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1
00:00:06,507 --> 00:00:08,048
You're hearing AFC Richmond
2
00:00:08,050 --> 00:00:10,258
being booed lustily by their home fans,
3
00:00:10,260 --> 00:00:13,970
and you have to say,
not without good reason.
4
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:15,812
2-0. We're better than that!
5
00:00:16,683 --> 00:00:20,193
Jamie. Jamie. Sorry, I didn't put
that cross where you wanted it.
6
00:00:21,104 --> 00:00:22,187
Ah. Forget it, mate.
7
00:00:22,189 --> 00:00:24,773
Hey, would it be too forward
if I gave you some advice
8
00:00:24,775 --> 00:00:26,816
that might help improve your game a bit?
9
00:00:26,818 --> 00:00:27,901
No. Please, anything.
10
00:00:27,903 --> 00:00:30,050
What you need to do is
get yourself a time machine,
11
00:00:30,052 --> 00:00:31,363
and go back to the moment
12
00:00:31,365 --> 00:00:32,761
when your mom was about to fuck
13
00:00:32,763 --> 00:00:34,775
a sad little man with
no athletic talent.
14
00:00:34,777 --> 00:00:37,182
Pull her off him, fly her to Argentina,
15
00:00:37,184 --> 00:00:39,447
and drop her onto Maradona's cock.
16
00:00:41,124 --> 00:00:42,334
Hope that helps, mate.
17
00:00:43,252 --> 00:00:45,210
Right, that's it.
18
00:00:45,212 --> 00:00:47,587
I'm done with you being
a prick to everyone.
19
00:00:47,589 --> 00:00:48,839
Ooh.
20
00:00:48,841 --> 00:00:53,511
So, either I beat up an old man,
or I let an old man beat me up.
21
00:00:56,557 --> 00:00:58,014
Fuck it. Let's go.
22
00:00:58,016 --> 00:01:00,183
Fucking...
23
00:01:00,185 --> 00:01:03,645
Hey, hey, hey!
24
00:01:03,647 --> 00:01:05,355
Easy, easy, easy now!
25
00:01:05,357 --> 00:01:07,440
Coach, tell these boys what the
first rule of my fight club is.
26
00:01:07,442 --> 00:01:10,927
- No fight club!
- No fight club. Okay? You understand?
27
00:01:10,929 --> 00:01:12,426
For the love of Pistol Pete, y'all.
28
00:01:12,428 --> 00:01:14,281
We still got a second half to play.
29
00:01:14,283 --> 00:01:16,123
Now, please, sit down. Everybody.
30
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:20,079
Gaffer saved you, old man.
31
00:01:24,209 --> 00:01:25,589
Call me old...
32
00:01:26,879 --> 00:01:27,961
one more time.
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00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:33,050
Sorry...
34
00:01:34,678 --> 00:01:35,969
granddad.
35
00:01:35,971 --> 00:01:38,680
I'll fucking kill you!
36
00:01:40,774 --> 00:01:43,774
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
37
00:02:00,871 --> 00:02:03,188
Table four is done
38
00:02:03,190 --> 00:02:06,958
and shall from now on be
known as the boring table.
39
00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:08,876
But that's where I'm sitting.
40
00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:09,961
Oh.
41
00:02:09,963 --> 00:02:13,840
Ugh. I haven't placed
Elaine Kenner. Awful woman.
42
00:02:13,842 --> 00:02:15,197
She won't be attending tonight.
43
00:02:15,199 --> 00:02:17,344
She was kicked in the face by her horse.
44
00:02:17,346 --> 00:02:19,426
Oh. That poor thing. Is the horse okay?
45
00:02:20,557 --> 00:02:23,350
Mm-mm-mm.
46
00:02:23,352 --> 00:02:26,520
Looks like we still got
ourselves a team divided here.
47
00:02:26,522 --> 00:02:28,355
Coach, you know what I'm
thinkin' about right now?
48
00:02:28,357 --> 00:02:30,815
- West Side Story?
- You know it. Sharks and Jets.
49
00:02:30,817 --> 00:02:31,900
You think these fellas
50
00:02:31,902 --> 00:02:34,778
could solve their problems with
a dance-off at a gymnasium?
51
00:02:34,780 --> 00:02:36,488
Course, if memory serves,
52
00:02:36,490 --> 00:02:37,552
Riff and Bernardo ended up
53
00:02:37,554 --> 00:02:40,116
getting knifed to death
at that particular event.
54
00:02:40,118 --> 00:02:42,410
No, they didn't die until
the rumble afterwards.
55
00:02:42,412 --> 00:02:43,578
Oh, right. Right, right, right.
56
00:02:43,580 --> 00:02:45,580
When I was 15, I was
understudy for Anita.
57
00:02:46,667 --> 00:02:49,000
- All-boys school.
- Hmm.
58
00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:52,128
We have peeled yet another
juicy layer of the Nathan onion.
59
00:02:52,130 --> 00:02:54,464
- Coach Beard!
- Uh-oh.
60
00:02:54,466 --> 00:02:58,885
For dinner tonight, it's
either chicken or steak!
61
00:02:58,887 --> 00:03:00,846
You can't tick both!
62
00:03:00,848 --> 00:03:02,055
Okay!
63
00:03:02,057 --> 00:03:03,557
Busted.
64
00:03:03,559 --> 00:03:04,766
And Ted!
65
00:03:04,768 --> 00:03:06,017
Uh-oh.
66
00:03:06,019 --> 00:03:09,396
- Yeah!
- I need to know who your plus-one is!
67
00:03:09,398 --> 00:03:12,274
Oh, well, that'd be, uh,
Mr. Two Entrées here.
68
00:03:12,276 --> 00:03:14,946
No, he's already bringing a date!
69
00:03:18,073 --> 00:03:19,698
Hey, you free tonight?
70
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,992
- Oh, I'm free every night, yeah.
- Okay.
71
00:03:21,994 --> 00:03:24,494
- I'm gonna bring Nathan!
- Who?
72
00:03:24,496 --> 00:03:26,705
Nate the Great! He's gonna be my date!
73
00:03:26,707 --> 00:03:30,292
And for obvious reasons, we'd
love to be at table eight!
74
00:03:30,294 --> 00:03:31,877
No!
75
00:03:31,879 --> 00:03:33,459
And Beard, you're having chicken!
76
00:03:37,092 --> 00:03:38,592
Hey, boss.
77
00:03:38,594 --> 00:03:40,719
Ooh! Pajama Friday? Wish I woulda known.
78
00:03:40,721 --> 00:03:42,721
Oh, you're gonna get a
kick outta this story.
79
00:03:42,723 --> 00:03:45,015
- When I was 17...
- Ted, let me just stop you there
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00:03:45,017 --> 00:03:47,475
before you tell me a folksy
anecdote about you and pajamas.
81
00:03:47,477 --> 00:03:49,394
Okay. When you change your
mind, just let me know,
82
00:03:49,396 --> 00:03:51,771
'cause this one is a doozy.
83
00:03:51,773 --> 00:03:53,940
Sorry, was there anything you
needed? 'Cause I'm really...
