Original subtitles

[CACKLING]

[YELPS]

-Yeah! -[BOTH LAUGHING]

This is great.

The Salem Historical Reputation Rehabilitation Celebration.

Mayor Stoughton is finally bringing pride back to Salem.

Yeah, they say the Salem witch trials were mass hysteria

that unjustly brutalized the innocent.

But, hey, they thought there were witches running around.

What are you gonna do? Who likes witches?

-Not me! -[DOLL SQUEAKS]

That's my boy.

We have to stop living in shame

about our history and own it!

But what about all the innocent women

who were convicted of being witches?

[ALL GASPING]

[ALL MURMURING]

Ooh, you're taking their side?

A witch! I got a witch here!

Stop that, I'm not a witch!

That's what all witches say.

[GRUNTS] Hey, come back here, you witch!

You better not come any closer.

If I'm a witch, like you say I am,

I can summon the Demon of Salem on you.

Do your worst.

Okay, you asked for it.

[HUMMING]

Uh...

Gee, that... That's a pretty good trick there, sis.

-How'd you do that? -Do what?

-[ROARS] -[SCREAMS]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

SCOOBY-DOO: Scooby-Dooby-Doo!

Wow, Salem, Massachusetts.

This place is one of the original havens of mystery.

Huh, the mystery now is why the streets are deserted

during a historical festival.

Whoa, Thunder.

Okay, folks, end of the line. That'll be 10 bucks.

Are you sure we're in the right place?

Where is everyone?

I said that'll be $10.

[BLEATS]

[BLEATS]

[BLEATS]

Uh, keep the change.

Enjoy the festival!

Onward, Thunder.

[BLEATING]

I don't think goats like me.

DAPHNE: Hey, guys, look at this.

Who's that?

It says her name was Abatha Bishop.

Apparently, she was one of Salem's most notorious witches.

BOTH: Witches?

Relax, witches aren't real.

Unfortunately, in the past, people didn't know that,

and innocent women were accused of witchcraft

because they didn't conform to society's norms.

That's terrible.

I mean, she looks just like me.

STOUGHTON: Do you also practice witchcraft?

Welcome to the Salem Historical Reputation Rehabilitation Celebration.

I'm Mayor Stoughton.

And this is my assistant, Northrup.

Hey, hi, there. I'm Northrup.

Here's some brochures on why our reputation is wicked undeserved.

I'm not sure this is factually accurate.

Between 1692 and 1693 alone,

Salem accused over 50 women of being witches.

Fifty?

So, the whole town just suddenly went witch-crazy?

Witch-crazy?

I am a descendant of Lieutenant Governor William Stoughton,

who oversaw those witch trials.

I will not have his good name smeared.

You see, they've got the same names,

so, by extension, you're smearing the mayor's name as well.

Yes, we get the connection. Thank you.

Oh, gosh, I apologize.

I shouldn't have used the phrase "witch-crazy" to describe your ancestors.

Intolerant wackos is more like it!

[CHUCKLES] Oh, Daphne.

Uh, she didn't mean it, Mr. Mayor.

I mean, nowadays, we all know

there's no such thing as witches.

That's where you're wrong.

Witches are very real.

In fact, someone is using witchcraft

to destroy this festival,

by conjuring the infamous Demon of Salem.

BOTH: Demon of Salem?

Wicked scary, right?

Like Abatha Bishop did, 300 years ago.

I've heard the story.

Abatha Bishop was accused of practicing witchcraft.

During her trial, she appeared to conjure a demon.

[ROARING]

[SNARLING]

-[ROARS] -[WHIMPERS]

VELMA: In the confusion and panic,

she disappeared without a trace,

and the demon was never seen again.

Until now.

Like, witches and demons?

Okay, got it.

You know, there's lots of coastal cities

that have great seafood.

I say we throw a dart at a map and go there.

Dart, check. Map, check.

Sure, run away like everybody else.

I'm gonna find that witch and bring her to justice.

This is Salem. We don't like witches.

They're wicked, wicked.

Northrup, mind your Rs.

"Find that witch and bring her to justice?"

He's literally talking about a witch hunt

in the 21st century.

Well, gang, we definitely have a mystery on our hands.

And we need to solve it fast,

before Salem's history repeats itself.

Agreed. Come on.

[GROWLING]

So, like, Salem has been witch-free for 400 years,

until the day we show up?

Typical.

-[BOTH SNIFF] -BOTH: Mmm?

