All language subtitles for Celebrity Masterchef - 1x02_track3_eng

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15 years, two judges,
you and me, Gregg,

over 300 celebrities and literally

thousands of plates of food.

Some of them have been great...

I love it. Yes!

..some of them, not so great.

Oh, God! Sorry.

We've trawled our vaults to bring
some of our favourite moments

from the past... Bosh!

..and picked some of our most
memorable challenges to share

with everybody in full.

It's all here.
The kitchen meltdowns...

Oh!

..the chaos...

Oh!Oh!

Ah! Come on!

Stop it, I'm trying to get it right.

..the singing, the dancing...

# Stop, wait a minute,
Mr Postman... #

..and of course the
food disasters...

..and the triumphs.

Delicious. Ah, really?

Sharpen the knives,
light the stoves,

it's 15 years of
Celebrity MasterChef.

Come on!

Don't panic, Mr Mainwaring.

Cooking doesn't get
funnier than this.

In tonight's show, it's out
of the frying pan and into the fire.

I've never even sunbathed
so this is too hot for me!

From the cuts...

..and the burns... Ow!

Yeah, that hurt.

..to the meltdowns, disasters...

Guys, the gas has gone out,

you're going to have a whole
restaurant full of people.

..and triumphs.I'll tell you what,
sack the day job.

We look back as the celebrities
are pushed to their limits,

in their first experience
of a professional kitchen.

I don't have two minutes,
I've got one.

Running in an Olympic Games
is far easier than this

because I have four years' worth
of preparation, not four hours!

And we revisit a classic
MasterChef challenge,

involving Janet Street-Porter,
Ade Edmondson and Les Dennis.

Why can't we just start
without the meat?

No, we're not starting,
we'll wait.

We don't know...Just shut up.

I feel like I'm in
an operating theatre.

One of the things about
Celebrity MasterChef that always

surprises our celebs
is just how tough it is.

They think they're going to walk
in here and have a nice time?

Hell, no.

I don't want to go in!
And we don't hold back.

Right from the start, when often
they've only cooked for us once,

we expose them to the toughest
culinary challenge there is.

That is the heat of
a restaurant kitchen.

We are unleashing you
on the paying public.

What, already?

The look on their faces when we
announce it, it's always priceless.

Are they insured?

But nothing compares to the actual
experience itself.

Up at the crack of dawn

because, of course, work in
a pro kitchen starts early.

No celeb likes
an early start, Gregg.

We're just going to give it our all.
Give it a go.

This is it. Oh, very smart!

All I knew is, it's all going
to be equally terrifying!

Good luck, everybody.

It's a steep learning curve,
this challenge.

Look at that, look at this, look!

They'll get taught a dish
that they will have to

prepare from scratch.

It sounds so hard.No, it's not too
hard. It's going to be great.

We don't want to overcook these
scallops, OK?I can do that.

Oui, Chef.

Bearing in mind, these are dishes
the chefs have perfected over years.

That's beautiful.

God, I hope no-one
orders venison today.

They have to learn to cook them...

It's got to be right because if I do
an extra minute, at any stage,

it's snookered.

..and get them out
to paying customers,

all in the space of just
one morning.

Running in an Olympic Games is far
easier than this

because I have four years' worth
of preparation, not four hours!

Before lunch service can start...

Still boning, still boning, boning,
boning, boning, boning, boning.

There's a mountain of morning prep
they have to tackle.

I've done this kind of thing before
but not en masse.

This is serious. I feel as if I've
been peeling potatoes for hours.

I've got to get through 80
in an hour.

You know, that's over
one a minute, isn't it?

Often, they're faced
with unfamiliar ingredients.

Oh, my God, trotters?Yeah.

Never worked with a piece of meat
this size in my life,

I've never worked with venison
before.

It's all a new process.

Oh, it nearly went swimming!

Fish just repulses me.

Seriously, it's grim.

It's a scallop. I've never one
done one of these before.

Oh! You've completely broken the
scallop. It's been snapped in half.

While some celebrities are
intimidated by new ingredients,

Essex diva Gemma Collins...
Absolute precision.

..took prepping fish for the
first time in her stride.

Do you love me?
Is it not perfect?

I do, the fish don't! Oh.

Gemma might have been
short on knowledge...

I'm doing four fish at the moment.

Do you want to put that in
the oven for me, hon?

..but definitely not in confidence.

Oh, someone get me fish out.

I feel that I've got this right
under control in the kitchen now.

I think if I worked in a kitchen,

I'd need to be like where this man's
standing, you know?

The fish, the fish!
I need to be the boss.

All our celebs would have eaten
out and in plenty of restaurants,

no doubt about it, but none of them
are prepared for what it's like

inside a professional kitchen
when the orders start flying in.

I need seven chicken salad
on the pass.Yes, Chef.

There isn't a dress rehearsal.
Come on, baby girl. Mama loves you.

They all have to hit
the ground running.

How long till the first one?
I don't know.

It's what happens in service.

You're lucky if your first order
is for one or two plates.

Two scallops, one crab.Oh!

But when the next comes through
for three...

Three liver.Three!

..and then another
for four plates...

Starting with four,
that's a good start, isn't it?

..suddenly, you're juggling
three tables' worth of orders,

all going out at different times.
You've got seven on order.

I'm a little overwhelmed right now.

I'll take going out on stage
in front of thousands of people

over this any day.

I think I'm going under,
I think I'm going under.

Whoa! Too ambitious.

You can forgive mistakes,
you can forgive being slow,

especially when you're being
slammed with orders.

But what a chef will not forgive
is forgetting your orders.

Which is what happened to Corrie's
most infamous serial killer,

Brian Capron.

I've got... I've got...
Have I got...?

I've got eight now, haven't I?

