Original subtitles

♪ Zak Storm ♪

♪ Zak Storm, Zak Storm ♪

♪ I will always guide you, lead you ♪

♪ I'll be standing right by your side ♪

♪ Standing, fighting ♪

♪ Justice always in sight ♪

♪ I will always guide you, lead you ♪

♪ I will get you out of here ♪

♪ No reason to fear ♪

♪ Just as long as I'm near ♪

♪ Zak Storm, Zak Storm ♪

♪ I will always guide you, lead you ♪

♪ Heavens above ♪

♪ No reason to fear ♪

♪ Just as long as I'm near ♪

♪ Zak Storm ♪

[Clovis] Hurry up! If you don't zigzag, we'll get zapped!

Thanks for the moral support!

I didn't think it was possible to make a cloud angry.

[Zak] Lesson learnt! Cece?

Our only chance to lose it is to shift seas.

I'm searching for a vortex.

Hurry!

[Crogar] Wow! Oo-gah!

Crogar not like this ride!

That's the smartest thing you've said all week!

Stop moving so I can hide, you zetroflon! Oof!

[Caramba] Aargh!

[whining]

The Chaos is running out of energy!

I'll try to buy some time!

Calabrass, give me the Eye of Aeria!

Ooof! Argh!

Scratch that! Give me an eye that works.

-I can't see! -I think I can guide you.

-Incoming bolt. -I'm doing it! Hold on tight!

-Oh! -Argh!

Turn!

-Ha-ha-ha! -Yes! See?

Keep your alien hoo-ha. I've got Calabrass.

Zak, don't take back control! You turned my blade to--

Yeeargh!

Caramba!

[cloud] Aaaah!

[crackling]

[Zak] Hey, Ramba...

How's it going? You're not dead, so that's a win, right?

My exoskeleton is shorted out. The battery is badly wonkyated.

But I'm OK. Praise be the Great Calculator!

Oh! Hey!

OK is pushing it. What do we need to fix up your exosuit?

Well, I wouldn't say no to a little green crystallite.

[Cece and Calabrass] Crystallite?!

Wow, a double yell? I guess green crystallite is a big deal?

And how. Crystallite is a source of sensaxtional energy.

-It's found in the Sea of Dezer. -There is a problem.

Skullivar owns the only known crystallite mine.

Crystallite powers the Netherwhere.

It won't be the first time we've stolen from Skullivar.

-Where's the mine? -That's the second detail.

[Zak] It's a maze. We have to go through it.

I don't care. Mazes are fun.

What about minotaurs, lad? Do you think they're fun too?

Look at the size of it! Look at the horns!

They have a minotaur, we have Crogar - same big, same horns.

-Eh? -I know how the story ends.

-You can see into the future? -We studied this in school.

A tough guy beat the minotaur, then got out of the maze

by following a thread he laid out on his way in.

-It was a cool legend. -This minotaur is no legend.

Nobody has ever managed to overcome him

That's because nobody wasn't the 7Cs.

Oh, hold on. That sounded cooler in my head.

Zak's right. We can navigate the labyrinth using a line

and I have a crystallite detector-- Yee!

-Oh! -Just detect from over there.

Yeah. Yes, yes. Totalactally.

Don't w-- Argh! Don't worry!

[Zak] OK, so it's a maze. No biggie.

I can fly above it and find what we need.

I detect a force field over the maze.

If you fly above it, you'll get pulverox by lasers!

Definitely no flying.

I never knew you were a strategist, Zak,

even if you did borrow your strategy from a book.

I'll take that as a compliment, fish lips.

This is an important job, Clovis. Can you handle it?

Handle it?

I'm a master at sitting on the Chaos

and unspooling the rope upon which you're hanging the balance of your lives.

We're doomed.

Ha-ha-ha-ha!

-Argh! Oh! -Caramba!

False alarm. No proglemic. Everything's fine. Well, almost.

I find it hard to walk, but let's conquer this maze.

-Go, team! Yee! -Caramba, hold up!

Oh...

[roaring]

Oh...

-We planned for the maze, not-- -Skullivar's bone heads!

Er...you go first.

At last, action for Crogar! Crogar like!

Yaargh!

Yaa! Wow!

Save some for us, big boy!

[Zak] Hya! Haah!

