All language subtitles for Tijuana.Jackson.Purpose.Over.Prison.2020.1080p.WEBRip.x264-RARBG

Middle finger to the judges
because I ain't on trial.

Props Caitlyn Jenner
because there's a lot

of bitch niggas
that's still in denial.

- Yeah, dope on that.
- Uh-hmm.

Put a sponge on that.

They call me boomerang dick
because I come on back.

They going out
for the mom like...

- Oh, yeah.
- Oh, yeah.

I'm going in like
two fingers on prom night.

I get my inspiration
from my folks and ancestors.

Me and my family
stick together

like thighs on pressure.

Bar.

My name is Rachel Cho.

But my friends call me Rache.

Pretty soon,
I'll be graduating from one

of the top universities
in the country.

I have so much
to look forward to.

I'm moving back in
with my parents

and I'll probably start
waiting tables

to help pay off
my student loans.

Surprisingly,
this is the same plan shared

by much
of my graduating class.

We're having to come
to terms with the fact

that college debt
does not miraculously blossom

into a promising career.

In fact, college debt
and promising careers

have no relation,
whatsoever.

I've maintained a 3.4 GPA

and done everything
I was told to do,

but I don't think
it's working.

You know
what's even more depressing?

Reading the blog of a felon
who's more optimistic

about his future
than I am of mine.

I'm talking about a man
who spent...

- Careful.
- ...more years

in confinement
than I've been alive.

This is nuts.

And he has a clear vision

for his future
than anyone I know.

More, more, more, more.

Including my professors.

Stop.

I have to meet this man
face to face.

Got it.

My final film assignment

is a 10-minute short

which explores the contrast
between my bleak...

Hello?

...uncertainty
as a soon-to-be college grad

and the adrenalizing
confidence of a convict

soon to be paroled from here.

The Miami-Daye
Correctional Facility.

The optimism
in your blog is...

Hotter than Sriracha.

That works too.

It's actually what inspired me
to interview you.

If that shit inspired you,

I got this seminar called,
"What You See Is What You Saw."

That shit go hard
in the paint.

Can you perform some of it?

Maybe I can put it
in my short.

I can a little bit.

I can make you a little...
hot little 10-minute set.

Okay.
Here go a little piece I just...

I just finished off.

But it's a little story of hope.

I once knew this kid,
10-year-old boy,

and his parents
named him Monica.

They thought naming him Monica
would help build character.

And they spelled the shit
M-Y-N-I-G-G-A, Monica.

All right, TJ.
Sit the fuck down.

Oh, I asked him to perform
a little bit of his seminar.

Yes, ma'am.
And I'm telling him to do it

with his ass in the seat.

Make me say it again, there's
not gonna be an interview.

Actually, come tomorrow
and collect that Gate Money,

- so you know.
- What's "Gate Money?"

You give like a hundred
dollars in a bus ticket.

You know what I'm saying?
When you get out of prison,

this is the way
if you want, you know.

We can do this interview
in the fresh air

while I smoke my Newport.

- What did I say, TJ?
- I'm sitting down.

All right.
I'm sitting down.

- Come on.
- I was sitting down.

- Roll over.
- That's what I was doing.

Nigga, hold up.
Look, wait, wait, hold up.

Are you serious? Excuse me.

Turn over, TJ.
Turn over.

You're getting
this shit on camera?

You're getting
this shit on camera?

- You see how they do?
- Why are you trying

to fuck this up, TJ?
You're fucking it up.

- Okay.
- What is your problem?

We have a permit to film this.

Do you have
a permit to film me?

I do not think so.
Shut that thing off.

Serious?

- See how they do?
- You got him.

Enjoy.

- Hey.
- Prime time TV.

I appreciate you sticking up
for a nigga, you know, but...

this is what they do.

You know, they'll come tomorrow,
TJ on their skip duty. Heard me?

Shouldn't Officer Layne
be reported for kicking you?

What about the next inmate?

What about him?

Let's say I file a complaint,
it make it all the way up

to the Inspector
General's office.

Still it's my word
against white folks.

First time in my life,
I can see the light

at the end
of the fucking tunnel.

It ain't just some nigga burning
a cigarette in the dark.

You heard me?

So, I got to decide.

Do I want justice
or do I want freedom?

- Why not both?
- Both?

You're a vegan
or something, huh?

Well, she wild as shit.

People always seem amazed
with the fact

that I could be so, you know,

I could be such a visionary
from behind these walls.

Anything is possible,
understand? You can do it.

It's just like...
it's like prison pussy,

you know, you just got
to use your imagination.

You need to get good to you.

Niggas just think
you just walk up

out the prison like you do
in a movie.

And I got a lot to prove, man.

A lot to prove.

You know, because there's
a lot of folks out there,

they think I ain't shit
but a runaway hamster, you know,

because the nigga keep
getting put back in that cage.

When I get up out this bitch,
I'ma be like stripper glitter.

Nigga, I'm rubbing off
on everybody.

Heard me?

Two minutes.

I heard you put you
on your bathtub

I got to do a last minute review
on my pre-release plan

to make sure a nigga
capitalizing on all the options

available to me
when I'm on the outside.

This way...

Uh, no. Cameras
are not allowed in here.

But, Ms. Judy, it's the
documentary starring me.

So, obviously, the cameras
got to go where I go.

Last I checked,
you're the subject

of a 10-minute student film
not The Green Mile.

- Okay. Can they just...
- Uh, uh-uh, uh-uh, no.

Can they... can they film
a nigga from the hallway?

Come here.

Don't ever use that word
in front of me again.

- Yes, Ms. Judy.
- Okay. Back up.

You wanna get him down?

- Thank you.
- Wait, wait.

Y'all just got to lay
in the cut, okay?

Get one camera here

then you get another camera here
like this, right?

And be phantom
because it's like

that "catch the predator shit."
Heard me?

Hmm.
You dye your hair?

- No.
- No.

Mr. Jackson, you haven't filed
for any housing aid.

You don't qualify
for any child tax credits

or disability related benefits.

What are your plans
for employment?

Oh, I'ma just... I'm really
just gonna start my company,

follow my calling
being a life coach,

motivational speaker,
well-renowned.

Uh, okay.

Have you contacted
your family,

arranged for room and board

or would you like us
to help you with that?

Y'all kidding, right?

My family probably waiting
for me outside right now.

Okay. When it comes
to the Jackson family,

I'm Michael, okay?

They're probably gonna throw
a big old block party for me.

Supposed to be a secret,
but you know how it is,

- hood niggas talk.
- Language.

Copy that. I'ma get me

a cool little spot
in The Wood.

Give me a sec.

Uh, Hollywood, Florida.

Yeah, you know,
caught me a whip.

- And that's?
- Vehicle.

- Yeah.
- Uh-huh.

I am a CLS
for the department.

Uh, Communications
and Linguistics Specialist.

One of the things
we discovered

was a major disconnect

between inmates and COs,
uh, Corrections Officers,

primarily due
to the street vernacular

that is used by inmates
in prison.

So, I was a natural fit
to step in and to translate.

It's gonna be like they throw
a Scar Mitzvah for me.

You know,
it's gonna be like that.

Uh, it's the party you throw

when you sue the state
for police brutality and win.

- Yeah. Right. So, then...
- Hang on.

The kids are... could you...

Uh, my job is to make sure

that each inmate's transition

back to civilian life
is smooth and practical.

And usually they move from here
to a "halfway home" to help them

with that transition back
to civilian life.

But, um, Mr. Jackson

opted to spend
his halfway time

here at the prison.

I have never seen him
get a visitor.

Uh, he hasn't had
any phone calls.

He maybe had one letter

and that's what prompts
my concerns.

Without a community
to lean on,

prisoners usually end up

back here with us...

for another round.

Most y'all know me as TJ.
Heard me?

But my government name
is Tijuana Jackson.

Life coach with a goon-hand,

motivational speaker,
real nigga shit.

Now look, I know Ms. Judy
usually don't like this,

but maybe since
it's my last day...

Ah, don't even try it.

- Nope.
- Okay. Uh, just checking.

He knows better.
He's just, uh...

showboating for the cameras.

Mr. Jackson is one
of our more colorful inmates.

He fancies himself
a life coach

and a lot of the inmates
do look up to him.

He has helped me
just talk some sense

into some of these jits.

Who said
we can want

- Don't make me get loud.
- Some bullshit.

I got this sentence,
you know,

for siphoning gas
out a school bus.

The shit was really like
a little misdemeanor, you know.

But it escalated to a felony,
you know what I'm saying?

Because nigga's
smoking a cigarette

therefore endangering
the lives of the kids

that were still on the bus,

short bus, whatever it was.

You know, with me and TJ,

we grew up together,
you know?

Roach, Judy boss,
Judy boss, your boy on TV.

Don't mine he's small.

You know,
he thinks big, very big.

He's good people.
He's good people.

I got my sentence
reduced to 10 months,

but statistics say
that I'm likely to return

to this slave track, okay?

Let me tell you something.

I ain't coming back.
Y'all could have that.

Product of the state.

So ill I bleed HAZMAT.

Fucking with a Beast.

Savage. Beast.

Beast. That Beast.

Y'all don't know that one yet.

You're gonna know that shit
when my mixtape drop.

Better believe that shit.
Heard me?

