Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:15,573 --> 00:00:19,243
'No pieces of the body
have been found,
2
00:00:19,275 --> 00:00:23,280
'and the authorities say,
"Sea monsters aren't real."'
3
00:00:25,716 --> 00:00:29,420
Ahoy! And salutations!
4
00:00:29,452 --> 00:00:32,890
My name is Captain Seafield.
5
00:00:32,923 --> 00:00:36,294
'The authorities say,
"Sea monsters aren't real.
6
00:00:36,326 --> 00:00:39,729
'"Or for that matter,
lake monsters."'
7
00:00:39,762 --> 00:00:41,498
One month ago,
8
00:00:41,531 --> 00:00:44,534
me and a fellow
ship captain of mine
9
00:00:44,567 --> 00:00:46,903
ventured out
on a morning fishing trip
10
00:00:46,936 --> 00:00:50,440
upon the great tides
of Lake Michigan.
11
00:00:50,473 --> 00:00:54,644
As we cast our lines,
suddenly from out of nowhere,
12
00:00:54,677 --> 00:00:58,949
a Hellish sea monster crept up
from the shallow depths,
13
00:00:58,982 --> 00:01:01,218
boarded our vessel,
14
00:01:01,252 --> 00:01:04,322
and killed my associate.
15
00:01:04,355 --> 00:01:06,624
It then dragged him underwater
16
00:01:06,656 --> 00:01:09,560
and vanished
into the murky abyss.
17
00:01:12,629 --> 00:01:15,865
The victim here was my father.
18
00:01:15,899 --> 00:01:18,868
'The authorities say,
"Sea monsters aren't real.
19
00:01:18,902 --> 00:01:21,605
'"Or for that matter,
lake monsters."'
20
00:01:21,638 --> 00:01:25,242
And so, I have hired
a group of specialists
21
00:01:25,275 --> 00:01:28,712
to help me locate the beast
and murder it.
22
00:01:40,891 --> 00:01:43,995
'Sean Shaughnessy,
weapons expert.
23
00:01:49,066 --> 00:01:51,534
'Nedge Pepsi, sonar individual.'
24
00:02:00,843 --> 00:02:02,479
'And Dick Flynn,
25
00:02:02,513 --> 00:02:05,049
'former officer at the Nautical
Athletes Adventure Yunit.
26
00:02:05,081 --> 00:02:08,618
'Sometimes referred to
as the "N.A.V.Y."'
27
00:02:08,651 --> 00:02:10,487
And there it is!
28
00:02:11,655 --> 00:02:13,925
The team of the century!
29
00:02:19,629 --> 00:02:22,599
- Sean Shaughnessy.
- How big is this monster?
30
00:02:22,633 --> 00:02:24,435
Excellent question.
31
00:02:24,467 --> 00:02:26,304
This is a lion.
32
00:02:27,570 --> 00:02:29,806
This is a tiger.
33
00:02:31,008 --> 00:02:32,743
It's as big as a lion.
34
00:02:38,514 --> 00:02:40,484
What does it look like?
35
00:02:47,957 --> 00:02:49,826
Monstrous.
36
00:02:49,860 --> 00:02:51,462
Right?
37
00:02:51,495 --> 00:02:52,997
Do we have a boat?
38
00:02:53,030 --> 00:02:55,032
It's pronounced "pontoon".
39
00:02:55,064 --> 00:02:56,901
But we shan't be needing it
for anything other
40
00:02:56,933 --> 00:02:58,401
than general seafaring
41
00:02:58,435 --> 00:02:59,870
as our hunt will be boat-less,
42
00:02:59,902 --> 00:03:02,639
for, you see,
our monster resides...
43
00:03:04,707 --> 00:03:06,343
- ...here.
- Is that...?
44
00:03:06,377 --> 00:03:08,379
- Lake Michigan.
- We know it's Lake Michigan.
45
00:03:08,412 --> 00:03:09,813
It's the name of the movie.
46
00:03:13,717 --> 00:03:16,921
Yes, but more precisely
it lives here,
47
00:03:16,954 --> 00:03:18,923
off the shore
of my lighthouse island.
48
00:03:18,955 --> 00:03:20,790
I tell you, we weren't
one fathom in the water
49
00:03:20,824 --> 00:03:22,626
when the beast slew my father.
50
00:03:22,658 --> 00:03:24,894
Wait, I thought you said
he was thrown overboard
51
00:03:24,927 --> 00:03:26,496
on a fishing trip.
52
00:03:28,765 --> 00:03:30,700
Well, he was, by the beast.
53
00:03:30,734 --> 00:03:33,737
And that is precisely
why we must find and kill
54
00:03:33,770 --> 00:03:35,405
the Lake Michigan Monster!
55
00:03:35,438 --> 00:03:38,975
Right. But you said you weren't
one fathom out on the lake
56
00:03:39,008 --> 00:03:40,110
before the monster struck?
57
00:03:40,144 --> 00:03:42,445
- Well, we weren't.
- One fathom?
58
00:03:42,479 --> 00:03:45,649
You were one fathom off the
shore for a fishing trip?
59
00:03:45,681 --> 00:03:48,452
- Yes!
- You know how long a fathom is?
60
00:03:59,430 --> 00:04:01,064
It's six feet.
61
00:04:02,132 --> 00:04:04,001
Bah!
62
00:04:04,033 --> 00:04:06,870
F.A.T.H.O.M.:
Facultative Aquatic Taffrail
63
00:04:06,903 --> 00:04:09,038
Haliographic
Opinion Measurement.
64
00:04:09,072 --> 00:04:10,775
I'm not sure that's right.
65
00:04:10,807 --> 00:04:14,544
What did you take the boat out
and instantaneously run aground?
66
00:04:14,578 --> 00:04:17,180
- Then cast your fishing lines?
- What else is in that podium?
67
00:04:17,213 --> 00:04:19,149
Well, maybe that's precisely
what happened!
68
00:04:19,182 --> 00:04:22,653
Now why the hell is that
so hard to grasp? Oh, God...
69
00:04:22,685 --> 00:04:25,656
Hey, what's going on here?
Seafield!
70
00:04:25,689 --> 00:04:28,759
For the love of God,
stop using my classroom!
71
00:04:28,791 --> 00:04:30,727
Expelled means expelled!
72
00:05:08,966 --> 00:05:12,002
Lake Michigan...
this is where it all happens.
73
00:05:24,848 --> 00:05:27,685
Here's the deal.
74
00:05:27,718 --> 00:05:29,687
This is the beach.
There's the water.
75
00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:31,021
Here we are right now.
76
00:05:31,053 --> 00:05:33,056
Nedge has set up the sonar
station over there.
77
00:05:33,089 --> 00:05:35,892
When Nedge flips the switch,
Sean Shaughnessy will give Dick
78
00:05:35,925 --> 00:05:37,694
his monster-killing weapon
of choice.
79
00:05:37,728 --> 00:05:40,898
Then, Dick, you're going to walk
ten paces to the kayak, get in,
80
00:05:40,930 --> 00:05:44,000
row yourself out to sea,
dive in, and begin your search.
81
00:05:44,033 --> 00:05:46,036
Back on land, Sean Shaughnessy
will be lookout,
82
00:05:46,069 --> 00:05:49,607
while Nedge and I watch for
any blips on the Sonar 2000.
83
00:05:49,639 --> 00:05:53,843
It shall be known as:
Operation Annihilation!
84
00:06:31,213 --> 00:06:35,052
One. Two. Three.
85
00:06:35,084 --> 00:06:38,555
Four. Five. Six.
86
00:06:38,588 --> 00:06:40,891
Seven. Eight...
87
00:06:46,762 --> 00:06:48,132
Nine.
88
00:06:49,031 --> 00:06:50,600
Uh, ten!
89
00:07:01,877 --> 00:07:02,979
He's in.
90
00:07:27,370 --> 00:07:30,040
Has he found anything?
91
00:07:33,276 --> 00:07:35,045
Negative.
92
00:07:40,117 --> 00:07:41,919
Go give him a hand,
Sean Shaughnessy.
93
00:07:41,951 --> 00:07:43,153
Right.
94
00:07:48,324 --> 00:07:50,226
That's my weapons expert.
95
00:08:06,742 --> 00:08:10,647
So, Seafield, what's it like
being a ship captain?
96
00:08:14,850 --> 00:08:16,353
- Seafield.
- What?
97
00:08:16,386 --> 00:08:18,689
How do you like being
a ship captain?
98
00:08:18,721 --> 00:08:20,390
I'm not a ship captain.
99
00:08:20,423 --> 00:08:22,825
What? I thought that was
kind of your thing.
100
00:08:25,696 --> 00:08:28,399
- I hope Dick's okay.
- Did you get it?
101
00:08:28,432 --> 00:08:30,201
Nope. False alarm.
102
00:08:40,342 --> 00:08:42,312
You almost shot me!
103
00:08:44,947 --> 00:08:46,683
There's nothing down there,
Seafield.
104
00:08:46,716 --> 00:08:48,885
Damn. Well, you all tried
your best.
105
00:08:48,918 --> 00:08:50,954
Let's regroup at my place
and drink bourbon.