MRS. BAKER: Carl, hurry up. Deliver those pies.

Coming, Ma.

Hmm?

[BOTH SNIFFING]

-[BOTH GASP] -Hello, young 'uns.

Best pie in the east.

Care for a sample?

-Samples? -Like, we don't do samples.

Samples are for tourists, ma'am.

-Ah, professionals, eh? -You got that right.

Yes, and we'd like to investigate your claim

of best pie in the east,

-Mrs... -Baker.

By name, and by trade.

-Well, Mrs. Baker... -You know the law.

Are you challenging me?

I helped write the Pie Laws of 1983.

I say it's the best, it had better be!

Because if it's not, I give it to you for free!

I hope you bake as well as you rhyme.

What's your poison?

BOTH: Blueberry, ma'am.

Go ahead.

BOTH: [MUNCHING] Mmm!

Mmm-hmm.

[BOTH SPITTING]

[BOTH SCREAMING]

Was that a good spitting-out?

BOTH: [STAMMERING] De... De...

Delicious?

BOTH: Demon!

Ah.

-[ROARS] -Ahhh!

[BOTH WHIMPERING]

[SNARLS]

[BOTH WHIMPERING]

[SNARLING]

But, Daphne, in the old days,

it was simply due to a lack of knowledge,

that people blamed their unexplained misfortunes on witchcraft.

That's no excuse.

Well, it is an excuse,

technically, but it's not an excuse-excuse.

-[GASPS] -What is it, Fred?

Goat.

I don't see any goats.

He was just there, staring.

Right. Maybe we should focus on the mystery at hand,

and worry about goat-staring afterwards.

[BOTH PANTING]

What's going on? Did you see the goat?

The Demon of Salem attacked us!

And I didn't see any goats. Scoob?

Demon, check! Goat, uncheck.

Where's the demon now?

Like, it was just here.

Yeah, sounds like a goat I know.

So, was it the best blueberry pie in the east?

Actually, yes. [CHUCKLES]

The crust was flaky,

but, like, held together nicely,

and created an interesting textural contrast with...

Guys, let's stay with the demon-attacking part.

What happened then?

Uh, the demon attacked?

Yeah, like it's pretty self-explanatory, Fred.

What are these?

They look like metal filings.

Could be a clue.

Uh, guys?

We seem to have an audience.

Wow, friendly town.

The mayor has everyone scared and paranoid.

Scared, check. Paranoid, check.

Yeah, for me, personally,

the compelling argument for fear and paranoia

is literally being attacked by a witch-conjured demon.

Difficult to counterpoint that.

But, if you're looking for a devil's advocate,

there he is!

[SNARLING]

-[ROARS] -[SCREAMING]

Run!

[ROARING]

Please, this time, don't say, "Split up!"

Fine, divide into two groups.

Changing the vocab... Should have seen that coming.

Jerk move, Jones!

[BOTH WHIMPERING]

[WHIMPERING CONTINUES]

[GROWLS]

[IN COCKNEY ACCENT] Welcome to Ye Old Shoppe of Blacksmithery.

-I'm Ye. -[IN COCKNEY ACCENT] And I'm Old.

-And we're blacksmiths. -Yeah, we're blacksmiths.

Hmm?

You have any black that needs smithing...

We're your lads.

Oh, I see you got cloven 'ooves.

-Hooves. -That's what I said, 'ooves.

[GROWLS]

Yeah, tough break, I get it.

You need shoes, we got 'ooves.

-We can help. -[GRUNTS]

Hooves, cloven, size 10.

You're in luck. One pair left.

[GROWLS]

Whoa, there, boy.

There, you're all set.

Now, we just have to hook you up here...

And off you go.

Huh?

[GROWLS]

[ROARS]

[BOTH SCREAMING]

[BOTH WHIMPERING]

Are you guys okay?

Divide into two groups? Really, Fred?

Hey, splitting up is essential when being chased by a monster.

That way, if one group doesn't make it,

the other still has a chance to solve the mystery.

Logical, yet sociopathic.

Hmm, looks like the demon left something behind.

It's covered in some kind of powder.

I don't get it.

Even if the stories of Abatha Bishop are true,

and she conjured up a demon to escape,

at least that motive makes sense.

Why conjure a demon now?

STOUGHTON: Revenge!

The witch obviously wants to scare

everyone who's taking pride in Salem's history.

Obviously.

Oh, obviously.

Does your brain even process the words you say,

or do they somehow beam out directly

from your intolerant, wacko DNA?

