Original subtitles

[COMPUTER BEEPING]

Dr. Weinberger, the data I'm getting on SE-2020 via the DSS

shows that it's moving out of the scheduled orbit.

Punch up SE-2020 with coordinates.

Check the orbit deviation and alert Canberra.

I'll be right there.

We've lost the satellite over Queensland.

They're programmed to self-destruct if they stray from orbit.

[COMPUTER BEEPING]

Canberra lost it when we did.

Order a copy of all transmissions

to DSN stations in the last 24 hours.

[GRUNTS]

[BELCHES]

See, it landed, and then Australia lost transmission.

Looks like the US government has itself a problem in Australia.

[WHOOPING]

Oh, crikey!

Terri, get around. Get the catching bag!

These lizards are like land crocodiles!

And their teeth, they're like tiger sharks!

And if you get too close... Whack! They'll tail-whack ya!

[GRUNTS]

Oh, you're a slippery little guy.

What a stinger!

[WHOOPING]

[COUGHS]

[GROANS]

[GRUNTS]

Close!

Not only can they run like blazes,

but they can also scale these sharp rocks

like it's going out of fashion.

Now, this is his territory.

And up in there, he'll have a couple of good-looking girls,

good-looking Sheilas, just waiting for him.

[GROANS]

He gave me the slip. Oh, that's all right.

Have a look at this!

Poo! Perentie poo!

Oh, what a beauty!

[SNIFFS] Whew!

That's some good Perentie poo, all right.

Now, this can tell me a lot about the animal.

What we've got in here is pig's ear,

snake skin,

a little bit of lizard skin. Oh, and check this out!

A lizard claw!

And that's from another lizard.

You know, the Perentie, he's the master.

He sits up here in the escarpment,

watching out of his nice, cool tunnel.

Watching, waiting. Sees a bit of movement.

They can spot anything moving from 300 meters away!

Way down there in the sand dunes.

Spots it. Goes down. Waits.

Runs out! Strikes! Lacerate!

And then swallow it down whole.

Come back up here into the cool retreat.

Now, this is really important.

I'm going to save this for later.

TERRI: We're here in the Outback

on a field study trip for the zoo.

We're hoping to find some of the more unlovable

of Australia's creatures for research.

Here's your poo, mate.

We're heading for snake country!

Australia is home to the most venomous snakes in the world.

And with a bit of luck, we're gonna find some.

Okay, Sue, in the truck.

This is going to be a great adventure! Right, mate?

[ENGINE STARTS]

You never know what's out there.

Wheeler.Archer.

Must be good if they got us in here at 3:00 a.m.

[GROANS]

Ron.

Oh, Wheeler.

Good to see ya.

At 22:00 hours, East Coast time,

a US satellite's orbit was terminated over Australia

due to mechanical failure.

The primary function of this device was intelligence collection.

Gentlemen. Thanks for coming in at such short notice.

The downed satellite collected sensitive photographic data.

The equivalent of a million images worldwide

are stored inside the hard drive of this.

The black box.

Mmm-hmm.

A beacon. An alpha-proton beacon.

Developed for a Mars mission.

Designed to withstand landing

in the most extreme conditions conceivable.

I didn't know any were operational.

As far as any of us are concerned, none are.

We have every reason to believe that the beacon survived.

Should it end up in the wrong hands,

it has enough documentation to change the power structure

of the entire modern world.

Have you picked up any kind of signal?

Twice in the last four hours. Australia received transmission.

That's encouraging.

It's inconsistent.

Either there's damage, or someone's beaten us to the site.

Well, we'll hope for damage.

Outside this room, we're leaking word of a routine parts pick-up.

Standard satellite junk.

We can't risk tipping anyone to the potential of this thing.

Translation?

You'll only have basic local support. One operative.

So it's really on the two of you.

Gentleman, you leave first thing in the morning.

North Queensland.

Australia.

Thank God it's a friendly country.

[GROANS]

Leave my cows alone!

[COWS MOOING]

So, you think you're going to get away with it that easy, do ya?

I don't think so!

This is private property, you know?

You dirty, rotten, stinking mongrel!

Oh, no.

Poor Daisy.

You no-good, cattle-stealing handbag.

Now, go on, nick off!

[DOGS BARKING]

Hey, hey!

Get down. Down.

What do you want?

Well, if you call off your dogs, I'll let you know.

[WHISTLES]

I'd offer you a cold drink, but I don't want you to stay.

I know since Otis died you've had

a hard time on your own with the cattle, but...

You don't know anything about me and my cattle.

Look, I know you've been shooting up a storm on the river.

Half a dozen people have called in to say so.

[EXCLAIMS]

Brozzie, what you're doing could get you into a serious amount of trouble.

How come it's illegal for me to kill a croc,

but it's not illegal for that same croc to kill my cows, eh?

The law is the law. You just gotta work within the legal boundaries.

You work within the legal boundaries. I'll work with a shotgun.

Now, I'm warning you. Put the gun away. I'll find a solution.

Don't do something you'll regret.

You're standing here, so I guess I already have. Now, rack off, Sam!

Get your scrawny bottom back in that truck before I sic the dogs on you.

Ooh.

Come on. Chop, chop.

You're trespassing on my land, you know.

I mean it, Brozzie.

So do I.

[ENGINE STARTS]

It's croc-killing time.

It's croc-saving time!

STEVE: We've had to interrupt our great adventure

to help some local fishermen with a problem crocodile.

Come on, Sue.

STEVE: In this case, the crocodile sees the fishermen

as the source of its food supply.

And this young tacker has been getting very cheeky.

The last few months, a crocodile has been causing trouble

around here where people are swimming.

[ENGINE STARTS]

Now what happens when the blokes come back from fishing

is they filet their fish, throw all the scraps in the water,

and, of course, that encourages the croc to hang around.

And now, everybody that comes down here

is scared the croc's going to have a go at 'em.

STEVE: As the world population explodes,

our wildlife is under increasing pressure to survive

as natural habitat diminishes every single day.

Our job is to locate the croc,

jump it, try and get it into the boat

and then relocate it into a section of the river

where it'll never run into a conflict with people again.

Now, it's not the croc's fault.

He doesn't come into our swimming pool.