106
00:08:55,057 --> 00:08:57,093
Nedge, go wake up
Sean Shaughnessy.
107
00:09:39,068 --> 00:09:41,404
You know, I really thought
that plan would work.
108
00:09:41,437 --> 00:09:44,240
Oh, well, a marginal setback.
109
00:09:44,274 --> 00:09:45,908
What's our next plan of attack?
110
00:09:45,942 --> 00:09:48,312
Ha-ha! Attack.
111
00:09:48,345 --> 00:09:51,281
Spoken like a true
weapons expert.
112
00:09:51,313 --> 00:09:53,382
That's why I got you,
Sean Shaughnessy.
113
00:09:53,416 --> 00:09:56,286
Violence is always on your mind.
114
00:09:56,318 --> 00:09:58,288
Much like that
of the creature's.
115
00:09:58,321 --> 00:10:02,893
With a gun or a knife
we must end this monster's life.
116
00:10:08,831 --> 00:10:10,867
So what's our next plan
of attack?
117
00:10:10,900 --> 00:10:14,170
- Who wants fish sticks?
- Oh, here we go!
118
00:10:14,203 --> 00:10:15,872
Martha, you spoil us!
119
00:10:15,905 --> 00:10:18,174
Now, now, even
the Team of the Century
120
00:10:18,207 --> 00:10:19,976
has to eat once in a while.
121
00:10:20,009 --> 00:10:22,011
- Thank you.
- She's right, you know.
122
00:10:22,044 --> 00:10:26,415
Food gives us energy, and energy
is what, Sean Shaughnessy?
123
00:10:26,448 --> 00:10:28,317
Uh, energy is...
124
00:10:28,350 --> 00:10:31,421
- A good thing!
- Energy is a good thing, idiot.
125
00:10:31,453 --> 00:10:33,356
Martha, did you happen
to bring the ketchup?
126
00:10:33,389 --> 00:10:36,156
Did I happen to bring ketchup?
127
00:10:36,158 --> 00:10:38,795
Martha! She knows me too well.
128
00:10:38,828 --> 00:10:42,832
Okay, now you all enjoy. Plates
and napkins are here in the bar.
129
00:10:42,865 --> 00:10:44,433
Thank you, thank you.
130
00:10:44,466 --> 00:10:46,336
And don't forget, tomorrow
you've got that field trip.
131
00:10:46,369 --> 00:10:49,907
- Alright. Alright, Martha.
- Thank you.
132
00:10:49,940 --> 00:10:51,108
Martha.
133
00:10:51,140 --> 00:10:52,876
My wife.
134
00:10:54,110 --> 00:10:56,046
Ah, very nice.
135
00:10:56,078 --> 00:10:59,081
- Nedge?
- Oh, yeah?
136
00:10:59,115 --> 00:11:00,551
- Come on.
- What?
137
00:11:00,583 --> 00:11:02,452
Let's hear it.
138
00:11:03,854 --> 00:11:05,422
- Ah...
- Uh...
139
00:11:05,455 --> 00:11:07,424
Oh! Uh...
140
00:11:07,456 --> 00:11:10,494
- To the Team of the Century!
- Ah, very nice.
141
00:11:13,529 --> 00:11:15,966
Not bad.
142
00:11:15,999 --> 00:11:17,267
- Oh!
- Urgh!
143
00:11:17,299 --> 00:11:19,302
Shit, that's bad!
144
00:11:19,336 --> 00:11:22,438
- Urgh! No one else try that!
- No one would do that.
145
00:11:22,471 --> 00:11:24,240
Urgh! I need ketchup!
146
00:11:24,274 --> 00:11:27,410
So, here's the new deal.
147
00:11:27,443 --> 00:11:29,545
This is the beach again.
There's the water again.
148
00:11:29,578 --> 00:11:31,180
Here we are right now again.
149
00:11:31,214 --> 00:11:33,317
Nedge has set up the sonar
station over there again.
150
00:11:33,350 --> 00:11:34,951
When Nedge flips
the switch again,
151
00:11:34,985 --> 00:11:36,186
Sean Shaughnessy will give Dick
152
00:11:36,219 --> 00:11:37,888
his monster-killing weapon
of choice again.
153
00:11:37,921 --> 00:11:40,524
Then, you'll walk ten paces
to the kayak, get in again,
154
00:11:40,557 --> 00:11:42,491
row yourself out to the sea
again, dive in again,
155
00:11:42,524 --> 00:11:44,093
and begin your search again.
156
00:11:44,126 --> 00:11:45,361
Back on land, Sean Shaughnessy
will be lookout again,
157
00:11:45,394 --> 00:11:48,598
while Nedge and I watch for any
blips on the Sonar 2000 again.
158
00:11:48,631 --> 00:11:54,237
Except this time, it shall be
known as: Operation Nauty Lady.
159
00:11:57,039 --> 00:11:59,342
- Why, though?
- Why what?
160
00:11:59,375 --> 00:12:02,144
I mean, I like the name
and everything,
161
00:12:02,177 --> 00:12:04,047
I think it's really clever.
162
00:12:04,080 --> 00:12:06,617
But what does it have to do
with anything?
163
00:12:13,023 --> 00:12:15,091
Whoa, hey!
Where are my clothes?
164
00:12:17,427 --> 00:12:20,096
You must be naked
for the nauty lady!
165
00:12:20,129 --> 00:12:21,631
What the hell does that mean?
166
00:12:21,664 --> 00:12:24,300
Last night I finished my fish
sticks and I got to thinking.
167
00:12:24,333 --> 00:12:26,636
What if this monster is a lady?
168
00:12:26,669 --> 00:12:29,005
Well, then, naturally
she'd be attracted
169
00:12:29,038 --> 00:12:30,673
to a naked swimming man.
170
00:12:30,706 --> 00:12:32,942
- Naturally.
- I didn't sign up for this!
171
00:12:32,975 --> 00:12:36,279
- Where are my clothes?
- Oh, and by the way...
172
00:12:36,312 --> 00:12:40,116
...I forgot to hand out these
last night.
173
00:12:40,149 --> 00:12:43,319
Your payment
for all your hard work.
174
00:12:43,352 --> 00:12:45,388
Nedge Pepsi.
175
00:12:45,422 --> 00:12:47,691
Sean Shaughnessy.
176
00:12:47,724 --> 00:12:50,927
And... Mr. Dick Flynn.
177
00:13:00,470 --> 00:13:02,205
You know what, Seafield?
178
00:13:02,238 --> 00:13:04,374
I actually think
this is a really good plan.
179
00:13:04,407 --> 00:13:06,475
- Right?
- The monster will see me naked.
180
00:13:06,509 --> 00:13:08,478
- It'll wanna get on top of me!
- I think so, too.
181
00:13:08,510 --> 00:13:10,447
That's when I'll stab it
in its neck.
182
00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:11,981
That's the spirit, Dick!
183
00:13:12,014 --> 00:13:15,119
Now, everyone in position!
184
00:13:36,172 --> 00:13:38,108
Let's not shoot at me
this time.
185
00:13:38,140 --> 00:13:40,243
I take my orders
from the Captain.
186
00:13:43,212 --> 00:13:45,581
Now I know why
they call him Dick.
187
00:13:45,615 --> 00:13:47,317
Why?
188
00:13:47,350 --> 00:13:50,153
Because... he has a penis.
189
00:13:53,288 --> 00:13:54,991
Seven.
190
00:13:55,024 --> 00:13:56,326
Eight.
191
00:14:04,433 --> 00:14:07,403
Nine. Ten.
192
00:14:10,340 --> 00:14:12,609
- So brave.
- Mm-hmm...
193
00:14:19,581 --> 00:14:20,650
He's in.
194
00:14:27,724 --> 00:14:30,627
- Would you date him?
- Uh...
195
00:14:30,659 --> 00:14:33,462
I don't really date teammates.
196
00:14:33,495 --> 00:14:35,499
I don't date at all
because I'm a married man.
197
00:14:35,532 --> 00:14:37,234
It's one of those things
you can't be doing
198
00:14:37,267 --> 00:14:38,802
once you're married.
199
00:14:38,835 --> 00:14:40,704
Of course, I can still remember
me and Martha's first date...
200
00:14:40,736 --> 00:14:45,074
- Keep an eye on the sonar.
- Haunted beer garden.
201
00:14:57,352 --> 00:14:58,521
I got something!
202
00:14:58,554 --> 00:15:02,025
As do we, old chap!
Good job, Nedge!
203
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:12,369
Wow, this thing's actually
pretty big.
204
00:15:12,402 --> 00:15:14,237
Monster's aren't small, Nedge.
205
00:15:14,269 --> 00:15:15,538
Except for centipedes.
206
00:15:15,572 --> 00:15:17,807
Except for centipedes.
This is true.
207
00:15:17,841 --> 00:15:20,509
Although small, they are
quite monstrous, nevertheless.
208
00:15:20,543 --> 00:15:22,711
- All those legs.
- All those legs are right.
209
00:15:22,745 --> 00:15:25,048
It's encircling Dick!
210
00:15:27,182 --> 00:15:29,452
Sean Shaughnessy,
prepare to lock and load!
