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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:17,713 --> 00:00:18,881 >>> FROM ROCKEFELLER CENTER IN THE HEART OF NEW YORK CITY, 2 00:00:18,881 --> 00:00:23,185 IT'S "THE TONIGHT SHOW STARRING JIMMY FALLON." 3 00:00:23,185 --> 00:00:24,253 TONIGHT JOIN JIMMY AND HIS GUESTS, SETH MEYERS, DAVID 4 00:00:24,253 --> 00:00:25,387 BLAINE, MUSICAL GUEST, BURNA BOY AND FEATURING THE LEGEND 5 00:00:25,387 --> 00:00:33,595 DAY ROOTS CREW AND NOW HERE IS YOUR HOST, 6 00:00:33,595 --> 00:00:50,946 JIMMY FALLON ♪ 7 00:00:50,946 --> 00:00:55,079 >> HI, EVERYONE. THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR TUNING 8 00:00:55,079 --> 00:00:57,982 IN WELCOME TO THE TONIGHT SHOW. 9 00:00:57,982 --> 00:01:01,252 MY NAME IS JIMMY FALLON AND THERE'S THE ROOTS RIGHT THERE. 10 00:01:01,252 --> 00:01:03,754 ALWAYS GOOD TO SEE THE ROOTS LET'S GET TO THE NEWS AND 11 00:01:03,754 --> 00:01:06,657 JOKES. WELL, GUYS, THIS MORNING 12 00:01:06,657 --> 00:01:07,959 PRESIDENT TRUMP CALLED INTO FOX BUSINESS AND SPENT THE MAJORITY 13 00:01:07,959 --> 00:01:13,064 OF THE INTERVIEW ATTACKING DIFFERENT WOMEN. 14 00:01:13,064 --> 00:01:14,599 LISTEN TO THIS >> WHAT IS YOUR REACTION TO 15 00:01:14,599 --> 00:01:16,601 KAMALA HARRIS? >> NOW YOU HAVE SORT OF A MAD 16 00:01:16,601 --> 00:01:23,341 WOMAN, WITH HER. AOC WAS A POOR STUDENT 17 00:01:23,341 --> 00:01:24,308 THIS IS NOT EVEN A SMART STUDENT. 18 00:01:24,308 --> 00:01:27,178 SHE GOES OUT AND YAPS. NANCY PELOSI IS STONE COLD 19 00:01:27,178 --> 00:01:31,649 CRAZY. >> MAN 20 00:01:31,649 --> 00:01:33,050 LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE WOKE UP ON THE WRONG SIDE OF THE MY 21 00:01:33,050 --> 00:01:36,988 PILLOW MAD WOMAN, NOT SMART AND STONE 22 00:01:36,988 --> 00:01:39,890 COLD CRAZY YEAH 23 00:01:39,890 --> 00:01:41,292 HE'S TOUGH ON THE PHONE, BUT IF YOU REALLY HAD GUTS, HE WOULD 24 00:01:41,292 --> 00:01:46,397 SAY ALL OF THAT ON "THE VIEW." JUST TO DROP A CHERRY ON TOP OF 25 00:01:46,397 --> 00:01:47,698 THE MISOGYNY SUNDAY, TRUMP ALSO SENT A TWEET CALLING "MORNING 26 00:01:47,698 --> 00:01:54,805 JOE'S" MIKA BRZEZINSKI A DITSY AIR HEAD 27 00:01:54,805 --> 00:01:56,874 SERIOUSLY? IF YOU HAD A CO‐WORKER WHO CAME 28 00:01:56,874 --> 00:01:58,075 IN AND SAID THAT KIND OF STUFF ABOUT WOMEN, THEY WOULDN'T BE 29 00:01:58,075 --> 00:02:02,046 YOUR CO‐WORKER BY THE END OF THE DAY. 30 00:02:02,046 --> 00:02:03,014 IT'S LIKE, I'M JUST GOING TO GET MY COAT. 31 00:02:03,014 --> 00:02:06,884 SEE MYSELF OUT AT THIS POINT OUR BEST SHOT AT 32 00:02:06,884 --> 00:02:07,985 TRUMP ATTACKING COVID IS SOMEONE TELLING HIM THE VIRUS 33 00:02:07,985 --> 00:02:16,227 OVULATES [ LAUGHTER ] 34 00:02:16,227 --> 00:02:17,561 >> IF THE ELECTION DOESN'T WORK OUT, TRUMP CAN ALWAYS GET A JOB 35 00:02:17,561 --> 00:02:22,266 AS THE WORST HALLMARK CARD WRITER EVER. 36 00:02:22,266 --> 00:02:23,467 HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO MY SUBURBAN HOUSEWIFE 37 00:02:23,467 --> 00:02:24,669 PLEASE DON'T BECOME A COLD STONE, CRAZY, DITSY MAD WOMAN 38 00:02:24,669 --> 00:02:27,071 WHO GOES OUT AND YAPS. RIGHT NOW AOC IS LIKE, I DOUBLE 39 00:02:27,071 --> 00:02:33,177 MAJORED IN ECONOMICS AND INTERNATIONAL RELATIONS. 40 00:02:33,177 --> 00:02:40,518 YOU DOUBLE MIDDLE‐AGED IN ELEPHANTS AND LUNCH. 41 00:02:40,518 --> 00:02:41,552 [ LAUGHTER ] >> DESPITE ALL THAT, THE 42 00:02:41,552 --> 00:02:42,687 PRESIDENT'S CAMPAIGN NOW HAS A A WOMEN FOR TRUMP BUS THAT 43 00:02:42,687 --> 00:02:47,324 TRAVELS THE COUNTRY. LOOK AT THIS THING 44 00:02:47,324 --> 00:02:48,526 FUN FACT, THAT'S ACTUALLY THE OLD ACCESS HOLLYWOOD BUS WITH 45 00:02:48,526 --> 00:02:56,534 A NEW PAINT JOB. MEANWHILE THE WIENERMOBILE SAW 46 00:02:56,534 --> 00:03:02,940 THAT AND SAID, WELL, HELLO ALSO IN HIS INTERVIEW TRUMP 47 00:03:02,940 --> 00:03:04,108 DISCUSSED HOW DEMOCRATS WANT FUNDING FOR THE POSTAL SERVICE 48 00:03:04,108 --> 00:03:07,178 AND HE SAID SOMETHING KIND OF ALARMING 49 00:03:07,178 --> 00:03:09,480 LISTEN TO THIS >> THEY WANT $25 BILLION, 50 00:03:09,480 --> 00:03:13,551 BILLION, FOR THE POST OFFICE NOW THEY NEED THAT MONEY IN 51 00:03:13,551 --> 00:03:14,719 ORDER TO HAVE THE POST OFFICE WORK SO IT CAN TAKE ALL OF 52 00:03:14,719 --> 00:03:19,023 THESE MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF BALLOTS. 53 00:03:19,023 --> 00:03:20,891 IF WE DON'T MAKE A DEAL, THAT MEANS THEY DON'T GET THE MONEY 54 00:03:20,891 --> 00:03:22,393 THAT MEANS THEY CAN'T HAVE UNIVERSAL MAIL‐VOTING. 55 00:03:22,393 --> 00:03:28,599 THEY JUST CAN'T HAVE IT. >> OKAY. 56 00:03:28,599 --> 00:03:29,800 HE JUST ADMITTED THAT HE'S NOT AGREEING TO A DEAL TO FUND THE 57 00:03:29,800 --> 00:03:31,001 POSTAL SERVICE BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT MAIL‐IN VOTING TO 58 00:03:31,001 --> 00:03:36,807 BE POSSIBLE FOR THE ELECTION TRUMP IS LIKE ONE OF THOSE 59 00:03:36,807 --> 00:03:37,975 MOVIE VILLAINS WHO SPENDS SO MUCH TIME EXPLAINING HIS PLAN 60 00:03:37,975 --> 00:03:39,076 OUTLOUD THAT THE GOOD GUY MANAGES TO SHIMMY OUT OF HIS 61 00:03:39,076 --> 00:03:44,315 HANDCUFFS. FIRST, I'M GOING TO TAKE YOUR 62 00:03:44,315 --> 00:03:47,752 BODY, AND I'M GOING TO PUT YOU IN THE PA RAN IN A TANK. 63 00:03:47,752 --> 00:03:48,919 THEN I'M GOING TO GET A BUZZ SAW AND IT'S GOING TO COME ‐‐ 64 00:03:48,919 --> 00:03:56,160 HE'S GONE. [ LAUGHTER ] 65 00:03:56,160 --> 00:03:57,394 >> POSTAL WORKERS WERE LIKE HOW MUCH LESS FUNDING CAN YOU GIVE 66 00:03:57,394 --> 00:04:00,097 US WE DON'T EVEN HAVE PANTS 67 00:04:00,097 --> 00:04:04,335 [ LAUGHTER ] >> NO ONE IS HAPPY ABOUT THIS. 68 00:04:04,335 --> 00:04:05,569 MILLIONS OF AMERICANS WROTE TRUMP ANGRY LETTERS ABOUT IT 69 00:04:05,569 --> 00:04:11,776 BUT HE WAS LIKE, WEIRD, I DIDN'T GET ANYTHING. 70 00:04:11,776 --> 00:04:13,043 BUT THIS IS NICE WHEN HE FOUND OUT TRUMP WAS MEDDLING IN THE 71 00:04:13,043 --> 00:04:16,914 ELECTION HIMSELF PUTIN WAS LIKE, THEY GROW UP SO 72 00:04:16,914 --> 00:04:22,019 FAST SPEAKING OF THE ELECTION AFTER 73 00:04:22,019 --> 00:04:23,587 JOE BIDEN ANNOUNCED THAT KAMALA HARRIS WAS HIS VP PICK, THE 74 00:04:23,587 --> 00:04:28,659 TRUMP CAMPAIGN WAS QUICK TO RELEASE AN OFFICIAL STATEMENT. 