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LOVE LIFE
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1910
3
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Throughout human history,
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00:00:11,293 --> 00:00:15,797
sex without love has been prudishly
regarded as a shameful act.
5
00:00:16,590 --> 00:00:19,426
And yet still it happens
every single day.
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00:00:19,510 --> 00:00:22,095
The instructions say washing it
in a warm bath of milk
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is the best manner in which
to prevent disease.
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That's no matter, I use it frequently.
I will rinse it when I return home.
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With advancements in prophylactic
technology, finally there was
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a comfortable barrier that protected
from pregnancy and infection.
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I'll write you.
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00:00:41,740 --> 00:00:46,870
And so all that was left to suffer
from, was the pain of unrequited love.
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THREE
DANNY TWO PHONES
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00:00:52,042 --> 00:00:55,129
2015
A YEAR AFTER BRADLEY
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00:00:59,383 --> 00:01:03,470
Lately Darby had been avoiding
the landmines of love entirely
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by hiding out and exploring Porn Hub.
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Does anybody want breakfast?
I'm gonna...
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00:01:35,962 --> 00:01:37,880
Darby?
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Holy shit, hi.
20
00:01:40,174 --> 00:01:42,301
Oh my god. What...
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00:01:43,010 --> 00:01:45,137
what are you doing
in my neighborhood?
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00:01:45,304 --> 00:01:47,098
I was just getting some coffee here.
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Cool, are you...
24
00:01:50,101 --> 00:01:52,061
back in New York?
Did Politico send you back?
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00:01:52,228 --> 00:01:54,522
No, no, I actually, I quit.
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00:01:55,690 --> 00:01:57,483
Okay, that's amazing.
27
00:01:57,567 --> 00:01:59,944
- Hi, I'm Emily.
- So sorry...
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00:02:00,027 --> 00:02:02,405
Darby, this is Emily...
Emily, Darby.
29
00:02:02,488 --> 00:02:04,240
It's so good to meet you.
30
00:02:04,323 --> 00:02:08,494
So what are you doing now that
you're not in politics?
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00:02:08,578 --> 00:02:10,955
Are you gonna take up golf
or something?
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00:02:11,038 --> 00:02:13,750
Well actually,
Emily writes short stories and...
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00:02:13,833 --> 00:02:17,086
we thought it'd be cool to trek out
a camper van and drive around America.
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Coast to coast.
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00:02:18,546 --> 00:02:21,132
My thesis at Gallatin was
"The Road as a Trope,"
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00:02:21,215 --> 00:02:23,444
so I just think I want to do
a little more writing on that.
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00:02:23,468 --> 00:02:25,803
- See if I can...
- She's an amazing writer.
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00:02:25,887 --> 00:02:28,056
Oh what are you up to?
Are you still working on...
39
00:02:28,222 --> 00:02:30,350
Oh no, I'm at the Whitney now.
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00:02:30,516 --> 00:02:33,353
- Nice, what are you doing there?
- What am I not doing?
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00:02:33,436 --> 00:02:36,022
- I'd really... I'd love to...
- It was so good to see you.
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00:02:36,105 --> 00:02:39,150
- Yes. Totally, great to see you.
- And good luck with everything.
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Hey, it was so good to meet you.
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00:02:41,152 --> 00:02:43,905
So good to meet you too.
Just have the most fun.
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00:02:44,072 --> 00:02:45,573
You too.
All right, see ya.
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00:02:45,657 --> 00:02:47,742
- I live this way.
- Oh, yeah.
47
00:02:49,077 --> 00:02:51,496
Babe, please can you get dressed?
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00:02:51,663 --> 00:02:53,248
Do I have to come to the bris?
49
00:02:53,331 --> 00:02:56,143
My mom asked us to get there early,
so we could help her with the party.
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00:02:56,167 --> 00:02:58,420
Just tell her I'm sick. Please.
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00:02:58,503 --> 00:03:02,257
Oh come on, it won't be all bad,
the mohel, he's kind of famous,
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00:03:02,340 --> 00:03:03,508
he did Jake Gyllenhaal.
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00:03:03,675 --> 00:03:05,677
We go uptown to your family's
every weekend.
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00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:07,655
We were literally there 12 hours ago
for shabbat.
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00:03:07,679 --> 00:03:10,515
You have to come.
My mother got you almonds milk.
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00:03:11,891 --> 00:03:13,226
Guys.
57
00:03:14,394 --> 00:03:16,646
- Something really bad just happened.
- What?
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00:03:17,355 --> 00:03:19,316
- I ran into Augie.
- No.
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00:03:19,399 --> 00:03:21,109
Yeah, for the first time
in three years.
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00:03:21,192 --> 00:03:22,652
- How did he look?
- Great.
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00:03:22,736 --> 00:03:24,696
Yeah, he's in New York now,
I guess,
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00:03:24,779 --> 00:03:26,740
which I would know
if I hadn't unfollowed him.
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00:03:26,823 --> 00:03:29,659
And then I wouldn't have been
blindsided while wearing crocs.
64
00:03:29,743 --> 00:03:32,871
You know, no one ever talks about
the perils of not cyber stalking an ex.
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00:03:33,038 --> 00:03:34,331
And he has a new girlfriend.
