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1
00:00:01,931 --> 00:00:05,065
Miss Leslie Knope,
I present to you Herb Scaifer.
2
00:00:05,083 --> 00:00:06,783
Again, Andy,
you don't need to bow.
3
00:00:06,834 --> 00:00:07,868
As you wish, ma'am.
4
00:00:07,902 --> 00:00:09,336
Okay, Herb,
what can I do you for?
5
00:00:09,371 --> 00:00:12,756
Well, please prepare yourself.
I have terrible news.
6
00:00:12,790 --> 00:00:13,641
You do?
7
00:00:13,675 --> 00:00:16,210
The world is going
to end tomorrow at dawn.
8
00:00:16,244 --> 00:00:18,795
Aw nuts.
You sure it's tomorrow?
9
00:00:18,846 --> 00:00:21,152
Afraid so.
Right at dawn.
10
00:00:21,153 --> 00:00:23,876
The entire planet...
11
00:00:25,071 --> 00:00:27,059
- Gone.
- Not giving me much notice, Herb.
12
00:00:27,060 --> 00:00:28,853
- Let me see what I can do.
- Okay.
13
00:00:28,953 --> 00:00:30,754
For a while in the 1970s,
14
00:00:30,755 --> 00:00:33,154
our town was run by a freaky cult.
15
00:00:33,655 --> 00:00:34,654
Every few years,
16
00:00:34,655 --> 00:00:37,154
the remaining members predicted
the world's gonna end.
17
00:00:37,155 --> 00:00:39,123
And they have an all-night
vigil in the park.
18
00:00:39,657 --> 00:00:41,258
It's super annoying.
19
00:00:41,293 --> 00:00:43,294
Turns out when you think
the world's ending,
20
00:00:43,328 --> 00:00:46,497
you don't aim so carefully
in the port-a-potties.
21
00:00:49,534 --> 00:00:51,134
♪ ♪
22
00:00:51,534 --> 00:01:01,134
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
23
00:01:06,792 --> 00:01:09,048
Tonight, the followers
of "Reasonableism"
24
00:01:09,049 --> 00:01:12,267
will be joining together to
await the return of Zorp.
25
00:01:12,268 --> 00:01:14,815
The giant lizard god who
will destroy the Earth
26
00:01:14,816 --> 00:01:16,616
with his cleansing
fire of judgement.
27
00:01:16,617 --> 00:01:18,592
Also light refreshments
will be served.
28
00:01:18,593 --> 00:01:21,173
Oh, last year they had pizza.
Are they gonna have pizza again?
29
00:01:21,174 --> 00:01:23,737
Uhm... says they've got
turkey sandwiches
30
00:01:24,174 --> 00:01:26,337
and the nectar
of a thousand sorrows.
31
00:01:26,338 --> 00:01:29,282
Oh, that is so good!
It's root beer and red wine.
32
00:01:30,743 --> 00:01:32,305
I went to one meeting.
33
00:01:34,392 --> 00:01:35,887
Wait!
34
00:01:36,826 --> 00:01:38,676
Gonna miss you,
enormous chair.
35
00:01:38,677 --> 00:01:41,896
- You really sat on this thing?
- Yes! I loved it.
36
00:01:42,566 --> 00:01:44,253
Felt like a tiny king.
37
00:01:48,344 --> 00:01:50,754
T-cup!
We did it, baby.
38
00:01:50,755 --> 00:01:53,126
We built a company
from the ground up.
39
00:01:53,127 --> 00:01:55,128
And the we ran it
back into the ground.
40
00:01:55,129 --> 00:01:59,036
The important thing to remember...
is that it was a massive success.
41
00:01:59,037 --> 00:02:00,760
Remy Martin?
44
00:02:04,400 --> 00:02:08,103
Along with pets.com,
Blockbuster and Askjeeves.
45
00:02:08,137 --> 00:02:10,271
My company is no better
than a company where you ask
46
00:02:10,306 --> 00:02:13,375
a fake butler
to Google things for you.
47
00:02:13,767 --> 00:02:15,294
Hello!
48
00:02:16,394 --> 00:02:19,090
So it looks like we'll each
end up with about $5,000 apiece.
49
00:02:19,091 --> 00:02:20,690
Stop.
50
00:02:20,691 --> 00:02:22,904
We get five g's each?
That's amazing!
51
00:02:22,905 --> 00:02:26,031
You started out with 450,000.
52
00:02:26,933 --> 00:02:29,861
Remember when DJ Bluntz made us
our own personal entrance beat?
53
00:02:29,862 --> 00:02:31,367
Remember the opening night party
54
00:02:31,368 --> 00:02:33,767
when you danced so hard
with Tess the recepcionist
55
00:02:33,768 --> 00:02:35,295
and you broke one of your ribs?
56
00:02:35,768 --> 00:02:37,895
It never healed properly.
57
00:02:37,896 --> 00:02:39,999
Every breath is agony.
58
00:02:41,433 --> 00:02:43,159
Stop.
59
00:02:43,160 --> 00:02:45,131
So what's next,
Tommy Davidson?
60
00:02:45,132 --> 00:02:46,899
I say we invest our ten large
61
00:02:46,900 --> 00:02:49,646
and then I "accidentally"
get run over by a city bus.
62
00:02:49,647 --> 00:02:51,735
and we start our own
hip-hop label.
63
00:02:51,736 --> 00:02:54,172
Listen, we could play it safe.
64
00:02:54,173 --> 00:02:56,310
But that's not what
e720 is all about.
65
00:02:56,311 --> 00:02:58,004
No, it is not.
66
00:02:58,005 --> 00:02:59,943
We have this place
for one more night, right?
67
00:02:59,944 --> 00:03:01,547
We're outtie tomorrow
at noon.
68
00:03:01,548 --> 00:03:04,895
What if we took
every dime we had left,
69
00:03:04,896 --> 00:03:06,619
threw one last party.
70
00:03:06,620 --> 00:03:09,431
Made it the essence of everything
we wanted the company to be.
71
00:03:09,432 --> 00:03:10,437
A party...
72
00:03:11,932 --> 00:03:13,137
For the end of the world.
73
00:03:13,138 --> 00:03:16,437
Shh! You had me at
"every dime we have left."
74
00:03:16,438 --> 00:03:18,873
Because I'm in
like Lara Flynn...
75
00:03:18,874 --> 00:03:21,623
Boyle... from "The Practice."
76
00:03:21,624 --> 00:03:25,883
Dilly dilly dilly
dilly dilly dilly dilly swag!
77
00:03:25,884 --> 00:03:29,036
Why does the cult call
themselves "The Reasonableists"?
78
00:03:29,071 --> 00:03:31,372
Well, they figure if
people criticize them
79
00:03:31,406 --> 00:03:32,473
it'll seem like they're
80
00:03:32,507 --> 00:03:33,808
attacking something
very reasonable.
81
00:03:33,842 --> 00:03:35,409
That's weirdly brilliant.
82
00:03:35,444 --> 00:03:36,844
Look, there's nothing
to worry about.
83
00:03:36,878 --> 00:03:38,913
They've said that the world
is going to end 15 times.
