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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,335 --> 00:00:04,628 >> Dicky: FROM HOLLYWOOD, IT'S "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE," WITH GUEST 2 00:00:04,628 --> 00:00:11,902 HOST, ROB LOWE. TONIGHT, RAMI YUSEF AND MUSIC 3 00:00:11,902 --> 00:00:14,038 FROM DAWES. AND NOW, ROB LOWE! 4 00:00:14,038 --> 00:00:16,273 >> Rob: WELCOME TO “JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE.” 5 00:00:16,273 --> 00:00:20,678 I'M YOUR HOST FOR THE NIGHT, ROB LOWE, OR AS PEOPLE AT THE 6 00:00:20,678 --> 00:00:25,314 AIRPORT CALL ME, “JOHN STAMOS.” TODAY STARTS THE SIXTH MONTH OF 7 00:00:25,314 --> 00:00:30,118 QUARANTINE FOR MANY OF US. AND THIS TIME HAS BEEN 8 00:00:30,118 --> 00:00:31,253 ESPECIALLY TEDIOUS FOR ME BECAUSE UNLIKE MOST PEOPLE, I 9 00:00:31,253 --> 00:00:34,489 DON'T DRINK. HERE'S A FUN FACT, PLAYING 10 00:00:34,489 --> 00:00:38,627 BOGGLE WITHOUT WINE? INSUFFERABLE. 11 00:00:38,627 --> 00:00:39,861 WHEN YOU GET SOBER, THEY TELL YOU TO TAKE IT “ONE DAY AT A 12 00:00:39,861 --> 00:00:42,898 TIME.” BUT NO ONE PREPARED ME FOR THE 13 00:00:42,898 --> 00:00:46,802 FACT THAT IT WOULD BE THE SAME DAY AT A TIME FOR SIX MONTHS 14 00:00:46,802 --> 00:00:53,375 STRAIGHT. BUT BEING HOME HASN'T BEEN ALL 15 00:00:53,375 --> 00:00:54,509 BAD. MY TWO ADULT SONS MOVED BACK IN 16 00:00:54,509 --> 00:01:02,084 WITH US DURING THE PANDEMIC. I'M BASICALLY LIVING IN A FAILED 17 00:01:02,084 --> 00:01:03,185 TV PILOT, AND I KNOW ABOUT THAT KIND OF THING. 18 00:01:03,185 --> 00:01:06,188 HONESTLY THOUGH, WE'VE REALLY BONDED OVER THE PAST FEW MONTHS, 19 00:01:06,188 --> 00:01:10,225 HAD A LOT OF CHATS ABOUT LIFE LESSONS. 20 00:01:10,225 --> 00:01:12,427 LIKE, I THINK IT'S IMPORTANT FOR DADS TO BE OPEN ABOUT THEIR 21 00:01:12,427 --> 00:01:14,796 FAILURES. WHICH WAS EASY FOR ME, I TOLD THEM TO GO ON YOUTUBE AND 22 00:01:14,796 --> 00:01:18,834 SEARCH FOR “ROB LOWE ACADEMY AWARDS 1989.” 23 00:01:18,834 --> 00:01:22,871 AND OF COURSE, WE ALSO GET TO SHARE OUR TRIUMPHS. 24 00:01:22,871 --> 00:01:27,276 AND WE HAVE ONE TONIGHT. LAST NIGHT HERE ON THE SHOW, I 25 00:01:27,276 --> 00:01:30,479 MENTIONED A GREAT INJUSTICE HAD BEEN DONE TO ME BY MY BELOVED 26 00:01:30,479 --> 00:01:34,383 L.A. DODGERS. THEY HAVE A PROGRAM GOING RIGHT 27 00:01:34,383 --> 00:01:36,485 NOW WHERE YOU PAY TO HAVE A CARDBOARD CUTOUT OF YOURSELF PUT 28 00:01:36,485 --> 00:01:38,820 IN THE SEATS AT DODGER STADIUM, AND ALL THE MONEY GOES TO THE 29 00:01:38,820 --> 00:01:42,457 LOS ANGELES DODGERS FOUNDATION. SO I DID IT, AND THEY GAVE ME A 30 00:01:42,457 --> 00:01:47,396 GREAT SPOT BEHIND HOME PLATE, UNTIL I WAS ABRUPTLY REMOVED AND 31 00:01:47,396 --> 00:01:54,236 REPLACED WITH ‐‐ A CARDBOARD CUTOUT OF GUILLERMO. 