Original subtitles

Eric Paroissien translation eric.paroissien@gmail.com

Please put it inside.

Pr. Wen, sorry we called you so late.

It's fine, I was still working.

Come in.

Professor Wen, knowing Han Ting, do you think...

she'd want to kill herself?

As far as I know her, I don't think...

she'd do something so extreme.

I know that...

a therapist can't break confidentiality...

you must protect your patient.

But we're here in the name of justice.

Could you somehow...

help us with some insight about your patient.

Since you're referring to a judicial process...

you know that to obtain information...

you need a warrant.

Professor Wen, a life is at stake here.

Confidentiality is crucial for me.

More important than a life?

Forgive me, I'm perplexed...

if you could enlighten me...

why are you so involved Officer Chen?

So keen?

Well, myself I was bullied as a schoolboy...

and sure, that's why...

What's so funny?

You have that sort of aggressiveness...

that's displayed to hide weakness.

Do you see me weak?

Most of the time...

the mental and physical state...

do not match each other.

Even the opposite.

If that was true...

the world champions are weak chickens.

You may have a good point.

Consider the MMA fighters...

it is well known that...

Uriah Hall, Danilko Mill...

and John Dodson, who is less than 1.6 m tall...

were all kids with a weak constitution...

and hence were bullied in their youth.

Professor Wen...

if we could rule out suicide or murder...

we'd conclude Ms. Ting is detained somewhere.

Her condition could get worse, she may even...

experience a total break down.

Is there any rush?

The traditional rice noodles...

require a process...

that makes them taste better.

Do you know how to eat these rice noodles?

You spread the meat on the soup.

The hot soup helps to cook the meat further.

Vegetables should not be heated for too long.

Can't wait for that long...

I need to eat as quickly as possible.

The gang didn't come to class today.

They probably skipped.

Let it cook slowly.

What are you eating?

The food is so tasteless here.

Add some taste.

You can have some too.

What's going on here?

You have time to waste?

The final exam is coming soon.

You're still making trouble.

Go back to your studies.

Right now.

- Ting. - What is that?

What do you want?

I'm begging you.

I beg you, stop making trouble, please.

Tao.

Are you running?

Tao.

Stop.

Don't run.

Had you listened to me from the start...

none of this would have happened.

You saw how Beilei is pushing me...

how can you still believe that?

We have our back against the wall now.

There's no escape.

Don't be afraid, I'm here.

Having fun in England?

I don't like England much.

What? You've had too much fish & chips?

I even went to jail there.

What happened?

I wouldn't know where to start.

Then start from the beginning.

The year I left...

I cut the ties with you...

I was afraid the heat on you would burn me too.

There was a voice in my heart...

always blaming me for being a coward.

My parents had arranged for me to go...

study in England, I followed through.

That way, I thought...

I'd muffle the inner voice.

I pretended I had no choice...

and that a complete change of setting...

would wipe off the past clean.

I clammed up in my world.

I kept clear of everyone...

professors, classmates... everyone.

One morning...

as a prank, my roommates...

while I was asleep...

spread toothpaste on my face.

I woke up in a rage...

I reacted brutally and afterwards...

I didn't even understand myself.

Their prank...

was cheerful and very common among students.

I don't know why I overreacted that way.

Back in China I saw Pr. Wen and told her about the past.

I realized that at that time in England...

I was in an unusual psychological state.

I remember once...

walking by a neighbor's house...

I saw a five or six-year-old girl...

with a piece of tape sealing her mouth.

She was weeping all the time.

I thought her father was sneaky...

that she was a victim of domestic violence.

So I called the police.

The man talked to the police...

explaining the misunderstanding.

He said the little girl had a rare disease...

that required her mouth taped when she slept...

for her to breathe normally.

But again I reacted with rage...

I had an argument with the police.

I told them they were negligent and irresponsible.

At some point I raised my hand...

they took me to the police station.

At that time I was experiencing mood swings.

For some unknown reason...

I couldn't control my emotions.

On a daily basis...

much to my chagrin, I was constantly upset.

And when a situation was getting tense...

I would quickly be out of control.

Don't worry...

I don't bite anymore.

Ting...

do you know...

the night they held me at the station...

who I dreamed of?

Who?

You.

I had a vision of that little girl...

with a tape on her mouth...

stand by her window...

weeping in fear and knocking on the window.

Asking for my help.

I was watching her cry...

and I was powerless.

I imagined her sitting there...

lowering her head, crying...

her shoulders were shaking.

And when she looked up again...

it is your face I saw...

she was you ten years ago.

I then realized that...

there are things in our heart...

that we'll never be able to wipe off.

Many friends advised me...

"Look..."

"you finally passed your bar examination."

"Just work in England as an immigration barrister."

But I knew in my heart...

that only by returning home could I start over...

facing up to my cowardice and desertion.

Ting...

I can tell you what's most dreadful about deserting...

it is that one stops existing.

Because every choice we make...

determines our life path.

Every step we takes...

takes us closer to a destination we chose for ourselves.