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00:03:34,414 --> 00:03:37,167
What the fuck, Jim? Did you know
Augie had a new girlfriend?
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00:03:37,334 --> 00:03:39,294
No. I'm not his fucking biographer.
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00:03:39,461 --> 00:03:40,670
Yeah, he quit Politico
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00:03:40,837 --> 00:03:44,925
and he and Emily are gonna travel
America in a camper van.
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00:03:45,926 --> 00:03:47,135
Yeah, and I'm just wondering
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00:03:47,219 --> 00:03:50,263
what it says that he broke up with me
to pursue his career, which is fine.
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00:03:50,347 --> 00:03:53,767
But then he gave up his career
for this new, for this other person.
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00:03:53,850 --> 00:03:55,852
Okay baby girl,
do you know what you need?
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00:03:55,936 --> 00:03:58,981
My co-worker Eliza is having a barbecue
and you have to come.
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00:03:59,064 --> 00:04:02,192
- Gonorrhea Eliza?
- No. I told you not to tell anyone.
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00:04:02,276 --> 00:04:05,404
- Whatever, it's just gonorrhea.
- Anyway, she throws an awesome party.
77
00:04:05,570 --> 00:04:07,823
Babe, doesn't Eliza like,
party enough at work?
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00:04:07,990 --> 00:04:11,868
James, we work at Webster Hall, it's
a music venue, it's our job to party.
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00:04:12,035 --> 00:04:14,621
Sara, seriously, we promised my mom.
80
00:04:14,705 --> 00:04:18,041
And what about what Rabbi Esther said
last week about tikkun olam?
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00:04:18,125 --> 00:04:20,711
We need to like,
repair the wrongs in the world.
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00:04:20,794 --> 00:04:24,882
Darby needs me to tikkun olam her
with lots of free vodka.
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00:04:24,965 --> 00:04:26,925
You both are welcome to come.
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00:04:27,009 --> 00:04:29,219
I think I would rather go to a bris
than a barbecue.
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00:04:29,303 --> 00:04:32,181
Okay, you don't know what
you're saying, just go get dressed.
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00:04:32,264 --> 00:04:33,515
Okay.
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00:04:37,686 --> 00:04:40,439
Do you think that when Augie and I
were texting like,
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00:04:40,522 --> 00:04:44,943
he knew it was bullshit the whole time.
Was he just placating me with emojis?
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00:04:45,027 --> 00:04:47,071
Why do you always think of
the darkest option?
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00:04:47,237 --> 00:04:50,991
I don't know. I don't think he's like,
this freaked out about running into me.
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00:04:51,158 --> 00:04:52,242
Time for some medicine.
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00:04:52,326 --> 00:04:55,955
Look, what you need right now is
a good old-fashioned exorcism.
93
00:04:56,038 --> 00:04:58,791
But instead of the old priest,
it's a young hot guy
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00:04:58,874 --> 00:05:02,461
and instead of a cross, it's a dick.
Instead of holy water it's...
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00:05:02,545 --> 00:05:06,298
Whatever this catholic kink is,
please work out with Jim,
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00:05:06,382 --> 00:05:08,102
do some role plays.
Just leave me out of it.
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00:05:08,175 --> 00:05:09,593
Whatever metaphor you want to use,
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00:05:09,760 --> 00:05:13,180
it's time for mama to put on
her big girl pants.
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00:05:13,264 --> 00:05:15,349
- Am I mama?
- Yeah, mama.
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00:05:15,432 --> 00:05:19,937
- This?
- No. Mama. What?
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00:05:32,199 --> 00:05:33,701
Okay...
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00:05:34,118 --> 00:05:35,786
All right, there's guys here.
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00:05:35,870 --> 00:05:40,750
And a lot of basic girls so
you get in there my beautiful wierdo.
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00:05:40,833 --> 00:05:42,793
Whoa, I didn't know there'd be
movie stars here.
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00:05:46,589 --> 00:05:49,800
- That dude wants to hit it.
- That dude's wearing a gold chain.
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00:05:57,808 --> 00:06:02,146
This is fucked up. But I wish
Jim wasn't close to his family.
107
00:06:02,230 --> 00:06:04,941
- It's like constant.
- Yeah, it sounds abusive.
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00:06:05,108 --> 00:06:09,320
Look, if you went to as many brises
as I do, you'd feel the same way.
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00:06:09,404 --> 00:06:11,280
- I could like perform a bris.
- Oh my god.
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Right now, find me a baby dick and I'll
do it. I'll show you how it's done.
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00:06:14,826 --> 00:06:15,868
And he's always like,
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00:06:15,952 --> 00:06:19,080
"Why don't you hold this cute little
baby? It's so cute, hold it."
113
00:06:19,163 --> 00:06:21,791
And I'm like,
"I don't like the implications."
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00:06:21,874 --> 00:06:23,376
- The implications?
- Yeah.
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00:06:23,459 --> 00:06:25,128
That your boyfriend loves you
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00:06:25,211 --> 00:06:27,463
and maybe sees a future with you
that involves babies.
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00:06:27,630 --> 00:06:29,108
Darby, do not guilt trip me right now.
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I'm not, he sounds like a monster,
get away as fast as you can.
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00:06:34,304 --> 00:06:36,556
Mamala, where do you want me
to put the rugelach?