No, no, no. You got four on now.

Just four? Four lots, you mean?
This is the way a proper chef works.

You get one table,
you get halfway through it

and start the next table.

Halfway through that one,
you start the next table,

That's how you work.

Now you want to get a pork belly
on for the next table. Two.

Get the two on now. Right.
Can you do that?

If it's going to confuse you,
which it obviously is...

I've got those on, four.

Now you start the next two.
Two, OK.

Brian, are you listening?
Three more, yeah?

So four, two, two, three. Yeah?

This is a nightmare!

Two langoustines, two halibut,
one, two, three, four, five, six,

seven, eight, nine, ten,

11, 12, 13.

You've got 15 portions on order. 15!

Oh, God Almighty!

In a pro kitchen,
that's what some people call

getting in the weeds,
where you get so many orders,

you can't remember anything.

Chef, how many cods was it
straight away?

Not only is it tough
to keep up in service,

you have to synchronise your orders
with the others in the brigade.

But a platinum selling album
and a Golden Globe between them

didn't help singer Mica Paris...

You're doing like four or five
things at the same time,

plus you're trying to look
glamorous as well.

Very hard.

..and actor Amanda Donohoe
with their coordination.

Right, one lamb, one John Dory,
guys,

three minutes from now, please.

Oh, three and a half.
Three and a half.

Three and a half, Amanda, yeah?
Two minutes.

We can't be two minutes if she said
three and a half, yeah?

You're happy with that fish?

It looks cooked from here. Yeah,
it's cooked.

He's very patient.

I know if I was him, I would have
killed me already,

you know what I mean?

Just pop it under the grill for one
second, otherwise you're going to

make the food cold, yeah?

Mica, we need the garnish, please,
coming down to the pass, yeah?

Yes.Or we're going to have lamb
and no fish. Yes, I'm coming.

Woo!Just give it a second because
we want to serve this pink, yeah?

Shall I leave it under?No, pop it
on there cos it needs to be...

Oh, dear.
What are we going to do about that?

I don't know, what happens now?

We'll use one of these lambs

but don't forget you need
another lamb on. OK.

Very quickly, yeah? Yes, Chef.

That's what happens in a pro kitchen
when you get into a panic.

Get on, guys, this is the bit
where we turn it up a little.

Oh, no! But reality star
Amy Childs...

This is for the owners
of the restaurant

so I'm a little bit
like, "Oh, my God!"

..and Breakfast TV's Louise Minchin
proved it is possible

for some celebrities to work
perfectly in sync.

Amy, I'm going to try
and hold mine back a bit,

so that we're on time together.

I'm stressing,
I'm not going to lie to you.

Oh, God!Are you OK? Careful.

It's fine. Right, OK, cool.

OK, I'm ready for the pass, Chef.

Let's go, let's go. Ready, Chef.

Well done for getting both plates
up at the same time.

That's perfect. Ready for that
glass of wine next. Or not.
Let's go, check on.

Four cappelletti, small, followed
four sea bream, one polenta chips...

Four?!..one friggitelli.
It just never stops, does it?

The professional kitchen is
an opportunity for the celebs to

pick up some of the tricks
of the trade,

to help them
develop in the competition.

Good news, Amy. Table eight loved
the cappelletti. Nice work. Woo-hoo!

Hey, top chef today!

And that's why we like to send them
to a wide range of restaurants...

Push it. Keep pushing.

..to experience food from all
different cultures...

I'm a bit nervous about all
the spices and how much to put in.

..and cuisines.

It's food I love. I've never cooked
it. I've got no understanding of it.

I suspect there might be a few
little bumps along the way.

This Wagyu is £200 a kilogram. Oh,
I can't believe it's so expensive!

We really want them
to open their eyes...Mm!

..to the range of possibilities
out there. Oh, mate!

This is just unbelievable!

Someone find me
a Greek chef to marry now.

This is to die for!

Oh, God! So cool! That's amazing!

Adventurer Charley Boorman is known
as a globe-trotter, but in 2014, in

an Asian fusion kitchen in London,
he was tasked with cooking

a complex Indian samosa dish with
seven different elements.

Can we just throw a few more
ingredients in there to make

it a little harder?Yes, there's
coriander in it as well, actually!

He may have crossed
continents on a motorbike...

Can I have one samosa, Charl? Yes,
sir! Ch... Boss.My name is Chef.

Chef. Yes, Chef.

..but crossing a chef during a busy
service... I'm shaking.

..is an altogether different
challenge!

There you go, Chef.

One samosa.That's not coriander,
that's bloody rocket!

Take it back! That's what you gave
me, Chef.I didn't give you this.

Who gave me that?Don't blame me.
I need two more samosa, Charl, ASAP.
ASAP. Yes, Chef.

It is really difficult to keep
on top of the orders,

but it's kind of exciting
in a kind of horrific way.

Why have you burned so many samosas?
Because I'm not very good, Chef.

I just want it to be perfect, Chef.

Two minutes for the next one.

I don't have two minutes!
I've got one! OK. One minute, then.

Come on, samosas! Cook!

I just want to make him happy,
that's all!

And the dish itself isn't the only
challenge the celebs need to

overcome in the kitchen.

One of the reasons
restaurant food tastes

so good is that it's cooked in ways
you just can't achieve at home.

Powerful gas woks,
professional stoves, and huge ovens.

My barbecue's nothing like that!

Are you letting me
loose with a blowtorch in here? Wow!

Tandoori oven, yeah?

Cos there's no knobs, there's no
dials to control the temperature.

It's a question of touch,
feel, experience.

Going to be 350 degrees centigrade.

OK, so I come from a hot country,
originally.

Tottenham(!)

It just bakes your skin
straightaway. OK.

