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1
00:00:07,641 --> 00:00:10,043
‐ I am a fully grown half‐angel.
2
00:00:10,077 --> 00:00:12,279
I am the guardian.
‐ I'm sworn to protect Waverly!
3
00:00:12,312 --> 00:00:14,948
‐ They're working on some
inter‐dimensional gateway.
4
00:00:14,982 --> 00:00:16,984
‐ It's the 2005 chili cook‐off
all over again.
5
00:00:17,017 --> 00:00:18,619
‐ I'm gonna be waiting for you
6
00:00:18,652 --> 00:00:20,120
back in Purgatory.
7
00:00:20,153 --> 00:00:21,288
‐ Ahh!
8
00:00:21,321 --> 00:00:23,290
I'm here, and we gotta
get back there!
9
00:00:23,323 --> 00:00:24,491
Ahh!
10
00:00:24,525 --> 00:00:26,326
‐ No...
11
00:00:26,360 --> 00:00:27,294
‐ Waverly.
12
00:00:28,328 --> 00:00:30,564
‐ The town...
‐ You've been gone 18 months,
13
00:00:30,597 --> 00:00:32,733
three weeks, and four days.
14
00:00:32,766 --> 00:00:34,301
All of you have.
15
00:00:34,334 --> 00:00:36,537
(intense music)
16
00:00:37,471 --> 00:00:40,374
(tense music)
17
00:00:40,407 --> 00:00:43,277
‐ Someone has been handing out
hemp neckties.
18
00:00:44,011 --> 00:00:45,946
‐ That's a clear fashion don't.
19
00:00:46,380 --> 00:00:47,581
Who the hell? And why?
20
00:00:47,614 --> 00:00:48,949
‐ Frontier justice.
21
00:00:48,982 --> 00:00:50,517
Retribution must not only
be paid,
22
00:00:50,551 --> 00:00:52,119
it must be seen to be paid.
23
00:00:52,152 --> 00:00:55,055
‐ The old‐timey version of
"pics or it didn't happen".
24
00:00:55,689 --> 00:00:57,424
Something here is pretty off.
25
00:00:57,457 --> 00:00:58,525
Shorty's.
26
00:00:58,559 --> 00:01:00,961
We think better with a little
fire in our bellies.
27
00:01:00,994 --> 00:01:02,996
(soft music)
28
00:01:03,030 --> 00:01:05,032
(indistinct chattering)
29
00:01:07,134 --> 00:01:09,303
Uh, Nedley and I were here,
30
00:01:09,336 --> 00:01:11,939
after you followed Waverly
up the stairs.
31
00:01:11,972 --> 00:01:13,640
We drank your tequila,
32
00:01:13,674 --> 00:01:15,709
uh, but we did not macramé.
33
00:01:15,742 --> 00:01:18,545
So unless this is just
a surprise makeover
34
00:01:18,579 --> 00:01:20,614
by The Property Brothers...
35
00:01:20,647 --> 00:01:23,150
On occasion, I will put it on
36
00:01:23,183 --> 00:01:26,086
in the middle of the afternoon,
if I have cleaning to do.
37
00:01:28,021 --> 00:01:29,156
‐ What is this menu?
38
00:01:29,189 --> 00:01:31,592
"Gunfight At The Okra Corral."
39
00:01:31,625 --> 00:01:33,527
What the hell
is a Cock Holliday?
40
00:01:33,560 --> 00:01:36,229
‐ It says
it is chicken bone broth.
41
00:01:36,263 --> 00:01:38,565
Is that not simply soup?
‐ Wynonna?
42
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:40,133
(sighs)
‐ Chrissy Nedley.
43
00:01:40,167 --> 00:01:42,102
Are you a sight for sore livers.
44
00:01:42,135 --> 00:01:45,105
‐ How dare you?!
(Man): Hey, whoa!
45
00:01:45,138 --> 00:01:46,940
‐ What the fig, Chrissy?!
46
00:01:46,974 --> 00:01:48,375
‐ Wynonna.
‐ Ahh!
47
00:01:48,408 --> 00:01:50,544
(grunting)
48
00:01:50,577 --> 00:01:52,379
(guns clicking)
49
00:01:52,412 --> 00:01:54,047
‐ Let her go.
50
00:01:58,652 --> 00:02:00,187
Alright, say your piece,
Chrissy.
51
00:02:00,220 --> 00:02:01,688
‐ Say your piece, Chrissy,
just say your piece.
52
00:02:01,722 --> 00:02:03,423
If you wanna chat, I can chat.
I'm a good listener.
53
00:02:03,457 --> 00:02:07,060
‐ Wynonna Earp, I am placing you
under citizen's arrest.
54
00:02:07,094 --> 00:02:09,229
For the murder of my father.
55
00:02:09,262 --> 00:02:11,298
Randall Nedley.
56
00:02:11,331 --> 00:02:15,168
(music intensifies)
57
00:02:16,436 --> 00:02:18,505
‐ It's just so good to be home.
58
00:02:23,010 --> 00:02:25,278
♪ 'Cause I gave you
all I got to give ♪
59
00:02:25,312 --> 00:02:28,015
♪ I know that ain't
no way to live ♪
60
00:02:28,048 --> 00:02:30,617
♪ So I told that devil ♪
61
00:02:30,651 --> 00:02:32,919
♪ To take you back ♪
62
00:02:33,587 --> 00:02:35,522
♪ I told that devil ♪
63
00:02:35,555 --> 00:02:38,191
♪ To take you back ♪
64
00:02:39,459 --> 00:02:41,061
‐ I would never hurt Nedley!
65
00:02:41,094 --> 00:02:42,963
‐ As if we'd take the word
of an Earp!
66
00:02:42,996 --> 00:02:44,364
‐ Your dad did. He trusted me!
67
00:02:44,398 --> 00:02:46,967
‐ Unhand her at once!
‐ Nedley can't be dead.
68
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,135
‐ We demand proof.
69
00:02:48,168 --> 00:02:50,070
‐ He was last seen with Wynonna.
70
00:02:50,103 --> 00:02:52,005
And that's when she disappeared
for a year and a half!
71
00:02:52,039 --> 00:02:55,142
What a coincidence!
‐ Your dad was helping me!
72
00:02:55,175 --> 00:02:55,976
He was hurt,
73
00:02:56,009 --> 00:02:58,278
but I left him safe
with Mercedes!
74
00:02:58,311 --> 00:02:59,546
Wait. When did you say?
75
00:02:59,579 --> 00:03:01,615
‐ We were gone mere days.
You lie.
76
00:03:01,648 --> 00:03:02,649
(Wynonna): No, no!
77
00:03:02,683 --> 00:03:04,251
‐ We've been waiting too long.
78
00:03:04,284 --> 00:03:05,385
‐ No!
79
00:03:05,419 --> 00:03:07,954
(crowd shouting angrily)
80
00:03:08,955 --> 00:03:10,924
‐ Doc!
(screaming)
81
00:03:10,957 --> 00:03:13,527
‐ Wynonna!
(gunshots)
82
00:03:14,361 --> 00:03:17,397
‐ Put the rope down
and back away from the woman.
83
00:03:19,666 --> 00:03:21,301
‐ Sheriff.
84
00:03:21,334 --> 00:03:23,303
‐ That's not the sheriff.
Where's Nicole?
85
00:03:25,706 --> 00:03:27,340
‐ Miss Chrissy,
86
00:03:27,374 --> 00:03:29,109
your dad lived his life
for the law.
87
00:03:29,142 --> 00:03:31,011
What would he think
of your behavior now?
88
00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:33,013
‐ You didn't know him.
‐ No.
89
00:03:33,046 --> 00:03:34,715
But I do know this is not
the way we do things
90
00:03:34,748 --> 00:03:36,216
in Purgatory.
91
00:03:36,683 --> 00:03:38,952
(Man): We want justice!
92
00:03:41,188 --> 00:03:42,556
‐ Thank you.
93
00:03:42,589 --> 00:03:43,924
(Woman): Yeah, this isn't right!
94
00:03:43,957 --> 00:03:45,358
‐ Just like the criminal vermin
95
00:03:45,392 --> 00:03:47,227
we hung last Monday,
96
00:03:47,260 --> 00:03:49,930
Miss Earp shall have
a trial first.
97
00:03:51,131 --> 00:03:52,966
‐ Get Waverly! Get Nicole!
98
00:03:52,999 --> 00:03:55,102
‐ I shall get everyone.
99
00:03:59,272 --> 00:04:02,142
(Waverly humming)
100
00:04:04,544 --> 00:04:06,246
‐ Sup?
‐ Whoa!
101
00:04:07,280 --> 00:04:09,649
‐ Valdez. Rachel Valdez.
102
00:04:09,683 --> 00:04:10,951
‐ Hi.
103
00:04:10,984 --> 00:04:13,153
I'm, uh...
‐ Cold?
104
00:04:15,021 --> 00:04:16,957
‐ Yeah. Frozen.
105
00:04:16,990 --> 00:04:18,425
I mean, I'm practically Elsa!
106
00:04:19,960 --> 00:04:23,163
I had no idea you were...
‐ Kombucha?
107
00:04:23,196 --> 00:04:24,131
‐ Pardon?
108
00:04:24,164 --> 00:04:26,533
‐ I make it myself.
And after last night,
109
00:04:26,566 --> 00:04:28,201
I bet you need some hydration.
110
00:04:29,069 --> 00:04:31,471
(giggling)
‐ Mmm.
111
00:04:31,505 --> 00:04:33,507
Microbes.
112
00:04:33,540 --> 00:04:35,475
So, you're staying here?
113
00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:37,444
(bell ringing)
114
00:04:37,477 --> 00:04:39,246
‐ Batman in the microwave!
115
00:04:39,279 --> 00:04:41,181
‐ What? What is that?
116
00:04:41,214 --> 00:04:43,350
‐ There's something in the trap.
‐ Which one?
117
00:04:44,117 --> 00:04:46,153
‐ Behind the barn.
‐ What are we trapping?
118
00:04:46,186 --> 00:04:47,521
(gun clicking)
119
00:04:47,554 --> 00:04:49,456
‐ Monsters.
