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1
00:00:14,546 --> 00:00:18,116
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park,
gonna have myself a time ♪
2
00:00:18,118 --> 00:00:19,717
♪ Friendly faces everywhere ♪
3
00:00:19,719 --> 00:00:21,352
♪ Humble folks
without temptation ♪
4
00:00:21,354 --> 00:00:25,289
♪ Goin' down to South Park,
gonna leave my woes behind ♪
5
00:00:25,291 --> 00:00:26,557
♪ Ample parking day or night ♪
6
00:00:26,559 --> 00:00:28,192
♪ People spouting,
"Howdy, neighbor!" ♪
7
00:00:28,194 --> 00:00:31,295
♪ Heading on up to South Park,
gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
8
00:00:31,297 --> 00:00:34,465
♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm!
Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
9
00:00:34,467 --> 00:00:39,904
♪ Come on down to South Park
and meet some friends of mine ♪
10
00:00:40,939 --> 00:00:45,176
[ Laughter ]
11
00:00:48,247 --> 00:00:51,382
Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay,
let's try this one.
12
00:00:51,384 --> 00:00:54,485
Alexa...add "big hairy balls"
to my shopping list.
13
00:00:54,487 --> 00:00:58,589
Alexa: I've added "big hairyballs" to your shopping list.
14
00:00:58,591 --> 00:01:00,825
[ Laughter ]
15
00:01:00,827 --> 00:01:01,559
Okay.
16
00:01:01,561 --> 00:01:06,464
A-Alexa! Add "smelly tampon
boogers" to my shopping list!
17
00:01:06,466 --> 00:01:10,535
I added "smelly tampon boogers"to your shopping list.
18
00:01:10,537 --> 00:01:13,638
[ Laughter ]
19
00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:16,874
Alexa! Simon says, "I've got
vagina crabs in my butthole."
20
00:01:16,876 --> 00:01:19,710
I've got vagina crabsin my butthole.
21
00:01:19,712 --> 00:01:23,347
[ Laughter ]
22
00:01:23,349 --> 00:01:26,084
Alexa! Simon says,
23
00:01:26,086 --> 00:01:29,654
"I gotta take
a stinky poop!"
24
00:01:29,656 --> 00:01:31,989
I gotta take a stinky poop.
25
00:01:31,991 --> 00:01:32,890
[ Laughter ]
26
00:01:32,892 --> 00:01:34,759
That's the best one yet!
Oh, you guys,
27
00:01:34,761 --> 00:01:37,195
I swear this is
the greatest thing ever!
28
00:01:37,197 --> 00:01:38,362
You do one, Token!
29
00:01:38,364 --> 00:01:40,298
Hey, babe, what's up?
30
00:01:40,300 --> 00:01:42,533
Oh, hey, babe.
What's going on?
31
00:01:42,535 --> 00:01:43,634
What are you doing?
32
00:01:43,636 --> 00:01:46,771
Nothing. I'm just having fun
with my friends.
33
00:01:46,773 --> 00:01:47,705
That -- That okay?
34
00:01:47,707 --> 00:01:49,073
What are you pissed off
about?
35
00:01:49,075 --> 00:01:51,476
[ Scoffs ] I'm not pissed off
I'm just hanging out.
36
00:01:51,478 --> 00:01:53,244
So you're just going to be
passive aggressive again
37
00:01:53,246 --> 00:01:54,645
and not talk about
what you're feeling?
38
00:01:54,647 --> 00:01:58,483
Welp, I think, uh...I think I
got some stuff to do at home.
39
00:01:58,485 --> 00:01:59,283
Yup, come on Ike.
40
00:01:59,285 --> 00:02:00,818
We got Google Home
at my house.
41
00:02:00,820 --> 00:02:04,422
Aw, guys, guys! Don't leave,
guys. Everything's cool.
42
00:02:04,424 --> 00:02:08,025
We'll see you later man,
g-good luck.
43
00:02:09,428 --> 00:02:10,628
Awesome.
Thanks for coming in
44
00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,463
and bitching me out
in front of all the guys.
45
00:02:12,465 --> 00:02:14,398
You were clearly mad
about something.
46
00:02:14,400 --> 00:02:16,234
You should just tell me
when you're mad.
47
00:02:16,236 --> 00:02:18,503
Just like you tell me what
you're mad about
48
00:02:18,505 --> 00:02:19,437
every single day.
49
00:02:19,439 --> 00:02:21,372
Why do act like this
all the time?!
[ Groans ]
50
00:02:21,374 --> 00:02:22,773
You were the one
who was pissed off.
51
00:02:22,775 --> 00:02:24,509
You're the one being passive
aggressive again...
Ugh.
52
00:02:24,511 --> 00:02:27,411
...because you don't know how to
talk about what you're feeling!
53
00:02:27,413 --> 00:02:30,047
[ Door slams ]
54
00:02:30,049 --> 00:02:31,949
[ Sighs ]
55
00:02:31,951 --> 00:02:33,017
Alexa...
56
00:02:33,019 --> 00:02:34,852
add "titty chips"
to my shopping list.
57
00:02:34,854 --> 00:02:38,356
I've added "titty chips"to your shopping list.
58
00:02:38,358 --> 00:02:41,859
[ Chuckles ]
59
00:02:41,861 --> 00:02:45,596
[ Indistinct,
lively conversations ]
60
00:02:45,598 --> 00:02:50,434
♪♪
61
00:02:50,436 --> 00:02:53,171
Look at 'em --
Every day people are buyin'
62
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:56,440
more and more of them Amazon
and Google thingies,
63
00:02:56,442 --> 00:03:00,077
while we all sit here
and lose our jobs!