84
00:03:38,947 --> 00:03:40,264
And the only bad thing
that's ever happened
85
00:03:40,315 --> 00:03:41,849
on any of those dates is
86
00:03:41,883 --> 00:03:44,752
Lance Armstrong
dumping Sheryl Crow.
87
00:03:44,786 --> 00:03:46,571
- That was a tragic day.
- Hmm.
88
00:03:46,605 --> 00:03:48,456
Live strong.
89
00:03:48,490 --> 00:03:51,742
In any rate, I think Ben and I
should accompany you tonight.
90
00:03:51,776 --> 00:03:53,361
Oh, I don't think
we have to do that.
91
00:03:53,395 --> 00:03:54,895
No, no, no, I insist.
92
00:03:54,913 --> 00:03:57,765
These people
live on planet nutbrain.
93
00:03:57,799 --> 00:04:00,501
I live on planet nut bran.
94
00:04:00,535 --> 00:04:02,286
Bran and nuts are very
helpful for your colon!
95
00:04:02,337 --> 00:04:03,287
Well, it looks like
we're kind of forced
96
00:04:03,338 --> 00:04:04,905
to hang out with each other.
97
00:04:04,923 --> 00:04:06,791
Yeah, listen,
I'll--I'll come for a bit,
98
00:04:06,842 --> 00:04:09,110
but if it's okay with you,
I'm not going to stay.
99
00:04:09,144 --> 00:04:13,381
It's just, you know,
still kind of weird, right?
100
00:04:13,415 --> 00:04:15,216
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
101
00:04:15,250 --> 00:04:17,051
Yeah, yeah, yeah,
mm-hmm, totally get it.
102
00:04:17,085 --> 00:04:18,585
Definitely get it.
103
00:04:18,604 --> 00:04:20,104
Ben and I don't
hang out much these days.
104
00:04:20,138 --> 00:04:22,156
Big deal,
lots of people don't hang out.
105
00:04:22,190 --> 00:04:26,427
Jerry and April.
Obama and Madonna, probably.
106
00:04:26,461 --> 00:04:27,378
We're in good company.
107
00:04:28,781 --> 00:04:30,032
What should we do tonight?
108
00:04:30,066 --> 00:04:31,900
I don't know, I just figure
we'll just order some pizza.
109
00:04:31,951 --> 00:04:33,284
You watch me play Xbox,
110
00:04:33,319 --> 00:04:34,586
and then I could watch you
make some prank phone calls?
111
00:04:34,620 --> 00:04:36,020
We get hammered?
Make out?
112
00:04:36,055 --> 00:04:37,889
We do that every night.
113
00:04:37,923 --> 00:04:41,092
That's because repetition
is the key to a good marriage.
114
00:04:41,826 --> 00:04:43,562
Let's do something weird.
115
00:04:43,596 --> 00:04:45,380
Come on, it could be
the last night on earth.
116
00:04:45,414 --> 00:04:47,365
We could do something
off my bucket list.
117
00:04:47,399 --> 00:04:48,766
You have a bucket list?
118
00:04:48,801 --> 00:04:51,369
Catch the winning touchdown
at the super bowl.
119
00:04:51,403 --> 00:04:53,871
Make the most amazing
grilled-cheese sandwich ever.
120
00:04:53,906 --> 00:04:55,590
Win the lottery.
Ride a unicycle.
121
00:04:55,641 --> 00:04:56,472
Invent something.
122
00:04:56,843 --> 00:04:58,496
Fly first class on a plane.
123
00:04:58,497 --> 00:05:00,013
And when people are walking by,
124
00:05:00,497 --> 00:05:02,513
be like this:
125
00:05:04,042 --> 00:05:05,743
Go skydiving.
Outrun a hippo.
126
00:05:05,944 --> 00:05:08,200
I'd like to remake the movie
Kazaam with Shaquille O'Neal
127
00:05:08,201 --> 00:05:10,101
where he plays a genie
and I'd like to get it right.
128
00:05:10,102 --> 00:05:11,306
Teach my son
129
00:05:11,502 --> 00:05:13,306
to throw the perfect spiral.
130
00:05:15,862 --> 00:05:17,180
Have a son.
131
00:05:17,181 --> 00:05:19,219
All right, well, this
is what we're doing tonight.
132
00:05:19,303 --> 00:05:20,080
Wait, which one?
133
00:05:20,081 --> 00:05:21,947
We can change my cell phone plan.
134
00:05:22,781 --> 00:05:24,147
- That would be fun.
- No.
135
00:05:24,648 --> 00:05:25,645
This one.
136
00:05:25,648 --> 00:05:28,216
800, 900, 1,000.
137
00:05:28,234 --> 00:05:30,119
And how much
is left in the bank account?
138
00:05:30,153 --> 00:05:31,720
18 dollars
and four cents.
139
00:05:31,755 --> 00:05:33,722
Whoa!
Still a lot left over.
140
00:05:33,757 --> 00:05:38,059
Okay, you wanted to hold
$1,000 cash in your hands?
141
00:05:41,765 --> 00:05:45,233
That's super disappointing.
142
00:05:45,251 --> 00:05:48,921
998, 999, 1000.
143
00:05:48,955 --> 00:05:50,372
Yes!
144
00:05:50,406 --> 00:05:53,125
Now this is what I imagined!
145
00:05:55,512 --> 00:05:58,714
Have you ever seen this much
cash in your entire life?
146
00:05:58,748 --> 00:06:00,265
I just handed it to you.
147
00:06:00,300 --> 00:06:02,584
Nickels!
148
00:06:02,602 --> 00:06:03,585
I want nickels.
149
00:06:03,620 --> 00:06:05,554
- A billion nickels!
- No, Andy.
150
00:06:06,998 --> 00:06:07,976
Hey, Herb?
151
00:06:08,008 --> 00:06:09,976
- - Yeah? - Sorry to bother you.
- Yeah, sure.
152
00:06:09,977 --> 00:06:12,723
Leslie says you still need
to pay for the permit, it's $28.
153
00:06:12,724 --> 00:06:14,499
Oh, I'm sorry.
154
00:06:15,424 --> 00:06:16,499
Here's the check.
155
00:06:16,500 --> 00:06:18,746
You can cash that tomorrow.
156
00:06:20,302 --> 00:06:21,809
Evening, gentlemen, ladies.
157
00:06:22,110 --> 00:06:23,908
- Hey, Ron!
- Hail Zorp.
158
00:06:24,010 --> 00:06:24,709
How are you?
159
00:06:24,710 --> 00:06:25,709
I'm great.
160
00:06:25,710 --> 00:06:27,728
It is a beautiful night
for the end of the world.
161
00:06:27,762 --> 00:06:31,181
Congratulations to all of you
for reaching the finish line.
162
00:06:31,216 --> 00:06:33,484
The Zorpies are ridiculous.
163
00:06:33,518 --> 00:06:35,569
But, like the founding fathers,
164
00:06:35,604 --> 00:06:38,355
I believe in absolute
freedom of religion.
165
00:06:38,390 --> 00:06:42,092
Also their ceremonies require
the playing of flutes.