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00:06:36,639 --> 00:06:38,683
- Just over there on the sideboard.
- Okay.
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00:06:38,766 --> 00:06:41,519
It's a shame Sara couldn't come,
she loves my rugelach.
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00:06:41,603 --> 00:06:44,147
I know, but she got called into
a concert for work,
123
00:06:44,230 --> 00:06:45,815
but she sends her love.
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00:06:45,899 --> 00:06:46,983
You're killing your mother.
125
00:06:47,150 --> 00:06:50,361
Auntie DeeDee is kicking her butt
in the grandkids department.
126
00:06:50,445 --> 00:06:53,156
Okay dad,
but we're not really ready yet.
127
00:06:53,239 --> 00:06:55,742
Just have one now and we'll take care
of it until you're ready.
128
00:06:55,909 --> 00:06:57,368
Where is Sara?
129
00:06:57,535 --> 00:07:00,016
I made that kale salad she loves,
the one with the cranberries.
130
00:07:00,080 --> 00:07:02,499
She got called into a concert at work,
she sends her love.
131
00:07:02,665 --> 00:07:05,794
Sara's not here,
it's your cousin's bris.
132
00:07:05,877 --> 00:07:10,090
Folks! Sara my girlfriend,
she sends her love.
133
00:07:18,515 --> 00:07:24,187
Darby avoided mingling by stalking
Augie's new girlfriend on Instagram.
134
00:07:24,271 --> 00:07:28,608
And while years later, she would come
to understand the often large gap
135
00:07:28,692 --> 00:07:31,278
between the way people present
themselves on social media
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00:07:31,361 --> 00:07:33,738
and what their lives are really like,
137
00:07:33,822 --> 00:07:38,034
this stream of selfies simply made
Darby, to put it colloquially,
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00:07:38,118 --> 00:07:40,287
feel like shit.
139
00:07:41,413 --> 00:07:43,790
What's that? Oh, what, it's a party?
140
00:07:43,874 --> 00:07:45,435
People should put their phones away,
have a good time?
141
00:07:45,459 --> 00:07:47,586
Thanks, can you give me phone back?
142
00:07:48,170 --> 00:07:49,713
Sorry, I thought it would be cute.
143
00:07:49,796 --> 00:07:52,049
Okay, just don't take
other people's shit.
144
00:07:52,215 --> 00:07:54,468
Damn, all right, I said I'm sorry.
145
00:08:01,183 --> 00:08:02,476
Spin the bottle, wow.
146
00:08:02,559 --> 00:08:04,144
Hi, come here.
147
00:08:04,227 --> 00:08:08,774
This is definitely what you should be
doing right now. Yeah, he's cute.
148
00:08:08,857 --> 00:08:12,277
- Oh my god, he's so hot.
- Fingers crossed, good luck to you.
149
00:08:18,158 --> 00:08:20,327
- Okay.
- Have fun.
150
00:08:34,758 --> 00:08:36,135
All right.
151
00:08:37,052 --> 00:08:39,471
That's for you, friend.
152
00:08:39,930 --> 00:08:42,141
- This is fun.
- My lips are tingling.
153
00:08:42,891 --> 00:08:44,435
In a really nice way.
154
00:08:44,601 --> 00:08:46,895
Yeah, it seemed like
you were enjoying yourself.
155
00:08:48,147 --> 00:08:49,690
I mean, are you okay?
156
00:08:49,773 --> 00:08:52,693
No, I think I've gotta go,
I don't want Jim to feel bad.
157
00:08:52,776 --> 00:08:53,819
Sara, don't leave me here.
158
00:08:53,986 --> 00:08:57,781
You know what, you go forth
and you get on that dick wagon.
159
00:08:58,949 --> 00:09:01,109
- It is your destiny.
- Very upset by the 'dick wagon'.
160
00:09:01,160 --> 00:09:03,013
- Just giddy up and...
- Don't, I don't like the phrase...
161
00:09:03,037 --> 00:09:05,915
you just get on that little dick
wagon and you just...
162
00:09:05,998 --> 00:09:07,416
Stop, stop, stop.
163
00:09:07,499 --> 00:09:09,919
Just stay, have fun, live for me.
164
00:09:10,085 --> 00:09:13,672
Nice to meet you guys, see you later.
165
00:09:39,824 --> 00:09:41,742
Hey, what the fuck?
166
00:09:41,909 --> 00:09:43,411
Oh fuck, sorry. Can you not look?
167
00:09:43,494 --> 00:09:46,789
Sorry for intruding on your public
urination, which is a crime.
168
00:09:46,872 --> 00:09:48,457
Yeah, all right.
169
00:09:50,084 --> 00:09:52,128
Oh, fuck, there's a nail!
170
00:09:53,212 --> 00:09:56,132
- You okay?
- Yep, just cut myself.
171
00:09:56,299 --> 00:09:59,135
- Fuck, it's really bleeding.
- Let me see.
172
00:09:59,302 --> 00:10:01,179
It's fine, it's fine.
173
00:10:01,345 --> 00:10:02,930
Oh god.
174
00:10:03,097 --> 00:10:06,225
My apartment's right downstairs, I've
got some peroxide we can put on that.
175
00:10:06,309 --> 00:10:11,063
No I'm fine, I'm fine, I'll just go
find a towel or a napkin or something.