32 00:01:54,236 --> 00:01:58,807 I SWEAR, THIS IS NOT A JOKE. THIS ACTUALLY HAPPENED AND IT 33 00:01:58,807 --> 00:02:02,377 WAS UNACCEPTABLE ON EVERY LEVEL. BUT I RECEIVED AN OUTPOURING OF 34 00:02:02,377 --> 00:02:04,446 SUPPORT ON THE THOUGHTFUL AND BENEVOLENT MEDIUM KNOWN AS 35 00:02:04,446 --> 00:02:10,852 TWITTER WHEN THE HASHTAG LOWE WAS ROBBED TRENDED LOCALLY FOR 36 00:02:10,852 --> 00:02:14,823 ALMOST 14 MINUTES. PEOPLE WERE PRETTY FIRED UP, AS 37 00:02:14,823 --> 00:02:23,865 YOU CAN SEE. 38 00:02:23,865 --> 00:02:27,469 >> HEY, DODGE ARES WHAT'S UP WITH THIS? 39 00:02:27,469 --> 00:02:32,941 HAVE YOU SEEN "ST. ELMO'S FIRE"? IT'S A GOOD QUESTION, I'M NOT 40 00:02:32,941 --> 00:02:37,579 SURE THEY HAVE. DODGERS, YOU SHOULD HAVE PUT 41 00:02:37,579 --> 00:02:42,150 THAT IN THE DUMPSTER. HEY, WHY DO YOU HAVE FROSTED 42 00:02:42,150 --> 00:02:45,087 TIPS IN 2020. I THINK WE'RE GETTING OFF THE 43 00:02:45,087 --> 00:02:48,156 POINT, BUT YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT WE'RE SAYING. 44 00:02:48,156 --> 00:02:54,396 AND, AS IT TURNS OUT, THE DODGERS DID THE RIDE GHT THING 45 00:02:54,396 --> 00:02:58,367 BASED ON YOUR SUPPORT. LOOK AT THESE TWO. 46 00:02:58,367 --> 00:02:59,401 THE BEST OF FRIENDS. GUILLERMO, ARE YOU GOOD WITH 47 00:02:59,401 --> 00:03:02,304 THIS NEW ARRANGEMENT? 48 00:03:02,304 --> 00:03:05,741 >> Guillermo: IF YOU'RE HAPPY, I'M HAPPY. 49 00:03:05,741 --> 00:03:10,846 >> Rob: GREAT, GOOD. AND JUST TO SHOW THERE'S NO ILL 50 00:03:10,846 --> 00:03:17,953 WILL BETWEEN OUR TWO‐DIMENSIONAL SELVES, THEY EVEN SHARED A SNACK 51 00:03:17,953 --> 00:03:18,787 TOGETHER. AND, IF I MAY, THERE'S BEEN A 52 00:03:18,787 --> 00:03:20,756 LOT OF TALK AROUND THE WORLD ABOUT WHETHER DEMOCRACY STILL 53 00:03:20,756 --> 00:03:22,824 WORKS. WELL TODAY WE HAVE THE ANSWER. 54 00:03:22,824 --> 00:03:26,795 YES, IT DOES. IN THIS VERY LIMITED, ME‐CENTRIC 55 00:03:26,795 --> 00:03:32,367 WAY. DEMOCRACY WORKS. 56 00:03:32,367 --> 00:03:36,438 IF YOU'RE RICH AND FAMOUS. WELL NOW THAT WE'VE TURNED 57 00:03:36,438 --> 00:03:38,507 BASEBALL INTO A CIVICS LESSON, YOU KNOW WHAT EVERYONE ELSE HAS 58 00:03:38,507 --> 00:03:42,477 APPARENTLY BEEN DOING DURING THE PANDEMIC? RECREATIONAL DRUGS. 59 00:03:42,477 --> 00:03:46,648 IT'S TRUE. MARIJUANA SALES AND EDIBLES ARE 60 00:03:46,648 --> 00:03:48,483 WAY UP. I DON'T PARTAKE OF COURSE, BUT I 61 00:03:48,483 --> 00:03:51,052 WAS IN “SUPER TROOPERS 2,” WHICH CLEARLY MAKES ME A STONER BY 62 00:03:51,052 --> 00:03:55,023 PROXY. AND WITH THAT SAID, IT'S TIME 63 00:03:55,023 --> 00:03:59,227 FOR A SPECIAL QUARANTINE EDITION OF THE CLASSIC “JIMMY KIMMEL 64 00:03:59,227 --> 00:04:04,599 LIVE” GAME “WHO'S HIGH?” THE RULES ARE SIMPLE. 65 00:04:04,599 --> 00:04:08,503 THREE PEOPLE WILL POP UP ONSCREEN. ONE OF THEM IS HIGH. 66 00:04:08,503 --> 00:04:10,772 THE OTHER TWO ARE NOT. MY JOB IS TO FIGURE OUT WHO'S 67 00:04:10,772 --> 00:04:14,843 HIGH, HENCE THE NAME OF THE GAME. 68 00:04:14,843 --> 00:04:20,048 LETS MEET OUR FIRST CONTESTANTS. 69 00:04:20,048 --> 00:04:26,488 THIS IS VAN, KAREN, AND DEVON. LET'S FIGURE OUT WHO'S HIGH. 70 00:04:26,488 --> 00:04:30,459 BAN, DO YOU HAVE ANY PETS, 71 00:04:30,459 --> 00:04:34,563 SPECIFICALLY, REPTILES? 72 00:04:34,563 --> 00:04:36,031 >> NO. 73 00:04:36,031 --> 00:04:38,700 >> Rob: TOOK YOU A WHILE TO ANSWER THAT, BRO. 74 00:04:38,700 --> 00:04:44,673 >> IT'S KIND OF A COMPLICATED QUESTION, BECAUSE I DO, BUT NOT 75 00:04:44,673 --> 00:04:45,038 HERE. 76 00:04:45,038 --> 00:04:49,177 >> Rob: ARE YOU LIVING, BAN, ARE YOU LIVING A DOUBLE LIFE? 77 00:04:49,177 --> 00:04:51,513 >> YEAH, KIND OF. 78 00:04:51,513 --> 00:04:54,516 >> Rob: BAN, I NEED TO ASK YOU, ARE YOU AWARE THAT YOU'RE 79 00:04:54,516 --> 00:04:58,820 WEARING A RIDICULOUS