75 00:04:28,659 --> 00:04:29,927 IT SEEMS LIKE THEY CAN'T MAKE UP THEIR MIND ON HOW TO 76 00:04:29,927 --> 00:04:32,563 CRITICIZE HER. CHECK OUT THIS AD. 77 00:04:32,563 --> 00:04:33,697 >> HEY, PROGRESSIVES, DO YOU REALLY WANT KAMALA TOUGH ON 78 00:04:33,697 --> 00:04:39,003 CRIME HARRIS AS YOUR VP? WE DIDN'T THINK SO 79 00:04:39,003 --> 00:04:40,137 AND, HEY, MODERATES, DO YOU REALLY WANT KAMALA NOT TOUGH 80 00:04:40,137 --> 00:04:44,041 ENOUGH ON CRIME HARRIS AS YOUR VP 81 00:04:44,041 --> 00:04:48,179 WE DIDN'T THINK SO EITHER. LOOK, HERE'S THE TRUTH 82 00:04:48,179 --> 00:04:50,047 KAMALA HARRIS IS A RADICAL SORRY IF THAT TRIGGERS YOU 83 00:04:50,047 --> 00:04:51,081 BUT AT THE VERY SAME TIME, SHE'S NOT NEARLY RADICAL 84 00:04:51,081 --> 00:04:55,186 ENOUGH DOUBLE TRIGGERED MUCH? 85 00:04:55,186 --> 00:04:56,387 KAMALA LOVES UNICORNS BUT SHE HATES HORSES WITH HORNING 86 00:04:56,387 --> 00:04:59,790 GROWING OUT OF THEIR HEAD. SHE THINKS KITTENS ARE CUTE BUT 87 00:04:59,790 --> 00:05:03,494 SHE THINKS THAT BABY CATS ARE OVERRATED. 88 00:05:03,494 --> 00:05:05,129 SHE'S THE YIN AND YANG SHE'S ANTI AND PRO SHE IS 89 00:05:05,129 --> 00:05:11,569 BORING AND SHE'S TOO SPICY BOTTOM LINE, KAMALA HARRIS IS 90 00:05:11,569 --> 00:05:12,570 TOO EXTREME AND/OR NOT EXTREME ENOUGH 91 00:05:12,570 --> 00:05:16,841 THIS AD BROUGHT TO YOU BY THE TRUMP CAMPAIGN FOR 92 00:05:16,841 --> 00:05:22,947 NONSELF‐CONFLICTING MESSAGES >> HARD TO UNDERSTAND. 93 00:05:22,947 --> 00:05:24,248 EVEN THOUGH TRUMP SPENDING HIS TIME CALLING INTO FOX, I'M SURE 94 00:05:24,248 --> 00:05:25,449 HIS ADMINISTRATION IS FOCUSED ON THE IMPORTANT ISSUES FACING 95 00:05:25,449 --> 00:05:30,387 OUR NATION, RIGHT? >> THE TRUMP ADMINISTRATION 96 00:05:30,387 --> 00:05:31,555 WANTS TO CHANGE THE DEFINITION OF A SHOWER HEAD TO LET MORE 97 00:05:31,555 --> 00:05:35,993 WATER FLOW PRESIDENT TRUMP TALKED ABOUT 98 00:05:35,993 --> 00:05:37,161 THE NEED TO KEEP HIS HAIR PERFECT AND COMPLAINED MULTIPLE 99 00:05:37,161 --> 00:05:42,399 TIMES THAT HE WAS NOT GETTING WET ENOUGH 100 00:05:42,399 --> 00:05:51,242 [ LAUGHTER ] >> WOW 101 00:05:51,242 --> 00:05:52,476 FIRST OF ALL, I JUST WANT TO APOLOGIZE FOR MAKING EVERYONE 102 00:05:52,476 --> 00:05:55,546 PICTURE TRUMP IN THE SHOWER. EVEN MORE UPSETTING, HE TOOK 103 00:05:55,546 --> 00:06:02,519 OUR TOP SCIENTISTS OFF VACCINE RESEARCH AND PUT THEM ON THIS. 104 00:06:02,519 --> 00:06:06,390 NOT GETTING WET ENOUGH IN THE SHOWER 105 00:06:06,390 --> 00:06:07,691 MEANWHILE, AMERICANS WERE LIKE, SHOWER HEADS, WE HAVEN'T BATHED 106 00:06:07,691 --> 00:06:11,695 IN FIVE MONTHS LET'S GET TO SOME BUSINESS NEWS 107 00:06:11,695 --> 00:06:13,564 AS MOVIE THEATERS ACROSS THE COUNTRY ATTEMPT TO REOPEN. 108 00:06:13,564 --> 00:06:15,299 AMC HAS COME UP WITH A WAY TO BRING CUSTOMERS BACK 109 00:06:15,299 --> 00:06:19,570 LISTEN TO THIS >> AMC HAS ANNOUNCED IT'S 110 00:06:19,570 --> 00:06:20,671 REOPENING ITS THEATERS NEXT WEEK AND TICKETS WILL BE 111 00:06:20,671 --> 00:06:31,482 15 CENTS ON REOPENING DAY. >> FOR 15 CENTS YOU CAN SPEND 112 00:06:31,482 --> 00:06:34,652 TWO HOURS IN FULL PANIC WONDERING IF IT WAS WORTH IT 113 00:06:34,652 --> 00:06:43,294 [ LAUGHTER ] >> AM I DOING THIS 114 00:06:43,294 --> 00:06:47,831 >> A DIME AND A NICKEL >> OLD PEOPLE ARE LIKE, WE'RE 115 00:06:47,831 --> 00:06:53,570 GOING TO GO TO THE MATINEE BECAUSE IT ONLY COSTS A DIME 116 00:06:53,570 --> 00:06:56,740 >> THE NICKELODEON >> THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT IT IS 117 00:06:56,740 --> 00:07:00,678 IS THIS WORTH IT ALL IT TAKES IS ONE PERSON TO 118 00:07:00,678 --> 00:07:03,080 GO ‐‐ I'M OUT. OKAY 119 00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:04,481 I'M GOOD I'M GOOD 120 00:07:04,481 --> 00:07:07,518 WHAT AM I DOING? MORE SERIOUS NEWS, PRINGLES IS 121 00:07:07,518 --> 00:07:16,193 NOW ‐‐ [ LAUGHTER ] 122 00:07:16,193 --> 00:07:17,294 >> PRINGLES IS NOW SELLING A A CHIP THAT TASTES LIKE 123 00:07:17,294 --> 00:07:18,395 A WENDY'S BACONATER AND THEY WANT PEOPLE TO DIP THEM IN 124 00:07:18,395 --> 00:07:26,904 THEIR FROSTIES THEY'RE ACTUALLY TRYING OUT 125 00:07:26,904 --> 00:07:28,973 SOME NEW SLOGANS FIRST THERE'S A PERSONAL 126 00:07:28,973 --> 00:07:30,507 PANDEMIC FOR YOUR INSIDES. NEXT THERE'S HONESTLY IT'S 127 00:07:30,507 --> 00:07:41,652 PROBABLY SAFER TO SWALLOW THE CAN. 128 00:07:41,652 --> 00:07:42,886 THEN THERE'S THEY DON'T EXPIRE BECAUSE THEY WERE NEVER OKAY TO 129 00:07:42,886 --> 00:07:47,291 BEGIN WITH NEXT THERE'S JUST TRY NOT TO 130 00:07:47,291 --> 00:07:48,425 THINK ABOUT HOW WEIRD OF A A COUPLE MR. PRINGLE AND WENDY 131 00:07:48,425 --> 00:07:52,796 ARE. AND FINALLY, ONCE YOU POP, YOUR 132 00:07:52,796 --> 00:07:57,668 HEART WILL STOP. JUST BE CAREFUL WHEN YOU'RE ‐‐ 133 00:07:57,668 --> 00:08:01,105 FINALLY THIS IS GOING VIRAL. THIS SKINNY HOUSE IN ILLINOIS 134 00:08:01,105 --> 00:08:05,609 WAS SOLD FOR $260,000. CHECK THIS THING OUT 135 00:08:05,609 --> 00:08:08,979 LOOK AT THIS LOOK AT THAT 136 00:08:08,979 --> 00:08:10,748 SEE IT AGAIN PUT IT UP AGAIN. 137 00:08:10,748 --> 00:08:14,685 YEAH IT'S A SKINNY HOUSE. 138 00:08:14,685 --> 00:08:17,087 YEAH WHEN YOU PUT YOUR MOUTH THROUGH 139 00:08:17,087 --> 00:08:18,188 THE FRONT SLOT IT JUST FLIES OUT THE BACK 140 00:08:18,188 --> 00:08:21,291 THAT HOUSE IS THE ONLY THING IN AMERICA THAT STAYED SKINNY 141 00:08:21,291 --> 00:08:24,194 DURING QUARANTINE. RIGHT NOW EVERY OTHER HOUSE ON 142 00:08:24,194 --> 00:08:25,062 THE BLOCK IS LIKE, WAIT, AM I FAT? 143 00:08:25,062 --> 00:08:30,134 YEAH, THE SIZE OF THE HOUSE JUST THREE FEET WIDE WHERE AS 144 00:08:30,134 --> 00:08:35,773 NEW YORKERS CALL THAT A PALACE WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW FOR YOU 145 00:08:35,773 --> 00:08:36,874 TONIGHT. FROM LATE NIGHT WITH SETH 146 00:08:36,874 --> 00:08:38,842 MEYERS, SETH MEYERS IS HERE TONIGHT. 147 00:08:38,842 --> 00:08:45,816 PLUS HE JUST ANNOUNCED HIS FIRST LIVE EVENT IN NEARLY A 148 00:08:45,816 --> 00:08:52,156 A DECADE, DAVID BLAINE IS HERE I CAN'T ‐‐ WAIT UNTIL YOU SEE. 149 00:08:52,156 --> 00:08:56,760 I CAN'T EVEN ‐‐ I CAN'T EVEN TALK ABOUT IT. 150 00:08:56,760 --> 00:08:57,861 IN THE SPECIAL, HE'S GOING TO ‐ 151 00:08:57,861 --> 00:08:59,063 HE WANTS TO FLY AWAY IN A HOT AIR ‐‐ HOLDING BALLOONS LIKE 152 00:08:59,063 --> 00:09:04,635 UP >> YEAH. 153 00:09:04,635 --> 00:09:05,769 >> HE'S GOING TO SEE IF HE CAN PULL THAT OFF, WEATHER 154 00:09:05,769 --> 00:09:07,304 PERMITTING WHAT HE DOES ON THE SHOW 155 00:09:07,304 --> 00:09:11,942 TONIGHT IS ‐‐ IT'S JUST ‐‐ I DON'T KNOW 156 00:09:11,942 --> 00:09:14,578 REMEMBER LAST NIGHT YOU ‐‐ >> THREW UP? 157 00:09:14,578 --> 00:09:15,779 >> YES, THREW UP THIS WILL ‐‐ 158 00:09:15,779 --> 00:09:17,314 >> TOP THAT? >> YEAH, YOU'LL FEEL LIKE 159 00:09:17,314 --> 00:09:18,515 YOU'RE RIGHT AT HOME WATCHING THE SAME ‐‐ IT'S HONESTLY ‐‐ 160 00:09:18,515 --> 00:09:27,091 HE'S UN ‐‐ HE'S UNBELIEVABLE THE GUY. 161 00:09:27,091 --> 00:09:29,026 >> HIS MAGIC IS REAL >> HIS MAGIC IS REAL 162 00:09:29,026 --> 00:09:31,095 AND WE HAVE GREAT MUSIC FROM BURN A BOY, EVERYBODY. 