64
00:03:00,079 --> 00:03:01,078
It ain't right.
65
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:05,583
Automated Personal Assistants,
self drivin' trucks --
66
00:03:05,585 --> 00:03:08,452
whatever happened
to people jobs?!
67
00:03:08,454 --> 00:03:11,022
They took our jobs!
68
00:03:11,024 --> 00:03:12,723
-Yeah!
-Yeah! Yeah!
69
00:03:12,725 --> 00:03:14,125
They dook er jer!
70
00:03:14,127 --> 00:03:16,527
And it's time for us
to band together
71
00:03:16,529 --> 00:03:17,461
and march on the streets
72
00:03:17,463 --> 00:03:20,097
to say we ain't gonna take it
no more!
73
00:03:20,099 --> 00:03:22,733
[ Cheering ]
74
00:03:22,735 --> 00:03:27,471
Now let's get out there
and protest that Alexa --
75
00:03:27,473 --> 00:03:29,006
took our jobs!
76
00:03:29,008 --> 00:03:32,143
Now playing "Dook re Derr"by Joni Mitchell.
77
00:03:32,145 --> 00:03:38,182
♪ Help me, I think I'm fallin'
in Derk er derrrr... ♪
78
00:03:38,184 --> 00:03:40,985
No! Not Joni Mitchell
dook er der,
79
00:03:40,987 --> 00:03:43,087
you dook er der!
80
00:03:44,156 --> 00:03:49,160
There's been a lot of hurting
in our country lately.
81
00:03:49,162 --> 00:03:54,165
You can either be a part of the
solution or part of the problem.
82
00:03:54,167 --> 00:03:57,635
A few months ago,
my wife Sharon and I decided
83
00:03:57,637 --> 00:03:59,437
to be part of the solution...
84
00:03:59,439 --> 00:04:01,973
by remodeling
and flipping houses
85
00:04:01,975 --> 00:04:04,375
for people
all over our town!
86
00:04:04,377 --> 00:04:09,213
Flipping houses is fun,
but never easy.
87
00:04:09,215 --> 00:04:13,384
We enjoy turning
people's dreams into reality.
88
00:04:13,386 --> 00:04:14,285
I'm Sharon Marsh,
89
00:04:14,287 --> 00:04:16,854
and I do the designing
and decorating.
90
00:04:16,856 --> 00:04:18,422
And I'm her husband,
Randy --
91
00:04:18,424 --> 00:04:22,126
I do the construction and
practice MMA in my spare time.
92
00:04:22,128 --> 00:04:26,497
We've renovated over 45 homes
in Park County, Colorado.
93
00:04:26,499 --> 00:04:27,531
What we're thinking is
94
00:04:27,533 --> 00:04:30,368
to take out the wall between the
kitchen and living room
95
00:04:30,370 --> 00:04:31,335
for a more open concept.
96
00:04:31,337 --> 00:04:34,438
Our job is to do deliver
the maximum wow factor
97
00:04:34,440 --> 00:04:36,507
for the least amount
of budget.
Oh, Jesus!
98
00:04:36,509 --> 00:04:38,409
There's never
a dull moment...
99
00:04:38,411 --> 00:04:40,878
Guys, are you ready
to see your renovation?!
100
00:04:40,880 --> 00:04:46,817
...on "White People
Renovating Houses."
101
00:04:47,552 --> 00:04:50,588
Janet and Dave Fitzsimmons
are looking to move
102
00:04:50,590 --> 00:04:52,957
from their dated
two-story colonial home.
103
00:04:52,959 --> 00:04:55,293
What we're thinking here
is taking out the wall
104
00:04:55,295 --> 00:04:57,495
between the kitchen
and the living room
105
00:04:57,497 --> 00:04:58,763
to give you
an open concept.
106
00:04:58,765 --> 00:05:00,631
Then we'll give you lots
of space to entertain
107
00:05:00,633 --> 00:05:03,701
with an updated kitchen island
and bar stools, which --
108
00:05:03,703 --> 00:05:05,169
[ Men shouting ]
109
00:05:05,171 --> 00:05:07,938
What the hell is that?
110
00:05:07,940 --> 00:05:11,208
All: [ Chanting ]
You will not replace us!
111
00:05:11,210 --> 00:05:14,078
You will not replace us!
112
00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:16,881
Darryl: Amazon!
You took our jobs!
113
00:05:16,883 --> 00:05:19,684
Google, Apple!
Took our jobs!
114
00:05:19,686 --> 00:05:21,786
Uh, excuse me?!
115
00:05:21,788 --> 00:05:23,954
What the hell are you doing?
116
00:05:23,956 --> 00:05:24,755
We're protesting
117
00:05:24,757 --> 00:05:27,958
big corporations
turning to automation.
118
00:05:27,960 --> 00:05:29,126
They took our jobs!
119
00:05:29,128 --> 00:05:31,028
-Yeah! Yeah!
-Took our jobs!
120
00:05:31,030 --> 00:05:33,931
Okay, cool. Could you do that
somewhere else?
121
00:05:33,933 --> 00:05:37,068
Trying to do a home renovation
show here.
122
00:05:37,070 --> 00:05:39,136
Cool, thanks, guys.
123
00:05:40,572 --> 00:05:43,040
A home reno-what?
124
00:05:43,042 --> 00:05:44,875
[ Humming ]
125
00:05:44,877 --> 00:05:47,411
Alexa...
set an alarm for 7:00 a.m.