HAT? 80 00:04:58,820 --> 00:05:00,121 >> YEAH. 81 00:05:00,121 --> 00:05:04,960 >> Rob: BAN'S, I THINK YOU'RE THE MAN TO BEAT AT THE MOMENT, 82 00:05:04,960 --> 00:05:07,362 MY FRIEND. BUT I'M GOING TO MOVE ON HERE. 83 00:05:07,362 --> 00:05:14,569 I'M GOING TO ASK DEVON. DEVON. HOW MANY TV SHOWS IN THE NCIS 84 00:05:14,569 --> 00:05:19,074 UNIVERSE CAN YOU NAME? 85 00:05:19,074 --> 00:05:22,677 >> JUST "NCIS," SO JUST ONE. 86 00:05:22,677 --> 00:05:25,514 >> Rob: HMM, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO MAKE OF THAT. 87 00:05:25,514 --> 00:05:28,783 OKAY, GOOD, GOOD. KAREN, WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A 88 00:05:28,783 --> 00:05:29,116 LIVING? 89 00:05:29,116 --> 00:05:30,652 >> I'M IN ADVERTISING. 90 00:05:30,652 --> 00:05:34,222 >> Rob: YOU COULD BE HIGH DOING THAT. 91 00:05:34,222 --> 00:05:36,124 SO, THAT DOES NOT RULE YOU OUT. 92 00:05:36,124 --> 00:05:36,591 >> OKAY. 93 00:05:36,591 --> 00:05:42,397 >> Rob: OKAY, I'M GOING TO GO BACK TO BAN, BECAUSE I HAVE HUGE 94 00:05:42,397 --> 00:05:48,537 SUSPICIONS. BAN, HOW DRY IS YOUR MOUTH RIGHT 95 00:05:48,537 --> 00:05:51,473 NOW? WAIT, WHAT IS THAT? HOLD THAT UP AGAIN. 96 00:05:51,473 --> 00:05:56,678 WHAT DO YOU HAVE NEXT TO YOU? WHAT'S IN THERE? 97 00:05:56,678 --> 00:06:00,315 IT'S HIM, HE'S HIGH, HE'S DRUNK. HE'S DRINKING THAT. 98 00:06:00,315 --> 00:06:06,454 I AM GOING WITH BAN. BAN, YOU'RE HIGH, AM I RIGHT? 99 00:06:06,454 --> 00:06:08,557 >> NO! 100 00:06:08,557 --> 00:06:11,259 >> Rob: KAREN! THANK YOU ALL FOR PLAYING BY THE 101 00:06:11,259 --> 00:06:13,161 WAY. YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE A PRIZE. 102 00:06:13,161 --> 00:06:15,697 SO WHAT DOES OUR GROUP HERE GET? 103 00:06:15,697 --> 00:06:20,569 >> Dicky: A BAG OF BUGLES CRISPY CORN SNACKS, THE ONLY SNACK YOU 104 00:06:20,569 --> 00:06:22,837 CAN STICK ON YOUR FINGERS. 105 00:06:22,837 --> 00:06:25,874 >> Rob: HERE'S OUR NEXT GROUP OF THREE. 106 00:06:25,874 --> 00:06:29,744 WE'VE GOT JOSH, AND WE'VE GOT MIKE, OH, AND LLOYD, THERE YOU 107 00:06:29,744 --> 00:06:30,109 ARE. 108 00:06:30,109 --> 00:06:33,214 >> COME ON, LLOYD, WHERE YOU AT? 109 00:06:33,214 --> 00:06:39,120 >> Rob: JUST BY THE LOOKS OF YAs, Y'ALL ARE LIKELY CANDIDATES. 110 00:06:39,120 --> 00:06:45,594 THAT'S ALL I'M GOING TO SAY. MIKE, I NEED TO SAYKNOW WHAT YO 111 00:06:45,594 --> 00:06:47,095 INSPIRATION WAS FOR GROWING THAT BEARD. 112 00:06:47,095 --> 00:06:54,536 >> OH, MAN, I'VE HAD THIS BEARD FOR PROBABLY 25 YEARS. 113 00:06:54,536 --> 00:06:58,440 >> Rob: HOW OLD ARE YOU, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, HOW OLD ARE YOU? 114 00:06:58,440 --> 00:07:02,844 >> MAYBE I'M 25. I'M 30 YEARS. 115 00:07:02,844 --> 00:07:06,414 >> Rob: A, YOU HAVE SOME KIND OF DISORDER, BECAUSE YOUR HAIR'S 116 00:07:06,414 --> 00:07:10,585 NOT GROWING QUICK ENOUGH, AND ALSO I NEED TO KNOW HOW OLD YOU 117 00:07:10,585 --> 00:07:10,950 ARE. 118 00:07:10,950 --> 00:07:17,292 >> IT'S LIKE A CHIA PET, LIKE A BONSAI TREE, IT'S VERY 119 00:07:17,292 --> 00:07:18,660 THERAPEUTIC KEEPING THIS THING TRIMMED. 120 00:07:18,660 --> 00:07:23,298 >> Rob: YOU'VE ALREADY MENTIONED BONSAI AND CHIA PET. 121 00:07:23,298 --> 00:07:28,136 I'M GOING TO MOVE ON, REGARDING PIZZA, PINEAPPLE ON THE PIZZA OR 122 00:07:28,136 --> 00:07:30,405 ABSOLUTELY NO PINEAPPLE ON THE PIZZA? 