176
00:10:11,230 --> 00:10:14,233
- You gonna find a towel or a napkin?
- I don't know.
177
00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:18,571
Okay, yes. Can I get cleaned up, thank
you, that's a very sweet offer.
178
00:10:18,654 --> 00:10:20,281
- I'm Danny. Hi.
- Hi, I'm Darby.
179
00:10:20,365 --> 00:10:22,325
I'm the idiot who cut her leg.
180
00:10:23,284 --> 00:10:24,577
This is me.
181
00:10:25,620 --> 00:10:28,081
You better not try to murder me, okay.
I'm armed.
182
00:10:31,709 --> 00:10:34,337
Trying to blind yourself. Jesus.
183
00:10:35,755 --> 00:10:37,215
Hi.
184
00:10:37,298 --> 00:10:39,759
Ssh, baby's sleeping.
185
00:10:39,926 --> 00:10:41,261
Sorry, sorry.
186
00:10:41,427 --> 00:10:44,264
- Babes, you made it.
- Yeah, hi.
187
00:10:45,431 --> 00:10:47,976
What a wonderful surprise,
Jim said you had to work late.
188
00:10:48,476 --> 00:10:50,353
Oh yeah.
189
00:10:50,436 --> 00:10:55,650
Well, the entertainment industry,
just out there, saving lives.
190
00:10:55,733 --> 00:10:57,211
- Thanks for coming.
- You look pleased.
191
00:10:57,235 --> 00:11:00,447
Sara, can I get you something
to drink? I have your almond milk.
192
00:11:00,530 --> 00:11:02,699
Oh, you know what, I'm good thank you.
193
00:11:02,782 --> 00:11:06,828
I tell Jim every day, Sara,
you're the only thing he did right.
194
00:11:06,995 --> 00:11:09,122
I tell him that too Diane.
195
00:11:09,706 --> 00:11:12,334
Oh my gosh, how was the bris?
196
00:11:12,917 --> 00:11:14,798
Everyone except Todd
seemed to have a good time.
197
00:11:14,836 --> 00:11:17,088
- Great.
- Do you want to hold Todd?
198
00:11:17,255 --> 00:11:19,925
No, no, no, I don't want to,
I have to use the bathroom anyway.
199
00:11:20,091 --> 00:11:21,343
He loves being rocked.
200
00:11:21,509 --> 00:11:23,362
Well I was actually just gonna get
a plate first.
201
00:11:23,386 --> 00:11:26,473
- But you should hold the baby.
- I'll come back after. Stop.
202
00:11:28,475 --> 00:11:30,393
- Sorry.
- Fuck, fuck!
203
00:11:31,603 --> 00:11:32,854
All right.
204
00:11:37,734 --> 00:11:40,403
I don't think that's gonna scar but
205
00:11:40,570 --> 00:11:43,323
maybe put aloe vera on it for a week.
206
00:11:43,865 --> 00:11:45,659
Okay.
207
00:11:45,742 --> 00:11:47,285
- Thank you.
- There you go.
208
00:11:47,452 --> 00:11:50,956
- It still fucking hurts though, Jesus.
- I got Ibuprofen.
209
00:11:51,373 --> 00:11:54,751
Shouldn't take it on an empty stomach
though, you had food tonight?
210
00:11:55,210 --> 00:11:58,046
I had a bloody Mary
that had celery in it.
211
00:11:58,213 --> 00:12:01,883
Yum. How about I make you
a little plate, I got nice olives,
212
00:12:01,967 --> 00:12:03,260
I've got mozzarella.
213
00:12:04,511 --> 00:12:06,930
- Yeah, okay, that sounds good.
- Yeah? Great.
214
00:12:13,687 --> 00:12:16,565
So what's the deal with this
creepy empty room?
215
00:12:16,648 --> 00:12:19,776
I used to live here with my girlfriend
and when she broke up with me,
216
00:12:19,860 --> 00:12:21,904
she took all the furniture. So.
217
00:12:22,070 --> 00:12:26,700
I'm sorry, that sucks. Oh you got two
phones, so you're a drug dealer?
218
00:12:26,867 --> 00:12:29,077
That's actually a very hurtful
stereotype.
219
00:12:29,244 --> 00:12:31,371
I'm sorry,
I didn't mean to hurt your feelings.
220
00:12:32,664 --> 00:12:35,084
All right, here we go.
221
00:12:35,626 --> 00:12:38,212
Whoa, this is very artfully arranged.
222
00:12:38,378 --> 00:12:40,923
- This is amazing.
- I used to work at a deli.
223
00:12:45,552 --> 00:12:48,138
Good? Good? All right, come on, sit,
what do you want?
224
00:12:48,222 --> 00:12:50,724
The bed, the lawn chair,
you've got options.
225
00:12:50,808 --> 00:12:53,352
I guess that lawn chairs are better
for digestion.
226
00:12:53,435 --> 00:12:55,396
All right, lawn chair it is.
227
00:12:58,732 --> 00:13:00,859
Wow, dinner and a show.
228
00:13:01,026 --> 00:13:04,822
Sorry.
I get crazy OCD with the chin ups.
229
00:13:05,656 --> 00:13:07,741
How many do you do like, every day?
230
00:13:09,535 --> 00:13:12,454
Like 100.
