Original subtitles

[TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING]

Hardly anyone's on board yet.

We'll have our pick of seats.

At least we'll have some control over who we're stuck with for three days.

[CHILDREN SCREAMING]

Next.

[SNEEZING AND COUGHING]

[BLOWING NOSE]

Don't wanna catch that.

[PLAYING PAN FLUTE]

Ugh, I'd rather catch the flu.

-[CHILDREN SCREAMING] -[FLUTE MUSIC PLAYING]

-[SNEEZING] -[BLOWING NOSE]

Oh, come on!

This guy looks pretty peaceful.

[EERIE MUSIC PLAYING]

We can really rest in peace in here.

Honey, hand me my book, please.

[STEPHANIE GASPS]

Hey, sorry.

My husband can be a bit of a klutz.

He doesn't mean to but sometimes he makes enough noise to wake the dead.

[EERIE GROWLING]

[BOTH GASPING]

[BLADE SWISHING]

[EERIE GROWLING]

Still beats the pan flute guy.

[BOTH SCREAMING]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

SCOOBY-DOO: Scooby-Dooby-Doo!

[BELL TOLLING]

Like, Scoob, we're finally gonna train you.

I rail against puns.

[BOTH LAUGHING]

This is great.

Traveling by train is like connecting with history.

The steam locomotive was developed in the 1700s.

But rail transport itself actually dates back to the 6th century BC.

[SIGHS] So my choices are

puns over here, arcane train facts here.

-And over here... -Hey.

Ow! Daphne is wearing a sleeping mask at a train station. Of course.

[SNIFFS] Wait, don't tell me.

The impatience, the complete and utter lack of any ability to hide irritation.

Fred's voice. [EXCITEDLY] It's Fred, right?

Yes, Daphne.

But let's circle back to wearing a sleeping mask at a train station.

Ah, I can hear, feel and... [LAPPING] Ugh, taste your confusion.

See, I'm systematically blocking off one sense at a time

in order to heighten the others.

Does that work?

[LAUGHS] Of course it does, Velma.

Sorry, no pets.

Your cat will have to ride in a crate in the luggage car.

SCOOBY-DOO: Huh? SHAGGY: Huh? No pets allowed on board.

Yes, here is my ticket, my good man.

What's in the bag?

I'm his clothes.

Like, this is an outrage!

My best friend locked up in here like... Like a dog.

It's pun karma.

[ENGINE CHUGGING]

[WHISTLE BLOWS]

[BOTH GROANING]

Okay! That's it!

I refuse to allow you to spend the entire trip back here

and I think you would agree that there's only one solution.

Indeed.

This wasn't the solution.

There, the finishing touch.

-Trust me, it's a perfect plan. How do you feel? -[SCOOBY-DOO GROANS]

Like making you soup.

Yes! The disguise is so good it actually brings out your maternal instincts.

Now we can join the gang upfront.

What about this pig sty?

[SHAGGY GROANS]

[TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING]

[SIGHS] Listen to that view.

Hey! I think this is working.

[SIGHS] Three days trapped in here without a mystery.

Oh, come on, Fred.

[SNIFFS] You smell way too frustrated.

I'm sorry, Daphne. I'm looking forward to the trip

but all I ask for is just one little tiny mystery.

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

The Grim Reaper's on board!

The Grim Reaper? Are you sure?

I mean, did you actually see him reap?

And how grim was he, like on a scale from one to 10?

I'd say about a nine. Eight and a half at least.

Yes! A mystery! Sweet, sweet, enigma of life and death.

Whoa, whoa, now let's all just take a deep breath here.

Our last breath, unless we stop this train.

We can't stop the train.

We're transporting delicate, time-sensitive medical supplies.

Hmm.

Look, I'm sure this is all just a misunderstanding.

Ah-ha! Yet the word "misunderstanding"

has five-sevenths of the word "mystery" in it.

Huh, his math is correct.

Folks, please just stay in your seats and don't worry.

Yes! We've got this!

You take your seat too, sir.

Me? [SCOFFS] Don't be silly.

The dark physical specter of mortality has returned

casting a shadow of doom over all on board.

That's totally my jam.

Sit.

[CRUNCHING]

[SCOOBY-DOO AND SHAGGY CHOMPING]

Can I help you?

Hi, like, my mother [GIGGLES]

and I were wondering if we can take some food back to our seats?

What do you say?

Please.

I'm sorry. Food service is not available yet.

[GIGGLES] Like, the coast is clear.

Wash your hands.

And your face.

[LOW GROWLING]

What's up, Scoob?

[SCREAMING]

BOTH: Towel mummies!

[GROWLS]

Yikes!

[BOTH GRUNTING]

[GROWLS]

[STRETCHING]

MUMMY: Ahhh!

[BOTH SIGHING IN RELIEF]

[TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING]

Hmm.

[WHISPERS] Now's our chance to check out where they saw the Grim Reaper.

Just follow my lead.

[WHISPERS] Cool and casual.

[LOUDLY] What?

She's wearing earplugs.

I'm sharpening my vision now!