Oh, I'm paying very close attention

to what everybody says and does.

For instance, I noticed the demon appeared

when you arrived in Salem,

and that you're the only one "defending witches."

Tell me, young lady.

Do you like witches?

Whoa, whoa, hold on there, Mr. Mayor.

What exactly are you suggesting?

That she likes witches.

Wow. Okay, fine, you got me.

I admit it, I'm a witch.

Total witch, right here.

[ALL GASPING]

[WHISPERING] Are you out of your mind?

Ixnay on the itch-way.

Who cares? It's the 21st century.

What's he gonna do?

Did not see that coming.

We don't like witches.

Witches are bad.

Like, the pitchforks and torches

were kind of a dead giveaway.

Who even owns torches?

We have apprehended the witch responsible

for conjuring the demon.

At long last,

I will not only vindicate my ancestors,

but all the appropriately paranoid people of Salem.

[CROWD CHEERING]

Pies! Get your pies here!

Best in the east.

Eat 'em or throw 'em at witches!

They are deliciously aerodynamic!

Carl, we need more pumpkin pies.

Coming, Ma. [GRUNTS]

Carl, you klutz. Who's gonna clean all that up?

Sorry, Ma.

Everybody stand back. We got this.

We're licensed professionals.

Mr. Mayor, Daphne is not a witch,

and she didn't conjure a demon.

She admitted it!

[CHUCKLING] Yeah, about that...

Can I, um, you know, take it back?

Actually, I've been tasked with studying Salem's laws

regarding witchcraft, wizardry and so forth,

and it says quite clearly, no takesies-backsies.

Don't worry.

You'll have a chance to prove your innocence

at your trial.

This is crazy!

You're talking about bringing witch trials back to Salem?

Why not? The witches themselves have come back to Salem.

Wicked well put, man.

Northrup, your Rs. What did I tell you?

Like, I can't believe these people.

They pounce on the free-spirited woman,

but they have no problem

with the guy who can eat 20 pies at once

and his talking dog.

I mean, if anyone here was using magic,

it would be us.

[GROWLS]

[CROWD JEERING]

Pitchforks, check. Torches, check.

Like, I'm sorry.

Mouths are for eating, not for talking.

Mouths are for eating, not for talking.

So, it's a coven of witches.

Do you two have anything you'd like to confess?

-I'm good. -I never read Tom Sawyer.

I know it's a classic, but it's just never really interested me.

Please don't tie me up.

Northrup?

-She's in the clear. -For now, perhaps.

Okay, this is getting out of control.

There's no way this is even legal.

Thanks to Mayor Stoughton,

the whole town has gone witch-crazy.

Yeah, you hear that, angry townspeople?

You're all acting crazy!

We are not witches!

Yeah, 'cause, like, if we were,

we'd summon the Demon of Salem to come set us free!

[GROWLS]

Wow, that is a really unfortunate coincidence.

Ahhh! It's the Demon of Salem!

[ALL SCREAMING]

Did you summon him?

No, I'm not really a witch, Scooby. Are you?

I don't know anymore!

[STRAINING]

Like, hurry!

-[GRUNTING] -Fred, move!

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

[PANTING]

For the record,

she's the only one here with magical powers.

-[GRUNTS] -Like, let's get out of here.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

[ROARS]

[ROARS]

[SNARLING]

[ROARS]

-[SIGHS] -I don't know.

Maybe it's best we get out of town

before the people we're trying to help do something worse to us

than the demon we're trying to save them from.

Normally, I'd disagree,

but in this particular instance...

[CROWD MURMURING]

Seize them!

You may be right.

-Huh? -[BLEATING]

[CROWD MURMURING]

All hail the honorable Chief Justice,

Mayor William Stoughton.

[CHAIR CREAKS]

At last!

We will finish what my ancestor,

the great Lieutenant Governor William Stoughton,

began so long ago.

Northrup, read the charges.

"You are hereby charged with witchcraft,

"conjuring a demon,

"inhuman pie-eating,

"anthropomorphism..."

Whatever that is.

"...aiding and abetting witches and not reading Tom Sawyer,"

according to new legislation.

[SIGHS]

How do you plead?

Like, on my knees, usually.

With the hands-folded thing.

Look, Your Honor, this is all my fault.

I feel so much empathy for the women persecuted here in Salem,

I let my emotions cloud my judgment.

Just like everyone here is doing.

-[CROWD GRUMBLING] -[BLEATING]

Please let my friends go.