Actually, like exactly, 100.
231
00:13:12,538 --> 00:13:14,623
- What?
- I've got a lot of nervous energy.
232
00:13:14,707 --> 00:13:16,750
- A 100?
- That's not that many.
233
00:13:16,834 --> 00:13:19,545
Ah no, when we used to do those
presidential fitness tests,
234
00:13:19,628 --> 00:13:22,506
I couldn't even do one. I would just
like get up there and just hang.
235
00:13:22,673 --> 00:13:24,800
- You can do a chin up.
- I absolutely cannot.
236
00:13:24,884 --> 00:13:27,053
Come on, now petite people
are very good at chin ups.
237
00:13:27,219 --> 00:13:28,540
That's a very hurtful stereotype.
238
00:13:28,596 --> 00:13:30,973
Come here and put that done
for a second.
239
00:13:33,309 --> 00:13:35,644
- I can't.
- All right, hop up.
240
00:13:35,728 --> 00:13:39,273
- Hop up, really?
- Okay fine, may I?
241
00:13:40,024 --> 00:13:43,861
There you go. One, you got one more,
you got one more.
242
00:13:44,028 --> 00:13:47,239
All right, sorry, you had to do an even
number or else the world will blow up.
243
00:13:47,323 --> 00:13:49,492
- Oh, is that how it works?
- There you go.
244
00:13:49,575 --> 00:13:51,577
Wow, your hair smells really nice.
245
00:13:51,661 --> 00:13:57,833
Oh, thank you. Yes, I have
this hair mask thing that I use.
246
00:14:10,805 --> 00:14:15,435
I can't even look at rugelach
without gaining ten pounds.
247
00:14:15,518 --> 00:14:18,855
Come on Ruth, you look like
you're about to blow away.
248
00:14:18,938 --> 00:14:21,250
Am I gonna have to force-feed you
some of this lox right here?
249
00:14:21,274 --> 00:14:24,360
Oh you really know how to make
an old broad's day.
250
00:14:24,527 --> 00:14:28,072
- How have you been?
- Oh, I'm hanging in there.
251
00:14:29,032 --> 00:14:31,034
- I redid the bathrooms.
- Okay.
252
00:14:31,200 --> 00:14:34,245
Although I don't know why, they're
gonna stick me in a home soon enough.
253
00:14:34,412 --> 00:14:36,831
Stop it, that is not true.
254
00:14:36,915 --> 00:14:39,709
I've been going downhill
since Richard passed.
255
00:14:39,792 --> 00:14:43,880
He was the real life in the house.
256
00:14:43,963 --> 00:14:48,259
Do you know I never cooked a meal
since two years into our marriage.
257
00:14:49,260 --> 00:14:52,055
He got so tired of my terrible cooking.
258
00:14:52,555 --> 00:14:56,434
He said one day,
"Step aside, this is my job now."
259
00:14:56,601 --> 00:14:58,269
Yeah I remember, you told me that.
260
00:14:58,436 --> 00:15:01,356
And he never made me feel guilty
about it.
261
00:15:01,439 --> 00:15:06,277
Yeah, he was a real winner.
55 years of marriage.
262
00:15:07,028 --> 00:15:10,323
I hope to have that with Jim one day.
263
00:15:12,367 --> 00:15:17,080
Sara, let him go if you don't want him.
264
00:15:18,248 --> 00:15:20,250
Life's too short.
265
00:15:21,751 --> 00:15:23,503
I love Jim.
266
00:15:26,506 --> 00:15:28,091
So, what do you do?
267
00:15:28,258 --> 00:15:30,552
I work at the Whitney Museum.
268
00:15:31,303 --> 00:15:33,346
Whoa. Fancy.
269
00:15:34,556 --> 00:15:36,558
- Yeah, I guess.
- My god.
270
00:15:36,641 --> 00:15:38,185
I'm a curator.
271
00:15:38,268 --> 00:15:42,731
Really? God, that's crazy.
You know I've never been there before.
272
00:15:42,814 --> 00:15:45,192
Never been to Ellis Island either,
I guess.
273
00:15:45,275 --> 00:15:46,526
Well, I'm a junior curator.
274
00:15:46,610 --> 00:15:49,290
Hey, you're the only person I know
with like, a fancy job like that.
275
00:15:49,321 --> 00:15:50,781
It's awesome.
276
00:15:52,032 --> 00:15:54,993
Yeah, I mean it's not a big deal.
What do you do?
277
00:15:55,160 --> 00:15:59,998
Long term, me and my cousin are
in the process of trying to start
278
00:16:00,082 --> 00:16:02,501
a bagel shop. So.
279
00:16:02,584 --> 00:16:05,253
Cool. I love bagels.
280
00:16:06,171 --> 00:16:08,340
You know, you're very beautiful.
281
00:16:08,423 --> 00:16:11,927
And look, sorry if I was a little
rusty, it's been a while since Bri.
282
00:16:12,010 --> 00:16:14,638
So how long has it been
since you guys broke up?
283
00:16:15,222 --> 00:16:16,807
Three years.
284
00:16:16,890 --> 00:16:19,643
- Okay. That's a long time.
- I know, I'm a freak.
285
00:16:19,726 --> 00:16:21,287
That's the deal
with the second phone by the way,
286
00:16:21,311 --> 00:16:24,815
it's got all her voicemails on it from
before she fell out of love with me.