84
00:03:53,942 --> 00:03:55,589
I was wondering if me, Roy and Jamie
85
00:03:55,591 --> 00:03:57,068
could all sit at the same table tonight.
86
00:03:57,070 --> 00:03:58,153
- Is that possible?
- Yes.
87
00:03:58,155 --> 00:04:00,343
Great! 'Cause I got some
fences I need to mend,
88
00:04:00,345 --> 00:04:02,414
- and I think that might do the trick.
- Ted, I just said yes.
89
00:04:02,416 --> 00:04:03,783
Right.
90
00:04:03,785 --> 00:04:06,115
Oh, God, that one's
absolutely beautiful, but...
91
00:04:07,456 --> 00:04:09,456
I don't think I can get
away with that anymore.
92
00:04:09,458 --> 00:04:11,458
Sure you could. Fashion's
all about confidence.
93
00:04:11,460 --> 00:04:12,773
If I didn't have any confidence,
94
00:04:12,775 --> 00:04:14,503
I never would've worn pajamas to my prom
95
00:04:14,505 --> 00:04:16,162
and ended up in jail
the rest of that night.
96
00:04:16,164 --> 00:04:17,923
But you don't wanna hear that
story, so I ain't gonna tell it.
97
00:04:17,925 --> 00:04:19,257
You know what? I'll get outta your hair.
98
00:04:19,259 --> 00:04:21,885
You're probably all revved up
because of the big shindig, right?
99
00:04:21,887 --> 00:04:23,386
No, no, no. I'm absolutely fine.
100
00:04:23,388 --> 00:04:26,223
I mean, even when Rupert and I
were running the gala together,
101
00:04:26,225 --> 00:04:28,141
I did most of the work myself.
102
00:04:28,143 --> 00:04:29,684
So, uh, I'm not revved up at all.
103
00:04:29,686 --> 00:04:32,646
I'm actually, really,
feeling quite mellow.
104
00:04:32,648 --> 00:04:34,940
Good afternoon. We have a huge problem.
105
00:04:34,942 --> 00:04:37,901
Our musical guest, Robbie
Williams, has canceled.
106
00:04:37,903 --> 00:04:38,985
God!
107
00:04:38,987 --> 00:04:40,195
Oh, no. Who is that?
108
00:04:40,197 --> 00:04:43,553
No, no, no. That's absolutely
fine. It's not a problem.
109
00:04:43,555 --> 00:04:45,033
Let me just think.
110
00:04:45,035 --> 00:04:47,285
All right, here's what
we're going to do, Higgins.
111
00:04:47,287 --> 00:04:50,455
Tonight, when I tell everyone
that Robbie has canceled,
112
00:04:50,457 --> 00:04:51,978
by then it won't matter
113
00:04:51,980 --> 00:04:54,459
because you will have
found someone better.
114
00:04:54,461 --> 00:04:56,253
- There ya are.
- Right.
115
00:04:56,255 --> 00:05:00,173
I am a world-class problem solver.
116
00:05:00,175 --> 00:05:03,545
There it is. Oh. You got it. Oh.
Catch it! Yep! Ho! Look at that!
117
00:05:04,555 --> 00:05:06,221
You got this, Higgins!
118
00:05:06,223 --> 00:05:08,265
And Rebecca's grateful
for all your hard work!
119
00:05:08,267 --> 00:05:09,267
Thank you, Ted!
120
00:05:14,982 --> 00:05:15,982
Mm.
121
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:18,567
No. I hate it, babe.
122
00:05:18,569 --> 00:05:21,862
It's just not me.
There's no hood, no zips.
123
00:05:21,864 --> 00:05:23,034
There's no graffiti.
124
00:05:25,409 --> 00:05:27,075
No graffiti.
125
00:05:27,077 --> 00:05:29,119
Mad. I look like a banker.
126
00:05:29,121 --> 00:05:31,663
Not with trousers that tight
around the crotch, you don't.
127
00:05:31,665 --> 00:05:34,374
Fine. I look like a banker
with a great cock.
128
00:05:34,376 --> 00:05:36,456
Babe, if those existed,
we wouldn't be together.
129
00:05:37,713 --> 00:05:39,838
Whatever.
130
00:05:39,840 --> 00:05:40,922
Okay.
131
00:05:40,924 --> 00:05:42,713
Look, you're gonna get more endorsements
132
00:05:42,715 --> 00:05:44,801
when you start embracing high fashion.
133
00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:46,563
I'm just trying to help
build up your brand.
134
00:05:47,681 --> 00:05:49,472
Jamie, no. What are you doing?
135
00:05:49,474 --> 00:05:50,684
I'm doing...
136
00:05:51,852 --> 00:05:52,902
style.
137
00:05:53,770 --> 00:05:57,230
Yeah, people don't know it, but
I'm good at this fashion shit.
138
00:05:57,232 --> 00:05:59,983
- Are you?
- Yeah, I'm like a progeny.
139
00:05:59,985 --> 00:06:01,025
Oh, yeah?
140
00:06:01,820 --> 00:06:03,320
Oi. Down, boy.
141
00:06:04,239 --> 00:06:05,488
Mm-hmm.
142
00:06:05,490 --> 00:06:07,240
That's a good boy. Find the treat, yeah.
143
00:06:09,828 --> 00:06:11,244
Hey, hon.
144
00:06:11,246 --> 00:06:14,456
Shoot, I was hoping I'd catch
ya. Uh, got your message.
145
00:06:14,458 --> 00:06:17,959
Playing a little phone tag,
it appears. And you are now it.
146
00:06:17,961 --> 00:06:19,794
Um... Oh, hey. Guess what.
147
00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:22,047
I'm wearing the suit you
told me I should bring.
148
00:06:22,049 --> 00:06:24,549
You were right, as always.
149
00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:29,596
Uh, yeah. Okay, so, uh,
that's it. I love... I miss ya.
150
00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:32,224
And, uh, just go ahead and give
the little guy a squeeze for me.
151
00:06:32,226 --> 00:06:33,725
I'll talk to you soon. Bye.
152
00:06:35,771 --> 00:06:37,479
Hey. All right, now.
153
00:06:37,481 --> 00:06:39,231
Gotta love a troubadour.
154
00:06:39,233 --> 00:06:40,323
Here we go.
155
00:06:41,985 --> 00:06:44,027
Holy moly, look at you. Whoo!
156
00:06:44,029 --> 00:06:45,570
- Hope I'm not too early.
- No.
157
00:06:45,572 --> 00:06:47,447
Or too late. I was trying to
go for somewhere in between.
158
00:06:47,449 --> 00:06:49,366
Yeah, no. You threaded
that needle perfectly, Nate.
159
00:06:49,368 --> 00:06:51,117
- Oh, good.
- Yeah, nailed it.
160
00:06:51,119 --> 00:06:52,869
Hey, let me ask you something.
161
00:06:52,871 --> 00:06:55,288
Are you one of those guys that
likes it if your friends tell you
162
00:06:55,290 --> 00:06:57,126
you got a piece of food in your teeth?
163
00:06:57,128 --> 00:06:58,291
Oh, absolutely, yeah.