You can do what you want with me,

but give them a chance to find the truth.

They will solve this mystery.

You can bank on that.

-[GASPS] -[BLEATING]

The goat's right. Don't try to enchant us

with your magical, totally reasonable words, you witch!

Wait, what Daphne said.

"You can bank on that." That's the solution.

ALL: What?

Whoever is behind the Demon of Salem

does want to frighten everyone,

but not for revenge.

It's for the same reason Abatha Bishop

allegedly used the demon years ago.

You're right, Velma.

Yeah, but, like, how do we get out of here

to prove any of that?

We're still on trial.

A diversion.

[CLEARS THROAT] Your Honor,

while Daphne continues to speak in our defense,

however long that may be,

would the court be so kind

as to grant us a quick bathroom break?

Unless you want us to have to summon a cleanup spell.

[ALL LAUGHING NERVOUSLY]

I'll allow it.

Thunder, follow them.

Your Honor,

in the immortal words of Thomas Paine,

father of the American Revolution,

"These are the times that try men's souls."

What now, genius?

You and I make a run for it. The goat will follow me.

About time something did.

When he does, you guys head to the pie stand,

you'll know what to do.

BOTH: Yes, we will.

Hey, over here!

[BLEATING]

You want me, goat? Come and get me.

[BLEATING]

Like, it was nice of Fred to finally incorporate pie

into the monster trap.

[YELLING] Unfortunately, with the whole town either at the trial,

or too frightened to come out of their homes,

the whole area is deserted!

Including the pie stand!

Hmm, no sign of him.

Huh, we could wait.

[DEMON ROARING]

-[BOTH YELP] -Run, check. Now, check.

-[WHIMPERING] -[GROWLING]

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Yet, we have this consolation with us.

That the harder the conflict,

the more glorious the triumph.

And furthermore...

[ALL GROANING]

Like, hey, chill, dude.

We're the ones on trial.

We're taking the heat for you.

A "thank you" will suffice.

-Shaggy, Scooby! -[BLEATING]

Now!

[WHIMPERING]

[SCREAMS]

[PANTING]

-[BLEATING] -[GROWLS]

[GRUNTS]

So for all the wrongly-accused,

innocent people of this town,

know that I never have, never could,

and never will summon the Demon of Salem.

-[CRASHES] -[GROWLS]

-[CROWD GASPS] -It's the Demon of Salem!

Ugh, why does that keep happening?

Don't worry, folks. Daphne's no witch.

And this is no demon.

ALL: Carl?

-Carl? -Carl!

R-r-r!

Car-r-rl!

With an R!

What's an "ah"?

It was Carl.

And his mother, Mrs. Baker, was in on it, too.

Search the pie booth, and you'll find a tunnel leading under the bank.

There it is.

FRED: The metal filing we found were carbon steel,

typically used in the construction of bank vaults.

The Bakers were planning a bank heist.

VELMA: The heist had to occur during the festival

to keep the pie booth next to the bank.

Carl dug the tunnel

and was using a carbonite drill to break into the vault.

But a carbonite drill is very loud,

so what they needed to cover up the noise

was a diversion.

FRED: Carl used the legend of the Demon of Salem

to create witch hysteria in Salem again.

With the whole town either too scared to leave their homes,

or too distracted by the Mayor's witch hunt,

he was free to rob the bank undetected.

VELMA: The final clue were the white powder

on the material from the demon.

It was flour,

an ingredient needed in large amounts

to make as many pies as the Bakers do.

I also noticed the demon was extremely athletic

and light on his feet, er, hooves.

If you look closely inside Mrs. Baker's pie booth,

you'll see medals on display

from Carl's high school gymnastics competitions.

He was an expert gymnast,

and she is still a proud mother.

They caught me, Ma.

It's not your fault.

It's these meddling witches.

They cast spells on me and my poor, innocent son

and made us do it!

Eh, worth a shot.

It appears I owe you kids an apology.

Thank you for stopping me

from making the same mistakes our ancestors did.

Thanks, Mayor.

Actually, I think old William Stoughton would be proud of you.

Then he probably would have tried and convicted you

of conspiring with witches.

Sounds like him, yeah.

And I'm so proud

to have finally resolved my differences with Thunder.

I think I understand goats a little better...

-[BLEATING] -Ow! Ooh! Ouch! Stop it!

Heel! [GRUNTS] Ahhh!

I thought we were cool, man! I thought we were cool!