123 00:07:30,405 --> 00:07:35,076 >> OH, I LOVE PINEAPPLE. COME ON, NOW. 124 00:07:35,076 --> 00:07:39,948 >> Rob: THAT ALSO PUTS YOU IN THE CATEGORY OF VERY LIKELY TO 125 00:07:39,948 --> 00:07:42,517 BE HIGH. LLOYD, I'M GOING TO MOVE ON TO 126 00:07:42,517 --> 00:07:46,821 YOU THEN, FIRST OF ALL, LLOYD, WHAT DO YOU DO FOR A LIVING? 127 00:07:46,821 --> 00:07:52,327 >> FISHING DIRECTOR, LINE FISHER. JIMMY KIMMEL'S NEXT STAGE 128 00:07:52,327 --> 00:07:52,692 MANAGER. 129 00:07:52,692 --> 00:07:55,964 >> Rob: A DIRECTOR AND LINE PRODUCER WHO CANNOT FIGURE OUT 130 00:07:55,964 --> 00:07:58,800 HOW TO GET PIPED IN TO A TELEVISION SHOW. 131 00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:03,138 YOU MAY NOT BE COMING BACK AFTER COVID, BRO, I GOT NEWS FOR YOU. 132 00:08:03,138 --> 00:08:08,943 ENJOY THE NEW CAREER. AUDIENCE WATCHING AT HOME, DO 133 00:08:08,943 --> 00:08:12,047 YOU HAVE A VOTE? I THINK I'M READY FOR MY VOTE, 134 00:08:12,047 --> 00:08:16,618 AND VERY TO GO WITH THE TELEVISION PROFESSIONAL WHO 135 00:08:16,618 --> 00:08:20,422 CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO LOG‐IN TO THIS CONVERSATION. 136 00:08:20,422 --> 00:08:26,428 LLOYD, I THINK YOU'RE HIGH AF. LLOYD, YOU STILL WITH US? 137 00:08:26,428 --> 00:08:30,565 >> WELL, ACTUALLY, YES. 138 00:08:30,565 --> 00:08:34,669 >> Rob: ACTUALLY, YEAH. I GO OUT A WINNER. 139 00:08:34,669 --> 00:08:38,907 THANK YOU, THANK YOU FOR PLAYING. DICKEY, GIVE THESE MEN A PRIZE. 140 00:08:38,907 --> 00:08:46,848 >> Dicky: GENTLY‐USED FINL ET 141 00:08:46,848 --> 00:08:47,615 CETERA SPINNERS. 142 00:08:47,615 --> 00:08:50,852 >> Rob: WE HAVE A GREAT SHOW COMING UP, MUSIC FROM DAWES, AND 143 00:08:50,852 --> 00:08:56,691 WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH RAMI YUSEF. 144 00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:05,347 ♪ 145 00:09:05,347 --> 00:09:07,820 >> Rob: WELCOME BACK TO “JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE,” I'M HOST, 146 00:09:07,820 --> 00:09:10,256 ROB LOWE. IF YOU'RE LIKING ANY OF THE 147 00:09:10,256 --> 00:09:15,762 SKILLS I'M DISPLAYING TONIGHT, I 148 00:09:15,762 --> 00:09:20,967 WANT YOU TO CHECK OUT MY PODCAST. 149 00:09:20,967 --> 00:09:27,440 IT HAS THE VERY SMART AND PROVOCATIVE, DEMI MOORE. 150 00:09:27,440 --> 00:09:29,575 “LITERALLY! WITH ROB LOWE” AS WE SPEAK. SO CHECK THAT OUT. 151 00:09:29,575 --> 00:09:30,676 IN JUST A LITTLE BIT, A GREAT BAND FROM RIGHT HERE IN 152 00:09:30,676 --> 00:09:31,677 LOS ANGELES. THEIR NEW ALBUM, “GOOD LUCK WITH 153 00:09:31,677 --> 00:09:34,547 WHATEVER,” COMES OUT OCTOBER 2ND. MUSIC FROM DAWES IS ON THE WAY. 154 00:09:34,547 --> 00:09:36,115 AND NEXT WEEK, THE SHOW HAS A GREAT LINE UP OF GUEST HOSTS 155 00:09:36,115 --> 00:09:42,362 INCLUDING KERRY WASHINGTON, BEN PLATT, AND THE RETURN OF 156 00:09:42,362 --> 00:09:47,433 ANTHONY ANDERSON. OUR GUEST TONIGHT IS THE 157 00:09:47,433 --> 00:09:52,839 CREATOR, PRODUCER, DIRECTOR AND TITLE CHARACTER OF THE EXCELLENT 158 00:09:52,839 --> 00:09:57,310 HULU SHOW “RAMY,” ON WHICH HE STARS AS A SELF‐DOUBTING, AND 159 00:09:57,310 --> 00:10:01,180 FREQUENTLY SELF‐PLEASURING, YOUNG EGYPTIAN‐AMERICAN MUSLIM 160 00:10:01,180 --> 00:10:05,952 LIVING WITH HIS PARENTS IN NEW JERSEY. 