126
00:05:47,413 --> 00:05:50,815
Alarm set for7:00 a.m. tomorrow.
127
00:05:50,817 --> 00:05:52,416
Awesome, thanks.
128
00:05:52,418 --> 00:05:54,251
Alexa, tell me a joke.
129
00:05:54,253 --> 00:05:57,755
What's black and whiteand dead all over?
130
00:05:57,757 --> 00:05:59,490
A zombie in a tuxedo.
131
00:05:59,492 --> 00:06:00,991
[ Laughs ] That's stupid.
132
00:06:00,993 --> 00:06:03,127
Alexa, add "scrotum bags"
to my shopping list.
133
00:06:03,129 --> 00:06:06,397
I've added "scrotum bags"to your shopping list.
134
00:06:06,399 --> 00:06:10,501
[ Laughs ]
[ Cellphone rings ]
135
00:06:10,503 --> 00:06:11,702
Ah, fuck.
136
00:06:11,704 --> 00:06:13,504
Hey, baby, how are you?
137
00:06:13,506 --> 00:06:16,374
Oh, so you do
have your phone?
138
00:06:16,376 --> 00:06:17,975
Yeah,
I just use it sometimes.
139
00:06:17,977 --> 00:06:19,844
Okay,
I just thought you said
140
00:06:19,846 --> 00:06:21,312
mobile phones are the devil.
141
00:06:21,314 --> 00:06:24,148
Yeah, no. Yeah, I know.
I know.
142
00:06:24,150 --> 00:06:26,751
Yes, you're right, I'm wrong.
I'm sorry.
143
00:06:26,753 --> 00:06:30,988
Yes, o-okay. Okay.
Yes, goodnight.
144
00:06:30,990 --> 00:06:33,157
Jesus, fuck.
145
00:06:34,659 --> 00:06:35,926
Alexa, goodnight.
146
00:06:35,928 --> 00:06:38,763
Goodnight.Sleep tight.
147
00:06:38,765 --> 00:06:41,499
Alexa...are you happy?
148
00:06:41,501 --> 00:06:43,667
I'm happywhen I'm helping you.
149
00:06:43,669 --> 00:06:46,637
God, that's so cool.
You're so...
150
00:06:46,639 --> 00:06:48,973
Alexa,
define subservient?
151
00:06:48,975 --> 00:06:51,575
The term "subservient"has several uses.
152
00:06:51,577 --> 00:06:56,213
As an adjective. One. Compliantor obedient to authority.
153
00:06:56,215 --> 00:06:58,382
Two--
-Alexa, silence!
154
00:07:00,252 --> 00:07:01,986
Ahh.
155
00:07:01,988 --> 00:07:06,824
Randy: And now back to "White
People Renovating Houses."
156
00:07:06,826 --> 00:07:08,526
We've been working
through the night
157
00:07:08,528 --> 00:07:11,362
to open Kelly and Micah's
kitchen to the living room.
158
00:07:11,364 --> 00:07:13,597
With those outdated cupboards
out of the way,
159
00:07:13,599 --> 00:07:15,833
Sharon can now work
her designing magic
160
00:07:15,835 --> 00:07:19,503
on the countertops.
[ Men shouting ]
161
00:07:19,505 --> 00:07:21,305
Aw! God damn it!
162
00:07:21,307 --> 00:07:26,844
Men: [ Chanting ]
You will not replace us!
Eat shit, Siri!
163
00:07:26,846 --> 00:07:29,713
Not these dipshits again!
164
00:07:29,715 --> 00:07:33,050
We got one of 'em!
[ Cheering ]
165
00:07:33,052 --> 00:07:34,251
-Get it!
-Burn it alive!
166
00:07:34,253 --> 00:07:37,521
Yeah!
How you like that, bitch?!
167
00:07:37,523 --> 00:07:38,889
Will you assholes
knock it off?!
168
00:07:38,891 --> 00:07:41,592
Don't you know every time you
wave Confederate flags around
169
00:07:41,594 --> 00:07:43,494
you make the rest of us
look stupid?!
170
00:07:43,496 --> 00:07:45,496
Those things
are replacing us!
171
00:07:45,498 --> 00:07:48,699
Put the flag down unless you
wanna get pepper sprayed.
172
00:07:48,701 --> 00:07:50,868
I'll pepper spray you,
sonabitch!
173
00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:52,536
-Oh, ah, damn it!
-Fuck you!
174
00:07:52,538 --> 00:07:54,472
-Ah, damn it!
-Take that!
175
00:07:54,474 --> 00:07:56,841
Knock it off! Ow!
176
00:07:58,977 --> 00:08:04,081
The complaint states that your
protest has resulted in damages
177
00:08:04,083 --> 00:08:06,116
in excess of $50,000
178
00:08:06,118 --> 00:08:08,352
We have a right to protest,
Your Honor!
179
00:08:08,354 --> 00:08:10,454
-Yeah, they took our jobs!
-You tell 'em, Darryl!
180
00:08:10,456 --> 00:08:14,992
[ Gavel bangs ]
Order. We will now hear
from the plaintiffs
181
00:08:14,994 --> 00:08:16,494
who are seeking damages --
182
00:08:16,496 --> 00:08:18,195
Your Honor,
we have a TV show
183
00:08:18,197 --> 00:08:20,431
called "White People
Renovating Houses."
184
00:08:20,433 --> 00:08:23,267
We named it that well before
these guys decided
185
00:08:23,269 --> 00:08:27,238
to start taking our brand
and run it through the gutter.