166
00:06:43,127 --> 00:06:46,230
I happen to make flutes
in my wood shop.
167
00:06:46,264 --> 00:06:48,632
Flutes are $80 apiece.
168
00:06:48,667 --> 00:06:50,534
And recorders are 150.
169
00:06:50,568 --> 00:06:53,437
Hey, they're beautiful.
170
00:06:53,471 --> 00:06:54,738
Would you take a check?
171
00:06:54,756 --> 00:06:55,924
Sure.
172
00:06:58,590 --> 00:07:00,224
Welcome to E720's
173
00:07:00,258 --> 00:07:02,142
end of the world celebration.
174
00:07:02,176 --> 00:07:04,478
The entire party's a VIP area.
175
00:07:04,512 --> 00:07:06,096
There's also
a double VIP area.
176
00:07:06,147 --> 00:07:07,898
A triple VIP area.
177
00:07:07,932 --> 00:07:09,983
And the Centurion Club
elite VIP area.
178
00:07:10,018 --> 00:07:11,318
Sponsored by Sobe Lifewater.
179
00:07:11,352 --> 00:07:13,287
- No one's allowed in there,
not even us. - Uh-uh.
180
00:07:13,426 --> 00:07:15,549
We have not one,
but six open bars.
181
00:07:15,550 --> 00:07:17,958
And best of all,
Snake Juice ice fountain.
182
00:07:17,959 --> 00:07:19,259
Show 'em, T!
183
00:07:19,260 --> 00:07:20,980
Juice is so chilled!
184
00:07:20,981 --> 00:07:22,265
Craps!
185
00:07:22,381 --> 00:07:23,265
Roulette!
186
00:07:23,266 --> 00:07:25,493
Ahrrr!
187
00:07:25,494 --> 00:07:28,446
Pirate ship bouncy castle
with bubbles.
188
00:07:28,447 --> 00:07:30,130
Shrimp wall.
189
00:07:30,131 --> 00:07:32,501
And special VIP
shrimp distributor
190
00:07:32,531 --> 00:07:34,701
Indiana Pacers' Center
Roy Hibbert.
191
00:07:36,560 --> 00:07:37,503
Is all you want me to do?
192
00:07:37,560 --> 00:07:39,203
Pass out shrimp
to people at the party?
193
00:07:39,204 --> 00:07:41,314
Yes, and stop
asking questions!
194
00:07:41,315 --> 00:07:43,593
Got a head?
Maybe you want a free Fedora.
195
00:07:43,594 --> 00:07:45,397
Wanna make out?
Go to out make out room.
196
00:07:45,398 --> 00:07:47,961
And before you leave,
don't forget the gift bag.
197
00:07:47,962 --> 00:07:50,333
Jean-Ralphio, there are animals
on the guest list tonight?
198
00:07:50,334 --> 00:07:52,128
Let me check, T.T.
Oh, just one.
199
00:07:52,629 --> 00:07:54,173
Bengal Tiger!
200
00:07:54,174 --> 00:07:57,408
We also hired ten huge, scary
bouncers with earpieces.
201
00:07:57,409 --> 00:07:58,831
- What up, Keith?
- Mmm.
202
00:07:58,832 --> 00:08:00,844
He actually once tossed me
out of a club three years ago.
203
00:08:00,845 --> 00:08:01,939
Water under the bridge.
204
00:08:02,045 --> 00:08:04,452
DJ Bluntz is mixing up
some new beats.
205
00:08:04,453 --> 00:08:07,296
Only 200 people will be admitted
to retain exclusivity.
206
00:08:07,297 --> 00:08:09,482
Ballers and ballerettes,
fasten your seatbelts.
207
00:08:09,516 --> 00:08:11,100
The perfect party begins...
208
00:08:11,134 --> 00:08:13,569
Clink! Now.
209
00:08:15,572 --> 00:08:17,239
Thank God.
210
00:08:17,774 --> 00:08:19,775
No one shows up
to a good party on time.
211
00:08:19,809 --> 00:08:21,277
If anybody actually
showed up right now,
212
00:08:21,311 --> 00:08:22,411
the whole party
would have been ruined.
213
00:08:22,445 --> 00:08:23,496
It would have been
a disaster.
214
00:08:23,530 --> 00:08:24,980
I don't want
to go to that party.
215
00:08:25,015 --> 00:08:27,917
Does the city consider them
a threat to public safety?
216
00:08:27,951 --> 00:08:30,036
Oh, not at all,
Shauna Malwae-Tweep.
217
00:08:30,180 --> 00:08:31,850
It's been over 30 years,
218
00:08:31,851 --> 00:08:34,769
since there's any incident
involving the Reasonableists.
219
00:08:34,770 --> 00:08:36,654
So I shouldn't interpret
anything from the fact
220
00:08:36,688 --> 00:08:38,689
that there are two people from
the city manager's office here?
221
00:08:38,723 --> 00:08:41,391
Well, nothing except that
I had nothing better to do.
222
00:08:41,410 --> 00:08:42,993
Which probably says
more about me than them.
223
00:08:43,028 --> 00:08:44,895
Thanks.
224
00:08:44,930 --> 00:08:46,897
- Thanks.
- Headline idea.
225
00:08:46,932 --> 00:08:48,632
"It's the end of the world
as they know it,
226
00:08:48,667 --> 00:08:50,234
but Pawnee feels fine."
227
00:08:50,252 --> 00:08:53,003
- It's a little long.
- Okay, "Zorp Shmorp!
228
00:08:53,038 --> 00:08:54,705
"Doomsday prediction
falls flat
229
00:08:54,739 --> 00:08:56,507
"as citizens spend
pleasant evening
230
00:08:56,541 --> 00:08:58,509
enjoying one of Pawnee's
finest parks."
231
00:08:58,543 --> 00:08:59,877
Somehow longer.
232
00:08:59,911 --> 00:09:01,178
Right, okay let's
go with the first one.
233
00:09:01,213 --> 00:09:03,431
Great, um, hey, also...
234
00:09:03,465 --> 00:09:05,415
He's cute.
Is he single, do you know?
235
00:09:05,434 --> 00:09:06,750
Chris? No.
236
00:09:06,768 --> 00:09:08,385
He's actually
dating Jerry's daughter.
237
00:09:08,419 --> 00:09:10,488
Oh, no sorry, I meant Ben.
What's his story?
238
00:09:11,422 --> 00:09:12,456
- Who?
- Ben?
239
00:09:12,991 --> 00:09:14,558
I-I don't know.
240
00:09:14,592 --> 00:09:17,478
I--I'm not s--
I'm not sure.
241
00:09:18,029 --> 00:09:19,763
He's, um,
a man and he's a worker.
242
00:09:20,281 --> 00:09:23,868
And he is--uh, we've never
discussed sex, so...
243
00:09:24,402 --> 00:09:26,904
It's--we've always just been
very businesslike, so...
244
00:09:27,238 --> 00:09:30,607
Your guess is as good--
nay, better than mine.
245
00:09:31,025 --> 00:09:32,609
The end.
By Leslie Knope.