211
00:15:29,485 --> 00:15:30,553
Right!
212
00:15:32,355 --> 00:15:34,124
Alright, Sean Shaughnessy,
get in there and...
213
00:15:37,226 --> 00:15:39,262
Not seeing anything, Seafield.
214
00:15:54,510 --> 00:15:56,112
Dick!
215
00:15:58,914 --> 00:16:00,483
Dick!
216
00:16:20,503 --> 00:16:22,605
Alright, Sean Shaughnessy,
get in there!
217
00:16:22,639 --> 00:16:25,442
Kill the monster! Kill it!
218
00:16:25,475 --> 00:16:27,478
Damn it, Sean Shaughnessy!
219
00:16:28,443 --> 00:16:30,146
Alright, Nedge, you're up!
220
00:16:30,179 --> 00:16:32,448
I don't know, I'm really
more of a sonar individual.
221
00:16:46,962 --> 00:16:51,500
Dick! Dick! Thank Poseidon
you're alright. He lives!
222
00:16:51,533 --> 00:16:53,302
- Where are my clothes?
- Nedge?
223
00:16:53,336 --> 00:16:55,305
So, did you kill it?
224
00:16:55,337 --> 00:16:57,307
Did I kill it? No!
225
00:16:57,340 --> 00:16:58,875
Then how are you possibly
still alive?
226
00:16:58,908 --> 00:17:01,411
I dunno. One minute
he had me all wrapped up,
227
00:17:01,443 --> 00:17:03,312
then the next he was gone.
228
00:17:03,346 --> 00:17:04,681
Dear God!
229
00:17:04,713 --> 00:17:08,384
- Did you get a good look at it?
- No. Felt slimy.
230
00:17:08,417 --> 00:17:11,554
- You owe me a family heirloom.
- Yes, I do.
231
00:17:11,587 --> 00:17:13,423
I'll give you the money.
232
00:17:13,455 --> 00:17:15,358
Thank you, Seafield.
233
00:17:18,627 --> 00:17:20,462
Hey, guys, sorry!
234
00:17:20,496 --> 00:17:22,732
Sorry, my friend's terrible
at volleyball.
235
00:17:22,765 --> 00:17:25,402
Get out of here, Girlie!
236
00:17:32,375 --> 00:17:34,310
I didn't believe him.
237
00:17:34,344 --> 00:17:35,946
None of us did.
238
00:17:35,979 --> 00:17:39,548
Hmm...
A sea monster? Ridiculous.
239
00:17:39,582 --> 00:17:42,853
But he was right. That
eccentric bastard was right.
240
00:17:49,892 --> 00:17:53,663
- Wow.
- That big? Wow.
241
00:17:55,731 --> 00:17:59,469
So this huge monster
has you in its grasp
242
00:17:59,501 --> 00:18:00,803
and then it just lets you go.
243
00:18:00,836 --> 00:18:03,640
- Not a scratch.
- I wonder why.
244
00:18:03,673 --> 00:18:05,808
- Terrifying nevertheless.
- Ah...
245
00:18:08,411 --> 00:18:11,381
By the way, Seafield,
not a real sea captain.
246
00:18:11,413 --> 00:18:13,516
- Wait, seriously?
- No, I am not!
247
00:18:13,548 --> 00:18:15,618
There, happy, Nedge?
I'm docking your pay.
248
00:18:15,652 --> 00:18:17,653
- Where did you come from?
- Phoenix.
249
00:18:17,686 --> 00:18:19,521
Uh... no, just now.
250
00:18:19,555 --> 00:18:21,490
Trapdoor. It's my house, Nedge.
251
00:18:21,523 --> 00:18:23,359
This is some really
good bourbon.
252
00:18:23,393 --> 00:18:26,496
Isn't it? Ashcroft brought me
back a barrel from Glasgow.
253
00:18:26,528 --> 00:18:28,498
- Scotland?
- Kentucky.
254
00:18:28,530 --> 00:18:30,666
It's bourbon, after all.
255
00:18:30,700 --> 00:18:35,872
- Not... a moor.
- Who's Ashcroft?
256
00:18:35,904 --> 00:18:38,241
I be Ashcroft!
257
00:18:39,709 --> 00:18:42,379
I know. Tell them.
258
00:18:42,412 --> 00:18:44,980
I be Ashcroft!
259
00:18:45,013 --> 00:18:47,516
So, you're searching
for the old man, eh?
260
00:18:47,549 --> 00:18:50,452
That's right, and this is
my band of rowdy cutthroats,
261
00:18:50,486 --> 00:18:52,990
Dick, Nedge,
and Sean Shaughnessy.
262
00:18:57,727 --> 00:19:00,764
Well, I suppose
you could've done worse.
263
00:19:02,597 --> 00:19:04,500
You have a fine taste
in whiskey, sir!
264
00:19:04,534 --> 00:19:05,969
It's ruined me life!
265
00:19:06,001 --> 00:19:09,306
- What are we painting here?
- It's a freaking landscape.
266
00:19:11,441 --> 00:19:14,611
Oh, yeah. I can see it.
267
00:19:14,644 --> 00:19:17,846
So, how have you been
hunting this monster?
268
00:19:17,880 --> 00:19:19,616
Come aboard!
269
00:19:20,048 --> 00:19:21,651
Blades.
270
00:19:21,683 --> 00:19:22,885
Guns.
271
00:19:22,919 --> 00:19:24,854
- Sonar 2000.
- Sonar?
272
00:19:24,886 --> 00:19:26,855
Too good for the old ways, eh?
273
00:19:26,888 --> 00:19:29,391
Ashcroft, you know
I don't have intuition.
274
00:19:29,424 --> 00:19:30,559
He knows that.
275
00:19:30,593 --> 00:19:31,928
You don't use sonar
of any kind?
276
00:19:31,961 --> 00:19:34,698
Don't even know what it is,
to tell you the truth.
277
00:19:34,730 --> 00:19:38,301
Wait. You don't use...
How old are you?
278
00:19:43,472 --> 00:19:44,774
Thirty.
279
00:19:47,076 --> 00:19:52,615
After I graduated
high school in 2005,
280
00:19:52,647 --> 00:19:55,651
I went into the longshoreman
business to join my father.
281
00:19:55,684 --> 00:20:01,890
On my first day out, he said,
"Son! Sonar is for pussies!"
282
00:20:01,923 --> 00:20:04,394
- And that was the end of it.
- He never said that.
283
00:20:04,426 --> 00:20:07,396
- That was the end of it!
- He never said that.
284
00:20:07,430 --> 00:20:10,400
Okay, fine. He never said that.
285
00:20:10,432 --> 00:20:12,067
Anyways, the point is,
286
00:20:12,101 --> 00:20:13,870
if you're going to catch
that monster,
287
00:20:13,903 --> 00:20:15,404
you're going to have
to go at night.
288
00:20:15,438 --> 00:20:18,575
- Why at night?
- Monsters come out at night!
289
00:20:18,607 --> 00:20:21,778
- Ah, yes.
- And you'll need one of these!
290
00:20:21,810 --> 00:20:23,612
Hook your bait with this hook
291
00:20:23,645 --> 00:20:26,682
and your monster
is as good as hooked.
292
00:20:26,715 --> 00:20:28,150
I know I'm hooked.
293
00:20:28,183 --> 00:20:29,918
- Me, too.
- Me, three.
294
00:20:29,951 --> 00:20:31,654
Gimme that!
295
00:21:02,617 --> 00:21:08,758
♪ And that's when I said
goodbye... ♪
296
00:21:08,790 --> 00:21:11,126
- Yow!
- Oh, mercy!
297
00:21:11,160 --> 00:21:13,430
- Yow!
- Wonderful!
298
00:21:15,565 --> 00:21:17,167
- Whoo-hoo!
- Oh, wow.
299
00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:19,635
Absolutely terrific.
300
00:21:19,669 --> 00:21:23,773
- Dick, you're a real talent.
- Ah... I know.
301
00:21:23,806 --> 00:21:25,642
- Are you in a band?
- Use to be.
302
00:21:25,674 --> 00:21:27,609
Was the leader
of the Navy concert band.
303
00:21:27,643 --> 00:21:29,045
Like the director?
304
00:21:29,077 --> 00:21:32,080
The commanding officer.
So, yeah, the music director.
305
00:21:32,114 --> 00:21:34,550
Youngest in history, in fact.
306
00:21:34,584 --> 00:21:37,887
That's quite impressive, Dick.
I had no idea.
307
00:21:37,920 --> 00:21:41,557
It was a lot of fun. Traveling
the world, doing a lot of shows.
308
00:21:41,590 --> 00:21:44,193
Did some NFL games,
saw the Pyramids in Egypt.
309
00:21:44,227 --> 00:21:46,763
- That's awesome.
- Yeah.
310
00:21:46,796 --> 00:21:49,132
- What made you stop?
- Oh, I was discharged.
311
00:21:50,232 --> 00:21:51,967
Oh... okay.
312
00:21:53,736 --> 00:21:55,572
Yeah...
313
00:21:57,606 --> 00:21:59,675
Honorably, no doubt.
314
00:22:02,612 --> 00:22:03,846
Uh...
