, yo! 881 00:19:36,833 --> 00:19:38,203 Dog, check it out! Yo! 882 00:19:38,300 --> 00:19:40,200 Uh! Check it out, check it out! 883 00:19:40,300 --> 00:19:41,100 Yo! Uh! 884 00:19:41,200 --> 00:19:42,500 Cheese ball? 885 00:19:42,600 --> 00:19:43,870 - I'm good on the balls. 886 00:19:45,667 --> 00:19:47,067 [rock music] 887 00:19:47,100 --> 00:19:48,070 Cheese balls. 888 00:19:48,100 --> 00:19:49,230 - Baked potato, baked potato, 889 00:19:49,333 --> 00:19:51,673 large fries, down low, twinkle toes. 890 00:19:51,767 --> 00:19:53,267 All right. Let's go. 891 00:19:53,367 --> 00:19:55,367 You versus Brett Sellars on the tug-of-war. 892 00:19:55,467 --> 00:19:56,367 Pull! 893 00:19:56,467 --> 00:19:57,367 [yells] Oh, crap! 894 00:20:02,767 --> 00:20:03,427 >> No way. 895 00:20:03,433 --> 00:20:04,233 You are infamous 896 00:20:04,233 --> 00:20:05,003 at our household. 897 00:20:05,000 --> 00:20:06,470 Ed Bassmaster in the house. 898 00:20:06,467 --> 00:20:07,767 >> Bartle-Do. 899 00:20:07,767 --> 00:20:09,127 >> Barlte-do. 900 00:20:09,133 --> 00:20:09,873 >> Caught me off guard there, 901 00:20:09,867 --> 00:20:11,127 folks at home, but, uh, 902 00:20:11,133 --> 00:20:11,903 that was awesome, dude. 903 00:20:11,900 --> 00:20:12,700 >> Could I get a picture? 904 00:20:12,700 --> 00:20:13,870 Oh my God. 905 00:20:13,867 --> 00:20:14,827 >> Too much. 906 00:20:14,833 --> 00:20:16,033 >> This is so awesome. 907 00:20:16,033 --> 00:20:16,803 I'm gonna hug you. 908 00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:17,530 >> Oh, sorry. 909 00:20:17,533 --> 00:20:18,333 >> Could you do me a favor? 910 00:20:18,333 --> 00:20:19,233 Just once, "Would you just 911 00:20:19,233 --> 00:20:20,003 look at that dog?" 912 00:20:20,000 --> 00:20:20,730 >> Would you just look at 913 00:20:20,733 --> 00:20:21,533 that crap? 914 00:20:21,533 --> 00:20:22,503 Just look at that crap. 915 00:20:22,500 --> 00:20:23,630 What do you mean, life is crap? 916 00:20:23,633 --> 00:20:24,703 Would you get a load of him? 917 00:20:24,700 --> 00:20:26,030 Life is crap. 918 00:20:26,033 --> 00:20:27,333 It's what you make of it. 919 00:20:27,333 --> 00:20:28,473 >> Can we get a video? 920 00:20:28,467 --> 00:20:29,497 >> Oh, would you look at that? 921 00:20:29,500 --> 00:20:31,170 Mom... Mom? 922 00:20:31,167 --> 00:20:31,967 Hello, Maureen. 923 00:20:33,033 --> 00:20:34,033 * 924 00:20:34,083 --> 00:20:38,633 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0 55460

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