164
00:06:58,293 --> 00:07:01,127
Okay, good. 'Cause that
suit does not fit at all.
165
00:07:01,129 --> 00:07:02,629
- Really?
- Yeah.
166
00:07:02,631 --> 00:07:05,841
I was gonna buy one, but,
you know, they're so expensive.
167
00:07:05,843 --> 00:07:08,260
- I just thought I'd borrow my dad's.
- Oh, I hear ya.
168
00:07:08,262 --> 00:07:10,512
Hey. We'll make a little
pit stop. Come on, follow me.
169
00:07:10,514 --> 00:07:11,514
Yeah.
170
00:07:16,812 --> 00:07:18,937
What you lookin' at? Hmm? Hmm?
171
00:07:18,939 --> 00:07:22,524
You boys all right? How's
my suit? All good? Yeah?
172
00:07:22,526 --> 00:07:23,817
This is great.
173
00:07:23,819 --> 00:07:26,570
Hey, uh, thank you, guys, so
much for taking my picture.
174
00:07:26,572 --> 00:07:28,905
What are your names?
175
00:07:28,907 --> 00:07:31,324
So you're Jerry, and you're Dave.
176
00:07:31,326 --> 00:07:33,285
What you all came for.
177
00:07:33,287 --> 00:07:36,329
Left eyebrow. Right eyebrow.
178
00:07:36,331 --> 00:07:37,541
Confused look.
179
00:07:39,126 --> 00:07:41,209
Yeah, now for the one
that you'll actually use.
180
00:07:41,211 --> 00:07:43,251
That's it, darling. How about a kiss?
181
00:07:47,843 --> 00:07:50,135
- Romance is not dead.
- Guys, sorry, sorry. I just...
182
00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:51,845
- Gonna let them take a picture.
- Oh, yeah. Yeah.
183
00:07:51,847 --> 00:07:53,889
I just need to get inside. Okay.
184
00:07:53,891 --> 00:07:55,807
Rebecca, over here!
185
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:57,934
- Nice, ladies.
- Rebecca, over here!
186
00:07:57,936 --> 00:08:00,061
- You look perfect.
- Now, look to your left.
187
00:08:00,063 --> 00:08:01,146
I hate this part.
188
00:08:01,148 --> 00:08:03,356
- Miss Welton.
- Lovely. Nice.
189
00:08:03,358 --> 00:08:04,774
Hey.
190
00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:06,818
Just put one foot in
front of the other, yeah?
191
00:08:06,820 --> 00:08:10,322
And then put your hand on your
hip and make, like, a claw shape.
192
00:08:10,324 --> 00:08:11,534
It's the most flattering.
193
00:08:12,701 --> 00:08:14,534
- Rebecca, give us a smile.
- Rebecca!
194
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:20,373
Aw, look at her. She's fucking fit!
195
00:08:34,222 --> 00:08:36,182
Don't strut. Let the suit do the work.
196
00:08:39,727 --> 00:08:40,897
Yoo-hoo.
197
00:08:41,813 --> 00:08:44,105
Ted Lasso. My God.
198
00:08:44,107 --> 00:08:45,315
Right back at ya, boss.
199
00:08:45,317 --> 00:08:47,400
I had a hunch you were
gonna pick this dress.
200
00:08:47,402 --> 00:08:49,819
And may I say, you are
wearing the heck out of it.
201
00:08:49,821 --> 00:08:50,904
Thank you.
202
00:08:50,906 --> 00:08:53,365
Check out Nate. Looking
pretty dapper himself, huh?
203
00:08:53,367 --> 00:08:54,574
Great to see you again.
204
00:08:54,576 --> 00:08:56,366
- Nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
205
00:08:57,579 --> 00:08:58,683
If you'll both excuse me.
206
00:08:58,685 --> 00:09:00,379
Absolutely, yeah. Go do your thing.
207
00:09:01,500 --> 00:09:03,917
Oh. Oh, oh, oh. Look,
there's Beard over there.
208
00:09:03,919 --> 00:09:05,919
- That's his new gal, Jane.
- Oh.
209
00:09:05,921 --> 00:09:08,421
Yeah, they met at his
Friday night chess club.
210
00:09:08,423 --> 00:09:10,298
Apparently, they liked
each other's moves.
211
00:09:12,803 --> 00:09:14,052
Oh, that wasn't a joke.
212
00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:15,554
Was it not?
213
00:09:15,556 --> 00:09:16,638
Oh, I guess it kinda was.
214
00:09:16,640 --> 00:09:21,560
No. No. Fuck off. Fuck you. No. No.
215
00:09:22,521 --> 00:09:23,521
Yeah, I know.
216
00:09:27,109 --> 00:09:29,526
This is gonna be so uncomfortable.
217
00:09:29,528 --> 00:09:32,737
- I'm switching tables.
- No, no, no. Hey. Come on back here.
218
00:09:32,739 --> 00:09:33,864
This is my doing.
219
00:09:33,866 --> 00:09:36,076
I parent trapped y'all. Take a seat.
220
00:09:38,662 --> 00:09:40,016
Now, listen. You two knuckleheads
221
00:09:40,018 --> 00:09:41,913
have split our locker room in half.
222
00:09:41,915 --> 00:09:43,540
And when it comes to locker rooms,
223
00:09:43,542 --> 00:09:45,625
I like 'em just like my
mother's bathing suits.
224
00:09:45,627 --> 00:09:47,502
I only wanna see 'em
in one piece, you hear?
225
00:09:47,504 --> 00:09:48,795
So we're fixing this.
226
00:09:48,797 --> 00:09:50,881
Tell me what's the biggest issue
you got with each other. Go.
227
00:09:50,883 --> 00:09:52,132
He's a piece of shit.
228
00:09:52,134 --> 00:09:54,885
If his brain was on fire,
I wouldn't piss in his ear.
229
00:09:54,887 --> 00:09:57,304
Well, hey. You don't need to be
best friends to be great teammates.
230
00:09:57,306 --> 00:10:00,473
Think about Shaq and Kobe,
right? Lennon and McCartney.
231
00:10:00,475 --> 00:10:02,767
Heck, even Woody and Buzz got
under each other's plastic.
232
00:10:02,769 --> 00:10:04,019
Wasn't Woody made out of cloth?
233
00:10:04,021 --> 00:10:06,771
I appreciate you, Nate,
but now's not the time.
234
00:10:06,773 --> 00:10:09,065
You know what all those
dynamic duos had in common?
235
00:10:09,067 --> 00:10:10,775
Mutual respect.
236
00:10:10,777 --> 00:10:12,340
Y'all gotta find some common ground.
237
00:10:12,342 --> 00:10:13,945
So who wants to get the ball rollin'?
238
00:10:13,947 --> 00:10:15,197
I do.
239
00:10:16,074 --> 00:10:20,285
Nate, that's a very nice
suit. I think you look chic.
240
00:10:20,287 --> 00:10:21,850
Oh, thank you.
241
00:10:21,852 --> 00:10:24,539
It's actually only the
second suit I've ever owned.