The PPRP is 100%
volunteer-based.

Some programs rescue
any species of animal.

But this one here
is a dog's only rescue.

What's good, Chance?

Huh?

I named her Chance
because it's very rare

a black man
gets a seventh chance.

Did you say
a second chance?

No, I said a seventh chance.

Come on, girl. Come on.

She's smarter than
my ex-girlfriend,

I tell you that.
Raise yourself.

Show me that Mayweather.
You want this, huh?

Show me that Mayweather.

Stop and freeze,
stop and freeze.

Huh, what you got?

You got heat on you, huh?

You holding?

Good girl.
Good girl. Good girl.

Come here.
Come here, Chance.

He's done
an exceptional job with her.

Not always, man.
I done...

I done stepped on her tail.

I done stepped on her paw.

I done all kind of crazy.

I'm not incriminating
myself, am I?

No, you're fine.

But I've done
all kind of stuff to her.

Heard me? She ain't...
she ain't never had no grudge.

She just let that shit go.
Now, she about to be free.

Meanwhile,
there's niggas in here

getting shanked
over correctional cake.

What's correctional cake?

Oh, it's cake
made from crushed Oreos,

peanut butter, and M&Ms.

But as I was saying
before she interrupted

my fucking monologue...

we don't hold grudges,
do we, Chance?

Grudges hold us, huh?

You fucking seen me.

Open the fucking...
I see you.

I know you fucking seen me.

Get off me.
Get the fuck off me.

Get off, nigga.
Get the fuck.

- It's beyond my control.
- It's bullshit.

I asked them. I asked them.
I asked them when I got my ERD.

Why y'all ain't tell me then?

Because I thought
it was gonna work out.

I always talk about closure.

I tried really hard.

He deserves Chance,

but the Prison Pet
Rescue Program

doesn't service civilians

and they would not
make an exception

for Mr. Jackson
even though I asked.

Prison is a bitch.

But they won't let you take
that bitch with you.

Don't let her
chew her hot spots.

- Heard me?
- Uh-hmm.

- Okay?
- Uh-hmm.

And don't breed her.

I don't want them other mutts
shoving their cock off

in my dog like that.
She ain't no Instagram ho.

Don't worry as such, bro.

It's Upgrade
you're dealing with, you know.

I want you
to give her like half

a Nutraloaf in the morning.

You get them out
the chow hall.

give her
the other half at night.

- Uh-hmm.
- You dig?

And you got to give
a whole lot of water

in between meals,
'cause that Nutraloaf

- will shank your asshole.
- Brethren, it's family.

This is like my little sister
with blood.

Anything interfere with us,
bleed.

Bleed.
Nigga, you can't...

nigga, if you do...
if you do that, nigga,

you're gonna end up in IMU.

If you end up in IMU,

she's gonna end up
in that bean slot.

Heard me?
Look, Upgrade, Upgrade.

No, no, no, no.
Listen, man.

You got to treat her life...

you got to treat her life
like it's your life.

You do that,
you ain't gonna believe

what you get out of it, man.

Nigga, nigga,
I'm about to be free, nigga.

And when I catch you
on the outside,

- I got work for you.
- Good.

- Okay?
- Uh-hmm.

Full-time life coach
assistant, okay?

- Full salary.
- Okay.

- Benefits with it, okay?
- Got you.

And all the roti
you can eat, you dig?

You can't get this
kind of respect

unless you're a chief.
Heard me?

I fucked you
in your ass good, didn't I, TJ?

You bitch. Come on.
Tell me you like it.

Can you all edit that out?

♪ Woo ♪

♪ Woo ♪

They probably caught up in that
Fort Lauderdale traffic.

They'd be here.

So, should we just conduct
the interview here?

Is that okay?

I thought you all wanted
to get my family in?

Had a whole family
in the interview?

Mr. Jackson,
this is my cameraman, Justin.

What's up, homie?

Hey, you fuck black guys?

Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Hold up.

Hey, I'll tell you
all something.

Can a nigga catch a ride
with you all?

Well, it's getting kind of late
and we have to drive all...

Shotgun, homie.

I called it, shotgun.

They sent me this shit
right before I got popped.

It said,
"Dear Mr. Tijuana Jackson,

Toastmasters reality show
is seeking contestants

to participate
in our nationally televised

speakers competition program.

They must... they must have
found me from my blog.

I thought inmates
weren't allowed

to have computers in prison?

They're not.

So, how did you maintain a blog?

Hey.

Hey, fam, is she gonna talk
through the whole thing?

It ain't
but 10 minutes long, huh?

Do you mind
not smoking in my car, please?

- Thank you.
- It's menthol.

Take a right after the light.

Right here, take a right here
because this... yeah.

This Toastmaster reality show

was like shark tank
of public speakers.

They put a nigga on the map.
Heard me?

Hey, black cop.
What up, nigga?

Oh, yeah.

That's the homie.

Built this whole empire
collecting them cans.

I'm gonna build my empire off
this Toastmaster thing.

That's how I'm gonna get
my motivational speaking career

off the block
and then you can see

by this dope head architecture
this is Hollywood, Florida.

I told you all they was
gonna be waiting for me.

Now you can get your interview.

Hold my shit.

What up, momma?

What you do now, Junior?

Nothing. They're just here
to film my homecoming party.

Party?

I'm supposed to celebrate you
getting out of jail

and let the whole neighborhood

- know my son is a felon?
- Momma.

They already know that, Momma.

Excuse me.

If it ain't no party,
why is she...

why is she dressed like that?

Dressed like what?

Like you
Martha Stewart's house, nigga.

Why are you dressed
like a homeless fam?

Junior,
why are all these folks

following you around
with these cameras?

Momma, they're making
a movie about me.

That's Rachel
and that's her white friend.

Y'all making
a movie about Junior?

Just a short movie, ma'am.

- Goddamn, these mosquitoes.
- Watch your mouth, boy.

Copy that.
What's wrong with her?

Late for work.
Lil Eric out of control,

can't tell him nothing.
Well, let me talk to him.

- Where he at?
- I don't know.

He out there running
with them hoodlums.

He running with... Sharea.

- Where my nephew?
- Leave me alone.

I bet you I find him.

What'd you all do
with my BB gun?

- I don't need your help.
- Junior. Stop.

You just got out of jail.

Where is it?

- Uh-uh. Come on now.
- Oh, no, no, no, no.

Goddamn, Sharea.
This shit cost me $4.

Yeah, but you just
sit your slow ass down.

You just got out of jail.
I'm about to call Big Eric.

- Oh, y'all on speaking terms?
- Not really.

Her baby daddy,
he don't give a shit

about his own son, it's to claim
little nigga on his income tax.

Should have named
little nigga W-2, heard me?

If she... I go away,
do a little bid.

She can't look
after her own son. Know why?

'Cause she too busy
trying to get that eggplant

- off the Internet.
- I know you did not

- just say that.
- I said what I said.

Okay. Let me tell you
all something.

Don't get this thing
twisted, okay?

I'm the only person
in this family with a degree.

When I was pregnant,
I went back to school

- to get my bachelors, okay?
- Okay. Ask her who paid for it.

Now meanwhile, this fool
right here in other news,

he done went backwards,
State pen University,

State pen University.

Ask her... ask her
who paid for the damn degree.

- It don't matter.
- TJ.

It don't...
let me tell you all something.

TJ.

Sit down.

And you stop too.

Excuse me. Can we go now?

Come on, baby.

- Thank you.
- Thank you.

Watch out, hon.

That's Rukus, he's a cool,
little motherfucker.

He don't like black people
but he think I'm Dominican.

Go back inside
and get you some juice.

I'll be back.

My children, I don't know

what I'm gonna do with them.

Momma, you know
can't nobody tell TJ nothing.

I taught you all
better than that.

You all is plural.
Don't include me in his mess.

Are you serious?
No. Why?

Because I asked for somebody

to cover my shift
for 20 minutes?

All he had to do was say,
"No, ma'am."

Sharea? You ain't gonna offer
the white people no juice?

Oh, get the hell
off this, boy.

Hey, we're gonna finish
this conversation

- before you go home. Hear me?
- We don't have a home.

What you mean?

Quit acting like
it's your business.

- Quit acting like you care.
- I don't care?

You got me twisted
with Big Eric, boy.

Have I ever one time...
have I ever one time

missed one of your debates?

Yes.

- Because I was in jail, right?
- Whatever.

Well, nigga, don't act like
it ain't a good excuse.

Anytime I was out of jail,
I was at this nigga's debates.

So, what're you gonna do now,

play good uncle
for a couple of weeks

- then go back to jail?
- That's what you want?

No, but that's what
always happens.

Lil Eric,
get your ass in this house.

Can I...

I can't even talk
to my damn nephew.

I'll tell you, man.
We got this thing in prison

called peek-a-boos, right?

And what it is,
is when you really wanna

humiliate a motherfucker,
you push your dick

between their legs,
make them blow you from the back

this way when you cum
you can shit in his face.

I tell you,
that shit is humiliating.

Hey. Oh.

Momma said you need those
and this is from me.

You get these
from the Indian Reservation?

Yeah. Why?

So, you're gonna go all the way
to the damn Reservation

and you can't come scoop
a nigga from the joint?

In what, nigga?