315
00:22:05,047 --> 00:22:07,683
No, not honorably.
316
00:22:07,717 --> 00:22:13,223
You see, I had lots of...
sexual misconduct
317
00:22:13,256 --> 00:22:17,660
with the woodwind
and percussion sections.
318
00:22:17,692 --> 00:22:19,261
I also shot the timpani player
319
00:22:19,295 --> 00:22:22,532
in a very strange
sequence of events.
320
00:22:29,305 --> 00:22:31,842
- So, dishonorable.
- Look, guy's a character.
321
00:22:54,063 --> 00:22:56,500
Battle stations!
322
00:23:00,269 --> 00:23:02,572
Wait for it...
323
00:23:04,205 --> 00:23:05,808
Now!
324
00:23:08,911 --> 00:23:11,080
- 1, 2, 3!
- Heave!
325
00:23:11,113 --> 00:23:13,950
- 1, 2, 3!
- Heave!
326
00:23:13,982 --> 00:23:16,318
- 1, 2, 3!
- Heave!
327
00:23:16,352 --> 00:23:18,086
Here it comes!
328
00:23:18,119 --> 00:23:20,923
Sean Shaughnessy!
329
00:23:20,957 --> 00:23:23,660
Sean Shaughnessy!
330
00:23:23,692 --> 00:23:26,195
Your time is up, monster!
331
00:23:36,204 --> 00:23:37,773
What...?
332
00:23:40,209 --> 00:23:41,778
Huh...
333
00:23:44,313 --> 00:23:45,882
Hmm...
334
00:23:47,782 --> 00:23:49,752
It's blank.
335
00:23:52,288 --> 00:23:54,924
Oh. Yes, of course.
336
00:24:02,365 --> 00:24:05,335
"Be seeing you...
337
00:24:08,971 --> 00:24:12,875
"...in your... dreams."
338
00:25:39,428 --> 00:25:41,264
Sean Shaughnessy!
339
00:25:47,368 --> 00:25:49,271
Does he not have
his eyebrow make-up on?
340
00:25:49,305 --> 00:25:51,207
Sean Shaughnessy!
341
00:25:55,144 --> 00:25:57,012
- I got it!
- Is that an egg?
342
00:25:57,046 --> 00:25:58,715
I got the egg!
343
00:26:02,183 --> 00:26:05,754
Sean Shaughnessy!
I got it! I got it!
344
00:26:05,788 --> 00:26:08,223
I got the egg! Hee-hee!
345
00:26:11,961 --> 00:26:14,997
Now! Shoot it, Sean Shaughnessy!
Shoot the egg!
346
00:26:15,029 --> 00:26:16,766
Is that the monster's egg?
347
00:26:16,798 --> 00:26:19,335
Yes. I saw some stuff
while I was sleeping.
348
00:26:19,367 --> 00:26:20,836
- Like a dream.
- That's the one.
349
00:26:20,869 --> 00:26:23,405
Where's your eyebrow make-up?
350
00:26:23,439 --> 00:26:25,374
I don't know
what you're talking about!
351
00:26:27,542 --> 00:26:29,244
Oh, no, you don't!
352
00:26:31,247 --> 00:26:33,182
Kill it! Kill it,
Sean Shaughnessy!
353
00:26:33,214 --> 00:26:36,118
Just like its mama
killed my daddy!
354
00:27:06,848 --> 00:27:08,283
Jesus!
355
00:27:17,026 --> 00:27:20,897
Chug, chug, chug, chug...
356
00:27:23,031 --> 00:27:24,533
Beer!
357
00:27:26,902 --> 00:27:28,538
Hurray!
358
00:27:28,570 --> 00:27:30,405
But did we have
to kill its baby?
359
00:27:30,439 --> 00:27:32,008
Blood for blood,
Nedge.
360
00:27:32,040 --> 00:27:33,809
It kills my father,
we shoot its egg.
361
00:27:33,843 --> 00:27:36,045
- Remind you of anything?
- Hmm... no.
362
00:27:36,077 --> 00:27:37,480
- Iwo Jima.
- How?
363
00:27:37,512 --> 00:27:39,247
Ooh, the candy shop!
364
00:27:39,280 --> 00:27:42,585
- So... Nedge.
- Yes?
365
00:27:42,617 --> 00:27:47,189
- What is your full name?
- Nedge Pepsi.
366
00:27:47,222 --> 00:27:51,493
No. No, I mean like
what is Nedge short for?
367
00:27:53,162 --> 00:27:55,064
Nedgecraft.
368
00:27:55,096 --> 00:27:57,465
"Nedgecraft"?
369
00:27:57,499 --> 00:27:59,935
- It's Polish.
- No, it's not.
370
00:27:59,969 --> 00:28:03,471
Your full name is
"Nedgecraft Pepsi"?
371
00:28:03,505 --> 00:28:05,241
Junior.
372
00:28:05,273 --> 00:28:08,176
Damn candy store is closed!
Bunch of pedophiles!
373
00:28:08,210 --> 00:28:10,846
Whoa! Hey, uh...
So what's our next plan, boss?
374
00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:13,082
Ah! The man knows a question
but not the answer.
375
00:28:13,115 --> 00:28:15,050
That's why I asked.
376
00:28:28,463 --> 00:28:31,333
Beach, water,
sonar station.
377
00:28:31,366 --> 00:28:33,101
Dick will carry
the egg carcass...
378
00:28:33,134 --> 00:28:34,336
Fully clothed.
379
00:28:34,369 --> 00:28:35,904
Fine.
But not your clothes.
380
00:28:35,938 --> 00:28:37,139
Everyone switch clothes.
381
00:28:37,172 --> 00:28:39,141
In order to draw
the sea hag out,
382
00:28:39,173 --> 00:28:41,911
Dick will toss the eggshells
one fathom into the sea.
383
00:28:41,943 --> 00:28:43,578
The scent will be intoxicating.
384
00:28:43,612 --> 00:28:46,182
The monster maiden
won't be able to resist.
385
00:28:46,214 --> 00:28:49,217
- She must be worried sick.
- Nedge let's hear it.
386
00:28:49,250 --> 00:28:50,485
Hear what?
387
00:28:50,519 --> 00:28:52,121
The name of the operation,
of course.
388
00:28:52,153 --> 00:28:54,289
Your last one was so clever.
389
00:28:54,323 --> 00:28:57,259
How about
Operation Eggsecution?
390
00:28:57,292 --> 00:28:58,660
Ah!
391
00:28:58,693 --> 00:29:00,528
No, no, wait, that's terrible.
But listen to this...
392
00:29:00,561 --> 00:29:03,899
Operation "Eggscuse me,
time to die!"
393
00:29:03,932 --> 00:29:06,603
And be sure to say that
when you shoot it in the brain.
394
00:30:13,102 --> 00:30:15,104
What is he doing?
395
00:30:16,238 --> 00:30:18,106
I don't know.
396
00:30:25,381 --> 00:30:28,351
Dick, I don't pay you
to flirt with inanimate objects!
397
00:30:28,384 --> 00:30:31,453
I got a guy for that.
Name's Howard.
398
00:30:45,099 --> 00:30:47,702
- Eagle's landed.
- Ah! Excellent!
399
00:30:47,736 --> 00:30:51,741
Now to play my favorite game
in the whole wide world.
400
00:30:51,773 --> 00:30:53,708
- Ah, the waiting game.
- Checkers!
401
00:30:53,741 --> 00:30:55,644
Is everything alright?
402
00:30:56,744 --> 00:30:58,146
Dick?
403
00:30:58,180 --> 00:30:59,481
So that's why you brought
that along.
404
00:30:59,515 --> 00:31:01,217
Yes.
405
00:31:01,250 --> 00:31:04,353
Why else would I bring checkers
along if not to play checkers?
406
00:31:04,385 --> 00:31:07,189
I think the eggshells
were just talking to me.
407
00:31:07,221 --> 00:31:09,224
They were talking to you?
408
00:31:10,192 --> 00:31:12,228
They were communicating.
409
00:31:12,260 --> 00:31:15,030
Like we had some sort
of strange connection.
410
00:31:17,432 --> 00:31:19,535
What possible reason
could there be
411
00:31:19,567 --> 00:31:22,504
for bringing a game
such as this to the beach
412
00:31:22,538 --> 00:31:25,474
without the intent to play it
amongst friends?
413
00:31:26,474 --> 00:31:28,243
I don't know.
414
00:31:30,778 --> 00:31:32,580
I'm docking your pay.
415
00:31:35,250 --> 00:31:36,752
Seafield, it's here.
416
00:31:41,722 --> 00:31:43,725
Where? Off the starboard?
417
00:31:43,759 --> 00:31:45,661
No, it's headed toward the egg!
418
00:31:45,693 --> 00:31:49,432
Ah! Alright, Sean Shaughnessy.
Time to make your country proud.
419
00:31:49,464 --> 00:31:52,268
It's closing in!
420
00:31:59,340 --> 00:32:01,342
Bingo!
421
00:32:01,375 --> 00:32:04,279
- This one's for you, daddy!
- Daddy?
422
00:32:21,696 --> 00:32:24,699
Aargh!
423
00:32:24,732 --> 00:32:25,701
Sean!
