Original subtitles

[BOTH STRAINING]

[BOTH EXHALE]

I cannot believe how big this bird is.

I think we earned a break.

Wow, look at all this stuff.

This is gonna be the most spectacular display of Ice Age finds ever.

Yeah, I'd say it's all pretty...

...cool.

Ha! I see what you did there.

[LAUGHS] Wait, wait, wait.

Hey, "snow" down there, buddy.

Pffft, come on.

Maybe he's just trying to find a way to...break the ice.

Hold on, hold on.

We should turn up the heat.

This guy is chilled to the bone.

[BOTH LAUGH]

[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING]

Hey, what's in there?

Last I heard,

it is the oldest precious stone jewelry ever discovered.

[ICE CRACKING]

Oldest?

Don't you mean the...

...coldest. [LAUGHS]

Yeah, you know it's kind of getting old now.

Don't you mean, "cold" now?

Seriously, stop.

Stop as in... Yeah, actually, what rhymes with stop?

-[WATER TRICKLING] -Whoa, where did the...

Uh, shouldn't this be frozen?

[CRASH]

[BOTH GASP]

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

He's having a meltdown!

Stop with the puns!

-[BOTH SCREAM] -[ROARS]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

SCOOBY-DOO: Scooby-Dooby-Doo!

DAPHNE: Here we are.

Amazing, huh?

Every year the ice hotel is rebuilt with a new design.

A work of art created to give visitors a fresh experience each time they visit.

Oh, very impressive, Daphne.

So, why does your family own an ice hotel?

Oh, we just own stock in it.

Great Grandpa Blake was afraid the government would freeze his assets.

-So he beat them to it. -[CAMERA CLICKS]

He had no concept of money

or of metaphor, for that matter.

[CRASH]

[CRASH]

Well, this time I'm prepared for anything my nemesis, water,

solid, liquid or gas, has to throw at me.

-[STRAINING] -Don't worry, Velma.

We took lots of family vacations here, it's really safe.

Ice. Safe. Tell that to the dinosaurs.

Hey, Scoob. Like, what's with that old cliche of people

getting their tongue stuck on ice?

Just lick-hater propaganda.

Yeah, I mean, like under what circumstance does someone decide to lick

a frozen wall or flagpole

often enough that everyone knows tongue sticking is a thing?

[CELESTIAL MUSIC PLAYING]

Obviously an urban legend.

[CELESTIAL MUSIC PLAYING]

What do you say we check out our rooms?

Then I'd like to go watch them set up the Ice Age exhibit.

It's no secret that's the real reason

I agreed to come to this frozen death trap.

No offense, Daphne.

Me? Real reason?

Why would I care about a science exhibit?

That's much more up your alley.

If anyone had ulterior motives regarding the exhibit, it would be you.

Uh, that's what I just said.

Daphne, are you...

-[SCOOBY-DOO SCREAMS] -SHAGGY: Help!

BOTH: Help us.

What happened?

Tongues are frozen to the wall!

Everyone, please remain calm, I'm Lisa, a licensed frozen tongue removal expert.

[HAIRDRYER WHIRRING]

SCOOBY-DOO: Thank you.

Are you the bellhop here, Lisa?

WOMAN: [WITH A SWEDISH ACCENT] We don't hop on ice.

Uh, ahhh...

Oh guys, this is Ms. Anja,

she co-owns the hotel along with my family.

It's a pleasure as always to see you, Ms. Blake.

Unfortunately, this may not be the best time for a visit.

We've been having some [SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE]

BOTH: [GASP]... [SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE]

Guys, it's just Swedish.

BOTH: [GASP] Swedish?

Ugh, never mind.

What kind of difficulties, Ms. Anja?

A scientist recently uncovered a frozen prehistoric ice man

which was going to be the centerpiece of the hotel's extensive

Pleistocene Epoch exhibition.

Until he thawed out and went on a rampage.

We can't find him anywhere.

A thawed, real ice man?

Wow, sounds like a mystery.

I cannot have

the grand opening of the exhibit tomorrow

destroyed by a rampaging caveman.

Don't worry, Ms. Anja, the gang and I'll get to the bottom of this

and stop this ice man.

Uh, yeah sure, you know, if we get a chance.

After all we have a very strict itinerary.

What with looking at ice...

Stuff. [LAUGHS UNCOMFORTABLY]

Since when have you ever cared about itineraries?