161 00:10:05,952 --> 00:10:11,124 I MEAN, THAT SOUNDS LIKE A SHOW I'VE SEEN BEFORE, BUT I'M SURE 162 00:10:11,124 --> 00:10:13,927 HE'S DONE SOMETHING NEW WITH IT. HE'S ALREADY WON A GOLDEN GLOBE 163 00:10:13,927 --> 00:10:17,730 AND NOW HE'S NOMINATED FOR TWO EMMY AWARDS, TOO. 164 00:10:17,730 --> 00:10:22,902 I HATE THIS GUY ALREADY. PLEASE WELCOME RAMY YOUSSEF. 165 00:10:22,902 --> 00:10:25,872 >> DUDE, SO GOOD TO SEE YOU, MAN. 166 00:10:25,872 --> 00:10:32,278 >> Rob: YOUR SHOW, HOW DOES A SHOW THAT TRIULY ORIGINAL GET O 167 00:10:32,278 --> 00:10:32,845 THE AIR? 168 00:10:32,845 --> 00:10:36,516 >> WE JUST TELL THEM, DUDE, YOU DON'T HAVE ANOTHER ONE LIKE IT. 169 00:10:36,516 --> 00:10:40,286 IT'S THE THING WHERE WE SAW THERE'S AN OPPORTUNITY FOR 170 00:10:40,286 --> 00:10:43,823 PEOPLE TO SEE AN ARAB MUSLIM CHARACTER IN A REAL WAY. 171 00:10:43,823 --> 00:10:49,128 I DIDN'T GROW UP WITH ANY ARAB MUSLIM CHARACTERS ON TV. 172 00:10:49,128 --> 00:10:51,030 WE HAD "ALADDIN." YOU KNOW, HE HAD THE CARPET, AND 173 00:10:51,030 --> 00:10:54,801 WE KNEW IT FLEW, BUT WE WEREN'T SURE, DOES HE PRAY ON IT? 174 00:10:54,801 --> 00:10:56,302 WE DON'T KNOW. 175 00:10:56,302 --> 00:10:58,438 >> Rob: YOU'RE LIKE AN AWARDS MAGNET. 176 00:10:58,438 --> 00:11:02,942 WHEN I WORKED WITH ALLISON JANNEY ON "THE WEST WING", SHE 177 00:11:02,942 --> 00:11:05,778 WAS LIKE THAT. SHE COULD NOT STOP WINNING 178 00:11:05,778 --> 00:11:07,547 AWARDS. YOU'RE THE SAME, YOU'VE ALREADY 179 00:11:07,547 --> 00:11:12,885 WON A GOLDEN GLOBE, UP FOR TWO EMMIES. 180 00:11:12,885 --> 00:11:17,924 WHAT IS IT LIKE, YOU'RE ON YOUR WAY TO BEING THE YOUNGER, 181 00:11:17,924 --> 00:11:19,425 MUSLIM, MERYL STREEP, HOW DOES THAT FEEL? 182 00:11:19,425 --> 00:11:24,897 >> IT'S A LITTLE OVERWHELMING, BECAUSE PEOPLE COMPARE ME TO HER 183 00:11:24,897 --> 00:11:26,733 SO MUCH. IT'S CONSTANTLY ME AND HER IN 184 00:11:26,733 --> 00:11:31,237 THE SAME CONVO, SO YEAH, I TRY TO FOCUS ON MY LANE AND NOT TRY 185 00:11:31,237 --> 00:11:34,474 TO EMULATE HERS, BUT YEAH, IT'S JUST KIND OF THE PATH THAT'S 186 00:11:34,474 --> 00:11:35,608 BEEN HAPPENING. 187 00:11:35,608 --> 00:11:39,178 >> Rob: DID YOU EVER HAVE A MOMENT WHEN THEY'RE UP THERE 188 00:11:39,178 --> 00:11:42,448 READING THE ENVELOPE, AND YOU'RE EITHER CONVINCED YOU'RE GOING TO 189 00:11:42,448 --> 00:11:45,551 WIN OR CONVINCED YOU'RE NOT GOING TO WIN? 190 00:11:45,551 --> 00:11:47,653 BECAUSE I HAVE A LOT OF THOSE MOMENTS. 191 00:11:47,653 --> 00:11:51,791 MY MOMENTS ARE, OH, HERE'S ANOTHER ONE I'M NOT GOING TO WIN. 192 00:11:51,791 --> 00:11:54,160 SIX‐TIME GOLDEN GLOBE FAILLURE. TEACH ME. 193 00:11:54,160 --> 00:11:59,365 WHAT IS IT LAKIKE TO ACTUALLY W. 194 00:11:59,365 --> 00:12:04,103 >> YOU'RE SO TALL AND CHISELLED. YOU LOOK LIKE THE GLOBE I WON. 195 00:12:04,103 --> 00:12:10,810 YOU HAVE THE LOOK, SO THAT'S ALL THAT I REALLY THINK YOU HSHOULD 196 00:12:10,810 --> 00:12:13,913 FEEL GOOD ABOUT THAT. I NEED IT MORE THAN YOU, FOR 197 00:12:13,913 --> 00:12:16,949 SURE. THOSE MOMENTS ARE TOTALLY DIFFERENT, MAN, BECAUSE I KNEW 198 00:12:16,949 --> 00:12:21,220 THE GLOBE I WAS GOING TO WIN, BECAUSE I SAW JENNIFER ANISTON 199 00:12:21,220 --> 00:12:25,224 JUST LIKE LOOKING AT THE CARD WHEN