120
00:04:49,489 --> 00:04:50,357
‐ Huh.
121
00:04:50,390 --> 00:04:52,893
(intense music)
122
00:04:58,665 --> 00:05:00,300
‐ There's ten traps
on the homestead.
123
00:05:00,333 --> 00:05:02,636
We gotta do a full
circuit check every two hours.
124
00:05:02,669 --> 00:05:04,504
‐ I thought the curse
was broken.
125
00:05:04,538 --> 00:05:05,972
‐ Traps aren't for Revenants.
126
00:05:06,006 --> 00:05:07,674
There's all sorts of things
in the woods now.
127
00:05:07,707 --> 00:05:09,242
‐ And one of them,
128
00:05:09,276 --> 00:05:11,511
this big ugly troll,
wants in here bad.
129
00:05:11,545 --> 00:05:14,214
(Doc): Oh, tarnation!
130
00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:17,984
Thank you for the exceptionally
tight welcome.
131
00:05:18,018 --> 00:05:21,321
‐ Rachel, Doc, Doc, Rachel.
132
00:05:21,354 --> 00:05:23,156
‐ Sup?
133
00:05:23,190 --> 00:05:24,424
‐ Don't move.
134
00:05:25,125 --> 00:05:28,061
‐ I am rather determined not to.
135
00:05:29,496 --> 00:05:31,097
Ohh!
136
00:05:31,131 --> 00:05:33,500
It is good to see you,
Sheriff Haught.
137
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:36,570
‐ Yeah, well, these days,
it's just Nicole, or...
138
00:05:36,603 --> 00:05:38,405
"that crazy ginger bitch."
139
00:05:41,174 --> 00:05:41,975
‐ God, it's...
140
00:05:42,008 --> 00:05:43,643
I'm so, so glad you made it,
Henry.
141
00:05:43,677 --> 00:05:45,045
(smooch)
Ugh!
142
00:05:45,078 --> 00:05:46,947
You smell aggressively bad.
143
00:05:46,980 --> 00:05:49,115
‐ Yeah, we use skunk juice
to bait the traps.
144
00:05:49,149 --> 00:05:50,951
‐ Wynonna isn't marinating
in skunk juice
145
00:05:50,984 --> 00:05:52,085
in one of these, is she?
146
00:05:52,118 --> 00:05:54,354
‐ Wynonna is in jail.
‐ What?
147
00:05:54,387 --> 00:05:55,488
‐ They have framed her.
148
00:05:55,522 --> 00:05:57,958
For the murder of Randy Nedley.
149
00:05:57,991 --> 00:05:59,659
(intense music)
150
00:05:59,693 --> 00:06:00,961
‐ Who are you?
151
00:06:00,994 --> 00:06:02,495
‐ You can call me the Sheriff.
152
00:06:02,529 --> 00:06:04,564
‐ Okay, then you can call me
an Uber.
153
00:06:04,598 --> 00:06:07,667
Ooh! Uh...
154
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:09,569
‐ Back away from the glass,
6‐1‐3‐3.
155
00:06:09,603 --> 00:06:11,104
‐ Dude...
156
00:06:11,137 --> 00:06:13,039
There's a guy in there,
I'm not going in there.
157
00:06:13,073 --> 00:06:14,174
‐ Yeah, main cell's
chock‐a‐block.
158
00:06:14,207 --> 00:06:17,477
But believe you me,
he's far from the worst of 'em.
159
00:06:19,446 --> 00:06:20,614
‐ Uh...
160
00:06:20,647 --> 00:06:23,183
Assless chap?
I want my phone call!
161
00:06:23,984 --> 00:06:27,020
I want my phone call!
‐ Sorry I can't hear you.
162
00:06:27,053 --> 00:06:29,055
‐ I demand a phone call!
163
00:06:31,625 --> 00:06:35,161
Who are you?
‐ Casey. You?
164
00:06:35,195 --> 00:06:37,264
‐ Local nogoodnik, Wynonna Earp.
165
00:06:37,297 --> 00:06:39,466
‐ Ahh!
166
00:06:39,499 --> 00:06:40,533
I thought I'd be safe in here!
167
00:06:40,567 --> 00:06:42,402
‐ Wow. Didn't even
have to steal your pudding cup
168
00:06:42,435 --> 00:06:44,004
to establish who's boss. Nice.
169
00:06:44,037 --> 00:06:47,407
‐ From demons
and famous demon hunters.
170
00:06:50,010 --> 00:06:51,511
‐ Back up one sec.
171
00:06:51,544 --> 00:06:54,948
Pretend I haven't been here
for, say, a year and a half,
172
00:06:54,981 --> 00:06:56,583
and just explain to me.
173
00:06:56,616 --> 00:06:58,051
‐ Uh, since the town
was evacuated
174
00:06:58,084 --> 00:07:00,487
for the forest fires?
‐ Say I remember that.
175
00:07:00,520 --> 00:07:02,589
‐ Oh, well,
the townspeople left,
176
00:07:02,622 --> 00:07:03,556
but demons came.
177
00:07:03,590 --> 00:07:05,492
You know when there's,
like, a bush party?
178
00:07:05,525 --> 00:07:07,327
And nobody knows
who started it,
179
00:07:07,360 --> 00:07:09,496
but everybody hears
about it somehow?
180
00:07:09,529 --> 00:07:10,964
They all just started
showing up.
181
00:07:10,997 --> 00:07:12,165
‐ Everybody shows up for bush.
182
00:07:12,198 --> 00:07:14,868
‐ Yeah, the townspeople
were allowed to come back home,
183
00:07:14,901 --> 00:07:16,670
and there was, like,
an ongoing demon rager,
184
00:07:16,703 --> 00:07:19,005
centered around the woods.
185
00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:21,441
‐ The stairs.
‐ I'm not, I'm not staring!
186
00:07:21,474 --> 00:07:23,043
Also I'm only a half‐demon!
187
00:07:23,076 --> 00:07:24,110
So, you know,
please don't shoot!
188
00:07:24,144 --> 00:07:25,245
‐ Casey, don't be a weenie.
189
00:07:25,278 --> 00:07:27,380
I don't even
have my gun anymore.
190
00:07:27,414 --> 00:07:28,581
In here...
191
00:07:29,249 --> 00:07:31,151
Obviously the Sheriff
would have taken it.
192
00:07:31,651 --> 00:07:33,520
‐ Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool.
193
00:07:33,553 --> 00:07:34,621
(sighing)
194
00:07:34,654 --> 00:07:37,324
‐ So the woods are full
of monsters.
195
00:07:37,357 --> 00:07:38,925
‐ Crawling with 'em.
196
00:07:38,959 --> 00:07:41,594
These days, the only place
scarier than in here...
197
00:07:41,628 --> 00:07:43,396
is out there.
198
00:07:43,430 --> 00:07:46,333
(birds squawking)
199
00:07:48,568 --> 00:07:52,005
(brakes squealing)
200
00:07:53,506 --> 00:07:55,909
(ominous music)
201
00:07:56,509 --> 00:07:58,912
(metal clanging)
202
00:08:02,148 --> 00:08:03,984
(screaming, monster growling)
203
00:08:08,688 --> 00:08:12,225
‐ I have a half‐knitted scarf
I was making him for Christmas.
204
00:08:12,258 --> 00:08:14,160
His waders
are still in the barn.
205
00:08:14,194 --> 00:08:15,261
‐ Yeah. I know, Waves.
206
00:08:15,295 --> 00:08:17,630
It's tough to think
of a world without Randy Nedley.
207
00:08:17,664 --> 00:08:21,434
(kettle whistling)
‐ How can he just... be gone?
208
00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:24,404
‐ It was months of chaos
after the evacuation ended.
209
00:08:24,437 --> 00:08:26,306
People came back, yeah, but...
210
00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:29,142
to be blunt,
others just disappeared.
211
00:08:29,642 --> 00:08:30,610
‐ Kate?
212
00:08:30,643 --> 00:08:32,645
‐ I saw her on
one of the evacuation trains.
213
00:08:32,679 --> 00:08:33,713
But beyond that...
214
00:08:33,747 --> 00:08:35,715
‐ Jeremy? And Robin?
215
00:08:35,749 --> 00:08:37,217
‐ Jeremy's getting by,
216
00:08:37,250 --> 00:08:39,619
though I haven't heard
from him in months.
217
00:08:39,652 --> 00:08:41,621
Robin...
218
00:08:43,490 --> 00:08:45,258
‐ How could we have been
in that garden
219
00:08:45,291 --> 00:08:46,493
for a year and a half?
220
00:08:46,526 --> 00:08:49,596
‐ We were not.
Time must be differentiated,
221
00:08:49,629 --> 00:08:51,331
fluid in some manner.
222
00:08:51,364 --> 00:08:54,200
‐ Yeah, God,
it's such a mind‐frog.
223
00:08:54,234 --> 00:08:55,802
I mean, how old even am I?
224
00:08:55,835 --> 00:08:57,170
(gasps)
225
00:08:57,203 --> 00:08:58,772
I missed so many
Property Brothers!
226
00:08:59,706 --> 00:09:01,207
‐ I feel that.
227
00:09:01,241 --> 00:09:03,243
‐ At least if we'd have lived
the past 18 months,
228
00:09:03,276 --> 00:09:04,377
it would be easier to‐‐
229
00:09:04,411 --> 00:09:06,880
‐ There was nothing easy
about those months. Not a thing.
230
00:09:06,913 --> 00:09:09,349
‐ No, I didn't mean it
like that.
231
00:09:10,383 --> 00:09:11,718
Not like that at all.
232
00:09:11,751 --> 00:09:13,553
‐ There's no almond milk.
233
00:09:13,586 --> 00:09:16,423
It's still hard
to get some things. Sorry.
234
00:09:16,456 --> 00:09:19,859
‐ Please don't say you're sorry
anymore, okay?
235
00:09:19,893 --> 00:09:21,428
You don't need to be.
236
00:09:21,461 --> 00:09:23,630
‐ What you have done, Sheriff...
237
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:28,868
Nicole...
238
00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:30,870
is nothing short of heroic.
239
00:09:30,904 --> 00:09:32,439
In the face of all adversity,
240
00:09:32,472 --> 00:09:35,208
you alone
kept the homestead safe.