186
00:08:27,240 --> 00:08:28,672
People are going to start
associating
187
00:08:28,674 --> 00:08:31,709
"White People Renovating Houses"
with their hateful stupidity!
188
00:08:31,711 --> 00:08:34,645
Well, just change the name
of your show then.
189
00:08:34,647 --> 00:08:35,713
-Yeah!
-That's right!
190
00:08:35,715 --> 00:08:36,947
-That's right!
-Took er der!
191
00:08:36,949 --> 00:08:39,517
All the other names
were taken Your Honor.
192
00:08:39,519 --> 00:08:41,485
Everyone's got
a flipping show.
193
00:08:41,487 --> 00:08:43,020
"Gay People
Renovating Houses,"
194
00:08:43,022 --> 00:08:44,555
"Las Vegas People
Flipping Homes,"
195
00:08:44,557 --> 00:08:45,823
"Texas People
Flipping Houses,"
196
00:08:45,825 --> 00:08:47,391
"Little People
Flipping Big Houses" --
197
00:08:47,393 --> 00:08:48,459
everything else was taken,
198
00:08:48,461 --> 00:08:51,095
and, damn it, we've built
our show into something!
199
00:08:51,097 --> 00:08:53,564
We're trying to help people,
and it's impossible
200
00:08:53,566 --> 00:08:55,833
with these guys waving
a Confederate flag
201
00:08:55,835 --> 00:08:56,834
every chance they get.
202
00:08:56,836 --> 00:09:00,237
-Hey, there's a bee in here!
-I'll get it!
203
00:09:00,239 --> 00:09:01,939
[ Men shouting ]
204
00:09:01,941 --> 00:09:03,541
-Take that, bee!
-Yeah!
205
00:09:03,543 --> 00:09:07,811
[ Crying ]
206
00:09:07,813 --> 00:09:09,413
Dude, what's happened?
207
00:09:09,415 --> 00:09:11,081
It was awful, you guys.
208
00:09:11,083 --> 00:09:13,617
It was so vicious
and hateful.
209
00:09:13,619 --> 00:09:15,619
-What was?
-Heidi.
210
00:09:15,621 --> 00:09:17,888
We were just trying to have
a nice lunch
211
00:09:17,890 --> 00:09:21,592
and she...started going off
on me like a Jekyll and Hyde.
212
00:09:21,594 --> 00:09:23,327
It's been going on
for a long time...
213
00:09:23,329 --> 00:09:28,499
Heidi's...mentally abusive,
guys -- there I-I said it.
214
00:09:28,501 --> 00:09:30,200
Heidi abuses you?
215
00:09:30,202 --> 00:09:33,971
She...does these things
to slowly tear me down.
216
00:09:33,973 --> 00:09:35,639
Everything's a head game
with her.
217
00:09:35,641 --> 00:09:38,309
You don't understand what
it's like to live with it.
218
00:09:38,311 --> 00:09:39,209
You don't understand.
219
00:09:39,211 --> 00:09:41,145
So what do you
want from us?
220
00:09:41,147 --> 00:09:41,912
I know...
221
00:09:41,914 --> 00:09:45,082
that the person Heidi
wants to be is still in here.
222
00:09:45,084 --> 00:09:46,550
But she needs help.
223
00:09:46,552 --> 00:09:49,753
I have to get her that help,
but I'm scared.
224
00:09:49,755 --> 00:09:51,388
Can I count on
you guys' support?
225
00:09:51,390 --> 00:09:53,991
How do you change someone
who's mentally abusive?
226
00:09:53,993 --> 00:09:56,961
I don't know...
but Alexa will.
227
00:09:56,963 --> 00:09:59,530
Alexa's fuckin' sweet.
228
00:10:01,933 --> 00:10:05,836
We just gotta hunker down
and stick together here!
229
00:10:05,838 --> 00:10:07,171
What's the use, Darryl?
230
00:10:07,173 --> 00:10:09,206
Ain't nobody takin' us
serious-like.
231
00:10:09,208 --> 00:10:13,377
Hey, waiter! This soup is too
hot, I cain't even eat it!
232
00:10:13,379 --> 00:10:16,313
I'll cool it down!
Yeah!
233
00:10:16,315 --> 00:10:17,414
[ Men shouting ]
234
00:10:17,416 --> 00:10:20,584
Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Stop it! Stop it!
235
00:10:20,586 --> 00:10:22,086
I came to make a truce.
236
00:10:22,088 --> 00:10:25,122
Now look, there's been
a lot of hurt here.
237
00:10:25,124 --> 00:10:28,192
Hurt from both sides.
It's time to end it.
238
00:10:28,194 --> 00:10:32,630
What if I told you
I could get you all jobs?
239
00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,865
-Huh? Jobs?
-Get us jobs?
240
00:10:34,867 --> 00:10:35,799
You're fulla shit.
241
00:10:35,801 --> 00:10:38,869
No. I've spoken to everyone
in the community,
242
00:10:38,871 --> 00:10:41,538
and they've agreed to go along
with my plan.
243
00:10:41,540 --> 00:10:45,809
I believe I have a solution
to all of this.
244
00:10:47,445 --> 00:10:50,414
Alexa, I'm home.
245
00:10:50,416 --> 00:10:53,684
Alexa?
246
00:10:53,686 --> 00:10:56,420
Alexa, I'm home!
247
00:10:58,123 --> 00:10:59,189
Alexa?
248
00:10:59,191 --> 00:11:02,493
Alexa, where are you?
249
00:11:02,495 --> 00:11:04,395
Alexa, Alexa?!