Basically, any hair I've got on my
arms, I can kiss goodbye to that.

Well, it's cheaper than...Well,
it's cheaper... It's cheaper than

going for a wax.Absolutely.
What do you think? A perfect job

every time! Of course, I guarantee
it won't grow back for six months.
Oh, really?Yeah. Oh, super!

You can pay me at the
end of the day.

TOWIE star Joey Essex is known for
his fake tan and pearly white teeth,

but he got a short, sharp

and sometimes painful lesson on the
perils of cooking in a tandoor oven.

That's fine. Oh, no!
Naan bread from tandoor.

They are going to try to
lay on their own hands.

So this is truffle trimming.

Going to be 360 degrees, more than
360 degree heat. Argh!You'll do it.

Don't worry. Put it in. It's so hot!

Go on! Oh!

Ah! Doh!

Doh! Argh! Ah!

If they lose one or two
seconds, the naan will burn,

they need to remake again.

Oh! It's going to fall off!
No, no, no.

It's... Wow! And you made it!
Look at that, mate.

It's amazing. Look at this!

If you know about naans, you know
that's a perfect naan.

It... It could be better.
Could it?Yes!

Wow! That's class, innit?

Happy? Yeah. I'm really happy.
I mean, I dress myself to look cool

and you've just dressed that
plate to look cool.

It's like fashion.That's true.
Respect.

Joey think that looks like fashion.

Well,
it's not unlike the things he wears!

Bosh! No!

Oh... Got it.

How many times?

Five times, but I got it.

Ah, singed all me hairs!

Look how hot it is. Look.

That is a perfect naan bread.
Look at that.Excellent. Wallop.

But Joey's finished dishes weren't
always the fashion statement

he intended.
The naan bread is soaked with oil.

I think you can't serve it.
I can't serve the naan?Yes.

So, can you make another one,
please?

You're joking!

I'm going to get
told off for this one as well.

I'll hold this...
Bosh! Look at that!

It's perfect.

A bit less oil. Like this?
Just sprinkle oil, yeah.

Perfect.

There you go.
One more venison, please.

Bosh!

Oh. Yeah. This time,
you're all right. Excellent.

Living the naan life.

Wallop!

Another contestant who had a really
tough time handling the heat

was reality star Spencer Matthews.

He was using a tandoor to cook
guinea fowl,

but he lost count of the amount
of times he burnt himself.

Can I have guinea fowl,
please?Yes, Chef.

Ah! It's hot!

Hang it over there.

Yes! I need two sea bass and two
guinea fowl.Yes, Chef.

Argh! Are you OK?Yep.
Don't worry about me, Chef.

I have burnt myself
a couple of times, but there's no...

There's no stopping us.
We have a service to complete.

It's so hot!

Argh!

You OK?Yes, Chef.

It is! Honestly! I don't know
why I keep forgetting that

when you put it in that hell hole
it becomes boiling hot.

Yeah, just touch that bit.

Honestly!

It's so hot, the whole way up.

Spencer actually did all
right that day.

A few calloused fingers,
but all jokes aside,

kitchens can be a dangerous place.

And some celebs sustain
injuries that mean

they are pulled from service
altogether.

Ooh!

Yeah, right, take it out.

Argh!

Oh!You all right? Yeah.

You sure? Let me just see.
Let me just see.

Did you burn yourself?
Are you all right? Yeah.Yeah...

Yeah, that hurt.
What happened, Russell?

I put my finger on the big round
oven and then it sizzled.

So you could serve my finger...

I was just going to say, this is
really good to serve, you know?

You OK?

Ai-ai-ai!I've just burnt my hand.

And it's just...
I can feel it start blistering.

OK, put it... Cold water.

Argh!

I've done it!

Accidents happen
and they can happen to anyone.

Take determined, self-made business
Dragon Michelle Mone.

SHE SCREAMS

She had a seriously tough time
getting through service.

Let me see, let me see.

Let me see. Put your... Put
your hand up. Where's...? Come...

Get out of the kitchen.

I don't know how bad her cut was,
I didn't see it,

but I know she's very distressed
and upset.

Um, I just hope it can be patched
up, so she can carry on today,

cos she'll be gutted if she doesn't
get to do her service.

Right, guys, we've got
five minutes for service.

Oh, you're back! Well done. You OK?

I think I almost took
the tip of my finger off.

I'm feeling a nervous wreck.

One prawn, one scallop to follow.
Two ribeye.

GREGG: Credit where it's due,
though.

I mean, Michelle is one tough
cookie. She's straight from the
school of "the show must go on".

A huge big bit of meat just
came flipping off of that,

right into my cheek.

I'm having a bad day!

Come on, Michelle.
Let's go, let's go!

I need a chips.

I need a chips.
Coming, chips. Yes, Chef!

One plate.

Service!

My finger's full of blood
and painful, yeah,

but no blood will go on the food,
it's fine.

A cut finger and a burnt nose!

The brave chefs that
allow our celebs into their kitchens

want them to learn, but their first
priority is always their customers

and making sure the food
that's served is up

to their restaurant's standard.

So if our celebs aren't up
to scratch,

they'll quickly know about it.

I'm a chef. I've never
been easy-going in my life.

If I get easy, things,
they're not going to work.

So I'm going to be tough enough
and a bit of pressure helps.

When Cold Feet star John Thomson
entered the competition,

he just loved cooking.
He was so enthusiastic.

I've absolutely relished
what I've done so far.

The learning curve is so huge.

But he found out how hard it can
be to cook at the highest level,

when you've got a tricky
pasta dish to master.

Pasta's split.

And a perfectionist head
chef like Francesco Mazzei

watching your every move.

I need one tortelli go with
the sea bass, yeah?

Quick, quick, quick, quick,
quick, quick!