246
00:09:34,227 --> 00:09:35,880
Okay.
Cool, thanks.
247
00:09:36,414 --> 00:09:37,948
H--happy to help.
248
00:09:38,683 --> 00:09:39,485
What's happening?
249
00:09:41,419 --> 00:09:42,553
The world is ending.
250
00:09:43,953 --> 00:09:45,687
Oh boy, I know how this goes.
251
00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:47,244
I know how Shauna operates.
252
00:09:47,278 --> 00:09:48,912
She smiles,
and then they fall in love,
253
00:09:48,946 --> 00:09:50,263
and then they get married,
254
00:09:50,298 --> 00:09:52,482
and then she changes her name
to Shauna Malwae-Wyatt.
255
00:09:52,516 --> 00:09:54,100
Or he's going
to be really progressive
256
00:09:54,135 --> 00:09:56,119
and change his name to
Ben Wyatt-Malwae-Tweep.
257
00:09:56,153 --> 00:09:59,105
God, I am so annoyed that he
would hypothetically do that.
258
00:09:59,449 --> 00:10:02,105
Okay...
Leslie, they're just talking.
259
00:10:02,106 --> 00:10:04,345
What do you mean "just talking"?
He's smiling.
260
00:10:04,346 --> 00:10:05,638
And she seems very charming.
261
00:10:05,639 --> 00:10:06,938
Is she more charming than me?
262
00:10:06,939 --> 00:10:09,635
Ann, if you say "yes",
I will kick you. I swear to God.
263
00:10:09,636 --> 00:10:10,971
You're definitely more charming.
264
00:10:11,170 --> 00:10:12,920
But I'm here
to remind you
265
00:10:13,054 --> 00:10:14,271
that the reason
you're not dating him
266
00:10:14,322 --> 00:10:16,223
is because you decided
to run for city council.
267
00:10:16,241 --> 00:10:18,058
Oh, so just because
I can't go out with him,
268
00:10:18,093 --> 00:10:19,393
someone else can?
269
00:10:19,411 --> 00:10:20,145
Oh, boy.
270
00:10:20,211 --> 00:10:20,945
- Wow.
- Okay.
271
00:10:20,996 --> 00:10:24,081
I'm sure
this is nothing.
272
00:10:24,815 --> 00:10:26,617
Okay, well, that was
definitely something.
273
00:10:26,668 --> 00:10:28,002
- Oh. My God.
- I know that move.
274
00:10:28,036 --> 00:10:29,119
They're gonna
have sex in five minutes.
275
00:10:29,170 --> 00:10:30,504
I've gotta stop this.
276
00:10:30,538 --> 00:10:31,872
I've got to keep them
away from each other
277
00:10:31,906 --> 00:10:32,740
for the rest of their lives.
278
00:10:32,758 --> 00:10:35,593
- How are you gonna do that?
- Unclear!
279
00:10:35,627 --> 00:10:39,213
Oh, yeah, ten bucks!
280
00:10:39,247 --> 00:10:40,381
That counts as
winning the lottery.
281
00:10:41,615 --> 00:10:44,018
Okay, now is this
the most amazing
282
00:10:44,052 --> 00:10:46,086
grilled-cheese
sandwich ever made?
283
00:10:46,104 --> 00:10:48,222
Mmm, it's pretty awesome.
284
00:10:48,756 --> 00:10:50,090
Honey, my bucket list
doesn't say
285
00:10:50,125 --> 00:10:52,826
"make a pretty awesome
grilled-cheese sandwich."
286
00:10:52,861 --> 00:10:54,161
Gotta go back to the store.
287
00:10:54,195 --> 00:10:55,663
We're gonna get
a different kind of cheese.
288
00:10:55,697 --> 00:10:56,780
No, no, no, dude, seriously.
289
00:10:56,815 --> 00:10:58,165
This is the most amazing
grilled-cheese sandwich
290
00:10:58,199 --> 00:10:59,233
ever made, okay?
291
00:10:59,267 --> 00:11:01,235
Okay. What's next?
292
00:11:01,269 --> 00:11:04,405
Hey, there you are.
Wow, you two are still talking?
293
00:11:04,439 --> 00:11:05,973
Ben hasn't bored you
to death by now.
294
00:11:06,007 --> 00:11:08,108
- Hey.
- So boring.
295
00:11:08,126 --> 00:11:09,876
Actually, we were having
a really great talk.
296
00:11:10,411 --> 00:11:12,279
- Keep your pants on.
- What?
297
00:11:12,314 --> 00:11:13,881
I mean,
keep your pants on, girl!
298
00:11:13,915 --> 00:11:15,516
I mean, those are
really nice pants.
299
00:11:15,550 --> 00:11:17,117
I really like your pants.
Where'd you get them?
300
00:11:17,152 --> 00:11:18,969
Do you want to go
buy some more pants?
301
00:11:19,004 --> 00:11:20,454
Or, um, walk away from here?
302
00:11:20,455 --> 00:11:22,459
Actually. I think I have
everything I needed here,
303
00:11:22,460 --> 00:11:24,544
but I might head over to
that end of the world party.
304
00:11:24,578 --> 00:11:26,246
Oh, that's where all
the losers are going.
305
00:11:26,280 --> 00:11:28,181
Yeah, what is that?
Tom emailed me.
306
00:11:28,215 --> 00:11:30,750
- I could check that out.
- Hurrrrr...
307
00:11:30,785 --> 00:11:33,453
Well, then you should
stay here then.
308
00:11:33,487 --> 00:11:35,188
Because you can't go.
309
00:11:35,222 --> 00:11:37,123
I mean, what if you're
not here when Zorp shows up?
310
00:11:37,158 --> 00:11:38,291
Boy, would your face be red.
311
00:11:38,326 --> 00:11:39,993
When Zorp shows up,
312
00:11:40,027 --> 00:11:44,597
your faces will be
melted off and used as fuel.
313
00:11:45,232 --> 00:11:46,499
You want to be here
for that.
314
00:11:46,534 --> 00:11:47,834
I think
I'll take my chances.
315
00:11:47,868 --> 00:11:50,487
Leslie, thanks as always.
316
00:11:50,521 --> 00:11:54,474
Wow. What an unbelievably
unpleasant person.
317
00:11:56,577 --> 00:11:57,861
Melissa, get in there
318
00:11:57,912 --> 00:11:59,279
- with your bad self.
- All right.
319
00:11:59,313 --> 00:12:00,914
- You ready?
- I'm ready.
320
00:12:00,948 --> 00:12:02,515
Anything you grab
is yours to keep.
321
00:12:02,550 --> 00:12:03,700
Hit it!
322
00:12:03,751 --> 00:12:05,485
Yes!
323
00:12:06,003 --> 00:12:08,421
The perfect party.
It's an elusive idea.
324
00:12:08,956 --> 00:12:10,373
People have to be
completely entertained
325
00:12:10,424 --> 00:12:13,293
from the moment they walk in,
to the moment they leave.
326
00:12:13,327 --> 00:12:14,928
It's a grand experiment.
327
00:12:14,962 --> 00:12:18,098
And I... am a party scientist.