I looked the fucking
Underground Railroad to you?

What happened to your car?

Mind your business.

- Where did you find Lil Eric?
- Mind your business.

It ain't a man's business
to speak

on another man's business.

Well, you ain't much of a man.

So, we don't have that problem.

At least I ain't no snitch.

Okay. See.

this is exactly why he ain't
gonna get no gold seal.

This motherfucker
got his freedom,

but still operating
on the outside

like his ass is in prison.

Black fucker.

Welcome home.

- What you watching?
- Fight.

And you got school
in the morning?

- No. School closed out.
- What, teachers on strike?

Sewage backed up
and flooded the first floor.

Started to smell
like grandma's bed pan.

I thought they fixed
that shit last year?

Uh-uh.
They just moved the gym

to the second floor
and served lunch outside.

But everybody
started getting sick,

so the health department
shut it down

after a few people died.

Why you ain't transfer
to a different school then?

Uh-hmm. We tried,
but there wasn't enough room.

Hmm, I'm cool with it though.

Florida's finest.

God, I didn't know
you're gonna bring

- these cameras with you.
- This is my room.

Not anymore.
Momma said I could use it.

Now, get out.

Where am I supposed
to sleep, Sharea?

Sleep? I'm still waiting on you
to wake the fuck up.

Bitch, I've asked you nicely.

Get the fuck back.

You know Lil Eric out there
sleeping on the sofa, huh?

I know. He don't like
to sleep in here.

- Goddamn.
- Why not?

You just don't want me
to shit in peace, do you?

We got the whole room smelling
like Michael Moore asshole.

Fuck you, TJ.

Light a goddamn match.

Tropic thunder
all in the hood and shit.

- Mr. Jackson?
- Show's over.

You can go home now.

Is this the same house?

I guess they mowed the lawn.

Most of it, anyway.

I thought you all
would be gone by now.

All the shit
you all done see.

You all really
trying to fuck with TJ, huh?

- You like being on TV?
- No.

You do now.
Show me the carburetor.

Um...

What the fuck you pointing at,
little nigga?

It ain't no carburetor.
It's fuel injected, boy.

Lil Eric?

Boy, you got me walking

all over this house
looking for you.

Where did you sleep last night?

In the car with Uncle TJ.

Okay. Well, baby,
unless you want mama

to break both your damn ankles,

you're gonna need to let me know

before you leave
out this house, okay?

Thank you.

And why can't your ass
park on the street

like regular fucking people?

Damn get... you don't have shit.

Try it now.

Well, hold on, nigga,
before you flood it.

Try it now.

Hey, go park it over there.

Got my first DUI
when he's like 10 years old.

Little nigga been driving
ever since.

Fuck Uber.

Shit.

What happened?

You ain't get a copy
of your parole release rules?

I couldn't get my car to start.
That's why I'm late.

What's this?
What's the camera crew?

- Uh...
- You ain't filming

- no porn shit, are you?
- No. Hey.

Say hi, Lil Eric.

- Hey.
- Hey, Lil Eric.

Your shirt... put a shirt on.

Three hundred dollars
a month in court cost.

Fifty dollars
to the crime victims right fund.

Ten dollars a month for a year,

eleven dollars a month
to pay for my CCs

and I got to pay
for UAs too, though?

- That's a decent payment plan.
- For who?

Well, how much're they paying
for your little life story?

That's classified.

Uh-uh. Hey. You, two.

Come here. Come here.

What are you all
really filming?

You know, being TJ's PO...

is frustrating, you know,

because he got a lot
of potential, you know?

But he stay doing
some stupid shit.

So you gonna go
closed caption on a nigga?

I'm trying
to help you earn a living

and you're steady
blowing wolf tickets.

- But Cheryl.
- Don't touch me.

Got... you know what?
Hey, hey.

I don't know when Cheryl
got the SuperGluing

her asshole like that.

But let me tell
y'all something...

- Nigga, perimeters.
- Hey, hey, she wasn't

this uptight back
in high school. Hear me?

She used to manage
rappers and shit.

- Remember Wonder Dyke?
- Oh.

♪ Love dick. Hate men. Yeah ♪

♪ Might suck dick now and
again, but we ain't friends ♪

She was cold as fuck.
What happened to her?

She was... she was tight.
She grew up.

She got married.
She has some twins.

What about you?

Have you coordinated
one job interview yet?

Interview for what, Cheryl?

I'm gonna build
my motivational company

from the floor up until
it blow up and get my dough up.

How you gonna eat?
How you gonna pay bills, hmm?

How you gonna
stay off them blocks?

By being the world's
coldest life coach.

- That's how.
- You better find that bridge.

You better find that bridge

because you ain't about
to be idol on my watch.

Oh, I'm gonna
be somebody's idol.

- You can count on that.
- And you can count on me

taking your ass back to jail
if you stay unemployed.

- I mean that.
- Okay. Hey, hey, hey, Lil E.

Lil E.
Lil E, what's old boy's name?

The Tech Jew
went on the internet,

the entrepreneur and got rich.

- He'll never know.
- Evan Spiegel?

No, the one that be
with all the Asian gals.

- Oh, I know.
- Mark Zuckerberg?

That nigga. Yeah.

Go on Mark Zuckerberg page
and tell him

that Cheryl said
that he's unemployed.

- Let me know what he say.
- No. Don't tell him that.

I ain't say that.
You the one on probation.

Yeah. Okay. But nobody
wanna hide no ex-felon

and that's why I'm trying
to explain to you, Cheryl.

You got a list of companies
that do just that, TJ.

Yeah. But that list...
that list ain't as long

as the list of companies
that I worked for

when I was inside the joint.

And that's real nigga shit.
Heard me?

Yow, I might as well
talk to a fucking corpse

because this,
this one don't listen.

Okay. I'ma be a rich corpse.
Heard that?

I promised Momma Jackson
that I was gonna do my best

to keep TJ out of prison
and that's what I'm gonna do.

I'm gonna do my best
to keep TJ out of prison.

- Stop ear hustling.
- Cheryl don't do shit.

I'm not talking to you.
I'm talking to them.

- It's about me, though.
- Okay. As I was saying...

- It's about me though.
- ...this is what we're gonna

do starting bright
and early tomorrow morning,

I'ma be on TJ's doorstep
every single day until he finds

himself a job. And you know
what? I'ma personally drive

him to every single interview
because that's, that's what

- I'm... is that a check?
- Can I... Can I just... can I

- show you something? No.
- Is it a check stub?

- No. Okay. No. Okay.
- Is it proof of employment?

Wait. But wait a minute.
Wait a minute. Hold on.

Okay. Well, then there's
nothing that I need to see.

The Toastmasters... if the
Toastmasters came to you

and said I want you
to be on a reality show.

Does that not say something
about your credentials?

Nice talk, TJ.
I'ma see you tomorrow,

- all right?
- I... you just...

Do you think your Uncle
would make a great life coach?

Don't show up
when I blow up.

I don't know.

You can't be a failure
and a life coach

at the same time.

What's wrong, Junior?

I, as in Insurgents.

J as in Jamiroquai.
Yes, ma'am.

Yes.
Jackson.

Yeah.
That's right.

Uh-hmm.

So how many contestants
do y'all usually have?

Okay.
Uh-hmm.

Well, how did Toastmasters
find me, anyway?

Oh, yes.

Okay.

No. Yes, ma'am, I did.
Yes, I am.

Uh-hmm.

No, thank you.
Okay.

Toastmasters just left
a little message.

Your sister won't sign
the release waiver

for a documentary.

Fuck, I don't want her
to be in my shit, no way.

But some of our best material
is with you and Lil Eric.

It's the heart of our story.

Shit. Give it to me.
I'll sign it.

No.
Lil Eric is a minor.

We need a signature
from his legal guardian.

Is that Sharea?

You think we can get her
to sign up before we leave?

Before you leave?

- Well...
- We have everything

that we need.

So you...

you're gonna end the show
in the middle

of the fucking cliffhanger?

Y'all don't wanna see a nigga
go from baboon to tycoon?

Mr. Jackson,
we actually didn't intend

to film as much as we did.

But you did. I mean, you past
that whole fucking

10-minute class assignment.

Now you're in that Spielberg,
Tyler Perry level shit

with all the footage
you done got.

Yes. But that wasn't
the assignment.

Oh.
Oh.

Oh.
Oh, okay.

Oh, I see. College,
College Education

got you trained
real good. I get it.

- Okay. I get it.
- What does that mean?

No. Just means that your
professor told you to do

a 10-minute assignment, right?

And you happened into a full
length feature blockbuster,

but all you can think about
is little 10-minute project

that he told you to do,
right?

Well, maybe if
you did what you were told,

you'd spend less time
in jail.

Oh.
Wow.

Spunky little Wild Child,
huh?

Well, let me tell you
something.

You're a little younger.
You might not get this.

But you don't need bars
to be in prison.

You gotta ask yourself,
"Why is it a nigga fresh out

the joint can see
a brighter future for you

than you can see
for yourself?" Hmm?

How's that for confinement?

You wanna hear some music?

What music?
Your music?

- Yeah.
- No.

It's obvious
you don't have a plan.

- Would you like to hear mine?
- Okay. Look, first of all,

don't be rolling your eyes at me
because I ain't your momma.