242
00:10:24,541 --> 00:10:27,591
The first one was my suit
when I was a naked baby.
243
00:10:31,215 --> 00:10:33,215
Sorry, it's funny when Ted says it. I...
244
00:10:33,217 --> 00:10:34,633
Well, the term "birthday suit"
245
00:10:34,635 --> 00:10:36,760
- woulda helped you a ton there, yeah.
- Oh, God, yeah.
246
00:10:36,762 --> 00:10:38,174
Come on, let's try
this again, all right?
247
00:10:38,176 --> 00:10:39,429
Hey, Jamie. You wanna go?
248
00:10:39,431 --> 00:10:40,971
Pass.
249
00:10:41,850 --> 00:10:43,475
- Roy.
- He's a piece of shit.
250
00:10:43,477 --> 00:10:45,602
You're gonna stick with that, huh? Okay.
251
00:10:45,604 --> 00:10:48,063
Here's an idea that's gonna help
a little or hurt a whole lot.
252
00:10:48,065 --> 00:10:49,185
Who needs a drink?
253
00:10:54,655 --> 00:10:56,238
Any progress with the musical guest?
254
00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:57,864
I've talked to a number of agents
255
00:10:57,866 --> 00:11:01,910
and made a fairly extensive
list of those who cannot make it.
256
00:11:01,912 --> 00:11:03,752
Process of elimination.
We're on our way.
257
00:11:07,000 --> 00:11:08,370
Hey, there she is.
258
00:11:09,586 --> 00:11:11,753
Oh, you're working on your speech, huh?
259
00:11:11,755 --> 00:11:15,465
Rupert was always very good
at the public speaking part.
260
00:11:15,467 --> 00:11:16,967
Hey, here's a little trick of the trade.
261
00:11:16,969 --> 00:11:20,512
Just make fun of yourself
right off the bat, a little joke.
262
00:11:20,514 --> 00:11:21,596
Folks will love that.
263
00:11:21,598 --> 00:11:24,474
Okay, so, what should I
make fun of myself about?
264
00:11:24,476 --> 00:11:28,516
Right, right, right. Um...
265
00:11:30,614 --> 00:11:35,235
You know... You know what
would be, uh... No. Okay.
266
00:11:35,237 --> 00:11:37,320
You're not gonna walk into
that one, are you, Ted?
267
00:11:37,322 --> 00:11:39,492
No, ma'am. Nope, nope, nope. Okay.
268
00:11:40,951 --> 00:11:42,161
Good luck though.
269
00:11:43,453 --> 00:11:46,673
Oh, oh, oh. You know what? I
thought of something. No, no, no.
270
00:11:47,457 --> 00:11:50,083
- Queen to rook four.
- Ooh.
271
00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:52,335
Wait, are y'all playing
a game without a board?
272
00:11:53,547 --> 00:11:56,007
Sorry to interrupt.
My fault. Sorry. Carry on.
273
00:11:57,634 --> 00:11:59,644
Knight to king five.
274
00:12:04,600 --> 00:12:05,849
Good evening,
275
00:12:05,851 --> 00:12:08,748
and welcome to the Tenth Annual Benefit
276
00:12:08,750 --> 00:12:11,062
for Underprivileged Children.
277
00:12:11,064 --> 00:12:13,461
If I could hug each
of you as a thank you
278
00:12:13,463 --> 00:12:15,614
for your kind donations, well...
279
00:12:16,427 --> 00:12:18,182
I probably wouldn't
because, as we all know,
280
00:12:18,184 --> 00:12:19,654
I'm not much of a hugger.
281
00:12:21,658 --> 00:12:24,514
Now, I do hope you've all brought
your checkbooks with you
282
00:12:24,516 --> 00:12:25,911
for our auction later.
283
00:12:25,913 --> 00:12:31,917
Because you can all bid on
our very own Richmond players.
284
00:12:34,296 --> 00:12:36,067
Same rule as always,
285
00:12:36,069 --> 00:12:39,799
no hanky-panky unless
the player signs a waiver.
286
00:12:41,470 --> 00:12:42,470
Rupert?
287
00:12:43,847 --> 00:12:44,971
Hello, darling.
288
00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:47,891
What a... lovely surprise.
289
00:12:47,893 --> 00:12:49,903
Oh. Weren't you expecting me?
290
00:12:51,396 --> 00:12:53,230
Only 'cause you RSVP'd no.
291
00:12:53,232 --> 00:12:56,566
Well, one of the perks of being
a wealthy good-for-nothing.
292
00:12:56,568 --> 00:12:59,861
Sometimes my nights
just magically free up.
293
00:12:59,863 --> 00:13:02,823
Ooh. May I? Thank you.
294
00:13:03,575 --> 00:13:09,454
Gals and gents, with your help,
we raised £800,000 last year.
295
00:13:11,542 --> 00:13:14,376
And this year, hopefully even more.
296
00:13:14,378 --> 00:13:18,588
Well, I know I'm crashing your
party, but I so badly wanna help.
297
00:13:18,590 --> 00:13:21,383
My fingers and toes are
crossed that you will have me.
298
00:13:21,385 --> 00:13:22,385
Of course.
299
00:13:23,136 --> 00:13:24,970
Uh, let's get him a
seat at the boring table.
300
00:13:24,972 --> 00:13:27,347
- Oh-ho!
- Only joking.
301
00:13:27,349 --> 00:13:29,683
Table four. Rupert Mannion, everyone.
302
00:13:37,067 --> 00:13:38,147
Thanks, doll.
303
00:13:44,199 --> 00:13:45,529
Oh, my God.
304
00:13:46,535 --> 00:13:48,118
- Thank you.
- Oh, that...
305
00:13:48,120 --> 00:13:51,496
Nathe, Nathe, Nathe. Come on.
306
00:13:51,498 --> 00:13:53,540
Look, guys, this is a brand-new suit.
307
00:13:53,542 --> 00:13:54,771
Rather than messing with me tonight,
308
00:13:54,773 --> 00:13:56,293
can you just get me two times tomorrow?
309
00:13:56,295 --> 00:13:57,919
Roy said we're not allowed anymore.
310
00:13:57,921 --> 00:14:00,839
He fucking headbutted me.
I'm still dizzy half the time.
311
00:14:00,841 --> 00:14:02,471
The doctors told me not to drink.
312
00:14:05,846 --> 00:14:08,364
Ah! Shit.
313
00:14:08,366 --> 00:14:10,459
Yet another reason shirts exist.
314
00:14:10,461 --> 00:14:13,560
Shut up, it's not funny.
Burned my nipple.
315
00:14:13,562 --> 00:14:16,272
I wish I was that ice cube.
316
00:14:17,024 --> 00:14:20,525
Mm? I will be bidding
for a night with you.
317
00:14:20,527 --> 00:14:22,444
Oh. Thanks, love. Uh...
318
00:14:22,446 --> 00:14:24,225
Yeah, it's, um, it's just a date though.
319
00:14:24,227 --> 00:14:26,072
It's not a whole night. So...
320
00:14:26,074 --> 00:14:28,575
We'll see.