328
00:12:18,132 --> 00:12:20,100
Welcome to my laboratory.
329
00:12:23,772 --> 00:12:27,232
So you were living here when
"Reasoneableism" first swep in?
330
00:12:27,233 --> 00:12:30,342
I was.
Lou Prozotovich, their founder,
331
00:12:30,343 --> 00:12:32,741
was an office supplies salesman.
332
00:12:32,742 --> 00:12:35,246
One day, he had an interesting idea.
333
00:12:35,247 --> 00:12:38,699
Maybe he can write a book to
help people organize their offices.
334
00:12:38,700 --> 00:12:40,308
"Organize it!"
335
00:12:40,700 --> 00:12:42,408
The book was a big success.
336
00:12:42,409 --> 00:12:45,609
Then Lou had another
interesting thought.
337
00:12:45,610 --> 00:12:50,762
Maybe there is a 28-foot tall lizard
with a volcano for a mouth
338
00:12:50,763 --> 00:12:53,106
- who controls the universe.
- That is interesting.
339
00:12:53,107 --> 00:12:54,102
So he wrote a second book.
340
00:12:54,103 --> 00:12:56,820
"Organize it 2:
Engage with Zorp"
341
00:12:56,821 --> 00:12:58,517
You know... could I have
a look at that?
342
00:12:58,518 --> 00:13:00,522
Well sure you can, Chris.
343
00:13:01,023 --> 00:13:02,396
You can keep it.
344
00:13:02,397 --> 00:13:05,645
I'd skip the first couple
of chapters if I were you,
345
00:13:05,646 --> 00:13:10,241
between you and me, it doesn't
really get good till Zorp shows up.
346
00:13:10,242 --> 00:13:12,259
Zorp is the lizard.
347
00:13:12,260 --> 00:13:13,967
What religion am I?
348
00:13:13,968 --> 00:13:18,112
Well, I'm a practicing none
of your [Bleep] business.
349
00:13:18,113 --> 00:13:19,965
- Okay, I'm ready!
- Good.
350
00:13:19,999 --> 00:13:22,634
Wait!
I'm not ready. Super scared.
351
00:13:22,668 --> 00:13:24,586
Andy, you said you wanted
to be an action star.
352
00:13:25,120 --> 00:13:25,921
This is your chance.
353
00:13:25,955 --> 00:13:27,157
Okay.
354
00:13:29,091 --> 00:13:31,910
Okay, you, Natalie,
follow the action.
355
00:13:31,945 --> 00:13:33,728
- Whatever
- What do I have to do?
356
00:13:33,763 --> 00:13:34,896
Just hold up this
butter knife to my throat
357
00:13:34,931 --> 00:13:36,097
and pretend like
you're holding me hostage.
358
00:13:36,131 --> 00:13:37,966
- What?
- Ready!
359
00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:40,485
I don't know.
It seems a little crazy.
360
00:13:41,320 --> 00:13:42,571
Just crazy enough to work.
361
00:13:46,742 --> 00:13:48,577
Aah!
362
00:13:48,611 --> 00:13:52,581
Ahh!
Oh, my face!
363
00:13:52,615 --> 00:13:53,615
My face!
364
00:13:53,649 --> 00:13:56,334
Is fine, Mikhail Petrov!
365
00:13:56,569 --> 00:13:58,787
Forget it, Macklin,
you're too late--
366
00:13:58,821 --> 00:14:00,822
- I'm sorry, guys.
- Jerry!
367
00:14:00,857 --> 00:14:02,357
I need my cheaters.
I cannot see anyth--
368
00:14:02,391 --> 00:14:03,675
You're doing really good,
you're doing really good.
369
00:14:03,709 --> 00:14:04,426
- Really?
- Yeah.
370
00:14:04,461 --> 00:14:06,628
Help me,
Agent Macklin, help me!
371
00:14:06,662 --> 00:14:09,130
He's stolen my jewels, and now
he's going to ravish my body
372
00:14:09,165 --> 00:14:11,049
and he stinks,
he really stinks!
373
00:14:11,100 --> 00:14:14,236
Okay, Janet Snakehole belongs
to mother Russia now.
374
00:14:14,270 --> 00:14:15,503
Oh, that's what you think!
375
00:14:15,521 --> 00:14:17,505
- No.
- I hope you like pain!
376
00:14:17,923 --> 00:14:19,024
Pow!
377
00:14:19,058 --> 00:14:20,192
Say the line.
378
00:14:20,226 --> 00:14:22,277
Looks like this Siberian husky
379
00:14:22,311 --> 00:14:24,779
is going to be Russian...
380
00:14:24,814 --> 00:14:27,482
off to jail.
381
00:14:27,916 --> 00:14:30,185
Hey, know what, can I go?
Gayle is making a roast.
382
00:14:31,519 --> 00:14:32,220
Ugh.
383
00:14:34,831 --> 00:14:36,431
♪ ♪
384
00:14:44,341 --> 00:14:47,109
That was Symphony for
the Righteous Destruction
385
00:14:47,143 --> 00:14:49,277
of Humanity in E minor.
386
00:14:49,312 --> 00:14:51,946
By the late Lou Prozotovich.
387
00:14:52,081 --> 00:14:55,117
Reminder. These flutes are
available for purchase.
388
00:14:55,151 --> 00:14:57,319
You can't take it
with you people.
389
00:14:57,353 --> 00:14:59,971
Herb, I just speed-read
both of your books.
390
00:15:00,006 --> 00:15:01,139
- Ooh.
- And, full disclosure,
391
00:15:01,174 --> 00:15:02,924
I think they're
bonkers-filled.
392
00:15:02,959 --> 00:15:04,926
But I did notice that you're
interested in reincarnation.
393
00:15:04,961 --> 00:15:06,461
Tell me about that.
394
00:15:06,496 --> 00:15:08,630
Well, it makes sense,
doesn't it?
395
00:15:08,664 --> 00:15:13,151
From the universe, we emerge.
Into the universe, we return.
396
00:15:13,186 --> 00:15:15,937
And there are infinite
forms we can take
397
00:15:15,971 --> 00:15:18,490
in infinite universes.
398
00:15:19,024 --> 00:15:20,141
What a lovely thought.
399
00:15:20,159 --> 00:15:24,312
Well, this morning at dawn,
you will take a new form.
400
00:15:24,347 --> 00:15:27,716
That of a fleshless,
chattering skeleton
401
00:15:27,750 --> 00:15:31,753
when Zorp the surveyor arrives
and burns your flesh off
402
00:15:31,787 --> 00:15:34,256
with his volcano mouth.
403
00:15:35,290 --> 00:15:36,725
That was very strange
what you just said.
404
00:15:36,759 --> 00:15:38,827
I don't like it as much
as that other thing you said.
405
00:15:40,361 --> 00:15:41,563
Oh.
406
00:15:42,098 --> 00:15:44,349
Hey, hey, where you going?
Where you headed off to?
407
00:15:44,383 --> 00:15:46,051
Do you want to play
a fun game with me
408
00:15:46,085 --> 00:15:47,636
that I made up
called chess-risk?