424
00:33:38,539 --> 00:33:43,444
Sean Shaughnessy was a better
man than most of our team.
425
00:33:43,478 --> 00:33:47,950
I'll never forget the day
I recruited him... Tuesday.
426
00:33:47,982 --> 00:33:49,751
He was bright-eyed
and bushy-tailed,
427
00:33:49,785 --> 00:33:51,387
and ready to get to work.
428
00:33:51,420 --> 00:33:55,758
He said, "Seafield, I am
your sword, I am your shield,
429
00:33:55,790 --> 00:33:58,493
"I am your weapons expert."
430
00:33:58,527 --> 00:34:01,230
Sean said that?
431
00:34:01,262 --> 00:34:02,731
He did.
432
00:34:05,534 --> 00:34:07,903
That was only the second time
anyone had ever said that to me.
433
00:34:07,935 --> 00:34:11,306
Well, I'll always remember
how brave he was.
434
00:34:11,340 --> 00:34:13,809
Whether charging into the lake
to fight the monster
435
00:34:13,842 --> 00:34:17,813
or discharging a firearm
on a public beach,
436
00:34:17,846 --> 00:34:19,981
Sean didn't care, he was brave.
437
00:34:20,014 --> 00:34:22,451
I don't have
any fond memories of Sean.
438
00:34:22,483 --> 00:34:23,885
Mostly because I'm pretty sure
439
00:34:23,918 --> 00:34:26,521
he shot and killed
my unborn child.
440
00:34:26,554 --> 00:34:28,389
You know, I had
a sneaking suspicion.
441
00:34:28,422 --> 00:34:29,791
Wait, what?
442
00:34:29,824 --> 00:34:33,528
- That egg was mine, wasn't it?
- Well... not yours.
443
00:34:33,561 --> 00:34:38,000
It's the monster's egg, Dick.
But yes! You made it happen.
444
00:34:38,032 --> 00:34:40,735
I had a dream regarding it.
445
00:34:40,768 --> 00:34:43,504
Oh, what? Are you upset?
446
00:34:43,538 --> 00:34:46,375
It was a monster baby!
447
00:34:46,407 --> 00:34:47,742
You should've at least told me
448
00:34:47,775 --> 00:34:49,877
before you let Sean shoot
the shit out of it!
449
00:34:49,911 --> 00:34:51,679
What does it even matter?
450
00:34:51,713 --> 00:34:54,617
Were you really going to raise
a grotesque hell spawn?
451
00:34:56,318 --> 00:34:58,653
- In this economy?
- I'm confused.
452
00:34:58,686 --> 00:35:00,521
It wasn't your call to make,
Seafield!
453
00:35:00,554 --> 00:35:04,826
Oh, I'm sorry!
Please forgive me!
454
00:35:04,860 --> 00:35:06,862
You're right!
455
00:35:06,894 --> 00:35:11,300
Ooh! We should've constructed
a large nest for it.
456
00:35:11,333 --> 00:35:14,802
Have Papa Dick nurture
the egg day and night
457
00:35:14,835 --> 00:35:17,472
for several weeks
under his loins,
458
00:35:17,505 --> 00:35:20,975
until one day the egg
decides to hatch
459
00:35:21,009 --> 00:35:23,478
and bite our fucking heads off!
460
00:35:23,512 --> 00:35:26,414
- I would make a great dad!
- Wait, that's it...
461
00:35:26,447 --> 00:35:28,384
It must've happened during
Operation Nauty Lady
462
00:35:28,416 --> 00:35:29,652
when Dick was naked.
463
00:35:29,684 --> 00:35:32,020
The monster seized him,
pulled him underwater,
464
00:35:32,054 --> 00:35:33,822
and somehow extracted his...
465
00:35:33,855 --> 00:35:36,525
Yes, very good, Nedge. We don't
have to go into graphic detail,
466
00:35:36,557 --> 00:35:37,693
you sick weirdo.
467
00:35:37,726 --> 00:35:39,628
I'm done with you,
Seafield.
468
00:35:39,661 --> 00:35:42,664
Your father,
he can burn in hell!
469
00:35:42,697 --> 00:35:44,632
Oh, why don't you go shoot
a timpani player,
470
00:35:44,666 --> 00:35:46,735
you big treasonous seaman?
471
00:35:46,768 --> 00:35:48,536
Hey! What are you doing here?
472
00:35:48,570 --> 00:35:50,506
You can't be digging
in a cemetery!
473
00:35:50,539 --> 00:35:52,041
That's vandalism!
474
00:35:52,074 --> 00:35:55,411
Seafield, you're vandals and
felons! I'm calling the cops!
475
00:35:55,443 --> 00:35:57,679
- Let's go, outta here.
- Get back here!
476
00:35:57,713 --> 00:36:00,481
'Uh, mission failed.
477
00:36:00,514 --> 00:36:03,851
'Failed. Failed. Failed!'
478
00:36:03,885 --> 00:36:06,522
Oh, God! Why is this so hard?
479
00:36:11,693 --> 00:36:15,731
What really happened that day,
Seafield?
480
00:36:15,764 --> 00:36:18,599
What day? There are many days.
481
00:36:18,632 --> 00:36:19,934
The day your father disappeared.
482
00:36:19,967 --> 00:36:21,903
I already told you
what happened.
483
00:36:21,936 --> 00:36:24,105
Look, I know you pay us a lot,
484
00:36:24,139 --> 00:36:27,776
and it's not really
my place to ask,
485
00:36:27,809 --> 00:36:29,612
but... come on.
486
00:36:31,612 --> 00:36:33,081
What?
487
00:36:33,114 --> 00:36:35,750
You took your boat from the
dock, immediately ran aground,
488
00:36:35,784 --> 00:36:37,653
decided to start fishing,
489
00:36:37,686 --> 00:36:40,923
and then the monster attacked
your father and took him away.
490
00:36:40,956 --> 00:36:42,524
Took him away and killed him!
491
00:36:42,556 --> 00:36:44,926
You told us your father
was a seasoned ship captain.
492
00:36:44,960 --> 00:36:47,128
This sounds like the work
of a small child
493
00:36:47,161 --> 00:36:49,564
or someone who's a drunk.
494
00:36:49,597 --> 00:36:52,433
Well, he was, Nedge! And he'd
been drinking all morning.
495
00:36:52,467 --> 00:36:53,936
I wasn't much more
fair for ware
496
00:36:53,969 --> 00:36:57,505
because you see I, too, am
a drunk. As is Ashcroft.
497
00:36:57,539 --> 00:37:00,743
And no, my father was not
a seasoned ship captain.
498
00:37:00,775 --> 00:37:02,744
I never said this,
you assumed this.
499
00:37:02,777 --> 00:37:05,446
Just as you assumed
I was a ship captain.
500
00:37:05,480 --> 00:37:07,949
As you probably assumed
Ashcroft is, too.
501
00:37:07,983 --> 00:37:10,419
It's hard not to assume
your father was a ship captain
502
00:37:10,452 --> 00:37:12,955
when you told us
your father was a ship captain.
503
00:37:12,987 --> 00:37:15,456
- Oh, I never said such a thing!
- Yes, you did!
504
00:37:15,489 --> 00:37:17,058
At the beginning
of all of this.
505
00:37:17,092 --> 00:37:19,728
A-ha... A-ha!
506
00:37:19,760 --> 00:37:22,898
Well, that must've just been
one of my little lying fits.
507
00:37:22,931 --> 00:37:25,800
I do that an awful lot
to make up for the fact
508
00:37:25,833 --> 00:37:27,902
that I don't actually have
a lot going for me.
509
00:37:27,936 --> 00:37:31,539
No, what about your house here?
You have a beautiful house.
510
00:37:31,572 --> 00:37:33,107
It's all illusion, Nedge!
511
00:37:33,141 --> 00:37:36,445
A simple parlor trick in which
a man moves into a lighthouse
512
00:37:36,478 --> 00:37:39,581
and pretends to be someone other
than the museum's docent.
513
00:37:39,614 --> 00:37:41,849
- So this is a museum?
- Yes!
514
00:37:41,882 --> 00:37:45,453
- Not your house.
- No.
515
00:37:45,487 --> 00:37:47,523
- And you're a docent here?
- And a fraud!
516
00:37:47,556 --> 00:37:49,590
We're all just a bunch
of frauds, Nedge.
517
00:37:49,623 --> 00:37:51,426
I'm the biggest charlatan
of them all.
518
00:37:51,460 --> 00:37:54,496
At least my father
and Ashcroft were sailors.
519
00:37:54,528 --> 00:37:56,632
I just stay cooped up
in my lighthouse villa
520
00:37:56,664 --> 00:37:59,101
playing make-believe
with my old-ass wife.
521
00:37:59,134 --> 00:38:01,135
You mean the state's lighthouse.
522
00:38:01,168 --> 00:38:04,839
There I go again, pretending!
This hat? A costume prop!
523
00:38:04,873 --> 00:38:08,844
This ivory? Real ivory!
Not mine! The museum's!
524
00:38:08,876 --> 00:38:10,978
In fact, I'm actually pretty
surprised none of you picked up
525
00:38:11,012 --> 00:38:13,916
on the sheer blatantness
that this is clearly a museum.