We're actually going into his.

They're apex predators right at the top of the food chain

and without crocodiles, the whole ecosystem would suffer.

We've got to catch this croc.

Otherwise, they'll shoot it dead

and turn it into boots, bags and belts.

STEVE: During the day, a crocodile in this river

can remain almost invisible.

But when night falls,

our spotlights should lead us to him like a signpost.

And I'll face the added danger

of having to catch this crocodile by hand.

Steve's been catching crocodiles this way

with his dad since he was a small boy.

But the real dangerous part is judging the size of the croc before jumping it.

We're looking for eye shine.

Crocodiles are ambush predators.

They rely on camouflage.

But in the spotlight, their eyes shine bright red

which enables us to sneak right up on them.

Got it. Got it, mate! Got it! Keep your spottie right on it.

Get around. Get around. Get around.

STEVE: Here is a battle of strength and endurance.

The only way to toss this croc is to wear him out.

He's got the strength of three blokes my size!

Get the top jaw rope!

STEVE: Our only means of restraining him is via a top jaw rope.

Get her with a top jaw rope!

It's critical to get his top jaw secured.

Lassoing those gnashing, thrashing teeth doesn't come easy.

Get it on, mate!

I can't get it. She's thrashing too hard!

STEVE: If I loosen my grip, he'll rip me to shreds.

Go! Go! Go!

I got it. I got it. Hang onto her. I'll tie her off.

The second top jaw rope is not on really good.

[WHIMPERS]

TERRI: Protect Suey. Get the top jaw rope.

[SIGHS]

Too easy, mate.

[LAUGHS]

I called you in because you're an Aussie.

I have an important assignment for you.

It appears the CIA are sending two undercover field operatives to Australia

to retrieve the SE-2020's data recorder.

I thought that satellite surveillance was your department's domain.

It is. But Reynolds got the jump on me.

He bypassed the National Reconnaissance Office

before I got a chance to respond.

He's after the top job, and this could just give him the edge over me.

What do you want me to do?

Get the beacon before Archer and Wheeler.

Australia's main industries are mining and agriculture.

Coal is the most important resource,

followed by copper, lead and bauxite.

It's a decent cover.

Let's go with mineral exploration.

We're taking the mobile antenna?Yeah.

This sure doesn't look like your average satellite recovery situation,

does it?

The Aussie contact won't figure it out.

Well,

this is all I need.

Come on.

There's nothing that's gonna hurt you in Australia.

STEVE: This is the fierce snake.

Whoa, whoa. Come here, mate.

The most venomous snake in the world! This is one wild unit.

This is the snake you don't want to get tagged by

because it possesses enough venom to kill 150,000 rats.

But who cares?

This bloke could have enough venom in one bite

to kill 100 blokes my size.

Look at the coloration. Beautiful coloration.

Hey, hey! Hey, hey! Settle down, mate.

[SNAKE HISSES]

You wouldn't want to take a whack off a snake this size.

You can see behind his head, that's his venom glands.

Whoo!

This is where you see the work of my dad, is right here.

He taught me to be one-on-one with the snake.

To be at one with it. To feel it in my fingers.

To allow the snake to feel that it's in no danger.

Settle down, sweetheart. Settle down now.

She's just trying to tag Steve-o on the face. I know you are, sweetheart.

You're a beautiful snake. You're absolutely gorgeous.

It's starting to flatten its throat out now.

So it's just starting to get a little aggressive.

Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey, hey!

Hey, hey, hey, hey! Whoa, whoa!

You're all right, mate. Hey, hey! Settle down. Settle down.

See, it's coming back on me. Comin' back real fast.

These snakes seem to know the toxicity of their own venom.

You can see it's swinging around, it's agitated, the neck's starting to puff up.

That rapid tongue flicking. It's getting upset.

Make no doubt about it,

it'd whack its fangs into me at any given moment.

See how it keeps lining me up?

It's getting really, really grumpy.

Beautiful snake!

[SNAKE HISSES]

You're just a little grumpy now. They're just like people.

She just wants to move away from me.

A lot of people think that snakes are evil, ugly monsters

that cruise around killing people.

And those fangs, those fangs, they're like hypodermic needles.

Two hypodermic needles sitting in the back of their head, ready to...

Whoa!

Whoa, hey, hey, hey. Settle down, sweetheart.

How was that for a swing? Straight at me!

How's these flies? Look at, right in me eyes!

It's so dry and hot out here, the flies are coming into my eyes for a drink!

Any form of moisture.

Whoo! She's starting to settle down now. Get off me!

Look at this. Nice and quiet.

Look at her. What a beauty.

I call it "her" 'cause I'm in love with her now.

She knows that I mean her no harm.

What a beautiful snake. You know what? I'm a professional.

You see a snake like this, don't muck with it.

And one thing's for sure, don't try this at home!

Far too dangerous.

This snake could have enough venom to kill me

and 100 other blokes out here in the west.

What an honor to share territory, to share space

with such a beautiful animal!

Oh, steamer.

I got to tell you, I'd rather deal with this snake

than a lot of people I know.

I reckon that people are much more dangerous.

[SNAKE HISSES]

No questions?

Gentlemen, that concludes this briefing.

MAN: Yes, sir.

Reynolds, do you have a second?

Sure.

I was surprised with the selection of the Australian mission.

Surprised or disappointed?

Both. The second member of the team should have been from my department.

Wheeler will do just fine.

Fine isn't really what my division aims for.

Wheeler's got excellent support.

I've got no doubts about their chances for success.

So you won't be offended if I keep a close eye on the situation?

There's a line. We'll both know if you've crossed over it.

[SIGHS]

Brozzie.

Brozzie.

[COWBELLS CHIME]

[DOGS BARKING]

[DOGS BARKING]

Oh, sugar! Oh!

Go on! Go on! Get away! Go on!

Get away! Get away! Shoo!

Brozzie!

Get away! Go on! Shoo! Shoo, doggies!

Go on, shoo, shoo! Go home! Go home!

Hey, hey, look, look here.

[COWBELLS CHIMING]

[PANTING]

[DOGS GROWL]

Brozzie.

Don't bother getting out.

I won't.Good.

Perfectly content to stay where I am, thanks.

What is it this time?