Uh... Since...

[GASPS] Look, a fake distraction!

[RUBBER SQUEAKING]

SHAGGY AND SCOOBY-DOO: Hello, help, please.

[HAIRDRYER WHIRRING]

I can't believe a real ice man is wandering around the hotel somewhere.

How cool is that?

-Like, not as cool as that ice-bed. -Whoa!

BOTH: Oh, ooh... [CRASH]

We should split up and look for clues.

Uh, where's Daphne?

I don't know, she's been acting strange.

Well, different, Daphne strange.

Only Daphne could find this many variations of strange.

[SHIVERING] Like, maybe she's trying to find someplace to get warm.

Even the beds are ice.

Who knew an entire hotel made completely of ice

[SHIVERING] would be so cold?

Everyone?

It looks like the only consistently warm area

in the hotel is the steam room.

Huh, steam.

Just another way to get me, huh, water?

Steam room, huh?

Consistently warm, huh?

Scoob and I better check it out for clues, huh, Fred?

-Well... -We accept this burden.

Ah, like this is just what we needed. Steam.

I wasn't sure about going to an ice hotel,

but now we're cookin'.

Yeah, they look done.

[EATING NOISILY]

And now as we promised, let's look for clues.

BOTH: Hmm, hmm.

Hmm, hmm.

Hmm, hmm.

Uh, I don't see anything.

Like, it's a complete dead end.

Oh well, more hot dogs?

[GRUNTS]

Agreed, they are delicious.

Who are you agreeing with?

[ICE MAN GRUMBLES]

[ROARS]

[BOTH SCREAM]

BOTH: Ice man!

[CRASH]

-[SCREECH] -[LOCK CLICKING]

[UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING]

[ROARS]

[LOCK CLICKING]

[GRUNTS]

[CRASH]

[GRUNTS]

Huh?

[KISSES]

[GRUNTS]

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

SCOOBY-DOO: The coast is clear.

BOTH: Ahhh, ahhh!

How does this keep happening?

[DOOR CREAKS]

[THUD]

Ugh.

Velma, are you sure all that gear is necessary?

It doesn't seem like you've had that many water-related issues so far.

That's just like water.

Lower you into a state of confidence so you let your guard down

and then, whammo, sucker.

Yep, that's water.

Daphne?

Ahhh! Oh, hey guys.

What's up?

What are you doing here, Daphne?

Oh, you know, nothing, just hangin'.

Are those night vision goggles?

-[POWERING DOWN] -What, these, are they?

[GASPS] He swore they were ski goggles.

-Who? -The guy at the night vision goggle shop.

Last time I buy anything there.

Daphne, what is going on with you?

If this is one of your things that you do every day

and then never do it again, like the puppets or whatever?

I gotta say it's really not a clear read.

[SCOOBY-DOO AND SHAGGY SCREAMING]

-[SCREECHING] -[CRASHES]

Scooby, Shaggy, did you find the ice man?

The ice man chaseth.

But we losteth him.

Well, maybe he left some tracks we can follow.

Uh, I doubt it.

It was important for primitive hunters like our ice man

to learn to cover their tracks, lest...

The predator become the prey.

[LAUGHS EVILLY]

What? Geez, like, I'm the problem around here?

Ahh! I found the problem!

-[GRUNTS] -[ALL SCREAM]

[ICE MAN GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

Like, can we not split up this time?

Good idea, take a hard left up ahead.

FRED: Now! ALL: Uh, whoa!

[SCOOBY-DOO AND SHAGGY SCREAMING]

[GROWLS]

Like, we can't even blame Fred for this.

The ice failed us.

-I blame Fred. -Yeah, pretty much.

[ICE MAN GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

Huh?

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you...

-Man. -In his most primitive form.

[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]

Huh?

Tell us about yourself, would you?

[GRUNTS]

Therein lies our problem.

This prehistoric ice man

cannot pronounce his own name.

For shame.

[AUDIENCE AWING]

But today we will change that.

For we will teach man,

for the first time,

to speak.

[AUDIENCE APPLAUDING]

Speak.

[GARBLED] My name...

[GRUNTS]

Again, feel the words.

Taste them with your tongue.

[IMITATES EATING]

[GARBLED] My name...

[GRUNTS]

Keep your cool, we can do this together.

Together.

[MOUTHING] My name...