163 00:09:31,095 --> 00:09:34,798 RIGHT NOW, LET'S GIVE IT UP FOR THE BOOKS. 164 00:09:34,798 --> 00:09:48,579 ♪ >> IT'S THE END OF THE WEEK AND 165 00:09:48,579 --> 00:09:50,447 THAT'S WHEN I CATCH UP WITH PERSONAL STUFF 166 00:09:50,447 --> 00:09:55,018 CHECK MY INBOX, RETURN EMAILS AND SEND OUT THANK YOU NOTES 167 00:09:55,018 --> 00:09:58,622 I WOULD LIKE TO WRITE SOME THANK YOU NOTES RIGHT NOW, I 168 00:09:58,622 --> 00:10:01,391 HOPE THAT'S COOL WITH YOU GUYS CAN I GET SOME THANK YOU NOTE 169 00:10:01,391 --> 00:10:11,869 WRITING MUSIC, PLEASE? ♪ 170 00:10:11,869 --> 00:10:13,070 >> THANK YOU, KAMALA HARRIS, FOR BEING HALF‐JAMAICAN AND 171 00:10:13,070 --> 00:10:25,616 HALF‐INDIAN WHEREAS MIKE PENCE IS JUST HALF AND HALF. 172 00:10:25,616 --> 00:10:27,951 ♪ >> THANK YOU, JOE BIDEN, FOR 173 00:10:27,951 --> 00:10:29,153 ALWAYS LOOKING LIKE YOU JUST CAME FROM A TOP GUN AUDITION 174 00:10:29,153 --> 00:10:40,931 YOU THINK YOU TOTALLY NAILED NAILED IT. 175 00:10:40,931 --> 00:10:43,133 ♪ >> THANK YOU, WOMEN FOR TRUMP 176 00:10:43,133 --> 00:10:44,234 BUS, FOR LOOKING LIKE AN OPTIONAL ACCESSORY YOU CAN BUY 177 00:10:44,234 --> 00:10:56,346 FOR ALT‐RIGHT BLOGGER BARBIE ♪ 178 00:10:56,346 --> 00:10:58,749 >> THANK YOU, SHARK WEEK IN 2020, FOR MANAGING TO MAKE TV 179 00:10:58,749 --> 00:10:59,816 SHOWS ABOUT DEADLY SHARK ATTACKS FEEL LIKE A RELAXING 180 00:10:59,816 --> 00:11:11,094 ESCAPE ♪ 181 00:11:11,094 --> 00:11:12,196 >> THANK YOU, STUDY THAT FOUND THAT McDONALDS PACKAGING 182 00:11:12,196 --> 00:11:15,599 CONTAINS TOXIC CHEMICALS OR AS THEIR HAMBURGERS CALL IT, 183 00:11:15,599 --> 00:11:25,976 TWIN SEES. TWINSIES 184 00:11:25,976 --> 00:11:27,844 ♪ >> THANK YOU, BELUGA WHALE, 185 00:11:27,844 --> 00:11:29,079 BEING RESCUED THIS WEEK FOR LOOKING LIKE YOUR DRUNK FRIEND 186 00:11:29,079 --> 00:11:34,918 AT THE PARTY WHO NEEDED HELP GETTING HIS JACKET ON. 187 00:11:34,918 --> 00:11:38,989 THERE YOU HAVE IT. THOSE ARE MY THANK YOU NOTES 188 00:11:38,989 --> 00:11:39,938 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MORE "TONIGHT SHOW," EVERYBODY. 189 00:12:03,227 --> 00:12:04,094 ♪ >>> MY FIRST GUEST IS THE HOST 190 00:12:04,094 --> 00:12:05,062 OF "LATE NIGHT WITH SETH MEYERS" WHICH AIRS AT 191 00:12:05,062 --> 00:12:12,936 12:35 A. M. RIGHT HERE ON NBC DO I NEED TO SAY THAT TIME 192 00:12:12,936 --> 00:12:15,205 BECAUSE HE'S ON RIGHT AFTER US HERE IS OUR GOOD FRIEND, SETH 193 00:12:15,205 --> 00:12:21,311 MEYERS 12:35 IS WHEN YOU AIR? 194 00:12:21,311 --> 00:12:23,614 >> YEAH. JUST BECAUSE I THINK THERE 195 00:12:23,614 --> 00:12:27,117 MIGHT BE, LIKE, FIVE SECONDS BETWEEN YOUR SHOW AND MY SHOW. 196 00:12:27,117 --> 00:12:28,519 PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO SCHEDULE SOMETHING IN BETWEEN, MAKE SURE 197 00:12:28,519 --> 00:12:31,789 YOU'RE BACK AT 12:35 >> PEOPLE SETTING THEIR DVRs TO 198 00:12:31,789 --> 00:12:37,828 REMIND THEM WHEN YOU'RE ON AS OUR SHOW ENDS, YOU BEGIN. 199 00:12:37,828 --> 00:12:42,199 >> THE FIVE IS THE KILLER. IT'S BAD ENOUGH. 200 00:12:42,199 --> 00:12:44,802 I SAY THIS TO A MAN WHO IS ALSO ON AT 12:35. 201 00:12:44,802 --> 00:12:46,003 THE FACT THEY PUSHED IT TO 12:35 MAKES IT SOUND LIKE IT'S 202 00:12:46,003 --> 00:12:55,646 NOT REAL >> YOU'RE THIS CLOSE 203 00:12:55,646 --> 00:12:57,448 >> I HAVE A TV SHOW. >> YOU'RE CLOSE TO INFOMERCIAL 204 00:12:57,448 --> 00:12:59,883 TIME YOU VERSE SOME ‐‐ THE MY PILLOW 205 00:12:59,883 --> 00:13:05,022 GUY OR SOMETHING >> EXACTLY 206 00:13:05,022 --> 00:13:06,356 >> THE LAST NIGHT YOU WERE ON OUR SHOW WAS MARCH 5th, IS WHAT 207 00:13:06,356 --> 00:13:13,130 I'M REMEMBERING, FROM RESEARCH >> YEAH. 208 00:13:13,130 --> 00:13:15,532 >> AND IT WAS TWO WEEKS BEFORE 30 ROCK WAS SHUT DOWN. 209 00:13:15,532 --> 00:13:17,301 >> A WEEK BEFORE IT WAS A THURSDAY ‐‐ IT WAS 210 00:13:17,301 --> 00:13:21,872 A THURSDAY AND WE BOTH CANCELED THE FOLLOWING THURSDAY 211 00:13:21,872 --> 00:13:22,840 >> WE TALKED ‐‐ WE DIDN'T SHAKE HANDS. 212 00:13:22,840 --> 00:13:23,974 WE JOKED ABOUT NOT SHAKING HANDS AND THEN BY MISTAKE WE 213 00:13:23,974 --> 00:13:30,848 WERE DOING A BIT ‐‐ WE ENDED UP TOUCHING EACH OTHER'S FACES. 214 00:13:30,848 --> 00:13:32,349 >> WELL, I DON'T THINK IT WAS A MISTAKE. 215 00:13:32,349 --> 00:13:33,550 I LOOK BACK AND I THINK THE MISTAKE WAS THAT I WAS BEING 216 00:13:33,550 --> 00:13:39,590 VERY GLIB ABOUT WHAT TURNED INTO A PANDEMIC. 217 00:13:39,590 --> 00:13:40,791 AND I BELIEVE I WAS SAYING THAT YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TOUCH 218 00:13:40,791 --> 00:13:41,892 YOUR FACE, BUT NOBODY SAID ANYTHING ABOUT TEACHING EACH 219 00:13:41,892 --> 00:13:44,495 OTHER'S FACES WHICH IS LIKE HA‐HA. 220 00:13:44,495 --> 00:13:47,431 >> AND THE AUDIENCE LAUGHED. I LAUGHED AND AND THEN WE DID 221 00:13:47,431 --> 00:13:50,334 IT >> WE ALL HAD A GRAND OLD TIME 222 00:13:50,334 --> 00:13:52,836 WITH IT. >> BOY, WERE WE WRONG. 223 00:13:52,836 --> 00:13:58,709 >> YEAH. >> CUT TO FIVE MONTHS LATER. 224 00:13:58,709 --> 00:13:59,943 LET'S TALK ABOUT THIS BECAUSE YOU'RE DOING A GREAT JOB AT 225 00:13:59,943 --> 00:14:01,078 HOME AND, YOU KNOW, WE CAN ACTUALLY TALKING BECAUSE WE DO 226 00:14:01,078 --> 00:14:07,684 THE SAME JOB >> YEAH. 227 00:14:07,684 --> 00:14:08,719 >> WHAT WAS THE MOST CHALLENGING PARTS OF DOING THE 228 00:14:08,719 --> 00:14:11,321 SHOW FROM HOME FROM YOU? YOU HAVE TO DO EVERYTHING? YOU 229 00:14:11,321 --> 00:14:12,923 HAVE TO BE ‐ >> YEAH. 230 00:14:12,923 --> 00:14:14,124 IN THE BEGINNING IT WAS JUST FIGURING OUT, YOU KNOW, THE 231 00:14:14,124 --> 00:14:15,325 TECH OF IT AND WE ‐‐ WITH THINGS LIKE ‐‐ LONG SCRIPTS, WE 232 00:14:15,325 --> 00:14:16,527 FIGURED OUT A TELEPROMPTER APP BUT YOU HAVE TO SET THE SPEED 233 00:14:16,527 --> 00:14:29,873 IN THE BEGINNING AND YOU'RE MARRIED TO THAT SPEED. 234 00:14:29,873 --> 00:14:31,108 AND OBVIOUSLY THE SOURCE VIDEO CAN THEN BE EDITED BUT NOTHING 235 00:14:31,108 --> 00:14:32,309 IS WORSE THAN KNOWING THAT MY STAFF IS WATCHING ME WHEN I 236 00:14:32,309 --> 00:14:33,544 SCREW UP, LIKE BASICALLY WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE, WHAT THEY SEE IS 237 00:14:33,544 --> 00:14:49,193 ME GOING ‐‐ AND I HAVE TO LEAN FORWARD AND, LIKE, DO THIS 238 00:14:49,193 --> 00:14:52,362 >> YEAH, YEAH, YEAH. EXACTLY RIGHT. 