I've got some good news for you.

You've been fired from Fauna and Fisheries?

No, I've found some experts for us on crocs.

Unless they work in a belt factory, I'm not interested.

The Irwins are relocation specialists. Best in the country.

Oh, really? Maybe I could have them over for afternoon tea.

Throw a nice, big croc on the barbie.

Yeah, well, I've asked the main office to get in touch with them.

You can tell the main office

that I'll be getting in touch with a croc on my own, thank you.

Oh, come on, Brozzie, they're experts.

Now, go on, nick off!

[DOGS BARKING]

Oh, sugar.

See you've been feeding my dogs.

What's the Aussie guy's name?

Jo Buckley.

Jo, huh?

Jo Buckley. Welcome to Queensland.

Vaughan Archer.

[IN HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] Bob Wheeler.

[BOTH CLEAR THROAT]

Looks like an interesting place.

We always say we've got something here for everyone.

Have you got any immediate requests?

Yeah. Okay.No, thanks.

We're anxious to get on the road.

The vehicle looks good.

What's the story with this?

Oh, kangaroos.

STEVE: Roo bars or bull bars

are often the cause of sudden death

for wildlife here in the Outback.

Millions of animals die every year from collisions with vehicles.

Kangaroos, in particular, are getting clobbered all over the bush.

What a shame!

And this is a tragedy that we see all too often

out here on the Outback roads in Australia.

Part of our job is to pull the carcass back off the road

so that any wildlife that comes to feed on it

doesn't get clobbered by another vehicle.

Steve, she's got a joey.

Come here. We might have a chance to save her baby.

There's a girl.

She feels cold.

Does she? I'll tell you what, mate, I'll nurse her.

If you whip your shirt off,

we'll give her something warm to cuddle up in.

A joey this size would never fend for herself.

She's going to need us to help her survive.

We've been adoptive parents

for joey kangaroos for many, many years.

And we successfully raised them

and got them back out into the wilds of Australia where they belong.

But I tell you what,

they take a heck of a lot of nurturing and caring.

You all right? Come on, girls. Let's go.

Oh, you're kicking! Come on.

And just as well, we're prepared for any wildlife emergency.

We have to feed her just like a baby,

every couple of hours around the clock.

Here we go, sweetheart.

You ready?

Okay, just like in mama's pouch. Upside-down.

Hmm.

This will teach you to go after my cows,

you no-good, rotten crocodile.

A nice, juicy chicken for ya.

WHEELER: How long are you gonna need with all this stuff?

Until I hook up with the network,

I won't know if there's a problem with the beacon or it's just our equipment.

It won't take me long to set up the antenna.

Need some help?

I got it covered.

What about you? Anything you need?

He's the technical guy. I'm strategy.

Oh.

Uh, as long as we've got some down time, how about you and I...

I'll get some rest.

[SCOFFS]

Here. You'll need that.

Right here on the ground?

There's nothing out here to worry about.

STEVE: This is the bird-eating spider!

The largest arachnid in Australia!

I'm just going to see if I can get a stick, because she is...

Whoa, whoa, whoa. See that movement?

These guys are ambush predators.

They just launch themselves onto their prey,

hang onto it with their front legs

and just drive their fangs right into it!

See how she's got her legs up? Have a look at this.

That's not the spider shaking. That's me shaking!

These things make me nervous. And here's why.

See her little legs sticking up?

Whoa, whoa! You're all right, sweetheart.

You're all right. You're all right.

Crikey!

[WHOOPING]

But what they do is they wait for their food source to come to them.

Ow, crikey! Ant just bit me on the back.

This is scary, I tell you. I'm, like, so nervous.

They'll wait down in their hole

and then when the cool of night comes,

they'll climb up the web of their hole

and they're sitting right at the front of their hole, just like this,

in the full ambush position.

You all right, sweetheart?

There! Whoo! There she is. Just like that. Ready.

Any animal that she can overpower

and kill with her venom, that's her target.

Animal like a mouse, a frog, a lizard, geckos,

small birds, grasshoppers, anything comes past.

She'll wait in the ambush position,

fly out of the hole, grab it, and whack!

Drive those huge great fangs right into its chest cavity!

They've got very toxic venom,

super-toxic venom, and a lot of it!

Their fangs, larger than a snake's!

Crikey, they're powerful animals!

Sometimes, they'll actually kill their prey

just with the force, the ferocity

of that hit and the fangs going in.

That's how powerful they are.

Let me just see if I can demonstrate her fangs.

Get out of my eyes, flies. Not now! Get out.

Come on, buddy. Come on, sweetheart.

You're all right, mate.

Whoa.

Stop there. Stop there, babe. Stop there.

[SPIDER HISSES]

[EXCLAIMS]

That was a strike. That was a strike.

I upset her.

This is nature's way. She's a grumpy girl.

She's a beautiful Sheila, actually.

Show us your fangs, sweetheart.

Right there!

Have a look at the size of these things!

Look at that! Oh, look at 'em driving into the stick!

Whoo! You can feel them grinding into the stick.

Has she got a set of fangs on her, or what?

Have a go at that! Look at this!

There they are,

bigger than most of the Australian snakes' fangs.

[EXCLAIMS]

She just injected a bit of venom there.

Have a go... Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Sorry, sweetheart.

That "whoa," my breath, scared her

and she got really nervous and had a bit of a strike there.

Have a go at this. Look at that.

Look at the droplets of venom on that stick.

Real syrupy thick venom! And she'd have a lot of it.

We should get this girl back to Australia Zoo

so as we can do research on the toxicity of the venom.

And that will give us the indication

of how we can best look after them and this entire environment.

She's a beautiful girl, all right. Really nice.

But I tell you what,

whatever you do, don't ever try and wrangle a spider.

I'd hate to get this amount of venom stuck into my veins.

I reckon it would be one heck of a rough journey. Could even kill me.

Hey, Ter! Hey, Terri! Can you get a container?

I've got a big bird-eater, mate!

Whoo!

Breeding season is a real bummer for the male bird-eating spider

because after they mate,

the female kills and eats him.

Come on, sweetheart.

[EXCLAIMING]

Throw the lid on, mate.Careful, Steve.

[CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY]

They say I've got nerves of steel,

except when I'm dealing with spiders.