526
00:38:15,250 --> 00:38:16,652
Hmm!
527
00:38:17,686 --> 00:38:18,921
Dude, sick.
528
00:38:18,954 --> 00:38:20,722
- Yeah, sick.
- Sick.
529
00:38:20,755 --> 00:38:24,492
Okay, but why are you being
this con man?
530
00:38:24,525 --> 00:38:28,730
Because...
if I hadn't pretended
531
00:38:28,762 --> 00:38:31,733
to be this wealthy mariner...
532
00:38:33,268 --> 00:38:36,070
...none of you would've
helped me to my cause.
533
00:38:36,103 --> 00:38:40,074
I never had a mother and
I just want to find my father.
534
00:38:40,108 --> 00:38:42,744
These checks aren't good,
are they?
535
00:38:45,280 --> 00:38:47,716
Nedge! Don't go!
536
00:38:47,748 --> 00:38:50,017
Reconsider! Please!
537
00:38:50,050 --> 00:38:52,520
Those checks,
they might not be good,
538
00:38:52,554 --> 00:38:56,892
but I'm still a pretty fun guy
to hang out with!
539
00:38:56,925 --> 00:38:59,862
Come on!
Captain Cool over here!
540
00:38:59,894 --> 00:39:04,599
You know... Look, please, I'll
do anything. I'll rob a bank!
541
00:39:21,282 --> 00:39:28,623
♪ I can see the waters
in the morning
542
00:39:28,657 --> 00:39:34,863
♪ I can see the ships
sail into bay
543
00:39:34,896 --> 00:39:41,068
♪ There must be some team
who'll do my bidding
544
00:39:41,101 --> 00:39:47,108
♪ Without questioning,
drinking, dying or pay!
545
00:39:47,141 --> 00:39:52,547
♪ I know my life is
still worth living
546
00:39:52,581 --> 00:39:59,086
♪ I will conquer
foe and friend alike... ♪
547
00:39:59,119 --> 00:40:03,192
Seafield! Knock it off!
You're a terrible singer.
548
00:40:07,596 --> 00:40:08,963
Sorry.
549
00:40:09,864 --> 00:40:12,067
Did you buy a house?
550
00:40:16,271 --> 00:40:18,673
- 'Tis a sublease.
- Oh.
551
00:40:21,976 --> 00:40:25,179
Remember the first time
dad took us out on the boat?
552
00:40:25,213 --> 00:40:27,716
How could I forget?
553
00:40:27,748 --> 00:40:30,217
I was five years old.
554
00:40:30,251 --> 00:40:33,822
You couldn't have been more
than eight or nine at the time.
555
00:40:33,855 --> 00:40:35,690
We were so scared that day,
556
00:40:35,724 --> 00:40:39,027
dad taking us out on the sea
for the first time.
557
00:40:39,059 --> 00:40:42,730
Couple of landlubbers like us,
huh? Times have changed.
558
00:40:42,764 --> 00:40:46,268
But he said, "Don't be scared.
Everything will be alright.
559
00:40:46,300 --> 00:40:49,337
"This'll be a fun time.
I'll keep you safe."
560
00:40:49,371 --> 00:40:52,874
He also said, "If either one
of you should get seasick
561
00:40:52,907 --> 00:40:55,611
"and throw up all over the deck,
562
00:40:55,643 --> 00:40:59,981
I will take my harpoon gun and
I will shoot you in the face."
563
00:41:00,014 --> 00:41:01,817
Then, of course,
you did get sick
564
00:41:01,849 --> 00:41:04,118
and the rest is history,
as we may say.
565
00:41:04,152 --> 00:41:05,753
Funny guy, dad.
566
00:41:05,786 --> 00:41:07,388
Well, he did
the best he could
567
00:41:07,422 --> 00:41:10,159
as a single teenage father.
568
00:41:16,864 --> 00:41:19,634
Go to the catacombs.
569
00:41:22,336 --> 00:41:24,338
The catacombs?
Are you mad? No!
570
00:41:24,371 --> 00:41:26,007
- You must!
- I mustn't.
571
00:41:26,041 --> 00:41:27,909
- I think you should.
- Why should I?
572
00:41:27,942 --> 00:41:31,246
You killed the monster's child.
Now you're cursed.
573
00:41:31,278 --> 00:41:33,815
Well, actually the dead guy,
Sean Shaughnessy,
574
00:41:33,847 --> 00:41:35,916
he's the one who killed
the monster's child.
575
00:41:35,949 --> 00:41:38,319
I just told him to.
Ipso facto...
576
00:41:38,353 --> 00:41:40,021
Even worse!
577
00:41:40,054 --> 00:41:44,158
A man whom you have cursed
and later led to the slaughter.
578
00:41:44,192 --> 00:41:46,695
Yep, here it is.
579
00:41:46,728 --> 00:41:50,766
The wandering cursed spirit
will not rest
580
00:41:50,798 --> 00:41:57,905
until it brings the cursee's
life to a resounding end.
581
00:41:59,873 --> 00:42:01,742
What can I do, Ashcroft?
582
00:42:01,775 --> 00:42:04,745
You're a dead man walking,
Seafield.
583
00:42:04,778 --> 00:42:07,014
Might as well avenge
the old man's death
584
00:42:07,047 --> 00:42:10,751
and your friend's death
while you still can.
585
00:42:10,784 --> 00:42:13,321
Go to the catacombs.
586
00:43:09,978 --> 00:43:11,880
Fore!
587
00:43:13,213 --> 00:43:16,784
Hey, sorry about that, fellas...
Whoa, Dick! Nedge!
588
00:43:16,818 --> 00:43:20,355
What are you guys doing here?
Ice cream sandwiches?
589
00:43:20,387 --> 00:43:22,090
What do you want, Seafield?
590
00:43:22,123 --> 00:43:24,291
Alright, you've seen through my
ruse. I wasn't actually golfing.
591
00:43:24,324 --> 00:43:26,527
- Yeah, no shit.
- Get out of here, Seafield.
592
00:43:26,561 --> 00:43:28,296
Look, I'm sorry about before.
593
00:43:28,329 --> 00:43:30,031
But now I've come
to right the wrong
594
00:43:30,063 --> 00:43:31,832
of not paying you
for your services
595
00:43:31,865 --> 00:43:34,235
by paying you for your services!
596
00:43:34,268 --> 00:43:36,971
- You don't have the money.
- I'll sell my pontoon!
597
00:43:37,005 --> 00:43:39,041
You killed my unborn child.
598
00:43:40,440 --> 00:43:43,878
- I'll sell my pontoon.
- You mean the museum's pontoon.
599
00:43:43,911 --> 00:43:47,782
Ha-ha! Very funny,
Nedge the hedge. Right?
600
00:43:47,815 --> 00:43:49,850
What kind of services
are you even talking about?
601
00:43:49,884 --> 00:43:51,552
Security of my life.
602
00:43:51,585 --> 00:43:52,953
The weapon's bag
is in the graveyard.
603
00:43:52,987 --> 00:43:54,155
And we're not weapons experts.
604
00:43:54,188 --> 00:43:55,923
I don't care about any of that!
605
00:43:55,956 --> 00:43:58,292
Look, I'm going to be going up
against a lot of moving parts
606
00:43:58,326 --> 00:44:00,028
in the near future.
607
00:44:00,061 --> 00:44:02,998
I need trustworthy, reliable,
dependable people by my side.
608
00:44:03,030 --> 00:44:04,431
Besides, you know the old adage:
609
00:44:04,465 --> 00:44:06,201
"Six pairs of eyes
are better than two."
610
00:44:06,233 --> 00:44:07,869
Not an old adage.
611
00:44:07,902 --> 00:44:10,838
You mean: "Three pairs of eyes
are better than one."
612
00:44:10,871 --> 00:44:13,875
Yes, if I were Ashcroft
and only had one pair of eyes,
613
00:44:13,907 --> 00:44:15,277
that would be correct.
614
00:44:15,309 --> 00:44:17,311
But I have two pairs of eyes
and there are two of you,
615
00:44:17,344 --> 00:44:19,980
so that makes it
six pairs of eyes.
616
00:44:20,014 --> 00:44:23,218
You know one pair of eyes
makes two eyeballs?
617
00:44:23,251 --> 00:44:25,519
A pear is also a fruit, Nedge.
618
00:44:25,552 --> 00:44:29,857
In that case, yes, a pair
of pears would be two pear.
619
00:44:29,891 --> 00:44:33,461
Two pairs of two pears
would be four pears.
620
00:44:33,494 --> 00:44:36,264
No! There would be two pear.
621
00:44:36,297 --> 00:44:39,501
- Two pairs of pears?
- No!
622
00:44:39,534 --> 00:44:42,971
- Or two pear.
- Yes, that's right.
623
00:44:43,003 --> 00:44:48,309
As if you're describing
the plural form of "pear"...
624
00:44:48,342 --> 00:44:50,911
In its singular form!
625
00:44:50,945 --> 00:44:53,615
Oh! So you think "pear"
is like "deer"?
626
00:44:53,648 --> 00:44:55,383
Or "lamb".