And if you tell me your plan,
don't tell it to me like you

think you're smarter than me.

Uh-hmm.
First things first.

You have at least 10,000
followers on Prison Logic.

- Uh-hmm.
- That's his blog?

- Yup.
- That many followers?

- Are you sure?
- I'm the one who maintains it,

I think.

Can I talk to my nephew
off camera for a minute, please?

- Can you step outside, please?
- Yeah. Let's go.

You can't be snitching.

- I'm not.
- You just told her

that I got you maintaining my
blog while I'm inside the joint.

- But it's true.
- Yeah. Okay.

Well, just don't talk
about it on camera, okay?

Now, now, look, I'm talking
to you like a man, okay?

Because your momma
can't do it, okay?

You see that white girl
over there?

She's not white.
She's Asian.

Okay. Whatever. Well,
she's so black curious,

she's probably gonna let me hit.

But you got to make me
look good.

- Make you look good?
- Man, just tell me your plan.

Well, the first thing
you should do is make

an announcement on your blog.

Let all your followers
know you're out

and starting your own
consultation business.

Post it all over
the Internet.

But you just can't rely
on social media.

You have to connect
with the people.

You have to campaign
and let the people

know you're the real deal.

Make flyers, go door
to door, shake hands,

kiss babies.

I like that.

Uh-huh.

You know what? Okay.

Let me tell you something,
man.

Look, I know you
ain't been hearing

from your daddy lately
and then your momma

having a tough time.
But,

you know, it don't mean
that they don't love you,

you hear me?

I know.

Okay. I like your plan though,
that's good.

Come on. Let's go.

All right.
Sometimes that seatbelt

don't lock in so if it don't,
just sit safe, okay?

Now, look, I just heard
my nephew's plan,

I'll tell you the truth,
okay?

Okay. It would be perfect plan
if we were selling Girl Scout

cookies.

This means I'm gonna stick
to my initial blueprint,

okay? What I'ma do
is I'll make an announcement

on my blog, okay?
Let all my followers know

that I'm out the joint
and the nigga launching

his own consultation company.

And in fact, I'm gonna post
that shit all over the internet.

- I just said that.
- But I can't just rely

on social media, see?
So what I'ma do is I got...

I got to connect
with the people

on the grass roots level.
You know what I'm saying?

So what I should do
is I got to print flyers,

I gotta go door to door,
I got to shake hands,

I gotta kiss babies.
Heard me?

Okay. Let's get started.

I got another spot.

Hey, y'all interested
in some motivational speaking?

Some life coaching?

I can come to y'all schools
and talk.

How would you feel about
yourself knowing you cheated

on a woman that you spent
so much time choosing?

I just now realize
how much I am insecure.

My situation, my daughter
made a choice for me

not to date anyone.

Well, nigga,
she's your daughter.

My girlfriend dumped me
in a foreign country.

So, you know Hakeem
on Little Chicken?

Yeah. Them niggas
doing like 12 years

in MKT for kidnapping
and armed robbery.

I told her she's like,
"Oh, look at me."

I'm like, "Bitch,
look at me. Shit.

Your love bubbles
and banging.

I'm fucking up here with
the white girl ass and shit.

I'm enjoying
this motherfucker.

And he ain't even reply back.
I'm like, "Look, nigga,

all asses look the same bent
over. Thank you.com."

People should be with you
by choice

not by manipulation.

You've been through your
share of pain.

But it's not up
to your daughter

to determine
your healing process.

I had just seen him,
went home,

and the nurse
had called and said,

"You know, your dad wants
you to come up here."

You want wife,
a side chick,

but you're ruining
your family for one.

Well, when you say it like
that, it sounds very dumb.

Well, at that point,
I will agree.

- You don't like questions?
- No.

Especially questions
from the people that love you.

I just sit and think
that he would,

you know, actually ever

really pass away.

Life is like a vending
machine, man.

It's full of change.

So you got to be wise
about your smacks.

You're on this green grass

looking beautiful, okay?

You find a way
to point out stars

and flat asses.

One thing you learn
in prison,

it's not about the size
of the ass,

it's the size
of the asshole.

We rather our kids go to
school and ask questions

than come home
and ask questions.

And that's the problem.
You are meditating more

on a daily basis...

about your history
than you are about your future,

and then you ask yourself
why you keep finding niggas

that can't appreciate
flat asses.

Y'all getting this?

This is good shit.

I'm
give you an assignment.

Lil E, we're getting low
on flyers.

Just put them
on a nice card.

That's the way
you promote a business.

Let's do some more.

You heard that quote
I told that one girl?

Which quote?
There were so many.

"Just because someone admires
you for your integrity

doesn't mean
they have integrity."

It's one of my favoriteas.

People really took
your advice to heart.

I should've made a hundred
and thirty-seven dollars

off that shit too.

How?

you got no pocket,
do you think

I can get like
five dollars from you?

Can I hold $20?

Can I please hold $20?

So, you're actually
asking for $20?

You got like $20 I can hold?

Hold?
Like just a hold?

Were you talking
to my daughters?

- You are a fake coach.
- Yeah.

I was just telling them
that I can speak at they school.

You got three dollars,
you got four dollars.

- You got some change?
- I don't... I... my wallet is on...

is on the beach with my towel.
You didn't say in the beginning

that it's gonna cost me
anything, you came up to me.

- Okay.
- I mean, you did a great job.

Can I just get, like...
you got... you got $10?

Don't give him any money.

Don't give him any money.

- Did you give him money?
- Lil Eric?

- Did you give him money?
- Come on.

I was just talking to this
man about my life problems

and he asked me for money.

Uh-huh.
- He took the money.

- They are with him.
- Come on, boy!

That's for you, little nigga.
You worked hard.

You.

That is my money.

Give me my money! Hey.

- You want to run?
- Put on your seatbelt, boy.

Give me my money.
You cannot run!

You cannot... hey. Hey.

Hey.
What's your problem?

You cannot run.

If I had my gun
I'd whoop that nigga ass.

Give me my money.

Lil Eric, don't you
miss being in school?

I'm not missing nothing.

You're not concerned
with Lil Eric

- not being at school?
- Excuse me.

- Do you have a permit?
- Sorry.

Do you have a permit?

Hey.

All you get taught
in these lower income

public schools is how to fade
on Sharkeesha.

I went to public school,
I did fine.

Is that right? How much you
wanna bet this little nigga

- right here smarter than you?
- How?

Let me ask you this.
Okay.

There's three birds
sitting on a wire,

I take out my pistol,
I shoot one of the birds

on the wire, how many birds
left on the wire?

What will be the proper
response to that question?

- Ooh.
- I'm not talking to you,

Lil Eric.
Come on now, Wild Child.

What am I missing?
I don't get it.

Think about it, okay?

There's three birds
on the wire,

I pull out the duel-y,
bust it on one.

- Ah! Me.
- I get it.

No birds because the sound
of the gunshot would scare off

the other two birds?

- Is that right?
- Ooh.

- What?
- Yes, Lil Eric?

The proper response would be
to ask another question.

- Uh-hmm.
- Why are you shooting

at the bird? Are you hungry,
Mr. Jackson?

Would you like
something to eat?

Hmm.

Assembly line response.

Human response.

I don't know what you think
you learned. Shit.

Oh, shit.

- What's going on?
- Oh, shit.

Damn. Shit.

Okay.

Goddamn.

Shit.

Wait. Wait.

Look. Come here, boy.

Get over here.

Just hold on one second.
Wait a minute.

Oh, shit. Put your foot
on the brake, boy.

You're gonna put it in neutral
before hitting on the brake.

Well, take your foot off the
brake now and maybe you're gonna

break my back. It's rolling
back, but it

roll back give
a footing because my gators,

they slip.

So, you're saying
Lil Eric doesn't need to go

- to school?
- No, I'm saying the school

is supposed to be a place
of learning, right?

So, if 90% of the curriculum
is memorization,

what exactly have you learned?

You might learn
how to memorize

but have you learned
how to learn?

Justin, get your ass out
of the car and help push.

Just like that, Lil Eric.

We got to get some gas.

Come on, boy.

For the first time
in my life,

I found myself rethinking

everything I memorized,

everything I thought
I'd ever learned,

who taught it to me and why.

Man, I tell you, you know.

Don't get it twisted,
there ain't a sentimental bone

in my body, you know,
but me and Cheryl,

we was cool.
We had like...

this motherfucker
is just trying to sabotage me.

Goddamn, Momma.
That's why I don't like

nobody in my room.

Who left the phone off
the hook?

I'm out there beating
the pavement all day trying

to get the phone to ring,
I come home,

the phone off the hook.

When I get my money up,
man, I'm getting me a iPhone

with a gang of minutes.

You didn't leave my phone
off the hook, did you?

Yes the fuck I did
'cause don't nobody call it

but bill collectors
and telemarketers

and it's getting
on my damn nerves.

How'd y'all do today?

I'll let Uncle TJ tell it.

You were very optimistic
when you first left prison.

- How do you feel now?
- Well, it's obvious

we had some setbacks today
but like we say in prison,

"If it ain't ISIS,
it ain't a crisis." Heard me?

Four more Lil Eric, then go
down and do your push-ups.

I can't.

What?

I've got it.

I've got it.
I've got it.

That's what I thought.