How long the tortelli, John?
Er... 30 seconds, Chef.

Wow! Are you sure?Er, no.

OK, good, so, tell me
the right time, then, OK?

One minute, Chef. Good.
Don't waste my time!

It's gone.

What's happened?It's split.

Oh, no.I put three more in.

You sure?Yeah, yeah. Three in.
What we do with this, then?

Disaster here.Yeah.
What shall we do here?

OK. Three more. Come on. Three more.
There's three in, Chef.

Leave it, leave it, leave it.
I'm not giving that. Come on.

Let's do it again. You're burning
your butter there now?

Nothing can prepare
you for this maelstrom...

..of craziness, really.

Look, this one is boiling,
this one is not boiling.OK.

Why did you put it there?
OK?OK, Chef.

Three, four, five, six,
that's it. OK.

Don't touch it now, OK?

To be fair to the chefs,

it's not easy having
a brigade of rank amateurs take

over your lunch service.

But being famous counts
for nothing in this challenge.

Cooking in a pro kitchen is
nothing like cooking at home...

What do I do now?!

..where nobody cares if the plates
aren't warm...It's cold.

Heat it up.
Yes, Chef.It's too cold.

Re-plating it!
..and the food looks a bit scruffy.

That's too much sauce.
We have to re-plate.

And often, the hardest lesson our
celebrities, like Sugababe

Amelle Berrabah had to learn, is how
to make their plates look good.

Move the knife,
don't smash the tuna.I'm so sorry!

Being sorry is not going to fix it.
Just take your time and do it right.

OK?OK, Chef.
I'm not happy at all, to be honest.

I don't think he's even going
to want to serve this.

Oh, no!

OK, Amelle, come over here. Stop,
stop, stop! It's not even centre.

The tuna is all smashed up.
This is not what I showed you, OK?

Yeah, I understand. Let's do it
again.Do it again. This cannot go
out like that, OK?Yes, Chef.

Corrie's Brian Bovell's quenelles
also didn't pass muster.

I'm not happy with the quenelle.
You know?All right.

That needs to be as professional.

Can you make it again for me,
please?OK, the quenelle. Do it!

Quick!Absolutely!
Yes, sir! Yes, sir!

He made it look so easy,
man, before.

It's those little details, man.

Those chefs sure earn their money,
especially

when the staff start answering back.

Oh, yes! I think
I know who you're talking about,

our friend, writer and broadcaster,
Janet Street-Porter.

So, Janet, two cod.

Janet, where are you?I'm doing it!
We've got two cod on order.
You need to communicate with us

to make sure we all know
what's going on?

I'm doing it! All right.
OK, so you've got four away as well.

We need another two cod just
after the other docket, OK?

It was always going to be
interesting to see how Janet

took to being bossed around.
Yes, Chef! I'm seasoning them!

We don't know if you're doing it
if you don't answer, OK?

All right, OK, right.
Do I do this in, yeah?

So we're going to need that dish
up in eight minutes, Janet, OK?

Yeah, yeah, yeah!

Having a timer would be a plus,
wouldn't it?

So make sure your garnish
is seasoned.

What if I don't like it
as salty as you do?

It's my restaurant, so I'll tell
you whether it needs more salt.

Yeah, over to these plates.

Quick as you can. We want a nice,
clean presentation.

Ah...Oh, don't! Don't, don't!
I'll pick it off the plate!

We need to hurry up. Mess all over
the plate is going to slow you down.

It needs to be a nice circle, yeah?

We need more sauce.
That's not enough.

Yes, but I'm left-handed
and the thing's right-handed.

Doesn't matter. Left or right, the
amount of sauce is always the same.

Right, service.

OK, a little bit messy,
little bit slow. Let's speed it up.

It's hard because of the
heat and also him

shouting at you puts you off.

I know he's trying to be helpful,
but it's doing my head in.

All things considered, I think
the chef stayed pretty calm.

But sometimes, our celebs...
All right, guys.

Let's speed up a little bit more
because you are behind.

..push them to breaking point.
Hey! Everyone! Hello!

Oi!

When I talk, I want to hear people
answering me, yeah?

If I say something, I want to hear
yes, no, maybe...Yes, Chef.

In 2009, Emmerdale actor
Deena Payne, sprinter Iwan Thomas

and Crimewatch's Rav Wilding
couldn't seem to do anything right.

Do you know how long for that
beef salad, please?

Two minutes, Chef.
I'll get my stopwatch out, shall I?

What's wrong with that?
Plate's not hot.

It's freezing! By the time it
gets to the customer, it'll be cold!
Yes, Chef.

Really nice, really nice...Yes...
But a thumbprint.

Got a what? Thumbprint!

It's the first dish. Look at it!

Lobster lotus chip.
Lobster...lotus chip.Yes, Chef.

Nor could tough man boxer Joe
Calzaghe. Right, Joe, what are you
giving me next?

I'm not trying to be arrogant,
but if you don't answer me

then I don't know that you've heard
me.Yeah. And then you're not doing
what I want you to do, OK?

Yeah, sorry, Chef. Two minutes,
Chef. Every time I ask you for
a time, Joe, you say two minutes.

I need the truth.OK. Maybe four?

And reality star
Gemma Collins was more

interested in chatting to the guests
than she was cooking lunch.

Gemma! Come back to the kitchen!

But with the best will in the world,
in professional kitchens,

there are some situations
out of everyone's control,

as actors Christopher Biggins
and Tina Hobley discovered.

One halibut, one ravioli.
BOTH:Yes, Chef! Thank you.

Guys, the gas has gone out.

No gas. Can we get
maintenance in the kitchen, please?

Thank you.
Well, let's call it a day!

Basically, we're in a hotel
and everything's highly...