Have a go at this. In this hole, I reckon we're onto something.

What we've got here is a beautiful hole.

You can see tripwires out in front. Here's one, two, three.

And that's what stimulates the spider, whammo!

Strike and hit. Whoo! Good hole!

It's not completely understood why or how they build these holes.

And it's pretty... Ah!

Just kidding.

If we have a look down in there, here's a chamber.

And here's what was in the chamber.

Pretty well busted up.

Couple of... Ooh, gooey.

...fang marks in the abdomen there.

She's had a feed on this bloke!

This was actually, uh, her husband.

He probably mated with her

over the last couple of days or the last couple of nights.

Whammo! "I'm finished with you."

Well, seems pretty harsh, but this is nature's way.

STEVE: We were heading further into the Outback,

when out of the blue, a call from the Department of Fauna and Fisheries

suddenly changed our plans.

The local ranger, Sam Flynn,

is having a problem with a large, rogue crocodile on a river just north of here,

and he needs our help.

It seems a big ol' croc has been giving a rancher a hard time

and the situation is way out of hand.

The wildlife service needs our help.

It sounds like the rancher is tough. Real tough.

And the croc sounds good. Real good.

Yeah.

From what we've heard, someone needs to be relocated.

We could go in at night, shine a light in the rancher's eyes,

jump on her back, throw her in the boat,

wrap a rope around her head,

and then we could take her to a new river system.

But we're not that brave. We're going after the croc!

[SNORING]

[ROARS]

Rack off! Nick off, go on!

[GROWLS]

[SCREAMS]

I'll get you, you rotten... Show us your eyes. Come on.

[SCREAMING]

Now I got ya, ya mongrel!

[SHOTGUN CLICKS]

Oh, dear.

Oh.

[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

JO: Everything okay?

I lost it again.

Thanks.

Either it's damaged or it's in the river.

Submersion in water would affect the transmission of the signal.

Well, the inflatable on top has got a decent outboard motor.

And I also packed a depth finder and an underwater scanner.

So, if we end up fishing for it, we should be covered.

You Aussies think of everything, don't you?

[CHUCKLES]

What did you bring to protect us from alligators?

Crocodiles in this country.

Same thing.

Hardly. You'll know it if you meet a croc.

[COMPUTER BEEPS]It's back!

Snake!

[TIRES SCREECH]

Have a go at this whopper!

[WHOOPING] Hey, hey, hey!

This is a King... Hey!

King Brown. Babe, get the catching bag!

King Brown. You can see why they call him King Brown.

This is a snake rescue.

We need to take him with us and set him up somewhere

where he's not going to run into a conflict with cars.

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Nuts!

King Brown snake. Member of the black snake family.

Come out here onto the road

trying to get a little bit of sunlight, heat up in the morning.

Whoo!

See the way when he flattens his neck out?

That typical cobra neck flattening?

What he's doing is he's saying, "I'm venomous,

"I'm wild, and I'll bite ya!"

Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Did you see that?

You wouldn't want to take a bite around here.

[WHOOPING]

Their venom is highly necrotic.

That means you rot and things drop off.

[WHOOPS] I'd hate to get bitten there.

Steady, mate. Steady, steady, you're all right.

And this snake species actually has the highest venom yield

of any snake in Australia.

Pretty soon, he'll settle down.

He'll work out that I mean him no harm.

It's a real good thing that me and Terri came along.

Otherwise, the next car down this track would have slaughtered him.

And they're quick and they'll eat other snakes.

There's not another snake... Hey.

...that they'd come across that they wouldn't eat.

In fact, this big bloke here,

he probably would have eaten

other venomous snakes of his species.

They can actually be cannibalistic. Get out of my eyes!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, don't bite my boot!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.

Right behind his head, right in there,

are two huge venom glands.

And he'd be able to belt in, like two hypodermic needles

around about 300 milligrams of venom in one hit.

Terri, where's the catching bag?

Got it!

Good one, mate.

Go! Twist.

Whoo! King Brown!

That's one snake to release, and one croc to catch.

ARCHER: We got a couple of problems.

The beacon's still transmitting the intermittent signal,

which means it's probably at the bottom of the river.

And I got a partner who won't want to get his gun wet.

It's on this property. The river should be right down there.

So we run our cover, gain access and, uh, execute.

What about the dogs?

We'll take our chances.

[CHICKENS CLUCKING]

We're set. No one's around to get in the way.

You look beat.

We got trouble with the satellite investigation.

Personnel or hardware?

Possibly both.

Do you need me to stay on in case anything comes in?

Yeah, if you don't mind.

No, of course not.

I've got a State Department reception at the embassy with Ansell.

If I don't show, could send up a flare there's a problem.

And the last thing we need is for anyone

to think there's a leak in the boat.

We're looking for a big male croc.

Probably around the 12 to 14 foot mark.

And according to the ranger,

he's dominated this section of the river for quite some time.

All of the riverbank in this area is private property.

But to a big old croc, this is his territory.

It's a real shame when people come along and they want him out.

Finding him could take days, even weeks.

And he's probably watching us right now.

I'm gonna have to go ashore and look for slides.

They're the marks on the banks

that are left by crocodiles sunning themselves.

Okay, Ter, this looks promising.

Keep your wits about you, mate.

STEVE: I've been studying crocodile behavior all my life

and I know exactly what signs to look for.

Here we go. This is what we're looking for!

Have a look at this for a classic slide.

Big belly mark here. Two feet.

Look at that! This puts him about that wide.

Straight up here. Foot marks.

Oh. He's come straight down through here.

There's the slide. Feet marks. Straight down in there.

And this is a recently fresh slide.

STEVE: With this evidence, the crocodile must be close. Real close.

Here we go. This is wet.

That means the crocodile has come up here

just moments before I got here.

He's probably sitting out there in a camouflaged position.

Whoa!

Hey, hey, hey! Hey, hey, hey!

Hey, Terri, I got him!

Hey, hey, hey!

[EXCLAIMS]

Bring the boat! Get the boat down here!

[ENGINE SPUTTERS]

Nuts!

Come on, Ter! What are you doing?Come on!

[ENGINE STARTS]

Whoa!

He's coming! He's coming!