627
00:44:55,416 --> 00:44:59,187
No! A pear is a fruit!
628
00:44:59,219 --> 00:45:00,955
Bye, Seafield.
629
00:45:35,456 --> 00:45:37,593
Aargh... Aargh!
630
00:45:41,396 --> 00:45:43,398
You killed me.
631
00:45:43,431 --> 00:45:47,168
'The wandering cursed spirit
will not rest
632
00:45:47,201 --> 00:45:53,574
'until it brings the cursee's
life to a resounding end.'
633
00:46:12,427 --> 00:46:14,930
Oh, my God, what's that?
634
00:46:16,331 --> 00:46:18,166
What...?
635
00:46:44,726 --> 00:46:47,028
'Next stop: Lighthouse Island.'
636
00:47:24,097 --> 00:47:27,201
'Prepare for arrival
at Lighthouse Island.'
637
00:48:16,083 --> 00:48:17,451
Captain?
638
00:48:22,456 --> 00:48:24,324
Captain?
639
00:48:26,193 --> 00:48:28,063
Captain?
640
00:48:29,362 --> 00:48:31,500
Uh... Captain?
641
00:48:35,702 --> 00:48:37,304
Captain?
642
00:48:38,806 --> 00:48:40,708
Yep, this is a phantom ship.
643
00:48:54,155 --> 00:48:57,259
Milwaukee?
We're going backwards.
644
00:49:00,128 --> 00:49:03,097
Gotta turn this bird around.
645
00:49:08,802 --> 00:49:12,639
♪ Dear Old Captain Seafield,
you're a stinker, it's true
646
00:49:12,672 --> 00:49:16,543
♪ You put forty odd bullets
through your favorite nephew
647
00:49:16,577 --> 00:49:20,582
♪ You ran from the battle,
your men never get paid
648
00:49:20,614 --> 00:49:23,250
♪ And down in the black
of your past
649
00:49:23,284 --> 00:49:26,788
♪ Lurks a mean old sea hag
650
00:49:31,925 --> 00:49:36,297
♪ Dear Old Captain Seafield,
you're a thief and a cheat
651
00:49:36,329 --> 00:49:40,335
♪ You broke into my lodging
and stole my good meat
652
00:49:40,367 --> 00:49:44,304
♪ You made eyes at me daughter,
you sullied my wife
653
00:49:44,338 --> 00:49:48,643
♪ You're a damn drunken devil
and the best friend... ♪
654
00:49:58,318 --> 00:50:01,456
Pure intuition! Ha-ha-ha!
655
00:50:23,577 --> 00:50:25,413
Aargh!
656
00:50:42,230 --> 00:50:43,597
Alright.
657
00:50:44,331 --> 00:50:45,833
Hmm... Ah...
658
00:50:51,938 --> 00:50:53,807
Alright...
659
00:51:02,949 --> 00:51:04,851
Urgh...
660
00:51:04,885 --> 00:51:06,854
Uh...?
661
00:51:06,887 --> 00:51:08,456
No.
662
00:51:09,023 --> 00:51:11,358
Uh... ah...
663
00:51:12,460 --> 00:51:16,431
Ah... hmm...
664
00:51:16,463 --> 00:51:18,967
Ah, God, I wish I was
a sea captain.
665
00:51:21,768 --> 00:51:23,237
Ah...
666
00:51:26,440 --> 00:51:29,476
Shit! Oh!
667
00:51:36,717 --> 00:51:37,818
Shit.
668
00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:56,270
Perhaps this will do...
669
00:51:59,039 --> 00:52:01,775
Oh! Success!
670
00:52:10,818 --> 00:52:12,787
Ah, here we are.
671
00:52:16,791 --> 00:52:18,260
Yes!
672
00:52:40,614 --> 00:52:42,550
Hello, Ashcroft! Wh...?
673
00:52:53,059 --> 00:52:54,929
Seafield...
674
00:52:56,097 --> 00:52:58,900
There's something
I have to tell you.
675
00:53:00,000 --> 00:53:03,371
The reason we don't have
a mother
676
00:53:03,403 --> 00:53:08,543
is because she was harpooned
to death by our father.
677
00:53:24,692 --> 00:53:26,427
Who wants fish sticks?
678
00:53:26,460 --> 00:53:28,530
Not now, Martha!
679
00:53:46,746 --> 00:53:49,817
'Go to the catacombs.'
680
00:55:09,996 --> 00:55:11,899
Ghost Army!
681
00:55:27,715 --> 00:55:30,885
Father... is dead.
682
00:55:32,286 --> 00:55:35,722
Ashcroft is also dead.
683
00:55:35,755 --> 00:55:37,157
Monster cut his head off.
684
00:55:37,190 --> 00:55:39,593
I did not want to ask
for your help,
685
00:55:39,626 --> 00:55:41,962
but now I'm running short
on time.
686
00:55:43,630 --> 00:55:46,967
Anyways... uh...
687
00:55:49,269 --> 00:55:51,239
What I got here?
688
00:55:55,809 --> 00:55:58,813
My life I vow...
689
00:55:59,847 --> 00:56:01,182
...if you help me now.
690
00:56:07,820 --> 00:56:09,023
Anyone?
691
00:56:10,757 --> 00:56:14,495
My life I vow...
if you help me now.
692
00:56:17,998 --> 00:56:21,202
There's one. Yes, yes.
Alright.
693
00:56:21,235 --> 00:56:26,274
Oh, we have two! Who's next?
Right here. Alright.
694
00:56:26,306 --> 00:56:29,276
Yes, yes, yes!
695
00:56:29,309 --> 00:56:33,648
Yes. Come!
Follow me, Ghost Army!
696
00:57:30,637 --> 00:57:32,672
Go get 'em, boys!
697
00:58:03,237 --> 00:58:04,639
Well?
698
00:58:42,242 --> 00:58:44,746
You're not good at this game,
Mr. Ghost.
699
00:58:46,947 --> 00:58:49,849
'This is Ghost 4
coming in on can 2.
700
00:58:49,882 --> 00:58:52,185
'Like I said, this is
Ghost 4 coming in on can 2.'
701
00:58:52,219 --> 00:58:55,121
Can you read me? Seafield,
we are having trouble down here.
702
00:58:55,155 --> 00:58:57,191
Troop leaders getting
demolished by this thing.
703
00:58:57,224 --> 00:58:59,994
We were not prepared for the
magnitude of this hellish beast.
704
00:59:00,027 --> 00:59:02,396
Oh! Oh, good God!
705
00:59:02,429 --> 00:59:06,099
Oh! Oh, Seafield,
we need to reassess our plan.
706
00:59:06,132 --> 00:59:09,069
We're losing a lot of good
ghosts. And we need a moment...
707
00:59:14,942 --> 00:59:17,744
The battle wages on.
Your move.
708
00:59:27,521 --> 00:59:32,159
You're worse
than Martha. And she's senile.
709
00:59:32,192 --> 00:59:34,027
Uh?
710
00:59:46,472 --> 00:59:48,809
It was a massacre.
711
01:00:03,891 --> 01:00:07,094
'Stop sending
daddy's Ghost Army.
712
01:00:07,126 --> 01:00:09,463
Come fight me yourself!'
713
01:01:13,360 --> 01:01:15,463
What...?
714
01:01:17,097 --> 01:01:19,500
- Oh!
- Die!
715
01:01:51,565 --> 01:01:53,400
A-ha-ha!
716
01:03:11,744 --> 01:03:15,148
Uh?
717
01:03:57,690 --> 01:03:59,759
Oh...
718
01:04:59,686 --> 01:05:02,088
Must be imagining things.
719
01:05:09,728 --> 01:05:11,131
What are you doing?
720
01:05:12,599 --> 01:05:14,035
What?
721
01:05:16,103 --> 01:05:17,371
What?
722
01:05:18,871 --> 01:05:20,840
Monster?
723
01:05:20,873 --> 01:05:23,076
In there?
724
01:05:27,313 --> 01:05:29,148
No! No, no, no, no.
725
01:05:29,181 --> 01:05:31,150
Wait, wait, wait. Hold on
one second. Wait, wait, wait.
726
01:05:31,184 --> 01:05:33,253
No, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
727
01:05:33,286 --> 01:05:35,489
No, no, no, Mr. Ghost,
you go in there first.
728
01:05:35,521 --> 01:05:37,623
I vowed my life to you people.
729
01:05:37,657 --> 01:05:40,760
Now, get in there
and make something happen.
730
01:05:40,793 --> 01:05:42,496
I believe in you.
731
01:06:02,882 --> 01:06:04,451
Shh!
732
01:06:15,394 --> 01:06:17,364
Ooh!
733
01:06:17,396 --> 01:06:19,565
Shh! Shh!
734
01:06:19,599 --> 01:06:21,702
Jesus! Goddamnit!
735
01:07:25,498 --> 01:07:26,867
Father.
736
01:07:58,530 --> 01:08:01,634
All out of patsies are we,
darling?
737
01:08:04,704 --> 01:08:06,539
Sea hag!
738
01:08:07,440 --> 01:08:09,775
I shall have my revenge!
739
01:08:09,809 --> 01:08:12,746
For my brother!