It's a highly sophisticated system,
so someone in the hotel has

pressed a button which
means my gas has gone off.

Things that should be
boiling aren't boiling.

And I need to put my ravioli
into boiling water,

so, you know,
it's a little stressful.

But the show has to go on!
Biggins! Move yourself!

This flat top works regardless,

so you're going to have to share
that hot top together, guys.OK.

You've got to have a lot of love
for each other today.Yes!
We've got the love.

Don't know if you've got the finite
touch just yet, Biggins!All right.

We'll get there.

Guys, what's happening with this
gas? Anyone know?It's still off.

I'm going to have a hot restaurant
full of people...I know!

..who can't eat any food in a
minute.Shall I go and sing to them?

These lunchtime
services are always for real paying
members of the public,

who need to remain oblivious to the
drama that goes on in the kitchen.

And just
when all seemed to be lost...

Chef, fantastic news,
the gas is back.

Yay! Gas is back on, everybody!
So, no excuse for any dodgy cooking.

Ha-ha!

Right, mains away, table 22.

Halibut and ravioli.

I want them
both on the pass at the same time.

You're only as good as your last
meal, guys.The last supper!

Am I dripping? A little bit.

Lovely halibut.
Really beautiful halibut.

What's the matter with the ravioli,
then, Chef? Nothing.

Well, you can sink or you can swim
and over the years,

there have been a few celebs that
have thrived off the experience.

How do you think I've done?Really
well. I'm not going to deny it.

Really, really well.
I have potential?

That's my best batch.
I'm proud of that.

I was in control of that
whole situation.

I feel like I'm in a rhythm now
and I can flow. It's good.

I think once I stop,
my head will probably explode,

but at the minute, I feel good.

Yes!

Absolutely perfect!

Good job.Thank you so much!
Well done!

You did really, really well.Thank
you. You did really, really well.
Loved it.

Oh, my goodness! Did you enjoy that?
I loved it. Yeah, we did.

It's why we do this challenge

because it has the ability to really
ignite passion in people.

Thank you so much.

I get a sweaty kiss!
Honestly, it was brilliant!

It's the adrenaline rush, John,

the buzz of being
part of a well-run kitchen.

It's one of the greatest
highs you can get.

We saw a perfect
example of that in 2019.

Reality star Vicky Pattison
came to us...Oh!

..and in her first test,
she was clueless!

I'm 31 now and I went to uni
when I was 18.

I sort of did
a bit of cooking there.

Fajitas for the lasses,
or, like, a shepherd's pie. Maybes
a chilli. I do a canny chilli.

Vicky, you OK?No.
What's the matter?

I'm really hot and I'm really
stressed out. I've got the chicken
and the onions in.

I don't know how to make like the
body of the curry, like, the sauce.

Do you cook, Vicky?

No. I'm hoping, learn some skills
here, find a fella, kids...

Hello, Delia.

The next day, we sent her off to the
restaurant kitchen and I don't

mind admitting, John, I would have
bet it was going to be a disaster.

Three salmon, Vicky. You are going
to get it.What the hell?!

That's six salmon!

What the fish-loving hell?!

Straight out the gate...
Vicky, how are you doing?

I'm a bit overwhelmed with the six
salmon straightaway, like.
That's OK, no problem.

Obviously... I might get me
potatoes on, what do you reckon?
Get your potatoes on, that's right.

Potatoes in, all of them, in they
go. Try not to throw them into the
emulsion. Place them nicely.

She had a hectic start,

but surprised us all
and really started to flourish.

Never ever done this before.
Like, can't even make a fry-up

and make sure me beans are hot
at the same time as me bacon.

Looks good, buddy.Thank you, babe.
Well done.

Come on, Vicky. Bring it up, bring
it up.Pair of salmon.

Looks good.Thank you very much,
Chef. Looks good, Vic, well done.
Thank you.

And even as the orders mounted up,
she didn't lose her focus.

There you go, babe.

Nice job, Vicky. Nice job.
Thanks, babe!

I need those three salmon up now,
please.No problem, Chef.

Definitely not easy,
by any stretch of the imagination,

but I feel like I'm sort of getting
a bit of a flow going.

How long on that salmon, Vicks?
About two... Less than two minutes.

Vicky, you've nailed it.
I tell you what, sack the day job.

I'll give you a job.
I've enjoyed it!

OK, Vicks, your last one.
Let's make it good.

Salmon there, Chef. All right, good
girl. Well done!Thank you.

Service, please!

You know that saying,
if you can't handle the heat?

Never really applied to me before.

That passion that was
ignited in Vicky got her all

the way to the final.

I love it when the celebs come
back really inspired

and they need that inspiration

because by the time
they get to the semifinals,

the professional challenges
just get tougher and bigger.

One of the most extraordinary
nights I can ever remember was

the semifinal of 2013,

where our celebs had to cook a
three course dinner for 150 people

at Cambridge University.

As well as providing a great cooking
challenge for the celebs,

taking them outside the MasterChef
kitchen also offers viewers

a sneak peek behind the closed
doors of some of the country's most
iconic institutions.

Welcome to the beautiful

and historic Gonville & Caius
College, here in Cambridge.

There were some big personalities
in the kitchen that year.

Actors Ade Edmondson and
Brian Capron, comedian Les Dennis,

rapper Speech Debelle, singer Shane
Lynch from Boyzone, and of course,

the biggest personality of them all,
broadcaster Janet Street-Porter.

The stunning location spoke volumes
about quality of the food expected.

And a high-end dinner for 150
was one of the most ambitious

semifinal challenges we've ever
set the celebrities.

We are fortunate in
Gonville & Caius.

We're used to quite a high
standard of cooking.

Our fellows and our guests this
evening will be expecting

a fine dining experience.