[Zak] We're so boss.

[Calabrass] Do not discount the labyrinth.

We may never get out.

If skulls with no brains can get out,

we can, because we have brains.

[Zak] No offence, Cal.

[growling] [all] Oh!

[Cece] It is him!

It's the minotaur?

-Hey, big guy! Come and fight! -Bad idea!

[snarling]

[Calabrass] Maybe he got lost. [Cece] Unlikely.

Er...left or...not left?

I detect green crystallite over that-- Yeeargh!

-Which way? -My arm's wonky!

-That way? -Wait for it!

-Make up your tiny alien mind! -Argh!

I'm done walking. Sorry.

Caramba! His audio's down.

We've got you, buddy. Crogar, carry him.

He was going to say, "Go right."

To the left! Er...what did I miss?

A miracle. Zak is doing an exemplary job.

You wanted crystallite? Bam! You're welcome.

-Where? My scan shows nothing. -Your scanner be broke!

[Calabrass] No doubt about it. Here be fine pieces of crystal.

Guys, I'm serious. There's-- Argh! Nothing.

His battery! It is worse than we thought.

We'd better hurry! I don't want him trapped in a broken exosuit.

We'll dig out some... What?!

[Cece] The crystallite has disappeared. Amazing.

[Calabrass] The things you find "amazing!"

I told you the labyrinth was full of tricks.

Minor setback. Crogar, pick up Caramba.

We'll go back and try the other corridor.

I've never been so glad I paid attention in school.

Oh-oh!

-Is it another illusion? -I hope so.

If it isn't, we're lost!

Aaah! By the 15 chins of Vorg!

Hello? Friends? Captain Zak?

Aaah!

[Zak] I tell you, we went right, right, left.

I am sure it was port, port, starboard.

-Crogar lost. -[Calabrass] We're all lost!

If we had crystallite, we could ask Caramba.

There.

Wow! Crogar, you totally saved us!

[Zak] We'll get a stronger cable, then hit it again.

Oh! Ah! Ow! Gah!

Ha-ha!

No! Wait!

Oh! Look out!

-Aah! -Aaah!

Grr... Gah!

[Zak] Everybody OK?

[Cece] Except for a Viking armpit in my face, yes.

-Thank you Caramba. -Need lots gah! Energy.

Not hold on...for long.

Calabrass, give me the Eye of Beru!

[Zak] More illusions. They didn't mention illusions in the story.

A collective one. The labyrinth is trying to trap us.

Why isn't Caramba affected by the illusions?

He sees everything through his screen.

We can believe in Caramba's sensors.

Great plan, but zzzt! No more power.

Going to minimum life support.

-What does that mean? -I've got 15 millipnetz before--

How long is a millipnetz?

Caramba!

Hurry. Look for anything that glows green,

then cross your fingers it's not a trap.

Oh!

Do Crogar's eyes see what they see, or not?

I think this time, they do, Crogar.

Skullivar would post guards in the maze.

We don't have time. Calabrass, give me the me Eye of Dezer!

Hyaa!

Humph! Could have left one or two for Crogar.

Oh!

Go! Hyaa!

These skeletons are illusions!

Cece! No!

An Atlantean's instinct never fails.

Except all the times that it has so far.

I despise this maze! Aaah!

Hoo-ah! Yah!

-That one is real. -There will be more soon.

What do we do?

-[thump thump] -Shh! Listen!

Come on, this way!

[hammering]

We've found the mother lode of Skullivar's energy.

Crogar, we must be fast, but quiet.

I'll distract him. You sneak in from behind.

Er...hey!

[thump]

Hmm? What? You tell Crogar to put him on his back.

I told you to... Oh, forget it. Your way worked.

-This is what Caramba needs. -No!

Caramba specified only green crystallite.

-Or else what? -I don't know.

Nor do I, or how many millipnetzes he has left.

Red, green, I don't care! Power is power!

Yes! Caramba, can you hear me? Are you OK?

Are you OK? OK? OK?

Ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Zetroflon! That's not green crystallite! Ha-ha!

Yeah, but you're alive, with millipnetz to spare, right?

He is overheating! He is going into meltdown!

No! It's too late! If you take it out now, I'll explode!

[alarm sounds]

[Zak] Oh, what have I done?