239 00:14:52,362 --> 00:14:55,332 BUT ALSO, YEAH, IT CHANGES THE TEMPO OF YOUR JOKE READING TOO 240 00:14:55,332 --> 00:14:56,633 >> YEAH. I THINK WE'VE ALL FIGURED OUT, 241 00:14:56,633 --> 00:15:02,539 LIKE, YOU JUST GOT TO MOVE AHEAD A LOT FASTER 242 00:15:02,539 --> 00:15:03,740 IT'S NOT THAT ‐‐ I THINK THERE WAS A SENSE THAT WE'RE ALL 243 00:15:03,740 --> 00:15:10,414 WAITING FOR OUR LAUGHS THAT AREN'T THERE 244 00:15:10,414 --> 00:15:11,715 IT'S MORE JUST THAT WE'RE PROGRAMMED TO WORK IN FRONT OF 245 00:15:11,715 --> 00:15:13,817 AN AUDIENCE SO YOU DON'T WANT TO TALK OVER LAUGHS. 246 00:15:13,817 --> 00:15:16,320 YOU DON'T WANT PEOPLE TO MISS THE SETUP FOR THE NEXT JOKE. 247 00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:18,956 IT WAS LEARNING LIKE I DON'T THINK PEOPLE ARE LAUGHING SO 248 00:15:18,956 --> 00:15:24,728 HARD THAT THEY CAN'T HEAR THE LAST JOKE. 249 00:15:24,728 --> 00:15:28,232 >> THAT'S A GREAT WAY OF PUTTING IT 250 00:15:28,232 --> 00:15:29,499 THEY'RE LAUGHING THAT HARD THAT THEY ‐‐ NO, IT'S NOT THE WAY IT 251 00:15:29,499 --> 00:15:32,436 WORKS FOR THE TELEVISION ‐ >> WHEN YOU'RE ON AT 12:35, 252 00:15:32,436 --> 00:15:33,570 YOU'RE PROBABLY BEING WATCHED NEXT TO A PERSON WHO IS 253 00:15:33,570 --> 00:15:36,640 SLEEPING SO I DON'T THINK THEY'RE 254 00:15:36,640 --> 00:15:41,144 LAUGHING THAT HARD >> IT IS VERY ‐‐ IT COOLS YOU 255 00:15:41,144 --> 00:15:42,279 RIGHT DOWN WHEN YOU TELL A JOKE AND THERE'S NO RESPONSE, 256 00:15:42,279 --> 00:15:48,552 DOESN'T IT IT IS ‐‐ 257 00:15:48,552 --> 00:15:50,220 >> THAT'S THE GREAT THING ABOUT NO AUDIENCE. 258 00:15:50,220 --> 00:15:52,956 EVERYTHING PLAYS THE SAME, RIGHT? 259 00:15:52,956 --> 00:15:54,157 SO I THINK THE HARDEST THING IS WHEN YOU HAVE A JOKE PLAY TO 260 00:15:54,157 --> 00:15:59,062 SILENCE IN A ROOM FULL OF PEOPLE 261 00:15:59,062 --> 00:16:03,867 HAVING OPERATED NOW LIKE 60‐PLUS SHOWS WITH NO AUDIENCE, 262 00:16:03,867 --> 00:16:06,303 THE GOOD ONES SOUND JUST LIKE THE BAD ONES 263 00:16:06,303 --> 00:16:09,006 THEY'RE ALL ‐‐ >> YEAH, YEAH. 264 00:16:09,006 --> 00:16:11,508 THAT WAS A CRUSHER JOKE. >> NOTHING 265 00:16:11,508 --> 00:16:14,044 >> NOTHING STILL. 266 00:16:14,044 --> 00:16:16,313 NOTHING. OF COURSE THERE'S NO AUDIO 267 00:16:16,313 --> 00:16:17,547 >> I THINK THERE'S TWO WAYS OF LOOKING, MAN, I HAVEN'T HAD 268 00:16:17,547 --> 00:16:18,715 A LAUGH FOR FOUR MONTHS OR YOU CAN JUST SAY, LIKE, I'M ON A 269 00:16:18,715 --> 00:16:25,289 A ROLL EVERYTHING IS EXACTLY THE SAME 270 00:16:25,289 --> 00:16:27,057 >> ONE AFTER THE OTHER >> CONSISTENCY, WELL DONE, 271 00:16:27,057 --> 00:16:30,227 JIMMY. I LOVE ‐‐ THIS IS YOUR SECOND 272 00:16:30,227 --> 00:16:31,962 LOCATION I LOVE THE SET NOW OF YOUR ‐ 273 00:16:31,962 --> 00:16:38,769 WHERE IS THIS SET? >> WE'RE IN OUR ‐‐ MY INLAW'S 274 00:16:38,769 --> 00:16:43,340 HOUSE. THESE ARE MY WIFE'S PARENTS. 275 00:16:43,340 --> 00:16:47,911 THEY'VE BEEN KIND TO LET ME FIND A CORNER AND DO THE SHOW. 276 00:16:47,911 --> 00:16:49,112 THEY'VE BEEN ESPECIALLY KIND BECAUSE I'VE JUST USED A LOT OF 277 00:16:49,112 --> 00:17:01,258 THEIR ARTWORK AND LET IT BECOME CHARACTERS IN THE SHOW 278 00:17:01,258 --> 00:17:02,392 >> I KNOW THAT ‐‐ THE SEA CAPTAIN IS A PREDOMINANT SIDE 279 00:17:02,392 --> 00:17:05,195 KICK ON YOUR SHOW AND I LOVE IT 280 00:17:05,195 --> 00:17:06,430 HE'S NOW BECOME A CHARACTER ON THE SHOW, AS THE DUCK, AS WELL, 281 00:17:06,430 --> 00:17:10,667 THE WOODEN DUCK. >> YEAH. 282 00:17:10,667 --> 00:17:13,870 REALLY ‐‐ REALLY POLARIZING CHARACTERS 283 00:17:13,870 --> 00:17:15,105 A LOT OF PEOPLE ON TWITTER MAKE IT VERY CLEAR THEY DON'T LIKE 284 00:17:15,105 --> 00:17:16,340 IT AND I JUST LIKE TO STRESS TO THEM IT'S NOT GOING TO HAPPEN 285 00:17:16,340 --> 00:17:23,580 FOR A LOT LONGER NO ONE IS COMING BACK TO ME 286 00:17:23,580 --> 00:17:26,183 WITH NEW YORK CITY THEY BELONG TO THE SEA AND THEY 287 00:17:26,183 --> 00:17:31,989 DON'T WANT TO BE ‐‐ THEY DON'T WANT TO BE ON MANHATTAN. 288 00:17:31,989 --> 00:17:34,057 BUT, YEAH, IT'S BEEN FUN THE SHOW HAS TURNED INTO 289 00:17:34,057 --> 00:17:38,628 PEEWEE'S PLAY HOUSE AND I'M HAPPY ABOUT IT 290 00:17:38,628 --> 00:17:45,569 >> CAN I TALK TO THE SEA CAPTAIN? 291 00:17:45,569 --> 00:17:47,104 >> I TOLD THE CAPTAIN I WAS COMING ON YOUR SHOW TONIGHT? 292 00:17:47,104 --> 00:17:52,209 DO YOU HAVE ANYTHING YOU WANT TO SAY TO JIMMY? 293 00:17:52,209 --> 00:17:55,479 >> ALL RIGHT, JIMMY, I LOVE THE ROOTS! 294 00:17:55,479 --> 00:17:59,616 >> THAT'S SO NICE. THANK YOU, SEA CAPTAIN 295 00:17:59,616 --> 00:18:00,617 THANK YOU FOR BEING ON THE SHOW 296 00:18:00,617 --> 00:18:05,756 THAT'S SO ‐‐ THAT VOICE SOUNDS FAMILIAR 297 00:18:05,756 --> 00:18:07,858 OH, MY GOSH. >> THE VOICE SOUNDS FAMILIAR 298 00:18:07,858 --> 00:18:09,092 AND THE MOST ‐‐ AGAIN, I CAN'T EVEN GIVE A HINT AS TO WHO THE 299 00:18:09,092 --> 00:18:12,195 VOICE IS BECAUSE WE'RE PLAYING IT REAL 300 00:18:12,195 --> 00:18:15,532 CLOSE TO THE VEST. >> ONCE THAT COMES OUT, FORGET 301 00:18:15,532 --> 00:18:18,502 IT >> BUT I WILL SAY THE FUNNIEST 302 00:18:18,502 --> 00:18:19,603 PART OF MY DAY IS TEXTING A PERSON THAT YOU AND I BOTH 303 00:18:19,603 --> 00:18:20,871 KNOW, A BUNCH OF LINES WITH NO CONTEXT AND GETTING A TEXT BACK 304 00:18:20,871 --> 00:18:34,284 IN A SEA CAPTAIN VOICE >> IT'S WELL DONE. 305 00:18:34,284 --> 00:18:35,485 ARE YOUR IN‐LAWS ‐‐ ARE THEY HAPPY THAT YOU'RE THERE OR ‐ 306 00:18:35,485 --> 00:18:41,391 HOW IS THAT ‐‐ >> THEY WERE PRETTY HAPPY. 307 00:18:41,391 --> 00:18:42,659 I THINK THEY WERE BRAGGING IT UP TO THEIR FRIENDS, YOU KNOW, 308 00:18:42,659 --> 00:18:45,662 THAT THEIR HOME HAD BECOME A A STUDIO 309 00:18:45,662 --> 00:18:50,667 BUT THEY WERE A LITTLE UNHAPPY BECAUSE ‐‐ TOTALLY TONGUE IN 310 00:18:50,667 --> 00:18:54,204 CHEEK AND SHAME ON ME, WE DID A BIT WHERE I SAID, HEY, WE 311 00:18:54,204 --> 00:18:58,775 WOULD LOVE TO HEAR WHAT YOU THINK ABOUT THE SEA CAPTAIN. 