740
01:08:14,748 --> 01:08:19,386
Well, that was my revenge
for my unborn child!
741
01:08:19,418 --> 01:08:22,855
Well, that was my revenge
for my father!
742
01:08:28,295 --> 01:08:31,364
Well, that was my revenge...
743
01:08:31,398 --> 01:08:33,567
for your father...
744
01:08:33,600 --> 01:08:36,737
harpooning my mother to death!
745
01:08:39,572 --> 01:08:42,542
Oh, boo-hoo,
he harpooned my mother, too.
746
01:08:44,978 --> 01:08:46,680
Come here, baby...
747
01:08:56,055 --> 01:09:00,560
Seafield, he harpooned
my mother and your mother.
748
01:09:02,028 --> 01:09:04,431
Seafield...
749
01:09:04,463 --> 01:09:06,899
we have the same parents.
750
01:09:13,472 --> 01:09:15,376
Try to remember.
751
01:09:26,353 --> 01:09:28,555
Blasphemy!
752
01:09:28,587 --> 01:09:31,024
- What...?
- Liar!
753
01:09:40,466 --> 01:09:42,036
Damn!
754
01:10:05,492 --> 01:10:08,962
Uh... you must be
a visual learner.
755
01:10:16,970 --> 01:10:21,408
'Yes, we are kin,
Seafield.
756
01:10:21,440 --> 01:10:23,577
'When the three of us
were little,
757
01:10:23,609 --> 01:10:26,145
'our father was a drunkard.
758
01:10:26,179 --> 01:10:28,849
'Every night after work,
he would get hammered
759
01:10:28,881 --> 01:10:32,152
'and head to the lake to see
our hideous sea monster mother,
760
01:10:32,185 --> 01:10:35,822
'and love her for who she was.
761
01:10:35,854 --> 01:10:41,427
'But one day, he went
to the liquor store at 12:05,
762
01:10:41,461 --> 01:10:43,963
'five minutes after closing,
763
01:10:43,997 --> 01:10:49,101
'and could not purchase
any ice-cold Milwaukee brews.
764
01:10:49,135 --> 01:10:53,105
'He went home sober.
765
01:10:53,139 --> 01:10:55,876
'Upon seeing his wife through
sober eyes for the first time,
766
01:10:55,908 --> 01:10:57,911
'he was shocked
at her disgusting face
767
01:10:57,944 --> 01:11:00,046
'and immediately harpooned her,
768
01:11:00,078 --> 01:11:04,583
'leaving the three of us
without a mother.
769
01:11:04,617 --> 01:11:06,485
'I have no patience for men
770
01:11:06,519 --> 01:11:09,756
'who come home sober
and beat their wives.
771
01:11:09,788 --> 01:11:11,724
'So when I came of killing age,
772
01:11:11,757 --> 01:11:14,027
'I took vengeance
upon the old man.
773
01:11:14,060 --> 01:11:17,664
'This gave me peace.
774
01:11:17,697 --> 01:11:21,734
'Now, I want to put
our violent past behind us.
775
01:11:21,768 --> 01:11:25,639
'So I birthed a child
by the naked swimming man.
776
01:11:25,671 --> 01:11:27,506
'But you rejected
this peace offering
777
01:11:27,539 --> 01:11:29,576
'and killed your own nephew,
778
01:11:29,609 --> 01:11:33,680
'so I settled the score
with Ashcroft.
779
01:11:33,712 --> 01:11:37,183
'Now that we are even
once more, I ask you...'
780
01:11:42,255 --> 01:11:48,127
Brother, let us make peace
and end this cycle of vengeance.
781
01:12:01,707 --> 01:12:03,777
Come here, big sis!
782
01:12:03,810 --> 01:12:06,546
Oh! Come here, little bro!
783
01:12:06,578 --> 01:12:10,483
- I'm sorry!
- I'm sorry, too!
784
01:12:10,516 --> 01:12:13,220
- Bring it in!
- Bring it in.
785
01:12:33,139 --> 01:12:35,509
I didn't believe your story
for a second!
786
01:12:35,542 --> 01:12:38,545
It's true! I'm not lying!
787
01:12:38,578 --> 01:12:40,146
It's all lies!
788
01:12:40,179 --> 01:12:45,118
Everyone knows Milwaukee liquor
stores close at 9:00 not 12:00!
789
01:12:45,150 --> 01:12:49,188
Seafield, I'm your sister.
How could you kill your own...?
790
01:12:49,221 --> 01:12:52,192
Wait... 9:00?
791
01:12:52,225 --> 01:12:56,029
- 9:00pm?
- Yeah, I know.
792
01:12:57,697 --> 01:13:00,300
That's just so early.
793
01:13:00,332 --> 01:13:02,301
I know, I know.
It's actually ridiculous.
794
01:13:02,335 --> 01:13:04,671
I want to hear their reasoning
on that, you know.
795
01:13:04,703 --> 01:13:07,072
Granted. I think we would
all appreciate that.
796
01:13:07,105 --> 01:13:09,576
I mean, I don't have
the numbers in front of me...
797
01:13:09,609 --> 01:13:11,578
- Well...
- How is that... I mean...
798
01:13:11,610 --> 01:13:12,778
Who's that helping?
799
01:13:12,811 --> 01:13:15,215
I honestly think
the idea is that, uh...
800
01:13:15,247 --> 01:13:18,918
people will go out to bars
and restaurants, spend money.
801
01:13:18,952 --> 01:13:20,820
Help support the local economy,
802
01:13:20,853 --> 01:13:22,855
I think that's where
their heads are at, anyways.
803
01:13:25,257 --> 01:13:27,560
Maybe.
804
01:13:27,594 --> 01:13:30,630
Maybe, huh... Some of these
ordinances, I tell you.
805
01:13:30,662 --> 01:13:32,298
Some of these ordinances,
indeed.
806
01:13:32,332 --> 01:13:34,935
- Huh!
- Hmm...
807
01:13:38,871 --> 01:13:41,307
And now to get my revenge!
808
01:13:43,676 --> 01:13:45,745
I've avenged you, father!
809
01:13:45,778 --> 01:13:48,148
I am a hero!
810
01:13:48,180 --> 01:13:50,550
Everyone, take heed!
811
01:13:55,822 --> 01:13:58,225
Ah... Oh...
812
01:14:08,234 --> 01:14:10,037
Thank you.
813
01:14:11,738 --> 01:14:13,606
Aargh! Ow!
814
01:14:13,640 --> 01:14:16,209
Thank you for avenging me.
815
01:14:20,012 --> 01:14:22,649
Oh... ha-ha-ha!
816
01:14:22,681 --> 01:14:26,319
Rest in peace, Sean Shaughnessy.
817
01:15:24,077 --> 01:15:28,681
♪ Dear Old Captain Seafield,
the monster, you say
818
01:15:28,715 --> 01:15:32,786
♪ Rose up from the depths,
and men started to pray
819
01:15:32,819 --> 01:15:37,123
♪ Your father stood bravely
with harpoon in hand
820
01:15:37,155 --> 01:15:44,030
♪ And that was the last
that anyone's seen of the man
821
01:15:48,935 --> 01:15:53,740
♪ Dear Old Captain Seafield,
with your old man long gone
822
01:15:53,773 --> 01:15:57,743
♪ You sure found some trouble
and it didn't take long
823
01:15:57,777 --> 01:16:01,980
♪ You assembled a fine crew
of misfits and scum
824
01:16:02,014 --> 01:16:04,884
♪ So roll up your sleeves,
you skullduggers
825
01:16:04,917 --> 01:16:08,689
♪ And mind you the rum
826
01:16:13,391 --> 01:16:18,497
♪ Dear Old Captain Seafield,
he went off to sea
827
01:16:18,530 --> 01:16:22,868
♪ He came back no captain,
though pretended to be
828
01:16:22,902 --> 01:16:26,872
♪ He said he'd found treasure
on far distant shore
829
01:16:26,905 --> 01:16:29,876
♪ But all he could show
was some crabs
830
01:16:29,908 --> 01:16:33,412
♪ He caught from a whore
831
01:16:44,390 --> 01:16:49,195
♪ Dear Old Captain Seafield,
he stumbled the world
832
01:16:49,228 --> 01:16:53,298
♪ And told his lying brags
down to every sweet girl
833
01:16:53,332 --> 01:16:57,837
♪ He'll try to impress you
with maps and with charts
834
01:16:57,869 --> 01:17:01,140
♪ But truly his gift is
to clear out the bar
835
01:17:01,173 --> 01:17:04,010
♪ With his farts
836
01:17:09,948 --> 01:17:14,253
♪ Dear Old Captain Seafield,
you're a wild game of chance
837
01:17:14,287 --> 01:17:18,324
♪ His luck comes and goes
like the moon and his pants
838
01:17:18,356 --> 01:17:22,561
♪ You live by a code
these damn pirates still swear
839
01:17:22,595 --> 01:17:25,498
♪ The stray dogs,
they love him for sure
840
01:17:25,530 --> 01:17:29,502
♪ The cats, they beware
841
01:17:36,108 --> 01:17:40,113
♪ Dear Old Captain Seafield! ♪
57680
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