STEVE: Move back! Reverse, mate! Reverse!

Never seen a croc this determined in my life!

Suey, stay there. If he comes over, I'm gonna top jaw rope him.

He's at the back of the boat.

Get ready with the oar, mate.

Whoa!

STEVE: This croc must have taken a hammering from the locals.

For him to be this aggressive,

he must have been tormented something shocking!

My guess is he's been shot at by poachers,

maybe even trapped by them, and got away.

STEVE: This bloke is one angry, naughty, aggressive crocodile

and this is going to be one very dangerous capture.

Whoa! Crikey!

[SIGHS]

He's wild, all right. Come on, then. Come on, then.

TERRI: Don't miss.

TERRI: This is very, very dangerous.

One slip by Steve, and this croc could have his hand.

The animal could even flip our small boat over with no trouble at all.

STEVE: Crikey, he's angry!

Man, he's aggressive! He's blowing bubbles. He's very aggressive.

[EXCLAIMS] I think I've got him.

TERRI: He's got enough strength to pull Steve clean out of the boat.

No, he spat it. Hold your ground.

I thought I had him that time.

I've never tried to top jaw rope a crocodile

out in the middle of a river like this.

He's grumpy, and he's power...

Oh!

TERRI: He's coming in. He's coming in. We can't keep doing this.

STEVE: I nearly got him.

No, he nearly got us.

Oh, he's right here.

If he comes in the boat, it's gonna make it a lot easier to top jaw rope him.

Babe, get ready to gun the boat.

If I get the rope on this time,

keep a bit of weight on it. This time. Come on, Steve-o.

All right, come on. Come on, mate. Come on.

Oh!

Crikey!

Go, babe, go! Go! Go!

Go with him, babe, but don't get in front of him.

Whoo! Can you believe this?

Being towed by a 12-footer!

If we can stay with him long enough, he's bound to get tired.

That's it. That's a good pace, good pace.

This bloke's got attitude.

And I don't know whether I've got him, whoa, or he's got me.

TERRI: Suddenly, the rope went slack.

He's stopped. Probably run out of steam.

But I don't trust him.

[SHOUTS]

Steve!

[GASPING]

Lost him.

[GASPING]

It's coming back.

Babe, get the boat over here!

[CROCODILE ROARS]

Oh!

That crocodile nearly got me, Suey!

[SUEY WHINES]

[GASPS] Now she's gone slack.

It looks like he's thrown the top jaw rope.

Whoa!

Babe, stay up with him! Stay up with him!

[GASPS]

This bloke's going flat out like a lizard drinking!

We're in for the ride of our lives! Whoo-hoo!

STEVE: Keep up with him, Terri! Whoo-hoo!

Hmm? Mmm?

STEVE: Crikey! This croc is never gonna give up!

Just stay with him, babe. He's steamin'!

I've never seen a crocodile

with so much determination and power.

And it seems he knows exactly where he's taking us.

[GRUNTING]

Straight up that small creek.

[GRUNTING]

Here we go.

Watch it.

[STEVE EXCLAIMS]

STEVE: No wonder these modern-day dinosaurs have survived

over 60 million years. They're just so cunning!

Oh, no!

Oh, crikey! Duck!

Steve!

Stay with him, babe!

Get up, up, up!

I got him!

[GRUNTS]

This croc's smart. Real smart.

But he's running out of water and steam.

He's shot up this creek to give us the flick.

[GRUNTS]

Go, babe, go, go, go! He's cornered.

He's cornered! He's cornered!

Take this rope.

TERRI: Okay, I got it.

Take it.

[GROANS]

Oh!

He's backing me up! Go, go, go!

STEVE: Whoa! Pull!

Hurry up, Ter. What are you doing?

TERRI: He's moving too much. Hang on to him!

TERRI: Okay.

He's tired, mate. Gotta get his bottom jaw.

I know, I'm going to get my stick here.

Oh.

[SIGHS]

Oh.

Gotta get this side. Hang on to him.

STEVE: I'm all right, mate. I'm good, I'm great!

TERRI: Come on.

Get near my teeth.

TERRI: Oh, I don't have to use a stick.

No, you don't.

Okay, now get it under the other rope.Okay.

Get it under the other top jaw rope.

Yep! I'm gonna have to use my fingers, all right? Coming over the top.

Okay.

TERRI: Okay, I got it.

STEVE: Go!

All right.

[HUFFING]

TERRI: Hang on!

[STEVE SHOUTING]

Come on, big boy.

[TERRI GRUNTS]

STEVE: Come on, big boy!

We gotta go for that bank.TERRI: Yeah.

Okay, here we go again.

TERRI: You okay?

He's breaking me neck! Flip the boat off me!

[TERRI GRUNTS]

I'm losing him.

[GROANS]

Move your legs, sweetheart. Don't worry about him. Get off the boat.

Move, move, move.

[GRUNTS]

STEVE: Suey, up! Suey, up! There you are.

[SUEY BARKS]

STEVE: Come on, big boy. Let's go back.

[TERRI GRUNTS]

Top jaw rope. Pull it that way.

I know.

[TERRI GRUNTING]

Suey, up. Get up. Up, up, up! Good girl.

He's probably going to react when I fire this boat up.

You all right? Here we go.Yep.

STEVE: The only thing left to do now is to take this,

the apex predator, as far away from here as possible.

Slip the blindfold up under my arm. Here you go.

You all right?

Yeah. You drive the boat.Okay.

[RINGING]

Ansell.

Archer and Wheeler are close to recovery.

I shouldn't have any problems getting the beacon

before they set foot in the water.

Keep me in the loop.

[BEEPS]

This is the spot where the last clear signal came from.

So it must be in the water.

That would account for the transmission disruption.

Wait a minute, I'm getting a signal.

Yeah, so it must be in the water

or someone may already have it.

ARCHER: It's headed this way.

WHEELER: Eh?

Is that an outboard?

[CLEARS THROAT] See anything?

You're not going to believe this.

Give me that.

Get Reynolds.

I think the binoculars have just picked up the Discovery Channel.

And you wanted to keep this a low-key operation.

[DOGS BARKING]

Run!

[DOGS BARKING]

[DOG GROWLING]

Did you hear that?