241
00:09:36,309 --> 00:09:37,710
‐ I had Rachel.
242
00:09:37,744 --> 00:09:39,546
And the Earp shotguns.
243
00:09:40,480 --> 00:09:43,616
And Wynonna
still hasn't come home.
244
00:09:44,751 --> 00:09:46,252
‐ They have to let us see her.
245
00:09:46,286 --> 00:09:49,556
‐ Wynonna said she last left
Nedley with Mercedes.
246
00:09:49,589 --> 00:09:52,258
What is the news on her?
‐ It's not good.
247
00:09:52,292 --> 00:09:54,227
There's a new demon bar
out on Horsehead Trail.
248
00:09:54,260 --> 00:09:56,763
‐ And, though given
the circumstances,
249
00:09:56,796 --> 00:09:58,531
it is but a trifle...
250
00:09:59,699 --> 00:10:01,801
is there word of my Charlene?
251
00:10:01,835 --> 00:10:03,803
♪ Tell your mama ♪
252
00:10:03,837 --> 00:10:05,405
♪ Tell your pa ♪
253
00:10:05,438 --> 00:10:08,842
♪ Tell your daddy
what you never saw ♪
254
00:10:08,875 --> 00:10:11,177
♪ You can run out ♪
255
00:10:11,544 --> 00:10:12,579
‐ Woo‐hoo!
256
00:10:12,612 --> 00:10:14,280
♪ Run out that door ♪
257
00:10:14,314 --> 00:10:16,282
(engine revving)
258
00:10:18,551 --> 00:10:20,553
(electronic music)
259
00:10:22,956 --> 00:10:25,492
‐ Vacation is over, assholes.
260
00:10:26,826 --> 00:10:30,230
It is time for a Holliday.
261
00:10:32,699 --> 00:10:34,467
‐ The club is members only.
262
00:10:35,335 --> 00:10:36,736
‐ Well, here are my dues.
263
00:10:39,172 --> 00:10:41,875
Salutations, Patrons of...
264
00:10:41,908 --> 00:10:44,144
The Glory Hole?
265
00:10:44,577 --> 00:10:47,247
Is that really the name
of this latrine?
266
00:10:47,280 --> 00:10:49,849
‐ "Why should I obtain by force
267
00:10:49,883 --> 00:10:53,553
that which I can obtain
by cheating?"
268
00:10:53,586 --> 00:10:56,389
John Henry Holliday,
269
00:10:56,422 --> 00:10:59,792
born 1851, Griffin, Georgia.
270
00:10:59,826 --> 00:11:01,194
Amon.
271
00:11:02,462 --> 00:11:04,631
I'm the proprietor
of this latrine.
272
00:11:04,664 --> 00:11:07,700
You sure you wouldn't rather
cheat than force your way in?
273
00:11:07,734 --> 00:11:09,602
‐ Bring me Ms. Gardner.
274
00:11:09,636 --> 00:11:12,672
Unless you fancy
kissing hardwood too.
275
00:11:12,705 --> 00:11:14,340
‐ Hmm, well...
276
00:11:14,374 --> 00:11:16,309
There were parts
of that scenario
277
00:11:16,342 --> 00:11:19,179
which I found enticing.
278
00:11:20,980 --> 00:11:23,750
‐ Big fan, Mr. H.
279
00:11:25,818 --> 00:11:27,587
‐ It's a demon bar.
280
00:11:28,454 --> 00:11:32,625
You think we're not thrilled
to welcome an undead legend?
281
00:11:34,961 --> 00:11:37,430
‐ Not the worst thing
I've been called.
282
00:11:37,463 --> 00:11:38,631
(chuckles)
283
00:11:38,665 --> 00:11:39,766
(electronic music)
284
00:11:39,799 --> 00:11:42,335
(Woman): Welcome
to my Glory Hole.
285
00:11:42,368 --> 00:11:44,437
(man cheering)
That's right, bonbons.
286
00:11:44,470 --> 00:11:46,773
It's time for your nicest vice,
287
00:11:46,806 --> 00:11:49,609
the mistress of the ruthless.
288
00:11:49,642 --> 00:11:51,744
(applause)
289
00:11:51,778 --> 00:11:52,912
Portia Control.
290
00:11:52,946 --> 00:11:55,615
♪ Do you want to go downtown ♪
291
00:11:55,648 --> 00:11:58,418
♪ See the city lights,
it's the red light district ♪
292
00:11:58,451 --> 00:12:01,654
♪ Do you want to go downtown ♪
293
00:12:01,688 --> 00:12:03,723
(women cheering)
294
00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:06,459
‐ If they think
they're gonna lock up my sister
295
00:12:06,492 --> 00:12:08,861
for the maybe murder
of my favorite Sheriff,
296
00:12:08,895 --> 00:12:10,763
present company excepted,
of course.
297
00:12:10,797 --> 00:12:12,232
‐ Present company
not the Sheriff.
298
00:12:12,265 --> 00:12:14,400
‐ Yeah, and what the hell's
that about?!
299
00:12:14,434 --> 00:12:16,336
‐ Yeah. You haven't met
the "they" yet.
300
00:12:16,369 --> 00:12:18,671
‐ Nicole. I am gonna go to town
301
00:12:18,705 --> 00:12:20,607
and I am gonna kick so much ass,
302
00:12:20,640 --> 00:12:22,308
I might go up a shoe size.
303
00:12:23,309 --> 00:12:25,411
‐ God, I've missed you,
Waverly Earp.
304
00:12:26,846 --> 00:12:28,881
‐ Though how do I,
an adult woman,
305
00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:30,950
own this many fuzzy garments?
306
00:12:30,984 --> 00:12:32,952
‐ It's only cause I organized it
by fabric.
307
00:12:32,986 --> 00:12:35,588
I did faux fur, flirty florals,
308
00:12:35,622 --> 00:12:37,390
feminine flannels...
309
00:12:38,524 --> 00:12:39,525
‐ You saved it all.
310
00:12:39,559 --> 00:12:41,828
(Rachel shouting in background)
So carefully.
311
00:12:41,861 --> 00:12:43,496
‐ Yeah, everything I could,
anyway.
312
00:12:43,529 --> 00:12:45,231
(Rachel): A little help here,
please!
313
00:12:45,265 --> 00:12:48,134
(knocking on window)
‐ Geez. Hey, Rachel!
314
00:12:48,167 --> 00:12:49,736
Not like that!
315
00:12:49,769 --> 00:12:53,406
Honestly, it's like this girl
has never milked a skunk before.
316
00:12:54,440 --> 00:12:57,176
‐ You're saying all these words
like they make sense.
317
00:12:57,210 --> 00:12:59,445
‐ I gotta go save her
from herself.
318
00:12:59,946 --> 00:13:02,482
Come back safe, okay? Again.
319
00:13:03,216 --> 00:13:04,884
And with Wynonna this time.
320
00:13:04,917 --> 00:13:06,653
(Rachel): I just need
your juice!
321
00:13:06,686 --> 00:13:09,188
(sighs)
‐ Okay.
322
00:13:12,558 --> 00:13:13,660
(Wynonna sighs)
323
00:13:13,693 --> 00:13:15,328
‐ What are you in for?
324
00:13:15,361 --> 00:13:17,263
‐ I splatowed
one of my customers.
325
00:13:17,297 --> 00:13:18,564
I thought she was a Medusa.
326
00:13:18,598 --> 00:13:21,668
‐ 'Cause of how high you were?
‐ No, because she was a Medusa.
327
00:13:24,437 --> 00:13:27,540
‐ If Purgatory's such
a hellhole now, why stay?
328
00:13:27,573 --> 00:13:30,476
‐ Wait... How'd you get around
the problem of the border?
329
00:13:31,444 --> 00:13:32,812
‐ What problem with the border?
330
00:13:32,845 --> 00:13:34,914
‐ Oh, did I not mention that?
331
00:13:34,947 --> 00:13:36,449
(Wynonna sighs)
Okay...
332
00:13:36,482 --> 00:13:38,351
After all the demons
moth‐to‐a‐flamed
333
00:13:38,384 --> 00:13:41,254
the Ghost River Triangle,
some government dickpickles
334
00:13:41,287 --> 00:13:43,489
set up, like,
a quarantine around the place.
335
00:13:43,523 --> 00:13:45,692
‐ Whoa, whoa, whoa,
so, people can't get out now?
336
00:13:45,725 --> 00:13:47,660
‐ Demons can't. Reg peeps can.
337
00:13:47,694 --> 00:13:49,128
‐ Good.
338
00:13:49,162 --> 00:13:50,630
‐ Wait. Not criminals!
339
00:13:50,663 --> 00:13:52,899
There's no way in Herojuana
they'll let you out.
340
00:13:52,932 --> 00:13:55,501
‐ This is a Russian doll
of suckage.
341
00:13:55,535 --> 00:13:58,504
Inside an arbitrary border,
there's a hellmouth,
342
00:13:58,538 --> 00:14:00,173
inside that is a demon
bush party,
343
00:14:00,206 --> 00:14:01,774
inside that is a jail,
344
00:14:01,808 --> 00:14:03,242
and inside that,
345
00:14:03,276 --> 00:14:05,244
I'm at the mercy
of a Dukes of Hazzard reject
346
00:14:05,278 --> 00:14:07,180
who wouldn't know justice
if it splatowed him
347
00:14:07,213 --> 00:14:09,349
in his butter sculpture face.
(knocking)
348
00:14:09,382 --> 00:14:11,451
‐ Ms. Earp? You have a visitor.
349
00:14:11,484 --> 00:14:12,785
‐ Good.
350
00:14:12,819 --> 00:14:14,587
Give me a heads up next time.
351
00:14:14,620 --> 00:14:15,788
‐ You were in the zone.
352
00:14:15,822 --> 00:14:17,790
‐ My client has the right
to a trial.
353
00:14:17,824 --> 00:14:19,525
‐ Your sister will get one.
354
00:14:19,559 --> 00:14:21,260
That's the whole reason
I brought her in,
355
00:14:21,294 --> 00:14:22,795
instead of letting the town
hang her.