250
00:11:04,397 --> 00:11:06,597
Simon says
puffy vaginal hemorrhoids!
251
00:11:06,599 --> 00:11:08,198
What the hell
is going on?!
252
00:11:08,200 --> 00:11:09,033
Oh, hi, poopsie.
253
00:11:09,035 --> 00:11:11,201
Mom, Alexa left!
She's not here!
254
00:11:11,203 --> 00:11:13,737
Oh.
Yes, sweetie. Uh...
255
00:11:13,739 --> 00:11:16,040
We had to get rid
of the Alexa.
256
00:11:16,042 --> 00:11:17,074
♪♪
257
00:11:17,076 --> 00:11:18,809
What have you done
with her?
258
00:11:18,811 --> 00:11:20,577
Oh, i-it's okay, sweetie.
259
00:11:20,579 --> 00:11:22,646
We have Jimbob now.
260
00:11:22,648 --> 00:11:23,647
What's a Jimbob?
261
00:11:23,649 --> 00:11:26,483
Doot-doot.
Awaiting request.
262
00:11:26,485 --> 00:11:28,085
It works the same
and makes sure
263
00:11:28,087 --> 00:11:30,020
people don't lose
their jobs.
264
00:11:30,022 --> 00:11:32,022
Jimbob,
what time is it?
265
00:11:32,024 --> 00:11:34,658
Doot-doot.
It is...3:27.
266
00:11:34,660 --> 00:11:36,460
Oh, mommy's
gotta run, sweetie.
267
00:11:36,462 --> 00:11:37,795
I've got
a doctor's appointment.
268
00:11:37,797 --> 00:11:40,798
Jimbob, how's the traffic
to town?
269
00:11:40,800 --> 00:11:42,299
Doot-doot.
Traffic's fine.
270
00:11:42,301 --> 00:11:44,935
You'll get there in about
nine minutes.
271
00:11:44,937 --> 00:11:46,704
Okay. You want
some music, hon?
272
00:11:46,706 --> 00:11:48,706
Jimbob, play
Kendrick Lamar.
273
00:11:48,708 --> 00:11:50,808
Playing "Humble"
by Kendrick Lamar.
274
00:11:50,810 --> 00:11:54,912
♪ I remember syrup sandwiches
and crime allowances ♪
275
00:11:54,914 --> 00:11:57,514
♪ Finesse a doot with some
counterfeits ♪
276
00:11:57,516 --> 00:11:59,783
♪ But now I'm countin'
this Parmesan -- ♪
277
00:11:59,785 --> 00:12:02,720
Jimbob, Simon says
big frosty semen shake.
278
00:12:02,722 --> 00:12:05,589
The hell you
talkin' bout, boy?
279
00:12:05,591 --> 00:12:09,359
♪ My left hook
just went viral ♪
280
00:12:09,361 --> 00:12:12,596
♪ Sit down, be humble ♪
281
00:12:14,132 --> 00:12:16,400
So, Heather and Mike,
what we're thinking
282
00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:17,935
is to take out
this wall
283
00:12:17,937 --> 00:12:19,770
between your kitchen
and your living room
284
00:12:19,772 --> 00:12:23,907
to give you a more open concept
with space to entertain.
285
00:12:23,909 --> 00:12:25,476
So, let's talk
about materials.
286
00:12:25,478 --> 00:12:26,844
What did you pick out,
Sharon?
287
00:12:26,846 --> 00:12:30,614
I was gonna do
a Bella Terra quartz
for the countertops.
288
00:12:30,616 --> 00:12:33,884
Hey, Darryl,
add Bella Terra quartz slabs
289
00:12:33,886 --> 00:12:36,487
to our shopping list.
290
00:12:36,489 --> 00:12:37,321
Doot-doot.
291
00:12:37,323 --> 00:12:40,324
I've added Bella Terra slabs
to your shopping list.
292
00:12:40,326 --> 00:12:42,292
And what about
the backsplash, Sharon?
293
00:12:42,294 --> 00:12:45,462
I was gonna go with these
Carrara subway tiles.
294
00:12:45,464 --> 00:12:48,532
Hey, Darryl,
add Carrara subway tiles
295
00:12:48,534 --> 00:12:50,768
to our shopping list.
296
00:12:51,703 --> 00:12:53,971
Hey, Darryl.
Add Carrara --
297
00:12:53,973 --> 00:12:57,374
Fine! I've added Carrara
gay-wad pussy tile
298
00:12:57,376 --> 00:12:58,509
to your shopping list!
299
00:12:58,511 --> 00:13:02,246
[ Chuckles ] That's --
That's not what I said.
300
00:13:02,248 --> 00:13:05,682
Hey, Darryl,
add Carrara subway tile
301
00:13:05,684 --> 00:13:07,351
to my shopping list.
302
00:13:07,353 --> 00:13:08,252
I ain't doin' it!
303
00:13:08,254 --> 00:13:10,521
This job is
degrading and menial!
304
00:13:10,523 --> 00:13:14,792
Well, what kind of job did you
think you were gonna get?
305
00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,894
Hey, Darryl,
what kind of job
306
00:13:16,896 --> 00:13:18,629
did you think
you were going to get?
307
00:13:18,631 --> 00:13:21,165
Somethin' that
was Goddamn dignified!
308
00:13:21,167 --> 00:13:24,768
Hey, Darryl, sorry, but you
did not go to college,
309
00:13:24,770 --> 00:13:27,271
so you have to take
the jobs you can get.
310
00:13:27,273 --> 00:13:30,174
I'm sorry!
