Original subtitles

"The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars

but in ourselves, that we are underlings."

Whoo! Crowd go wild.

So, who is it you're playing again?

Oh, well, that's not my line, I am, uh...

"fourth toga from the left". Ahem.

But the director did say that I stab Caesar with aplomb.

I thought Julius Caesar was stabbed with a knife?

You wouldn't get far with a plum, would ya?

You, sir, are a philistine.

No I'm not! I've never been to the Middle East.

Oh, hide the swag, the Feds are here.

Ignore him. Come in, come in. Have a seat.

- Hello. - It's not official business, Frank.

This is my friend Poonam, she needs your help.

"Bring mead, my good man".

Anyone for tea? The kettle's just boiled.

How can we help you?

I'd like you to look into to the death of my friend.

Haroon Malik.

Right, uh how did he die?

He was crushed by falling carpets.

My dad, Mr Raja, owns Freddie Freeman's Factory Flooring...

Oh, the carpet stores. Right!

I just...

I just thought they were owned by someone called... well, Freddie.

Well, McDonalds isn't owned by somebody called Ronald.

Poonam came up with that marketing campaign.

Did you? Oh!

♪ I live for carpets, I do ♪

So you don't think it was an accident?

No, I don't.

I was supposed to meet Haroon for lunch.

He was excited, said he had something to tell me.

Then the night he died, he sent me this message.

"It's not what you think. Your dad's safe. Poonam".

When Haroon landed a job at the company

I asked him if he could keep an eye on my dad for me.

He said he would.

Were you not in touch with him yourself?

I haven't seen him or my family for... nearly four years.

Why's that?

When I came back from uni, my dad was working way too hard.

I suggested to my sisters that we take on more responsibility.

They agreed.

We had a family meeting, and when I brought it up

my dad accused me of trying to steal the company.

Parthi and Pia sided with him and I was kicked out of the house.

I tried to get in contact a few times over the years...

but he refused to talk to me.

All I ever wanted was what was best for my dad

and the family business.

And you think whatever Haroon was gonna tell you

got him killed?

I know it sounds crazy but that message was so strange.

Now, I never thought my dad was in any danger.

Plus there's no sign of Haroon's phone.

- Did the police pick it up? - No.

But he must have had it because he sent me the message.

What's Keeler saying?

Coroner ruled accidental death. He doesn't wanna know.

Do you think your sisters are involved?

To die the same night he sent the message...

Haroon's mum and I just want to put our minds at rest.

Where did the accident happen?

The head office warehouse.

OK, we'll head over there and have a nose around.

Sebastian, if you could check the local stores

see what the staff are saying.

I'd like to come as well. The staff might talk to me.

- Be my guest. - Would you like me to come?

Oh, don't worry, we'll be fine.

Phone.

Thank you.

Sebastian, you might wanna get changed.

Excuse me, Parthi Raja?

- Just there. - Thank you.

Uh, Parthi Raja?

Could we have a word about Haroon Malik?

- Who are you? - Oh, sorry. Yeah, we're Shakespeare and...

Shakespeare and Hathaway, Private Investigators.

Haroon's mum has asked us to look into his death.

It's already been thoroughly investigated.

Yeah, she's grieving.

Sometimes it's hard to accept the facts, isn't it?

- She just needs reassurance. - Yeah, and we won't take long. Promise.

Quite a set-up you've got here.

Do you mind if we have a look around while we talk?

This is, um...

Where it happened?

Haroon was stood next to the rolls when they toppled.

The report said a chain snapped?

Mm, a stupid mistake.

There were too many rolls for the size of the chain.

And he wasn't found until the next morning?

Everyone had left for the day.

Wow...

so he was all alone.

I mean, that's a horrible way to go, isn't it?

That's my biggest fear, that is.

I thought it was drowning?

It is.

Drowning, alone.

Do you mind if I take a few...?

Um...

My mum gets all her carpets from your place.

Yeah, cos she... ♪ Lives for carpets, she does ♪

Excuse me.

Wish we could understand what they're saying.

We need to get a look inside Haroon's office.

I'll nip back, see if I can have a word with Mr Sunshine.

OK.

Uncle Vikram always feels his problems take priority.

Family, eh?

Actually he's been with the company from the beginning.

We call him "uncle" out of respect.

Actually, it would be really useful

if we could look at Haroon's office, wouldn't it?

Would that be OK?

There really isn't anything to see.

The few personal effects he had were sent home.

Yeah. We just need to cross the "I"s and dot the "T"s.

Just out of respect for his mum.

- Thanks. - Uh, Lu...