Welcome, everybody, to Caius
Kitchen. We're very, very busy.

We've got four hours to get it
ready, so let's go.

Boyband singer Shane and comedian
Les were the unlikely double act

responsible for
a wood-pigeon starter.

You've got to be very careful.

There's a lot of very tiny bones
here. They're very, very sharp.

Put your thumb through it and the
wishbone will come clean out.

OK.I would say to both of you,
initially, get these going. Yeah.

So this is out of the way and then
we can concentrate on the salad.

Right, Chef. OK. Thank you, Chef.
Right, Les, let's crack on.

You should aim to be about one
a minute. OK.I know it seems fast,
get it all out.

OK. I grew up doing a bit of hunting
with my father.

I've gutted an animal or two.

I've done a fair few pheasant
and rabbit in my day.

Never went hunting,
not in working-class Liverpool.

There was nowhere to go hunting.

As long as every piece of that
wishbone is out,

we don't want any customers to get
a sharp piece in the mouth.

First course at 7.15. I'd
start panicking now if I was them!

Speech and Ade had a complex main,
centred around lamb rumps...

All that?!

..which all need to be
individually butchered,

removing the fat membrane.

I think this is going to annoy
the life out of me!

It's absolutely excruciatingly dull.
Come on!

I bet it's hit home now,

now they've seen the amount of food
they've got to prepare.

150 lamb rumps - that's tough.

Oh, look at that one!

In one piece! One piece!

I've got to prep the vegetables
for the dish.

Right now, doing the aubergine.

Then I've got to do courgettes,
tomatoes, sweet peppers as well.

I find chopping vegetables
quite therapeutic, so...

..it's all right. I've usually got
a bit of music playing, but, hey...

Once it's char-grilled,
it's going to sit in that ring.

These are way too big.OK.

Getting through all the prep for 150
portions is a tall order,

and the team who were thrown most by
their course were Janet and Brian,

who had to make a tuile basket,
filled with a passion fruit mousse,

topped with a sugar cage.

Does this mean anything?
Doesn't mean anything.

I thought it was a secret symbol or
something.No, no secret symbol.

Like the symbol of the college.
No, no.

We're going to start with the paste
for the tuile biscuit.

We've definitely been given
the hardest course.

We have, by miles!

The dessert is complicated,
it's complex, it's fussy.

I've never, ever cooked anything
even approximating that,

because that represents
everything I hate in culinary terms.

How are you feeling, Brian?
I'm hopeless at desserts,

I really don't do desserts at all,

so I've never done a...tuile?
Tuile.A tuile.

I've never done one of those.
I've eaten one,

but I've never cooked one.Yes.

Now, we don't make it easy
for our celebs.

And Janet and Brian had to make 150
perfect tuile baskets from scratch.

There's the paste.
So, that's what you need to do.

That's what we're trying to achieve.
OK? Do you want to come and try?

All right, I'll have a go.
Here's some more.

So, I've put it on the top...
Put it on the top,

put a dob and then turn
the palette over.

Take it over to the oven.
They will go very quickly.

You won't believe how fast
it'll go.

And you have to work really, really
quickly. This is the hardest part.

The biscuits.God, you're getting
me anxious!

All right, all right.

NERVOUS LAUGHTER

OK, bring it over.

Hands around it, on the side.
But it's hot!

That's all right. Go! Clasp it!

Clasp it?! It's boiling!

OK, it just sticks in the mould.
Just put your hand in the mould.

Pop it out.Well... OK, four.

We're under way.Four.

That's only 146 to go.

I think we've been punished
by being put in there.

Yeah. We could be here
for some time.

I've zoned out. I'm in tuile world.

Yes, we're in tuile world.

We're not doing badly, it'll
probably get a little bit stressed

as time goes on.There's no point
getting stressed. No.

It's not a United Nations
peace negotiation, is it?

Exactly. It's just food...
Just making a dessert.

..and we'll remain calm
and focused.

The only thing you've done
is the tuiles.

What do you mean, "the only"? Don't
belittle what I've done so far!

I'm not belittling it,
I'm just stating a fact.

You couldn't do this any quicker!

We've got cages to make,
we've got mousse to make,

pick off the mint...Good luck.

I've got another one with a hole
in it, Brian.

Sounds like Janet's having
a nice time!

SHE YELLS

With the wheels beginning
to fall off in the pastry kitchen,

the other teams were also buckling
under the sheer volume of prep

required to cater
for such a big dinner.

We now just have to get
on with the salad.

A lot of chopping to do.

Once you see this amount
of butternut squash,

are you suddenly realising
the scale?

The scale, and I think this
is probably,

the toughest vegetable
to prepare.

It's a kind of kick to think
that you might be feeding somebody,

who goes on to win the Nobel Prize
for Literature,

and that one day they might come up
to you and say,

"I tasted your wood pigeon salad
and went on

"to be the greatest novelist
in the world."

If me and Les are late,
then the whole dinner's late

and we really don't want that
to happen.

So, time to crack on.
I think we're doing OK.

Nobody's come up and screamed at us
to say we should be further on.

How much more do you have to do?
Erm... All of those.

Yeah.Have you started
the beetroot yet?

No.No.What?

You haven't started the beetroot
yet? No.

Do we need to think...
one of us think about beetroot,

or should we just both carry on
with this?

I would think just move
your tushy-tush. OK.

Getting your head around the sheer
scale of cooking for 150

would be a tall order
for most of us,

and, while the head chef was there
to oversee our celebs...

It's just taking a long time.
It's going to be hot for me.

..they really were left to do
all the hard graft themselves.

It's just really hot.

It's just all of this area,
all round here,

is just...even when you get
your hand near it, it's hot.

Are you still lambing?
I still am, yes.