312 00:18:58,775 --> 00:18:59,976 WE WOULD LIKE YOU TO GOOGLE SEA CAPTAIN, PRINT THAT PAGE OFF 313 00:18:59,976 --> 00:19:01,211 YOUR COMPUTER, AND THEN EITHER WRITE YES OR NO AND MAIL IT TO 314 00:19:01,211 --> 00:19:08,051 YOUR BEST GUESTS AS WHERE THEY IN‐LAWS LIVE 315 00:19:08,051 --> 00:19:09,386 AND, WELL, SOME PEOPLE DID SOME SLEUTHING AND WE RECEIVED 30 316 00:19:09,386 --> 00:19:19,663 LETTERS. NOW, IN THE MIDDLE OF 317 00:19:19,663 --> 00:19:20,797 A PANDEMIC WHAT YOU'RE NOT SUPERLOOKING FOR IS MAIL FROM 318 00:19:20,797 --> 00:19:25,001 STRANGERS. AND SO PRETTY MUCH EVERY DAY MY 319 00:19:25,001 --> 00:19:30,240 IN‐LAWS ARE LIKE, WHY ARE WE GETTING THIS MAIL? 320 00:19:30,240 --> 00:19:35,479 I'VE BEEN IN THIS HOUSE BEFORE NO ONE HAS EVER SENT FAN MAIL. 321 00:19:35,479 --> 00:19:36,746 AND IT IS DEFINITELY A BUMMER TO HAVE TO TELL THEM, HERE IS 322 00:19:36,746 --> 00:19:39,983 WHY THE MAIL IS COMING I MADE A DUMB JOKE AND PEOPLE 323 00:19:39,983 --> 00:19:47,090 DECIDED TO ENGAGE WITH IT. >> HOPEFULLY THAT STOPS SOON 324 00:19:47,090 --> 00:19:50,360 THE SEA CAPTAIN ‐‐ >> SOMEONE FROM AUSTRALIA SENT 325 00:19:50,360 --> 00:19:55,932 US A LETTER AND THE BEST PART ABOUT IT WAS THEIR VOTE WAS NO 326 00:19:55,932 --> 00:19:58,935 THEY HATED THE SEA CAPTAIN SO MUCH 327 00:19:58,935 --> 00:20:01,538 THEY SENT A LETTER FROM AUSTRALIA. 328 00:20:01,538 --> 00:20:02,706 >> AND MADE IT ALL THE WAY FROM AUSTRALIA TO SAY NO MORE SEA 329 00:20:02,706 --> 00:20:07,410 CAPTAIN. THIS IS ‐‐ YOUR NEXT LOCATION 330 00:20:07,410 --> 00:20:10,046 WILL BE 30 ROCK. >> YEAH, WE'RE COMING BACK 331 00:20:10,046 --> 00:20:12,916 SOON I WANT TO THANK YOU AND YOUR 332 00:20:12,916 --> 00:20:14,117 WHOLE CREW AND EVERYBODY ‐‐ YOU BASICALLY HAVE LIKE SET THE 333 00:20:14,117 --> 00:20:21,291 TONE AND BASICALLY TAKEN ALL THE RISKS ON BEHALF OF US. 334 00:20:21,291 --> 00:20:23,994 THANK YOU SO MUCH. >> IT'S ‐‐ IT'S REALLY A 335 00:20:23,994 --> 00:20:27,864 A BIZARRE TIME TO BE IN THIS BUILDING 336 00:20:27,864 --> 00:20:29,399 I THINK YOU'RE GOING TO BE ‐ NBC IS DOING AN AMAZING JOB 337 00:20:29,399 --> 00:20:33,370 WITH THIS THING, TAKING IT VERY SERIOUSLY. 338 00:20:33,370 --> 00:20:35,939 BUT THERE'S NO CAMERA OPERATORS RIGHT NOW. 339 00:20:35,939 --> 00:20:38,675 THEY'RE ROBOTS AND THERE'S NO ‐ 340 00:20:38,675 --> 00:20:39,709 IT'S ‐‐ THERE'S ONE STAGE MANAGER, HAS A MASK AND 341 00:20:39,709 --> 00:20:43,480 A SHIELD IT'S DEFINITELY DIFFERENT. 342 00:20:43,480 --> 00:20:49,619 BUT IT ‐ >> HOW IS HIGGINS TAKING ‐ 343 00:20:49,619 --> 00:20:52,455 FINDING OUT HE'S NONESSENTIAL? >> HE'S LOVING LIFE. 344 00:20:52,455 --> 00:20:56,159 ARE YOU KIDDING ME HE'S SO HAPPY. 345 00:20:56,159 --> 00:20:57,427 HE'S DOING VOICEOVERS FROM HIS HOUSE, SENDING ME PICTURES OF 346 00:20:57,427 --> 00:21:05,602 JUMPING IN THE POOL. TODAY IS HIS BIRTH, BY THE WAY 347 00:21:05,602 --> 00:21:09,072 >> HAPPY BIRTHDAY! THERE YOU GO 348 00:21:09,072 --> 00:21:11,575 THAT'S GREAT TO HEAR >>> MORE WITH SETH MEYERS WHEN 349 00:21:11,575 --> 00:21:13,461 WE COME BACK, EVERYBODY. 350 00:21:31,485 --> 00:21:34,247 >>> WELCOME BACK, EVERYBODY. 351 00:21:34,247 --> 00:21:36,416 I'M TALKING WITH SETH MEYERS SETH, THANKS, AGAIN, FOR COMING 352 00:21:36,416 --> 00:21:39,953 ON THE SHOW. I APPRECIATE IT. 353 00:21:39,953 --> 00:21:42,155 THANK YOU, THANK YOU SO MUCH I KNOW YOU'RE SUPERBUSY AND I 354 00:21:42,155 --> 00:21:46,492 WANT TO SAY, CONGRATULATIONS FOR THE EMMY NOMINATIONS 355 00:21:46,492 --> 00:21:48,761 ONE FOR ‐‐ >> THANK YOU 356 00:21:48,761 --> 00:21:49,996 >> ONE FOR LATE NIGHT AND ALSO THE NETFLIX SPECIAL "LOBBY 357 00:21:49,996 --> 00:21:54,667 BABY." >> THAT WAS A NICE SURPRISE AND 358 00:21:54,667 --> 00:21:59,939 REALLY HONORED >> YOU GUYS ARE AWESOME, MAN 359 00:21:59,939 --> 00:22:01,908 I'M HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS CONGRATS TO THE WHOLE CREW OVER 360 00:22:01,908 --> 00:22:05,378 THERE. "LOBBY BABY" WAS FANTASTIC 361 00:22:05,378 --> 00:22:06,579 IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN IT, IT REFERS TO YOUR YOUNGEST SON WHO 362 00:22:06,579 --> 00:22:14,053 WAS BORN IN THE LOBBY OF YOUR APARTMENT. 363 00:22:14,053 --> 00:22:15,888 >> YES, AXLE WAS BORN IN THE LOBBY. 364 00:22:15,888 --> 00:22:19,058 >> HOW OLD IS AXLE NOW IS HE 1? 365 00:22:19,058 --> 00:22:22,462 >> HE'S 2 1/2 NOW. HE'S A LITTLE DUDE 366 00:22:22,462 --> 00:22:26,265 >> WOW IS HE TALKING? 367 00:22:26,265 --> 00:22:28,334 >> HE'S TALKING BUT HE'S NOT ENUNCIATING. 368 00:22:28,334 --> 00:22:31,504 IT'S REALLY ‐‐ WE'RE VERY LUCKY. 369 00:22:31,504 --> 00:22:35,241 HIS OLDER BROTHER ASH IS GOOGLE TRANSLATE FOR AXLE 370 00:22:35,241 --> 00:22:41,147 AXLE WILL COME IN THE ROOM AND SAY ‐‐ I HAVE NO IDEA. 371 00:22:41,147 --> 00:22:45,218 YOU'LL LOOK AT ASH AND ASH WILL BE DOING SOMETHING ELSE AND BE 372 00:22:45,218 --> 00:22:50,757 LIKE, HE WANTS HIS LEGO BRIDGE THAT'S INCREDIBLE. 373 00:22:50,757 --> 00:22:52,492 >> THAT'S WILD >> THEY'RE VERY FUN. 374 00:22:52,492 --> 00:22:55,662 THEY'RE VERY FUN THAT WAY. >> AND DO THE PARENTS SPOIL THE 375 00:22:55,662 --> 00:22:58,831 KIDS >> OH, MAN 376 00:22:58,831 --> 00:23:01,901 MY PARENTS WERE HERE FOR THE WEEKEND AND I'M REALIZING THAT 377 00:23:01,901 --> 00:23:02,935 GRANDPARENTS ARE JUST A TERRIBLE INFLUENCE ON YOUR 378 00:23:02,935 --> 00:23:06,639 CHILDREN I WOULD RATHER MY KIDS JOIN 379 00:23:06,639 --> 00:23:09,342 A GANG THAN SPEND THREE HOURS WITH MY PARENTS. 380 00:23:09,342 --> 00:23:10,643 THEY CAME BACK THE OTHER DAY AND MY 4‐YEAR‐OLD WALKED UP AND 381 00:23:10,643 --> 00:23:17,650 SAID, DADDY, I HAVE A SECRET AND I HAVE WHAT IS IT? 382 00:23:17,650 --> 00:23:21,788 HE SAID ‐‐ HE WAS LIKE, GRANDMA SAYS I CAN'T TELL YOU. 383 00:23:21,788 --> 00:23:23,222 THAT SECRETS ARE THINGS YOU CAN'T TELL 384 00:23:23,222 --> 00:23:24,424 I'M LIKE, WHY ARE YOU TEACHING HIM THAT 385 00:23:24,424 --> 00:23:32,498 WHY ARE YOU CUTTING OFF INFORMATION FROM THE PARENT? 386 00:23:32,498 --> 00:23:33,700 AND I WANT YOU ‐‐ YOU KNOW HOW YOU WANT YOUR PARENTS TO TAKE 387 00:23:33,700 --> 00:23:34,434 YOUR KIDS OUT AND TIRE THEM OUT? 388 00:23:34,434 --> 00:23:35,802 MY KIDS COME BACK SO AMPED UP BECAUSE MY DAD ‐‐ GOD BLESS MY 389 00:23:35,802 --> 00:23:41,708 DAD. HE'S GETTING OLDER 390 00:23:41,708 --> 00:23:44,310 ALL HE DOES IS CHASE THEM FOR THREE HOURS. 