Gunshots. Just ahead.

Could only be poachers.

[CROCODILE GROWLS]

STEVE: Whoa, settle down, mate.

Settle down, mate. Settle down.

No wonder this poor, old crocodile is so aggressive.

We've got to get him out of this river system,

otherwise he won't survive.

Babe, we're going for the truck.Okay.

So I want you to jump on the croc.All right.

Right up the front, all your weight.Okay.

Two, three, go!

Got it.Get it, mate.

You all right?Got him.

Call it if you come unglued, mate.Okay.

Poachers are the bane of my existence.

Once we get this crocodile safe and sound,

I'm gonna come back here and give them a bit of Steve-o education.

Crocodiles aren't evil, ugly monsters

just waiting to kill people. No way!

They deserve respect and conservation.

Trespassing on my land's good enough reason to be shot.

But having a go at my dogs? Well...

Now, that's a lynching crime around here.

Ma'am, I was only trying to scare them.

They were trying to rip us apart.

Might've been kinder than leaving the job to me.

Uh-uh.

We work for the government.

Oh.

You those useless croc catchers Sam Flynn sent for?

[SCOFFS]

That's us.

We're looking for crocs.

ARCHER: Seen any recently?

How about we all take a little run up to the house, eh?

Call Sam Flynn. See what he thinks about all this.

Why don't you and Jo go?

And we'll stay here and keep searching. Hmm?

You, get in the bike.

My dogs will stay here and, uh, keep you two company.

[WHISTLES]

This is why I constantly tell you people to expect the unexpected.

Yes, sir.

Okay, what have we got?

Well, we've put together a brief overview of the suspects.

It appears from this initial background check

that they've been actively in the field on assignment since 1992.

The areas they frequent are always remote and often highly sensitive.

For example, in 1996, '97,

the Irwins were in Indonesia during the political unrest.

They were also traveling in various parts of South America in '97

and were present for two coups that year.

AGENT: In '98, they were in Kenya when our embassy was targeted

and in East Timor in '99, just after the civil war.

In '99 and 2000, the Irwins had full access

to military personnel and property on United States Air Force bases

in Eglin, Florida, and Luke, Arizona.

And our conclusion...

There are too many different locations with too many highly sensitive situations

for any of this to be coincidence.

AGENT: And now, our agents in northern Australia

have reported that the Irwins have beat them to the satellite beacon,

which we believe is in their possession.

Is there any chance that they were just out filming

and they picked up this hardware by mistake?

No.

Take a look at this.

In 2001,

the Irwins announced that their zoo in Australia

was undergoing a $40 million expansion plan.

You don't make that kind of money on cable television.

Hmm.

In you go, mate. Lid, lid, lid!

[SIGHS]

Usually, we relocate crocodiles

back in the same river system, but out of harm's way.

But this croc, we're going to have to box and drive

over the other side of the mountains

to a completely new river system.

The poachers, they're going to persist until they get him.

And this croc is game. Real game.

Two, three, up!

Come forward. That's it. That's it.

STEVE: Dad and I have learned over the years

the only way to transport crocs successfully

is to hold them in a wooden crate,

where they can't hurt themselves or us.

And they arrive at their destination with minimal stress

and ready for a quick release.

This croc has proven that he has no fear of man.

And that's dangerous for the croc. Real dangerous.

[ENGINE STARTS]

Leave it!

You can look, but don't touch.

[BEEPS]

Do you mind if I wash up?

Mmm.

Don't run the water too long.

We only got tanks out here.

SAM: Hello, Sam Flynn.

Trust your mob to send three city slickers to do

a job I could have done with one bullet!

The beacon's still moving.

They're getting further away.

WHEELER: One of us will have to make a run for the car.

[DOG BARKS]

WHEELER: I used this on my last assignment with the Arctic wolves.

Did it work?

Most of the time.

But, uh, it can exert the opposite motivation.

Meaning?

They'll attack.

[WHISTLE BLOWING]

[WHIMPERING]

BROZZIE: The two blokes look like they'd never been out of an office

their whole lives.

The girl might chip a fingernail if she's not careful.

[WATER RUNNING]

Oy! Turn the damn water off!

Hang on a second. I think one of them's taking a bath.

Water's worth more than gold out here!

What are you doing in there?

Oy!

Hmm?

SAM ON PHONE: Brozzie, you there? Broz...

Huh?

[PANTING]

Huh?

Mongrel!

ARCHER: The croc guy's moved a long way from the river.

We'll have to go like hell to catch him.

Yeah. But they're moving slowly.

If we pull out onto this old road, we should come in right behind them.

Once we're on them, it's gonna be a very sensitive situation.

Mmm-hmm.

Well, I think it's time we got what we came for.

[BEEPS]

[DOG GROWLS]

[DOG BARKING]

[CHICKENS CLUCKING]

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTS]

STEVE: Fair dinkum, we're always rescuing animals.

Our truck's startin' to fill up.

We got Suey the dog, joey kangaroo,

bird-eating spider, King Brown snake

and a crocodile to release

just over this mountain at the Thomson River.

Uh-oh. We've got company.

They're in a hurry. A real hurry.

Steve, with animals on board,

we're going to have to pull over and let this vehicle pass.

Yeah. I don't want to stress the crocodile more than I have to.

He's been through enough for one day.

Crikey! These blokes are mad. Real mad!

With all that gunfire earlier, this must be the poachers!

Steve, I don't think we should stop.

[ENGINE REVVING]

These blokes mean business!

They probably know we've got the croc on board

and they want it.

STEVE: Crikey!

I've never seen poachers this persistent.

These blokes will stop at nothing.

Here, quick, babe, take the wheel.

[GRUNTS]

STEVE: Try not to hit any bumps.

Be careful, Steve.

Remember, you've got a croc on board.

This bloke's trespassing on my territory.

Haven't they got a cheek?

Steady mate. This bloke's off the Richter scale!

Whoa! Crikey!

Mmm!

[TIRES SCREECHING]

Whoa!

Lucky my wife's such a good driver!

You've been upsetting my crocs, mate!

[GRUNTING]

[STEVE GROANS]

[SCREAMS]

They never know when to let go, do they?

Isn't he gorgeous?