321
00:14:28,577 --> 00:14:29,826
Mate, I've done these before.
322
00:14:29,828 --> 00:14:32,704
If she bids over 3,000,
you will have to fuck her.
323
00:14:34,249 --> 00:14:36,539
- Is that true?
- You don't have to go all the way.
324
00:14:37,336 --> 00:14:38,876
Just, like, some of the way.
325
00:14:39,630 --> 00:14:40,800
Fingering.
326
00:14:45,052 --> 00:14:47,344
Fuck you. Fuck this table.
327
00:14:47,346 --> 00:14:49,429
Jamie, it was a joke.
328
00:14:49,431 --> 00:14:51,771
It was a joke. Jamie.
329
00:14:53,477 --> 00:14:54,597
What happened now?
330
00:14:55,771 --> 00:14:59,111
Just the usual. Jamie being
a little bitch prima donna.
331
00:15:00,901 --> 00:15:02,526
Roy, let me ask you something.
332
00:15:02,528 --> 00:15:04,694
What were you like when you were 23?
333
00:15:04,696 --> 00:15:06,656
Playing in this league,
making all that money.
334
00:15:08,033 --> 00:15:10,909
- Little bitch prima donna.
- Yeah.
335
00:15:10,911 --> 00:15:13,831
You know how they say that
"youth is wasted on the young"?
336
00:15:15,582 --> 00:15:18,672
Well, I say don't let the wisdom
of age be wasted on you.
337
00:15:20,087 --> 00:15:21,127
Ted?
338
00:15:23,465 --> 00:15:26,215
I just came up with that.
I feel pretty good about it.
339
00:15:32,599 --> 00:15:35,141
I just wanted to say thanks
for talking to Colin and Isaac.
340
00:15:35,143 --> 00:15:36,852
Why is your face so close to mine?
341
00:15:36,854 --> 00:15:38,374
Well, my initial plan was to hug you,
342
00:15:38,376 --> 00:15:39,944
but I just chickened out just now.
343
00:15:40,774 --> 00:15:41,784
Right.
344
00:15:46,280 --> 00:15:48,029
- Okay, we're done.
- Yeah.
345
00:15:50,367 --> 00:15:52,993
Ted, I'd like to introduce
you to Rupert Mannion.
346
00:15:52,995 --> 00:15:55,620
- Mr. Mannion, how are you?
- Oh. It's Rupert, Ted.
347
00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:58,252
Especially for the man
who's managing my club.
348
00:15:59,293 --> 00:16:00,584
Used to be your club.
349
00:16:00,586 --> 00:16:04,086
Oh, of course, of course, but...
it's still my club in here, love.
350
00:16:04,882 --> 00:16:06,882
Love of a sports team
is a lifetime obsession.
351
00:16:06,884 --> 00:16:07,899
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
352
00:16:07,901 --> 00:16:09,926
Kinda like your best
friend's older sister, right?
353
00:16:09,928 --> 00:16:11,011
Hey, but do me a favor.
354
00:16:11,013 --> 00:16:12,158
If you're ever in Kansas City
355
00:16:12,160 --> 00:16:13,805
and come across a fella
named Tom Dineen,
356
00:16:13,807 --> 00:16:15,098
don't tell him I said that.
357
00:16:17,019 --> 00:16:18,769
I love that.
358
00:16:19,646 --> 00:16:22,147
I don't love our last two losses though.
359
00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:23,481
- Horrible showing.
- Yeah.
360
00:16:23,483 --> 00:16:24,858
Had to say it, wish I didn't.
361
00:16:24,860 --> 00:16:28,403
It's okay. Who knows? Maybe
we'll turn it around, huh?
362
00:16:28,405 --> 00:16:31,198
Oh, my God. I believe you.
363
00:16:31,200 --> 00:16:32,280
Do you believe him?
364
00:16:35,662 --> 00:16:38,079
Night's gonna take a turn
for the worse if you say no.
365
00:16:38,081 --> 00:16:40,251
Of course I believe in Ted.
366
00:16:41,210 --> 00:16:42,960
He's exactly what we've needed.
367
00:16:44,671 --> 00:16:46,463
Not too much champagne now, dear.
368
00:16:46,465 --> 00:16:48,505
Gotta stay sharp for the auction.
369
00:16:49,635 --> 00:16:51,510
Why don't you do the auction?
370
00:16:51,512 --> 00:16:53,386
No, I couldn't. This is your night.
371
00:16:53,388 --> 00:16:56,348
We both know they'd rather see you.
372
00:16:56,350 --> 00:16:59,851
And besides, it's... for the children.
373
00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:01,063
For the children.
374
00:17:04,107 --> 00:17:07,025
Right. If you'll excuse me, I
need to speak to the other guests.
375
00:17:07,027 --> 00:17:09,110
I must say, I love that dress.
376
00:17:09,112 --> 00:17:10,194
Oh.
377
00:17:10,196 --> 00:17:11,316
It's very youthful.
378
00:17:12,156 --> 00:17:14,656
Good for you for getting back
out there looking like that.
379
00:17:15,743 --> 00:17:16,743
Thank you.
380
00:17:19,122 --> 00:17:20,122
Excuse me.
381
00:17:20,874 --> 00:17:22,332
Ted.
382
00:17:22,334 --> 00:17:24,625
It's been a hard year
for her. Is she okay?
383
00:17:24,627 --> 00:17:26,168
- Oh, yeah, she's great.
- Mm.
384
00:17:26,170 --> 00:17:28,025
You know, a lot of moving
pieces putting together
385
00:17:28,027 --> 00:17:29,585
a thing like this though.
386
00:17:30,342 --> 00:17:32,238
And then she had this fella...
387
00:17:32,240 --> 00:17:34,094
Robbie Williams cancel on her and...
388
00:17:34,096 --> 00:17:35,178
- Robbie?
- Yeah.
389
00:17:35,180 --> 00:17:36,914
- Well, he's an old pal of mine.
- Mm.
390
00:17:36,916 --> 00:17:40,225
I'm happy to text him. I bet
you I can get his ass over here.
391
00:17:40,227 --> 00:17:42,435
I... I bet she'd love it.
392
00:17:42,437 --> 00:17:45,227
I'll go, uh, track her down and,
uh, run it up the flagpole, huh?
393
00:17:45,983 --> 00:17:47,899
I'm sorry. That's an
expression from back home.
394
00:17:47,901 --> 00:17:50,944
- Just means I'm gonna ask her.
- Fabulous. Showtime.
395
00:17:50,946 --> 00:17:52,779
All right, go get 'em.
396
00:17:52,781 --> 00:17:54,176
Can I get something stronger,
397
00:17:54,178 --> 00:17:55,719
like a Jack on the rocks or something?
398
00:17:55,721 --> 00:17:58,451
A double and a single in one. A triple.
399
00:17:59,872 --> 00:18:03,081
Ladies and gentlemen,
slight change in plans.
400
00:18:03,083 --> 00:18:07,252
I have been cajoled into being
your auctioneer for this evening.
401
00:18:09,464 --> 00:18:13,434
And our first victim is Jamie Tartt.