You haven't got a power bank, have ya?

- Oh, yeah. It's in the car. - Thanks, sorry.

I'll catch you up.

Yeah, I've switched to wood, big mistake.

Um, I bet the carpets at your place are gorgeous.

I am gonna switch back.

Is it, um...

is it alright if I have a look around?

What is it you're looking for?

Oh, you know...

Maybe a nice shag pile, something hard-wearing for the hall.

I meant...

Oh, yes... right.

Well, we've got to write this report

so we just need to make sure we've ticked all the boxes.

You know. Looked round the office, tick. Asked a few questions, tick.

For example, where were you the night he died?

Uh, I was at home watching TV with my sister.

Nice.

Oh, I did have one more question, actually.

Kitchen - vinyl or tile?

Because I keep watching all these make-over programmes

and it's all about polished concrete, have you noticed?

I don't watch them.

No, ah, let me guess...

more of a soaps girl?

Look, is this gonna take long?

Oh...

Yes.

OK, come to my office.

- Are you done here? - Yeah, nearly. Really nearly.

I just need to go and attend to something, I'll be back shortly.

OK.

Hello.

I wonder if I could have a quick word?

No English.

Sorry?

- No English. - No English?

No English.

Really? No English.

No English.

Fair enough.

This has only closed recently.

How can you tell?

Ahem...

Ash and I may have passed the odd 4F's store on a Sunday drive.

What a romantic way to spend a Sunday afternoon.

The carpet shops of Warwickshire.

- And the East Midlands. - Of course.

How delightful.

Ash is a sucker for carpet shops.

Aren't we all.

What are you doing?

Sorry, I was just, um...

I was just admiring your picture.

Is that the family?

- Yeah. - Yeah...

See, I'm an only child.

So I've always wondered what it'd be like to have sisters.

We're really quite busy.

Let me guess.

This one here on the left, that's you isn't it?

That's Pia.

I'm on the right, Poonam in the middle.

Shall we?

Ah, yeah, no, I can see that now.

Are your sisters around?

No.

Well, it's a shame cos it would be nice, you know

just to have a chat to them, just to maybe help us a little bit with our report.

Pia's on annual leave.

Poonam doesn't work with the company.

What about your dad?

He very rarely comes in these days.

- Ah, hello. Everything alright? - Yep.

Look at this.

Which one of these do you think is Parthi? You'll never guess.

One on the right.

Shall we go?

Good luck with the report.

- Thanks. - Thank you, thanks.

Uncle Vikram claimed he couldn't speak English.

What? Not even to your standard?

I saw him reading his clipboard.

He's definitely hiding something.

What did you make of Parthi?

Hm... She's a cold fish.

Doesn't make her a killer.

Sebastian, anything?

The store we went to was closed.

Closed, or closed down?

Closed down, empty as a understudy matinee on a rainy Tuesday.

Hmph. Well, try the others.

Oh, Mr Hathaway, we are one step ahead of you.

Out of 12 stores, only one is still open.

Why are they moving all these carpets?

And what are my sisters up to?

Poonam, could you help get Haroon's personal effects

and bring 'em to the office?

Yeah, of course.

Thank you.

Hiya, I need your help.

Lunch delivery!

Oh, I thought she said, "Just a few personal belongings".

Mrs Malik couldn't bring herself to show us what was what

so we brought it all.

This is really hard.

Yeah.

So... what have you found out?

The staff had heard of the accident, but none of them knew Haroon personally.

They were worried about the store closures though.

It's all happened very quickly.

Well, if there carpets aren't going to their own stores, where are they going?

Maybe they're selling them online.

If they are, it's not under the 4F's banner.

How did you meet Haroon?

We met at university.

He was going out with one of my housemates.

We just all started hanging out.

Alright, so you two weren't...

No, not like that.

I'm done. Nothing!

OK, so you two go find out where the carpets are going.

Follow one of the delivery trucks.

Another lunch on the go.

It's time we talked to Mr Raja and Pia.

Let me know how Dad is.

Make sure he's OK.

Of course, yeah.

There's an inscription.

"My dearest Haroon, my love for you knows no bounds. P"

Mm, what "P" is that do you think?

"Have more than thou showest, speak less than thou knowest".

Uh-buh-buh...

- Mm... - But you...

"If money go before, all ways do lie open."

Quoting Shakespeare doesn't make you cultured, you know.

Works for Sebastian.

Yeah, well he doesn't read it from a book.

Hah!

"For which of my bad parts didst thou first fall in love with me?"

- None. - Come on!

Are you the PIs?

Yes, that's us.