This is where your journey ends, mate.

Danger. Danger. Danger.

[SCREAMS]

See ya.

Whoa!

Well, that's one poacher

that just learned a valuable Steve-o lesson.

Don't muck with it!

Okay, babe, I'm coming back in.

[GRUNTS]

[FARTS]

[GRUNTING]

[GRUNTS]

[FARTS]

Hmm?

[BARKS]

Mongrel!

BROZZIE: Come back here with my plane, you wanker!

[GROANS]

You okay?

[COUGHS]

Thought you said there was nothing to worry about in Australia.

You're lucky it's such a friendly country.

Anything broken?

[SCOFFS] Nothing retribution won't fix.

Good. Let's go.

Let's find my gun first.

[COUGHS]

One, two, three, pull!

Pull!

Pull!

Whoa!

Hang onto him, babe.

He's quieted down enough. I'm going to the truck.

All right. Be quick.

You okay?Yep.

We managed to give the poachers the slip.

But I'll be much happier when we get this bloke

into his new territory.

Check this out!

Croc poo.

This animal's been stressed.

Real stressed!

Those poachers, they've got a lot to answer for.

What the heck is this?

No wonder the croc's been cranky!

Looks like some kind of metal object.

You know, crocs can digest fur,

feather and bone, but not metal.

Even a beer can will kill 'em!

Looks like some kind of kid's top or something.

You know, people need to be more careful

when they discard their rubbish.

It's articles like this which is decimating our wildlife!

I'm gonna take this back and study it a bit later on.

Hey, Ter, hang onto this for us!

[EXCLAIMS IN DISGUST]

Crikey, I'd love to get my hands on the owner!

Come on, Sue, in the boat.

Oh, no.

Brozzie?

Brozzie.

BROZZIE: Help! I'm in the bathroom!

[COCKS RIFLE]

BROZZIE: I'm in here, you idiot!

Ooh!

Oh, sugar.

[DOGS BARKING]

Oh, no.

They're back on the river.

Check their truck. I'll get the boat.

Motor's still warm!

They no doubt think they've given us the slip.

WHEELER: Hey, there's a baby kangaroo in here!

And some left-over takeout food.

[SCREAMING]

[GUN FIRING]

Good shot. I guess they know now they didn't give us the slip.

[BEEPING]

ANSELL: What the hell's going on down there?

JO: I'm at the Thomson River.

So far I've been balled up by some gun-wielding rancher

and chased by a pack of wild dogs.

Get rid of everything.

JO: Don't worry. I won't leave any evidence.

MERVE ON RADIO: I'm telling you, Sam,

you better get that idiot, Brozzie Drewitt, out of there

before she kills someone.

Yes, thanks, Merve. I appreciate that.

Oh, good thing so many people around here hate you.

Half a dozen neighbors have called in to complain about your dangerous flying.

Well, nearest I can figure, your plane's probably headed towards the Thomson River.

Another thing you can figure on,

I'll be billing you for the cost of my barn.

[DOGS BARKING]

STEVE: This is gonna be the crocodile's new home.

I don't think we can risk it any further.

By the sound of that gunfire, they're right behind us!

Safest place for this bloke is back in the drink.

[CROCODILE ROARS]

STEVE: Whoa!

[STEVE GRUNTING]

Just go forward. Go forward.

[WHIMPERS]

Suey, go for the bank, mate!

STEVE: Suey can sense that it's safer on the riverbank.

She knows that at any minute this crocodile could death-roll or head-shake

and send us all into the water.

STEVE: You don't want to tip the boat over, mate.

Grab the top jaw ropes.

Okay.

TERRI: His eyes are completely uncovered.

Watch he doesn't head-bash you, mate. He'll snap your legs.

Just one loop round.

I'm going with the other one.

His eyes are uncovered. Do you want me to cover them?

No, mate. There's nothing we can do from here.

TERRI: Okay.You ready?

Yep.

STEVE: I'm going in, baby.Go.

[WHIMPERS]

Hey, big boy.

Okay.

STEVE: We're doing it.

Just sit there with your hands on his eyes.Yup.

Oh!

[STEVE GRUNTING]

That's great.

Now... Okay, here comes the dangerous bit.

Hey, big boy, you're almost home.

You're almost there, fella.

TERRI: There he goes.

Not yet. Not yet.

Keep the strain on it.

STEVE: This is dangerous for me and the crocodile.

If the croc gets away from us now,

his jaws are tied shut and he'd never survive.

And if I'm not fast enough when I cut the rope,

I could lose a hand, or even worse.

STEVE: Here we go, big boy. You're free.

[EXCLAIMS]

STEVE: There he goes!

Yes! Job done. Let's head for home.

[BOAT MOTOR WHIRRING]

Hey, Steve, I think I hear a motor.

Could be the poachers. Right-o.

Let's get Suey, then we'll pretend we've still got the croc on board.

[MOTOR STARTS]

STEVE: Suey's worked with me all of her life.

And as long as she can see me, she'll wait till we pick her up.

She's been me best mate for 13 years,

helping me catch hundreds of crocodiles

and dealing with countless numbers of poachers

and wildlife perpetrators.

We shouldn't have any trouble

giving these blokes the slip.

If we can fool them into thinking

that we've still got the croc in the boat,

then we can lead them away from here on a wild goose chase.

Crikey! It's those same two blokes!

Hundreds of miles of river and they're on us again.

No croc would stand a chance against them.

Okay, Ter, spin around, mate.

How's this, Terri? Look like I'm laying on a croc?

If we can lure them far enough up river,

our croc will stand a chance.

We've got a more powerful outboard, and they'll never catch up.

Have a go at this, will ya?

Crikey!

Hold her steady, mate.

Whoo!

Oh! Did you see that?

Must be some sort of poacher war!

And we're fierce smack-dab in the middle of it!

Crikey, if they keep throwing that dynamite out,

it might kill our croc! And we can't have that!

STEVE: Here, let me at them.

[GUN FIRING]

This is getting very dangerous.

[BOTH SCREAMING]

Holy smokes!

These blokes are serious! Let's get out of here, mate!

Hang on!

STEVE: Whoa!

Another coat of paint and we'd be history.

Steve, he's coming back.

That's it. I'm getting grumpy now.