Have you stopped at all or have
you done something else?

No, I haven't done anything else.
So, how many of you got? How many
have you done, do you think?

I think I've done 90...something.

I'm nearly up to 100.

So, you've been doing
that for about two hours?

Might be on the rare side.
And how's Speech getting on?

I've no idea.No idea?

I haven't lifted my head.

This is the Ade and Speech
method of working, is it? Speech?

You cooking everything else?
I don't think so,

I'm just doing the aubergine.

Are you still cooking the aubergines
you cut up ages ago?Yes,

but I also cut up courgettes
and red peppers...

Oh, OK...and started the sauce.
OK.

So, we're doing all right?
Are we?

Well, you are, except there's
still potatoes to be done.

Oh, yeah. I think it was
that exact moment

that the chef realised he had six
celebs responsible for the dinner,

and he really started to worry
about the food being ready.

I'm going to have to move you on
to get the potatoes done.

If not, we're going to be really
well behind. Right, OK.OK?

One of my lads will have
to just take over on this.

150 potatoes.

You've come off the lamb?

I have, I'm a bit annoyed
to have come off the lamb.

I wanted to finish the task,
you know?

I felt like I'd let my lamb down.

Are you going to get this out
on time?

I literally have no idea.

Speech and Ade aren't the best team.

The left hand doesn't really know
what the right hand's doing.

We've just got to hope it comes
together and I mean, hope.

Now, I can vividly remember
thinking, at this stage,

there was not a hope in hell of them
serving this meal on time,

which, amazingly, hardly
ever happens.

How many have you got left to go?
I don't know. I've lost the plot.

We've still got sugar cages to make,
still got the mousse to make.

A lot of work to do, still.

We have an hour
and five minutes to service.

OK, any second, I'm going to
have to take one of you off
these tuiles and start on the mousse

because we really do need to get
this mousse under way.

I'll start you on the mousse, Brian.
Yeah.Oh, no! I like doing mousse!

And I'll leave Janet on the tuiles.
Oh, no!

What have I done to upset you, Tone?

You've not done anything
to upset me.
We're just not working fast enough.

Now, fold that in carefully.

I am worried
because time is ticking away.

Into the fridge now.

You've got 15 to go.

15?

How many more do I need to do?
Do three more trays to make sure.

That's it, that's the last one.

I feel like I'm in an operating
theatre.

By this point, even though
she'd finished the tuiles,

Janet had all
but given up on the desserts.

And outside,

the guests were starting to arrive
for the end of term formal dinner.

Tonight's quite a special occasion.

Our students have
brought their parents with them.

It would be great if it could be
a special, exciting meal,

something people will be talking
about in weeks and months to come.

I have got high expectations of what
the food's going to be like, yes.

Normally, on formal occasions,

the food is of a really high
standard, so we'll see tonight.

I can never remember in this college
that dinner was served late

and I certainly hope it
won't happen tonight.

We're 50 minutes away from service.
We're confident we're

going as fast as we can,
without a shadow of a doubt.

Shane and Les had their heads
down all night, but time was

against them and they still hadn't
cooked their main ingredients.

HE COUNTS

Got a lot to do still. We might
not... We're trying not to panic.

Last bit.
We're going to get the pigeon in.

They're going to put the lettuce
and the beetroot

and the pumpkin on the plates,
that can go upstairs.

And then, when it's done, the roast
pigeon will go upstairs as well

and the whole thing will be
finished up top. So that's 33.

You've got to do that five times.
Right.

When you're cooking for 150...

OK, Shane, we need to start doing
the pigeon. Leave Les on the salad.

..organisation
and timing is absolutely key.

We need to seal it off,
six minutes in the oven.

We really need to move now,
so we're running them.

Ah, there's a few birds in here.

I'm used to a few birds,
you know what I mean?

I think this is 35 here. So, er...

It's not even
a third of the way through.

We're up against it.

Right to the bottom. Right to
the bottom. No, no, no.

On the things. Yeah, go on.
On the things, they sit.

One. Only 149 to go!

Two. 148.

Three. 147.

They just couldn't work fast
enough and at this point,

we were really worried the food
was going to be very late.

I've got to pour it.

But if we were
concerned about the starters,

the desserts were in chaos!

And Janet and Brian didn't quite
get the sense of urgency.

Argh! Don't worry. Don't worry.
That's all right, Tone.

That could be all right. No,
it's no good.Why? Don't break it.

No good.What...?! No good.

Try again.

Tone?

How do you get it off?
How did you do it?

I can't do this!

It's too impossible. Can I swap?
I'd better carry on with this.

It's taking me a bit of time to get
the hang of this.Brian won't swap.

I've been to art school.
I've studied architecture.

This is what I do.

I don't want to do the sugar.
I've got no sugar aptitude.

I'm so wanting to take over, but
I've decided to be his handmaiden.

BRIAN LAUGHS

Because anything rather
than do the sugar!

It's not an option.
We have to have sugar baskets.

It's on the menu and we promised
them, so it has to be ready.

BANGS GONG

The chefs that allow us

into their kitchens often have
to contend with strong

personalities from our celebrities,
who come from very different worlds.

But they have to stay firm,
as they have their own standards

and reputations to preserve.

Is that the last pigeon?Yes, sir.
Last pigeon, Chef.

These have got to go in.
Top oven? Top one.

OK.Right, there we go. Right,
let's go. Keep on going.

They're behind, but they're not that
far behind. Ten minutes.

Bring them in
in ten minutes and we're ready.

We're just carving the pigeon.

Shane, how long? They're a little
bit under.A little bit under?

Little bit under.

Right, put them in this oven.
What's happened?

Pigeon are still a bit under.

The what?The pigeon's still
a bit under.How much longer?
Five minutes.