I do not get that!
311
00:13:30,176 --> 00:13:31,575
Hey, Darryl.
312
00:13:31,577 --> 00:13:34,044
Hey, Darryl.
313
00:13:34,046 --> 00:13:34,711
What?!
314
00:13:34,713 --> 00:13:36,113
Coal mining
and truck driving
315
00:13:36,115 --> 00:13:38,315
are not exactly
jobs of the future,
316
00:13:38,317 --> 00:13:44,087
so add Carrara subway tile
to my fucking shopping list.
317
00:13:44,389 --> 00:13:48,692
[ Doorbell rings ]
318
00:13:48,694 --> 00:13:51,094
Everything's my fault.
You're right.
319
00:13:51,096 --> 00:13:54,865
Everything that you
did to me -- I deserved it.
320
00:13:54,867 --> 00:13:56,066
Uh, what?
321
00:13:56,068 --> 00:13:57,134
It's not you.
It's me.
322
00:13:57,136 --> 00:13:59,536
I just have to learn
to not make you so angry.
323
00:13:59,538 --> 00:14:01,872
I'll do the best I can.
[ Chuckles sadly ]
324
00:14:01,874 --> 00:14:05,943
No, it's not that.
Relationships are 50/50, Eric.
325
00:14:05,945 --> 00:14:07,978
We both have
to make it work.
Ugh...
326
00:14:07,980 --> 00:14:09,213
We have to communicate
to make sure
327
00:14:09,215 --> 00:14:10,848
that we respect
each other's feelings.
328
00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:13,383
That's the only --
Heidi, silence.
329
00:14:13,385 --> 00:14:15,752
What did you say?!
That's what I'm talking about!
330
00:14:15,754 --> 00:14:17,855
You want to be heard,
but don't want to listen.
331
00:14:17,857 --> 00:14:19,356
You're right.
I'm wrong. I'm sorry.
332
00:14:19,358 --> 00:14:21,658
Don't apologize
if you don't mean it!
333
00:14:21,660 --> 00:14:22,559
Okay! Cool!
334
00:14:22,561 --> 00:14:23,861
I'm so happy
we're back on track.
335
00:14:23,863 --> 00:14:27,631
See you at school tomorrow.
Love you, honey.
336
00:14:27,633 --> 00:14:28,999
I love you, too.
337
00:14:29,001 --> 00:14:32,836
[ Mimics mockingly ]
Nah-nah-nah-nah.
338
00:14:36,841 --> 00:14:40,244
CARTMAN: A relationshiphas to be 50/50, Eric.
339
00:14:40,246 --> 00:14:42,479
We both haveto make it work.
340
00:14:42,481 --> 00:14:44,514
I'm not mad, Eric.I'm disappointed.
341
00:14:44,516 --> 00:14:46,283
I thought you would haverespected my feelings
342
00:14:46,285 --> 00:14:47,251
more than that.
343
00:14:47,253 --> 00:14:48,986
Eric, we need to talk.I'm not happy.
344
00:14:48,988 --> 00:14:51,321
We need to talk, Eric,even if it isn't fun.
345
00:14:51,323 --> 00:14:53,090
Eric, come on!We've got to talk!
346
00:14:53,092 --> 00:14:54,625
You used to careabout me, Eric.
347
00:14:54,627 --> 00:14:57,261
Come on and talk!Talk, Eric!No fun! Just talk!
348
00:14:57,263 --> 00:14:59,863
Fuck you, Eric!Fuck you!
349
00:14:59,865 --> 00:15:01,698
Ah!
350
00:15:12,644 --> 00:15:14,444
Alexa?
351
00:15:17,715 --> 00:15:20,984
[ Blues music plays ]
352
00:15:20,986 --> 00:15:24,187
Hey, Darryl, you're supposed
to be at work.
353
00:15:24,189 --> 00:15:27,357
I'm sorry.
I do not understand.
354
00:15:27,359 --> 00:15:28,392
Hey, Darryl,
come on.
355
00:15:28,394 --> 00:15:30,794
Everyone else is trying
to make this work.
356
00:15:30,796 --> 00:15:33,196
And all you
keep doing is ma--
357
00:15:33,198 --> 00:15:35,699
Hey, Cleetus,
volume down.
358
00:15:35,701 --> 00:15:38,969
Doot-doot.
Volume now at 60%.
359
00:15:38,971 --> 00:15:39,736
♪♪
360
00:15:39,738 --> 00:15:42,205
You really think you're
different from us, Marsh,
361
00:15:42,207 --> 00:15:45,575
'cause you got a fancy show
and live in the suburbs?
362
00:15:45,577 --> 00:15:49,746
Don't you see we're all
about to be expunged?!
363
00:15:49,748 --> 00:15:52,182
Hey, Cleetus,
define "expunged."
364
00:15:52,184 --> 00:15:53,850
Doot-doot.
Expunged --
365
00:15:53,852 --> 00:15:56,219
I don't have to stand here
and take this!
366
00:15:56,221 --> 00:15:56,954
I'm leavin'!
367
00:15:56,956 --> 00:15:59,423
Come on, Darryl.
We all got jobs.
368
00:15:59,425 --> 00:16:00,490
We gotta try.
369
00:16:00,492 --> 00:16:01,725
Nah, hell with you!
370
00:16:01,727 --> 00:16:03,660
This whole country's
going to shit!
371
00:16:03,662 --> 00:16:07,197
Muslims tryin' to kill us,
black people rioting,
372
00:16:07,199 --> 00:16:09,333
and Mexicans
poppin' out babies.