[GARBLED] My name

is Ice Man.

[MOUTHING] My name...

[GARBLED] My name...

[THUD]

[GARBLED] My name...

Is Ice Man.

Like, come again?

My name...

Is Ice Man.

One more time.

My name is Ice Man!

BOTH: You did it!

[AUDIENCE CHEERING LOUDLY]

My name is Ice Man.

My name is Ice Man!

-[SOBS] -Yes, it is. Yes, it is!

And now, read this.

Hmm...

Got you! Bye-bye!

Got you! Bye-bye!

Got you, bye-bye?

[AUDIENCE CHEERING]

Huh?

[ROARS]

[CRASH]

Velma, it really is perfectly safe.

Ha! The moment I let my guard down,

Dihydrogen Monoxide will strike.

SCOOBY-DOO AND SHAGGY: Pull the... [SCREAMING]

[BOTH SCREAMING]

[CRASHES]

SCOOBY-DOO: You got to be kidding.

-[SCREECHING] -Not to fear, Lisa's here.

-[HAIRDRYER WHIRRING] -[SPRING TWANGS]

Ahhh! [GRUNTS]

-[HAIRDRYER WHIRRING] -[SPRING TWANGS]

SHAGGY: Ahhh! [GRUNTS]

[HEAVY FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

Ah, you must be the kids looking for my ice man.

Your ice man?

Yes, I'm Dr. Vantee, the anthropologist who found him.

Then lost him.

Wily, that one, especially for a guy who isn't fit enough to be naturally selected.

Do you have any idea what a prehistoric ice man might want here?

No, we found him in Europe recently,

in fact, in the same place I made one of my first great finds decades ago.

The oldest precious stone jewelry ever discovered.

For all I know, the fellow might want his necklace back.

Like, he didn't really strike me as a shopping for an anniversary present type.

Well, hopefully we catch him in time for the exhibit.

Tourist dollars fund my research.

Nothing brings people in like some poor dope in an ice cube.

[ALL SCREAM]

Well, I guess we should check out the storage area

where the ice man first got free.

Huh?

Okay, gang, spread out and look around.

Yeah, gotta hurry. Exhibition is coming up fast,

just 10 hours, eight minutes and 22 seconds

Daphne, would please tell me what's going on?

You're rappelling from ceilings, climbing on walls,

maintaining a general awareness of the date and time.

[LAUGHS] Oh, Fred,

stop being so suspicious and searching for clues about me.

Since when have you been into mysteries?

Always.

VELMA: Ah-ha!

What is it, Velma?

It looks like some kind of...

[LASER FIRES]

[CRASH]

Zoinks!

Velma's gone water crazy.

No, I haven't. I just found that on the ground.

Who would leave something so dangerous just laying around?

[ALL STRAINING]

I did not prepare for this.

Oh, hey, gang.

You must have accidently triggered one of my diversion devices.

[ALL GRUNT]

Diversion devices?

Oh, there's my laser cutter.

Laser cutter?

Guys, this is gonna take twice as long

if you keep repeating the last phrase I say.

Phrase I say?

Okay, Daphne,

what is your interest in this Ice Age exhibition?

Uh, I don't really have time to explain.

-In fact... -[BEEPING]

[BEEPING QUICKLY]

Duck!

What the... Daphne,

did you just blow the vault?

What are you doing?

[GROWLS]

Great. Perfect timing.

Give or take 23,000 years.

Run! Then explain.

[ROCK MUSIC PLAYING]

♪ Do you want Do you want to try?

♪ Do want to let me try?

♪ Save me

♪ S-s-s-save me

♪ Save me

♪ S-s-s-save me

♪ Do you want cross the line?

♪ Do you want to waste your time?

♪ Picking up the pieces every night after nightfall

♪ Save me

♪ S-s-s-save me

♪ Save me

♪ S-s-s-save me

♪ Save me

♪ S-s-s-save me

♪ Do you want cross the line?

♪ Do you want to waste your time?

♪ Picking up the pieces every night after nightfall

♪ S-s-s-save me

♪ From you

Ah-ha... [SPEAKING OTHER LANGUAGE]

Caught with your beard in the mail box

or your hand in the cookie jar. Ugh.

Whatever.

We're in trouble.

These precious items are for the hotel's exhibition.

And here all of you are, trying to steal them.

You are going to isfaengsel.

Ice jail.