Have you got five minutes?

Yeah.

Thank you.

Well, as far as we're concerned

the police and HSE have done a thorough investigation.

Mrs Malik is still grieving.

Yeah, I can understand that.

Haroon was a beautiful human being.

I know this is a bit of a personal question

but, um, were you and Haroon romantically involved?

No, we were colleagues and I would like to think friends.

What about your sister?

Parthi?

No.

- Not at all. - Seem very sure about that.

I know my sister.

I'm sorry. Would you mind if I used your toilet?

No, just down the hall, first door on the right.

Thank you.

Do you mind if I? They're my favourite sweets.

- Uh... - Thanks.

Thanks.

- So, what do you do there? - Head of sales.

So Haroon would have been one of your associates?

He was. There was so much we were going to do.

I imagine sales are pretty stressful at the moment.

Uh, sales is always stressful.

Especially with so many of your stores closing down.

Uh, that's because of restructuring.

You know "youngest" is code for "favourite".

Yeah, I think my sisters realised that as well.

With Pia, it was always dead legs and head locks.

With Parthi, it was more psychological.

The joys of sisterhood!

I had Vi'.

She's always been there for me.

We used to get into so much trouble when we were younger.

I remember once she took the blame for me when I stole a copy of Mizz Magazine.

Oh, I remember that!

I think some of the girls at school used to read it.

So Viola had a nefarious past?

Well, actually, it was probably me that was the nefarious one.

Maybe that's why Vi' joined the force.

She thinks the world of you, you know.

I can't say it's entirely escaped my notice.

Oh, there's one now.

Ahem.

Who the hell are you?

These are delicious, are you sure you don't mind?

Uh, no.

Oh.

I don't get much chance to watch TV these days.

Me neither.

Except for the night that Haroon died.

Get out!

Uh, Dad?

- Get out! - Yes, I was just looking for the loo, sorry.

It's... It's not here, is it?

- Get out! - Dad, uh, Dad, this is...

Who the hell are you?

- Mr Raja... - I don't care who you are!

Just get out!

Come on Frank.

- Get out! - Ooh!

- Thanks for these. - Yeah... oh.

Dad, it's OK.

- Huh? - It's OK.

There was just this one locked cabinet in the study

so I found the key, was just about to open it

and he walked in.

I had to just leave. Take it with me.

What, the filing cabinet?

Yeah, it's amazing what you can fit in a handbag.

There was only one cabinet that was locked

and they'd hidden the key, which made me think, well...

what else are they hiding, then?

You know, we need to get in there, we need to see what's in it.

How are you gonna do that?

I don't know, actually.

Well, come on, don't just sit there.

You gotta drop me off.

Oh, have I? Oh, OK!

Taxi for Mr Hathaway, is it?

Hey, hey.

"And though she be little, she is fierce."

It's you. Tiny fierce woman! Grrrrr, eh?

Get out.

Argh!

This is one of our biggest rivals.

What are they doing here?

Let's find out.

- Just like that? - Of course.

I will be...

Cornelius, a slightly harried junior doctor

who's rather annoyed that you've brought him here on my day off.

And I'll be Miranda, your social-climbing wife

who is very house proud.

Enchanté.

On y va.

...and then, he was chased off by a bear.

Oh, I'll, uh... see you later.

By a bear! Eh?

Why didn't you want to talk to me?

Do I have to?

Not technically, no.

Oh, then I choose not to.

Might want to talk to her, though.

Is this your car, sir?

Yes.

I think there's more to this than meets the eye.

Look, I can't control what you think.

Oh, I've got a suspicious mind.

When someone refuses to talk to me, I think they're hiding something.

Do you know anything about Haroon's death?

He was in the warehouse at night when he shouldn't have been.

The carpets fell.

- You don't seem very bothered. - I didn't know the guy.

Did you secure the carpets then, did ya?

If I had, they wouldn't have fallen.

Look, can I go now?

Your front off-side's a little low, but the rest are fine.

Thank you, officer.

I know there's something you're not telling me.

Poonam kept them busy looking for the perfect shade of mushroom

while I found an invoice for those four fiendish Fs.

Freddie Freemans Factory Flooring.

♪ I live for carpets, I do ♪

No, but seriously, she said it would be impossible to sell

at these prices and turn a profit.

Why would they be selling at a loss?

If their carpets are so cheap

why don't they sell 'em in their own stores?

Maybe they're wholesaling 'em?

Why not just say that?

When I mentioned the store closures, Pia seemed thrown.

Do you think Haroon found the answer and that's why he's dead?

If he did, odds are it was in the warehouse.