402
00:18:17,055 --> 00:18:18,471
Babe, you have to win me.
403
00:18:18,473 --> 00:18:20,785
I can't bid on my own
boyfriend. I'll look pathetic.
404
00:18:20,787 --> 00:18:22,601
Babe, it's 2020. Women can do anything.
405
00:18:22,603 --> 00:18:25,187
No, it's not happening. Come
on, you look hot. Go up there!
406
00:18:25,189 --> 00:18:29,774
Look at him, folks. Young,
gorgeous, charming. The bastard.
407
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:32,736
So, we'll start with £5,000.
408
00:18:32,738 --> 00:18:34,404
I want him, Rupert.
409
00:18:34,406 --> 00:18:37,699
Ooh. Five thousand from Cheryl Barnaby.
410
00:18:37,701 --> 00:18:40,410
Richmond's premier
breeder of Shetland ponies.
411
00:18:40,412 --> 00:18:42,162
Do we hear six?
412
00:18:44,082 --> 00:18:45,290
Six thousand.
413
00:18:45,292 --> 00:18:46,833
Oh. Six. Thank you.
414
00:18:46,835 --> 00:18:49,920
- Seven thousand.
- Seven thousand.
415
00:18:49,922 --> 00:18:51,338
Ten thousand.
416
00:18:51,340 --> 00:18:53,131
Oh!
417
00:18:53,133 --> 00:18:54,633
Stunning.
418
00:18:54,635 --> 00:18:57,761
Uh, and that applies to
the bid and the bidder.
419
00:18:57,763 --> 00:19:00,023
I don't think so.
420
00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:03,099
- Twelve thousand pounds.
- Fourteen thousand.
421
00:19:03,101 --> 00:19:04,684
Fourteen thousand!
422
00:19:04,686 --> 00:19:05,894
Sixteen thousand.
423
00:19:05,896 --> 00:19:07,479
Eighteen.
424
00:19:07,481 --> 00:19:10,398
Eighteen thousand.
Do I hear any advance?
425
00:19:10,400 --> 00:19:12,359
Yeah. Twenty-five thousand.
426
00:19:12,361 --> 00:19:17,447
Twenty-five thousand! Going once. Twice.
427
00:19:17,449 --> 00:19:19,282
Sold to Keeley Jones.
428
00:19:19,284 --> 00:19:22,056
Why spend the time with
your boyfriend for free
429
00:19:22,058 --> 00:19:24,287
when you can have him for 25 grand?
430
00:19:24,289 --> 00:19:25,709
You owe me.
431
00:19:29,711 --> 00:19:33,255
Hey. There you are. Getting
a little fresh air, huh?
432
00:19:33,257 --> 00:19:36,570
Yeah. Those rickshaw
bike things are so silly,
433
00:19:36,572 --> 00:19:38,510
- but they do look like fun.
- Yeah.
434
00:19:38,512 --> 00:19:40,303
- You ever been on one?
- No, ma'am.
435
00:19:40,305 --> 00:19:42,201
My wife and I once rented one of those
436
00:19:42,203 --> 00:19:44,891
tandem bikes on vacation a while back.
437
00:19:44,893 --> 00:19:48,270
Not the best experience. She
broke her arm and I actually, uh...
438
00:19:48,272 --> 00:19:51,782
Well, I chipped a tooth, and
I bruised my perineum. Oof.
439
00:19:54,194 --> 00:19:56,454
- Hey, you okay?
- Oh, it's just...
440
00:19:57,906 --> 00:19:59,116
That man, he knows me.
441
00:20:00,367 --> 00:20:02,430
I used to think his blunt honesty
442
00:20:02,432 --> 00:20:04,286
was noble rather than what it really is.
443
00:20:04,288 --> 00:20:05,288
Which is just...
444
00:20:07,583 --> 00:20:10,293
the cruelest way of hiding
his own insecurities.
445
00:20:11,461 --> 00:20:13,921
He'd say wear this, eat that.
446
00:20:16,758 --> 00:20:18,298
And I listened.
447
00:20:19,511 --> 00:20:20,891
But now I'm alone.
448
00:20:22,556 --> 00:20:25,926
I'm alone, Ted. Just like
he said I would be if I left.
449
00:20:30,272 --> 00:20:31,692
I don't want to be alone.
450
00:20:36,528 --> 00:20:39,318
Hey. It's okay. Okay.
451
00:20:52,836 --> 00:20:56,796
You wanna hop on this thing and
get the heck outta Dodge? Come on.
452
00:20:56,798 --> 00:20:57,928
I wish.
453
00:20:59,218 --> 00:21:00,838
Not right now. Thank you though.
454
00:21:04,973 --> 00:21:07,641
Has he... Has he started the auction?
455
00:21:07,643 --> 00:21:08,725
Yeah, yeah.
456
00:21:08,727 --> 00:21:11,647
Good. I'm glad he's done that.
We'll get much more money.
457
00:21:12,940 --> 00:21:15,070
No matter what he does,
they just love him.
458
00:21:18,278 --> 00:21:21,696
- You wanna head back in?
- No, you go ahead.
459
00:21:21,698 --> 00:21:22,781
I need to freshen up.
460
00:21:22,783 --> 00:21:26,826
I probably look like Robert Smith
after he's woken up from a nap.
461
00:21:26,828 --> 00:21:30,205
Very emotional man. Yeah.
462
00:21:30,207 --> 00:21:31,377
Okay, I'll see you inside.
463
00:21:43,303 --> 00:21:44,386
When I was coming up,
464
00:21:44,388 --> 00:21:46,888
there was this old geezer
at the club, Doug Stashwick.
465
00:21:46,890 --> 00:21:49,599
He was always on me. Hated each other.
466
00:21:49,601 --> 00:21:52,394
- You wanna know how we won the league?
- No.
467
00:21:52,396 --> 00:21:54,813
It was the same shit
Yankee Doodle was peddling.
468
00:21:54,815 --> 00:21:57,190
He sat me down and he said,
"Let's get it all out there.
469
00:21:57,192 --> 00:22:00,072
You tell me why I'm a prick,
and I'll tell you why you are".
470
00:22:02,491 --> 00:22:04,451
- You're a nasty bastard...
- No, I'm going first.
471
00:22:05,742 --> 00:22:08,872
Even though I know I
should pass to you...
472
00:22:10,038 --> 00:22:11,955
you're so selfish and arrogant.
473
00:22:11,957 --> 00:22:14,077
Every time I do, it makes
me want to fucking puke.
474
00:22:16,587 --> 00:22:20,257
You know, I had a poster of
you on my wall when I was a kid.
475
00:22:21,758 --> 00:22:23,588
Used to love watching you play.
476
00:22:25,721 --> 00:22:28,430
But you're not the player
that you used to be,
477
00:22:28,432 --> 00:22:30,765
and just because you won a few trophies,
478
00:22:30,767 --> 00:22:33,847
you walk around here expecting
everyone to kiss your ring.
479
00:22:36,815 --> 00:22:39,895
Yeah, I can be like that.
480
00:22:45,699 --> 00:22:48,366
Now's the bit where you
admit to what I said.