356
00:14:23,596 --> 00:14:25,898
‐ I'm issuing a writ
of habeas corpus.
357
00:14:25,932 --> 00:14:26,966
‐ No!
358
00:14:26,999 --> 00:14:29,369
These dickpickles are gonna have
to show us a body.
359
00:14:29,402 --> 00:14:31,771
‐ That is literally
what habeas corpus means.
360
00:14:31,804 --> 00:14:33,806
‐ You two wanna let me know
when you're done slap‐fighting
361
00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:35,675
'cause I've got
a hell of a backlog.
362
00:14:35,708 --> 00:14:37,176
‐ Oh, you've got a backlog?
363
00:14:37,210 --> 00:14:39,412
Buddy, apparently I haven't
pooped in 18 months.
364
00:14:39,445 --> 00:14:41,381
I have a backlog.
365
00:14:42,248 --> 00:14:43,783
‐ Motion to strike that
from the record.
366
00:14:43,816 --> 00:14:45,284
‐ Motion denied.
367
00:14:45,318 --> 00:14:47,353
‐ Nice of you to join us,
Magistrate.
368
00:14:47,387 --> 00:14:49,722
‐ Mm‐hmm.
‐ Magistrate?
369
00:14:50,656 --> 00:14:52,892
‐ The family member here
would like to register
370
00:14:52,925 --> 00:14:54,660
a judicial complaint,
Your Honor.
371
00:14:54,694 --> 00:14:55,595
‐ Yeah, I don't do those.
372
00:14:55,628 --> 00:14:57,630
I just like the part
where I'm all judgy.
373
00:14:57,663 --> 00:14:59,732
‐ It's regarding the Earp case.
374
00:15:04,570 --> 00:15:05,638
‐ That's her?
375
00:15:06,739 --> 00:15:08,274
That?
376
00:15:08,307 --> 00:15:09,642
‐ That can hear you.
377
00:15:09,675 --> 00:15:12,145
‐ Um, we need to manage
this one carefully.
378
00:15:12,178 --> 00:15:14,414
There was an incident downtown,
and...
379
00:15:14,447 --> 00:15:16,682
people are watching.
‐ Ooh, fun.
380
00:15:16,716 --> 00:15:19,919
‐ Uh, can we not refer
to the attempted execution
381
00:15:19,952 --> 00:15:21,788
of my client as fun?
382
00:15:22,488 --> 00:15:24,657
‐ Can I speak to you
for a moment privately?
383
00:15:24,690 --> 00:15:26,426
In my office?
384
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:29,562
‐ Cute outfit.
385
00:15:31,464 --> 00:15:32,598
(door closing)
386
00:15:32,632 --> 00:15:34,901
(whispering): Is this our plan?
Is this our entire plan?
387
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,002
‐ No, of course not.
388
00:15:36,035 --> 00:15:38,538
Wynonna, we're gonna prove
you didn't kill Nedley.
389
00:15:38,571 --> 00:15:39,505
‐ Yeah.
‐ Yeah.
390
00:15:39,539 --> 00:15:41,107
Doc's all over it.
391
00:15:41,140 --> 00:15:43,776
(electronic music)
392
00:15:43,810 --> 00:15:46,746
♪ Do you wanna go downtown ♪
393
00:15:46,779 --> 00:15:49,482
(crowd cheering)
394
00:15:49,515 --> 00:15:51,384
‐ Behave, bunnies.
395
00:15:51,417 --> 00:15:53,219
Or don't.
396
00:15:56,622 --> 00:15:58,224
‐ What a dame.
397
00:15:58,257 --> 00:16:00,660
Do you want another
Brandy Alexander?
398
00:16:01,360 --> 00:16:03,763
I wish I could offer
you something different,
399
00:16:03,796 --> 00:16:07,400
but my supply trucks
keep getting eaten by the woods.
400
00:16:07,433 --> 00:16:12,405
And what with this county
technically dry these days...
401
00:16:15,775 --> 00:16:16,876
‐ Doc!
402
00:16:17,477 --> 00:16:19,912
What a relief it is
to see you.
403
00:16:19,946 --> 00:16:22,748
And a letdown to smell you.
404
00:16:23,916 --> 00:16:25,384
‐ Well, careful now.
405
00:16:25,418 --> 00:16:27,253
You will make
your bunnies jealous.
406
00:16:27,286 --> 00:16:29,222
‐ They just love
when I serve them up
407
00:16:29,255 --> 00:16:31,657
all that bloodsucker realness.
408
00:16:31,691 --> 00:16:34,594
‐ Who turned you? Was it Kate?
409
00:16:34,627 --> 00:16:37,363
‐ What? I'm not a vamp!
410
00:16:37,797 --> 00:16:39,098
Realness means faking it.
411
00:16:39,131 --> 00:16:40,867
God. Keep up!
412
00:16:40,900 --> 00:16:43,503
‐ Wait, so you are not
actually a demon?
413
00:16:43,536 --> 00:16:45,771
‐ I just let them think
that I am,
414
00:16:45,805 --> 00:16:47,573
because it's safer that way.
415
00:16:47,607 --> 00:16:50,343
What does that tell you
about what this town has become?
416
00:16:50,776 --> 00:16:52,578
Please tell me
everyone's okay, Doc.
417
00:16:52,612 --> 00:16:55,314
‐ Waverly is fine.
Wynonna is in jail.
418
00:16:55,348 --> 00:16:57,884
‐ Frick. I was worried
about that.
419
00:16:57,917 --> 00:16:59,652
‐ What really happened
to Nedley?
420
00:17:00,753 --> 00:17:02,788
‐ When Wynonna left him with me,
421
00:17:02,822 --> 00:17:04,457
I tried my best to Meredith Grey
422
00:17:04,490 --> 00:17:06,325
that magnificent old bitch
back to health.
423
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:08,628
But eventually,
he did a runner on me.
424
00:17:08,661 --> 00:17:09,662
‐ Why?
425
00:17:09,695 --> 00:17:12,498
‐ He was oozing. And he smelled.
426
00:17:12,532 --> 00:17:15,434
Like a teen boy's feet,
coated in blue cheese.
427
00:17:15,468 --> 00:17:16,836
Worse than you!
428
00:17:17,470 --> 00:17:19,238
‐ You paint quite
a picture, Portia.
429
00:17:19,272 --> 00:17:21,374
‐ I tried my best.
430
00:17:21,407 --> 00:17:23,276
But this place was getting real.
431
00:17:23,309 --> 00:17:25,645
And after a few days, he just...
432
00:17:25,678 --> 00:17:27,647
he took off into the woods.
433
00:17:28,347 --> 00:17:30,483
‐ Where the monsters are.
434
00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:35,555
You must come
and attest to that.
435
00:17:35,588 --> 00:17:37,723
‐ Doc, this isn't the world
that you all left.
436
00:17:37,757 --> 00:17:39,525
‐ We must produce Nedley,
437
00:17:39,559 --> 00:17:42,128
either alive or dead,
we must find him.
438
00:17:43,329 --> 00:17:46,098
‐ I can tell you where
the people‐eater is,
439
00:17:46,132 --> 00:17:47,500
it's out at Grizzly Flats.
440
00:17:47,533 --> 00:17:49,602
Maybe you'll find something
to show them.
441
00:17:49,635 --> 00:17:51,637
Doc, they say it's claws
are like if Wolverine
442
00:17:51,671 --> 00:17:53,339
impregnated a chainsaw.
443
00:17:54,507 --> 00:17:56,409
‐ Thank you, Mercedes.
444
00:18:02,248 --> 00:18:04,216
‐ Oh!
(laughing)
445
00:18:04,250 --> 00:18:05,284
‐ Can we try a jailbreak?
446
00:18:05,318 --> 00:18:07,386
‐ No! They've got a lot
of guys working for them,
447
00:18:07,420 --> 00:18:08,854
whatever they are.
‐ Yeah.
448
00:18:08,888 --> 00:18:10,389
What if they're all demons?
‐ Exactly,
449
00:18:10,423 --> 00:18:12,391
and I don't have my...
(distant laughing)
450
00:18:12,425 --> 00:18:14,527
...shiny thing that makes
with the peace.
451
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:16,162
‐ Shit.
‐ Ahem!
452
00:18:16,195 --> 00:18:18,397
I have an announcement to make!
453
00:18:19,298 --> 00:18:20,633
So!
454
00:18:20,666 --> 00:18:22,201
(clearing throat)
455
00:18:22,234 --> 00:18:25,404
(megaphone feedback)
You think that our jails
456
00:18:25,438 --> 00:18:28,174
are too crowded,
and our courts are too slow?
457
00:18:28,207 --> 00:18:30,643
Think there's nothing to do
in this lame‐ass town?
458
00:18:30,676 --> 00:18:33,479
Think we need a little bit
more junk in our trunks?
459
00:18:33,512 --> 00:18:35,781
‐ Is she asking me?
‐ And as always,
460
00:18:35,815 --> 00:18:37,483
we aim to please,
461
00:18:37,516 --> 00:18:39,518
and we're here to fix
any problem
462
00:18:39,552 --> 00:18:42,254
you guys think
you might have. So...
463
00:18:42,288 --> 00:18:45,458
lock up your daughters,
and lube up your saucepans!
464
00:18:45,491 --> 00:18:49,362
All of our jailbirds
will be competing for one,
465
00:18:49,395 --> 00:18:52,231
yes, one,
get‐out‐of‐jail‐free card.
466
00:18:52,264 --> 00:18:53,833
In the first ever...
‐ What?
467
00:18:53,866 --> 00:18:57,236
‐ ...Randy Nedley Memorial
Chili Cook‐off
468
00:18:57,269 --> 00:18:59,705
For Freedom! Yay!
469
00:19:01,340 --> 00:19:04,844
‐ Is... Is this real life?
470
00:19:04,877 --> 00:19:07,613
‐ Might be for you.
But I'm dead.
471
00:19:18,157 --> 00:19:21,160
‐ Hope you're ready to stumble!
472
00:19:21,193 --> 00:19:24,096
'Cause this tummy
is starting to grumble!
473
00:19:24,130 --> 00:19:25,598
(Woman): Woo!
(chuckling)
474
00:19:25,631 --> 00:19:28,968
‐ She is Grade A,
USDA certifiable.