SHE OPENED, SHE WAS JUST 200 00:12:25,224 --> 00:12:29,062 KIND OF LOOKING AT IT LIKE, LIKE I SAW THIS LOOK THAT I'VE SEEN 201 00:12:29,062 --> 00:12:33,299 ON EVERY SUBSTITUTE TEACHER'S FACE WHEN THEY CAME TO MY NAME. 202 00:12:33,299 --> 00:12:36,669 OH, MY GOD, IT'S ME. I KNOW SHE WAS ABOUT TO SAY A 203 00:12:36,669 --> 00:12:39,806 NAME SHE KNEW, AND WAS LIKE, WHO IS IT? 204 00:12:39,806 --> 00:12:42,642 AND THEN REESE CAME IN AND SAVED THE DAY. 205 00:12:42,642 --> 00:12:46,446 THERE WERE TWO SECONDS WHEN I WAS LIKE, OH, MY GOD, I KNOW 206 00:12:46,446 --> 00:12:46,946 THAT FACE. 207 00:12:46,946 --> 00:12:50,583 >> Rob: IF ONLY YOU COULD HAVE GOTTEN A BET DOWN IN VEGAS ON 208 00:12:50,583 --> 00:12:53,653 YOUR PHONE. I'M SURE, WERE YOU THE ODDS‐ON 209 00:12:53,653 --> 00:12:57,623 FAVORITE TO STEAL THIS CATEGORY AS A NEWCOMER? 210 00:12:57,623 --> 00:13:00,426 >> I WAS NOT. I ACTUALLY KNOW, BECAUSE MY 211 00:13:00,426 --> 00:13:07,033 BUDDY, STEVE WEI, WHO'S ON MY SHOW, HIS UNCLE BOB BET ON ME, 212 00:13:07,033 --> 00:13:09,268 AND SO UNCLE BOB BET FROM THE HEART. 213 00:13:09,268 --> 00:13:11,971 I THINK HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN ONE OF THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO WON. 214 00:13:11,971 --> 00:13:15,208 >> Rob: I ALSO HEARD A STORY, I CAN'T BELIEVE IT'S TRUE, BUT 215 00:13:15,208 --> 00:13:18,811 IT'S SO INSANE IT HAS TO BE. IN YOUR CATEGORY WAS MICHAEL 216 00:13:18,811 --> 00:13:22,115 DOUGLAS, AND YOUR MOTHER WAS ROOTING FOR MICHAEL DOUGLAS? 217 00:13:22,115 --> 00:13:27,220 >> THE THING, LIKE EGYPTIANS LOVE MICHAEL DOUGLAS, THIS IS 218 00:13:27,220 --> 00:13:33,259 NEWS THAT'S NOT OUT THERE ABOUT US. BIG, BIG MICHAEL DOUGLAS FAN, 219 00:13:33,259 --> 00:13:36,295 AND SHE'S LIKE, HE HAS MORE MOVIES THAN YOU. 220 00:13:36,295 --> 00:13:39,899 AND I TRIED TO TELL HER, THAT'S NOT HOW THEY DO IT, IT'S ABOUT 221 00:13:39,899 --> 00:13:44,737 THIS YEAR, THESE SHOWS. SHE WAS VERY HAPPY. 222 00:13:44,737 --> 00:13:52,345 >> Rob: IT'S FUNNY, I WENT TO EGYPT BRIEFLY, AND EVERY NIGHT 223 00:13:52,345 --> 00:13:56,415 THEY PIPED IN THE THEME FROM "ROMANCING THE STONE." 224 00:13:56,415 --> 00:13:59,418 SO THAT MAKES PERFECT SINCE. 225 00:13:59,418 --> 00:14:01,287 >> CLASSIC TRADITION. 226 00:14:01,287 --> 00:14:03,222 >> Rob: WHO IS SHE ROOTING FOR THIS YEAR? 227 00:14:03,222 --> 00:14:05,725 IS SHE ACTUALLY GOING FOR YOU. 228 00:14:05,725 --> 00:14:09,328 >> SHE'S GOING FOR ME ALL THE WAY. 229 00:14:09,328 --> 00:14:13,432 I TALKED TO MY AUNT IN EGYPT. ALL OF EGYPT IS PRAYING FOR THE 230 00:14:13,432 --> 00:14:13,900 EMMY. 231 00:14:13,900 --> 00:14:17,336 >> Rob: THAT'S A LOT OF PRAYER. 232 00:14:17,336 --> 00:14:24,777 >> I'M SURE EUGENE LIEVY HAS SOE PRAYERS. 233 00:14:24,777 --> 00:14:29,081 >> Rob: IN ALL SERIOUSNESS, MY SON A YOUNG WRITER AND ACTOR. 234 00:14:29,081 --> 00:14:35,454 IT'S GUYS LIKE YOU THAT I POINT HIM TOWARDS AS GREAT ROLE MODELS. 235 00:14:35,454 --> 00:14:38,224 I REALLY MEAN THIS. FOR ANYBODY WHO WANTS TO BE AN 236 00:14:38,224 --> 00:14:40,826 ACTOR OR WHATEVER. YOU MAKE IT HAPPEN, YOU DIDN'T 237 00:14:40,826 --> 00:14:43,429 SIT AROUND AND WAIT FOR THE RIGHT ROLE TO COME AROUND, YOU 238 00:14:43,429 --> 00:14:46,032 BUILT IT FOR YOURSELF. I CAN'T TELL YOU HOW GREAT I 239 00:14:46,032 --> 00:14:51,437 THAT I IS AND HOW MUCH I LOVE THE SUCCESS YOU'RE HAVING. 