Now go down and do four
push-ups like I showed you.

We don't use that language
around here, boy,

especially when TJ home.

And when Cheryl come here
tomorrow, I'm gonna tell her ass

straight up that I ain't
gonna apply for no damn gigs.

TJ work for TJ.

Can't take me out the plastic
and put me back in the box

like some of these
collectible niggas.

That's why we ain't together
now. Good job, wardy.

Go and get you a meal.

Momma.

I think if I show people
some of my writings,

I might give them a good idea
of what I'm capable of,

this
my seminar called

"What You See
Is What You Saw ."

Shit might be a good title
for this documentary.

- Is it published?
- It's not yet but once

this movie come out,
watch what happens.

Hey, we gotta go
before Cheryl get here.

Where are you going?
I can't go with you?

Junior?

Is that you out there?

This one's hotter.
It's a little hotter, Momma.

Here, just... okay.

- I'll just put it right here.
- Ooh, all right.

All right.

Oh, thank
you, baby.

- Ooh, and...
- Okay.

And empty my bedpan,
please.

Momma, act like
you got some shame.

There's cameras in here.

Oh, boy.

When the last time
y'all emptied this out?

About a week ago
when Oprah's on "The Butler."

You taking them things
on an empty stomach?

That's probably why you're
getting sick in the morning.

Get them out of here, boy.

You hungry?

Give this to your grandmomma.

Hey.

Hey.

Look early,
I'm impressed, TJ.

I get to spend the day
with you.

- I was looking forward to it.
- Oh, man.

- You look nice.
- Aw, thank you.

Look at you.
You just... you know what?

Uh-uh. Uh-uh.
Uh-uh.

Hey.
Y'all two.

I'm feeling a little
cooperative today,

TJ and I showered up early.
Come on.

Y'all wanna rode?
Catch them glimpses

- of his little life?
- I told you.

You ain't tell me and then
you was over there messing

- with that other girl.
- She was messing with me.

I was just doing
what I had to do.

- You know she got shot.
- Yeah. Uh-hmm.

Lost her leg.

Yeah. I heard.
I heard.

I thought she lost her leg
with diabetes.

That's what they said

but she started
stripping again,

- so I...
- Oh with a little specialty shot

what they do
on the amputees.

- Yeah.
- Yup.

That shot
make a lot of money.

Give me that.

Oh, my God.
Thank you.

I try not to deal
with that kind of,

negative environment
anymore, you know?

You know, I try
to stay positive.

I'm back in church.

I have to make sure
the job don't take...

part of me,
take hold of me,

you know?
What the focus is...

with you is to really...

hey, Sharlene.

But let me tell you
something about Sharlene,

Sharlene...

Sharlene got three jobs.

How old he tell you
he was?

How old?
What did he say?

- I think like 32.
- What?

No. I said... no.

I said it's been 32 years

since I've been to juvie.

- Don't let her fool you.
- Don't listen to the...

Don't let Cheryl fool you.
Just so you know,

- okay?
- I wonder, uh... listen.

She might look young
but let me tell you something.

Cheryl got that
vintage pussy.

Don't let her fool you.

She got that vintage
pussy, okay? She...

- MVP.
- She might be young

MVP.

That's what
it's there for.

- MVP.
- Uh-huh.

Okay. Uh-hmm.

You know, nigga.

Don't... listen.
This is...

this on camera,
take...

hey, take... you can take
that shit out.

- They can edit that out?
- Y'all gonna take that part out.

- Please do.
- Okay. Y'all can't handle that

'cause you're professional.

Exactly.

Go inside,
ask for application,

and I'mma have you
fill it out.

Hurry up,
ain't got all day.

Give me some nuts.

Okay. Age.

Same as you.

Shit.

Next is previous
job experience.

Telecommunications,
hotel management,

hotel reservations,
tilapia farming,

- toxic waste management.
- Wait.

- Pick one.
- For real?

Yeah.

Reasons
for leaving prior jobs?

What? What do you mean?

Why did you stop doing
telecommunications?

Because I got out
of prison.

Okay. Why did you
stop tilapia farming?

Because I got out
of prison.

What about
toxic waste management job?

- 'Cause I got out of prison.
- You got out of prison.

- Okay. All right. I get it.
- What the fuck I'd do

- with my lighter?
- Just use mine.

It's right in the glove
compartment, it's two in there.

- That's all filled out?
- That's everything.

- All right.
- All right.

Hey. Hey, hey,
hey, hey.

- What?
- What is that?

- This?
- Yeah. What's that?

- It's my mixtape.
- Nah, give it to me.

All right. Go ahead.

Tijuana Jackson.

Ex-convict turned
motivational speaker.

I'm a life coach
with a goon hand.

If you hit me on Twitter,

I help to get your life right.

Desired position?

Doggy style.

- That's it. I'm done.
- What?

- No, Cheryl.
- No, you play too much. No.

- I was in jail. Cheryl, come on.
- Fill it out for me.

No, you fill it out.

Wait. What's that?

You said to get an application.

No, no. Not that.
That. Those.

Why can't I get you
no flowers?

Oh, wait,
those are for me?

Well, you ain't
getting on my nerves

as much as I thought
you would.

Well, ditto, nigga.

'Cause you kind of
remind me the old days

- a little bit.
- Remember when

'cause you throw them
the rent party?

- Yeah. That's for you.
- Oh, thanks. Nice.

You ain't steal this,
did you?

Uh-uh. Let's fill out
this application.

They're pretty.

All right. So,

gonna see you tomorrow.

Will nigga got a choice?

You? I mean,
yeah, you...

get a job
or go back to prison.

That's the choice.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

All right.

- Bye.
- Bye-bye.

Hey, uh, TJ, thanks.

Oh, yeah.

I thought you like
the colors.

Yup. Yeah.

No, I like it.

Yellow

right.

You won't get
the fuck out of the car?

Momma.

Cameras on deck.

- Hey, unc.
- Hey.

Hey.

Did he find a job?

Doubt it.

What was that?

I got three messages.

Y'all are rolling...
y'all are rolling, right?

Hello, Mr. Jackson.

This is Robert Marshall
of Hollywood Carwash.

We reviewed your application.
Unfortunately, we're not...

Mr. Tijuana Jackson,

this is Wendy Reisman
from the...

99 Cent Store in Plantation.

You dropped off an application

earlier this afternoon
and a mixtape.

Was that intentional?

Mr. Tijuana Jackson, this is...

Brent Cobbler
calling in behalf

of Orlando's International
Toastmasters Club.

We would like
to congratulate you

on being selected
to audition for a spot

in this season's
Toastmaster's reality show.

You stand to win
a worldwide speaking career

and up to $50,000 in cash
and prizes.

If you are interested at all,

please give us a call
at 954-280...

4979. Look for Cindy.

I told you.

What the fuck did I tell you?
Did you...

did y'all get that...
did y'all get that on video?

Did you get that?
You get that?

- What did I tell you?
- Orlando?

- Disney World?
- Shh. Goddamn.

- What is it, Junior?
- Nothing, momma.

Just got me a job.
That's all.

Let me be the one to tell her
what it is, okay?

Goddamn.
Hold it down, nigga.

What'd I tell y'all?

What did I say?

Is it a progress,
only have one source of ID?

Okay.

Uh-hmm.

Yes, ma'am.

Oh, I'mma be there bright
and early.

No, thank you.

If you do an inventory check
of your thoughts,

85%, 95% of your thoughts
is negative.

You know I'm saying?
You have to un-niggafy

yourself and start
focusing on...

positive outcomes.

You gotta focus
on the positive possibilities

in order to produce
positive results.

What I'm not gonna do
is I'm not gonna let

a bad day dictate
the outcome

of my whole year.
Hear me?

I totally get it.

That's what's up.

And I still got a few
hurdles ahead of me,

you know, because...

my momma ain't
gonna approve of me just,

you know, running off
to Orlando like that.

And as a parolee,
I can't really just,

you know,
I gotta get permission

from my probation officer.

Because she ain't...

Speak of the devil.

What if I get
my shit rolling,

and make you my manager?

I give you 10%
off the top right to you.

I don't want 10%
of your pipedream.

That was high school.

Come on, we grown-ups now.

Okay. Note to self,
real quick.

Bagging groceries
are what grown-ups do,

- being a self-made...
- Travel permits denied.

You are not listening.
She is not listening.

I'm not listening.
I'm not gonna put my job

in jeopardy
for you anymore.

She about the dumbest deputy
this side of Broward County.

Wait a minute.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

- Get out.
- Cheryl,

I just gave you an
opportunity to be somebody.

- You know what you said?
- Get out.

No, y'all get out first,
so y'all can see me

when I merk
on her ass, okay?

Get out.

You all get
the fuck out, too.

Turn that camera off.

Errbody ain't gonna get
to play on the All-Star team,

you heard me? No one.
As long as I've known Cheryl,

that Cheryl problem.

The only future
she see for herself

is the future
that they laid out for her.

You heard me?
So it's hard for her to relate

to a visionary such as myself.

Let me tell y'all
something I've learned.

If you consistently feed
and exercise your faith,

it will eventually
outgrow your fears.

Today's billionaires,
they earn they billions

by taking chances
on the unknown,

while the rest of us stay
enslaved by the familiar.