287
00:16:24,982 --> 00:16:26,251
And I don't know how to transfer
the messages.
288
00:16:26,275 --> 00:16:30,362
So now I'm just paying for two phones
like a fucking tool.
289
00:16:30,821 --> 00:16:33,031
That's a sad story, Danny two phones.
290
00:16:33,574 --> 00:16:36,577
Danny two phones, I like that. Yeah.
291
00:16:36,744 --> 00:16:41,540
You should get rid of that phone,
you know. Like, it's holding you back.
292
00:16:41,623 --> 00:16:43,167
Like, start over, you'll feel better.
293
00:16:44,334 --> 00:16:48,130
Gosh, right.
What the fuck am I doing with my life?
294
00:16:48,547 --> 00:16:52,676
I should delete this shit,
I should just, I should move on.
295
00:16:52,760 --> 00:16:54,887
Yo baby,
I'm still stuck at work right now.
296
00:16:54,970 --> 00:16:56,889
No, no, no, no, don't do this.
297
00:16:57,056 --> 00:16:58,515
- Stay with me, come on.
- Oh man.
298
00:16:58,599 --> 00:17:00,893
Hey, listen, she's not coming back,
right?
299
00:17:02,895 --> 00:17:05,272
- You know what, fuck Brianna.
- Yeah, fuck Brianna.
300
00:17:05,356 --> 00:17:07,066
- Fuck Brianna.
- Never liked her.
301
00:17:07,149 --> 00:17:09,068
I'm throwing this shit out the window.
302
00:17:09,151 --> 00:17:11,362
Holy shit. Oh my god,
are you actually gonna do it?
303
00:17:12,446 --> 00:17:15,366
- Oh my god, is she doing this?
- Dude, I believe in you.
304
00:17:15,533 --> 00:17:17,785
Yeah, yeah, I'm gonna do it,
right, all right.
305
00:17:21,372 --> 00:17:22,414
Holy shit.
306
00:17:23,457 --> 00:17:26,752
Nothing but net!
I'm Danny fucking one phone now, baby!
307
00:17:26,836 --> 00:17:29,380
Yeah you are.
Oh my god!
308
00:17:29,547 --> 00:17:32,675
- How do you feel?
- God, I feel fucking great.
309
00:17:32,758 --> 00:17:35,177
- Yeah.
- I feel like a weight's been lifted.
310
00:17:35,344 --> 00:17:37,096
Yeah, good.
311
00:17:39,306 --> 00:17:42,393
Hey, do you believe in fate?
312
00:17:44,312 --> 00:17:47,982
Because I feel like I met you
for a reason.
313
00:17:48,065 --> 00:17:51,444
I mean, even at that party,
you stood out to me
314
00:17:51,611 --> 00:17:55,531
and I took the D train today,
I never take the D train. Never.
315
00:17:56,782 --> 00:17:58,343
What does the D train have to do with?
316
00:17:58,409 --> 00:17:59,744
D for Darby.
317
00:18:01,078 --> 00:18:03,748
- Oh, or D for Danny?
- No.
318
00:18:03,831 --> 00:18:04,999
Or dalmations or...
319
00:18:05,166 --> 00:18:08,461
No, I met you for a reason
and it's oh my god,
320
00:18:08,544 --> 00:18:12,256
it's crazy how your whole life
can change in a night.
321
00:18:16,135 --> 00:18:18,554
- Hey.
- Hey, I'll hold him.
322
00:18:18,638 --> 00:18:19,889
- Really?
- Yeah.
323
00:18:19,972 --> 00:18:22,892
- Okay, sit down there.
- Okay. You'll sit.
324
00:18:29,607 --> 00:18:31,484
- He likes to be upright.
- Okay.
325
00:18:31,567 --> 00:18:32,819
All right.
326
00:18:32,902 --> 00:18:34,988
Oh, he loves you.
327
00:18:37,073 --> 00:18:39,784
Oh my god babe, you look so hot.
328
00:18:39,867 --> 00:18:42,579
I gotta Instagram this, hold on.
329
00:18:42,745 --> 00:18:44,706
So cute.
330
00:18:50,712 --> 00:18:53,006
- Do you smell that?
- No.
331
00:18:53,173 --> 00:18:56,509
- For real?
- Yeah, I think he, I think he pooped.
332
00:18:57,469 --> 00:19:00,722
It's getting so late.
I know, I hate to...
333
00:19:00,805 --> 00:19:05,018
- All right, I understand.
- Yeah, and I have work in the morning.
334
00:19:05,101 --> 00:19:06,686
Right, right.
335
00:19:09,022 --> 00:19:11,483
Hey,
do you know Andrew Dice Clay?
336
00:19:12,150 --> 00:19:15,111
- No, who's that?
- Oh, he's this amazing comedian.
337
00:19:15,195 --> 00:19:17,906
He's got a show on Saturday
338
00:19:17,989 --> 00:19:22,118
and we could do dinner beforehand.
339
00:19:22,202 --> 00:19:24,972
And I got my cousin's car, 'cause
he's out of town for the whole month.
340
00:19:24,996 --> 00:19:29,000
So, you wouldn't even have to take
the train, I could swoop you, say yes.