And we still haven't found the phone.

Or why he sent that message.

Yeah, I mean, it's not like Mr Raja was in any danger.

So are we saying the sisters killed him to stop him

exposing whatever it is they're up to?

Well, that's a theory, yeah. We haven't got any proof yet.

And then there's the inscription.

Did you see the way Pia reacted every time we mentioned Haroon?

- Unrequited love? - Maybe.

It would help if we knew who wrote the inscription.

Is Poonam coming back?

She is, she's just parking.

Do you think Poonam wrote it?

She has a boyfriend.

- Never stopped me. - Or me.

- Or me! - Ha!

Which is why we need to get a sample of her handwriting...

take her out of the frame.

OK, here's what we're gonna do.

Sebastian, I want you to find out

where their super cheap carpets are coming from.

Oh, I'll go back to Mr Raja's.

If he's calmed down, I might be able to get in that cabinet. I have no idea how!

I'll go back to the warehouse, try and get a look at Parthi's office.

- Hiya. - Hiya.

How's my dad?

Yeah, he seemed safe.

- Good. - Oh, yeah, we met Uncle Vikram.

Oh, great.

He didn't seem very happy about us being there.

His bark is a lot worse than his bite.

I've known him since forever.

- Taught me how to drive a forklift. - Really?

- Yeah. - Oh, while you're here

would you mind just writing down exactly

what was in that text message from Haroon?

Thanks.

It's just that we found this.

- And you thought it was me? - Well, it's signed "P" so...

we had to check.

Do you recognise the handwriting?

It looks familiar, could be one of my sisters.

I can't say for sure.

Sorry.

Hello!

Hello, Mr Raja.

Hello, you must be one of Poonam's friends.

Uh, she'll be out in a minute.

Why don't you answer your phone?

Forget about that.

The key is missing.

Which key?

Which one do you think?

Those investigators turned up, they had a run in with Dad.

Hello, you must be one of Poonam's friends.

Well, I just thought I'd get a bit of gardening in

before the girls come back home from school.

Are you not a bit chilly out here?

Hm?

Yes, I've almost finished here.

OK.

I think I'll take a nap.

Oh, OK.

Oh!

I better clean myself up.

The wife will give me hell

if she... if she thought I was taking mud into the house.

Oh, dear.

Oh, dear.

- What have you done with Dad. - I left him at home.

Why did you do that?

You need to get back there and make sure he doesn't do any damage.

And what about the key?

Forget about the key for now, just get back home.

What?

OK, I'm coming.

I think I ought to have a nap.

OK.

Oh, uh...

You better go sit down. Hm?

- Poonam will be down in a minute. - Oh, right.

Will do.

And what the hell do you think you're doing?

Uh... um...

- Searching for the truth. - Yeah?

Looks more like theft and trespass to me.

Don't do anything you're gonna regret.

Maybe I won't regret it.

Maybe I'll say it was self-defence.

You. You taught Poonam how to drive the forklift truck.

- How do you know Poonam? - Put the hammer down, I'll tell ya.

Haroon was her friend.

She hired us to find out what happened.

She thought a lot of you, you know.

Well, she was a good girl, Poonam.

I didn't like that she left.

She didn't leave.

She was forced out by Parthi and Pia.

There's something you're not telling me?

I found Haroon snooping in Mr Raja's office...

so I went straight and told Parthi.

It was that night that he had his "accident".

And you don't think it's an accident?

Everyone said it was, I...

I gave the girls the benefit of the doubt because of their dad.

Look...

we can find out what really happened.

But, I need your help.

Why would I help you?

You'd be helping Poonam.

What are you looking for anyway?

Whatever it is they've been shredding.

- Why? - Because those are the documents

I think Haroon was searching for.

Well, you're not gonna find anything in here.

But I might have some old paperwork that could help.

Yeah, are you sure?

It's perfect.

- This is very exciting. - It's so exciting.

"When we are born, we cry that we are come to this great stage of fools."

Blimey, ever heard of the phrase, "going equipped"?

Maybe I should put this back.

And this.

OK. Huh!

So "safe" doesn't mean "safe" as in, not in danger

it means "safe" as in, somewhere to keep your jewellery.

But I still can't figure out the "Poonam" bit at the end of the message.

Hm...

Are you delivering chocolates, or summat?

Eh?

This...

Come on, let's go.

- Uh... - What?

It's cold outside.

And it looks good.

Can I...

come?

These have been in the bottom of my drawer since I left.

Let's hope they haven't changed the locks or codes.

Well, there's only one way to find out.

It used to be my Dad's date of birth.