Today, and as of today,

I'm strictly on my
billionaire ground,

and I denounce
that petty hustler.

Shit.

Hey, y'all got...
y'all got some change

or bus pass
a nigga can borrow?

What's up Lil Eric?

Nothin'.

Yo, this yo gal?

Darlene,
this is my Uncle TJ.

Hi.

She ain't white,
she light skinned, boy.

I'm half white.

No, with all them yams
on your plate.

She is
celebrating with us, Junior.

- God damn. Y'all made greens?
- Watch your mouth, boy.

Copy that.
What are we celebrating?

Didn't you just get a job?

- Too bad it's in Orlando.
- What?

- You shut up.
- Orlando?

Yeah, momma.
He tried to sneak down

to Orlando to be a Toastmaster.

I guess he too good
for us now.

If you don't wanna be
on camera,

all you gotta do
is shut your mouth.

- Fuck you.
- Momma, you heard her curse,

- right?
- Orlando, Junior? You know,

- my arthritis acting up.
- Momma, you gonna

- let her curse like that?
- What am I supposed to do?

You gonna let her curse
like that in front of company?

How come every time
I say a bad word.

'Cause you're
the eldest, Junior,

- and you should know better.
- God damn.

- Say it in front of the camera.
- Watch your mouth, Junior.

Why she get to curse
and I don't?

You heard her, Dick Gregory,
because you're old as hell.

I hope a porcupine
crawl up in your mouth

while you sleep
and take a shit.

You ain't going
to Orlando, Junior.

Momma, you want
the house with the pool?

This is how
I'm gonna get the house

with the pool for you.

You want me to get a job?

This is a legitimate job.

Junior, why don't
you date Cheryl?

Junior, why won't you pick up
Lil Eric from school?

Junior, why don't you go
pick up my meds?

What do y'all do
when I'm not here?

I'mma tell you
what they do.

They do just fine.

See, that's a
rhetorical question.

This ain't about me
going away,

this is about me
growing away.

They scared of that change,
they came...

they came to us with that
transformation.

Y'all ain't never made
this big a deal

- of me going to jail.
- Nigga, you chose jail.

Yeah, I'm choosing
this now, which is why

I got selected for the
Toastmasters reality show,

and somebody with
stretch marks did not.

- That's enough, Junior.
- I'm not talking about

your stretch marks, momma.
I'm talking about Sharea.

They didn't have no time
for a nigga

when he was in the joint,
now I'm outside,

they gonna try to tell me
what I could do.

You know I can't write
no letters

with this arthritis.

I can't even get on a computer.

So, you couldn't just make
a call, momma?

You can't shoot me
a kite, not one.

You know, if Sharea
was in jail,

- you know that you...
- Don't put my name

in your mouth, TJ.

Start me out, all right,
because you don't know

what momma would do.

You want me to pay

a $10 deposit fee

and a $3 flat fee

just to put money on your phone,

just so I can call you?

That's $13 for 15 minutes,
Junior.

And the only thing I can hear
is your misery,

and the absence
of the Holy Ghost

in the background.

Look at this material.

This man's club.
I got it in Vegas.

They was doing this deal
if you buy

two tanks of gas,
you get a free suit.

This shit nice.
Get a close up on it.

Look at this material.

Look at that.

Man's club,
look at these lapels,

that's gotta be,
that's Italian

or French, or something.

They probably import shit
with the tag on it.

You can't read it,
but...

you can tell about it
just by the font.

That's some upper echelon
shit right there.

Uh-hmm.
This motherfucking

into plastic, heard me?

Look, you gonna sign this
release form or not, okay?

Because my whole future
riding on this signature.

- I just need you to put...
- TJ, get that fucking paper

out of my face, okay? 'cause
I'm not signing this shit

because I don't wanna be in your
stupid ass movie.

Okay?

Okay.

Would you, uh...

Yeah. Okay.

...shake your ass on
Instagram though, huh?

Uh-hmm.

Underscore, underscore,
MrsTwerkulance.

Ain't nobody seen it yet,
but they will,

and don't try
to delete the account,

but guess what?

I already downloaded
all the videos.

Hmm. Okay.

Your son could use
a riding on this, too.

Hey, can you turn the
cameras off, please?

Come see a happy Jackson family
for a change.

Come on in.

We gonna start...
we gonna start the whole,

show whole the room, okay?

This is my ugly sister,
Sharea.

My name is Tijuana Jackson,

life coach with a goon hand.

You can't stand him,

no, they can't.

That's the thing about
family, man, you know,

it's a place you have
your biggest battles,

you know,
but it's also a way you go

to heal your wounds,
if you lucky.

And I'm hoping
my shit take off

like Miley Cyrus panties.
Once they happen,

then we out this bitch.
I'm gonna get my mom

that big old house
with the pool, heard me?

- Thank you.
- Momma,

TJ is smoking in my room.

No, I'm not.

Momma, we only gonna be gone
for a couple of days.

Anything you need,
just tell Sharea.

Just like when I was
in the joint.

Okay. Bye, boy.

Okay. You know,
I can't stand you,

but momma like you,
so hurry back.

Yeah. But don't let her
take the medication

on an empty stomach, man.

She'll nag you all damn day.

- Bye, Unc.
- You think all the shit

in the car packed just for me?

Your momma packed your shit
last night, boy,

this ain't Malaysia Air.
I need a good co-pilot.

- Get in the car.
- Listen. I don't...

- For real?
- Yes for real. I don't want you

sitting here
playing on your iPad all day.

I figured, what would your
uncle learn new stuff.

Can we go to Disney World?

It's already
in the itinerary.

Get in the fucking the car.

Jesus is alive.

In the car.

Better watch out he talking
to my fucking son.

Get in the car.

Come on, Justin.

Put on your seatbelt, boy.

Get in the fucking car.

Shit.

Hey,
what y'all doing?

Isn't that your
probation officer?

Tijuana Jackson,

he got miles,
yeah, that's right.

Ex-convict turned
motivational speaker.

Yeah. Prison Logic

♪ You got to stop,
getting complimentary start ♪

♪ Getting ready, yeah,
dig up on your confidence ♪

This from my own mixtape,

my new mixtape
about to rape the game,

fam style, heard me?

Ain't nobody stopping
when it's time

to take your lane.

♪ Take your lane ♪

♪ Take your lane ♪

♪ Take your lane ♪

♪ Take your lane ♪

♪ Take your lane ♪

♪ Take your lane ♪

♪ Take your lane ♪

Somebody stole my
Alpine stereo

back in the day.

Is that why you
don't hear nothing?

Are you enjoying yourself?

Yeah, but I can't wait
to get to Disney World.

Well, it's coming.

Y'all get it all on film.

I just wanna show
some bonding moments

with my nephew.

Y'all, y'all, come get
a close up of this.

Y'all wanna see some gators?

Throw that rock
in there, Lil Eric.

They didn't swarm this out
because they ain't

- throwing it off far enough.
- Son, that's an example...

- Throw it. Yeah, like that,
flick your fist, boy.

Put your hands down like...

there you go, there you go.
So what now?

Hey, you seemed
you're taking a picture

- while you're smiling.
- I'm not smiling.

Come on, boy.

I'm not getting in that water.

You better come on.

- Oh, that's a gator.
- What?

That's a...

ain't no gator, boy.

I'm just playing with you.

You're driving.

You can drive if
you want to.

Why can't
we go inside?

Watch your tone
with me, boy.

I thought you said
it was in the itinerary.

I said it was
in the itinerary.

I didn't say it was
in the budget. Now,

look, look here.
We ain't got

that Disney World
money right now,

but when this Toastmaster
thing pop off,

I might buy
your own Disney World.

Matter fact,
you know what I might do,

is I might buy Michael Jackson's
Neverland Ranch,

and open that up
to black folks.

Do you wanna go back
to the street sign

and get a picture
under that?

You can show your friends?

Wise man speaks

because he has
something to say.

And nigga talk
because he always got to say so.

Momma said
this is for you.

What's this?

I don't know.

Nigga,
this the release form.

This the release form.
She signed it.

We're making a movie, nigga.

We're going platinum, nigga.

You better be famous, boy.

Y'all see that?
She signed it.

I told you
what I told you.

I told y'all that I was
gonna get her to sign.

She know what's good for.

Toastmasters auditions.

This is that moment
of truth.

I'mma let you
carry my briefcase.

No.

My collar straight,
everything cool?

It's good.

Let's go
change some lives.

Nigga look
familiar as fuck.

That nigga looks
familiar.

How you doing, man?

Tijuana Jackson, life coach,
motivational speaker.

I'm here for
the Toastmasters.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Listen, man, no minors,

no smoking, and, uh,
you know, no cameras.

Oh, no, like, they... this is
like a little student film, man,

they just... they, they
filming my body, the glory.

Well, yeah, they can... they can
film whatever they want, man,

as long as it's not
inside, you know.

Oh, well, shit.

Well, Lil Eric, you gonna
stay in the car, okay?

You can't be serious?

No, not me, it's him.
He's saying no minors.

Yeah, sorry little, bro.

What is this,
a Miley Cyrus concert?

And y'all gonna have to
stay outside.

You got to... you got to sit
in the car, Lil Eric.

No.

Hey, Eric, do you want to film
some stuff out here?

Here.

Take this.