341
00:19:29,084 --> 00:19:32,087
- Saturday's not good.
- Oh man.
342
00:19:33,588 --> 00:19:37,592
What about Friday? Friday's bucket hat
night at the Mets' game.
343
00:19:38,510 --> 00:19:40,095
You know what's so fucking crazy?
344
00:19:40,178 --> 00:19:44,349
This is so fucking crazy and I'm sorry
I didn't say anything before.
345
00:19:45,600 --> 00:19:49,688
I'm actually moving to Cleveland
on Monday.
346
00:19:49,771 --> 00:19:53,191
Cleveland? You're trading the Whitney
for Cleveland?
347
00:19:53,984 --> 00:19:58,405
Yeah, they, they offered me this big
job at the Cleveland Museum of Art
348
00:19:58,488 --> 00:20:03,660
and this party was kind of
my last hurrah in the city.
349
00:20:03,744 --> 00:20:09,124
I should have said something before but
I didn't want to ruin the kind of vibe.
350
00:20:09,875 --> 00:20:11,335
Damn.
351
00:20:13,211 --> 00:20:15,923
- Yeah I know.
- I finally met someone good.
352
00:20:16,506 --> 00:20:20,344
- I'm sorry.
- No, no, I mean, don't be sorry.
353
00:20:20,427 --> 00:20:22,387
No, I'm really glad I met you.
354
00:20:23,430 --> 00:20:26,517
Yeah, me too. Me too.
355
00:20:27,684 --> 00:20:29,394
I should really get going though.
356
00:20:29,561 --> 00:20:32,064
Let me at least give you a ride home,
my cousin's car a BMW.
357
00:20:32,147 --> 00:20:35,150
No, I'm like right by the subway so.
358
00:20:37,236 --> 00:20:38,904
Bye, Danny.
359
00:20:40,739 --> 00:20:42,783
Bye, my little Thumbelina.
360
00:20:45,035 --> 00:20:46,328
Bye.
361
00:20:57,298 --> 00:21:01,552
- Hey, good morning.
- Oh, you were up late.
362
00:21:01,635 --> 00:21:06,015
Yeah, things got interesting after
your spin the bottle dude.
363
00:21:07,641 --> 00:21:11,353
- Hey gals, care to join me on a run?
- No.
364
00:21:11,896 --> 00:21:14,940
All right, fine,
then I am listening to cereal.
365
00:21:15,482 --> 00:21:16,984
So how was it?
366
00:21:18,903 --> 00:21:22,656
I fucked the gold chain guy.
367
00:21:23,407 --> 00:21:25,618
Yeah, definitely a one-time thing.
368
00:21:26,452 --> 00:21:30,539
- What up, casual Darby.
- Yeah, one-time thing. One-time thing.
369
00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:32,708
I don't know,
370
00:21:32,875 --> 00:21:35,336
I got to be this whole other person
371
00:21:35,419 --> 00:21:38,381
and I told him that I was a curator
372
00:21:38,547 --> 00:21:41,592
and I like, inflated my whole life,
373
00:21:41,676 --> 00:21:45,096
'cause it felt really good to have
somebody look at me and think that
374
00:21:45,179 --> 00:21:49,308
I was so impressive
and just like, oh my god, wow.
375
00:21:49,475 --> 00:21:53,271
Yeah. Well, lying is a really powerful
self-help tool.
376
00:21:53,938 --> 00:21:58,109
Yeah. I also told him
I was moving to Cleveland.
377
00:21:58,776 --> 00:21:59,861
Oh my god.
378
00:21:59,944 --> 00:22:03,656
It was in self-defense. I was worried
he was gonna get obsessed with me.
379
00:22:03,739 --> 00:22:05,700
- Poor guy.
- Yeah.
380
00:22:06,033 --> 00:22:10,413
I mean, he'll be fine.
He got to fuck me. Like, he'll live.
381
00:22:10,496 --> 00:22:11,873
- True.
- Yeah.
382
00:22:15,251 --> 00:22:19,213
The encounter with Danny had boosted
Darby's wounded ego
383
00:22:19,297 --> 00:22:22,425
and given her a much needed bounce
in her step.
384
00:22:22,508 --> 00:22:25,678
She went on with her life
giving Danny very little thought
385
00:22:25,762 --> 00:22:28,348
as men had so often done to her.
386
00:22:36,564 --> 00:22:37,607
Shit.
387
00:22:39,359 --> 00:22:40,902
Darby?
388
00:22:42,195 --> 00:22:44,113
- Danny!
- Oh my god.
389
00:22:44,197 --> 00:22:45,782
- This... wow.
- Hi.
390
00:22:45,949 --> 00:22:47,408
Hi.
391
00:22:47,992 --> 00:22:50,537
What happened to Cleveland,
did you change your mind?
392
00:22:50,620 --> 00:22:53,498
No, no, I'm going...
393
00:22:55,917 --> 00:23:01,339
The apartment I was renting, like,
it's been so crazy.
394
00:23:01,422 --> 00:23:04,968
The landlord, you know.
395
00:23:05,051 --> 00:23:06,886
- Well you know.
- Yeah.
396
00:23:07,470 --> 00:23:08,680
Right?
397
00:23:08,763 --> 00:23:11,141
So are you the curator
of headhpones or?