Now I have to lie uncomfortably atop it.

I'm sorry, guys, this is all my fault.

We didn't even solve the mystery.

We might have, had Daphne not decided to go on a heist.

Ugh, and I would have gotten away with it, too,

if it weren't for you meddling...

[GASPS] I totally get that now.

Okay, Daphne, I've got to say, I've been fairly patient up to this point.

What with you acting strange, evasive, blowing vaults,

sending all your friends to ice jail and so forth.

But now I think I'm actually within my rights you ask you,

even perhaps a bit aggressively,

[SHOUTS] What the heck is going on? [ECHOES]

I loved Mimi. And she had no right without asking me.

That sounds like the end of a story,

could you back up about 18 steps?

[SIGHS] I was breaking into the vault to steal back my pendant,

the Ice Age jewelry Dr. Vantee mentioned.

He found it on an expedition funded by my great grandma Mimi Blake.

She gave it to me for my 10th birthday and I treasured it.

I kept it locked in my room at home for safety.

From yourself?

No...

But my mother had lent it to the hotel's exhibit without my permission.

She assured me it would be safe.

So I came here to get my property back

and to prove to mother that it wasn't.

From yourself.

I didn't think it was actually wrong

to break into you own hotel and steal your own necklace.

Well, why didn't you just tell us?

I wasn't about to drag you into this mess.

What if we got caught?

We'd all be sent to ice jail.

I was not gonna let that happen.

Uh, Daphne,

that's exactly what happened.

So, not only is it the worst case scenario,

you can also add lying to your friends on top of everything else.

Oh, I'm sorry, guys.

I had no idea an ice man would show up and ruin my perfect plan.

Or is it the other way around?

Fred, that's it.

Ugh.

[STRAINING]

That's the answer.

I'm totally lost.

But, like, I bet we gotta get out of here

'cause we have an ice man to catch.

How're we going to get out of here?

These walls have gotta be two feet of solid ice.

Say, Velma,

it really seems like water has been picking on you for a long time.

It's now made me its prisoner.

Well, you came pretty prepared,

I think it's about time you let some of your water aggression out.

Along with us.

-Okay, water, you brought this on yourself. -[BLADES SWISH]

Payback.

Ahhh...

[GRUNTING]

[PANTING]

[COUGHS]

Whoa. [ECHOING]

-That felt so good. -[SAFE LOCK CLICKING]

I mean, that was seriously cathartic.

And disturbing.

Honestly Velma, I think you owe water an apology now.

[SAFE LOCK CLICKING]

Got it.

Ha! So who was it that was saying I wouldn't make a great cat burglar?

Uh, none of us said that.

[GRUNTS]

Run!

[GRUNTS]

[GRUNTS]

[GUN SHOT]

[GRUNTS]

[LASER FIRES]

[CRASHES]

Huh?

The wheel. Handy.

Your 23,000-year-old ice man is...

ALL: Ms. Anja?

Only 46 years old according to carbon dating.

Turns out I wasn't the only one trying to steal my pendant.

VELMA: Being the owne of an ice hotel,

and an expert on all things frozen,

she was able to fool everyone into believing the ice man broke out of the ice.

FRED: She used the ice man to scare the guests away

long enough to try and steal Daphne's pendant,

which she blamed on the ice man.

Dr. Vantee himself even suggested

the necklace could have been made by the ice man

35,000 years ago.

But not knowing enough about anthropology,

Ms. Anja made some mistakes

which were clues that the ice man wasn't what he seemed to be.

For instance, the ice man was curiously unafraid of his natural enemies.

But why, Ms. Anja?

Why would you do this?

Simple. Ms. Anja hated co-owning the ice hotel with the Blakes.

She was planning on selling the necklace in order to buy out their part in the hotel.

Proving it was never safe here to begin with.

Luckily Daphne was executing a heist of her own.

I wish there was a Swedish word I could call you

more appropriate than "meddling."

But there isn't.

Indblanding?

-Nah, doesn't have the same gusto. -Agreed.

But wait, where is my real ice man?

Hidden, but not in the most subtle of places.

You know, actually I'm starting to enjoy this.

Five more minutes, please?

Well, Daph, I'm glad you got your necklace back.

And we solved the mystery.

But I hope next time you'll tell us before you try anything like this again.

Yes, Fred, I promise next time I'll tell you.

Wrong answer! No next time!