Look, this is on
and off, record.

Hey, look, I left
the key in the car,

you can listen
to the radio.

Heads up.

Definitely got this.

Look at all these Rounders.
How do you plead?

No contest, Your Honor.
They ain't even in my league.

What these niggas don't
understand is

when it's gang time,
they're playing stops.

No class.

- Now, yo, yo, yo.
- No class.

Fuck you nigga,
I was already up here.

I just went back to get
something in my car.

All right. All right.
Easy, easy.

Fuck you
ass.

That's what I do
with my mixtape,

Affirmation Music
Volume 1.

It's a drop, nigga.

- Oh, shit.
- What the fuck? Wait. Wait.

- It's a drop.
- Amiga.

Get out. Get out. Okay.
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.

Whoa. Whoa. Whoa.
Wait. Wait up.

Get away from me

Yo

Get down
the get down.

Ow, what is your problem?

Fucking crazy.
Are you serious right now?

And you, yeah, you.

Come here, man.
I see... no, I see you, man.

Come here. Hey, hey.

Yo, I need you to
stop filming me right now.

You said we can film
whatever we wanted

as long as not inside
the fucking building.

I know. I know
I'm saying you can.

Hey, Rachel. Rachel.

We're back to do
what we told now, huh?

You're gonna let that
bitch clown nigga

- intimidate you and to be like...
- Shut up.

- Hey, Maricon.
- I thought filming

police officers in Florida is
in accordance with Florida law,

as long as I don't interfere
with the investigation

and maintain a safe distance.

I can think of
about maybe two things

that you guys have
in common.

Does anybody wanna guess
what they are?

Go ahead.
You know what?

Raise your hand
if you still think

you're part of a Toastmasters
reality program.

Go ahead,
raise your hand.

Oh, my God. These are...

these are brilliant human
beings right here.

I got some bad news
for you, guys.

You all have outstanding
warrants

right here in Orlando County.

So if you guys wanna pay off
your debts today,

hey, you guys are gonna walk
away with no problem,

but the rest of you guys
are going for a little joyride

Appreciate y'all paying
off my warrant.

I'mma pay y'all back as soon as
I get my company up and running.

Where the fuck is my car?

Where the fuck
did I park my car?

Hey, Lil Eric.

What the fuck
happened to my car?

Hey, man, y'all see
a little 14-year-old kid

about this big?

Not this time.

Have a nice day though.

Lil Eric.

Lil Eric.

It's okay, Lil Eric,
where you at?

Fuck.

Let me see your phone.

No.

Then stop filming me.

Stop filming me.

Mr. Jackson,

we found Lil Eric.

He's at the precinct.

He's fine.

What precinct?

This point
got no damn sense.

Look, I'm outside
of my jurisdiction,

so if I go up
in that motherfucker,

I might not come
out. Okay?

So, one of y'all got to go in
there and get him.

There is a time
and place, homie.

There's a time
and a fucking place.

Did you find him?

They'll only release
him to a legal guardian.

Shit.
What if I'm ain't that?

So, I just sneak in
to Disney World.

What the fuck you do
with my car?

I don't know.
Do I look like Minnie Mouse?

Now we call Sharea,
she gonna blow this shit

way out of proportion,
I'm telling y'all now.

Well, yeah, we lost
the child.

Wouldn't want you to die
from second-hand smoke.

Be free.

So, did you call his mom yet?

We don't need
to call them.

- Why not?
- Because...

she gonna take that shit
to another level.

And she gonna overreact,

and then, she gonna get my momma
blood pressure,

man, you gonna fucking
piss me off.

So, who you calling?

Come here.

Hey, come here.

No, it's Rachel,

the girl with the camera.

I'm Asian.

Mr. Jackson wanted me
to let Sharea know,

Lil Eric is perfectly fine.

He is in jail,

but he wasn't arrested.

That nerd try to

question my damn
parenting skills,

dud, you gonna take my kid
for one day and leave

and sit in the car
like he's some kind of animal.

I think his demon is trying

to separate us with you, girl.

It ain't no damn demons, momma,

we should stop saying that shit.
It ain't nobody but Junior.

And you don't wanna see
it that way.

You wanna live in
the make believes.

I'mma just gonna sip my tea.

If you're looking for a demon,
his ass right there.

Jesus, you finish Sharea?

Don't call me
by my government name, nigga.

Are you done?

Are you done?

- No.
- Are you done?

Jesus.

- Check stub please.
- Cheryl...

- Proof of employment, please.
- No, I got... Cheryl, I got...

- Check stubs.
- I got them, Cheryl.

I got them,
but I forgot them.

Hmm. I know it's always
something with you.

- No. Cheryl...
- Are you trying to go back

- to jail, TJ?
- I thought they was in my car.

But then I realized
that I might...

You know what, TJ?
Don't play with me today

because I'm not
in the mood.

Cheryl.

Cheryl.

Cheryl.

What the fuck you
doing up there?

- TJ?
- You fucking with that

- Freddie Mercury-looking nigga?
- Oh, I got your

- Freddie Mercury right here.
- No, thanks, nigga.

- I don't do porn.
- Okay. Let me handle this.

Hey, you better tell that
motherfucker to kick rocks.

Turn them cameras off.
Turn those cameras off.

Yeah. Yeah. You know why,

because she don't
want the world to know

that she fucking around with
Doug, the Bounty hunter.

All right.
You about 30 seconds

- from getting choked out, boy.
- Boy?

Nigga, we don't in
the inside no more,

you fucking around
and get your manhood breach

- messing with me.
- Hey, listen, wait.

You better call
will.i.am, nigga,

ain't the DJ, boy.
I don't play, heard me?

TJ! What do you want?

What do you need, TJ?
What do you need?

You wanted... you wanted
proof of employment

- for the last few weeks, right?
- Yeah.

You got this push
broom motherfucker

all off in the crib.

Motherfucker,
all in his drawers and shit.

TJ.

You got check stubs?

Nigga, I'm proud of you.

I'm proud of you, TJ.

You can get back
to sling blade now.

Don't tell nobody
I was in a fight,

and don't put that shit
in my documentary.

Why not?

Because it's a violation
to my parole.

How long it take for me
to wake up?

♪ They talk about the
money I talk about the time ♪

♪ They talk about they needs
I talk about what's mine ♪

♪ They sitting on the comb,
I'm sitting on the home ♪

♪ They wanna super head,
shit, I wanna super dome ♪

♪ I got a bigger vision
I'm young Russell Simmons ♪

♪ I'm like a chicken hawk,
but I'm fucking pigeon ♪

♪ I only share with friends
They call it nepotism ♪

♪ And then remember all
the plan I am messing with ♪

- Watchtower.
- Yeah.

What do you think
about that?

Hey, man. Look, nigga,

if we gonna take this musical
empire to that next level,

don't sugarcoat that nigga,
just tell me how you feel.

You like it or not?

It was trash,

- like, hot garbage.
- Man, fuck you, nigga,

that version was cold than
a can of pussy,

eat you that shit,
let's do the hood.

This nigga is
just disrespectful, man.

Just...

Hey.
Where the fuck is TJ?

Fuck.

Hey, man, I'm gonna drop
for real,

this shit cold,
watch out, nigga.

Watchtower.

Punch it, nigga,
and after the refrain.

Watchtower.

Nigga, are you...

where the fuck he go?

Watchtower.

I'm recording vocals.

I don't give a fuck.

I don't care
if you're recording

the national
motherfucker anthem,

get the fuck out
here, TJ.

You
your fucking lot.

My brother is one of the first
niggas from Hollywood, Florida,

he got arrested on tops

and cheaters,

punch a girl on the face.

Ever since then,
I've been camera shy.

You broke my Rolex,
this should cost me $50.

What is these, TJ?

I told you.
They check stub.

They counterfeit stubs.

I don't know
nothing about that.

Yes, you do, and why would
you walk off your job?

You was doing so good,
and you left?

Get my cigarettes,
it's on my pocket, for me.

I ain't getting shit.

Hey, get off
with that cock.

Hey, take the... you know,
move that cock.

Y'all get his cock
on camera?

You about to get a lot
of cock where you going.

Y'all get his cock?

All right.

One second,
but this the last one.

All right. Look, uh...

you know, TJ
is... he's a gifted man.

That's, you know,
that's, that's real,

but you got to watch him.

You got to watch him
because you don't know

what you're gonna get with TJ.

You don't know
if you gonna get...

if you gonna get sunshine,
or if you gonna get moonshine.

And the terms
of TJ's parole,

honestly, for me... for me,

they're pretty reasonable,
honestly.

And every day,

I ask him,
I say the same shit.

I say, uh, "TJ, you know,
you go to counseling."

You know what I get?
Legs up.

Then I say, "Okay.

What about... what,
about community service?

Did you go to community service?
Did you do it?"

"Oh, I'm a soul train."

"What about work?"

"Yo, am."

This nigga.

Really, the truth is
you just... you can't help a man

that refused to help himself.

And that's what I got to know.

You know, that's...

that's it.
So, all right.

And you know
the worst part is that

I actually believed you.
I believed your down shit.

Do you ever think about
getting back into music though?

- TJ, do you hear me?
- Have a nigga pump his mixtape?

Counterfeit is a serious
offense. This is real.