409
00:15:47,670 --> 00:15:50,672
It's half chess, half risk and
takes like 15 hours to play.
410
00:15:50,690 --> 00:15:52,374
Okay, yeah, I think
I'm gonna go.
411
00:15:52,408 --> 00:15:55,143
- I--okay.
- All right?
412
00:15:55,677 --> 00:15:57,579
- Oh, my God!
- What?
413
00:15:57,613 --> 00:15:59,564
I forgot I have a thing
I need to show you.
414
00:15:59,615 --> 00:16:01,316
Oh.
415
00:16:01,350 --> 00:16:03,118
I need to bring you there
right now it's so amazing.
416
00:16:03,152 --> 00:16:04,619
It's going to freak you out.
417
00:16:04,654 --> 00:16:06,788
It's, uh, it's something
that we need to
418
00:16:06,822 --> 00:16:09,357
get in my car and go to,
so let's do that.
419
00:16:09,375 --> 00:16:10,375
- Okay.
- Come on.
420
00:16:10,409 --> 00:16:11,327
Leslie,
where are you going?
421
00:16:11,328 --> 00:16:13,695
I'm going to the thing
that I told you about with Ben.
422
00:16:13,713 --> 00:16:15,130
No spoilers, Ann.
She's been there before.
423
00:16:15,164 --> 00:16:16,731
- Let's go.
- Okay.
424
00:16:18,084 --> 00:16:19,384
What's up, what's up?
425
00:16:19,418 --> 00:16:21,169
Are you guys having
a good time tonight?
426
00:16:22,872 --> 00:16:25,106
I think we've gotta take things
to the next level.
427
00:16:25,141 --> 00:16:26,241
Drum line, hit it!
428
00:16:29,262 --> 00:16:30,862
♪ ♪
429
00:16:45,235 --> 00:16:48,220
We've already been
down this street.
430
00:16:48,271 --> 00:16:49,271
Just out of curiosity,
431
00:16:49,290 --> 00:16:51,841
where's your favorite
place to go like ever?
432
00:16:51,875 --> 00:16:53,442
Well, I don't know.
433
00:16:53,477 --> 00:16:54,802
Tom's party
sounded kind of fun.
434
00:16:54,803 --> 00:16:56,387
Here we are!
We're at the special place!
435
00:16:58,274 --> 00:17:02,961
Well, here we are.
What do you think?
436
00:17:02,995 --> 00:17:05,830
Are you gonna murder me
and bury me at this gas station?
437
00:17:05,831 --> 00:17:07,699
No, this is
a great gas station.
438
00:17:07,733 --> 00:17:11,803
This gas station
was owned by... Mick Jagger.
439
00:17:12,537 --> 00:17:13,371
Uh-huh.
440
00:17:13,405 --> 00:17:14,622
I came across
some financial records
441
00:17:14,657 --> 00:17:16,124
when I was doing
some research for my book,
442
00:17:16,158 --> 00:17:17,642
and this gas station was owned
443
00:17:17,676 --> 00:17:20,144
by an M. Jagger, which at first
I thought was a woman.
444
00:17:20,179 --> 00:17:22,747
Maybe Meg or something,
but I think
445
00:17:22,781 --> 00:17:24,749
the most likely explanation
446
00:17:24,783 --> 00:17:27,986
is that legendary Rolling Stones
front man Mick Jagger
447
00:17:28,020 --> 00:17:31,289
owned this gas station
from 1951 to 1958.
448
00:17:32,034 --> 00:17:34,134
- When he was eight.
- Yeah.
449
00:17:34,135 --> 00:17:39,234
And I just knew you are a big fan
of financial records, so...
450
00:17:39,235 --> 00:17:40,535
you're welcome.
451
00:17:41,248 --> 00:17:42,783
I know what you're doing,
Leslie.
452
00:17:42,817 --> 00:17:45,352
I'm showing you a part
of Rock and Roll history.
453
00:17:45,886 --> 00:17:48,622
You--you can't do this.
You know we broke up.
454
00:17:49,356 --> 00:17:51,325
And I kind of feel like we
shouldn't...
455
00:17:51,859 --> 00:17:54,495
Hang out together,
just the two of us.
456
00:17:55,029 --> 00:17:57,064
Because every time we do,
it just makes it harder.
457
00:17:57,798 --> 00:17:58,766
You know?
458
00:18:00,051 --> 00:18:01,134
Okay.
459
00:18:03,387 --> 00:18:04,505
Okay.
460
00:18:09,820 --> 00:18:11,120
This one will get me arrested.
461
00:18:11,121 --> 00:18:12,970
And this other one is impossible,
462
00:18:12,971 --> 00:18:15,267
because we need Eddie Vedder
and a time machine.
463
00:18:15,268 --> 00:18:16,614
I think we've done
everything on the list
464
00:18:16,615 --> 00:18:18,272
that we can actually do, so...
465
00:18:18,273 --> 00:18:21,114
- Really?
- Yeah, I mean... this is it.
466
00:18:21,115 --> 00:18:22,699
What about this?
467
00:18:22,734 --> 00:18:24,818
Oh, my God,
that would be awesome.
468
00:18:25,252 --> 00:18:26,720
- It's impossible.
- No, it isn't.
469
00:18:27,254 --> 00:18:28,755
We have $1,000
in our bank account,
470
00:18:28,790 --> 00:18:29,990
and we're young
and irresponsible.
471
00:18:31,227 --> 00:18:32,226
I mean, our car
would break down.
472
00:18:32,260 --> 00:18:33,560
There's no way we
could even get there.
473
00:18:33,595 --> 00:18:35,862
So I'll steal my dad's car.
474
00:18:36,380 --> 00:18:38,999
Look, this is a stupid idea,
but right at this exact second,
475
00:18:39,033 --> 00:18:41,335
we have enough momentum
to do something stupid
476
00:18:41,369 --> 00:18:43,236
before we realize
how stupid it is.
477
00:18:43,270 --> 00:18:48,158
You are absolutely right.
No thinking, just stupid.
478
00:18:48,309 --> 00:18:49,376
Yes!
479
00:18:49,394 --> 00:18:51,645
Buddhists feel
that human beings
480
00:18:51,679 --> 00:18:54,348
are unlikely to be
reincarnated as human beings.
481
00:18:54,382 --> 00:18:56,817
So the problem
with reincarnation
482
00:18:56,851 --> 00:18:58,919
is that you could be
reborn as a pretzel.
483
00:18:59,553 --> 00:19:01,188
Or a socket wrench.
484
00:19:01,822 --> 00:19:02,823
Ron, if you could
be reincarnated,
485
00:19:02,857 --> 00:19:04,458
what would you like to be?
486
00:19:04,492 --> 00:19:07,294
Socket wrench sounds
pretty good, actually.
487
00:19:07,514 --> 00:19:10,483
I think the danger in
believing in reincarnation
488
00:19:10,517 --> 00:19:12,318
is that you spend so much
time trying to figure out
489
00:19:12,352 --> 00:19:14,020
what you're going to be
in the next lifetime
490
00:19:14,054 --> 00:19:16,489
that you forget to enjoy
the one you're in now.