398
00:23:11,224 --> 00:23:14,477
Yeah, just working, just...
399
00:23:15,311 --> 00:23:16,688
What are you doing here?
400
00:23:17,480 --> 00:23:20,358
After we met, I just kinda wanted to
check this place out.
401
00:23:20,442 --> 00:23:25,113
I know I don't really know you
but I still felt proud
402
00:23:25,196 --> 00:23:28,199
and I thought this might make me feel
closer to you
403
00:23:28,283 --> 00:23:33,038
even though I knew that you wouldn't be
here anymore. Except here you are.
404
00:23:33,204 --> 00:23:34,581
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
405
00:23:34,915 --> 00:23:36,208
It's wild.
406
00:23:37,209 --> 00:23:40,712
Hey,
do you wanna grab a bite after work?
407
00:23:40,879 --> 00:23:43,757
I have a dinner thing tonight,
408
00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:48,804
but I just remembered I have to grab
something from my cubicle.
409
00:23:48,887 --> 00:23:52,099
- But it was so good to see you.
- I get it, I'm not an idiot.
410
00:23:52,891 --> 00:23:55,102
- What do you get?
- You're lying.
411
00:23:55,268 --> 00:23:58,271
My whole family's liars, I can tell
when someone's lying to my face.
412
00:23:58,355 --> 00:24:02,609
- Is Darby even your real name?
- Yes, yes, it's Darby Carter.
413
00:24:02,693 --> 00:24:04,486
Okay, it's just...
414
00:24:07,572 --> 00:24:10,575
You're the first person I've touched
since Brianna.
415
00:24:10,659 --> 00:24:14,288
I'm sorry, that's a lot.
I don't, it was a moment.
416
00:24:14,371 --> 00:24:15,974
Haven't you ever been caught up
in a moment?
417
00:24:15,998 --> 00:24:18,875
I'm not a moment. I'm a person.
418
00:24:20,002 --> 00:24:22,754
And I helped you when you were hurt
and you like, what do you do,
419
00:24:22,838 --> 00:24:24,965
you used me like some kind of
sex robot.
420
00:24:25,048 --> 00:24:27,551
I thought guys wanted to be treated
like sex robots?
421
00:24:28,719 --> 00:24:31,054
Nice, that's really nice.
422
00:24:31,138 --> 00:24:34,016
I'm sorry this isn't a big deal.
423
00:24:34,183 --> 00:24:37,311
We slept together one time,
I don't owe you anything.
424
00:24:37,394 --> 00:24:40,147
I get to decide who I fuck
and who I love and whatever.
425
00:24:40,230 --> 00:24:43,525
Fine, you don't owe me anything.
But you still fucking hurt me.
426
00:24:44,693 --> 00:24:48,197
Darby Carter. Whoever you are.
427
00:24:50,741 --> 00:24:53,702
In truth she knew exactly how he felt.
428
00:24:53,786 --> 00:24:56,246
And she hated hurting him.
429
00:24:56,330 --> 00:24:57,998
Danny.
430
00:25:01,794 --> 00:25:03,420
I'm sorry.
431
00:25:09,426 --> 00:25:12,763
Still it was nice to know that
she could be the one who left.
432
00:25:13,764 --> 00:25:16,475
That she could be the one who got away.
433
00:25:17,726 --> 00:25:20,938
I think staying at a hotel defeats the
purpose of the whole campervan thing.
434
00:25:21,021 --> 00:25:23,274
I'm not talking about every night,
just like some nights.
435
00:25:23,357 --> 00:25:25,585
Like, every night in the van,
that's gonna be kind of intense.
436
00:25:25,609 --> 00:25:28,237
We're camping, of course it's intense.
437
00:25:28,904 --> 00:25:30,531
Get it. In tents.
438
00:25:30,614 --> 00:25:32,867
- Augie.
- So good.
439
00:25:32,950 --> 00:25:35,244
- Darby!
- Hey, guys.
440
00:25:35,411 --> 00:25:38,080
My god. I'm surprised you guys are
still in town.
441
00:25:38,164 --> 00:25:41,375
- Oh we leave tomorrow, actually.
- Trying to be in Taos by Labor Day.
442
00:25:41,459 --> 00:25:44,179
How's everything going with you Darb,
how's the Whitney or the Moma?
443
00:25:44,211 --> 00:25:48,132
The Whitney, it's great. But I've
actually gotta run, like, ironically,
444
00:25:48,215 --> 00:25:50,968
- I've got a job interview.
- Nice. What are you interviewing for?
445
00:25:51,052 --> 00:25:55,264
It's this assistant gig but it's in
an auction house which could be fun.
446
00:25:55,348 --> 00:25:57,558
- Cool. Good luck.
- Thanks.
447
00:25:57,725 --> 00:25:58,911
- Good luck to you guys.
- Thank you.
448
00:25:58,935 --> 00:26:00,937
So exciting,
tomorrow's the big launch?
449
00:26:01,020 --> 00:26:03,439
- Yeah, yeah. Out on the road.
- So exciting, bye.
450
00:26:03,523 --> 00:26:05,107
- Bye.
- See ya.
451
00:26:06,442 --> 00:26:08,694
Hi, I will have a tequila.
452
00:26:22,208 --> 00:26:25,378
Babe.
You gonna help me? Come on.
36942
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