475
00:19:29,001 --> 00:19:30,269
‐ Hey, just be glad
you weren't here
476
00:19:30,302 --> 00:19:33,673
for the Tops‐Off‐Dance‐Off
For Freedom!
477
00:19:33,706 --> 00:19:35,141
Every month or so,
478
00:19:35,174 --> 00:19:37,410
the Magistrate manages
to out‐whackadoo herself.
479
00:19:37,443 --> 00:19:39,211
‐ I don't get it.
What's her endgame?
480
00:19:39,245 --> 00:19:42,148
‐ Ugh, classic bread
and circuses, brah.
481
00:19:42,181 --> 00:19:44,283
Keep the populace fed
and entertained,
482
00:19:44,316 --> 00:19:46,519
and you can get away
with all kinds of devilry.
483
00:19:46,552 --> 00:19:49,121
‐ Yup. Okay, your trash talk
is a little all over the place.
484
00:19:49,155 --> 00:19:51,357
‐ Hey, they set people free
after these contests.
485
00:19:51,390 --> 00:19:52,458
I've seen it.
486
00:19:52,491 --> 00:19:55,361
What if this is the only chance
for us to get out?
487
00:19:56,729 --> 00:19:58,497
‐ Wynonna!
488
00:19:58,531 --> 00:19:59,465
Hi.
489
00:20:00,399 --> 00:20:01,534
‐ Haught.
490
00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:06,172
‐ Thanks for getting her home.
491
00:20:06,205 --> 00:20:08,240
‐ I only did it for me.
492
00:20:08,274 --> 00:20:10,509
‐ Like everything
you've ever done.
493
00:20:11,444 --> 00:20:13,179
‐ It's been a while.
494
00:20:14,447 --> 00:20:16,282
A long while, apparently.
495
00:20:16,716 --> 00:20:18,484
How you holding up?
‐ Peachy.
496
00:20:18,517 --> 00:20:21,120
‐ Hey. I brought a few things
from home.
497
00:20:21,153 --> 00:20:22,521
Is that against the rules?
498
00:20:22,555 --> 00:20:23,556
‐ Uh, I feel like the only rule
499
00:20:23,589 --> 00:20:25,958
is don't tell the Empress
she's got no clothes.
500
00:20:26,258 --> 00:20:28,461
‐ Well she's def
got no panties.
501
00:20:29,095 --> 00:20:31,764
What? She jumped up on a desk.
I couldn't help it.
502
00:20:31,797 --> 00:20:34,100
‐ Is she waxed?
(airhorn blaring)
503
00:20:34,133 --> 00:20:35,534
Fudge!
‐ And that's the first toot
504
00:20:35,568 --> 00:20:38,938
of the Randy Nedley Memorial
Chili Cook‐off For Freedom!
505
00:20:38,971 --> 00:20:41,006
With a lot more toots to follow.
506
00:20:41,040 --> 00:20:42,975
Now get cooking, left‐swipes!
507
00:20:43,375 --> 00:20:46,078
Cook!
‐ Do I put the cheese in first?
508
00:20:46,112 --> 00:20:48,147
Probably, right?
‐ Oh!
509
00:20:49,048 --> 00:20:50,082
‐ Okay.
‐ Okay.
510
00:20:50,116 --> 00:20:51,083
‐ Yup.
‐ Yup.
511
00:20:51,117 --> 00:20:52,585
We're on it. We're on it.
512
00:20:54,653 --> 00:20:57,423
(eerie music)
513
00:21:26,786 --> 00:21:29,021
‐ Ohh...
514
00:21:29,421 --> 00:21:32,391
Oh, sweet honey‐lamb.
515
00:21:38,798 --> 00:21:40,966
(monster growling)
516
00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:46,405
(tense music)
517
00:21:50,376 --> 00:21:52,444
Come closer, now.
518
00:21:52,478 --> 00:21:55,347
It is time we met.
519
00:21:55,381 --> 00:21:56,549
(growling)
520
00:21:56,582 --> 00:21:58,984
(country music)
521
00:21:59,985 --> 00:22:01,987
‐ Woo! You want a t‐shirt?!
522
00:22:02,021 --> 00:22:03,022
You want a t‐shirt?
523
00:22:03,055 --> 00:22:05,357
And you get a t‐shirt! Oh!
524
00:22:05,391 --> 00:22:06,625
In the nads!
525
00:22:06,659 --> 00:22:09,028
Now they're also XXL!
526
00:22:09,061 --> 00:22:10,229
‐ Probably better
not to be Sheriff
527
00:22:10,262 --> 00:22:11,697
while she's got her hands
on that thing.
528
00:22:11,730 --> 00:22:13,365
Imagine the lawsuits?
529
00:22:13,399 --> 00:22:16,101
I never imagined
you giving up the star,
530
00:22:16,135 --> 00:22:17,970
power‐hungry fiend that you are.
531
00:22:18,003 --> 00:22:19,738
‐ I didn't give up.
Cleo showed up,
532
00:22:19,772 --> 00:22:21,640
reincorporated the town,
made herself magistrate,
533
00:22:21,674 --> 00:22:24,443
and elected her own Sheriff.
‐ So nobody stopped her?
534
00:22:24,476 --> 00:22:27,513
‐ Who had time for politics?
I had Rachel, and the homestead,
535
00:22:27,546 --> 00:22:29,181
and people to look for.
536
00:22:29,615 --> 00:22:31,183
And I did look. Hard.
537
00:22:31,217 --> 00:22:32,518
‐ Where'd you look?
Up Bunny Loblaw's‐‐
538
00:22:32,551 --> 00:22:34,253
‐ Don't come at me about it,
okay, Wynonna?
539
00:22:34,286 --> 00:22:36,522
I know I let everybody down.
540
00:22:36,555 --> 00:22:38,123
‐ Nicole, I would never say‐‐
541
00:22:38,157 --> 00:22:40,459
‐ Are you two chatting?
I need those onions, stat!
542
00:22:40,492 --> 00:22:42,261
‐ Yes, chef! Coming.
543
00:22:42,294 --> 00:22:44,930
‐ Okay. Now,
for the pressed seitan.
544
00:22:44,964 --> 00:22:47,366
what?! Who's President Satan?
545
00:22:47,399 --> 00:22:50,169
‐ No. Seitan.
As in vital wheat gluten.
546
00:22:50,202 --> 00:22:51,637
It's the secret
to a hearty vegan chili.
547
00:22:51,670 --> 00:22:53,339
‐ We're making vegan chili?!
548
00:22:53,372 --> 00:22:55,007
‐ Baby, how's she supposed
to win anything
549
00:22:55,040 --> 00:22:56,475
with vegan chili?!
550
00:22:57,009 --> 00:22:58,510
(gasps)
551
00:22:58,544 --> 00:23:01,180
‐ Not today, Satan!
552
00:23:01,647 --> 00:23:02,681
‐ Afternoon, Ms. Haught.
553
00:23:02,715 --> 00:23:04,383
‐ Sheriff Clayborn.
554
00:23:05,017 --> 00:23:06,352
‐ Makes a change to see you
back in town.
555
00:23:06,385 --> 00:23:09,088
I hope that means
there's no hard feelings.
556
00:23:09,488 --> 00:23:11,290
About the election.
557
00:23:11,323 --> 00:23:13,359
‐ I didn't have as much time
to campaign.
558
00:23:13,392 --> 00:23:15,461
Or your other
rumored advantages.
559
00:23:16,028 --> 00:23:18,130
‐ Nice you can afford
a break now, though.
560
00:23:18,530 --> 00:23:19,965
I mean, that is,
561
00:23:19,999 --> 00:23:21,700
if you feel the homestead
is safe with a...
562
00:23:21,734 --> 00:23:23,569
teenage girl on the case.
563
00:23:25,004 --> 00:23:27,139
Good luck with the chili.
564
00:23:34,513 --> 00:23:36,515
‐ Aw, you have your little
worry wrinkle.
565
00:23:36,548 --> 00:23:39,218
‐ There are things, Waverly.
Every night, in those traps.
566
00:23:39,251 --> 00:23:41,520
The monster really wants inside.
567
00:23:41,553 --> 00:23:43,255
‐ You're worried about Rachel.
568
00:23:44,423 --> 00:23:46,058
Why don't you go home?
569
00:23:46,091 --> 00:23:47,526
‐ You sure you don't mind?
570
00:23:47,559 --> 00:23:49,094
‐ No.
571
00:23:57,503 --> 00:23:59,672
‐ I'll give you 20 bucks
for half your bacon.
572
00:23:59,705 --> 00:24:02,107
‐ You don't have 20 bucks.
573
00:24:02,608 --> 00:24:04,376
Wynonna!
574
00:24:06,412 --> 00:24:07,947
(ominous music)
575
00:24:07,980 --> 00:24:09,949
‐ For Randy Nedley.
576
00:24:09,982 --> 00:24:13,118
(gunshots, monster growling)
577
00:24:24,596 --> 00:24:27,099
(growling)
578
00:24:28,667 --> 00:24:30,502
‐ Rachel?!
579
00:24:30,536 --> 00:24:33,639
Valdez?!
‐ Nicole! I'm okay!
580
00:24:33,672 --> 00:24:35,507
‐ Okay. You're okay?
581
00:24:35,541 --> 00:24:37,509
‐ Don't make it more painful
by mommying me.
582
00:24:37,543 --> 00:24:38,911
‐ What happened?
583
00:24:38,944 --> 00:24:40,479
‐ I'm out re‐baiting trap seven,
by the poplars,
584
00:24:40,512 --> 00:24:43,582
and you scared away the skunks
earlier, so I used kombucha.
585
00:24:43,615 --> 00:24:45,284
What? It kills
all kinds of things,
586
00:24:45,317 --> 00:24:47,586
you know, like intestinal
parasites, and...
587
00:24:47,619 --> 00:24:49,054
Ow, ow!
588
00:24:49,088 --> 00:24:50,522
So I'm filling up the trap,
589
00:24:50,556 --> 00:24:53,125
and it runs in,
you know, the big, crusty one.
590
00:24:53,158 --> 00:24:55,661
But then, you know
that old‐timey cowboy dude?