Affirmation
music Volume 1.

Hey, you know what,
hey, he came back.

You know
what his cock.

Hey, homie, let me get you
with your cock, homie.

Hey, hey

So get your dog off
to prison can,

and this is the things
I get from you?

Okay. Cool.

- I can't.
- You call the cops on a nigga.

- I ain't doing it no more.
- Cheryl, you call the laws

- on a nigga, though?
- Hey, get him.

Tell me the truth,
and I can help you.

Or you're going back inside.

We have not used since
we got out.

We have two months
to give up in life.

I haven't

- I don't know what...
- Okay. So...

- All the respect, man.
- So you both clean?

- A hundred percent.
- A hundred percent.

- A hundred percent.
- Absolutely.

I'm on

Okay. Okay.

I'm giving you one last chance
and tell me the truth,

or you both taking
the piss tests.

Give me a tiny little
meth on the weekends,

or it's fine.
Nothing serious.

Don't look at him,
look at me.

He's not the one
that's gonna book you, I am.

You ain't talk to him?

Well, I'm not surprised.

You know
what to do with these?

Cheryl.

Do you know what
to do with those?

Okay.

Goodbye.

Hey, watch out.

Oh, shit, he saw us.

Why didn't you tell me
you were out?

I think the more distance
between you and me,

- the better off you gonna be.
- How did you figure that?

Watch your tone
with me now, boy.

Why didn't you call?

- Because Lil Eric...
- Because what?

Because your momma
keep making this thing

like everything
was my fault.

But it was your fault.

The first night
you came home,

there was no one
in the house

so you had to sleep
in the car.

What did I do?

I came out to sleep
in the car too

because I didn't want you
to be out there

all by yourself.

But as soon as we get
to the contest,

what did you do?

You told me
to wait in the car

all by myself for some stupid

Toastmaster thing
that turned out to be...

But what you ain't even
realizing is that great success

- requires great sacrifice. I...
- Great success?

If the only one benefitting
from it is you,

how great can it be?

Oh, whose bike is that?

Boy.

You gotta rinse it before
you put it up under the bed.

Put it down.

Put it down now.

Oh, why are you
so skinny, boy?

I've been riding my bicycle,
Momma.

Oh.

I saw this blog
and it said that...

...this was good
for the arthritis.

- You okay, Momma?
- Oh, yeah, I'm fine.

- Ooh.
- Okay.

So, what
exactly are you interested in?

Like, what's your passion?

What do you wanna do?

I wanna be a public speaker
like my uncle.

Hmm. Okay.

So, then we need to look
at your transcripts,

let's see what courses
that you already took.

I see you
took time to speak,

and you're
in regular English.

Maybe you should get
into English AP

to kind of learn grammar.

Legs up.

- Okay.
- Listen.

If you put a black woman's
baby in danger,

she gonna go from zero
to Remy real quick.

And if I'm being honest,
TJ has been more of a father

to little Eric
than my baby daddy ever was.

Now, he ain't perfect,

but he's trying.

Oh.

Um, I only had two prayers.

One was to see
my family unified

under the blood of Jesus.

Praise the Lord.

What's the other one,
Momma?

A big house
with a pool

so that we can
live together comfortably.

But as long
as we're together,

I don't need no pool.

I do.

- Listen now...
- Oh, shut up, boy.

"I do."

- Here we go.
- Ooh. Yes.

Yeah,
that's what I'm talking about.

Y'all put down
your cameras and come here.

- Come on.
- Is it enough for now?

Seriously?

Y'all stop acting up now.

Yes, ma'am.

Lord, we ask you
to bless this food,

and we ask you to bless
the white people

at this table.

Amen.

- Amen.
- All right.

Y'all, let's eat for real
and stop playing, okay?

What's wrong with the forks,

why I gotta stick me up...
oh, Lord, Jesus.

Let me tell y'all
something, man.

One thing my nephew
I would like to call it

my little guru
made me realize is

the whole point
of being a life coach

is to help others, you know?

Mainly my family
and my community,

heard me.

and there's a lot of people
out there winning the rat race.

Then what's a million dollars
to a slave

if he can't buy
his own freedom, you heard?

She own
the tall white boy

with the big carwash mustache.

He's already
been asked to resign.

What up, Levaughn?

Levaughn?

What up, nigga?

Yes, ma'am.

Boy, what happenin',

I here because I care
about y'all.

Tune, as far as I'm concerned,

someone fucked up
on their life already.

But me, for me,

I was a master
fuck-up-ist.

And this man
changed my life.

So that it could change yours.

It's just a matter of listenin'
and paying attention, you know.

a matter of
paying attention.

I'm... yo, fucking
pay attention, now man,

because every time so,
but yo,

I want to bring
my brethren right now,

no other than

Tijuana Jackson.

Yeah. Give it up
for my homie, Upgrade.

You know what I'm saying.

That's Toucan fam
right there.

It's Toucan fam,
real nigga shit, heard me.

I didn't get it.

Took getting cursed out
by my nephew,

I call him my guru,
Lil Eric,

to realize that
my success would come

from being selfless,

not selfish.

Uh-hmm.

Because when you got
a sense of purpose,

you gotta service
more than just you.

Oh, y'all didn't think
I would get that deep, huh?

Well, hold on, niggas,

because I'm deep
like giraffe pussy.

And what if I told you

that every nigga in here
got a purpose?

And that purpose stems from
one moment in your damn life?

I'm in my one moment like
the shit happened yesterday.

- Uh-hmm.
- Yeah.

When I was 13 years old,

my uncle tried
to put his finger

in my asshole
while I was asleep,

but I caught him.

Took about seven hours
of surgery

to get my foot out
of his fucking larynx,

fucked that nigga
voice box up good.

To this day when he talks,
he sound like...

uh, what's the name
of the, uh...

What?

What's the name
of the big old buff nigga

with the raspy voice who used
to win all the Grammys?

Uh, Big strong nigga used
to work out back in the 90s?

Had all the hit...
Macy Gray,

he sound
like that nigga.

Quiet!

Y'all go ahead and laugh,

but that's why
I brought up my uncle

and his big-ass fingers.

Your pain should be
the pathway to your purpose.

So when y'all get up
out these blocks,

don't seek success.

Seek purpose,

and let success find you.

Because success,

that's just an illusion.

Purpose,

that's the motherfucking
conclusion,

heard me?

I take it you two
are in good terms again?

Well, uh, we, uh...

we have... we have
an understanding.

Any plans
for the future?

Well, I mean, for me,
you know,

I just believe that
if you gonna be a life coach,

you gotta be a life coach 24/7

because life is a full-time job,
you know?

So you don't get
no off days on life,

and once this Prison Logic
take off,

you know,
phone gonna be ringing like

the second hand, heard me?

You know,
like the second hand

because the second hand
go around the clock.

Why you always
gotta speak in parables?

You know, I'mma need travel
permits once this shit take off?

I'll think about it.

What you mean
you gonna think about it?

Do you need me to speak
in parables, too?

- Drop me.
- I got you.

Well done.

I should have you
train my staff.

I do the same thing,
but this old nigga in the joint,

used to have to put him
on the toilet

and put stool out of
whenever

they fed us
that nutraloaf.

I remember TJ saying to me

excuse me, Mr. Jackson

saying to me when I was going
through my divorce,

"Sam," and I quote,

"You too good
for that chicken-head skank.

She be creeping."

And I knew exactly
what he meant.

May I see your license
and registration, please?

Fuck, he's acting out,

nigga, look like

any time you all need me,
just call that number.

Are you guys
filming something?

- Yeah.
- Yeah, what's that about?

About my life.
It's about...

Well, I'm a filmmaker, too.

It does nothing
for a nigga's self-esteem

when you got
a bigger motherfucker

twice your size
and put on the condom.

You wanna get honest
about it.

You okay, Momma?

TJ, stop!

I'm about to hit a funny bone.

S-U-I-C-I-D-E.

Suicide.

Because Sharea is an unhappy
individual committed

to the immediate demise
of my endeavors.

Suicide.

I need to go out and get
the okay.

I'm gonna get
the back leg.

I'm gonna get
the finger pop.

I'm gonna get
the dungarees,

I want no clean up.

It shouldn't take this long

to hand out some flyers.

Well, at one point,
did you say to yourself,

"We have a hit documentary
on our hands"?

At no point.

Oh, I thought
right away.

Well, it started out
as a class assignment,

just a 10-minute short,
but...

Yeah. But then Tijuana
inspired us to make it like a...

like a
whole documentary.

How did you do that?

Well,
he made us see that whether

it's a class assignment,

family engagement,
community service,

what's most often
asked of us

is the bare minimum.
It's up to us to do more.

Hey, you always
gotta give credit

- to the white folks.
- I'm not white.

And you were in prison
when we filmed this.

Yeah. They only wanna
interview you.

Man, just drink your juice.

That's okay, though.

Who got the book deal

and the merchandising deal?

- Matter of fact...
- Oh...

...mixtape out too,
cop that.

Why are you being
a little dramatic?

Don't you... uh-uh, don't you
lit that up down here.

- That's okay, momma.
- They really want it.

Y'all do the
pretty tiddy-diddy,

I won't get the keys
to the city now.

- Why y'all over this?
- But it was good, right?

You're too close.
Get in the back.

momma.