Eric Paroissien translation eric.paroissien@gmail.com

Ting...

would you accompany me...

on the graduation trip?

Let me think about it.

Sir, come play with us.

Come on, sir, play with us.

Be careful.

What's the matter? You're not enjoying yourself?

I want the sea to wash away my sadness.

Hey Ting...

why don't you join our group?

This is so nice...

such beauty.

Hey, how about...

you make a picture for me?

No don't, don't.

I'm fine.

It's alright.

I remember you used to love swimming.

Are you afraid of the water now?

Yet, look at you now...

you have grown into a tiger.

Stay put...

don't move.

OK.

Hurry.

I'm going first.

I'm kindly warning you that there's a special gift...

awaiting your friend in class, leave her.

Let's go.

Ting, I have a pain in my tummy.

Your period?

Then what's the matter?

No, I had cold noodles at noon...

then I caught a cold and my stomach is upset.

I'll buy you a hot drink.

No, the drinks are too expensive here.

I can't even drink.

I'll just go to the bathroom.

Alright then, I'm going back to class.

Listen Ting...

Please beware.

Beware of what?

The floor is slippery.

You better be careful...

the bathroom is slippery.

Don't eat that, it's bad.

Who played this prank? This is stupid.

Ms. Ting, go dry yourself, quick.

Sir, I'd like a hot cocoa.

Wear something dry...

put this on.

We'll dry your uniform.

I'll be waiting outside.

Hello.

Hello, sir.

You have hairpins?

Yes, there.

Look...

This white butterfly is the most beautiful.

So delicate.

You know, at school...

what impressed me the most about you?

That I can repair bicycles.

Well, that comes second on the list.

But the first thing...

was your hairpins.

From Monday to Friday...

every day you'd wear a different color.

And sometimes you'd use a pen cap...

Yeah, some days I overslept.

Hey Ting...

Mr. Zhou is coming...

are you decent?

Right.

Can I come in?

Good.

"After so many years..."

"there still was in the album of her mind..."

"the photo of that tin soldiers whispering..."

"standing at the door guarding her."

"His lips..."

"a furry circle..."

"so serious."

Ting please...

I'm sorry...

I didn't mean to offend you.

Mr. Xiao, hang on, you're doing good.

My students are so mischievous, let me help.

Ting...

What is that?

I bumped.

I bumped accidentally.

You bumped?

What kind of marks are these?

- Let me see. - Xiaoxiao.

- Let me see. - Xiaoxiao.

Don't embarrass me.

Is that why you don't wanna swim?

What is this?

It is a dryer.

It works like a clothes dryer.

Hello, Pr. Han.

Well then...

once they're dry, you take them out.

I'll be outside waiting.

The clothes are dried?

That drying box is great invention.

What just happened?

It's my fault, as head of the class I should have...

This is my email address.

It's also my messenger account.

Things you can't tell me...

you can just send me a message.

I'll walk you home after school.

OK.

Do you want water?

Are you just offering water or...

is there something you wanna talk about.

Shouldn't we talk?

Talk about what?

I'm not a freak, you know.

I'm not gonna hurt anyone.

You're hurting yourself.

Isn't that serious?

I don't think I'm hurting myself.

Anesthesia can also hurt...

but it also numbs the pain.

Sleeping pills work only the first half of the night on me.

Late at night...

the same nightmare often wakes me up.

Then I stare at the ceiling...

wondering why I keep on living.

At dawn...

I have that feeling...

Do you know what feeling?

I feel nobody needs me.

But you're wrong.

You remember I told you...

when I came back here, I was in a poor state.

I saw a therapist...

in fact, she's a professor of psychology.

I don't want to see any therapist...

or a professor or whatever.

Like you at first, I was resisting.

But I...

am not like you.

Ting...

you admit it yourself.

This morbid habit is a kind of anesthesia.

Xiaoxiao, you have to stop about this.

What do you mean morbid?

You think it is morbid to run away from danger?

That's right...

I was scared and ran away.

But now...

you are the one escaping.

I am not.

Then stop driving me away.

You can't pretend your issues are yours alone.

Ting.

I will never fail you again.

Even if I had to face death.

And I won't let go of your hand.

Mr. Xiao, let's launch hot-balloon Lanterns.

Yeah, it's great, let's prepare the lanterns.

I want to have one, too.

"Hug each other and cry at night."

"What is that loud sound we cannot understand."

"See the rivers in the mountains..."

"they always run down to escape from them."

"If this world collapsed..."

"and you woke up tomorrow..."

"on that morning..."

"would you still make me a delicious cake..."

"and let me sleep peacefully."

"You're a remote island embracing me..."

"always warm..."

By the way, Ms. Ting...

which room do you prefer?

This one or the other?

I'm fine either way.

Then come in.

Come in.

You have a Mexican post cactus.

Oh...

you seem to know about plants.

I lived near the botanical garden.

I used to spend my idle time there.

- Careful. - It's fine.

Plants with thorns make me feel safe.

Eric Paroissien translation eric.paroissien@gmail.com