Just keep moving.

-[WHISPERING] Don't draw attention... -[ALL SCREAMING]

What happened?

A mummy attacked us.

A mummy? You mean the Grim Reaper, right?

No, a mummy!

Bandages, skeletal, the whole nine.

[GASPS] You were attacked by an Olympic, rhythmic, gymnastic ribbon twirler?

Wow, you two really put up a fight.

SHAGGY: We didn't do this.

The mummy framed us.

Grim Reaper.

Though I can see how you could confuse him with a mummy.

A skeleton wrapped in cloth?

Please, a little credit.

What's this?

Hmm. This actually does look like authentic wrapping cloth from an Egyptian mummy.

But that would mean...

Two mysteries.

MAN: [IN DISTANCE] Monster!

Did you smell that?

It sounds like it came from the service car.

I guess we're about to find out which of these two monsters it really is.

[CLATTERING]

What the heck is that? Is that what attacked you?

Like, not even close.

Wait, I recognize that creature.

It's the legendary Japanese mountain goblin Tengu.

You're welcome.

Quiet. Maybe it won't notice us.

[LOUDLY] Quiet, maybe it won't notice us!

[SCREECHES]

[ALL SHRIEKING]

[ALL PANTING]

[CRASHES, SCREECHES]

[ALL WHIMPERING]

[SCREECHES]

[PANTING]

[SCREECHES]

Welcome aboard!

-Tengu. -You're welcome.

-[SCREECHES] -Ticket?

[SCREECHES]

I see your point.

Looks like a scalper.

Cut him some slack.

SHAGGY: Okay.

[METAL CLANGING]

But you'll have to comply with all safety regulations.

First, no sharp objects on the train.

[GRUNTS]

Tengu.

You're welcome.

[GRUNTS DISAPPOINTEDLY]

-[METAL CLANGS] -WOMAN: Ow!

Second, as my assistant just demonstrated,

if you do bring sharp objects on board, don't throw them randomly behind your back.

-Thank you. -He's right there.

Now in the event of a non-sharp object-throwing emergency,

calmly pull the lever on your left.

[GRUNTS IN PAIN]

Remain in crash position until you're notified the emergency has passed.

Well, that about covers everything.

Any questions, Tengu?

You're welcome.

[SHAGGY AND SCOOBY-DOO YELL]

[GROWLS]

[SCREECHES]

[ALL GASPING]

I thought I told you kids to stay out of this.

My heightened senses tell me something bad is happening on this train.

Plus, all the monsters. That's kind of a dead giveaway too.

Everyone onboard this train is in grave danger.

There seems to be at least three different mysteries here.

It's true. We have to stop this train.

-[DOOR OPENS] -ALL: Huh?

This train cannot stop.

Dr. Messmer here is in charge of the medical supplies

we're transporting for an experimental transplant surgery.

What kind of transplant? Heart? Liver?

Heart transplant? Liver transplant? [SCOFFS] Child's play.

That is if the child in question

has very permissive inattentive parents.

No! I'm pioneering a medical breakthrough so profound,

so advanced that not even I have the faintest understanding of it.

-[GASPS] -ALL: Huh?

Behold.

This singular nostril will be transplanted

on a desperate waiting mono-nostriloid patient.

Amazing.

You'll change the very way mankind looks at nose holes.

Exactly. And this train must arrive on time

or this nostril will die.

BOTH: Ahhh! Dead nostril!

Ah, speaking of which...

[SNORTING]

Oh, Doctor, you don't by any chance

have a medical grade nose plug, do you?

Hmm.

[ELECTRONIC BEEPING]

Wow, freaky.

I've never not smelled anything this much in my life.

Indeed. It's nice to finally meet a reasonable person on this train.

Oh, now, please. I must get back to my work.

-The nostril is running. -CONDUCTOR: Mmm-hmm.

So I'm going to tell you one last time.

Stop stirring up trouble on my train.

I wonder if these computer terminals

have access to all the information on this train.

-[ELECTRONIC BEEPING] -Anything?

Well, there's a passenger manifest

that tells us who bought tickets.

It looks like there's way more people onboard than bought tickets.

Like, so a bunch of people snuck onto the train? Why?

The kennels were uncomfortable.

Okay, we have to stop and regroup.

Let's take these three mysteries one at a time.

MAN: Another monster!

Okay, seriously?

[ALL SHRIEKING]

[GROWLING]

That's Tarasque, a mythical creature of French legend.

Four mysteries.

[GROWLS]

[GROWLS]

[ALL SCREAMING]

[ROCK SONG PLAYING]

Five mysteries?

Not six mysteries.

No, like, seven.

Seven mysteries?

[GROWLS]

[GROWLS]

Eight mysteries?

[SCREAMING]

What's going on here?

There you are.

We discovered a hoard of terrible creatures

who have snuck aboard this train.

We have to uncover each of their individual plots and stop them.

Agreed.

-[ALL GASPING] -Oh, no!

You're in big trouble.

-But it's true. -No!

As far as I can see, you're the only monsters

running around destroying this train.