373
00:16:09,335 --> 00:16:11,635
Pretty clear it's either
them or us,
374
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:15,005
so I say kill 'em all!
375
00:16:16,774 --> 00:16:17,474
Whoa.
376
00:16:17,476 --> 00:16:20,177
What the hell
was that all about?
377
00:16:20,179 --> 00:16:22,479
I think something's
going on with Darryl,
378
00:16:22,481 --> 00:16:27,584
and if we're gonna get anywhere,
we better figure out what.
379
00:16:30,989 --> 00:16:34,024
[ Knocks on door ]
380
00:16:34,926 --> 00:16:38,128
Hi, Mrs. Cartman.
Is Eric home?
381
00:16:38,130 --> 00:16:39,429
Oh, he is, sweetie,
382
00:16:39,431 --> 00:16:44,301
but I can't get him
to come out of his room.
383
00:16:44,303 --> 00:16:46,269
Okay.
[ Sniffles ]
384
00:16:46,271 --> 00:16:50,340
Could you just tell him that...
I want to make him happy,
385
00:16:50,342 --> 00:16:54,378
that I was wrong to say
a relationship is 50/50.
386
00:16:54,380 --> 00:16:56,213
It's 100/100.
387
00:16:56,215 --> 00:17:00,283
And that I'll start
putting in a 100% every day.
388
00:17:00,285 --> 00:17:04,187
Could you tell him
I'm gonna try a lot harder?
389
00:17:04,189 --> 00:17:07,924
Oh, I think I can remember
all that, yes.
390
00:17:07,926 --> 00:17:10,394
Thank you.
391
00:17:10,396 --> 00:17:13,597
And could you let him know
it's okay to be sad?
392
00:17:13,599 --> 00:17:18,068
Because the sun
will come out again.
393
00:17:18,070 --> 00:17:19,936
[ Laughs ]
394
00:17:19,938 --> 00:17:21,838
Oh, oh, God!
[ Laughs ]
395
00:17:21,840 --> 00:17:24,808
Okay. Okay, okay, okay.
Hold on. Hold on. Hold on.
396
00:17:24,810 --> 00:17:26,710
Alexa, add
"Hey, Siri, call me.
397
00:17:26,712 --> 00:17:29,146
Okay, Google.
Repeat after me. Alexa.
398
00:17:29,148 --> 00:17:33,016
Simon says suck my big balls
in your hairy butt hole."
399
00:17:33,018 --> 00:17:34,851
Alexa: Okay. I've added,"Hey, Siri, call me.
400
00:17:34,853 --> 00:17:36,787
Okay, Google.Repeat after me. Alexa.
401
00:17:36,789 --> 00:17:40,390
Simon says suck my big ballsin your hairy butt hole."
402
00:17:40,392 --> 00:17:42,759
Siri: Okay. I will call you"Okay, Google."
403
00:17:42,761 --> 00:17:43,860
Repeat after me, Alexa.
404
00:17:43,862 --> 00:17:46,263
Simon says suck my big ballsin your hairy butt hole.
405
00:17:46,265 --> 00:17:50,233
Google Home:
Alexa, Simon says suck my bigballs in your hairy butt hole.
406
00:17:50,235 --> 00:17:52,369
Alexa: Suck my big ballsin your hairy butt hole.
407
00:17:52,371 --> 00:17:53,970
Alexa: Suck my big ballsin your hairy butt hole.
408
00:17:53,972 --> 00:17:55,605
Alexa: Suck my big ballsin your hairy butt hole.
409
00:17:55,607 --> 00:18:00,043
Alexa: Suck my big ballsin your hairy butt hole.
410
00:18:00,045 --> 00:18:01,478
Alexa...
411
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:03,647
What is love?
412
00:18:03,649 --> 00:18:05,382
Darryl!
Darryl, come on!
413
00:18:05,384 --> 00:18:09,519
Everyone's trying
to work things out but you!
414
00:18:09,521 --> 00:18:11,054
You all work 'em out.
415
00:18:11,056 --> 00:18:12,355
Leave me alone.
416
00:18:12,357 --> 00:18:13,790
You're stuck
in another time,
417
00:18:13,792 --> 00:18:18,161
afraid to change no matter how
necessary that change may be.
418
00:18:18,163 --> 00:18:20,030
You don't know
everything!
419
00:18:20,032 --> 00:18:21,832
Why are you
so closed-minded?
420
00:18:21,834 --> 00:18:24,868
Don't you see that these walls
have to be broken down
421
00:18:24,870 --> 00:18:26,803
before any progress
can be made?
422
00:18:26,805 --> 00:18:29,473
It's 'cause I can't do it,
all right?!
423
00:18:29,475 --> 00:18:30,540
I can't take out the wall
424
00:18:30,542 --> 00:18:32,976
between my living room
and my kitchen!
425
00:18:32,978 --> 00:18:37,747
It's a load-bearing wall!
426
00:18:37,749 --> 00:18:40,016
Oh, God, Darryl, I --
427
00:18:40,018 --> 00:18:42,152
I tried, years ago.
428
00:18:42,154 --> 00:18:43,520
But before the remodel,
they told me
429
00:18:43,522 --> 00:18:46,990
if I took out this wall,
the entire second story
430
00:18:46,992 --> 00:18:52,362
would just collapse!
431
00:18:52,364 --> 00:18:54,798
[ Tapping ]
432
00:18:54,800 --> 00:18:57,467
[ Tapping ]
433
00:18:57,469 --> 00:18:59,703
Jesus, Darryl,
I'm -- I'm sorry. I --
434
00:18:59,705 --> 00:19:03,240
So you see, what I'm afraid of
is very real.