391 00:23:44,310 --> 00:23:45,545 THEY COME BACK LIKE CHARACTERS IN A HORROR MOVIE, THEIR HEARTS 392 00:23:45,545 --> 00:23:46,512 ARE POUNDING BECAUSE IT'S SO ‐‐ AND THEY 393 00:23:46,512 --> 00:23:52,652 FEED THEM ‐‐ THEY COMPLETELY THROW THEIR DIET OFF 394 00:23:52,652 --> 00:23:57,223 THEY'LL SAY ‐‐ THEY DON'T WANT DINNER 395 00:23:57,223 --> 00:24:00,727 YOU'LL SAY, WHAT DID YOU FEED THEM 396 00:24:00,727 --> 00:24:04,764 THEY'RE LIKE A BAG OF SKITTLES AND HALF A CUP OF COFFEE 397 00:24:04,764 --> 00:24:05,865 >> MY MOM AND DAD FOR MY SISTER'S KIDS, THEY GAVE THEM 398 00:24:05,865 --> 00:24:11,003 PINTS OF ICE CREAM OF BEN AND JERRY'S. 399 00:24:11,003 --> 00:24:21,714 I GO, YOU GIVE THEM A SCOOP ‐‐ THEY'RE LIKE, LET THEM LIVE. 400 00:24:21,714 --> 00:24:22,915 >> ALEXEI'S DAD SAID WHEN ASH WAS 1, WE CAME HOME AND HE HAD 401 00:24:22,915 --> 00:24:24,016 BEEN WATCHING HIM, AND HE ASKED, HAS ASH EVER HAD ICE 402 00:24:24,016 --> 00:24:32,859 CREAM? AND WE SAID NO 403 00:24:32,859 --> 00:24:35,862 HE HAS NOW HE GOES, DON'T WORRY, HE LIKED 404 00:24:35,862 --> 00:24:37,563 IT WE WANTED TO SAY, WE DIDN'T 405 00:24:37,563 --> 00:24:43,269 THINK HE WOULDN'T LIKE IT. >> IT WAS NEVER ON THE TABLE 406 00:24:43,269 --> 00:24:44,470 >> WE SHOULD HOLD OFF ON ICE CREAM UNTIL HE DEVELOPS A TASTE 407 00:24:44,470 --> 00:24:53,179 FOR DAIRY AND SUGAR. >> WHO DO YOU HAVE ON THE SHOW 408 00:24:53,179 --> 00:24:55,515 TONIGHT? >> WE HAVE PAULA PELL, JOHN 409 00:24:55,515 --> 00:25:03,022 LUTZ AND FROM CNN JOHN BERMAN. >> THAT SHOW, BY THE WAY, IT'S 410 00:25:03,022 --> 00:25:07,493 SO FUNNY ON QUIBI. THAT MUST BE A BLAST 411 00:25:07,493 --> 00:25:08,528 >> THE TRUEST FORM OF RELENTLESSLY DUMB JOKES, ONE 412 00:25:08,528 --> 00:25:15,034 AFTER ANOTHER. >> JUST HITTING ‐‐ LOBBING 413 00:25:15,034 --> 00:25:17,904 HOMERS OVER ‐‐ I GO, ANOTHER ONE. 414 00:25:17,904 --> 00:25:24,443 AND THE SET MUST BE SO MUCH FUN BECAUSE SHE'S JUST LIKE ‐‐ IS 415 00:25:24,443 --> 00:25:25,611 EXACTLY PAULA WHEN SHE'S AT HER HOTTEST, SHOOTING FROM ALL 416 00:25:25,611 --> 00:25:33,786 CYLINDERS. SHE'S AMAZING. 417 00:25:33,786 --> 00:25:34,754 I DIDN'T EVEN TALK ABOUT THAT BIT. 418 00:25:34,754 --> 00:25:35,922 DO YOU REMEMBER THAT BIT SHE DOES WHEN SHE INSULTS EVERYBODY 419 00:25:35,922 --> 00:25:37,156 AND LEAVES THE ROOM AND HAS TO COME BACK BECAUSE SHE FORGOT 420 00:25:37,156 --> 00:25:45,531 HER KEYS I CAN'T WAIT TO HEAR BACK ON 30 421 00:25:45,531 --> 00:25:49,168 ROCK AND WE'LL GIVE YOU A BIG WELCOME WHEN YOU COME BACK 422 00:25:49,168 --> 00:25:50,369 THANK YOU FOR DOING THE SHOWS THAT YOU'RE DOING BECAUSE 423 00:25:50,369 --> 00:25:51,537 YOU'RE MAKING PEOPLE LAUGH AND IT'S A ‐‐ THAT LITTLE BIT OF 424 00:25:51,537 --> 00:25:58,010 NORMALCY THAT GOES A LONG, LONG WAY. 425 00:25:58,010 --> 00:26:00,179 DOING A GREAT JOB. >> THANKS FOR BEING BACK AND 426 00:26:00,179 --> 00:26:05,484 BEING READY TO SHOW US HOW IT'S DONE WHEN WE JOIN YOU. 427 00:26:05,484 --> 00:26:07,753 >> SETH MEYERS, EVERYBODY. DAVID BLAINE AFTER THE BREAK 428 00:26:07,753 --> 00:26:09,388 STRIKE AROUND. THANKS, SETH 429 00:26:09,388 --> 00:26:12,033 >> THAT WAS SUPERFUN ♪ 430 00:26:27,548 --> 00:26:32,040 >>> MY NEXT GUEST IS AN UNBELIEVABLE MAGICIAN WHO JUST 431 00:26:32,040 --> 00:26:33,241 ANNOUNCED HIS FIRST LIVE STUNT IN NEARLY A DECADE ON AUGUST 432 00:26:33,241 --> 00:26:39,581 31st YOU CAN WATCH DAVID BLAINE, 433 00:26:39,581 --> 00:26:43,318 "ASCENSION", LIVE ON YOUTUBE HERE TO TELL US MORE ABOUT IT 434 00:26:43,318 --> 00:26:47,455 IS DAVID BLAINE. GREAT TO SEE YOU, BUD. 435 00:26:47,455 --> 00:26:52,460 >> GREAT TO SEE YOU. >> I'M ALWAYS HAPPY TO SEE YOU 436 00:26:52,460 --> 00:26:55,430 I'M ALWAYS A LITTLE NERVOUS WHEN I SEE YOU AND ANXIOUS 437 00:26:55,430 --> 00:26:57,599 BUT ALWAYS IN A GOOD WAY WE'VE BEEN THROUGH ‐‐ WE'VE 438 00:26:57,599 --> 00:26:58,733 SEEN YOU ‐‐ I'VE SEWED YOUR LIPS SHUT WITH A NEEDLE AND 439 00:26:58,733 --> 00:27:06,775 THREAD >> LET'S TRY SOMETHING SIMPLE. 440 00:27:06,775 --> 00:27:10,846 >> OKAY. >> DO YOU WANT TO TAKE OUT THE 441 00:27:10,846 --> 00:27:17,052 NUMBERS OR THE PICTURES? NUMBER CARDS OR PICTURE CARDS? 442 00:27:17,052 --> 00:27:21,990 >> PICTURES. >> OKAY. 443 00:27:21,990 --> 00:27:23,725 THE PICTURES, YOU HAVE THE JACKS, THE QUEENS OR THE KINGS 444 00:27:23,725 --> 00:27:26,695 WHICH ONES DO YOU WANT YOU DECIDE 445 00:27:26,695 --> 00:27:29,097 >> I LIKE JACKS. >> OKAY. 446 00:27:29,097 --> 00:27:31,933 JACKS, YOU HAVE A RED JACK OR A BLACK JACK 447 00:27:31,933 --> 00:27:33,702 REDS OR BLACKS >> I'M GOING TO SEE A BLACK 448 00:27:33,702 --> 00:27:36,972 JACK >> BY THE WAY, YOU CAN CHANGE 449 00:27:36,972 --> 00:27:38,773 YOUR MIND AT ANY POINT I DON'T WANT YOU TO THINK THAT 450 00:27:38,773 --> 00:27:41,877 I'M MAKING YOU SAY THIS. DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE? 451 00:27:41,877 --> 00:27:44,946 >> NO, I'LL STICK WITH BLACK JACK 452 00:27:44,946 --> 00:27:46,047 >> THE BLACK JACKS, YOU HAVE CLUBS OR SPADES. 453 00:27:46,047 --> 00:27:50,852 WHICH ONE DO YOU WANT? >> I'LL DO CLUBS 454 00:27:50,852 --> 00:27:52,587 >> BY THE WAY, NOBODY EVER CHANGES, BUT YOU CAN 455 00:27:52,587 --> 00:27:58,226 IT'S UP TO YOU >> YOU'RE SO IN MY HEAD RIGHT 456 00:27:58,226 --> 00:28:00,562 NOW. >> IF YOU WANT TO CHANGE TO THE 457 00:28:00,562 --> 00:28:03,198 OTHER ONE, YOU CAN YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT 458 00:28:03,198 --> 00:28:07,469 >> I WILL CHANGE >> TO WHICH ONE? 459 00:28:07,469 --> 00:28:09,971 YOU WANT TO GO TO THE SPADE OR THE CLUB OR ‐‐ 460 00:28:09,971 --> 00:28:16,111 >> I'LL SAY ‐‐ I'LL SAY SPADE. >> ARE YOU SURE? 461 00:28:16,111 --> 00:28:19,714 DO YOU WANT TO CHANGE BACK >> NO, JACK OF SPADES. 462 00:28:19,714 --> 00:28:23,218 >> YOU'RE SURE >> YES 463 00:28:23,218 --> 00:28:24,519 >> LOOK, HERE, I JUST WANT TO SHOW YOU SOMETHING FUNNY IN THE 464 00:28:24,519 --> 00:28:29,224 DECK HERE IT IS 465 00:28:29,224 --> 00:28:30,425 THERE'S ONE CARD THAT'S A LITTLE DIFFERENT THAN ALL THE 466 00:28:30,425 --> 00:28:31,459 OTHERS AND YOU CAN SEE, LOOK, THE ONE 467 00:28:31,459 --> 00:28:32,694 CARD THAT IS DIFFERENT IS IN THE MIDDLE AND IT'S ‐‐ SEE THAT 468 00:28:32,694 --> 00:28:43,772 ONE CARD IT'S A JACK OF SPADES. 469 00:28:43,772 --> 00:28:48,009 JIMMY, LISTEN TO ME, IT'S POSSIBLE THAT I DID SOME SLIGHT 470 00:28:48,009 --> 00:28:50,912 OF HAND. WHEN I WAS REMOVING THE CARDS 471 00:28:50,912 --> 00:28:58,186 IN THE BOX, MAYBE I FLICKED IT REALLY FAST, CORRECT 472 00:28:58,186 --> 00:28:59,821 >> SURE. >> NO, IT'S NOT POSSIBLE 473 00:28:59,821 --> 00:29:00,956 BECAUSE THIS, THE JACK OF SPADES IS THE ONLY RED CARD IN 474 00:29:00,956 --> 00:29:06,494 THIS DECK. SEE. 475 00:29:06,494 --> 00:29:07,595 NOT ONLY IS IT THE ONLY RED CARD IN THE DECK, YOU'RE 476 00:29:07,595 --> 00:29:09,564 THINKING, WAIT, MAYBE HE CONVINCED ME 477 00:29:09,564 --> 00:29:14,035 THERE'S NO OTHER CARD THAT WOULD HAVE WORKED. 