240 00:14:51,437 --> 00:14:53,973 THIS WHOLE THING HAS MADE ME DEHYDRATED. 241 00:14:53,973 --> 00:14:55,975 I'M GOING TO TAKE A LITTLE ‐‐ 242 00:14:55,975 --> 00:14:59,245 >> YEAH, WE GOT TO JUST GET SOME. YEAH. 243 00:14:59,245 --> 00:15:01,314 >> Rob: LOOK AT YOU GETTING ALL COMPETITIVE. 244 00:15:01,314 --> 00:15:04,951 >> YEAH, MINE'S NOT, YOU DON'T NEED THE GLOBE. 245 00:15:04,951 --> 00:15:07,787 YOU'VE GOT THE BIGGER, YEAH, WE GET IT. 246 00:15:07,787 --> 00:15:11,891 >> Rob: YOU KNOW, I'D RATHER HAVE A BIGGER WATER BOTTLE THAN 247 00:15:11,891 --> 00:15:17,930 GOLDEN GLOBE ANY DAY, AND ANYBODY WHO KNOWS ME THAT KNOWS 248 00:15:17,930 --> 00:15:18,295 THAT. 249 00:15:18,295 --> 00:15:20,466 >> THAT'S WHY YOUR SKIN'S SO CLEAR. 250 00:15:20,466 --> 00:15:25,004 >> Rob: GOOD LUCK AT THE EMMIES, I WILL BE ROOTING FOR YOU EVEN 251 00:15:25,004 --> 00:15:25,504 IF YOUR PARENTS AREN'T. 252 00:15:25,504 --> 00:15:26,872 >> THANKS, ROB. 253 00:15:26,872 --> 00:15:31,644 >> Rob: WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK WITH MUSIC FROM DAWES. 254 00:15:31,644 --> 00:15:31,977 ♪ 255 00:15:32,211 --> 00:15:35,414 >> Dicky: THE "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" CONCERT SERIES IS 256 00:15:35,414 --> 00:15:36,716 PRESENTED BY MERCEDES BENZ, THE BEST OR NOTHING. 257 00:15:43,700 --> 00:15:44,437 >> Dicky: THE "JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE" CONCERT SERIES IS 258 00:15:44,437 --> 00:15:48,975 PRESENTED BY MERCEDES BENZ, THE BEST OR NOTHING. 259 00:15:48,975 --> 00:15:52,846 >> Rob: WELCOME BACK TO “JIMMY KIMMEL LIVE.” 260 00:15:52,846 --> 00:15:55,148 I'M ROB LOWE. MY NEXT GUESTS HAULED ALL THEIR 261 00:15:55,148 --> 00:15:56,116 BAND GEAR UP TO THE ROOF FOR THIS. 262 00:15:56,116 --> 00:15:59,085 THEIR ALBUM, “GOOD LUCK WITH WHATEVER,” COMES OUT OCTOBER 2ND. 263 00:15:59,085 --> 00:16:04,357 PLAYING, “WHO DO YOU THINK YOU'RE TALKING TO,” DAWES! 264 00:16:04,357 --> 00:16:05,125 ♪ 265 00:16:05,125 --> 00:16:06,926 ♪ WHO WHO DO YOU THINK 266 00:16:06,926 --> 00:16:12,966 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO IS IT THE MAN THAT 267 00:16:12,966 --> 00:16:16,036 WAS HERE BEFORE ME ♪ 268 00:16:16,036 --> 00:16:17,137 ♪ THE ONE WHO WRECKED 269 00:16:17,137 --> 00:16:21,141 YOUR HEART AND WALKED CAUSE IF IT IS 270 00:16:21,141 --> 00:16:31,017 THEN I'LL LET YOU TALK ♪ 271 00:16:31,017 --> 00:16:32,152 ♪ IT'S CLEAR THAT'S 272 00:16:32,152 --> 00:16:39,392 SOMETHING YOU'RE STILL WORKING THROUGH ♪ 273 00:16:39,392 --> 00:16:39,859 ♪ BUT WHO WHO DO YOU 274 00:16:39,859 --> 00:16:40,960 THINK YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ♪ 275 00:16:40,960 --> 00:16:41,528 ♪ WHERE WHERE DO YOU THINK 276 00:16:41,528 --> 00:16:45,131 YOU ARE RIGHT NOW IS THERE A REASON YOU'RE 277 00:16:45,131 --> 00:16:45,698 STILL DIGGING UP THE PAST ♪ 278 00:16:45,698 --> 00:16:48,968 ♪ BECAUSE YOU HAVEN'T 279 00:16:48,968 --> 00:16:52,338 TOUCHED YOUR DRINK AND YOU HAVEN'T 280 00:16:52,338 --> 00:16:55,008 STOPPED TO THINK ♪ 281 00:16:55,008 --> 00:16:57,143 ♪ IF I HOLD YOU BACK FROM 282 00:16:57,143 --> 00:17:01,481 ANYONE THAT CARES FOR YOU BUT WHO WHO DO YOU THINK 283 