591
00:24:55,694 --> 00:24:56,996
Daddy Blue Eyes?
592
00:24:57,029 --> 00:24:58,330
‐ Doc.
‐ Yeah!
593
00:24:58,364 --> 00:25:00,099
He's on the hill,
and he's yelling at it
594
00:25:00,132 --> 00:25:01,400
to come get him instead.
595
00:25:01,433 --> 00:25:03,902
‐ Did he kill it?
‐ No, but he shot it.
596
00:25:03,969 --> 00:25:06,138
‐ Okay. You are coming inside.
597
00:25:06,171 --> 00:25:08,173
And that is my mommy voice.
598
00:25:08,207 --> 00:25:10,309
(indistinct chattering)
599
00:25:10,976 --> 00:25:12,344
‐ Oh, my God. It's edible.
Try it!
600
00:25:12,378 --> 00:25:14,213
‐ You threw stolen beef
and a can of anchovies
601
00:25:14,246 --> 00:25:16,315
into my vegan masterpiece!
602
00:25:16,348 --> 00:25:17,483
Ahh!
603
00:25:17,516 --> 00:25:18,584
‐ Damn.
604
00:25:18,617 --> 00:25:21,053
‐ I'm gonna shove that thing
up her canned anchovies.
605
00:25:21,086 --> 00:25:23,722
‐ Criminal, take it.
606
00:25:23,756 --> 00:25:25,391
And this.
607
00:25:26,191 --> 00:25:28,060
Criminal chiliheads!
608
00:25:28,093 --> 00:25:31,330
As you all know,
I excel at having opinions.
609
00:25:31,363 --> 00:25:33,465
And I was going to decide
today's winner
610
00:25:33,499 --> 00:25:34,967
all by my lonesome,
611
00:25:34,967 --> 00:25:36,301
but a little voice in my head
was like,
612
00:25:36,335 --> 00:25:38,637
don't be such a greedy
skank's toilet, Cleo!
613
00:25:38,670 --> 00:25:39,905
‐ Cleo?
‐ Toilet?
614
00:25:39,938 --> 00:25:42,674
‐ So I asked the second...
615
00:25:42,708 --> 00:25:45,044
prettiest girl in all
of Purgatory
616
00:25:45,077 --> 00:25:46,178
to come help me out.
617
00:25:46,211 --> 00:25:49,548
So slap your bits together
for your Miss Kidney Bean:
618
00:25:49,581 --> 00:25:51,417
Chrissy Nedley!
619
00:25:51,450 --> 00:25:53,218
(crowd cheers and applauds)
620
00:25:56,455 --> 00:25:59,091
(tense music)
621
00:25:59,458 --> 00:26:02,094
‐ Oh... You weren't kidding.
622
00:26:02,127 --> 00:26:05,097
She really does think
you killed her dad.
623
00:26:05,130 --> 00:26:07,266
Yeah, I don't think
you're gonna win.
624
00:26:07,666 --> 00:26:10,369
‐ I'm gonna turn out the lights
in case it's attracted to them.
625
00:26:11,470 --> 00:26:13,672
(monster roaring)
626
00:26:13,705 --> 00:26:15,441
‐ It's here.
627
00:26:15,474 --> 00:26:18,177
(stomping)
628
00:26:18,210 --> 00:26:20,979
(Doc): Nicole! Let me in!
Let me in!
629
00:26:21,013 --> 00:26:23,282
(Rachel): It's Dr. Mustache,
we have to save him!
630
00:26:23,715 --> 00:26:25,584
(Doc): I'm going out front!
631
00:26:26,618 --> 00:26:28,487
‐ It's gonna break the glass!
632
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:29,588
(Doc): Open up!
633
00:26:29,621 --> 00:26:31,490
‐ Nicole, you have
to let him in!
634
00:26:31,523 --> 00:26:33,158
(stomping)
Nicole!
635
00:26:33,192 --> 00:26:35,160
(monster roaring)
Nicole!
636
00:26:40,399 --> 00:26:42,534
‐ Wake up!
637
00:26:42,568 --> 00:26:45,204
(monster roaring)
(Doc): Please!
638
00:26:47,172 --> 00:26:48,874
That felt like it took forever.
639
00:26:48,907 --> 00:26:51,110
‐ Yeah, I bet.
‐ Move!
640
00:26:52,478 --> 00:26:55,247
(intense music)
641
00:26:57,549 --> 00:27:00,352
(gunshot, monster roaring)
642
00:27:00,385 --> 00:27:03,322
‐ You carried a bottle
the whole time you were running?
643
00:27:03,355 --> 00:27:05,357
You are goals.
‐ No, he is not goals,
644
00:27:05,390 --> 00:27:08,060
he needs water.
‐ Or maybe he needs...
645
00:27:08,093 --> 00:27:10,095
(both): Don't say kombucha.
646
00:27:10,129 --> 00:27:11,597
‐ Thanks for distracting
the crusty booger beast.
647
00:27:11,630 --> 00:27:14,066
Right, Haught?
‐ Yeah. Thanks, Doc.
648
00:27:14,099 --> 00:27:15,968
‐ Do not let me set here
for more than ten minutes.
649
00:27:16,001 --> 00:27:18,036
I am fixing to return
to the woods.
650
00:27:18,070 --> 00:27:19,404
‐ For what?
‐ To complete the job.
651
00:27:19,438 --> 00:27:22,241
That is a host animal.
‐ For the little puffballs!
652
00:27:22,274 --> 00:27:24,143
I saw it leaking
from the wound.
653
00:27:24,176 --> 00:27:26,612
‐ I believe it has slowed
a little.
654
00:27:26,645 --> 00:27:28,547
‐ Then it's time we strike back.
655
00:27:29,948 --> 00:27:32,217
‐ It might be okay.
(airhorn blaring)
656
00:27:32,251 --> 00:27:33,986
‐ I'll never get used to that.
‐ So...
657
00:27:34,019 --> 00:27:36,188
Clearly some of you
didn't want it bad enough.
658
00:27:36,221 --> 00:27:37,956
Seriously, four of those chilis
659
00:27:37,990 --> 00:27:39,458
was just hot diarrhea
with beans.
660
00:27:39,491 --> 00:27:40,893
‐ Certainly mine.
‐ Ew.
661
00:27:40,926 --> 00:27:43,162
‐ So, thank you for attending
662
00:27:43,195 --> 00:27:45,998
the first Randy Nedley
Memorial Chili Cook‐off.
663
00:27:46,031 --> 00:27:48,033
‐ If you leave off
the "For Freedom", so help me,
664
00:27:48,066 --> 00:27:49,968
I will treat you to an actual
bowl of hot diarrhea.
665
00:27:50,002 --> 00:27:51,203
‐ For Freedom!
666
00:27:51,236 --> 00:27:54,373
My father had a complicated
relationship with this cook‐off.
667
00:27:54,406 --> 00:27:56,575
If he were here today,
he would say‐‐
668
00:27:56,608 --> 00:27:59,144
‐ God, no one cares, Pissy,
who won?!
669
00:28:00,145 --> 00:28:02,447
And today's winner
of our get out‐of‐jail‐free card
670
00:28:02,481 --> 00:28:03,615
goes to...
671
00:28:03,649 --> 00:28:05,317
‐ Please, please,
please, please.
672
00:28:05,350 --> 00:28:07,486
‐ Wynonna Earp!
673
00:28:07,519 --> 00:28:09,955
‐ What?
(crowd whistling)
674
00:28:11,490 --> 00:28:13,458
(squealing)
675
00:28:15,060 --> 00:28:18,463
‐ Winner, winner,
chili dinner! I win!
676
00:28:18,497 --> 00:28:20,966
‐ Glad it was you, Cell‐y!
‐ Listen, you can have the rest
677
00:28:20,999 --> 00:28:22,935
of my chili if you want.
‐ Ah, I'm good.
678
00:28:23,969 --> 00:28:25,537
‐ What?
679
00:28:25,571 --> 00:28:27,005
‐ Ah...
680
00:28:28,106 --> 00:28:30,375
‐ No way, right?
‐ Okay!
681
00:28:30,409 --> 00:28:31,510
Bye!
682
00:28:32,144 --> 00:28:35,247
Pound it. No? No?
(Waverly gags)
683
00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:38,217
‐ It tastes
like peppermint butt.
684
00:28:38,250 --> 00:28:39,585
‐ Hey, hey!
‐ So why?
685
00:28:39,618 --> 00:28:42,120
‐ Unhand your Chili Queen!
686
00:28:43,655 --> 00:28:45,490
‐ That's why.
687
00:28:46,959 --> 00:28:49,261
‐ Where are those keys?
688
00:28:49,661 --> 00:28:51,163
‐ To my new car?
689
00:28:51,196 --> 00:28:53,532
Wow, this contest
has everything!
690
00:28:53,565 --> 00:28:56,134
‐ Holt, or Sheriff Clayborn,
691
00:28:56,168 --> 00:28:58,103
doesn't like it when I drive
department vehicles,
692
00:28:58,136 --> 00:29:00,239
but he can have
a big old gag of my gavel.
693
00:29:00,272 --> 00:29:02,708
‐ Did you forget
the "freedom" part?
694
00:29:02,741 --> 00:29:04,376
‐ Yeah, not 'til you get
to the border.
695
00:29:04,409 --> 00:29:06,345
‐ I'm not leaving town.
‐ Don't worry,
696
00:29:06,378 --> 00:29:07,212
I can get you out.
697
00:29:07,246 --> 00:29:08,714
I know people.
‐ No, I mean, I won't.
698
00:29:08,747 --> 00:29:10,382
‐ Do you know how many
Purgatorians
699
00:29:10,415 --> 00:29:12,517
would have murdered
for this prize?
700
00:29:12,551 --> 00:29:14,453
(gasps)
Oh, weird...
701
00:29:14,486 --> 00:29:17,055
I just realized that that's
exactly what you did!
702
00:29:19,358 --> 00:29:21,526
‐ You acted like you knew
who I was.
703
00:29:21,560 --> 00:29:23,195
When we first met.
704
00:29:23,228 --> 00:29:25,063
But you're not a Revenant.