478 00:29:14,035 --> 00:29:16,004 ONLY THE JACK OF SPADES WOULD HAVE WORKED FROM THE VERY 479 00:29:16,004 --> 00:29:20,275 BEGINNING. LOOK 480 00:29:20,275 --> 00:29:26,848 THE WHOLE DECK BLANK. 481 00:29:26,848 --> 00:29:30,251 >> YOU'RE UNBELIEVABLE, MAN. THAT IS INSANITY 482 00:29:30,251 --> 00:29:34,589 >> HOLD ON YOU CAN SEE ALL THE CARDS. 483 00:29:34,589 --> 00:29:35,690 YOU CAN SEE ALL OF THE CARDS ON THE DECK 484 00:29:35,690 --> 00:29:37,525 YOU CAN SEE THEY'RE ALL DIFFERENT, YES 485 00:29:37,525 --> 00:29:38,860 >> YES >> YOU THOUGHT OF A JACK OF 486 00:29:38,860 --> 00:29:41,796 SPADES BUT YOU CHANGED FROM THE JACK OF CLUBS. 487 00:29:41,796 --> 00:29:43,064 NOW I WANT YOU TO THINK OF A A NEW CARD THAT WOULD BE YOUR 488 00:29:43,064 --> 00:29:51,539 FAVORITE CARD BUT ONE THAT I COULD NEVER KNOW 489 00:29:51,539 --> 00:30:08,590 >> OKAY. [ LAUGHTER ] 490 00:30:08,590 --> 00:30:09,891 >> WAIT, JIMMY WHAT WAS THE CARD THAT YOU WERE 491 00:30:09,891 --> 00:30:12,961 THINKING OF? >> IT WAS DIFFERENT CARD 492 00:30:12,961 --> 00:30:16,431 IT WAS 8 OF HEARTS >> OH, YEAH, GOOD. 493 00:30:16,431 --> 00:30:26,708 THAT WORKED. [ LAUGHTER ] 494 00:30:26,708 --> 00:30:30,545 >> OH, MY GOSH >> YOU KNOW THE ‐‐ JIMMY, YOU 495 00:30:30,545 --> 00:30:31,713 KNOW THAT WHEN YOU THINK OF CARDS, LIKE, ANY CARD THAT YOU 496 00:30:31,713 --> 00:30:37,252 WOULD THINK OF, I WOULD BE ABLE TO PRODUCE 497 00:30:37,252 --> 00:30:40,622 IT DOESN'T MAKE A DIFFERENCE >> I DON'T KNOW HOW. 498 00:30:40,622 --> 00:30:43,224 >> ANY CARD THAT YOU WOULD CHOOSE ‐ 499 00:30:43,224 --> 00:30:44,526 >> I DON'T KNOW ‐‐ I DON'T KNOW HOW. 500 00:30:44,526 --> 00:30:47,262 I DON'T KNOW HOW >> DO YOU WANT ME TO TELL YOU 501 00:30:47,262 --> 00:30:49,798 HOW? >> SURE. 502 00:30:49,798 --> 00:30:51,966 >> YOU WANT ME TO TELL YOU HOW >> NO. 503 00:30:51,966 --> 00:30:54,936 DO I >> THE REASON I CAN SPIT YOUR 504 00:30:54,936 --> 00:30:59,641 CARD OUT OF MY MOUTH IS BECAUSE I HAVE A SECRET ASSISTANT. 505 00:30:59,641 --> 00:31:02,677 YOU MIGHT REMEMBER HIM HE'S GROWN A BIT SINCE THE LAST 506 00:31:02,677 --> 00:31:06,414 TIME YOU SAW HIM >> IT'S NOT A FROG, PLEASE 507 00:31:06,414 --> 00:31:10,585 PLEASE DON'T DO THIS NO, IT'S NOT 508 00:31:10,585 --> 00:31:21,162 YOU'RE NOT DOING THIS. [ LAUGHTER ] 509 00:31:21,162 --> 00:31:30,338 >> WHAT IS GOING ON? WHAT IS GOING ON 510 00:31:30,338 --> 00:31:31,339 YOU HAVE TO STOP DOING THAT, MAN. 511 00:31:31,339 --> 00:31:33,541 THAT IS UN ‐ >> THIS IS MY MAGICAL 512 00:31:33,541 --> 00:31:37,378 ASSISTANT, SEE >> AND HE HANDS YOU DIFFERENT 513 00:31:37,378 --> 00:31:39,647 CARDS. HE'S A VERY GOOD ‐‐ OH, MY 514 00:31:39,647 --> 00:31:42,851 GOSH DAVID, HE'S ‐‐ HE'S GETTING ‐‐ 515 00:31:42,851 --> 00:31:47,355 OH, MY GOD DAVID BLAINE, WE HAVE TO TALK 516 00:31:47,355 --> 00:31:48,189 ABOUT YOUR NEW SPECIAL, "THE ASCENSION. 517 00:31:48,189 --> 00:31:49,591 IT'S ON YOUTUBE AUGUST 31st. FROM WHAT I'VE HEARD ABOUT 518 00:31:49,591 --> 00:31:57,232 DAVID BLAINE "ASCENSION" IS THAT ‐ 519 00:31:57,232 --> 00:32:07,175 [ LAUGHTER ] >> SORRY 520 00:32:07,175 --> 00:32:15,316 THERE WAS ANOTHER ONE. >> OH, MY GOSH 521 00:32:15,316 --> 00:32:24,459 YOU HAVE TWO ASSISTANTS. >> YEAH. 522 00:32:24,459 --> 00:32:28,596 SO THE NEW ONE THAT I'M WORKING ON, IT'S CALLED "ASCENSION", 523 00:32:28,596 --> 00:32:29,764 AND THE GOAL IS I WANT TO TAKE A BUNCH OF BALLOONS AND JUST 524 00:32:29,764 --> 00:32:33,101 FLOAT UP INTO THE SKY UNTIL I VANISH 525 00:32:33,101 --> 00:32:38,973 MY DREAM HAS ALWAYS BEEN LOOKING UP INTO THE SKY, IT 526 00:32:38,973 --> 00:32:42,477 WOULD BE AMAZING TO JUST ‐‐ LIKE THE MOVIE, GRAB A BUNCH OF 527 00:32:42,477 --> 00:32:45,847 BALLOONS AND GO DRIFTING AWAY. I'VE BEEN PUTTING THIS TOGETHER 528 00:32:45,847 --> 00:32:46,948 AND I HAVE AN AMAZING TEAM AND WORKING WITH YOUTUBE HAS 529 00:32:46,948 --> 00:32:58,993 ALLOWED ME TO KIND OF JUST PUT TOGETHER THIS INSANE IDEA. 530 00:32:58,993 --> 00:33:00,094 >> HOPEFULLY YOU'RE DOING THIS SAFELY 531 00:33:00,094 --> 00:33:06,100 >> YEAH, WE'RE DOING IT SAFELY AND I'VE BEEN PRACTICING AND I 532 00:33:06,100 --> 00:33:10,038 HAD TO GET A HOT AIR BALLOON PILOT LICENSE. 533 00:33:10,038 --> 00:33:14,175 IT GOT MY GAS RESTRICTION LIFTED SO I COULD FLY 534 00:33:14,175 --> 00:33:17,045 HELIUM‐FILLED BALLOONS WHICH IS PRETTY RARE. 535 00:33:17,045 --> 00:33:18,213 I'VE BEEN JUMPING OUT OF AIRPLANES TO GET COMFORTABLE IN 536 00:33:18,213 --> 00:33:24,786 THE AIR. >> WILL YOU HAVE A PARACHUTE OR 537 00:33:24,786 --> 00:33:30,925 ANYTHING WHAT IF THE BALLOONS POP 538 00:33:30,925 --> 00:33:34,862 >> I WOULD HAVE ONE UP IN THE BALLOONS 539 00:33:34,862 --> 00:33:36,064 BECAUSE I ‐‐ I WANT IT TO BE THE IMAGE OF JUST A BOY HOLDING 540 00:33:36,064 --> 00:33:37,198 A BUNCH OF BALLOONS AND DRIFTING AWAY LIKE THE MOVIE I 541 00:33:37,198 --> 00:33:44,572 SAW. I WANT IT TO BE SIMPLISTIC 542 00:33:44,572 --> 00:33:45,673 >> I UNDERSTAND WHAT YOU WANT IT TO LOOK LIKE. 543 00:33:45,673 --> 00:33:52,113 YOU CAN ALWAYS DRAW IT YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO IT. 544 00:33:52,113 --> 00:33:53,281 >> SO BEHIND ME IS SOME OF THE ‐‐ WE'RE IN THE WAREHOUSE, 545 00:33:53,281 --> 00:33:55,116 ACTUALLY BEHIND ME IS ENOUGH OF THE 546 00:33:55,116 --> 00:33:59,887 BALLOONS THAT MY DAUGHTER WOULD ‐‐ THIS IS ENOUGH TO 547 00:33:59,887 --> 00:34:04,259 FLOAT MY DAUGHTER RIGHT HERE THIS IS JUST A LITTLE BIT OF 548 00:34:04,259 --> 00:34:09,163 THE RIG WHICH WE'RE GOING TO BE USING. 549 00:34:09,163 --> 00:34:13,534 AND THEN OBVIOUSLY FOR ME IT'S MUCH ‐‐ MUCH BIGGER RIG AND I 550 00:34:13,534 --> 00:34:19,874 WOULD SAY CAN 20 MORE OF THOSE BALLOONS I WOULD GO FLOATING 551 00:34:19,874 --> 00:34:27,415 ALL THE WAY UP AND DISAPPEAR INTO THE SKY LEGITIMATELY. 552 00:34:27,415 --> 00:34:28,716 ANYTHING OVER, YOU KNOW, 18,000 FEET GETS ‐‐ BECOMES MORE AND 553 00:34:28,716 --> 00:34:29,851 MORE DANGEROUS BECAUSE THE TEMPERATURES DROP AND YOU CAN 554 00:34:29,851 --> 00:34:39,460 BECOME HYPOXIC AND THINGS LIKE THAT 555 00:34:39,460 --> 00:34:42,630 I'VE BEEN PRACTICING AND LEARNING ALL OF THAT 556 00:34:42,630 --> 00:34:46,134 >> THIS IS AUGUST 31st THIS IS HAPPENING, LIVE ON YOUTUBE 557 00:34:46,134 --> 00:34:48,536 >> DEPENDING ON THE WINDS. >> OKAY. 558 00:34:48,536 --> 00:34:50,938 WEATHER PERMITTING YOU DON'T WANT TO END UP ‐ 559 00:34:50,938 --> 00:34:54,008 >> WEATHER PERMITTING. >> YOU'RE GOING TO END UP IN 560 00:34:54,008 --> 00:34:55,176 CALIFORNIA AGAIN AND YOU'RE GOING TO GO, WHAT HAPPENED TO 561 00:34:55,176 --> 00:34:57,478 DAVID BLAINE HE'S STILL FLOATING. 