00:17:01,481 --> 00:17:05,151 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ♪ 284 00:17:05,151 --> 00:17:07,020 ♪ WHAT DO YOU WANT ME 285 00:17:07,020 --> 00:17:12,759 TO SAY TO THIS FRANKLY I THINK WE WOULD BE REMISS ♪ 286 00:17:12,759 --> 00:17:13,226 ♪ IF WE DON'T REMIND 287 00:17:13,226 --> 00:17:17,397 OURSELVES TO SHARE THE PAINFUL MEMORIES TOO 288 00:17:17,397 --> 00:17:22,168 SO BABY TELL ME WHO ♪ 289 00:17:22,168 --> 00:17:24,971 ♪ DO YOU NEED 290 00:17:24,971 --> 00:17:29,242 TO BE ALONE CAN YOU FIND YOUR OWN RIDE HOME ♪ 291 00:17:29,242 --> 00:17:30,977 ♪ AND IS THAT STILL 292 00:17:30,977 --> 00:17:35,682 A HOUSE THAT YOU CAN'T BEAR TO LEAVE ♪ 293 00:17:35,682 --> 00:17:37,083 ♪ DOES HIS COAT 294 00:17:37,083 --> 00:17:41,154 HANG IN THE HALL ARE HIS PICTURES ON THE WALL ♪ 295 00:17:41,154 --> 00:17:42,922 ♪ AND IS THERE ONE 296 00:17:42,922 --> 00:17:48,928 OF US YOU'RE TRYING TO DECEIVE ♪ 297 00:17:48,928 --> 00:17:53,133 ♪ OH BABE THE TRAINS WILL 298 00:17:53,133 --> 00:17:55,502 ALL STOP RUNNING SOON I DON'T KNOW HOW LONG IT'S 299 00:17:55,502 --> 00:17:59,906 BEEN SINCE YOU WALKED AWAY ♪ 300 00:17:59,906 --> 00:18:00,974 ♪ AND AFTER ALL 301 00:18:00,974 --> 00:18:07,046 I'VE SAID SO FAR THE TENDER OF THIS BAR ♪ 302 00:18:07,046 --> 00:18:08,581 ♪ SAYS THE ONLY PEOPLE 303 00:18:08,581 --> 00:18:11,184 LEFT HERE MAN ARE ME AND YOU ♪ 304 00:18:11,184 --> 00:18:14,888 ♪ SO BUDDY WHO 305 00:18:14,888 --> 00:18:18,992 WHO DO YOU THINK YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ♪ 306 00:18:18,992 --> 00:18:21,127 ♪ WHAT DO YOU WANT ME 307 00:18:21,127 --> 00:18:24,998 TO SAY TO THIS FRANKLY I THINK WE WOULD BE REMISS ♪ 308 00:18:24,998 --> 00:18:27,667 ♪ IF WE DON'T REMIND 309 00:18:27,667 --> 00:18:30,937 OURSELVES TO SHARE THE PAINFUL MEMORIES TOO 310 00:18:30,937 --> 00:18:34,774 SO BABY TELL ME WHO ♪ 311 00:18:34,774 --> 00:18:36,109 ♪ WHO DO YOU THINK 312 00:18:36,109 --> 00:18:39,445 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO WHO DO YOU THINK 313 00:18:39,445 --> 00:18:40,914 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ♪ 314 00:18:40,914 --> 00:18:41,347 ♪ WHO DO YOU THINK 315 00:18:41,347 --> 00:18:45,151 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO WHO DO YOU THINK 316 00:18:45,151 --> 00:18:46,653 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ♪ 317 00:18:46,653 --> 00:18:48,288 ♪ WHO DO YOU THINK 318 00:18:48,288 --> 00:18:51,157 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO WHO DO YOU THINK 319 00:18:51,157 --> 00:18:51,591 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ♪ 320 00:18:51,591 --> 00:18:53,126 ♪ WHO DO YOU THINK 321 00:18:53,126 --> 00:18:57,130 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO WHO DO YOU THINK 322 00:18:57,130 --> 00:19:00,567 YOU'RE TALKIN' TO ♪ 323 00:19:13,787 --> 00:19:16,324 >> Rob: WELL, THAT'S ALL THE TIME WE HAVE. 324 00:19:16,324 --> 00:19:19,794 I'D LIKE TO THANK RAMY YOUSSEF, DAWES AND MY IDENTICAL TWIN, 325 00:19:19,794 --> 00:19:23,297 JIMMY KIMMEL. “NIGHTLINE” IS NEXT. 326 00:19:23,297 --> 00:19:25,833 YOU MAY NOW GO TO SLEEP, HAVE A PANIC ATTACK OR MAYBE SOME FUN 327 00:19:25,833 --> 00:19:29,333 COMBINATION OF THE TWO. GOODNIGHT. ADIOS. 27245

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