Try someone else.

Try Parthi.

Look, we'll have to hurry now.

Shhh!

Happier times.

Um, how many goes do you think we get at this?

I'd say three, but whatever you do, hurry up!

Security's bound to have called it in.

That was Parthi's date of birth.

Try your dad's.

- Come on! - No, stop, stop, stop! Actually...

"It's not what you think, your dad's safe. Poonam"

Try yours.

Now what do we do?

I don't know. "Poonam..."

"Poonam", why "Poonam"?

Try this...

Try putting in the numbers...

if I spell out Poonam on the keypad.

Hurry up!

7-6-6...

6-2-6...

Yes!

What's the betting this is Haroon's phone?

And I bet he's put the evidence we need on it.

I'm taking this.

You can't, they'll know.

I don't care, it's going with me.

The safe!

Not your hand, not your hand!

Come on.

Long time, Poonam.

I should have known it was you behind all this.

That's theft.

It's mine as much as yours.

I'm gonna have you arrested for theft and trespass.

In fact, anything you've taken from these premises is our property.

We know what you're doing.

And we have the evidence.

- Evidence of what? - We found Haroon's phone.

I want everything.

Do you know, you're absolutely right. It does all belong to you.

Including this.

Where did you get that?

We found it amongst Haroon's possessions.

You're a big fan, aren't ya? I saw that quote on your office wall.

But maybe Pia needs to brush up on the Bard, huh?

No.

Pia, don't take it!

Interesting inscription in the front.

You told me I was getting too close.

To back off.

Spend more time with Dad.

And all that time you wanted him all to yourself.

It wasn't like that.

You killed him.

You said you caught him stealing documents. That you were protecting us.

The night he died...

you told everyone that you were with me.

But you weren't.

You were here killing my Haroon!

Stop, argh!

Hold that!

Vi'! They killed Haroon, Vi'!

Why did you do it, Parthi?

Hm?

And to let Dad take the fall?

He's in cloud cuckoo land, he doesn't know any better.

- But he's our dad. - Our dad?

All you get out of him is "Poonam this" and "Poonam that".

I was the one who did all the work. I made all the sacrifices.

And I was gonna be left all on my own.

- Well, you had your sister. - Her?

What would I want to do with that idiot?

I've spent my life looking after this family

don't I deserve something?

Don't I deserve love?

Is that why you killed Haroon?

- Because he didn't love you back? - Yes.

PC Deakin, what the hell is going on?

Ah, Sarge, I've arrested Parthi Raja over here for the murder of Haroon Malik.

And alongside her sister, Pia for fraud.

Any evidence?

Other than Frank Hathaway's word for it?

We've got evidence, Sarge.

They were bankrupting their father's business by diverting funds into an offshore account.

- An offshore account? - Yeah.

There was two million pounds in a company called Puck Consultants.

And they were invoicing the 4Fs for non-existent work.

Their suppliers are owed thousands.

As fast as the carpets were coming in the front door

they were selling them out the back for a cut rate price.

Pocketing the cash.

They heard Parthi confess to the murder of Haroon Malik

and it looks like he was gathering evidence on his phone of the fraud.

She killed him to keep him quiet.

And Pia's admitted to giving her sister a false alibi

for the night he died

and I've got a recording of that on my phone.

Put 'em in the van.

- Did you two break into here? - Actually, it's my dad's company.

I let them in.

You want to pick your friends more wisely.

He'll ruin your career like he ruined his own.

Ah...

"I was seeking for a fool, when I found you".

Let's go.

- Take care. - Thank you.

OK?

Eh?

Eh? It was out of my head, that.

No book.

- Cultured. - Hm.

Dad?

Dad?

Poonam!

Dad!

Oh!

Where have you been?

Huh? You should be staying at home more.

You're not going out again, are you?

I'm not going anywhere, Dad.

Good.

Good.

These are your friends.

- Hello, Vi', love. - Hello, Mr Raja.

Yeah. Yes, I hope you two girls haven't been getting into a lot of trouble.

Eh?

Are they your friends too?

We're just going.

Betta!

Oh, look. He's waited up for us!

Fool!

You haven't been arrested then?

Unfortunately.

Did you find anything?

Not only did we find something

Parthi and Pia are in custody.

Yeah, and Poonam is with her dad.

Ah, I'm delighted for her.

Are you enjoying that?

"A man may part with time and coin but bread is forever sacred."

That's not Shakespeare.

Isn't it?

No.

Are you sure about that?

Yeah, I...

Where's my complete works?

Who really said that?

Me, just now.

Do you want a bit?

He's checking.