481
00:22:48,368 --> 00:22:50,118
I don't wanna.
482
00:22:51,997 --> 00:22:53,207
Even if it is just...
483
00:22:54,666 --> 00:22:55,746
a little bit true.
484
00:23:01,215 --> 00:23:03,381
You and that Doug bloke,
you ever become friends?
485
00:23:03,383 --> 00:23:05,509
Fuck no. I hope he's dead.
486
00:23:07,638 --> 00:23:09,387
To you dying.
487
00:23:11,225 --> 00:23:12,516
Such a prick.
488
00:23:15,646 --> 00:23:16,978
Howdy, partner.
489
00:23:18,607 --> 00:23:22,359
So, you ask Rebecca what she
thought about texting Robbie?
490
00:23:22,361 --> 00:23:25,563
You know what? I couldn't find
her. I say don't worry about it.
491
00:23:25,565 --> 00:23:26,717
If you change your mind,
492
00:23:26,719 --> 00:23:28,532
say the word and... sent.
493
00:23:28,534 --> 00:23:31,576
He'll be right over. Top up.
494
00:23:31,578 --> 00:23:33,787
Hey, Rupert, something
just occurred to me.
495
00:23:33,789 --> 00:23:37,249
If you could've texted Robbie Williams
asking him to come tonight...
496
00:23:38,794 --> 00:23:42,174
you could've probably just as
easily asked him not to come.
497
00:23:44,508 --> 00:23:47,428
Well, now, that would've made me
a real piece of shit, wouldn't it?
498
00:23:53,767 --> 00:23:56,310
Hey, Ted. Uh, do you think Rebecca knows
499
00:23:56,312 --> 00:23:57,687
what the real Adele looks like?
500
00:23:58,897 --> 00:24:01,231
I need to go on a little
adventure, and I need a copilot.
501
00:24:01,233 --> 00:24:03,942
- And you want me?
- Yeah. Forget the rest, I need the best.
502
00:24:03,944 --> 00:24:06,204
Come on, follow me.
503
00:24:10,826 --> 00:24:13,535
- Thank you, by the way.
- Huh?
504
00:24:13,537 --> 00:24:17,706
The, um, red carpet
photos are already online,
505
00:24:17,708 --> 00:24:21,418
and I actually look all right for once.
506
00:24:21,420 --> 00:24:22,920
Oh. Glad to help.
507
00:24:26,592 --> 00:24:27,716
- Keeley?
- Mm-hmm?
508
00:24:27,718 --> 00:24:28,800
I think you should know
509
00:24:28,802 --> 00:24:31,016
that the young woman
that was bidding on Jamie
510
00:24:31,018 --> 00:24:32,742
was actually his other plus-one.
511
00:24:34,850 --> 00:24:36,440
Cheeky little prick.
512
00:24:39,897 --> 00:24:42,480
- Can I have a sip of your drink?
- Oh, yes.
513
00:24:42,482 --> 00:24:43,690
Thanks.
514
00:24:43,692 --> 00:24:46,610
In anything else, I hate olives.
515
00:24:46,612 --> 00:24:51,531
I think the little, like, orange
clitoris thing is really freaky.
516
00:24:53,911 --> 00:24:56,369
Have you ever dated a footballer?
517
00:24:56,371 --> 00:24:58,955
- What?
- Sorry.
518
00:24:58,957 --> 00:25:02,334
I shouldn't laugh. It sounds... judgy.
519
00:25:02,336 --> 00:25:04,544
No, it's okay. You are a bit judgy.
520
00:25:04,546 --> 00:25:07,546
So when I was 18, I dated
a footballer that was 23.
521
00:25:08,717 --> 00:25:10,487
Now I'm close to 30,
522
00:25:10,489 --> 00:25:13,094
and I am still dating a
23-year-old footballer.
523
00:25:13,096 --> 00:25:15,966
I'm Leonardo DiCaprio.
524
00:25:17,851 --> 00:25:19,021
They are pretty fun though.
525
00:25:19,931 --> 00:25:22,433
Simple, rich, fit.
526
00:25:22,435 --> 00:25:24,853
What about accountable?
527
00:25:24,855 --> 00:25:26,608
What do you mean?
528
00:25:26,610 --> 00:25:29,780
Well, I mean, everyone
makes mistakes, but...
529
00:25:31,657 --> 00:25:34,991
I was married to a man for 12 years
530
00:25:34,993 --> 00:25:38,543
who never once took responsibility
for any single one of them.
531
00:25:48,006 --> 00:25:49,256
Hi.
532
00:25:49,258 --> 00:25:50,340
- Hi.
- I'm Keeley.
533
00:25:50,342 --> 00:25:51,424
Hi, I'm Bex.
534
00:25:51,426 --> 00:25:53,301
- Really nice to meet you, Bex.
- Nice to meet you.
535
00:25:53,303 --> 00:25:55,470
Do you mind if I just have a
minute on my own with this one?
536
00:25:55,472 --> 00:25:58,232
Yeah, sure. Lovely to meet you.
537
00:25:59,768 --> 00:26:01,142
She your new girlfriend?
538
00:26:01,144 --> 00:26:04,855
Relax, babe. It's all part
of the branding plan, innit?
539
00:26:04,857 --> 00:26:06,710
If I've got two women bidding on me,
540
00:26:06,712 --> 00:26:08,940
it makes me look more valuable.
Do you know what I mean?
541
00:26:09,778 --> 00:26:11,695
It's fucking smart, eh?
542
00:26:11,697 --> 00:26:15,677
And now, the only former Champions
League winner on the menu,
543
00:26:15,679 --> 00:26:17,534
say hello to Roy Kent.
544
00:26:17,536 --> 00:26:18,576
Granddad.
545
00:26:21,081 --> 00:26:24,353
And the highest bidder
gets to spend a day
546
00:26:24,355 --> 00:26:26,418
at a swanky hotel by the pool
547
00:26:26,420 --> 00:26:30,046
drinking frozen daiquiris
and soaking up the rays...
548
00:26:30,048 --> 00:26:32,340
No, we said there's no
daiquiris and no rays.
549
00:26:32,342 --> 00:26:33,893
Um...
550
00:26:33,895 --> 00:26:35,447
There's not gonna be
a fucking pool either.
551
00:26:35,449 --> 00:26:37,387
We're not leaving SW14.
552
00:26:37,389 --> 00:26:40,140
You looked so jealous. It was so cool.
553
00:26:40,142 --> 00:26:42,100
Oh, you think jealousy is cool, do you?
554
00:26:42,102 --> 00:26:43,685
Don't know, babe. I don't get jealous.
555
00:26:43,687 --> 00:26:45,290
Well, can we have 100 quid
556
00:26:45,292 --> 00:26:47,522
for what's turning out
to be a very boring date?
557
00:26:47,524 --> 00:26:49,816
- All right. A thousand pounds.
- Oh.
558
00:26:49,818 --> 00:26:53,820
- Uh, any advances on that?
- Two thousand pounds!
559
00:26:53,822 --> 00:26:57,157
Ooh! Cheryl's got fire inside her.