[alarm sounds]

[hissing]

[all] Oh!

[hissing]

[Zak] Are these things real?

Do you mean the skeletons? Of course they're real!

Cece, Crogar, just worry about the skeletons.

-Hyaa! -Ya! Ya!

Wow! Aaah!

How can you tell the real ones from the fakes?

Do like Crogar. Bash them all! Ragnarok!

How do we stop you overheating?

I detect green crystallite not far away. Take me there.

[Caramba] I can reboot my cooling systalog.

Fall back!

How long before you overheat?

-Five minutes. -Is a minute a millipnetz?

No. A millipnetz is an hour. What gave you that crazy idea?

-Skeletons! Real or not? -Not!

Trust me! You have to trust me!

They looked really real!

Not to be a glopnotz, but if you'd trusted me on the Chaos,

we wouldn't even be here!

Close your eyes. Let me drive. I see a way through.

-[Calabrass] Close your eyes! -Oh!

[Zak] OK, I'm listening. What do I do now?

Turn left.

-Ouch! Be careful! -Be specific!

In human, not in alien.

I feel wind, lots of wind.

-Holy Moley! -Yeeargh!

[Zak] Wow!

[Caramba] Zak, you've got to trust me.

Close your eyes. I'll guide you.

Are you crazy? I can't go in blind!

To quote my great captain, "We have no time for this!"

-Give me the Eye of-- -Trust the space rat!

Otherwise, you'll waste my energy too.

That's what this accursed labyrinth wants.

Are you sure? It's not a glitch on your screen?

[sighs]

Don't let me fall, Caramba.

[Caramba] Now, ten centimetres to the left.

One step forward.

[Caramba] Go straight ahead.

-Two behind you! -Ah! Ah! One behind you!

We are going to be swamped!

Good! This was too easy for Crogar!

[Caramba] Four centimetres to the right. No, three.

[Caramba] That's good. Good. Two steps forward.

[Caramba] It's OK, Zak. You can stop.

Are we alive? We're alive!

Yeah! We made it!

I was a great driver on Wahool. Oh, but this one time...

Never mind! Save it for another time! Run!

-Aaah! -Caramba!

Where is the green crystallite?

Oh! There's green stuff under the pile!

[snarling]

[thumping]

These illusions are getting freakier!

-Rargh! -This one's not an illusion!

[Calabrass] Scuttle my sloop! It's the minotaur!

Rargh!

OK, that way!

Crogar not like labyrinth.

Oo-agh!

Rargh!

Oh, no! Zak!

[Zak] Gah! Aaah!

No!

Calabrass, give me the Eye of Dezer!

[roars]

Caramba, I need your eyes now.

Trust me. I'll guide you.

The real minotaur is to your right! Attack!

Hyaa! Aaah!

Five seconds.

Zetroflon! I'm exploding!

Yeeargh!

I'm not exploding? I'm not exploding!

Ha-ha-ha-ha!

Grrr!

Sorry, Zak, I'm all depleted.

Grrr...

The minotaur...

It's an exoskeleton! There's a pilot inside!

[Zak] Any chance it runs on a battery?

Er... There! Right between its nostrils!

Grr!

[Zak] Hyaargh!

[whining]

Grr!

That's the minotaur?

[squeals]

Nothing about this place is real except Skullivar's skeletons.

Zetroflon! Cece and Crogar! They're still out there!

-We must help them! -He'll help them.

[Cece] I fear our partnership has reached its end.

Delighted to have known you, Crogar.

[thump, thump, thump]

Crogar hear trouble. Trouble mean Zak.

This is much cooler than the minotaur story back home.

Nice work, Captain, but we still have to find our way out.

Easy, Your Highness. It's straight ahead.

[rumbling and crashing]

[Clovis] ♪ There's nothing so fun As sitting on a ship ♪

♪ With a rope in... ♪

-[crash] -Ohhh!

[Cece] It should be a while

before the microtaur finds a way out.

And Skullivar will be short of power for a while.

We have enough crystallite

to keep Caramba working for a million yarpnatz.

-That's not a word. -I'm having a Wahoolian moment.

-Don't ruin it. -Where to now, Captain?

I don't know. Let's let Caramba navigate for a little while.

Subtitles: TITRAFILM