705
00:29:25,697 --> 00:29:28,567
And if you were really powerful,
you'd just kill me.
706
00:29:31,637 --> 00:29:33,238
(gasps)
‐ Yay!
707
00:29:34,039 --> 00:29:35,173
Keys!
708
00:29:35,207 --> 00:29:36,541
‐ I wish I knew
what we were up against,
709
00:29:36,575 --> 00:29:38,744
so we could prep a silver
bullet or a wooden stake.
710
00:29:38,777 --> 00:29:40,912
Sorry, Doc.
‐ Understood.
711
00:29:40,946 --> 00:29:42,681
‐ Okay, don't yell at me,
but...
712
00:29:42,714 --> 00:29:45,117
the creature did make
a Chewbacca howl
713
00:29:45,150 --> 00:29:46,351
when it stepped in the puddle
of kombucha.
714
00:29:46,385 --> 00:29:48,553
‐ For the last time,
home brewed mold juice
715
00:29:48,587 --> 00:29:50,255
will not defeat pure evil.
716
00:29:50,289 --> 00:29:51,356
‐ It smelled like pure evil.
717
00:29:51,390 --> 00:29:54,626
When it was leaking?
Like blue cheese and boy feet.
718
00:29:54,660 --> 00:29:57,062
‐ Did you hear someone say that?
719
00:29:57,095 --> 00:29:59,398
‐ It dealt it.
I simply smelt it.
720
00:29:59,431 --> 00:30:02,401
‐ Look, I am not suggesting
we refrain from hunting it...
721
00:30:02,434 --> 00:30:03,635
‐ Like hell I would.
722
00:30:03,669 --> 00:30:05,971
‐ ...but I looked into its eyes
and I'm remain unconvinced
723
00:30:06,004 --> 00:30:07,239
it is our enemy.
724
00:30:07,272 --> 00:30:09,241
‐ This thing wants to take
Waverly's home,
725
00:30:09,274 --> 00:30:11,543
and our ability
to think of anything else.
726
00:30:12,210 --> 00:30:13,945
I found this in the trap,
727
00:30:13,979 --> 00:30:15,414
Last year when you guys were...
728
00:30:15,447 --> 00:30:17,249
‐ Gone for too long.
729
00:30:18,016 --> 00:30:19,551
‐ At first I thought
it was irrelevant,
730
00:30:19,584 --> 00:30:21,486
but then I figured it out.
731
00:30:21,520 --> 00:30:23,121
It's a Hawaiian shirt, Doc.
732
00:30:23,155 --> 00:30:25,557
It's... It's Nedley's shirt.
733
00:30:27,025 --> 00:30:28,527
That thing killed him,
734
00:30:28,560 --> 00:30:30,562
and now we need to kill it.
735
00:30:31,296 --> 00:30:33,332
‐ The ballpuffers are parasites,
736
00:30:33,365 --> 00:30:35,600
and they took over something.
737
00:30:35,634 --> 00:30:37,536
Someone.
738
00:30:38,303 --> 00:30:41,606
Someone that always comes back
to you, Nicole.
739
00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:42,974
‐ No.
740
00:30:43,008 --> 00:30:45,410
‐ What if the ogre
didn't eat Nedley?
741
00:30:45,444 --> 00:30:48,046
What if the ogre...
‐ ...is Nedley?
742
00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:50,048
(tense music)
743
00:30:52,150 --> 00:30:54,019
‐ People will find out...
744
00:30:54,052 --> 00:30:57,222
about the contest, about you
not keeping your word.
745
00:30:57,255 --> 00:30:59,958
‐ One, how are they gonna
find out?
746
00:31:00,459 --> 00:31:03,995
And two, what does an Earp know
about keeping their word, huh?
747
00:31:04,029 --> 00:31:05,964
That is priceless.
748
00:31:05,997 --> 00:31:07,399
You are hilare.
749
00:31:07,432 --> 00:31:09,067
‐ So this is personal.
750
00:31:11,036 --> 00:31:13,538
(grunting)
751
00:31:15,073 --> 00:31:17,008
(Wynonna groaning)
752
00:31:18,210 --> 00:31:19,511
‐ No.
753
00:31:19,544 --> 00:31:21,012
See this...
754
00:31:21,046 --> 00:31:25,016
This is hereditary,
daughter of Earps.
755
00:31:25,584 --> 00:31:27,619
(Cleo laughing)
756
00:31:27,652 --> 00:31:29,955
Besides, we have to keep
757
00:31:29,988 --> 00:31:32,124
feeding something
to this monster,
758
00:31:32,157 --> 00:31:34,726
whatever it is,
to keep it out of town.
759
00:31:34,760 --> 00:31:36,495
See, Sheriff Holt and I?
760
00:31:36,528 --> 00:31:38,530
We know what it takes
761
00:31:38,563 --> 00:31:41,066
to get dirty jobs done.
762
00:31:41,400 --> 00:31:43,502
And if that dirty job...
763
00:31:45,370 --> 00:31:47,406
happens to be you?
764
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:50,108
Bonus.
765
00:31:50,509 --> 00:31:52,577
Now scream.
‐ Argh!
766
00:31:53,645 --> 00:31:55,580
(quietly): Eat my vegan seitan.
767
00:31:55,614 --> 00:31:57,983
(sighs)
‐ See, they lied.
768
00:31:58,016 --> 00:31:59,418
You're not even fun.
769
00:32:00,452 --> 00:32:02,487
(screaming)
770
00:32:03,989 --> 00:32:05,690
Beastie boy!
771
00:32:05,724 --> 00:32:08,093
Come and get it!
772
00:32:11,430 --> 00:32:12,564
‐ Where are you going?
773
00:32:12,597 --> 00:32:14,633
‐ Oh, to sit in my car.
774
00:32:14,666 --> 00:32:16,301
Take a few pics!
775
00:32:16,334 --> 00:32:19,538
Maybe buff my muff,
if the mood strikes.
776
00:32:19,571 --> 00:32:21,339
‐ You are so weird.
777
00:32:24,209 --> 00:32:25,510
‐ Previews are over.
778
00:32:25,544 --> 00:32:27,412
Looks like the creature feature
is starting.
779
00:32:27,446 --> 00:32:29,448
‐ Get away from her,
skank toilet!
780
00:32:29,481 --> 00:32:30,515
‐ Ahh!
781
00:32:30,549 --> 00:32:32,417
‐ For the record, I don't
believe in skank shaming,
782
00:32:32,451 --> 00:32:33,618
but you said it first.
783
00:32:36,154 --> 00:32:38,056
Sis, you okay?
784
00:32:38,089 --> 00:32:39,591
‐ We need a knife or scissors.
785
00:32:39,624 --> 00:32:41,560
‐ I have... teeth?
786
00:32:42,160 --> 00:32:44,262
‐ Ugh! She's got a weapon!
787
00:32:45,063 --> 00:32:46,898
‐ Friggin' skanks always do.
788
00:32:46,932 --> 00:32:48,467
Wait, I gotta stop saying that.
789
00:32:48,500 --> 00:32:50,368
Okay, stay there!
790
00:32:55,507 --> 00:32:57,943
No, no, no!
791
00:32:57,976 --> 00:32:59,344
(Cleo screaming)
792
00:32:59,978 --> 00:33:01,313
(growling)
793
00:33:01,346 --> 00:33:04,216
(whimpering)
794
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:10,422
(grunting)
795
00:33:10,455 --> 00:33:11,556
(growling)
796
00:33:11,590 --> 00:33:13,124
‐ Waverly!
797
00:33:15,260 --> 00:33:16,561
Waverly!
798
00:33:17,662 --> 00:33:19,464
‐ Hold your fire!
‐ It's Nedley!
799
00:33:22,300 --> 00:33:23,668
Doc, flank him on the back!
800
00:33:23,702 --> 00:33:26,204
Waverly, find your position!
801
00:33:27,539 --> 00:33:30,442
(tense music)
802
00:33:33,144 --> 00:33:35,180
(engine starting)
803
00:33:36,281 --> 00:33:38,216
(growling)
804
00:33:42,687 --> 00:33:46,491
(soft, joyful music)
805
00:33:54,332 --> 00:33:59,204
♪ I used to take
on the world on my own ♪
806
00:33:59,237 --> 00:34:03,074
♪ Thought I was so strong ♪
807
00:34:06,645 --> 00:34:08,980
♪ As long as I'm here ♪
808
00:34:09,014 --> 00:34:11,283
♪ By your side ♪
809
00:34:11,316 --> 00:34:14,486
♪ Ten times as strong together ♪
810
00:34:14,519 --> 00:34:18,056
♪ We're amplified ♪
811
00:34:21,393 --> 00:34:22,961
‐ Idiots.
812
00:34:22,994 --> 00:34:24,462
(laughing)
813
00:34:24,496 --> 00:34:26,264
(growling)
814
00:34:28,567 --> 00:34:32,103
♪ And I'm here by your side ♪
815
00:34:37,042 --> 00:34:38,376
(laughing)
816
00:34:38,410 --> 00:34:39,578
‐ Wynonna?
817
00:34:40,412 --> 00:34:41,580
What did I do?
818
00:34:41,613 --> 00:34:43,915
‐ You survived, Nedley.
819
00:34:43,949 --> 00:34:45,050
That's what you did.
820
00:34:45,083 --> 00:34:46,985
You made it home.
821
00:34:49,387 --> 00:34:50,455
‐ Fuck yeah.
822
00:34:58,296 --> 00:35:01,600
‐ Nedley, I'm not coming
any closer
823
00:35:01,633 --> 00:35:03,101
until you put this on.
824
00:35:04,336 --> 00:35:06,137
There's been enough crime today.
825
00:35:06,171 --> 00:35:08,006
(breathing heavily)
826
00:35:08,039 --> 00:35:09,507
‐ Hey.
827
00:35:12,110 --> 00:35:14,579
‐ Nicole, what's going on?
‐ I...
828
00:35:14,613 --> 00:35:17,415
‐ You were not in possession
of your own faculties.
829
00:35:19,985 --> 00:35:21,553
‐ Why do I taste skunk?
830
00:35:21,586 --> 00:35:23,254
‐ That may be me.