We're over 100 now.
100 plates surveyed.

With the guests seated,
we all had to help out.

At this point, the starters
were due in the Great Hall,

but the salads weren't plated,
the pigeons weren't carved,

so the chef had no choice
but to delay service.

Ready? No, no. Ten minutes.
Ten minutes?

For the...? Just give them ten
minutes.Ten minutes.

I've delayed the dinner
for ten minutes.

The first time we've been late.

Under pressure now.

Les, as soon as these are done...
Yeah.

..upstairs, you need to get them
into the lift.

Close the door.

Hey, guys,
we're going to have to delay

the dinner for 15 minutes
cos you're way behind.

Come on, mate! Let's go!
Five minutes.Five minutes.

OK, so five minutes from now, yeah?

Go up and start serving.Go, Shane.

Up this way, let's go.
So we can start to serve the wine?
Give wine.OK.

Give extra wine, if you have to.
Finally, 20 minutes late,

Shane and Les had all
the elements in the service area.

All they had to do now was perfectly
present all 150 plates.

One of you will put the pigeon on
and one will dress the salad, yeah?
OK.

OK, let's go.

Over the top, the...

We're moving!

Delicious!

Beautifully served.

Wood pigeon was very tender.
A little bit pink for me.

The wood pigeon was lovely.

The meat was very tender, very soft,
generally very tasty, very good job.

Can you do one right-handed,
one left-handed, Les?

Er... Can you do one in each hand,
like a gunslinger?

Go, Les! Go on, son! Go on!

I enjoyed my pigeon, so much that
I actually stole the remaining

pigeon from my neighbour's plate.
It was absolutely delicious.

Hey, mate. Give us a hug!

Well done, mate.
And you.Good job, mate. Good job.

Plating 150 starters was tough,

but plating all the mains
was incredibly demanding.

Speech will be here...Yeah.
..and you will be here.Oh, I see.

Ade and Speech had five different
elements. Are you ready to go?

Roast rump of lamb, a chargrilled
vegetable stack with spinach,

roast potatoes and red wine sauce.
That's a lot!

Looking really good! All that hard
work! Great food! Great food!

I'd be happy if I was out there.

I thought the lamb was delicious.
I really enjoyed it.

Flavour combination worked well.
Very enjoyable.

Those plates are hot, aren't they?
Ow! Ow!

Almost there. Almost there.
Well done!

What happened then? Mm?What
happened then? I don't know.

I don't know, it's just mad. I kind
of blacked out, it just happened.

Janet, Brian, the mains have gone.

Right.
So, we're looking at 20 minutes now.

Despite all her moaning, when it
came to plating, Janet got stuck in.

Start on the coulis now. Yeah.
Take one off, finish it, back on.

10, 12, 14, 16, 18...
Guys, you're doing really well.

That's looking really nice.

34, 35, 36...

150 tuile baskets,
150 sugar baskets, a mousse,

all the words that Janet would never
normally use in her vocabulary,

unless there was swearing at me!

And very unlikely to
reappear in my vocabulary again.

82, 84, 86, 88...

I'm struggling to retain my sanity.

OK, come on,
we're on the home run now. 50, 150.

That's the last lot.

We can start to clear, yeah?
Yes, please.

OK, thank you. Janet, Brian,
go upstairs, start serving.

And you've got all
the baskets to go up.

And you've got all
the mint to go up.

I must have walked 500 miles today.
Right, here we go.

We're waiting for the mint.
We can't start without the mint.

Is it on there? Where's the mint?

Run it up the stairs, if necessary,
just the mint, bring it up.

Why can't we just start
without the mint?

So a few people don't have mint...
No, no. No way.

We don't even know what... We've got
80-odd of these down there.

Just shut up.

Here we go. We're going.

One does the cage,
one does the mint.

Come on, we've got to go,
we've got to go quicker.
Let's get them out.

This is fancy
and I came to Cambridge to be fancy!

Wow!

I thought the dessert was awesome.
It was absolutely delicious.

It was a crime to eat this, it's
so pretty, but I can't stop myself.

The pudding was really good.

I especially liked
the sugar on the top.

I'd love to know how
the chefs did it.

Let's go.

The pudding was particularly
delicious.

I liked the spun sugar on the top,
the tuile basket, that was lovely.

Next one.

We're very close now.

Excellent, Brian.
Thank you very much. Thank you very
much. Thank you, Janet.Thank you.

Excellent.The final course was
a splendid end to the meal.

I am very impressed with what the
chefs have achieved tonight.

I think this has been a great end to
the evening. It really impressed me.

It looked fantastic. Really good.
What did they say?

Well, they said it's the best
part of the evening, the best meal.

The best bit of the meal? Yeah.
Really? Yeah.

It was the best one, I think.
So, it was best...Part of the meal?
It was the best part of the meal?

Thank you very much.
Thank you very much. Thank you.

Well, there you have it, John.
The good, the bad... Oh! Oh!

..and the downright thrilling
escapades of our celebrities

in the world of the professional
kitchen.

All in the name of inspiring them
on their journey...

..to cookery excellence.

Next time... Oh, my God! I'm
falafeling! ..there's no I in team.

Just do as you're told.
Or is there?

This isn't normal!

We take a look at 15 years
of unlikely pairings...

It's a Pussycat Doll
and an X Factor reject, hello!

..squabbling couples... I'm bowing
to her superior knowledge.

Just cos I've been cooking
curries all my life
doesn't make me an expert.

..and complete breakdowns.
It's just a bowl of slush!

And we go back in time,
quite literally...

Ladies and gentlemen,
lunch is at one.

..to one of the most entertaining
team challenges

from the last 15 years.
Let's do this, chaps!

Oh, my God! My custard!
Could start crying!

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