560
00:26:57,159 --> 00:27:00,702
- Three thousand pounds.
- Babe, you're just embarrassing yourself.
561
00:27:00,704 --> 00:27:02,704
Four thousand pounds!
562
00:27:02,706 --> 00:27:03,786
Five thousand!
563
00:27:04,541 --> 00:27:06,917
Six thousand pounds.
564
00:27:06,919 --> 00:27:09,039
- Any advance on six?
- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
565
00:27:10,088 --> 00:27:12,130
Okay, sold to Cheryl.
566
00:27:12,132 --> 00:27:13,682
Whoo-hoo!
567
00:27:19,723 --> 00:27:24,733
That concludes the auction,
apart from one small surprise.
568
00:27:25,604 --> 00:27:31,534
I am personally donating
£1 million to the cause.
569
00:27:34,154 --> 00:27:35,654
Thank you.
570
00:27:35,656 --> 00:27:37,531
Thank you very much. Thank you.
571
00:27:37,533 --> 00:27:40,220
And that, I believe, gets Rebecca
572
00:27:40,222 --> 00:27:43,713
over her goal of 800,000. Thank you.
573
00:27:47,459 --> 00:27:48,789
For the children, eh?
574
00:28:00,556 --> 00:28:01,721
Rebecca.
575
00:28:01,723 --> 00:28:05,725
This here is Cam Cole. He's
an undiscovered mega-talent.
576
00:28:05,727 --> 00:28:07,187
Go on, Cam. Show 'em what you got.
577
00:28:11,441 --> 00:28:12,524
Are you insane?
578
00:28:12,526 --> 00:28:13,603
Hey, Rebecca.
579
00:28:13,605 --> 00:28:16,486
You do not wanna judge this
book by its cover right here, okay?
580
00:28:17,865 --> 00:28:18,865
Oh, the hell with it.
581
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:21,620
Ooh. Yes.
582
00:28:22,911 --> 00:28:25,599
Hello again. Uh, ladies and gentlemen,
583
00:28:25,601 --> 00:28:27,921
I regret to inform you that, uh...
584
00:28:29,209 --> 00:28:33,378
Robbie Williams is unable to be
here tonight due to an emergency.
585
00:28:33,380 --> 00:28:36,860
But we have a brilliant
replacement for you
586
00:28:36,862 --> 00:28:38,300
who you are just going to love.
587
00:28:38,302 --> 00:28:41,261
Or, at least, have lots to
talk about on the way home.
588
00:28:41,263 --> 00:28:47,603
Uh, all the way from outside...
please welcome Cam something.
589
00:28:54,818 --> 00:28:56,298
Oh, bollocks.
590
00:28:57,696 --> 00:28:58,796
What does that mean?
591
00:29:12,961 --> 00:29:18,591
♪ Mama, sweet mama nature please
forgive us and what we've done ♪
592
00:29:21,553 --> 00:29:24,596
Can we just forget about the
game and go and have a dance?
593
00:29:24,598 --> 00:29:26,678
Queen to king five. Checkmate.
594
00:29:33,815 --> 00:29:36,858
♪ We've gone and hurt our mama ♪
595
00:29:36,860 --> 00:29:40,070
♪ And her wrath has begun ♪
596
00:30:02,970 --> 00:30:06,010
♪ 'Cause I'm a good boy to my mama ♪
597
00:30:09,101 --> 00:30:13,895
♪ But ♪
598
00:30:13,897 --> 00:30:19,027
♪ I've got bad siblings ♪
599
00:30:27,536 --> 00:30:29,396
- Thank you so much.
- Oh, you're so welcome.
600
00:30:29,398 --> 00:30:32,289
- We really had a great time.
- Thank you so much.
601
00:30:32,291 --> 00:30:33,957
Good night.
602
00:30:33,959 --> 00:30:36,751
Thank you again for such
an unbelievable donation.
603
00:30:36,753 --> 00:30:38,513
- See you again next year.
- Can't wait.
604
00:30:45,470 --> 00:30:47,345
What a charmer, huh?
605
00:30:47,347 --> 00:30:48,847
Indeed.
606
00:30:48,849 --> 00:30:49,849
Hmm.
607
00:30:51,268 --> 00:30:52,996
You may think that you're the only one
608
00:30:52,998 --> 00:30:55,188
that can see who he really is...
609
00:30:56,690 --> 00:30:57,690
but you're not.
610
00:31:04,823 --> 00:31:06,333
Oh, boy. You all right, buddy?
611
00:31:08,410 --> 00:31:10,327
- Quick.
- All right.
612
00:31:10,329 --> 00:31:11,329
Fun night.
613
00:31:12,915 --> 00:31:15,207
Hey, wait, hold on. Slow down, Coach.
614
00:31:19,171 --> 00:31:20,961
Will you stop being mad at me now?
615
00:31:22,549 --> 00:31:24,007
Mm?
616
00:31:24,009 --> 00:31:25,219
I'm sorry, babe.
617
00:31:27,638 --> 00:31:29,971
Do you even know what
you're sorry for, Jamie?
618
00:31:29,973 --> 00:31:31,603
You always ask me that.
619
00:31:32,392 --> 00:31:34,601
Hey, do me a favor.
620
00:31:34,603 --> 00:31:36,613
Don't use me as a prop
in your little fights.
621
00:31:37,564 --> 00:31:38,734
Made me feel like an idiot.
622
00:31:41,068 --> 00:31:43,443
I'm sorry. I...
623
00:31:43,445 --> 00:31:44,655
I shouldn't have done that.
624
00:31:45,906 --> 00:31:47,531
Thanks.
625
00:31:47,533 --> 00:31:49,873
No one was bidding on you
anyway, mate. Just fuck off.
626
00:31:51,411 --> 00:31:52,411
Go on.
627
00:31:56,667 --> 00:31:58,708
What are you saying sorry to him for?
628
00:31:58,710 --> 00:32:00,710
Being accountable matters, Jamie.
629
00:32:03,674 --> 00:32:04,684
We're done.
630
00:32:06,093 --> 00:32:07,093
I'll see you around.
631
00:32:10,931 --> 00:32:11,931
Whatever.
632
00:32:18,438 --> 00:32:20,647
Excuse me, can I take these?
633
00:32:20,649 --> 00:32:21,649
Two?
634
00:32:31,451 --> 00:32:33,535
Do you wanna go get, like, really drunk?
635
00:32:33,537 --> 00:32:36,247
- Yes, I do.
- Then we can go rob a bank or something.
636
00:32:43,005 --> 00:32:45,130
Michelle and Henry are
coming out next weekend.
637
00:32:45,132 --> 00:32:47,215
- Hey, that's great, Coach.
- Yeah.
638
00:32:47,217 --> 00:32:49,593
So come on, tell me about
you and Jane. What happened?
639
00:32:49,595 --> 00:32:51,303
I did it again.
640
00:32:51,305 --> 00:32:54,097
- Put the game before the dame, huh?
- Yup.
641
00:32:54,099 --> 00:32:55,724
When are you gonna learn, Coach?
642
00:33:04,362 --> 00:33:07,362
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
47872
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