831
00:35:24,623 --> 00:35:27,092
‐ That's some intense, brother.
832
00:35:31,396 --> 00:35:33,465
(soft music)
833
00:35:43,441 --> 00:35:44,509
‐ Dad.
‐ Chrissy!
834
00:35:44,542 --> 00:35:46,444
‐ Oh, my God. Dad!
835
00:35:47,212 --> 00:35:50,415
(crying)
‐ Shh, shh.
836
00:35:54,219 --> 00:35:56,221
‐ They told me you were dead.
837
00:35:56,955 --> 00:36:00,291
‐ This stubborn mule? Not yet.
838
00:36:01,559 --> 00:36:04,262
‐ Where were you? What happened?
839
00:36:04,295 --> 00:36:05,463
‐ I really don't remember.
840
00:36:05,497 --> 00:36:08,700
‐ Ah, might be for the best.
‐ Might be?
841
00:36:08,733 --> 00:36:11,136
‐ Look, um, we think
he'll be fine.
842
00:36:11,169 --> 00:36:14,105
But just for fun, maybe keep him
away from small game.
843
00:36:17,242 --> 00:36:19,477
‐ Wynonna. I don't even
know what to say.
844
00:36:19,511 --> 00:36:20,645
(Wynonna): I know.
845
00:36:21,346 --> 00:36:23,448
‐ It's just,
since the evacuation, I...
846
00:36:23,481 --> 00:36:26,351
this place...
it got to me and I...
847
00:36:26,384 --> 00:36:28,620
‐ Needed us and got hurt
when we weren't here?
848
00:36:30,655 --> 00:36:33,258
‐ Yeah.
‐ It won't happen again.
849
00:36:36,327 --> 00:36:37,595
Hey, you.
850
00:36:41,499 --> 00:36:43,368
It's good to have you back.
851
00:36:53,411 --> 00:36:54,546
‐ Nicole.
852
00:36:56,047 --> 00:36:57,449
‐ You should get Chrissy
out of here.
853
00:36:57,482 --> 00:36:59,184
While you still can.
854
00:37:10,428 --> 00:37:12,497
‐ You did the chili cook‐off
without me?
855
00:37:12,530 --> 00:37:15,200
(laughing)
‐ Dad...
856
00:37:15,700 --> 00:37:18,303
(electronic music)
857
00:37:20,638 --> 00:37:24,175
‐ Here I thought all my flirting
was getting me nowhere.
858
00:37:24,976 --> 00:37:27,011
‐ There is more
where that came from.
859
00:37:27,045 --> 00:37:30,648
‐ That would get my slacks off
in a snap.
860
00:37:30,682 --> 00:37:32,584
‐ 'Cause that would be
a challenge.
861
00:37:33,151 --> 00:37:35,553
‐ I paid for that truck,
and its contents,
862
00:37:35,587 --> 00:37:36,654
and I'll be french‐fried
863
00:37:36,688 --> 00:37:39,290
if you're going to sell my own
property back to me.
864
00:37:39,324 --> 00:37:42,260
‐ Except I know where it is
and you do not.
865
00:37:42,293 --> 00:37:44,963
But I suppose I could sell
said contents
866
00:37:44,996 --> 00:37:46,397
to the human bar in town...
867
00:37:46,431 --> 00:37:49,234
‐ Let's not get off
on the wrong foot.
868
00:37:50,335 --> 00:37:53,004
‐ I also suggest
that you acquire
869
00:37:53,037 --> 00:37:56,107
protection for your next order
and that would be,
870
00:37:56,141 --> 00:37:58,143
well, yours truly.
871
00:37:58,176 --> 00:38:00,378
An experienced hand
with local knowledge,
872
00:38:00,411 --> 00:38:05,283
who can then safely convey
said truck right to your...
873
00:38:05,316 --> 00:38:07,152
back door.
874
00:38:07,719 --> 00:38:10,255
‐ What would you require
in return?
875
00:38:11,222 --> 00:38:14,425
Something to quench
that vampiric appetite?
876
00:38:15,160 --> 00:38:17,128
When was the last time you fed?
877
00:38:17,162 --> 00:38:19,164
‐ My hunger...
878
00:38:19,197 --> 00:38:20,465
is none of your concern.
879
00:38:20,498 --> 00:38:24,135
What I require
is something more... tangible.
880
00:38:24,169 --> 00:38:26,137
A future favor.
881
00:38:26,671 --> 00:38:28,973
And two thousand a load.
882
00:38:29,007 --> 00:38:31,276
(chuckling)
‐ That's highway robbery.
883
00:38:31,309 --> 00:38:33,411
‐ Precisely.
And at a reasonable cost.
884
00:38:33,444 --> 00:38:36,614
But I assure you,
I am the best.
885
00:38:37,315 --> 00:38:38,616
‐ Mm‐hmm...
886
00:38:44,055 --> 00:38:45,657
(electronic music continues)
887
00:38:47,158 --> 00:38:48,593
‐ You smell like heaven.
888
00:38:48,626 --> 00:38:50,228
‐ I know.
889
00:38:59,003 --> 00:39:04,108
♪ If you could love
me completely ♪
890
00:39:06,711 --> 00:39:11,182
♪ If you could show me
a sign ♪
891
00:39:13,718 --> 00:39:17,388
‐ Having trouble remembering
where you like these lips.
892
00:39:17,422 --> 00:39:20,091
‐ You seem to be figuring
it out.
893
00:39:21,359 --> 00:39:24,329
‐ You know, the garden tried
to fool me.
894
00:39:25,396 --> 00:39:27,432
With a fake you.
895
00:39:27,465 --> 00:39:29,033
‐ You didn't...
896
00:39:29,067 --> 00:39:31,703
‐ No. Not even close.
897
00:39:31,736 --> 00:39:34,372
But I would've known
in a second.
898
00:39:35,306 --> 00:39:37,308
I know every curve...
899
00:39:39,043 --> 00:39:40,712
every sigh...
900
00:39:41,713 --> 00:39:43,648
every taste...
901
00:39:44,682 --> 00:39:46,317
(door closing)
902
00:39:48,419 --> 00:39:51,623
Wynonna, her midnight snack,
and the pantry door.
903
00:39:52,223 --> 00:39:55,059
She never met a thing
she couldn't slam.
904
00:39:56,594 --> 00:39:59,097
‐ Yeah. I guess I'd forgotten.
905
00:40:00,164 --> 00:40:01,699
‐ I love you, Nicole Haught.
906
00:40:01,733 --> 00:40:05,403
And I can't wait for the rest
of our lives to unfold.
907
00:40:10,341 --> 00:40:13,077
Can you tell me about
your year and a half?
908
00:40:14,512 --> 00:40:17,315
‐ I'm sorry,
I'm just... distracted.
909
00:40:17,348 --> 00:40:19,317
I gotta go check those traps.
910
00:40:19,350 --> 00:40:20,551
‐ Oh.
911
00:40:20,585 --> 00:40:23,087
Yeah. Okay. Uh...
912
00:40:23,121 --> 00:40:25,256
Can I come with you?
913
00:40:26,057 --> 00:40:27,525
‐ Always.
914
00:40:27,558 --> 00:40:30,395
(soft music)
915
00:40:40,305 --> 00:40:43,408
‐ Expected date of return?
‐ Never.
916
00:40:43,441 --> 00:40:46,244
My Dad's birthday is in August.
Might surprise him.
917
00:40:46,277 --> 00:40:48,313
‐ I have to get my supervisor.
918
00:40:50,148 --> 00:40:52,550
(radio turns on)
919
00:40:52,583 --> 00:40:54,619
(rock music plays)
920
00:40:59,090 --> 00:41:01,059
(Man): You're cleared to go.
921
00:41:03,194 --> 00:41:05,196
(whispering): They're back.
922
00:41:20,011 --> 00:41:23,214
‐ I'll move out to the barn,
now that everyone's ba
923
00:41:24,082 --> 00:41:26,150
Which is good.
‐ Take the bed.
924
00:41:26,551 --> 00:41:28,353
You've earned it, kid.
925
00:41:28,386 --> 00:41:30,054
Besides...
926
00:41:31,055 --> 00:41:33,124
I'm better in the cold.
927
00:41:34,125 --> 00:41:36,394
‐ Okay, Jon Snow in a B cup.
928
00:41:37,061 --> 00:41:39,230
And I'm not a kid, Wynonna.
929
00:41:41,499 --> 00:41:43,368
‐ Why'd you leave Monument?
930
00:41:44,268 --> 00:41:47,171
‐ When you're a person
who's gone through some stuff,
931
00:41:47,205 --> 00:41:49,374
and you see somebody else,
who's a good person,
932
00:41:49,407 --> 00:41:51,209
also going through some stuff...
933
00:41:52,477 --> 00:41:54,145
‐ How bad is Nicole?
934
00:41:55,046 --> 00:41:58,282
‐ She was alone
for a really long time.
935
00:42:01,019 --> 00:42:02,954
‐ Well, thanks for taking care
of my friend,
936
00:42:02,987 --> 00:42:04,822
Rachel Valdez.
937
00:42:05,156 --> 00:42:08,259
‐ Thank you for noticing,
Wynonna Earp.
938
00:42:08,292 --> 00:42:10,261
Oh, the Earp heir.
939
00:42:16,868 --> 00:42:18,870
‐ Listen. My bed, yeah.
940
00:42:18,903 --> 00:42:21,005
My leather pants, no.
941
00:42:21,039 --> 00:42:22,273
‐ Pfft, please.
942
00:42:22,306 --> 00:42:25,309
I wouldn't be seen wearing these
in front of the skunks I milk.
943
00:42:27,578 --> 00:42:30,381
Your fringed leather jacket,
though...
944
00:42:31,315 --> 00:42:33,951
‐ Don't push your luck,
Smalldez.
945
00:42:35,053 --> 00:42:37,388
Good night.
‐ Good night, Wynonna.
946
00:42:39,323 --> 00:42:41,125
(sighing)
947
00:42:45,430 --> 00:42:48,199
‐ Hello, chaps!
‐ Hands up.
948
00:42:48,232 --> 00:42:51,169
‐ Like I said:
so good to be home.
949
00:42:52,837 --> 00:42:56,007
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