Here, Ter, take over.

Hey, Ter, let me take over!

Brace yourself!

[MOTOR REVVING]

[GRUNTS]

Take a look at this, will ya? Sweating bullets!

We're out of here.

[GASPING]

Have a go at this.

If they stay in the water long enough,

the hunters will become the hunted.

[LAUGHS] That's nature's way.

[GASPING]

We've received a communique from Australia.

It seems the mission was less than a success.

Unfortunately, we're now going to have to call in

the Defense Department.

SAM: I don't like to say this,

but it doesn't look as though she would have survived this kind of crash.

The police will probably have to drag the river.

[SCOFFS] Waste of money. She's probably still out there now, watching us.

Or maybe a croc got her.

Hmm.

Hey, come on, Brozzie, it's his territory. Just leave him be.

Yeah, settle down. Just habit. I won't hurt him.

At least, not while she's still out there in the water anyway.

But I'll tell you one thing.

If she puts her foot on land, well now,

that's my dogs' territory.

[WHISTLES]

[DOGS BARKING]

I suggested from the start that one of the operatives should be from my group.

We had no idea that dirty laundry was involved until it was too late.

ANSELL: And at this stage, the revelation will put all of our operations

on the front page of every newspaper in the world.

Well, since you've kept such a close eye on proceedings,

it appears you don't even need a briefing!

Gentlemen, I think the question is where do we go from here?

It seems Reynolds has just thrown a couple of good agents to the dogs.

Agency should put some resources into waterproofing.

Well, the way things are going, I'm ready for you to try and shoot me.

Oh, no, you're not getting off that easy.

Oh, yeah?

[GRUNTS]

Nothing at this point is gonna faze me.

[SIGHS]

[DOGS GROWLING]

[DOGS BARKING]

BOTH: Damn.

[CELL PHONE RINGS]

Jo Buckley.

ANSELL: Tomorrow, all hell will break loose.

Reynolds has called in the Pentagon.

He's already been appointed to lead the investigation.

What do you want me to do?

Disappear.

What will you do?

I can take care of myself.

If it hadn't been for that caped crusader in shorts,

I'd be in the top job by now.

They'll find it hard to trace anything back to me.

I'm too clever for Reynolds.

POLICEMAN ON LOUDSPEAKER: Mr. Ansell, step out of the car!

You're under arrest.

[BEEPS]

Wanker.

PRESIDENT BUSH: You mean that guy in the khaki shorts?

That dude on the Discovery Channel?

I don't care if you have to send in the Marines,

the Air Force, the Rangers.

Just pick up that ball!

STEVE: [WHOOPING] What a steamer!

To think something the size of this,

carelessly discarded by thoughtless people,

could cause so much potential damage

to our innocent, native wildlife.

Please dispose of junk like this wisely.

Okay, Sue, get it!

[BARKS]

[STEVE LAUGHS]

You know, animals everywhere

need all of our help and protection to survive,

if they're going to make it into the future.

Well, this has been one heck of an adventure.

We've tossed a couple of gorgeous snakes,

rescued the most beautiful, gnarly old crocodile

and we taught those pesky poachers

a fair dinkum Steve-o lesson.

What more could a bloke ask for?

Crikey!

MAN: Not yet.

Oh, my eye.

You know, those army blokes seemed pretty upset

about their metal ball.

They reckoned it was more valuable...

Oh, son of a gun.

MAN: Okay.

Of all the gear those blokes get to play with... And again.

MAN: Knock it.

You'd think the last thing they'd...

You'd think the last thing they'd need...

DIRECTOR: Cut.

MAN: Closer, take eight. Knock it.

You know, those army blokes seemed pretty upset

about their metal ball.

They reckoned it was real valuable.

Of all the gear those blokes get to play with,

you'd think a kid's top would be the last thing they'd need.

And that grumpy rancher

has joined the Fauna and Fisheries Department as a volunteer.

But she's still having a little bit of trouble dealing with crocodiles.

And check this out.

The US government gave us those two pesky poachers

to work at Australia Zoo for nothing!

And I reckon, after I give them a full Steve-o education,

we'll be able to return them back to the wild where they belong.

And that crocodile's happy. Real happy.

He's now got himself a couple of gorgeous- looking Sheilas.

Well, we're back to our adventure.

See ya.

Yes! I think I got it! Didn't I get it? Tell me I got it!

♪ I remember when I was young

♪ Me and dad had so much fun

♪ Climbing trees and skipping stones

♪ I had a couple of lizards and a snake of my own

♪ But the biggest kick I've ever got

♪ Was doing a thing called the Crocodile Rock

♪ While the other kids were playing on the dock

♪ We were jumping in the river savin' big ol' crocs, when...

♪ Hold your rocking, something sunk

♪ And how your feet just can't keep still

♪ I'm always catching them every time

♪ And I guess I always will

♪ Oh by crikey! It's Friday night!

♪ Just grab a croc and hold on tight, man

♪ Plan on rocking was the way to put things right

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Suey and Terri by my side

♪ Taking salties for a ride

♪ Up the river to be safe and sound

♪ 'Cause I know a few places that he won't be found

♪ I could tell you about the trick we've got

♪ When we move around a big ol' croc

♪ Wrap the head and watch the tail

♪ That's the way my dad taught me and it never fails

♪ When...

♪ Hold your rocking, something sunk

♪ And how your feet just can't keep still

♪ I'm always catching them every time

♪ And I guess I always will

♪ Oh by crikey! It's Friday night!

♪ Just grab a croc and hold on tight, man

♪ Plan on rocking was the way to put things right

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Put 'em in the air like you just don't care

♪ Crocodile Rock's blowin' up everywhere

♪ If you wanna be down give a shout out, we're non-stop

♪ Crocodile, Crocodile, Crocodile Rock

♪ Everybody in the party, people wanna get it started

♪ People start it up, gotta wait if you want it

♪ Can you ever get this flow? I bet you not, I don't think so

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

Whoo-hoo!

Fifty-nine. Crikey! Take one.

MAN: Mark it. Yeah.

Mark it?

MAN: Put it away.

MAN: All right, and action.

I know how to do it.

Crikey.

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na

♪ Na na na na na

♪ Na na na na na