491
00:19:17,023 --> 00:19:20,393
Ann Perkins...
that was beautiful.
492
00:19:21,298 --> 00:19:22,720
Let's go to that party
that Tom's having.
493
00:19:23,221 --> 00:19:24,620
Have some fun in the life.
494
00:19:25,320 --> 00:19:26,621
Sounds good!
495
00:19:28,020 --> 00:19:30,120
Wait. I wanna change my answer.
496
00:19:30,121 --> 00:19:32,120
I'll go with ball cutters.
497
00:19:42,720 --> 00:19:45,117
Maybe you'll reincarnate
into a good dancer.
498
00:19:46,376 --> 00:19:49,520
Ann Perkins, you dig me.
I love that!
499
00:19:53,820 --> 00:19:56,139
Tommy, this is the best
party I've ever been to.
500
00:19:56,140 --> 00:19:57,440
And I'm not just saying that.
501
00:19:57,441 --> 00:19:59,736
For real, T.T.,
think about it, man.
502
00:19:59,737 --> 00:20:03,120
Drum lines, personalized
gift bags, tigers.
503
00:20:03,121 --> 00:20:05,820
It's pretty great.
But it's not perfect.
504
00:20:05,821 --> 00:20:07,322
I mean, David Beckham
didn't show up.
505
00:20:07,323 --> 00:20:08,722
You knew that was
a long shot.
506
00:20:09,123 --> 00:20:10,720
Honestly, this is perfect.
507
00:20:11,121 --> 00:20:12,220
I guess.
508
00:20:12,735 --> 00:20:13,769
Tom.
509
00:20:14,304 --> 00:20:16,905
Hey, Lucy,
what are you doing here?
510
00:20:16,923 --> 00:20:18,573
Jean-Ralphio called me
and told me
511
00:20:18,591 --> 00:20:20,309
that this was
a very special occasion
512
00:20:20,343 --> 00:20:21,810
and I should come down.
513
00:20:21,845 --> 00:20:23,045
It's nice to see you.
514
00:20:23,079 --> 00:20:24,713
Yeah, good to see you too.
515
00:20:24,747 --> 00:20:25,848
Want to go dance?
516
00:20:25,882 --> 00:20:27,516
Yeah, yeah!
Uh, give me a minute.
517
00:20:27,550 --> 00:20:28,551
Okay.
518
00:20:30,085 --> 00:20:31,920
I can't believe
you called her for me.
519
00:20:32,455 --> 00:20:33,856
That's really nice
of you, man, for real.
520
00:20:33,890 --> 00:20:35,157
Thanks.
521
00:20:35,191 --> 00:20:36,925
No, no, no, thank you.
522
00:20:36,943 --> 00:20:38,529
I mean for everything.
523
00:20:44,984 --> 00:20:46,735
I actually forgot
they ever dated.
524
00:20:46,769 --> 00:20:48,571
I was trying to hit that.
525
00:20:49,605 --> 00:20:52,007
Dawn is nigh!
526
00:20:52,041 --> 00:20:55,077
Zorp the surveyor approaches,
527
00:20:55,111 --> 00:20:58,613
and all earthly debts
will be repaid
528
00:20:58,921 --> 00:21:01,970
to the original source
of life in the universe.
529
00:21:02,471 --> 00:21:04,520
Last call for doughnuts.
530
00:21:06,620 --> 00:21:09,020
What would you do
if the word was really gonna end?
531
00:21:10,620 --> 00:21:13,919
I'd go home,
drink some whisky.
532
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:16,119
Then I'd go
see my ex-wives.
533
00:21:16,120 --> 00:21:18,320
- Really?
- Yeah.
534
00:21:18,922 --> 00:21:22,020
I wanna watch them meet
their fiery end with my own eyes.
535
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:24,920
What would you do?
536
00:21:26,201 --> 00:21:28,219
Can I speak with you
about a personal matter?
537
00:21:29,253 --> 00:21:31,356
Normally, no.
538
00:21:31,390 --> 00:21:33,675
But... given there's
only 20 minutes
539
00:21:33,709 --> 00:21:35,560
until the end
of human existence...
540
00:21:35,994 --> 00:21:37,161
Also, no.
541
00:21:37,196 --> 00:21:38,763
I lost my mind tonight.
542
00:21:38,797 --> 00:21:42,667
I tried to screw up
even the potential of Ben
543
00:21:42,701 --> 00:21:44,001
dating someone else.
544
00:21:44,036 --> 00:21:45,770
Did you not hear me
when I said no?
545
00:21:45,804 --> 00:21:47,939
Oh, we broke up
because of me.
546
00:21:48,473 --> 00:21:51,609
But I have to
tell you, Ron...
547
00:21:53,545 --> 00:21:56,013
If the world
was ending tomorrow,
548
00:21:56,748 --> 00:21:59,083
I'd want to be with him.
549
00:22:00,118 --> 00:22:02,954
Well, that's significant.
550
00:22:02,988 --> 00:22:06,958
Problem is, Leslie, the world's
not ending tomorrow.
551
00:22:06,992 --> 00:22:09,394
The sun's going to rise
right over there.
552
00:22:09,928 --> 00:22:12,163
It'll be a regular Friday,
553
00:22:12,197 --> 00:22:14,832
and you'll be in the exact same
position you were in before.
554
00:22:15,867 --> 00:22:16,901
I know.
555
00:22:17,203 --> 00:22:19,243
I made my decision,
I need to stick to it.
556
00:22:20,121 --> 00:22:21,620
It's just the thought
of him with someone else
557
00:22:21,621 --> 00:22:22,920
is making me miserable.
558
00:22:22,921 --> 00:22:25,520
If it makes you feel
any better, Leslie,
559
00:22:25,521 --> 00:22:27,688
we'll all be dead
in 20 minutes.
560
00:22:28,620 --> 00:22:31,920
That does make me feel better.
Thank you, Herb.
561
00:22:31,921 --> 00:22:33,820
Guy's have ears
like a fruit bat.
562
00:22:47,108 --> 00:22:49,760
- We did it!
- Yay!
563
00:22:49,794 --> 00:22:51,278
This car is nice!
564
00:22:52,329 --> 00:22:53,613
How long you think
it'll take us?
565
00:22:53,664 --> 00:22:55,932
Uh, the map says 30 hours
but I drive really fast.
566
00:22:55,933 --> 00:22:57,300
- 30 hours?
- Mm-hmm.
567
00:22:57,734 --> 00:22:59,335
Oh, crap!
I didn't bring any music.
568
00:22:59,336 --> 00:23:01,370
- No!
- Your dad got anything good?
569
00:23:02,320 --> 00:23:05,620
Starlight Express, the
original cast recording, act 1.
570
00:23:05,621 --> 00:23:08,420
Who moved my cheese?,
Book on tape.
571
00:23:08,421 --> 00:23:10,620
- Next.
- Bobby McFerrin?
572
00:23:11,121 --> 00:23:14,220
No! We cannot listen Bobby McFerrin
for 60 hours of driving
573
00:23:14,221 --> 00:23:16,019
we'd murder each other.