562 00:34:57,478 --> 00:35:01,015 I CANNOT WAIT TO SEE THIS. I'M PSYCHED FOR YOU. 563 00:35:01,015 --> 00:35:02,116 CHECK OUT DAVID BLAINE, "ASCENSION", STREAMING LIVE ON 564 00:35:02,116 --> 00:35:10,291 YOUTUBE IN JUST A FEW WEEKS, AUGUST 31st WEATHER PERMITTING 565 00:35:10,291 --> 00:35:12,460 DAVID, YOU'RE ALWAYS A GREAT GUEST. 566 00:35:12,460 --> 00:35:17,165 PLEASE BE SAFE, BUDDY. I WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN. 567 00:35:17,165 --> 00:35:18,132 >> THANK YOU AND THANKS FOR HAVING ME. 568 00:35:18,132 --> 00:35:21,769 GOOD TO SEE YOU. >> WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH 569 00:35:21,769 --> 00:35:22,389 A PERFORMANCE FROM BURNA BOY COME ON BACK 570 00:35:40,876 --> 00:35:41,604 ♪ >> Jimmy: PERFORMING A MEDLEY 571 00:35:41,604 --> 00:35:44,441 OF THE SONGS "WONDERFUL" AND "MONSTERS YOU MADE" FROM HIS 572 00:35:44,441 --> 00:35:49,646 NEW ALBUM "TWICE AS TALL," OUT NOW. HERE IS BURNA BOY. 573 00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:54,951 ♪ ANYWHERE I GO [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE 574 00:35:54,951 --> 00:35:58,989 'CAUSE MAMA ♪ [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE 575 00:35:58,989 --> 00:36:02,359 ♪ I NO WANT MAKE PERSON TELL ME SAY I TOO LAZY ♪ 576 00:36:02,359 --> 00:36:09,065 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ♪ AS I DEY HUSTLE 577 00:36:09,065 --> 00:36:14,070 LIKE ADEBAYOR OGUNLESI ♪ ♪ NO GO TALK SAY ME 578 00:36:14,070 --> 00:36:16,806 I TOO LAZY ANYWHERE I GO ♪ 579 00:36:16,806 --> 00:36:19,876 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ♪ 'CAUSE MAMA ♪ 580 00:36:19,876 --> 00:36:36,259 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ♪ 581 00:36:36,259 --> 00:36:40,997 ♪ WONDERFUL I GO SHOW YOU WONDER ♪ 582 00:36:40,997 --> 00:36:44,901 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ♪ YOU NO GO BELIEVE 583 00:36:44,901 --> 00:36:48,705 WETIN WON HAPPEN NO DISTURBANCE WHEN TH 584 00:36:48,705 --> 00:36:52,776 CATCH YOU ♪ ♪ LIKE YOU DEY SLEE 585 00:36:52,776 --> 00:36:59,416 BUT THIS ONE PASS YO AS THE DON'T START ♪ 586 00:36:59,416 --> 00:37:03,686 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ♪ FROM YOUR FEE 587 00:37:03,686 --> 00:37:07,090 ALL OVER ♪ [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE 588 00:37:07,090 --> 00:37:10,360 ♪ WITH SOMEBODY DAUGHTE [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE 589 00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:15,632 'CAUSE I'M FEELING I IN MY SOUL ♪ 590 00:37:15,632 --> 00:37:19,969 ♪ SOMETHING IS CHANGING RIGHT IN YOUR FACE 591 00:37:19,969 --> 00:37:25,341 DEY THERE SLOW SOMETHING DEY SCRATCH ME ♪ 592 00:37:25,341 --> 00:37:43,726 ♪ KON BE LIKE JAZZ ♪ ♪ 593 00:37:43,726 --> 00:37:47,897 ♪ ANYWHERE I GO [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE 594 00:37:47,897 --> 00:37:53,570 'CAUSE MAMA ♪ [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE 595 00:37:53,570 --> 00:37:55,405 ♪ I NO WANT MAKE PERSON TELL ME SAY I TOO LAZY ♪ 596 00:37:55,405 --> 00:38:01,311 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ♪ AS I DEY HUSTLE 597 00:38:01,311 --> 00:38:06,349 LIKE ADEBAYOR OGUNLESI NO GO TALK SAY M 598 00:38:06,349 --> 00:38:10,186 I TOO LAZY ♪ ♪ ANYWHERE I GO 599 00:38:10,186 --> 00:38:24,267 [ SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE ♪ CALLING ME A MONSTE 600 00:38:24,267 --> 00:38:27,237 CALLING US FAK NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY 601 00:38:27,237 --> 00:38:33,009 CALLING ME A MONSTER ♪ ♪ JUST 'CAUSE WE SAFE 602 00:38:33,009 --> 00:38:36,079 WELCOME WHERE IT RAINS WHERE WE CREATE BARRICADES 603 00:38:36,079 --> 00:38:38,481 KEEP OUR POSITIONAL WEIGHT ♪ ♪ THAT'S WHY WE STRAP 604 00:38:38,481 --> 00:38:40,450 WITH THE CAS DON'T GET UP FRO 605 00:38:40,450 --> 00:38:41,985 YOU PLACE ♪ ♪ 'CAUSE IT COULD 606 00:38:41,985 --> 00:38:43,520 HAPPEN TODAY NOT KNOWING HO 607 00:38:43,520 --> 00:38:45,255 TO BEHAVE ♪ ♪ THAT IS A SIG 608 00:38:45,255 --> 00:38:47,023 THAT YOU MAK JUST LOOSE YOUR LIFE 609 00:38:47,023 --> 00:38:48,658 WHAT A WASTE ♪ ♪ YOUR BODY FOUND 610 00:38:48,658 --> 00:38:51,060 IN A LAK YOU ‐‐ AROUND IN THE FIS 611 00:38:51,060 --> 00:38:53,029 MAN FOUND YOU DROWNIN' ♪ ♪ FOR DAY 612 00:38:53,029 --> 00:38:55,031 YOU KNOW WE COME FROM A PLACE 613 00:38:55,031 --> 00:38:56,733 WHERE PEOPLE SMILE ♪ ♪ BUT IT'S FAKE 614 00:38:56,733 --> 00:38:58,701 HOW COULD THEY SMILE IF YOU LOOK AROUND M 615 00:38:58,701 --> 00:39:00,470 SURROUNDED BY PAINT ♪ ♪ I SEEN THE SK 616 00:39:00,470 --> 00:39:02,105 TURN TO GREY IT TOOK THE LIGH 617 00:39:02,105 --> 00:39:03,873 FROM THE DAY ♪ ♪ IT'S LIKE THEIR 618 00:39:03,873 --> 00:39:05,475 HEADS OF THE STATE AIN'T COMPREHENDIN 619 00:39:05,475 --> 00:39:07,243 THE HATE ♪ ♪ THAT THE OPPRESSE 620 00:39:07,243 --> 00:39:09,512 GENERATE WHEN THEY BEEN WORKING LIKE SLAVES 621 00:39:09,512 --> 00:39:11,948 TO GET SOME MINIMUM WAGE ♪ ♪ YOU TURN AROUND 622 00:39:11,948 --> 00:39:14,884 AND YOU BLAME THEM THE HECK OF ENRAGE 623 00:39:14,884 --> 00:39:16,519 PUT THEM IN SHACKLES ♪ ♪ AND CHAIN 624 00:39:16,519 --> 00:39:18,821 BECAUSE OF WHAT THEY BECAM WE ARE THE MONSTER 625 00:39:18,821 --> 00:39:23,293 YOU MADE ♪ ♪ CALLING ME A MONSTE 626 00:39:23,293 --> 00:39:28,031 CALLING US FAK NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY 627 00:39:28,031 --> 00:39:32,268 CALLING ME A MONSTER ♪ ♪ JUST 'CAUSE WE SAFE 628 00:39:32,268 --> 00:39:36,206 NO WAY NO WAY NO WAY CALLING ME A MONSTER 629 00:39:36,206 --> 00:39:39,275 MAKE NO MISTAKE ♪ ♪ THAT THERE'S ONLY 630 00:39:39,275 --> 00:39:43,413 SO MUCH THAT YOU CAN TAK WE ARE THE MONSTERS ♪ 631 00:39:43,413 --> 00:39:47,350 ♪ YOU MAD WE ARE THE MONSTER 632 00:39:47,350 --> 00:39:50,186 YOU MADE ♪ >> Jimmy: THANK YOU TO 633 00:39:50,186 --> 00:39:51,487 BURNA BOY. MORE TONIGHT SHOW WHEN WE COME 634 00:39:51,487 --> 00:39:52,334 BACK, EVERYBODY. ♪ 635 00:40:07,255 --> 00:40:11,648 >> Jimmy: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR WATCHING 636 00:40:11,648 --> 00:40:13,183 STAY SAFE OUT THERE. WASH YOUR HANDS. 637 00:40:13,183 --> 00:40:14,718 DON'T TOUCH YOUR FACE. WE'LL SEE YOU TOMORROW 638 00:40:14,718 --> 00:40:16,787 GOODNIGHT, EVERYBODY ♪ 639 00:40:16,787 --> 00:40:51,888 ♪ 55052

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