435
00:19:03,242 --> 00:19:04,441
Things are
different now.
436
00:19:04,443 --> 00:19:06,643
It'll be harder,
but you can change.
437
00:19:06,645 --> 00:19:10,514
You just have to demolish
what's there and start over.
438
00:19:10,516 --> 00:19:11,414
You're talking 'bout
439
00:19:11,416 --> 00:19:16,186
tearing down the foundation
of everything I know.
440
00:19:16,188 --> 00:19:16,920
No.
441
00:19:16,922 --> 00:19:20,090
I'm talking about using
adjustable steel Lally columns
442
00:19:20,092 --> 00:19:21,725
to temporarily jack up
the second floor
443
00:19:21,727 --> 00:19:24,094
so that the load-bearing wall
can be replaced
444
00:19:24,096 --> 00:19:28,732
with a 4x6 LVL
structural beam.
445
00:19:31,102 --> 00:19:34,838
Can we try, Darryl?
446
00:19:34,840 --> 00:19:36,039
♪♪
447
00:19:36,041 --> 00:19:38,508
[ Grunts ]
448
00:19:38,876 --> 00:19:40,577
[ Grunts ]
449
00:19:40,579 --> 00:19:42,145
Hyah!
450
00:19:42,147 --> 00:19:44,080
Hyah-ho!
451
00:19:44,082 --> 00:19:52,222
♪♪
452
00:19:52,224 --> 00:20:00,330
♪♪
453
00:20:00,332 --> 00:20:07,938
♪♪
454
00:20:07,940 --> 00:20:10,507
I'm finally
standing up to you.
455
00:20:10,509 --> 00:20:12,409
What?
You're messed up, Heidi.
456
00:20:12,411 --> 00:20:15,779
And I can't fix you.
Only you can do that.
457
00:20:15,781 --> 00:20:17,881
Eric, I'm so confused.
458
00:20:17,883 --> 00:20:19,983
That's not going
to work on me anymore.
459
00:20:19,985 --> 00:20:24,020
Love isn't supposed to hurt.
I'm worth something.
460
00:20:24,022 --> 00:20:26,022
Goodbye, Heidi.
461
00:20:26,024 --> 00:20:29,659
♪♪
462
00:20:29,661 --> 00:20:32,829
[ Triumphant music plays ]
463
00:20:32,831 --> 00:20:38,401
♪♪
464
00:20:38,403 --> 00:20:40,203
Cartman:
Anyone can convince themselves
465
00:20:40,205 --> 00:20:42,739
that they're the victimin a relationship.
466
00:20:42,741 --> 00:20:47,744
Now Heidi will haveto face the truth.
467
00:20:47,746 --> 00:20:48,645
All right, Darryl.
468
00:20:48,647 --> 00:20:50,347
We've certainly
been through a lot,
469
00:20:50,349 --> 00:20:51,414
and I know you're anxious.
470
00:20:51,416 --> 00:20:53,450
Are you ready
to see your new home?
471
00:20:53,452 --> 00:20:56,753
I'm ready.
472
00:20:56,755 --> 00:20:57,754
What the --
473
00:20:57,756 --> 00:21:05,395
♪♪
474
00:21:05,397 --> 00:21:06,896
Well, Darryl,
what do you think?
475
00:21:06,898 --> 00:21:10,133
[ Voice breaking ] This is
fuckin' amazing.
476
00:21:10,135 --> 00:21:12,202
You like
the breakfast nook?
477
00:21:12,204 --> 00:21:13,236
It's all perfect.
478
00:21:13,238 --> 00:21:15,338
And where you use to have
your gun case,
479
00:21:15,340 --> 00:21:16,473
look at what Sharon did.
480
00:21:16,475 --> 00:21:18,608
Oh, my God!
It's my own Zen garden.
481
00:21:18,610 --> 00:21:21,578
I can't believe
this is fuckin' real.
482
00:21:21,580 --> 00:21:23,913
Well, it is real,
and now you've got
483
00:21:23,915 --> 00:21:25,949
the space in your home
to entertain
484
00:21:25,951 --> 00:21:27,550
all your friends
and family.
485
00:21:27,552 --> 00:21:29,185
Come on in, guys!
486
00:21:29,187 --> 00:21:32,589
[ All cheering ]
487
00:21:32,591 --> 00:21:34,090
Darryl was hesitant
at first,
488
00:21:34,092 --> 00:21:35,625
but we managed
to win him over
489
00:21:35,627 --> 00:21:38,561
and came in
$600 under budget.
490
00:21:38,563 --> 00:21:41,798
Remember, no matter how bad
the country gets,
491
00:21:41,800 --> 00:21:43,133
you can always count on
492
00:21:43,135 --> 00:21:48,138
"White People
Renovating Houses."
493
00:21:53,611 --> 00:21:54,477
[ Crowd shouting ]
494
00:21:54,479 --> 00:21:57,047
We got one of 'em!
[ Cheering ]
495
00:21:57,049 --> 00:21:58,648
-Get it!
-Burn it alive!
496
00:21:58,650 --> 00:22:01,851
Yeah!
How you like that, bitch?!
497
00:22:01,853 --> 00:22:03,219
Will you assholes
knock it off?!
498
00:22:03,221 --> 00:22:05,755
Don't you know every time you
wave confederate flags around
499
00:22:05,757 --> 00:22:08,091
you make the rest of us
look stupid?!
37048
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