I've contacted the authorities and they will be waiting for you

at our final destination when we arrive.

You're making a huge mistake.

Because of the trouble you caused

the rest of the passengers are demanding

that the train be stopped at the next terminal.

We cannot stop!

That will put an end to any hope of a successful nostril transplant.

You'll be setting nose related science back seven to eight days.

No!

Don't worry, Dr. Messmer.

I've convinced the passengers the real threat has been contained,

so we should still arrive on time.

I never believed I'd ever have cause to say these words

but you don't deserve to plug your nose.

No!

It appears the game is up.

All I wanted was one little mystery to solve.

One little mystery, not eight.

And I didn't even solve one of them.

I'm sorry, guys.

I guess it's what they say,

"Be careful what you wish for."

It's not your fault, Fred.

I've never seen so many monsters.

And from all over the world too.

Haniver the Rat Snake Demon from Belgium,

Tzitzimitl the South American demon monster,

Hemogoblin, I think he's from Idaho,

an Egyptian mummy,

Manticore, a legendary Persian creature.

SHAGGY: And Tengu.

You're welcome.

And let's not forget the Grim Reaper.

Actually, it's kind of morbid to dwell on him, huh?

Like, you know,

Scoob made me straighten up in here earlier

and we never came back.

How did it get ripped apart?

Looks like someone was looking for something.

Shh. Do you hear that?

-[ALL MUMBLING] -VELMA: Well, I don't hear anything.

-[RUSTLING] -There, that paper.

It's vibrating with the train. Don't you hear that?

[EXCITEDLY] It worked. My experiment worked.

My senses are heightened.

Great.

You can see, hear, smell and the taste the whole world

from your crap dog crate.

I'm telling you it's a clue.

[SIGHS] Right.

[GRUNTS]

[PANTS]

[GRUNTS]

[PANTING]

[PANTING]

[STRUGGLES]

Phew. [PANTS]

Phew.

Daphne, you're right! This is it.

Don't you see? It isn't a bunch of different unrelated mysteries.

It's one big mystery.

But there's still a piece missing.

Wait, Fred.

What you said before, "The whole wide world."

That's the missing piece.

But that means... Ugh...

We are going to have a lot of very unpleasant company.

[GROWLING]

[EVIL LAUGHING]

-We've got to get out of here now. -On it.

[METAL CREAKING]

[CLICKS OPEN]

Got it.

Great work, Daphne.

Velma, the computer terminal. You know what to look for.

We have about two minutes.

Scooby, you're the bait.

Hmm?

-[NERVOUSLY] Guys? -[FAINT GROWLING]

-[GROWLING] -[EVIL LAUGHING]

We need to go now!

ALL: Huh?

[FOOTSTEPS RUNNING]

MONSTERS: Huh?

[ALL GROWLING]

[SCREECHES]

Yikes.

[GROWLS]

Protect Scooby.

Hi, guys.

See, the solution to a mystery is like a light at the end of a tunnel.

Unfortunately, in this particular case...

[SCREAMING]

...that's not a metaphor.

ALL: Huh?

[FAINT GROWLING]

By Jove! Not a moment to spare. Prep the patient.

Nostril coming through.

Mind yourselves! Out the way, please!

I owe each and every one of you an apology

and a debt of thanks.

You see, I'm not really a train conductor,

I'm a government agent, Agent Conductor,

which is just a coincidence.

I was undercover on the train on a mission

to get a secret computer chip safely to the final destination.

Thanks to you kids, mission accomplished.

Pleasure to meet you, Agent Conductor,

but I think it's about time we met the other players in this game.

Who are you people?

CONDUCTOR: That's Tobor, an assassin from Belgium.

Which is why he chose Haniver the Rat Snake Demon of Belgium as his disguise.

CONDUCTOR: Ichi, we meet again.

No luck this time.

Yes, we guessed that each monster was an international agent

sent by their respective countries

to sneak on this train and steal the chip.

SHAGGY: So the chip was hidden inside the flower

I picked to help Scooby get in disguise.

CONDUCTOR: It was a special artificial flower

with a chip hidden inside it.

Then placed among the crates of flowers.

The only thing the agents knew was that they were looking for a flower as their target.

So naturally, sneaking on the train posed as monsters from each of their countries,

they all thought they could find the flower

and scare the passengers enough

that the train would be stopped and evacuated.

The manifest revealed there were more passengers than tickets sold.

So if the train got stopped and they checked the manifest,

it would look like all the passengers were off the train

and they could make a clean getaway

without anyone knowing they were there.

Just one problem. They couldn't find the right flower.

And once they realized the only flower left

was the one in Scooby's hat...

[GIGGLES]

They were all after my poor mother.

Aw, thanks, son. [GIGGLES]

I have to ask, what's on that chip?

What's worth all this?

There are some mysteries that you will never know the answer to.

Let's just say because of you kids,

the free world can rest easier tonight.

ALL: Hmm.

[SPEAKING FRENCH]

-AGENTS: Eh? -Meddling kids.

[MUMBLING IN AGREEMENT]

Oh, yeah, that they were.