574
00:23:16,204 --> 00:23:17,705
I'll tell you what.
575
00:23:17,739 --> 00:23:19,540
You play whatever you want,
576
00:23:20,074 --> 00:23:21,942
I'm just going to take
a real quick snooze
577
00:23:21,977 --> 00:23:24,011
for like 12 hours
so I'm fresh.
578
00:23:27,048 --> 00:23:31,518
♪ ♪
579
00:23:32,052 --> 00:23:33,220
Thank you guys
so much for coming out.
580
00:23:33,255 --> 00:23:34,888
If you're too drunk to drive,
581
00:23:34,906 --> 00:23:37,241
please take
one of our shuttles home.
582
00:23:37,275 --> 00:23:39,793
Valet service will drop
your car off later today.
583
00:23:39,828 --> 00:23:41,728
If you're one of
our designated drivers,
584
00:23:41,746 --> 00:23:43,364
please take a "thank you" bag.
585
00:23:43,398 --> 00:23:47,284
And enjoy the giant bows
I put on your car.
586
00:23:47,335 --> 00:23:49,303
- Hey!
- Hey.
587
00:23:49,337 --> 00:23:50,671
- It's great seeing you.
- You too.
588
00:23:50,705 --> 00:23:53,123
Are, uh, you sticking around
for a bit, or...
589
00:23:53,174 --> 00:23:54,808
Nah, I'm heading to
Bloomington right now.
590
00:23:54,843 --> 00:23:56,510
- Oh.
- Grad school's fun,
591
00:23:56,544 --> 00:23:58,629
but I do miss this town.
592
00:23:59,180 --> 00:24:01,215
- Yeah.
- What's wrong?
593
00:24:02,249 --> 00:24:03,217
I don't know.
594
00:24:03,251 --> 00:24:05,469
After this is done,
I'm gonna be broke,
595
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:07,321
and I'm not gonna
have a job.
596
00:24:07,355 --> 00:24:08,772
Well,
if it's any consolation,
597
00:24:09,307 --> 00:24:11,642
this was honestly the best
party I've ever been to.
598
00:24:12,493 --> 00:24:13,277
Hey, it was pretty great.
599
00:24:13,311 --> 00:24:16,397
I-I was really
aiming for something--
600
00:24:19,434 --> 00:24:23,404
I'll see you around.
601
00:24:23,438 --> 00:24:25,539
Whoo.
602
00:24:26,073 --> 00:24:27,409
You saw that.
603
00:24:28,743 --> 00:24:29,843
You saw that too.
604
00:24:34,316 --> 00:24:36,650
Shauna Malwae-Tweep
thinks you're cute.
605
00:24:37,185 --> 00:24:38,335
- What?
- That's why I took you
606
00:24:38,386 --> 00:24:39,786
to Mick Jagger's
abandoned gas station.
607
00:24:39,804 --> 00:24:41,221
Because she thinks you're
cute, and I was afraid
608
00:24:41,256 --> 00:24:42,556
you guys were gonna
make out and have babies,
609
00:24:42,590 --> 00:24:44,458
and I had no right
to do that to you
610
00:24:44,476 --> 00:24:46,477
or your future children.
611
00:24:46,511 --> 00:24:48,429
And it wasn't until just now
612
00:24:48,463 --> 00:24:50,764
that I realized
the romantic part
613
00:24:50,799 --> 00:24:53,534
of our relationship is over.
614
00:24:53,568 --> 00:24:55,402
So... I'm sorry.
615
00:24:55,437 --> 00:24:58,305
And, uh, why don't you tell
Shauna to make herself decent
616
00:24:58,340 --> 00:25:00,874
and I'll apologize
to her as well.
617
00:25:01,709 --> 00:25:03,946
Oh, well,
Shauna's not here.
618
00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:08,248
- Oh.
- See what I did?
619
00:25:08,283 --> 00:25:09,316
- I do.
- I'm very sneaky.
620
00:25:10,734 --> 00:25:12,152
Okay, okay, well....
621
00:25:12,187 --> 00:25:13,787
♪ ♪
622
00:25:46,020 --> 00:25:47,187
It's so much more beautiful
623
00:25:47,222 --> 00:25:48,722
than I could have
ever even imagined.
624
00:25:49,257 --> 00:25:50,858
Yeah.
625
00:25:51,292 --> 00:25:54,078
I'm trying to find a way
to be annoyed by it, but...
626
00:25:54,829 --> 00:25:56,130
Coming up empty.
627
00:25:56,564 --> 00:25:58,215
Thank you so much.
628
00:25:58,249 --> 00:26:01,001
I never would have ever
done this without you.
629
00:26:01,635 --> 00:26:02,603
Thank you.
630
00:26:07,058 --> 00:26:08,311
Where's all the faces?
631
00:26:09,558 --> 00:26:11,011
Like the presidents.
632
00:26:14,308 --> 00:26:16,505
Frankly, Leslie, I'm shocked.
633
00:26:16,675 --> 00:26:20,078
All the scholarly work
that I did on these texts
634
00:26:20,112 --> 00:26:22,914
indicated that
the world would end.
635
00:26:22,948 --> 00:26:25,016
Oh, gosh, I'm as disappointed
as you are, Herb.
636
00:26:25,050 --> 00:26:27,219
Yeah, but when the
world did not end,
637
00:26:27,350 --> 00:26:30,619
I went home and began
to reevaluate the texts.
638
00:26:30,753 --> 00:26:31,721
You don't say.
639
00:26:31,755 --> 00:26:35,624
And I realized that
I'd made some crucial errors.
640
00:26:35,658 --> 00:26:37,093
Well, math is hard.
641
00:26:37,127 --> 00:26:40,979
Yes, well, the actual end of the
world is six months from now.
642
00:26:41,392 --> 00:26:42,791
- Great!
- Yeah.
643
00:26:42,792 --> 00:26:45,291
- May 19th.
- Okay, let's see what we've got.
644
00:26:45,365 --> 00:26:47,933
Um, oh, on the 19th
we can't give you the park.
645
00:26:47,934 --> 00:26:51,186
We have a spring spectacular
free ice cream giveaway.
646
00:26:51,534 --> 00:26:53,186
Oh... Oh... look here.
647
00:26:53,237 --> 00:26:54,988
Heh! I misspoke.
648
00:26:55,023 --> 00:26:57,007
Yeah, it's May 20?
649
00:26:58,041 --> 00:26:59,009
That is free.
650
00:26:59,043 --> 00:27:00,443
- Ah!
- Okay.
651
00:27:00,477 --> 00:27:02,078
End of World, May 20th.
652
00:27:02,079 --> 00:27:02,891
That's great.
653
00:27:02,892 --> 00:27:04,891
Uhm... Oh, and could you
654
00:27:04,892 --> 00:27:08,591
put aside 10 tickets
for that ice cream thing?
655
00:27:08,692 --> 00:27:09,892
Already did.
656
00:27:10,275 --> 00:27:13,025
Sync & corrections by Alice
www.addic7ed.com
657
00:27:13,377 --> 00:27:16,053
Sync for WEBDL: VeRdiKT
[Addic7ed.com]
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